Original subtitles

I once dreamed that I was going with my friends

to beat up a guy that had done something.

I was furious and thought he deserved it.

But then I sensed how scared he'd be and wanted to back out.

I looked at my friends and knew they would turn against me.

They would need to get their anger out someway.

I kept on going but then a huge eagle came down

and grabbed me.

He carried me across the city, out to the open sea, and dropped me there.

I tried to swim but instead I sank

and started drowning.

When someone lifted me up out of the sea,

and a giant woman made of endless colors appeared.

She held me in the palms of her hands,

smiled and wanted to show me all the colors of the world.

BEAUTIFUL BEINGS

That is number one:

Who is the main character of the story?

Sit down, Baldur.

Number one:

Who is the main character of the story and what do you know about him?

When did you get information about the main character's situation?

What did the descriptions...

Hey! Stop that.

What? He really stinks.

Describe the boy's communication...

Balli!

Dude.

Show us how you scream. Scream for us or I'll hurt you.

- Hit him harder. - Scream.

Scream, you idiot. Scream!

- Scream! - Go on, just do it.

Are you retarded? I'll fuck you up.

Poor thing. So weird!

It's beyond hilarious.

Yes, I know.

Of course not. I... I love you.

I do too.

No, I know.

I'm sorry.

Hey, what's up?

Come over here a second. It's nice to see you.

If my stepdad found out what you did, he'd kill you all.

Put the jacket on.

Dude, put the jacket on or I'll beat you up.

Dude. What the fuck are you doing? Are you retarded?

Police report show that violence among young people in Iceland

is a rising issue especially in the capital area.

Do we really know what's going on in our children's lives?

Today, a 14 year old boy was on his way home from school

when a group of young boys attacked him with a burned tree.

Baldur Thorsteinsson was left lying in his own blood

with a broken nose and a concussion.

Spotlight continues its coverage on this hidden issue.

I can't believe this is happening here.

I hope he's going to be alright.

He's just some total nerd.

What's wrong with you? How can you say that?

Just look at him!

Who else would be beaten up like that and then show himself on TV?

I don't care if you...

like me or not, I just want to be left alone.

Most of you made between four and eight errors.

And then there's Arnar, with a total of 43 errors.

- What are you doing, man? - I won't be needing it anymore.

- You have to return it. - I'll just say I lost it.

Well, your mom will have to pay for it.

Fuck.

- Fuck. - You're so stupid.

Shut up.

- Hey, give me your book for a second. - No way.

Come on, just give it to me.

Addi, some dude is threatening to beat me up.

- Who? - Jónas from eastside.

Why?

I swapped spit with his girlfriend long ago. Guess he just found out.

- Dude, what were you thinking? - What? He's a pedophile.

He's like 17 and she is 13. He's got a full-on beard and everything.

And you got with her anyway?

She's only a year younger than us.

You'll back me up if he comes and makes trouble.

No bullshit.

Hey, give me a cig.

Hey, check out this guy.

Siggi, you should get one of those. You're so goddamn ugly.

Shut up.

What are you doing?

Aren't you the guy from TV who got attacked?

Are you trying to cut yourself?

Are you stupid or what?

Exactly, stupid.

Got a cig?

What's in it?

- Ew, what the hell. - It works.

Disgusting.

Drink up.

Go on, finish it.

Wow, dude!

Well done!

Shit, what have you done, man?

- Come on, we'll get you home. - Please don't.

Just leave him, he'll puke all over us.

Are you okay?

It's a bum house.

I see why he wants to kill himself.

I decide who is welcome.

And you're not welcome.

This is my home and only those who I invite,

they are welcome. Nothing else.

What are you doing?

What? Nothing.

- Were you talking to that thing? - No.

- Give it. - Please. Addi.

- Shit, you're crazy. - Addi!

Addi.

Your idiot father took this without asking me...

Leave me alone!

Jónas and some guys are looking for me.

Imagine what they'll say about us if we don't dare to do anything?

Fuck with me or my friends again and I'll kill you!

Yeah! Yeah!

I said, get up!

- Are you fucking retarded or what? - I told you a hundred times, get up!

I'm not putting up with it.

Out every night and then sleeping through the whole day.

Leave me alone.

So get up then.

Arnar!

Leave me the fuck alone!

Abba, go!

Hi.

Hi.

Sorry, I don't have any cigarettes now.

