Original subtitles

[Theme music]

Theme song: Love, exciting and new.

Come aboard.

We're expecting you.

And love, life's sweetest reward.

Let it flow.

It floats back to you.

The love boat soon will be making another run.

The love boat promises something for everyone.

Set a course for adventure, your mind on a new romance.

And love, won't hurt anymore.

It's an open smile on a friendly shore.

It's love.

Welcome aboard, it's love.

Hey, where's gopher?

The way he's been acting lately, who cares?

Oh, come on, Julie.

Just because he put a dead chicken in with your nylons.

Oh, you weren't sore when he short cheated your bet?

No, I was with a short girl.

Gopher's just overdue for his vacation.

He's a little, uh, stir crazy.

A little?

Yeah.

Well, maybe by now he's got it out of his system.

Oh, yeah.

He's got it out of his system.

I don't know who you are, miss,

but you've stolen my heart.

Gopher, take that dopey thing off.

Ok.

Good morning.

Good morning.

Good morning, sir.

Gopher.

[Clears throat] Sir.

This is deputy captain Cunningham.

He's with another line, but he'll

be taking a refresher course with us

prior to taking command of his own ship.

This is Julie McCoy, cruise director.

Cunningham: Ms. McCoy.

Welcome aboard, sir.

Adam bricker, ship's doctor.

My pleasure.

Cunningham: Doctor.

And this is yeoman purser Smith, whose upcoming vacation

could become permanent.

Sir.

That man bears watching.

Gopher, how loony can you get?

How's this?

[Horn blowing]

[Music playing]

Hello.

Hello, welcome aboard.

Thank you.

Uh, Carter, Jeannie Carter.

Carter.

Ms. Carter.

You're on the fiesta deck, cabin 135.

That's just through the--

uh, I'm looking for another passenger, a Mrs. Vera Simpson.

Simpson.

Simpson checked in.

Uh, that's coral deck, 123.

Ok, now through these doors-- - coral 123.

--And down--

maybe I should have worn my nose.

Welcome aboard the Princess.

Enjoy your cruise.

I hope so.

Just leave it there, Douglas.

Oh, yes.

Hi.

I'm Adam bricker, your most ardent admirer.

All right, let's hear your scintillating line.

You'd like to buy me a drink, then

drop down to my cabin for a chaser,

because you're sure you know me from somewhere.

Am I warm?

Not as warm as I am.

Will I see you later?

Not if I see you first.

Have one of the help take care of these right away.

That's a real winner.

Oh, Ms. Atwood really is a nice girl.

She just has a few problems.

Hmm.

I wouldn't have guessed.

She-- she was engaged to a young man.

They were to be married several weeks ago.

He broke the engagement the day before the wedding.

Ah.

I'll have a little chat with her.

Straighten her out about men.

(Laughing) Oh.

Ok.

But do yourself a favor.

When you have that little chat, wear a suit of armor.

Ma'am.

Ma'am, here, let me help you with these.

Oh, no, that's all right, young man.

I can manage.

You sure?

I wonder if-- if you could tell me where-- oh!

Aw, ma'am.

Your camera is broken.

Oh, that's all right, young man.

Aw, gee.

It's not important, not at all.

What is important is--

is, at this stage of life, is that there are nice,

kind young people like you left in the world.

Oh, thank you.

Thank you very much.

[Music playing]

Hurry it up, Romeo.

I'm trying, fluffems.

These darn bags are heavy.

Hello.

Welcome aboard the Princess.

I'm Julie McCoy, your cruise director.

Uh, Maureen buell.

[Muttering]

Doesn't he knock you out?

Couldn't you die for a man who could actually

bench press a house cat?

Hi, I'm Everett buell.

Hello, how do you do?

Maureen was just joking.

Everett, the last time I made a joke

was when I said I do at our wedding.

Come on.

Don't you just love her sense of humor?

(Singing) 10 more days and I'm off of this ship.

10 more days and I'm off.

The lousiest [inaudible] time of my life.

10 more days and I'm off.

Ugh.

You're already off-- your rocker.

[Whistling]

Isaac!

You're supposed to be on vacation.

What happened to the ski trip?

