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1
00:00:02,140 --> 00:00:04,420
We need another fork for the salad.
2
00:00:04,800 --> 00:00:05,956
What difference does it make?
3
00:00:05,980 --> 00:00:07,360
We're entertaining gay men.
4
00:00:07,600 --> 00:00:09,560
They always use separate forks for salad.
5
00:00:09,700 --> 00:00:10,700
It's genetic.
6
00:00:11,080 --> 00:00:12,984
Yeah, well, I happen to
think that using a separate fork
7
00:00:12,985 --> 00:00:15,041
for your salad's a lifestyle
choice, but hey, whatever.
8
00:00:15,860 --> 00:00:17,360
We want everything to be perfect.
9
00:00:17,920 --> 00:00:20,960
Their son is Gus' best friend,
and he doesn't have many friends.
10
00:00:21,540 --> 00:00:22,622
That's because they see
you picking them up, and
11
00:00:22,623 --> 00:00:24,541
they're afraid to come
to the gingerbread house.
12
00:00:25,460 --> 00:00:28,040
They pick Gus up after school every day.
13
00:00:28,200 --> 00:00:31,200
If they didn't watch him till I got home,
I don't know what the hell I'd do.
14
00:00:31,400 --> 00:00:32,400
Yeah, maybe you'd move.
15
00:00:33,440 --> 00:00:35,280
Hey, I don't know why I have to be here
anyway.
16
00:00:36,160 --> 00:00:37,963
Sometimes they're gonna want
to leave Campbell with us, and
17
00:00:37,964 --> 00:00:40,820
they need to know that we're
both good, reliable people.
18
00:00:41,040 --> 00:00:42,040
Hey, I'm reliable.
19
00:00:42,260 --> 00:00:45,260
They see me drinking every night at the
Warsaw at the same time, same table.
20
00:00:45,300 --> 00:00:46,660
I'm like an alcoholic Swiss watch.
21
00:00:47,380 --> 00:00:50,111
This isn't a good situation
for anybody, but we gotta play
22
00:00:50,211 --> 00:00:52,680
the hand we're dealt, and
tonight we gotta pair of queens.
23
00:00:56,200 --> 00:00:59,180
Yeah, well, the fight's on at the Warsaw
tonight, so let's just feed them.
24
00:00:59,580 --> 00:01:02,460
I'll ask them how to spruce up the living
room and get them the hell out.
25
00:01:04,400 --> 00:01:05,400
Hi, Campbell.
26
00:01:06,700 --> 00:01:07,700
Hi, Campbell.
27
00:01:08,120 --> 00:01:09,920
Why don't you take Campbell upstairs and
play?
28
00:01:10,200 --> 00:01:11,636
Yeah, why don't you show him your bug
collection?
29
00:01:11,660 --> 00:01:12,860
I don't have a bug collection.
30
00:01:12,920 --> 00:01:15,480
Why don't you check it out of my bed where
he left the juice box?
31
00:01:16,240 --> 00:01:17,240
Hi.
32
00:01:17,880 --> 00:01:19,720
Drew, this is Russell and Dean.
33
00:01:20,220 --> 00:01:20,220
Hi.
34
00:01:21,000 --> 00:01:22,840
Oh, I love your house.
35
00:01:22,841 --> 00:01:25,200
What you've done is so smart.
36
00:01:25,420 --> 00:01:27,600
Putting your nice stuff in storage until
Gus is older.
37
00:01:29,100 --> 00:01:30,100
Thank you.
38
00:01:30,440 --> 00:01:32,860
Oh, I've got some photos of Campbell
learning to swim.
39
00:01:34,160 --> 00:01:35,160
It is so funny.
40
00:01:35,220 --> 00:01:38,260
He is the spitting image of Russell,
even though they use my sperm.
41
00:01:39,020 --> 00:01:39,260
You know what?
42
00:01:39,360 --> 00:01:41,800
I just remembered I gotta put some cream
in the alfredo sauce.
43
00:01:44,700 --> 00:01:45,160
Hey, Drew.
44
00:01:45,400 --> 00:01:45,540
Hey.
45
00:01:45,920 --> 00:01:47,560
Hey, you remember my niece, the stripper?
46
00:01:47,980 --> 00:01:48,140
Yeah.
47
00:01:48,760 --> 00:01:50,120
Remember my cousin, the secretary?
48
00:01:51,080 --> 00:01:51,740
It's a fun game.
49
00:01:52,100 --> 00:01:53,380
You should, uh, play more often.
50
00:01:53,860 --> 00:01:54,520
Yeah, well, here's the thing.
51
00:01:54,560 --> 00:01:55,720
She's not a stripper anymore.
52
00:01:56,140 --> 00:01:56,780
Oh, really?
53
00:01:56,820 --> 00:01:57,220
That's good.
54
00:01:57,360 --> 00:01:57,920
She's a nice girl.
55
00:01:58,060 --> 00:01:58,640
I'll let you get out of there.
56
00:01:58,780 --> 00:01:58,920
Phew.
