Original subtitles

BASED ON THE NOVEL EVERYONE LOVES ME BY QIAO YAO

Gu Xun.

Do you...

have a girlfriend?

I actually have...

always liked you.

Do I

stand a chance?

CHAT WITH STICKY DOUGH TWIST

STICKY DOUGH TWIST

I'M ABOUT TO CONFESS MY FEELINGS TO HIM

If you don't know me well,

we could start as friends, and then...

I don't like you.

Not now

and not ever.

You're just not my type.

Give her the umbrella.

After all that just now, that's not a good idea.

Are you scared?

What did you say? Hand it over.

Gu Xun gave you this.

I don't need it. Thank you.

Hello.

I'm here to report for work.

The Ninth Business Unit, Gu Xun.

I don't know who Yue Qianling is.

I only know you as the camper.

So...

why don't we

add each other on WeChat?

Here.

Do you need anything else?

No.

I don't like you.

Not now

and not ever.

You're just not my type.

Go!

Dough Twist, your gun went off by mistake!

Dough Twist,

who are you aiming at?

Shut up!

What are you doing? Do you want to die too?

Let go of me!

Back off!

I was just tossing a grenade for you.

Why the tears?

You almost blew us all up!

Why are you crying?

What's wrong?

Say something.

What's wrong with me?

I'm heartbroken. That's what!

Heartbroken! Do you get it?

No way. Did you actually profess your love to him?

Aren't you the campus belle?

How could you have failed?

How should I know?

What a jerk!

Well,

cheer up.

Dinner is on me tonight.

I'm heartbroken,

and you're buying others dinner?

Do you have no heart?

Which stupid guy messed with our dear Dough Twist?

-I'll come to Jiangcheng to avenge you. -Well said.

We've been through life and death together.

Who upset you?

I'll finish him tomorrow.

Go ahead!

Go to the Binjiang campus

of Dongning University,

find someone named Gu Xun,

and chop him up for me!

All right, I got it!

Gu...

Gu Xun?

Wait. The name she just said was...

Gu something Xun?

So the guy I'm supposed to kill is...

Gu something Xun?

That can't be right.

-How could it be such a coincidence? -But it seems to be the case.

-It's the same name. -Same surname.

-And the same campus! -And the same campus!

You...

Weren't you

partnering with Gun King?

Who?

Your crush. You told me yourself.

Jiangcheng Gun King 001.

Weren't you partnering with him?

I was at the commencement ceremony this morning.

I lent my account to my cousin.

She, on the other hand,

had a successful confession.

So that wasn't you

this morning?

Then...

Then you were...

Me?

I was professing my love to Gu Xun.

No, wait.

I was being rejected by Gu Xun

in front of the entire campus.

What do you think he's thinking about?

Death.

His crush likes him back.

That's kind of romantic.

It's romantic but deadly.

Yes, deadly.

How could this be?

Why do you look

like you're atoning for something?

I...

I've been shot. It hurts.

Anyway,

I still hope that Gu Xun

finds no sauce when he buys mixed rice,

finds no fork for his noodles,

and finds no water or toilet paper when he goes to the toilet.

-Poor guy. -Poor guy.

Why is there an arrow in this game?

I'm sure there must've been a misunderstanding.

Maybe

he didn't mean it like that, right?

He might not have...

Is that so?

In that case,

I will

puncture his tires,

tear up his diploma, and smash his suitcase

in front of the entire school!

-Poor guy. -Poor guy.

That's weird.

This game doesn't have archers.

If he could do it over,

I'm sure he definitely wouldn't...

He surely...

He...

He definitely...

Buddy, what are you doing?

I'm thinking if I should come clean with her.

If you come clean,

it'll go like this.

Hi. Gu Xun is Campus Hunk, and Campus Hunk is Gu Xun. I am...

This will be the consequence.

I don't want to lie to her.

Approach her with your Campus Hunk identity.

Once she's no longer angry, look for an opportunity.

But if you tell her everything all at once,

both Gu Xun and Campus Hunk will be doomed.

So how do you want to meet your doom?

In a drunken dream.

Take it easy with the drinking.

Tell me.

Have my efforts moved no one but myself?

That's not true.

He clearly doesn't like me.

