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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:12,233 --> 00:00:14,290 Of course the Warren commission 2 00:00:14,324 --> 00:00:16,947 was Bull, but that doesn't change 3 00:00:16,979 --> 00:00:18,473 the bottom line. 4 00:00:18,507 --> 00:00:19,968 Oswald did it! 5 00:00:20,002 --> 00:00:22,691 He was a Patsy for the military. 6 00:00:22,724 --> 00:00:26,376 Who is this guy, Oliver stone's retard brother? 7 00:00:26,409 --> 00:00:29,098 Read my lips! 8 00:00:29,130 --> 00:00:31,090 There was no conspiracy. 9 00:00:31,122 --> 00:00:32,983 No friggin' way a bunch 10 00:00:33,015 --> 00:00:34,875 of jar-Headed foul-Ups 11 00:00:34,907 --> 00:00:37,432 who pay 800 bucks for a toilet seat 12 00:00:37,465 --> 00:00:39,059 could pull that off. 13 00:00:39,091 --> 00:00:41,182 You're outta here. 14 00:00:41,216 --> 00:00:43,042 Trudy, isn't there anyone 15 00:00:43,074 --> 00:00:45,963 that has something intelligent to say tonight? 16 00:00:45,998 --> 00:00:48,353 Your pal Rudy's on line two. 17 00:00:48,387 --> 00:00:50,213 I guess the answer's no. 18 00:00:50,246 --> 00:00:51,707 Hey, loser. 19 00:00:51,739 --> 00:00:54,429 How's life on the other side of the galaxy? 20 00:00:54,463 --> 00:00:56,489 I told you not to call me that. 21 00:00:56,521 --> 00:00:58,015 Mr. Sensitive. 22 00:00:58,049 --> 00:01:00,305 You still live in your parents' basement? 23 00:01:00,339 --> 00:01:02,464 You only go out when your extraterrestrial buddies 24 00:01:02,496 --> 00:01:03,990 take you for a joyride. 25 00:01:04,025 --> 00:01:05,718 Let me check the dictionary. 26 00:01:05,751 --> 00:01:07,177 Yep, there's your picture. 27 00:01:07,212 --> 00:01:09,204 Right there under "Loser." 28 00:01:11,062 --> 00:01:12,789 Well, I'd love to chat, 29 00:01:12,823 --> 00:01:15,479 but I've got another mental defective on line three. 30 00:01:15,512 --> 00:01:18,134 Eldon, is it True? 31 00:01:18,168 --> 00:01:22,218 You have actual proof that we're surrounded by aliens? 32 00:01:22,252 --> 00:01:24,210 Just because you've never seen a thing 33 00:01:24,244 --> 00:01:26,003 doesn't mean it isn't real. 34 00:01:26,037 --> 00:01:27,863 I'm shaking, Eldon. 35 00:01:27,895 --> 00:01:30,185 Come on, lay your proof on me. 36 00:01:30,220 --> 00:01:31,747 I can take it. 37 00:01:31,779 --> 00:01:34,835 They're inside people. 38 00:01:34,867 --> 00:01:36,826 Lots of people. 39 00:01:36,858 --> 00:01:39,448 Except most of them don't know it. 40 00:01:39,483 --> 00:01:41,707 But somehow you do. 41 00:01:41,740 --> 00:01:43,798 Let me ask you something... 42 00:01:43,830 --> 00:01:46,787 Why is it these space invaders, 43 00:01:46,819 --> 00:01:50,604 they never visit presidents of universities 44 00:01:50,638 --> 00:01:52,762 or brain surgeons? 45 00:01:52,795 --> 00:01:57,444 How come they always show up at some trailer park 46 00:01:57,476 --> 00:01:59,170 to a mook with bad teeth 47 00:01:59,204 --> 00:02:01,527 Who's got a love thang For his sister? 48 00:02:01,559 --> 00:02:04,681 I didn't ask to be infested by an alien. 49 00:02:04,714 --> 00:02:06,209 Sure, you did. 50 00:02:06,241 --> 00:02:08,699 You stopped taking your medication. 51 00:02:08,731 --> 00:02:10,192 Do me a favor. 52 00:02:10,225 --> 00:02:12,683 Pull over, let me talk to e.T. 53 00:02:12,715 --> 00:02:14,707 I'll straighten you both out. 54 00:02:14,741 --> 00:02:16,600 I can feel him under my skin. 55 00:02:16,634 --> 00:02:18,658 He's trying to get out. 56 00:02:18,691 --> 00:02:21,149 You want to know the truth, Eldon? 57 00:02:21,181 --> 00:02:23,141 There are no aliens, 58 00:02:23,173 --> 00:02:26,129 not in our little corner of hell. 59 00:02:26,161 --> 00:02:28,153 And if there were, 60 00:02:28,187 --> 00:02:32,105 the last person they'd want to hang out with is you... 61 00:02:32,137 --> 00:02:35,623 A floater in the shallow end of the Gene pool. 62 00:02:35,658 --> 00:02:38,081 I can't stand it anymore. 63 00:02:38,113 --> 00:02:39,607 Me either! 64 00:02:39,641 --> 00:02:41,069 Do yourself a favor... 65 00:02:41,101 --> 00:02:43,559 Put yourself out of your misery. 66 00:02:43,591 --> 00:02:45,518 Your friends will thank me. 67 00:02:51,925 --> 00:02:55,278 Well, people, I've got to hand it to you. 68 00:02:55,311 --> 00:02:58,200 You've taken an otherwise depressing evening 69 00:02:58,233 --> 00:03:01,487 and made it truly dismal. 70 00:03:01,519 --> 00:03:03,479 So until tomorrow, 71 00:03:03,511 --> 00:03:07,728 unless I get really lucky and die, 72 00:03:07,762 --> 00:03:09,985 this is Stan harbinger... 73 00:03:10,019 --> 00:03:11,945 the harbinger of truth, 74 00:03:11,977 --> 00:03:14,933 truth, truth, truth, truth... 75 00:03:14,965 --> 00:03:17,423 we got to talk about tomorrow. 76 00:03:17,456 --> 00:03:18,917 Huh? 77 00:03:18,949 --> 00:03:20,411 The syndication meeting? 78 00:03:20,443 --> 00:03:21,905 We need another station. 79 00:03:21,937 --> 00:03:24,395 Tulsa bailed, and we need at least 35 markets. 80 00:03:24,428 --> 00:03:26,752 Trudy, you're the producer... Produce. 81 00:03:35,749 --> 00:03:37,176 Can I help you? 82 00:03:37,210 --> 00:03:38,704 I'm Eldon. 83 00:03:38,737 --> 00:03:40,298 We've been waiting for you. 84 00:03:45,642 --> 00:03:47,071 Hey, take it easy. 85 00:03:47,104 --> 00:03:49,760 If you can see the light, you can see the truth. 86 00:03:49,793 --> 00:03:52,813 What, are you out of your mind? 87 00:04:02,243 --> 00:04:04,335 Oh, my god. 88 00:04:09,082 --> 00:04:10,642 What the... 89 00:04:34,812 --> 00:04:37,867 There is nothing wrong with your television. 90 00:04:37,900 --> 00:04:40,589 Do not attempt to adjust the picture. 91 00:04:40,622 --> 00:04:43,477 We are now controlling the transmission. 92 00:04:43,510 --> 00:04:45,735 We control the horizontal, 93 00:04:45,769 --> 00:04:47,693 and the vertical. 94 00:04:47,728 --> 00:04:50,482 We can deluge you with a thousand channels 95 00:04:50,516 --> 00:04:55,298 or expand one single image to crystal clarity... 96 00:04:55,330 --> 00:04:57,322 and beyond. 97 00:04:57,354 --> 00:04:59,480 We can shape your vision 98 00:04:59,513 --> 00:05:02,767 to anything our imagination can conceive. 99 00:05:04,924 --> 00:05:06,717 For the next hour, 100 00:05:06,751 --> 00:05:10,868 we will control all that you see and hear. 101 00:05:17,010 --> 00:05:21,691 You are about to experience the awe and mystery 102 00:05:21,724 --> 00:05:24,645 which reaches from the deepest inner mind 103 00:05:24,680 --> 00:05:27,501 to the outer limits. 104 00:05:34,424 --> 00:05:37,811 The skeptic's world is a secure one 105 00:05:37,843 --> 00:05:40,831 built on unshakable truths. 106 00:05:40,864 --> 00:05:43,321 But what happens when its foundation 107 00:05:43,354 --> 00:05:45,346 begins to crumble? 108 00:05:45,381 --> 00:05:48,235 I told you, the guy was already waiting for me. 109 00:05:48,269 --> 00:05:50,293 He was covered in gasoline. 