Original subtitles

[somber orchestral music]

[footsteps crunching] [dog barking]

[door bangs open] MAN: Hey Ma!

Where the hell are ya, eh? [laughs]

Hey Ma!

Jimmie!

Oh, Jimmie, my boy.

Whoo! [laughing]

Jimmie, be careful.

Will you look at her, she's still got

-an eye for the good lookers. -Oh, Jimmie!

Ma, you're still the only woman I'm gonna marry.

That's what I always used to tell her, Billy.

[laughs]

Hey, ah ha ha ha ha! [laughs]

Oh, my God, Jimmie. [laughs]

Jimmie!

[Jimmie shouts]

How's it goin' there, meat?

-Where you been? -Put her there, huh?

Billy boy, I want you to meet the finest folks

in this here damn town, my mom and dad.

This here's my mate, Billy.

He didn't have no place to go on his leave

so I brought him home with me.

MARY: Well, I'm pleased to meet ya, I'm sure.

JIM: How are ya, son, how are ya?

You know what, Dad, the boof didn't wanna come.

So I says, listen here, any pal of mine

is always welcome in my folks' home, huh?

That's right, I've always told him that, Bill.

MARY: Yes, any friend of Jimmie's

is always welcome here. Come in, Billy.

And why don't we all come in?

What the devil are we doing standing out here for?

[Jimmie laughs]

JIMMIE: Well, I'll be gone to hell.

Did you guys see who's here?

Come over here, your brother wants to see ya.

She's all grown up!

That's a kid sister, Billy.

I told you about her, didn't I?

Yeah, sure.

Well, come on over here and let me see ya.

Hi Jimmie. [giggles]

Well, hi yourself.

Now come on and give your brother a big hug, huh?

[laughs]

Cat's got her tongue. She's shy, that one.

Let me see ya.

Come on, say hello to my mate, Billy.

Hello.

How ya doin', kid?

Kid? Hell, she ain't no kid anymore, she's even

got a couple of plums growing underneath there.

[everyone laughs]

Jimmie.

Oh, now Ma, she knows I was only kiddin' her.

Hey?

I think I got somethin' for you, dear.

Me?

Well, I don't know any other Jeannies around here.

Sure enough, that's what it says.

To Jeannie.

Gee, what is it?

Well, open it up and see.

Mom, I smell somethin' good cookin'.

Billy boy, you just sit yourself down

and make yourself at home.

This is gonna be your home for a couple of days

and you act like it, see?

You do just like he says, Billy.

Hey, you make yourself right at home.

[Jimmie laughs] I'm splittin', ya know.

Where's the head?

Oh! [laughs]

Well, that way, you see those stairs?

Straight up, the first door on your right,

and she's there in your face.

You don't fall in, eh?

I'm takin' these things up to the room, huh?

I'll give you a hand there, a minute.

No, no, no, you sit down, take the weight off your feet.

You must be weary after that long ride.

Hungry too, I'll bet.

Starvin', Mom, starvin'.

Well, it's only gonna take me a minute

to put on the table.

[laughs]

Come on now, mate, let me give

-ya a hand there. -No, I'm all right,

I'm all right, I'll manage.

Now, don't talk back to me,

I'm gonna have to take you over my knee. [laughs]

I believe ya could, too.

Ya get bigger every time I see ya.

Besides, ya don't think I was gonna trust ya

all alone with this, do ya, huh? [laughs]

We'll have us a fast one before supper, eh?

[laughing]

[liquid splashing]

Hey, Billy boy!

That's a hell of a waste of good beer.

Hey, don't shake it more than twice

or you're playin' with it. [laughs]

You're still the same old kidder, eh?

You and Billy can have your old room.

Jeannie can sleep downstairs.

Okay, Dad.

[Jimmie laughing]

[toilet flushes]

So the prostitute says,

"Yeah but you'll have to sleep with my daughter, see."

The salesman says, "Yeah, that'll be all right."

So, sure enough, that night he goes up the stairs,

goes in the door...

Ya like it?

Pretty nice, huh?

Yeah.

Wait 'til I show Dolly this.

Who?

Dolly, she's my best friend.

She's got lots of nice things like this.

You know, uh, if ya like I can send ya

a couple more things like that.

Gee, yeah!

Boy'll that brown her off. [chuckles]

Huh?

JEANNIE: Dolly, she's just like that, that's all.

Doesn't like anybody havin' somethin' she hasn't got.

I got one other brooch that Mom gave me,

but you should see all the stuff she's got.

Earrings, even a pearl necklace.

It ain't real, but it sure looks pretty nice.

I tell ya what.

Why don't ya bring her around, hm?

I'd like to meet her.

JEANNIE: You will, she's gonna call on me later.

She'll probably start puttin' on the dog for Jimmie.

She saw an old picture of him once

and thinks he's real cute.

I got it in my wallet, you wanna see it?

[sighs] Yeah, sure.

[Jimmie and Jim laughing]

I don't have very many.

You should see all she's got.

What are you doin' later?

Um, just fool around, I guess.

Yeah?

Well, um, maybe we can do somethin', huh?

What? [giggles]

Well, I don't know.

Ain't ya got any shows around here?

Or, uh, scoff a few beer, maybe?

In a beer parlor?

BILLY: Well, it don't matter to me, beer's beer.

My dad'd crown me.

Hell, good beer never hurt nobody.

He don't like me goin' out nowhere.

[chuckling]

Oh, you look pretty grown up to me.

You know, um, you shouldn't wear

that thing there, come here.

I'll show ya where to wear it, okay?

There we go, right there.

There, that's where you should wear it, hmm?

Let me see.

Wear that mirror out

the way you're always in front of it.

Could use a little help, ya know.

Oh, didn't mean to interrupt ya, Mr. Billy.

Oh, we were just talkin'.

Come on then, Jeannie, give me a hand, dear.

Would you mind callin' Jimmie and his dad, then?

I don't want it to get cold.

I expect you'll find them in one of the bedrooms upstairs.

What do ya think this is, a can opener?

Come on, then.

[laughing]

A can opener! [laughs]

[Jim coughs and laughs]

You know, the Mrs. said to tell ya supper was ready.

The hell with guarding them Krauts tonight.

We'll all go down to the legion.

We'll have a night.

We'll have us a night. [laughs]

I'll say. We'll have a good time, Dad.

Hey, Billy boy.

Show the old bear those pictures you got there.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

Hey, wait 'til ya see these, Dad, huh?

There ya go, Pop.

What?

Oh.

[Billy clicks tongue] [Jimmie laughs]

[men laughing]

JIM: Well, that's just the trouble.

They're too easy on him.

They think we should treat them

like bloody royalty, they do.

Hurry up, Doog!

-No, so far as I'm concerned -JEANNIE: Relax, eh?

-a prisoner of war -Some people!

has got no bloody privileges.

JIM: They're nothin' but a lot

of yellow bastards that give up.

Old Dad's one of the guards at the POW camp

cross town, Billy.

Oh.

JIM: Aye.

Over 4,000 men we got in that camp.

4,000 men.

[chuckles] Eh?

Mind ya it's not like bein' in the regular service.

Don't I wish I was young enough.

Still, somebody's got to look after 'em.

And I do my job well, and though I do say it myself.

Yeah, it don't make much sense to me, ya know.

Lookin' after a bunch of bastards

you're supposed to kill.

JIM: My very sentiment. [chuckles]

They're clever little buggers, ya know.

Hey.

I'm going to show you something

I'll wager you've never seen before.