Yet, I kept throwing myself at him.

No.

You moved me too.

Really?

Stop crying.

Is it because I'm not good enough?

Am I not gentle enough?

How could you think that?

You're great.

You're very gentle.

Going to work every day was tiring enough,

but I had to get up early,

put on makeup,

dress up,

and speak in a high-pitched voice.

Do you know how gross that was?

You shouldn't do that anymore.

Couldn't he have just

rejected me gently?

I don't owe him anything!

What's his problem?

Exactly.

Let's not bother with him anymore.

Don't contact him anymore.

Gu Xun, that jerk.

He has no heart.

Don't be sad.

Yin Xue,

you treat me so well.

I knew you were the best.

See?

Love that requires groveling is worthless.

Being yourself is what matters most.

A hand that was born to hold a bottle

isn't for forming a hand heart.

Let's drink.

Drink.

Excuse me.

Can I add you on WeChat?

Come. Sit.

Buddy, let me tell you.

At your young age,

you shouldn't be learning pickup lines.

You shouldn't date either. It's useless.

I just wanted to add you on WeChat. If it's not okay, just forget it.

I'm not done yet.

At your young age,

you should focus on your career.

-Do you know what that means? -Yes.

What good does dating do?

You'll still get dumped anyway.

But a career?

Your career won't abandon you.

I'm sorry about that.

She's drunk.

I guess I should go.

Where are you going?

Do you want to add me on WeChat?

Sure, here.

We can discuss

the secret of success.

Do you know the first step to success?

Is it...

being real?

Exactly.

You've got potential.

Being real.

Let's drink to that.

-Be real. -Cheers!

-Cheers. -Be real!

-Be real! -Be real!

Can't that Gu Xun be more real?

Being...

I'm so sorry.

Qianling,

you should stop thinking about that jerk.

Maybe it's karma.

I put on a fake persona this one time.

I didn't expect to face retribution so soon.

Don't talk about yourself like that.

If you're feeling down,

remember to turn to us.

Don't keep it all bottled up.

I'm really okay.

It's just a love confession gone wrong.

I'm not that fragile.

It's fine. We all live in the same city anyway.

Once I've rented a place,

come over to hang out.

-Qianling, good morning. -Good morning.

What's with you today? Where's your makeup?

Work has been crazy. I have no time.

Isn't that a bit of an exaggeration?

Does our department

really have that much work to do?

Speaking of which, one of your pieces needs a touch-up.

I've marked it and sent it to your email.

Okay, I'll get right on it.

Wait a second.

You're not my boss.

I've planned it all out.

As long as we work together, we can be Group Leader in three months

and get Jiang Yishi's office in six months.

Becoming a CEO in three years will no longer just be a dream.

I don't want to be that busy.

If I had the time,

I'd rather

experience a few sweet romances.

By the way, I have to tell you something.

I've been chatting with a cute guy online.

Look, isn't he handsome?

BECOME A CEO IN THREE YEARS

Just take a look and tell me.

Never mind.

Your meeting today

is probably going to be another bloodbath.

EXPENSE REIMBURSEMENT FORM

When he comes clean,

"bloodbath" won't even begin to describe it.

Ma'am, this is my reimbursement form.

Could you stamp it for me?

Give me a moment.

Ma'am, it'll be quick. You just have to stamp it.

Kangkang, this one is done.

Ma'am, just stamp it and it'll be done.

Mr. Gu,

why are you here in person?

What do you need? I'll handle it.

I'm here

for the stationery purchase order.

You could have sent someone else for such a trivial thing.

Ma'am, I was here first.

Mr. Gu, please wait in line.

Thank you.

Mr. Gu.

Here's your purchase order.

Yue Qianling.

Mr. Gu, what do you need?

I'd like to talk to you about what happened yesterday.

What about yesterday?

Right. Yesterday, you rejected me in front of everyone.

I've accepted your decision.

From now on, our interaction will be purely professional.

For work-related issues, contact me on DingTalk.

No...

Hello.

Did you forget about the meeting?

Everyone is here.

Stella is here too. Hurry up.

Okay.

This is our progress chart for The Love Broker.

We plan to release and launch the game within a year.

