Original subtitles

READ 'EM AND WEEP.

AWW, MAN.

BOY, DREW, IT'S GREAT

YOU'RE FINALLY OVER THIS MANAGEMENT/ EMPLOYEE,

I-CAN'T-SEE-LISA THING.

I DIDN'T WANT TO SAY ANYTHING,

BUT IT WAS GETTING KINDA STUPID.

YEAH, I THOUGHT SO, TOO.

HOW 'BOUT YOU, MARTHA?

SURE THING, FRED.

WOULD YOU GUYS STOP WORRYING?

LISA'S HERE AS MY FRIEND,

NOT AS DREW'S SECRET GIRLFRIEND.

I THOUGHT I WAS DREW'S SECRET GIRLFRIEND.

IT WAS AN EXPERIMENT,

AND IT FAILED, SO LET IT GO.

EVERYBODY ANTE UP.

OH, OSWALD, THIS ISN'T STRIP POKER.

I KNOW. I'M JUST OUT OF MONEY,

AND I'M BETTING MY SOCK.

DID YOU JOG TODAY? YEAH.

YEAH, WELL, HERE'S 5 BUCKS.

O.K., WHAT DO YOU SAY WE LIVEN THIS UP?

HIGH CARD HAS TO TELL

THE WEIRDEST PLACE THEY EVER HAD SEX.

HMMM...

ON A WOMAN.

WE HAVEN'T DEALT THE CARDS YET, OSWALD.

ON A TRAIN.

OSWALD.

JUST OUTSIDE OF TOLEDO.

O.K., YOU'RE DONE.

KING OF SPADES IS HIGH, LEWIS.

WEIRDEST PLACE, HUH?

I GUESS I'D HAVE TO SAY...

MR. TOAD'S WILD RIDE.

AT DISNEYLAND?

NO. THAT'S JUST WHAT SHE CALLED IT.

O.K., I FOLD.

AH, COME ON, DREW.

YOU'VE BEEN AROUND.

WHAT'S YOUR STRANGEST PLACE?

AH, COME ON,

THERE'S BEEN SO MANY, I DON'T WANT TO BRAG.

WHAT? ARE YOU AFRAID YOUR FRIENDS

WILL THINK YOU HAVE SEX?

SHUT UP. THEY KNOW I DON'T.

YEAH.

ALL RIGHT, THEN LET ME GUESS.

COULD IT BE IN YOUR CAR?

IN YOUR BED?

ON THE POOL TABLE TOMORROW NIGHT?

OH... OOH...

'KAY, LOOKS LIKE I WIN. EVERYBODY LEAVE.

DREW, I SAID TOMORROW NIGHT.

YEAH, I KNOW, BUT I GOT TO CALL MY MOM

AND TELL HER THE GOOD NEWS.

♪ MOON OVER PARMA, BRING MY LOVE TO ME TONIGHT ♪

♪ GUIDE HER TO CLEVELAND UNDERNEATH YOUR SILVERY LIGHT ♪

♪ WE'RE GOIN' BOWLIN' ♪

♪ SO DON'T LOSE HER IN SOLON ♪

♪ MOON OVER PARMA TONIGHT ♪

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY WARNER BROS.

HERE YOU GO, BUDS.

SO, UH, OSWALD,

ANY PROBLEMS AT THE JOB INTERVIEW?

I DON'T THINK SO,

BUT I MAY HAVE GOTTEN SOMETHING BACKWARDS.

IS IT YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO LOOK HIM IN THE EYE

AND DON'T SCRATCH YOUR ASS?

COME ON. I HAVE DONE THIS BEFORE.

I'M NOT TOTALLY INEPT.

SO HOW DID IT GO?

NOT TOO GOOD.

YOU KNOW, YOU SHOULD NEVER ASK A WOMAN

IF SHE'S PREGNANT.

NO.

SO, YOU DIDN'T GET THE JOB.

NO. MAYBE IF I HADN'T RUBBED HER TUMMY AND SAID,

"HEY, YOU GOT A LINEBACKER IN THERE!"

UH-OH.

AN ANGRY MOB.

OH... THEY'RE JUST THE PEOPLE FROM YOUR STORE.

HEY, KATE.

