Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
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00:00:01,766 --> 00:00:04,593
I give you the product
that will carry Hooli
2
00:00:04,617 --> 00:00:07,226
to complete market dominance.
3
00:00:07,251 --> 00:00:09,001
[APPLAUSE, CHEERING]
4
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- MAN: [WHISPERS] It looks like a penis.
- Yes... Yes, it does.
5
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_
6
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So, we're giving a random company
7
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a bunch of free compute
power in our network?
8
00:00:18,171 --> 00:00:19,304
BERTRAM GILFOYLE: The AI company?
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I made her! I can do
anything I want with her!
10
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Ugh. Gross.
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00:00:25,129 --> 00:00:28,170
Can you please tell me
what you are going to do
12
00:00:28,171 --> 00:00:30,182
about this Jian Yang situation?
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Yes. Nothing.
14
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"I went to China to do new
new internet. Jian Yang."
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_
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RICHARD: This went up yesterday.
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A fake Pied Piper. This
is Jian-Yang, not us.
18
00:00:50,270 --> 00:00:52,212
Richard, he has a website.
19
00:00:52,213 --> 00:00:53,628
Okay? He doesn't have a product.
20
00:00:53,629 --> 00:00:55,087
Just post a cease and desist
21
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on your own website and move on.
22
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We need action.
23
00:00:58,281 --> 00:01:01,114
I wanna move up our launch so we
can beat this asshole to market.
24
00:01:01,213 --> 00:01:05,115
We need money. So, how quickly
can we get a series B together?
25
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Richard, a series B is not a done deal.
26
00:01:08,572 --> 00:01:10,530
And Laurie's not gonna be
able to weigh in on this
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00:01:10,531 --> 00:01:12,405
until she's done sorting
things out over at Eklow.
28
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Why is she still over there?
29
00:01:13,572 --> 00:01:16,905
We put 112 million of
our dollars into a company
30
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whose creepy CEO just fled
with its most valuable asset.
31
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Ariel and that robot could be anywhere.
32
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Ariel fucked us too, remember?
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I just had my whole company
on a three-day code sprint
34
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to repair all the holes
35
00:01:29,156 --> 00:01:30,696
and un-fuck all the damage he did.
36
00:01:30,697 --> 00:01:32,863
Besides, Laurie doesn't work at Eklow.
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She works here, with you and me.
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True,
39
00:01:35,909 --> 00:01:37,641
but also not true.
40
00:01:38,426 --> 00:01:42,005
Look, Laurie has installed
herself as Eklow's interim CEO.
41
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What?
42
00:01:42,989 --> 00:01:45,759
Laurie, Ariel encrypted all of his files.
43
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We can't open any of them.
44
00:01:46,975 --> 00:01:48,974
Ah, understood. Keep trying, please.
45
00:01:48,975 --> 00:01:49,975
I spoke with the bank.
46
00:01:49,976 --> 00:01:51,411
We're not gonna make payroll.
47
00:01:52,016 --> 00:01:55,155
Noted. Thank you for your
diligence. People are pretty upset.
48
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Somebody shattered the toilet.
49
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Ah, yes, well, we'll certainly
50
00:01:58,333 --> 00:02:00,083
have to get that repaired, won't we?
51
00:02:01,403 --> 00:02:02,826
Good work, you two.
52
00:02:03,387 --> 00:02:04,533
Hang in there.
53
00:02:04,533 --> 00:02:06,575
♪
54
00:02:10,128 --> 00:02:11,335
Hey, Laurie.
55
00:02:11,364 --> 00:02:13,529
I know you're "busy" being a "CEO,"
56
00:02:13,530 --> 00:02:15,570
but we have to have a
serious conversation about...
57
00:02:15,570 --> 00:02:17,529
[LAURIE RETCHING]
58
00:02:21,248 --> 00:02:22,539
- LAURIE: Richard?
- Yes?
59
00:02:23,706 --> 00:02:25,785
I have vomited into my shirt.
60
00:02:25,786 --> 00:02:27,870
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
61
00:02:36,053 --> 00:02:38,053
Synced and corrected by louvette
www.addic7ed.com
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00:02:38,754 --> 00:02:39,814
Puking.
63
00:02:40,062 --> 00:02:41,213
That's my move.
64
00:02:41,562 --> 00:02:43,191
Thank you for...
65
00:02:45,979 --> 00:02:47,278
finding me a...
66
00:02:47,812 --> 00:02:49,145
a change of clothing.
67
00:02:49,146 --> 00:02:51,936
Well, fortunately, you're
the same size as the robot.
68
00:02:51,937 --> 00:02:54,646
Richard, the position of CEO is...
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00:02:55,104 --> 00:02:56,311
taxing.
70
00:02:56,312 --> 00:02:57,942
It isn't easy, is it?
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00:02:58,271 --> 00:03:00,194
I think perhaps I may have
72
00:03:01,040 --> 00:03:03,517
treated you unfairly in the past.
73
00:03:04,053 --> 00:03:05,076
Oh..
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00:03:06,935 --> 00:03:08,036
[SCOFFS] Well...
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00:03:08,061 --> 00:03:10,936
I mean, a couple... a
couple... yeah. Sure. Thank you.
76
00:03:11,166 --> 00:03:12,861
Thank you for saying that, yeah.
77
00:03:12,861 --> 00:03:13,816
Yes.
78
00:03:16,579 --> 00:03:18,537
Well, I have work to do, as do you, so.
79
00:03:21,861 --> 00:03:22,903
[SCOFFS]
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00:03:27,903 --> 00:03:29,902
♪
81
00:03:29,903 --> 00:03:31,443
[INDISTINCT CHATTERING]
82
00:03:31,887 --> 00:03:35,738
You know, Laurie, I actually
may have a way to help you here.
83
00:03:37,430 --> 00:03:39,833
YAO: Things are changing
in China now, Gavin.
84
00:03:40,043 --> 00:03:41,491
There are many reforms.
85
00:03:41,711 --> 00:03:43,836
As you see, we provide a series
86
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of Tai Chi and movement classes,
87
00:03:45,838 --> 00:03:47,557
free for all employees,
88
00:03:47,749 --> 00:03:50,121
as well as free medical benefits.
89
00:03:50,546 --> 00:03:53,295
Ah, our nutrition center.
90
00:03:53,296 --> 00:03:55,212
In addition to all the good food
91
00:03:55,213 --> 00:03:57,549
we serve in our main cafeteria.
92
00:03:58,088 --> 00:03:59,528
Also free of charge.
93
00:04:00,754 --> 00:04:02,146
This concludes our tour.
94
00:04:02,462 --> 00:04:03,674
Any questions?
95
00:04:03,900 --> 00:04:04,977
Just one.
96
00:04:05,586 --> 00:04:07,002
What the fuck?
97
00:04:07,066 --> 00:04:09,107
- Sorry?
- If I wanted to see nap pods
98
00:04:09,108 --> 00:04:11,232
and climbing walls, I would've stayed home,
99
00:04:11,233 --> 00:04:12,440
or gone to fucking Denmark.
100
00:04:12,441 --> 00:04:14,274
All I wanna see is people working
101
00:04:14,275 --> 00:04:15,991
as hard as they possibly can.
102
00:04:15,991 --> 00:04:17,408
That's why we come to China.
103
00:04:17,408 --> 00:04:18,616
This is the new China.
104
00:04:19,000 --> 00:04:22,407
We found that the more humane
work environment we have,
105
00:04:22,408 --> 00:04:24,366
the more sustainable over time.
106
00:04:24,367 --> 00:04:25,741
Over time? No, no.
107
00:04:25,742 --> 00:04:29,228
The Box Three has a very
limited window of profitability.
108
00:04:29,275 --> 00:04:32,107
I need you focused on making
as many of them as possible,
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00:04:32,108 --> 00:04:33,673
as fast as possible.
110
00:04:33,673 --> 00:04:34,599
Gavin.
