Original subtitles

- Are you ready, kids?

kids: Aye, aye, Captain!

- I can't hear you.

kids: Aye, aye, Captain!

- * Ohh... *

* Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? *

kids: SpongeBob SquarePants!

- * Absorbent and yellow and porous is he *

kids: SpongeBob SquarePants!

- * If nautical nonsense be something you wish *

kids: SpongeBob SquarePants!

- * Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish *

kids: SpongeBob SquarePants! - Ready?

all: SpongeBob SquarePants!

SpongeBob SquarePants!

SpongeBob SquarePants!

- SpongeBob

SquarePants!

[laughing]

* *

[waves crashing]

* *

- You are traveling through an aquatic dimension.

A dimension not only of laughs and giggles,

but of uncontrollable nose milk.

When things start to get coocoo,

there's a pretty good chance you may have

just entered "The Tidal Zone!"

- And we're back!

[together] Yay!

- Our next guest on "The Patrick Show"

are the wonderfully talented Captain Quaaa...

Quaaa...

[growling]

Ahh!

- Captain Quasar and Pat-Tron!

[cheers and applause]

[spaceship beeping]

all: Ahh!

- Welcome to the show, fellas.

Cool spaceship.

Where are you guys from?

- Um, outer space.

- Out her face?

- No. Just outer space.

- Well, better out than in!

[laughter]

- [zapping]

- Oh! Ooh!

- Pat-Tron, I told you to turn off your laugh track.

It always strips his gears.

- Don't worry, folks.

I can fix it.

- Ha-ha-ha-ha, Ha-ha-ha-ha.

- [grunting]

I can't fix it!

Let me out!

- Evacuating robo-bowels.

- Ooh, I got something stuck to my melon.

- That's my shrink ray.

I thought I lost that.

- Ooh!

- Ahh! It's making my head all spicy!

Ahh!

- Stop! Give me back my shrink ray!

- Ahh!

- Hola, my little chatty show hosts.

- Ahh! Ahh! Ahh!

- Who wants to order a pizza?

- Ahh-- Ooh.

I'll take a large with pineapple and potpourri.

both: Ohhh!

- Here you go.

- [squeaking]

[all gasping]

- Um, fear not, studio audience.

I will unshrink them with the growth ray I have in my ship.

- Woo...hoo?

- Wow.

Our house is gigantic now!

Oh, here's my gum!

- And so cinematic.

- It's cine-gigantic!

Is that even a word?

- Ha, don't be retupulous, Bunny, of course not.

Being small is gonna be fun-gigantic!

Last one to the big, stinky sock is a rotten fish egg!

- Hey, good one, Dad!

- [laughs] Shall we?

both: * Small, small, small, small, small, small, small *

* *

- Diminutive.

- [laughs] Yee-haw!

Whoo-hoo!

- Tiny.

- Puny.

- [laughs] Whoa!

- Itty-bitty.

- Whoo! - Whoo-hoo!

- Teensy-weensy.

- Small.

- Ahh.

Lovely. - [barking]

[together] Ahh!

Not now, Tinkle!

[laughter]

- I wish GrandPat were here to enjoy this.

- Hee-hee! Ahh!

- Hello! - Ahh!

[electronic beeping]

- [laughs] Ooh!

Ha-ha-ha!

Oh!

Can't an old man play violent video games in peace anymore?

Grr!

Water?

[grumbling]

[laughter]

- We got shrunk.

- Hey, GrandPat!

- Can you get us some tiny towels?

- Vermin?

I'll get you with my bug spray breath!

[munching]

[exhales]

- GrandPat! No!

- Hey! Where'd they go?

[all shouting]

- You'll be safe in here, Stars.

- Whew. That was a close shave.

Thank you for saving us.

- Yeah.

We apologize for GrandPat.

He thinks we're vermin.

- Yeah. Like you.

- No worries.

We were just sitting down to eat our roasted peppermint.

- It's not much, but we're willing to share it with you.

- Share what?

- Patrick! Manners!

- Minty. [doorbell ringing]

- I'll get it!

Ooh, I do hope it's more guests.