Based on our estimates, we're likely to achieve a profit

of over 150 million yuan in the first month post-launch.

Within the first quarter after launch,

we expect to surpass 300 million yuan in profits.

Excellent.

Your project was just approved,

and there has already a long-term plan in place.

Gu Xun,

could you share the current progress and plans for Hero's Path?

Ever since Hero's Path started,

we've completed our first-phase goals,

including the main project plan and the programming architecture.

In the next three months,

we'll continue to refine the system,

gameplay, and features.

We also aim to produce a demo within a year.

Excuse me. I need to take this call.

Mr. Gu,

The Love Broker

is laying a solid financial foundation for Hero's Path.

We're earning the money

for you to spend.

Mr. Jiang, discussing profits just after your project got approved

might be a bit premature.

After all, you're developing The Love Broker

because the returns from your last project

were average.

Well, your team's execution is no better than ours,

and we're just developing mobile games.

Is triple-A game development too challenging for you?

There's a gap in workload and complexity between our projects,

so it's understandable that your department's progress

matches ours.

Making a pie-in-the-sky plan is easy, but carrying it out is hard.

The six-month profits

of The Love Broker

would take your team...

two or three years to make?

Mr. Jiang,

I'm afraid you guys could never match

what we'll accomplish in two years.

The progress chart is already out.

How do you plan to move things forward?

What's with the silence?

The key animation severely lacks detail,

and the key features don't stand out.

-Am I right? This afternoon... -Why is Mr. Jiang acting so odd today?

-Why is everyone so tense? -Got it?

Yes.

You can go now.

Go.

They're coming out.

Everyone, listen up.

As you all know,

the most important project for our department right now

is The Love Broker,

so I hope we can pull together

and set aside other drawings

that aren't urgent.

But for the last project,

we still have some holiday special outfits to draw.

Is anyone willing to stick with the last project?

Anyone?

Okay, I'll let you all think about it.

Come talk to me anytime if you decide to do it.

I'll do it.

Great.

Are you insane?

Everyone wants to work on The Love Broker.

Why are you choosing the opposite?

Thank you, Ms. Yue, for your dedication.

Make sure to seize this opportunity.

Good luck.

Have you thought this through?

For a job like this,

if it goes south, it's all on you.

Even if you do well, no one will care.

How about this? Let's find a way for you to back out of it.

Principle one of success:

Don't pick and choose tasks,

and don't disdain small tasks.

Back in the day,

the creator of WeChat didn't expect his product to surpass QQ either.

Okay, fine.

You do it.

Buddy, you've been eating those three bean sprouts

for over an hour now.

Isn't that Yue Qianling?

Okay, enough with the book. It's lunchtime.

Nice. We came during off-peak hours.

It's practically empty.

I wonder if they still have the dish I want.

Great. They still have one last serving

of spicy chicken and spicy duck blood soup.

I'll have this, this,

and this.

So that's who you've been thinking about.

What?

Where are you going?

Do you mind if I join you?

Empty trays go over there.

I didn't get any food.

Well, we have plenty of food here, Mr. Gu.

Why don't you join us?

Okay.

I just remembered that there's a file I haven't saved.

I need to go back.

Wait. You haven't even taken a bite.

We have cloud documents, don't we?

Don't worry.

If you leave now,

how awkward would it be

for me to be alone with him, right?

Mr. Gu,

it's not often we see you.

Mr. Gu,

the Ninth Business Unit

is our main gossip topic now.

We've always wanted to get to know you.

Here's a question.

Do you have a girlfriend or something?

I'm not asking for myself. Many girls in our department are curious.

I'm too busy with work to have time for that.

So, do many girls profess their love to you?

Yes.

Mr. Gu, why are you looking at me?

I see.

You're trying to tell me

that girls like me are too ordinary to profess to you, right?

Okay, I got it.

If I said anything wrong,

feel free to correct me anytime.

What has gotten into you today?

Mr. Gu, here. Eat up.

The dishes we picked are quite tasty. Eat more.

How weird.

Why is today's spicy chicken tasteless?

Mr. Gu,

try the spicy duck blood.

It's extra spicy.

-Could you get me a cup of water? -I'll go.

I'll get you a sour prune drink.

