Original subtitles

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-HiWilmar. How are you?. - Everything's just great.

- You're looking healthy again. - Yes.

- Hi. - Hi.

It's been ages. You're so skinny.

I've still got my love handles.

- Hi. Happy birthday, Lola. - Thanks. Welcome.

Hi, and welcome.

- Happy birthday. - Oh, how nice. Thank you.

- lsn't that pretty. - Come and say hi.

I'll put it down here for now.

Wilmar's daughter?. Last time we met, you were this big.

You were out back, completely naked, in love with a guy at the grocer's.

- Remember?. The man in the deli. - Oh, right.

- Time flies.. - He must be my age by now.

Shall we go in and.. have a drink?.

Do you recognise them?. Charlotte's parents.

The girl who was so hen-pecked in school.

Hi.

- Let's see, it's..Hanna?. - No, Mia.

That's right. How are you?. I haven't seen you in ages.

- Don't you look nice. - I thought I'd dress up a little.

Welcome. Very nice to meet you. My name is Lola.

- Give herthe present. - Here, happy birtday.

- Thank you very much. - You're welcome.

- You speak Swedish?. - I speak only little Swedish.

- We speak Swedish at home. - How long have you been in Sweden?.

- Six month only. - So you've been here in winter.

- Here you are. - Thanks.

I'd like one too, please. - That was my husband Wilmar.

He'll say hello to you later;, he's busy. - Thanks. Can you take this?.

- Did you like the snow?. - Yes.

- There wasn't much snow. - No, but she got to play in it.

- Everything okay with the kids?. - Just great.

- You've got two teenagers now. - Yes, I know.

- How does that feel?. - It's fun.

It's going great.

Thatwas a nice one.

Happy birthday, Lola. - Come and give me a hand.

Thatwas beautiful.

- We're awfully close. - You're not afraid, are you?.

- Eh?. - No..

Now I just need a match thatworks..

Don't get too close.

Watch out. Watch out. Watch out.

Nothing happened.

Too bad Wilmar. Next year the grandkids will be in charge.

Aren't you funny..

Give me the flashlight.

Hang on..

- Don't get too close, Wilmar. - I'm just going to look.

Remember, you're not sober.

Be careful, Dad.

- BANG. - This is your day to be funny, eh?.

- I knew it. I knew it. - Dad. Dad. Are you okay?.

- Dad.. - I can't look. I can't look.

I'm okay. I'm okay.

- I'm all right. - Dad..

Mother. I'm all right.

Come here. Come on. Emily, get over here.

Listen up, everyone. Time for coffee and birthday cake.

- Dad, what are you doing?. - It hit you right in the eye.

INVOLUNTARY

I saw "DearWriter, Dear Actress", that Chekhov play you were in.

I really liked it. I saw it twice.

- And you were so good. - That's nice to hear.

Overall. You're so good. I've seen a lot that you've done.

Revues, that Christmas special where you were a constable..

- It was so funny. - Yes, it was..

And lots of films too, serious and funny.

And you have four kids. How do you manage?.

I don't always, but most of the time I get by.

- Well, I'm impressed. You go, girl. - Thank you.

- Have you heard from Hollywood?. - No, I don't think..

- Are you hoping to?. - No, I'm happy as I am.

It's a shock being on a coach with you. I'd have thought you'd fly.

No..no, this was..the best alternative for getting home today.

- Well, I'll see you on the trip. - That'll be fun..

- Would you like a mint?. - Oh, thanks.

- This is my husband. - Hi.

- Oh, I took too much. - Don'tworry about it.

- So, how old are you, about 22?. - No, I'm 19.

- Whoa. - Butthanks forthe compliment.

I didn't mean you looked old..

- Mint?. - Please.

- How old do you think I am?. - I don't know, maybe..42?.

- 42?. No, actually I'm 35. - Oh. Sorry.

That's okay. Most people think I look youngerthan 35.

- If I'm wearing a sweatshirt. - I can see that.

That's how I usually dress. More youthful than this, anyway.

So you've got yourwhole life ahead of you. What do you want to do?.

I don't know, I only know I want to really live, you know?.

I want to try out whatever I feel like doing.

Right now, I want to travel.

To Peru or Brazil.. I like horseback riding.

A friend and l, a girl I went to school with, I thought we might..

-..go riding somewhere. - Do you take the horse with you?.