No snow, so I thought i'd take a luxurious cruise instead.

Oh, brother.

Nurse, one more over the cuckoo's nest.

He's right here on the passenger list.

Mr. I. Washington, promenade 350.

Welcome aboard, Isaac.

Let's make that Mr. Washington, ok?

Ok.

[Clearing throat]

Uh, Mr. Washington.

You forgot your bag.

Who forgot?

Could you bring it along, kid?

[Music playing]

[Chatter]

Wally, you call this a Tequila sunrise?

I can mix a better drink with one bottle tied behind my back.

Now look, Isaac--

Mr. Washington.

[Clears throat]

Would you like me to make another one, sir?

Yeah.

Let's try and do it till we get it right.

Uh, let me have a Tequila sunrise, please.

You'll be sorry.

Well, hello there.

Say, I know you, don't I?

Yes, of course!

You're the guy who murdered his wife.

Guilty.

[Chuckling]

I, uh-- I'm surprised recognized me.

You don't really look like the soap opera type.

Oh, I've been a fan of yours for a long time.

Oh, thank you.

Imagine!

The star of "all my loves" here!

I'm Julie McCoy.

Uh, Mike adler.

Pleased to meet you.

I hate your guts.

Thanks, I needed that.

You ruined your father's business,

murdered your brother, married his wife,

and then murdered your wife.

Yeah.

Well, that's entertainment.

And furthermore, lucky lady, of all the women on this ship,

I have just chosen you to be my dinner

companion for the first night.

How about the last night of my life?

Is that a no?

If it isn't, it's a good hint that one is coming.

Whew.

My.

I've seen happier faces at a tax audit.

Uh, Mike adler.

Hi.

I'm Jeannie Carter.

Yeah, well, I'm not having the greatest

time in the world either.

I finally convinced my mother to take a vacation,

and she refused to come alone.

So here I am.

10 minutes on board ship, and she ditches me

for a floating gin rummy game.

Hello.

Well, I guess that's mothers for you, huh?

I'm sorry, did I say something wrong?

No, no.

It's just that-- it's not important.

Really.

Good afternoon.

Hello, captain.

Beautiful day, isn't it?

Almost as beautiful as that gorgeous outfit you're wearing.

Oh, almost?

Oh, thank you.

Now there's a man who knows how to pay a complement.

I said your frock was nice.

Nice isn't gorgeous, it's not a frock,

and you're about as romantic as a tree toad.

Hello.

I thought we might have a little chat.

Goodbye.

Is that little enough for you?

[Whistling]

You know, sometimes it helps to talk to someone.

You're a perfect stranger.

I have to be honest.

I'm not perfect.

You know, you're right.

I mean about talking to someone.

I know.

You mentioned your mother before.

Well, I grew up in an orphanage and a couple

of the foster homes.

I never knew my mother.

Sorry.

So I, uh, hired a detective agency

and I had her tracked down.

She's on this ship.

Are you serious?

Have you seen her?

No, not yet.

I-- I went to her cabin, but I chickened

out at the last minute.

I mean, all my life I have dreamed

about finding my mother.

What she'd say to me when I found her, how she didn't want

to give me up, how she wanted to keep me,

how she really loved me.

That's the dream.

The nightmare is that she slams the door in my face.

[Music playing]

[Morse code beeping]

A hurricane.

Wait till the captain sees this.

Sir.

Hmm?

I think captain stubing should see this report right away.

Listen, son.

You do your job, and I'll do mine.

Dismissed.

Anything you say, sir.

Oh, uh, excuse me.

Um-- I seem to be lost.

Well, indeed you are, unless of course you're

looking for the radio room.

Oh, no, no.

I was just looking for the lido deck.

Oh, that's very simple.

You take the starboard companionway

to the promenade deck.

And then after the first bulkhead--

oh, i-- i--

I'm sorry.

I don't quite follow.

Ah.

Never mind.

Here, let me draw you a map.

Oh, how thoughtful.

Now.

You got your glasses?

Here we are here.

Now, there is the dining room, but it's two decks below.

Now, there's the companionway that leads to lido deck.

Huh?

Oh!

Oh, thank you.