Abba, stop it. Go away, stupid dog.

It's fine. She's just happy to see me.

- Want a butt? - Butt?

Yeah. I've got some good ones.

Mom sometimes forgets she's smoking a cigarette and lights a new one.

Why are all the doors broken?

My stepdad gets real crazy sometimes, and then...

He's not coming home soon or?

No. He's in jail.

For what?

For beating up some guys and some other stuff.

What other stuff?

Don't know. I don't think he did it.

- Where's your mom? - She's with some girlfriends.

She won't be home until tomorrow or the day after, at the earliest.

So you're home alone?

It's not that bad.

Who cooks for you then?

She buys food before she leaves, but I'm almost out now.

I just hope she gets her ass back home soon.

Last night, I dreamed that I was moving into a huge house,

almost like a castle. It means I'll be rich soon.

You have to remind me to play the lottery.

Why don't you just dream the numbers?

- I believe you. - Come here, you little monster.

Here.

- So fucking ugly. - Jeez.

Konni, check it out.

Don't fuck with me. Get up.

Why's it so fucking dirty in here?

Does your mom never clean up?

Ew, what's that?

It's poop.

- No. - Yes, it is!

No, it's puke from my dog, Abba.

- How long has it been there? - I don't know.

You don't know? Why don't you clean it up?

Why should I clean it up?

What's wrong with you? What's wrong with your mom?

Hey, leave it, Siggi.

Okay, let's go.

No, dude, let's chill for a bit.

It's not like someone knows we're here.

Come here.

Why's your eye so weird?

Shit!

No way, man!

- I lost it when I was four. - How?

BB gun.

My stepdad shot me, right in the eye. He didn't know it was loaded.

He probably just didn't want such an ugly kid.

- Where's your dad? - He's dead.

How did he die?

He drowned.

He took LSD and thought he was Jesus or something.

Thought he could walk on water.

What?!

Just some things I grabbed from home.

- Okay, let's go now. - Relax, man.

No, it's disgusting here and I don't want to get lice. Let's go.

You coming, or what?

Come on.

Come on, I'm inviting you. Let's go.

Hey...

It's no big deal. Just take one step at a time

and don't look down.

Dude, don't.

- Go on. Do it. - Shut up, pig face.

Aw, dude.

Look at that poor thing.

Hey! Want some?

Why are you dragging that freak along with us? He's a filthy inbred.

Inbred. It's true, he's an inbred.

Konni is sort of the leader of the group.

By far craziest.

The kids in the neighborhood call him The Animal

because he likes fighting and beating up guys.

He can be extremely dangerous because he doesn't think before he acts.

Girls like him, though.

And he's probably slept with most of the cute ones at school.

But what nobody knows except me,

is that Konni is scared shitless of his dad.

Sometimes he doesn't dare to go home until his old man's fallen asleep.

Look at that gimp.

You're not bringing him with us again.

I don't want everyone to think we're his friends.

If Balli hangs out with us,

maybe Konni will stop beating you all the time.

Shut up!

Siggi is the weirdo.

His mom has some kind of disease and she's always wearing a silk robe.

His stepdad's a wheeler-dealer

who's always trying to find a reason to give Siggi a hard time

and make him feel unwelcome.

But what his stepdad doesn't know is that Siggi gets revenge

by jerking off the dog and freezing its jizz in the ice cubes.

Of course, he would never admit this to anyone, but he knows that I know.

BE BACK LATE TONIGHT YOUR SISTER IS AT YLFA'S

I'm the most normal of us all.

But what nobody knows about me

is that I went to an Anada Marga play school

and that my parents believe in supernatural stuff

like aliens and magic.

Then my parents divorced and Dad started drinking.

And he hasn't really been in touch that much since.

Konni. Konni.

What are you doing up there? Get the fuck down.

It's okay. Balli's cleaning the house.

- Come inside, man. - No way, get down.

Come on.

Get the fuck down.

Don't forget that.

And this one too.

Hey, Balli...

What are you doing, man?

Dude. Do it to Siggi.

Stop it. Do it to Siggi.

No, do it to Balli.

- What are you laughing at? Gimp! - Dude... Be nice to Balli.

Keep cleaning, faggot!

Sorry.

Guys, come over here.

Come here.

See that boy over there.

- He fucked a sheep. - No way.

I swear I'm not lying. He's retarded or something. He lives on my street.

His dad works as a mailman even though they have loads of money.

