Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,310 --> 00:00:02,790
I can't believe what bought you this.
2
00:00:02,870 --> 00:00:05,610
I wish I had a gait life partner who'd buy
me a satellite dish.
3
00:00:06,950 --> 00:00:09,530
Yeah, but then you'd have to worry about
the INS busting your fake marriage scam
4
00:00:09,531 --> 00:00:11,411
and throwing you jail for the rest of your
life.
5
00:00:12,030 --> 00:00:13,670
Still, look how clear that picture is.
6
00:00:15,790 --> 00:00:19,330
Man, I've been living with someone of the
same sex for years and all I ever get is
7
00:00:19,331 --> 00:00:21,590
breakfast and bed and the occasional foot
massage.
8
00:00:23,230 --> 00:00:25,290
Which I practically have to beg for.
9
00:00:26,730 --> 00:00:28,970
That's just because I can't get the smell
off my hands.
10
00:00:31,310 --> 00:00:32,310
Enough.
11
00:00:32,650 --> 00:00:33,650
Ah, that's disgusting.
12
00:00:34,070 --> 00:00:35,870
Does anyone know what channel the game's
on?
13
00:00:36,410 --> 00:00:38,190
Oh, Kate, there's only 500 channels.
14
00:00:38,270 --> 00:00:39,270
How hard could it be?
15
00:00:41,190 --> 00:00:44,150
Date line, date line, date line.
16
00:00:45,070 --> 00:00:51,870
Wings, wings, date line, wings,
date line, date line, wings.
17
00:00:52,530 --> 00:00:53,530
Hey, golden girls!
18
00:00:55,370 --> 00:00:58,952
Well, if only there was some enchanted
book that told you
19
00:00:58,953 --> 00:01:01,510
all the images
that were going to be on the magic screen.
20
00:01:03,150 --> 00:01:04,150
Make room, make room.
21
00:01:04,290 --> 00:01:06,350
The UK Interpub Dart Championship is on.
22
00:01:06,470 --> 00:01:07,870
It's going to be quite a spectacle.
23
00:01:08,150 --> 00:01:10,590
Cornwall and Pennington are going to have
to hammer in tongue.
24
00:01:12,250 --> 00:01:13,610
That's what the British put on TV.
25
00:01:14,270 --> 00:01:15,510
They need handguns over there.
26
00:01:17,070 --> 00:01:20,410
Actually, darts has twice the excitement
of American basketball.
27
00:01:24,850 --> 00:01:32,470
Cornwall cites the bullseye...
measuring... measuring...
28
00:01:33,190 --> 00:01:33,630
That's it.
29
00:01:33,750 --> 00:01:34,750
We're not watching darts.
30
00:01:35,790 --> 00:01:37,790
And, Bill, look at the teeth on those
cheerleaders.
31
00:01:42,080 --> 00:01:43,480
What are you doing here anyway?
32
00:01:43,680 --> 00:01:45,102
It's not like the INS
is going to come by and
33
00:01:45,103 --> 00:01:46,660
spring a surprise visit
on you on Sunday night.
34
00:01:46,820 --> 00:01:47,820
Oh, no, no, no.
35
00:01:47,860 --> 00:01:51,180
They usually call a couple of days in
advance and say, We'll be round at three.
36
00:01:51,300 --> 00:01:52,880
Get your fake gay marriage together.
37
00:01:55,040 --> 00:01:56,300
Why don't you just go home?
38
00:01:56,540 --> 00:01:56,720
No!
39
00:01:57,060 --> 00:01:58,380
I have to clean out our basement.
40
00:01:59,380 --> 00:02:00,380
Our basement?
41
00:02:01,760 --> 00:02:02,760
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
42
00:02:03,140 --> 00:02:04,820
What are you doing rearranging my
basement?
43
00:02:05,500 --> 00:02:07,380
Well, I'm turning it into an exercise
room.
44
00:02:07,640 --> 00:02:11,120
I'm going to put mirrors on all the walls
so I can watch myself jazzercise.
45
00:02:12,460 --> 00:02:14,780
If I don't know what wiggles, I don't know
what to work on.
46
00:02:16,920 --> 00:02:18,860
Look, you're not rearranging anything,
okay?
47
00:02:19,340 --> 00:02:20,400
You don't live here.
48
00:02:21,040 --> 00:02:21,440
Fine.
49
00:02:21,760 --> 00:02:23,120
I'll exercise here in the kitchen.
50
00:02:25,780 --> 00:02:28,293
Look, I know we both
have a lot to lose here, but
51
00:02:28,373 --> 00:02:30,140
if the INS comes by,
can I just cover for you?