110 00:05:50,326 --> 00:05:53,879 He said a bunch of stuff that didn't make any sense. 111 00:05:53,912 --> 00:05:56,203 You didn't try to stop him? 112 00:05:56,237 --> 00:05:58,528 Try to stop him? There wasn't any time. 113 00:05:58,560 --> 00:05:59,854 Then what happened? 114 00:05:59,887 --> 00:06:02,179 Then I got out the marshmallows. 115 00:06:04,703 --> 00:06:06,728 The guy burned to death. 116 00:06:06,760 --> 00:06:08,986 End of story. 117 00:06:09,018 --> 00:06:11,209 Thanks very much, Mr. Harbinger. 118 00:06:11,242 --> 00:06:13,035 We'll get back to you. 119 00:06:13,070 --> 00:06:14,695 Thanks. 120 00:06:16,721 --> 00:06:20,141 When I think about What happened to that poor guy... 121 00:06:20,173 --> 00:06:21,667 poor guy? 122 00:06:21,700 --> 00:06:24,158 Trudy, the guy tried to set me on fire. 123 00:06:24,190 --> 00:06:26,316 He would have too, if he hadn't... 124 00:06:26,348 --> 00:06:29,138 hadn't? 125 00:06:29,171 --> 00:06:30,665 Look. 126 00:06:30,699 --> 00:06:35,113 Given the right time, place, circumstances 127 00:06:35,146 --> 00:06:39,430 anyone is capable of imagining anything. 128 00:06:39,464 --> 00:06:41,985 What the hell is that supposed to mean? 129 00:06:42,019 --> 00:06:44,576 It means... 130 00:06:44,609 --> 00:06:47,132 the guy was a deranged nutjob. 131 00:06:47,165 --> 00:06:49,987 He got what he deserved. 132 00:07:00,743 --> 00:07:02,503 There he is! 133 00:07:02,536 --> 00:07:04,495 Stan, how do you feel 134 00:07:04,528 --> 00:07:06,487 about that guy killing himself 135 00:07:06,520 --> 00:07:07,981 because of you? 136 00:07:08,014 --> 00:07:09,807 Has geraman broadcasting 137 00:07:09,841 --> 00:07:12,930 changed its mind about syndicating you? 138 00:07:12,961 --> 00:07:15,485 Don't those people have a war to cover? 139 00:07:15,519 --> 00:07:16,978 The press are morons. 140 00:07:17,013 --> 00:07:19,436 What are we going to say to Phil? 141 00:07:19,469 --> 00:07:21,925 Don't worry about Phil. 142 00:07:21,958 --> 00:07:23,917 Phil, how are you? 143 00:07:23,950 --> 00:07:25,909 Stan, you didn't say anything 144 00:07:25,943 --> 00:07:27,935 to those ratbags, did you? 145 00:07:27,969 --> 00:07:30,391 I'm saving it for the show. 146 00:07:30,424 --> 00:07:32,451 Well, we should talk about that. 147 00:07:32,483 --> 00:07:34,409 Phil, don't make me angry. 148 00:07:34,443 --> 00:07:37,363 My listeners will expect me to talk about this. 149 00:07:37,396 --> 00:07:40,385 I want you to talk about it, but we've got to be careful. 150 00:07:40,419 --> 00:07:41,879 The dead guy. Eldon Devries. 151 00:07:41,913 --> 00:07:44,303 His wife wants to Sue everybody. Let her. 152 00:07:44,335 --> 00:07:45,698 It's totally meritless. 153 00:07:45,730 --> 00:07:48,652 Do you honestly believe that it was my fault? 154 00:07:48,686 --> 00:07:50,180 In a literal sense? 155 00:07:50,212 --> 00:07:52,204 In any sense. 156 00:07:52,237 --> 00:07:54,761 Geraman broadcasting has spent a great deal of money 157 00:07:54,793 --> 00:07:56,719 trying to syndicate your program. 158 00:07:56,753 --> 00:07:59,144 We've already lost one potential affiliate 159 00:07:59,176 --> 00:08:01,600 due to local advertiser resistance. 160 00:08:01,634 --> 00:08:02,795 In tulsa! 161 00:08:02,829 --> 00:08:04,854 We've got three more stations interested. 162 00:08:04,887 --> 00:08:07,077 Amarillo, poughkeepsie, baton rouge. 163 00:08:07,111 --> 00:08:09,435 You hear that? Poughkeepsie. 164 00:08:09,468 --> 00:08:11,361 Are you aware of a group called the believers? 165 00:08:11,395 --> 00:08:13,686 Are you aware of a thing called a nose hair trimmer? 166 00:08:13,718 --> 00:08:15,611 They're one of those idiotic ufo Groups 167 00:08:15,644 --> 00:08:18,930 that think the Sky is falling and the government is in on it. 168 00:08:18,965 --> 00:08:21,420 Everywhere they look, they see aliens. 169 00:08:21,454 --> 00:08:22,914 They're cranks. 170 00:08:22,948 --> 00:08:25,305 Lower on the food chain than trekkies. 171 00:08:25,339 --> 00:08:27,363 You have antagonized them in the past. 172 00:08:27,396 --> 00:08:29,621 Because they live in a dreamworld. 173 00:08:29,653 --> 00:08:31,745 They're not reasonable people. 174 00:08:31,778 --> 00:08:34,136 They're saying that you haven't been 175 00:08:34,169 --> 00:08:36,128 entirely truthful about what happened. 176 00:08:36,161 --> 00:08:39,016 Have you been truthful with us, with the police? 177 00:08:39,049 --> 00:08:41,008 No, I set the guy on fire. 178 00:08:41,041 --> 00:08:43,597 How could you take these people seriously? 179 00:08:43,631 --> 00:08:46,586 They have a good-Sized membership which they say 180 00:08:46,619 --> 00:08:49,641 they'll use to protest in every city that you go into. 181 00:08:49,673 --> 00:08:51,334 Perfect... Instant publicity. 182 00:08:51,367 --> 00:08:53,060 Instant bad publicity. 183 00:08:53,093 --> 00:08:54,487 Phil... 184 00:08:54,522 --> 00:08:56,514 it's a controversial show. 185 00:08:56,546 --> 00:08:59,367 What better than to go wide during a controversy? 186 00:08:59,402 --> 00:09:01,426 Stan, this is more than a controversy. 187 00:09:01,459 --> 00:09:03,451 A man is dead here. 188 00:09:03,486 --> 00:09:05,012 And these believers say 189 00:09:05,045 --> 00:09:07,999 that you might have something to do with it. 190 00:09:08,033 --> 00:09:09,494 Big picture... 191 00:09:09,528 --> 00:09:11,718 We want advertisers with peace of mind 192 00:09:11,752 --> 00:09:13,545 and a willingness to spend money. 193 00:09:13,577 --> 00:09:15,039 The little picture... 194 00:09:15,071 --> 00:09:18,458 Angry nutjobs get stroked, they go back into their holes. 195 00:09:18,491 --> 00:09:20,052 Where's the difficulty? 196 00:09:23,472 --> 00:09:26,494 So you want me to stroke them a little. 197 00:09:26,526 --> 00:09:28,916 Exactly. 198 00:09:28,949 --> 00:09:32,601 And please, apologize to the guy's family. 199 00:09:32,634 --> 00:09:37,216 No mea culpas, Just you deeply regret that it happened. 200 00:09:37,251 --> 00:09:41,134 Deeply and sincerely. 201 00:09:46,812 --> 00:09:49,334 So I guess what I'm saying, people, 202 00:09:49,368 --> 00:09:54,813 is that it's tragic, the loss of life. 203 00:09:54,846 --> 00:09:56,804 It's always unfortunate. 204 00:09:56,837 --> 00:10:00,788 And this guy, Eldon, 205 00:10:00,821 --> 00:10:04,242 though he was obviously disturbed, 206 00:10:04,274 --> 00:10:07,828 I do feel... what I mean is 207 00:10:07,860 --> 00:10:10,617 the fact that he died... 208 00:10:19,712 --> 00:10:21,339 I'm sorry, 209 00:10:21,373 --> 00:10:23,198 but it's not my fault. 210 00:10:23,231 --> 00:10:25,223 The man was delusional, 211 00:10:25,258 --> 00:10:29,174 and so are all of his whackjob, stargazing friends. 212 00:10:29,208 --> 00:10:31,664 Klaatu barada nikto. 213 00:10:31,697 --> 00:10:34,287 Loosely translated, 214 00:10:34,321 --> 00:10:36,645 "get lives, people." 215 00:10:36,678 --> 00:10:39,533 No apology will be forthcoming. 