- Right - take a horse on a plane. - Well, it can't be easy to find one.

I'm sure we can rent them there.

- It's barely visible. - lsn't it?. Yes it is.

Good.

Show off the lace.

Yeah.

I'll raise the camera a little.

Check this out.

- I'm like, "Ooo." - Look at that.

Get ready, get ready..

That's cute.

Let's try this.

- Like a doll.. - You or me?.

You.

- My hair looks so dark. - Your hair is not dark.

- Here, compare here and here. - That's 'cause it's on your skin.

That's all it is.

My eyelids are shiny.

- It's cute. - No, it's not cute.

- Why do you look good and not me?. - I don't look good.

Yes, you do.

Great that they're all turning out so nice..

It's nice when the pictures are so good. Hear how positive I am?.

- You're a real pessimist. - What's that?.

- You're negative all the time. - I just wish I photographed well.

- But you do. - No, I don't.

You do too. I'll hit you if you say it again.

I don't..OW. Brat.

You're like, "I'm so ugly.'. ' It's your attitude that's ugly.

- What should I say?. - You're pretty. You are.

- Mum taught me not to lie. - But you are pretty.

- No I'm not, no I'm not. - You are, you are.

Does everyone understand?. No questions?.

Then I'll bring her in.

You can come in now.

There.. Can you stand here?.

We're going to do an exercise. I'm going to show you some pictures.

Each picture has two lines. Point to the one you think is longest.

Which line do you think is the longest here?.

That one?. What does the class say?.

What do you say?.

- This one. - That's the longest?.

- Does everyone think so?. - Yeees.

It's not easy to see.

Try this one.

That one?. No?..What do you say?.

This one.

- Do you all think so?. - Yeees.

Okay now, take your time.

Look closely. Which line is longest?.

- Do you think that's the longest?. - Not really.

You think the other one is longer, but you picked this one. Why?.

- Because everyone else does. - That's right. Take your seat.

Do you know what we did when you were outside?.

We decided to disagree with you.

You can go in now.

So now we're all happy. All happy in the back of the coach.

We're having fun in the back of the coach

What?. What do you mean don't laugh?. You're laughing.

Are you wrong in the head?.

- Seriously, go get it. - "Seriously, go get it.."

- I mean it, go get it. - "l mean it.."

Jeez, don't get your knickers in a twist.

- Rile him up. - Take it.

Screw that.

There it is.

What the hell is with you?.

- Now now, chill out. - What?. You're the one who..

- Sit down. - Wrestling in the aisles..

- Yeah, but you took it. - Hey, you took my cap first.

- Surfing. I want to learn to surf. - Yes, thatwould be nice.

Hang out on the beach all day and party all night.

Get out of here and away from boring people.

Me too. I want to get away and have new experiences.

- Where to?. - Just away.

I've just been through a gruelling divorce;, I'd like to get away.

I understand.

It was really something. It was like two weeks ago.

- Wow, that's recent. - It feels like a long time.

I get home from work and the house is practically empty.

She took almost everything.

In the kitchen I find a note from my wife;.

"I'm taking the children, we're leaving you"..bla bla bla.

So she met someone else and just left.

I was completely.. Itwas the worst thing that's ever happened to me.

I spent a week in bed - at least. I couldn't get up, just kept crying.

Lucky for me I had my brother.

He lives close by.

So I could go there and eat and be with his family. I even slept there.

So after that first week I got back on my feet.

- And now I'm here, two weeks later. - Hard to believe.

- And I don't show it, do l?. - No, not at all.

Do you have a boyfriend?.

- Would you break up in a note?. - No, never.

- You just don't do that. - No, it's immature behaviour.

Yeah..I thought so too.

It's so incomprehensible. We've known each otherfor eight years.

You'd think the least she could do is talk about it if she's not happy.

That's true of any relationship. Just leaving a note is unbelievable.

I think so, anyway. I have it here;, I'll show you.

Look at the last sentence. I don't even get it. Do you, as a girl?.

It doesn't even fit with the previous sentence.

It's as if she wasn't in her right mind when she wrote it.

I.. I don't know, maybe she..

Maybe you understand how she thinks?. Maybe girls think differently.

D'you think?.

- I wouldn't treat anyone like this. - No, but maybe you..

- Maybe you can interpret it?. - l..

- Shouldn't you call and ask?. - The medical hotline?.

- I can't call the medical hotline. - Why not?.

