All language subtitles for Call Me Fitz (2010) S01E13 (1080p AMZN WEB-DL H265 SDR DDP 5.1 English - HONE)_track4_[eng]

[Giggling]

Giddy up, Fitz!

FITZ:
We all do questionable things.

Bless you, my son.

I'm not saying I don't regret.
Of course I do.

I'm human.

I take my pants off
one leg at a time.

But I don't obsess
over the things I've done,

the choices I've made.

Come here, Fitzy.

Why should I?

Life is something
to experience,

to savour.

I believe in honesty.

Save some for me, baby.

And honestly,

I like to party.

[Laughing]

Even if I could turn back
the clock, I wouldn't.

What's that
old Chinese pronoun?

"Carpe Diem,"
live for the day.

Let me go right now,
I won't call the cops,

and we can all just
walk away from this thing.

Ring-a-ding, ding,
no one gets hurt.

Okay. We don't have to
test that theory.

Oof. Fuck.

Is this some kind of
perverted sexual thing?

'Cause I could get behind that.

What do you think this is?

Uh, to be perfectly honest,

I'm kind of getting
mixed signals.

♪

♪ Without you

♪ I find my smile

♪ Without you

♪ I'd have won
by a mile ♪

♪ Without you

♪ Oh, life would be
so grand ♪

♪ Without you

♪ I'm half a man

♪ Without you

♪ Without you

♪ Without you

This is a sex thing.
I knew it.

[Laughing]

The striped wallpaper,
the floral-print drapes.

I'm gonna say
the Cornwallis Inn on Highway 7,

Room 104?

No. 106.

Do you always talk so much
when you're afraid?

"Fear is the enemy of logic."
Frank Sinatra.

And what about now?

Take it easy there, darling.

Uh, I'll finish.

You can go help with
the camera.

I know you.

Get away from the chair.
Now!

And you, just shut up.

You know, when my partner Larry
realises I'm missing,

you guys better watch out.

He's like a killer robot
from the future.

Relentless, unstoppable,
and totally dedicated to me.

[Oinking]

Is my name Mark?
Or am I Dave?

Does Mark like beer?
Is Dave a Scotch man?

Perhaps Mark fancies
red wine,

and Dave only drinks
club soda.

How is this photo
linked to Richard?

Who am I?

And what is up
with that hair?

So tell me, are you and Fitz
ready to go down?

Huh?

For, uh, Rupta's Prestige Auto
shall be victorious.

You know,
if we had machine guns,

we would be firing them
in the air.

It is sad
that the Fitzes won't be here

to feel the crushing blow
of defeat.

Uh, what do you mean
by this, cousin?

Yes. What--

Has something happened
to Richard?

You better
tell me what you know,

or I will punch you
in your face!

Okay, if I did something
to Richard Fitzpatrick,

it would be news
to sing aloud.

All right?
You large and gangly one.

Oh, please.
You do not even have the nerve.

Larry may not be capable
of violence,

but Mark sure as hell is!

Or maybe Dave!
Dah.

Cousin, do you have something
to tell me?

Victory is ours!

Ow!

Shut up and read.

Out loud!

No fuckin' way!

Why not?'Cause it's bullshit.

"A danger to women,"
"an evil, selfish man."

You make me sound like
I'm Satan.

I'm not evil.
Ask Sonya, she'll tell you.

There's no Sonya here.

[Sighing]

What are you doing?
It was a wild guess!

Hardly.
Sonya's scent is unmistakeable.

A bouquet of cinnamon
and lavender,

with just a hint
of baked bread.

And what about you, Ali?

You think I wasn't gonna
recognize you?

Those eyes.
Those two silver mirrors,

but for a brief,
beautiful moment,

reflected the happiness that I
never thought I truly deserved?

You had your chance.

You blew it.

Richard?
Hey, Richard?

Hey, where are you,
Richard?

Ah!

Kevin.

I blew it
with both of you.

But there isn't one moment
I don't cherish.

