Original subtitles

Donald?

Catherine...

...this just isn't working out, right?

....sculpture or..

...computer generated graphics.

It doesn't matter what style you chose to work in.

Whether it's primitivism, -...

...romantic realism, postmodern deconstructivism.

The same rules apply.

Everything is governed by the laws of nature.

Nowhere is this principle -...

...more perfectly manifested than in the human form.

Excuse me.

Ehm, is this the, eh...

Light study?

Wait a minute, don't tell me, let me guess.

Lily Leonetti.

Two weeks and 30 minutes late.

Sorry. Family emergency.

It's alright, come on in.

Let's get you setup over here.

I don't think Catherine's coming back.

Alright, let's stay focused, folks.

We were talking about learning the rules -...

...before you break them.

Specifically, perspective and proportion -...

...as it relates to the human body.

Which brings us back to Isabel.

So, see if you can discover the hidden truths -...

...of shadows and the light.

Translate what you see through your arms and finger tips -...

...on to the page.

Is this 508 Alta?

I'm Gredin.

Lily.

I know.

Thank you.

Follow me.

The entrance is in the back.

I'm Lily, the new room mate.

Oh, you're here.

I'm Tanya, by the way.

Anything in this cupboard is mine.

And the living room is off limits -

And the living room is off limits because that's where I practice.

Bridgette, Lily.

English major, right?

No, art.

Painting.

That's funny, I would never have guessed.

Well, I can see we're off to a good start.

Hai.

Is she always like that?

Unfortunately yes.

What about that guy, Gredin?

Gredin is really cool and an amazing sculptor.

And that's Robert.

A major talent.

Well, here we are.

It's not exactly the Beal Air.

In fact it's not even The Ramada.

It's nice.

Where did you say you were from again?

Michigan.

First time to L.A.?

First time anywhere, really.

Well, the world of bytes is calling.

I gotta run.

How's L.A., kiddo?

Hi dad, it's good.

It's nice.

Well, this place feels pretty empty without you.

Hold on, your mum wants to talk to you.

OK.

Hi mum.

Did you like your surprise?

Hold on a sec.

What is it?

It's just a little something to remind you of us.

You know, I don't know why you had to go all the way to L.A. -...

...to be an artist.

We could have bought you a car if you wanted to stay.

Mary Jane you know, Catherine's daughter -...

...she went to state and she's very happy -...

...making all sorts of arts and crafts.

Mum, do we have to have this conversation again?

Where's daddy?

Bob.

Oh, he's gone off somewhere.

I gotta go.

Go? We just got on?

Mum, I'm gonna be late for class?

OK, will we see you at Thanksgiving?

I don't know yet, mum. I haven't looked up my schedule.

I try, OK?

Fine, don't forget to call me.

That's Peter, performance artist.

Or as he likes to refer to it:

'Self as show'.

Some day with any luck -...

...somebody will put him out of his misery.

Look at her, Lily.

What do you see?

I see...

...a face.

And a body.

And what else?

I see a naked woman.

Right.

The whole naked woman, not just parts.

Not just the head.

Soft skin.

Cloaked breast.

And a waist.

Legs, the whole thing.

Get it all on the page.

Keep going over again and again and eventually -...

Technic will give way for expression.

Thank you.

Or expression -...

...will give way to expression.

You have some thoughts you'd like to share with us?

Me?

Thought? Share?

No, I couldn't possibly.

I'm here to listen and learn.

Copy and conform.

From the masterpiece you just created, -...

...it's obvious you have transcended -...

...all need for traditional form.

This, my fellow students was created -...

...out of no other tradition -...

...without form.

This -...

...this is an A plus.

This is a perfect example -...

...of a 100 percent surrender -...

...to the process of tradition.

It is so lifelike -...

...you can almost fuck it.

You through?

Will you get back to work?

Jack ass.

You OK?

Can I come in?

No, I'm not dressed.

I'm sorry about earlier.

It had nothing to do with you.

January 28th.

It's late and I'm wide awake.

Burning up, bored.

Feel like dancing.

Having some fun.

Like turning someone over.

Tease, taunt...

...twist him around my little finger.

Taking him to places he never knew he wanted to go.

Bad places.

Dark places.

Great places.

February 1st. Selfportraits.

To expose it all.

To see myself the way a lover would.

No shame, no fear.

Not a fear in the world.

Nothing hidden, no secrets.

Nothing hidden...

...no secrets.

With you I'm so foolish it hurts.

The mouth wants to speak -...

...but only knows the wrong thing to say.

Without you there is no flower -...

...and nothing good grows in the garden of my heart...

I understand you are looking for a babysitting job?

Bridgette. Shut that shit off.