57
00:01:59,100 --> 00:01:59,460
Me too.
58
00:01:59,960 --> 00:02:01,620
Anyway, she's a prostitute in Vegas now.
59
00:02:03,340 --> 00:02:05,039
And she told me that
she spent last night with
60
00:02:05,040 --> 00:02:06,560
the Russian boxer
who's in the fight tonight.
61
00:02:07,040 --> 00:02:09,996
They were making love in the shower,
and he slipped and threw out his back.
62
00:02:10,020 --> 00:02:11,748
They had to shoot him
full of Demerol, just so
63
00:02:11,749 --> 00:02:13,400
that he could make a
muscle at the weigh -in.
64
00:02:13,540 --> 00:02:16,640
Yeah, so we're gonna bet on the other
guy, and we're gonna make a fortune, huh?
65
00:02:16,880 --> 00:02:17,060
You in?
66
00:02:17,640 --> 00:02:18,820
Oh, I can't afford it.
67
00:02:18,900 --> 00:02:20,580
I'm raising a kid and a head of cattle
now.
68
00:02:22,680 --> 00:02:23,680
Fair enough.
69
00:02:23,720 --> 00:02:26,216
Hey, at least you want to come to the war
cell and want to fight with us?
70
00:02:26,240 --> 00:02:28,200
Well, if I can get two gay guys to eat
fast, sure.
71
00:02:29,800 --> 00:02:32,160
Hey, if you don't want to hang out with
us, just say so.
72
00:02:33,580 --> 00:02:34,860
No, it's just you guys in there.
73
00:02:35,000 --> 00:02:36,140
They're friends of Mimi's.
74
00:02:36,180 --> 00:02:36,840
They babysit Gus.
75
00:02:37,180 --> 00:02:41,001
She thinks it's important that I have
dinner with them, so... Wait a minute.
76
00:02:41,240 --> 00:02:45,120
You're giving Gus and Mimi a home and
helping support them?
77
00:02:45,121 --> 00:02:46,321
Don't you think that's enough?
78
00:02:46,520 --> 00:02:46,920
You know what?
79
00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:48,900
You're letting her walk all over you.
80
00:02:48,920 --> 00:02:49,120
Yeah.
81
00:02:49,300 --> 00:02:51,352
You should walk right in
there, lay down on the law, and
82
00:02:51,353 --> 00:02:53,660
see what it feels like to be
the man of the house again.
83
00:02:54,480 --> 00:02:57,640
If what you're saying is we should sneak
out the back door, then I agree.
84
00:02:57,920 --> 00:02:59,000
Let's get out of here, too.
85
00:03:00,060 --> 00:03:01,060
Uh-huh.
86
00:03:01,420 --> 00:03:03,520
Where do you think you're going?
87
00:03:04,020 --> 00:03:05,740
You're not sneaking off to the bar,
are you?
88
00:03:06,000 --> 00:03:10,941
Uh, you know, I was, but since you're
watching, I guess all we're doing is leaving.
89
00:03:11,820 --> 00:03:12,560
Oh, that's good.
90
00:03:12,680 --> 00:03:14,820
Well, I'll just tell your nephew that all
men run away.
91
00:03:14,821 --> 00:03:16,560
First his father, and now his uncle.
92
00:03:17,000 --> 00:03:20,260
And when he's looking for love at the
business end of a craft pipe, I'll just
93
00:03:20,261 --> 00:03:24,421
explain to him that his uncle thinks pretty
much anything's more important than he is.
94
00:03:26,280 --> 00:03:27,540
Well, you know what?
95
00:03:28,140 --> 00:03:32,100
Hey, ever since you've lived here,
it's been all about you and what you want.
96
00:03:32,420 --> 00:03:33,680
Well, those days are over.
97
00:03:34,360 --> 00:03:37,660
Now, it's about me and what I want.
98
00:03:48,420 --> 00:03:49,640
Can I have a thigh?
99
00:03:50,100 --> 00:03:51,120
Thighs are for company.
100
00:03:51,260 --> 00:03:52,740
You'll get a wing and you'll like it.
101
00:04:29,140 --> 00:04:32,920
And the swim instructor said that in all
the years he's been giving private lessons
102
00:04:32,921 --> 00:04:36,380
he's never seen a five-year-old swimming
in the water.
103
00:04:38,460 --> 00:04:40,400
Oh, gosh, I'm so sorry.
104
00:04:40,680 --> 00:04:42,480
I've been monopolizing the whole
conversation.
105
00:04:44,940 --> 00:04:46,156
So tell us about yourself, Drew.
106
00:04:46,180 --> 00:04:47,180
What is it that you do?
107
00:04:47,240 --> 00:04:49,100
Uh, I'm an internal expediting analyst.
108
00:04:49,640 --> 00:04:50,760
Oh, that sounds interesting.
109
00:04:50,920 --> 00:04:51,920
Yeah, not till now.
110
00:04:54,220 --> 00:04:57,700
Gus drew a picture of a fish yesterday,
and that was so life-like.
