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1
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For any great parent, one good look
2
00:00:03,031 --> 00:00:06,265
is all you need to tell
what your kids have been up to.
3
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Ah, really?
4
00:00:09,590 --> 00:00:11,757
I just changed you at half time.
5
00:00:11,827 --> 00:00:14,461
Sometimes, you barely have
to look at all.
6
00:00:14,563 --> 00:00:16,930
Uh-uh-uh! Did you wash your hands?
7
00:00:16,999 --> 00:00:18,965
- Yep.
- Uh-uh-uh!
8
00:00:19,034 --> 00:00:20,033
Lick your fingers.
9
00:00:20,102 --> 00:00:21,067
Caught in a lie.
10
00:00:21,136 --> 00:00:22,502
Mm-hmm. Yeah, thought so.
11
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Other times, things require
a more careful eye.
12
00:00:26,341 --> 00:00:28,241
- Hey.
- Hi.
13
00:00:28,310 --> 00:00:30,877
Show me both of your hands
at the same time.
14
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Slowly.
15
00:00:37,553 --> 00:00:39,519
Would you believe
I'm defending your honor?
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No.
17
00:00:41,990 --> 00:00:44,825
And then, there are times
18
00:00:44,860 --> 00:00:48,195
when you can't believe
what you're seeing is true.
19
00:01:03,846 --> 00:01:05,011
Bow.
20
00:01:05,113 --> 00:01:07,080
What?
21
00:01:07,149 --> 00:01:08,114
Did you see that?
22
00:01:08,217 --> 00:01:09,883
See what?
23
00:01:11,753 --> 00:01:13,039
Junior's [bleep].
24
00:01:16,158 --> 00:01:19,059
Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx
www.addic7ed.com
25
00:01:22,631 --> 00:01:25,365
How do you know he's... active?
26
00:01:25,467 --> 00:01:26,766
Did he tell you?
27
00:01:26,869 --> 00:01:28,268
He didn't have to tell me.
28
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There's only one thing that
will make a boy walk like that.
29
00:01:30,772 --> 00:01:33,139
My baby boy!
30
00:01:33,242 --> 00:01:34,474
Oh, my gosh!
31
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We need to celebrate.
32
00:01:36,078 --> 00:01:37,310
Make a turkey, Bow.
33
00:01:37,412 --> 00:01:39,379
I don't know why,
but it just feels right!
34
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I have so many questions.
35
00:01:40,983 --> 00:01:42,249
When did this happen?
36
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As soon as she said yes.
37
00:01:43,585 --> 00:01:44,618
Where did this happen?
38
00:01:44,686 --> 00:01:45,986
The same place she said yes.
39
00:01:46,088 --> 00:01:47,454
I can't believe he didn't tell me.
40
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Junior talks to me about everything.
41
00:01:50,225 --> 00:01:51,391
Not this.
42
00:01:51,493 --> 00:01:53,426
It's just not something that
boys bring to their mothers.
43
00:01:53,528 --> 00:01:55,195
Mama! Guess what!
44
00:01:57,499 --> 00:02:00,100
Yeah! I can see it in your walk!
45
00:02:00,202 --> 00:02:02,969
Ha ha! Let Mama make you a turkey.
46
00:02:04,172 --> 00:02:05,302
Well, at least his first time was
47
00:02:05,388 --> 00:02:07,140
with someone that he's in
a long-term relationship with.
48
00:02:07,242 --> 00:02:09,442
- I mean, even if it is Megan.
- My man.
49
00:02:09,511 --> 00:02:10,810
Ew. Dre.
50
00:02:10,913 --> 00:02:13,280
- What?
- This isn't a "my man" moment.
51
00:02:13,348 --> 00:02:15,315
This is the ultimate "my man" moment.
52
00:02:15,417 --> 00:02:17,017
It's his rite of passage.
53
00:02:17,119 --> 00:02:19,853
- Y... You know what?
- Hmm?
54
00:02:19,955 --> 00:02:22,422
We need to focus on what's important.
55
00:02:22,457 --> 00:02:24,791
That is... That is a very
healthy way of looking at this.
56
00:02:24,893 --> 00:02:26,893
Like what sides we're going
to have with the turkey.
57
00:02:26,995 --> 00:02:28,395
Can you forget the turkey, please?!
58
00:02:29,564 --> 00:02:30,964
Hey.
59
00:02:31,033 --> 00:02:35,235
Those scarves aren't from that
Harry Potter heresy, are they?
60
00:02:35,337 --> 00:02:39,406
The only boy wizard I want to
know about was born in a manger.
61
00:02:39,474 --> 00:02:42,008
It's okay, Grandma. It's not blasphemy.
62
00:02:42,110 --> 00:02:45,211
Our friend Mason's grandmother,
Nana Jean, made them for us.
63
00:02:45,314 --> 00:02:46,780
Yeah. She is so fun.
64
00:02:46,882 --> 00:02:50,317
She knits, does crafts,
and her food is amazing.
65
00:02:50,385 --> 00:02:52,686
Wait a minute.
Who is this Nana Jean food, now?
66
00:02:52,788 --> 00:02:54,754
It's nice to finally have
authentic Korean,
67
00:02:54,856 --> 00:02:56,723
not some sorry excuse from a food truck.
68
00:02:56,825 --> 00:02:58,391
Oh. Do you want to try some bulgogi?
69
00:02:58,493 --> 00:03:00,727
Do I look like I want
to try some bulgogi?
70
00:03:00,829 --> 00:03:02,862
What do you kids need this stranger for?
71
00:03:02,965 --> 00:03:05,298
You have one grandmother! That's enough!