[Jimmie and Billy laugh]

Week's pay say she's handled more meat

than a barracks butcher, eh, buddy?

[laughing]

JIM: Aye, there it is.

[men laughing]

Here.

What do you think of that?

Well, I'll be gone to hell.

How 'bout that, eh Billy?

Geez, now how'd that ship get in there?

That's real sharp, Pop.

Mind ya, it's very complicated

the way they do this, ya know.

They've got these pieces of string--

Well, I'm on my way.

I hope that the supper was good, Billy.

Oh, just fine, just fine.

Well, it wasn't much, I'm afraid,

but it's so hard to get things these days

with the war on and all.

Where ya goin', Ma?

Ain't you gonna come over to the legion with us?

No, no, I've got to go out for a few hours.

But I'll see ya when you get home, son.

Okay, kid.

Jeannie, you clear up for me now, hear?

JEANNIE: Yeah, yeah.

And don't you be stayin' out late.

Well, bye-bye again.

Take care, kid.

Where's she goin' anyway, Dad?

Oh, she's got to help out someone, ya know.

[dog barking]

Jesus Christ, didn't nobody feed my blasted dog here?

What, you got a dog now?

Aye, ya see I figured it was safer for your mother

with me at work so much.

Besides, we've had one or two escapes

from yon prison camp.

Ah, ah.

It's called Rex.

Rex. [laughs] Rex.

Aye, that's the trouble,

nobody feeds the little bugger.

Well, ya gotta feed him, Dad.

Ya gotta feed him, I'll tell ya that much.

[dog barking]

It's time to feed Rexie.

I haven't had him very long.

He still needs a little trainin' up, ya know.

Well, just as long as he knows who's the master

that's the main thing, huh, Dad?

Ah, he'll soon learn.

Hey, Rexie. Rexie, hey.

Hey, come here.

Come here boy, come on.

[men laughing]

Rex, your dinner.

[Rex whines]

Look at the little bugger. [laughs]

Make him do a trick, Dad.

[Rex barks] [Jim mumbles]

Hey, hey, hey.

Gah!

[Jim laughs] [Rex barks]

How's it goin'?

Okay, I guess.

Uh, yeah, um, Jeannie told me

you'd be comin' around tonight.

I'm Billy.

-Hi. -Hi.

Jesus, Dougal, how much longer ya gonna be?

[footsteps clomping on stairs]

Come on, quick.

Hey, um, where youse goin'?

I don't know.

Could be anywhere.

Yeah, well, maybe we can meet ya later, huh?

Yeah, maybe, see ya.

Yeah, well, don't forget now, huh?

[Rex barking]

Go ahead, sick him, sick him!

[slow accordion band music]

You know, I think that Billy likes me.

Eh, get you.

Take a look at yourself in the mirror sometime.

Yeah?

Well, if you think you're so smart

he said he's gonna send me some more things

like Jimmie brought.

What things?

Come on, eh, what things?

Hey, let me wear it for a while, eh?

No, I just got it.

It's glass anyway.

It is not, it's rhinestones.

Well, it's glass.

Boy, you just can't stand anybody

havin' somethin' better than you.

Oh, listen, who cares about your old brooch anyway?

Come on.

And don't go doin' nothin' stupid tonight

like tellin' some guy you're only 16.

[slow accordion band music]

[crowd applauds]

[upbeat accordion band music]

Yes sir, I've known Jimmie,

well me and his father's been friends

since I can remember, so I've known Jimmie

since he was a wee laddie, a bairn.

Is that not right, Jimmie?

Aw, come on Sandy, it musta been

before that, huh? [laughs]

This boy's a kidder, always been a kidder, yes sir.

Come on now, Sandy, drink up

or I'm gonna get ahead of ya, now.

-Ah, now. -Yeah, come on, Pop.

Come on now, I've been here all day.

There's no way you'll get ahead of me, no way.

Nobody can drink Sandy under the table.

And ain't you the proud one.

Oh, God almighty.

Well, where's the fun of sittin' drinkin' all the time?

Hey, Sandy, I think the little lady wants a dance, huh?

How 'bout me, ma'am?

How 'bout it?

Aye, why not?

Come on, lad.

[laughs] SANDY: There we go!

[out of tune piano music]

Aye, he's a good lad. [laughs]

Yeah, but he ain't no freakin' dancer.

Hey, you should see my old man dance, eh Fordy?

[laughing]

[men chattering]

Hey, mister.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure.

Uh, now don't tell me, one date

at the post office here with Dad, right?

[men laugh]

MAN: Aye, that's right.

Worked together with your dad for years.

That's one thing, I never forget a face.

Names, that's a different story, though.

Yeah, that's one thing I'll say for the boy,

he never forgets a face.

[woman muttering]

What are you doing here?

Never forget a good screw either.

[laughing]

Hey, Jimmie, Jimmie.

You been over yet?

That's a different story, that, yeah.

He's asked for active duty a hundred times now.

They won't send him.

It's like that prick of a sarge tells me,

he says, "Dougal," he says, "You're the only guy

around this camp who knows where the hell anything is."

-Yeah. -Aye.

He's head of the stores department

down at the cavalries.

Am I right, Billy?

Go on, tell 'em.

Yeah, yeah, Jimmie's the boy, ya know.

Anything ya want, a new duffle bag,

or a stinkin' pair of shoelaces.

He's the boy to do it for you.

You tell 'em, soldier.

I guess that's what I get for doin' my job so well, eh?

Hey, now listen, listen.

Every job counts.

They'll give you a chance in time, eh?

-Aye they will. -Wait a minute,

wait a minute, wait a minute.

That's not what you were gettin' at, was it?

Don't ya think it's important the things I do, eh?

The crap that I gotta put up with?

Come on now, Jimmie,

Stuart didn't mean anything like that.

Wait a minute, wait a minute, let him speak for himself.

Okay, buddy boy, if you're so smart,

then you tell me something.

Supposin' some guy wants a rifle

and I don't give it to him, what happens then, huh?

What happens to him?

Well, I don't know.

Well, I'll tell ya what happens to him, he's S.O.L.

That's shit out of luck.

Am I right, Billy? You're goddamn right I'm right.

-Huh? -Geez, that's a good one.

The boy's got a head on his shoulders.

What's your name, honey?

I'm Billy.

That's a nice name.

My name's Mrs. Smith, but my friends call me Hattie.

This is my old man Barney.

I bet you can't guess what he does for a living.

Yeah, probably nothin'.

Who asked you?

Aw, piss off.

Come on, come on, you two.

What are you doing here anyway?

Just tryin' to be friendly.

Ah, horseshit.

Now get your arse outta here

and take your old lady with ya, huh?

-We don't need no pikers -Now hang on!

-around here. -We got a right.

Get out!

[group shouting]

Get out! Go!

Ah, sure they'll always fun ya.

I don't why the holer let them in here.

This is supposed to be a club for servicemen only.

Right.

I think they're a good laugh. [laughs]

That one there.

Did you hear what he called me? He called me a piker.

[upbeat piano music]

I told you to get out of here.

-Did you say that? -Who the hell are you?

He didn't say nothin'.

You shut up. I ain't talkin' to you.

Now, come on, come on. I don't want any trouble.

He said it, Jock, I was right here.

A piker he called me.

-Get out. -I got money, see?

See? Yes sir!

Take your money and get out of here.

-Okay, okay. -Nobody can call Barney

-a piker. -I'm tellin' ya--

You better watch who you're callin' names, old man.

Listen, you want me to turn the boy on you? [chuckles]

Come on, Jimmie.

Okay, then.

Come on outside, then.

