Original subtitles

( Humming "March" From "The Nutcracker Suite" )

Hi. Is The Cake Done Yet?

I'm Putting The Finishing Touches On.

Your Grandparents Are Coming Just To See You.

And You're Sure They Like Chocolate?

They Love Chocolate.

( Buzzer )

I Got To Go Get The Dryer.

Watch This While I'm Gone And Don't Eat Any.

I Don't Even Like Chocolate.

You Sure?

Yes.

Okay, I'll Be Right Back.

Okay.

You Tried To Eat The Whole Thing?

No.

I'm Looking At Somebody Who Looks To Me

To Be A Cake Thief.

The Wind Blew It.

It Does Come Through Here Hard, Doesn't It?

Well, I'm Sorry.

But I Think What I'm Looking At

Is Somebody Who Tried To Steal A Cake.

I Can Count To Ten In Spanish.

Uno, Dos, Tres...

No, That Little Cute Stuff Doesn't Work On Me.

And If Mrs. Huxtable

Comes Up Here And Sees That

She Is Going To Put You Away--

Far Away

For Defacing Dessert.

I'm Sorry.

I Just Wanted A Little Taste.

Really?

Keep An Eye Out Before She Comes.

How We Doing?

Good.

Keep An Eye Out Now.

What About The Hole?

Hole?

No Problem.

Ah, Boy.

There You Go.

Now Just Go Ahead.

Olivia.

He Did It.

Well, Of Course He Did It.

Where Did This Cake Come From?

What Have You Done?

Oh...

When The Time Comes

This Is What You Two Will Be Having For Dessert.

Mr. And Mrs. Kendall.

It's Nice To See You Again.

Ugh.

Mom, Dad, How Was Your Trip From Milwaukee?

Hey, Mom.

Hey, Dad.

Hi, Sweetheart.

Hi.

I Put This On

For Your Mom And Dad.

So That's What You're Wearing.

Don't You Like It?

Yeah, I Think It's Great.

But When You See The Gift That I Have For You

I Think You'll Want To Make A Quick Change.

Oh, A Present.

Baby, If I Could Afford To

This Room Would Be Filled With Lavish Presents Every Day.

So What Do You Think?

It's, Um...

It's So Well Made.

I Knew You'd Love It.

I Don't Think I'll Wear It, Though.

I'll Just Put It Away For Something Special

Like Dinner At The Base.

Oh, You Can Wear It Then, Too.

But It Would Really Make Me Happy

If You Would Wear It Today.

I Want To Wear This.

You Can Wear That.

Just Put This Over It.

I Know What's Going On.

You Want Me To Cover Up

Because Your Parents Think I Dress Weird.

Your Parents Think I'm Weird.

Why Would They Think That?

They Only Met You Once, For 20 Minutes.

Time Enough For Your Mom Not To Like Me.

Where Did You Get That Idea?

From You.

I'm Quoting You, "My Mother Can't Stand You."

Okay.

Maybe That's What She Said.

But I Think You Two Can Get Along.

She's Really A Very Sweet Person.

Okay, I'll Put It On.

If We Start Getting Along

I'm Taking This Sweater Off!

Fine, Fine.

Now See, Look.

Isn't That A Beautiful Sweater?

Honey, That Look...

Is You.

I'm Feeling Much Less Nervous Now.

Thank You.

Denise?

What?

Are You Wearing These Earrings?

Don't You Like Them?

No, I Do.

But It's My Mother.

Your Mom Won't See Them, Okay?

( English Accent ) You're Right, Darling.

These Are Much Better.

Denise.

Ta-Ta.

Denise!

Come Back Here.

( Doorbell Ringing )

Grampy, Nu-Nu.

Hello, Sweetheart.

Peaches.

Yay!

Hello. I'm Lorraine.

Hello, Olivia.

Help Me Take My Coat Off.

Don't Let It Touch The Ground.

May I Take Your Coat?

Thank You.

You Got Here Sooner Than We Expected.

This Man Wouldn't Stop At A Hotel.

Left The Bags In The Car.

Hey, Hey!

What's Happening, Captain?

Hey, Son.

Hey, Mom.

There's My Boy.

Mmm.

Good To See You.

Good To See You.

Have A Seat.

Denise.

Hi, Mom.

Hi, Dad.

Hi, Hon.

Denise?

Hi.

Good To See You.

Good To See You Both.

How Do You Like Being A Mom?

Oh, Um...

I Think It's Going Really Well, Don't You?

I'm Still Alive.

She Loves To Make That Joke.

I Have Cheese

And Crackers Inside.

Thank You.

I'll Come Help You.

Don't Be Silly.

Your In-Laws Have Come To See You.

I'll Help You.

