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1
00:00:06,093 --> 00:00:09,096
Alexis: First of all,
welcome to my office.
2
00:00:09,139 --> 00:00:11,402
Now I think we all know
that most VIP guests
3
00:00:11,446 --> 00:00:13,404
wouldn't be caught dead
at a motel like this,
4
00:00:13,448 --> 00:00:14,884
no offense.
5
00:00:14,927 --> 00:00:17,582
But I have been able
to secure...
6
00:00:17,626 --> 00:00:20,324
a V-VIP guest.
7
00:00:20,368 --> 00:00:22,848
- Well, I'd go out on a limb
and say all of our guests
8
00:00:22,892 --> 00:00:24,894
are very important, Alexis.
9
00:00:24,937 --> 00:00:26,548
- That's cute.
10
00:00:26,591 --> 00:00:29,899
Anyway, Emir Kaplan is a very
influential travel blogger,
11
00:00:29,942 --> 00:00:31,683
so it is of the utmost
importance
12
00:00:31,727 --> 00:00:34,556
that we all make him feel
at home.
13
00:00:34,599 --> 00:00:37,907
- Hmm. Well, if he's looking
for that homey feeling,
14
00:00:37,950 --> 00:00:39,517
I should just invite him
over for dinner.
15
00:00:39,561 --> 00:00:41,519
Joce is making pot roast.
16
00:00:41,563 --> 00:00:43,043
All he'd have to bring
is a couple of sides,
17
00:00:43,086 --> 00:00:44,348
a bottle of wine,
18
00:00:44,392 --> 00:00:45,697
and something nice
for the house.
19
00:00:45,741 --> 00:00:47,308
Nothing cheap.
20
00:00:47,351 --> 00:00:49,745
- "The Road Less Traveled?"
- It's a very famous blog.
21
00:00:49,788 --> 00:00:51,660
He writes all about
the best eats, stays,
22
00:00:51,703 --> 00:00:53,879
and attractions
off the beaten path.
23
00:00:53,923 --> 00:00:55,316
- Well, I don't want
to second-guess
24
00:00:55,359 --> 00:00:56,969
your publicity skills
here Alexis,
25
00:00:57,013 --> 00:00:58,362
but I don't think it would hurt
26
00:00:58,406 --> 00:01:00,364
to tilt the scales
in our favour.
27
00:01:00,408 --> 00:01:02,540
When we wanted to impress
people at Rose Video,
28
00:01:02,584 --> 00:01:04,020
- [Groans] Okay.
29
00:01:04,064 --> 00:01:05,848
Coffee break.
30
00:01:05,891 --> 00:01:08,329
- We'd sometimes hire actors
who would come in as plants,
31
00:01:08,372 --> 00:01:11,593
pretending to be--
- Customers! Yes!
32
00:01:11,636 --> 00:01:14,683
Walk around, talk up whatever
they're paid to talk up.
33
00:01:14,726 --> 00:01:17,468
I know, I was once paid
to talk up
34
00:01:17,512 --> 00:01:20,254
Heartblaster Energy Drink
at a Third Eye Blind concert.
35
00:01:20,297 --> 00:01:23,083
- I'm pretty sure we don't
have the budget for actors.
36
00:01:23,126 --> 00:01:25,215
- I mean, if you're looking
to pay some guy to lie
37
00:01:25,259 --> 00:01:26,869
about how great this motel is,
38
00:01:26,912 --> 00:01:28,740
I'm happy to step in.
39
00:01:28,784 --> 00:01:30,612
- Do we need Roland?
- Stevie!
40
00:01:30,655 --> 00:01:32,614
You can be the plant.
41
00:01:32,657 --> 00:01:35,051
You look like someone who
just wandered in off the road.
42
00:01:35,095 --> 00:01:36,444
- Thanks.
43
00:01:36,487 --> 00:01:38,794
- And Johnny can be
our Manager.
44
00:01:38,837 --> 00:01:40,100
- Okay, first of all,
you've gotta stop
45
00:01:40,143 --> 00:01:41,623
with the Johnny business, okay?
46
00:01:41,666 --> 00:01:43,451
And secondly, I am the Manager.
47
00:01:43,494 --> 00:01:45,279
- Okay, well, you should
probably start
48
00:01:45,322 --> 00:01:47,890
getting into character, then.
Okay, thanks.
49
00:01:49,631 --> 00:01:54,375
♪♪♪
50
00:01:55,811 --> 00:01:56,855
[Birds chirp]
51
00:01:59,336 --> 00:02:01,251
Ray: Knock, knock,
everybody decent?
52
00:02:01,295 --> 00:02:03,035
- Oh my God!
- Once again, Ray,
53
00:02:03,079 --> 00:02:04,689
saying "knock knock"
is not the same thing
54
00:02:04,733 --> 00:02:06,256
as actually knocking.
55
00:02:06,300 --> 00:02:07,692
- I'm just making breakfast,
and I wanted to know
56
00:02:07,736 --> 00:02:09,259
if I should make extra
for you two.
57
00:02:09,303 --> 00:02:10,782
- No, I think we're good.
- Yes...
58
00:02:10,826 --> 00:02:12,567
- Great! Door open, or closed?
59
00:02:12,610 --> 00:02:13,785
- Closed.
60
00:02:13,829 --> 00:02:14,917
- [Chuckles]
61
00:02:18,050 --> 00:02:20,270
- Okay, I thought you were
gonna talk to him about this.
62
00:02:20,314 --> 00:02:23,186
I let very few people
see me before 9:00 AM.
63
00:02:23,230 --> 00:02:26,058
- I did. The "knock knock"
is him taking the note.
64
00:02:26,102 --> 00:02:28,104
- Well, you might want to
invest in a "lock lock" then.
65
00:02:28,148 --> 00:02:29,366
- Mm.
66
00:02:29,410 --> 00:02:31,542
- Knock knock!
- Holy fuck!
67
00:02:31,586 --> 00:02:33,892
- I realized I don't have eggs,
but I do have pancake mix.
68
00:02:33,936 --> 00:02:36,199
How do we feel about that?