Super weird, too.

Konradur, is your father home?

I once sold him some tea and told him it was pot.

- What's his name? - His name? Danni Braindead.

Asshole.

He can't come in here.

Relax, we're just fucking with him a little.

- Dude, not so much. - It's fine.

- I don't want him to come in. - Shut up, Balli, or we'll throw you out.

Fuck, man. Have some.

Go on. Try it.

This is sugar.

No. Have you never done cocaine? That's what it tastes like.

- Fuck. I'm feeling the buzz. - Me too. Shit.

- See. - Told you so.

Is it true that you fucked a sheep?

No.

It's okay if you've done it. Balli's done it loads of times.

I have never done it.

Why are you lying to us? We're your friends, aren't we?

- Come on, tell us. How did you do it? - Tell us how you did it.

I just grabbed it...

Yeah...

I knew it.

You're so cool man.

Have some more.

- Have you done something else? - Something funny.

- Yeah, something funny. - You must've done something, Danni.

One time I tried to fuck a chicken, but it didn't work.

It was just like...

No, now you're lying. Why are you lying to us?

- I want to go. - Relax. We're not judging you.

We've done all kinds of stuff, funny shit.

What else have you done? Have you done some more funny things?

I made him suck my dick one time.

No, he is lying.

- No. It's true. - No, it isn't true.

- Yes, it is. - No. He's lying.

It's true. In school, I made him do it, more than once.

- At school? Ew. - No... No it isn't true.

How'd you make him do it?

In the toilet. I'm much stronger than him.

- No. - Yes I am.

- It's not true. - It is true.

Get the fuck out!

- Go away. - Why?

Konni, take it easy.

Go away!

Konni! Relax, man.

Danni, run!

He deserved it.

My dad's gonna kill me.

That creep lives on my street.

Then just tell him what he told us.

Your dad's just gonna be glad you beat him up.

What are you doing?

You know Balli did it.

We don't know that. Maybe that freak was just talking shit.

No.

Siggi, if it did happen then we're not gonna talk about it. Okay?

Boys, what are you doing in there?

- What are you doing, man? - Move.

Help me out!

- What were you thinking, man? - Look at this.

- Konni. - Balli gave me permission to do it.

Balli, are you stupid or something?

Balli?

Shit.

What's going on here?

What is going on?

Who are you?

- What are you doing here? - They're my friends.

Balli, come and talk to me.

Fucking assholes.

I had an interesting dream last night. About you.

- What? - It's...

When I woke up this morning, I felt like I had to urge you

to open up to your subconscious.

- You and your sister are just like me... - Mom, I'm sorry,

but I don't believe in that stuff.

- It's true whether you believe it or not. - Okay, Mom.

Thanks, Mom. I'll keep that in mind, Mom.

Put away your plate.

I spoke to your father yesterday.

- He really wants to see you. - I don't care.

- He wants to see you. - He can come round here, then.

No, that's not going to work.

I'm not going to wait somewhere, and then he doesn't show up.

Okay, he can come and pick you up, but I'm not inviting him in.

And if I'm at work,

then you're not allowed to invite him in either.

And if he does come in,

make sure he doesn't take anything, especially not my books.

- No matter what he says. - Okay, relax.

- These are my books. I bought them. - He won't show up anyway.

He loves you. You know that.

Yeah, yeah.

Idiot.

- Goddamn, you're ugly. - Shut the fuck up, man.

He's definitely home, he just doesn't want to answer.

Balli, we know you're in there!

Hi. I've also been knocking. It seems like no one's home.

Are you friends with Baldur?

My name is Unnur, and I'm trying to reach his mother.

Have you seen her recently?

Hi, Baldur. So you were home after all.

Is your mother perhaps home too?

Can I come in and have a quick word with you?

No, not now.

Where's your mother?

Please ask her to call me when she gets back.

Who was she?

Just some old hag from social services.

Does she come round often?

Yeah, sometimes.

- Balli's into this kind of stuff. - Shut up, fag.

You're the one who put it on.

Your mom's fucking weird, Balli.

Balli, I'm leaving, but I'll be back later today.

Don't break anything else in here, boys.

Okay, Mom, just go!

Hey, Addi...

Do we wanna meet Anna and her girlfriends tonight?

Sure.

I wanna come with.

What about Balli?

- Stop it! - You'll only wet your hair.

No!