[men and women shouting]

Come on!

You're chicken livered!

[thumping accordion band music]

[girls giggling]

♪ Will you love me ♪

♪ When I'm old and gray ♪

♪ When this heart of mine ♪

♪ Grows tired and weary ♪

♪ Will you love me as you do today ♪

♪ When our children all grow up and leave us ♪

♪ To have sweet families of their own ♪

♪ Will you still be happy with me, darlin' ♪

♪ Will you still be happy in our home ♪

Say, uh, okay we sit here?

It's a free country.

Yeah, free country.

[short soldier laughs]

Charlie? [laughs]

-Yup. -Yup.

I don't think the girls like us.

[laughing]

I wonder how come?

[laughing] Yup, yup.

I'll give ya three guesses and the first two don't count.

You, you dirty rat, you.

[laughing]

Oh brother.

Hey, that's great.

Come on, do the ones from the radio, Ralph.

Holy smokes, hey there.

Call the police.

[laughing]

Rochester, get the Maxwell.

[laughing]

TALL SOLDIER: Jack Benny!

[car engine humming]

I said it.

You got old Jimmie's word for it.

And if I say it, it's the God's truth.

Isn't that right, Billy?

-Huh? -Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Sure, that son of a bitch.

Jimmie, forget it, will ya?

I've always said it and I'll say it again,

there's not anything worth gettin' yourself

into a fight over.

Then why don't ya shut your goddamn mouth, then, huh?

Come on, Jimmie.

This is your friend, Sandy.

I did not mean any harm by it.

Aye, son, that's no way to talk.

Yeah, well, the old bugger's been

goin' on about it all goddamn night.

Wanna fight with me, Sandy, huh?

-Hey, Jim. -Is that it, eh?

-Jimmie. -Huh?

[men shouting]

Come on you...

Don't know what to do, boy?

Don't know what to do?

All right!

Get him up, Billy.

I'm okay.

I'm okay.

Will ya listen to me?

Listen, Dad, you wanna know somethin'?

Wanna know why I didn't kick the crap outta that guy?

'Cause that's all it would've meant.

It would've been the end right there.

I would've come all the way home just to see you and mom

and they would've threw me in the jug.

Is that what ya wanted, Dad?

I know, I know, I know. Come on, come on, son.

Look, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

JIM: Go on, Billy.

Get the lad up to bed, Billy?

Hey Sandy.

Sandy, you're not goin',

you're not goin' are ya?

Listen, I know the laddie's had too much to drink and,

he'd never behave like this

if he was sober, I guarantee that.

I know, I know.

Look here, Jim.

You and I have always been friends, all right?

Aye.

Friends.

Aye, friends.

Best friend I ever had.

Aye, aye.

Ah, goodbye, Sandy.

[car engine starts]

Oh, Billy.

Gee, I never seen the lad behave like that before.

Now listen, you're his friend.

Have ya ever seen him behave like that before?

Aw, he's a good head, Jimmie, a good head.

Sure.

Well, I ought to know, I'm the lad's father.

No, I figure I've had enough, eh.

I better go and see if he's all right.

Yeah, okay. Goodnight, Pop.

And, uh, don't worry about Jimmie, huh?

He's 100%.

Yeah, 100%.

[bottle cap pops]

[girls giggling]

[laughing]

DOLLY: You shoulda seen the two goons

that followed us home, eh, Doog?

Yeah.

Have ya ever seen Mutt and Jeff in person?

[girls laugh]

Just a couple of guys you met?

DOLLY: Met?

We did everything we could not to meet 'em.

They just couldn't leave us alone.

Everywhere we went they were sure to go,

wagging their tails behind them.

[girls giggle]

And her!

"Pleased to meet you."

Honestly, Doog.

Well, they paid for our coffee and stuff, didn't they?

Besides I can't be like you.

You should see her, Billy! She tells the guy that...

[laughs] Well, I can't say, but boy.

Oh come on, what'd she say, hmm?

Go ahead, tell him.

Oh no, not me.

What did I tell ya about startin' things

ya can't finish, eh?

[Jeannie laughs]

Anyways, I told him to...

Well, come on, whatcha say?

You know, you shouldn't be so curious.

It killed the cat.

You know what I mean?

[girls giggle]

What's so funny about that?

Okay, then.

What's something

you've got

that I haven't got?

[chuckles] Well now, uh, let me see.

That's an open question, isn't it?

Bad breath.

[Jeannie giggles]

Very funny.

Oh, come on, don't be such a sore head.

It's just a joke you play on guys.

You want a beer?

Beer, yuck!

How 'bout you, hmm?

Gee, I...

I can't.

I used to know a guy who could take down

a whole bottle without stoppin'.

Shit.

That's easy.

Watch this.

[gulping] [Jeannie giggling]

He was an idiot, too.

[giggling]

Boy, I bet if I hit you in the gut right now,

bam, beer all over the place.

[chuckles]

Try.

Are you kidding?

Come on!

[fist thuds] [Billy grunts]

There see, can't hurt me.

Jesus, I hurt my knuckle on one of those buttons.

Ah, hurt yourself instead, huh?

Eh, you'll be all right.

I thought I'd put some cold water on it.

Come on, Doog.

[chuckling]

[girls whispering]

DOLLY: Go on, I said!

She wants you to go in there.

[blows smoke]

[Dolly giggling]

I'm still here, you know, Dolly.

And I'm stayin' down here tonight, too, so...

[Dolly giggling]

[Billy breathes heavily]

[both groaning]

Okay, okay, sonny, hands above the belt, eh!

What's wrong, huh? [slap]

[Billy grunting] [Dolly sighs]

I said quit it!

Come on, you know you're gonna come across.

You been waitin' for it all day.

[grunts]

I'm gettin' outta here, you're nuts.

You little cock teaser!

Ah, get you.

You touch me, you son of a bitch,

and I'll yell so loud this whole house

will be awake in one second flat.

[Billy groans and breathes heavily]

Well, nothin' happened in there, ya know.

We were just kiddin' around a bit.

You, uh, you sleepin' down here?

Yeah.

You and Jimmie are sleepin' in my room.

Oh, yeah, I guess it's gettin' kinda late, huh?

Well, I guess everybody's asleep upstairs, huh?

Guess so.

Hey, don't tell 'em what time I came home, eh?

Oh, nah, nah.

You know that, uh, Dolly isn't very much, ya know.

Hell, you're prettier than she is, even.

Are you kidding?

All the fellas go after her.

Eh.

You know, you got beautiful long blonde hair, hmm?

All ya have to do is fix it up a bit

the way the grownups do, hmm?

You know, curl it up the way women do?

[chuckles]

Yeah, well, um, you go to bed, huh?

And I'll turn out the lights on the way up, okay?

Goodnight, then, huh?

'Night, Billy.

[light switch clicks]

Yeah, goodnight.

You don't want me to go up there, do ya?

What do you mean?

You know what I mean.

What are-- what are you doing?

Now, come on, don't act dumb, hmm?

[whimpering]

No, please don't do that.

[Jeannie whimpers] [Billy grunts]

Now come on, you stupid bitch!

[breathes heavily]

[Jeannie whimpers and cries]

[Billy groans]

[Billy grunts and breathes heavily]

[Jeannie cries]

[breathing heavily]

[Jimmie vomiting]

[birds chirping]

[suspenseful orchestral music]

[door clicks]

[liquid splashing]

[toilet flushes]

[door clicks]

Hey. [Jimmie grunts]

Come on, ya bastard, wake up.

What's the matter? Huh, what's the matter?

