All language subtitles for The Bawdy Adventures of Tom Jones (1976) starring Joan Collins HD 1080p - English

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Original subtitles

for

watch the feathers flying through the

countryside 10 to it's not the fo it's

got to be theones boy wives ands sign to

be by his

side men all checking locks anding up

the doors but once a

girl boy no man alive can keep her

away all the ladies in the county come

to know him one by one he provides the

kind of loving that can keep a woman

young every girl is longing for very

ownes

[Music]

Bo maybe you're a man who likes a simple

life doing by thees or lazing in the

sunshine if You' got a sweetheart or a

pretty

wife don't be over confident she may be

slipping out

cuz once a girl sets her eye on this l

boy no man alive can keep her

away all the ladies in the county come

to know him one by one he provides the

kind of loving that can keep a woman

young every girl is longing for very

ownes

[Music]

boy all the ladies in the county come to

know him one by one he provides the kind

of loving that can keep a woman young

every girl is longing for her very own

Jones

[Music]

[Music]

oh Square Western you D old devil sir

and I thought you was

asleep did you

now hey don't struggle so you never like

about a bad heart and when I go I want

to die in bed not with me you

ain't you're plump as a Christmas goose

and that's without the stuffing many a

true words spoken in Gest sir what do

you mean gal I hardly know how to say it

sir as you know I'm a single girl

God-fearing and blameless yes yes yes go

on I'm with child what tell me who's

pupped you and I'll make him she been

born careful of your heart sir Dam my

heart give me his name I'll make him wed

you come along it was your sir what it

is yours sir oh my heart at Christmas

when you was giv out the presents oh sir

you were right yes but best not to

mention it again what am I to do when

the brat

arrives wrap him in a pudding cloth and

place the bastard Dumpling on the

doorstep then sir then I'll deem that

it's been left by Providence and adopt

it as my own but the child sir what life

is there for a bastard child the best

for I should know oh was you un sir I

might have guessed ENT has he certainly

not Put Another Log on the Fire and

listen to the tale I have to

tell many years ago that old idiot

Squire allworthy was coming home from

London though he'd only been away a

month or more his Faithful Servants

found plent to do around the

house Mr BR

you're I'm coming Mr

BR I'm here Mr BRS

[Applause]

[Laughter]

[Music]

there's no doubt about it you should

spend less time in the kitchens and more

time in the garden when so cuz you can

make things grow quicker than any green

fingers I live come across

The Squire how we miss

him the

Squire he's come home baby quicker we're

done

[Music]

for goodday choir

welcome home Squire worthy sir

ah welcome home Squire how we' missed

you it's good to be home my luggage

follows see to it when it

arrives Eloise there I trust you have

something in the oven Mrs beel it's just

been put in Squire the M's looking fine

Ty I've been busy bedding sir good

man it is good to have you all begin sir

oh thank you very much

babes that was a near Escape I thought I

were for it another couple of minutes

and you would have been

Mr it's good to be back it's not been

the same without you sir

[Music]

come back come back all of you now then

I come home and what do I find in my bed

in your bed sir in my bed sir a baby sir

a damn baby a squawking kicking puking

baby newly hatched and in me bed now

where's Mrs Wilkins why isn't me

housekeeper here she sleeping her get

her to me room

[Music]