Konni, we'll let you handle this one.

Hey, put this on.

Balli is going to lose his virginity tonight.

Hurry up!

- Chill out! - Come on, Addi!

Let's do this?

Forget it, not a chance.

What, are you trying to see my boobs or?

You were in my way.

I've heard lots of stories about The Animal. I thought he'd be different.

He's alright.

Oh, no.

Ask if we can come or if they can spare some beers.

Like a cheap whore.

Hi. I was wondering if me and my girlfriends could get some beers?

Yeah, sure.

What is wrong with you?

That fucking retard spat on me.

Konni! Where are you going? Get back here, man.

Get the fuck out!

Konni! Konni!

Hey, easy, easy.

I'm just trying to get him out of here.

Go away! Stop it!

Konni! Leave him alone! Get off him!

Konni!

What the hell are you doing?

What's going on here, boys?

- Get out before I call the cops. - Shut the fuck up!

Come on! Addi!

Addi, now!

You're fucking crazy.

What happened? What were you thinking?

I don't know. Oh shit, I think I knocked some old guy out.

Wow, you guys are nuts!

I heard screaming all the way to the street.

Siggi and Balli were both scared shitless.

Obviously. So were you. We all thought you were gonna get battered.

I almost called an ambulance.

You could have done for the guy that spat on you.

It's not fucking funny.

- I'm outta here. - No, Addi. Don't go.

Relax. Don't be a downer.

What, you gonna attack me now?

Take it easy, guys. You're friends, remember?

Right. We're friends.

What?

Mom...

did you come to me in a dream last night?

What? What were you doing?

- Nothing. - What was he doing?

Nothing.

Mom comes to my dreams lots of times

to make sure I don't go to places I'm not supposed to.

- Yeah, right. - It's true.

Your sister's always wandering to places she's not supposed to, so I go get her.

Places with lots of creepy demons.

- It's true. - It's absolutely true.

Do you think I'm an idiot? I don't believe in that bullshit.

Just leave me alone and mind your own business.

Here.

The girls told me some guys are now looking for us.

How do you feel about Balli scoring last night and not you?

That wasn't cool last night.

I would understand if that dude spat on you or me.

But running into a party for Anna, without talking to me?

What if those guys knew how to fight? We'd been fucking thrashed.

It all worked out.

I just... I can't deal with the fights anymore.

I don't wanna end up seriously harming anyone, even if they're an asshole.

Sorry. Friends?

I mean it. Okay?

And now kiss.

Wake up.

You fainted.

- Have some. - No.

Siggi! Siggi!

I knew it, you idiots. It doesn't work.

What's going on?

- Hi. - Hi.

- Wow, it's so clean. - You're not gonna trash it up again.

Calm down.

- What are you doing here? - I'm allowed to be here.

Did he kick you out?

No. We're just taking a break.

Balli, don't be so mean to your sister.

So you're Balli's friends?

Balli can have friends. He's not completely retarded.

- Shut up. - Wow, Balli just started talking back.

What were you doing when I came in?

Siggi was trying to make drugs from kiwis and bananas.

I see.

Well, I'd be careful with that mix. It can be very dangerous.

How?

I know about people who've gotten real sick from it.

Sick how?

They just go crazy for fruit. Especially bananas.

Siggi once tried to make drugs from painkillers.

- No. - It's true.

He's lying.

Hey, guys. Do you see that?

What?

What?

Nothing... Nothing.

Where did you get that?

- Did you steal them from my sister? - You want her to eat mushrooms?

Of course not. Maybe she was keeping it for someone else.

Your sister's a junkie, Balli. Deal with it.

- No, man, let's drop it. - Why?

I've just got a bad feeling about this.

Bad feeling? I knew it. Addi is going insane.

Hey, hey, Addi, you can rest assured

that Konni won't be beating up anyone while he's on mushrooms.

Come on. Do it with us.

Jónas has been threatening us.

I wouldn't mind beating up that fool again.

But, for you, I'll leave it be.

So, you guys wanna join Konni and beat him up?

No? Then shut the fuck up!

Here. Is everything okay?

Don't know.

I just don't feel too good.

Doesn't feel too good.

Shut up, idiot. There's nothing wrong with saying that.

What's wrong?

I've just got a bad feeling in here.

- Like something bad's about to happen. - I knew it.

Addi is going crazy in the head.

- Shut up. - What? I'm allowed to joke about it.