How nice to be able to help people in distress.

That's my job, ma'am.

I just happen to be better at it than most.

[Woman screaming]

Oops.

[Music playing]

You see that girl over there?

Yeah.

What about it?

She turned me down for dinner.

Well, what do you want me to do about it,

take away her pool privileges?

I want you to come over and kind of make

believe I'm somebody important.

You know, give me kind of a big build up.

Why not?

No sense both of us striking out this trip.

Hey, thanks.

[Clearing throat]

Well, Mr. Washington, um, how are your oil Wells, sir?

Oh, still gushing.

I understand you just bought a renoir for $750,000?

Yes.

Those French really know how to make fine racing cars.

(Whispering) Is she listening?

She's practically falling out of her chair.

Well, my dear, would you like to have dinner?

Oh, I'm sorry.

I have plans for dinner.

How about a nightcap?

[Music playing]

I'd recommend the smoked salmon, the, uh,

beef Wellington, the cherries jubilee, and a walk

in the moonlight with a handsome doctor.

You certainly give it the old college try.

Mm-hm.

You guys are all the same.

I wouldn't say that.

Some of us are wonderful.

All right.

Cabin a 276.

Show up around 11:00.

And you'd better be dynamite.

No, thanks.

It'd probably take dynamite to move you.

Will the owner of the blue Chevy license plate 22--

did I tell you i'm gonna go on vacation

in nine and a half days?

Really?

[Laughing]

Good evening.

Captain's table, please.

Oh, this way, sir.

Hmm.

Uh-- you have class.

Hey.

Just don't forget and start polishing the glasses.

Uh, Mr. Washington.

Captain stubing, may I present your last guest

tonight, Mr. Isaac Washington.

Good evening, merrill.

Don't get up.

Isaac, what are you doing here?

Vacation, merrill.

Good to see you again, old buddy.

Hello again.

Hi.

Mr. Washington, I understand you flew in from Paris

today on the concorde.

Oh, don't you just love the concorde?

Oh, yes.

I'd say it's the finest aircraft I've ever owned.

Merrill, chablis should be chilled.

It is.

Chilled, not frozen.

We've certainly come a long way

since that cold water apartment we first lived

in when we were married, huh?

A long way.

Yeah.

Unfortunately, it's all been downhill.

I don't understand.

I know, Everett, I know.

- Excuse me. - Hmm?

Good evening.

Hello.

Could you tell me where Mrs. Simpson is sitting?

Yes.

Uh-- it appears Mrs. Simpson is dining in her cabin

this evening.

Oh.

However, I would be honored if you would dine with--

I'm really not hungry.

- Hi. - Hi.

My mother's not here tonight.

Well, mine ate in about 10 minutes.

I think she was afraid the cards would get cold.

Listen, would, uh, you like to have dinner with me?

Please.

I've had the chef prepare your favorite dish.

Oh?

Actually, it's my favorite dish.

Fillet of armadillo.

Ah.

Ah, Mrs. Worth.

I see you've found the dining room all right.

Oh, yes.

Thanks to your little map.

Ah.

Well, keep it.

There's nothing worse than being lost at sea.

Ah, duty calls.

I'll relieve you on the bridge shortly.

No hurry.

Enjoy an after dinner Brandy.

You're in good hands with Cunningham.

Oh!

Be careful.

I'm your officer.

I can dig it.

You know, Cunningham is doing an excellent job.

I'd feel comfortable leaving the ship in his hands.

He seems capable enough.

Yeah.

In fact, tomorrow when we anchor off cabo San Lucas,

I think I'll let him take command of the ship

and take a little excursion.

It's a lovely spot.

Maybe you'd like to come with me, Adam?

I'd love to.

Oh, that sounds like a lovely day.

Oh, that'd be terrific.

Yes, yes.

Why-- uh, why don't we all go?

Aren't you going to join your friend,

the captain, Mr. Washington?

Um, no, no, no.

No, no, no.

I didn't come on a cruise to mingle with the help.

Oh-- oh, um.

You don't want to lose your mad money.

Oh, no indeed.

And more important, I don't want to lose my map.

[Dramatic music]

You know, I really admire a self-made man like you.