OH, HI, LEWIS. HI, GUYS.

HOW'D THE UNION MEETING GO?

IT'S STILL GOING.

WE'RE TAKING A BREAK TO HAVE A FEW BEERS.

OH, YEAH? GONNA CELEBRATE THAT BIG, NEW CONTRACT?

I DON'T THINK SO, WE'RE HEADED FOR A STRIKE.

A STRIKE? BOY, YOU'RE KIDDING ME.

YOU KNOW, DREW, YOU MAY WANT TO LEAVE NOW.

WHY, 'CAUSE I'M MANAGEMENT?

LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHIN',

I'M JUST BARELY MANAGEMENT.

IF, UH, MANAGEMENT WAS A BIG DINNER,

I'D BE SITTIN' AT THE KIDDIE TABLE.

DREW, THIS IS NOTHIN' TO DO

WITH YOU BEING MANAGEMENT.

I JUST DON'T LIKE YOU.

BUT I-I DO LIKE YOU,

AND I STILL WANT YOU TO LEAVE.

COME ON. WAIT A MINUTE.

LET ME BE THE LAST VOICE OF SANITY YOU HEAR...

YOU CAN'T STRIKE A FEW WEEKS BEFORE CHRISTMAS.

YOU'LL SHUT DOWN THE STORE.

BESIDES, I HIRED EVERY DWARF IN CLEVELAND

TO RIDE THAT LITTLE TRAIN IN THE LOBBY.

OH, I'M SORRY, DREW,

BUT WE'RE JUST SICK AND TIRED

OF WORKING OUR BUTTS OFF FOR LOW WAGES

WHILE MANAGEMENT GETS FAT.

HEY, MAYBE MANAGEMENT HAS A SLOW METABOLISM.

YOU EVER THINK OF THAT?

I THINK MANAGEMENT'S GOT TO STOP

DIPPING HIS BUTTER COOKIES IN CHOCOLATE SYRUP.

WOW, HAVE YOU LOST TOUCH.

NOW YOU'RE JUST MR. BIG SHOT

SITTING WAY UP IN YOUR IVORY TOWER.

IVORY TOWER? IT'S A CUBICLE.

I SIT IN A PLASTIC CHAIR.

YOU WOULDN'T EVEN HAVE A JOB IF IT WASN'T FOR ME.

HOLD ON A MINUTE.

LOOK WHAT WE'RE DOING, DREW.

I MEAN, I APPRECIATE THAT YOU GAVE ME A JOB,

BUT IT LOOKS LIKE THERE'S GONNA BE SOME ROUGH SEAS AHEAD,

SO LET'S AGREE, RIGHT NOW, THAT IF THIS THING

EVER MAKES US FORGET THAT WE'RE FRIENDS,

WE'LL TAKE A TIME-OUT AND GIVE EACH OTHER A BIG HUG. DEAL?

ALL RIGHT.

O.K. DEAL.

YOU KNOW, I'M NOT AGAINST UNIONS.

I'M JUST SURE WE CAN SOLVE THIS THING

WITHOUT A BIG, UGLY STRIKE.

I USED TO BE A SALESPERSON.

I KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE.

I MEAN, I HIRED MOST OF YOU.

YOU'RE LIKE MY FAMILY.

KATE, LARRY...

YOU OVER THERE...

GUY WITH THE HAT...

THE WOMAN WITH THE SWEATER...

IF YOU REALLY WANT TO AVOID AN UGLY STRIKE,

GIVE US THE SCOOP

ON HOW MUCH MANAGEMENT'S WILLING TO BEND.

ALL RIGHT, IF IT'LL HELP SAVE CHRISTMAS FOR EVERYBODY,

I'LL SPILL MY GUTS.

OK...

HOW MUCH DO THEY HAVE IN THE BUDGET FOR RAISES?

I DON'T KNOW.

DO YOU THINK WE CAN GET MORE VACATION TIME?

I DON'T KNOW.

CAN WE GET MORE HEALTH-CARE BENEFITS?

I... DON'T KNOW.

LET'S TRY THIS ONE...

HOW CAN YOU BE ASSISTANT DIRECTOR OF PERSONNEL

AND BE SO COMPLETELY OUT OF TOUCH

WITH WHAT'S GOING ON IN MANAGEMENT?