Boop.

both: Ooh!

Ahh!

- I see you!

- GrandPat?

- To survive in the wild, we find it best to stay

out of family squabbles.

Dartfishes, scatter!

Ahh!

- Ahh... - Grr!

- Ooh, take that! - Ahh!

- GrandPat scared our new friends away.

This time he's gone too far.

- Then I guess his beloved family is gonna

have to teach him a lesson.

- That's us, right?

What?

- Ooh, all this pest-huntin' is making me hangry.

Let's see here.

[mumbling]

both: Cake molds away!

- Huh?

Why you--

Gah! Ahh! Achoo!

Ahh!

Why those little--

Ahh!

Grr. Ahh!

Revenge of the vermin, eh?

Ahh.

Ohh!

You! Ahh!

Ohh! Ohh!

Oh! Oh! Ahh! Ahh!

- Whoa-ho-ho! Ahh! Ahh! Augh!

Ohh, these insects are smarter than my family.

That's it! No more Mr. Nice Geezer!

Dentures, go get 'em!

[together] Ahh!

- Hi.

I am Rube-dor.

I shrunk you down with my futuristic

shrink suckers to save you from harm.

- Thanks, Rube-dor.

- And to introduce you to the shimmering, shiny city

of Shmandor.

[together] Ooh.

- Shmandor is the place to be.

Shmandor has fine dining,

spacious homes,

a state-of-the-art transit system,

shopping centers.

And conveniently located under the sea,

Shmandor is entirely made of hand-blown glass.

[together] Amazing.

- Oh, boy, can we live here?

- Sure, we can, kids.

Shmandor is so beautiful, it makes me feel like...

* Singing *

- Hold on!

There's no singing allowed in Shmandor!

And that's why!

- Yuck.

Who wants to live in a place where you can't sing?

* That was a close one *

- * And here comes a closer one *

[together] Ahh!

- We're too small to be run over.

- Whew. - Ha-ha.

- Now, where would I hide if I was a filthy flea?

- I think it's time to resume GrandPat's lesson.

- I picked this one up inside Pat-tron.

- Whoa! Guh! Ohh!

My scooter is haunted!

Ahh!

[panting]

Ha!

Ahh!

Ohh! Ahh!

Aha!

Quit spookin' my wheels or I'll roast you ghosts!

Ahh!

Egypt? I love Egypt!

Ohh! Ahh!

Ugh!

But I hate mummies!

I gotta get home!

- [giggles] That was fun, but what if we're

too small for the audience to see us?

- Hey, guys, look what I found.

Jumbo Grow plant food!

- Be careful! - It's time to grow up!

- Now I can see the fine print, Patrick.

It grows plants, but it shrinks people.

You shrunk us down to the sub-atomic

teensy-weensy level.

- Ohh, now I'll never finish tonight's show.

- Stay together, Stars.

I think there's a way out of here!

[all shouting]

- Look, we're home.

Everything's back to normal.

Right?

[together] Right!

- Ahh! Except the Moon is a big eyeball now.

all: Ahh!

- Micro-critters are fascinatin'.

How can be they be so sophisticated

when they're so dang little?

Heh! Glad no one's watchin' me.

[belching]

- Ahh!

[spooky music]

- Grandma Frenchy always said "Don't sweat the small stuff."

And in this small world, where good things

come in small packages, it's no small wonder

that it's the little things that mean a lot.

Especially in the wee small hours of "The Tidal Zone."

Ahh!

[upbeat electronic music]

* *

[eerie music]

- Imagine if you will,

the town of Bikini Bottom.

Now imagine if everyone who lived there was a robot.

Submitted for your approval,

a trip to Binary Bottom.

[whirring]

[beeping]

[beeps]

[foghorn blares]

[yawns]

- I'm re-re-ready. I'm re-re-ready.

I'm re-re-ready.

I'm red-red-ready.

[whirring]

[beeping]

Morning, SpongeBot!

Ooh, you're looking handsome today!

Mwah!

Aww!

[giggles]

[grunts]

Ahh! [munching]

- Meow.

- Good--good--good morning, Robo-Gary.