We weren't just
strangers in the night, baby.

Jesus.

I think we made
a terrible mistake.

We are warrior goddesses.

Don't let some crappy Sinatra
lyrics sway your resolve.

But maybe we could
just let him go?

Like I said,
no harm, no foul.

You do nothing but harm.

You ruin lives,
destroy families,

you spread disease.

You claim to be
some master seducer,

but you haven't
identified me yet.

What's the matter,
Casanova?

Can't recognize
one of your conquests?

Need to smell me again?

How about a blow job?

I never forget a tongue.

Though you might have to
slip in a finger.

Here's a hint.

Nope.

See, ladies?
Words.

I don't remember you
because I never did you.

Oh, you screwed me,

in more ways
than you can imagine,

because you're evil,

and you're selfish, and that
is why you must be destroyed.

Uh, I thought that
we were doing an internet PSA.

Uh, I'd never agree
to losing him for good.

Uh, yeah.
No, me neither.

This better be
really fucking important,

because they're starting
to show videos of the dead guys,

and I like to know who one
of those bastards I've outlived.

Just admit
it was you all along,

sending me that photo,
locking us in the warehouse,

using a sweet childhood toy

to confuse and devastate
your own son.

We both know you'd do anything
to keep Richard from the awards,

and when your plan
to sabotage failed,

you had him kidnapped.

Save it, Pantyface.

If I want him gone,
it'll be quick and mean.

I don't have time
for cat-and-mouse bullshit.

And what's Plan C?
Hmm?

Reveal that he cheated
on his dealership exam?

Thanks, Larry.

No, no. I--

Oh, no.

Hey, Cara.
Check it out.

I'm gonna put you
on speaker phone.

I'm scoring the interior of the
pipe for maximum fragmentation.

I still think
you should use

a diesel and fertiliser compound.

Yeah, but sulphur and potassium nitrate makes a prettier boom,

you know,
like shock and awe!

This isn't
a fireworks display, Josh.

Don't worry.
Just sparkly enough

to blow you a nice,
little hole out of that joint.

Can you be ready by tonight?

[Whistling]

Stay strong, my love.

I'll try.

Obviously, there's been
a simple misunderstanding,

so I propose
we take a few moments

for private reflection
and meditation,

and then we'll debate
about what to do with it.

I'll get some white wine.

Perfect.

Oh, and a turkey club,
no tomatoes.

Oh, come on, guys.

It's my big day
you're messing with.

You at least
gotta feed me.

Nothing for him.

He has low blood sugar.

Oh, shut up.
Go get the wine.

Okay, Larry.
You can do this.

You're a part of Richard,
you're his conscience.

Maybe.

Just close your eyes
and let him guide you to him.

Who am I?

Larry, Mark, Dave?

MAN:
Hey, Mark, is that you?

What did he say?

Dave?

Universe, just give me
a damn sign.

[Phone ringing]

Larry speaking.

Larry, you gotta hurry.

They are gonna chop off
his private parts.

Upstairs, Room 106.

I'm coming, partner.

To sisterhood.

Yeah.
A little dry here.

[Knocking on door]

One word, and they'll
be putting you back together

like a jigsaw puzzle.

Who is it?

LARRY [High-pitched voice]:
Room service.

You ordered him food.

Just
leave it outside.

You have to
sign for it.

Unhand him!

Who the hell is that?

Larry. Pleased to--

That's what you brought
to rescue me with? You idiot!

Oh, nice.

The guy comes to save you,
and you insult him?

Glad to hear you're
an equal opportunity prick!

I came to save my partner,
and that's what I'm going to do.

Oh, and you think
we're just gonna let him go?

Well,
where I come from,

if you've got a fox in
the henhouse, you kill the fox.

Well, who made you judge, jury
and executioner?

[Scoffing]

No,
Larry is right.

Richard Fitz is no fox.

I am very attractive, though.

Okay, can you truly
stand here before me

and say that Richard
is responsible for

all the ills
that have befallen you?