I DON'T KNOW. WHAT HAVE YOU HEARD?

STRIKE! STRIKE!

All: STRIKE! STRIKE! STRIKE! STRIKE! STRIKE!

STRIKE! STRIKE! STRIKE! STRIKE! STRIKE...

BOY, DREW, YOU'RE ALL COVERED UP.

IS IT COLD OUT,

OR DID THE CITY PASS AN UGLY ORDINANCE?

I'M COVERED UP 'CAUSE I WAS TRYING

TO SNEAK THROUGH THE PICKET LINE.

I WOULD HAVE MADE IT, TOO,

EXCEPT SOMEONE POINTED ME OUT.

HEY, I DIDN'T SAY YOUR NAME.

NO, ALL YOU SAID WAS, "THERE'S THE CAUSE OF ALL YOUR TROUBLES,

AND THERE'S A PILE OF ROCKS."

OH, LET ME ADD THIS TO YOUR PILE.

THE FIRST WAVE OF INCOMPETENT TEMP WORKERS

ARE WAITING IN THE LOBBY.

LASHONDRA, COULD YOU SEND IN THE FIRST TEMP WORKERS, PLEASE?

LASHONDRA?

LASHONDRA'S ON STRIKE.

HELLO? WHO'S THERE?

HEAR THAT, MIMI?

ONE OF THE INCOMPETENT TEMP WORKERS HEARD THE PHONE RINGING

AND TOOK IT UPON HIMSELF TO ANSWER THE PHONE.

HI, THERE.

WHO'S THE EAGER BEAVER I'M SPEAKING TO?

HELLO?

WHERE'S THE VOICE COMING FROM?

HOW COME THERE'S SO MANY BUTTONS ON THIS THING.

HEY, LISTEN TO THIS...

I'LL MAKE SURE THEY FIND THEIR WAY UP HERE.

I GOT A POCKETFUL OF FEED CORN.

I BET YOU GOT MORE THAN A POCKETFUL.

PAYCHECK.

OH, NORA, AM I GLAD ACCOUNTING ISN'T ON STRIKE.

IT IS, BUT I'M MARRIED TO MY JOB,

AND I DO NOT CHEAT.

LOOK, UH, NORA,

I KNOW YOU AND I HAVE HAD OUR PROBLEMS IN THE PAST,

BUT I MAY NEED YOUR HELP ON SOMETHING.

YOU SEE, UH,

I MIGHT NEED TO HIRE SOME...

HOW DO I PUT THIS?

UNDOCUMENTED CANADIANS TO DO A LITTLE ODD JOBS AROUND THE STORE.

AHEM.

DO THEY HAVE WORK VISAS?

NOT EXACTLY...

BUT IT'S VERY COMMON. THEY COME HERE TO WORK

IN EXCHANGE FOR CIGARETTES

AND REGULAR BACON.

COME ON, CHEER UP. I'M MAKING A JOKE.

I'M TRYING TO BOOST MORALE AROUND HERE.

MY MORALE IS UP.

I'VE NEVER BEEN HAPPIER IN MY WHOLE LIFE.

HEY, DREW.

OSWALD, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

I'M HERE FOR A JOB.

HI.

I'M OSWALD.

I'M GLAD YOU FINALLY GOT THAT WORKED OUT.

YEAH.

OH, OK, EVERYBODY, I'M GLAD YOU'RE HERE.

WE HAVE OPENINGS ALL OVER THE STORE,

SO WHO HAS ANY SPECIAL TALENTS?

I CAN PLAY SWANEE RIVER ON THE TELEPHONE.

AND WE HAVE A PARKING ATTENDANT.

THANK YOU.

OK, GO-GETTERS,

THE PAYROLL DEPARTMENT'S RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER...

AND... LISTEN, WE DON'T HAVE

A REAL STRICT DRESS CODE HERE,

BUT IF YOU COULD WEAR SHOES TOMORROW, SIR?

THANK YOU.

YOU KNOW, DREW,

I DON'T WANT TO TAKE ADVANTAGE

OF OUR FRIENDSHIP AND ALL,

BUT COULD I HAVE A JOB WHERE I TRAVEL?

