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[Music]
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[Applause]
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[Applause]
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[Music]
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[Applause]
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[Music]
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I was at the end of my tether I was
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desperate
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although I was daunted at the prospect
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at the time I felt had the support of my
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husband-to-be when you were young you
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always think you're prepared for
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everything and you think you have a
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knowledge of what's coming ahead I
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desperately wanted it to work I loved my
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husband
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and I wanted to share everything
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together and I thought that we're a very
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good team have you got it I do indeed
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will that be all sir
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darling this is a girl's room someday
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you'll give a nice gathering like this
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just like Papa gave me
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[Music]
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there are little girls here thanks to
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you sir there was a 30% increase in
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female applicants this year well I like
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my own sound
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you know I feel a little funny rising a
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week later than everyone else but why do
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much polyester you miss anything
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important I'm sure someone can be
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appointed to bring you up to speed
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no no I just want to blend in oh bloody
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hell
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your royal jaw will please call me will
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Lewis so um where is he run then oh it's
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just stand here and you are I'm Kate sir
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I will
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sorry Oh Kate Middleton I hope this is
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me yes
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whatever did you find that picture me do
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it I thought we burned all these sorry
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sir see as we missed one very nice
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meeting you okay
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[Music]
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they saved you a seat
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Michaelangelo with arguably his most
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famous work the Statue of David imagine
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from an unremarkable block of marble a
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man with nothing more than a simple
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chisel carved some would say freed one
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of the greatest masterpieces of all time
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you might think he would have given the
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poor sod a bigger I was going to say
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slingshot where just go yet where does a
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girl since yeah I've missed three
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classes already
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if this paper is anything short of
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brilliant I will fail simple as that
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can't get distorted for you are you mad
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he is your aid isn't he I thought you
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were my aid where are these these notes
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that you're going to give me I'm afraid
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I'm not the world's best note-taker
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alright fine you want notes thank you I
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missed that century Kate yoohoo Kate and
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we need to alerts on the Rococo period
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got anything good listen we should have
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interrupted you I will manage with what
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I have no really
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Thanks sorry to disturb you sir I've
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been trying to reach you but apparently
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you're not answering your phone I'm not
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answering my phone because I'm in a
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library working or rather trying to
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respect your royal highness
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and I'm going to have to remind you and
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your friends that this is a quiet study
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area of course please forgive us let me
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just say we're also pleased to have you
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here sir
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good good to be here you getting me in
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trouble my apologies sir but if I might
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have a word it's fairly important
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concerns the dedication you're giving on
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Saturday
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[Applause]
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are you gonna get that mate it's the
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Queen well no what she she would never
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call this out I was talking about
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Cynthia she's texting me now you're
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supposed to be here Oh turning our
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attention to the Italian Renaissance
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where much like the Mafia we see in
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movies today the Medicis ruled Florence
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through threats bribes and arranged
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marriages as far as we know there were
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no horse heads slipped under bedsheets
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but it was Cosimo de'medici ruling
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Florence in the mid 15th century who