111
00:04:57,940 --> 00:04:58,980
Each scale was shivering.
112
00:04:58,981 --> 00:05:00,116
Hey, I'm gonna do the dishes.
113
00:05:00,140 --> 00:05:00,680
Oh, I'd like to help.
114
00:05:01,140 --> 00:05:02,820
Campbell drew a giraffe in his preschool.
115
00:05:02,860 --> 00:05:03,860
Go, go, go, go, go.
116
00:05:08,140 --> 00:05:09,260
I'm sorry about that.
117
00:05:09,820 --> 00:05:12,736
I love the kid as much as Dean does,
but he can't talk about anything else.
118
00:05:12,760 --> 00:05:14,016
Yeah, Mimi's the same way about Gus.
119
00:05:14,040 --> 00:05:15,240
Everything he does is amazing.
120
00:05:16,420 --> 00:05:19,020
Yesterday, she woke me up to go upstairs
and watch him take a nap.
121
00:05:19,540 --> 00:05:20,580
I was asleep on the couch.
122
00:05:20,760 --> 00:05:22,696
Why didn't she wake him up and come down
and watch me?
123
00:05:22,720 --> 00:05:25,680
Look, I'm sorry if I was in a mood
earlier.
124
00:05:25,820 --> 00:05:28,260
My company was gonna fly me to Vegas to
see the fight tonight.
125
00:05:28,340 --> 00:05:29,000
You got tickets to the fight?
126
00:05:29,140 --> 00:05:29,560
How'd you swing that?
127
00:05:29,720 --> 00:05:31,880
My investment firm manages money for a lot
of athletes.
128
00:05:32,000 --> 00:05:33,600
We do business with one of the fighters.
129
00:05:33,660 --> 00:05:34,660
Oh, that's a coincidence.
130
00:05:34,760 --> 00:05:37,400
I have a friend who's niece does business
with one of the fighters.
131
00:05:38,580 --> 00:05:40,460
This is the main event starting right
about now.
132
00:05:41,880 --> 00:05:44,720
You know, there's a bar down the street
that's showing the fight.
133
00:05:45,360 --> 00:05:46,360
Really?
134
00:05:46,480 --> 00:05:48,600
Yeah, and, you know, it's the weirdest
thing.
135
00:05:49,100 --> 00:05:50,100
We're out of soap.
136
00:05:51,220 --> 00:05:54,700
Oh, well, here, if you take this and you
put a little water in and swish it around,
137
00:05:54,880 --> 00:05:56,920
you should have enough to finish it up
before you...
138
00:05:57,800 --> 00:05:58,800
We're out of soap.
139
00:06:00,380 --> 00:06:01,380
Oh.
140
00:06:01,880 --> 00:06:03,320
Maybe we should go out and get some.
141
00:06:03,380 --> 00:06:05,060
Yeah, but I don't know where the store is.
142
00:06:05,420 --> 00:06:05,900
You know what?
143
00:06:06,160 --> 00:06:08,441
I bet if we stopped at the bar,
they'd be able to tell us.
144
00:06:13,540 --> 00:06:14,680
Here you go.
145
00:06:15,780 --> 00:06:18,020
You know, I haven't seen my boyfriend all
week.
146
00:06:18,420 --> 00:06:19,940
He must be keeping him pretty busy.
147
00:06:19,941 --> 00:06:23,260
Well, I bit him, so when the moon is full,
he turns gay.
148
00:06:25,120 --> 00:06:25,760
I know.
149
00:06:25,840 --> 00:06:26,840
That's not what I mean.
150
00:06:27,020 --> 00:06:29,980
I just wish, you know, I just wish that
Drew had a little bit more stuff.
151
00:06:31,120 --> 00:06:33,035
Maybe next time you're
out, you could just swing by a
152
00:06:33,036 --> 00:06:35,660
men's store and buy him a
pair of pants that aren't beige.
153
00:06:37,000 --> 00:06:41,120
So you think just because I'm gay,
I can pick out fashionable pants?
154
00:06:42,000 --> 00:06:42,620
I'm sorry.
155
00:06:42,980 --> 00:06:44,120
I didn't mean to stereotype.
156
00:06:44,660 --> 00:06:45,240
No, it's okay.
157
00:06:45,380 --> 00:06:46,260
Most of us are pretty good at it.
158
00:06:46,261 --> 00:06:47,501
I was just yanking your change.
159
00:06:48,340 --> 00:06:49,340
Oh, thank God.
160
00:06:49,880 --> 00:06:53,060
Because you are the only one of Drew's
friends who knows how to dress.
161
00:06:57,180 --> 00:06:58,180
No offense, guys.
162
00:06:58,560 --> 00:06:59,280
Oh, none taken.
163
00:06:59,420 --> 00:07:00,580
I found the shirt and a tree.
164
00:07:02,240 --> 00:07:02,820
Hey, Drew.
165
00:07:02,940 --> 00:07:03,940
Hey.
166
00:07:04,840 --> 00:07:06,696
Hey, you never told us how the car show
went last night.