Okay. Hands up.

Who thought that they could tame
Richard Fitzpatrick?

I thought I could,
and I lost a kidney.

Who's fault is that?
His or mine?

That bastard's.
His.

Well,
he deserves a trial.

He has a point.
And do you really think

there's any chance in hell
he could win?

I say we should that bastard
what he's made of.

Whole truth,
nothing but.

The Women versus
Richard Fitzpatrick.

All rise.

I could use a little help.

Richard!

There you are.

I've been looking for you everywhere.

I found a broom closet.
It's unlocked,

and it smells like
industrial cleaner.

I don't know why that turns me
on so much, but it does.

Is this all I am to you?

The sexual equivalent
to a convenience store?

"Thank you, come again."

What's your problem?

Isn't it obvious?

I'm tired of being treated like
a piece of meat.

Or you haven't told your cousin
about us yet.

He's making it
most difficult.

But I cannot let his venomous
rage toward your family

keep me from ravishing you

in the most time-effective
manner possible.

Oh, baby, I--

I--

Can't even bring yourself
to say the words.

Don't you get it,
you big sap?

I can't say
those three words first.

Because if I say them first
and you don't say them back,

my heart might explode.

Is that what you want,

to blow me up?

What if we say the words
at the same time?

- I'd like that.
- I'd like that too.

I love you.
You terrify me.

That's close enough.

Perfect. My cousin
will never find us in here.

We did it in the broom closet,
the bathroom,

and garage,
in an office,

a car--

Oh, lots of cars.

Uh, the bar,
and a couple of hotels.

This one, actually.

ALI:
Okay. And were you boyfriend
and girlfriend?

I wanted to be, but he had
a different term for it.

"Buddies who--"

You know.

When I realised he didn't
respect me, I broke it off.

And you have never had relations
with Mr. Fitzpatrick again?

No.
Well, once.

Right after his wife died,
we did it in a van.

Fucker.

I'm sorry.
Is that allowed?

Miss Lester, do you recall
the events leading up to

Richard's day
in a detox facility?

Um, wasn't that the day
he tried to kill you?

Nice question, numb nuts.

Yeah, but before that, did
he not accuse me of lying to you

in order to
get in to your pants?

Yes.

And how did he respond

when you challenged
his intentions,

vis-à-vis said pants?

Well, he said that he was trying
to get into my pants too,

but at least
he was honest about it.

Thank you.

Well, he was.

Know what I hate
about action movies?

The lack of well-rounded
female characters?

Why do bad guys use different
colour wires for their bomb?

You know. Hero shows up, and his
buddy's all, "Cut the red wire!"

That's why I used one colour.

Red.
In honour of your hat.

Oh, Josh,
that's so sweet.

Can we talk about the trigger?

Ah. I went old school.

Alarm clock.

Think 21-century.

Jet pack?

Cell phone.

It's risky.

Then I can detonate it
by phone,

and you'll have
a plausible alibi.

And then
we can be together?

Yes, Josh.
So then we can be together.

Awesome.

I always knew that--[Dial tone]

Oh, okay.

I had just gotten a divorce,
and I needed a car.

But from the moment
I saw him,

he was all I wanted.

The way he flirted with me,

our test drive was a dream.

And the promises he made.

How we could throw it all away
and run off together,

and follow the open road
stretching out before us.

Sounds like
something I'd say.

You lied to me.

I wove you a dream.

Some dream.

I flushed $5500 on a rusted-out
Corolla with bad CV joints

because I thought
you wanted me.

Now, if that's not a lie,

I don't know what is.

If there's one thing
I never forget,

it's the women I've enjoyed.

You think I wouldn't try
and hit that?

She is attractive.

It's a choice piece of trim
with some grade-A sweater meat.

There's no way
I wouldn't throw it in her.

Of course you would.

There's no way
that Richard Fitzpatrick

wouldn't come on
to a woman he found attractive.