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many consider one of the first if not
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the first Mafia godfather
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14:53 my times I chose the fall of the
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Byzantine Empire made systematic
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brushstrokes it was massager brilliant
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by the time I get back the reticent 4:16
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a lightsaber
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I hope your comedy school yep not short
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my dear no faith much I'm here I'm fine
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babe thanks for the same pretty girl
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she's a real chick doesn't change thanks
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mate she's just doing a job buddy I'm
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not going anywhere
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don't you see I'm having an audience
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with our future king no don't get me
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wrong
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your dad nice enough walking on like
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come on we all know you should be king
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no it's not necessary James
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to be perfectly honest with you I've
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been giving some serious thought to
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chucking all in
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seriously you're leaving I've been
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feeling a bit claustrophobic here and it
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don't it yep
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I mean you're doing it you're managing
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yes it's in the pub just now
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can I say something okay I know this
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isn't my place at all or even my
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business but when we do ever have the
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chance again to live this close to a
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normal life look at what you have here
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you have four years of of being around
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people your own age and finding friends
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that you're gonna have forever your four
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years of being your own person see well
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this is it this is your normal
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I actually rose actually worth the
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bother your jab
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you are a certified beautiful but that
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result evil
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[Music]
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son isn't a Zegna isn't it just jr. just
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have to wait so what classes you're
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gonna take next semester hold on keep
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them keep still there are salsa well um
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I've seen about takings for healing you
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care for sample Compton Simpson I just
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told you that I love The Simpsons
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what's going on oh my god oh my god I
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completely lost track of time
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okay two minutes okay okay bye hot date
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my lips are sealed
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I am sworn to secrecy
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[Music]
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[Applause]
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[Applause]
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so brother this is what we papered it is
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for charity arey
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[Applause]
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[Applause]
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[Music]
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[Applause]
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[Music]
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[Applause]
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[Music]
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[Applause]
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[Music]
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[Applause]
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[Music]
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[Applause]
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excuse me miss would you care to come
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back to my castle from it just jog on me
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no yeah Nancy boy Kate this is my
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extremely shy brother Harry
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hello Oh mr. Duncan oh good to see you
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fully clothed here new Duncan was such a
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natural Duncan's been doing this as we
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were 15 always parading around the DA
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Pomona Skippy yeah look at this look at
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this family resemblance yeah yeah you
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got her eyes mate and you've done this
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joke before so but five times the gaze
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is playing a bit thing thank you very
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much top you up it's very very nice a
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great honor to meet your acquaintance a
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pleasure and an honor indeed and it's
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good to be in your company but let's get
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this party started
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okay son right who's up for some never
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have I ever you go around the group and
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everyone says something that they may or
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may not have done and if you have ever
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done that thing you drink never have I
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ever done my own laundry
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never have I ever
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puked in the middle of a French exam
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funny never have I ever worn black lace
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see-through lines are so hard that it
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could speed up global woman for 100 son
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I understand it's okay
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right I see that sounds gonna be it yeah