Mrs Wilkins Mrs Wilkins what's the

matter a baby Mrs Wilkins but who's is

it sir and wants to be done oh do what

to be have to do to babies wash it feed

it bounce it belch it not me sir but

it's mother abandoned the bastard in my

bed how will you explain it damn it I

don't have to explain it it's me that

requires the

explanation now then explain this

strange event and be sure you tell me

true was it you Who Bore this child I'm

a virgin true and

Tred was it you oh no you never never

lied was it you my faithful Wilkins was

it you who brought me shame at my age

dear Squire I gladly take the blame oh

what am I to think what am I to do if

one of you is not the mother then

who how can I possibly explain it that I

found a baby in my bed if someone

doesn't claim it on Whom Shall I blame

it Eloise Maran Hector Jeremy or friend

I'm innocent I swear it may the Lord

strike be dead when the village gossips

get the tail be quiet why he is already

PO he could very well be ruined for life

I don't have a mistress at loner wife oh

how can I possibly explain it to my

friends who certainly will call oh how

they'll wink I know what they'll think

and here am I quite innocent of anything

at all how say that he has lied I'll be

convicted before I

tried oh how

unfair it's me this situation will

destroy black sheep have you any wool

how strange anyone should want to give

away a bouncing baby boy a boy we looked

a boy a baby

boy a

son I know how I'll explain it when

everything is said and done I'll hold

him in my arms and say to everyone no

explanations needed no explanations

needed no explanations needed for he

my son

hallelujah

hallelujah and I'm his

father well I bet that caused a stir sir

it certainly did old squirel with his

sister Bridget was Abed and indisposed

when she heard the news but as soon as

she was well she was over to the house

and righteous woman though she was she

seemed to take an instant fondness for

the child did he find out whose it was

uh Bridget knew or thought she did Jenny

Jones Jenny Jones The Village T you

could tell by the eyes are you sure who

else that

scheming not in front of young Thomas

because that what have named him but he

knew your heart was as soft as butter of

course it's hers but will she confess it

never I'll take my whip to her I'll make

her talk poor little might I'll help you

bring him up what a good sister you are

to me I'll teach that Jenny Jones a

lesson if the village girls think we've

both gone soft to be laying bastards

like hens lay eggs and all in my

[Applause]

Nest better sitting there Goin why don't

you give me a hand I get a better view

from here I can watch you fill in

buckets all

day you like to see me fill another

would

that damn you Jenny Jones what sort of a

trick was that it cool your AR down

didn't

it I want a word with you Jenny Jones

you listen to me there's been a b

there's been a bastard put in my bed my

bed up the Mana and I'll St my life it's

yours so what if it is mine you baggot

there certainly no one more fitted to be

the mother of the child deserves for

certain she's like a

rabbit come confess it it can't further

harm your

reputation come on come on you sound

like a lot of clacking hands so what if

it is M what then I knew it whippers

fire make her tell the father's name bet

b

but give

her up about your business well you set

this pigeon among the cats then not a

pigeon a CUO who lead in someone else's

Nest now then who's the father I must

know you can tear me limb from limb

Squire I'll never tell but I must admit

you've been bedded by all and Sury in

this town all except one Squire damn it

go put your CL on you'll be having them

accusing me of being the father and all

I'm doing is adopting him why don't you

jump in bed you get closer to him how

dare leave me alone with the gossip May

well be hung for sheep as a lamb silence

Devil's

tongue hey I know what you're all

thinking but it never

happened poor Jenny Jones what happened

to her she married a fellow called

Waters and finished up running the bull

in at Upton on the London Road pour me a

glass

yeah soon after Tom was born B Squire

allworthy sister Bridget married a

captain blifil of the

drons the drink was his undoing which

explains why he proposed to her in the

first

place a year later Bridget gave birth to

a baby

boy soon after the christening young

Captain BFF's liver passed away and took

him with it bridg it was never the same

again in fact she took to her bed and

the bottle to get over

it I don't think she ever got out of bed

from that day on except to get another

bottle she sent her son blifil to stay

with Squire allworthy so he and Tom grew

up

together yes but blifil was the clever

one he was the favorite pupil of Dr tham

and Mr Square

who is they tutors engaged to beat some

learning into the lads and if Tom's

brains had been in his backside he'd

have had a headache for

[Music]

life well so far it don't sound as being

a bastard was much fun oh he had fun all

right but he had to pay the

price we all

do just on 10 and no sign of him I

suppose he'll Fain illness or something

I'll Flay the young hide off

him by the way Mr BL how is your aling

mother the good Mr Bridget sinking I

fear sir have no fear be brave if the

worst comes we'll help you handle her

Affairs oh thank for a percentum of

course where is that

boy one for every minute he's late you

may double that if you wish he's late

for me too

it's all right my father's out hunting

he won't be back for

[Music]

hours Tom if only he'd consent to my

seeing you without us having to hide

like

this it's

late I should be learning

when will I see you he's hunting again

tomorrow can't you get

away I'll try and think of

[Music]

something if only our stations in life

weren't so different if they weren't so

different we wouldn't be so in love

[Music]

I must

[Music]

go Fox it must be coming this way quck

my coat

[Applause]

[Music]

[Applause]

you out I have you hide for

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

[Applause]

this a fox aren't you

T it's you they smell and we've lost the

fox don't hurt him father that's what

you're after you penniless bastard

you'll never take my daughter's hand the

all the stink into the river with him

let's kill the fish dab the

[Music]

fish can't swim

[Music]

oh

Tom farewell Sophia I love you it's all

right they've

[Music]

gone I'll see you tomorrow meet me in

the B but when when they go to hunt the

fox all

right C to go t

n quad Odio

laum said

quad what does it mean

boy I can't think

so can you translate for this turnip

head BFF oh I'm sorry Dr swack I wasn't

paying attention what what was the first

word

again

testigo oh yes I chastise thee not out

of hatred but out of love amen now

please be seated

boy sit

Bo unless you want another beating yes

sir Dr tham Master bfi's work is

immaculate I might even say pristine yes

[Music]

indeed ow

[Applause]