216 00:10:39,566 --> 00:10:42,090 If that means kissing my job Goodbye, 217 00:10:42,122 --> 00:10:43,585 then so be it. 218 00:10:43,617 --> 00:10:45,907 I'd rather flip burgers 219 00:10:45,940 --> 00:10:47,932 than sit here telling people 220 00:10:47,967 --> 00:10:50,357 a bunch of stuff I don't believe in. 221 00:10:50,389 --> 00:10:53,078 You want sweet talk that makes you feel Better? 222 00:10:53,111 --> 00:10:54,572 Then go to your mamas. 223 00:10:54,605 --> 00:10:58,590 You want the truth, then you've come to the right place. 224 00:10:58,624 --> 00:11:00,947 Tell me that's what we're doing here, 225 00:11:00,980 --> 00:11:04,234 people, because I'm starting to lose faith. 226 00:11:04,267 --> 00:11:05,761 Marco, speak to me. 227 00:11:05,795 --> 00:11:07,521 My station manager right? 228 00:11:07,554 --> 00:11:10,376 F him, dude. He's a total jerk. 229 00:11:10,409 --> 00:11:13,098 Sheila, you agree? 230 00:11:13,132 --> 00:11:15,521 You're the harbinger of truth, Stan. 231 00:11:15,556 --> 00:11:17,480 They should apologize to you. 232 00:11:17,514 --> 00:11:20,368 You think you headed us off at the pass? 233 00:11:20,402 --> 00:11:22,859 No, I don't think anything. 234 00:11:22,892 --> 00:11:26,544 But I know what I know. 235 00:11:32,155 --> 00:11:35,409 Eddie, you read my mind. 236 00:11:35,442 --> 00:11:38,430 It's from the lady at the bar. 237 00:11:43,410 --> 00:11:45,867 You going to make me drink this alone? 238 00:11:45,900 --> 00:11:48,489 I wouldn't dream of invading your privacy. 239 00:11:48,523 --> 00:11:50,980 You can invade. I won't complain. 240 00:11:51,014 --> 00:11:53,635 Enjoy the drink. 241 00:12:07,149 --> 00:12:09,639 I insist you invade my privacy. 242 00:12:09,671 --> 00:12:11,264 My name's Stan. 243 00:12:11,298 --> 00:12:13,257 I know who you are. 244 00:12:13,290 --> 00:12:15,282 Caught your show tonight. 245 00:12:15,316 --> 00:12:18,236 You left quite a few bodies in your wake. 246 00:12:18,270 --> 00:12:19,730 Yeah, well, 247 00:12:19,764 --> 00:12:22,221 just giving them what they pay me for. 248 00:12:22,254 --> 00:12:24,213 I didn't catch your name. 249 00:12:24,246 --> 00:12:25,774 Darcy. 250 00:12:25,806 --> 00:12:27,300 Mind if I sit down, 251 00:12:27,334 --> 00:12:29,226 Darcy? 252 00:12:29,260 --> 00:12:31,949 You a regular listener? 253 00:12:31,981 --> 00:12:33,475 Occasional. 254 00:12:33,508 --> 00:12:36,597 It's not often I'm by a radio that time of night. 255 00:12:36,631 --> 00:12:38,821 Well, what are you usually doing? 256 00:12:38,854 --> 00:12:41,212 Working. 257 00:12:41,244 --> 00:12:43,933 Playing... whatever. 258 00:12:43,966 --> 00:12:46,955 But not tonight. 259 00:12:46,989 --> 00:12:49,113 No. 260 00:12:49,147 --> 00:12:50,740 Tonight I got lucky. 261 00:12:54,723 --> 00:12:57,081 Let me put it this way. 262 00:12:57,114 --> 00:12:59,571 I come from the, um... 263 00:12:59,604 --> 00:13:03,189 other side of the other side of the tracks. 264 00:13:03,224 --> 00:13:05,547 You know that expression 265 00:13:05,580 --> 00:13:09,033 "The Meek shall inherit the earth." 266 00:13:09,066 --> 00:13:14,345 What it really means is they inherit the dirt. 267 00:13:14,379 --> 00:13:19,225 Life is pointless, heaven's a fantasy, 268 00:13:19,259 --> 00:13:23,376 and hell is right here on earth. 269 00:13:23,409 --> 00:13:26,730 Doesn't give a person much reason to go on living. 270 00:13:26,762 --> 00:13:29,618 Ah, but that's why you... 271 00:13:29,650 --> 00:13:33,435 you have to find the reason. 272 00:13:33,468 --> 00:13:35,759 From the moment I saw you, 273 00:13:35,794 --> 00:13:38,216 I had a definite reason. 274 00:13:38,249 --> 00:13:40,208 And what would that be? 275 00:13:40,241 --> 00:13:43,827 To see how good you'd look 276 00:13:43,861 --> 00:13:47,646 with this outfit folded over a chair. 277 00:13:47,678 --> 00:13:50,865 And that's supposed to give me a reason to go on? 278 00:13:50,898 --> 00:13:53,024 It's the reason you bought me a drink. 279 00:13:53,057 --> 00:13:55,845 Actually, no. 280 00:13:55,878 --> 00:14:00,096 I, um, I just wanted to get to know you better. 281 00:14:00,128 --> 00:14:02,188 Well, now you know me. 282 00:14:02,220 --> 00:14:05,606 Apparently you don't know me. 283 00:14:08,163 --> 00:14:11,117 I would never fold my dress over a chair. 284 00:14:11,151 --> 00:14:15,101 I'd slip it on a hanger... A wooden one. 285 00:14:15,135 --> 00:14:17,857 I could see killing a tree to make that happen. 286 00:14:20,779 --> 00:14:22,506 Pay for the drinks 287 00:14:22,538 --> 00:14:24,464 while I pop to the ladies'. 288 00:15:04,105 --> 00:15:05,665 Stan! 289 00:15:05,698 --> 00:15:07,358 Stan! 290 00:15:09,583 --> 00:15:12,306 What the hell are you doing? 291 00:15:20,097 --> 00:15:22,056 Here's some water. 292 00:15:22,089 --> 00:15:24,048 Want something stronger? 293 00:15:24,081 --> 00:15:25,542 I'll get it. 294 00:15:25,575 --> 00:15:27,036 Uh, yeah. 295 00:15:27,069 --> 00:15:28,530 Some vodka. 296 00:15:28,563 --> 00:15:30,223 It's in the freezer. 297 00:15:32,547 --> 00:15:36,033 So, not that I'm the jealous type, 298 00:15:36,066 --> 00:15:38,489 but is this a habit of yours, 299 00:15:38,523 --> 00:15:41,544 following strange women out into the street? 300 00:15:41,578 --> 00:15:44,831 Oh, yeah, a really bad one. 301 00:15:44,864 --> 00:15:47,719 Say, you didn't notice 302 00:15:47,752 --> 00:15:49,811 anything unusual about this woman? 303 00:15:51,637 --> 00:15:54,193 You mean, besides the bad Dye job, 304 00:15:54,226 --> 00:15:57,182 crummy lipstick, and those shoes? 305 00:15:57,215 --> 00:15:59,439 No, nothing. 306 00:16:02,925 --> 00:16:05,050 Are you all right? 307 00:16:05,083 --> 00:16:09,366 My doctor keeps telling me that too many antacid tablets 308 00:16:09,399 --> 00:16:11,357 are bad for me. 309 00:16:11,391 --> 00:16:14,346 I'm beginning to think he's right. 310 00:16:14,379 --> 00:16:16,338 You know how it is. 311 00:16:16,371 --> 00:16:18,329 A guy gets indigestion, 312 00:16:18,363 --> 00:16:21,849 suddenly he thinks he's got a tumor growing inside of him. 313 00:16:21,882 --> 00:16:24,306 It's conspiracy on a molecular level. 314 00:16:24,339 --> 00:16:25,966 You said it, sister. 315 00:16:25,999 --> 00:16:27,825 And it's insidious. 316 00:16:27,858 --> 00:16:31,311 And there's nothing we can do about it. 317 00:16:31,344 --> 00:16:36,258 So, this other woman. 318 00:16:36,291 --> 00:16:41,238 Clearly I'm going to have to do something 319 00:16:41,271 --> 00:16:44,260 to make you forget about her. 320 00:16:46,251 --> 00:16:48,243 What other woman? 321 00:16:49,737 --> 00:16:53,688 I think I've changed my mind about that image I had of you. 322 00:16:53,721 --> 00:16:55,115 Oh, yeah? 323 00:16:55,148 --> 00:16:56,775 You'd look even better 324 00:16:56,808 --> 00:16:59,399 with this outfit right here on the floor. 325 00:17:08,662 --> 00:17:13,475 That mouth of yours is a dangerous weapon. 326 00:17:13,509 --> 00:17:15,634 Tell me about it. 327 00:17:18,223 --> 00:17:20,879 So, would you really quit 328 00:17:20,912 --> 00:17:23,502 if they forced you to apologize? 