72
00:03:05,400 --> 00:03:09,202
Um, you're forgetting
Mom's mom, Grandma Alicia.
73
00:03:09,304 --> 00:03:10,770
Am I?
74
00:03:12,040 --> 00:03:16,076
Okay, so you have one good grandmother.
75
00:03:16,144 --> 00:03:19,346
So don't be bothering
with this Nana Jean anymore.
76
00:03:19,448 --> 00:03:22,682
Wait a minute. What's that?
77
00:03:22,784 --> 00:03:25,819
A soy-scallion marinade?
78
00:03:28,023 --> 00:03:30,090
Smells stupid.
79
00:03:30,192 --> 00:03:34,461
I told Bow I wouldn't celebrate
Junior's news, and I didn't...
80
00:03:34,529 --> 00:03:36,262
where she could see me.
81
00:03:38,767 --> 00:03:41,401
Opa!
82
00:03:41,470 --> 00:03:44,637
Dre, I could tell by the way
you walked in here today...
83
00:03:44,740 --> 00:03:46,706
- Mm-hmm.
- ...that your son was having sex!
84
00:03:46,808 --> 00:03:49,009
I am so proud.
85
00:03:49,111 --> 00:03:50,710
You know, is...
is it wrong to celebrate?
86
00:03:50,812 --> 00:03:53,046
Because Bow acted like it was wrong.
87
00:03:53,115 --> 00:03:55,115
- No!
- No, it is not wrong!
88
00:03:56,818 --> 00:03:58,451
Celebrating your son's deflowering
89
00:03:58,520 --> 00:04:00,920
is one of the true joys of fatherhood.
90
00:04:00,989 --> 00:04:03,189
Hey, I remember when Connie manned up.
91
00:04:03,258 --> 00:04:05,959
Boy. Yeah, we had to fire the
nanny and get a new pool table,
92
00:04:06,061 --> 00:04:08,061
but, my God, was I proud!
93
00:04:08,163 --> 00:04:10,163
- Yeah.
- Good for Junior.
94
00:04:10,232 --> 00:04:13,033
Eustace, he still gets
nervous around girls.
95
00:04:13,135 --> 00:04:14,367
And horses.
96
00:04:14,436 --> 00:04:16,736
The horses I can understand,
because they're people
97
00:04:16,805 --> 00:04:18,071
who have been put under spells.
98
00:04:18,173 --> 00:04:20,073
But girls?
99
00:04:20,142 --> 00:04:21,708
- They're just people.
- Mm.
100
00:04:21,777 --> 00:04:23,476
To Junior. For making it happen.
101
00:04:23,578 --> 00:04:24,911
- Yeah.
- Yeah!
102
00:04:25,013 --> 00:04:26,613
Yes. Congratulations, Dre.
103
00:04:26,715 --> 00:04:28,581
I hope it was as satisfying
for the girl as it is for you.
104
00:04:28,650 --> 00:04:30,083
Oh, my God, Lucy!
105
00:04:30,152 --> 00:04:32,719
We're talking about the man's
son losing his virginity.
106
00:04:32,788 --> 00:04:34,320
It has nothing to do with women.
107
00:04:34,389 --> 00:04:35,422
Well, yes, it does.
108
00:04:35,457 --> 00:04:37,991
When Junior has sex,
the girl has sex, too.
109
00:04:38,093 --> 00:04:40,593
Obviously, Lucy, women have sex.
110
00:04:40,695 --> 00:04:42,128
Not a concession. Hard fact.
111
00:04:42,197 --> 00:04:44,731
You know, but I think a guy's first time
112
00:04:44,800 --> 00:04:46,933
can only be understood by another guy.
113
00:04:47,035 --> 00:04:48,068
- That's true.
- Yeah.
114
00:04:48,136 --> 00:04:49,436
Like, the first time I bought condoms.
115
00:04:49,504 --> 00:04:52,839
I was so nervous
that I put half of the store
116
00:04:52,908 --> 00:04:54,374
on the counter as a distraction.
117
00:04:54,409 --> 00:04:57,444
And only a guy can understand
118
00:04:57,479 --> 00:04:59,379
how my first time
was all about my father.
119
00:04:59,448 --> 00:05:02,015
See, my father was cheating
on my mom with the nanny,
120
00:05:02,117 --> 00:05:04,551
so I slept with the nanny
and got her fired.
121
00:05:04,653 --> 00:05:07,353
And I see the cycle that I'm in.
122
00:05:07,422 --> 00:05:08,988
I remember my first time.
123
00:05:09,091 --> 00:05:10,523
Oh, for God's sakes, Lucy!
124
00:05:10,625 --> 00:05:12,625
No one wants to hear
about how you gave it away.
125
00:05:12,727 --> 00:05:13,793
Now, come on.
126
00:05:13,862 --> 00:05:15,795
- Let's really celebrate, huh?
- All right.
127
00:05:15,897 --> 00:05:17,764
Put that away.
128
00:05:17,866 --> 00:05:21,634
And if Grandma asks,
you were at the library.
129
00:05:21,670 --> 00:05:24,003
Library, huh?
130
00:05:24,106 --> 00:05:26,639
What book did you check out, Jack?
131
00:05:26,708 --> 00:05:28,241
Uh... the Bible.
132
00:05:28,310 --> 00:05:31,010
Literally could have said
any other book.
133
00:05:31,113 --> 00:05:33,346
This is grandma lipstick.
134
00:05:33,415 --> 00:05:36,783
I thought we agreed we were done
with this Nana Jean character!
135
00:05:36,852 --> 00:05:39,652
But today we made piggy banks
out of recycled coffee cans!
136
00:05:39,688 --> 00:05:41,754
What kind of sicko buys coffee in a can?