Well, you see, I'm in television.

And believe me, I get my fill of phonies and people like that.

They're always trying to make you believe they're something

they're not, you know?

At least you're real.

Look, Mara, there's something that i--

I must confess to you.

If it's another woman, I don't want to know about it.

You just tell her that I'm in the race now.

[Music playing]

Jeannie.

Which cabin is your mother in?

Why?

Just wanted to get this over with--

no, don't. Mike, please.

I'll go with you. It'll be fine.

No, I know what you're trying to do, and I appreciate it.

But I've gotta do this alone.

Well, this is something you can't do alone.

Um, did you happen to notice that I just kissed you?

Oh.

I noticed.

I'm glad.

[Lively music]

Crewman (on pa): Launches for cabo

San Lucas are now ready for boarding

on the coral deck gangway.

You're going to love this little island.

Believe me, it's one of the most romantic hideaways

in the entire world.

Oh, it sounds so exciting.

Mrs. Worth.

Yes?

Found you another camera.

Oh, gopher, you shouldn't have!

Now, let me show you how it works.

Julie. - Yeah?

Will you pose for us, please?

Sure.

Ok.

Now, you just look through there and press this button.

Oh!

Gopher, your vacation can't come soon enough.

Shame on you.

[Laughing]

Now there's a man with a real sense of humor.

Ugh.

Uh-uh.

I have your launch ready, sir.

Thank you, Mr. Cunningham.

Oh, it's nothing.

My feeling exactly.

For the next two hours, the ship is in your command.

Be seeing you, deputy Cunningham.

Make that captain Cunningham!

What's up?

Here we go again.

My mother went into cabo San Lucas.

Eh, she'll be back.

Yeah.

[Sighing]

- Jeannie. - What?

Let me ask you something.

Is all this worth it?

Look.

You know you're from Irish and Italian stock, right?

That you were born in the south and from a middle class family.

But most of all, you know you were loved.

That's really all I have to know.

I just don't want to see you get hurt.

I won't.

I just have to know, and this is the best

chance I'm ever going to have.

Anyway, today's shot.

Not a chance.

Do you know I have a day planned for you that'll not only take

your mind off your troubles, it'll get your wash whiter

and brighter as well.

Will it clean my dentures?

[Music playing]

Mrs. Worth: Oh, what an exquisite lagoon!

Julie: Captain, it's perfect!

Gopher: (Singing) Row, row, row your boat

gently down the stream.

Julie: Gopher!

Everett: How'd you find it, captain?

Stubing: I spent some time down this way

when I was in the Navy.

I was on leave and went exploring.

[Shouting]

Oh, it's just like I remembered.

Oh, captain!

You were right.

This has to be one of the most beautiful spots on the earth!

Yes, and totally uninhabited.

[Birds cawing]

Except for some wild peacocks.

[Laughing]

Fantastic!

Lead on, captain stubing.

Uh, you're very quiet for a change.

I was just thinking, sir.

What a terrific spot for a snack bar.

Here, let me-- let me lead.

I know this very well.

Look at [inaudible].

Isn't this magnificent?

[Excited chatter]

Little damp in here.

This is the way.

Julie: Captain stubing said this place was totally uninhabited.

[Suspenseful music]

[Birds cawing]

Stubing: Ah, there's your wild peacock up there.

Mrs. Worth: Oh no!

[Laughing]

Spectacular.

Look at that.

Move it along, gopher.

Look.

Now, isn't this magnificent?

Oh, wow.

Oh!

My goodness.

Oh, captain, this is paradise!

Gopher: Where's the beach club?

I don't even know you.

Hey, look!

Who was that?

Before you get too excited, Everett's favorite pastime

is ufo sightings.

He spends nights in the swamps just looking for them.

I saw something.

I did too!

Mrs. Worth: Something did move in there.

[Music playing]

[Knocking]

Come in.

Sir.

There's another report about that hurricane.

It's still heading this way.

There's always a hurricane headed somewhere, sailor.

But shouldn't we notify captain stubing?

Why?

What for?

I'm here.

I'll handle it.

Dismissed.

Isn't it beautiful?

Oh, yes.