[munching]

[gulps]

- Mroww!

[meowing] - [laughs]

Oh, you wanna play.

I know what you want.

- [meowing]

- Gary, be gentle with the little laser!

- [growling]

- Ehh.

[beeping]

[foghorn blares] - Oh!

Time for work, Gary.

I'll play with you more when I get home.

- Aww. [vocalizing]

Ah! - Ooh!

- Meow.

- No, no, Gare-bearings.

You have to stay here at home.

[clank] [sad foghorn blares]

- Meow?

[chiming]

- A little more to the left.

[mischievous music]

Almost there.

P-p-p-perfect!

See you later, G-G-G-Gary.

- [sighs] Finally,

someone whose company I actually enjoy--

me!

- Ha ha ha. - Ha ha ha.

- Ha ha ha.

- Time for work, Squidbot!

[siren wailing] Time for work, Squidbot!

Time for work, Squidbot! Time for work, Squidbot!

- [grumbles] Power down

and leave me alone, SpongeBot!

I've still got 15 minutes!

- Oh, sorry, Squidbot!

Sorry, Squidbot! Sorry, Squidbot!

- [grunts] Go away!

[beeping] - I am going to have

to live next to that?

[beeps]

- [sighs] [clanking]

- Knock, knock, knock.

Hey Pat-Tron, I'm going to work!

- I'm going with you, SpongeBot!

I gotta fuel up.

- Hooray! - Hooray!

[voice fades]

[buzzing]

- Pat-Tron is currently in recharge mode.

- [laughs] OK, buddy.

I'll bring you some fuel on my way back home.

[wheels squeaking]

- If you're going to be late, give me the key.

- Ooh, sorry, Squidbot.

But... * The key bone's connected to the finger bone *

[laughs] [beeping]

[clang]

[sign buzzing]

- You're fired! You're fired!

You're fired! You're fired!

You're fired! You're fired!

[clang] [wheezes]

[blubbers]

Thank you, Bot-O.

I got stuck in the firing mode.

- Ahh, to be fired.

- [gasps]

- Nobody's getting fired, you robo-loafer.

Everybody get to work!

Whoa!

[beeps] - Whoop!

The Krabby Batteries are sizzlin'!

Now it's time for condiments.

[clanging]

- Hmm.

[slurps] [electricity zapping]

[yelping]

- Food up, SpongeBot.

Gimme two batteries on a barge and make 'em cry.

[whooshing] [crash]

[electricity zapping]

- Huh? - Ahh!

[blubbering]

- Robo-Gary?

Squidbot?

No!

[dramatic music]

- [gurgling]

- Gary-Squid?

Squid-Gary?

Does not compute. Does not compute.

[Gary yelps] - Get your filthy

robo-snail off my head!

[straining]

- Gary! [panting]

[Squidbot screams]

[clanking] [exclaiming]

- Ay-ya-ya-ya-whoa!

[beeps]

[panting]

- Ahh! Ahh!

[crashing]

I've gotta cut off this pooping parasite!

- All right, what the kelp is going on in here?

[growls]

- [exclaims]

- Come back here, you nickel-plated nincompoops!

[grunts] [powers down]

[cranking]

- Plankbot, you forgot to wind yourself again.

- Thanks, Karen, my flesh and blood wife.

Don't worry, I'll get him.

[growls] - Hi, Karen.

Did Gary come through here?

- He went thataway, Chuckles.

- Th-th-th-thank you!

- Mama told me not to marry a robot.

- Ahh! Gangway!

Runaway robot!

[crashing]

Ahh! - Excuse me, pardon me,

Excuse me, pardon me. - Ow!

Excuse me, pardon me.

[all grumbling]

[shouting]

- Ahh!

- Who disturbs the sacred dome of Sandroid?

I'll hogtie your actuators!

- Sandroid, wait!

Gary is too young to have his actuators hogtied!

- I'll hack your hard drives, you cybernetic simpletons!

[all clamoring] Ow!

- All right, there you go.

- [growling]

[upbeat music]

- [slurping]

[dings]

[whirring]

- Robo-dog!