329 00:17:25,593 --> 00:17:29,046 Where did that come from? 330 00:17:29,079 --> 00:17:32,034 I have a confession to make. 331 00:17:32,067 --> 00:17:35,819 I'm not actually an occasional listener. 332 00:17:38,044 --> 00:17:42,492 The ugly truth comes out. 333 00:17:42,525 --> 00:17:44,484 You listen all the time? 334 00:17:44,517 --> 00:17:45,978 No, no, no. 335 00:17:46,011 --> 00:17:47,970 Not when you're on vacation. 336 00:17:48,003 --> 00:17:50,295 I don't do "best of" shows. 337 00:17:50,328 --> 00:17:53,282 I prefer it live and in my face. 338 00:17:53,315 --> 00:17:56,370 I guess I sort of saw it coming. 339 00:17:56,403 --> 00:17:58,760 What can I say? 340 00:17:58,794 --> 00:18:00,919 You inspired me. 341 00:18:00,952 --> 00:18:06,396 Like the way you handled that guy who killed himself. 342 00:18:06,429 --> 00:18:07,891 My Buddy Eldon. 343 00:18:07,924 --> 00:18:09,882 Mm-hmm. 344 00:18:09,915 --> 00:18:13,103 I could have called in my support, 345 00:18:13,136 --> 00:18:17,186 but actions speak so much louder than words. 346 00:18:19,909 --> 00:18:23,462 I thought you guys were clear on the apology issue. 347 00:18:23,495 --> 00:18:25,321 It's not going to happen. 348 00:18:25,354 --> 00:18:27,312 It's going to happen, or else. 349 00:18:27,345 --> 00:18:29,802 You've made a bad situation worse. 350 00:18:29,836 --> 00:18:32,293 Our advertisers are going off their nut. 351 00:18:32,326 --> 00:18:35,314 Not to mention the effect you had on the widow. 352 00:18:35,347 --> 00:18:37,803 If Stan's not willing to help us, 353 00:18:37,836 --> 00:18:41,256 we'll have to re-Evaluate our willingness to help Stan. 354 00:18:41,289 --> 00:18:44,079 Jules Mason, our afternoon guy, could do it. 355 00:18:44,112 --> 00:18:45,573 Jules sucks. 356 00:18:45,606 --> 00:18:47,365 Ask the believers 357 00:18:47,399 --> 00:18:51,017 what they'd like Stan to say, and he could read it on the air. 358 00:18:51,051 --> 00:18:52,877 You know, that sounds tempting. 359 00:18:52,910 --> 00:18:55,632 You would let those psychos put words in his mouth? 360 00:18:55,665 --> 00:18:57,591 Would all of you please shut up? 361 00:18:57,624 --> 00:18:59,483 Trudy? 362 00:18:59,517 --> 00:19:01,276 You're brilliant. 363 00:19:01,309 --> 00:19:02,903 If they want a soapbox, 364 00:19:02,936 --> 00:19:06,057 we'd be stupid not to give it to them. 365 00:19:06,090 --> 00:19:08,016 I was being sarcastic. 366 00:19:08,049 --> 00:19:10,174 A 50,000 Watt megaphone 367 00:19:10,207 --> 00:19:12,431 So they can tell the world 368 00:19:12,464 --> 00:19:14,689 that we're surrounded by martians. 369 00:19:14,722 --> 00:19:17,179 It'll be like shooting turkeys with a bazooka. 370 00:19:17,212 --> 00:19:20,632 You want to drive another one of these schmucks to suicide? 371 00:19:20,665 --> 00:19:24,450 Whoever the guy is, I'll give him an open Mike. 372 00:19:24,483 --> 00:19:26,541 I don't think your Listeners will go for that. 373 00:19:26,574 --> 00:19:28,566 What do you want to bet 374 00:19:28,600 --> 00:19:31,024 that the believers make total fools of themselves? 375 00:19:31,057 --> 00:19:33,082 We'll ask them about Eldon, 376 00:19:33,115 --> 00:19:34,543 what they think happened. 377 00:19:34,576 --> 00:19:36,568 I'm dying to hear their explanation. 378 00:19:36,601 --> 00:19:39,390 That way the radio station's off the hook, 379 00:19:39,423 --> 00:19:41,382 our listeners get a good laugh 380 00:19:41,415 --> 00:19:45,101 and maybe finally we'll have something else to talk about. 381 00:19:47,026 --> 00:19:49,781 I hope you know what you're doing. 382 00:19:49,815 --> 00:19:52,470 What's the matter? You don't trust me anymore. 383 00:19:52,503 --> 00:19:54,961 It's the believers I'm worried about. 384 00:19:54,994 --> 00:19:56,953 Stan, your guests are here. 385 00:19:56,986 --> 00:19:58,447 Send them in. 386 00:19:58,480 --> 00:20:00,937 I thought they were going to send one guy. 387 00:20:00,970 --> 00:20:03,427 Two people... Twice as much fun. 388 00:20:03,460 --> 00:20:05,419 If I were babe Ruth, 389 00:20:05,452 --> 00:20:07,909 I'd be pointing toward the bleachers. 390 00:20:07,942 --> 00:20:09,569 Mr. Harbinger? Nice to meet you. 391 00:20:09,602 --> 00:20:11,063 I'm Moses Saxon. 392 00:20:11,096 --> 00:20:12,557 Oh, yeah, hi, Moses. 393 00:20:12,590 --> 00:20:15,445 You already know my associate, Ms. Kipling. 394 00:20:15,478 --> 00:20:17,935 How are you, Stan? 395 00:20:21,056 --> 00:20:22,849 Stan, talk to me. 396 00:20:22,882 --> 00:20:24,343 What's going on? 397 00:20:24,376 --> 00:20:25,870 She's a believer. 398 00:20:25,903 --> 00:20:29,190 Time is running out for people on this planet. 399 00:20:29,223 --> 00:20:31,946 No wonder you left me before I woke up. 400 00:20:31,979 --> 00:20:33,639 You two slept together? 401 00:20:33,672 --> 00:20:36,560 Okay, I don't think we should do this. 402 00:20:36,594 --> 00:20:38,054 We have a deal. 403 00:20:38,087 --> 00:20:39,814 We're back from commercial in 30 seconds. 404 00:20:39,847 --> 00:20:41,308 I say we blow it off. 405 00:20:41,341 --> 00:20:43,333 Surely you're not afraid of us. 406 00:20:43,366 --> 00:20:45,159 Don't flatter yourself. 407 00:20:45,192 --> 00:20:47,118 Unless you don't want your audience to know 408 00:20:47,151 --> 00:20:49,143 that you saw an alien several nights ago. 409 00:20:49,177 --> 00:20:51,235 What are you talking about? 410 00:20:51,268 --> 00:20:52,995 We're back in 20. 411 00:20:53,028 --> 00:20:56,713 You know the truth and you refuse to reveal it. 412 00:20:56,747 --> 00:20:58,207 Sit down. 413 00:20:58,240 --> 00:21:00,266 Trudy, set up their mikes. 414 00:21:00,299 --> 00:21:01,859 Okay. 415 00:21:06,208 --> 00:21:08,665 No, uh, editorializing. 416 00:21:08,698 --> 00:21:10,458 That's the deal. 417 00:21:10,491 --> 00:21:11,919 Hey, it's Stan harbinger. 418 00:21:11,952 --> 00:21:13,413 We're back at ya. 419 00:21:13,446 --> 00:21:17,629 Before the break, I told you we had a very special guest. 420 00:21:17,663 --> 00:21:19,223 Well, I lied. 421 00:21:19,256 --> 00:21:20,883 We have two guests. 422 00:21:20,916 --> 00:21:23,140 Our first is Moses Saxon. 423 00:21:23,173 --> 00:21:26,726 Moses is a creepy-Looking guy with bad skin 424 00:21:26,759 --> 00:21:29,880 who I haven't gotten to know yet 425 00:21:29,914 --> 00:21:32,204 and don't think I will. 426 00:21:32,237 --> 00:21:35,557 His cohort is Darcy... 427 00:21:35,590 --> 00:21:37,948 Darcy, what is your last name? 428 00:21:37,981 --> 00:21:39,541 Kipling. 429 00:21:39,574 --> 00:21:41,035 Kipling. 430 00:21:41,068 --> 00:21:42,961 Well, that's a different story. 431 00:21:42,994 --> 00:21:45,019 Darcy and I are old friends. 432 00:21:45,053 --> 00:21:48,007 In fact, you could say that we both know 433 00:21:48,040 --> 00:21:51,028 what the other looks like drunk and naked. 434 00:21:51,061 --> 00:21:53,186 Don't we, sweetie? 