52
00:02:30,200 --> 00:02:32,400
I'll tell them my husband's out getting
flavored coffee.
53
00:02:33,660 --> 00:02:34,960
No, that wouldn't work.
54
00:02:35,140 --> 00:02:36,760
These people detect fraud for a living.
55
00:02:37,040 --> 00:02:38,320
I'm afraid you're stuck with me.
56
00:02:39,360 --> 00:02:40,729
You know, I got to
tell you, even though it did
57
00:02:40,730 --> 00:02:43,201
get me my job back,
I am so sorry I did this.
58
00:02:43,680 --> 00:02:44,360
Well, too late.
59
00:02:44,520 --> 00:02:45,060
We are married.
60
00:02:45,440 --> 00:02:47,140
Would our vows just words to you?
61
00:02:49,380 --> 00:02:50,900
See, look, you're my boss.
62
00:02:51,300 --> 00:02:52,820
I don't want to fight, okay?
63
00:02:52,821 --> 00:02:55,100
Just go down and exercise in the basement
if you want to.
64
00:02:55,200 --> 00:02:56,200
Thank you.
65
00:03:00,020 --> 00:03:00,420
Great.
66
00:03:00,820 --> 00:03:02,840
I just saved my fake gay marriage.
67
00:03:05,580 --> 00:03:06,780
I guess life does begin at 40.
68
00:03:39,220 --> 00:03:52,640
Hey, hey there.
69
00:03:53,060 --> 00:03:53,760
It must be Mr. Dax.
70
00:03:53,840 --> 00:03:54,840
I'm sorry I'm late.
71
00:03:55,260 --> 00:03:56,776
My boss took my last pair of clean
underwear.
72
00:03:56,800 --> 00:03:58,200
I had to stay and do an extra load.
73
00:04:01,460 --> 00:04:02,220
Yeah, let me explain.
74
00:04:02,380 --> 00:04:05,840
See, my boss spent the night, so... Yeah,
let me explain.
75
00:04:06,020 --> 00:04:08,080
Because, see, we're married.
76
00:04:09,380 --> 00:04:10,220
Ah, forget it.
77
00:04:10,260 --> 00:04:11,260
You're hired.
78
00:04:13,880 --> 00:04:15,860
Mr. Wick spent the night at your house,
huh?
79
00:04:16,140 --> 00:04:19,100
So you finally slapped a little English
leather on your face.
80
00:04:22,460 --> 00:04:23,680
Don't start with me.
81
00:04:24,800 --> 00:04:27,680
He's spraying his ankle jazzersizing,
so he couldn't drive home.
82
00:04:27,800 --> 00:04:29,280
He spent the night soaking in my tub.
83
00:04:29,940 --> 00:04:31,275
By the way, I'm sorry
I smell like a little bit
84
00:04:31,276 --> 00:04:33,341
like cologne,
but I was afraid he'd take a shower.
85
00:04:34,780 --> 00:04:38,360
Well, whatever he soaked him in,
keep it up, and he's wearing a great mood.
86
00:04:39,020 --> 00:04:39,300
What?
87
00:04:39,520 --> 00:04:42,080
Instead of tearing you a new one,
he's widening the one you have?
88
00:04:43,920 --> 00:04:46,136
No, he's encouraging
and supportive, and he
89
00:04:46,137 --> 00:04:49,321
only took up one handicap
spot this morning.
90
00:04:51,040 --> 00:04:53,521
Carrot, what's
all this about Mars from accounting,
91
00:04:53,522 --> 00:04:55,620
wanting to take a week
off for a honeymoon?
92
00:04:55,920 --> 00:04:58,320
I think we can arrange to give her a
little more than a week.
93
00:04:59,140 --> 00:05:00,380
Oh, see, business as usual.
94
00:05:00,580 --> 00:05:02,596
I'll start the termination papers right
away, Mr. Wick.
95
00:05:02,620 --> 00:05:04,260
No, no, no, I'm not talking about firing.
96
00:05:04,340 --> 00:05:05,860
I'm talking about giving her more than a
week.
97
00:05:05,861 --> 00:05:11,160
I say we give her three weeks,
with pay, and tell her she can go down to
98
00:05:11,161 --> 00:05:13,920
lingerie and pick out the whorish
undergarment of her choice.
99
00:05:16,560 --> 00:05:17,560
See?
100
00:05:17,600 --> 00:05:17,860
Wow.