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never have I ever you tucked into bed by
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Sir Elton John you I told you that in
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confidence there's nothing sacred time
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sir whatever come on
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okay my turn never have I ever kissed a
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prince
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well mother had me kiss you when you're
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cruising in the body weight for drink
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I'm a I never smoked you oh yeah but
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what about father and granddad
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[Applause]
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[Music]
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oh all right we'll even a phony re in
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their cafeteria
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that's just community showers huh well
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we're gonna get yes absolutely
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[Music]
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you see this part of it here look at
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this
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it's the instruction manual the security
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system 8 it's like we're living in the
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matrix
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that's a remote control you plonker
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maybe attention please we we thought
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we've decided that you guys gonna help
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us keep this place nice and shiny and
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clean most importantly ki shaadi
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Nickerson
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[Music]
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so what you have to do is we have to put
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the detergent in this one and then the
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fabric softener can go in this one and
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then if you have a new bleach you can
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put it in that one easy I mean I'm
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having a touch you have been in the
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catbird ok come over we'll use this
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washer into the cap like so and then
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[Music]
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it's that you see how easy that was
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it's at the totem on should you ask me
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pathetic I'm starving
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Kate it's pretty more of that fish pie
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from Sunday I polished it over breakfast
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sorry well I'm not eating any more pizza
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okay okay can't finish this now ELISA
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turn that up going around about wills in
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his social life you know we can only
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guess what's going on up there in that
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posh flat and Hope Street and two of
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those flatmates are very cute female was
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indeed anyway here's an appropriate
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dedication to the royal birthday boy
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here's okay so the gatehouse of love
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[Music]
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[Music]
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so I'm guessing will my track repair
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haven't you notice this room will loves
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Africa it runs in the family when we
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were younger
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his mum sports against landlines there
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his dad does a lot of conservation work
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what yes
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animal are you tonight huh Miami lioness
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with that keen eyesight of yours can you
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tell me under which cup I'm hiding the
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marble wait
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what's that there behind your ear oh my
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your ears are nearly as big as mine now
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take your card but don't let me see it
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let me show it to all of your friends
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Charles I just left William all smiles
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he was having a good luck with the dance
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brother and sister I mean Vince Lee
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relieved what about you my dear well how
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are you feeling well so it hasn't been a
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tiny bit awkward but everyone's been
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very pleasant beste put me at ease I'm
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so glad
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now it's relevant thank you
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now we all know elephants have an
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excellent memory so you will remember
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that card well won't you so good of you
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to try to end the rift between fence
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William wanted more than anything
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and now a letter if you would do me the
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favor of kindly opening your purse for
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our distinguished guests oh oh my what
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have we here
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[Applause]
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[Music]
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[Music]
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[Applause]
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Jenna I am so so pleased or everything
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thank you I wouldn't have missed your
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21st for anything well good because
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you're the guest of honor at the gender
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Chango we took Shannon Bordeaux
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Nina Mu Shu ku tomandamanda
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Oh have you seen the father
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he's been I'm doing his routine bit kids
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he will be absolutely excited to see
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Jenna Kirk goddess of the Rift Valley