167
00:07:06,720 --> 00:07:07,140
Oh, it's great.
168
00:07:07,320 --> 00:07:09,660
He had VIP passes, so I got to sit in
007's Esta Martin.
169
00:07:09,960 --> 00:07:10,020
Oh.
170
00:07:10,680 --> 00:07:11,320
Which 007?
171
00:07:11,540 --> 00:07:11,980
Timothy Dalton.
172
00:07:12,180 --> 00:07:14,140
They don't let people sit in the Sean
Connery one.
173
00:07:16,180 --> 00:07:16,660
Excuse me.
174
00:07:16,740 --> 00:07:17,740
I got to take this.
175
00:07:18,320 --> 00:07:21,640
Hey, so, uh, did you ever thank your niece
for that big tip on the Russian boxer?
176
00:07:22,100 --> 00:07:23,340
It wasn't her fault.
177
00:07:23,460 --> 00:07:25,380
Who knew a guy full of Demerol could win a
fight?
178
00:07:25,900 --> 00:07:27,256
We thought it would just make him sleepy.
179
00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:28,680
Turns out he couldn't feel a thing.
180
00:07:28,720 --> 00:07:30,131
The other guy just
punched him in the face for
181
00:07:30,132 --> 00:07:32,481
12 rounds till he fell
over from exhaustion.
182
00:07:34,060 --> 00:07:35,060
Yeah, boy.
183
00:07:35,160 --> 00:07:36,360
Thors, drugs, and boxing.
184
00:07:36,760 --> 00:07:38,440
Who'd have thought anything could go
wrong?
185
00:07:39,800 --> 00:07:41,500
We learned an expensive lesson.
186
00:07:41,640 --> 00:07:42,640
We're done with gambling.
187
00:07:43,600 --> 00:07:46,460
You know, Tiger Woods is playing an
attorney in Akron next week.
188
00:07:46,620 --> 00:07:47,900
Maybe we should bet against him.
189
00:07:48,260 --> 00:07:48,580
You're right.
190
00:07:48,760 --> 00:07:49,760
I'll sell my car.
191
00:07:51,160 --> 00:07:52,580
Haven't you guys lost enough money?
192
00:07:53,160 --> 00:07:53,560
Yep.
193
00:07:53,780 --> 00:07:56,120
That's why I'm thinking, we ought to keep
betting.
194
00:07:56,580 --> 00:07:58,280
Any good bookie will
tell you, as long as you
195
00:07:58,281 --> 00:08:00,521
keep gambling, you're
bound to win it big.
196
00:08:01,840 --> 00:08:03,299
Normally, I'd be skeptical,
but I've never heard
197
00:08:03,300 --> 00:08:05,801
of compulsive gamblers
losing twice in a row.
198
00:08:08,280 --> 00:08:09,280
It's unbelievable.
199
00:08:09,940 --> 00:08:12,500
Someone just offered me floor seats to the
Cavs game tonight.
200
00:08:12,501 --> 00:08:13,501
You're kidding.
201
00:08:13,540 --> 00:08:13,760
Yeah.
202
00:08:13,980 --> 00:08:14,980
I wish I could go.
203
00:08:15,460 --> 00:08:17,336
But Dean's meeting me here before we go to
the restaurant.
204
00:08:17,360 --> 00:08:21,300
We're celebrating tonight, because he's
turning 37 and a half.
205
00:08:22,540 --> 00:08:23,780
Who celebrates a half birthday?
206
00:08:24,720 --> 00:08:25,460
Forget about the game.
207
00:08:25,520 --> 00:08:27,596
I'm just telling you we're not going,
because it's stupid.
208
00:08:27,620 --> 00:08:28,020
I know.
209
00:08:28,300 --> 00:08:30,020
But he's stuck at home all day with the
kid.
210
00:08:30,400 --> 00:08:32,473
I guess twice a year, I can
take him to a restaurant and try
211
00:08:32,474 --> 00:08:35,060
to explain to the waitress why
we need half a birthday cake.
212
00:08:35,920 --> 00:08:37,300
These are floor seats.
213
00:08:38,420 --> 00:08:39,960
Seven-foot-tall Serbian could fall in your
lap.
214
00:08:39,961 --> 00:08:41,620
Tell me you haven't thought about that.
215
00:08:42,500 --> 00:08:43,280
No, I'm married.
216
00:08:43,420 --> 00:08:44,420
I'm not dead.
217
00:08:44,720 --> 00:08:45,956
I don't even know why we're disgusting.
218
00:08:45,980 --> 00:08:47,260
Dean's never going to let me go.
219
00:08:47,700 --> 00:08:51,320
Well, you know, telling me I have plans,
I'll just tell her the plans change,
220
00:08:51,500 --> 00:08:51,720
you know?
221
00:08:51,900 --> 00:08:53,540
It's not the meaning of the relationship.
222
00:08:53,860 --> 00:08:55,260
Why are you whispering like a girl?
223
00:08:56,680 --> 00:08:58,320
Look, I'm not telling you what to do.