[Music]

[Music]

I I was was just warming the bed like

you told me sir not that way H say get

in D get

in I spend my life fighting temptation

for it wasn't so strong no sir don't sir

please sir stop yapping woman where is

it where what where is it what sir the

fastner you

fool get out

[Music]

[Applause]

it's a blasted Fox after a

hand where's my gun it's that

fox never mind the foxes there plenty

more

[Music]

I'm on the track of something good just

let them wait and see I've got the scent

of laughter for I'm not the

dunce they think me to

be I'll lay a trail I'll have them foxed

so they'll stop hounding me you'll never

find in learning books those bright

ideas I get

frequently they have been born on the

wrong side of the sheep but they'll

never make a wet blanket of me I'm not

inclined to be scholarly but what I've

got is

ingenuity but what I

got is ingenuity

I

[Music]

Exemplar timekeeping Master Jones good

day s good day

Cousin look got a salt SP you should eat

more

fruit good for the

skin never mind all that clear up when

he mared sop

an excellent match

Beauty

virtue yes well that's mrir all right

what has Master BFFL to offer being born

the right side of the blanket is a

certain

Advantage very

[Music]

good how many times must I remind you

boy violence begets

violence dry your eyes on this

part no no no I said your eyes are you

ready boy do your worst on the contrary

I shall do my best tight trousers

boy hounds Gentlemen please we'll get

that damn Fox today imagine last night

when I was in the middle of me prayers

and I was asking the dear Lord to guide

my hand and stiffen me purpose that

Bloody Fox woke out the whole house

[Applause]

they've got the scent already come along

Come Along

[Applause]

come G boy when I observe your spilling

I silent regret that the noble Squire

allworthy has in the shape and form of

Dr swack

swack yes and myself supplied you with

the very finest materials for building

your brain when all that is required is

a pickaxe and Spade now who said that

boy you did Sir no no no I mean who am I

quoting so good sir I thought you must

have made it up yourself no it is a

quotation from horis boy

Horus but you it's hot in here I thought

that

sir may I open the window great idea

[Music]

boy oh don't just stand there de Dre boy

we have much work to do come

alonga not with that not with that it's

only a cushion stuff with feathers like

your

[Applause]

[Music]

[Applause]

headb do something about who let those

wretched animals loose I what do they

want

anyway sare and te us to bits

[Applause]

[Music]

anyway run Square run they won't attack

us while we're on the move

[Music]

you

[Music]

who is it quick Molly let me

in what's up what's the matter hounds

Fox I can smell it all my clothes oo oh

well never mind all your things I'll put

them in a tub and I'll have them dry in

no time thanks

[Music]

Molly oh Master Tom I never thought I'd

be lucky enough to be taking in your

laundry what with you being up at the

man and me being what I am but as I'm

always saying we're all equal in the

eyes of the Lord

SE some's more equal than others all you

B supposed my cloth

[Music]

what the blazes are you doing up there

I'm not in the habit of couching up a

tree Western without a good cause your

dogs should be shot sir they been my

bres and punct of my posterior good well

let's hope my hounds are none the worse

for it come on let's get out of

here there

help we can't get

down help help help

help help help help help

help help where are you we're up here

you fool what are you doing up there

never mind that boy get us down yes

descend

right anied

position I swear Tom Jones is buying

this he is sir it's all he's doing he

laid a TR Trail for the hounds where is

the lome lad with Molly Seagram and what

I've seen has filled me with revulsion

and disgust they're both naked sir what

where hurry boy follow me where yes if

safire knew should forget Tom Jones in

i' love you for your virtue he is what

if he catch them in the act and then and

then go and tell Sophia you'll get her

hand for sure oh yeah and perhaps not be

ungenerous with her daring I gentlemen

an excellent plan of campaign or in

Latin boy will Moodus

[Music]

operandi I love

you I love

you oh my darling

Sophia it's

Molly but no mind

disgusting

deuring let's get near of the

Window M stinging nle

[Music]

sir look at that the serpent oh oh I'd

like to give her a taste of my K it's

Tom that's led her astray sir yeah and

him too of course I think we've seen

enough silence boy mind the

stinging they've seen us

how do they know you're here that spotty

Blood

Hound follow

[Music]

me get out of here run Tom I'll take

care of these get out of here on get out

of here get out care

that don't ever

[Music]

so much for your planned life you my

plans still his trousers and her

stocking enough evidence I think I see

your point his undoing will be his

undoing ah you look pretty my

dear very pretty indeed indeed Master

bill will be quite smitten he will be

quite smitten father I have no interest

in spotty Master Bill so why should I

see him at all don't argue with me girl

you just put on this beautiful jewelry

part of your

dowy and it will impress

him damn my goat father you've been

drinking again I drink to take away the

pain of the the

go now you come down when I call you

[Applause]

what is

it it's a flock it's

beautiful I don't want you to believe

anything you hear about what I was doing

because I wasn't it doesn't matter

you're here now I'm going to press this

in a book to remind me of your visit you

look so beautiful and so clean I hardly

dare touch you if father finds you here

he'll kill you might as well be dead if

I'm not with

[Music]

you it's Bill he's come to see me I hate

him if he touches One Hair of your head

I'll kill him if I can't marry you then

I'll never

marry one day one day

ah Master B

welcome I trust I haven't called it a

moment of inconvenience what

this best bit of rump ever came out of a

kitchen off you

go see a lot more than that when you're

we you stay here now I'll call her down

sopia

master bffi has

arrived take your cloak off should be

out in a minute get quick now girl be

careful I will and don't get too close

to him I swear those spots are

catching oh you're tickling I know

[Music]

Mr

Tom it's just passing are you calling on

me sir sh I wasn't Squire Weston finds

me in the house you'll shoot me for sure

W true sir don't worry I'll keep quiet

if you will I beg your pardon if you

don't come in at once sir I'll scream

the house down

[Music]

good evening Master B good evening Mr

[Music]

Sophia there AR take him in the library

give him a

drink pretty Philly isn't he

may I say you look as beautiful as the

gift I bring you hardly a

compliment forgive me perhaps you'd care

to help yourself to a glass of cherry

before you leave I don't drink in fact I

have no vices one may even say that my

only Vice is my virtue how D I come to

say that

is I'm an only child and have great

expectations both on my mother's side

and also Squire allworth is being the

next legitimate heir to his

estate I can tell from your expression

you do not find me unattractive oh speak

not until I've had my

say I

come to ask you for your hand in

marriage perfect match and I must say

that is a magnificent ring it is a ruby

perhaps you'd care for a closer look

Master BL since it is only my DIY that

interests you yes

no no I truly love you would seal it

with a kiss upon your

R are you unwell a faint I think oh oh

poor girl needs air air

yes that's quite enough Master blil for

it was only the thought of marrying you

that made me dizzy oh understandable

reaction for all your learning Master

blil you don't understand anything can't

you get it into your head that I love

another and I think you know who would

these be his trousers which were taken

off this afternoon at the same time as

this stocking which belongs to Molly

Seagram a girl of ill repute lies lies

lies get out you miserable ugly

Lo well how did it go my

boy [ __ ] has a fine Spirit did you

discuss marriage it was mentioned yes

how proud I'd be to have you for a

son ever again I don't want to see him

ever again you better be talking about

Tom I don't want to see anyone least of

all that bill and don't tell me to go to

my room because I'm going and you can

stay there

excuse me sir you're new here aren't you

PR sir I started yesterday this is my

first post a bit early you I'm only 16

sir I need to be a bit early very

true you a virgin oh yes sir I am

indeed good I'll give you to the count

of 10 and if I find you one two three

five

6

8

[Applause]

[Music]

[Applause]

9 if you don't Master D I'll scream but

I don't love you Lizzy you want us yet

so I sh miss it come on Master

THS it's a drink he's always the same

the bed in case he comes in here and

finds out what you're up to

[Music]

me where are you

[Music]

it's up to my virginity I'm the only 16

quit under the

[Music]

bed I'm

coming I'm after

[Music]

you how do you do I'm Tom Jones I'm

hiding as well I can still see

you I can still see you too yeah in the

middle don't worry I'll PR protect you

thank you sir I'm mortal feared if he

looks under here and sees me he will not

be bothered with you thank you sir

you're ever so nice not at

all sh still be

still I can't find me Quarry damn it I

haven't the puff left the what

Squire un second

[Music]

thought master

no no remember you're only 16 and still

a virgin I'm only 17 and it has to go

sometime oh fire

[Music]

oh forgive me Sophia it's just been one

of those days

[Music]

yep yep

yep father

father

father father where are you you're

virtuous girl she mustn't find me here

I'll hide under the bed

[Music]

where are you where's my father my Ruby

Ring's been stolen not been here miss

have you seen him Prudence no

[Music]