If I say, "My husband was hit by a rocket" they'll say to bring him in.

- Then he has to go in. - He refuses.

- It's not possible. - Of course it is.

What do we do, drag him into the car?.

Mother and I were sick one week, stayed home from work and school

We rented lots of films, I got tons of candy, and she drank rum and cola

We had fun all day while others toiled away

When father came home from his shift we innocently coughed and sniffed

That was really nice. And funny.

- ltwas very good. - And now you know the whole story.

- Here I thought you drank the rum. - He's blamed you all along.

- You're blamed for Mum's sins. - You're blamed for everything.

- I don't mind. - Oh, that's good.

Damn you're hot.

- Come on, let's dance. - No.

Ow. What are you doing. Knock it off. Ow.

Look at them instead.

Come on, hottie.

Oo, porn stars.

- Come on now. - No.

Come on, dance.

Shit.

Turn the music off.

Turn it off. You moron.

All overthe rug. Mum's going to kill me when she sees this.

- Damn you.. - You know I laugh when I'm upset.

You're so stupid.

- Look atthis bloody big stain. - It's notthat bad.

What do we do?.

What's in the drink?. I bet it tastes just as awful as last time.

- Sorry, Sara, you suck at drinks. - No, this is the best ever.

- Thanks. Gimme five. - Why are you making faces?.

- That's disgusting. - No, it's great.

- Don't break the window. - I'm leaving.

- With my witch's brew?. - I'm going with your "witch".

Bye bye. Oops, I dropped the "witch".

- What are you doing?. - I'm speaking Swinglish.

What is it?.

- Johnny. - Johnny boy.

Hottie.

Roger. Ha, his name is Roger. Roger, you listen to me.

- Rogerrr. - Roger rocks.

Hey.

Lars. Lasse. Lasse. Hey, Lasse.

- Is your name Lasse?. - No.

So what is your name?. I justwondered.

Itwould be nice to know. Can't you tell us?.

- Say your name, say your name.. - Kenneth.

- His name is Kenneth. - Wazzup, Kenneth.

- Can we call you Kenta?. - Kent Agent.

We'll just have to call him that. So, Kenta. Having fun?.

- Mmm. - There now, cheer up.

- What are you doing?. Did he answer?. - I'm sitting here.

- What are you doing?. - We're fucking, can't you tell?.

- We're just.. - Is that a new mobile phone?.

It's nice. You can use it to take pictures of us beauties.

Lovely phone, lovely view, and lovely girls - babes.

Loverly babes, izzat somefink for you?.

Take our picture, then. Kenta, Kenta, Kenta..

Come on, K.. Woohoo.

I'm sure itwill be gorgeous.

- What did it cost, Kenta?. - Let me take a picture of you two.

- Here, take this. - Pose for us, Kenta.

- Pose with the hottie. - Let's be models.

Smile now, look happy.

Smile now, open up. That's better.

- And smiiile. - Gorgeous.

- Move your flab. - What flab?.

- So, Kenta, young man.. - "Young man"?.

Old man.

Can't you buy us some alcohol?. Of course you can.

Suit and all. Nice.

- I put one ball under my tie. - I have it out underthe suit..

-..so it pops outwhen I stand up. - You've got it all planned, Leffe.

- How is yourwife doing?. - She's justfine.

- And the kids?. - Everything's fine.

- You lease your car, Leffe?. - Yes.

- I could switch to a new one today. - You've got a 2005?.

- 2005 or 2006, I'm not sure. - You don't even know?.

- Estate car?. - Estate racing car.

You know the 307 I had before the car I had before this one?.

- A sporty silver one?. - Yeah. It handles the same way.

The suit goes with the car, but the car doesn't suit you. A family car.

Where you going, Leffe?. You can't drive - you're drunk, man.

- Let's go join the others. - Why don't we stay and talk?.

- What do you want to talk about?. - I just wanna give you a hug, man.

Now you're pushing me again. What is it?.

Why can't we stand here?. You're on top.

What the.. Leffe?. Cool down now..

- Straight up the crack. - Don't you like that?.

It's all dry now. The pants sucked it all up.

So your pants are wet?. Mine are always wet, but in front.

- Come on. - Hang on a second..

I was thinking before.. Ugh, you're being a pain.

- Can'twe just stand and breathe?. - I don't knowwhat you're..

Just let me go down the stairs..