137
00:05:42,928 --> 00:05:47,244
Now, I can't see why a
grown woman with no legal obligation
138
00:05:47,329 --> 00:05:48,761
wants you two around.
139
00:05:48,864 --> 00:05:50,396
Now, don't get me wrong.
140
00:05:50,499 --> 00:05:53,233
You're... You're my grandbabies,
and I love you,
141
00:05:53,301 --> 00:05:55,468
but you're real boring company.
142
00:05:55,537 --> 00:05:57,804
But Nana Jean says
she likes seeing the world
143
00:05:57,873 --> 00:05:58,938
through our young eyes.
144
00:05:59,007 --> 00:06:00,874
Yeah, she finds us interesting.
145
00:06:00,976 --> 00:06:02,108
You two?
146
00:06:02,177 --> 00:06:04,144
What's interesting about you two?
147
00:06:04,246 --> 00:06:06,913
You just had to get
that goodbye kiss, didn't you?
148
00:06:07,887 --> 00:06:09,182
- Hey.
- Hey.
149
00:06:09,251 --> 00:06:11,184
I'm just finishing up what
we should cover with Junior.
150
00:06:11,286 --> 00:06:12,252
Uh...
151
00:06:12,354 --> 00:06:13,753
What's there to talk about?
152
00:06:13,822 --> 00:06:15,588
Our son is sexually active.
153
00:06:15,657 --> 00:06:18,825
We need to make sure he's
going about it the right way.
154
00:06:18,894 --> 00:06:20,226
Then we're all set, babe.
155
00:06:20,295 --> 00:06:22,462
I already had the sex talk with him.
156
00:06:22,497 --> 00:06:25,165
I appreciate all
this advanced dating advice,
157
00:06:25,233 --> 00:06:27,367
- but there's other stuff.
- Mm. Okay.
158
00:06:27,435 --> 00:06:29,602
I heard some kids talking about "oral"?
159
00:06:29,704 --> 00:06:31,571
I would stay away from that.
160
00:06:31,640 --> 00:06:34,040
You know... kid like you
with wheat allergies.
161
00:06:34,142 --> 00:06:36,809
Junior having sex
162
00:06:36,912 --> 00:06:40,580
is proof that my talk worked.
163
00:06:40,682 --> 00:06:41,948
Okay.
164
00:06:42,050 --> 00:06:45,318
Not to take away from the
effectiveness of your talk...
165
00:06:45,420 --> 00:06:47,153
- Which clearly worked.
- Yes.
166
00:06:47,255 --> 00:06:48,888
But there's a difference
167
00:06:49,024 --> 00:06:50,356
between theory and practice, Dre.
168
00:06:50,392 --> 00:06:51,958
And we want to make sure
that Junior is okay,
169
00:06:52,060 --> 00:06:54,227
that he is using protection...
170
00:06:54,262 --> 00:06:57,964
because for all we know,
Megan is trying to trap him.
171
00:06:57,999 --> 00:07:02,268
Only a guy can understand
where Junior is, Bow.
172
00:07:02,304 --> 00:07:04,571
Trust me, it's not a conversation
173
00:07:04,673 --> 00:07:06,773
a boy wants to have with his mom.
174
00:07:06,875 --> 00:07:10,443
You tell me you used protection,
I'll bake you a pie.
175
00:07:10,478 --> 00:07:11,611
Mm-hmm.
176
00:07:11,713 --> 00:07:14,581
It's a wonder
you can function at all, Dre.
177
00:07:14,649 --> 00:07:15,715
I'm headed over to Megan's.
178
00:07:15,817 --> 00:07:16,916
- See you guys later.
- Okay.
179
00:07:17,052 --> 00:07:18,251
Okay, okay, I will let you
have this one, Dre,
180
00:07:18,320 --> 00:07:19,619
but you got to warn Junior
about gonorrhea,
181
00:07:19,721 --> 00:07:21,221
super gonorrhea, and gold diggers.
182
00:07:21,289 --> 00:07:22,922
- Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. I got it. I got it.
- Okay, okay. N...
183
00:07:23,024 --> 00:07:25,491
Oh, hey. There he is!
184
00:07:27,162 --> 00:07:28,328
My man!
185
00:07:29,664 --> 00:07:30,964
So...
186
00:07:31,066 --> 00:07:32,432
you good?
187
00:07:32,534 --> 00:07:34,200
Yeah.
188
00:07:34,302 --> 00:07:35,368
Huh.
189
00:07:35,437 --> 00:07:36,302
Wrapping it up?
190
00:07:36,404 --> 00:07:37,570
Yep.
191
00:07:37,672 --> 00:07:39,272
My man.
192
00:07:43,011 --> 00:07:43,977
That's it?
193
00:07:44,045 --> 00:07:46,713
Bow, that was the best conversation
194
00:07:46,815 --> 00:07:49,048
that Junior and I have ever had.
195
00:07:49,150 --> 00:07:50,783
Dre, you didn't say anything.
196
00:07:50,885 --> 00:07:53,853
So, our son is having sex.
197
00:07:53,955 --> 00:07:55,555
Boys will be boys.
198
00:07:55,657 --> 00:07:56,956
Boys will be boys?
199
00:07:57,058 --> 00:07:58,424
I'm not gonna come down hard on him
200
00:07:58,526 --> 00:08:00,460
just because he's getting it in.
201
00:08:00,562 --> 00:08:01,828
You might be right, Dre.
202
00:08:01,930 --> 00:08:03,029
Mm-hmm.
203
00:08:03,131 --> 00:08:06,232
- Boys will be boys.
- Mm-hmm.