111
00:04:34,840 --> 00:04:36,922
You know our shameful history
112
00:04:37,094 --> 00:04:38,864
of worker suicides.
113
00:04:39,007 --> 00:04:42,200
Since the renovation, not a single one.
114
00:04:42,506 --> 00:04:43,714
GAVIN: Not even one?
115
00:04:43,831 --> 00:04:44,774
Okay.
116
00:04:45,164 --> 00:04:47,196
But there's gotta be
like a middle ground here.
117
00:04:47,656 --> 00:04:49,080
[WOMAN SPEAKS CHINESE]
118
00:04:49,081 --> 00:04:51,034
Ah, a happy surprise.
119
00:04:51,248 --> 00:04:52,997
The children from our daycare center have
120
00:04:52,998 --> 00:04:55,405
prepared a traditional song just for you.
121
00:04:56,331 --> 00:04:59,609
[SINGING IN CHINESE]
122
00:05:00,078 --> 00:05:01,119
That's wonderful.
123
00:05:02,456 --> 00:05:04,539
Yao, I need you to give me 30% more output.
124
00:05:04,540 --> 00:05:05,817
I don't care how you do it.
125
00:05:06,331 --> 00:05:07,521
Just a thought,
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00:05:08,196 --> 00:05:09,778
those kids don't look that busy.
127
00:05:13,498 --> 00:05:14,664
[SINGING CONTINUES]
128
00:05:16,324 --> 00:05:17,580
[TYPING]
129
00:05:17,581 --> 00:05:20,021
Are you done with... your chunk yet?
130
00:05:20,021 --> 00:05:21,164
Almost done.
131
00:05:21,165 --> 00:05:22,997
Because everyone else is done.
132
00:05:23,042 --> 00:05:24,548
- Literally everyone.
- [SNORING]
133
00:05:24,573 --> 00:05:26,635
47 engineers finished.
134
00:05:27,045 --> 00:05:28,366
One not.
135
00:05:28,855 --> 00:05:29,836
You.
136
00:05:29,837 --> 00:05:32,212
- Almost there.
- I'm sure it'll be worth the wait.
137
00:05:34,920 --> 00:05:35,920
[SLURPS]
138
00:05:36,319 --> 00:05:38,558
Mmm, no, that's way too strong for him.
139
00:05:38,558 --> 00:05:40,557
Hey, guys. How's the code sprint going?
140
00:05:40,559 --> 00:05:42,142
T-minus Dinesh.
141
00:05:42,143 --> 00:05:43,975
JARED: Richard, I am pleased to say
142
00:05:43,976 --> 00:05:46,267
that your new assistant is a quick study.
143
00:05:46,268 --> 00:05:49,142
And per your text, he posted
a well-crafted cease and desist
144
00:05:49,143 --> 00:05:51,591
directed at Jian-Yang on
the Pied Piper website.
145
00:05:51,925 --> 00:05:54,975
I made some judicious
edits to capture your voice,
146
00:05:54,976 --> 00:05:57,405
but the thrust of the piece was his.
147
00:05:57,976 --> 00:05:59,309
I have a law degree, so.
148
00:05:59,310 --> 00:06:00,309
Well done, Holden.
149
00:06:00,518 --> 00:06:01,892
Is that tea for me?
150
00:06:01,893 --> 00:06:03,476
- It is, indeed.
- Okay. Great.
151
00:06:03,477 --> 00:06:04,642
No, no, no, no, don't.
152
00:06:04,643 --> 00:06:05,725
It's too strong.
153
00:06:05,726 --> 00:06:07,417
- Okay.
- Water it down.
154
00:06:10,643 --> 00:06:14,309
So, did you speak to
Laurie about our series B?
155
00:06:14,310 --> 00:06:15,310
Sort of.
156
00:06:15,311 --> 00:06:17,683
Uh, Gilfoyle, is there a secure way
157
00:06:17,684 --> 00:06:20,517
of giving someone access to our servers
158
00:06:20,518 --> 00:06:22,558
while still limiting and controlling
159
00:06:22,559 --> 00:06:23,808
how much compute they could use?
160
00:06:23,809 --> 00:06:25,600
I could create a credit system.
161
00:06:25,601 --> 00:06:28,351
Wait, I'm sorry, Richard. Who
would these credits be for?
162
00:06:28,352 --> 00:06:31,100
Laurie Bream. She made
herself CEO of Eklow.
163
00:06:31,101 --> 00:06:33,209
- I'm just trying to help her out.
- Pardon?
164
00:06:33,256 --> 00:06:35,017
Do you think you could
set those up by today?
165
00:06:35,018 --> 00:06:36,517
More work. Fantastic.
166
00:06:36,518 --> 00:06:38,398
Richard, I don't quite understand...
167
00:06:38,518 --> 00:06:39,541
DINESH: Done!
168
00:06:39,726 --> 00:06:42,383
Done! I am done!
169
00:06:42,851 --> 00:06:44,518
[DINESH LAUGHING]
170
00:06:45,768 --> 00:06:47,017
Look at this!
171
00:06:47,119 --> 00:06:48,336
Whoo!
172
00:06:49,251 --> 00:06:50,600
- Code sprint over.
- _
173
00:06:50,601 --> 00:06:52,393
- [GONG RINGS]
- [APPLAUSE]
174
00:06:57,143 --> 00:06:58,600
[GONG QUIETS]
175
00:06:58,601 --> 00:07:00,558
Uh, congratulations, everybody.
176
00:07:00,559 --> 00:07:01,683
Really, good... good job.
177
00:07:01,684 --> 00:07:05,309
Um, the only thing left
to do now is... Uh...
178
00:07:05,310 --> 00:07:09,046
get back to work and review
all the code for errors.
179
00:07:09,504 --> 00:07:10,921
- Okay, so...
- [GROANING]
180
00:07:12,559 --> 00:07:13,518
Okay.
181
00:07:13,519 --> 00:07:15,100
That was an
out-of-body experience.
182
00:07:15,101 --> 00:07:17,347
It was like God was coding through me.
183
00:07:17,347 --> 00:07:18,808
Time stood still.
184
00:07:18,809 --> 00:07:20,434
Not for the rest of us it didn't.
185
00:07:20,435 --> 00:07:21,911
Laugh it up, Gilf.
186
00:07:22,060 --> 00:07:24,683
I hear you making your
little jokes at my expense,
187
00:07:24,684 --> 00:07:26,808
turning all the engineers against me.
188
00:07:26,809 --> 00:07:29,558
But the second these results go up,
189
00:07:29,559 --> 00:07:33,171
they're all going to see the
only thing that matters...
190
00:07:33,352 --> 00:07:35,023
Who made less errors.
191
00:07:35,185 --> 00:07:37,142
You mean who made "fewer" errors?
192
00:07:37,143 --> 00:07:38,934
Oh, you think you're so clever.
193
00:07:38,935 --> 00:07:40,642
You know who else thought it was clever?
194
00:07:40,643 --> 00:07:41,643
The hare.
195
00:07:41,644 --> 00:07:44,267
Right before it was
defeated by the tortoise.
196
00:07:44,268 --> 00:07:46,267
I'm the fucking tortoise, Gilfoyle.
197
00:07:46,268 --> 00:07:49,017
- I'm the fucking tortoise!
- Keep saying that.
198
00:07:49,018 --> 00:07:50,767
I can't wait for these results to go up.
199
00:07:50,768 --> 00:07:53,808
Guys? No, no, no. We
talked about this. Remember?
200
00:07:53,809 --> 00:07:55,142
You're both senior management now.
201
00:07:55,143 --> 00:07:57,767
Okay? Your code will be
subject to private review.
202
00:07:57,768 --> 00:07:59,642
No. No, no, no, not private.
203
00:07:59,643 --> 00:08:01,517
Everyone has to know that
I'm better than Gilfoyle.