OK, BUT LISTEN, WHILE WE'RE SETTING THAT UP,

HOW ABOUT IF I START YOU OUT

IN, UH... COSMETICS?

COSMETICS? THAT'S A GIRL JOB.

PAYS 7 BUCKS AN HOUR.

HEY, I'LL CUT IT OFF FOR $7.00 AN HOUR.

DID I JUST HEAR

YOU'RE GIVING AWAY JOBS IN COSMETICS?

YEAH. "GIVING AWAY" AND "THROWING AWAY"

ARE 2 DIFFERENT THINGS, MIMI.

SEND ME IN, COACH. I AM READY. I CAN DO THIS.

MIMI, COME ON, THE COSMETICS COUNTER

IS RIGHT BY THE FRONT DOOR.

YOU DON'T HAVE A CHOICE.

YOU'RE UP AGAINST THE WALL, AND YOU NEED ME.

ALL RIGHT. I'M GIVING YOU A CHANCE,

BUT DON'T BLOW IT.

BLOW IT? FOR YOUR INFORMATION,

I'VE BEEN PUTTING ON MAKEUP

EVERY MORNING SINCE I WAS 12.

YEAH. MAYBE ONE NIGHT

YOU'LL ACTUALLY TAKE SOME OFF.

YOU CAN TAKE MY WORD FOR IT, MA'AM,

IT'S REALLY GOOD MAKEUP.

IT'S MADE IN FRANCE.

MMM.

SO YOU GOING TO BUY IT OR WHAT?

HMM. WAS IT TESTED ON ANIMALS?

YES,

AND THEY LOOKED FANTASTIC.

THAT'S NOT GONNA CUT IT, OSWALD.

YOU HAVE TO TEASE THE CUSTOMER.

WANT THIS MAKEUP? CAN'T HAVE IT.

YOU WANT IT? CAN'T HAVE IT.

WHO'S GOT THE MAKEUP?

I GOT THE MAKE UP. YOU WANT IT?

CAN'T HAVE IT.

SOMEBODY'S GOING TO LOSE AN EYE.

SO, SCABMEISTER, HOW WAS YOUR DAY?

TOTALLY INSANE. EVERYONE HATES ME

'CAUSE I HAVE TO HIRE THE PEOPLE TO FILL IN.

I DO ALL THE DIRTY WORK

WHILE THE BIGWIGS HIDE UP IN THEIR OFFICES.

"HEY, LOOK AT CAREY DOWN THERE

"RUNNING THROUGH THE PICKET LINE.

HE'S QUICK FOR A BIG MAN."

MERRY CHRISTMAS, EVERYONE.

IT'S A LITTLE EARLY, ISN'T IT, KATE?

WELL, I FIGURED OUT MY BUDGET,

AND BASED ON THE FIRST WEEK

OF THE STRIKE, I'LL BE BROKE

BY DECEMBER 24. SO...

OH, YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO DO ALL THIS.

KATE, THIS IS SO SWEET. YOU WENT OUT

AND BOUGHT US SOMETHING NICE

WHILE YOU STILL HAD THE MONEY.

OH, NAH. I GOT YOU CRAP.

I JUST DIDN'T WANT TO BRING YOU DOWN

CHRISTMAS MORNING.

I'M SURE IT'S NOT CRAP. I'M SURE THEY'RE GREAT.

HEY, LOOK, SHOES. WHAT A GREAT GIFT.

WAIT A SECOND. THESE ARE MY SHOES.

I KNOW. I POLISHED THEM FOR YOU.

MERRY CHRISTMAS.

WOW. MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU.

I CAN SEE MYSELF.

HEY, LOOK! I'M DISAPPOINTED

WITH MY CRAPPY GIFT!

NO, I LOVE IT. THANKS, KATE.

HEY!

A ROCK.

OOH.

YOU CAN NEVER HAVE TOO MANY ROCKS.

UNLESS THEY'RE ON TOP OF YOU.

WOW! IT'S AN EGG!

I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!

I PAINTED IT MYSELF, DREW.

OH, YOU'RE KIDDING. IT LOOKS STORE-BOUGHT.