- Fuck. - Run!

Which one of you is Konni?

Are you seriously gonna leave your fucking friend on his own?

- Fucking come down here right now. - Get over here!

- Fucking rat. I'm gonna kill him. - His face is turning blue.

Hey, hey. Easy, easy.

Hey!

- My car! - Fucking Konni!

Can you get up?

Konni!

Get the fuck out of my car! Get the fuck out, now!

Hey!

They know who those older guys are that Jónas had with him.

They're gonna help me make a deal with them.

What do you want us to do?

Just wait here and be ready for it, in case I need help.

Dude, what are you doing? Put it back.

It's Svenni's.

Leave it. We know it's there.

Don't tell Konni or anyone else about it.

Okay?

Do you think they might show up here?

Let's hope not.

How did you know they were coming earlier?

I don't know. Just, here.

Are you psychic?

Hey!

Were the fuck are you!? I'm gonna fucking kill you!

Are you fucking retarded?

Hey, sorry. He told me to do that.

I'm Simon.

Where's Siggi?

I promised to give him something.

Something Siggi's got.

Hey, guys.

Have some.

- Have you taken these before? - Yeah.

Then you know not to take too many to begin with.

Just enough to get a little buzz.

Here.

Look at those guys. I don't trust them.

They're gonna sell us, pimp us out.

Balli is on their side!

Are you okay? Feeling alright?

Hey, can you open up? I forgot my jacket in there.

Hey, what are you doing in there? Open up!

Hello?

Shut your face and piss off or I'll end you.

Get the fuck away from him or I'll kill you!

Hey, take it easy, man.

Let's just forget about this. It's best for you and your friend too.

Nothing happened.

They were just messing with me.

I was totally out of it... wasted.

I'll help you get back at them.

Nothing happened. Nothing happened, okay?

If you say something else to anyone, I'll fucking kill you.

Okay.

Pick that up.

Come here.

Would you look at that.

Come here.

It's good to be home.

What are you reading?

Donald Duck?

Hey, there. Up already?

Your mom told me you never got out of bed yesterday.

What are you doing here?

Come sit with us.

- Shouldn't you guys just get going? - Where to?

- Your dad wants to take you swimming. - I want to go with.

Elisa, we've talked about this.

Well, don't you wanna give me some coffee?

Okay, I'll make one cup of coffee, but then you'll get going.

Relax, we don't have to leave now. He just got here.

- And I don't feel like swimming. - We don't have to go swimming.

We can also just... hang out here, chat a bit.

Or grab some food, see a movie, just do whatever you want.

Your mom said you've been acting up towards her.

Punching the wall, talking back and stuff.

I was just tired.

Just tired?

"I am so tired!"

It's no excuse. I'll kick you out if you do it again.

This is how you wanted it.

Hey!

No, of course. Seriously, Addi, this isn't okay.

When I was your age, I would've been smacked around

if I even dared to leave dirty footprints on the floor.

I had to say, "Yes, sir. I'm sorry, sir.

How much homework should I do, sir?"

What's this nonsense?

- Are you still doing karate? - No, he stopped showing up to training.

It's because you're not doing karate anymore.

It makes sense. I'm the same.

I always need to be moving around, having something to do.

Maybe I should join you at karate.

- I've stopped drinking, you know. - For a long time?

Yes, nearly a month now.

I feel much better.

Haukur, you smell of beer.

I've stopped drinking spirits.

Don't you just drink more beer instead?

Sure, but you know...

Not really. I've practically stopped that as well.

- Here you go. - Thanks.

Alright then...

- Don't you want to take the next one? - The next one?

It's almost five o'clock. I'm not sure. I'm supposed to...

Sure, just go.

Okay.

- I'll call you. - Yeah. Okay.

- Okay? - Yeah.

Good afternoon.

How long are you planning on staying?

I don't know. I'll probably leave tomorrow.

Nonsense. You'll stay here for as long as you want.

Finally, the whole family is back together again.

Dig in. Plenty more where that came from.

This is Konni. If you don't know what to do, hang up.

Addi!

What, are you avoiding me?

Where's Konni?

He's just at home. Tired.

That party was insane the other day.

What do you mean?

Just fun. Why? You seem tense.

Stop it, man.

Calm down.

Another party and we weren't invited!

What's going on?

- Svenni's back. - Hey!

Who are you?

- My friends. - Your friends?