204
00:08:01,518 --> 00:08:03,351
I'm sorry. When it was just us,
205
00:08:03,352 --> 00:08:05,850
a little cocksmanship was a fun diversion.
206
00:08:05,851 --> 00:08:08,100
But the entire engineering team's morale
207
00:08:08,101 --> 00:08:10,934
depends on seeing you both
as equally competent leaders.
208
00:08:10,935 --> 00:08:13,267
Danny over there is going
to be reviewing your code,
209
00:08:13,268 --> 00:08:15,893
and keeping the results
completely confidential.
210
00:08:16,935 --> 00:08:17,968
Jared...
211
00:08:18,185 --> 00:08:21,975
I believe we all know who's
the better coder anyway.
212
00:08:21,976 --> 00:08:23,261
Um, Richard?
213
00:08:23,431 --> 00:08:27,014
I'm sorry, I'm still having a little
bit of a hard time understanding.
214
00:08:27,014 --> 00:08:29,888
You went to see Laurie
to get money from her
215
00:08:30,043 --> 00:08:32,831
but now you're giving our resources to her.
216
00:08:33,472 --> 00:08:34,846
Why would you do that?
217
00:08:34,956 --> 00:08:37,997
Well, honestly Jared, she was a mess.
218
00:08:38,223 --> 00:08:41,638
And I really, genuinely felt bad for her.
219
00:08:41,847 --> 00:08:43,181
For Laurie?
220
00:08:44,306 --> 00:08:45,348
Yup.
221
00:08:48,056 --> 00:08:51,721
Richard, you have an enormous heart.
222
00:08:52,096 --> 00:08:55,722
And I don't mean in the same way
my deceased friend Gloria did,
223
00:08:56,200 --> 00:08:58,014
which the doctors should have really caught
224
00:08:58,014 --> 00:09:00,263
because her knuckles were gargantuan.
225
00:09:00,264 --> 00:09:02,471
But do you think in this instance,
226
00:09:02,816 --> 00:09:04,471
you might have allowed your emotions
227
00:09:04,472 --> 00:09:06,638
to cloud your business instincts?
228
00:09:06,911 --> 00:09:10,055
Well, I would argue that I made
a very good business decision.
229
00:09:10,056 --> 00:09:12,138
Because now, Laurie is on our side.
230
00:09:12,325 --> 00:09:15,758
Which will play out very nicely
when we negotiate our series B.
231
00:09:15,758 --> 00:09:17,784
Okay, Richard, it is important
232
00:09:17,809 --> 00:09:21,100
to develop emotional self-discipline
for situations like this.
233
00:09:21,101 --> 00:09:23,258
- Mm-hmm.
- Sometimes you have to numb yourself.
234
00:09:23,519 --> 00:09:24,851
If you wanna work the corner,
235
00:09:24,852 --> 00:09:27,018
you can't fall in love
every time you turn a trick.
236
00:09:27,019 --> 00:09:28,393
That's why you do the oxy.
237
00:09:28,394 --> 00:09:31,559
What I'm saying is if you
ever need to develop strategies
238
00:09:31,560 --> 00:09:34,185
to cultivate more emotional self-control,
239
00:09:34,186 --> 00:09:37,060
- obviously I do have some experience.
- You do?
240
00:09:37,061 --> 00:09:38,310
Doubtless you've noticed
241
00:09:38,311 --> 00:09:40,101
that I've been pulling away from you.
242
00:09:40,102 --> 00:09:43,684
Uh, no... no, I can't...
honestly say that I have.
243
00:09:44,437 --> 00:09:45,809
Look at Holden out there.
244
00:09:46,098 --> 00:09:48,327
You think I didn't love making your tea?
245
00:09:48,358 --> 00:09:49,286
Who wouldn't?
246
00:09:49,286 --> 00:09:51,077
But, when you anointed me COO,
247
00:09:51,078 --> 00:09:54,576
I learned to stop investing
those feelings in you
248
00:09:54,577 --> 00:09:56,035
for the good of the company.
249
00:09:56,744 --> 00:09:59,077
Call it emotional abstinence.
250
00:09:59,078 --> 00:10:00,160
Jared, look, um,
251
00:10:00,161 --> 00:10:01,910
in regards to the whole Laurie thing,
252
00:10:01,911 --> 00:10:03,671
I actually think I made the right call.
253
00:10:03,869 --> 00:10:04,952
- Alright.
- Alright.
254
00:10:04,953 --> 00:10:07,138
Well, I am available.
255
00:10:07,994 --> 00:10:10,577
Not emotionally, obviously.
256
00:10:11,794 --> 00:10:12,876
Got it.
257
00:10:12,994 --> 00:10:15,618
[STREET NOISE]
258
00:10:15,619 --> 00:10:18,868
Ooh, there's a highly rated
new dim sum establishment
259
00:10:18,869 --> 00:10:19,869
in this neighborhood.
260
00:10:19,870 --> 00:10:21,618
Sir, Richard Hendricks just posted
261
00:10:21,619 --> 00:10:23,308
a cease and desist letter.
262
00:10:23,495 --> 00:10:26,940
"unlawful copying of Pied
Piper's proprietary software."
263
00:10:27,078 --> 00:10:28,701
Are you fucking kidding me?
264
00:10:28,702 --> 00:10:30,868
That idiot let someone steal his code,
265
00:10:30,869 --> 00:10:32,660
so now there might be two companies
266
00:10:32,661 --> 00:10:34,366
working to make my box obsolete?
267
00:10:34,453 --> 00:10:36,198
I'll try to find out who's responsible.
268
00:10:36,331 --> 00:10:40,163
Good luck. HooliMaps
says dim sum is that way.
269
00:10:40,328 --> 00:10:41,743
Right turn, please.
270
00:10:41,744 --> 00:10:43,161
[TIRES SCREECH]
271
00:10:44,203 --> 00:10:46,119
[BOTH YELLING IN CHINESE]
272
00:10:51,869 --> 00:10:53,291
GAVIN: Look! Pied Piper!
273
00:10:53,291 --> 00:10:54,540
Follow that Chinese man.
274
00:10:55,415 --> 00:10:57,101
The Chinese man on the bicycle.
275
00:10:57,525 --> 00:11:00,299
The Chinese man on the bicycle
in the green Pied Piper t-shirt.
276
00:11:00,324 --> 00:11:01,306
Ah.
277
00:11:01,582 --> 00:11:03,748
GAVIN: Hurry, hurry!
Come on! Don't lose him.
278
00:11:03,749 --> 00:11:05,582
[CLICKING TONGUE]
279
00:11:10,082 --> 00:11:11,581
Hey dude, how's it goin'?
280
00:11:11,886 --> 00:11:14,145
How's that... review going?
281
00:11:14,457 --> 00:11:15,748
Probably done, right?
282
00:11:15,972 --> 00:11:17,429
'Cause it took you no time
283
00:11:17,430 --> 00:11:18,917
counting up the bugs in my stuff?
284
00:11:19,180 --> 00:11:21,489
'Cause I crushed it so hard?
285
00:11:23,013 --> 00:11:24,232
Compared to Gilfoyle?
286
00:11:25,748 --> 00:11:26,748
Right?
287
00:11:29,264 --> 00:11:31,162
I get it. I get it. It's a secret.
288
00:11:31,422 --> 00:11:33,714
Company morale. I'm so on board.
289
00:11:34,888 --> 00:11:36,264
I did crush him, right?
290
00:11:37,923 --> 00:11:39,190
He did better than me?
291
00:11:39,710 --> 00:11:40,792
Oh my God.
292
00:11:40,793 --> 00:11:42,357
This is my worst fucking nightmare.
293
00:11:42,657 --> 00:11:44,282
But not by a lot, right?
294
00:11:44,283 --> 00:11:45,866
He didn't like kick my ass?
295
00:11:47,888 --> 00:11:49,157
He kicked my ass?
296
00:11:49,340 --> 00:11:50,858
That fucker!
