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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:11,460 --> 00:00:14,816 MY BEST FRIEND 2 00:01:23,660 --> 00:01:26,860 Directed by Lakis Lazopoulos and Yorgos Lanthimos 3 00:01:26,860 --> 00:01:29,420 My mother said, to be happy in life, 4 00:01:29,660 --> 00:01:34,415 you should have the memory of a goldfish which lasts only 3". 5 00:01:34,860 --> 00:01:38,409 Then it forgets everything. That's why it's always happy. 6 00:01:38,860 --> 00:01:41,613 By the time it realizes it's in a fishbowl... 7 00:01:41,860 --> 00:01:43,418 it's already forgotten it. 8 00:01:43,660 --> 00:01:45,810 Same with my friend, Alekos. 9 00:01:46,060 --> 00:01:48,415 Except for a couple of years... 10 00:01:48,860 --> 00:01:51,420 We've been best friends since we were six. 11 00:01:51,660 --> 00:01:53,810 A hell of a long time. 12 00:02:02,860 --> 00:02:05,215 We want hair here and now! 13 00:02:09,260 --> 00:02:11,615 We want hair here and now! 14 00:02:19,460 --> 00:02:21,815 We want hair here and now! 15 00:02:27,860 --> 00:02:30,010 - What's going on? - Bald men. 16 00:02:30,260 --> 00:02:31,613 They've blocked the road. 17 00:02:31,860 --> 00:02:34,818 - Why? - They want hair here and now. 18 00:02:35,660 --> 00:02:37,412 2:20pm on Monday? 19 00:02:39,460 --> 00:02:41,610 2:25. You'll make it. 20 00:02:43,460 --> 00:02:46,816 - Are they filming a commercial? - And advertise what? 21 00:02:47,060 --> 00:02:49,016 Their reflection, I don't know. 22 00:02:50,860 --> 00:02:54,409 What'd ya say? I've got you on wide-angle. 23 00:02:54,860 --> 00:02:57,818 - Lf I miss my plane!... - Don't shout. 24 00:02:58,060 --> 00:03:00,415 Just trying to make up the distance. 25 00:03:01,660 --> 00:03:05,619 While we're waiting, would you like a bergamot? 26 00:03:06,460 --> 00:03:08,416 - Bergamot? - European! 27 00:03:12,460 --> 00:03:16,214 My company gave me this 3-day trip to Paris. 28 00:03:19,660 --> 00:03:23,619 And I'm not missing it because of any bald guy. 29 00:03:24,460 --> 00:03:28,419 - Can't eat anymore. - I'll eat it. 30 00:03:28,660 --> 00:03:31,015 I don't see us movin'... 31 00:03:34,860 --> 00:03:37,215 - You'll make it. - So long. 32 00:03:42,860 --> 00:03:44,213 You won't make it. 33 00:04:10,460 --> 00:04:12,815 - Tell me I made it. - Unfortunately... 34 00:04:13,060 --> 00:04:16,211 "Unfortunately." You say it so beautifully. 35 00:04:21,660 --> 00:04:25,016 It's all your fault! Don't you "Was?" me! 36 00:04:25,260 --> 00:04:26,818 Where's your hair? 37 00:04:44,420 --> 00:04:46,172 Oh, God! 38 00:04:58,660 --> 00:05:00,616 I ripped it out! 39 00:05:31,860 --> 00:05:33,816 - You're the boss. - I'm the boss. 40 00:05:34,660 --> 00:05:36,412 - You're the king. - I'm the king. 41 00:05:38,060 --> 00:05:39,812 - You're a horse. - I'm a horse. 42 00:05:40,060 --> 00:05:43,416 - No, I'm a horse. - And I'm your black rider... 43 00:05:43,660 --> 00:05:46,811 galloping into your dark little forest. 44 00:05:58,860 --> 00:06:01,010 I'll stuff this little pussy. 45 00:06:20,860 --> 00:06:22,816 - He's here, Mom. - I'm here. 46 00:06:23,060 --> 00:06:26,814 - Where are the others? - He's my only friend. 47 00:06:27,460 --> 00:06:29,018 What's it to you? 48 00:06:29,660 --> 00:06:33,619 I cooked all this food! Who's going to eat it! 49 00:06:34,060 --> 00:06:35,209 We will. 50 00:06:41,460 --> 00:06:45,214 - Can I eat the candle? - Sure! 51 00:06:47,460 --> 00:06:48,609 Our song! 52 00:07:30,860 --> 00:07:34,819 I'll need a by-pass! I'll blow up this pussy. 53 00:07:35,660 --> 00:07:37,810 Now, the 2nd round of talks... 54 00:07:38,060 --> 00:07:40,415 I'm Onan Afnan and you're the Middle East. 55 00:07:40,660 --> 00:07:44,209 - I'm Africa. - What do you see in the desert? 56 00:07:44,460 --> 00:07:46,815 - Cactus. - How many? 57 00:07:47,660 --> 00:07:50,220 1,2,3,4, 5,7,13,14... 58 00:07:55,660 --> 00:07:58,220 - What're you thinking? - What time do the shops close? 59 00:07:58,460 --> 00:07:59,813 Count! Count! 60 00:08:29,260 --> 00:08:30,613 Am I disturbing you? 61 00:08:35,660 --> 00:08:37,013 Am I disturbing you? 62 00:08:37,260 --> 00:08:40,616 - Constantine? - So you remember my name? 63 00:08:40,860 --> 00:08:43,215 I was drunk. I didn't know what I was doing. 64 00:08:45,260 --> 00:08:48,411 - Me, too. - So you fuck your pal's wife? 65 00:08:48,660 --> 00:08:51,811 - You know how it is... - I'm learning. 66 00:08:53,660 --> 00:08:55,616 Where's my shirt, dammit? 67 00:09:00,260 --> 00:09:01,818 I should've let you leave. 68 00:09:02,060 --> 00:09:04,620 Your residence permit's expiring. 69 00:09:04,860 --> 00:09:06,418 Cut it out, you jerk! 70 00:09:07,260 --> 00:09:08,613 - Alekos... - What? 71 00:09:08,860 --> 00:09:12,409 - Beat it. Some other time. - Listen. I love this woman. 72 00:09:13,460 --> 00:09:16,611 I love him too. I'm crazy about him. 73 00:09:17,060 --> 00:09:19,415 He screws me like you never have. 74 00:09:19,660 --> 00:09:21,260 He screws me like you never have. He screws me... 75 00:09:21,260 --> 00:09:22,818 Okay, I get it! 76 00:09:23,260 --> 00:09:27,014 He screws you like I never have. 77 00:09:27,260 --> 00:09:28,409 Never! 78 00:09:31,460 --> 00:09:33,610 - What's that? - A knife. 79 00:09:34,060 --> 00:09:37,018 - What're you going to do? - This has got to end! 80 00:09:38,060 --> 00:09:39,618 Take one, baby. 81 00:09:43,060 --> 00:09:46,416 Thursday's our 6th wedding anniversary. 82 00:09:46,860 --> 00:09:49,420 I'll be a Greek citizen... 83 00:09:50,260 --> 00:09:52,216 I don't need you anymore. 84 00:09:56,460 --> 00:09:59,611 He went to Paris and I never heard from him again. 85 00:10:00,260 --> 00:10:02,216 Constantine was my whole life. 86 00:10:10,860 --> 00:10:12,612 He was my best friend. 87 00:10:12,860 --> 00:10:17,615 If something's happened to him, I won't be able to bear it! 88 00:10:20,860 --> 00:10:22,009 That's all. 89 00:10:25,260 --> 00:10:27,216 I think we're missing a leg. 90 00:10:27,460 --> 00:10:29,815 The left one's here. Must be the right. 91 00:10:31,060 --> 00:10:33,415 - The mountain's big. - And the leg's small. 92 00:10:40,860 --> 00:10:42,213 Good evening. 93 00:10:43,860 --> 00:10:47,614 - May they always be remembered. - I found it! 94 00:10:51,660 --> 00:10:53,616 Size 42. Right. That's it. 95 00:10:53,860 --> 00:10:56,215 We don't want a leg from another murder. 96 00:10:57,260 --> 00:11:00,411 Bring the head, I want him intact. 97 00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:03,060 He shouldn't feel that something's missing. 98 00:11:03,060 --> 00:11:05,016 Why didn't we just throw him in the sea? 99 00:11:05,260 --> 00:11:08,411 This is his favorite mountain, the one with the antennas. 100 00:11:08,860 --> 00:11:12,614 He said you could speak to the whole world from here. 101 00:11:12,860 --> 00:11:14,009 So, speak! 102 00:11:17,060 --> 00:11:18,413 Goodbye, pal. 103 00:11:29,860 --> 00:11:31,612 Have you seen the damn lighter? 104 00:11:54,260 --> 00:11:56,012 Where the hell...? 105 00:12:13,460 --> 00:12:15,018 Where could that lighter be? 106 00:12:15,260 --> 00:12:18,013 Don't know. I left it here. I stepped on some gum. 107 00:12:18,260 --> 00:12:20,615 Constantine throws it everywhere. 108 00:12:21,060 --> 00:12:22,618 The only time he doesn't chew is when he's not well. 109 00:12:22,860 --> 00:12:24,418 I'm out of here. 110 00:12:31,860 --> 00:12:35,409 A woman? I can tell. You're in bad shape! 111 00:12:36,260 --> 00:12:38,012 Don't go stay with your mother. 112 00:12:38,260 --> 00:12:40,615 Mothers are the worst after a breakup. 113 00:12:41,060 --> 00:12:42,618 "I told you so!" 114 00:12:47,460 --> 00:12:49,610 Not in the state you're in. 115 00:12:50,460 --> 00:12:52,416 How about a nail clipper? 116 00:12:53,060 --> 00:12:56,416 Sure... as long as it cuts. 117 00:12:58,260 --> 00:13:01,809 My fucking cement shares! Climb, dammit! 118 00:13:06,260 --> 00:13:08,216 Are you going to use the whole bottle. 119 00:13:08,460 --> 00:13:13,011 I told you to change cologne. I can't hide the smell. 120 00:13:14,060 --> 00:13:15,812 Why am I so sexy? 121 00:13:18,060 --> 00:13:22,611 3 days, 125,000. Unlimited mileage. 122 00:13:23,060 --> 00:13:24,618 That's how far I want to go. 123 00:13:25,060 --> 00:13:27,210 Our phone numbers. Your keys. 124 00:13:27,460 --> 00:13:29,815 If you need anything, anytime... 125 00:13:30,060 --> 00:13:31,209 I'll manage. 126 00:13:32,660 --> 00:13:36,414 - Th... the signal light. - Th... th... the key. 127 00:13:40,860 --> 00:13:43,010 You'd think I'd been fucked by Dracula! 128 00:13:55,660 --> 00:13:56,809 What now? 129 00:14:04,060 --> 00:14:05,618 OK, Dora, bye. 130 00:14:08,260 --> 00:14:11,411 - Good afternoon, Alekos. - My damn mobile battery's dead. 131 00:14:11,660 --> 00:14:14,618 It's your mobile battery, not a pacemaker's. 132 00:14:15,460 --> 00:14:17,610 This chair relaxes me. 133 00:14:18,860 --> 00:14:20,816 - Now I feel calm. - Are you sure? 134 00:14:21,060 --> 00:14:24,018 Any food? My feet hurt. I've got to take up tennis again. 135 00:14:24,260 --> 00:14:27,218 - Did Constantine call? - Not while I was here. 136 00:14:28,660 --> 00:14:32,619 My damn back. I hurt it trying to open a window. 137 00:14:33,260 --> 00:14:37,014 - Was the view worth it? - You know my office view. 138 00:14:37,260 --> 00:14:40,218 - You were at work? - Where else? 139 00:14:41,460 --> 00:14:43,416 Do I win a prize for the right answer? 140 00:14:43,660 --> 00:14:47,016 - What's for dinner? - Yesterday's leftovers. 141 00:14:47,260 --> 00:14:49,216 Nothing from the day before yesterday? 142 00:14:51,660 --> 00:14:53,616 Don't touch me, don't touch me. 143 00:14:54,060 --> 00:14:55,812 I stink. I have to shower. 144 00:14:56,060 --> 00:14:58,415 Am I wrong or have you changed your cologne? 145 00:15:00,460 --> 00:15:03,060 You mean there's none of that spinach pie left? 146 00:15:03,060 --> 00:15:05,016 Why hasn't he called? 147 00:15:05,860 --> 00:15:07,612 And you're wrong. 148 00:15:07,860 --> 00:15:10,818 She's got a nose like Cyrano de Bergerac! 