I'm gonna kill her.

You wanna help? Good.

I was thinking fat pills.

She's always saying if she gains one more pound -...

...she's gonna kill herself.

Suicide? Very good.

Thank you.

I got a job.

Doing what?

Babysitting.

How totally sweet.

...

She hates me.

I'm a little sensitive now.

You two know each other?

We do but she might not wanna know me now.

Tell her I'm not half bad, Tanya.

I wish I was half as good as you, Gredin.

Come on, I'll make it up to you.

Nothing ventured, nothing gained, right?

I got carried away with Donald -...

I shouldn't have put you in the middle of it.

No, I probably overreacted.

I can sometimes be hypersensitive.

You shouldn't be, you got it.

The only person in class -...

...whose hand the teacher has to hold.

Well, Falk has a thing for his female undergraduates.

Especially when they look like you.

What is this?

This is my magical craft.

I'm sort of hoping it will win me at Guggenheim.

You'll get it.

You psychic?

No. You deserve it.

So where were you the first two weeks?

Well...

...when I applied -...

I never thought I'd get accepted.

And I was... I just freaked.

No big family emergency.

Just my little private one.

That's all.

That's enough.

You see that hill over there?

That's Beverly Hills. That's my home.

Might as well be Timbuktu.

My father and I we don't talk any more.

What are you thinking?

Making a wish.

What do you wish?

That I could just...

...open my eyes and be different.

Silly of me.

Hey, listen.

...

You're beautiful.

No, I'm not.

Yes, you are.

You're sweet.

You're beautiful.

And different.

March 1st.

How do you know what you can do -...

...until you do it?

How do you know who you can have -...

...until you've had them?

I didn't know him from Adam.

But I knew exactly what he needed.

What he needed was me.

A dark club.

Loud music.

A corner to ourselves.

Anonymous. Shameless.

No past. No future.

Song: Valeria Andrews- 'What's Come Over Me'

Tease.

Taunt.

Twist him around my little finger.

No shame. No fear.

Without a fear in the world.

Looking good.

That guy's a loser.

Besides, I have a lot more to offer than just a fine young body.

I have it up here.

That's too bad.

All I'm really interested in is your body.

Same time, same place?

Maybe.

Hey there.

Well, what do you think?

It's...

...intense.

There's something very tragic and terribly -...

...exciting that has happened in your life.

See, women only change their hair if it's one of the two.

I don't know.

I think I was just bored.

Oh, come on, I bet it was something exciting.

Like what?

I confess, I'm not really a fortune teller.

You've such a pretty face, you shouldn't hide it behind that new hairstyle.

Donald?

Thought I'd find you here.

Lily, meet Angela, my wife.

Angela, this is Lily, our new babysitter.

Nice to meet you, Lily.

12 Mississippi.

13 Mississippi.

14 Mississippi.

15 Mississippi.

I'm ready.

16 Mississippi.

Lily, hurry up.

17,18, 19 -...

...20.

Daphna?

Got you.

I must say, Daphna -...

...you are a great hider.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

Those are pictures of daddy's paintings.

He doesn't like to paint anymore.

Why?

Mama says it's because painting makes him crazy.

Daphna, where are you?

I'm gonna hide again.

Hi baby.

What you've been up to?

I did the portrait.

Great.

Angela's getting back to her photography.

She always said she'd give Daphna four years -...

...but lucky Daphna got a full seven.

Right.

Why don't you take Lily home?

Hello, I'm hiding but no one's coming to find me.

...

So...

So, why don't you tell me a little bit about yourself, Lily?

Where was it you were from?

You'll laugh.

Kalamazoo, Michigan.

Born and bred.

....

Well, that's a big move, huh?

All the way out to California by yourself?

I was really scared at first.

I think I made the right decision.

Definitely.

Can't afford to be afraid at your stage of the game.

Right up here?

Yeah, that's it.

I guess I better let you off.

Thanks a lot.

Your bag.

Thanks.

Listen, if you wanna show me some of your other works sometime -...

I'd love to see it.

Like when, right after class?

Yeah, I'm in the studio every afternoon.

Back of the faculty building.

Yeah, maybe I'll do that.

...

June 1st.

Ivy's philosophy, number 21.

Never fall in love.

For as long as I can break somebody's heart -...

...that's love enough for me.

How do you know what you can do -...

...until you do it?

How are you?

Good, and you?

I'm good.

Thirsty?

Sure.

You don't like it?

I think you look incredibly sexy.

I'm glad you like it.

Did Donald like it?

I saw him dropping you off.

Seems like you're becoming a regular teacher's pet.

No, just his babysitter.

Do you still think that I'm different?

Beautiful?

