Original subtitles

Presenter: Chua I am

starring: Amy yip, man siu, hitomi kudo

Starring: Pal sinn

featuring: Ha chi-chun, satomi kaizuka, manfred wong, I am chung, sai gwa-pau

Cinematography: Lam Nai-choi lighting: Yuen ting-bong

art direction: Lau sai-wan image design: Karen sandhu

Screenplay: Tsang kwan Music: Chan fei-lit

production coordinator: Anna chim

producer: Johnathan chow

director: Lam Nai-choi

- what else can I get you? - That's all.

Young maid, what would you like to eat?

I'm only having a rest.

- A pot of tea, please. - Of course...!

Li'i mok? Those hand-kneaded pork buns over at aunt mao's steamed bun shop

sure as sure are big!

Right...! That fragrant bread and smooth filling.

They really are as big as a cup.

Your mum's big...! How's a cup big?

A teapot, now that's big...!

Don't believe me? I bought two of 'em just now.

Where are they?

Where they'd go? I'm sure I bought 'em.

They've disappeared!

Quit rummagin', then. Let's have a look around.

Go! Get lost!

Little maid, have you seen my two buns...?

Bro, she's the one who nicked 'em. She's hidden 'em on her body.

Hey, hey! Don't go mucking around here, you two...!

Step aside, you old fart...!

Gimme back my buns!

You want more?!

Get lost!

Young maid? They're a real nasty mob, that!

They'll call for reinforcements. Hurry on out of here!

Oi, show your hand.

Straight kill, straight kill!

Boss?!

Sonova...

What the hell happened to you two?!

Boss... It was a chick who did this to us...

Say what?!

You two blokes couldn't even handle some girly?

You deserve a smackin'!

- Boss... her kung fu really wasn't bad. - Yeah, yeah...

You can die with no regrets, then!

Shuffle the deck!

Boss?

- That chick's kung fu really was no joke. - What's that?!

She had three heads, six arms, green brows, and red eyes now?!

There's more... Her breasts were as big as a teapot!

- Yeah! It's true...! - Really?

She was in a low-cut top. It'll light your fire for sure!

Let's go!

I wanna see, too!

She's up ahead!

Why're you all just standin' around, then?!

Stop right there!

That's strange...

That's not her...!

Your mum, then?!

Is it or isn't it?!

The one you're talking about must be my little sister.

- You've got a sister? - She's called fei-fei.

She had an umbrella in her hand. Am I right?

- Yeah, she was holdin' an umbrella! - Yeah... that's right!

Li'i maid...

Your ii'i sister injured my brothers in a fight.

So... how are you gonna pay us back?

Why did they even get injured by fei-fei...?

- She... - She was stirrin' shit!

My sister never sees the bigger picture. And she doesn't even like men.

Unlike me, on the other hand, who can make friends with anybody.

For real?! So I...

You were born big, strong and handsome. You're also their big brother honcho.

What more could this humble lass ask for...?

This is killin' me! Here I come!

- Not yet... - What?! You're renegin'?!

There's five of you, but only one of me. How could I cope...?

Doesn't matter. Take care of me first. They'll have their turns after.

- Right. The boss is up first. - C'mon... line up, line up!

Quit squabblin'... I was here first.

Hey, you can stop bickering! I've got four sisters here with me.

Hey...?! Come out!

There... now everyone's a winner, no one loses out...!

You're mine!

Round as pearls, and smooth as Jade...!

It's a ghost!

Let's get outta here...!

I'm scared, I'm scared...!

They're gone now.

We only just moved here for taoist cultivation.

Who knew going out for a stroll would lead to so much excitement?

Remember to keep this from big sis when we get back.

She'll accuse us of showing off for sure.

I know.

Oh, speaking of big sis... Where has she gone today?

If wu-tung really makes it happen, I'll buy him a whole roast pig in return.

I heard second aunt from next door say he really does work!

Is that right?

Wu-tung god

- thank you. - Thank you very much.

Young lady? Here to worship?

Do you need to buy any incense and the like?

How come this wu-tung temple

is full of only women here to worship, and there's not a single man in sight?

Ah... you must be from out of town.

Oh, I only just moved here. I live a few miles away.

Oh... now then, the god here at wu-tung temple

is the god most understanding of the ways of men and women.

Any woman unable to conceive

will be expecting as soon as they offer up just a single prayer!

Come have a shop.

Set down a stick of incense first.

- Be careful now, it's hot. - I will, mother-in-law.

What a handsome and noble face!

Taoist master, be mindful.

Indeed, indeed...