-What do you want? -I'll get the same.

Okay.

About yesterday...

I want to explain

what happened yesterday.

It's all in the past. There's no need.

We can put it behind us after I explain.

-I actually... -Su Zheng!

Come over here!

What a coincidence.

Mr. Gu, you're here too.

Mr. Gu,

Su Zheng and I need to discuss our department's work matters.

You wouldn't be interested, would you?

What work?

-What... -I'll let you two talk.

You and him...

I saw everything.

Yue Qianling is usually submissive,

but she actually speaks boldly.

She's much more likable now.

I finally get to see Dough Twist's savageness in real life.

What did you want to talk about?

I forgot.

-Hello. -Is this Yue Qianling?

I'm from the university housing office.

We notified you a week ago to vacate the dormitory,

but we realize you haven't.

Please move out as soon as possible.

We still need to clean up the room.

I'm so sorry. I'll move out as soon as possible.

Make it quick.

I'll leave the task to you then.

I appreciate your hard work.

ANOTHER WIN

Is there anyone here?

I'm busy with work.

Something ridiculous just happened.

What happened?

I ran into that Gu Xun again.

Guess what he did.

ANOTHER WIN

Really?

Is it that Gu Xun you like?

What did he do to you?

He sat across from me at the cafeteria

and even ate my food.

And he chose the same drink as me.

That's so creepy.

I had something I badly wanted to say,

but considering there were so many people around us,

I held it back.

What did you want to say?

You're here too.

How dare you eavesdrop on us.

CAMPUS HUNK HAS MUTED CAMEL

CAMPUS HUNK HAS MUTED WHEAT

I wanted to tell him

that Dolly, the cloned sheep, had six years to live at most.

Young lady,

this apartment was renovated

about seven or eight years ago.

The furniture is a bit old too.

It's surely not as nice

as the unit downstairs.

Am I right?

It's a bit older,

but it's cheaper too, right?

You get what you pay for.

The unit you're looking at is also mine.

I just rented it out last week

on an annual lease.

Let me tell you.

The tenant is quite nice.

You have nothing to worry about.

This unit is cheaper

than the one downstairs, right?

Of course.

But the decor is indeed older.

That's for sure.

I'll take the downstairs unit then.

Are you sure?

Well, I've brought the contract.

Young lady, you've got good taste.

The feng shui of the downstairs unit is particularly good.

It's known to be the unit that brings romance luck

in this apartment complex.

Once you move in,

you'll find yourself out of singlehood soon.

Young lady, are you seeing anyone?

No.

Is there someone you like?

Well...

No, not anymore.

Let me tell you.

Once you move in there,

your love life will bloom.

The guy you like will definitely profess his love to you.

Even if you were the one professing,

he'd surely say yes.

Ma'am, it's okay.

I've already fixed my poor judgment and bad taste.

Maybe I should just take this one.

That "romance luck" unit really isn't for me.

Are you sure?

-Shall we sign the contract then? -Yes.

Okay, let's sign the contract.

It's an annual lease, okay?

Thank you.

Young lady,

you're clever.

You're incredibly sharp.

This apartment really offers

great value for money.

-Here. Cheers. -Cheers.

-How can I help you? -Excuse me.

-I'll have a beer. -Okay.

I thought the Ninth Business Unit would be very busy.

I never expected

you could leave on time.

We are busy,

but we never have to work overtime.

Do you know why?

-Why? -Why?

It's because capable people

don't need to work overtime.

Impressive.

For all of us who joined the company through campus recruitment,

Wang Hai is now...

Call him Mr. Wang.

-This is... -No wonder it's so lively here.

It turns out the elites of class 2018 are here.

-Come. -Isn't this Map?

What brings you here today?

Wang Hai, why is the Ninth Business Unit so mysterious?

What we're doing at the Ninth Business Unit now

is truly awesome.

In comparison, what we used to work on was really lousy.

It was just child's play.

Really?

Mr. Wang,

show us something then.

Yes, amaze us.

No way.

Just let us take a look.

Everyone says the Ninth Business Unit is incredible.

Seeing is believing.

You've got to show us the proof.

-Right, Wang Hai? -That's right.

Exactly.

I can't just show you.

We've all signed non-disclosure agreements.