149 00:15:18,060 --> 00:15:20,415 Why does that cologne remind me of something? 150 00:15:20,660 --> 00:15:23,811 You say something, dear? I can't hear you. 151 00:15:27,460 --> 00:15:29,815 You're so cute today, Pinocchio. 152 00:15:35,260 --> 00:15:37,012 Yes, you're right. 153 00:15:38,060 --> 00:15:39,209 Divorce him. 154 00:15:40,460 --> 00:15:43,611 The kids can't go on living in this kind of situation. 155 00:15:46,060 --> 00:15:47,209 The usual. 156 00:15:48,060 --> 00:15:49,812 I've saved a little money. 157 00:15:50,060 --> 00:15:52,415 No! I definitely want to open a gym. 158 00:15:52,660 --> 00:15:53,809 Definitely! 159 00:15:54,460 --> 00:15:57,611 When I get my citizenship everything will be different. 160 00:15:58,460 --> 00:16:00,416 I'm really interested in this work. 161 00:16:00,660 --> 00:16:02,218 Not Constantine. 162 00:16:02,860 --> 00:16:06,011 The phone's ringing. It must be my husband calling from Paris. 163 00:16:09,060 --> 00:16:10,812 Hi, darling. Have you arrived? 164 00:16:11,060 --> 00:16:14,211 Yes, darling, I just left the hotel. 165 00:16:15,660 --> 00:16:17,810 - The weather? - The weather's fine. 166 00:16:18,260 --> 00:16:20,615 - How's Paris? - Wonderful. 167 00:16:23,660 --> 00:16:28,211 I'm at the Champs Elysees. I can see the Arc de Triomphe. 168 00:16:30,660 --> 00:16:33,015 - Don't forget my perfume. - Yes. 169 00:16:33,260 --> 00:16:34,818 - Who's there? - Some French people. 170 00:16:35,260 --> 00:16:37,410 You haven't found a French woman have you? 171 00:16:37,660 --> 00:16:40,618 Are you kidding? I'm not like that, darling. 172 00:16:41,460 --> 00:16:45,612 The battery's running out. I'II... I'II... fuck you! 173 00:16:49,260 --> 00:16:50,818 Did she fall for it? 174 00:16:51,060 --> 00:16:54,416 Yes, thanks. I really appreciate this. 175 00:16:58,060 --> 00:17:02,019 - Dumb women. - Dumb men. 176 00:17:15,260 --> 00:17:18,013 - A double hotdog. - With everything? 177 00:17:18,260 --> 00:17:20,216 Yes, just hold the onion. 178 00:17:37,660 --> 00:17:39,810 - It won't fit two. - Oh, it will. 179 00:17:40,060 --> 00:17:44,611 - This particular roll will. - You know something I don't. 180 00:17:45,260 --> 00:17:49,014 You know, I did ballet in my youth. 181 00:17:52,060 --> 00:17:54,210 I'm thinking of taking it up now... 182 00:17:54,460 --> 00:17:57,213 otherwise I don't see myself making it. 183 00:17:57,660 --> 00:17:59,616 This reminds me of something. 184 00:18:04,060 --> 00:18:05,209 Let's go. 185 00:18:07,660 --> 00:18:10,618 Look towards the light, over there. 186 00:18:10,860 --> 00:18:13,818 Good! Lift the ice-cream higher. 187 00:18:16,260 --> 00:18:19,411 That's great. Now towards the light. 188 00:18:36,060 --> 00:18:38,016 - You first. - No, you. 189 00:18:38,660 --> 00:18:40,218 We've been here for hours. I'm freezing. 190 00:18:40,460 --> 00:18:42,416 The others have been in and out already. 191 00:18:42,660 --> 00:18:44,412 - What if I get stuck? - What d'you mean? 192 00:18:44,660 --> 00:18:47,015 I saw two dogs doing it yesterday and they got stuck... 193 00:18:47,460 --> 00:18:50,213 and everyone laughed. What if I get stuck? 194 00:18:50,860 --> 00:18:54,011 - Want to hear my theory? - Want to hear mine? 195 00:18:55,260 --> 00:18:59,219 - Lf I get stuck... - First of all, you don't bark. 196 00:19:00,460 --> 00:19:03,816 And second, I'll come and unstick you. 197 00:19:06,660 --> 00:19:07,809 - Ready? - Yes. 198 00:19:09,260 --> 00:19:10,409 Charge! 199 00:19:17,260 --> 00:19:19,012 When I come, what do I shout? 200 00:19:19,260 --> 00:19:21,820 "Charge," I don't know, or "I'm coming, I'm coming!" 201 00:19:26,260 --> 00:19:28,615 Why shout it, if I'm doing it? 202 00:19:28,860 --> 00:19:30,418 They'll think I'm an idiot. 203 00:19:31,660 --> 00:19:34,618 Well, boys, what's it gonna be? 204 00:19:35,260 --> 00:19:38,411 - Where's the girl? - I'm the girl. 205 00:19:38,860 --> 00:19:40,009 You? 206 00:19:50,060 --> 00:19:51,618 - Where are you going? - Mom! 207 00:19:51,860 --> 00:19:56,012 Get back! You're useless! You've made a fool of me! 208 00:19:56,460 --> 00:19:58,815 Your friend will ruin you! Get back! 209 00:20:09,460 --> 00:20:11,815 - Hello? - Hello, who is it? 210 00:20:13,860 --> 00:20:15,816 Is that you, Panayotis? 211 00:20:17,260 --> 00:20:18,818 No, I'm not Panayotis. 212 00:20:19,060 --> 00:20:21,016 I just wanted to talk to someone. 213 00:20:21,260 --> 00:20:22,818 I dialed this number at random. 214 00:20:23,060 --> 00:20:25,016 I just wanted to say that I'm an idiot - 215 00:20:25,260 --> 00:20:26,818 an accomplished idiot... 216 00:20:27,060 --> 00:20:29,813 and that my best friend is screwing my wife. 217 00:20:30,060 --> 00:20:31,812 I just had to tell someone. 218 00:20:32,260 --> 00:20:37,015 Get some sleep, dear. It's been ten years. Forget the slut! 219 00:20:37,860 --> 00:20:39,816 Hey pal, you a pilot? 220 00:20:40,060 --> 00:20:41,812 If you're not, can you do me a favor? 221 00:20:42,060 --> 00:20:43,618 Can you give me your phone number? 222 00:20:43,860 --> 00:20:45,009 Asshole! 223 00:20:48,660 --> 00:20:51,618 - Move it! I'll explain later. - Where are we going? 224 00:20:54,060 --> 00:20:55,015 Get back here! 225 00:20:55,260 --> 00:20:57,820 I forgot my keys, but I won't go back anyway. 226 00:20:58,060 --> 00:21:00,813 - Will I go back? - Got a light? 227 00:21:02,260 --> 00:21:03,818 Just a minute! 228 00:21:04,460 --> 00:21:07,611 - Do we know each other? - A light! 229 00:21:08,660 --> 00:21:11,413 Where are you going? Are you married? D'you have a job? 230 00:21:11,660 --> 00:21:13,810 - Did it light OK? - It's fine. 231 00:21:14,060 --> 00:21:18,019 I'm not well. Let's walk. My nerves are on edge. 232 00:21:18,260 --> 00:21:21,013 I'm shaking - but I won't cry. 233 00:21:22,260 --> 00:21:24,410 If I don't walk right now... 234 00:21:25,260 --> 00:21:27,820 Can I lock the car? Shall I drive you somewhere? 235 00:21:28,060 --> 00:21:30,210 I can't sit still right now! 236 00:21:31,860 --> 00:21:33,816 - Venia. - Constantine. 237 00:21:34,860 --> 00:21:37,420 - We've made a deal, right? - With...? 238 00:21:37,860 --> 00:21:40,010 - The asshole, who else! - Calm down. 239 00:21:40,260 --> 00:21:42,615 - I'm calm. - Lf you say so. 240 00:21:43,660 --> 00:21:46,811 I'll tell you the whole story. Tell me if I'm unreasonable. 241 00:21:47,460 --> 00:21:51,009 You're killing me! Go ahead, take my fucking stripes, too! 242 00:21:51,660 --> 00:21:54,618 That's all you have to say? Why're you pressuring me? 243 00:21:56,260 --> 00:22:00,412 You're choking me! I don't know which way to turn. 244 00:22:00,660 --> 00:22:02,218 What did I do wrong? 245 00:22:02,460 --> 00:22:06,009 I took care of all of you! Even that bum your brother! 246 00:22:06,860 --> 00:22:08,816 You think I'm made of money? 247 00:22:09,060 --> 00:22:12,416 - Don't you come near me! - I oughta belt you one! 248 00:22:12,660 --> 00:22:15,413 You leaving? You wanna leave? 249 00:22:16,060 --> 00:22:17,209 Shut up! 250 00:22:36,460 --> 00:22:38,610 Didn't I tell you, not more than 6? 251 00:22:39,860 --> 00:22:41,612 Didn't I? I did. 252 00:22:42,660 --> 00:22:47,017 - 6,8, it's all the same. - 8, 12, 20. Why not an army? 253 00:22:48,060 --> 00:22:49,209 What army? 254 00:22:51,660 --> 00:22:54,413 We said we were gonna maintain certain standards. 255 00:22:55,060 --> 00:22:58,211 Not more than 6. Didn't we agree? 256 00:22:59,660 --> 00:23:00,809 We agreed. 257 00:23:03,060 --> 00:23:05,016 Where are you going? 258 00:23:05,260 --> 00:23:08,616 I got my dignity - my fucking dignity. 259 00:23:09,660 --> 00:23:12,015 You're not going to walk all over it. 260 00:23:15,460 --> 00:23:18,213 Didn't you know my problem with the pilot? 261 00:23:19,860 --> 00:23:23,409 You knew it, but you brought him anyway. 262 00:23:23,860 --> 00:23:26,010 I swear I didn't know. 263 00:23:26,660 --> 00:23:30,619 Don't go! You're not gonna blow this marriage. 264 00:23:33,860 --> 00:23:37,614 - I'll blow it sky high! - My love... 265 00:23:38,260 --> 00:23:40,216 - Asshole! - My love... 266 00:23:40,860 --> 00:23:44,216 See, I have no problem with group sex, but... 267 00:23:44,460 --> 00:23:48,009 - Not more than 6. - Yes, us and 4 others. 268 00:23:48,660 --> 00:23:52,619 It doesn't matter whether they're men or women... 269 00:23:53,260 --> 00:23:55,820 As long as there are 4... and no pilots. 270 00:23:56,060 --> 00:23:58,415 I feel I'm suffocating on planes. 271 00:23:58,860 --> 00:24:02,819 When someone's doing it to you, and says he's a pilot... 272 00:24:03,060 --> 00:24:06,018 I just can't take it. I lose it. 273 00:24:06,260 --> 00:24:10,412 Like the plane door's closing on me and I can't function. 274 00:24:10,660 --> 00:24:13,811 - I shouldn't ask, you say... - But you ask. 275 00:24:14,060 --> 00:24:16,415 He's screwing you. Shouldn't you know his line of work? 276 00:24:16,660 --> 00:24:19,015 - It's... - Just curiousity. 277 00:24:19,660 --> 00:24:23,619 Pilot. It's like he's saying: "Our relationship is over." 278 00:24:23,860 --> 00:24:26,420 Tell me if I'm being unreasonable. 279 00:24:26,660 --> 00:24:29,811 I didn't say I'm a pilot. I said I wanted to be one. 280 00:24:30,460 --> 00:24:33,611 You believe all these years, I've only been with my wife? 281 00:24:33,860 --> 00:24:36,010 Let me see. I believe you. 282 00:24:36,260 --> 00:24:39,013 - What's your sign again? - Leo. 283 00:24:41,460 --> 00:24:44,213 - What did you say? - Group sex is like Marxism. 284 00:24:44,460 --> 00:24:46,212 All for one and one for all. 285 00:24:46,460 --> 00:24:50,419 You meet different people, scientists. You learn things. 286 00:24:52,060 --> 00:24:56,417 I learnt the term "bioclimatic home" during group sex. 287 00:24:56,660 --> 00:24:59,015 - Is that so? - Would you... 288 00:25:03,860 --> 00:25:05,418 And what did you do when you saw them? 289 00:25:05,860 --> 00:25:07,418 I'll tell you. 290 00:25:09,460 --> 00:25:12,611 First of all, I'm afraid of heights. 