Aw, shit!

Somebody puked all over my bed!

Look, listen Jimmie, we gotta go.

JIMMIE: Aw, Christ, it's all over me.

Shh, for Christ sakes, you wanna wake everybody up?

We gotta go.

I just can't up and leave the old man

and old lady like that, ya know?

We just got here yesterday.

Okay, suit yourself.

Ya wanna hang around the house with your folks?

Well, I'm pissin' off, man.

JIMMIE: All right, all right, hang on for a minute, will ya?

The goddamn sun ain't even up yet.

[footsteps click on the stairs]

Now look, I know you're not asleep.

Now you just better keep your mouth shut, ya hear?

I mean, if you tell anybody, I'll know and I'll be back.

Okay?

[footsteps thud on the stairs]

This damn uniform's gonna stink for a week from this crud.

Come on, keep quiet, let's go.

Where in the Christ are we gonna get a bus

-this time of the morning? -Come on!

[somber orchestral music]

[rain patters]

One thing, gentlemen, you forgot to write down here

that is that it was a pleasure, gentlemen.

Always was.

Well, how do I look?

MARY: Aw, it's very becomin', Jim.

Must've shrunk the blazer a bit at the cleaners,

it's a tight fit.

Bloody thing's always catchin' lint, too.

MARY: Did ya prepare a thank you speech?

I said it before, I'll not be makin' any fancy speeches.

I'll say thank you and that's it.

Oh, Jim, ya must say somethin'.

Now, look here, did I ask 'em to give me any blinkin' award?

Did I now?

Well, I hope not.

It wouldn't be me if I said anything else.

My boys know me as a man of simple tastes.

Want to express themself the same way

[knocking on the door]

Well, it seems a shame--

No, that's it.

That's the way it's gonna be.

MARY: Sarah, come in, come in, you're soaked.

Oh my goodness, where've you gotten all these things?

SARAH: I made three dozen cookies this afternoon

and the rest is mostly sandwiches

for the dart tournament.

[cash register dings]

Hey, did ya hear about that job?

Nah.

I don't like addin' up money and stuff.

Just don't like doin' it, that's all.

Yeah, I know.

My dad says if I don't get a job soon he's kickin' me out.

Yuk, yuk, yuk.

Besides, he hasn't got any room to talk.

Every time I see the old fart

he's just sittin' there with a gut full of beer.

Hey.

You should get a job here.

Look at all the wiz things you could pinch.

But Jeannie wouldn't do that.

She's chicken.

I am not.

[cash register dings]

[purse clasp clicks]

Well, I don't like any of these things.

I'm gonna get somethin' else.

[cash register dings]

Dougal, you wait up or else!

[baby crying]

Oh boy, talk about an ignoramus.

I mean, why didn't ya just stand there

and yell it to everybody?

Did everybody see me?

No.

Boy, what a jerk!

Well, what'd you get?

Nothin'.

Nothin'?

Aw, brother, you're a mental case, ya really are.

Come on.

Ya gotta smarten up, Dougal.

You're scared of your own shadow.

No wonder no one'll give ya a job.

I dunno.

Maybe I'll get ya on at the cannery with me in the spring.

Ya think ya could?

I don't know, maybe.

Yuck!

[sighs] I gotta get some money somewhere

if I'm goin' to the States to see my sister.

Come on, eh? How you gonna move down there?

Listen, my brother-in-law told me

to come and see 'em any time.

And is he ever cute, too.

And he's got a real terrific job

in one of the defense plants.

He treats me real swell, which bugs my sister.

Is he the one...

Father, uncle, cousin, kid.

You shouldn't go there, then, Dolly.

Oh, geez, Dougal, when are you gonna learn?

All guys want that.

Ya just gotta decide who you're givin' and who you're not.

Anyways, he gave me 10 bucks not to tell my sister.

Ya know, that's your trouble, Dougal.

Ya never try nothin'.

After the first time, pfft.

But you'll never know 'cause you're gutless.

I am not.

Oh, yes you are.

You got a yellow streak right down the middle of your back.

Well, if you think you're so smart,

I could tell you somethin', too.

What?

What, what, what?

Dougal.

Okay, Dougal, you asked for it.

[Jeannie crying]

Okay, are you gonna tell me?

[hocks a loogie]

How'd ya like a nice big juicy one?

Well, you're such a slut.

What?

[slap]

Okay, are ya gonna tell me or do you want more?

I've already done it if you think you're so smart.

With who?

JEANNIE: [crying] None of your business.

Dougal!

With who, I said?

[crying] Last summer, with Billy who came with my brother!

Let go!

That creep?

He is not a creep!

He liked me, so I let him.

So there!

He tried to get me first, ya know!

[dog barking]

[crying]

[suspenseful orchestral music]

There's a fella sitting out there with you

whom we all think a great deal of.

As on many previous occasions,

he's put a lot of hard work and time

to ensure the success of tonight's proceedings.

We here at the 54th would like to show him

our appreciation with a wee presentation.

Some of you visitors won't know him,

although it wouldn't surprise me if you've heard of him.

In any event, after tonight, I can assure you

you won't forget him, 'cause he's a top notch bowler

and a triple threat at darts, our own Jim Dougal.

Come up here, Jim.

[crowd cheers and applauds]

What have ya got to say for yourself, Jim Dougal?

[men laugh]

That'll be enough from you, Tommy Evans.

I want to thank, uh, all you gentlemen and ladies.

[stammering]It's always nice to see our women folk here.

This here is a real nice plaque that ya give me

and I intend to hang it somewhere in my house

where youse can all see it.

Well, where else would ya hang it, Jim?

[crowd laughs]

Aye, where else would ya hang it?

It says...

It says, "To Jim, a jolly good fellow

"for his devotion and untiring efforts

from all at the 54th."

I think, uh, Mr. Campbell

omitted to mention something here, though.

He, uh-- he omitted to add that, uh,

that it was a pleasure, gentlemen,

always has been and always will be.

Thank you, thank you.

[crowd cheers and applauds]

♪ For he's a jolly good fellow for he's a jolly good fellow ♪

♪ For he's a jolly good fellow ♪

♪ Which nobody can deny ♪

♪ Which nobody can deny ♪

♪ Which nobody can deny ♪

♪ For he's a jolly good fellow ♪

♪ For he's a jolly good fellow ♪

♪ For he's a jolly good fellow ♪

♪ Which nobody can deny ♪

[crowd cheers and applauds]

[Jim and Sandy singing drunkenly]

[Jim and Sandy laughing]

[singing "I've Got Sixpence"]

♪ I've got no pence ♪

♪ Jolly, jolly no pence ♪

♪ I've got no pence ♪

♪ To last me all my life ♪

♪ I got no pence to lend ♪

♪ I have no pence to spend ♪

♪ And no pence to take home to my wife ♪

♪ Poor wife ♪

[laughing]

Fools, that's what ya are.

I was pretty sure we'd be arrested.

I need more than a couple of police

to take care of infantry men like us, eh?

Am I right, Sandy?

That's for sure, I'll tell ya.

You shout like that, Sandy.

Well, I'm in there for a month.

Can't sing about when he's happy.

What is he?

Lucky, that's what, or nothin'.

You're disgustin'.

Aye, and you show me anyone who says different

and I'll show you a son of a bitch liar.

Is there any one of them police

as could do their job like Sandy and me does?

It's enough for them to keep their eye

on just one prisoner.

Sandy and me's been trained to guard

a whole camp with thousands in it.

Every one of them a hundred times more dangerous

than someone who's broke into,

broke into a shop or something.