101
00:05:18,620 --> 00:05:19,432
I know people like
to wear other people's
102
00:05:19,433 --> 00:05:21,981
underwear, but mine's
hitting him like a drug.
103
00:05:22,940 --> 00:05:24,680
Attention, Winfred Louder employees.
104
00:05:25,320 --> 00:05:28,700
As a thank you for all your hard work,
let's have a little me time.
105
00:05:29,160 --> 00:05:31,520
In your top drawer, you'll find a velvet
eye pillow.
106
00:05:32,060 --> 00:05:35,640
And now, let's all listen to the whales
serenade each other.
107
00:05:44,520 --> 00:05:45,940
That's kind of weird, Mr. Wick.
108
00:05:46,960 --> 00:05:47,960
Shh.
109
00:05:55,280 --> 00:05:56,700
Oh, my God, it's a cult.
110
00:05:59,220 --> 00:06:01,980
Wake up, you fools, there's no spaceship
behind the moon.
111
00:06:05,420 --> 00:06:07,240
Joe, this is creeping me out.
112
00:06:07,520 --> 00:06:09,400
Let's get out of here and explain it over
lunch.
113
00:06:09,760 --> 00:06:10,760
Hello.
114
00:06:11,420 --> 00:06:12,420
Crap.
115
00:06:12,460 --> 00:06:13,740
Now I gotta go back to work.
116
00:06:19,660 --> 00:06:21,096
Sorry, I can't go to lunch with you.
117
00:06:21,120 --> 00:06:22,640
I came in late and I have to catch up.
118
00:06:22,940 --> 00:06:24,260
No, don't be silly, Drew.
119
00:06:24,740 --> 00:06:27,380
Your friends went to all the trouble of
coming downtown to see you.
120
00:06:27,440 --> 00:06:28,440
That's very special.
121
00:06:28,740 --> 00:06:28,920
They are.
122
00:06:29,040 --> 00:06:29,460
They are special.
123
00:06:29,800 --> 00:06:31,900
Well, we're all special.
124
00:06:34,420 --> 00:06:35,820
Drew, is he wearing your underwear?
125
00:06:38,340 --> 00:06:39,880
I don't blame you for being confused.
126
00:06:40,060 --> 00:06:41,060
I'm surprising myself.
127
00:06:41,400 --> 00:06:43,681
Why don't we all go out to lunch and
celebrate the new me?
128
00:06:44,060 --> 00:06:45,340
We can go to Le Chateau.
129
00:06:46,260 --> 00:06:47,720
Oh, well, that's a fancy place.
130
00:06:48,000 --> 00:06:50,360
When your food's ready, they call your
number out in French.
131
00:06:52,780 --> 00:06:56,400
Listen, no offense, but we did spend the
last 24 hours together.
132
00:06:57,040 --> 00:06:58,040
I need a little break.
133
00:06:58,100 --> 00:07:00,020
Besides, my friends just came out just to
see me.
134
00:07:00,580 --> 00:07:01,580
My treat?
135
00:07:02,080 --> 00:07:03,080
Can Drew come?
136
00:07:05,980 --> 00:07:07,180
Well, it's not a deal breaker.
137
00:07:10,760 --> 00:07:14,680
Look, if you want to go have a free lunch,
fine with me.
138
00:07:14,681 --> 00:07:16,920
I'll meet you at the Warsaw tonight to
watch the fight.
139
00:07:17,240 --> 00:07:18,240
Okay.
140
00:07:19,100 --> 00:07:21,460
Well, if you realize, I'm not coming,
don't you?
141
00:07:22,080 --> 00:07:23,080
Yeah, sure.
142
00:07:24,040 --> 00:07:25,040
Wait, guys.
143
00:07:25,560 --> 00:07:26,560
Wait a second.
144
00:07:27,180 --> 00:07:29,100
Drew, what are you gonna do for lunch?
145
00:07:30,080 --> 00:07:32,816
Well, I guess I'll just get a baloney
sandwich out of the vending machine.
146
00:07:32,840 --> 00:07:34,200
I needed a loan to the men's room.
147
00:07:35,940 --> 00:07:37,360
As long as you eat, sweetie.
148
00:07:37,361 --> 00:07:39,800
One, four,
149
00:08:02,100 --> 00:08:03,960
get out of here with you.
150
00:08:04,360 --> 00:08:06,180
And don't come back now, boy.
151
00:08:07,580 --> 00:08:08,700
Drew, what are you doing up?
152
00:08:16,390 --> 00:08:18,290
Have any idea what time it is?