69
00:02:36,243 --> 00:02:37,940
- Four, please.
70
00:02:37,983 --> 00:02:40,377
- David, you're constantly
talking about how much you eat.
71
00:02:40,421 --> 00:02:42,553
But I've seen you walk from
the bedroom to the shower,
72
00:02:42,597 --> 00:02:44,338
and you look fine.
73
00:02:44,381 --> 00:02:45,861
- Huh?
74
00:02:45,904 --> 00:02:48,037
- Okay Ray,
we-we might need a minute.
75
00:02:48,080 --> 00:02:50,909
- Of course.
Door open, or closed?
76
00:02:50,953 --> 00:02:52,215
- Closed.
77
00:02:54,565 --> 00:02:56,176
- Wow!
78
00:02:56,219 --> 00:02:57,829
- Okay, this is not working
anymore.
79
00:02:57,873 --> 00:03:01,093
I think it's time
we look for an apartment.
80
00:03:02,878 --> 00:03:04,836
- Oh. Okay, I mean...
81
00:03:06,316 --> 00:03:08,188
if that's what you want.
82
00:03:08,231 --> 00:03:10,146
- Well, I think it's more
of a need at this point, David.
83
00:03:10,190 --> 00:03:11,930
I've been thinking
about it for a while.
84
00:03:11,974 --> 00:03:13,236
- Oh.
85
00:03:13,280 --> 00:03:14,759
Ray: Gentlemen,
you're gonna laugh,
86
00:03:14,803 --> 00:03:16,457
but I just remembered,
we do have eggs.
87
00:03:16,500 --> 00:03:18,720
They're in the pantry,
next to the pancake mix,
88
00:03:18,763 --> 00:03:20,243
which means they've been
sitting out for days.
89
00:03:20,287 --> 00:03:21,810
Are we feeling lucky?
90
00:03:21,853 --> 00:03:23,725
- Can I still have
the pancakes?
91
00:03:23,768 --> 00:03:25,944
- Yes!
92
00:03:25,988 --> 00:03:28,512
- Ray!
- Patrick?
93
00:03:28,556 --> 00:03:30,166
- Door closed.
94
00:03:30,210 --> 00:03:32,342
- Of course.
95
00:03:32,386 --> 00:03:34,518
[Birds chirp, dog barks]
96
00:03:34,562 --> 00:03:36,651
- And Zeljko says, you eat,
97
00:03:36,694 --> 00:03:38,261
you expire pleasured.
98
00:03:38,305 --> 00:03:40,350
[Laughs]
99
00:03:40,394 --> 00:03:42,961
You expire pleasured.
100
00:03:43,005 --> 00:03:44,659
Twyla: Okay.
101
00:03:44,702 --> 00:03:46,487
What are we talking
about today?
102
00:03:46,530 --> 00:03:48,315
More Bosnia stories?
103
00:03:48,358 --> 00:03:50,317
- Yep, she never seems
to run out of 'em.
104
00:03:50,360 --> 00:03:52,797
- Twyla, do you think it might
be too much of an imposition
105
00:03:52,841 --> 00:03:55,278
to ask the chef
to whip me up a kifla?
106
00:03:55,322 --> 00:03:58,586
- What's a kifla?
- Oh, how best to describe it.
107
00:03:58,629 --> 00:04:00,544
- I don't think you need to.
108
00:04:00,588 --> 00:04:02,154
- Hi, y'all!
109
00:04:02,198 --> 00:04:04,156
Oh, Ronnie, Moira,
110
00:04:04,200 --> 00:04:06,115
I see you've ordered
without me, makes sense,
111
00:04:06,158 --> 00:04:08,422
because I was seven
minutes late!
112
00:04:08,465 --> 00:04:11,076
- Well, we've yet to put in our
kifla order, if you're peckish.
113
00:04:11,120 --> 00:04:12,774
- Oh, I can't stay.
114
00:04:12,817 --> 00:04:15,080
I actually might not be able
to make it to rehearsal today.
115
00:04:15,124 --> 00:04:16,908
Roland was supposed
to watch the baby,
116
00:04:16,952 --> 00:04:19,476
but he's got tied up
at the motel, so...
117
00:04:19,520 --> 00:04:21,565
- Oh Jocelyn, if you can't
make it rehearsal,
118
00:04:21,609 --> 00:04:23,219
no one's gonna hold that
against you.
119
00:04:23,263 --> 00:04:24,916
- Yeah, the baby comes first.
120
00:04:24,960 --> 00:04:26,701
- Well, I just feel bad
because we really need
121
00:04:26,744 --> 00:04:28,485
to rehearse that
Nine Inch Nails medley
122
00:04:28,529 --> 00:04:30,444
for our concert
at "Yarn for Cheap."
123
00:04:30,487 --> 00:04:31,836
- I'd be more than happy
124
00:04:31,880 --> 00:04:34,230
to spearhead that effort,
Jocelyn.
125
00:04:34,274 --> 00:04:36,319
After collaborating so closely
with the director on "Crows,"
126
00:04:36,363 --> 00:04:38,669
I feel even more finely attuned
127
00:04:38,713 --> 00:04:41,672
to the fluctuations
of the human condition.
128
00:04:41,716 --> 00:04:43,935
- Okay, it's just, I thought
that was sort of my--
129
00:04:43,979 --> 00:04:46,024
- Even if you miss
a performance, Jocelyn,
130
00:04:46,068 --> 00:04:47,939
there will be others!
131
00:04:47,983 --> 00:04:49,245
- And don't worry
about your solo, Jocelyn.
132
00:04:49,289 --> 00:04:51,029
I know it by heart.
133
00:04:51,073 --> 00:04:53,031
I actually sing it quietly
every time you do it.
134
00:04:53,075 --> 00:04:55,512
- I know, Twyla.
And it's not that quiet.
135
00:04:55,556 --> 00:04:59,037
Anyways, I guess I get
to sit this one out.
136
00:04:59,081 --> 00:05:00,517
[Baby wails]
137
00:05:00,561 --> 00:05:02,302
- Aw, it looks like
somebody's up.