291 00:26:41,260 --> 00:26:42,818 Excuse me, sir. 292 00:26:46,260 --> 00:26:47,818 You can have 'em. 293 00:26:57,060 --> 00:26:58,209 It's me. 294 00:27:01,460 --> 00:27:04,611 I jumped over to the next balcony. I wanted to think. 295 00:27:04,860 --> 00:27:07,818 What's there to think about? They were fucking. 296 00:27:10,260 --> 00:27:12,410 See, you avoid that with group sex. 297 00:27:12,660 --> 00:27:14,218 You don't worry about your friend, 298 00:27:14,660 --> 00:27:16,013 because everyone does it together. 299 00:27:16,260 --> 00:27:17,409 Good point. 300 00:27:18,860 --> 00:27:20,612 - What're you doing tomorrow? - You scare me. 301 00:27:21,060 --> 00:27:23,415 I'm supposed to be in Paris for the next 2 days. 302 00:27:23,660 --> 00:27:25,616 Great. Tomorrow you're coming with me. 303 00:27:25,860 --> 00:27:27,816 I'm not good with groups. Forget it. 304 00:27:28,060 --> 00:27:31,211 - No silly, don't you trust me? - Frankly, no. 305 00:27:31,460 --> 00:27:33,815 You'll come. Let's go to a hotel and get some sleep. 306 00:27:34,060 --> 00:27:36,210 My feet are killing me. You'll pay the bill. 307 00:27:36,460 --> 00:27:39,020 Okay, but let's get my car. 308 00:27:40,460 --> 00:27:43,020 Can you imitate an elephant? I can. 309 00:27:47,060 --> 00:27:48,209 I can't. 310 00:27:48,460 --> 00:27:51,611 So the black guy undresses and his "hose" pops out, 311 00:27:51,860 --> 00:27:53,816 I'm spread out like this, 312 00:27:54,060 --> 00:27:57,211 the Chinaman sees it and is blown away. 313 00:27:57,460 --> 00:28:00,213 It was endless, like the Great Wall of China. 314 00:28:00,460 --> 00:28:02,212 Have a nice stay. 315 00:28:03,260 --> 00:28:05,216 I'm talkin' to you. 316 00:28:05,860 --> 00:28:10,411 - Was that in New York City? - Zuberi City last year. Great! 317 00:28:12,060 --> 00:28:14,620 - I'm worn out. - A real slut! 318 00:28:15,060 --> 00:28:18,211 The asshole will be looking for me. 319 00:28:19,660 --> 00:28:22,811 - Do you like your life? - I hadn't thought about it. 320 00:28:23,060 --> 00:28:26,609 Looks like you've put everything on hold. 321 00:28:26,860 --> 00:28:30,819 I love the asshole. We met at a demonstration. 322 00:28:32,060 --> 00:28:35,211 They were leaving Iran, going into Irak, I can't remember... 323 00:28:35,460 --> 00:28:37,815 He was a cop and I enjoyed being beaten up. 324 00:28:38,060 --> 00:28:40,016 - In Iran? - No, silly. 325 00:28:41,260 --> 00:28:44,411 I felt so guilty. I was leftist with a communist father. 326 00:28:46,260 --> 00:28:50,219 - It takes a while to get over. - You're telling me! 327 00:28:50,460 --> 00:28:52,212 Where are we going tomorrow? 328 00:28:53,260 --> 00:28:56,809 All of Athens spread out before us. I'm hungry. 329 00:28:57,060 --> 00:28:59,210 - I'll get something. - Forget it. 330 00:29:59,660 --> 00:30:01,810 All dressed up for the office move? 331 00:30:02,060 --> 00:30:04,620 No, we're moving offices on Saturday. 332 00:30:05,060 --> 00:30:08,211 I've got an appointment... it's business. 333 00:30:09,460 --> 00:30:13,419 Big business... Company insurance. 334 00:30:14,060 --> 00:30:17,814 It's a transport company. They move animals. 335 00:30:19,260 --> 00:30:21,410 Animals. Well, that's something new. 336 00:30:21,660 --> 00:30:24,811 Why? There are all kinds of companies. 337 00:30:25,060 --> 00:30:28,211 This one moves an animal from here to there. 338 00:30:29,660 --> 00:30:32,015 Sure, they can't leave it in the same place. 339 00:30:32,460 --> 00:30:34,610 Are you hiding something, Alekos? 340 00:30:35,660 --> 00:30:38,260 I don't have a girlfriend. I swear on the coffee... 341 00:30:38,260 --> 00:30:39,613 I'm about to drink. 342 00:30:43,860 --> 00:30:46,215 - Where are we going? - Hope it's the right roof. 343 00:30:46,460 --> 00:30:47,609 Are we gonna hang clothes? 344 00:30:47,860 --> 00:30:49,418 - Wait! - For what? 345 00:30:54,460 --> 00:30:58,612 We can only understand ourselves by speaking up... 346 00:31:02,260 --> 00:31:04,820 Constantine, this is Stella. 347 00:31:05,260 --> 00:31:07,820 Meet the members of the group therapy. 348 00:31:22,660 --> 00:31:24,412 Christos, are you still here? 349 00:31:24,660 --> 00:31:27,015 I've left, got away, escaped... 350 00:31:27,460 --> 00:31:32,011 Tonight I feel like Cuba with my cigars, my convertibles... 351 00:31:32,460 --> 00:31:35,611 But you know you can't live in a country without souvlaki. 352 00:31:35,860 --> 00:31:37,213 I'll tell you a great joke... 353 00:31:37,460 --> 00:31:41,009 Christ is playing tennis with Naomi Campbell... 354 00:31:41,260 --> 00:31:45,219 - Give me a break. - Coming to my cousin's bar? 355 00:31:45,460 --> 00:31:47,815 Tonight's an anniversary... 356 00:31:48,060 --> 00:31:49,413 ...of the first time you jerked off? 357 00:31:49,660 --> 00:31:52,220 - Such talk! - Oops! I'm off. 358 00:31:53,260 --> 00:31:56,218 Theoni, any e-mails from the apostle Paul? 359 00:31:56,460 --> 00:31:58,212 How are you, Mr. Alekos? 360 00:31:58,460 --> 00:32:00,815 When you got the truck waiting outside... 361 00:32:01,260 --> 00:32:05,014 and Belgium's expecting its apricots at 8:13 on the dot... 362 00:32:05,260 --> 00:32:07,216 you can't have an affair with the woman you met... 363 00:32:07,460 --> 00:32:09,212 when you stopped for a quick snack. 364 00:32:09,460 --> 00:32:12,611 I like to take my time with women. 365 00:32:14,260 --> 00:32:16,615 Let's get back to Harry... 366 00:32:17,460 --> 00:32:21,419 My Mom didn't like any of the 63 women I took home... 367 00:32:21,660 --> 00:32:24,811 only Nina, who wanted to marry me. 368 00:32:26,860 --> 00:32:30,614 But Mom said a winter wedding was unheard of. 369 00:32:30,860 --> 00:32:35,217 "What mother would wear a coat to her son's wedding?" 370 00:32:36,060 --> 00:32:39,211 I want to get married, but I can't. 371 00:32:41,260 --> 00:32:43,410 You call that an accident? 372 00:32:43,660 --> 00:32:46,413 I've got 8 stitches in my ear! 373 00:32:46,660 --> 00:32:50,209 Because your wife hit you over the head. 374 00:32:51,660 --> 00:32:53,260 Insure me against my wife then. 375 00:32:53,260 --> 00:32:56,809 - Fire, accident and wife. - It's... life. 376 00:32:58,860 --> 00:33:00,612 Your phone's always busy, I've lost you. 377 00:33:00,860 --> 00:33:05,012 When I came here, I was convinced... 378 00:33:05,260 --> 00:33:08,616 I was the reincarnation of King Jugurtha. 379 00:33:10,060 --> 00:33:13,211 I'd go to the toilet and wonder... 380 00:33:13,460 --> 00:33:16,816 how would King Jugartha sit? Like this? 381 00:33:19,060 --> 00:33:21,016 Like this... like this. 382 00:33:21,260 --> 00:33:24,013 Have you closed "shop" downstairs? 383 00:33:24,260 --> 00:33:26,820 I'm closing now... Hold on. 384 00:33:31,260 --> 00:33:34,218 Hi, Daphne. I'll call you back. 385 00:33:37,260 --> 00:33:39,820 I've got time to "shop" at 10. 386 00:33:40,060 --> 00:33:42,415 Now I've got to go shopping with your wife. 387 00:33:42,660 --> 00:33:45,413 I'm walking on a tighrope here. 388 00:33:45,660 --> 00:33:49,619 Tonight, I'm exterminating your little "shop." 389 00:33:53,260 --> 00:33:57,014 - All-night shopping? - Something's bothering her. 390 00:33:57,260 --> 00:34:00,809 - Did you like it? - The roof therapy? Fine. 391 00:34:01,660 --> 00:34:05,619 In the US, everyone's being psychoanalyzed on rooftops. 392 00:34:05,860 --> 00:34:07,612 You know, roof therapy... 393 00:34:07,860 --> 00:34:09,816 I'm not ashamed to shout out my problem. 394 00:34:10,060 --> 00:34:12,415 - I have to shout now? - Give him some time. 395 00:34:13,460 --> 00:34:17,009 - On tomorrow's roof. - Okay. 396 00:34:18,060 --> 00:34:21,018 I've got premature ejaculation! 397 00:34:23,460 --> 00:34:26,213 - Just the two of you? No kids? - No. 398 00:34:26,460 --> 00:34:28,416 - Only married? - Only. 399 00:34:29,260 --> 00:34:33,219 Times have changed. Here today, there tomorrow. 400 00:34:34,260 --> 00:34:36,820 - The kitchen? - Let's see the bedroom... 401 00:34:41,260 --> 00:34:44,218 The bathroom is rather cramped. 402 00:34:46,460 --> 00:34:49,213 I don't have a permanent relationship right now. 403 00:34:49,460 --> 00:34:52,611 - The garden is large. - Yes, large. 404 00:34:53,660 --> 00:34:55,412 Sign here, please. 405 00:35:00,260 --> 00:35:02,012 Your husband doesn't need to see it, you said. 406 00:35:02,260 --> 00:35:06,219 - No, he doesn't. - OK. You've got my cell number. 407 00:35:27,460 --> 00:35:29,018 Let's see something else. 408 00:35:29,260 --> 00:35:31,012 You're not helping me help you. 409 00:35:31,260 --> 00:35:34,411 - I can imagine it, but can't... - Express it? 410 00:35:34,660 --> 00:35:35,809 That's it. 411 00:35:36,460 --> 00:35:40,009 - The fuchsia does things. - Great things. 412 00:35:40,860 --> 00:35:45,012 Brightens things up, I'd say. Matches our puppies, too. 413 00:35:45,260 --> 00:35:49,811 - You've got fuchsia puppies? - The design on my underpants. 414 00:35:50,260 --> 00:35:53,218 Wrap them up real fancy with ribbons... 415 00:35:53,460 --> 00:35:56,020 and do that thing with the scissors... 416 00:35:56,460 --> 00:35:58,610 And give me 50 of those cheap panties. 417 00:35:58,860 --> 00:36:01,420 - To be torn off! - That's it! 418 00:36:07,860 --> 00:36:12,217 - Stella's great, isn't she? - Yes, she's got something. 419 00:36:13,460 --> 00:36:16,020 And she's a straight talker. 420 00:36:18,860 --> 00:36:22,011 - See you at the hotel! - What's up? 421 00:36:22,260 --> 00:36:24,012 - Boys! - It's Venia! 422 00:36:28,260 --> 00:36:32,811 - Hey, weren't you sailors? - No, you've mixed us up again. 423 00:36:33,660 --> 00:36:35,616 Here you are again! 424 00:36:36,260 --> 00:36:39,616 Easy women, cheap booze and and wild sex in the forest... 425 00:36:39,860 --> 00:36:42,215 - Snap out of it. - I can't take it anymore. 426 00:36:42,460 --> 00:36:45,418 I was with my babe and guess who I saw... 427 00:36:45,660 --> 00:36:49,812 coming out of a house with a guy... Our Constantine's wife. 428 00:36:50,460 --> 00:36:53,418 They're all getting laid, man. 429 00:36:53,660 --> 00:36:56,811 - I'll tell you a great joke... - You just did. I'm laughin'. 