Miss so there you are my pretty

oh you're well Advanced for 16 aren you

yes

[Music]

sir you dirty little

bastard teach you to steal my daughter's

ring

T father out of my where are you going

he's stolen your rig it wasn't Tom

father

father Tom

[Music]

Tom why didn't you tell me this earlier

we didn't want to SP supp I tried to

tell Miss Sophia but she wouldn't

believe me these clothes are the bru we

saw

everything he's a winch and a bu a bad

lot sir I don't believe Tom's that bad

and you say this this stocking is Molly

serums I was there sir you saw

everything well almost everything all

that I have said is true sir he's a

colding cookle sir he's like a mad sto

we haven't told you the rest sir to save

you the pain what you mean there's more

no no no no no sneaking boy no mention

of the Vic's wife the vica's wife only

once or twice so during organ practice

the devil Young Jack Apes it's usually V

girls they do say that even Sophia let

not our silence boy we don't know for

sure no no this is the faintest chance

that it's the truth how did things come

to such a pass and without my knowing

we've only just discovered ourselves and

I've been so kind to the boy where is he

now out wenching I expect no no we must

not assume the obvious we mustn't forget

that Thursday is organ practice by

Heavens when I get my hands on that

boy hello I think we ought to leave

there boy sorry I'm late Tom

Jones Tom Jones I'm a reasonable

man I can't explain so

already

[Music]

[Applause]

already you bastards be to my house

and W you all

right what he done with the ruby ring

missing part of my daughter's St stolen

by that boy he was in my house are you

sure certain sure he was in bed with two

of my Maids two double proof a thief as

well as a leer

after Master Tom Tom Jones Tom Jones

Come Back come on let's get after him

right

he's got a good start wait

hurry keep up behind there

[Music]

I'm uh sorry we haven't got a run for

you so am I it's a cold night shall I go

around and lock up now Mrs Waters yeah

Sam you lock

up there uh there is a bed you can

have that's

mine I would like to put you

out you won't

we'll be

[Music]

sharing what's your

name

Tom not seen you somewhere

before don't think so

now well you're going to be a a good boy

aren't you

Tom is my father here they all rode off

after young Tom Mr Weston top the London

Road

[Music]

where's Tom Jones his horse is here

everyone's a bed I just locked down H

upstairs in one of the bedrooms yeah we

mustn't let him get

away you try there right open

it

open don't

he's at it again where's the ring what

ring search him I search the

wi

mad see where you tell me what ring

whose ring am I supposed to stolen fire

be B dare you enter my private

quarters if that's where you hidden it

that's what I'm going to

se evil

[Music]

this is what they're after they think

you stole it but it was safe all the

time the ring he does have it yes but

hold him

the you come

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

Stand and Deliver

it's black B drive on man do try a

moving Target's a more sporting

shot everybody out your money or your

life one of you do something Madam

you're a disgrace to your sex but

they'll stretch your neck for it someday

what a gentle and feminine thought and

how delicately expressed I suppose you

you madam Grace are sex hold your tongue

you won't you join

us or would you like an instant cure for

your cold certainly not no just on my

way

down what hosts are exposed are

we I was in a hurry to catch the coach

well I'm delighted you caught

it hands above your head and don't try

anything I can hit a fob watch at 40

paces and it won't bother me if you

happen to be wearing

it no purse on this one no purse sir you

heard what the Ruffian said take your

hat off when you're talking to a

lady a head for money and no brains for

hiding

it now I wonder what you

have nothing at all on the contrary

young sir

you appear to have everything keep them

up ahuh what do I have here that belongs

to the girl I love oh let's have a look

at

it ah a

ruby well let's see what other Jewels

you have hidden

[Applause]

thieving wretch I thought to get you

both with one ball I doubt you'd get me

with

[Music]

two you'll swing a tyon tree for this

you'll not live to see

[Music]