Aren't you going to invite them in?

No, they need to get going.

Why doesn't your mom just divorce him?

She can't. He'd kill her.

She's just hoping that he'll go back to jail soon.

Don't say anything about this to Konni.

I'm gonna go.

Why don't you just chill with us for a bit?

I just wanna get home.

Hell yeah, I'm good.

Balli, come here. Come on.

Beer for you, and...

a beer for your sister.

Tell your sister to come and join us.

Leave them alone, they don't wanna hang out with weirdos like us.

Or else we'll come and get her!

Oh, how annoying.

Addi.

You can't interfere with this.

Some things aren't ours to influence.

Hey, Balli.

Dude.

Does he beat up your mom?

Is he doing something he shouldn't, to you or your sister?

Like what?

Has he raped her?

I'm going to kill him.

We have to get him out of there.

We could call the cops.

Don't you think they'd done that long ago if they dared too?

Balli can do it.

What do you think he'll do to Balli?

This is what we'll do: We'll take masks and clubs

and tell him if he doesn't fuck off, we'll smash his head in.

- He'll kill you. - He can't handle all of us.

No way am I doing that.

You're not gonna stand by your friend?

- Balli doesn't want us to do anything. - No?

He just wants that creep to keep on raping his sister and beating up his mom.

Let's get Simon and his friends to do it. They're more likely to scare him.

Relax. Let go of him. Konni, let go of him.

What about you? Are you too good for me?

Too good for Balli?

Are you a pussy now, like Siggi?

I swear, if you're not with us, you'll regret it.

We're doing this.

Balli. When is he home alone?

Abba, come on.

Get the fuck away from here and never come back

or we'll kill you! Understand?

Take it easy. Just take it easy.

We're leaving. Let him go!

I said let go of him!

Addi. What happened?

I'm just taking a bath. Leave me alone.

Good morning. Arnar Hauksson?

He needs to come with us.

Sooner or later your friends are going to tell us what happened.

It's important for us to get your version of the story now.

Otherwise you might end up taking the blame

for something you didn't do.

You don't have a record here with us,

but Konrad Fridriksson has a long record,

and it seems like he went too far this time.

Because the man you attacked...

will most likely not survive.

You do realize the gravity of what has happened?

Don't you?

Listen to me.

You have to tell the police what happened.

You can't be thinking of your friends now.

It's best for everyone, including them, that you tell the truth.

I was the one who hit him.

Don't say anything.

Not a word.

Let me figure this out.

I don't know.

Were they looking for something?

Did your stepfather have anything that they wanted?

Baldur.

We know it hasn't always been easy living with your stepfather.

What happened that made your friends attack him?

Let's go home.

- What did your friend do? - Elisa.

Your brother doesn't want to talk about it.

Did you see it?

What's wrong with you? I said we're not going to talk about it.

Just leave your brother alone.

Balli just said it was self-defense.

He also told the cops what the old man was doing to his mom and sister.

And if he isn't a vegetable, he's going back to prison.

What about Balli?

I'm gonna head home.

Siggi thinks I was the one who hit him.

I'm gonna fuck off too. See ya.

Imagine that a bright light surrounds you

and protects you.

Mom.

Do you know where Balli is?

Please...

I just want to know how he's doing.

Looking good.

Thanks.

How are you?

I'm alright. Just can't wait to go back home.

How's your mom?

She knew it wasn't me. But still didn't say anything.

I haven't seen her since I moved.

She never comes over when she's allowed to.

I just hope she's not drugged up and totally out of it.

I saw her in the neighborhood the other day.

She looked okay.

I'm sorry.

It's okay, you don't have to say sorry to me.

He deserved it.

What's up with Siggi and Konni?

I don't know.

Siggi never leaves the house anymore, spends all his time on his computer.

Konni started hanging out with some guys I don't want to hang out with.

Do you still sense things?

Sometimes.

Can you read my fortune?

No, man. I can't do that.

Just try it.

What?

You will...

turn yourself into a woman.

- Shut up, man. - It's true. I'm being serious.

You and Siggi are gonna be a couple, and have sex all the time.

Siggi will be all fat and bald, in bed, with his dog, calling for you.

- "Ballína!" - Shut up, man. That's gross.

"Do you want to have a threesome?"

- You'd like that, disgusting. - Shut up.

But seriously, I think you're going to be fine.

Thanks for being my friend.