138
00:05:02,345 --> 00:05:03,694
- No rest for the wicked.
139
00:05:03,738 --> 00:05:06,349
- Well, these days,
either he's crying, or I am.
140
00:05:06,393 --> 00:05:08,569
[Laughs] Okay...
141
00:05:08,612 --> 00:05:11,528
see you l-l-later.
142
00:05:11,572 --> 00:05:13,313
Bye! Bye!
143
00:05:13,356 --> 00:05:16,403
I'll get the door!
I'm-I'm sorry, excuse me.
144
00:05:16,446 --> 00:05:18,274
Okay.
145
00:05:18,318 --> 00:05:20,842
Johnny: Welcome to the Rosebud
Motel, Mr. Kaplan.
146
00:05:20,885 --> 00:05:22,234
Johnny Rose,
and it's a pleasure to uh--
147
00:05:22,278 --> 00:05:24,062
- Johnny is our Manager,
148
00:05:24,106 --> 00:05:25,934
so just let me know
if you need anything from him.
149
00:05:25,977 --> 00:05:29,241
And this is Roland, he is our
Guest Services Liaison.
150
00:05:31,200 --> 00:05:34,159
- Yes, and it's actually
pronounced "lee-as-on."
151
00:05:34,203 --> 00:05:36,988
And my name is actually
pronounced "Ro-lahnd."
152
00:05:37,032 --> 00:05:39,426
And if there's anything
you need, please tell me.
153
00:05:39,469 --> 00:05:41,863
Room service, turndown service,
valet service--
154
00:05:41,906 --> 00:05:43,821
- Okay, Ro-lahnd,
those are a few items
155
00:05:43,865 --> 00:05:45,388
that might be tricky
to pull off,
156
00:05:45,432 --> 00:05:47,869
but we do have coffee
and pastries every morning.
157
00:05:47,912 --> 00:05:49,479
- Oh, great, that uh,
158
00:05:49,523 --> 00:05:51,351
that should beat the black
mould I had for breakfast
159
00:05:51,394 --> 00:05:52,656
at my last motel.
160
00:05:52,700 --> 00:05:54,136
- [Laughs uproariously]
161
00:05:54,179 --> 00:05:56,573
- [Laughs]
162
00:05:56,617 --> 00:06:00,882
- Ro-lahnd, why don't you
show Mr. Kaplan to his room?
163
00:06:00,925 --> 00:06:02,971
- Oh yes, formidab-le.
164
00:06:03,014 --> 00:06:05,626
If you would uh,
how do you say,
165
00:06:05,669 --> 00:06:07,845
um, voulez-vous with me please.
166
00:06:07,889 --> 00:06:10,065
I'll show you to your room.
167
00:06:10,108 --> 00:06:12,763
Right this way, we have you
in our most deluxe suite.
168
00:06:12,807 --> 00:06:14,156
Suite number four is uh...
169
00:06:15,984 --> 00:06:17,986
- Ah! Miss Felming...ton.
170
00:06:20,336 --> 00:06:21,468
- Enjoying your stay?
171
00:06:21,511 --> 00:06:23,731
- Yes.
172
00:06:23,774 --> 00:06:25,994
- Okay, Ro-lahnd, Johnny,
173
00:06:26,037 --> 00:06:28,300
we should let our guests
continue chatting.
174
00:06:28,344 --> 00:06:30,259
- Ro-lahnd, this way.
175
00:06:30,302 --> 00:06:31,521
- Here you go.
176
00:06:31,565 --> 00:06:33,218
- Thank you.
177
00:06:36,178 --> 00:06:38,267
- I think you're really
gonna like it here.
178
00:06:38,310 --> 00:06:41,139
It's clean,
and the service is good.
179
00:06:41,183 --> 00:06:42,445
- Yeah.
180
00:06:42,489 --> 00:06:45,230
- Anyway, I'm just staying here
as a guest.
181
00:06:47,015 --> 00:06:48,669
- It's always good to know
who your neighbours are
182
00:06:48,712 --> 00:06:50,322
in a place like this, you know,
183
00:06:50,366 --> 00:06:51,976
it's kind of a roll
of the dice, but uh...
184
00:06:52,020 --> 00:06:53,761
you seem somewhat normal.
185
00:06:53,804 --> 00:06:56,241
- Thank you for saying that.
- Well.
186
00:06:56,285 --> 00:06:58,461
- Everyone agreed
that I was the normal one
187
00:06:58,505 --> 00:07:00,985
in my cellblock
at the women's prison, so.
188
00:07:01,029 --> 00:07:02,813
- Oh, wow. Which prison?
189
00:07:02,857 --> 00:07:04,902
Maybe you know my wife.
190
00:07:04,946 --> 00:07:06,991
I don't-I'm kidding.
I don't have a wife...
191
00:07:07,035 --> 00:07:08,863
anymore.
- Oh, disappeared?
192
00:07:08,906 --> 00:07:10,473
- I'll never stop looking.
193
00:07:10,517 --> 00:07:12,475
I'm Emir.
194
00:07:12,519 --> 00:07:14,346
- Stevie.
- Stevie, hi.
195
00:07:15,826 --> 00:07:17,698
Stevie, nice to meet you.
196
00:07:20,657 --> 00:07:22,529
- Oh, David.
197
00:07:22,572 --> 00:07:24,487
We have a V-VIP staying
with us at the moment.
198
00:07:24,531 --> 00:07:26,576
So do you mind staying
at Patrick's tonight?
199
00:07:26,620 --> 00:07:28,099
Your vibe can be a bit intense.
200
00:07:28,143 --> 00:07:30,580
- Um, excuse me? If anything,
I'm a selling point.
201
00:07:30,624 --> 00:07:32,452
And Patrick's is a no-go.
202
00:07:32,495 --> 00:07:35,498
If fact, he just texted me
the address
203
00:07:35,542 --> 00:07:37,500
of a new apartment
204
00:07:37,544 --> 00:07:40,938
that we might be going to see
together later, so.