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also known as the Happy Valley setting
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certain circles their parents have been
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trying to set them up for years
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Kate
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okay
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okay so you finally made it to my castle
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after all that are you joining us that
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is Kate Middleton one of Williams
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governments I'll introduce you to her
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and introduce you now we need to get to
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the bit with the bear the bear came
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afterwards when the helicopter crashed
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I've still got the scar can you see that
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well no well Cushing has done ah Miss
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Middleton I'm loving to see you again
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lost well I think it may be for Curtis
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for you to go that way who knows you may
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bump into a familiar face
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[Music]
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look sir tacular great fan isn't it just
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had my 200th public appearance of North
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barely had time to change into my
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costume oh my goodness a lot of people
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don't come to London so we just travels
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to them to see what's going on give them
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encouragement some have new factories
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some unemployment but you have to
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encourage them
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[Music]
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[Music]
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and you are my dear Kate Middleton your
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majesty
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I mentioned Daenerys with Prince William
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Oh whenever Fab Four flatmates I've
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heard about I overheard you mentioning
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your public appearances man she must be
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terribly exhausted
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II love traveling I was giving a
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gallantry award once to a young soldier
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and I said to him it was a very brave
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thing you did and he said it was just
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the training your majesty I think
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training is the answer to a great many
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00:29:12,169 --> 00:29:22,249
things I think it's time you go probe
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grandma it's smashing party console
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thank you
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you and father hit a bull's-eye with
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this one join us in the ballroom we'll
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be playing some of your favorite tunes
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Strauss waltzes
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[Music]
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I know there's a fascination why do it
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mom don't step on our toes Kutner like
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you never did will she's very beautiful
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a friend now she is sound very special
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have just
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[Music]
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00:30:35,760 --> 00:30:38,380
it's not often we get to dress up and
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have nice glasses and the best china
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otherwise I wouldn't see the light of
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day it is splendid to be able to show it
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we don't actually live like this all the
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time let me show you
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[Music]
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00:31:11,929 --> 00:31:13,530
my mother taught me
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[Music]
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00:31:41,190 --> 00:31:44,250
well let's see here well we have some of
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your favorite fish baking them inside
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here and some certified organic
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vegetables roasting right over inside
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[Music]
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00:32:27,410 --> 00:32:50,650
[Music]
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00:33:04,820 --> 00:33:10,260
so um well what made you do all this
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tonight I just you know you are always a
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00:33:18,180 --> 00:33:22,460
mime cooking around here in the flowers
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and candles make a special dinner oh
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00:33:29,390 --> 00:33:32,390
yeah
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I am I have a much more movies yeah I
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thought maybe okay Watson multi-person
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it if you like yeah sounds like a
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00:33:59,850 --> 00:34:05,230
perfect night to me what you did tonight
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00:34:05,230 --> 00:34:09,449
for me it's so special
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00:34:09,449 --> 00:34:12,449
yeah
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so did you know this is my favorite
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00:34:33,179 --> 00:34:36,090
billions club a lot of things I didn't
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00:34:36,090 --> 00:34:37,710
know about you before we start that oh
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00:34:37,710 --> 00:34:41,639
really like what for example how draw
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00:34:41,639 --> 00:34:43,260
stuff you are in the morning before
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00:34:43,260 --> 00:34:50,399
we've had your first tee way you talk
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when you gonna back Africa your silly
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00:34:56,040 --> 00:35:05,640
little love alright enough about me what
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00:35:05,640 --> 00:35:09,660
about you what about me well what don't
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00:35:09,660 --> 00:35:17,430
I know about you well I was a bumblebee
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00:35:17,430 --> 00:35:24,320