153
00:08:18,550 --> 00:08:19,550
Here in London.
154
00:08:21,250 --> 00:08:22,290
We were at a pub.
155
00:08:23,770 --> 00:08:25,350
Well, does this pub have a phone?
156
00:08:26,070 --> 00:08:27,270
Because the Warsaw does.
157
00:08:27,690 --> 00:08:31,190
I know, because I was there from 8 o'clock
until 11.30.
158
00:08:31,570 --> 00:08:32,810
They also have a clock.
159
00:08:35,250 --> 00:08:36,610
But, Drew, I called you.
160
00:08:36,990 --> 00:08:39,170
That was me saying come down to the cork
and whistle.
161
00:08:39,890 --> 00:08:41,750
Oh, you may have misunderstood that
message.
162
00:08:50,320 --> 00:08:53,740
I knew it was you, but I didn't know you
were holding my friends hostage.
163
00:08:54,380 --> 00:08:56,360
Oh, Drew, you didn't hold a sausage.
164
00:08:57,240 --> 00:09:00,960
We had a great time at the pub,
picking up fries, your chips.
165
00:09:01,500 --> 00:09:04,600
They call the loo the bathroom,
and your case is not a cheap tramp.
166
00:09:04,780 --> 00:09:05,780
She's a trawler.
167
00:09:07,800 --> 00:09:08,800
It's true.
168
00:09:09,020 --> 00:09:11,140
It makes me sound like I went into college
for it.
169
00:09:12,680 --> 00:09:15,600
You know, I expect this from them,
but you should know better.
170
00:09:16,620 --> 00:09:17,080
Uh-oh.
171
00:09:17,380 --> 00:09:17,940
Dad's mad.
172
00:09:17,980 --> 00:09:18,660
Dad's mad.
173
00:09:18,760 --> 00:09:21,660
We better go into the drawing room and
watch the telly telly.
174
00:09:23,240 --> 00:09:24,540
You're not famous, you know.
175
00:09:25,400 --> 00:09:27,280
You'd better not be watching darts in
there.
176
00:09:29,720 --> 00:09:31,520
Sorry, Drew, I didn't mean to upset you.
177
00:09:32,260 --> 00:09:33,260
But you did.
178
00:09:33,620 --> 00:09:36,502
I mean, you
spend too much time over here, you
179
00:09:36,503 --> 00:09:39,501
rearrange my
house, and now you're stealing my friends.
180
00:09:40,440 --> 00:09:43,060
Look, I'm really sorry, but it's over.
181
00:09:43,980 --> 00:09:46,820
All right, I just want you out of my house
and out of my life right now.
182
00:09:47,040 --> 00:09:48,500
What, what if immigration come by?
183
00:09:48,600 --> 00:09:50,340
The role of California building a fence.
184
00:09:50,560 --> 00:09:51,560
Out!
185
00:09:53,120 --> 00:09:53,520
Fine!
186
00:09:53,940 --> 00:09:55,220
You don't have to tell me twice!
187
00:09:58,780 --> 00:09:59,780
Well,
188
00:10:03,180 --> 00:10:04,540
I feel better already.
189
00:10:04,541 --> 00:10:06,940
Hey, guys, I'm sorry I'm mad at you.
190
00:10:07,600 --> 00:10:10,160
Hey, who's up for some good ol' Heineken,
huh?
191
00:10:10,600 --> 00:10:13,040
Imported to America for Americans.
192
00:10:15,480 --> 00:10:16,480
Mr. Wick?
193
00:10:16,880 --> 00:10:18,240
Oh, you're not still mad, are you?
194
00:10:24,060 --> 00:10:26,021
Measuring... measuring... Out!
195
00:10:36,200 --> 00:10:37,700
Hey, how come it's so cold in here?
196
00:10:38,160 --> 00:10:39,360
Can't talk.
197
00:10:41,240 --> 00:10:45,961
Must... keep... working... Man, I remember
everybody was talking to Captain Kirk.
198
00:10:47,200 --> 00:10:48,340
Work is good.
199
00:10:49,020 --> 00:10:50,640
Work is good.
200
00:10:51,720 --> 00:10:53,760
There is no I in company.
201
00:10:54,220 --> 00:10:57,060
There is no I in company.
202
00:10:57,740 --> 00:10:59,180
The hell is going on?
203
00:11:00,280 --> 00:11:02,596
Hey, Marge, you're supposed to be on your
three-week honeymoon, right?
204
00:11:02,620 --> 00:11:03,760
I got called back.
205
00:11:04,200 --> 00:11:05,200
I'm still a virgin.