Get your robo-dog!

- [grunts]

[electricity zapping]

[brakes screech]

- Lube Lagoon?

What happened to Goo Lagoon?

Where in space and time am I?

Looks like I took a wrong turn at the last apocalypse.

- Danger! Danger! - Ah!

Rogue Robot! - Gary, wait!

Come back! [all shouting]

- Who dares defy Sandroid?

- I'm gonna destroy all of you!

- [exclaims]

These junk heaps want my flab for fuel!

[tires screech]

- Ahh!

[mob shouting] - No, Gary!

Not the lagoon!

What do I do now?

Got to think.

[beeping]

That's it! A brick wall!

[beeps]

[rocket whistling] Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!

[crashing]

[panting]

[blows whistle] Gary!

Stop!

- [meowing frantically]

[tires screeching]

- Gary, stop! [horn blares]

Gary, stop! [buzzer blares]

Gary, stop! [bell dings]

He's not gonna stop.

- Ahh!

[mob shouting]

- Ahh!

[gasps] Whoo-hoo!

[meowing]

- Play nice with the flutterbot!

[all moaning]

[ominous music]

[all gasping]

- Ahh!

[electricity crackling]

* *

- Meow?

- [exclaiming]

- [growling]

[roars]

- Amazing!

[whirring]

[shutter clicks]

- Flash photography is forbidden

in the presence of Sandroid!

You will all be assimilated!

So we can all be as close as peas in a pod!

Yee-haw!

- Oh man--

[exclaims]

- Well, this is another fine metallic monstrosity

you've got me into.

- Look at it this way, Squidbot.

Now we'll have a chance to catch up

with all our neighbors.

Hi, Rube. - Well, hello!

- Typical. [buzzes]

Typical. [buzzes]

Typical. [buzzes, babbles]

- Ahh-- [clang]

[beeping]

[upbeat fiddle music]

- Rise of the robots!

Yee-haw!

- I second that! [roars]

[spooky music]

- Robots can never replace us, you say?

Well, anything can happen in a cartoon,

especially if that cartoon is from "The Tidal Zone."

[buzzes] "The Tidal Zone."

[buzzes] "The Tidal Zone."

"The Tidal Zone."

[buzzes] "The Tidal Zone."

[jaunty music]

- * Lightning berries, lightning berries *

* I'm scanning for lightning berries *

* For dear, old, Mr. Plankton *

* *

[angelic choir]

Bingo!

[vacuum whirrs] Huh?

- [chomps and gulps]

Mmm. [stomach growls]

Mm. Mm.

Huh? [screams]

[laughs]

- [groans] Camper Patrick!

- [laughs]

- I can't believe you ate all the lightning berries.

- Huh? Who said that?

Oh, is that my hat?

- No. Wait, just a sec--whoa.

[electricity buzzes]

- [French accent] Lightning berries

and Karen's computer circuitry.

A potent combination

which results in a shocking mind switch.

A common occurrence here in...

"The Tidal Zone."

- [screams]

[groans]

- [Patrick's laugh]

Whee! [laughs]

Whee!

- Hmm? [grunting]

- And then Sandy said "yeah" and Harvey goes "yeah."

And then Kevin said "yeah." [laughs]

Everybody was saying yeah.

- Enough! Why are you talking to me?

- I'm making memories.

- Well, remember this. - Whoa!

- [inhales] Karen!

Ooh, there she is!

Where the heck have you been?

And where are those lightning berries I asked you for?

- [Patrick's voice] I ate them.

- What are you talking about?

You know you don't eat.

Now take me home.

- Uh...

- Oh, hey, buddy.

Come on. We're late. - Whoa!

- Ooh. Whoa, golly. [crashing]

Oh, sweet ride.

You really know how to live.

[both screaming]

- [screams] - [groans]

- Howdy, boys. You're just in time.

I'm almost done setting up the game.

- Whoa, whoa!

[Karen's voice] Whoa, what the heck?

My mind must've switched with Patrick's mind

from the lightning berries.

Flesh and blood and guts.

[gasps] I've gone analog.