224
00:08:58,980 --> 00:09:02,400
I'm just saying you can make it up to Dean
some other night, like his three-quarters
225
00:09:02,401 --> 00:09:05,260
or some other make-believe fractional
birthday.
226
00:09:06,480 --> 00:09:06,920
What?
227
00:09:07,420 --> 00:09:08,040
You're right.
228
00:09:08,120 --> 00:09:09,720
If I want to go, I should be able to.
229
00:09:10,380 --> 00:09:10,660
Hey.
230
00:09:11,320 --> 00:09:11,760
Hey.
231
00:09:12,020 --> 00:09:17,340
Would you be terribly hurt if we celebrated
your birthday tomorrow instead of tonight?
232
00:09:17,580 --> 00:09:20,040
The office called like a floor seat to the
Cavs game.
233
00:09:20,180 --> 00:09:21,460
What's the lifetime opportunity?
234
00:09:22,140 --> 00:09:25,000
How many times do you think I'm going to
turn 37 and a half?
235
00:09:26,720 --> 00:09:28,240
Well, I'll tell you what I'll do.
236
00:09:28,480 --> 00:09:32,440
Tomorrow, I'll get tickets to the symphony
and a room at the Ritz-Carlton.
237
00:09:32,500 --> 00:09:33,500
Okay.
238
00:09:34,700 --> 00:09:36,340
And, of course, a bottle of Dom Perignon.
239
00:09:36,420 --> 00:09:38,520
Oh, and did Cyrano here help you come up
with this?
240
00:09:39,020 --> 00:09:40,020
This isn't about Drew.
241
00:09:40,320 --> 00:09:40,620
Oh, really?
242
00:09:41,160 --> 00:09:41,460
Please.
243
00:09:41,860 --> 00:09:42,460
Everything's about Drew.
244
00:09:42,540 --> 00:09:44,016
You've been with him every night this
week.
245
00:09:44,040 --> 00:09:45,040
You have him Tuesday.
246
00:09:46,460 --> 00:09:49,840
Hey, Drew, if you love my husband so much,
why don't you come over and do his laundry
247
00:09:49,841 --> 00:09:52,242
and cook his meals and
hold them when he comes
248
00:09:52,243 --> 00:09:55,341
home shaking because
they're mean to him at work.
249
00:10:00,230 --> 00:10:01,230
Ouch.
250
00:10:01,870 --> 00:10:03,550
Uh, you know what?
251
00:10:03,850 --> 00:10:05,130
Russell, why don't you just take Dean to
the basketball game?
252
00:10:05,131 --> 00:10:07,230
Because he doesn't like anything I like.
253
00:10:07,630 --> 00:10:10,014
We go to Vegas four times
a year to see Cirque du
254
00:10:10,015 --> 00:10:12,631
Soleil, but you won't even
come to one ballgame.
255
00:10:13,770 --> 00:10:14,770
Oh, my God.
256
00:10:15,230 --> 00:10:16,750
Let's never fight in public again.
257
00:10:17,030 --> 00:10:19,110
You know I don't like it when you tell me
what to do.
258
00:10:20,630 --> 00:10:23,690
You told me you thought those acrobats
were world-class athletes.
259
00:10:24,050 --> 00:10:27,370
I was only trying to get you in a decent
mood so I could get some.
260
00:10:27,670 --> 00:10:29,510
Happy half-birthday to you.
261
00:10:29,810 --> 00:10:31,290
Happy half-birthday to you.
262
00:10:31,291 --> 00:10:33,230
No, it's not a happy half-birthday.
263
00:10:33,231 --> 00:10:34,390
It's the worst one ever.
264
00:10:34,930 --> 00:10:36,670
Go to your game, okay?
265
00:10:36,930 --> 00:10:37,930
And you know what?
266
00:10:38,270 --> 00:10:39,870
Don't bother coming home.
267
00:10:40,430 --> 00:10:42,350
You might as well just spend the night at
Drew's.
268
00:10:43,890 --> 00:10:44,890
Uh,
269
00:10:48,340 --> 00:10:51,000
you know, I don't think my female
girlfriend would appreciate that.
270
00:10:52,540 --> 00:10:55,541
You know, you're always
talking about your female
271
00:10:55,542 --> 00:10:58,601
girlfriend, but how come
you never bring her a room?
272
00:11:18,980 --> 00:11:20,100
Tick a champ.
273
00:11:28,560 --> 00:11:29,560
Dean left me.
274
00:11:29,860 --> 00:11:32,460
He took Campbell to move back to his
parents' house in Youngstown.
275
00:11:32,720 --> 00:11:34,340
Well, why the hell would he do that?
276
00:11:34,500 --> 00:11:36,980
Because I blew off his half-birthday and
took Drew to the game.
277
00:11:37,560 --> 00:11:38,600
I guess it was a big deal.
278
00:11:39,720 --> 00:11:40,580
Oh, don't worry.
279
00:11:40,640 --> 00:11:41,120
He'll be back.
280
00:11:41,660 --> 00:11:44,580
I mean, there's not even enough culture
for straight people in Youngstown.