206
00:11:05,460 --> 00:11:06,880
I'm a 46-year-old virgin.
207
00:11:12,840 --> 00:11:15,000
I'm gonna stay a virgin with an attitude
like that.
208
00:11:27,260 --> 00:11:27,660
Ha!
209
00:11:28,120 --> 00:11:29,120
Gotcha.
210
00:11:32,200 --> 00:11:34,060
How do you like the cameras, pig?
211
00:11:34,900 --> 00:11:38,780
Mr. Wick kind of put on all our desks so
he can keep an eye on our every move.
212
00:11:39,580 --> 00:11:42,460
Of course he didn't put one on my desk,
because my work's always perfect.
213
00:11:43,100 --> 00:11:44,100
Yeah, that's why.
214
00:11:48,140 --> 00:11:50,740
So, uh, Mr. Wick's responsible for all
this?
215
00:11:51,200 --> 00:11:52,300
Yeah, every bit of it.
216
00:11:53,160 --> 00:11:54,320
They say why he was doing it?
217
00:11:54,740 --> 00:11:55,740
Well, I'm guessing.
218
00:11:55,980 --> 00:11:57,340
It's got something to do with you.
219
00:11:58,900 --> 00:11:59,520
That's crazy.
220
00:11:59,860 --> 00:12:01,356
He wouldn't get this mad about me throwing
him out.
221
00:12:01,380 --> 00:12:03,800
He'd have to be the most petty,
vindictive, childish...
222
00:12:04,320 --> 00:12:04,920
Check, check, check.
223
00:12:05,100 --> 00:12:06,300
Yeah, I guess that's my fault.
224
00:12:08,080 --> 00:12:10,160
Is it me, or is it hot in here?
225
00:12:12,100 --> 00:12:13,120
I knew it.
226
00:12:13,380 --> 00:12:15,380
Someone cranked up the thermostat to 40.
227
00:12:16,920 --> 00:12:18,389
Mr. Wick, you know,
you shouldn't take on all
228
00:12:18,390 --> 00:12:20,060
the employees just
because you're mad at me.
229
00:12:20,720 --> 00:12:22,700
This isn't about you.
230
00:12:23,620 --> 00:12:26,460
Tortured employees is like sending
flowers.
231
00:12:26,660 --> 00:12:28,620
It's best when there's just no occasion at
all.
232
00:12:30,360 --> 00:12:31,360
What are you doing this?
233
00:12:31,440 --> 00:12:32,960
You are supposed to be a professional.
234
00:12:33,180 --> 00:12:34,180
You made me do it.
235
00:12:34,760 --> 00:12:38,360
Oh, so this is about me throwing you out
of the house.
236
00:12:38,720 --> 00:12:39,960
Yes, I hate you.
237
00:12:40,120 --> 00:12:41,120
I hate you.
238
00:12:41,640 --> 00:12:43,921
I stood over your bed with a knife for an
hour last night.
239
00:12:45,380 --> 00:12:46,660
You want to do it again tonight?
240
00:12:46,740 --> 00:12:47,740
No.
241
00:12:49,680 --> 00:12:53,800
You let me come over, or we're all going
to sleep, and we're never waking up.
242
00:12:55,640 --> 00:12:57,236
Well, see, now you're just not making any
sense.
243
00:12:57,260 --> 00:12:59,900
I mean, how come one dead guy hang out at
another dead guy's house?
244
00:12:59,940 --> 00:13:01,820
Well, let me come over, and I'll explain
it to you.
245
00:13:01,840 --> 00:13:02,840
No!
246
00:13:03,720 --> 00:13:05,680
I want you and your stuff out of my house
tonight.
247
00:13:05,900 --> 00:13:06,900
What about the INS?
248
00:13:07,340 --> 00:13:08,460
They already had one visit from them.
249
00:13:08,461 --> 00:13:10,101
If they come again, I'll take my chances.
250
00:13:10,440 --> 00:13:10,800
Fine.
251
00:13:11,220 --> 00:13:12,300
I know when I'm not wanted.
252
00:13:12,840 --> 00:13:15,220
You tell your friend Lewis to stop calling
me.
253
00:13:16,000 --> 00:13:18,780
I don't want to sneak into the dump and
look for stuff.
254
00:13:26,940 --> 00:13:29,360
That's how to be in the boxes for all your
British crap.
255
00:13:30,840 --> 00:13:33,720
In fact, why don't you take everything
that's British, even if it's mine?
256
00:13:33,800 --> 00:13:35,280
I don't even want my English muffins.