430 00:36:57,260 --> 00:36:58,409 I'm off. 431 00:37:16,060 --> 00:37:19,416 - Don't think about it. - He ruled it out completely. 432 00:37:19,660 --> 00:37:22,413 There are millions of other doctors. 433 00:37:22,660 --> 00:37:25,413 People have gone all over the world 434 00:37:25,660 --> 00:37:28,618 to have a child and they did it. 435 00:37:30,060 --> 00:37:31,618 I know how much you wanted one. 436 00:37:31,860 --> 00:37:34,818 It'll happen when it's meant to. 437 00:37:35,860 --> 00:37:38,613 - I love you so much. - How much? 438 00:37:38,860 --> 00:37:40,009 A lot. 439 00:37:47,260 --> 00:37:50,411 Was my baby quiet while I was away? 440 00:37:50,660 --> 00:37:53,015 Were you quiet while I was out? 441 00:37:54,060 --> 00:37:56,210 We have visitors this afternoon. 442 00:37:56,460 --> 00:37:59,020 A man. Now don't be jealous. 443 00:38:01,060 --> 00:38:03,016 He looked handsome. 444 00:38:04,460 --> 00:38:06,416 No, not handsome... 445 00:38:09,260 --> 00:38:10,409 Charming? 446 00:38:40,460 --> 00:38:44,214 THODOROS AN AMOURLIDES PRIVATE IN VESTIG ATOR 447 00:38:49,660 --> 00:38:52,811 Our life revolves around details. 448 00:38:55,460 --> 00:38:58,418 I don't want my friend to worry. 449 00:38:58,860 --> 00:39:00,612 - Constantine? - Yes. 450 00:39:02,660 --> 00:39:06,209 - And the Rumanian woman? - I want evidence. 451 00:39:06,660 --> 00:39:08,616 I want to show him photographs. 452 00:39:08,860 --> 00:39:11,420 Photographs. Front, profile. 453 00:39:11,860 --> 00:39:15,819 I tell it like it is. I'm not tactful. 454 00:39:16,660 --> 00:39:20,414 If she's got him inside her, I'll tell you. 455 00:39:21,260 --> 00:39:24,013 I won't beat around the bush. 456 00:39:24,460 --> 00:39:27,213 Manly stuff. I'm not tactful. 457 00:39:28,460 --> 00:39:30,610 Don't start tonight though. 458 00:39:30,860 --> 00:39:33,613 We'll all be together tonight. 459 00:39:34,060 --> 00:39:36,415 Constantine too. Oh boy. 460 00:39:41,860 --> 00:39:43,009 - Bye. - Bye. 461 00:39:49,260 --> 00:39:51,410 - Constantine! - Constantine, who? 462 00:39:51,660 --> 00:39:54,811 I found him after all these years. 463 00:39:56,260 --> 00:39:58,615 I looked him straight in the eye but he didn't recognize me. 464 00:39:58,860 --> 00:40:01,613 It says "Alekos Zaharopoulos" here. 465 00:40:01,860 --> 00:40:05,819 He's the one who left. I'm talking about Constantine. 466 00:40:06,060 --> 00:40:10,815 I told you about him. We were classmates. Then we lost touch. 467 00:40:11,460 --> 00:40:13,018 My first love! 468 00:40:17,460 --> 00:40:19,018 I need a drink. 469 00:40:20,460 --> 00:40:22,018 I wanted to cry. 470 00:40:25,860 --> 00:40:28,818 And I'm impersonating Thodoros! 471 00:40:32,460 --> 00:40:33,609 Why? Why? 472 00:40:36,660 --> 00:40:40,209 Because Thodoros died... and just as well! 473 00:40:40,860 --> 00:40:44,011 - Calm down. - Why am I impersonating him? 474 00:40:44,260 --> 00:40:47,411 We had to keep this office. Everyone trusted him. 475 00:40:47,660 --> 00:40:50,015 Yes, but why am I impersonating him? 476 00:40:50,260 --> 00:40:52,012 You've got two fat children. 477 00:40:52,260 --> 00:40:55,013 I could live my life watching him from afar. 478 00:40:55,260 --> 00:40:58,411 Even if I don't marry him, I'll tail him. 479 00:41:01,860 --> 00:41:04,420 Thodoros, you're not Thodoros! 480 00:41:06,060 --> 00:41:08,415 You're Lisa. I'm Lisa. 481 00:41:10,060 --> 00:41:12,016 - Where's Thodoros? - I'm Thodoros. 482 00:41:12,260 --> 00:41:13,613 And I'm Yolanda. 483 00:41:16,460 --> 00:41:18,610 A lot depends on you. 484 00:41:24,660 --> 00:41:26,412 - Good evening. - Good evening. 485 00:41:26,660 --> 00:41:29,015 - It's been a while. - Come in. 486 00:41:33,260 --> 00:41:35,820 - Do you li e it? - It's fine. 487 00:41:37,060 --> 00:41:39,210 It's my friend Katy's apartment. 488 00:41:39,460 --> 00:41:42,213 I guess she paints in her spare time. 489 00:41:42,460 --> 00:41:44,212 I can't draw a thing. 490 00:41:44,460 --> 00:41:46,416 Sure are a lot of paintings. 491 00:41:47,660 --> 00:41:52,211 - Freud. He likes you. - He smells problems. 492 00:41:53,060 --> 00:41:54,209 A whisky. 493 00:41:54,860 --> 00:41:57,613 If it doesn't work, we'll use pills. 494 00:41:57,860 --> 00:42:00,215 I like it that you take me seriously. 495 00:42:00,460 --> 00:42:03,816 So, go on. I'm all ears. 496 00:42:04,700 --> 00:42:06,053 If there is a beginning... 497 00:42:06,260 --> 00:42:09,809 it began 6 years and 10 days ago, on a Wednesday. 498 00:42:10,060 --> 00:42:13,260 She's crazy about you. Crazy, I tell you. 499 00:42:13,260 --> 00:42:14,409 "Who's that gorgeous hunk?" She said. 500 00:42:14,660 --> 00:42:17,015 - She called me gorgeous hunk? - I swear. 501 00:42:17,260 --> 00:42:19,820 May I never clinch another insurance contract! 502 00:42:20,060 --> 00:42:22,813 - A Rumanian goddess. - Rumanian? 503 00:42:23,060 --> 00:42:25,415 So what? She's a goddess. 504 00:42:27,060 --> 00:42:29,620 Did she really say that, Daphne? 505 00:42:29,860 --> 00:42:32,420 Daphne found her a job at the restaurant. 506 00:42:32,660 --> 00:42:34,218 She used to work with me. 507 00:42:34,660 --> 00:42:38,414 But then she had problems with her residence permit. 508 00:42:38,660 --> 00:42:43,415 - She's very nice. - So where did she see me? 509 00:42:44,660 --> 00:42:47,015 Listen, as we're talking... 510 00:42:47,260 --> 00:42:50,809 she says she'd stay here, if she met a Greek man. 511 00:42:51,060 --> 00:42:53,210 So I grab the opportunity and I say... 512 00:42:53,460 --> 00:42:56,213 I have a friend... unmarried. 513 00:42:58,060 --> 00:43:02,212 But she wants to see you, so I show her that holiday snapshot, 514 00:43:02,460 --> 00:43:05,213 - the one of us on the donkey. - You showed her that? 515 00:43:05,460 --> 00:43:07,018 All you can see is you and the donkey. 516 00:43:07,460 --> 00:43:10,611 No, you're in the background, looking at the camera. 517 00:43:10,860 --> 00:43:14,011 "I want to see him," she tells me. 518 00:43:14,260 --> 00:43:16,615 Maybe she'd like me to come with the donkey? 519 00:43:16,860 --> 00:43:19,818 Do you think this will work out? 520 00:43:20,260 --> 00:43:22,615 I had a dream about it, I tell you. 521 00:43:22,860 --> 00:43:27,217 I saw a snowy-white ox and that only means one thing. 522 00:43:28,660 --> 00:43:30,616 - Marriage. - Marriage. 523 00:43:31,660 --> 00:43:36,814 - How did I look on the donkey? - Neat. Now eat your fish. 524 00:43:39,460 --> 00:43:40,609 Go in. 525 00:43:46,260 --> 00:43:49,616 The next day, the ox and his pal went to a restaurant, 526 00:43:50,060 --> 00:43:51,618 which was anything but a restaurant. 527 00:43:51,860 --> 00:43:54,215 Come here! Come back here. 528 00:43:56,060 --> 00:43:58,016 - Where are you going? - I forgot to put on cologne. 529 00:43:58,260 --> 00:44:01,411 Fuck, is that such a problem? Here. 530 00:44:02,660 --> 00:44:05,060 And what's more you didn't say where we're going. 531 00:44:05,060 --> 00:44:06,413 I'm dressed like a catholic priest... 532 00:44:06,660 --> 00:44:08,218 about to bless the outrageous. 533 00:44:08,460 --> 00:44:09,609 Look at me! 534 00:44:10,060 --> 00:44:13,018 We've got big ones. We're not worried. 535 00:44:13,260 --> 00:44:15,820 - Thank you. - You're welcome. 536 00:44:55,060 --> 00:44:57,016 In a week, we were married. 537 00:44:57,260 --> 00:45:00,218 Her residence permit was expiring. 538 00:45:00,460 --> 00:45:04,009 And for six years the marriage was fine? 539 00:45:04,260 --> 00:45:06,410 Sexually, it was fine. 540 00:45:07,260 --> 00:45:09,012 At least, I thought so... 541 00:45:09,260 --> 00:45:12,218 You didn't notice anything in the corner of her eye? 542 00:45:12,460 --> 00:45:16,612 I didn't look, but there was nothing in the middle. 543 00:45:17,460 --> 00:45:19,815 I haven't been to a sexologist, 544 00:45:20,060 --> 00:45:22,210 but isn't 4 times a week okay? 545 00:45:22,460 --> 00:45:26,214 - What if she wanted 10 times? - She never said so. 546 00:45:26,460 --> 00:45:30,214 I'm not saying she went to him for the extra 6. 547 00:45:30,460 --> 00:45:33,213 The reasons are always much deeper. 548 00:45:34,860 --> 00:45:38,819 It never occurred to you that Andrea and Alekos...? 549 00:45:39,060 --> 00:45:40,209 No... no... 550 00:45:45,260 --> 00:45:46,409 Yes. 551 00:45:47,460 --> 00:45:49,815 You don't know when to stop! 552 00:45:50,060 --> 00:45:53,609 You ate your brother's burgers and mine! 553 00:45:54,460 --> 00:45:56,416 You ate 8 servings of french fries! 554 00:45:56,660 --> 00:46:01,211 And you had to top it off with the last of the spaghetti! 555 00:46:04,860 --> 00:46:08,216 - Thank God, we have no kids. - I'd like one. 556 00:46:08,460 --> 00:46:11,020 - What does Andrea say? - No problem. 557 00:46:11,460 --> 00:46:13,018 We haven't taken it seriously yet. 558 00:46:13,260 --> 00:46:14,613 She'd like one very much. 559 00:46:14,860 --> 00:46:16,418 Where are they? 560 00:46:19,660 --> 00:46:22,015 Please bring me the shampoo. 561 00:46:23,660 --> 00:46:24,809 Darling. 562 00:46:28,660 --> 00:46:30,013 Where's Alekos? 563 00:46:30,260 --> 00:46:33,218 Who knows? Probably chasing an octopus. 564 00:46:33,460 --> 00:46:35,416 - What's this? - What? 565 00:46:36,460 --> 00:46:37,609 Here, here. 566 00:46:43,060 --> 00:46:45,210 I... um... sat on a rock... 567 00:46:45,460 --> 00:46:47,018 I felt something. 568 00:46:47,260 --> 00:46:50,616 A little crab must have been there and it bit me. 569 00:46:52,060 --> 00:46:54,415 Give me a kiss, come on. 570 00:47:02,100 --> 00:47:04,455 A crab with a set of human teeth. 571 00:47:04,660 --> 00:47:07,618 If you're in love, crabs have teeth... 572 00:47:07,860 --> 00:47:10,215 and porcupines don't have quills. 573 00:47:10,460 --> 00:47:12,212 - A falling star. - Where? 574 00:47:14,860 --> 00:47:16,816 Well I made a wish. 575 00:47:17,260 --> 00:47:19,615 I don't know if the star heard it. 576 00:47:19,860 --> 00:47:22,010 Are you going to be like this all night? 577 00:47:22,260 --> 00:47:24,615 You haven't eaten a thing. Eat your fish. 578 00:47:30,060 --> 00:47:34,019 So that's why you wanted me to start tomorrow? 