281
00:11:44,880 --> 00:11:45,880
I hope you're right.
282
00:11:46,040 --> 00:11:48,040
Listen, do you want these tickets for the
Cavs game tonight?
283
00:11:48,041 --> 00:11:49,440
I'm the no-moo to go.
284
00:11:49,940 --> 00:11:50,940
You should take Kelly.
285
00:11:51,620 --> 00:11:53,200
Don't take her for granted, Drew.
286
00:11:53,520 --> 00:11:53,820
Yeah.
287
00:11:54,200 --> 00:11:55,200
All right.
288
00:11:55,640 --> 00:11:56,880
Uh, hey, listen.
289
00:11:57,520 --> 00:12:00,207
Uh, in the future, any
shot that Dean might drive
290
00:12:00,208 --> 00:12:02,841
in from Youngstown and
pick my kid up from school?
291
00:12:02,980 --> 00:12:04,300
He said he's never coming back.
292
00:12:05,060 --> 00:12:06,060
I'll see ya.
293
00:12:06,140 --> 00:12:06,340
Yeah.
294
00:12:07,140 --> 00:12:08,140
Bye-bye.
295
00:12:11,640 --> 00:12:12,080
Wow.
296
00:12:12,620 --> 00:12:13,620
He's really shook up.
297
00:12:13,840 --> 00:12:15,480
He even forgot to give me parking passes.
298
00:12:16,280 --> 00:12:21,400
All I said was be nice to the gay couple,
not create a three-man love triangle.
299
00:12:21,900 --> 00:12:22,940
Hey, I didn't do anything.
300
00:12:23,020 --> 00:12:24,380
I can't help it if Dean's jealous.
301
00:12:24,460 --> 00:12:25,900
What, you think I can turn this off?
302
00:12:26,980 --> 00:12:28,500
Well, what are you gonna do about Gus?
303
00:12:29,060 --> 00:12:30,636
Because I can't take time off to watch
him.
304
00:12:30,660 --> 00:12:31,900
I don't have any vacation left.
305
00:12:32,060 --> 00:12:33,100
Do you think of something?
306
00:12:33,220 --> 00:12:33,520
Yeah.
307
00:12:34,000 --> 00:12:35,000
I just did.
308
00:12:35,880 --> 00:12:40,500
Since we can't afford daycare and this is
your fault, you're gonna use your vacation
309
00:12:40,501 --> 00:12:43,140
days to watch Gus until I can figure
something out.
310
00:12:43,600 --> 00:12:45,380
Oh, thanks for the tickets.
311
00:13:04,000 --> 00:13:04,540
Hey, you know what?
312
00:13:04,880 --> 00:13:05,880
I'm kind of tired.
313
00:13:05,960 --> 00:13:06,960
Why don't we play a game?
314
00:13:07,280 --> 00:13:07,520
All right?
315
00:13:07,900 --> 00:13:11,940
Why don't we see who can lay down for the
longest with their eyes closed?
316
00:13:12,500 --> 00:13:13,080
I bet I win.
317
00:13:13,360 --> 00:13:14,360
Okay.
318
00:13:29,070 --> 00:13:30,070
Okay, you win.
319
00:13:30,290 --> 00:13:31,290
Let's play again.
320
00:13:31,710 --> 00:13:32,270
No, you know what?
321
00:13:32,290 --> 00:13:34,530
Why don't you go watch some of your mind
-numbing videos?
322
00:13:35,770 --> 00:13:36,770
I'm hungry.
323
00:13:37,070 --> 00:13:37,650
How can you be hungry?
324
00:13:37,810 --> 00:13:39,406
I just made you a grilled cheese sandwich.
325
00:13:39,430 --> 00:13:40,430
You used white cheese.
326
00:13:40,630 --> 00:13:41,630
I like yellow cheese.
327
00:13:42,050 --> 00:13:43,630
Well, if you didn't eat it, then where is
it?
328
00:13:43,631 --> 00:13:46,030
I stuck it in your bowling ball holes.
329
00:13:48,090 --> 00:13:50,770
I thought I told you yesterday not to do
that anymore.
330
00:13:51,370 --> 00:13:52,530
You didn't tell me today.
331
00:13:56,530 --> 00:14:00,890
I will give you $50 if you just let me
take a nap.
332
00:14:03,470 --> 00:14:04,470
No.
333
00:14:05,030 --> 00:14:05,590
All right.
334
00:14:05,930 --> 00:14:08,650
Then why don't you go get a real hammer
and let's get this over with.
335
00:14:10,330 --> 00:14:11,330
Hey.
336
00:14:11,530 --> 00:14:12,530
Hey.
337
00:14:12,690 --> 00:14:13,690
Um, hi, Gus.
338
00:14:14,210 --> 00:14:15,210
Hi, Kelly.
339
00:14:16,650 --> 00:14:18,130
So, what's going on, you guys?
340
00:14:18,290 --> 00:14:18,630
Where's Mimi?
341
00:14:18,990 --> 00:14:19,990
She's not home yet.