Cha.

That is a very sad story,
Miss Carlisle,

and a very nice turtle neck.

Is there a question here?

Yes. Yes, of course.

Do you think I look more like
a Mark or a Dave?

What does that have to do
with anything?

Definitely a Mark.

Thank you, Sonya.
It's been driving me nuts.

And there's nothing worse

than an identity crisis.

Isn't that right, Julia?

Ask a question or sit down.

Tell me, did you leave
any details out of your story?

- No.
- You told the truth,

the whole truth,
and nothing but the truth?

Yes.
Where did you get
your sex change?

Johns Hopkins.

Objection!

No, wait. I--

- A Corolla?
- No, wait--

Carl LeBlanc?

You do remember me.

No, no, no--

Not another step.

Oh. Man hands.

May I see you in chambers?

Um, in light
of new information,

I'm willing to cut a deal.

How about a thumb?

You're talking to a man
who had his kidney stolen.

There's no way I'd agree
to any wilful mutilation.

Well, he's not getting
out of here in one piece, Larry.

You know what I think?

I think you're afraid
to let Richard testify

in his own defence.
I am not.

What scares you more?

The fact that he might admit
that he doesn't love you,

or that he does?

Ask your questions.

Boop.

CARA:
You've connected the cell
to the bomb?

Yes.

And you remembered
to load the explosives?

Yes.

What do you think I am?
Some kind of moron?

[Charging noises]

[Laughing]

Why are you--

I don't get--

[Laughing]

Uhh, Oh.

[Sighing]

Wait a minute.

We're not using this bomb to
break you out of juvie, are we?

Nope.

And that story about Fitz,
about him and your mom

and the divorce and your
step dad, was any of that true?

Every good lie
contains a kernel of truth.

Why?
What did Fitzy ever do to you?

There are rules in life, Josh,

and Richard Fitzpatrick
doesn't follow them.

That is all the reason
I need.

This is about rules?

What's so fucking great
about following rules?

You mean,
like the red-wire rule?

Oh, shit.

You better run, Josh.

You don't have much time.

Oh...

[Gagging]

From hell's heart,
I stab at thee.

Oh, fuck.
Who can I call?

For hate's sake,
I spit my last breath at thee.

Hey, Kasib!

Yes?
Yes, who is this?

Drats.

It's Josh.
Josh?

Josh McTaggart.

Josh--I rented your safe house.

- Josh McTaggart, yes!
- Yeah! Hey!

Yes, I remember.

Uh, what's shaking? Yes, I remember you.

Fuck.

Richard Fitzpatrick.

Call me "Fitz."

All right.

Fitz, do you love
any of the women in this room?

Fitzy loves all women.

I love them young and old,
big and small.

Hell, I might even love
a new recruit.

Play your cards right, Carl.

Permission to treat
as hostile?

Please.

You work
at Fitzpatrick Motors

with your father,
Ken Fitzpatrick.

Are you
the top salesman there?

I have been,
in the past, yes.

And do you think
your father respects you?

Come on, Larry.
Quit fucking around.

Yes or no?

No.

Your mother abandoned you
as a child.

Yes.

Because she loved you?

Come on, Larry.
You were there, man.

You know
how she feels about me.

Does your mother
love you?

No.

Come on. You're supposed to be
fucking helping me, here.

What I'm trying to do
is show these ladies

that you never had a chance,

that you aren't capable
of love.

Who is this?

Who is it?

Who is it?

It's just some--

Just some fuckin' toy rabbit.

Yeah?
And what's your name for him?

FITZ:
I, um--

LARRY:
What's your name for him?

Kevin.
Kevin.

And what would you do
if I did this to Kevin?

Huh?

What would you do?

Don't you hurt him,
you son of a bitch!

Okay, that's enough
fucking around.

You let him go!
He never did anything to you!

- We've seen enough.
- Just let him go.

No, I think he deserves
to be punished!

Sit down, Carl.