Whoa! [groans]

So these are legs?

Whoa, whoa.

A living body isn't so hard to control.

- Huh? - I think I got this.

[vocalizes]

- All ready to play.

- This here's the toughest board game I ever invented.

In order to win, you need to know math,

science, literature, and history.

[foghorn blares]

What's the square root of 25,553,025?

[whirring] - 5,055.

- Huh? - What?

- Uh, the increase in speed of a liquid...

- The law of fluid dynamics.

Post-structuralism.

395 AD.

The sinking of Atlantis.

[energetic classical music]

I win!

both: Huh?

[bubbling]

- That's great, Karen. Real great.

Now, I'll have to substitute radioactive apples...

[groans] For the lightning berries.

- [laughing]

Oof!

[Patrick's voice] Huh? Is that me?

I'm a rollie shoe now?

Cool!

Leedle, leedle, leedle, leedle, leedle.

- [groans]

- Leedle, le--

[Karen's voice] Ooh, ramp.

Ooh-hoo-hoo! [laughs]

- Oh, my Neptune! - [laughing]

[grunts] - Watch it!

[sizzling] [screams]

Stop fooling around and help me cut this open.

Hand me a scalpel.

- Huh? Huh. [groans]

Let me...

[laughing] I got it!

- Now, hand it to me.

[screams]

Ow, ow, ow, ow!

Careful! That's full of sulfuric...acid.

[screams]

All right, time for a robot reboot.

[drill whirring]

Get back here!

[groans]

[whirring]

[groans]

[bubbling]

- [grunting]

- What's gotten into you, Patrick?

- You don't seem like yourself today.

- Well, I'm not myself.

I'm Karen, Plankton's computer assistant in Patrick's body.

[both scream] - Our minds got switched

when we were both electrified by lightning berries.

- Hot diggity dog! A mind switch!

- [gasps]

- Let's analyze. What's it like?

- Well, being in Patrick's body

has opened up senses that I never had like taste.

- Here, try a doughnut.

[beeping]

[explosion] - Ah!

That's delicious!

Hey, what's this taste like?

[vacuum whirring]

That tastes pretty good too.

[burps]

- Wow.

- Are there more things to ingest out here?

[groans]

[screaming]

[groans]

What's happening to me?

- That's called pain.

- Ooh. Whoa. [heartbeat thumping]

Pain. Fascinating.

Ooh. Come on.

Kick me for more pain.

both: Hmm.

- [grunts] - Ow, ow, ow.

[laughter]

[bubbling]

- Whoo-hoo! - [groans]

Get back here! [groans]

- Make way for the rollie shoe!

[laughing]

- Nothing to see here! Go back to your childhoods!

[drill whirring]

[toilet flushes] - You okay in there, Karen?

- [gasps and groans]

Sense of smell, not so great.

Phew, well, it's been interesting,

but all in all,

I'll be happy to be back in my old computer self.

- Ooh, I rigged up this device

that I think will switch you and Patrick's minds back.

I call it the crisscross contraption.

[all groan] - That's my body!

We have to swap our minds back!

- What are you talking about? I'm a rollie shoe.

Rollie shoe forever!

[horse whinnies]

- Not a chance.

I'm rollie shoe!

all: Whoa!

[all screaming]

- [screams] - Huh?

[quirky energetic music]

[all screaming]

[tires squeal]

- [grumbling]

all: Whoa!

- [laughing]

- Hey, over there!

* *

- [grunts]

- [laughs] - Hmm.

- [laughs] - Ooh!

Hmm? - Whoa!

[laughs]

* *

all: Huh?

[all scream]

- [panting] [all groaning]

- [laughs]

You can't catch the rollie shoe!

[blows raspberry] - Okay, Patrick.

I was saving this for my last meal with tastebuds,

but you win.

So here you go.

- Ice cream!

[grunting]

I can't taste it!

I have no mouth and I must ice cream!

This is a nightmare!

[crying]

I don't want to be a rollie shoe anymore!

- Hmm. [grunts]

[eerie music]

Here goes nothing.

[both scream]

all: Whoa.