257
00:13:36,780 --> 00:13:37,180
Fine.
258
00:13:37,300 --> 00:13:38,000
Have it your way.
259
00:13:38,180 --> 00:13:39,860
You'll miss the Sir Benny Hill collection.
260
00:13:41,220 --> 00:13:42,000
He's not a sir.
261
00:13:42,120 --> 00:13:42,860
He was never knighted.
262
00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:43,620
Well, he should have been.
263
00:13:43,680 --> 00:13:44,680
He was robbed.
264
00:13:46,580 --> 00:13:47,580
The hell?
265
00:13:49,620 --> 00:13:50,736
What are you guys doing here?
266
00:13:50,760 --> 00:13:51,760
What the hell's going on?
267
00:13:53,580 --> 00:13:55,940
Never watched the Cartoon Network drunk.
268
00:13:59,120 --> 00:14:02,400
Hey, do you want to buy 400 Hong Kong
phooey t-shirts?
269
00:14:04,160 --> 00:14:05,700
You guys can't beat her right now.
270
00:14:05,780 --> 00:14:06,780
I'm ringing a bad mood.
271
00:14:07,120 --> 00:14:08,120
Mr. Wick's moving out.
272
00:14:08,440 --> 00:14:09,440
That tickles.
273
00:14:10,740 --> 00:14:12,280
See, you can always use bubbles.
274
00:14:12,600 --> 00:14:13,780
Yeah, everyone loves a bubble.
275
00:14:13,781 --> 00:14:16,661
I mean, you know, except those kids that
got to live in them or they die.
276
00:14:17,360 --> 00:14:18,360
Yeah?
277
00:14:20,440 --> 00:14:20,880
You like bubbles?
278
00:14:21,020 --> 00:14:22,500
You're gonna make me happier in beer.
279
00:14:24,400 --> 00:14:25,680
What the... Hey!
280
00:14:26,400 --> 00:14:27,460
We're out of cold beer.
281
00:14:27,800 --> 00:14:28,800
Oh, we better mute you.
282
00:14:33,090 --> 00:14:36,910
We thought that you had... I mean,
we only came over because you understand.
283
00:14:42,110 --> 00:14:43,110
He's still here.
284
00:14:43,750 --> 00:14:44,483
You people have been
kicked out of so many
285
00:14:44,484 --> 00:14:46,851
countries,
you'd think it'd be better at packing.
286
00:14:52,010 --> 00:14:53,810
Well, it helps when we're at gunpoint.
287
00:14:54,870 --> 00:14:56,070
That can be arranged.
288
00:15:02,180 --> 00:15:03,180
May I help you?
289
00:15:03,460 --> 00:15:05,280
Mr. Carey or Mr. Wick.
290
00:15:07,020 --> 00:15:10,620
Oh, well, we decided not to decide that
till we had kids.
291
00:15:12,520 --> 00:15:13,240
He's Mr. Carey.
292
00:15:13,480 --> 00:15:14,000
I'm Mr. Wick.
293
00:15:14,200 --> 00:15:15,200
And you would be?
294
00:15:15,440 --> 00:15:17,060
Julie Hager, Ian asks.
295
00:15:17,980 --> 00:15:19,940
Looks like somebody's moving out.
296
00:15:20,440 --> 00:15:20,820
No, no, no.
297
00:15:20,900 --> 00:15:22,600
We're just packing our wedding gifts.
298
00:15:23,000 --> 00:15:24,000
Hard to mess.
299
00:15:24,320 --> 00:15:27,000
Oh, like this Playboy magazine?
300
00:15:29,580 --> 00:15:30,100
Easy to explain.
301
00:15:30,240 --> 00:15:32,521
See, this is what I'm gonna look like
after the operation.
302
00:15:38,480 --> 00:15:40,740
I think you'll be a very pretty Asian
woman.
303
00:15:41,040 --> 00:15:42,040
Thank you.
304
00:15:42,860 --> 00:15:45,160
Can we just sit down and get this over
with?
305
00:15:45,161 --> 00:15:46,280
Good idea.
306
00:15:46,880 --> 00:15:49,480
We can start by looking at pictures of
your wedding.
307
00:15:50,440 --> 00:15:50,600
Sure.
308
00:15:51,020 --> 00:15:55,260
You know, the other INS agent came by,
so there'd be no more problems.
309
00:15:55,600 --> 00:15:58,280
Oh, I know, but I have to verify
everything.
310
00:16:00,440 --> 00:16:03,160
Better one have to keep proving I was gay
if I was muscular and neat.