[Phone ringing]

Larry speaking.

Hey, Lar.
Um, so listen.

Um, remember the dealership?

Something kind of happened.

It's kind of funny, actually,
when you think about it.

[Busy tone]

Fuck, fuck, fuck!

Really? And it is big, boy.

- It is a big one.
- Isn't that something?

Okay, uh, well--

You see--

Josh has built a bomb
in the garage.

Yeah, and he's using
a cell phone as a trigger,

and he has to
stay on the line,

otherwise the bomb
could explode,

and destroy the dealership
and maybe an entire city block.

What the fuck?

Yeah.
He's a little flummoxed.

He could really use our help.

Well, untie me!

For luck.

Mm. Cinnamon. Thanks.

A whole bunch of cupcakes.

And I was like,
"I don't like cupcakes."

Stay on the line, Josh.
Keep talking.

Fuck!

Okay. No.

Yeah. Fair enough.

Don't let
anything happen to him.

Richard, let's go.

Not on my life,
Mr. Fitz.

Okay,
we're on our way, Josh.

Just keep talking, buddy.

Richard Fitzpatrick!

You have dishonoured
my family,

and I will be avenged!

[Yelling]

Oh, my nose!

You cannot
let them procreate!

The Fitzpatricks and Ruptas
cannot mix!

You are the enemy!
The child will be beige!

And it was the middle of
the night, and all I had to eat

was mealworms for
three fucking days in a row,

and I had a theme song
in my head.

I couldn't
get it out of my head,

and I didn't remember
what TV show it was.

So I just kept
walking and singing.

MAN:
And the award for

Richard, Richard!
Your award!

MAN:
Salesman of the Year!

Let's go!

We're not gonna have
a dealership

if we don't haul ass.

Come on!

Richard,
you have my word.

If we get through this alive,
I will go.

If it's what you want,
I will get out of

your artfully blow-dried hair,
once and for all.

Halle-fuckin'-lujah.

Let's go!

MAN:
Used-car salesman of the year

goes to...

Marlene, she gave me the steel
wool which made it all really--

Hey, Larry. I was
just talking to you on the--

No, no!
Oh. Right.

Hey, Fitzy.

I didn't think
you were gonna show,

what with you being
all pissed at me and stuff.

Yeah! It's my fucking
dealership, man!

And my fucking life!

I'm sorry!

It's junior survivalist bitch.
She lied to me.

And you're an asshole.

But you never lied to me.

And I miss that, man.

The being-the-asshole-not-lying
shtick.

Go fuck yourself, Josh.

Thanks, man.

No, don't!
What?

Okay.

How come
all the wires are red?

Yeah.

Yeah, it's cool, huh?

See, I was thinking--

We gotta
get this thing out of here

and blow it up somewhere.

The GT.

That cursed mother fucker.

Richard, are you
out of your mind?

You're going to destroy
that can again, with us in it?

You got a better idea?

No.
No.

Why?

Josh,
open the door.

Go break
some fuckin' rules, Fitzy!

Whoo!

Richard would be very honoured
to receive this award.

Unfortunately,
he's not eligible.

[Crowd gasping]

Richard Fitzpatrick does not
have a dealer's license.

[Chattering]

Pick up, pick up.

Pick up, pick up, pick up!

We've lost signal!

She can't get through!

Fuck!

We've got a signal!

♪

That's somehow anticlimactic.

[Ringing]

♪

♪ Let someone
start believing in you ♪

♪ Let him hold out his hand

♪ Let him touch you

♪ And watch what happens

♪ When someone
who can look in your eyes ♪

♪ And see into your heart

♪ Let him find you and watch

♪ What happens

Morning.

You made the right decision, partner.

Shut the fuck up, Larry.

♪ Let someone

♪ With a deep love to give

♪ Give that deep love
to you ♪

♪ And what magic you'll see

♪ Let someone give his heart

♪ Someone who cares like me

♪ Let someone give his heart

♪ Who cares like me

♪