Original subtitles

That's How We Do It Letters to INGE and STEN

A documentary by TORGNY WICKMAN

Inge and Sten Hegeler are significant sex gurus of our time.

They are known in the whole world for numerous pioneering books

such as The XYZ of Love,

which has been translated into many languages

and is considered groundbreaking in modern sexology.

Inge and Sten Hegeler are Danes, but they also speak Swedish.

During their free time, they live in Lilia Hyltan,

in the middle of the dark woods of Smaland.

Here, to the calm and cosiness of the little cottage,

is where they escape from Copenhagen to work and relax.

Marianne, it's tea time.

-How would you like your egg? -Soft-boiled, please.

Would you like an egg?

Thank you.

Here is an article about a person who doesn't want to be admitted to the hospital

to be cured, but who would prefer to die for religious reasons.

It makes me think of that letter from that religious lady

who wrote that there are two types of sane people.

The ones who have found God, and the ones who are still looking.

It does sound a bit intolerant to us who believe in other things.

But on the other hand,

if you believe that our lives here on Earth

last for only a second, after which comes eternity,

then I guess sickness and healing,

just like sex technique and sex education, which is what we specialise in,

are of less importance.

But I think our lives here on Earth are important for everybody.

I'm the first to admit

that we also tend to generalise, but how can we avoid that?

I thought that instead of talking about problems, we could discuss

all the letters we receive from people who have had

positive experiences, something positive to tell,

something that is not problematic.

Yes, I also think that we have neglected that area.

Perhaps we should find letters from

someone who has found something positive,

something that we can learn from

and be inspired by.

For example, being able to play together.

Yes, play together,

but not in the sense that one person tries to force his or her way of playing,

his or her way of living. Both can decide.

I think we have a letter that we can say

is a good example of what you're saying.

Dear Inge and Sten,

We are both about 25 years old and have been married for eight years.

I don't think our sex life is worse off than other couples in our situation,

but I want to tell you how we, in a very simple way,

managed to freshen up and revitalise our sex life.

We found a way to play.

We have something we call "Deciding Day" once a week.

That day, one of us decides exactly what we should do sexually.

We have a cure for everything.

Turn around.

There we go. We will take care of this.

-Is this good? -Yes. Thank you, Doctor.

Come this way.

Come here. Please sit down. You may lie down.

One day, my husband decided

that we'd pretend he was a gynaecologist,

and that I was a shy, young girl

seeing a gynaecologist for the first time.

The examination room was in our living room,

and the examination table consisted of a low table and two chairs.

The doctor who examined me was very kind.

I had a towel wrapped around me when I came in,

and it was very exciting when my husband, wearing a lab coat,

slowly pulled down the towel to reveal my genitals.

Here is something.

-Do you feel this? -Yes.

-And this? -Yes, Doctor.

-Should we remove this? -No, no.

-Is this good, then? -Yes. It's very nice, Doctor.

-Is it nice? -Yes.

-More like this? -Yes, more.

It's a wonderful feeling

to lay there blindfolded

and feel the doctor's soft fingers massage my clitoris.

And it doesn't take long before I have a violent orgasm.

Sometimes my husband ends up playing along.

He is completely naked under the white coat,

and it is absolutely wonderful.

It's so nice, Doctor.

Thank you so much, Doctor.

Another day, I got to decide,

and I wanted my husband to paint my genitals

with a Japanese sable brush,

dipped in oil and warm water.

The brushes are very expensive. They cost about 80 crowns,

but one should not settle for anything less

since it's an exceptional pleasure

to feel the soft hairs against your clitoris and labia when they slowly swell

and redden as the excitement rises.

A third thing we do, which was my husband's idea,

is that he wears a blindfold, and we play blind man's bluff.

I try to arouse him in different ways, and it's usually not very difficult.

In these very simple ways and with these very simple games,

we have managed to revitalise our sex life.

We wanted to share this with you.

That is how you can play if you are two.