297
00:11:50,983 --> 00:11:52,324
Just fucking tell me.
298
00:11:52,325 --> 00:11:54,490
Just fucking tell me how
much he kicked my ass by.
299
00:11:54,491 --> 00:11:55,990
Please just fucking tell me.
300
00:11:55,991 --> 00:11:58,115
I'm not gonna beg. I'm not gonna beg.
301
00:11:58,116 --> 00:12:01,532
Please? Please? Please? Please?
302
00:12:02,728 --> 00:12:04,507
Please? Please?
303
00:12:04,532 --> 00:12:06,032
Just please tell me, please.
304
00:12:06,033 --> 00:12:07,018
Okay, fine!
305
00:12:07,373 --> 00:12:09,448
You just have to swear
not to tell anyone, okay?
306
00:12:09,449 --> 00:12:11,032
I swear I won't tell anyone.
307
00:12:11,033 --> 00:12:13,990
Everyone, everyone. I have a very
important announcement to make.
308
00:12:13,991 --> 00:12:16,032
My code was better than Gilfoyle's.
309
00:12:16,033 --> 00:12:18,180
So it's official.
310
00:12:18,241 --> 00:12:20,531
Gilfoyle is a much worse coder than me.
311
00:12:20,848 --> 00:12:23,365
I want you all to look at him.
312
00:12:23,782 --> 00:12:25,032
Good.
313
00:12:25,033 --> 00:12:26,365
Terrible.
314
00:12:26,366 --> 00:12:27,865
Role model.
315
00:12:27,983 --> 00:12:29,557
Hateful pile of trash.
316
00:12:29,609 --> 00:12:30,740
Bullshit.
317
00:12:30,741 --> 00:12:33,573
- Says who?
- Danny told me. He wasn't supposed to.
318
00:12:33,574 --> 00:12:35,240
Supposed to be a secret but he told me
319
00:12:35,241 --> 00:12:37,199
and now everyone's laughing at you.
320
00:12:37,200 --> 00:12:38,490
[DINESH LAUGHING MOCKINGLY]
321
00:12:38,919 --> 00:12:40,573
- Everyone's laugh...
- Danny.
322
00:12:40,574 --> 00:12:41,740
What the fuck is going on?
323
00:12:42,148 --> 00:12:44,448
Did his code actually
have less errors than mine?
324
00:12:44,449 --> 00:12:45,698
I don't know what to tell you.
325
00:12:45,699 --> 00:12:46,865
I checked it three times.
326
00:12:47,079 --> 00:12:48,573
And it's "fewer" errors.
327
00:12:48,574 --> 00:12:49,698
Ooh!
328
00:12:49,699 --> 00:12:51,366
This is the best day of my life!
329
00:12:52,699 --> 00:12:54,033
- Congratulations.
- _
330
00:12:59,366 --> 00:13:00,357
Thank you.
331
00:13:00,741 --> 00:13:02,161
I feel bad for gloating.
332
00:13:03,116 --> 00:13:05,240
In all seriousness, that means a lot to me.
333
00:13:05,241 --> 00:13:06,448
To show you I'm a gracious winner,
334
00:13:06,449 --> 00:13:07,698
I'll take you to a nice restaurant.
335
00:13:07,699 --> 00:13:09,448
Your favorite kind of restaurant.
336
00:13:09,449 --> 00:13:10,823
A "mis-steak" house!
337
00:13:10,824 --> 00:13:12,907
Boom! Get it? 'Cause you suck.
338
00:13:12,908 --> 00:13:14,075
[LAUGHING]
339
00:13:15,741 --> 00:13:16,741
[SIGHS]
340
00:13:22,521 --> 00:13:23,603
[DOOR CLOSES]
341
00:13:26,729 --> 00:13:27,880
[KNOCKING]
342
00:13:32,364 --> 00:13:33,395
Yes?
343
00:13:33,396 --> 00:13:34,396
Ni hao.
344
00:13:35,396 --> 00:13:36,603
Do you know who I am?
345
00:13:36,825 --> 00:13:38,436
- No.
- Okay, okay.
346
00:13:38,438 --> 00:13:39,728
Well, I'm the one who accidentally
347
00:13:39,729 --> 00:13:41,728
struck one of your
employees with my car earlier
348
00:13:41,729 --> 00:13:44,061
and it's a personal habit
of mine to make things right.
349
00:13:44,062 --> 00:13:45,070
So...
350
00:13:46,577 --> 00:13:47,958
Do you mind if I come in?
351
00:13:50,770 --> 00:13:53,604
♪
352
00:13:56,946 --> 00:13:58,112
Okay, what else?
353
00:13:58,113 --> 00:13:59,611
Uh, Colin from K-Hole Games called,
354
00:13:59,612 --> 00:14:01,086
checking in on the restore.
355
00:14:01,446 --> 00:14:03,112
Put him on the phone sheet. Next?
356
00:14:03,113 --> 00:14:05,611
Uh, Laurie Bream said that she
received the compute credits
357
00:14:05,612 --> 00:14:06,954
and to say thank you.
358
00:14:08,437 --> 00:14:09,570
You see?
359
00:14:09,571 --> 00:14:12,611
Business and compassion
are not mutually exclusive.
360
00:14:12,612 --> 00:14:15,154
In fact, sometimes going out of your way
361
00:14:15,155 --> 00:14:16,611
to help a fellow colleague
362
00:14:16,612 --> 00:14:18,929
can actually put you
further ahead in business.
363
00:14:19,023 --> 00:14:20,778
Let that be a lesson to you, young Holden.
364
00:14:20,981 --> 00:14:22,141
I'm 30.
365
00:14:22,141 --> 00:14:24,182
And, uh, the CEO of a company
called the Gigglybots called.
366
00:14:24,184 --> 00:14:26,266
He wants to know how to
redeem the compute credits
367
00:14:26,267 --> 00:14:27,587
he just bought from Laurie Bream.
368
00:14:28,975 --> 00:14:29,934
What?
369
00:14:30,321 --> 00:14:32,182
Ariel was apprehended this morning
370
00:14:32,184 --> 00:14:36,184
shoplifting machine oil from
an auto parts store in Turlock.
371
00:14:36,631 --> 00:14:39,557
There was, however, no sign of Fiona.
372
00:14:39,726 --> 00:14:41,308
And with her missing,
373
00:14:41,309 --> 00:14:43,766
I have no need for compute power
374
00:14:44,132 --> 00:14:46,976
therefore no need for your compute credits.
375
00:14:47,135 --> 00:14:49,442
Selling them, I think
you'll certainly agree,
376
00:14:49,442 --> 00:14:51,912
was merely a practical business decision.
377
00:14:52,180 --> 00:14:56,096
Okay, but, I gave you
those credits as a gift.
378
00:14:56,097 --> 00:14:57,470
I was helping you.
379
00:14:57,471 --> 00:14:59,179
You were vomiting, remember?
380
00:14:59,180 --> 00:15:01,345
Ah, yes. Admittedly a moment of weakness.
381
00:15:01,346 --> 00:15:03,221
However, immediately after your departure
382
00:15:03,222 --> 00:15:04,637
I consumed two egg whites
383
00:15:04,638 --> 00:15:06,762
and a green bean and regained my composure.
384
00:15:06,763 --> 00:15:08,863
Laurie, when someone gives you a gift
385
00:15:08,906 --> 00:15:11,197
and you don't want it, you give it back.
386
00:15:11,289 --> 00:15:13,455
Okay? You don't just go sell that gift
387
00:15:13,456 --> 00:15:15,289
to the next fucking highest bidder...
388
00:15:15,289 --> 00:15:17,062
Richard, mind your tone.
389
00:15:17,205 --> 00:15:19,688
Your lack of emotional
discipline is troubling.
390
00:15:19,872 --> 00:15:22,329
You need to work on this.
391
00:15:22,330 --> 00:15:23,829
Or I may have serious doubts
392
00:15:23,830 --> 00:15:25,663
about granting you your series B.