311
00:16:04,520 --> 00:16:06,180
We come in all shapes and sizes,
you know.
312
00:16:08,820 --> 00:16:11,460
Well, these look like the real thing.
313
00:16:12,060 --> 00:16:15,432
But I have to warn
you, I will be popping in for
314
00:16:15,433 --> 00:16:18,941
random checks for,
um, the rest of your lives.
315
00:16:21,180 --> 00:16:22,200
The rest of our lives?
316
00:16:22,340 --> 00:16:25,220
You know, the other INS agent said he
wouldn't be coming by after a year.
317
00:16:27,220 --> 00:16:28,560
Yeah, oh, you're right.
318
00:16:28,720 --> 00:16:29,760
It is just a year.
319
00:16:30,380 --> 00:16:31,620
No, no, no, he's not.
320
00:16:31,900 --> 00:16:33,340
I heard the rules have changed.
321
00:16:34,800 --> 00:16:36,240
Yeah, I'm sorry.
322
00:16:36,540 --> 00:16:37,020
You're right.
323
00:16:37,520 --> 00:16:38,520
The rules have changed.
324
00:16:40,620 --> 00:16:41,620
Uh-huh.
325
00:16:41,940 --> 00:16:44,820
Hey, listen, you know, I always wondered,
what does INS stand for anyway?
326
00:16:49,220 --> 00:16:50,220
Um...
327
00:16:51,460 --> 00:16:51,780
International.
328
00:16:51,781 --> 00:16:53,981
I'm afraid I'm not allowed to give out
that information.
329
00:16:55,120 --> 00:16:56,120
She's a fake!
330
00:16:56,580 --> 00:16:57,280
What's going on here, Wick?
331
00:16:57,480 --> 00:16:57,820
Oh, no.
332
00:16:58,020 --> 00:16:59,740
I'm not gonna get in trouble, am I?
333
00:16:59,860 --> 00:17:01,622
I mean, you know, if her impersonating
a government
334
00:17:01,623 --> 00:17:04,480
official, I don't
want to lose my cosmetology license.
335
00:17:07,100 --> 00:17:11,520
If you didn't lose it for the worst bikini
wax I've ever had, I think you're safe!
336
00:17:14,160 --> 00:17:15,560
All right, the show's over.
337
00:17:15,820 --> 00:17:18,920
Out, out, out, out, out, out, out,
out, out, out, out, out, out, out.
338
00:17:20,940 --> 00:17:22,620
Are you gonna report me?
339
00:17:23,360 --> 00:17:25,920
I think having a waxes area is punishment
enough.
340
00:17:31,920 --> 00:17:33,340
What are you trying to pull?
341
00:17:33,480 --> 00:17:33,800
What's going on?
342
00:17:33,801 --> 00:17:36,321
Why are you trying to scare me like that
with a phony INS agent?
343
00:17:36,640 --> 00:17:38,300
I... I just didn't want to leave.
344
00:17:39,140 --> 00:17:39,280
Why?
345
00:17:39,600 --> 00:17:39,820
Why?
346
00:17:40,000 --> 00:17:42,000
What can you possibly want from me?
347
00:17:44,000 --> 00:17:47,040
Well... I've grown kind of accustomed
to your ways.
348
00:17:49,400 --> 00:17:52,100
I enjoy the smell of your French toast in
the morning.
349
00:17:53,120 --> 00:17:54,120
And in the evening.
350
00:17:55,500 --> 00:17:56,500
And at 2 a.m.
351
00:17:59,520 --> 00:18:00,660
You're like Denny's.
352
00:18:00,760 --> 00:18:01,940
You serve breakfast any time.
353
00:18:06,190 --> 00:18:07,870
Mr. Rick, are you falling in love with me?
354
00:18:11,330 --> 00:18:12,330
No.
355
00:18:12,430 --> 00:18:12,650
No.
356
00:18:13,410 --> 00:18:15,330
No, I'm just lonely, that's all.
357
00:18:15,670 --> 00:18:16,470
You don't understand.
358
00:18:16,610 --> 00:18:18,230
I've lived alone my whole life.
359
00:18:18,690 --> 00:18:21,007
Even when Mummy sent me off to boarding
school, all the
360
00:18:21,008 --> 00:18:24,410
other boys got together and
got me an apartment off campus.
361
00:18:26,430 --> 00:18:27,430
I'm sorry.
362
00:18:27,650 --> 00:18:28,650
Kids can be cruel, huh?