But many people are single.

This is an important problem.

We get hundreds of letters from people who are alone.

Their sexual needs and desires are stronger than that of a couple's.

In this case,

the girl has a homosexual tendency

but that isn't strong enough for her to have had any homosexual encounters.

This ambivalence between wanting and doing

is something frequently addressed in letters.

In other words, instead of doing something

that could cause complications and difficulties,

and also break the law in some cases, one settles for a game.

Dear Inge and Sten,

I'm a single girl with rather strong homosexual desires,

but I have never had the courage to do anything about it.

Instead, I play a game

in which I get a wig and a doll's head from a store.

Then I strip in front of the doll's head

and fantasise that it is my girlfriend who is in love with me.

I let the doll kiss my breasts,

or I masturbate with her lips, and we have the most wonderful exchange.

For people who live and work in Copenhagen,

and who were born in Denmark,

where plains and farming are omnipresent,

it's relaxing, mysterious and secretive to live in a cottage in the middle of Smaland.

They have tried to keep it primitive, simple and natural

without interfering with their own lifestyle.

-There. -My go.

Sten is a city man and he has learnt how to swing the scythe

as farmers did in the past.

The Hegelers have two children.

What decides the life rhythm here at Lilia Hyltan

is the combination of work and rest.

Every day, a large number of letters arrive from all over the world,

letters that have to be answered.

-Sten? -Yes?

Anything in the post today?

Do you remember

when we talked about being distracted when you have sex?

Here is a letter that talks about that.

Dear Inge and Sten,

I am 28 years old and have not had any problems with my sex life.

About a year ago, I fell in love with a girl,

and after a couple of months, we moved in together.

Everything was fine, except for the sex.

It was hard to get my fiancée started.

I kept quiet and suffered since she, in so many other ways,

was my ideal woman.

She had a lot of intellectual interests

and was fond of listening to poetry.

The Lovers' Lament.

"The maple awaits spring

"It's going to come again and water its root

"But our love's glow shall, with the years, stifle in soot

"My dear, please disagree"

And disagree, she does.

For a while, I thought that the wine and goodies

that usually work on women would also work on my girlfriend,

but I was wrong.

She didn't mind the Mosel wine and the smoked salmon at all,

but when I tried to come closer,

it was impossible, as usual.

Don't!

But one day, luck was on my side, and that's what I want to tell you

because it might help other couples in similar situations.

My girlfriend is very fond of pop music,

and she likes it very loud.

I got her some headphones

so that the neighbours wouldn't be disturbed.

Lo and behold! When she closed out the outside world

and remained concentrated,

she said that she encountered a symphony of colours

with the music roaring in her ears.

At the same time, the sexual desire awoke.

I was quick to take advantage of this.

I made special arrangements with the headphones

so I could move her to the bedroom.

And while Margit is in another world,

I can't expect her to talk to me when we make love.

But on the other hand, her absence

gives me freer hands to experiment during intercourse.

Inge and Sten,

I hope that my fiancée's experience with the headphones can help other people.

I'm thinking, in particular, of people who live in houses that are not soundproof

and who have a hard time finding peace and concentration.

This is fundamental for a successful and happy sex life.

I'm going in. Are you coming?

It's a bit windy, isn't it?

Yes, but it will be nice.

Inge and Sten Hegeler live as they learn,

openly, naturally, naked, freely

and in deep harmony with their children.

The pool is not big,

but it gives coolness on a hot summer's day.

It's not a problem keeping clean this way, is it?

No. I feel sorry for women

who complain about their men being dirty.

The dirty men Inge and Sten are talking about might be a problem.

But in this case, it's something completely different,

namely the joy of cleanliness and what that can bring.

We have a letter in which a young married couple discuss this.

Dear Inge and Sten,

My husband and I have not been married that long,

no longer than eight months, to be exact.

Don't think that what I'm about to tell you is because we are tired of each other,

or that the lust has faded

as can happen with couples who have been married for a long time.

On the contrary, we really like each other,

but we have made up this game to make our sex life even more enjoyable.

We have a modern bathroom, but we fix up our living room for bathing

probably once a week.

We use a large tub and bowls with hot water on a bath rug,

and then we wash each other slowly, softly and smoothly,

all over, especially our genitals.

-Do you like it like this, darling? -Very much, darling.

Do you want to switch?

I think it's so exciting and so arousing that I almost tremble

when my husband starts to wash my breasts.

The soap and hot water make his touch so soft

that I get incredibly aroused.

When we have sex after the washing and drying,

I can climax three or four times.

Here is something that might be surprising to Inge and Sten's millions of readers,

the Hegeler family completely naked.

-I'll get the suntan lotion for you. -Yes.

I'll dry you.

Can you dry my back, please?

That's lovely.

When Sten finishes applying suntan lotion after the swim,

they come to think about a very funny letter they received some weeks ago.

It's about a technical tip

which has been successfully used in the Orient for over a thousand years.

Be careful not to spill oil on the mattress.

Yeah, we can't change the sheets.

Dear Inge and Sten,

My husband is 35 and I'm 28.

We have been married for almost 10 years.

-Bye, I'm leaving. -Bye.

-Are you changing the sheets? -Yes, I'm cleaning today.

I guess the office has to wait an hour or so.

We have noticed how his colleagues' marriages and our friends' marriages

start to fall apart right around 10 years.

That's why we have this amusing sex game.

We have a cotton mattress cover which we wash with the sheets.

We remove the pillows and the duvet.

What we do is have what you could call an oil intercourse.

We use oil or moisturiser to rub each others' bodies.

It's difficult not to make a mess

so we choose the day when we're changing the sheets.

We use oil in a small cup

or a greasy moisturiser that makes the skin smooth and slippery.

We apply the oil all over our bodies but mostly around the genitals and nipples.

When the entire body is lubricated, it's more sensitive,

so you get an enormous sense of lust almost everywhere on the body.

I can climax many times in a row

just by sitting on my husband's thigh

and slowly sliding back and forth.

In other words, we have expanded the erogenous zones

to the entire body.

This way of having intercourse

is much softer and smoother than the usual way.

Most of all, it allows us not to rush to climax.

Because it's more fun, we make it last.

It's not even necessary for my husband

to have an erection the entire time,

which could be something to keep in mind for people with this kind of problem.

It's vacation time,

but the Hegelers still have work to do.

Sten, for example, has to tend to his very peculiar potato patch

in the middle of the lawn,

and get potatoes to dinner.

Inge has to read letters from her readers,

and think about the answers as she cooks dinner.

It's one of those letters that they discuss here,

before the associations lead us to the next example.

You know what I thought about when I was inside?

That young couple.

It makes you think that young people have more problems today.

But I don't think it's like that. I think it's more...

How should I put it? They are more attentive to

the fact that you need to invest yourself to have a good relationship.

-Don't you agree? -It's a matter of loyalty.

Exactly. And when you talk about loyalty,

it's very difficult to tell the other person

about past experiences, and that's how you can hurt

one another if you don't agree on what you want to do.

I think you are right about that.

-Sten? -Yes?

This makes me think of the couple who liked to walk in the woods. Remember?

-In rubber boots, in the rain? -I sure do.

Dear Inge and Sten,

My wife, Lisa, and I had not known each other for very long

when we discovered that we both liked to make love outdoors.

Soon, we became experts on finding good places.

Lisa likes rain,

but it's hard to find in the winter,

so we just moved into our bathroom.

We figured out that it was the rubber boots and the rubber coats

that aroused us.

There is something sensual and exciting about the shiny black rubber

that I just can't explain.

We are in our bathroom, showering with the raincoats on,

and we think it's the most fantastic experience

to hear the dripping against the rubber and the hard, warm water from the shower.

We only do this during foreplay.

When we are aroused, we continue like everybody else.

It's a bit strange, this rubber

and the rubber interest.

They exist in many different shapes and forms,

and quite a few people are interested in rubber,

and we don't really know where it comes from.

Do you think it's a perversion?

No, I don't like that word.

I don't like the word "perversion."

I would only call it a serious sexual disorder

if it is the only way that you can have fun.

You mean that you only play on one key

when the whole keyboard is available.

That's true. And isn't it also true

that in the cases that we have seen and heard about,

it's all about playing?

People who use the whole keyboard.

For example, that guy in the letter.

Dear Inge and Sten,

May I add my two cents to the sexual discussion?

We are a married couple, about 25 years old.

About a year ago, we discovered the following,

we both enjoy sex.

Why don't you wear these?

-Your tights? -Yes.

And my knickers as well.

Your knickers as well.

Why?

You would make me very happy.

-In your tights? -Yes. I'll put on a pair as well.

And then we'll walk around in tights?

Yes, that's what I thought.

I will strip for you if you do it.

That might be better than watching Bonanza.

Okay, let's do it.

Which one goes on first?

My wife asked me to put on her tights.

At first, I thought it sounded a bit weird, but then I thought,

"Why not, if it amuses her?"

Now I think, "Why should this soft and skin-tight garment

"be reserved for girls?"

I was filled with such pleasure and well-being.

Now it's my turn.

What happens when a wife asks her husband

to wear her underwear?

Since it's the wife's proposal,

it's not a matter of the husband being a transvestite,

meaning a man who wants to wear women's clothing.

On the contrary, it's the wife who has a latent homosexual attraction.

With this arrangement, she tries to create a sister,

a homosexual make-believe person.

It's very common that the transvestite couple think of themselves as sisters.

Do you like it?

The following night, we repeated the scene that had given us so much pleasure,

and we combined it with striptease.

I stripped and danced for my husband

as he sat in the living room in my tights and knickers.

Then we put on identical shirts

so we looked like each other. I was very happy and content.

This is our little tip for everlasting happiness and bliss.

I thought about something. It's funny, but now that we have talked

and discussed

so much about men wearing women's clothing...

I personally have never been much for it,

but the man in front of the TV

-wearing nylon tights... -Yes?

I feel a hint of...

I think it would be a great idea.

Thank you.

Marianne, put the book away.

-Are you hungry? -A bit.

Can you open the beer? Do we have more beer?

No, we need to... Are we going to Vislanda tomorrow?

I guess so.

Listen to this.

Are you going to eat that much?

A couple that vacationed in Sweden

had problems with sex

and have started sort of a seminar with their friends.

It's like Masters and Johnson.

Their friends talk

and they have a schedule for every day.

Do they know each other before they go?

Yes, I think they do. You can read about it here.

Take your time.

Where is... Peter! Turn off the TV. Come and eat.

We have reacted very strongly

against the naturist movement's hearty talk claiming

that naturism and sex have nothing in common.

Take some.

Give it to me. How much do you want?

-That bit. -That's not much.

I don't want tomatoes.

Give it to me.

Little pig.

Have some milk as well.

You don't think or talk about sex within the naked community of the naturists.

We left nature and started our own nudist camp

in our villa, on a small scale, of course.

Soon we found out that many of our acquaintances

wanted to be more open and liberal, but they didn't have the courage.

In particular three young couples had problems and desires,

but were inhibited by shyness.

They wanted to be nudists but did not have the courage.

We figured a combination of therapy

and practical nudity would help them.

We followed a schedule that we had created beforehand.

My friends, this is the first exercise.

Showering.

Obviously, you have to get undressed. You have to when you shower.

Put your clothes in neat piles.

-Please go ahead. -The water is hot now,

but for the last couple there'll only be cold water!

So get started.

First day.

We get acquainted, undress together on the terrace,

take a shower, talk, drink coffee.

-You put them nicely yourself. -That's what I'm doing.