204
00:08:06,334 --> 00:08:09,135
And girls will be girls.
205
00:08:09,237 --> 00:08:10,703
Why did you say that?
206
00:08:10,772 --> 00:08:12,305
No reason.
207
00:08:12,407 --> 00:08:14,674
Oh!
208
00:08:14,743 --> 00:08:18,978
Maybe we should get a turkey for Zoey.
209
00:08:20,148 --> 00:08:22,148
Why would we do that?
210
00:08:22,250 --> 00:08:24,350
Because she earned it.
211
00:08:26,154 --> 00:08:29,050
Wait. What?
212
00:08:29,363 --> 00:08:30,573
Zoey's [bleep].
213
00:08:54,416 --> 00:08:55,948
Going to the Sunken Place
214
00:08:56,051 --> 00:08:57,750
didn't get you out of grocery shopping,
215
00:08:57,852 --> 00:09:01,154
and it's not gonna get you out
of this conversation.
216
00:09:04,728 --> 00:09:06,071
Maybe she's pranking you.
217
00:09:06,126 --> 00:09:09,547
You know, college kids,
they... they love pranking.
218
00:09:09,610 --> 00:09:10,842
It's not a prank.
219
00:09:10,911 --> 00:09:13,645
She and I have spoken several times.
220
00:09:13,747 --> 00:09:16,415
- Several?
- Zoey is having sex!
221
00:09:18,085 --> 00:09:19,251
We should celebrate!
222
00:09:20,454 --> 00:09:21,853
Give me a high five, Dre! Come on!
223
00:09:21,955 --> 00:09:23,989
Get the champagne! She da man!
224
00:09:24,091 --> 00:09:24,856
♪ Zoey ♪
225
00:09:24,925 --> 00:09:25,657
♪ Is ♪
226
00:09:25,759 --> 00:09:26,491
♪ Da man ♪
227
00:09:26,560 --> 00:09:27,893
- Huh! Huh! Huh!
- Stop it!
228
00:09:27,995 --> 00:09:28,894
Ahh.
229
00:09:28,962 --> 00:09:30,862
She's my little girl!
230
00:09:30,964 --> 00:09:32,197
Why didn't she tell me this?
231
00:09:32,299 --> 00:09:34,199
She talks to me about everything.
232
00:09:34,225 --> 00:09:36,380
Would you have wanted to have
this conversation with her?
233
00:09:36,419 --> 00:09:39,504
No! But I wanted her to believe
that at least she could.
234
00:09:39,573 --> 00:09:41,340
- Mm-hmm.
- And if she ever brought it up,
235
00:09:41,442 --> 00:09:43,275
I would pretend to get
an emergency work call.
236
00:09:43,310 --> 00:09:45,210
Who is this guy, anyway?
Huh? Are they in love?
237
00:09:45,245 --> 00:09:46,511
Because if they're in love,
then they'll get married,
238
00:09:46,613 --> 00:09:47,579
and there won't be another guy.
239
00:09:47,648 --> 00:09:48,880
I think I can live with that.
240
00:09:48,949 --> 00:09:51,383
- Well, they were serious.
- Okay.
241
00:09:51,418 --> 00:09:53,318
But they broke up since then.
242
00:09:53,420 --> 00:09:55,320
And he left her on the side of the road
243
00:09:55,389 --> 00:09:57,255
like a busted old water heater?
244
00:09:57,358 --> 00:09:59,524
Zoey is not a water heater.
245
00:09:59,626 --> 00:10:02,260
She is a sexual being.
246
00:10:02,363 --> 00:10:04,463
No, she's not! She's my daughter!
247
00:10:04,531 --> 00:10:06,965
I'm a sexual being,
and I'm someone's daughter.
248
00:10:07,034 --> 00:10:08,734
And I would hope your father
would have had the decency
249
00:10:08,836 --> 00:10:10,469
to be disgusted by that.
250
00:10:15,576 --> 00:10:18,076
My little girl...
251
00:10:18,178 --> 00:10:19,211
she's gone.
252
00:10:19,266 --> 00:10:20,990
Diane?!
253
00:10:21,068 --> 00:10:22,781
No.
254
00:10:22,883 --> 00:10:24,483
Zoey. She's...
255
00:10:24,551 --> 00:10:26,251
she's been with a man.
256
00:10:26,286 --> 00:10:29,388
Oh, I'm so sorry, Dre.
257
00:10:29,490 --> 00:10:30,689
You know what?
258
00:10:30,724 --> 00:10:33,325
Take the day, the week,
whatever you need.
259
00:10:33,394 --> 00:10:34,860
- Oh, my God.
- Oh!
260
00:10:34,928 --> 00:10:36,728
- Okay.
- Hi. Yeah.
261
00:10:36,830 --> 00:10:39,197
Quick question.
Might you be overreacting?
262
00:10:39,233 --> 00:10:40,999
I mean, Zoey taking control of her body
263
00:10:41,068 --> 00:10:42,234
is actually a good thing.
264
00:10:42,336 --> 00:10:44,436
- What?
- You whore.
265
00:10:44,471 --> 00:10:47,539
We are talking about the man's daughter!
266
00:10:47,608 --> 00:10:49,608
When my candle company takes off,
267
00:10:49,710 --> 00:10:51,410
I am so out of here.
268
00:10:51,478 --> 00:10:52,844
What Dre needs right now
269
00:10:52,880 --> 00:10:57,182
is some way to salvage his
daughter's soiled reputation.
270
00:10:57,251 --> 00:10:59,618
Mm. So, we talking time machine.
271
00:10:59,653 --> 00:11:02,120
I know a guy, but he sold it.