363
00:18:29,350 --> 00:18:29,630
Adults too.
364
00:18:29,830 --> 00:18:30,830
Now get out.
365
00:18:31,950 --> 00:18:32,350
Why?
366
00:18:32,530 --> 00:18:33,850
Why can't I be your friend?
367
00:18:33,851 --> 00:18:34,390
Huh?
368
00:18:34,630 --> 00:18:40,590
Is it because I'm overbearing, obnoxious,
lying, cheating, scoundrel, jackass?
369
00:18:41,090 --> 00:18:42,090
Or...
370
00:18:42,370 --> 00:18:44,750
Or is it because I'm your boss?
371
00:18:45,790 --> 00:18:47,150
You really want me to answer that?
372
00:18:48,410 --> 00:18:49,410
No.
373
00:18:51,470 --> 00:18:54,290
Look, it's not you, it's me.
374
00:18:54,470 --> 00:18:57,190
I mean, I'm just holding it back.
375
00:18:57,370 --> 00:18:58,650
He could be better than this.
376
00:18:58,970 --> 00:19:01,150
Besides, I'm really not in a good place
right now.
377
00:19:03,230 --> 00:19:06,430
Boy, you know, I never gave this speech
before, but I sure do know all the words.
378
00:19:08,730 --> 00:19:09,730
Well, fine.
379
00:19:09,850 --> 00:19:11,330
I would have tired of you eventually.
380
00:19:12,190 --> 00:19:14,330
You could never satisfy me
conversationally.
381
00:19:15,810 --> 00:19:16,810
Oh, really?
382
00:19:17,950 --> 00:19:21,810
You know, all the times I laughed at your
anecdotes, I was faking it.
383
00:19:23,630 --> 00:19:25,410
I don't even know who you are anymore!
384
00:19:26,890 --> 00:19:29,510
You're not the man I forced to marry me to
defraud the INS!
385
00:19:30,850 --> 00:19:31,250
Fine!
386
00:19:31,750 --> 00:19:33,110
I'll never darken your door again!
387
00:19:33,510 --> 00:19:34,590
Send my belongings!
388
00:19:34,970 --> 00:19:35,150
Fine!
389
00:19:35,310 --> 00:19:35,550
I will!
390
00:19:35,850 --> 00:19:35,930
Fine!
391
00:19:36,730 --> 00:19:36,730
Fine!
392
00:19:36,890 --> 00:19:37,890
Fine!
393
00:19:46,860 --> 00:19:47,740
Could you move your car?
394
00:19:47,860 --> 00:19:48,860
You're blocking me in.
395
00:19:55,420 --> 00:19:58,780
You know, I'm kind of sorry that Drew got
rid of Mr. Wick.
396
00:19:58,880 --> 00:19:59,980
I enjoyed learning English.
397
00:20:02,820 --> 00:20:06,200
Yeah, once you've been a trollop,
it's hard to go back to being a slut.
398
00:20:07,780 --> 00:20:09,500
I'm sure you'll give it the old college
try.
399
00:20:11,380 --> 00:20:12,980
I'm gonna miss him picking up the check.
400
00:20:13,840 --> 00:20:14,520
You know, it's funny.
401
00:20:14,740 --> 00:20:16,299
I always thought it
would be Kate who'd marry
402
00:20:16,300 --> 00:20:18,601
some rich sugar daddy
we'd all sponge off of.
403
00:20:19,640 --> 00:20:21,340
How could I sponge off myself?
404
00:20:22,000 --> 00:20:23,000
Right, angel drawers?
405
00:20:24,860 --> 00:20:25,860
All right.
406
00:20:26,060 --> 00:20:27,520
You're always hitting on me.
407
00:20:28,260 --> 00:20:28,600
Fine.
408
00:20:28,980 --> 00:20:31,680
Say something incredibly charming and
romantic.
409
00:20:32,040 --> 00:20:33,040
Win me over.
410
00:20:34,560 --> 00:20:35,080
Forget it.
411
00:20:35,081 --> 00:20:36,801
If I got a top angel drawers, you die
alone.
412
00:20:43,840 --> 00:20:44,840
Hello?
413
00:20:45,440 --> 00:20:46,480
Yes, this is Kate O'Brien.
414
00:20:48,380 --> 00:20:49,380
Oh, my God.
415
00:20:50,980 --> 00:20:51,760
Drew's been in an accident.
416
00:20:51,980 --> 00:20:53,180
They took him to the hospital.
417
00:20:54,200 --> 00:20:55,200
God.
28762
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish (Latin American)
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof