Original subtitles

? Hazel moved to the city, feeling all alone ?

? Till her whole life changed with a pair quite strange ?

? 'Cause in reality ?

? They're her new OddParents, Fairly OddParents ?

- * Wands and wings ? - * Floaty crowny things ?

? OddParents, Fairly OddParents ?

? A new wish for magic hijinks ?

? Fish guy, pizza fries ?

? Penny-farthing dirt bike rides ?

? Ghost snoops, major whoops ?

? Baryonyx, time loops ?

? Pretty great, you've got it made ?

? With Fairly OddParents! ?

Hey, class.

I'm sorry I'm late.

Ow.

Was just putting the finishing touches

on our chart for Kindness Day.

Kindness Day challenges all students

to complete one kind act over the course of the day.

And there's a prize--

a pizza party!

A-mamma mia.

I'll be using the chart to track your participation.

Uh-oh, Dev, you dropped your eraser on the filthy,

filthy ground.

You're welcome.

Mr. Guzman, did you mark my kind act?

Is it pizza time?

Very good, Hazel.

But the class must have 100% participation

to get the pizza party.

We either all get pizza or none of us do.

My fellow classmates, I humbly

request that you rise to the challenge of completing

a kind act, just as I have risen to the top

of Mr. Guzman's head.

Please, if not for the sake of kindness,

then for the sake of pizza.

Pass.

Pizza's overrated.

Well, Dev, even if you don't want pizza,

you'll still help us get it.

Right?

Out of the kindness of your heart?

Out of the what of my what?

Mean old Dev is not gonna mess this up for everyone.

I wish I could convince Dev to participate in Kindness Day.

Ooh.

We know just the pea pod people for the job.

Pea pod.

Pea pod people?

Greetings.

Wha--

We are the Pe-az, an intergalactic

peace negotiating team.

I am our strategical leader.

I'm the optimism captain.

He saves his voice for verbal negotiations.

He's our closer.

How can we help today?

I need to get this kid, Dev, to participate

in Kindness Day.

But he doesn't want to.

That'll be easy-peasy.

We've been settling human disputes for centuries--

the Treaty of Versailles, the Treaty of Westphalia,

and the Burger Fry Treaty of 1950.

Pizza is the key to all our negotiations.

But Dev doesn't care about pizza.

Perhaps you have just not offered him the right kind.

Everyone cares for pizza.

It's the universe's most powerful incentive.

So powerful, in fact, that we have a switch that allows

us to turn it on and off.

Turn pizza off?

As in--

Better to have no pizza at all

than to have it fall into the wrong hands.

Brothers, assimilate.

I can taste the pizza already.

Here's the plan.

You, Cosmo, and Wanda will create opportunities for Dev

to be kind.

And we'll make sure he follows through.

I wish Dev had extra milk he could spare.

Fellow classmate, my brother likes milk

and did not get any today.

It seems you have a surplus of it, hmm?

Hazmat, did you put them up to this?

If you share with us, we will share our many

pizza bagel-o's with you.

But that's just pizza with a hole in it.

Pass.

No!

Wanda!

My beautiful wife.

She had so much life ahead of her.

Cosmo, I'm right here.

Don't cry over spilled milk.

That child just turned down pizza bagel-o's?

Oh, man, the pizzas for the party are here,

and Dev still hasn't done a kind act.

We gotta step it up.

I wish the Pe-az had something big to carry.

Then Dev could do a kind act by holding the door for them.

Coming right up.

Excuse me, uh, kind sir.

Would you hold the door for us?

These are quite awkward to carry.

What do I look like, a doorstop?

If you help us, we will share some of our ice cream pizza

with you.

Pizza and ice cream?

Double pass.

Ow.

Who are you?

Tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk.

We must switch tactics.

You don't mean the closer?

Hazel, I hope you understand the gravity of this situation.

Out of the 293 negotiations we've mediated,

I've only had to participate in three.

They call me the closer for a reason.

After this meeting, I can assure you

that Dev will participate in Kindness Day,

and you will get that pizza party.

I'll be out in 30 minutes or less.

Oh, we aren't going with him?

You don't want to be in there.

He plays hardball in his negotiations.

We're talking counting down from five,

throwing tantrums, asking the same question over

and over and over again.

Sounds about right.

Get your Parmesan ready, squirt.

Looks like you're gonna get that pizza party after all.

Yay!

There he is, our champion.

He out-negotiated me.

Gasp.

I don't know what happened.

It was going just fine until he said,

teeny little greedy who has to do whatever I says says what.

And-- and--

What did you say?

I said, what.

Hazel, we're sorry we failed you.

The rules of negotiation state that we

must join forces with anyone who out-negotiates us.

What?

So you're on his side now?

Well, well, well.

Would you look at that?

Now I have the pizza and your little friends.

You'll never get your pizza party now, Hatchet.

Dimmadelphia's Action News 4 at 4:00.

And we're rolling.

Live at Dimmadelphia in Richmond Academy, where

Hazel Wells and Dev Dimmadome are

in a greasy pizza negotiation.

Will they reach a resolution before the cheese grows cold?

Hey, listen, Dev.

I'm gonna push a wagon into the room.

You place the pizza on the wagon.

Send it back out.

We can put this whole thing behind us.

Capisce?

What?

Where's the pizza?

And now, more news.

Thoughts on the pizza.

You think Hazel can get it back from Dev?

Ugh.

At this point, I think it'd be easier to get

our own pizza from Saucy's.

Dev, I have someone here that wants to talk to you.

Now what's she doing?

She's trying to use someone close to you

to appeal to your emotions.

No one's close to me.

Um, hello, son.

It is I, your father, Deli.

It's Dale.

I mean Dale.

Dad?

You took off work for this?

Um, sure.

Dad!

It means so much that you would--

wait.

Who are you?

Dill-- Pickle--

Dimmadome.

Never Dad.

Dev, wait.

That's it.

I'm done playing these games.

You three, you know a lot about negotiations for some reason.

How do I end this?

You could take pizza off the table completely.

Our pizza switch has the ability to get

rid of all pizza in the world.

How could you?

The rules say we are to be on his side now.

For some reason, even more news.

Presto pesto.

Sources report that all the pizza in the world is gone.

Any-a minute now.

I swear it wasn't me this time.

Any-a minute now.

Take-a your time.

A-pizza is a patience.

I won.

There's no more boxes of pizza in the cafeteria.

No more pizza in the world.

It's over.

On Kindness Day?

Everyone loves pizza, Dev.

Not everyone.

I'm lactose intolerant.

What?

If we won that pizza party, I'd

have to watch you all eat the pizza in my face

and go on and on about how ooey

and gooey and greasy and tasty it is.

Like I said, pass.

If I can't have pizza, no one can.

But, Dev, we could have ordered

you some lactose-free pizza.

I thought that was just a myth.

It's very real and very good.

But you would have to turn that pizza

switch back on to get some.

And we both know you won't do that.

So--

She's using an advanced negotiation technique--

reverse psychology.

But will he go for it?

It worked.

He turned the pizza back on.

Bringing pizza back counts as a kind act in my book.

Congratulations.

Yes! Whoo-hoo!

You know, Dev, I sure wish we had some pizza for you

right now.

I've got a cashew cheese pizza

here for a Dev Dimmadome.

It's just like you said it would be--

ooey and gooey and greasy and tasty.

Uh, I mean, it's OK.

And that's the story of the most difficult negotiation

Earth has ever seen.

The Lactose Treaty of Dimmadelphia.

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