May I?

May I?

Song: Valeria Andrews 'Aching for You'

There I was again.

Going out into the unknown, just because.

Do you remember me?

Take me with you.

I can't.

You didn't think I'd come, did you?

I wasn't sure.

Bring it here.

Great Midwest.

Looks nice.

Thanks.

Good student.

Student?

Well... Still very cautious.

Careful.

You know, it's...

...it's sort of funny to me -...

...the way you can -...

...teach and judge -...

...and yet you yourself no longer paint.

You think that's funny?

No, actually I think it's bullshit.

What do you propose to do about it?

I don't know.

See...

...being an artist...

...in order to be a serious artist -...

...you have to be willing to sacrifice everything.

You have to confront your demons.

Go into battle with them.

That's what I want.

I'm ready for that.

Really?

I lost a few battles along the way myself.

That's why I stopped painting.

Well then, maybe -...

I can help you face your fears?

And you can help me face mine?

You sure?

Sit down.

Do it.

Take off your clothes.

Does that prospect frighten you?

Yeah, a little.

Then all the more reason to do it, right?

Simone Shook: Deeper...

See ya.

Tomorrow?

I'm really late for work.

You know, you make me feel like one of those seduced and abandonded cases.

This isn't a boy-girl thing, Gredin.

This is a work thing...

Are you sure?

Don't be so insecure.

Hi, this is Lily. I can't get to the phone -...

...so leave your message after the beep. Thanks.

Got you.

We're having a party tonight.

It's gonna be pretty loud so -...

I just thought I'd let you know.

Fuck her.

Yo, over here.

Hey, you beautiful man.

Stop pushing to me.

My god, it's so high.

Why put a sculpture all the way up here?

Here's beer.

...

You better not dance with anybody but me tonight.

You're so sexy.

Fuck him.

Oh, there's gonna be so much fun.

Fuck'em all.

Are you out of your mind?

Why would you wanna do something like that?

Self expression?

Wait a minute, first you cut off all your hair -...

...then you pierce your belly button -...

...and now you're smoking?

What the hell's going on with you?

Tanya, don't you have a super highway -...

...you need to get on?

Why don't you go out and have some fun?

I was just leaving.

Guess I won't introduce you to Roxanne.

What should I have?

How about an Ice breaker?

And what exactly is an Ice breaker?

Turn around and I'll show you.

Don't move.

Ice breaker it is.

Thanks.

Dance with me.

Oh my god.

No one's safe with you around.

Yeah, you've got a problem with that?

Hi, this is Lily, I can't get to the phone -...

...so leave me a message after the beep.

Thanks.

Lily, it's your mum.

Lily, we're worried about you.

Your dad want's to talk to you.

Hey kiddo, how you doing?

Please call home, darling -...

...your mother's driving me crazy.

Hey, we'll see you at Thanksgiving, right?

God.

Is that the time?

I'm late for Donald's class.

So we're late for professor Falks class?

What's the big deal?

I wanna go. That's what the big deal is.

So go.

What do you think I'm trying to do?

What are you doing for Thanksgiving?

I don't know yet.

Bridgette, Tanya and Robert are gonna go home.

It's gonna get rather lonely around here.

What about you? What are you gonna do?

Who was that on the phone?

I don't know.

Somebody who obviously didn't want to talk to me.

You know, there seem to be a whole lot of 'I don't know'.

Don't.

What's the matter?

What did I do?

You tell me.

What are you doing?

I wanna know, Lily.

I really can't have this conversation right now -...

...because I'm late for class.

I don't know who you are anymore.

I don't know who I'm making love to anymore.

If this is some kind of contest, Lily...

...I don't wanna compete.

I thought you wrote these.

What a nice surprise.

Thought you might be hungry.

As a matter of fact I am, thanks.

Since when do you lock the door?

Since last...

You're painting again?

Delicious honey, thanks.

Can I have a look?

No, you don't have to ask.

When I have something to show you, I'll show you.

You OK?

Yeah, I'm fine.

Why?

So you're painting?

No one in particular.

OK, fine.

What do you want me to do, stand in front of my class...

...for the rest of my life and nag about stuff, like a hypocrite?

I don't have the guts to do anymore,

That's not what we're talking about.

I don't want to lose you again.

And especially not to some 21 year old -...

...undergraduate who looks up to you as a god as poses between fucks.

You and Daphna are my life.

And I love you very much.

...

The last time nearly killed us, Donald.

Right.

Well, where were you today?

What do you mean?

You weren't in class, neither was Gredin.

Any connection between the two?

You know, I'm gonna go...

Wait, wait, just tell me.

Were you with him?

Wait.

Don't go.

I don't want you to go.