272
00:11:02,189 --> 00:11:04,556
Maybe I can buy it back
from the guy he sold it to,
273
00:11:04,658 --> 00:11:08,860
go back in time, and then
borrow it from my friend.
274
00:11:08,896 --> 00:11:10,695
You know what, Dre?
Forget your daughter.
275
00:11:10,764 --> 00:11:13,665
- She's damaged goods.
- Yeah, tappin' out.
276
00:11:13,767 --> 00:11:15,066
Hey, do us a favor.
277
00:11:15,135 --> 00:11:16,802
Bring us back some kettle corn,
will you, sweetheart?
278
00:11:16,870 --> 00:11:18,003
Die in a fire.
279
00:11:18,071 --> 00:11:19,905
Thank you.
280
00:11:23,410 --> 00:11:24,876
Did you come
in here to eat your feelings
281
00:11:24,945 --> 00:11:26,478
about your daughter having sex?
282
00:11:26,547 --> 00:11:27,612
'Cause I'm eating my feelings
283
00:11:27,681 --> 00:11:29,247
about being called a whore at work.
284
00:11:29,349 --> 00:11:30,449
Again.
285
00:11:30,484 --> 00:11:34,953
It was so much fun talking
about my son having sex.
286
00:11:35,022 --> 00:11:38,423
It's ruined now that I know
that Zoey's doing it, too.
287
00:11:39,827 --> 00:11:42,294
Oh, 'cause seeing it
through your daughter's eyes
288
00:11:42,362 --> 00:11:44,955
made you realize that women are people?
289
00:11:44,986 --> 00:11:45,919
Exactly.
290
00:11:46,021 --> 00:11:47,354
It's so weird!
291
00:11:47,389 --> 00:11:49,422
What I think is weird
is how men only seem
292
00:11:49,524 --> 00:11:51,358
to care about a woman's point of view
293
00:11:51,426 --> 00:11:53,126
when they suddenly remember
they have a daughter.
294
00:11:53,195 --> 00:11:54,594
I do care about women.
295
00:11:54,629 --> 00:11:56,696
All I was doing was celebrating my son.
296
00:11:56,732 --> 00:11:58,498
And what about the father
of the guy Zoey was with?
297
00:11:58,600 --> 00:11:59,799
Can he celebrate his son?
298
00:11:59,868 --> 00:12:00,934
Where is that son of a bitch?
299
00:12:01,002 --> 00:12:02,202
I'll celebrate him.
300
00:12:02,237 --> 00:12:05,205
I know that sounded festive,
but I meant it as a threat.
301
00:12:05,273 --> 00:12:06,373
Uh-huh.
302
00:12:06,475 --> 00:12:09,509
How about you help me
kill this cake instead?
303
00:12:13,348 --> 00:12:16,683
You know, I never realized
304
00:12:16,752 --> 00:12:19,619
that every girl is somebody's Zoey.
305
00:12:19,688 --> 00:12:21,454
Yeah.
306
00:12:21,523 --> 00:12:24,457
That's why getting through
the day is so hard here.
307
00:12:24,493 --> 00:12:26,459
The way the men in that conference room
308
00:12:26,561 --> 00:12:27,994
talk about women?
309
00:12:28,029 --> 00:12:30,363
It's so demoralizing.
It's like they're monsters.
310
00:12:30,432 --> 00:12:32,265
Hey, hey. Wait a minute.
311
00:12:32,334 --> 00:12:34,801
I'm in that conference room.
312
00:12:34,903 --> 00:12:37,704
Am I a monster?
313
00:12:37,773 --> 00:12:39,205
You're like monster adjacent.
314
00:12:40,409 --> 00:12:42,208
- I'll take that.
- But you don't have to be.
315
00:12:42,244 --> 00:12:43,443
And neither does Junior.
316
00:12:44,946 --> 00:12:47,113
Junior.
317
00:12:47,182 --> 00:12:48,715
I've told him all the wrong stuff.
318
00:12:48,784 --> 00:12:50,583
- I got to go.
- Yeah, oh... You...
319
00:12:50,685 --> 00:12:51,618
Or you could stay here
320
00:12:51,720 --> 00:12:53,286
and help me change the culture...
321
00:12:53,355 --> 00:12:56,556
Ah, forget it. This is
what I get for voting for Trump.
322
00:12:59,628 --> 00:13:01,394
Nana Jean means well.
323
00:13:01,463 --> 00:13:02,962
Please don't drag her into the street.
324
00:13:03,031 --> 00:13:06,065
Don't you worry about
your only grandmother.
325
00:13:06,101 --> 00:13:09,335
She hasn't shown you
all the tricks up her sleeve.
326
00:13:10,705 --> 00:13:11,738
It's punching.
327
00:13:11,807 --> 00:13:13,573
The trick up her sleeve is punching.
328
00:13:13,642 --> 00:13:16,643
Jack! Diane!
329
00:13:16,711 --> 00:13:18,511
And you must be Ruby.
330
00:13:18,547 --> 00:13:20,280
I've heard so much about you.
331
00:13:20,382 --> 00:13:25,452
Wonhung-i habachuln-i
peonchi, Nana Jean.
332
00:13:25,554 --> 00:13:28,254
The sounds you just made
were not Korean,
333
00:13:28,356 --> 00:13:30,857
and I found it incredibly offensive.
334
00:13:30,959 --> 00:13:32,826
Please, come in.
335
00:13:32,928 --> 00:13:35,161
I understand you wanting
336
00:13:35,197 --> 00:13:37,297
to be protective of Jack and Diane.
337
00:13:37,365 --> 00:13:40,633
Grandchildren are a precious gift.
338
00:13:40,702 --> 00:13:42,602
Mm-hmm.