I think I'm first.

I'm not done yet.

- I have more clothes than... -Let's hit the shower.

I'm coming.

We talk about how important it is

that both sexes understand that the man's arousal is visible

and can be felt when one dances.

Day two.

We gather naked in our living room

and read short sex stories from a book.

-What happens now? -Here.

We are going to read pornography.

We have different kinds here. Let's see what we like.

Distribute these, please.

Everybody reads.

After, we discuss varieties of sex and what we'd be willing to accept.

-Would you mind reading to us? -Okay.

Read something you like.

"Her buttocks rose slowly and sensually.

"I accepted the silent invitation

"and turned her on her back.

"From my pleasurable position between her spread legs,

"I entered my cock deep into her pussy

"and fucked her with slow thrusts.

"I aimed upwards to reach her clitoris more easily."

Today is our third day here.

This is one of our most important exercises.

We will learn how to touch each other.

Everybody knows how to sexually touch someone. Touch here, touch there.

This should be a soft, nice

and emotional caress that later gives you so much more.

Let's try and touch one another.

Touch the person sitting closest, touch where it feels good.

We discuss what music and settings stimulate love-making.

You imagine a romantic meal,

and what you would eat and drink.

I'd like to serve something raw.

-Steak tartare, or a rare steak. -No.

I think I want champagne

and an omelette or a souffle.

Yes!

You should make love on an empty stomach.

That's what I think. What do you think?

I want all kinds of shellfish

and lots of pepper!

Now we're getting somewhere.

That's better, isn't it?

Yes, it is.

You can really tell the difference.

Yes, you can tell.

What is the difference?

It looks the girl and the boy like each other. You can tell that they do.

-They like what they are doing. -Yes.

It's a huge difference. This is fresh, clean and nice.

Day four.

We watch porn

and analyse which ones are exciting and which are not,

and why we think so.

-Perhaps they are married. -It's not what they do.

Is it?

It's aesthetically appealing.

-Are you getting turned on? -Yes.

Yes.

We talk about different aids,

such as ointments and vibrators.

Everyone gets the chance to try the vibrator,

either in the group,

and we then comment on how it feels,

or individually or with their partner.

If you have a hard time getting there, you can have your first orgasm with this.

It makes it easier afterwards to do it together.

We should get familiar with these things and see what they do.

We have all seen this before, a normal vibrator.

It does work if you try it.

Put it against the clitoris,

and the vibration feels good.

We're all shy to try it together.

This one is better because it has different speeds.

You can make it go faster, and it's quiet,

which is good.

It feels good, doesn't it?

-Right? It has a special feel. -Yes.

You try it.

I have felt it before.

I have tried it lots of times at other courses like this.

The fifth day, we let loose with dancing and playing.

The games are arousing.

After dinner, we study a sex scene,

after which, the couples retire to practise.

That's good. Yes.

Goodbye.

That was about the patent. It has been approved.

Really?

That's good. Now you only need to get the apparatus working as well.

That's right.

What does it cover, the patent?

It covers, I think,

the combination of

supporting the erection

and clitoral massage and a vibrator.

It's a special combination.

These three things...

Do you think anyone will buy it?

I really hope so. It's the first time

we produce something.

We do it because we believe in it, that it's a good thing.

But on the other hand, I don't understand

why people are afraid of using aids like this.

Yes, we know that.

They feel like it's a failure of some sort.

I would like for people

to see sexual aids as toys

because that's what they are.

Dear Inge and Sten,

We are two doctors who both have stressful and pressing workloads.

We both think that to balance that out,

a satisfactory sex life is needed.

We used to have a problem.

I had a really hard time reaching a climax.

I orgasm when my husband works my clitoris with his tongue

or his fingers,

but it takes a long time, sometimes up to half an hour.

It puts a lot of pressure on him.

That's why I thought we should try different vibrators.

We bought some of the most common ones.

-So this is the one that goes with a shaver? -Yes.

Feel how good it feels when it vibrates.

Let me...

Isn't that nice? Try that one.

No, I mean that one.

-This is so small, it can't amount to much. -Yes, absolutely.

The best perfume is sold in the smallest bottles.

See? Pocket-size.

-There is no button here. -You turn it on like this.

It's a bit more feisty.

Nice?

And then we have this one,

this fantastic thing.

What is it?

It's a larger thing.

This one

you plug in.

This is good stuff. Look.

-Feel it. -It's really soft.

As doctors, we would have made for poor patients

if we had settled for an ocular examination of the vibrators.

Therefore,

we tried the whole set thoroughly.

It turned out that I really enjoyed

the vibrations from the machine.

Perhaps that's not so strange.

Masters and Johnson surveyed

a large group of people,

and it was conveyed that the best way to reach climax

was when the woman held the vibrator herself.

It terms of time and intensity,

it gives the best result.

Masturbation came next,

and lastly, the partner.

I have always enjoyed wearing provocative lingerie during sex,

and it works well with these devices.

It heightened the pornographic value.

Please, give me that big one.

You need to do that by yourself.

Please go ahead.

I quickly got flushed on my breasts and throat

which showed that I was unusually aroused,

and my husband also got very aroused by seeing me like this.

It would normally take me half an hour to reach climax.

Now it took less than one minute.

The absolutely best effect

was with the electrical device,

used with foam-rubber on the vibrator.

Oddly enough, I climaxed many times

with very short foreplay.

One position that we both enjoy

is when I'm on my knees holding the vibrator to my clitoris,

while my husband penetrates me from behind.

We climax at the same time and for both of us, it's very strong.

One would think that the use of the vibrator would be inhibiting,

but it's quite the contrary. Even the sound is very arousing.

Sometimes Inge's and Sten's students from Copenhagen come and visit.

Do you remember the first time we were in the sauna?

That was fun. We didn't know each other very well so we were a bit nervous.

But as soon as you set foot inside, everything felt natural.

It is strange that being naked is such a taboo.

We've found out from so many letters

and from a lot of research

that many people fantasise about nakedness when they masturbate.

Taboos as such are used in fantasies.

And especially in our sexual fantasies.

One of the most popular fantasies involves a rather large penis.

Many women find the thought of an extremely large penis very exciting.

We recognise this fantasy.

Doesn't Inge say that she wants to walk bare-chested down the high street?

Yes, that's right.

Fantasising about being a prostitute is also very common

and has to do, just like the fantasy of rape, with a feeling of humiliation.

Incestuous relations with parents or siblings,

or relations with teachers are also popular fantasies.

One woman wants to think of herself as underage

and imagines how her pubic hair is shaved off.

But do only girls have fantasies?

No, I don't think so.

But research on women and fantasy

shows that women fantasise more during sex,

but that both partners surely fantasise.

It's true that men fantasise more when they masturbate,

but it's not only when you are alone that you do.

You can also do it more deliberately

and use your imagination.

You can discuss it and agree

that now we are talking about the fantasies and one shouldn't be afraid of it.

We have received letters from people who really have learnt to use their fantasies.

Good evening.

Can we have three beers, please?

Can you show in the guests?

Dear Inge and Sten,

We are a young married couple.

We have always had a good sex life.

We haven't had any real problems,

it hasn't been breathtaking either.

Somewhere deep inside I guess we have wished

for more excitement.

That is probably why

my wife and I and a female relative of mine

went to a sex club

that we saw an ad for in the paper.

We were a bit shy at first.

But as the show grew more exciting,

I noticed how the girls were aroused.

There was no doubt that both my wife and my cousin Jane were really aroused.

At the same time, something happened to me and my wife,

a desire for sex of this kind.

Jane also seemed to be into it.

We talked about the reason for our arousal for a long time.

We agreed that it was probably the sex combined with the audience.

With people watching,

a special and really exciting atmosphere is created.