Aye, aye, aye, and people.

People should be more worried.

Tonight they won the whole of the last war

and now they're gonna make short work of this one.

[laughs] Aye.

There she is.

By golly, if she doesn't get prettier every time I see her.

Would ya not have a kiss for old Sandy, lassie?

Sandy behave yourself.

I guess I'm not the handsome bear I used to be,

but if I was a few years younger

I could give some lad a run for his money.

Hey, Jim? [laughs]

Aye, ya could, Sandy.

Aye, ya could.

Mother, have ya got a couple of ales

in the fridge for me and Sandy.

Oh, now Jim, I don't think you should be havin' any more.

Have some tea instead, why not?

You know, it's true, Jeannie.

I was a real teller in France.

Old Sandy here, if you'll believe it.

Were you?

Aye.

Old Sad Eyes Sandy they used to call me,

'cause that's what the women used to like was my sad eyes.

[laughs] Aye.

♪ I dream of Jeannie with the light brown hair ♪

♪ Da da da die die die ♪

[chuckles]

Ya don't mind old Sandy singin' a wee bit, do ya?

I don't care.

Come on, don't be makin' a fool of yourself.

That's why I'm, and I know it, a fool that I never married

and had a family of my own, a little girl.

Oh, good grief.

Do ya not remember when you was a wee one, lassie,

and you used to sit on my lap and curl up to old Sandy, eh?

You were always givin' me kisses then.

Just a wee one, eh?

Oh, who the hell are ya pushin'?

Keep your bloody hands to yourself.

The ship will not run dry tonight, eh Sandy?

Oh, glory be,

let me give you a hand, man. [laughs]

You're not gonna be drinkin' more are ya?

Oh, please Jim, I wish ya wouldn't.

Since when can't a man have a few quiet drinks

with a friend in his own house?

Aw, Jim, don't get showy like that in front of me.

Jeannie here, just a young lassie.

You'll have regrets tomorrow.

Hello, boy!

Let's go down in the cellar

where we won't disturb these [mumbles] folk.

[Sandy laughs]

Hey, you're a lucky man, Jimmie Dougal.

You're own house, a fine wife,

and a lovely, beautiful daughter.

[Rex barks]

Aye, and a dog, too. [laughs]

[grunts disgustedly] Always ends up

with too much drinkin'.

Oh, I like a pint or two myself,

now and then, you know, but this?

Oh, it's men's ways, Sarah.

Sit yourself down.

I just made us a pot of tea, we can have

a nice chat of our own without them.

Jeannie, will you put out some cups, love?

I have scads of things to tell ya, Sarah.

You'll not guess who's gettin' married.

Joe and Molly's girl.

That wee bit of a thing, she's no more than 19.

Aye, they seem to be growing up a lot faster these days.

I guess it's the war's got to do with it.

[giggles] They sure are funny when they drink.

Especially Sandy and everything he said.

Listen to him.

Aye, they never can seem to hold their tongues

once they got the drink in 'em.

You shouldn't pay him too much

attention when he gets like that.

See, old men, they like flatterin' young girls

with a lot of sweet talk, but it don't mean nothin' to 'em.

Well, here we are.

Oh, you shoulda seen it all, Jeannie.

It was so nice.

You know, I daresay I was attached

and near came to tears two or three times.

All the clappin' and the cheers.

Well, I knew your dad was liked,

but I never knew that much.

Did they give anything away?

MARY: Uh-huh, Elsie won the door prize.

Oh, it was a nice lamp, too.

Oh my, that feels good.

You know, there's nothing like a wee cup

of tea when ya need relaxation.

I thought my poor old legs was gonna give out on me tonight.

I'm a bit weary myself, Mary.

MARY: It's the veins.

You know, I should go to the doctor, but...

Eh, he'd only want me to go in the hospital

and it costs so much money.

[Jim and Sandy laughing loudly downstairs]

[Rex barking] It's not right, ya know.

Oh, Sarah, let them be.

I guess they got good cause for celebratin' tonight.

My Harry were alive, he wouldn't be down there.

He was a gentleman, Mary.

That's what he was, a gentleman, God bless him.

MARY: Aye, he was a fine man.

You know, I don't know what I'd have done

if I'd lost Jim in the war.

It's been hard for you livin' alone

all these years, eh Sarah?

It wasn't so bad when my Betty was with me,

but she's got a family of her own now.

Aye, there've been times when I've been that lonely.

Well, a body has to go on and manage best they can, though.

Here, let me fill ya up again, Sarah.

Oh, no thank ya, Mary.

I must be on me way if I'm going to catch that last bus.

But you're not goin' on the bus, are ya?

Get Sandy to drive ya.

Oh, he won't be in any condition for drivin' a car.

Besides, once he starts singin' and drinkin'

he's settled in for the night.

No, I don't feel like waitin' around for hours.

I'm gonna get me purse and coat.

Sarah, it's a bitter night.

If you won't call him, I will.

Sandy, Sarah's leavin' now.

[Jim and Sandy singing drunkenly]

Take yourself another sweater, then.

Jeannie.

Oh, Mary, I'm fine, don't be fussin'.

No, it's damp out tonight.

You just slip it on, now.

And don't you be tellin' me.

I ride them buses enough to know the heat is no good in them.

It's all right if you get a seat away from the door.

Bye-bye, Jeannie, take care of yourself.

[crickets chirping]

Well, I'll be callin' ya, Sarah.

Will ya be goin' to the church for bingo on Wednesday?

Aye, I will.

Aye, well, bye-bye, Mary.

Goodnight, then.

Aye, it's turned even colder.

I do hope she'll not have long to wait.

Why does Mrs. McCarver walk like that?

She had a bad fall when she was younger.

Husband was very drunk one night and he beat her up.

He doesn't remember it, though.

But those aren't things for your ears, young lady.

You know, you're not much of a help to your old mother.

Turn out the parlor lights now, and get yourself to bed.

[Jim and Sandy laughing and chattering downstairs]

Where did these come from?

Jeannie, did you put these there?

Why were you looking at yourself like that?

You won't tell Dad?

Tell him what?

I think I'm in trouble.

A baby.

[Mary gasps]

You've been with a man?

I didn't want to.

He put his hand over my face and I could hardly breathe

and I was scared.

Oh, God in heaven.

Who was he?

It was that Billy.

Jimmie's friend.

[crying] It was so fast.

He was on top of me and then I started to cry

and then it was...

[Mary sobbing]

[Jeannie crying]

[Jim and Sandy singing drunkenly]

♪ With lily white tits and golden hair ♪

♪ Inky pinky parlez-vous ♪

[Jim and Sandy laughing]

♪ The German officers crossed the Rhine ♪

♪ Parlez-Vous ♪

[Sandy snoring] [dishes clattering]

RADIO: Now tell me, what was their reaction

to General Montgomery's message, the one in which

he told them there were more battles ahead?

Well, the average-trained,

experienced fighting soldier's reaction--

[Jim coughing]

in this war is the same.

He says, "Right, left, over, let's get on

with the next step."

Oh, my God.

[gasping and coughing]

Who the hell's in there?

JEANNIE: I'll be out in a second.

Well, hurry up, your old dad's in a bad way.

MARY: Is that you, Jim?

Aye.

Well, it's early.

You've only been to bed a few hours.

Try and get some more sleep, why don't ya?

Aye. [groaning]

I just only went in there.

Get down here, I must talk to ya.

What for, it's so early?

Get down here, I said!

RADIO: There was an expert Italian observer.

We may know the answer to the question very soon.