- Promise you'll stay and talk. - Of course.

What I wanted to say is, you're so genuine.

- Come off it now. - What, you don't believe me?.

Of everyone I know, the people I know best, my best friends.

- You're the truly genuine one. - So are you.

I promise you, I'll say the same thing tomorrow.

- If that will make you believe me. - I believe you, but..

- What are you getting at?. - I mean, I'm a little drunk now.

Trying to distract me by grabbing my balls?.

- Don't you believe me?. - Yes..

- I don't know. - What the heck was it called?.

There's a priest with a grown-up daughter who comes to him-

- and he didn't know she existed..

- Do you know it?. - No, not really.

What was the name of that film we saw when we were in Stockholm?.

- Not this time, but last time. - What film was that?.

- We saw it in Stockholm. - A Swedish film?.

- Not "A Second Chance"?. - No.

There's an actor with a northern dialect.

- Dark, handsome..Andree. - You mean Leif Andree.

That's the one. Only it's not him.

He plays a priest, who has a grown-up daughter-

- and one day she comes into his house..

He's remarried, has three kids and one on the way..she comes..

..and..

You don't know the one I mean?. Itwas really good, you'd like it.

It has a meaning, a message.

Sounds good..

Hi again. Have you all had enough to eat?.

I thinkwe're all here. If your seatmate is missing, tell me now.

We don'twantto leave anyone behind. No one?. Good.

We'll be leaving soon, but first our coach driver has a few words.

I just want to say that every time I make a stop at this lay-by..

..I inspect the coach.

Today I discovered something sad.

You're welcome to play music and make noise-

- but I can't accept that passengers damage the coach.

What's happened, then?.

It's something in the toilet.

Something's been broken in the toilet. It doesn't matter what.

I don't know how you act at home, but on my coach there are rules.

- Have any of us been to the toilet?. - No.

- What's broken?. - Just a curtain rod.

It doesn't really matter what. This is a little family business.

- Losses affect us personally. - I see, but we didn't do anything.

I'm sorry for your family, but I didn't break your coach.

No, no, I'm not accusing anyone. I just think it's common courtesy..

-..to admit having done something. - You approached us. I'm insulted.

- Be that as it may, it's poorform. - Bloody poorform.

- Your job is driving. - It's pointless talking.

He's a total dumbass.

Ladies and gentlemen..

I think this is poorform. I think whoever did it should confess.

I don't think I feel like driving on until I find outwho did it.

Nexttime it might be something affecting the safety of the coach.

That's why we're going to stay here until someone comes forward.

He can't be serious.

Drive the coach.

- Mo-ron. - Start the coach, you arsehole.

Dad..?.

Yes?.

- Dad?. - Yes..

- What are you doing?. - I realised..

I realised we had..Grappa thatwe bought in ltaly last summer.

Dad, why don't you sit down?. You look kind of dizzy.

- Ow. - Oh, Dad..

I'm OK. Have you seen all the space since we put in geothermal heating.

- Careful now.. - You should have been here.

They just cut the furnace into bits. Zip, zip. Really efficient.

- If you lay a banger in your hand. - Why would I do that?.

Listen. If you lay it in your hand and set it off, guess what happens.

Nothing. There's a little heat, maybe a tiny mark, but that's all.

But if you hold it like this, then you're in trouble.

- What's that got to do with.. - Thomas, explain.

This "explosion" isn't even an explosion; it has no force at all.

- Those rockets fly high. - It's flash powder, it's harmless.

- What is this flash powder?. - It looks like more than it is.

- What.. - It has no explosive..

- It's like a sparkler. - I've never heard of flash powder.

- It gives off light, that's all. - It's like a sparkler.

It's not as explosive as it looks.

Rockets fly way up high. How can there be no force in them?.

- It exploded on the ground. - But it had the same force.

It's a burning force, not a propulsive force.

- If it hits you in the head.. - Eva, listen now.

-..it's completely harmless?. - You get so scared of everything.

And you lose your objectivity.

- Objectivity?. I don't think.. - Darling..

I've been doing this since I was a kid. It's not dangerous at all.

- Axel, stop. Slow down, what is it?. - I'll deal with this.

You calm down now.

Stay there now. Take it easy.

- Ulf, go easy on him. - I said I'd deal with this.

What kind of nonsense is this. I said I wanted no trouble.

No. I said calm down.

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