339
00:13:42,671 --> 00:13:45,205
So, you're just a kind, old grandma
340
00:13:45,273 --> 00:13:47,207
who spends time with children
341
00:13:47,275 --> 00:13:50,710
and thinks they have good things to say.
342
00:13:50,779 --> 00:13:53,346
Well, I smell a rat.
343
00:13:53,415 --> 00:13:56,149
Where's the real Nana?
344
00:13:57,452 --> 00:13:59,052
Nana Jean? We're bored.
345
00:13:59,120 --> 00:14:00,653
Can we make gingerbread houses?
346
00:14:00,755 --> 00:14:02,489
- Please?
- Gingerbread?
347
00:14:02,557 --> 00:14:04,657
That's a December craft.
348
00:14:04,693 --> 00:14:08,127
There's no wrong time
of the year to make a memory.
349
00:14:08,230 --> 00:14:09,095
This bitch...
350
00:14:09,197 --> 00:14:10,196
- Grandma?
- Uh-huh?
351
00:14:10,265 --> 00:14:12,165
Can we stay and make memories? Please?
352
00:14:12,267 --> 00:14:13,800
Well, if you stay, you're gonna miss
353
00:14:13,902 --> 00:14:16,669
my famous Double-Bacon Mac-n-Cheese.
354
00:14:16,705 --> 00:14:19,606
Well, we prefer
lighter Korean flavors now.
355
00:14:19,708 --> 00:14:21,374
Okay.
356
00:14:21,476 --> 00:14:22,475
- Let's go.
- All right.
357
00:14:22,544 --> 00:14:23,743
- Bye.
- All right, kids.
358
00:14:23,812 --> 00:14:25,378
Why don't you join us, Ruby?
359
00:14:25,480 --> 00:14:26,980
Because
360
00:14:27,048 --> 00:14:30,717
I know when somebody's trying
to steal my grandbabies.
361
00:14:30,819 --> 00:14:34,220
And I'm pretty sure it was you
362
00:14:34,322 --> 00:14:38,992
who held a gun on me
during the riots, Jean.
363
00:14:39,060 --> 00:14:41,628
You had your shot,
and you didn't take it.
364
00:14:41,730 --> 00:14:44,030
But I took your TV.
365
00:14:46,868 --> 00:14:48,401
- Hey!
- Hey.
366
00:14:48,503 --> 00:14:51,538
So, I just wanted to...
367
00:14:51,609 --> 00:14:53,148
You know,
368
00:14:53,211 --> 00:14:55,875
- you usually talk to me about stuff.
- Mm-hmm.
369
00:14:55,977 --> 00:15:00,914
And your father's talk was, um...
370
00:15:01,016 --> 00:15:02,315
brief.
371
00:15:02,384 --> 00:15:03,850
So I-I just wanted to make sure
372
00:15:03,919 --> 00:15:05,485
that you and Megan felt like...
373
00:15:05,554 --> 00:15:07,720
Oh, don't... don't worry about that.
374
00:15:07,822 --> 00:15:09,022
Megan and I broke up.
375
00:15:09,124 --> 00:15:10,290
What?
376
00:15:10,325 --> 00:15:11,457
What do you mean, you broke up?
377
00:15:11,526 --> 00:15:12,692
You just had sex.
378
00:15:12,794 --> 00:15:13,993
Yeah, but we were...
379
00:15:14,095 --> 00:15:15,929
Junior, does that feel right to you?
380
00:15:16,031 --> 00:15:17,530
To use her for sex
381
00:15:17,599 --> 00:15:20,333
and then dump her
like a busted water heater?
382
00:15:20,402 --> 00:15:21,601
Water heater?
383
00:15:21,670 --> 00:15:23,369
That poor Megan!
384
00:15:23,471 --> 00:15:25,238
You hate Megan.
385
00:15:25,340 --> 00:15:27,240
This isn't about Megan, Junior.
386
00:15:27,342 --> 00:15:29,842
Mom, you don't understand.
It was mutual.
387
00:15:29,911 --> 00:15:32,645
It is never mutual.
388
00:15:32,747 --> 00:15:34,247
She just said that to save face.
389
00:15:34,349 --> 00:15:35,748
That poor girl!
390
00:15:35,850 --> 00:15:37,650
My God, she must be devastated.
391
00:15:37,752 --> 00:15:39,018
You took her flower.
392
00:15:39,120 --> 00:15:42,255
Junior, Daddy made you a monster.
393
00:15:42,357 --> 00:15:43,370
- Wha...
- Yeah. Yes.
394
00:15:43,432 --> 00:15:44,457
- You know what he did?
- What?
395
00:15:44,526 --> 00:15:49,062
He dumped sweet Megan
396
00:15:49,164 --> 00:15:51,264
as soon as he got what he wanted.
397
00:15:51,366 --> 00:15:52,398
Yeah.
398
00:15:52,500 --> 00:15:54,334
That is not how it went down.
399
00:15:54,436 --> 00:15:55,768
You have to fix this!
400
00:15:55,837 --> 00:15:57,303
What am I supposed to do?
401
00:15:57,405 --> 00:15:58,972
You're gonna act like any honorable man,
402
00:15:59,040 --> 00:16:00,106
and you're gonna get back with her.
403
00:16:00,208 --> 00:16:01,140
- Mm-hmm.
- Mm-hmm.
404
00:16:01,242 --> 00:16:02,175
Strictly for appearances.
405
00:16:02,980 --> 00:16:05,480
She is not an object, son.
406
00:16:05,806 --> 00:16:07,471
- She is a girl.
- Yeah.
407
00:16:07,524 --> 00:16:09,382
Well, now she's a woman...