HEY, SINCE WE'RE OPENING PRESENTS

LET'S OPEN THE ONES YOU GOT FOR US, DREW.

NO. THOSE AREN'T FOR YOU, THEY'RE FOR ME.

IT'S POSITIVE REINFORCEMENT.

EVERY TIME I DON'T OPEN THE REFRIGERATOR,

I GET MYSELF A GIFT.

WHAT'S IN THE BOXES?

UH, HAM.

WHAT'S THE MATTER, AFRAID YOU CAN'T TOP A ROCK?

ALL RIGHT, GO AHEAD,

BUT I WISH I'D GOTTEN YOU SOMETHING ELSE.

I BET IT'S MY WATCH.

OH, MAN.

OOH.

I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU GOT ME

THIS BEAUTIFUL SWEATER AND I GOT YOU AN EGG.

WELL, YOU KNOW, KATE, IT'S THE THOUGHT THAT COUNTS.

I DIDN'T REALLY EVEN THINK ABOUT IT EITHER.

I JUST GRABBED IT...

GRABBED IT FROM THE FRIDGE.

WELL, YOU HAD TO CARRY IT AL THE WAY OVER HERE.

YOU DON'T HAVE TO MAKE ME FEEL BETTER, DREW.

THIS ISN'T AN EASY TIME FOR EITHER OF US.

YEAH, TELL ME ABOUT IT.

MUST BE TOUGH FOR YA STANDING ON THE PICKET LINE

IN THE FREEZING COLD.

ALTHOUGH, WHEN YOU SET THE DELIVERY TRUCK ON FIRE,

THAT MUST HAVE WARMED YOU UP A LITTLE.

YEAH... YEAH.

HEY, HOW ABOUT YOU TRYING

TO REPLACE EVERYBODY?

I MEAN, THAT'S GOT TO BE TOUGH.

YEAH, BOY, IT'S KILLING ME.

I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THE REST OF THE STORE,

BUT THE COSMETICS COUNTER

IS PRETTY SPECIALIZED.

YOU REALLY HAVE TO KNOW YOUR STUFF.

OH, I DON'T KNOW.

HUG?

OSWALD?

YOU PUT OSWALD IN COSMETICS?

COME ON, REMEMBER OUR DEAL, KATE. HUG.

ALL RIGHT. YOU'RE RIGHT.

AWW... BESIDES, IT'S NOT JUST ME.

I'M BACKING UP MIMI.

HUG, HUG, HUG, HUG, HUG.

YOU PUT MIMI IN COSMETICS?

OH, GREAT.

WHY DON'T WE JUST PUT IKE TURNER

IN THE COMPLAINT DEPARTMENT?

HUG.

YOU'RE RIGHT AGAIN.

I'M OK.

I'M ALL RIGHT.

THIS IS NOT GOING TO END WELL.

IF... IF I STARTED THIS,

I'LL GLADLY GIVE UP THE JOB.

NO. IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT. YOU JUST NEED THE WORK,

AND DREW'S JUST DOING HIS JOB.

UNFORTUNATELY, DREW'S JOB IS TO HIRE

REPLACEMENT WORKERS TO BUST UP THE STRIKE

SO WE DON'T EVEN HAVE ENOUGH MONEY

TO BUY REAL CHEESE.

I HAD TO BUY CHEEZE WITH A "Z."

GEE, DID I SAY THAT? HUG.

YOU KNOW, I'M ONLY DOING THIS

TO KEEP THE STORE OPEN SO YOU HAVE A JOB

TO COME BACK TO.

I'M DOING THIS TO HELP YOU, KATE.

HELP ME?! IF YOU HELP ME ANY MORE,

I'M GONNA BE STARVING, BROKE, COLD... HUG!

EARDRUMS!

TURNING RED!

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

UHH...

YOU KNOW,

CHRISTMAS CAN'T COME TOO EARLY OR TOO OFTEN.

HUG?

OHH...

OK. AS IF TODAY HASN'T BEEN BAD ENOUGH,

I HAVE ANOTHER EMERGENCY.

THERE'S BEEN A COUPLE OF NO-SHOWS IN LINGERIE,

SO I'M FILLING IN WITH NORA.

THIS IS SOMETHING THAT'S COMING BACK TO HAUNT ME.