[both screaming and groaning]

[dramatic music]

[suspenseful music]

- Karen, is that you?

- Duh! - [groans]

It didn't work!

You're still that pink pinhead.

- [Karen's voice] Gotcha! - [groans]

Why did I give you a sense of humor?

Whoa. - Come on.

Let's go home. - Whee!

- All's well that ends well. Right, Patrick?

- Ice cream! Gimme, gimme, gimme!

[screams]

- That's peculiar.

- [screaming]

[kettle hissing]

[both scream]

[whirring]

[tense music]

[dramatic music]

- Leedle, leedle, leedle, lee.

Hey, I'm me again.

Guys?

- Leedle, leedle, leedle, lee.

all: Leedle, leedle, leedle, leedle, leedle, leedle.

- [groans]

all: Leedle, leedle, leedle, leedle, leedle, leedle.

- Hey, new Patricks! Wait for me!

all: Leedle, leedle, leedle, leedle, leedle, lee!

- [French accent] Ah, summer camp,

where each child is unique in their own individual way.

[laughter]

Except for this one time

in Kamp Koral and this one place.

- Hey, what is this? "The Tidal Zone"?

[jaunty music]

* *

[spooky music]

- Bonjour, art lovers.

Tonight, for your viewing enjoyment,

we present a portrait painted in shades of greed.

- Ahh! Another day,

another whole bunch of dollars!

[laughs]

[metallic clinking] Hmm?

Ooh, a quarter!

Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme.

Whew, come back here, you!

Hey, hey, where are you going?

[panting]

[exhales] Whew.

[sighs]

Eh?

Yah! [blubbering]

[ding]

[struggling efforts]

Huh?

Ooh, this quarter is really making me work.

[clinks]

Huh? Hey, get back here!

Ugh!

[grunting]

- Greetings, stranger. - Ahh!

Welcome to my Emporium of Wonders.

Can I interest you in a traditional

Klopnodian Spladunker?

Or perhaps a lightly used Flooner?

- No thanks, old timer.

I just want me quarter.

It seems to have hopped into your pay phone here.

- Oh, I see.

Well I have no power to retrieve your coin,

but I can let you have the payphone

for the low, low price of...

free.

- Free? I'll take it!

- But be warned, that payphone comes with a curse.

[thunder booms] [woman screams]

- Really? How much does the curse cost?

- What? No, the curse is free.

It comes with the phone.

- Well then!

I'll take the curse, too!

[chuckling] - Heed my Kapritzka!

Beware the call of the porch!

Beware!

Ah, forget it.

- [grunting]

Listen up, happy Krustomers!

For the low price of a quarter, now you, too,

can make that important call

while you're eating a Krabby Patty!

[ringing]

Ahoy, there. Krusty Krab.

Eugene Krabs, proprietor, speaking.

- [evil laughter]

Give away your Krabby Patties!

Give them all away!

- [gasps] What kind of obscene phone call is this?

When I find out who you are, I'm gonna--

Oh!

Hey!

[line trilling]

Must give patties away.

[cash register dings]

[all exclaim] No money.

Patties free!

- Free patties?

Oh, Mr. Krabs!

You finally found your inner generosity.

Hooray!

Krabby Patties for everyone!

Wha! Yow!

The Krab is picking up the tab!

[all hooting and hollering]

- All free.

[all cheering]

[all munching]

- [evil laughter]

- [blubbering]

Huh? What just happened?

Oh, boy! A quarter!

I knew this thing would pay off!

- Patties here! - [yelps]

- Free patties!

Get your patties while they're hot!

Get 'em while they're free!

- Free? [woman screams]

[grunts]

SpongeBob! There's no free lunches at the Krusty Krab!

[all clamoring] Have you gone insane?

Get back in the kitchen and stitch

these patty halves back together

so we can sell 'em again.

[sign poofs]

- [groans] It was too good to last.

[ringing]

- Krusty Krab, Eugene-- [groans]

- [evil laughter] Now give away your money!

Every last cent!

- Must give away money.

[panting]

[whistle blares]

[all cheering]

- Give away all money, Boy-O!