205
00:07:40,982 --> 00:07:42,636
- Um, did I leave a Q-tip in,
206
00:07:42,679 --> 00:07:44,464
or did you just tell me
that you guys are getting
207
00:07:44,507 --> 00:07:46,030
an apartment together?
208
00:07:46,074 --> 00:07:47,728
- Hey, we're just going to look.
209
00:07:47,771 --> 00:07:50,644
- Yeah, and Adam Levine and
I just went for bubble tea.
210
00:07:50,687 --> 00:07:53,255
- I'm feeling very apprehensive
about the whole thing,
211
00:07:53,298 --> 00:07:55,953
like, I never saw myself
living with someone.
212
00:07:55,997 --> 00:07:57,346
- That makes total sense,
213
00:07:57,389 --> 00:07:59,087
considering how nobody
you dated ever expressed
214
00:07:59,130 --> 00:08:01,089
any interest in that.
215
00:08:01,132 --> 00:08:03,004
- I'm pretty sure I can
think of someone.
216
00:08:03,047 --> 00:08:05,528
By the end of the day, so.
217
00:08:05,572 --> 00:08:07,922
- David, I think this could
be good for you guys.
218
00:08:09,445 --> 00:08:11,186
And also I know
you're thinking like,
219
00:08:11,229 --> 00:08:13,449
Alexis is becoming
a major girl boss,
220
00:08:13,493 --> 00:08:15,756
and is she just saying this
so she can expand
221
00:08:15,799 --> 00:08:17,453
her home office
when I move out?
222
00:08:17,497 --> 00:08:19,629
- I actually wasn't thinking
that at all.
223
00:08:19,673 --> 00:08:21,501
- Anyway, David,
224
00:08:21,544 --> 00:08:23,633
your boyfriend asked you
to move in with him.
225
00:08:23,677 --> 00:08:25,069
You do it.
226
00:08:26,636 --> 00:08:28,551
- I know.
227
00:08:28,595 --> 00:08:30,335
- Also, do you have like,
a timeframe
228
00:08:30,379 --> 00:08:32,729
as to when that might happen?
229
00:08:32,773 --> 00:08:35,427
- No, I don't.
230
00:08:35,471 --> 00:08:37,168
Jazzagals: Yes! Yeah!
[Clapping]
231
00:08:38,779 --> 00:08:40,955
- Oh my God, so moody.
232
00:08:40,998 --> 00:08:42,783
Love it! Now, Ronnie?
233
00:08:42,826 --> 00:08:44,393
The line has been changed to,
234
00:08:44,436 --> 00:08:46,047
"I want to kiss you
like an animal."
235
00:08:46,090 --> 00:08:48,310
- I'll remember it on the day.
236
00:08:48,353 --> 00:08:51,095
- I say we wrap things up
on a high.
237
00:08:51,139 --> 00:08:53,489
Ladies, scour your closets
for black leather.
238
00:08:53,533 --> 00:08:55,491
Pleather accepted.
239
00:08:55,535 --> 00:08:57,145
[Door creaks open]
240
00:08:57,188 --> 00:08:59,495
- [Panting] I'm here!
241
00:08:59,539 --> 00:09:01,410
I've got a sitter!
242
00:09:01,453 --> 00:09:04,065
- Oh Jocelyn, I'm afraid
that dirigible has ascended.
243
00:09:04,108 --> 00:09:06,502
- But I'm here on time.
244
00:09:06,546 --> 00:09:08,243
- Yes you are,
but we started an hour early.
245
00:09:08,286 --> 00:09:10,419
Ronnie has a massage.
246
00:09:10,462 --> 00:09:12,769
- You moved the rehearsal
for Ronnie's massage?
247
00:09:12,813 --> 00:09:15,380
- Well, it was also conducive
to Twyla's schedule.
248
00:09:15,424 --> 00:09:17,295
- It's hard for her to juggle,
what with the cafe.
249
00:09:17,339 --> 00:09:20,168
- Oh, is it hard for her?
To juggle?
250
00:09:20,211 --> 00:09:22,213
And none of you here
thought to tell me
251
00:09:22,257 --> 00:09:23,780
about this little time change?
252
00:09:23,824 --> 00:09:26,870
- You said you couldn't make it
because of the bebe.
253
00:09:26,914 --> 00:09:28,785
- We could start rehearsal over.
254
00:09:28,829 --> 00:09:30,570
- Ohhh no!
255
00:09:30,613 --> 00:09:33,268
Don't make any changes
on my account,
256
00:09:33,311 --> 00:09:35,444
I mean, you've gotta
get to the cafe,
257
00:09:35,487 --> 00:09:37,141
and Ronnie's gotta
have a massage!
258
00:09:37,185 --> 00:09:38,882
- I have sciatica.
259
00:09:38,926 --> 00:09:41,624
- I ran all over town
looking for a babysitter!
260
00:09:41,668 --> 00:09:42,756
- Oh...
261
00:09:42,799 --> 00:09:44,845
- Pulled a number off
a telephone pole.
262
00:09:44,888 --> 00:09:46,977
She's a pet sitter, but she
said she'd make an exception.
263
00:09:47,021 --> 00:09:49,284
I don't even know
her last name!
264
00:09:49,327 --> 00:09:51,721
- Jocelyn,
that sounds dangersome.
265
00:09:51,765 --> 00:09:54,245
- I didn't wanna miss
this rehearsal!
266
00:09:54,289 --> 00:09:57,118
But do any of you care?
Apparently not!
267
00:09:57,161 --> 00:10:00,687
Because all of you
have been acting...
268
00:10:00,730 --> 00:10:02,732
like bunch of...
269
00:10:02,776 --> 00:10:03,951
b-words!
270
00:10:03,994 --> 00:10:06,040
[Jazzagals gasp]
271
00:10:06,083 --> 00:10:08,825
[Receding footstep thud]
272
00:10:08,869 --> 00:10:10,827
- Okay. Evidently,
273
00:10:10,871 --> 00:10:13,221
one or two of you
have gotten under her skin.
274
00:10:14,831 --> 00:10:16,441
I'll handle it.
275
00:10:18,400 --> 00:10:21,142
[Door opens]
- Hey, Johnny?