it he got away then yes and made his way

to London where he took lodgings and no

one knew where he was and no one cared

except

Sophia a tragedy struck BFF's mother

Bridget who had pass

away first to get the news was BFFL who

with the tutors hurried to the old chest

in her bedroom was that where she was

laying no that's where the will was

kept so little I'm so sorry that you

wasn't in Time Master P oh all worthy

doesn't even know yet it's still out

hunting never mind uh what's that squire

I'll see to

it oh that'll be all

Nelly well what does it

say forgive me but Tom was my own son by

The Late Captain blle before we went I

did not tell you before because of your

high opinion and ever loving sister

Bridget Tomas her son that means that

you and here

destroyed boy nobody must find out come

on we mustn't be seen

here meanwhile in London in his lodgings

young Tom was very

desperate all he could think of Sophia

and how he missed her and how unjust

life was dearest Sophia here is my

address I miss

[Music]

you so

[Music]

much and think only of you if only you

could come to London

dear lady belliston I write to ask you a

great favor your much appreciated

invitation arrived

yesterday and I wonder whether it would

be possible for you to include one Mr

Thomas

Jones little for you I hope it's money

cuz you owe me five Shillings rent when

I get work Mrs belter I'll pay you

that's what you said last week no rent

room well go on I'm open

it oh money eh money Mrs Belair is not a

subject of gentleman care to discuss oh

ear and Graces you ain't no gent then

why would lady belliston invite me to

her

ball you are

ined to attend and Lady belliston masked

costume

B thank

you wait a

minute I got an idea what well you ain't

such a bad looking

lad and it has been a long

time so so why don't you I mean I mean

why don't we what do you mean oh come on

come on you know I mean

yes sh shall we go to my

room I'll tell you what Mrs beler what

you go to your

room anything you

say I'll stay

[Music]

inline Miss sfia Weston's

request we're invited to attend lady

Bell's mask costume ball

which Miss Weston is

attending costume

[Music]

ball Sir William and Lady Fitz moris

[Music]

The Honorable Mr chetworth Lacy and Mrs

chetworth

[Applause]

[Music]

La Squire Western and Miss Sophia

Western suia my dear so delighted you

could be here and of course dear Squire

a m cannot SK your Splendid figure no

yours your

lady and this is Lord FMA Squire won and

his daughter sopia W Sophia the drinks

are at the far end off you go

myar so that's the fell well worth

backing Lord felar if you could secure

her hand in marriage your gambling debts

would be no problem she has a sizable D

it would be nice to get one's hands on

that as well

we'll have to think of a way

particularly as most of your gambling

debts are owe to

[Music]

me

Mr sorry don't bother to announce me

I'll introduce myself after I've

eaten who is that Mr R

excuse me sir we're not dining until

midnight Mr Thomas

Jones I'm lady

belliston at your service my lady I'm so

glad you could come and how clever of

you to dress as a street urchin street

urchin yes I thought it would be

different do you know where Sophia is so

difficult with all these masks you'll

find her don't worry shall we

[Music]

[Music]

dance and

no wonder she was so anxious to see

[Music]

you I have a plan I rather help you

would follow

me no sir I will not dance with you

neither do I care for young men who

cannot hold their liquor neither do I

Madam allow me to hold it for

you well thank you sir I um don't

believe I've had the pleasure Madam I'm

sure you would remember if you

had if you want to make sure of sopia

Lord felar this is my plan I shall

invite Tom Jones to my bu and while he

is being unfaithful to the girl you are

to walk in with her she'll cry on my

shoulder and then you will bring her to

the library to um comfort her an

excellent plan yes it certainly struck

me when I was dancing what's your seats

like I beg your pardon on a horse star I

only ride behind horses father has

brought me a most ornate Carriage indeed

and I have a most magnificent pair M I

trust a handle

[Music]

B your friend Thomas thing is

here

where I'll show you after this boring

dance is

over where Sophia you said she was

waiting here you'll see her soon but

first no no what are you doing I must

find

Sophia please

[Music]

but how did they get the explosives in

in the first place it was all part of

the plot yes but what about the guard

what was that fellow n i mean offered

them a pecul all your valuables in here

gentlemen what a damn good costume black

best the lady

Highwayman if you can find me later you

can get them back mistaking that costume

I'll find you don't you worry me too and

first I hope

[Music]

oh

you you too listen if you get me away

this pistol is loaded and you won't live

to get the reward on my head don't worry

all I want is that

ring all

right but not

[Music]

here leave the

way she played that Shard as though

she'd done it many times

before be strange if she turned out to

be the real black Bez wouldn't

[Laughter]

it not again get inside

now you and I have some unfinished

business together or should I say

unstarted

business shall we dispense with your

clothing can I put my hands down oh yes

[Music]