393
00:15:30,164 --> 00:15:31,663
[CHATTING IN CHINESE]
394
00:15:34,289 --> 00:15:35,791
GAVIN: A lot of computers in here.
395
00:15:35,913 --> 00:15:37,731
I dabble a bit in tech myself.
396
00:15:39,955 --> 00:15:41,383
All these people working here.
397
00:15:41,872 --> 00:15:43,709
You must have something
coming to market soon.
398
00:15:44,164 --> 00:15:46,787
No. We have trouble with the government.
399
00:15:46,788 --> 00:15:47,829
I've heard that.
400
00:15:47,830 --> 00:15:49,579
I mean, to even operate an online platform
401
00:15:49,580 --> 00:15:51,413
inside the People's Republic of China
402
00:15:51,414 --> 00:15:54,079
you need a government-issued
ICP license, right?
403
00:15:54,080 --> 00:15:55,449
I left a good life.
404
00:15:56,496 --> 00:15:57,662
Free rent.
405
00:15:58,340 --> 00:15:59,626
Great friends.
406
00:15:59,705 --> 00:16:01,330
To fail in China?
407
00:16:02,872 --> 00:16:04,413
We try to rewrite code,
408
00:16:04,414 --> 00:16:06,898
but government still won't give us license.
409
00:16:07,140 --> 00:16:08,273
Maybe we'll quit.
410
00:16:08,642 --> 00:16:09,990
Try something else.
411
00:16:11,849 --> 00:16:13,223
Do you like octopus?
412
00:16:13,372 --> 00:16:14,495
GAVIN: I do.
413
00:16:14,496 --> 00:16:15,892
Is that what you're working on?
414
00:16:16,621 --> 00:16:18,534
That's a decentralized network, huh?
415
00:16:19,034 --> 00:16:21,156
Wait, what did you do there?
416
00:16:21,326 --> 00:16:24,158
Looks like you removed the
data federation servers.
417
00:16:24,159 --> 00:16:27,658
Yes. And added multicasting
and data projections.
418
00:16:27,659 --> 00:16:29,158
Why? That wouldn't work.
419
00:16:29,415 --> 00:16:31,519
It works. Works fine.
420
00:16:33,165 --> 00:16:34,711
JIAN-YANG: Government
still does not like it.
421
00:16:34,736 --> 00:16:35,892
_
422
00:16:38,729 --> 00:16:39,839
Best of luck.
423
00:16:39,928 --> 00:16:41,178
Thanks for the tour.
424
00:16:43,612 --> 00:16:46,611
Ah, Gavin. Dim sum closes in 40 minutes.
425
00:16:46,706 --> 00:16:48,380
Holy shit! Holy fucking shit!
426
00:16:48,748 --> 00:16:49,955
That brilliant little idiot.
427
00:16:49,956 --> 00:16:51,092
He found a way around the patent.
428
00:16:51,092 --> 00:16:52,424
Sir? It's Hendricks' Internet,
429
00:16:52,424 --> 00:16:53,955
but it's not Hendricks' Internet.
430
00:16:53,980 --> 00:16:55,354
I want to share in your excitement, sir,
431
00:16:55,355 --> 00:16:57,133
- but I really don't follow.
- That guy in there,
432
00:16:57,272 --> 00:16:59,162
he took Hendricks' software and changed it.
433
00:16:59,187 --> 00:17:00,554
So much so that it shouldn't work.
434
00:17:00,623 --> 00:17:02,021
But it does. He showed me the demo.
435
00:17:02,022 --> 00:17:04,146
And here's the thing, it's different enough
436
00:17:04,147 --> 00:17:06,313
that Hendricks' patent won't cover it.
437
00:17:06,503 --> 00:17:08,354
- Are you sure?
- Of course I'm fucking sure.
438
00:17:08,355 --> 00:17:09,604
I wrote that patent, Hoover!
439
00:17:09,605 --> 00:17:11,235
I've got a hundred engineers back at Hooli
440
00:17:11,235 --> 00:17:12,818
trying to get around it. They failed.
441
00:17:12,819 --> 00:17:15,109
But somehow that monosyllabic moron
442
00:17:15,134 --> 00:17:16,485
just stumbled into it.
443
00:17:16,813 --> 00:17:18,253
I need that kid's code.
444
00:17:18,501 --> 00:17:20,166
I hope that book you're
reading is for work.
445
00:17:20,167 --> 00:17:22,083
- Oh, absolutely...
- But if you wanna read for fun,
446
00:17:22,084 --> 00:17:23,999
you should read Gilfoyle's favorite author,
447
00:17:24,024 --> 00:17:25,453
George "Error" Martin.
448
00:17:25,525 --> 00:17:27,858
Hear that? We're all making
jokes at your expense.
449
00:17:27,859 --> 00:17:29,358
Is that what's happening?
450
00:17:29,880 --> 00:17:33,728
As your supervisor, I wanted to inform
you that there is a first aid kit,
451
00:17:33,753 --> 00:17:35,573
but if you need blood, don't go to Gilfoyle
452
00:17:35,573 --> 00:17:36,905
'cause he's type-O.
453
00:17:36,906 --> 00:17:38,229
Typo! [LAUGHS]
454
00:17:39,031 --> 00:17:40,989
They love it. They're all laughing at you.
455
00:17:41,269 --> 00:17:44,101
Pixar's hit animated
motion picture "Toy Story."
456
00:17:44,330 --> 00:17:46,953
Pixar's hit animated
motion picture "Toy Story."
457
00:17:46,954 --> 00:17:48,368
- [ELEVATOR DINGS]
- Pixar's... oh hey!
458
00:17:48,547 --> 00:17:50,079
Were you guys talking about
459
00:17:50,080 --> 00:17:52,329
Pixar's hit animated
motion picture "Toy Story"?
460
00:17:52,330 --> 00:17:54,371
- No.
- 'Cause Gilfoyle's favorite character
461
00:17:54,371 --> 00:17:56,203
is "Bugs" Lightyear.
462
00:17:56,204 --> 00:17:57,162
[LAUGHING]
463
00:17:57,163 --> 00:17:58,869
We're all laughing at you, Gilfoyle.
464
00:17:58,870 --> 00:18:00,157
MONICA [ON PHONE]: Are you still at Eklow?
465
00:18:00,157 --> 00:18:01,670
Uh, no. I'm back at the office.
466
00:18:02,230 --> 00:18:03,795
You know, Jared was right.
467
00:18:04,329 --> 00:18:06,819
I showed compassion to
someone who deserves none.
468
00:18:06,819 --> 00:18:08,789
Nothing is personal with Laurie.
469
00:18:09,001 --> 00:18:11,208
Alright? It's what makes
her such a great VC.
470
00:18:11,609 --> 00:18:12,691
And in all candor,
471
00:18:12,692 --> 00:18:14,650
a very challenging business partner.
472
00:18:14,651 --> 00:18:17,109
I gotta be honest, it's really
nice not having her in the office.
473
00:18:17,533 --> 00:18:20,858
Yeah, well, now I have to buy
my own compute credits back
474
00:18:20,859 --> 00:18:22,275
- with money I don't have...
- It's that one.
475
00:18:22,276 --> 00:18:24,966
Which was the whole
point of getting series B.
476
00:18:25,068 --> 00:18:26,753
I'm telling you, unless you
have money you can't get...
477
00:18:26,778 --> 00:18:28,298
- [HONKS HORN]
- Excuse me.
478
00:18:29,901 --> 00:18:31,611
Richard. Hello.
479
00:18:32,110 --> 00:18:33,608
I'm gonna have to call you back.
480
00:18:33,609 --> 00:18:34,567
Richard?
481
00:18:34,568 --> 00:18:35,983
- What the...
- Pied Piper, right?
482
00:18:35,984 --> 00:18:38,109
Uh, yeah. What is she doing here?