Can't let you go.

Can't stop thinking about you.

That painting is the first one I've made in years -...

...and it's because of you.

I've never felt this way before in my life.

Help me overcome my fear.

Big scary cat.

Love you for it.

Donald, what are you doing?

Kissing you.

Falling in love with you.

Don't.

Why?

Just don't.

Come here.

What?

Beauty scares me.

Terrifies me.

Wait, wait.

Who is it?

It's Diana.

Not right now, OK?

Alright, I come back.

It's alright.

Stay.

I'm really sorry -...

...about the way I've been acting lately.

This is just a really hard transition for me -...

...and I...

I've been confused.

But I'm not confused anymore.

Please don't give up on me.

Don't just stand there, Donald. Invite them in.

This is Gredin, he was kinda homeless so I invited him.

I hope you don't mind.

No, not at all. Hi Gredin.

You two know each other?

Yeah, he's in my class.

Oh.

Wow, it feels great in here. Can I do anything?

You can set a plate for Gredin.

Hi, Lily.

Can I ask you something?

Is Gredin your boyfriend?

Is that you?

Yeah. Yes, it is.

Donald painted that a long time ago.

That's me.

Come in.

I'll show you around.

Very good.

Very nice.

Why didn't you tell me you were inviting Lily?

Thought I did.

You didn't.

All set.

Good idea.

Thanks.

Will be good with this one, Lily.

Please.

Will you bring the cranberries for me?

Lily, grab the mineral water, would you?

It's in the fridge.

I'm glad you're here.

What's up, where are you going?

Into the other room.

Where do you think I'm going?

Wait just a second.

Don't.

Let me just look at you.

Why did you bring him?

Because he's my boyfriend.

So, Gredin, why don't you sit over here?

Lily, next to Gredin.

Daphna, you're here beside Lily.

Donald, you're over here next to me.

Do you have a cake for Johnny?

Of course.

I'm finished mum. I'm gonna hide.

Fine honey, you go ahead.

So, Lily tells me you're a photographer.

I used to be. Making a comeback.

And you're a painter?

I'm a sculptor mostly.

An amazing sculptor.

A diversion of life study.

That's not entirely true.

Really, used to be.

Me and Donald agree on a couple of things.

Like your beauty, for example.

I've never seen your work before.

It's good.

It's amazing what you can do with the right subject.

Donald's painting again.

First time in a long while.

I'll get some more wine.

He's really serious about it.

It's a secret.

So, ehm...

...how did you and Donald meet?

I wanted to do a life study class.

I heard about this single, brilliant, good looking -...

...professor -...

...and weazled my way into his class.

And the rest is history.

Bit of a cliche, I know.

Some more?

Thanks.

Angela was just telling us how the two of you met.

For God's sake, let's not bore them with out trivia.

I never actually thought of it as trivia, Donald.

Where's Daphna?

Sound asleep.

She should be in bed, shouldn't she?

Come on sweety, let's go.

I'll take her.

No, I want daddy and Lily to take me.

Well...

Good night.

Let me give you a hand.

Yeah, thank you.

There you go.

Sleep tight, beautiful.

Good night, little girl.

Good night, big girl.

What are you doing?

What does it feel like I'm doing?

Are you fucking crazy?

I'm fucking crazy about you.

What was that?

I cut myself.

Here.

Right here?

Will you fuck me right here?

You don't love me.

Let go of me.

Love me.

Lily, love me.

Get off me.

Don't you dare touch her.

Shit.

Don't you dare touch her.

Calm down.

911, state your emergency.

Mama?

Fuck you, Ivy.

Shit.

Daphna's gonna be fine.

I don't know if you care.

And you?

Am I fine or do I care?

I can't let you go, Lily.

Not after everything we've been through.

It's over, Donald.

Don't fight me, Lily.

Don't shut me out.

I can't let you go, Lily.

I love you too much, I...

Get off.

I'm not gonna hurt you Lily, just let me in.

The police are on their way.

I never meant to hurt you.

You'll have to believe me.

What are you doing?

Go, baby.

Go, go.

I know it's pointless to ask you to forgive me.

OK, well. I just gotta talk.

Then you won't have to deal with me anymore.

My whole life -...

I've felt like a freak.

You know, back home in Michigan -...

I wasn't accepted because I was different -...

...and then I come here -...

I'm not different enough.

So -...

I decided -...

...to become someone else.

Someone -...

...tough and infallible.

Beautiful and sexy.

Fearless.

And it worked.

For the first time in my life I was accepted.

And I became intoxicated by the freedom of it all.

Until it was too late.

It's too late, isn't it?

Well...

For what it's worth...

I love you.

I love you.