SO... IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS, CALL ME.

DO NOT LEAVE THE SALES AREA.

YEAH. WHATEVER.

AND DON'T BE RUDE TO THE CUSTOMERS.

FOR INSTANCE, IF SOMEBODY COMES UP TO YOU AND SAYS,

"HEY, HALLOWEEN WAS OVER A MONTH AGO,"

YOU WOULD SAY...

I'D SAY "HOW YOU GONNA ANSWER THAT PHONE

IF IT'S RINGING OUT OF YOUR BUTT?"

AND?

AND, "THANK YOU FOR SHOPPING

AT WINFRED-LOUDER."

EXCELLENT.

NOW, OSWALD, DID YOU FAMILIARIZE YOURSELF

WITH ALL THE PRODUCTS?

YES. YOU CAN ASK ME ANYTHING.

ALL RIGHT. UH, WHAT... UH... WHAT'S THIS?

POWDERY STUFF. MAKEUP OF SOME KIND.

AM I RIGHT?

YEAH, I GUESS SO.

OH. AND ONE LAST THING.

UH, AND YOU CAN'T REPEAT THIS TO ANYONE,

BUT THE COMPANY IS ON THE VERGE OF COLLAPSE.

I WISH I HAD SOMEONE BEHIND THE COUNTER

WHO KNEW THE FIRST THING ABOUT WHAT THEY WERE TALKING ABOUT,

BUT SINCE I'M STUCK WITH YOU GUYS,

WELL... GOOD LUCK.

WE'LL MAKE YOU PROUD, BUD.

HI. CAN I HELP YOU TO LOOK MORE LOVELY?

IS KATE WORKING TODAY?

NO, KATE'S ON STRIKE

BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T CARE ABOUT YOUR BEAUTY NEEDS.

MAY I HELP YOU?

WELL, I'M LOOKING FOR AN EYE SHADOW

IN SORT OF AN AQUAMARINE.

OH. LIKE THIS?

UH, NO. MORE ROSE TINT.

LIKE THIS?

YES, BUT DARKER.

OH, LIKE THIS? YES!

HAZELTINE SEA BREEZE NUMBER 14,

BUT YOU WON'T FIND IT IN STORES.

I MAKE IT AT HOME. SORRY.

OK, HERE'S YOUR WONDER BRA,

YOUR WONDER PANTIES.

HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY.

BOY, SOME GUY'S IN FOR A SHOCK

WHEN HE TURNS ON THE LIGHTS AND POURS SOME WINE

AND EVERYTHING HE'S INTERESTED IN

IS STILL IN HER UNDERWEAR. HEH HEH.

DO YOU HAVE TO TALK ABOUT WOMEN LIKE THAT?

I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT WOMEN.

I'M TALKING ABOUT HUMAN NATURE...

YOU KNOW, THE WAY PEOPLE TRY TO FOOL EACH OTHER.

THAT'S NOT HOW I'M LIKE.

I SAY, TAKE ME AS I AM, OR JUST DON'T TAKE ME AT ALL.

OH, LOOK. THERE GOES MY INTEREST.

HI.

WE'RE GIVING AWAY FREE MAKEOVERS TODAY.

SIT DOWN.

SIT DOWN!

YES. MR. BELL. YEAH.

YEAH. I KNOW THERE'S ONLY ONE GUY

IN SPORTING GOODS.

IT'S OK. HE'LL BE FINE. THERE'S GUNS THERE.

YEAH. I'M DOING THE BEST THAT I CAN.

THANK YOU, SIR. BYE.

Woman: EXCUSE ME! CAN SOMEONE HELP ME HERE?!

I'LL BE THERE AS SOON AS I CAN.

LISTEN, YOU STAY HERE AND GUARD THE REGISTER.

TRY NOT TO LOOK SO EMBARRASSED

TO BE HERE.

YEAH, THAT'S BETTER.

EXCUSE ME. I NEED SOME HELP

PICKING OUT SOME LINGERIE FOR MY WIFE.

WE'RE GOING TO TAHITI.

THAT SOUNDS FUN.

I'D LIKE SOMETHING KIND OF SHEER AND CLINGY.