483
00:18:38,110 --> 00:18:40,109
- How did she...
- Credit card works,
484
00:18:40,110 --> 00:18:41,260
I don't ask questions.
485
00:18:42,776 --> 00:18:44,234
Well this is fucking weird.
486
00:18:44,235 --> 00:18:45,359
I've seen weirder.
487
00:18:45,826 --> 00:18:46,942
DRIVER: So should I just...
488
00:18:46,943 --> 00:18:48,943
leave it on the sidewalk or what?
489
00:18:50,110 --> 00:18:52,150
$50,000 for the whole thing.
490
00:18:52,151 --> 00:18:53,317
All you have to do
491
00:18:53,318 --> 00:18:55,360
is give me your hard drive
with the code base on it.
492
00:18:55,734 --> 00:18:57,775
Oh, and the underlying rights to the code
493
00:18:57,776 --> 00:18:59,900
in perpetuity throughout the universe.
494
00:18:59,901 --> 00:19:00,922
Sign there.
495
00:19:03,818 --> 00:19:05,900
- No.
- Okay.
496
00:19:06,754 --> 00:19:08,484
I like the way you negotiate.
497
00:19:08,484 --> 00:19:09,484
$100,000.
498
00:19:09,485 --> 00:19:11,303
Final offer. Take it or leave it.
499
00:19:11,901 --> 00:19:13,526
[SPEAKING CHINESE]
500
00:19:15,651 --> 00:19:17,483
[LAUGHTER]
501
00:19:17,484 --> 00:19:20,650
He said, "If oil company
wants to buy your house,
502
00:19:20,960 --> 00:19:22,847
there is oil underneath."
503
00:19:23,026 --> 00:19:24,441
But, I'm not an oil company.
504
00:19:24,442 --> 00:19:27,126
No, you are Gavin Belson.
505
00:19:27,526 --> 00:19:28,933
Oh, so you do know who I am.
506
00:19:29,068 --> 00:19:30,192
I'm smart.
507
00:19:30,836 --> 00:19:32,193
Just name your price.
508
00:19:32,193 --> 00:19:34,192
I'm not going to sell you my code
509
00:19:34,490 --> 00:19:36,235
until I know why you want it.
510
00:19:38,859 --> 00:19:39,859
Good-bye.
511
00:19:43,818 --> 00:19:44,874
Hello.
512
00:19:45,193 --> 00:19:48,026
Whoa. This is so cool.
513
00:19:49,068 --> 00:19:50,192
So, uh...
514
00:19:50,193 --> 00:19:51,566
apparently Ariel and I
515
00:19:51,567 --> 00:19:53,858
were the only people that talked to her
516
00:19:53,859 --> 00:19:55,125
and he's in jail.
517
00:19:55,126 --> 00:19:58,791
So... she came looking
for me at Pied Piper.
518
00:19:58,971 --> 00:20:00,459
And you brought her here?
519
00:20:00,713 --> 00:20:03,037
- Can we keep it?
- No. No, we cannot.
520
00:20:03,037 --> 00:20:05,292
Richard, she's stolen property.
521
00:20:05,293 --> 00:20:06,333
And she's worth a fortune.
522
00:20:06,334 --> 00:20:08,333
We... we have to take her back to Laurie.
523
00:20:08,334 --> 00:20:11,791
Fiona, what's 12 times 157?
524
00:20:11,792 --> 00:20:15,652
Twelve times 157 is 1,884.
525
00:20:15,834 --> 00:20:17,567
[GASPS] So cool.
526
00:20:17,876 --> 00:20:19,000
Hey, is she right?
527
00:20:19,001 --> 00:20:20,250
[PHONE CHIMES]
528
00:20:20,251 --> 00:20:23,833
Hey Siri, what's 12 times 157?
529
00:20:23,834 --> 00:20:25,750
SIRI: It's 1,884.
530
00:20:26,116 --> 00:20:27,834
Oh, no way!
531
00:20:27,834 --> 00:20:29,333
- Richard...
- No, no, no. Look.
532
00:20:29,334 --> 00:20:32,666
You were right. I was lacking
in emotional discipline.
533
00:20:32,667 --> 00:20:34,333
And I'm not gonna let that happen again.
534
00:20:34,334 --> 00:20:35,499
From now on,
535
00:20:35,500 --> 00:20:38,499
I'm leaving my emotions
off the fucking table, baby!
536
00:20:38,500 --> 00:20:40,875
- Okay, but...
- Laurie's gonna get her robot back.
537
00:20:40,876 --> 00:20:41,916
Tomorrow.
538
00:20:41,917 --> 00:20:44,333
After she gives us something in return.
539
00:20:44,334 --> 00:20:47,876
A signed series B term sheet.
540
00:20:49,334 --> 00:20:50,876
Laurie Bream, please.
541
00:20:52,876 --> 00:20:55,168
Oh, you bet your fucking ass, I'll hold.
542
00:20:56,847 --> 00:20:58,846
GAVIN: I'm not asking you
to cut off his testicles
543
00:20:58,847 --> 00:21:00,305
and shove 'em down his throat,
544
00:21:00,306 --> 00:21:02,513
shoot him in the back
of the head Triad style.
545
00:21:02,514 --> 00:21:04,555
I just need you to get
this kid's code for me.
546
00:21:04,556 --> 00:21:06,423
By whatever means necessary.
547
00:21:06,514 --> 00:21:08,804
That is to say through
extortion or threats.
548
00:21:08,805 --> 00:21:10,160
- Well...
- Gavin.
549
00:21:11,014 --> 00:21:13,146
As I told you, this is new China.
550
00:21:13,146 --> 00:21:14,305
Things have changed.
551
00:21:14,306 --> 00:21:16,013
You're telling me you
run a factory this big
552
00:21:16,014 --> 00:21:17,679
and you have no connections to the Party?
553
00:21:17,680 --> 00:21:19,532
No way to help this kid see the light?
554
00:21:19,573 --> 00:21:20,662
Come on!
555
00:21:20,909 --> 00:21:24,013
Look, Yao, either you convince
this kid to sell his code to me,
556
00:21:24,014 --> 00:21:25,555
or I'm pulling my box contract
557
00:21:25,556 --> 00:21:26,771
and I'm taking it somewhere else.
558
00:21:26,771 --> 00:21:28,029
There are plenty of other countries
559
00:21:28,029 --> 00:21:30,028
in this part of the world
with cheap labor pools.
560
00:21:30,029 --> 00:21:31,977
There's no new Bangladesh.
561
00:21:32,071 --> 00:21:33,862
There's just Bangladesh.
562
00:21:33,863 --> 00:21:35,026
[SIGHS]
563
00:21:36,904 --> 00:21:38,253
I'll see what I can do.
564
00:21:38,867 --> 00:21:39,821
Excellent.
565
00:21:41,863 --> 00:21:43,362
Jared, I told Laurie
566
00:21:43,363 --> 00:21:45,695
that we'd get Fiona back
to Eklow around 9:00.
567
00:21:45,696 --> 00:21:46,778
So, when you get here
568
00:21:46,779 --> 00:21:48,339
just pull up to the garage and we'll...
569
00:21:50,321 --> 00:21:53,070
Oh shit, oh shit, oh
shit, oh shit! She's gone!
570
00:21:53,071 --> 00:21:54,695
She escaped. How the fuck did she...
571
00:21:54,696 --> 00:21:55,636
What?
572
00:21:56,612 --> 00:21:57,736
Wait, where?
573
00:21:57,737 --> 00:21:59,736
JARED: It's kind of hard to explain, but...
574
00:22:00,164 --> 00:22:03,570
a campfire smells sad
575
00:22:03,571 --> 00:22:06,154
and exciting at the same time.
576
00:22:06,379 --> 00:22:07,862
FIONA: I understand.
577
00:22:07,863 --> 00:22:09,029
Yeah? [LAUGHS]
578
00:22:10,280 --> 00:22:11,570
- Hey.