579 00:47:35,260 --> 00:47:36,818 He's always been like that. 580 00:47:37,260 --> 00:47:41,014 He once hit on me behind Constantine's back. 581 00:47:47,660 --> 00:47:50,618 Why today? It's our anniversary. 582 00:47:50,860 --> 00:47:54,011 This has been brewing a long time. 583 00:47:56,260 --> 00:47:59,411 What's more I don't feel the same passion, the same love. 584 00:47:59,660 --> 00:48:04,017 This is new. You don't feel the same passion, the same love? 585 00:48:04,460 --> 00:48:07,418 I've decided to talk to Constantine. 586 00:48:07,660 --> 00:48:10,015 - "My friend," I'll say... - Friend, huh? 587 00:48:10,260 --> 00:48:13,218 "I'm screwing your wife." He could be screwing mine. 588 00:48:13,460 --> 00:48:15,860 I don't like that! You're not screwing me! 589 00:48:15,860 --> 00:48:17,612 I'm not a fence, I'm a person! 590 00:48:18,060 --> 00:48:20,210 Why're you shouting? In bed... 591 00:48:20,460 --> 00:48:23,816 This is a table. Knives, forks, plates. 592 00:48:24,460 --> 00:48:26,815 I'm dressed, I'm made-up. 593 00:48:27,260 --> 00:48:29,216 - Am I made-up? - Yes. 594 00:48:30,460 --> 00:48:32,416 I love Constantine. 595 00:48:33,660 --> 00:48:36,413 Let's go. Now. I loathe you... 596 00:48:38,060 --> 00:48:40,016 ...so much. - How much? 597 00:48:40,260 --> 00:48:41,818 As the squere block. 598 00:48:42,060 --> 00:48:43,209 Now! 599 00:48:48,660 --> 00:48:51,618 - Little umbrellas. - I hate them. 600 00:48:51,860 --> 00:48:55,216 I love them. I shouldn't feel bad that I'm keeping you. 601 00:48:55,660 --> 00:48:57,412 Do I look like I mind? 602 00:48:57,660 --> 00:49:00,618 - You didn't finish about... - The love affair? 603 00:49:00,860 --> 00:49:04,409 It was great. I was a student in Germany... 604 00:49:04,660 --> 00:49:06,616 and was vacationing in Greece. 605 00:49:07,260 --> 00:49:10,809 He left along with the summer and I never saw him again. 606 00:49:11,060 --> 00:49:14,416 - His name was Alekos too. - It seems to go with the name. 607 00:49:15,460 --> 00:49:18,020 - What should I do? - Give it time... 608 00:49:18,260 --> 00:49:21,411 What does time know, that I don't? 609 00:49:21,860 --> 00:49:24,613 You'll look back on this one day and laugh. 610 00:49:24,860 --> 00:49:27,215 If I strangled them now, I'd laugh today. 611 00:49:35,260 --> 00:49:38,218 DRIVE IN THE PERVERTED FISHBO WL 612 00:50:04,660 --> 00:50:06,412 What're they doing? Tell me. 613 00:50:09,460 --> 00:50:11,416 Don't I give you a good screw? 614 00:50:11,660 --> 00:50:14,015 That's all you can think of! 615 00:50:14,460 --> 00:50:17,418 Didn't we say I'd be the brutal exterminator today? 616 00:50:17,860 --> 00:50:21,409 Today we'll play another film. "Run, Lola Run." 617 00:50:21,660 --> 00:50:23,810 Where are you going? Get back in here! 618 00:50:25,860 --> 00:50:27,816 Come back, people are looking at us! 619 00:50:28,060 --> 00:50:30,016 They can see us. Come here! 620 00:50:30,260 --> 00:50:31,409 Come here! 621 00:50:33,860 --> 00:50:35,009 Come here! 622 00:50:38,460 --> 00:50:41,611 I can't see a thing. Where are you? 623 00:50:43,660 --> 00:50:44,809 What do you want? 624 00:50:45,060 --> 00:50:48,211 - You've got someone else. - I want to break up. 625 00:50:48,460 --> 00:50:51,611 Alright, fine. I'll hear arguements. 626 00:50:52,660 --> 00:50:55,015 What're you staring at? 627 00:51:16,060 --> 00:51:19,211 I've never opened up to a woman before. 628 00:51:19,660 --> 00:51:22,015 I'm impressed with myself. 629 00:51:22,260 --> 00:51:24,216 I've always said everything to Alekos. 630 00:51:24,460 --> 00:51:27,020 It's different talking to a man. 631 00:51:27,460 --> 00:51:30,816 You're not ashamed of telling him that you're a jerk. 632 00:51:31,060 --> 00:51:34,211 You have to tell a man, while a woman knows it. 633 00:51:36,060 --> 00:51:39,211 Why do I do this so well, dammit? 634 00:51:39,660 --> 00:51:41,810 I need an expert to tell me why? 635 00:51:42,060 --> 00:51:46,019 You swore you wouldn't tell Constantine anything. 636 00:51:49,460 --> 00:51:51,815 I'll insure this pussy. 637 00:51:52,700 --> 00:51:55,260 Forward, soldier, on to victory! 638 00:51:56,460 --> 00:52:00,009 Go girls before it starts getting kinky. 639 00:52:00,460 --> 00:52:03,611 - Hey, that's my Vivian! - Bye, Lilian. 640 00:52:13,260 --> 00:52:15,012 What's the matter? 641 00:52:26,060 --> 00:52:29,211 How can you sleep in your helmet? Wake up! 642 00:52:29,460 --> 00:52:31,416 What's happening? Is the enemy here? 643 00:52:31,660 --> 00:52:34,811 You're such a jerk making me strap myself up here. 644 00:52:35,260 --> 00:52:37,615 I told you I'm afraid of heights. You take the top bunk. 645 00:52:38,060 --> 00:52:40,813 Have you been with my Vivian? 646 00:52:42,060 --> 00:52:45,211 Are you kidding? Before I fuck her, 647 00:52:46,060 --> 00:52:49,018 I always ask first: "Are you Lilian or Vivian?" 648 00:52:49,260 --> 00:52:51,410 - What does she answer? - No. 649 00:52:51,660 --> 00:52:54,618 Then why did she ask me where's the mole on my dick? 650 00:52:54,860 --> 00:52:57,613 - So where did it go? - Where do you think? 651 00:52:58,060 --> 00:53:00,016 You're the one with the mole. 652 00:53:00,260 --> 00:53:03,809 Haven't you heard about the twin syndrome? 653 00:53:04,460 --> 00:53:06,610 Whatever one feels, the other feels too. 654 00:53:06,860 --> 00:53:10,011 Mine called me Constantine in bed. 655 00:53:11,060 --> 00:53:13,415 Then she explained it to me scientifically. 656 00:53:14,860 --> 00:53:19,012 Sometimes she asks me how the mole got on my dick. 657 00:53:20,260 --> 00:53:24,219 Those twins will drive us crazy with that mole. 658 00:53:25,660 --> 00:53:28,015 This will really blow you away... 659 00:53:28,260 --> 00:53:32,412 Last time, mine had an orgasm without me even touching her. 660 00:53:33,260 --> 00:53:37,617 Obviously yours was having an orgasm and she felt it. 661 00:53:38,460 --> 00:53:41,418 - On Saturday? - Yes. Go to sleep. 662 00:53:45,260 --> 00:53:48,013 - Sorry, Alekos. - That's okay. 663 00:53:51,460 --> 00:53:55,009 You needed to believe him. You're not so naive. 664 00:53:55,260 --> 00:53:57,410 I'm not, huh? Just pretending? 665 00:54:23,660 --> 00:54:27,209 You come, we screw, you leave. That's no relationship. 666 00:54:27,460 --> 00:54:29,815 Don't we smoke and talk too? 667 00:54:30,060 --> 00:54:33,018 Do we have to talk about saving the seals? 668 00:54:33,260 --> 00:54:36,218 Not only seals, Alekos, not only seals... 669 00:54:36,460 --> 00:54:39,020 There's the sea turtle too. 670 00:54:40,660 --> 00:54:44,209 You only know 50 words: "Baby, you turn me on, 671 00:54:44,460 --> 00:54:46,610 you drive me crazy, you kill me, take it..." 672 00:54:46,860 --> 00:54:49,010 Our relationship can be summed up in 50 words. 673 00:54:49,260 --> 00:54:51,820 50-60 words express passion. That's it. 674 00:54:52,260 --> 00:54:54,615 52 words describe passion. 675 00:54:54,860 --> 00:54:57,215 You don't know basic things about me. 676 00:54:57,460 --> 00:55:01,419 I care about saving the seal, the orangutango. 677 00:55:02,060 --> 00:55:05,018 - Damn that pronunciation! - Saving, in general. 678 00:55:05,260 --> 00:55:08,616 Are you ready to face that they may be madly in love? 679 00:55:09,060 --> 00:55:12,416 Are you kidding? And you're a psychologist! 680 00:55:12,660 --> 00:55:16,619 I care about even the tiniest bug in the Amazon! 681 00:55:20,660 --> 00:55:22,616 But when I see you, 682 00:55:22,860 --> 00:55:27,411 I don't think about saving the penguins dammit! I don't! 683 00:55:27,860 --> 00:55:30,818 Why did God create man before woman? 684 00:55:31,060 --> 00:55:34,211 First experiments, then miracles. 685 00:55:34,660 --> 00:55:37,220 Why haven't women learned how to park? 686 00:55:37,460 --> 00:55:41,009 Why do men honk their car horn for no reason? 687 00:55:41,260 --> 00:55:44,013 We're not going to get along. 688 00:55:45,060 --> 00:55:46,209 Good one. 689 00:55:46,660 --> 00:55:49,811 Did my boy buy panties wholesale? 690 00:55:54,060 --> 00:55:56,210 A gift of 900 panties? 691 00:55:57,060 --> 00:55:59,415 D'you think I'm a whore? 692 00:56:05,660 --> 00:56:08,015 The car has become an embassy, 693 00:56:08,260 --> 00:56:10,615 but I don't know of what country. 694 00:56:15,460 --> 00:56:16,813 I forgot to mention... 695 00:56:17,060 --> 00:56:18,812 that was the last time we made love. 696 00:56:19,060 --> 00:56:21,415 - Just so you know. - What did she say? 697 00:56:22,860 --> 00:56:24,418 What did you say? 698 00:56:24,660 --> 00:56:26,810 Don't you dare slam the door on me! 699 00:56:33,460 --> 00:56:37,009 - I've depressed you. - We'll talk tomorrow. 700 00:56:37,460 --> 00:56:39,815 - Good night. - Good night. 701 00:57:00,860 --> 00:57:02,009 What? 702 00:57:06,860 --> 00:57:08,612 The paper shredder... 703 00:57:08,860 --> 00:57:12,011 It sucked and chewed it and almost... 704 00:57:13,260 --> 00:57:15,216 What can I swear on? Tell me. 705 00:57:15,660 --> 00:57:18,618 I wish I could help but you've used everything up. 706 00:57:18,860 --> 00:57:20,816 Graves, souls, there's nothing left, dear. 707 00:57:21,260 --> 00:57:23,820 I won't stoop to your level. 708 00:57:24,460 --> 00:57:26,018 What can I say? 709 00:57:27,060 --> 00:57:28,618 What can I say? 710 00:57:30,860 --> 00:57:32,418 What can I say? 711 00:57:45,060 --> 00:57:47,210 I M ADE UP WITH THE ASSHOLE. 712 00:57:47,460 --> 00:57:51,419 LET'S GO TO AM USEM ENT PARK. VENIA. 713 00:57:51,660 --> 00:57:54,015 LOOK AT THINGS WITH HUMOR. 714 00:57:56,860 --> 00:57:58,612 Having a fuck, eh? 715 00:58:01,260 --> 00:58:02,818 Having a fuck, eh? 716 00:58:06,060 --> 00:58:07,618 Having a fuck, eh? 717 00:58:09,460 --> 00:58:12,213 - Take your time. - I would've told you. 718 00:58:12,460 --> 00:58:14,610 So I'm finding out quicker this way? 719 00:58:14,860 --> 00:58:17,818 Don't take it personally. It happens to everyone. 720 00:58:18,060 --> 00:58:21,211 It's the initial shock, you know. 721 00:58:22,060 --> 00:58:25,814 - What were you saying? - Don't stop... please. 