342
00:14:20,250 --> 00:14:23,146
Gus, why don't you go upstairs and flush
another one of my ties down the toilet?
343
00:14:23,170 --> 00:14:24,170
Yeah!
344
00:14:26,530 --> 00:14:28,050
Drew, what's going on?
345
00:14:28,090 --> 00:14:29,490
We have dinner reservations at 6.
346
00:14:29,570 --> 00:14:30,626
You were supposed to be ready.
347
00:14:30,650 --> 00:14:31,050
I'm sorry.
348
00:14:31,510 --> 00:14:33,110
I don't think I'm gonna make it tonight.
349
00:14:33,490 --> 00:14:34,550
Oh, come on, Drew.
350
00:14:34,551 --> 00:14:36,150
I was really looking forward to this.
351
00:14:36,250 --> 00:14:37,630
I've been working all week.
352
00:14:37,750 --> 00:14:39,810
Oh, and watching a child all day isn't
working?
353
00:14:41,110 --> 00:14:42,810
I didn't say that.
354
00:14:42,970 --> 00:14:43,970
Well, you didn't have to.
355
00:14:44,470 --> 00:14:48,330
Drew, you need a night out.
356
00:14:48,970 --> 00:14:49,970
I'll drive.
357
00:14:50,510 --> 00:14:51,510
I'll pay.
358
00:14:52,110 --> 00:14:55,711
Why don't you just go and put on those nice
pair of pants that you and Russell bought?
359
00:14:56,050 --> 00:14:57,050
They make me look fat.
360
00:15:00,990 --> 00:15:04,810
Okay, Drew, you can't keep going on like
this.
361
00:15:05,270 --> 00:15:06,270
Sure I can.
362
00:15:06,350 --> 00:15:08,290
I have six glorious days of vacation left.
363
00:15:08,291 --> 00:15:10,990
Well, maybe Russell and Dean will get back
together.
364
00:15:11,670 --> 00:15:13,590
Russell says Dean isn't even returning his
calls.
365
00:15:14,310 --> 00:15:17,090
Well, maybe you should just go and talk to
Dean.
366
00:15:18,830 --> 00:15:20,610
Yeah, well, it is a vacation day.
367
00:15:21,590 --> 00:15:24,970
A drive to picturesque Youngstown sure
would put a capper on it.
368
00:15:27,790 --> 00:15:28,790
Sorry I'm late.
369
00:15:29,990 --> 00:15:30,990
Traffic is lousy.
370
00:15:31,170 --> 00:15:32,930
I don't suppose you made anything for
dinner.
371
00:15:34,270 --> 00:15:37,090
No, but you can suck a grilled cheese out
of my bowling ball.
372
00:16:07,230 --> 00:16:08,230
Hi, I'm Drew Carey.
373
00:16:08,370 --> 00:16:09,890
I came to see if Dean was around.
374
00:16:10,470 --> 00:16:11,470
Oh, you're Drew.
375
00:16:12,370 --> 00:16:15,090
Busted up my son's marriage over some
basketball tickets.
376
00:16:16,570 --> 00:16:18,310
Did he mention there were floor seats,
sir?
377
00:16:19,610 --> 00:16:21,210
It's a whole different speed down there.
378
00:16:22,650 --> 00:16:23,890
Dean has nothing to say to you.
379
00:16:24,070 --> 00:16:25,590
Come on, give me five minutes.
380
00:16:28,010 --> 00:16:33,491
Okay, you know, now that you're in my house,
anything I'd do to you is self -defense.
381
00:16:35,510 --> 00:16:37,050
And you're Dean's dad, huh?
382
00:16:37,710 --> 00:16:40,710
I guess that settles the nature-nurture
question, doesn't it?
383
00:16:41,970 --> 00:16:44,450
Dad, I'm 37 and a half.
384
00:16:44,630 --> 00:16:46,110
I don't need you to fight my battles.
385
00:16:46,930 --> 00:16:50,650
I was just trying to be sensitive to your
delicate emotional state.
386
00:16:51,310 --> 00:16:54,270
Don't let him get outside, because then
legally we can't do nothing.
387
00:16:58,810 --> 00:16:59,990
What are you doing here?
388
00:16:59,991 --> 00:17:01,930
I came to apologize.
389
00:17:02,310 --> 00:17:04,951
I should have never got involved in your
relationship with Russell.
390
00:17:05,270 --> 00:17:05,810
That's right.
391
00:17:06,110 --> 00:17:07,110
You shouldn't have.
392
00:17:07,710 --> 00:17:10,650
You have no idea what my life is like.
393
00:17:11,490 --> 00:17:13,150
You mean being Ron Reagan all day?
394
00:17:13,970 --> 00:17:17,135
Thought a moment to
yourself without getting even
395
00:17:17,136 --> 00:17:19,851
the slightest bit of
credit or understanding.
396
00:17:20,150 --> 00:17:24,746
Wanting just once, just for
one night to go out and be with
397
00:17:24,747 --> 00:17:28,750
adults and have fun and feel
attractive and be pampered?
