Original subtitles

They're about to fuck. - What?

Look up Finnish Comedy Rappers.

The croissant is raw.

The poached egg is supposed to be soft, not a lump.

A drink.

Oops.

How about dessert?

Rachel made a nice chocolate mousse.

Let me think. Should I watch a video where I'm a total clown -

or maybe call our manager. - But he doesn't exist.

Or have dessert made by the Yankee bitch who caused this.

She probably spit in it. Mare, what would you do?

Is it vegan? - I'll ask.

No, wait. I know what I'll do.

I'll draft a press release. Finland's most promising rap group -

broke up because of betrayal. How about that?

Defamation.

The act causes harm or distress to the injured party.

You do know Rachel and I are willing to settle this dispute.

He's a handsome guy.

Just look at him and that jaw line. - Huh?

They'll be fucking soon. - Shut up.

You're afraid of losing him.

He's so fucking important to me. I love him.

I'm just so angry.

Listen, Pietari.

Stenu is not going anywhere.

He's just infatuated. It'll pass.

Bastards forever!

Maarit...

I've loved you for 9 years and 4 months.

I've done nothing about it. Nothing.

Because we agreed: Bastards first.

The band will stay together.

What's the point? 1.9 million people think we're clowns.

Think of it this way: 1.9 million people know who we are.

1.9 million.

Where the hell is my phone?

Hey you!

If you think there's no light Bastards out of sight

But we're the comeback of common sense

The Bic Mac of planetary diet Serving you like this

The Finnish Comedy Rappers

Did you even think of this Before you took it out on us

Maybe something's missing from the picture?

Don't get mad when the Bastards get back

Everything you laugh at is not fun

Wink and link, shout to the wind Someone will hear you

You know who will swallow The bitter tears in the end

That was totally radical.

Thank you.

Some catchup over here! - Can you please keep it down?

Seriously, we're trying to enjoy our dinner. Keep it down.

Just eat your shit and don't cry.

First time in the city, dick? - What do you mean?

Take your bitch the hell out of here.

Well, look at you!

I'll punch you...

What's this? - I wrote a play last night.

That's your lines. A lot of them.

Poljakov won't believe we don't want Karelia back.

Them Russkies don't listen to our military leadership. Parikka!

We will surprise them. We'll deliver the message through drama.

All right... - We've got an ace up our sleeve.

Poljakov is going shit himself.

Ronald fucking Bonanza is on his way here.