722 00:58:26,660 --> 00:58:30,812 - I'll cook some eggs. - Will you eat with us, Alekos? 723 00:58:33,260 --> 00:58:34,409 Oh, alright. 724 00:58:37,660 --> 00:58:41,414 - Put some clothes on. - He's talking to you. 725 00:58:42,060 --> 00:58:44,620 I'll make some french fries, too. 726 00:58:45,860 --> 00:58:48,215 - You'll eat some, won't you? - Fuck the fries. 727 00:58:48,460 --> 00:58:51,020 I'll fuck them, because you've already... 728 00:58:51,260 --> 00:58:54,013 Hey, she didn't go with a stranger. 729 00:58:54,660 --> 00:58:57,811 - I'm starving. - It makes you hungry. 730 00:58:59,060 --> 00:59:00,812 You're caressing my leg. 731 00:59:05,660 --> 00:59:07,412 Play with me, too. 732 00:59:14,660 --> 00:59:16,013 I don't know. 733 00:59:20,260 --> 00:59:21,818 I don't think so. 734 00:59:53,060 --> 00:59:54,618 Was it the last time? 735 00:59:56,060 --> 00:59:58,016 Will it be the last time? 736 01:00:08,060 --> 01:00:09,812 Your coffee, Mr. Alekos. 737 01:00:10,060 --> 01:00:11,413 Take it away! 738 01:00:26,660 --> 01:00:28,412 - What's in the coffee? - Coffee. 739 01:00:28,660 --> 01:00:31,618 - Apart from coffee? - Your problem... 740 01:00:31,860 --> 01:00:34,010 that it's not pleasant when you drink it. 741 01:00:34,260 --> 01:00:36,820 I want us to talk! You know. 742 01:00:38,660 --> 01:00:41,015 It's not my fault that I can't get it up. 743 01:00:41,260 --> 01:00:44,411 It might be due to stress, or pollution... 744 01:00:44,660 --> 01:00:47,220 it could be hereditary, or due to age. 745 01:00:47,660 --> 01:00:50,618 - There's so much. - Where are you going? 746 01:00:50,860 --> 01:00:53,818 - Don't be surprised if... - I get it up? 747 01:00:54,060 --> 01:00:56,415 Heavy stuff so early in the morning! 748 01:00:57,260 --> 01:00:58,818 I'll drink tea. 749 01:01:08,260 --> 01:01:10,410 Hirohito... Nagasaki... 750 01:01:18,860 --> 01:01:21,215 1,2,3... Fuck me, fuck me. 751 01:01:24,460 --> 01:01:26,610 1,2,3... rip me apart. 752 01:01:37,060 --> 01:01:38,209 Constantine? 753 01:01:40,420 --> 01:01:42,775 Should I write it on a neon sign? 754 01:01:42,860 --> 01:01:45,215 "This is the last screw." 755 01:01:46,060 --> 01:01:47,618 You're not a man. You don't understand. 756 01:01:47,860 --> 01:01:49,418 - Right? - Right. 757 01:01:50,060 --> 01:01:53,018 If I'd known, I'd have given it my all. 758 01:01:53,260 --> 01:01:56,411 But then what would you be left with? 759 01:01:57,860 --> 01:02:01,216 Are you sure I had an orgasm with you? 760 01:02:10,060 --> 01:02:12,016 I'm not gonna drink coffee today. 761 01:02:12,260 --> 01:02:14,820 I can't believe you didn't have an orgasm. 762 01:02:15,060 --> 01:02:17,813 - What about all that screaming? - Special effects. 763 01:02:18,060 --> 01:02:20,415 I can do it for you now... 764 01:02:28,860 --> 01:02:30,612 - I'm kidding. - Why? 765 01:02:34,660 --> 01:02:37,015 I'm dying and you're playing 8-ball. 766 01:02:37,260 --> 01:02:39,012 Go away, I'm losing. 767 01:02:39,260 --> 01:02:42,218 - You used me. - It's over for me. 768 01:02:45,260 --> 01:02:47,410 We'll be on the news, Andrea, I warn you. 769 01:02:47,660 --> 01:02:50,618 - Don't push me! - Beat it, you jerk! 770 01:02:53,260 --> 01:02:58,414 It was absurd for Odysseus to expect Penelope to wait. 771 01:02:58,660 --> 01:03:00,810 She was probably screwing. 772 01:03:01,860 --> 01:03:03,009 Probably. 773 01:03:03,460 --> 01:03:06,418 - It's Odysseus' problem. - It's Constantine's problem. 774 01:03:06,660 --> 01:03:09,618 But why did Odysseus have to go through so much? 775 01:03:09,860 --> 01:03:12,818 Only to leave Troy and find his wife on all fours...? 776 01:03:14,060 --> 01:03:16,210 If he knew, he'd have gone somewhere else. 777 01:03:16,460 --> 01:03:18,416 He wouldn't have gone to Ithaca, but to... 778 01:03:18,660 --> 01:03:19,809 Vourvourou. 779 01:03:22,260 --> 01:03:23,613 - Yannis? - Yes. 780 01:03:24,060 --> 01:03:26,620 I don't think the point is Penelope and Odysseus. 781 01:03:26,860 --> 01:03:29,010 I think it's Abbott and Costello, 782 01:03:30,460 --> 01:03:32,018 Bolek and Lolek. 783 01:03:32,460 --> 01:03:34,815 Let's not psychoanalyze it anymore. 784 01:03:35,060 --> 01:03:38,609 It's an asshole's ego trip and it just happened to be me. 785 01:03:39,660 --> 01:03:41,616 I know what I have to do... 786 01:03:42,260 --> 01:03:43,818 I'm an asshole! 787 01:03:45,460 --> 01:03:47,815 You're not the only one! 788 01:03:55,460 --> 01:03:57,610 See if you like them. 789 01:04:01,060 --> 01:04:02,413 They're beautiful. 790 01:04:02,660 --> 01:04:05,811 Beautiful and large. Faces Northeast, eh? 791 01:04:09,660 --> 01:04:13,619 Rooftop therapy's not really my goal in life. 792 01:04:14,660 --> 01:04:18,619 It's fine but I took over because Katy got ill. 793 01:04:19,660 --> 01:04:23,209 Things will be better for me in Germany. 794 01:04:24,660 --> 01:04:26,810 What if I say that I'll miss you? 795 01:04:27,060 --> 01:04:30,814 I've heard that before. Venia's disappeared again? 796 01:04:31,060 --> 01:04:34,609 No, she left a message. She's gone back to... 797 01:04:34,860 --> 01:04:37,613 You can stay the night with me, 798 01:04:38,060 --> 01:04:41,211 if Freud doesn't bother you, or I for that matter. 799 01:04:41,460 --> 01:04:43,018 On the contrary. 800 01:06:13,260 --> 01:06:16,411 This wasn't something I'd planned. 801 01:06:18,660 --> 01:06:20,810 I've got to go to bed. 802 01:06:21,460 --> 01:06:23,815 I have to pack tomorrow. 803 01:06:24,660 --> 01:06:28,209 I told you. There nothing to keep me here. 804 01:06:30,060 --> 01:06:33,211 You could be right. I just want to thank you. 805 01:06:33,460 --> 01:06:34,609 Thank Venia. 806 01:06:35,860 --> 01:06:38,215 I'd like to go with you tomorrow... 807 01:06:39,060 --> 01:06:42,211 and not be at my wedding anniversary. 808 01:06:43,460 --> 01:06:46,418 Don't rush things. There's still fog up ahead. 809 01:06:46,660 --> 01:06:48,218 Am I in danger? 810 01:06:51,060 --> 01:06:52,209 You, inside! 811 01:06:57,660 --> 01:07:00,811 I hope you'll be fine on the sofa. 812 01:07:04,460 --> 01:07:06,610 - Goodnight. - Goodnight. 813 01:07:13,660 --> 01:07:14,809 Not a word. 814 01:08:32,860 --> 01:08:36,216 You have to tell him, he's your friend. 815 01:08:36,660 --> 01:08:38,616 He should know about his wife. 816 01:08:38,860 --> 01:08:40,816 If you tell him, we're through. 817 01:08:41,260 --> 01:08:44,411 I'll say it in my own way, without really telling him. 818 01:08:44,660 --> 01:08:48,016 - Do you change bandages? - As soon as Mr. Alekos gives... 819 01:08:54,460 --> 01:08:55,813 Good morning. 820 01:08:56,660 --> 01:08:59,220 - How was Paris? - Just great. 821 01:09:02,860 --> 01:09:05,613 Is the Eiffel Tower still high? 822 01:09:05,860 --> 01:09:08,818 - There's a reason I'm asking. - Really? 823 01:09:10,060 --> 01:09:11,812 - Theoni! - Was it nice? 824 01:09:12,060 --> 01:09:14,415 Yes. How was the love affair while I was gone? 825 01:09:14,860 --> 01:09:18,614 It's no joke. He won't even insure my brother. 826 01:09:18,860 --> 01:09:21,215 - What happened to the priest? - His cassock caught fire again. 827 01:09:21,660 --> 01:09:23,218 We'll insure him against the holocaust. 828 01:09:23,660 --> 01:09:26,811 - Goldfish! - You're such an asshole. 829 01:09:29,260 --> 01:09:32,616 Couldn't you call to say you were okay? 830 01:09:34,660 --> 01:09:38,619 Important thing is you had a good time, right? 831 01:09:40,260 --> 01:09:42,820 It was beyond perfect. It was fantastic. 832 01:09:43,060 --> 01:09:46,814 They say Frenchwomen use perfume, so they don't stink. 833 01:09:47,060 --> 01:09:50,416 - Any luck? - You know that's not my style. 834 01:09:50,860 --> 01:09:54,011 If you don't screw around now, when will you? 835 01:09:55,660 --> 01:09:58,015 Are you screwing around these days? 836 01:09:58,460 --> 01:10:01,020 No, but the thought does cross my mind. 837 01:10:01,260 --> 01:10:03,410 But it doesn't stay there? 838 01:10:03,660 --> 01:10:05,218 If it did, you'd tell me, wouldn't you? 839 01:10:05,660 --> 01:10:08,220 You'd be the first to know. 840 01:10:08,460 --> 01:10:10,815 - Want to hear a joke? - No. 841 01:10:12,260 --> 01:10:14,820 A guy goes to the Eiffel Tower and says... 842 01:10:15,060 --> 01:10:17,016 "My God, I'm so short." 843 01:10:17,260 --> 01:10:19,260 "Don't worry," says the Eiffel Tower, 844 01:10:19,260 --> 01:10:22,013 "with your cuckold's horns, you're as tall as I am." 845 01:10:23,060 --> 01:10:24,209 It's a joke! 846 01:10:25,260 --> 01:10:28,809 Thanks for everything. You have my number... 847 01:10:29,260 --> 01:10:30,613 Have a good trip... 848 01:10:30,860 --> 01:10:34,819 And when the fog clears, see me. Constantine. 849 01:10:39,260 --> 01:10:42,616 Don't make it raven black. Just enough to hide the grey. 850 01:10:42,860 --> 01:10:44,009 Raven black! 851 01:10:45,060 --> 01:10:46,618 Don't you be afraid and let's keep it serious. 852 01:10:46,860 --> 01:10:48,418 So go on, tell me... I thought as much. 853 01:10:48,660 --> 01:10:50,218 OK, something almost happened, but it didn't work out. 854 01:10:50,660 --> 01:10:52,616 - Near the Seine? - At the cathedral. 855 01:10:52,860 --> 01:10:55,818 - Quasimodo's sister? - No, we're talking goddess! 856 01:10:56,060 --> 01:10:59,609 But if your wife's okay, you can't. It's psychological. 857 01:11:00,060 --> 01:11:04,815 If she fucks around, however, with this guy and that guy... 858 01:11:05,060 --> 01:11:06,413 One's enough. 859 01:11:06,660 --> 01:11:09,015 But in my case my wife's beyond reproach. 860 01:11:09,260 --> 01:11:11,216 - Lf she wasn't... - lf she wasn't? 861 01:11:11,460 --> 01:11:13,416 I'd kill them both. 862 01:11:13,660 --> 01:11:15,412 - You'd kill her? - And him. 863 01:11:15,660 --> 01:11:18,811 - Of course... and him. - Of course. 864 01:11:19,660 --> 01:11:22,220 Don't forget about tonight. 865 01:11:22,460 --> 01:11:24,815 No, no... What's tonight? 866 01:11:27,660 --> 01:11:29,260 Our 6th wedding anniversary. 