Oh, captain, this island of yours is cleansing to the soul.

Kiki: Yeah, but it's murder on the hairdo.

Everett: Ah, it's been a great day.

Thanks a lot for bringing us here, captain.

Oh no.

The launch is gone.

Well-- well, what did that, a shark?

A knife.

A shark with a knife?

Some madman cut this rope.

I don't see it anywhere, sir.

Well, what are we gonna do?

I don't know.

But whatever it is, we're gonna do it here.

Look, there he is again!

(Singing) Happy birthday to me.

Happy birthday to me.

Happy birthday, happy birthday.

Anyone remember the last line?

[Laughing]

[Music playing]

Crewman (on pa): Good afternoon.

The last launch is now returning from cabo San Lucas

and the ship will sail in 15 minutes.

Mm.

So I'm standing there, right, and this little old lady

comes up.

She's carrying an umbrella.

And she whacks me with it right on the shoulder.

And she says,

(Scottish accent) I know you, Brad Sanders.

I know you're planning on murdering that nice Dr. Gerard.

And you won't get away with it.

Smacks me again, and then storms off.

Unbelievable.

Well, I guess they're back.

That means my mother's back.

Mine too.

Well, I'm as ready as I'll ever be, I guess.

What are you gonna say?

I don't know.

I'll think of something.

Wish me luck.

Mm-mm.

You don't need it.

Hey, Wally.

Hey.

Getting a little rough out there.

Yeah, I guess it is kind of choppy.

Maybe there's a storm coming up.

Listen, I'm gonna check with the radio room.

I'll be right back, ok?

Ok.

Well, Ms. Carroll, how about a tall, cool planter's punch?

Sounds good, but I think I'll wait for Mr. Washington.

Why, you think Isaac can make it better than I can?

Nothing he does would surprise me.

The man is amazing.

A jet pilot, Polo player, race car

driver, real estate developer--

magician.

Magician?

Well, sure.

He'd have to be to do all that on his bartender's salary.

His what?

Of course, he probably makes a lot more than I

do because he's on steady.

You know, I'm just taking his place while he has a week off.

And then there's tips, which you never really declare

100% to internal revenue.

That liar.

Wally: Hey, everybody does it.

Excuse me.

Waiters, taxi cab drivers.

When my wife had her gallbladder out,

even the surgeon asked for cash.

Keep walking.

Hut, 2, 3, 4.

Hut, 2, 3, 4.

All right, move.

Come on, keep walking.

Hut, 2, 3, 4.

Keep your eye on the road ahead.

One false move, and you'll all be dead.

Poetic for a killer.

Look, maritime law is very specific on charges

of kidnapping.

You could get life imprisonment for this, you know.

Stop antagonizing him, captain.

The blimp's right, folks.

Keep moving.

Hut, 2, 3, 4.

Hut, 2--

[laughing]

[Whistling]

[Gasps] Look!

Kind of a low budget condominium.

Wow!

Oh!

Oh, I can't believe it!

Hut, 2, 3, 4.

Oh, look-- look at the--

[excited chatter]

Isn't this beautiful, Maureen?

Oh, shut up, Everett.

Don't you know we're being kidnapped?

Yeah, but it's still beautiful.

[Chatter]

Shh!

Everyone inside.

Everyone-- [laughing] Inside.

Ok, we're going.

All right.

Don't shoot.

We're going.

Mrs. Worth: My goodness gracious.

[Suspenseful music]

I know it doesn't look like much,

but I did it without a decorator.

[Laughing]

[Door slamming]

Give it a good push as hard as you can--

oh, it's locked.

Oh dear.

Well, somebody better think of something,

because I'm sure as hell not going to spend more than 10

minutes in this chicken Coop.

You should have asked for the deluxe hut.

Well, perhaps if we were all quiet as mice,

captain stubing could think of a plan.

Thank you, Mrs. Worth.

If it'll help you, I'll give you a hint.

I'm very gullible.

Thank you very much.

Why don't we all charge the door?

It wouldn't do you any good.

I've got office furniture piled up against it.

It's no good, doc.

He's got office furniture piled up against it.

Oh boy.

Look who's gullible.