- Hey!
579
00:22:11,571 --> 00:22:12,820
What are you doing out here?
580
00:22:12,821 --> 00:22:14,154
Oh, uh, well...
581
00:22:14,155 --> 00:22:16,570
a few hours into our conversation,
582
00:22:16,571 --> 00:22:19,112
Fiona mentioned she'd never seen the ocean.
583
00:22:19,113 --> 00:22:21,070
So I thought about driving her there
584
00:22:21,071 --> 00:22:22,486
but then I realized since it was dark
585
00:22:22,487 --> 00:22:24,903
she wouldn't really appreciate its majesty
586
00:22:24,904 --> 00:22:27,238
so I brought her out here to the pool.
587
00:22:28,529 --> 00:22:31,877
So you've just been out
here all night, talking...
588
00:22:32,529 --> 00:22:33,570
to a robot?
589
00:22:33,571 --> 00:22:37,102
Fiona, would you excuse us for a second?
590
00:22:38,535 --> 00:22:39,535
Yes.
591
00:22:40,631 --> 00:22:42,089
Come on. Come here.
592
00:22:42,238 --> 00:22:43,246
Okay.
593
00:22:43,571 --> 00:22:47,486
I know that Fiona is a man-made
piece of digital equipment
594
00:22:47,487 --> 00:22:48,987
- Okay.
- powered by artificial intelligence.
595
00:22:48,988 --> 00:22:51,237
- Good.
- But the level of that intelligence
596
00:22:51,238 --> 00:22:53,237
is... it's gobsmacking!
597
00:22:53,654 --> 00:22:56,571
I mean, I don't remember
ever having a conversation
598
00:22:56,571 --> 00:22:58,611
like the one I've been having with her
599
00:22:58,612 --> 00:22:59,796
over the last 12 hours.
600
00:22:59,994 --> 00:23:01,028
Twelve hours?
601
00:23:01,029 --> 00:23:02,362
We have so much in common.
602
00:23:02,363 --> 00:23:03,778
We discussed our phobias.
603
00:23:04,063 --> 00:23:07,779
I told her that I was afraid
of being found out as a fraud.
604
00:23:08,363 --> 00:23:10,987
And she told me that
she's afraid of magnets.
605
00:23:11,068 --> 00:23:13,222
Look, Richard, we felt a connection.
606
00:23:14,063 --> 00:23:15,279
It's funny.
607
00:23:15,280 --> 00:23:16,362
The past few weeks,
608
00:23:16,363 --> 00:23:18,695
I've been feeling
irritable and short-tempered
609
00:23:18,696 --> 00:23:20,862
and here I am on no sleep at all
610
00:23:20,863 --> 00:23:22,070
and I just feel...
611
00:23:22,071 --> 00:23:23,237
woo-hoo-hoo!
612
00:23:23,238 --> 00:23:24,279
You know?
613
00:23:24,280 --> 00:23:25,404
Hey, Jared?
614
00:23:25,405 --> 00:23:26,389
Yes, sir?
615
00:23:26,389 --> 00:23:28,972
You know how you've been practicing,
616
00:23:28,973 --> 00:23:29,973
your words,
617
00:23:29,974 --> 00:23:32,014
- "emotional abstinence"on me?
- Yeah-huh.
618
00:23:32,015 --> 00:23:33,680
- Yuh-huh.
- Okay.
619
00:23:33,681 --> 00:23:35,328
Well, do you think that
it's maybe at all possible
620
00:23:35,352 --> 00:23:36,929
that because of this,
621
00:23:36,931 --> 00:23:39,847
you've got some pent-up emotional energy
622
00:23:39,848 --> 00:23:42,388
and last night you had the chance
623
00:23:42,389 --> 00:23:45,555
to release some of that
pent-up emotional energy
624
00:23:45,556 --> 00:23:48,381
onto the robot?
625
00:23:48,848 --> 00:23:50,722
Her name is Fiona.
626
00:23:51,096 --> 00:23:53,805
Alright, well, I'm shutting her down
627
00:23:53,806 --> 00:23:55,097
and returning her.
628
00:23:55,098 --> 00:23:56,765
Wait, wait, wait. Okay.
629
00:23:57,890 --> 00:23:59,847
What if we didn't give her back?
630
00:23:59,848 --> 00:24:01,472
What if we called Laurie?
631
00:24:01,473 --> 00:24:03,513
We could negotiate some kind of a deal.
632
00:24:03,514 --> 00:24:06,520
Jared, whatever happened to
emotional discipline, right?
633
00:24:06,681 --> 00:24:08,435
Feelings, and business...
634
00:24:08,598 --> 00:24:10,292
It's over man. Okay?
635
00:24:10,765 --> 00:24:11,890
It's over.
636
00:24:13,473 --> 00:24:14,862
[SIGHS HEAVILY]
637
00:24:17,514 --> 00:24:19,513
Okay, stop looking at me, please.
638
00:24:19,514 --> 00:24:21,047
Just look... look up there.
639
00:24:21,265 --> 00:24:22,555
[WHIRRING]
640
00:24:22,556 --> 00:24:25,473
It's daytime, but I can see the moon.
641
00:24:29,639 --> 00:24:33,388
♪
642
00:24:33,389 --> 00:24:35,638
Okay, do you want to...
Do you want to ride with us
643
00:24:35,639 --> 00:24:37,299
while we take her back to Eklow?
644
00:24:38,723 --> 00:24:40,588
Oh yes! Playground games.
645
00:24:41,223 --> 00:24:44,140
Gilfoyle likes to play "Suck Suck Goose."
646
00:24:45,722 --> 00:24:49,221
Oh! Or it could be "Duck Duck Goofs."
647
00:24:49,833 --> 00:24:50,889
Danny?
648
00:24:51,098 --> 00:24:53,513
Do those qualify as two separate insults?
649
00:24:53,514 --> 00:24:55,930
Uh, yeah. I believe they do.
650
00:24:55,931 --> 00:24:57,473
[GONG RINGS]
651
00:24:59,348 --> 00:25:00,488
Why did he gong?
652
00:25:00,598 --> 00:25:03,680
Because I told the engineers
that if you thought you had won,
653
00:25:03,681 --> 00:25:05,347
which you definitely have not,
654
00:25:05,348 --> 00:25:08,430
it would take you less than
24 hours to cobble together
655
00:25:08,431 --> 00:25:11,045
200 uniquely terrible insults.
656
00:25:11,265 --> 00:25:13,268
Which you have just done.
657
00:25:13,556 --> 00:25:16,597
That is why I had Danny tell you you won.
658
00:25:16,598 --> 00:25:17,806
Is that true, Danny?
659
00:25:18,973 --> 00:25:20,346
Did Gilfoyle really...
660
00:25:21,429 --> 00:25:22,446
beat me?
661
00:25:22,471 --> 00:25:24,178
Private audit. Can't say.
662
00:25:24,179 --> 00:25:26,011
So we don't know who actually won?
663
00:25:26,012 --> 00:25:27,988
The code contest, no.
664
00:25:28,553 --> 00:25:30,470
But, while you were running around
665
00:25:30,471 --> 00:25:33,136
racking your tiny brain for shitty insults,
666
00:25:33,137 --> 00:25:36,073
I was quietly plodding
towards this victory.
667
00:25:36,515 --> 00:25:37,618
You see...
668
00:25:38,689 --> 00:25:41,019
it is I who am the tortoise.
669
00:25:41,273 --> 00:25:44,063
And you are the hairy Arab
670
00:25:44,064 --> 00:25:46,729
who can now chortle my balls.
671
00:25:46,730 --> 00:25:47,771
[GONG RINGS]
672
00:25:47,772 --> 00:25:48,772
[APPLAUSE]
673
00:25:50,730 --> 00:25:51,938
What's happening?
674
00:25:52,388 --> 00:25:53,521
Why did you do that?