435 00:21:53,219 --> 00:21:54,514 Our agreement was... 436 00:21:54,547 --> 00:21:56,307 Eat me. 437 00:21:56,340 --> 00:22:00,391 Come on, Darcy, tell my listeners how good I was. 438 00:22:00,424 --> 00:22:02,449 You were great. 439 00:22:02,483 --> 00:22:04,442 Put a big smile on my face. 440 00:22:04,475 --> 00:22:06,632 And you put a big smile on mine. 441 00:22:06,665 --> 00:22:08,990 Two big smiles. 442 00:22:09,023 --> 00:22:11,015 I want to say that the believers 443 00:22:11,048 --> 00:22:13,339 have no quarrel with you, Mr. Harbinger. 444 00:22:13,372 --> 00:22:16,892 We believe in the truth as much as you do. 445 00:22:16,925 --> 00:22:18,585 Is that right? 446 00:22:21,008 --> 00:22:23,631 And the truth is, earth is being colonized 447 00:22:23,664 --> 00:22:26,021 by beings from another part of the galaxy. 448 00:22:26,054 --> 00:22:28,844 For the moment, their numbers are too few 449 00:22:28,877 --> 00:22:30,470 to guarantee success, 450 00:22:30,504 --> 00:22:33,824 so while they wait for more of their kind to arrive, 451 00:22:33,857 --> 00:22:36,944 they live covertly Inside people like Eldon Devries. 452 00:22:36,977 --> 00:22:40,364 Do you have an alien slumming inside of you? 453 00:22:40,397 --> 00:22:43,451 It is possible, and I'd have no way of knowing. 454 00:22:43,484 --> 00:22:46,672 Most aliens' hosts are ordinary people who are unaware 455 00:22:46,705 --> 00:22:48,929 of the awful thing living inside of them. 456 00:22:48,962 --> 00:22:53,146 But sometimes that control the aliens have, it breaks down. 457 00:22:53,179 --> 00:22:54,607 We don't know why. 458 00:22:54,640 --> 00:22:56,167 That's what happened to Eldon. 459 00:22:56,200 --> 00:22:57,661 He became aware 460 00:22:57,694 --> 00:23:00,781 and he in turn tried to make us aware through you. 461 00:23:00,815 --> 00:23:04,899 Which episode of Dr. Who did you steal this from? 462 00:23:09,712 --> 00:23:13,132 You saw Eldon Devries die, Mr. Harbinger. 463 00:23:13,165 --> 00:23:16,154 You saw the alien inside of him vacate Eldon's body. 464 00:23:16,187 --> 00:23:18,178 Why won't you tell the truth about it? 465 00:23:18,212 --> 00:23:20,104 Maybe because it didn't happen. 466 00:23:20,137 --> 00:23:21,631 You've been sensitized 467 00:23:21,664 --> 00:23:24,122 to the light frequency in which the aliens live. 468 00:23:24,155 --> 00:23:25,748 In fact, you've seen 469 00:23:25,782 --> 00:23:28,902 at least one other alien since Eldon, haven't you? 470 00:23:28,935 --> 00:23:32,222 You told Ms. Kipling yourself that you have seen aliens, 471 00:23:32,255 --> 00:23:35,608 that you saw the alien that emerged from Eldon Devries. 472 00:23:35,642 --> 00:23:37,501 Your listeners deserve to know 473 00:23:37,534 --> 00:23:40,224 what you said the other night. 474 00:23:40,257 --> 00:23:41,751 The ugly truth 475 00:23:41,784 --> 00:23:43,577 about Eldon is, he was right. 476 00:23:43,610 --> 00:23:45,071 I didn't say that. 477 00:23:45,104 --> 00:23:47,628 The ugly truth comes out. 478 00:23:47,660 --> 00:23:50,649 It was something... Inside of him. 479 00:23:50,682 --> 00:23:52,608 An alien? Yeah. 480 00:23:52,641 --> 00:23:54,068 It's insidious. 481 00:23:54,102 --> 00:23:55,961 There's nothing we can do about it. 482 00:23:55,994 --> 00:23:58,151 There's nothing we can do about it. 483 00:23:58,184 --> 00:24:00,376 This tape is completely fabricated. 484 00:24:00,409 --> 00:24:02,966 Are you saying that it's not your voice? 485 00:24:02,999 --> 00:24:04,360 Do tell us the truth. 486 00:24:04,393 --> 00:24:07,547 What did you see as Eldon Devries was dying? 487 00:24:07,581 --> 00:24:09,473 Just say it, Mr. Harbinger. 488 00:24:09,506 --> 00:24:11,432 Tell the audience what you saw. 489 00:24:11,465 --> 00:24:12,959 Stan! 490 00:24:15,481 --> 00:24:17,838 What the hell were you thinking? 491 00:24:17,870 --> 00:24:19,332 The guy set me up. 492 00:24:19,364 --> 00:24:22,321 Stan, you attacked the man on the air. 493 00:24:22,353 --> 00:24:25,341 I should have killed the son of a bitch. 494 00:24:25,375 --> 00:24:27,798 You're lucky he's not pressing charges. 495 00:24:27,830 --> 00:24:29,293 Don't be a jellyfish. 496 00:24:29,325 --> 00:24:30,787 You don't get it. 497 00:24:30,819 --> 00:24:32,779 Well, get this... It's over. 498 00:24:32,811 --> 00:24:34,770 You don't work here anymore. 499 00:24:34,802 --> 00:24:37,260 That's exactly what they want you to do. 500 00:24:37,293 --> 00:24:38,754 That's fine, that's fine. 501 00:24:38,786 --> 00:24:40,248 It's over. They win. 502 00:24:40,280 --> 00:24:43,237 Phil, you don't want to do this. 503 00:24:43,269 --> 00:24:44,731 Look, we're fired, okay? 504 00:24:44,763 --> 00:24:46,723 There's a trillion people out there 505 00:24:46,755 --> 00:24:48,714 who want to be in business with us. 506 00:24:48,746 --> 00:24:50,738 Provided you don't kill them first. 507 00:24:50,773 --> 00:24:52,200 I'll go a couple rounds with you. 508 00:24:52,232 --> 00:24:53,727 Go to hell, Jules. 509 00:24:53,761 --> 00:24:55,619 You wish you could do what Stan does. 510 00:24:55,653 --> 00:24:57,213 I'll remember that 511 00:24:57,247 --> 00:24:59,172 when I'm in syndication instead of him. 512 00:24:59,204 --> 00:25:01,196 I got to hand it to you, Darcy. 513 00:25:01,231 --> 00:25:03,655 You're a woman of many talents. 514 00:25:03,687 --> 00:25:06,144 I wasn't supposed to sleep with you. 515 00:25:06,176 --> 00:25:08,168 I did that because I wanted to. 516 00:25:08,203 --> 00:25:10,659 The truth is, Stan, I like you. 517 00:25:10,693 --> 00:25:13,116 Oh, yeah, well, I like you too. 518 00:25:13,148 --> 00:25:15,108 So what was that? 519 00:25:15,141 --> 00:25:18,097 Some kind of bonus? 520 00:25:18,129 --> 00:25:21,085 I didn't catch anything from you, did I? 521 00:25:21,117 --> 00:25:23,077 You have to believe me. 522 00:25:23,109 --> 00:25:26,097 Getting you thrown off the air was not our goal. 523 00:25:26,131 --> 00:25:29,085 All we wanted was for you to tell the damn truth. 524 00:25:29,119 --> 00:25:32,969 The truth? Like that tape you manufactured? 525 00:25:33,003 --> 00:25:34,531 We're at war, Stan. 526 00:25:34,563 --> 00:25:36,156 War changes everything. 527 00:25:36,191 --> 00:25:38,681 And the truth is, you have seen aliens. 528 00:25:38,714 --> 00:25:42,133 The woman in the bar. What was so unusual about her? 529 00:25:42,167 --> 00:25:44,622 There could be a thousand other explanations. 530 00:25:44,656 --> 00:25:48,606 Tell me about the sounds you've been hearing then. 531 00:25:48,641 --> 00:25:51,330 Most people who report sightings also report hearing 532 00:25:51,363 --> 00:25:53,586 the distinctive alien triple heartbeat. 533 00:25:55,746 --> 00:25:57,837 Look, 534 00:25:57,870 --> 00:25:59,929 given the right time, place, 535 00:25:59,961 --> 00:26:01,821 circumstances. 536 00:26:01,853 --> 00:26:03,348 Are you going to deny 537 00:26:03,382 --> 00:26:05,208 the headaches you've been having? 