408
00:16:09,417 --> 00:16:11,184
- Oh, my God!
- ...thanks to him.
409
00:16:11,286 --> 00:16:12,518
What is happening?
410
00:16:12,554 --> 00:16:13,853
I'll tell you what's happening, Junior,
411
00:16:13,955 --> 00:16:17,557
is that you are going to beg Megan
412
00:16:17,626 --> 00:16:18,825
- for her forgiveness.
- Mm-hmm.
413
00:16:18,927 --> 00:16:23,296
Do you have any idea how Megan's
dad is feeling right now?
414
00:16:23,365 --> 00:16:25,431
- Rob?
- Yes, Junior.
415
00:16:25,533 --> 00:16:28,034
Your actions affect more than just you!
416
00:16:28,136 --> 00:16:29,402
You know what?
417
00:16:29,471 --> 00:16:31,437
I'm gonna need Rob's address.
418
00:16:31,539 --> 00:16:33,873
Yeah, and I'm gonna send him
some Omaha Steaks
419
00:16:34,009 --> 00:16:37,710
to make up for the terrible
things we said at work today.
420
00:16:37,812 --> 00:16:39,879
You talked about this at work?
421
00:16:39,948 --> 00:16:41,114
Does he have a nickname?
422
00:16:41,216 --> 00:16:43,282
Robbie? Robbo?
423
00:16:43,385 --> 00:16:44,651
This is crazy.
424
00:16:44,753 --> 00:16:47,220
- You are going to call Megan...
- Yeah.
425
00:16:47,288 --> 00:16:49,689
...and make it right, you monster.
426
00:16:49,791 --> 00:16:53,026
Now get... out.
427
00:16:55,130 --> 00:16:57,063
But this... this is my room.
428
00:16:57,165 --> 00:16:58,381
Get out of here!
429
00:17:02,451 --> 00:17:05,919
Why's there so much kimchi
in our refrigerator?
430
00:17:05,967 --> 00:17:08,200
Hey. Hold on!
431
00:17:08,841 --> 00:17:09,774
Did you call Megan?
432
00:17:09,842 --> 00:17:11,742
Did she accept our apology?
433
00:17:11,811 --> 00:17:13,893
- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah. I called her.
434
00:17:13,918 --> 00:17:14,807
Good.
435
00:17:14,832 --> 00:17:17,078
And she did not want
to get back together.
436
00:17:17,150 --> 00:17:18,082
Oh.
437
00:17:18,151 --> 00:17:19,250
Which was not a surprise,
438
00:17:19,319 --> 00:17:21,185
because she's the one who dumped me.
439
00:17:21,287 --> 00:17:22,218
- What?
- What?
440
00:17:22,288 --> 00:17:23,788
Wait. Junior.
441
00:17:23,890 --> 00:17:26,290
- You said it was mutual.
- Mm-hmm. Yeah.
442
00:17:26,392 --> 00:17:28,025
I lied to save face.
443
00:17:28,094 --> 00:17:30,895
But I got more information
about why she dumped me,
444
00:17:30,997 --> 00:17:32,430
so, you know, worth it!
445
00:17:32,532 --> 00:17:33,664
- What happened?
- What happened?
446
00:17:33,733 --> 00:17:35,633
It was just college-acceptance sex.
447
00:17:35,702 --> 00:17:37,401
She got into Northwestern
448
00:17:37,470 --> 00:17:40,171
and wanted to lose
her virginity before she left.
449
00:17:40,239 --> 00:17:42,106
Also, apparently I'm clingy.
450
00:17:42,175 --> 00:17:44,542
- Yeah. That's your fault.
- I know.
451
00:17:44,644 --> 00:17:46,210
Hey, Junior.
452
00:17:46,279 --> 00:17:48,112
Why didn't you tell us, sweetheart?
453
00:17:48,181 --> 00:17:50,715
Because getting dumped after
having sex for the first time
454
00:17:50,783 --> 00:17:52,049
isn't a great feeling.
455
00:17:52,109 --> 00:17:53,050
- Right.
- Yeah.
456
00:17:53,119 --> 00:17:55,586
Of course not.
457
00:17:55,655 --> 00:17:57,555
Did you hear that, Bow?
458
00:17:57,624 --> 00:17:59,367
- Yeah.
- You blew it.
459
00:17:59,430 --> 00:18:00,436
I...
460
00:18:03,062 --> 00:18:04,161
- Oh.
- Grandma!
461
00:18:04,230 --> 00:18:05,663
- We're in trouble.
- What?
462
00:18:05,765 --> 00:18:07,264
Nana Jean sent us on a rock hunt.
463
00:18:07,333 --> 00:18:09,066
And we found this great throwing rock.
464
00:18:09,168 --> 00:18:12,069
Then we shattered Janine's car window.
465
00:18:12,138 --> 00:18:13,537
Kind of by accident?
466
00:18:13,606 --> 00:18:15,806
I didn't think I'd throw it that far.
467
00:18:15,875 --> 00:18:17,475
Nana Jean says we have to be honest
468
00:18:17,543 --> 00:18:18,776
and take the consequences.
469
00:18:18,811 --> 00:18:20,177
Oh, she does?
470
00:18:20,213 --> 00:18:22,279
Ruby, one of these kids
shattered my window.
471
00:18:22,382 --> 00:18:23,748
The little Asian boy did it.
472
00:18:23,850 --> 00:18:25,483
Face your consequences, kid.
473
00:18:25,585 --> 00:18:26,584
Well, then your parents are gonna have
474
00:18:26,653 --> 00:18:27,918
to write me a really big check.
475
00:18:27,954 --> 00:18:29,253
I'm gonna make an example out of you.