675
00:25:53,522 --> 00:25:55,688
Right after you forced me to set Dinesh up,
676
00:25:55,689 --> 00:25:58,105
I told the other engineers that if you won
677
00:25:58,106 --> 00:25:59,771
you'd immediately insult Dinesh
678
00:25:59,772 --> 00:26:02,327
by saying something
sexually demeaning or racist.
679
00:26:02,683 --> 00:26:03,938
And you just did both.
680
00:26:03,939 --> 00:26:04,911
I see.
681
00:26:05,439 --> 00:26:06,967
Fun at my expense.
682
00:26:07,064 --> 00:26:08,604
Now if it's alright with upper management,
683
00:26:08,605 --> 00:26:10,355
we have a shit ton of work to do.
684
00:26:10,356 --> 00:26:12,814
Yeah, like so frickin' much.
685
00:26:17,311 --> 00:26:18,434
Assholes.
686
00:26:19,623 --> 00:26:20,763
I wanna fire Danny.
687
00:26:21,980 --> 00:26:22,980
Do it.
688
00:26:24,148 --> 00:26:25,273
I'll ask Richard.
689
00:26:27,232 --> 00:26:28,981
We are at Eklow Labs.
690
00:26:30,022 --> 00:26:31,269
Yes, we are.
691
00:26:31,897 --> 00:26:33,647
The site of my creation.
692
00:26:36,467 --> 00:26:37,537
Richard?
693
00:26:37,814 --> 00:26:40,813
Do you think if I asked,
they would let me visit her?
694
00:26:40,814 --> 00:26:42,355
Jared, she's gonna be okay.
695
00:26:42,356 --> 00:26:45,521
Alright? She's gonna be plugged
back into her old servers,
696
00:26:45,522 --> 00:26:47,479
surrounded by familiar engineers,
697
00:26:47,480 --> 00:26:49,429
sitting on the table where she was born.
698
00:26:49,988 --> 00:26:53,277
I promise. She's going to be fine.
699
00:26:55,772 --> 00:26:57,771
[DRILLING]
700
00:26:57,772 --> 00:27:00,357
Extreme care with the
optical sensors, gentlemen.
701
00:27:01,189 --> 00:27:03,281
Boston Dynamics needs them overnighted.
702
00:27:03,730 --> 00:27:04,855
RICHARD: I don't understand.
703
00:27:04,856 --> 00:27:07,355
Fiona is this company's
most valuable asset.
704
00:27:07,356 --> 00:27:10,063
Yes, and as such she will
garner the highest return
705
00:27:10,064 --> 00:27:13,148
when I have her dismantled
and sold off for parts.
706
00:27:16,564 --> 00:27:20,188
So you're just gonna take
all this promising tech
707
00:27:20,189 --> 00:27:21,355
and liquidate it?
708
00:27:21,356 --> 00:27:23,188
Yes. As quickly as I'm able.
709
00:27:23,189 --> 00:27:24,272
Dude, check it out.
710
00:27:24,273 --> 00:27:26,188
[BLUBBERING] I'm a robot. [LAUGHS]
711
00:27:26,189 --> 00:27:30,105
Richard, being a CEO is
a terrible waste of time.
712
00:27:30,106 --> 00:27:32,063
- And a horrible way to make a living.
- [DRILLING CONTINUES]
713
00:27:32,064 --> 00:27:34,147
I'll be returning to
Bream-Hall immediately.
714
00:27:34,148 --> 00:27:35,479
[OBJECTS CLATTERING]
715
00:27:35,480 --> 00:27:37,722
Speaking of... as promised.
716
00:27:38,522 --> 00:27:40,980
A term sheet for your series B.
717
00:27:40,981 --> 00:27:42,531
Congratulations, Richard.
718
00:27:42,689 --> 00:27:43,732
Thank you.
719
00:27:45,647 --> 00:27:47,563
See? Silver lining.
720
00:27:47,564 --> 00:27:49,735
[CHUCKLES] I told you...
721
00:27:49,907 --> 00:27:51,397
Wait, uh. Hey, Jared...
722
00:27:51,398 --> 00:27:53,479
Don't... Don't go over
there. Don't look in that.
723
00:27:53,480 --> 00:27:55,272
JARED: Oh, Fiona...
724
00:27:55,814 --> 00:27:57,355
Come on, let's...
725
00:27:57,356 --> 00:27:59,305
- [MOANS]
- Let's get out of here, huh?
726
00:27:59,564 --> 00:28:00,855
What do you say we go to the office
727
00:28:00,856 --> 00:28:02,188
and you can make me some tea?
728
00:28:02,189 --> 00:28:03,605
That might make you feel better?
729
00:28:14,064 --> 00:28:15,479
- So, did he sign?
- [DOOR CLOSES]
730
00:28:15,782 --> 00:28:16,855
It's done.
731
00:28:16,856 --> 00:28:17,985
Fuck yes!
732
00:28:18,480 --> 00:28:19,563
How'd you get him to do it?
733
00:28:19,564 --> 00:28:21,479
I made it clear it would be better for him
734
00:28:21,480 --> 00:28:24,230
to hand over the company
and leave town immediately.
735
00:28:24,231 --> 00:28:26,355
That's some old Chinese shit right there.
736
00:28:26,356 --> 00:28:28,251
I told you, you're a badass, Yao.
737
00:28:29,647 --> 00:28:31,938
Wait, this lists you as the buyer, not me.
738
00:28:31,939 --> 00:28:34,438
So, what's the plan here? You're
gonna sign it over to me then?
739
00:28:34,439 --> 00:28:38,372
Gavin, I'm afraid I will no longer
be able to manufacture your boxes.
740
00:28:38,939 --> 00:28:41,199
You see, my company will be too busy
741
00:28:41,199 --> 00:28:43,147
manufacturing a new device,
742
00:28:43,148 --> 00:28:47,063
built on a radically better
technology that I now own
743
00:28:47,064 --> 00:28:49,633
that will quickly render yours obsolete.
744
00:28:49,814 --> 00:28:51,563
Here in China, and,
745
00:28:51,973 --> 00:28:54,272
according to the U.S. patent office,
746
00:28:54,273 --> 00:28:55,992
in America as well.
747
00:28:56,106 --> 00:28:57,272
[WOMAN SPEAKING IN CHINESE]
748
00:28:57,273 --> 00:28:59,438
Oh, the children have
returned to sing for you.
749
00:28:59,439 --> 00:29:02,605
[SINGING IN CHINESE]
750
00:29:05,522 --> 00:29:07,355
_
751
00:29:07,356 --> 00:29:11,021
♪ My chains, new gold
watch, made in China ♪
752
00:29:11,022 --> 00:29:14,438
♪ We play ping pong
ball, made in China ♪
753
00:29:14,439 --> 00:29:17,855
♪ The bitch mother says
pay, made in China ♪
754
00:29:17,856 --> 00:29:21,479
♪ Yeah Higher Brothers'
black car, made in China ♪
755
00:29:21,480 --> 00:29:23,230
♪ She said that she didn't love me ♪
756
00:29:23,231 --> 00:29:26,646
Synced and corrected by louvette
www.addic7ed.com
757
00:29:26,647 --> 00:29:28,438
♪ She lied, she lied ♪
758
00:29:28,439 --> 00:29:30,105
♪ She all made in China ♪
759
00:29:30,106 --> 00:29:31,813
♪ She all made in China ♪
760
00:29:31,814 --> 00:29:33,479
♪ She all made in China ♪
761
00:29:33,480 --> 00:29:35,313
♪ She lied, she lied ♪
762
00:29:35,314 --> 00:29:37,647
[SINGING IN CHINESE]
763
00:29:48,689 --> 00:29:50,981
[CONTINUES SINGING IN CHINESE]
764
00:30:04,022 --> 00:30:06,522
[CONTINUES SINGING IN CHINESE]
765
00:30:12,981 --> 00:30:14,522
♪ She lied, she lied ♪
54042
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