YOU KNOW, KELLY AND I

ARE ALWAYS LOOKING FOR WAYS

TO HEIGHTEN THE ANTICIPATION OF INTERCOURSE.

THE... PRIMARY EXPORTS OF TAHITI

ARE VANILLA AND SUGAR CANE.

HEY, I LIKE THIS.

BUT I'M NOT SURE IT'D FIT.

SAY, YOU'RE ABOUT MY WIFE'S HEIGHT.

WOULD YOU MIND HOLDING THIS IN FRONT OF YOU?

OH... UH... UH...

COME ON.

I SUPPOSE THERE'S NO HARM.

OH, YEAH. THAT LOOKS HOT.

IT DOES?

ABSOLUTELY.

RUFF.

LOOK, THERE'S A STRIKE GOING ON,

WE'RE VERY SHORTHANDED.

DOES THIS LOOK LIKE YOUR MOTHER'S SIZE OR NOT?

EXCUSE ME, PLEASE.

I'LL BE RIGHT THERE.

LOOK, IT'S COMFORTABLE,

IT BREATHES, I THINK I CAN EVEN JOG IN IT.

GOOD.

BOY, THIS DAY'S NEVER GOING TO END.

OH, MY GOD, THERE'S MORE.

SOMEONE BURN THE NEST.

HAIRCUT?

DID YOU LOSE WEIGHT?

UH-UH.

IT'S A NEW SHIRT.

NOPE.

WHAT IS IT?

I'M WEARING MAKEUP.

YOU'RE KIDDING.

NOPE. YOU CAN'T SEE IT

'CAUSE IT'S CALLED "CONCEALER."

BOY, IF I SEE ONE MORE PAIR OF WOMEN'S UNDERWEAR...

I WOULDN'T WORRY ABOUT IT, DREW.

HEH HEH.

HOW MUCH LONGER IS THIS STRIKE THING

GONNA GO ON, DREW? IT'S BEEN 3 WEEKS.

I DON'T KNOW.

THE TEAMSTERS WON'T DELIVER MERCHANDISE,

THE MANAGEMENT'S ALL ON THE FLOOR,

AND RIGHT NOW THE DAY-CARE CENTER'S

JUST A BIG, NOISY CLOSET WITH A LOCK ON IT.

I SURE COULD USE A BEER RIGHT NOW.

HEY. I'M WORKING, I'LL BUY.

HEY, KATE. A COUPLE BEERS OVER HERE.

I TOLD YOU, I'M NOT A WAITRESS,

I'M A BUSGIRL.

KATE, WHEN DID YOU START WORKING HERE?

WAIT. LET ME TRY TO REMEMBER.

WAS IT BEFORE I GOT MY RENT OVERDUE NOTICE

OR AFTER MY CAT LEFT ME FOR A BAG LADY?

O'BRIEN, I DIDN'T HIRE YOU TO CHAT WITH YOUR BUDDIES.

IF YOU DON'T GET IT IN GEAR

AND CLEAN THE CRAP OFF THE TABLES,

YOU'RE OUT OF HERE.

IT WON'T HAPPEN AGAIN.

I'LL GET ON THE TABLES RIGHT AWAY.

THAT'S IT. THIS HAS GONE ON LONG ENOUGH.

KATE, I'M SO SORRY.

I DON'T KNOW HOW CAN I BE ON THE SIDE OF PEOPLE

THAT HAVE REDUCED MY FRIENDS TO THIS?

I'M KILLING MYSELF

TRYING TO KEEP THE STORE RUNNING

WITH A SKELETON CREW JUST SO THE COMPANY

CAN MAKE A FEW BUCKS.

I'M GOING ON STRIKE.

WHAT?

THAT'S RIGHT.

TOMORROW MORNING I'M ON THAT PICKET LINE.

WHEN YOU'RE OUT THERE

HOLDING THAT SIGN IN THE SLUSH,

I'LL BE THERE RIGHT NEXT TO YOU.

I DON'T CARE IF I RUN OUT OF MONEY,

I DON'T CARE IF I RUN OUT OF FOOD.

I AM NOT GOING BACK TO THAT OFFICE

AS LONG AS THERE'S DECENT PEOPLE LIKE YOU

FIGHTING FOR WHAT THEY BELIEVE IN.

AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED,

MANAGEMENT CAN JUST GO TO HELL.

HEY, DRINKS ON ME!

THE STRIKE'S OVER! WE WON!

WHOO!

YEAH, BABY!

WHOO! WHOO!

ALL RIGHT! WHOO!

WE WON!

WHOO!

WHOO...

PRETTY DARK THERE FOR A WHILE,

WASN'T IT, KATE?

HUG?

TIP?

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

HI. HEY.

HEY, OSWALD, WHAT'S THE OUTFIT?

WELL, I GOT USED TO HAVING A STEADY PAYCHECK,

SO I SPENT ALL DAY INTERVIEWING FOR ANOTHER JOB.

GLOBAL PARCEL HIRED ME FOR THE CHRISTMAS RUSH.

THIS IS FOR YOU.

THANKS.

AND THIS IS FOR YOU.

AND THIS IS FOR YOU.

THANKS, OSWALD,

BUT THESE ARE ADDRESSED TO OTHER PEOPLE.

NAH. THOSE ARE ALL UNDELIVERABLE,

SO THE EMPLOYEES GET 'EM.

SEE, YOU CAN'T TELL IF THAT'S A 3 OR A 5.

IT'S A 5.

HEY, YOU WANT YOUR CHRISTMAS PRESENT OR NOT?

OH, LISTEN, GUYS, I'M SORRY.

I HAVE TO ASK YOU TO LEAVE.

I GOT SO FAR BEHIND DURING THE STRIKE,

I GOT PAPERWORK UP TO MY EARS.

OK.

YOU WANT US TO HELP YOU CLEAN UP?

NO. BUT THANKS FOR THE GIFTS.

HEY, YOU BET.

THANKS. SEE YOU LATER, MAN.

SEE YOU LATER.

♪ I'M GONNA LOVE YOU, LOVE YOU, LOVE YOU ♪

♪ JUST A LITTLE MORE, BABY ♪

♪ I'M GONNA NEED YOU, NEED YOU, NEED YOU ♪

♪ EVERY DAY ♪

♪ I'M GONNA LOVE YOU, LOVE YOU, LOVE YOU ♪

♪ JUST A LITTLE MORE, BABY ♪

♪ I'M GONNA NEED YOU, NEED YOU, NEED YOU ♪

♪ EVERY WAY ♪

♪ LOVE YOU, LOVE YOU, LOVE YOU ♪

♪ NIGHT AND DAY ♪

♪ I'M GONNA LOVE YOU, LOVE YOU, LOVE YOU ♪

♪ NIGHT AND DAY ♪

HEY. HEY.

RIGHT ON TIME. DREW, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

YOU REMEMBER. YOU AND ME... POOL TABLE.

THAT LITTLE STRIKE GOT IN OUR WAY,

BUT NOW I'M ALL CHALKED UP,

AND I'LL BREAK.

WELL, YOU'RE NOT SERIOUS, RIGHT?

BUT YOU SAID, UH...

YEAH, BUT I WAS JOKING.

I THOUGHT I WAS COMING OVER FOR DINNER.

HEY, I WOULD NEVER HAVE COME

IF I THOUGHT THIS IS WHAT YOU HAD IN MIND.

IT'S A POOL TABLE, DREW.

OH, GOD. OH, MY GOD.

WHAT DID YOU EXPECT,

ME TO COME OVER IN SOMETHING LIKE THIS?

WELL, YOU GET THE IDEA, ANYWAY.

IT'S DECEMBER.

IT'S COLD AS HELL OUT HERE.

BRR.

♪ ...5 GOLDEN RINGS ♪

♪ 4 CALLING BIRDS ♪

♪ 3 FRENCH HENS ♪

♪ 2 TURTLEDOVES ♪

♪ AND A PARTRIDGE IN A PEAR TREE ♪

YOU KIDS KNOW ANY BARRY WHITE?

♪ I'M GONNA LOVE YOU, LOVE YOU, LOVE YOU... ♪

♪ JUST A LITTLE MORE ♪

SOMEHOW IT'S NOT THE SAME.

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY WARNER BROS.

CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE www.ncicap.org...