538 00:26:05,240 --> 00:26:07,530 They're terrible, and they never go away. 539 00:26:07,565 --> 00:26:09,889 It's the light that's doing it. 540 00:26:09,921 --> 00:26:12,478 Our human brains don't normally perceive 541 00:26:12,510 --> 00:26:14,379 the light frequencies in which the aliens exist. 542 00:26:14,403 --> 00:26:16,130 But if you can see the light... 543 00:26:16,163 --> 00:26:17,923 you can see the truth. 544 00:26:17,956 --> 00:26:22,007 You should see all the evidence we've accumulated. 545 00:26:22,040 --> 00:26:23,999 Stan, let us help you 546 00:26:24,032 --> 00:26:26,953 before the aliens start screwing with you. 547 00:26:26,987 --> 00:26:30,538 They want you to think that you're going crazy. 548 00:26:30,573 --> 00:26:32,100 I'm not going crazy! 549 00:26:42,026 --> 00:26:44,616 How do you feel about that guy killing himself because of you? 550 00:26:44,650 --> 00:26:45,911 I'm Eldon. 551 00:26:45,944 --> 00:26:47,637 Been waiting, waiting for you. 552 00:26:47,669 --> 00:26:49,895 He's trying to get out! 553 00:26:52,916 --> 00:26:54,875 They're inside people. 554 00:26:54,908 --> 00:26:57,000 Lots of people. 555 00:26:57,032 --> 00:26:58,494 But it's not my fault. 556 00:26:58,526 --> 00:27:00,851 Do tell us the truth. 557 00:27:00,885 --> 00:27:03,606 You saw an alien emerge from him, didn't you? 558 00:27:03,640 --> 00:27:05,865 You're saying that it's not our voice? 559 00:27:05,897 --> 00:27:09,151 It's the light that's doing it to you, Stan. 560 00:27:09,183 --> 00:27:10,952 If you can see the light... you can see the truth. 561 00:27:10,976 --> 00:27:13,266 It's the believers I'm worried about. 562 00:27:13,301 --> 00:27:15,824 Surely you're not afraid of us, Mr. Harbinger. 563 00:27:15,857 --> 00:27:18,347 That tape is completely fabricated. 564 00:27:18,381 --> 00:27:24,689 They want you to think that you're going crazy. 565 00:27:24,721 --> 00:27:27,577 I don't know why I didn't see it before, 566 00:27:27,609 --> 00:27:31,063 that's the kind of garbage these bastards are into. 567 00:27:31,095 --> 00:27:34,183 Now, mind you... 568 00:27:34,217 --> 00:27:37,072 This isn't exactly what their alien looks like. 569 00:27:37,106 --> 00:27:39,032 The skin's not right, and the eyes. 570 00:27:39,064 --> 00:27:40,525 Oh, my god! 571 00:27:40,558 --> 00:27:42,019 I'm not making this up. 572 00:27:42,051 --> 00:27:43,513 What about Eldon, okay? 573 00:27:43,545 --> 00:27:45,173 Was he wearing a Mask? 574 00:27:45,206 --> 00:27:48,759 You're starting to sound like one of them. 575 00:27:48,792 --> 00:27:50,983 Stan, I've been talking to some people. 576 00:27:51,016 --> 00:27:52,976 Some of the smaller markets, 577 00:27:53,008 --> 00:27:56,163 real rathole stations with nothing to lose 578 00:27:56,195 --> 00:27:58,983 and they might be willing to give us a shot. 579 00:27:59,018 --> 00:28:01,442 Are you interested? 580 00:28:01,474 --> 00:28:04,396 Trudy, I think you hit on something. 581 00:28:04,429 --> 00:28:08,147 I'm so glad to hear you say that. 582 00:28:08,181 --> 00:28:10,406 It's going to take some time, 583 00:28:10,438 --> 00:28:12,895 but if we can start with the smaller markets 584 00:28:12,927 --> 00:28:14,887 and then platform into the bigger ones... 585 00:28:14,919 --> 00:28:16,712 Eldon was one of them. 586 00:28:16,747 --> 00:28:18,373 He was in on it. 587 00:28:18,406 --> 00:28:21,493 They put on a whole show For my benefit, 588 00:28:21,527 --> 00:28:24,416 rig it with smoke and fire, 589 00:28:24,449 --> 00:28:26,906 yank a body out of the morgue. 590 00:28:26,939 --> 00:28:28,831 Don't you see, Trudy? 591 00:28:28,864 --> 00:28:31,454 Eldon's alive... I bet my life on it. 592 00:28:31,488 --> 00:28:34,142 He's alive, and I'm going to prove it. 593 00:28:36,334 --> 00:28:38,294 As far as I'm concerned, 594 00:28:38,326 --> 00:28:41,780 that Stan harbinger is the scum of the earth. 595 00:28:41,812 --> 00:28:44,269 I don't care that he's out of work. 596 00:28:44,301 --> 00:28:46,261 That's not going to bring Eldon back. 597 00:28:46,294 --> 00:28:47,755 Vindictive? 598 00:28:47,787 --> 00:28:49,714 Morty, don't you understand? 599 00:28:49,747 --> 00:28:53,166 I'm not suing him for me, I'm suing him for Eldon! 600 00:28:53,200 --> 00:28:55,158 My head is splitting. 601 00:28:55,192 --> 00:28:57,716 I've got to go lie down. 602 00:30:06,539 --> 00:30:10,324 I don't know how far away it was. 603 00:30:10,357 --> 00:30:14,739 All I know is that it was, or that it seemed like it was. 604 00:30:14,773 --> 00:30:16,300 That sounds right. 605 00:30:16,332 --> 00:30:17,795 We know they use 606 00:30:17,827 --> 00:30:20,914 that spectrum of light for transport and communication. 607 00:30:20,949 --> 00:30:23,372 I didn't give him any of it, Moses. 608 00:30:23,404 --> 00:30:25,994 No... maybe he found it on-Line. 609 00:30:26,028 --> 00:30:28,850 Moses! I saw something, all right? 610 00:30:28,882 --> 00:30:31,173 Something I cannot explain. 611 00:30:31,207 --> 00:30:34,527 Something that is beyond my realm of comprehension! 612 00:30:34,559 --> 00:30:38,842 Do you think I invited you here because I wanted to hang out? 613 00:30:43,225 --> 00:30:45,085 Is that really necessary? 614 00:30:45,117 --> 00:30:46,810 Yes. 615 00:30:46,845 --> 00:30:50,296 It's the only thing that works for my headache. 616 00:30:53,717 --> 00:30:55,244 I believe him. 617 00:30:55,276 --> 00:30:56,770 Thank you. 618 00:30:56,804 --> 00:30:59,195 We'll put a watch on the house. 619 00:30:59,228 --> 00:31:02,681 A watch? People need to know about this. 620 00:31:02,714 --> 00:31:06,101 For the moment I prefer that we not tip them off. 621 00:31:06,133 --> 00:31:09,188 But there is an alien living in that house 622 00:31:09,220 --> 00:31:11,679 having lightwave conversations with... 623 00:31:11,711 --> 00:31:15,794 with some kind of starship. 624 00:31:15,828 --> 00:31:18,352 Will you listen to me... 625 00:31:18,384 --> 00:31:20,642 I got to go. That's it? 626 00:31:20,674 --> 00:31:22,137 Look, I believe you. 627 00:31:22,169 --> 00:31:23,630 I want to help! 628 00:31:23,663 --> 00:31:25,490 We'd prefer that you didn't. 629 00:31:25,523 --> 00:31:27,448 Stan, when you lost your job, 630 00:31:27,482 --> 00:31:29,307 you compromised your usefulness to us. 631 00:31:29,339 --> 00:31:31,100 Right now you're a pariah. 632 00:31:31,132 --> 00:31:32,661 A pariah? 633 00:31:32,694 --> 00:31:35,582 For Everyone's sake, just do as you're told. 634 00:31:35,615 --> 00:31:38,602 One minute you want me to tell the world 635 00:31:38,637 --> 00:31:41,789 we're surrounded by aliens, the next minute 636 00:31:41,824 --> 00:31:44,579 you want me to shut up about it. 637 00:31:46,073 --> 00:31:48,796 There's something else you should know. 638 00:31:48,829 --> 00:31:50,422 You're in a lot of danger. 639 00:31:50,455 --> 00:31:52,913 It's best if you lie low. 640 00:31:52,945 --> 00:31:54,772 If you don't, they'll come for you. 641 00:31:54,805 --> 00:31:56,266 You're a threat. 