398
00:17:31,630 --> 00:17:34,950
You may look like a mean old lesbian,
but you're a sensitive guy.
399
00:17:36,670 --> 00:17:39,150
I just want to tell you that what you do
is great.
400
00:17:39,230 --> 00:17:40,230
I think you're a hero.
401
00:17:42,190 --> 00:17:43,210
Oh, thank you.
402
00:17:45,070 --> 00:17:46,730
So Campbell and I make cupcakes today.
403
00:17:46,770 --> 00:17:47,210
Do you want one?
404
00:17:47,650 --> 00:17:49,506
Oh, you know, Gus and I made cupcakes the
other day.
405
00:17:49,530 --> 00:17:49,690
Yeah?
406
00:17:49,790 --> 00:17:50,470
Little faces on them.
407
00:17:50,550 --> 00:17:51,846
I ate one and he called me a killer.
408
00:17:51,870 --> 00:17:52,870
He cried for an hour.
409
00:17:54,470 --> 00:17:55,470
That's adorable.
410
00:17:57,530 --> 00:17:59,050
You know Campbell misses Gus.
411
00:17:59,051 --> 00:18:01,330
And Gus misses Campbell.
412
00:18:02,030 --> 00:18:03,150
And Russell misses Campbell.
413
00:18:03,730 --> 00:18:05,010
And Russell misses Dean.
414
00:18:06,330 --> 00:18:07,390
Well, I miss him too.
415
00:18:08,130 --> 00:18:09,446
Well, don't you think you two should be
together?
416
00:18:09,470 --> 00:18:09,710
No.
417
00:18:10,170 --> 00:18:11,810
Not until he stops taking me for granted.
418
00:18:12,510 --> 00:18:14,846
Well, maybe he had a little visit from the
common sense fairy.
419
00:18:14,870 --> 00:18:15,950
I mean, I don't mean fairy.
420
00:18:16,030 --> 00:18:16,370
Oh, damn.
421
00:18:16,710 --> 00:18:21,346
You know, I had a little
talk with Russell and I
422
00:18:21,347 --> 00:18:24,770
think you might see
things a little differently now.
423
00:18:25,210 --> 00:18:26,210
Oh, Russell.
424
00:18:31,740 --> 00:18:32,740
Hello, Dean.
425
00:18:34,580 --> 00:18:35,580
Hello.
426
00:18:37,740 --> 00:18:38,740
I'm sorry.
427
00:18:38,980 --> 00:18:41,060
I should have been more considerate of
your feelings.
428
00:18:41,740 --> 00:18:45,140
I should have communicated to you that I
wanted to do some more guy things.
429
00:18:46,040 --> 00:18:47,800
Okay, and I...
430
00:18:47,801 --> 00:18:52,701
Well, I suppose I can give you more freedom
as long as you don't forget about us.
431
00:18:54,300 --> 00:18:55,300
See?
432
00:18:55,600 --> 00:18:57,680
Now you're understanding each other's
needs a little more.
433
00:18:57,681 --> 00:18:58,420
That's great.
434
00:18:58,580 --> 00:19:02,440
That'll lead to an even stronger,
you know, unrecognized marriage.
435
00:19:08,140 --> 00:19:10,700
So, Tiger won again, huh?
436
00:19:11,160 --> 00:19:12,160
Yeah.
437
00:19:12,320 --> 00:19:13,320
With concentration.
438
00:19:14,560 --> 00:19:16,080
So, what'd your bookie say about that?
439
00:19:17,160 --> 00:19:18,520
He was very supportive.
440
00:19:18,980 --> 00:19:21,400
He said, you know, hang in there and he
upped our limit.
441
00:19:23,280 --> 00:19:24,636
He's got another tournament in two weeks.
442
00:19:24,660 --> 00:19:27,880
Let's see how good Tiger is when a cherry
bomb goes off in his bag, huh?
443
00:19:30,700 --> 00:19:31,700
I'll get him.
444
00:19:38,730 --> 00:19:40,750
If he's no Tiger Woods, I'll tell you
then.
445
00:19:48,910 --> 00:19:49,470
Hey, guys.
446
00:19:49,930 --> 00:19:51,226
Good to see you guys back together again.
447
00:19:51,250 --> 00:19:51,390
Thanks.
448
00:19:51,530 --> 00:19:52,190
Things are good with us.
449
00:19:52,490 --> 00:19:54,730
Oh, before we go, I just want to say
goodbye to Campbell.
450
00:19:55,030 --> 00:19:56,030
Hey, sweetie.
451
00:19:57,230 --> 00:20:01,510
Daddy and daddy are going on a cruise
now, and we'll see you in six days, okay?
452
00:20:02,810 --> 00:20:04,730
Uh, this is about six days.
453
00:20:05,250 --> 00:20:05,730
Oh, the cruise.
454
00:20:06,150 --> 00:20:08,710
Mimi said you wouldn't mind watching
Campbell while we were gone.
455
00:20:10,430 --> 00:20:12,250
Come on.
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