My wife, my cousin and I

had no experience with group sex or lesbian sex.

Still, it didn't take long for us to make a decision.

We all took the next day off,

and [ arranged a sort of sex club in our little living room,

with chairs and lamps and music.

The girls had their lesbian sex,

which they obviously found exciting.

I sat there watching, since it was the first time.

I also found it very exciting and thrilling.

I voluntarily accepted the fact

that I could look but not touch, something that made me even more excited.

This is quite true.

In the Masters and Johnson sex seminars for impotence,

the proposed taboo has successfully been used as stimulus.

After my wife had climaxed with Jane,

I knew that it was my turn.

Like at the real sex club,

I was invited by the girls to try an intimate massage.

It was not hard to convince me.

Now it was Jane's turn to watch.

A strange thing happened.

Even though my wife performed

in exactly the same way she had so many times before,

it became something different

with Jane sitting there, watching us.

In our imagination, all the other chairs in our living room were occupied,

with an imaginary nightclub audience

consisting of both men and women, young and old,

all of them curious and with sexual lust in their invisible faces.

Soon I could see that Jane's excitement was strong.

I have never known my wife to be so engaged in the act,

but the moaning and screaming

made Jane approach us, as she could not longer resist.

The intercourse had turned into a threesome.

There, in front of our imaginary audience

we all experienced the most spectacular sex we could have ever wished for.

And still it was only a game.

-Hello, sweetheart. -Hello.

-How was your day? -Terrible.

Meetings all day.

Poor thing.

And that guy doesn't know what he's doing.

Dear Inge and Sten,

My husband and I have a very happy sex life.

There are many reasons why.

We are young and good-looking, we have a beautiful home and a good income.

We know a lot of people in the same situation,

but still marriages keep falling apart.

The most common reason seems to be unfaithfulness.

Men are tempted during travels and at work,

while women have a lot of free time and are tempted to use it,

for example, to get to know their husband's friends.

We have seen it so many times, and it always follows the same pattern.

Should it be a woman or a man?

-A man, of course. -Why is that?

-A man. -It's better with a girl.

-No. -It only ends up in a fight, you know that.

He falls in love with you.

-It's better with a girl. -No, I don't think so.

Girls are much softer.

Who should it be then?

What do you say about the girl at Kim and Frank's?

-That blonde girl. -You mean Jane?

-Yes, why not? -She is pretty.

Should we try and find her?

She goes to that disco on Hornsgatan. Let's go there.

And then I tell her how much I like her, and then I kiss her.

And she gets afraid and runs away.

I have a much better idea. Let's have a party with open-minded people.

Okay. Who with?

Oh, I don't know. You tell me.

-Kim and Frank? -Yes.

-Gittan and Lasse? -Yes, why not.

And some hot girls.

-And some hot guys as well. -Okay.

We'll start with a nice dinner.

How's everybody doing?

Let's move over here.

Thank you so much.

My friends, let's not sit here. Let's go downstairs to the bar.

You mean the sauna and the pool.

I know you.

What's wrong with that? You don't seem shy.

I don't mind at all.

You all seem pretty transparent.

-Shall we go? -Okay, let's go.

-It sounds like fun. -Yes, it does.

I don't want to take off my hat.

Then you get to wear it in the water.

You get to swim with the hat.

Once we're in the sauna,

we can tell stories.

Yes, that will amuse them.

Then we jump in the pool, and you go and turn on the stereo.

Britten?

Take of her robe.

Maybe you understand by now how we use our imagination.

We lie together in bed

and talk about the most amazing things we could get up to.

But it's only in our imagination

that I let my husband court Britten and Jane.

In reality, it might be totally different.

Wait a minute.

That is too transparent. It's a man's wishful thinking.

Why would she care about you? She's so good-looking.

Come on.

I have a better idea. We'll have a small party.

We'll invite men who aren't that handsome. That way, you can outshine them a bit.

Oh, that would be nice.

Everything is like before, but no dancing.