867 01:11:29,260 --> 01:11:31,410 You were my best man. 868 01:11:33,060 --> 01:11:36,211 - Is it hot in here or is it me? - It's you. 869 01:11:36,460 --> 01:11:38,416 It's coming out raven black! 870 01:11:45,260 --> 01:11:48,411 - From Paris to Kozani? - Yes, Kozani. 871 01:11:50,060 --> 01:11:51,618 I'm leaving at dawn... 872 01:11:51,860 --> 01:11:54,010 and coming back on Sunday. 873 01:11:54,260 --> 01:11:56,820 It's an important job. D'you want to come? 874 01:11:57,260 --> 01:12:00,013 No. If it was Thessaloniki... 875 01:12:01,060 --> 01:12:03,415 - You'd come to Thessaloniki? - Absolutely. 876 01:12:03,660 --> 01:12:06,413 But Kozani... holds you back. 877 01:12:09,860 --> 01:12:12,420 - Know who I dreamt about? - My wife. 878 01:12:12,660 --> 01:12:15,811 - Don't be an asshole. - I'm kidding. 879 01:12:16,060 --> 01:12:18,813 - That's not funny. - I laughed. 880 01:12:19,860 --> 01:12:21,612 - I dreamt about Stella. - Who? 881 01:12:22,060 --> 01:12:24,415 My 8-month love affair? 882 01:12:27,060 --> 01:12:30,211 Daphne's great, but she doesn't do it for me. 883 01:12:31,460 --> 01:12:34,213 Of course, Stella wouldn't have waited for me. 884 01:12:34,460 --> 01:12:36,018 She has kids by now... 885 01:12:36,260 --> 01:12:38,820 but it turns me on to think about it. 886 01:12:41,860 --> 01:12:44,010 - How do I look? - You look fine. 887 01:12:44,260 --> 01:12:46,410 How would I look... with a kid? 888 01:12:46,660 --> 01:12:48,412 - What kid? - A kid. 889 01:12:50,260 --> 01:12:51,409 A real kid? 890 01:12:52,260 --> 01:12:54,615 Andrea asked me not to tell you. 891 01:12:54,860 --> 01:12:57,613 She said especially not you. 892 01:12:58,060 --> 01:13:01,416 But if I don't tell you, who do I tell? 893 01:13:02,860 --> 01:13:04,009 No way. 894 01:13:05,260 --> 01:13:08,013 Of course the dates don't quite match... 895 01:13:08,460 --> 01:13:11,418 But the father could hardly be someone else, right? 896 01:13:13,260 --> 01:13:16,809 Nowadays they can find out through the DN A. 897 01:13:48,060 --> 01:13:49,209 No way, man. 898 01:13:49,460 --> 01:13:50,609 The chicken. 899 01:13:51,460 --> 01:13:54,611 With lemon sauce, rosemary, thyme, fennel... 900 01:13:54,860 --> 01:13:57,613 - Budapest olives... - Prague prunes... 901 01:13:57,860 --> 01:14:00,215 Is there anything it doesn't have? 902 01:14:00,460 --> 01:14:03,213 I'll have duck with goose sauce. 903 01:14:03,460 --> 01:14:06,213 Duck with orange goose sauce. 904 01:14:06,660 --> 01:14:08,013 It's as if it were yesterday. 905 01:14:08,260 --> 01:14:11,218 It feels the same... a burning sensation. 906 01:14:12,460 --> 01:14:15,611 - Steak. - After studying the whole menu? 907 01:14:15,860 --> 01:14:17,612 Is that a problem? 908 01:14:19,060 --> 01:14:21,813 I'll have whatever my friend has. 909 01:14:22,060 --> 01:14:24,210 The friend's steak... 910 01:14:27,460 --> 01:14:30,816 So, how was Paris? Your first time, right? 911 01:14:31,060 --> 01:14:34,609 No. Wonderful! I'll tell you a joke I heard there. 912 01:14:34,860 --> 01:14:38,614 A Spanish guy sees his best friend fucking his wife. 913 01:14:38,860 --> 01:14:43,217 "Buenos dias," he says, "Buenas tardes," she says. 914 01:14:44,460 --> 01:14:46,815 And from the closet, you hear, "Ooooooo..." 915 01:14:48,460 --> 01:14:49,609 Tarzan? 916 01:15:01,460 --> 01:15:04,611 Come on, it's a great restaurant. 917 01:15:08,660 --> 01:15:10,616 - Let's go now! - Why? 918 01:15:10,860 --> 01:15:14,011 - I'll tell you later. - Hey, wait! 919 01:15:15,260 --> 01:15:17,410 What a shame. You're so rude. 920 01:15:20,460 --> 01:15:24,612 ...and the Spanish guy yells, "Let's get organized!" 921 01:15:25,460 --> 01:15:29,419 - Are you on coke? - I just feel incredibly high. 922 01:15:30,060 --> 01:15:32,620 I've got a terrible headache. 923 01:15:32,860 --> 01:15:35,215 - It must be a migraine. - I read in Paris... 924 01:15:35,660 --> 01:15:38,015 When half of your head thinks something, 925 01:15:38,260 --> 01:15:40,012 and the other half something else, then... 926 01:15:40,460 --> 01:15:42,212 - You get a migraine. - Yes. 927 01:15:42,660 --> 01:15:44,616 Come on, I'm just kidding. 928 01:15:48,460 --> 01:15:51,213 - To our love. - To our passion. 929 01:15:51,660 --> 01:15:54,618 - To your passion. - To your love. 930 01:15:56,660 --> 01:15:57,809 To the heir! 931 01:16:19,660 --> 01:16:21,013 What's wrong? 932 01:16:41,260 --> 01:16:44,411 You've got no imagination when it comes to lovemaking. 933 01:16:44,660 --> 01:16:48,619 And if you haven't, some other guy will screw her. 934 01:16:50,860 --> 01:16:52,816 If he's a prince... 935 01:16:54,060 --> 01:16:56,016 then I'm a bullfighter. 936 01:16:56,860 --> 01:16:58,816 No. Emperor Nero... 937 01:17:00,260 --> 01:17:03,411 I'll make it sizzle... completely! 938 01:17:37,460 --> 01:17:38,813 PLEASE HOLD 939 01:17:41,060 --> 01:17:42,618 IT'S CONSTANTINE 940 01:17:44,060 --> 01:17:47,416 I WANT US TO H AVE CELL PHONE SEX - ASK M E AN YTHING 941 01:17:52,660 --> 01:17:55,015 TAKE OFF YOUR BRA 942 01:18:11,460 --> 01:18:13,018 I'M COM ING DO WN 943 01:18:23,260 --> 01:18:25,216 IT'S NICE DO WN HERE 944 01:18:27,060 --> 01:18:28,618 LICK M E ALL O VER 945 01:18:35,460 --> 01:18:37,018 YOU'RE HORN Y I FEEL IT 946 01:19:10,660 --> 01:19:13,015 I C AN'T TAKE IT AN YMORE 947 01:19:13,660 --> 01:19:14,809 DEEPER 948 01:19:25,060 --> 01:19:26,618 Open the door! 949 01:19:27,980 --> 01:19:30,335 I'm off to Kozani. Back on Sunday. 950 01:19:30,660 --> 01:19:33,413 I adore you. It was wonderful. Constantine. 951 01:19:41,460 --> 01:19:44,418 Hi. Have you parked? Come on up. 952 01:20:08,260 --> 01:20:10,012 The fucking paper came! 953 01:20:10,660 --> 01:20:12,412 My fucking citizenship. 954 01:20:13,460 --> 01:20:15,815 - You must be happy now. - I am. 955 01:20:17,660 --> 01:20:20,811 - I'll call you. - I'll be at the gym. 956 01:20:21,660 --> 01:20:23,218 It finally came. 957 01:20:25,460 --> 01:20:27,416 You're flying high. 958 01:21:09,860 --> 01:21:12,420 Alekos, I'm calling you from Kozani. 959 01:21:12,660 --> 01:21:16,414 Please drop by the house and talk to Andrea. 960 01:21:18,460 --> 01:21:20,815 Don't tell her I called you. 961 01:21:21,260 --> 01:21:23,615 She wants to have an abortion. 962 01:21:24,060 --> 01:21:26,620 - Please speak to her. - Okay, bye. 963 01:21:36,060 --> 01:21:39,609 You haven't called me with any information. 964 01:21:39,860 --> 01:21:42,215 I'll tell you up close. 965 01:21:42,660 --> 01:21:45,811 - Can't you tell me from afar? - I've got evidence. 966 01:21:51,060 --> 01:21:53,620 - Is she at home? - No, she's at the gym. 967 01:21:54,060 --> 01:21:55,413 I'm on my way. 968 01:21:56,860 --> 01:21:59,420 - Where are you going? - To Miami. 969 01:21:59,660 --> 01:22:01,412 Did you book a hotel? 970 01:22:03,060 --> 01:22:04,413 It's a joke. 971 01:22:10,260 --> 01:22:12,615 - Hello? - You don't know me. 972 01:22:12,860 --> 01:22:16,011 - Lf you say so. - I'm a woman who loves you. 973 01:22:19,060 --> 01:22:21,415 Because I love you, I want you to know that... 974 01:22:22,260 --> 01:22:24,012 your wife is sleeping with your best friend Alekos. 975 01:22:24,260 --> 01:22:27,411 Right now, she's at the "Jump & Jump" gym. 976 01:22:27,860 --> 01:22:30,420 - Everyone's jumping. - Jump & Jump. 977 01:22:31,860 --> 01:22:33,816 When you find out who I am... 978 01:22:36,860 --> 01:22:39,010 Everyone knows she's screwing around. 979 01:22:56,860 --> 01:23:00,011 You're crazy. What're you doing here? 980 01:23:00,260 --> 01:23:03,218 I can't believe our relationship's over. 981 01:23:03,660 --> 01:23:06,811 Well, believe it and scram. How did you find me? 982 01:23:07,060 --> 01:23:08,812 I ran around and found you. 983 01:23:09,260 --> 01:23:11,410 I'm going to tell Constantine and Daphne, 984 01:23:11,660 --> 01:23:13,810 but I've got something to tell you. 985 01:23:14,060 --> 01:23:17,018 I can't talk while I'm running. It's impossible. 986 01:23:17,260 --> 01:23:19,615 - Stop. - How does it stop? 987 01:23:22,860 --> 01:23:25,010 I won't let you get rid of this baby. 988 01:23:25,260 --> 01:23:27,820 The baby's mine... unless it's his. 989 01:23:29,260 --> 01:23:30,860 - What're you doing? - You're a fool. 990 01:23:30,860 --> 01:23:32,612 Don't increase the speed! 991 01:23:35,660 --> 01:23:38,220 Don't do that to me. How does it stop? 992 01:23:38,460 --> 01:23:40,815 It's like a motorway - no traffic lights. 993 01:23:41,260 --> 01:23:42,818 If it's a boy... 994 01:23:43,660 --> 01:23:45,616 How does this thing stop? 995 01:23:47,260 --> 01:23:49,410 Hey, pal! Hey... mercy! 996 01:23:52,060 --> 01:23:54,620 This is killing me! What do I press? 997 01:23:58,260 --> 01:24:02,617 Have I done something? What have I done? Excuse me... 998 01:24:03,060 --> 01:24:05,813 - It's for women only. - What have I done? 999 01:24:06,660 --> 01:24:08,616 I know there's someone else. 1000 01:24:08,860 --> 01:24:11,613 I've got proof, but I don't care about that. 1001 01:24:11,860 --> 01:24:14,215 I want to know whose baby it is. 1002 01:24:14,460 --> 01:24:17,213 - Is it his? Mine? Whose? - It's his. 1003 01:24:17,460 --> 01:24:20,418 - I'm sweating. - You're in a sauna. 1004 01:24:20,660 --> 01:24:24,209 Okay, okay we'll talk, we won't just fuck. 1005 01:24:26,260 --> 01:24:28,012 I'm to blame, I know. 1006 01:24:29,860 --> 01:24:33,011 We can talk about anything you like... world poverty... 1007 01:24:33,260 --> 01:24:38,015 photosynthesis... the Ionely distance between main arteries. 1008 01:24:39,060 --> 01:24:40,618 What're you talking about? 1009 01:24:41,260 --> 01:24:45,014 How do those fucking camels stand the heat? 1010 01:24:46,060 --> 01:24:49,211 We can talk about the negative aspects of this topic, too. 1011 01:24:49,660 --> 01:24:51,412 - Alekos? Hi. - Constantine? 1012 01:24:51,660 --> 01:24:54,811 Any excuses or are we discussing this in 10 years? 1013 01:24:55,060 --> 01:24:57,415 I wake up this morning and what do I decide? 1014 01:24:57,660 --> 01:24:59,810 Or rather I don't decide... how life turns out... 1015 01:25:00,060 --> 01:25:04,019 How does life turn out? How does it turn out, Alekos? 