642 00:31:56,299 --> 00:31:57,859 More of a threat than you are? 643 00:31:57,893 --> 00:31:59,319 We can't see them. 644 00:31:59,353 --> 00:32:01,179 If they did come for us, 645 00:32:01,212 --> 00:32:02,972 they know they'd be proving us right. 646 00:32:03,004 --> 00:32:06,490 Stan, your only hope is to just disappear. 647 00:32:11,305 --> 00:32:12,766 Thanks for coming, Trudy. 648 00:32:12,800 --> 00:32:14,160 I got an idea. 649 00:32:14,194 --> 00:32:17,447 We get as many stations as we can, all right? 650 00:32:17,481 --> 00:32:20,402 I don't care if There are 10 listeners. 651 00:32:20,434 --> 00:32:24,054 For the last couple of days, I've seen things... 652 00:32:24,088 --> 00:32:25,880 Things you wouldn't believe. 653 00:32:25,913 --> 00:32:28,072 I'm not sure I believe them. 654 00:32:28,104 --> 00:32:29,865 But they're real. 655 00:32:29,897 --> 00:32:31,857 They're real as can be. 656 00:32:31,889 --> 00:32:33,848 I got to be out there. 657 00:32:33,880 --> 00:32:36,106 I got to make noise about it. 658 00:32:36,139 --> 00:32:39,094 It's great to see that spark in you again, 659 00:32:39,127 --> 00:32:41,219 but the deal is gone. 660 00:32:41,251 --> 00:32:44,306 No, no, you've got to call them back. 661 00:32:44,338 --> 00:32:46,165 You get their numbers. 662 00:32:46,199 --> 00:32:47,792 I'll call them back. 663 00:32:47,824 --> 00:32:49,916 You need to get some help. 664 00:32:49,950 --> 00:32:52,207 No, no, no, no. 665 00:32:52,242 --> 00:32:54,466 Trudy, Trudy. 666 00:32:54,498 --> 00:32:58,183 I know... I haven't been... 667 00:32:58,217 --> 00:32:59,777 Yeah, you know, um, 668 00:32:59,811 --> 00:33:01,736 I got to tell you that I... 669 00:33:01,768 --> 00:33:03,728 I went back to Phil 670 00:33:03,761 --> 00:33:06,351 and I begged for our jobs back. 671 00:33:06,385 --> 00:33:07,844 He said yes? 672 00:33:07,879 --> 00:33:10,270 He gave me my job back. 673 00:33:10,303 --> 00:33:13,191 I'm producing Jules Mason's new show. 674 00:33:13,223 --> 00:33:15,979 You know, as soon as I feel like 675 00:33:16,011 --> 00:33:18,402 Phil trusts me again, I'll work on him. 676 00:33:18,436 --> 00:33:20,991 He'll bring you back, I know he will. 677 00:33:21,026 --> 00:33:22,486 Get out. 678 00:33:22,520 --> 00:33:24,214 Stan? 679 00:33:24,247 --> 00:33:26,338 No, go on, get out. 680 00:33:32,745 --> 00:33:34,505 So I say to the girl, 681 00:33:34,538 --> 00:33:37,326 "Honey, where did you get the implants?" 682 00:33:37,359 --> 00:33:40,845 I mean, she had breasts 683 00:33:40,879 --> 00:33:42,970 the size of howitzer casings. 684 00:33:43,004 --> 00:33:45,759 Bad boob jobs... Let's talk about it, people. 685 00:33:45,792 --> 00:33:47,253 Hey, Trudy. 686 00:33:47,286 --> 00:33:49,544 What's it like working with a sane person? 687 00:33:49,577 --> 00:33:51,935 For those of you not in the know, 688 00:33:51,968 --> 00:33:54,856 my producer used to work with Stan harbinger. 689 00:33:54,889 --> 00:33:56,914 Wow, only two weeks off the air, 690 00:33:56,948 --> 00:33:59,803 already relegated to the "where are they now?" file. 691 00:33:59,836 --> 00:34:02,724 Stan's doing just fine. He'll be back soon. 692 00:34:02,757 --> 00:34:04,417 But not on these airwaves. 693 00:34:07,903 --> 00:34:10,859 Wow, it looks like we have our first caller. 694 00:34:10,892 --> 00:34:13,879 Joe, do you have a bad boob job story? 695 00:34:13,913 --> 00:34:16,337 Yeah, I got a story, Jules. 696 00:34:16,370 --> 00:34:18,859 It's not about your boobs, is it, Joe? 697 00:34:18,893 --> 00:34:20,818 This is about something 698 00:34:20,852 --> 00:34:22,744 way more important than that. 699 00:34:22,777 --> 00:34:24,803 More important than boobs? 700 00:34:24,836 --> 00:34:27,724 Well, I guess that would depend on 701 00:34:27,757 --> 00:34:31,442 where the fate of the universe fits into your scheme of things. 702 00:34:31,476 --> 00:34:34,131 Oh, thanks for the call, Joe. 703 00:34:34,164 --> 00:34:35,758 I used to be a cynic, 704 00:34:35,791 --> 00:34:37,386 but then I saw something. 705 00:34:37,419 --> 00:34:39,443 Except when I saw it, 706 00:34:39,476 --> 00:34:43,727 I didn't want to accept that my view of the world 707 00:34:43,760 --> 00:34:46,382 could be so... 708 00:34:46,415 --> 00:34:47,976 wrong. 709 00:34:51,462 --> 00:34:54,450 Is that right, Joe? 710 00:34:54,484 --> 00:34:56,044 What did you see? 711 00:34:56,077 --> 00:34:59,065 I saw the truth. 712 00:34:59,098 --> 00:35:02,152 Aliens are real. 713 00:35:02,185 --> 00:35:03,679 They're here. 714 00:35:03,712 --> 00:35:07,265 They want our planet, and they're going to take it. 715 00:35:07,298 --> 00:35:08,958 Ladies and gentlemen, 716 00:35:08,991 --> 00:35:13,109 it seems we have a very special guest on the phone. 717 00:35:13,142 --> 00:35:15,400 That is you, Stan, isn't it? 718 00:35:15,433 --> 00:35:17,756 The believers were right about Eldon. 719 00:35:17,789 --> 00:35:21,574 When he died, the alien that lived inside him, 720 00:35:21,608 --> 00:35:24,562 he tried to escape. 721 00:35:24,595 --> 00:35:26,554 He died anyway. 722 00:35:26,588 --> 00:35:28,879 And I saw it. 723 00:35:28,912 --> 00:35:30,539 I believe you, Stan. 724 00:35:30,572 --> 00:35:32,531 You're the harbinger of truth. 725 00:35:32,564 --> 00:35:34,058 You wouldn't make up stuff. 726 00:35:34,091 --> 00:35:35,518 Look, you little pissant. 727 00:35:35,552 --> 00:35:37,378 I am not some crackpot. 728 00:35:37,411 --> 00:35:40,664 That's right up there with "I am not a Crook." 729 00:35:40,698 --> 00:35:42,989 Of course you're a crackpot, Stan. 730 00:35:43,022 --> 00:35:45,810 That's why you're there and I'm here. 731 00:35:45,844 --> 00:35:47,803 I'm warning you, Jules. 732 00:35:49,330 --> 00:35:50,890 Jules. 733 00:35:53,912 --> 00:35:55,936 Stan, I swear to god... 734 00:35:55,970 --> 00:35:58,460 Nice to see you too, Phil. 735 00:35:59,954 --> 00:36:01,913 Wow, size triple-Ds. 736 00:36:01,946 --> 00:36:03,905 Can I get a picture of them? 737 00:36:03,938 --> 00:36:05,897 Stan, don't! 738 00:36:05,930 --> 00:36:08,785 Get a picture of this. 739 00:36:10,412 --> 00:36:11,873 Please. 740 00:36:11,906 --> 00:36:14,330 Please, you've got to let me see Stan. 741 00:36:14,363 --> 00:36:16,852 The alien died because Eldon killed it. 742 00:36:16,886 --> 00:36:18,845 He forced it into the light. 743 00:36:18,878 --> 00:36:20,837 Our frequency is hard on them, 744 00:36:20,870 --> 00:36:23,327 just like their light frequency is hard on us. 745 00:36:23,360 --> 00:36:26,713 But they can survive if they're in a human host. 746 00:36:26,747 --> 00:36:29,901 I mean, look it up for yourself. 747 00:36:29,934 --> 00:36:32,490 Stan, we're trying to understand, 748 00:36:32,523 --> 00:36:34,980 but you've got to put down the gun. 749 00:36:35,013 --> 00:36:37,768 Stan, we're working to get you back on the air. 750 00:36:37,802 --> 00:36:39,860 But we need more time. 751 00:36:39,894 --> 00:36:41,288 Stop stalling! 