Denise, It's Just Cheese And Crackers.

Okay.

Olivia?

Yes.

You Did A Lovely Job With My Coat.

Thank You, Grampy.

And Here's A Dollar For All The Hard Work.

Joel, Put That Back.

No, Give It To Me.

I Paid For The Cheese.

Is There Something Going On Between You And Martin's Mother?

Nothing.

She's Here From Milwaukee.

It's Great.

This Is Me You're Talking To.

I Can Only Say

That There's Friction Between Her And Me.

That's Not So Uncommon.

Mothers Are Very Protective Of Their Sons.

I Went Through

A Similar Thing With Your Grandmother.

This Is Different, Okay?

Martin's Mother

Can't Stand Me.

Did She Face You And Say, "I Can't Stand You"?

No.

She Said It To Martin.

She Did?

Martin's Told Me Twice His Mother Can't Stand Me.

She Thinks I'm A Flake.

Can You Believe That?

She Only Knew Me For 20 Minutes.

I Didn't Do Anything.

I'm Trying To Make This Marriage Work...

Why Would She Go Behind Your Back?

I Didn't Tell You What She Said To Me.

When We Met, She Said

"I Hope You Don't Approach Your Marriage

Like You Did College."

Martin Made Me Put On This Sweater.

Oh, Really?

Hungry, Are You?

I Don't Blame Your Husband.

I Wouldn't Feed You Either.

Where's The Cheese And Crackers?

The Hors D'oeuvres Have To Wait.

Mom Wants To Talk To Martin's Mom.

Give My Dollar Back, Please.

Olivia, Come On.

We're Going To The Store To Get Some Stuff.

What Stuff?

I Don't Need Anything At The Store.

Yes, You Do.

Are We Going For Candy?

No.

What Are We Going For?

What Do We Need?

People Seem To Be Clearing Out Of Here Fast.

Yeah, I Wonder Why Your Wife And My Wife

Are In There Talking To Each Other, Alone.

I Think I Know What It Is.

My Son Told Me That My Wife

Made Some Remarks About Your Daughter

Which My Son Foolishly Told Denise.

What Kind Of Remarks?

My Son Said That My Wife Said

That She Can't Stand Your Daughter.

I'm Guessing That Your Daughter Told Your Wife

What My Son Said My Wife Said.

So My Wife Just Found Out

What Your Son Said That Your Wife Said.

You Said It.

Word.

This Is Such A Beautiful Kitchen.

Imagine A Fireplace.

Such A Lovely Touch.

I Always Thought Of New Yorkers

Living In Small Apartments

But This Is A Big, Beautiful Home.

Thank You.

I Don't Think You Need Any Help.

I'll Go Spend Some Time With Olivia.

Mrs. Kendall?

Please, I'm Lorraine.

Lorraine.

Yes.

Could We Sit?

Lorraine...

My Daughter Is Not Comfortable With You.

I Sensed Something Was Going On.

Martin Told Her What You Said.

You Said You Can't Stand Denise.

I Would Never Say That.

Martin Said You Did.

Let Me Start By Telling You

About Martin's First Marriage.

Fresh Out Of Annapolis, He Had To Get Married

To This Beautiful, Intelligent Girl Named Paula.

This Was Probably

The First Girl Martin Ever...

Okay.

About A Year Goes By And Olivia's Born

And Paula Decides

She Doesn't Want To Be A Wife And Mother Anymore

And Goes Away.

When Martin Brought Your Daughter Home

I Was So Upset

I Took Him Aside And Said

"Son, I Can't Stand This."

I'm Talking About The Way He Goes Off And Gets Married

Without Any Thought.

It Has Nothing To Do With Denise.

I Was Angry With Martin.

Boy, You Have Been Misquoted.

Misquoted And Misunderstood.

These Two Should Be Thankful They Have Mothers

Who Put Up With Them.

I Thank You.

We Are The Best Things That Ever Happened To Them.

Just Wait Until This Sweet, Precious, Little Olivia

Starts Giving The Same Aggravation They're Giving Us.

Let's Get On Our Knees

Right Now And Pray.

Let's Pray Olivia Grows Up And Comes Home One Day

With Three Husbands, Four Children

And A Dog.

See Now, The Primary Function Of This Is The Basement.

But This Is The Only Place

Where I Can Get Complete Privacy.

Because Of The Offspring Repellant.

Offspring Repellant?

Things Like Tools That Require A Person Make Some Work, See?

Look Around, There's Nothing Soft.

All These Chairs, This Is All Wood.

Oak, You See.

There's No Place That A Kid Can Roll On The Floor

With His Girlfriend

Or The Boyfriend.

And This Is My Baby.

Record Player.