1016 01:25:04,260 --> 01:25:06,012 You talk, Alekos, I feel terrible. 1017 01:25:06,260 --> 01:25:08,012 You're not the only one. 1018 01:25:08,460 --> 01:25:12,214 - This isn't a good place. - Were we looking for one? 1019 01:25:13,060 --> 01:25:15,813 Are the two of us going to talk about it, or the three of us... 1020 01:25:16,060 --> 01:25:17,618 or is the slut going to stay? 1021 01:25:17,860 --> 01:25:19,612 - Should the slut leave? - Yes! 1022 01:25:26,260 --> 01:25:28,216 Well, spit on me, go on! 1023 01:25:28,460 --> 01:25:31,611 Don't beg me, it's top of my list of priorities. 1024 01:25:32,260 --> 01:25:35,218 Just move over a bit, so I don't miss. 1025 01:25:41,660 --> 01:25:43,412 Asshole, what we had was more important than her. 1026 01:25:44,260 --> 01:25:48,014 You prick! I've known you since we were six. 1027 01:25:48,860 --> 01:25:52,011 How could you look me in the eyes all these years? 1028 01:25:53,060 --> 01:25:56,018 - You think it was easy? - It wasn't? 1029 01:25:56,260 --> 01:25:58,012 No! Pass me the shampoo. 1030 01:26:13,260 --> 01:26:17,219 Each day, I tried to find the courage to tell you. 1031 01:26:18,060 --> 01:26:20,016 And you still haven't. 1032 01:26:21,260 --> 01:26:24,013 Of course nothing really earthshaking happened. 1033 01:26:24,260 --> 01:26:26,615 - We didn't... - I saw you. 1034 01:26:28,060 --> 01:26:30,813 The water's freezing. We shouldn't have gone in. 1035 01:26:31,060 --> 01:26:32,413 You're unbelievable. 1036 01:26:32,660 --> 01:26:35,618 I'm serious. I was a black stud in my past life. 1037 01:26:35,860 --> 01:26:39,011 Well, in this life, you haven't slowed down much. 1038 01:26:39,460 --> 01:26:41,610 I've always envied you, except for one thing... 1039 01:26:41,860 --> 01:26:45,409 that you can forget everything in a few seconds. 1040 01:26:45,660 --> 01:26:48,015 - I don't remember that. - How could you? 1041 01:26:48,460 --> 01:26:50,610 I was proud I had the memory of an elephant. 1042 01:26:50,860 --> 01:26:54,011 But now I envy your goldfish memory. 1043 01:26:55,260 --> 01:26:58,616 Everything would have been different. 1044 01:26:59,060 --> 01:27:02,018 What are you saying? Speak clearly. 1045 01:27:02,260 --> 01:27:06,219 Only if I make marriage... not real marriage... 1046 01:27:08,060 --> 01:27:09,812 - then I stay. - All right. 1047 01:27:10,060 --> 01:27:12,813 I've got a friend - friend - 1048 01:27:13,660 --> 01:27:16,413 He'll marry you and we'll still be together. 1049 01:27:17,060 --> 01:27:19,620 - Constantine? - You know him? 1050 01:27:20,060 --> 01:27:22,415 I don't. Daphne say Constantine... 1051 01:27:23,660 --> 01:27:27,016 I not understand. This friend say okay? 1052 01:27:27,660 --> 01:27:31,619 Oh, mama! He'll fall in love with you right away. 1053 01:27:32,460 --> 01:27:33,813 What? My mama? 1054 01:27:34,060 --> 01:27:38,611 I fell in love with her. What could I do? I was losing her. 1055 01:27:38,860 --> 01:27:41,010 I kept saying that I'd find the courage... 1056 01:27:41,260 --> 01:27:44,013 and the right moment to tell you. 1057 01:27:44,260 --> 01:27:46,615 - You'd remember, then forgot. - That's it. 1058 01:27:46,860 --> 01:27:50,216 Congratulations! We'll never speak to each other again. 1059 01:27:51,660 --> 01:27:55,016 - You're bitter. - How else should I be? 1060 01:27:59,660 --> 01:28:01,616 Let's go to the bumper cars. 1061 01:28:02,260 --> 01:28:05,616 After all that, I can't look you in the eyes. 1062 01:28:05,660 --> 01:28:08,015 But it was true that I loved you. 1063 01:28:08,060 --> 01:28:12,611 It's inhuman for a woman to be wanted only for her money. 1064 01:28:15,260 --> 01:28:18,411 Find a woman who really deserves you. 1065 01:28:20,860 --> 01:28:25,012 It's tough to find out that her husband 1066 01:28:25,860 --> 01:28:29,409 is having an affair with her best friend. 1067 01:28:31,060 --> 01:28:35,611 One thing I'll swear to you. I'll never see Alekos again. 1068 01:28:37,860 --> 01:28:41,819 I loved you, Alekos. You never realized that. 1069 01:28:50,860 --> 01:28:55,217 Here are the tapes from Thodoros, and this is from me. 1070 01:28:55,660 --> 01:28:57,616 - What is it? - You'll need it. 1071 01:28:57,860 --> 01:28:59,612 - What is it? - Grass. 1072 01:29:00,060 --> 01:29:02,415 I can't even roll over... how can I roll a joint? 1073 01:29:02,660 --> 01:29:05,811 As soon as you hear the tapes, it'll come naturally. 1074 01:29:23,660 --> 01:29:27,812 You've got to beam yourself over here right now. 1075 01:29:32,660 --> 01:29:35,811 I'm coming, but there's no way... 1076 01:29:40,260 --> 01:29:43,218 You might change your mind when you hear this. 1077 01:29:45,460 --> 01:29:47,815 - I don't think so. - Listen and see. 1078 01:29:49,860 --> 01:29:54,411 It's so great to lie in bed without a jerk on top of you! 1079 01:29:55,860 --> 01:29:58,215 What did they say at the ministry? 1080 01:29:58,460 --> 01:30:00,815 The paperwork's finished. 1081 01:30:01,860 --> 01:30:05,011 - When I get those papers... - She means the citizenship. 1082 01:30:08,460 --> 01:30:11,213 They're such morons, especially my husband. 1083 01:30:11,660 --> 01:30:14,015 How did I keep from laughing all these years? 1084 01:30:15,660 --> 01:30:19,209 I know, and you had to do it with him too. 1085 01:30:20,260 --> 01:30:23,411 Thank God, mine stopped touching me ages ago. 1086 01:30:23,660 --> 01:30:26,618 I used to stress him out so he couldn't get it up. 1087 01:30:28,460 --> 01:30:31,418 There's no more pathetic sight than that! 1088 01:30:31,660 --> 01:30:33,412 Constantine's different. 1089 01:30:33,860 --> 01:30:36,613 - He's... - More of a sensitive idiot... 1090 01:30:37,260 --> 01:30:40,411 I don't know. The last time I felt something... 1091 01:30:41,860 --> 01:30:43,418 You'll get over it. 1092 01:30:43,660 --> 01:30:46,618 Men never understand when a woman has an orgasm. 1093 01:30:49,460 --> 01:30:52,020 All they care about is how many times. 1094 01:30:52,460 --> 01:30:56,214 They'll boast they did it five times and they might all stink. 1095 01:30:56,460 --> 01:30:59,418 At some point, I screamed so much, it was so fake... 1096 01:30:59,660 --> 01:31:01,810 that I was sure he'd realize it, but no. 1097 01:31:02,060 --> 01:31:04,813 They'll be sorry. You should've seen mine... 1098 01:31:05,060 --> 01:31:08,211 whenever I pretended to be suspicious. 1099 01:31:08,460 --> 01:31:13,011 So funny. Make a man feel guilty and sit back and enjoy. 1100 01:31:14,860 --> 01:31:17,818 If Alekos ever finds out about the will, he'II... 1101 01:31:18,060 --> 01:31:20,415 He won't. The lawyer's a friend of mine. 1102 01:31:20,660 --> 01:31:24,414 If Alekos knew I married him because according to the will... 1103 01:31:24,660 --> 01:31:27,220 I get the inheritance after five years of marriage, 1104 01:31:27,660 --> 01:31:31,414 he'd not only stick around, he'd probably even get it up. 1105 01:31:32,860 --> 01:31:35,420 - Maybe. - Very likely. 1106 01:31:35,660 --> 01:31:40,211 If only there was a camera, so we could see them crying. 1107 01:31:42,060 --> 01:31:44,415 - Where are you going? - To the bathroom. 1108 01:31:49,540 --> 01:31:52,896 We need a big, fat joint for this one. 1109 01:31:54,060 --> 01:31:56,813 - Unbelievable! - Unbelievable. 1110 01:32:12,860 --> 01:32:16,614 - Are we two assholes or what? - Yes, we are. 1111 01:32:18,060 --> 01:32:21,211 I was wondering why that waiter at the restaurant went nuts, 1112 01:32:21,460 --> 01:32:22,813 gaping like that. 1113 01:32:23,060 --> 01:32:25,813 They were doing touchy-feely under the table. 1114 01:32:26,060 --> 01:32:28,415 And we were beaming like jerks. 1115 01:32:32,460 --> 01:32:35,418 - Friends again? - Kismet. 1116 01:32:38,060 --> 01:32:41,416 - Do you recall? - No, I'm not sleepy at all. 1117 01:32:41,660 --> 01:32:45,414 I said recall... you know like remember...? 1118 01:32:48,460 --> 01:32:50,018 - Stella. - Stella! 1119 01:32:50,860 --> 01:32:53,613 - Which Stella? - The one I met. 1120 01:32:54,060 --> 01:32:55,413 No, the one I left. 1121 01:32:55,660 --> 01:32:58,015 This time we'll each have our own Stella. 1122 01:32:59,660 --> 01:33:02,811 - What's the deal? - I don't know... 1123 01:33:03,660 --> 01:33:05,616 I'm on another planet. 1124 01:33:05,860 --> 01:33:08,010 Someone's gotta stay and lock the door. 1125 01:33:08,260 --> 01:33:10,615 I like this inexplicable joy that I feel. 1126 01:33:18,860 --> 01:33:21,818 Want to let her rip and talk about some social issue? 1127 01:33:26,060 --> 01:33:29,814 I sounded like that singer Dalaras there. 1128 01:33:38,060 --> 01:33:42,019 I feel like a fly on the ceiling looking down. 1129 01:33:42,260 --> 01:33:44,410 Isn't this a social experience? 1130 01:33:44,660 --> 01:33:47,015 - What? - This... whole fucking thing. 1131 01:33:50,860 --> 01:33:52,816 This is great stuff. 1132 01:33:53,460 --> 01:33:56,418 From Elbasan in Albania, like the poet says. 1133 01:33:56,660 --> 01:33:59,015 - Which poet? - Engonopoulos. 1134 01:34:03,660 --> 01:34:06,220 How'd you say that? Elbasan? 1135 01:34:08,060 --> 01:34:10,415 - What's in it? - Whatever the courier put in. 1136 01:34:13,860 --> 01:34:17,216 I want to turn myself in to the police. 1137 01:34:18,260 --> 01:34:20,820 I can be a witness for the prosecution. 1138 01:34:24,260 --> 01:34:27,013 I'll take a nap. We are in my home, right? 1139 01:34:28,060 --> 01:34:30,210 - I can't tell. - The ceiling's grey. 1140 01:34:32,260 --> 01:34:33,409 Grey, eh? 1141 01:34:45,860 --> 01:34:48,010 I must be laughing like a jerk. 1142 01:34:51,260 --> 01:34:53,820 - One brandy and we're off. - Where to? 1143 01:35:55,060 --> 01:35:58,609 There's something keeping me here. Call me. Stella. 1144 01:35:59,060 --> 01:36:01,210 - Stella! - Stella! 1145 01:36:05,060 --> 01:36:08,018 Stella and I got together that very same night. 1146 01:36:09,060 --> 01:36:11,016 I must remember to tell... 1147 01:36:11,660 --> 01:36:12,809 ...Alekos. 87089

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