Britain's Minister of Production--

[floor boards squeak]

I've not slept a wink the whole night.

Jeannie, are ya sure?

Nothin's happened for three months.

Don't ya be smug.

You realize the trouble you're in?

Yes.

How many other men have ya been with?

None.

Well, that's filth, do you understand that, filth?

JIM: If I can't sleep any more, you can start the breakfast.

God down, we'd not last long.

What am I gonna tell him?

RADIO: The heart of the Axis

in Europe is a possible target.

[radio switch clicks]

[laughs] Has Sandy not moved yet, Tip?

Best not wake him, Jim.

Well, the old bugger will have a hell

of a head on him this morning, I'll wager.

I'll say one thing for that man.

He can be flat on his back from the booze

but he'll not pass out.

I'll have it for ya in a second, Jim.

Where you goin'?

Upstairs.

God almighty, you'd think a man could have

a wee bit of pleasure without payin' such a price.

MARY: A bit under are ya?

Aye.

You should know when to stop.

I know!

I know.

Well, here's your porridge, eat it while it's hot.

I'll start your eggs.

Turn 'em over, I don't want 'em

lookin' at me this morning.

What time are you on duty?

Not until noon.

That was a good evenin', though, wasn't it, Tip?

I mean, I think it went off all right.

Everyone seemed to have a good time.

Aye, it was lovely.

Tommy Dawson was sayin' that

he thought it was one of the best, um,

occasions they've had in a long while.

He was even hinting around that I might think

of taking a more active interest in the planning

and arranging of some of the functions myself.

They could use some changes.

[chuckles] Aye.

[coughs]

That is very well and true.

Did my thank you speech go off all right?

Aye, you were fine, Jim.

Now, that's the part I don't like.

I don't mind when it's just my boys,

but when there's strangers present, oh...

and ladies.

I don't go much on that stuff myself.

So, I think if they ask me again

I'll make that clear right from the beginning.

No speech makin'.

You're not eating.

No.

Jim, I'm afraid that somethin's happened.

I canna find the words to tell ya.

Huh?

It's to do with Jeannie.

Oh, what about her?

Well, come on, Tip.

Come on, what is it?

She's in trouble.

My Jeannie.

She's pregnant, Jim.

Where is she?

Oh Jim, before you,

please Jim, listen first.

Jim, please, what are ya gonna do?

I want to hear it from her.

MARY: Well, it wasn't her fault.

JIM: Let her tell it!

Jeannie!

Jeannie!

Come down, dear.

What's this your mother tells me?

I'm sorry.

You little bitch!

[Jeannie whimpering]

A filthy, bloody slut. [slapping]

Jim, Jim, stop it!

I'll show ya what I think of ya.

-Jim! -Ya slut.

In the name of God, Jim, please!

Where's my belt?

[Mary crying]

Sandy! God, Sandy, stop him!

What is it? What's happenin'?

He'll kill her, he'll kill her, you've gotta

-Jim! -stop him, please!

SANDY: Jim!

Oh, Jeannie. [crying]

SANDY: For God's sake, man, what are ya doin', man?

What is then?

Come on, now.

-Get out of my way. -Jim!

-Get out of my way! -Jim!

-Jim! -Let go.

Come to your senses!

Get out, get out, get out, get out!

-Jim! -Where are ya, whore?

Jim, for God's sake.

-Ya whore! -For God's sake.

Jim, do ya not hear me, man?

[mumbles], damn it!

Jim!

Get out.

Jim.

Jim, do you not hear me, man?

[Sandy shouting]

God damn it, open this bloody door!

-Jim! -Open the bloody door!

You'll not hit her again.

Jim, Jim, you'll not hit her again.

I say I'll call the police to help me.

God damn it, you don't understand.

I've got a whore for a daughter.

I'm disgraced.

[Jeannie crying]

Shh, Jeannie, shh.

Shh.

[rain pattering]

[somber orchestral music]

I'd best take Jeannie up somethin'.

You know, she prepared nearly the whole supper for me tonight?

Cleaned up the house real nice, too, don't ya think?

Can be a great help to me when she wants to be.

Could I not ask her to come down now, Jim?

I don't want to see the likes of her.

Have ya nothin' in your heart, Jim?

She can come down when I finish.

You must still love her some, Jim,

no matter what's happened.

You don't really want her to go away, I hope.

I'm a man of my word.

But where?

That's her bloody worry, not mine.

But she's only 16, she's never been away from us.

Where could she possibly go?

She's been around a lot more than we imagined, huh?

[chuckles] Regular little woman of the world.

MARY: That's not so.

She never even so much as had a boyfriend

all through school.

Mary, I know the kind of women

that take up with men the way she did.

It's in 'em and there's nothing you can do about her.

In the army we used to call 'em sluts.

Oh, Jeannie's not like that.

I brought her up the best way I knew how.

Believe in God and what's good.

There's somethin' I'll tell ya, oh I had my eye

on that one for a while now.

I could see the makings of a tramp.

Struttin' around in them high heels with her tits

stickin' out, plasterin' all that red shit on her face.

And this man, does he get no blame?

What woman doesn't know?

When she's away in the dark with a man

and he's feelin' her all over.

I knew she wasn't the brightest

but I never took her to be a bloody fool.

She's not too bright, but she's good.

She could love and make a fine home for some man.

Oh, love is it now?

Like in the movie pictures, eh?

With all the fine music and all. [chuckles]

No man would touch her now.

Wasn't much different with you and me, Jim.

What do you mean?

You took me before we was wed.

There was a hell of a lot of difference, let me tell you!

I was but 16, just like Jeannie.

I was workin' for the Kerr family then, remember?

They'd all gone out that night, you come over.

It was just the two of us in that big house.

I knew that you wanted me that way,

but I knew it wasn't right.

I tried, but I couldn't stop ya.

I don't remember that.

Well, I understood, I wanted to be good to ya,

but I just didn't want it there like that.

Women do dream that there'll really be fine music,

like in the pictures and everything will be wonderful.

How I cried afterwards, prayed to God

a thousand times to forgive me.

That was a hell of a long time ago, Tip.

Why do you twist everything around?

To make me out to be no better than he is?

We don't even know who the son of a bitch is.

Could be a bloody Chink or a Wop for all I know.

There's plenty of difference.

[coughs]

You made me pregnant, though, didn't ya?

Yes!

I made ya pregnant and I bloody well married ya.

I'll not let ya send Jeannie away, Jim.

You will not let me? And what is it you will do?

I want her to stay here and have her baby.

You what?

Oh look, Jim, I've thought about it.

After she's had the baby she can get herself a job

and I can look after it while she's away workin'.

Are you daft?

It would be somethin' for me.

You've got the service and Jeannie's young

with her whole life ahead of her, yet.

I'd look after it and I'd care for it real well, Jim.

Aye, you could wheel it down the street

and say, "Good morning, Mrs. Brown, how do you think

our wee bastard is lookin' today?"

But it would still be Jeannie's, a warm little baby.

I want it.

JIM: The hell with it!

I never want to be reminded of

the shame that she brought on this house.

It was that Billy who brought it!

That's a lie and you know it!

Jimmie's friend's a soldier.

A man of honor.

I'll not understand that I guess.

Honor.

A wee baby.

[record needle playing record]

[bagpipe music]

[Jim coughing]

[knocking on the door]

[laughing]

♪ Just a wee [mumbles] ♪

♪ Just to meet her up the shoal ♪

Hey, Jimmie!

Ho ho!

Come on and wake up, dear boy.

Well, now, what ya got here?

How now, brown cow?