Needs A Quarter On The Arm

To Keep It From Sliding Across.

And The Speaker's Just Mono.

Hey, Dad.

Are You Still Giving Your Tour?

We're Finished.

Mom's Serving Appetizers In The Living Room.

Tell Her "No, Thanks."

We're Going To Watch T.V. And Listen To Records.

Want To Join Us?

No! No!

( Door Slamming )

See?

Offspring...

Repellant.

Thank You.

What Kind Of Music You Play

On That Phonograph?

( Whistling )

This Would Be Perhaps

The Greatest Jazz Collection In The World.

What You're Looking At Is Hawkins.

You Have Prez, Ahmad Jahmal.

You Can Go Back To Louis Armstrong.

Go Ahead Back.

Coltrane.

Please.

Rahsaan Roland Kirk!

Ah-Ha!

Any Jazz Album You Want To Listen To

I Have It Here, My Friend.

Bet You Haven't Heard This One.

Try Me.

Lester "Motormouth" Sutton.

Live At The Pigfoot.

I Have It.

I Was There.

You're Kidding.

The Front Row.

No.

Motormouth Was Blowing A Solo

And The Band Was Cooking!

I Wish I'd Been There.

Remember Those Dances We Used To Do?

Oh, Sure.

The Slop.

Please.

The Stroll.

Yes.

The Madison.

Yes

And The Birdland.

Birdland?

You Had To Get A Short Woman For This.

You Put Her On This Thigh Here.

A Wop-De-Wop.

Hey, Wop-De-Wop.

Womp, Womp.

A Wop-De-Wop.

Wow, Wow.

De-Wop-De-Wop.

Those Men Have Been Down In That Basement

An Awfully Long Time.

Yes, They Have.

But That's Because Cliff Thinks

Nobody Likes To Go Down There But Him.

Little Doth He Know When He's Not About

I Am Down There, Listening To Those Albums.

Hi, We're Back From The Store.

Is It Okay That We're Back?

Where's Olivia?

Outside, Playing With Vanessa And Rudy.

I'm Really Pleased To See You Back.

I Take It Everything Went Well.

It Certainly Did.

We Got To The Bottom Of Things.

That's Where We Found You.

I Beg Your Pardon.

You Told Denise

That I Can't Stand Her.

And That's Not True.

It's Not? It's Not?

No, It Isn't.

I Was There When You Said It.

I'm Sure You Were, But Your Ears Weren't.

You Don't Listen.

I Told You

I Don't Like You Doing Things Without Thinking.

I Have Nothing Against Denise.

I Don't Even Know Denise.

As Far As I'm Concerned

I Think Denise Is A Lovely Person.

You Do?

Yes, We're Going To Be Very Good Friends.

Friends, Oh.

You And Me?

You And Me.

Mom!

And To Think, Martin.

You Had Me Upset With Your Mother--

This Lovely Woman.

I Know...

You Made Me Wear This

Because Your Mom Couldn't Stand Me.

You Made Her...

Take That Off.

That's Not You.

Thank You.

Listen, Can I Say Something?

No, You Cannot. Don't Say Anything.

Yeah, But...

( All Speaking At Once )

Yes, Yes.

( Record Scratching )

Huh?

Hey, How About

Moody's Mood For Love?

1952, Recorded By King Pleasure.

I Had It

And I Just...

Wore It Out.

You Call Yourself A Jazz Collector.

You Want Moody's Mood For Love, 1952 Version?

Uh-Huh.

I'll Sing It For You.

♪ There I Go, There I Go ♪

♪ There I Go ♪

♪ Pretty Baby, You Are The Soul ♪

♪ Who Snaps My Control ♪

♪ Such A Funny Thing, But Every Time You're Near Me ♪

♪ I Never Can Behave ♪

♪ You Give Me A Smile And Then I'm Wrapped Up In Your Magic ♪

♪ Music All Around Me ♪

♪ Crazy Music ♪

♪ Music That Keeps Calling Me So Very Close To You ♪

♪ Turns Me Your Slave ♪

♪ Come And Do With Me ♪

♪ Any Little Thing You Want To ♪

♪ Anything, Baby, Just Let Me Get Next To You ♪

Clair: ♪ Am I Insane ♪

♪ Or Do I Really See ♪

♪ Heaven In Your Eyes? ♪

♪ Bright As Stars That Shine Up Above Me ♪

♪ In The Clear, Blue Skies ♪

All: ♪ How I Worry About You ♪

♪ Just Can't Live My Life Without You, Baby ♪

♪ Come Here, Don't Have No Fear ♪

♪ Oh, Is There Wonder Why ♪

♪ I'm Really Feeling ♪

In The Mood For Love.