Where would I get office furniture

on an uninhabited island?

[Chatter]

Everybody be quiet!

Yes, sir.

Let me think.

Right, let baldy think.

[Knocking]

Woman: Come in.

Mrs. Simpson--

can I help you, ma'am?

Mrs. Simpson just stepped out.

No, it's all right.

[Knocking]

Enter.

Oh.

Excuse me, Mr. Cunningham.

Uh, is captain stubing here?

Ah.

Well, he's not back from shore yet.

Oh.

Well, I was just up to the radio room,

and they tell me that a hurricane is headed this way.

The first one in 20 years.

I'm well aware of that, thank you.

And it's 19 years.

Um, sir, what are we going to do about it?

We?

We aren't going to do anything.

I'm going to do it.

Do what?

Just who are you anyway?

Isaac Washington, chief bartender.

Well, then don't just stand there.

Go get me a drink.

[Music playing]

[Wind howling]

What's he doing?

He's just sitting in his hammock lighting his pipe.

I always admired a man who smoked a pipe.

When I smoked a pipe, you said that it made you sick.

Not it.

You.

He looks bored.

That makes two of us.

Kiki.

You add an entirely new dimension to the word boring.

You oughta know.

You wrote the book.

Now, we've got to get down to the beach

and light a signal fire that'll be seen by our ship.

Sir.

How do you know the ship is still there?

How do you know it hasn't moved on without us?

And how about this man Cunningham.

How well do you know him?

Is he trustworthy?

Did you leave the keys in the ignition?

All these are questions that have to be answered.

The only question that has to be answered

is when did your brains fall out?

Look, maybe we can lure him in to opening the door.

That's a good idea.

We'll use one of the ladies.

Someone seductive.

Uh-- captain.

Um, would you like me to try?

Oh, sure.

Farrah fawcett minor.

All right, everybody listen.

Mr. Buell, doc, and I will stand on either side of the door.

Gopher, uh, you will climb to the ceiling

and lurk there, waiting to drop.

What a stupid plan.

Pardon me, do you have another?

No.

Well, then why don't you do us all a favor

and stop flapping your lips.

All right, everybody take your places.

[Suspenseful music]

All right.

Ok.

Ms. McCoy.

Hmm?

It's all yours.

Yes, sir.

[Sultry music]

Yoo-hoo!

Mr. Man.

Mr. Man?

Well, I don't know his name, sir.

David p. Crothers.

But you can call me baby cakes.

By the way, the one I really think is seductive

is the little old lady.

[Laughing]

That, uh, young skinny one doesn't do a thing for me.

What kind of a dumb plan is this?

He knows about it.

It's worth a try.

Are you game, Mrs. Worth?

Why not?

Seductive.

[Laughs nervously]

Mr. Baby cakes.

Guess what?

What?

I'm naked in here.

Really?

Can the others see you?

No, they're-- they're asleep.

Really?

That's right.

They're exhausted.

[Laughing]

Isn't this fun?

You see how gullible I am?

He's disappeared.

He must be right outside the door.

Go on, Mrs. Worth.

Get ready, everybody.

Mr. Baby cakes, where are you?

[Goat bleating]

[Yelling]

Peek-a-boo!

[Laughing]

What is the matter with you people?

Don't you know you're dealing with a man with a gun?

Now, what are you bullying a goat for?

Why don't you wise up and ask me why I captured you?

All right.

Why did you capture us?

Because I've lived here all by myself for 21 years,

and I've been happy as a clam except for one thing.

Never ever in my whole life have I

had a surprise birthday party.

You kidnapped us so you could have a birthday party?

A surprise birthday party.

[Laughing]

Listen to me.

You've got to allow us to signal our ship.

Not till after the party.

I want a cake, some presents, and butter brickle ice cream.

Also funny hats.

Now, this is out of the question.

Ok.

Forget the funny hats.

But there's one more thing.

It's my main present, and i--

i-- I really, really want it.

A set of tinkertoys.

Excuse me.

Excuse me, doctor.

Captain.

Uh-- uh, look, Mr. Crothers.

I have the most wonderful idea for your birthday party.

Oh, yeah?