476
00:18:29,322 --> 00:18:30,521
J-Janine, wait!
477
00:18:30,623 --> 00:18:31,822
Mason...
478
00:18:31,891 --> 00:18:34,225
Also drew the nipples
on your garden gnomes.
479
00:18:34,327 --> 00:18:36,627
The whole point
is that they're nonsexual!
480
00:18:36,663 --> 00:18:38,598
Oh, you're gonna fry for
this, young man!
481
00:18:38,653 --> 00:18:39,897
- Wait! You guys, no!
- Bye.
482
00:18:39,999 --> 00:18:42,266
Nana Jean says always be loyal!
483
00:18:43,903 --> 00:18:45,069
Grandma.
484
00:18:45,104 --> 00:18:46,771
The way you sold him out?
485
00:18:46,806 --> 00:18:49,340
Psh. I'm learning from the master.
486
00:18:49,409 --> 00:18:51,242
We're sorry we turned our backs on you
487
00:18:51,296 --> 00:18:53,310
for exotic food and off-season crafts.
488
00:18:53,413 --> 00:18:56,547
Oh, I know you are, babies.
489
00:18:56,616 --> 00:18:59,417
Now, how many grandmothers do you have?
490
00:18:59,485 --> 00:19:00,430
- One.
- One.
491
00:19:00,486 --> 00:19:01,552
That's right.
492
00:19:01,654 --> 00:19:02,820
Give me a big hug.
493
00:19:02,955 --> 00:19:05,256
Are we still friends with Mason?
494
00:19:05,358 --> 00:19:08,659
No, baby.
495
00:19:08,761 --> 00:19:10,761
He's dead to you.
496
00:19:10,863 --> 00:19:12,697
Cool.
497
00:19:15,501 --> 00:19:16,467
Babe...
498
00:19:16,536 --> 00:19:20,071
taking a step back, I realize
499
00:19:20,139 --> 00:19:23,374
that we handled our conversation
with Junior poorly.
500
00:19:23,409 --> 00:19:26,143
We were calling him a monster,
and we were the monsters.
501
00:19:26,212 --> 00:19:28,045
We were.
502
00:19:28,114 --> 00:19:31,716
I know I'm supposed to say
that I treat my son
503
00:19:31,818 --> 00:19:34,185
and my daughter,
when it comes to sex, equally,
504
00:19:34,287 --> 00:19:36,087
but I can't.
505
00:19:36,155 --> 00:19:37,455
I thought I could.
506
00:19:37,523 --> 00:19:40,091
Then I heard that Junior and Megan
507
00:19:40,159 --> 00:19:41,759
broke up right after they had sex,
508
00:19:41,828 --> 00:19:43,427
and I was brought back to high school,
509
00:19:43,563 --> 00:19:45,362
where it was all about reputation.
510
00:19:45,465 --> 00:19:48,733
I called virginity a "flower."
511
00:19:48,801 --> 00:19:50,801
- Oh. Yeah. You did.
- Ugh!
512
00:19:50,870 --> 00:19:53,003
How are we supposed to end
this double standard
513
00:19:53,106 --> 00:19:58,909
if I, one of the most
enlightened people in the world,
514
00:19:59,011 --> 00:20:00,778
still has it?
515
00:20:00,880 --> 00:20:02,079
Okay, babe.
516
00:20:02,181 --> 00:20:05,273
Well, we may not be able
to end the double standard
517
00:20:05,335 --> 00:20:06,607
- in the world...
- Mm.
518
00:20:06,671 --> 00:20:09,286
...but we could do
a little better in our house.
519
00:20:09,388 --> 00:20:10,454
Mm-hmm.
520
00:20:10,523 --> 00:20:13,457
Say something more to Junior
than "wrap it up."
521
00:20:13,559 --> 00:20:14,494
Yeah.
522
00:20:14,560 --> 00:20:15,926
I'm gonna come with you this time.
523
00:20:16,028 --> 00:20:17,394
- Good call.
- Yeah.
524
00:20:17,463 --> 00:20:19,096
'Cause "wrap it up" was all I had.
525
00:20:19,198 --> 00:20:21,532
We got to be gentle with Junior.
526
00:20:21,601 --> 00:20:24,935
He just got dumped by a monster.
527
00:20:25,037 --> 00:20:25,970
- Mm.
- Aah!
528
00:20:26,072 --> 00:20:27,671
I've got to cancel those steaks.
529
00:20:32,281 --> 00:20:34,425
Oh. Hello, Ruby.
530
00:20:34,459 --> 00:20:35,985
Are Jack and Diane home?
531
00:20:36,040 --> 00:20:37,375
It's 10:30.
532
00:20:37,409 --> 00:20:38,544
They're still at school.
533
00:20:38,576 --> 00:20:39,878
Good.
534
00:20:39,911 --> 00:20:41,546
Because I'd hate
to have them see me drag
535
00:20:41,579 --> 00:20:43,214
their grandmother into the street.
536
00:20:43,248 --> 00:20:45,183
There it is!
537
00:20:45,217 --> 00:20:46,886
I knew it!
538
00:20:46,919 --> 00:20:49,388
You think it's cool
to sell out my grandson
539
00:20:49,421 --> 00:20:50,722
to that sad divorcée?
540
00:20:50,756 --> 00:20:53,392
Then I got bad news for you.
541
00:20:53,424 --> 00:20:55,728
And I do remember you from the riots.
542
00:20:55,760 --> 00:20:57,595
I should have taken the shot.
543
00:20:57,629 --> 00:20:59,098
Come for me, bitch.
544
00:20:59,131 --> 00:21:01,166
Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx
www.addic7ed.com
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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