276
00:10:21,185 --> 00:10:22,796
Our VIP is still in his room,
277
00:10:22,839 --> 00:10:25,015
so we should probably hold off
on the turndown service.
278
00:10:25,059 --> 00:10:26,843
- What turndown service?
279
00:10:26,887 --> 00:10:28,671
- Oh, that's just a little
something I've initiated
280
00:10:28,715 --> 00:10:31,282
now that I'm Guest Services
Manager.
281
00:10:31,326 --> 00:10:32,675
- I thought you were a liaison.
282
00:10:32,719 --> 00:10:35,286
- No, I gave myself
a promotion.
283
00:10:35,330 --> 00:10:37,071
- Hey Stevie, what's the intel?
284
00:10:37,114 --> 00:10:38,768
- Uh... well, I had a nap,
285
00:10:39,987 --> 00:10:41,815
then a beer,
286
00:10:41,858 --> 00:10:43,686
and now I need $40.
287
00:10:43,730 --> 00:10:45,470
- What are you doing,
buying a wedding dress?
288
00:10:47,429 --> 00:10:49,736
- Uh, Emir would like me
to go to lunch with him.
289
00:10:49,779 --> 00:10:51,781
- What? No!
290
00:10:51,825 --> 00:10:53,565
You don't have to do that!
- Oh, jeez.
291
00:10:53,609 --> 00:10:55,742
- It's fine, it's just lunch.
292
00:10:55,785 --> 00:10:58,092
- No Stevie, this is going
way too far.
293
00:10:58,135 --> 00:11:00,050
- Um, what's going on?
294
00:11:00,094 --> 00:11:01,922
- Oh, Johnny's forcing Stevie
295
00:11:01,965 --> 00:11:05,316
into a very uncomfortable
situation with a strange man.
296
00:11:05,360 --> 00:11:07,101
- Ugh. Okay fine, I'll tap in.
297
00:11:07,144 --> 00:11:08,319
Who are we talking about?
298
00:11:08,363 --> 00:11:11,540
- Emir, and I'm fine to go.
299
00:11:11,583 --> 00:11:13,368
- Stevie, I would go
in your place, it's just,
300
00:11:13,411 --> 00:11:15,718
my afternoon is gonna be
kinda crazy
301
00:11:15,762 --> 00:11:18,199
with all the turndowns.
- No, I want to go!
302
00:11:18,242 --> 00:11:20,375
So can I just have the $50?
303
00:11:20,418 --> 00:11:22,464
- I thought it was $40.
304
00:11:22,507 --> 00:11:24,596
- I also need shampoo.
305
00:11:30,559 --> 00:11:32,126
- Body lice, you know,
from the sheets,
306
00:11:32,169 --> 00:11:33,736
that'll get you a bad review.
307
00:11:33,780 --> 00:11:35,607
I've-I've contracted it
a few times, it's not pretty.
308
00:11:35,651 --> 00:11:37,392
- Wow, what I love
about this conversation
309
00:11:37,435 --> 00:11:39,524
is how well it goes with lunch.
310
00:11:39,568 --> 00:11:41,091
- Yeah, okay, this is not
my A-material.
311
00:11:41,135 --> 00:11:43,180
But then again, I don't
normally ask women out
312
00:11:43,224 --> 00:11:44,791
when I'm on the job.
313
00:11:46,096 --> 00:11:47,881
- Okay, you're telling me
314
00:11:47,924 --> 00:11:49,404
that you review motels
for a living,
315
00:11:49,447 --> 00:11:51,406
and you've never met anyone?
316
00:11:51,449 --> 00:11:53,451
- Okay, this may shock you,
but uh...
317
00:11:55,062 --> 00:11:56,933
a lot of the people
that you meet in motels
318
00:11:56,977 --> 00:11:59,022
are not exactly like...
319
00:11:59,066 --> 00:12:01,111
- Not like what?
320
00:12:01,155 --> 00:12:03,026
- Well, they're not like you.
321
00:12:03,070 --> 00:12:03,853
- Oh, yeah.
322
00:12:03,897 --> 00:12:05,289
Smart, charming,
323
00:12:05,333 --> 00:12:06,856
dazzling sense of humour,
324
00:12:06,900 --> 00:12:08,423
- I was gonna say modest,
but...
325
00:12:08,466 --> 00:12:09,903
[Both laugh]
326
00:12:10,686 --> 00:12:12,557
- So what brings you to town?
327
00:12:12,601 --> 00:12:14,603
- Uh, just driving...
328
00:12:14,646 --> 00:12:16,736
to meet my sister...
329
00:12:16,779 --> 00:12:18,694
in Florida.
330
00:12:20,652 --> 00:12:23,568
Anyway, what about you?
331
00:12:23,612 --> 00:12:26,441
Do you like what you do?
- I do, for the most part.
332
00:12:26,484 --> 00:12:28,486
You know, I like to keep
a low profile
333
00:12:28,530 --> 00:12:29,879
when I'm on the road.
334
00:12:29,923 --> 00:12:31,794
I find if people know that
I'm coming in advance,
335
00:12:31,838 --> 00:12:33,143
they tend to put on a big show,
336
00:12:33,187 --> 00:12:34,841
and I never know
what's genuine, so.
337
00:12:34,884 --> 00:12:37,278
- Yeah, that must be tough.
338
00:12:39,149 --> 00:12:41,195
- Okay, I don't even know where
to start with this menu.
339
00:12:41,238 --> 00:12:43,458
- I'm a plant.
[Sighs heavily]
340
00:12:43,501 --> 00:12:45,416
- I'm sorry?
341
00:12:45,460 --> 00:12:47,157
- You were talking about never
knowing what's genuine,
342
00:12:47,201 --> 00:12:48,680
and uh...
343
00:12:48,724 --> 00:12:50,552
I can't keep this up.
344
00:12:50,595 --> 00:12:52,423
I work at the motel,
345
00:12:54,164 --> 00:12:56,863
and my coworkers thought
it would be a good idea
346
00:12:56,906 --> 00:13:00,127
for me to like,
talk up the motel.