752 00:36:41,321 --> 00:36:42,881 Communicate through the computer. 753 00:36:42,914 --> 00:36:46,235 Are you seeing these aliens because of the booze? 754 00:36:46,269 --> 00:36:48,692 I'm seeing it because of Eldon. 755 00:36:48,725 --> 00:36:50,750 He showed me the light. 756 00:36:50,783 --> 00:36:53,141 They're saying if you release one of us, 757 00:36:53,174 --> 00:36:54,668 they'll let you broadcast. 758 00:36:54,701 --> 00:36:59,947 I want this Mike hot now, or I'll empty the gun in him. 759 00:36:59,980 --> 00:37:03,533 They're saying they have to speak to you personally. 760 00:37:03,566 --> 00:37:06,753 You want these people to die, is that it? 761 00:37:06,786 --> 00:37:08,313 Oh, my head. 762 00:37:08,346 --> 00:37:12,331 The aliens think This is going to stop me, but they're wrong. 763 00:37:12,364 --> 00:37:14,488 You see, that's the problem. 764 00:37:14,521 --> 00:37:17,610 Eldon didn't know there was an alien inside him 765 00:37:17,643 --> 00:37:19,203 until the very end. 766 00:37:19,236 --> 00:37:22,257 I bet you if I went up to his wife right now 767 00:37:22,290 --> 00:37:26,905 and told her there was an alien inside of her 768 00:37:26,938 --> 00:37:29,063 she'd think I was insane. 769 00:37:29,096 --> 00:37:30,623 You are insane. 770 00:37:30,657 --> 00:37:32,483 I swear to god, Jules. Stan! 771 00:37:32,516 --> 00:37:36,533 Put us on the airwaves or there's going to be bloodshed. 772 00:37:36,567 --> 00:37:38,724 Relax, Stan. You win. 773 00:37:38,757 --> 00:37:40,683 We're putting you back on the air. 774 00:37:40,716 --> 00:37:42,177 Good! Do it! 775 00:37:42,210 --> 00:37:45,199 First I'm going to tell you the deal 776 00:37:45,232 --> 00:37:47,489 and it's not negotiable. 777 00:37:47,522 --> 00:37:50,311 I'm going to clear out this building, 778 00:37:50,345 --> 00:37:53,299 then you're going to release the girl. 779 00:37:53,332 --> 00:37:56,652 When she's outside and safe, you're back on the air. 780 00:37:56,686 --> 00:37:59,640 You have five minutes to say your piece, 781 00:37:59,673 --> 00:38:03,093 then you'll put down the gun and walk out. 782 00:38:03,126 --> 00:38:05,318 You're a man of your word, 783 00:38:05,351 --> 00:38:07,011 am I right? 784 00:38:07,044 --> 00:38:09,103 Then the way I just described it, 785 00:38:09,136 --> 00:38:11,128 that's how it's going to be. 786 00:38:13,054 --> 00:38:15,112 I'll see you. 787 00:38:16,639 --> 00:38:19,926 Get that transmitter cranked up. 788 00:38:19,959 --> 00:38:21,652 Yeah. 789 00:38:27,363 --> 00:38:29,321 Trudy, am I on the air? 790 00:38:29,354 --> 00:38:30,816 Loud and clear, Stan. 791 00:38:30,849 --> 00:38:33,305 You're coming out of every radio here. 792 00:38:33,339 --> 00:38:34,832 Good. 793 00:38:36,825 --> 00:38:39,548 I want to talk about the truth. 794 00:38:39,580 --> 00:38:41,638 You know the old saying 795 00:38:41,672 --> 00:38:46,751 "if you talk to god, it's called prayer. 796 00:38:46,784 --> 00:38:49,075 "If god talks to you, 797 00:38:49,109 --> 00:38:52,595 it's called paranoid schizophrenia." 798 00:38:52,628 --> 00:38:56,546 Well, when you think about What the aliens are doing, 799 00:38:56,579 --> 00:38:59,201 I got to hand it to them. 800 00:38:59,235 --> 00:39:03,485 Their strategy is brilliant... 801 00:39:03,518 --> 00:39:05,610 Divide and conquer. 802 00:39:05,643 --> 00:39:09,227 Make half the world think aliens Do exist. 803 00:39:09,261 --> 00:39:12,747 Make the other half think the first half is crazy. 804 00:39:12,780 --> 00:39:15,337 You keep playing 805 00:39:15,370 --> 00:39:21,014 the ends against the middle while you invade from the rear, 806 00:39:21,048 --> 00:39:25,895 till nobody knows what's what anymore. 807 00:39:25,928 --> 00:39:29,547 And the punchline to this great joke 808 00:39:29,580 --> 00:39:31,870 is that they get people like me 809 00:39:31,903 --> 00:39:33,531 to tell people like you 810 00:39:33,564 --> 00:39:36,054 that people like them don't exist. 811 00:39:37,581 --> 00:39:41,532 Let me tell you, I have been wrong. 812 00:39:41,565 --> 00:39:43,524 We are surrounded. 813 00:39:43,557 --> 00:39:45,516 Something's wrong with the signal. 814 00:39:45,549 --> 00:39:48,504 It's like we're kicking out at 10 Watts. 815 00:39:48,537 --> 00:39:50,496 Actually it's 2. 816 00:39:50,529 --> 00:39:52,488 That's what the police wanted. 817 00:39:52,521 --> 00:39:56,970 Frankly, I hate it that we gave in at all. 818 00:39:57,003 --> 00:39:59,460 Son of a bitch! 819 00:39:59,493 --> 00:40:02,082 They could be living inside you. 820 00:40:03,809 --> 00:40:05,436 Someone you love. 821 00:40:06,963 --> 00:40:08,722 You hear me, people? 822 00:40:08,756 --> 00:40:11,113 You know what I'm saying is True. 823 00:40:16,259 --> 00:40:17,786 Oh, my god. 824 00:40:20,674 --> 00:40:23,231 What the hell's happening to me? 825 00:40:23,264 --> 00:40:25,290 Oh. 826 00:40:28,875 --> 00:40:30,502 They're in me. 827 00:40:30,535 --> 00:40:32,859 They're in me. 828 00:40:32,892 --> 00:40:34,320 They're in me! 829 00:40:52,148 --> 00:40:54,207 I'm one of them. 830 00:40:57,029 --> 00:40:58,556 Jules, 831 00:40:58,590 --> 00:41:00,117 get out, get out. 832 00:41:00,150 --> 00:41:02,872 They're aliens, Jules. 833 00:41:02,905 --> 00:41:04,465 Run. 834 00:41:04,499 --> 00:41:06,358 Jules, you're surrounded. 835 00:41:06,391 --> 00:41:07,818 Run! 836 00:41:11,205 --> 00:41:13,662 Yeah, we're aliens, all right. 837 00:41:13,695 --> 00:41:15,089 Who isn't? 838 00:41:15,123 --> 00:41:17,181 Must have hurt like hell. 839 00:41:17,214 --> 00:41:19,140 Battle going on between your ears. 840 00:41:19,173 --> 00:41:20,634 Shame. 841 00:41:20,667 --> 00:41:23,555 He was so useful to us. 842 00:41:23,589 --> 00:41:25,979 Won't be easy finding another harbinger of truth. 843 00:41:26,013 --> 00:41:27,473 May I? 844 00:41:27,506 --> 00:41:29,100 No. 845 00:41:29,133 --> 00:41:31,125 Run, Jules. 846 00:41:35,143 --> 00:41:37,168 Damn, he killed the hostage 847 00:41:37,201 --> 00:41:38,994 before we could stop him. 848 00:41:39,027 --> 00:41:41,882 Then when he pointed his gun at us... 849 00:41:41,916 --> 00:41:44,272 you wanted the truth, Stan? 850 00:41:45,335 --> 00:41:46,763 Now you've got it. 851 00:42:21,257 --> 00:42:23,249 It's them. 852 00:42:23,283 --> 00:42:25,607 They're the ones. 853 00:42:25,640 --> 00:42:27,400 They did this to Stan. 854 00:42:27,433 --> 00:42:29,889 Get that nut out of here. 855 00:42:29,923 --> 00:42:32,347 They're not who you think they are. 856 00:42:32,380 --> 00:42:34,869 Listen to me, I'm telling you the truth! 857 00:42:34,902 --> 00:42:38,322 If we Mock that which we do not understand, 858 00:42:38,355 --> 00:42:40,812 we may learn too late 859 00:42:40,846 --> 00:42:44,764 that the penalty for such Arrogance is annihilation. 860 00:43:02,658 --> 00:43:04,617 Captioning performed by 861 00:43:04,650 --> 00:43:08,136 Western captioning service ltd. Vancouver, B.C. 1998 60883

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