Oh, Sandy is it?

Aye, it's your old buddy Sandy, that's who it is.

I must have dozed off, that's what I did.

That's what ya did, all right.

I'll bet that's what ya did.

I seen the light still on, and I says to meself,

is that my friend Jim's house?

Yup, I says.

Well, what's he doin' up at this hour, I ask.

Well, I don't know, I says.

There might be something wrong, says I,

so I better come in and see and there ya were,

just like that when I came in.

No, I just dozed off, that's all.

Aye.

Well, go on, help yourself.

Aye, I don't mind if I do.

JIM: At the club, were ya?

No. [laughs]

Well, not on duty.

No.

Well, come on.

I was looking after Sarah tonight, I was, aye.

Well, she's a good woman.

My very words, Jimmie, my very words.

She made up a hell of a fine dinner, too, she did.

A meal fit for a king.

[chuckles]

Is she any good in the bed? [laughs]

Hey?

Aw, how could ya think it of me, Jimmie?

Come on, you old bugger.

She's been without her husband for a while.

I reckon she'd do a good time.

[laughs] Like it was her very last.

-♪ What she's got for me ♪ -Oh no.

♪ And I can't eat it for my tea ♪

♪ But we can take it up to bed ♪

♪ Cause I can do it 'til I'm dead ♪

[laughing]

Hey, let me say she's as appreciated as hell.

We'll put it that way, eh? [laughs]

Travers, you could fall into your shithouse

and come up covered in diamonds.

[laughing]

I don't know where you get your strength.

Still screwin' at your age, huh?

SANDY: [laughs] Aye.

Right. Right, now listen.

I can give them women anything them green laddies can.

-[Jimmie mumbles] -And a lot longer, too.

And I'm not the man of principle that we was, Jimmie.

I mean, you take that rat's ass that did

wee poor Jeannie, and then up and deserts her,

a fine soft young girl like that.

You can not call that a man, now can ya, eh?

I don't know where I-- where I went wrong.

Also did my best to be a good husband and father.

Aye, you've done well.

No I've not, I fear.

Oh now listen, there's not a better man anywhere

what I know and anybody that says different

has got to account to me.

-Here, let me fill ya up. -Aye.

[gulps] Ah!

There should be some kind of laws or somethin'.

It's not right.

-Aye. -SANDY: Aye.

Aye.

Maybe, maybe you could find a husband for her somewhere.

Aye, that's what ya gotta do, Jimmie.

That's what you got to do.

Who the hell would touch her now?

Well, if I was a few years younger, I sure as hell would.

She's a fine looking lassie.

[laughs and coughs]

I would, I would.

A wee wife and little ones is somethin' I've always wanted

but it's never been found to happen that way for me.

There's no finer lassie.

Just because she's been taken advantage of

doesn't alter the fact that she's bred from real good stock.

And don't I know it, and that's what counts.

Aye.

It's with kindness that you're speakin' now.

Ah, no, Jeannie's a lovely,

well, I mean, any man would be honored, I've said.

But the lass has a mind of her own,

she'd no want the likes of an old man like me.

She's young.

Aye, young and soft.

[whispering] Aye.

Well, I'll be gone to hell.

I believe you're serious, man.

Oh, forgive me, Jim, forgive me.

It's just that I'd cut off my right arm

if I thought it would help ya in any way.

A friend indeed.

Here's to our friendship.

Aye, thank ya, Jimmie. [chuckling]

Jeannie!

SANDY: Oh, Jim, don't go wakin' the missus and all.

Jeannie!

[light switch clicks]

Drink up, my friend.

Put on the Victrola, let's have some music.

What is it, Jim?

Go wake the girl and bring her down.

-But why, Jim? -Do what I say, Tip.

And tell her to brush her hair a bit.

[men laughing]

[bagpipe music]

Hey, hey, hey. [laughs]

What's so funny, Jimmie?

I was just thinkin', if you were to marry my Jeannie,

[laughs] you'd be my son-in-law.

[laughing]

Hey, and you'd be me father-in-law!

[laughing]

Jeannie, you gonna lend me a hand here or not?

Uh-huh.

[exhales] Now, if we was to make some new curtains

and Sandy don't mind paintin' a bit.

The good Lord shoulda give me another pair of hands,

I don't know how I'll get it all done in time.

Be different after you're married, ya know.

I'll not be pickin' up after the two of ya.

[knocking on door]

[sighs] Who can that be?

Oh, Sarah, you look fancy.

Come in, come in.

Hello, Mary.

You know, I was just sayin' to myself in the kitchen

I must call Sarah one of these days.

Been nearly two weeks now, hasn't it?

Here, let me have your coat.

Thank you, Mary.

I've only dropped by for a minute.

Hello, Jeannie.

Hello, Mrs. McCarver.

MARY: Now, I think it's turned colder, don't you?

Either that or my blood's gettin' thinner.

Just in time for a cup of tea, Sarah.

Oh, like I say, I can only stay a minute.

I just dropped in to see if you'd heard

the news about poor Mrs. Black.

MARY: No, I didn't.

What happened to her?

SARAH: Had another attack, she did.

Oh, how bad is it?

Oh, she's no strength at all.

Doctor says she's not to leave her bed.

MARY: Well, I'll take her some broth.

I'll look in on her over the weekend,

see if there's anything needs doin'.

She's too old to look after herself anyway.

Aye, age is an unkind thing.

I'm glad that ya told me.

Poor thing.

Jeannie, will you fix the kettle, love?

Oh really, I can't stay, Mary.

Oh, nonsense, you can't be leavin'

without havin' a cup of tea to warm your innards.

Sit down, sit down.

I had wanted to ask ya somethin' else as well.

Oh?

Tell you the truth, I feel very silly

even askin', mind ya.

Knowin' my Sandy, the way he's always

havin' his jokes on people.

MARY: Aye, he's always been like that.

He was to dinner last night.

He is, most Thursdays.

Course, he always comes on Sundays.

First time he ever missed was last Sunday.

He said somethin' very funny to me on Thursday.

He said he wouldn't be comin' by anymore.

He said that he and Jeannie were goin' to get married.

Surely it isn't true, Mary.

I'm sorry, Sarah.

Jeannie and Sandy?

I thought he was havin' one of his little jokes with me.

Who would have ever imagined.

Oh, God in heaven!

Well, I hope you'll both be very happy.

May I have my coat, please, Mary?

No one meant to hurt you, Sarah.

SARAH: Don't be offering me any sympathy.

It's just that you find out that people

who you think are your friends

are carryin' on behind your back.

Now, that's not true, Sarah.

But it is true!

And you!

You little scamp, what do you want

with someone like Sandy?

Why can't ya find someone younger like yourself?

Disgustin', cheap people, that's what ya are!

Sarah.

[crying] And you, Mary.

All these years, all these years. [crying]

Don't you come back here again.

You can't be callin' us things like that.

[crying]

Hi, Tip.

Was that Sarah I just passed goin' down the road?

Mm-hmm.

Ah, I thought it was.

She didn't say a bloody word, she didn't.

She didn't even look up when I went by.

She was here askin' about the weddin'.

Oh.

Oh, well, it can't be helped.

She's a good woman, aye.

I always liked Sarah.

Where's Jeannie?

Makin' the tea.

Oh, don't take on so.

Somebody's always got to be hurt in these affairs.

Jeannie!

Jeannie, come on, come in here.

I picked up something for ya on my way home, I did.

For me?

Goddamn it, that's what I said, didn't I?

Go on, open it up.

It's beautiful.

See Mom?