-Aren't we friends, Mr. Wang? -Don't worry.

Is the Ninth Business Unit

just all talk?

-Exactly. -Is it, Wang Hai?

Map.

You're just like when you were at school.

Today, I'll show you

what the key animation created by our unit looks like.

You can't take photos, okay?

-We won't. -Don't worry.

-We know the rules. -Of course, we won't.

My goodness.

This is incredible.

-I'm truly in awe. -I received a message.

Save the sweet talk. We're all buddies. Let's drink.

You're right, Wang Hai.

Come on.

Let's drink to Mr. Wang!

-Hurry up. Drink. -Come on.

The Ninth Business Unit really is amazing.

Come on. Here's to Wang Hai.

-Cheers. -Cheers.

-Wang Hai. -Goodness, Map.

You're really good at flattering people.

Bottoms up, Wang Hai.

Are you there?

CHAT WITH CAMPUS HUNK

Talk.

CHAT WITH STICKY DOUGH TWIST

I have something

to tell you.

I want to apologize to you

for something.

-Hello. -Hello.

Are you interested in a commercial area shop

five minutes from the metro for 100,000 yuan?

Actually,

I am Gu Xun.

I'm sorry about what I did.

No, thank you.

Apologize for what?

ANOTHER WIN

STICKY DOUGH TWIST

Are you trying to apologize?

I never thought this could happen to you.

This is unheard of.

ANOTHER WIN

CHAT WITH CAMPUS HUNK

I WANT TO APOLOGIZE TO YOU FOR SOMETHING

Sorry. I answered a call and ended up responding to the wrong chat.

What's wrong?

I AM GU XUN. I'M SORRY...

So

you're meeting your handsome online date.

I should probably head back.

It's awkward for me to be here.

Don't go.

I want you to witness my moment of happiness.

Besides, you can

help me evaluate him.

Okay.

He says he's almost here.

Do I look good?

Great. You look stunning.

That's all I needed to hear.

I'm so nervous.

Huang Jie?

You are...

It's me, Tony.

-Tony? -Tony?

I'm the one you've been waiting for.

Show me your hands.

No, thank you.

Take these.

But why are you

so different from your profile picture

and the photos in your Moments?

That's for sure.

Let me tell you.

The person in my WeChat Moments

isn't me.

The photos are from the Internet.

They're hideous.

I just thought

I should wait until we meet.

That's when

you'll get to see

my handsome face.

So, you've been catfishing me.

When I said

you looked great in this photo,

why didn't you tell me the truth?

You women

are so shallow.

You only care about how guys look.

When you see a handsome guy, you throw yourselves at him.

Me? Throw myself at you?

Look at that.

Women don't just care about appearances.

You two have been chatting for so long.

You had many opportunities to tell her, but you said nothing.

It shows what a terrible person you are.

-Me? -You what?

Not only are you a terrible person,

but you're also extremely insecure.

-You... -Me what?

I was talking to Huang Jie.

Why are you butting in?

Huang Jie has manners.

She doesn't want to make a scene.

But I'm different.

I'm telling you.

Regardless of looks,

a relationship without honesty can never last.

This time you lied about your appearance.

Who knows what you'd lie about next time?

How would any girl want to have a relationship with you?

Speak!

Get lost.

Get lost!

You...

What a psycho.

You're the psycho.

Don't cry.

-It's okay. -How could this happen?

Don't be sad. It's okay.

Look at this.

-Look. -Delete him.

Delete him.

How could he do this?

Let's go. Let's leave this unlucky place.

I looked forward to this for a month.

Ignore him. Let's go.

Mr. Gu.

Hurry up.

My purse.

I was so mad that I left my purse at the café.

-I'm going back. -Okay. Go and get it.

I'm sorry. Please wait for the next lift.

-Okay. -I'm sorry.

Please wait for the next lift. Thank you.

Fine.

Mr. Gu,

over the past few days,

you've made multiple attempts to talk to me.

Let's just clear the air then.

I know you want to apologize,

but I'm not that petty.

It's normal to get rejected.

Even though you were rude, it doesn't matter.

But an apology is really unnecessary

because I've already

moved on.

Actually...

I am Campus Hunk.