- But you just said that--

Oh, I knew you were only kidding, Mr. Krabs!

You really are generous! [chuckles]

- [muttering]

[chuckles] Another quarter!

I love this phone! [cash register dings]

[all clamoring] - Whoo! [laughing]

Whee! [all cheering]

- SpongeBob!

What are you doing with me money?

- Well, I thought you told me to, Mr. Krabs.

I--oh, I don't understand.

[phone ringing]

- Uh! Ooh! - And now, Krabs,

give away the Krusty Krab!

[evil laughter]

- [grunting]

Yes! With this laser cannon,

I can finally blast Krabs!

Huh?

Homina-wha?

- Here his deed to Krusty Krab.

She's all yours.

- Something doesn't seem right here.

But like Granny Plankton always says,

never look a gift snail under the shell!

I win! [laughs]

I'm the greatest!

Huh? [clank]

Uh-oh.

[hypnotic music]

- Ooh! [laughs]

Huh?

Ohh, what the-- where's me quarter?

- [evil laughter] - [grunting]

- Perhaps generosity is its own reward?

- Never! - [laughs]

- [grunts, laughs]

Huh? Ooh.

- Uh--

[both growling]

- Huh?

[gasps]

- [laughing]

- Hey, what's the big idea?

And where is that quarter you owe--

- I'm free! Ha-ha!

[muttering] Um--

Hey kid, lend me a quarter for the bus?

- Sure thing, Mr. Demon!

- I'm finally free!

[laughs]

[phone ringing]

- Well, this ain't so bad.

Steady work, and plenty of quarters!

[laughs] A crab could get used to this!

[crashing] Whoa!

Hey! What's going on? [thud]

- [grunting] [clanging]

- Hey, Squidward,

get that hunk of junk out of here, would you?

Come on.

- Gladly.

[crashing]

- Hello, anyone wanna make a call?

Only costs a quarter.

Ooh, barnacles!

[foghorn blares] [bell dinging]

- Sometimes a free phone

comes at a very high price,

and sometimes the cheapskates

are the ones who get stuck with the bill

here in "The Tidal Zone."

[phone ringing]

Hello?

[grunts]

Must give away one more story.

The story of a grandpa adrift in space and time.

The story of a sea star who is lost in "The Tidal Zone."

[dial tone blaring]

- [yelling]

- Outta my way, you psychedelic space junk!

Sweet Neptune!

Have I found the beginning of the universe?

- * Ohh... *

- Ooh!

[screams]

- * Who lives a pineapple under the sea? *

all: Grandpat Sea Star!

- * Absorbent and yellow and porous is he *

all: Grandpat Sea Star!

- * If nautical nonsense be something you wish *

all: Grandpat Sea Star!

- * Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish *

all: Grandpat Sea Star! - Ready?

all: Grandpat Sea Star! Grandpat Sea Star!

Grandpat Sea Star!

Grandpat

Sea Star! - Oh! Ow!

[laughter]

[dentures clicking rhythmically]

Ow!

I gotta get out of this nightmare!

[gasps] Ohh!

[shimmering tone]

[tires screech]

[intense Western music]

* *

- [spits]

* *

- [spits]

- [spits]

- This town ain't big enough for the both of us.

[electricity crackles]

- [screaming]

- [gasps]

- Whoa! - Ahh!

Ohh!

[electricity crackles]

- [munching]

- Um--this town ain't big enough for the both of us.

[gong splash]

[both yelling]

- Now that's a good looking baby!

- [neighs]

- Well, this is my stop.

See y'all later!

Hyep! Giddy-up, now!

- [neighs] - Yahoo!

- Happy trails!

[electricity zapping] Ahh!

Ohh!

[crashing]

[groaning]

Uh! Yah!

[playing Polka music]

[groans]

- Bonjour.

- [sighs]

It's good to be back home where it's normal.

- Hi, Grandpat-- - Huh?

- What you watching?

- [screams]

Ehh, close enough.

- And so we leave things a little bit weird,

but that's how we like it here in "The Tidal Zone."

Au revoir.

[static buzzing] - Hey, I was watching that!