If it's pin the tail on the donkey,

I'm fresh out of pins and tails.

Uh, would an iguana do for a donkey?

Oh, no, no, no.

See, my idea is to hold your birthday party on the ship!

Why?

Well-- why not?

I mean, it has everything.

Look, look, let me show you.

Now, this-- this is the map that the deputy captain drew for me.

Now, look.

There's the, uh, coral dining room,

the acapulco lounge, the pirates cove, the lido deck--

stubing: The hurricane.

The what?

Where?

Heading this way.

This is the official weather forecast for this region.

There's a hurricane due.

Oh, my goodness.

Oh boy.

That changes everything.

I'm glad to see that you're a sensible man.

Yeah.

We've gotta hold that party indoors.

Crewman (on pa): Due to inclement weather,

today's jackpot bingo game has been moved from the lido deck

to the starlight lounge.

Two out of three.

[Knocking]

Enter.

Mr. Cunningham.

Captain stubing's launch hasn't returned yet.

I know that.

Well?

Aren't you going to put out to sea?

We can't let that hurricane catch us at anchor.

We have 600 passengers on board.

I know that captain stubing would

want us to think of them first.

Us?

Who's us?

If it's any of your business, I was

just about to make my decision when you came barging in here.

I'm sorry, sir.

I was just trying to help.

I remember in a similar situation once,

captain stubing thought he had a better chance of outrunning

the storm in the open sea.

Hmm, he had us under way in five minutes.

Well, he has his way of doing things, I have mine.

Five minutes.

Hm.

Hello, bridge.

This is deputy captain Cunningham.

Weigh anchor.

We sail in 30 seconds.

Huh?

Oh.

[Clearing throat] Very well.

Five minutes.

[Suspenseful music]

Oh, I feel so helpless, like there's nothing we can do.

Oh, there's a lot we can do.

We can prepare for the hurricane.

We can work on another plan to escape.

And if worse comes to worse, we can die.

I can't afford to die.

I got a vacation coming up.

We're not going to die.

What we are gonna do is try to get some butter brickle

ice cream for Mr. Crothers.

And a set of tinkertoys.

Oh, sure.

We'll just run over to tinkertoys city on

the other side of the island.

Aw, don't despair, dear.

A rescue party may still be sent from the ship.

I hope not.

With a hurricane coming, I'm sure that deputy

captain Cunningham had enough sense to head for open waters.

Better he risks our 8 lives than the lives of 600 passengers.

[Knocking]

Mara, it's me, Isaac.

Your man of the hour.

Come in.

Ah.

Don't say a word.

Just stand there and let me drink in your beauty.

Drink.

What an appropriate word for you to use.

Say what?

What's on tap for tonight?

A game of gin?

Oh, I don't know.

Oh, we will be running into a little rough weather.

Oh, well in that case, we'd better batten down the hatch,

or we could end up on the rocks.

Mara, I don't think you should take this so lightly.

I mean, a hurricane can be a very fearsome thing.

It's just a big wind.

I've had a lot of experience with big winds.

The biggest of them all--

hurricane Isaac.

What?

Mr. Washington, the real estate operator, the

Polo player, the jet pilot--

the bartender.

Bartender.

You're a big phony, just like all the rest of 'em.

Uh, Mara-- now, look.

I was, um-- uh--

just play acting, you know?

Little innocent make-believe.

- Make-believe? - Yeah.

Really?

Well, then make-believe this isn't a book.

Uh, Mara, wait--

make-believe this isn't [inaudible]..

Hey, come on.

Look, i--

make-believe that this isn't a pot.

[Crashing]

Make-believe this isn't-- this isn't a vase!

[Laughing nervously]

Nothing to worry about, folks.

Just termites.

Whew.

Everett was right.

We're gonna die!

Mrs. Buell, the only chance we have of coming through this

is to behave calmly and to do what we have to do.

Captain, what do we have to do?

We'll shore up the windward side of the hut,

ride out the storm there.

It's our only chance.

Yes, sir.

Dave, get in here!

What do you want?

Open this door!

That is an order!

Bring me your ax, your saw, your hammers,

whatever tools you used to build this hut right now.

[Suspenseful music]

[Theme music]