once as well as a dinosaur a cowgirl
400
00:35:24,320 --> 00:35:32,790
pirate so basically you're telling me
401
00:35:32,790 --> 00:35:35,430
you have multiple personalities it's
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00:35:35,430 --> 00:35:36,330
much worse
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00:35:36,330 --> 00:35:40,440
there's child labor you see when I was
404
00:35:40,440 --> 00:35:43,560
six and my sister was five model my
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00:35:43,560 --> 00:35:49,410
parents party planning had opened my
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00:35:49,410 --> 00:35:54,530
mind from there to star in soneji's gap
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00:35:54,530 --> 00:35:57,770
alright so come on let's try this one
408
00:35:57,770 --> 00:36:00,210
get another closer a little bit closer
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00:36:00,210 --> 00:36:04,140
lean down and face your hair flat
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00:36:04,140 --> 00:36:05,610
[Music]
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00:36:05,610 --> 00:36:10,950
very good and now when you come through
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00:36:10,950 --> 00:36:29,170
the shortest route that was great
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00:36:29,170 --> 00:36:31,000
Cheers
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00:36:31,000 --> 00:36:50,579
[Music]
415
00:36:53,329 --> 00:36:58,109
thank you everything what's up becoming
416
00:36:58,109 --> 00:37:05,489
King one day I think that's a long ways
417
00:37:05,489 --> 00:37:06,859
off don't you
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00:37:06,859 --> 00:37:09,239
besides you know by that time they might
419
00:37:09,239 --> 00:37:14,420
have done away with us completely the
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00:37:14,420 --> 00:37:19,069
monarchy that is that's highly unlikely
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00:37:19,069 --> 00:37:24,329
if I do become great and when you become
422
00:37:24,329 --> 00:37:32,130
I think that I would like to serve an
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00:37:32,130 --> 00:37:37,140
entirely different way never would I sit
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on the throne or wear a crown my mother
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once told me that if ever she would be a
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00:37:45,509 --> 00:37:50,549
queen she wants be a queen in people's
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00:37:50,549 --> 00:37:54,119
hearts I would like to be the people's
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00:37:54,119 --> 00:38:02,809
King something that they could relate to
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00:38:02,809 --> 00:38:07,709
yes who burns the dinner more times than
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00:38:07,709 --> 00:38:20,099
in Cannes to admit the first time that
431
00:38:20,099 --> 00:38:23,509
you meet Prince Charles on a given day
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00:38:23,630 --> 00:38:25,970
you have to use the highest forms of
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00:38:25,970 --> 00:38:27,380
address which is your royal highness
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00:38:27,380 --> 00:38:29,510
and that's same for Camilla and then
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00:38:29,510 --> 00:38:32,530
after that you use sir or ma'am and
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00:38:32,530 --> 00:38:35,300
don't forget that the women has to see
437
00:38:35,300 --> 00:38:38,000
it men just got there all I have to do
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00:38:38,000 --> 00:38:43,690
is not peers I've got it easy then
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00:38:43,690 --> 00:39:01,250
[Music]
440
00:39:07,330 --> 00:39:13,060
I'm very pleased it's meat here
441
00:39:13,060 --> 00:39:18,230
lovely to meet you and pleased to meet
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00:39:18,230 --> 00:39:20,950
you but I do
443
00:39:25,830 --> 00:39:28,300
I've been telling people this for years
444
00:39:28,300 --> 00:39:29,800
still everyone thought I sounded a bit
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00:39:29,800 --> 00:39:31,810
dark but you see what happened with the
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00:39:31,810 --> 00:39:34,090
drought in Africa a couple of years ago
447
00:39:34,090 --> 00:39:36,880
you have malaria and dengue fever
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00:39:36,880 --> 00:39:38,110
running rampant
449
00:39:38,110 --> 00:39:40,840
it's all a mark of global warming if we
450
00:39:40,840 --> 00:39:43,120
don't do something now the results could
451
00:39:43,120 --> 00:39:46,210
be catastrophic I know it's terrible
452
00:39:46,210 --> 00:39:50,050
so our establishment turn pata pieces
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00:39:50,050 --> 00:39:52,480
whoo we've been trying to introduce a
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00:39:52,480 --> 00:39:55,720
line of eco-friendly products we have
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00:39:55,720 --> 00:40:00,430
our paper lanterns for Halloween and pig
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00:40:00,430 --> 00:40:02,820
streamers fabric bunting it's all
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00:40:02,820 --> 00:40:07,810
completely 100% recyclable that we even
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00:40:07,810 --> 00:40:13,420
do personalized balloting we're trying
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00:40:13,420 --> 00:40:17,130
not to leave our carbon footprint
460
00:40:22,460 --> 00:40:25,040
so I'm boom I'm gonna missus William
461
00:40:25,040 --> 00:40:28,579
while he's away it's under the log so
462
00:40:28,579 --> 00:40:29,660
what are your plans now that you've
463
00:40:29,660 --> 00:40:32,180
graduated oh well I've actually just
464
00:40:32,180 --> 00:40:41,270
been offered a job at jigsaw oh it's a
465
00:40:41,270 --> 00:40:43,339
fashion company I'm um I'm going to be
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00:40:43,339 --> 00:40:47,450
the assistant accessories bye oh that's
467
00:40:47,450 --> 00:40:50,809
wonderful opportunity I've never been
468
00:40:50,809 --> 00:40:53,119
one of the fashion most of my
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00:40:53,119 --> 00:40:54,740
accessories date back to the Victorian
470
00:40:54,740 --> 00:41:03,829
age covered in horsehair well I must say
471
00:41:03,829 --> 00:41:05,930
that's lovely suits you look fabulous
472
00:41:05,930 --> 00:41:07,730
today okay thank you
473
00:41:07,730 --> 00:41:10,270
it took a veritable squadron
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00:41:10,270 --> 00:41:13,910
seamstresses and stylists I'm trying
475
00:41:13,910 --> 00:41:19,369
though in succeeding down it does take a
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00:41:19,369 --> 00:41:21,349
lot to go toe-to-toe with Savile rows
477
00:41:21,349 --> 00:41:26,559
most staff a customer oh not James Bond
478
00:41:37,660 --> 00:41:41,900
come on oh god I almost died when my
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00:41:41,900 --> 00:41:43,250
parents invited your father in could
480
00:41:43,250 --> 00:41:45,970
minute to spend the night
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00:41:46,000 --> 00:41:50,330
okay went brilliantly our families have
482
00:41:50,330 --> 00:41:56,530
much in common both hard-working and
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00:41:56,530 --> 00:42:07,670
both involved in family businesses 95 96
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00:42:07,670 --> 00:42:22,760
97 98 99 100 well done gentlemen you are
485
00:42:22,760 --> 00:42:25,030
now dismissed until Monday morning Oh
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00:42:25,030 --> 00:42:28,660
500 hours
487
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[Music]
488
00:43:13,950 --> 00:00:00,000
it's a great piece
51492
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