thank you for the dance I sure you lady

frog more the pleasure must have been

entirely yours where is he where's Tom

follow me my dear

have you seen her no nor I that purse of

mine had 100 GES we search the house

from top to bottom oh what a fetching

little thing you

are what's your name um Tom

ma'am keep still damn you

he's in here at last and didn't find

settle I

[Music]

hit

no

no Lo

it and come back here

here this store's locked she must be in

there well we've looked everywhere else

come on come on know you're there up

open up I say that's

fer give me the ring if I don't get it

back I'll lose her forever ah who knows

perhaps next

time the library you shall be

disturbed hold

on here here sit

there

cie I shall do my best to help you get

over it now here drink this it's brand

de here we

are oh

hold it hold it hold it more more more

more there good girl good good my head

he

spinning how kind you are I haven't even

started yet Queen help me it's too much

too

[Music]

much Miss Weston have you seen her I

think you'll find her in the library

with Lord f sir which way down to the

end of the hall turned right and then

turn left sir uh through the Blue Room

past the study and then turned left of

the conservatory sir if I were you I

wouldn't interrupt him sir his passion

for young ladies makes him most

ill-tempered when Disturbed in his

advances please

no h what what give me interrupting your

adves oh I'm H you young devil I love

get Sophia how could you listen I can

explain

everything it wasn't Tom father it was

Lord

Fel get

dressed all right it was felar but Tom

Jones still has the ring and I'm going

to set the law on him and he's going to

stay in jail until he remembers where it

is and tomorrow we'll announce your

engagement to BFI and you'll be in and

out of church quicker than a Fiddler's

Elbow but father a shut up sh you'll be

married this week There's a hunt every

day except Sunday square and it'll be

Sunday and you go up you

[Applause]

go I'm

[Applause]

rich hello young man

what did you do steal a loaf of

bread no they think I stole a ring

that's

life I stole a loaf of bread and I've

been here 10 years 10 years lucky you're

sharing with

me

byy I've lost the girl I

love unless I get the ring back I'll be

in here for life

to cap it all I'm bornn on the wrong

side of the blanket I'm a bastard how

can I be

lucky I'll show you if you promise to

keep it a

secret I

promise I wouldn't tell you but I'm

getting a bit fee and I need some

help uh

a t 10 years of hard

work so getting rid of the soil was the

hardest what did you do with it I ate it

[Music]

we've been going for Miles don't you

worry we're here now where you'll see

come on

[Music]

bottles no more we don't want to overdo

it now not over there that's rubbish

over there there's still some of the

Lord May's La feat two of the 51 a Margo

and a Jin come on come

on careful don't wag them about quickly

boy a couple of handles of back and a

few sheroes

come help yourself take all you

can no not that stuff as yesterday's

over

here they think it's the rats what make

something

mad he does

come

on yeah come

on we're back in the

cell I thought we were going to escape

Escape are you mad they H you for that

we've got it made we are do you realize

that while they're starving to death

outside we can spend the rest of our

lives in Comfort rest of our lives in

here I like you so I'm going to let you

into me other

secret go on try some of that cheese

very good shed you can gorge yourself on

it not to be confused with that stuff

from the

colonies what's your other secret I'll

tell you off to dinner open a Claret

drop of wine won't do us any

harm you know a drop a pork goes down

well over it they haven't got any

vintage stuff in at the moment mind you

they're very good as a rule yeah give me

[Applause]

that look after the girls s

I'm going to bed for the puking starts

yes Mrs

[Applause]

[Laughter]

Walters as you all know this party is to

celebrate the engagement of my daughter

with young Master B alas my beautiful

daughter Sophia is in dispose but such

is her desire to W that I've gone to

Great trouble to arrange it without

DeLay So gentlemen drink up and toast

the lucky bridegroom Mr

B any chance of you taking a wife

against Square every chance providing it

someone else is and no one finds out a

man should be free but Master blil is to

marry Sophia I said the

man a man should be free to live his own

life without the complications of having

a wife to do as he chooses and not as

he's taught to here and there and never

get

CAU

[Applause]

and a husband to none a lover to all

with only himself to

obey if you have to wet them in order to

B them just tip your hat and walk

[Music]