347
00:13:00,170 --> 00:13:03,826
Uh, but the more we talked,
the worse I felt.
348
00:13:04,914 --> 00:13:06,394
[Exhales]
349
00:13:08,831 --> 00:13:12,182
- So you cracked before
we even ordered drinks?
350
00:13:12,226 --> 00:13:15,751
- Yeah. It turns out
I'm really bad at this.
351
00:13:15,795 --> 00:13:17,971
- Ah.
- [Laughs]
352
00:13:18,014 --> 00:13:21,191
Anyway, I'll leave you to lunch.
353
00:13:21,235 --> 00:13:22,540
- Wait, wait, whoa, whoa,
hang-hang on a second.
354
00:13:25,674 --> 00:13:26,980
Okay, look, the problem is,
355
00:13:27,023 --> 00:13:28,851
I eat most of my meals
by myself.
356
00:13:28,895 --> 00:13:31,114
So when there's a beautiful
woman sitting across from me,
357
00:13:31,158 --> 00:13:32,986
even if she is a con artist,
358
00:13:33,029 --> 00:13:35,292
I welcome the company.
359
00:13:35,336 --> 00:13:36,859
Please.
360
00:13:40,950 --> 00:13:42,299
- Okay.
361
00:13:45,433 --> 00:13:47,522
Moira: Gals, let's welcome
our dear friend, Jocelyn,
362
00:13:47,565 --> 00:13:49,002
back into the circle.
363
00:13:49,045 --> 00:13:50,568
- Oh, should we be in a circle?
364
00:13:52,570 --> 00:13:53,833
- It's not top secret,
365
00:13:53,876 --> 00:13:56,487
we all know Jocelyn
has trouble being honest.
366
00:13:56,531 --> 00:13:58,141
- Do we all know that?
367
00:13:58,185 --> 00:14:00,361
- Wrong word, okay.
Authentic.
368
00:14:00,404 --> 00:14:02,493
- I think I can take it
from here, Moira.
369
00:14:02,537 --> 00:14:03,886
- All right, then.
370
00:14:03,930 --> 00:14:06,628
- Gals, since the baby,
371
00:14:06,671 --> 00:14:08,412
things have just been
really tough.
372
00:14:08,456 --> 00:14:10,197
- That's good, that's good,
expand on that.
373
00:14:10,240 --> 00:14:12,460
- Okay, and I feel like
sometimes that my voice
374
00:14:12,503 --> 00:14:14,897
isn't being heard
in this group.
375
00:14:14,941 --> 00:14:16,551
- Touch louder, Jocelyn.
376
00:14:16,594 --> 00:14:18,335
- Just because I don't ask
for your help,
377
00:14:18,379 --> 00:14:20,468
doesn't mean
that I don't need it!
378
00:14:20,511 --> 00:14:22,731
- Just a little more specific,
we're all here to help you.
379
00:14:22,774 --> 00:14:24,559
- Okay, okay, well, Ronnie.
380
00:14:24,602 --> 00:14:27,257
I know that you've been getting
a lot of massages lately,
381
00:14:27,301 --> 00:14:29,259
because they're supposed
to help with your bad back,
382
00:14:29,303 --> 00:14:31,087
and stabilize your mood,
383
00:14:31,131 --> 00:14:32,915
but I haven't noticed
an improvement!
384
00:14:32,959 --> 00:14:35,309
And sometimes you sing
too softly.
385
00:14:35,352 --> 00:14:37,137
- Agree to disagree.
386
00:14:37,180 --> 00:14:38,921
- And Twyla--
- I'm sorry, I'll sing louder.
387
00:14:38,965 --> 00:14:41,141
- Nope, you are singing
too loud.
388
00:14:41,184 --> 00:14:42,751
- Wonderful,
let it out, Jocelyn.
389
00:14:42,794 --> 00:14:44,535
- And Moira.
390
00:14:44,579 --> 00:14:46,363
- Okay, we can stop it there
for today.
391
00:14:46,407 --> 00:14:49,540
- We are all sick and tired
of hearing about Bosnia.
392
00:14:49,584 --> 00:14:51,891
- Yep.
- It's Bosnia this,
393
00:14:51,934 --> 00:14:53,936
and "Crows" that,
and Blajka--
394
00:14:53,980 --> 00:14:55,938
- We're just grasping at straws
now, Jocelyn.
395
00:14:55,982 --> 00:14:57,679
But this has been
a fruitful exercise,
396
00:14:57,722 --> 00:14:59,681
don't we all feel better?
397
00:14:59,724 --> 00:15:02,031
Look at Twyla,
look how moved she is.
398
00:15:03,815 --> 00:15:05,252
- Oh no, I'm fine.
399
00:15:09,691 --> 00:15:11,040
- I've actually seen a few
photos of this place,
400
00:15:11,084 --> 00:15:12,476
it looks pretty good.
401
00:15:12,520 --> 00:15:14,217
- Yeah, the facade would
indicate otherwise,
402
00:15:14,261 --> 00:15:15,697
but I trust you on this.
- Oh.
403
00:15:17,264 --> 00:15:19,701
You know, when I moved here
and got a room with Ray,
404
00:15:19,744 --> 00:15:21,485
I didn't know how long
I was gonna be staying.
405
00:15:21,529 --> 00:15:23,661
- Mhmm...
- And now here we are.
406
00:15:23,705 --> 00:15:26,621
- For me this is bittersweet
because on the one hand,
407
00:15:26,664 --> 00:15:28,710
I could lose you
as a roommate, Patrick,
408
00:15:28,753 --> 00:15:30,886
but on the other,
I would gain the commission.
409
00:15:30,930 --> 00:15:32,583
[Laughs]
410
00:15:34,324 --> 00:15:37,458
As you can see,
this is open concept.
411
00:15:37,501 --> 00:15:40,461
- Oh wow. It's good, eh, David?
412
00:15:40,504 --> 00:15:43,203
- I thought this was
the penthouse.
413
00:15:43,246 --> 00:15:46,119
- Uh, it is the top floor
of three floors.
414
00:15:47,294 --> 00:15:48,730
- You said this was
a one-bedroom.
415
00:15:48,773 --> 00:15:52,038
- It is, in the sense
that it's a one-bed room.
416
00:15:53,343 --> 00:15:54,954
Any more beds,
and you'd be in trouble.
417
00:15:54,997 --> 00:15:58,261
Although bunk beds can be fun.
- Fireplace?
418
00:15:58,305 --> 00:16:01,177
- Yeah, which I'm sure would
heat the room quite quickly,
419
00:16:01,221 --> 00:16:02,874
considering it's just one big...
420
00:16:02,918 --> 00:16:04,920
open space.
421
00:16:04,964 --> 00:16:06,966
- I like the exposed brick.
422
00:16:07,009 --> 00:16:08,924
It's actually a pretty
decent size.
423
00:16:08,968 --> 00:16:11,187
- Yeah. Speaking of size,
424
00:16:11,231 --> 00:16:13,363
Ray, I've yet to see a closet.
425
00:16:13,407 --> 00:16:16,192
Is there a... is there a walk-in
that I'm missing?
426
00:16:16,236 --> 00:16:18,325
- Oh, the closet
is right over here.
427
00:16:20,675 --> 00:16:23,156
This is what small-space
realtors refer to as,
428
00:16:23,199 --> 00:16:25,027
a "step-in" closet.
429
00:16:25,071 --> 00:16:26,942
- What do you think, David?
430
00:16:26,986 --> 00:16:29,858
It's pretty perfect, huh?
- Yeah, it's pretty.
431
00:16:31,947 --> 00:16:33,209
Y-yeah.
432
00:16:33,253 --> 00:16:36,343
♪♪♪
433
00:16:36,386 --> 00:16:38,388
- Not to jeopardize
our review any further,
434
00:16:38,432 --> 00:16:40,477
but would you mind
not blowing my cover?
435
00:16:40,521 --> 00:16:42,131
- Don't worry, I got it.
436
00:16:42,175 --> 00:16:45,178
- Look who's back in da house!
437
00:16:45,221 --> 00:16:47,876
Johnny: Safe and sound,
Ms. Felmington.
438
00:16:47,919 --> 00:16:50,009
Feeling okay about everything?
439
00:16:50,052 --> 00:16:52,011
- That's a weird thing to say,
440
00:16:52,054 --> 00:16:54,665
but yes, I am.
441
00:16:54,709 --> 00:16:56,276
- I turned down your bed
for you,
442
00:16:56,319 --> 00:16:58,104
but I didn't have
any chocolates,
443
00:16:58,147 --> 00:17:00,758
so I left a doggie bag
of pot roast on your pillow.
444
00:17:00,802 --> 00:17:03,065
- Oh. Well, that's uh...
445
00:17:03,109 --> 00:17:05,198
unnecessarily generous of you,
Ro-lahnd.
446
00:17:05,241 --> 00:17:07,765
You know, I did have a couple
of requests, actually.
447
00:17:07,809 --> 00:17:09,463
- Yes, of course.
448
00:17:09,506 --> 00:17:11,378
- I was wondering if Ro-lahnd
could make a reservation
449
00:17:11,421 --> 00:17:13,423
at the cafe tonight
for Ms. Felmington and I?
450
00:17:13,467 --> 00:17:15,077
- Uh... hm!
451
00:17:15,121 --> 00:17:18,254
- Do we have sign-off
from Ms. Felmington?
452
00:17:18,298 --> 00:17:20,691
- We do.
Emir: Great.
453
00:17:20,735 --> 00:17:22,737
One more thing,
you mentioned room service,
454
00:17:22,780 --> 00:17:24,217
I would love an English
breakfast tea to the room,
455
00:17:24,260 --> 00:17:25,914
and maybe one
for Ms. Felmington.
456
00:17:25,957 --> 00:17:27,742
- Oh, absolutely.
457
00:17:27,785 --> 00:17:29,526
Johnny, Emir would
like some tea,
458
00:17:29,570 --> 00:17:31,398
and so would Ms. Felmington.
459
00:17:31,441 --> 00:17:33,095
- Yes, and I'll show you
where you can find that...
460
00:17:33,139 --> 00:17:35,315
Ro-lahnd.
461
00:17:35,358 --> 00:17:37,534
- Mrs. Felmington, may I speak
with you for a minute?
462
00:17:37,578 --> 00:17:39,449
- I'm really tired,
can this wait?
463
00:17:40,972 --> 00:17:43,105
- Mhmm.
464
00:17:43,149 --> 00:17:44,933
Thanks.
465
00:17:44,976 --> 00:17:46,674
Hm.
466
00:17:46,717 --> 00:17:48,328
- So, dinner tonight?
467
00:17:49,590 --> 00:17:51,766
- Yeah, yeah,
if it's all right with you,
468
00:17:51,809 --> 00:17:53,289
I-I wouldn't mind getting
to know the real
469
00:17:53,333 --> 00:17:55,117
Ms. Felmington a little more.
470
00:17:55,161 --> 00:17:57,337
- It is all right with me.
471
00:17:58,599 --> 00:18:00,731
- Although it is a little
unethical,
472
00:18:00,775 --> 00:18:02,081
just between you and I,
473
00:18:02,124 --> 00:18:03,865
so why don't I go write
this review,
474
00:18:03,908 --> 00:18:05,388
and then I won't have
to feel guilty later?
475
00:18:05,432 --> 00:18:07,303
- Okay.
- Okay? All right.
476
00:18:07,347 --> 00:18:09,044
After you.
- Oh! Oh! That's...
477
00:18:09,088 --> 00:18:10,654
not my room.
478
00:18:10,698 --> 00:18:12,047
- Right, yeah, sorry.
I didn't mean to.
479
00:18:15,006 --> 00:18:16,660
- I mean, I know
it's like the first place
480
00:18:16,704 --> 00:18:18,097
that we've looked at, but...
481
00:18:18,140 --> 00:18:20,447
there's just something
very homey about it to me.
482
00:18:20,490 --> 00:18:22,840
- Yeah, a sentiment shared
by inmates,
483
00:18:22,884 --> 00:18:24,581
after their first couple years
in jail.
484
00:18:24,625 --> 00:18:26,409
- Okay, so you hate it.
485
00:18:27,541 --> 00:18:29,891
- No. No.
486
00:18:29,934 --> 00:18:32,372
No, it's just if I've learned
anything from "House Hunters",
487
00:18:32,415 --> 00:18:34,635
you always to see
the loft space,
488
00:18:34,678 --> 00:18:37,203
the charming English cottage,
and the renovated craftsman
489
00:18:37,246 --> 00:18:38,769
that you don't really
wanna take,
490
00:18:38,813 --> 00:18:40,467
but the producers are gonna
force you to see anyway,
491
00:18:40,510 --> 00:18:43,122
before you make
any major decisions.
492
00:18:43,165 --> 00:18:45,689
- Gentlemen, I have one more
thing to show you.
493
00:18:45,733 --> 00:18:47,169
- How are we still
on this fucking tour?!
494
00:18:47,213 --> 00:18:49,084
- Just...
- You'll thank me later,
495
00:18:49,128 --> 00:18:51,826
but uh, no more worrying about
door open, door closed.
496
00:18:51,869 --> 00:18:53,567
All you have to do
is open the curtain...
497
00:18:54,829 --> 00:18:57,658
- [Gasps]
- to the bathroom!
498
00:18:59,921 --> 00:19:02,184
- Ray, can we just have
a moment?
499
00:19:02,228 --> 00:19:04,882
- Absolutely. I'll just wait
in the bathroom.
500
00:19:07,320 --> 00:19:09,148
Curtain open,
or curtain closed?
501
00:19:09,191 --> 00:19:10,366
- Oh, closed!
- Closed, I think.
502
00:19:10,410 --> 00:19:11,585
- Mhmm.
503
00:19:12,977 --> 00:19:14,588
- Don't worry, we'll be putting
a door on there.
504
00:19:14,631 --> 00:19:16,807
- But I don't know if I wanna
put a door on the bathroom!
505
00:19:16,851 --> 00:19:18,679
I don't know
if I love this place.
506
00:19:18,722 --> 00:19:20,246
And I'm not just saying that
507
00:19:20,289 --> 00:19:22,030
because the lack of closet space
508
00:19:22,073 --> 00:19:23,249
will inevitably force us
to break up,
509
00:19:23,292 --> 00:19:25,381
I just sorta feel like...
510
00:19:25,425 --> 00:19:27,383
if we're going to be
moving in together,
511
00:19:27,427 --> 00:19:30,169
we should both
be totally on board.
512
00:19:31,300 --> 00:19:33,563
- I totally understand, David.
513
00:19:35,261 --> 00:19:36,827
- Good.
514
00:19:36,871 --> 00:19:38,525
- It's just that I was looking
at this place like...
515
00:19:40,527 --> 00:19:41,963
just for me.
516
00:19:44,008 --> 00:19:45,793
- Oh.
517
00:19:45,836 --> 00:19:47,534
Okay, it's just that
you had said
518
00:19:47,577 --> 00:19:49,536
that we were going to see
p-places.
519
00:19:49,579 --> 00:19:52,234
- Right, yeah, so like,
more of a general "we".
520
00:19:52,278 --> 00:19:54,410
Because I knew that you'd be
staying over here quite a bit,
521
00:19:54,454 --> 00:19:56,630
and that you'd probably
have an opinion about it.
522
00:19:56,673 --> 00:19:59,198
- Sure. Well then,
you know,
523
00:19:59,241 --> 00:20:02,026
in that case,
if this just for you,
524
00:20:02,070 --> 00:20:03,811
and occasionally me,
- [Laughs]
525
00:20:05,421 --> 00:20:07,597
- I think it's cute.
526
00:20:07,641 --> 00:20:10,209
- Wait, does this mean that you
were ready to move in with me?
527
00:20:11,949 --> 00:20:14,038
- No.
- No? Hmm.
528
00:20:14,082 --> 00:20:16,606
- No, it's a closet space,
and a timing thing.
529
00:20:16,650 --> 00:20:18,478
- Uh-huh. Yeah.
530
00:20:18,521 --> 00:20:21,307
- So... you know, maybe we can
negotiate down the line...
531
00:20:23,047 --> 00:20:24,658
at some point.
- Hmm.
532
00:20:24,701 --> 00:20:26,747
Ray: I can barely hear
your conversation.
533
00:20:28,314 --> 00:20:30,229
Are we sure we want the door?
534
00:20:31,882 --> 00:20:33,536
- Are you sure?
- Up to you.
535
00:20:37,758 --> 00:20:39,368
[Birds chirp]
536
00:20:39,412 --> 00:20:41,631
- There's a little piece
of press you might wanna read.
537
00:20:41,675 --> 00:20:43,764
- Oh, if I've died again,
I swear to God!
538
00:20:43,807 --> 00:20:46,549
- We are a "must-stay".
539
00:20:46,593 --> 00:20:47,985
- What?!
540
00:20:49,857 --> 00:20:51,902
- [Reads] "The Rosebud Motel
is a must-stay
541
00:20:51,946 --> 00:20:54,731
for any road-tripper,
or weary traveller.
542
00:20:54,775 --> 00:20:57,386
This charming,
lovingly restored,
543
00:20:57,430 --> 00:21:00,563
roadside motel is a welcome
pit-stop for anyone
544
00:21:00,607 --> 00:21:03,740
looking for a clean room,
and first-rate hospitality."
545
00:21:03,784 --> 00:21:06,047
- Compared to what,
a haunted house?
546
00:21:06,090 --> 00:21:10,530
- "In fact, Johnny Rose and
his Guest Services Manager,
547
00:21:10,573 --> 00:21:12,706
will go almost too far
out of their way
548
00:21:12,749 --> 00:21:15,056
to ensure a pleasant stay."
549
00:21:15,099 --> 00:21:17,841
- How do I sign up
for this turndown service?
550
00:21:17,885 --> 00:21:19,974
Is there a clipboard,
or something?
551
00:21:20,024 --> 00:21:24,574
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