We'll invite Uncle Adolf, he loves body-painting.

The rose that I have painted

And the dot over the "I" here.

There we go.

And a little thing there.

How luxurious.

I don't want to have sex with a girl that has paint all over her body.

I have a better idea.

We'll invite her here, only her.

We'll have a wonderful dinner with good wine.

No, don't. What shall Greta think?

I agree with Karl, I think you're gorgeous.

We fantasise like that

until we get so turned on that we can't stop.

It's our little secret.

That way, we don't have to be unfaithful.

Take the other chair.

Let's put that over there.

We need the couch, too. Can you?

Let's just put that here.

I'll just get it.

Is that enough?

You can put on some more.

Every time the students from Copenhagen come and visit,

Inge and Sten usually invite them

for a dinner of lamb, smoked salmon or something that you can grill outdoors.

During the preparation, Inge recalled a letter

that seems to be the key to everything we've talked about.

We've talked a lot about playing,

and I thought

that it really doesn't matter if you are young or old

or where you are or if you are rich or poor.

The important thing is that you are able to play with each other.

Dear Inge and Sten,

We are an old couple. We have celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary

and have always enjoyed sex.

We often have sex,

but every once in while, there are periods of indifference in which we have no sex at all.

We play a fun game that helps us out during these down periods

and that brings us back to our happy sex life.

We pretend that we don't know each other,

and when I clumsily drop something on the floor in the shop,

Robert runs up to me and helps me as a total stranger.

He offers to carry the groceries,

and after I've paid,

it seems normal that he gives me a ride home

since I live in a residential area, and it's a long way to the shop.

It feels exciting and indecent

to travel with a stranger by your side in broad daylight.

When we arrive at our villa, the kind gentleman carries the bags.

He is so kind and helpful. I cannot resist inviting him in for dinner.

Pretty soon we become quite good friends.

Only a few minutes ago, we were complete strangers.

Had I not dropped that frozen package,

this wouldn't have happened.

I must tell you. It feels like

a dream come true.

-Is that so? -You see, when you came

into the shop today, I started watching you,

and something happened inside of me.

I have never felt like that before. You had such... And you still have

such charisma and sensuality

-that I've never seen before. -Do you think so?

I have never felt like this before.

When you stood by the window with the sun shining through,

I saw your silhouette.

It really made me...

I'm still in good shape.

Very much so.

What did you think about my meatballs?

-Fantastic. -Really?

They were even better than my mum's.

I'm so glad to hear that.

Cheers.

I haven't felt like this for anyone before.

This is another example that shows us that by using our imagination,

like these two, who do so with a little theatre,

we can canalise desires of unfaithfulness,

and at the same time, revitalise faded feelings.

This can make things as exciting as they once were.

I'll run out and get some Danish.

They would go nicely with the morning coffee.

Then I'll put on the kettle.

You are fantastic. You are just wonderful.

"Mum's meatballs."

Bye for now.

After this marvellous love night, we continue our comedy

until my husband goes to get some Danish.

When he comes back he is no longer the interesting stranger,

but my dear, old husband.

-Hi. -Hello.

It was about time. Where have you been all night?

I should have called, but I couldn't find a telephone.

We were at Johan's playing poker.

I got drunk, and they laid me down and I fell asleep.

I brought some Danish.

I hope you haven't been worried.

Not at all, I've had a great time.

I'm glad to hear that.

While they have their late dinner in the cool Nordic summer night,

we are going to summarise.

We gathered a number of content people's sexual experiences.

We tried to give halting relationships

of fed-up wives and girl-hunting husbands

a new chance to revitalise and diversify their sex life,

with the help of their imagination.

-How was the water? -It was wonderful.

Just great.

If living together was this easy, there wouldn't be any problems.

That is what these examples helped us portray.

It's no match when you are away from everyday life and the normal routine.

It's also about respecting the other person's wishes.

The most important thing

is to overcome different taboos together.