[Applause]

away is that the advice you give the

bridegroom blier he's not a man then

why' you want your daughter to marry him

cuz he's coming with the money and to

keep her away from Lees like you

come

now we're escaping yes that and leave

all this and

this look at the Beauties I'll keep them

supplied in wine and Beck you see and in

exchange they give me a bit of the other

it's been going on like this every night

for

years so that's your big secret no my

big secret is I'm only 26

care hello girls I bought some help

out of the way this one's

[Applause]

mine you you

too I'm afraid this is the last time we

meet time to swing

tomorrow what are you doing in this hell

home I still think I have the ring

without it I can't prove I'm

innocent then I can do one good deed

before I

go they found everything else

this had a certain sentimental

B you don't have to swing this there's a

way

out

what oh you

[Music]

darling it's light this every night I

got 10 more years to go aren't I lucky

[Applause]

[Music]

down there you'll find a trap door at

the end leading through to a

shop good

luck where are you going come on no I'm

going to call the Jailer when they see

this they'll let me go you mad they'll

have it off you and swear they've never

seen it get out then give it back and

they'll drop the charges against you but

they hang you for escaping he was forced

to leave with a desperate woman who's

had horses is waiting outside for a week

now eat the

way thank you

[Music]

[Applause]

best

hipip hip

hip you follow 5 minutes after us

mustn't appear too

eager 5 minutes no more

come on come on we'll be late last

night's rivalry Master blle hasn't

helped your complexion the lad's pale

he's worried about the plight of his

cousin to Such a Pity he couldn't be

with us it is now get in the West's part

is waiting for us to join him hurry up

come on get in there

[Music]

good luck

[Music]

Miss off with your w we with you

[Applause]

that

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

Bloody [ __ ] e getting on

dev's Happ don't stop him

[Music]

Uncle drive off stop the coach we'll all

be killed stop the

co I got

[Music]

[Music]

go oh

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

Miss sopia where is she she's already

left to Wed Master BFF Hill sir I reckon

they'll be arriving at the church just

now come on

[Music]

[Applause]

on come on come on L quick quick Li get

in get in

[Applause]

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

where is everybody they've all be in

church by namis you'll be returning in

master BFF's coach Miss Sophia so I'll

get back to help at the

house God bless

you and help

[Music]

you come on round your cup round your

cup come on

[Music]

[Music]

no no no not yet I'm afraid there's been

a slight delay my dear let me explain

[Music]

[Applause]

we've lost them again damn Nation all

right back to the church

[Music]

[Music]

well at least the bridegroom has arrived

that's something I suppose I really

cannot wait any longer we must proceed

with the ceremony

[Music]

[Applause]

[Applause]

[Music]

come

[Applause]

on we nearly had

him take the H home the best Trace he's

given us you ruin the

wedding well we're here aren't we where

sopia I'm here

father you look

beautiful I've never been so happy in my

life

Tom Jones what we're married father

married you can't marry a bastard or FL

Your Hide for them stop sir he's less of

a bastard than you are and you Shar whip

him for that watch this what are you

talking about woman he's not a bastard

that's what it's out now are you not

then his mother what am I to think what

am I to do if you AR his mother

then

who it was your sister Squire I tell you

it was she who bought Tom Jones I swear

it wasn't me she gave me gold she paid

me quite a bit she did to say that Tommy

was my kid Tom Jes he was sold down the

river

Tom he was cut to the

quick he never complained got the short

end of the

stick before she died your sister left a

note and in that note your sister

Bridget wrote

everything I am Telling You Tom's your

nephew tried and

true as a hero he's the greatest and

who's

the the world has ever known would you

believe Tom Jones Tom Jones are you

listening squir

tomes he's a natural

air you've got to admit should be

treated fair and

square it was your nephew blle it was

him that stole the note he stole the

note your sister Bridget wrote he threw

that note Straight Into the Fire and

that's the truth Believe Miss Squire you

got to treat right you

[Music]

treat well what about that then Squire

marvelous my daughter has married a

man watch the feathers flying through

the

Countryside 10 to one it's not the fo

it's got to be theones boy wives and

daughters sign to be by his side worried

men all checking locks and baring up the

doors but once a girl sets her by on

this boy no man alive can keep her

awake all the ladies in the county come

to know him one by one he provides the

kind of loving that can keep a woman

young every girl is longing for a very

own Jones

boy maybe you're a man who likes a

simple

life dozing by the Fireside or lazing in

the sunshine if you've got a sweetheart

or a pretty

wife don't be overconfident she may be

slipping out cuz once a girl sets her

eye on this lover boy no man alive can

keep her

way all the ladies in the county come to

know him one by one he provides the kind

of loving that can keep a woman young

every girl is longing for a very own

Jones

[Music]

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