Aye.

Where did ya get it, Jim?

I picked it up the seconds on 4th Street.

Of course that's not exactly brand new,

but I'll be damned if I'm gonna pay out a whole lot of money

just for a dress you wear one day.

A fella there said it cost over $50 when it was new.

Here, Jeannie, let me see.

It's a bit soiled near the bottom,

but I expect we can clean that up easy enough.

Yes, of course you can.

Just go over it a bit with your flat iron,

it'll look as good as new.

It's beautiful.

You think it would be proper, her wearin' this?

Well, a wedding is a wedding.

And that there is a wedding dress, isn't it?

I know, but...

Jeannie, let's see how it fits on ya.

Aye, you'll look lovely.

Boy, wait 'til Dolly sees this.

Dad, can I have Dolly come?

Uh, I guess so.

[squeals] Thanks.

Now Jeannie, don't you be foolin' about.

-There's too much -I'm just gonna call Dolly.

MARY: to do as it is.

Upstairs, young lady.

There's adjustments to be made and everything.

JIM: Do as your mother tells ya.

I want everything ship-shape!

You'll be married at 4:00 tomorrow.

[rain pattering]

[somber orchestral music]

[thunder rumbles]

[lightning cracks]

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here

in the presence of God to join this man

and this woman in holy matrimony,

which is an honorable estate ordained of God

unto the fulfilling and perfecting

of the love of man and woman in mutual honor

and forbearance and therefore is not by any

to be taken in hand lightly or thoughtlessly,

but reverently, discretely, soberly,

and in the fear of God.

Into which holy estate these two persons present

come now to be joined.

Therefore, if any man can show just cause

why they may not lawfully be joined together,

let him now speak or else hereafter

forever hold his peace.

[men singing drunkenly and laughing]

Hey, give the girls one, too, Jim.

No, I won't, to hell with them.

They're too young.

[men shouting]

I want ya all to drink your share,

I got a whole ice box full of beer out there in the kitchen.

[men shout]

God bless ya, for your generosity, Dougal.

Well, it's not every day that a man

marries off his only daughter.

Here, here!

And a finer man you couldn't have found.

-Right, right. -I'll drink to that.

[men laughing]

JIM: Love moves in strange ways.

I'm here to tell ya, here he is, my best friend

and my only daughter, and me with nary an idea

about how they feel about each other.

Then one day Jeannie comes to me and she says to me,

"Dad, I love Sandy."

Aww!

And him not sayin' a word.

Well, you know why don't ya, it's obvious.

Because he is a deceitful old man.

[men laughing]

I'm not.

So, I get the two of them together and I said,

"I am a man of a few years myself, but I hope

that I've gathered a bit of wisdom with it."

"Sandy," I says, "I know you are a wee bitty older

"than my lass, but I know the man ya are.

"And I know you'll treat my Jeannie right

and thems the things that's important to me."

So I says to him, I says, "Children," I says,

"Ya have my blessing."

And a finer man you couldn't want to meet,

as you have already said, gentlemen.

-[men cheer and applaud] -Right, right.

Here's to him and ones like him.

Well, I was best man and I'm supposed

to make a speech, but I'll be damned if I'm gonna.

That's a blessin'.

That's enough out of you, Bob.

Actually, I haven't got much to say.

I've known Sandy for a good many years

and all I can say is it's nice to see him

settling down at last.

At last!

[men shout in agreement]

-Aye, at last. -At last, aye.

I hope you'll both be very happy, Sandy.

Thank you, Tommy.

Now, I think I'm supposed to propose a toast

to, uh, the bride, so gentlemen, if you'll rise

and join me in this toast.

To a very lovely bride.

-Here, here. -To the bride!

-MAN: To the bride. -MAN 2: The wee lassie.

[men clapping]

In case ya don't know it, Sandy, you're supposed

to respond to that toast.

[men chattering]

Well, I mean, I've not been married before.

How the hell was I to know?

[men laugh]

But it's the truth anyway.

It's come a wee bit late in life for me.

Ah, not too late, eh, Sandy?

[men laughing]

SANDY: But I'll make a good husband.

I know, I know.

[men chattering]

And I wanna thank you, too, Tommy.

Aye, for what ya said about my wee wife.

She's a fine thing, all right, and I'm a lucky man.

[men chattering]

I think the drinks are catching up a wee bit on me, too.

Ah, there ain't enough drink in the world

for Sandy Travers.

[men chattering]

Hello to you, too, Bob.

♪ The anniversary waltz with you ♪

♪ Tell me is this is real romance ♪

Come on Dougal, you're supposed to dance with him.

Come on!

I don't want to.

You dance.

[men singing drunkenly]

♪ To millions of smiles ♪

♪ And a few little tears ♪

♪ May I always listen to ♪

♪ The Anniversary Waltz with you ♪

Well, there he goes.

[men chattering and laughing]

Hey, hey.

This is the way you're supposed to be the morning after.

[men laughing]

Jeannie, Jeannie.

Yeah, come on Jeannie.

Jeannie!

[men chattering]

And another bloody beer that's all.

Give him a beer, Jim.

I'll give you another beer.

[men laughing]

Ya christened him!

[men laughing]

That's a hell of a thing to do with beer.

[men laughing]

That is a hell of a way to be speakin'

to your father-in-law.

[men laughing]

Oh, what is so funny?

All my life...

[men chattering]

I think everyone,

I think we should all be on our way

and let the loved ones be alone for a little while.

What the hell are ya talkin' about?

We're just gettin' us a good party goin' here.

Well, I think Sandy's

got other things on his mind, Jim.

-[men laughing] -The hell with that.

We can't go now, I've got all this beer in the cooler

and Mary's prepared all this food, sandwiches and all.

Oh, Jim, Jim, Jim, it wouldn't be fair to Sandy.

They wanna be alone.

Oh, the hell with them.

I have an idea, why not take everything,

take everything over to my place

and carry on from there.

[men shouting over each other]

Tip, we're going over to Tommy's.

Come on, gimme a hand with the booze.

Come on, come on, let's go.

JIM: There's a case down there, man.

♪ We're going to have us a party ♪

♪ We're going to have us a party ♪

♪ We're going to have us a party ♪

♪ Nobody can deny ♪

♪ Nobody can deny, nobody can deny ♪

Well, I'll see ya, kiddo.

Gee, you don't have to go already?

Well, yeah, everybody's leavin'.

Mom?

You're not going, too, are you?

We must, Jeannie.

Come on, Tip.

It'll be all right.

[car horn honking]

[door thuds]

[car engine starts]

[Jeannie cries]

[Sandy snoring]

[Jeannie crying]

[bottle thuds on the floor]

Where the hell have they all gone?

[chair falling]

[Jeannie crying]

Aye, you're not cryin' are ya?

Oh, Jeannie, oh, come on.

Come on.

[Jeannie crying]

Oh, don't be frightened of old Sandy.

[Jeannie whimpering]

See, it's only me.

Nothin' to be scared of.

[Jeannie sniveling]

Oh, my head's a splittin'.

[laughs]

I don't trust meself on these stairs, lassie.

Will ya no give me a hand, Jeannie?

[light switch clicks]

Come on.

Hey.

Come on, lassie.

That's it, girl, aye.

[chuckles]

Easy now, easy, easy.

Aye, easy now.

That's a girl.

Aye lass, that's a girl.

Easy-- easy there,

easy now.

Aye, that's a girl.

[Sandy grunts]

[Sandy laughing]

-[slap] -[laughing]

[door closing]

[clock ticking]

[somber orchestral music]