In this lowly taoist's modest opinion though,

the one who needs be mindful should be you, young lady.

This lowly taoist's modest name begins hsuan and ends kuei.

Dare I ask the young lady's good name?

We are passing strangers; Neither family, neither friend.

There's no reason to exchange names. Let's just leave it alone.

Abandoning the righteous path and treading the crooked ways

runs contrary to the conduct of one cultivating the tao.

Old taoist, what the hell are you up to anyway?!

Whatever it is you have done, your heart should already well know.

What is it you reckon I've done, then?

In the presence of the demon god wu-tung, you became plagued with desire.

This will give rise to ceaseless torment, inviting fatal calamity.

Nonsense!

So many women visit wu-tung temple. Why then are you singling me out?

Am I not even allowed to have a fleeting thought or a passing look?

An ordinary woman can look and think all they want and it will do them no harm.

- You cannot. - Why?

The women are human. Humans and demons are unable to bond.

No matter how hard they look and think, their spirits will not connect.

- But you... - What about me?!

You are a 1000-year-old fox spirit, a beast of hide and horn.

Only through years of cultivation did you achieve a spirit form.

For becoming plagued with desire before the demon god,

a great calamity is now imminent!

That is fortunes are only permitted, granted by one's actions.

You must repent now!

Enough, old taoist! How dare you expose me, a lady?!

Take this!

Since you do not listen to reason, this lowly taoist will not force you!

If in future you need me, seek me out at Jade lake waterfall...!

Big sis.

You two have already cleaned the place up, right?

It took up a good part of the day. How's it look?

Cultivation is most concerned with the heart and mind.

The tao can still the heart; All that pervades the mind is tranquil.

The two of you should already understand this principle.

Big sis... you say this kind of thing all the time. How could we forget?

Although we may only be sworn sisters, everything I say is true.

You two must remember something.

Once another four-times-nine days pass,

we will be able to shed our animal hides, and reap the fruits of our cultivation.

During this time,

monsters and demons from within and outside the heart,

seizing an advantage, will try and strip us of our efforts,

ruining our ultimate tao of the golden elixir.

We cannot afford to let our guard down.

Alright, alright! We won't forget. You can take it easy.

In a place like this,

where are there monsters and demons from within and outside the heart anyway?

'Speak of cao cao and he doth appear'!

We only just arrived, who could possibly be looking for us?

Fei-fei, go and see who it is.

Young maid, how are you...?

Hey, madam?

Who are you looking for?

Hey?! Who are you...?

I live next door to you. My household's surname is wang.

Oh...? Should we address you as madam wang, then?

You can call me whatever you want...

Well... this place isn't too shabby all spruced up.

Please. Please make yourself at home.

Oh, you're too kind...!

Well... a house as big as this...

There's only the three of you living here?

That's right. It's only us three sisters.

What, only you three sisters and no man of the house?

No.

Oh, my! You don't say...?!

You three really are something...!

Girls nowadays are giving birth and becoming mums down the aisle.

There's so many of them!

Oh my, I really should get going.

Like they say: 'A distant relative is no close neighbour.'

I was only popping in for a visit...!

If you ever need anything in the future, all you've got to do is ask.

Just come and find me. No need to be shy...!

- Drop by whenever you're free...! - What a blabbing loudmouth...

She was only being neighbourly.

Where did you go?

Just next door to see who the new neighbours are.

Oh... didn't three maidens move in next door?

You haven't gone out all day. How do you know about those three?!

Ah, that's right... I haven't gone out all day.

Even little birdies need to go out for a stroll...

Hold it! How did you know? Tell me now!

I... saw them from the garden.

- You made a hole in the garden?! - No! I climbed up the wall and saw them...

Wifey... forgive me. I won't do it again! There won't be a next time!

I really won't do it again!

I won't... I really won't...

I can't hold it! I can't...

Why would the forefather statue fall over?

I think the old-timer cultivated so long even he needs a break.

Hey... don't make fun of the forefather.

It's late. Let's have something to eat and call it a night.

Help!

Help!

Stop runnin'!

Over here!

Help!

Help me!

Stop runnin'! Run and I'll chop you up!

Stop!

How can you just hurt another person in broad daylight?!

Li'i maid, you've come just in time.

Lemme slice open the kid first!

Then I'll take you up the mountain and we'll have some fun. Fun, hmm?

Boss, you alright?!

Let's scram!

C'mon!

This humble lad did not mean to touch the young lady.

Impropriety has occurred! Forgive me...!

Kind scholar, you had a brush with death. Why still speak of manners?

I remember now!

This humble lad... was being pursued by three bandits.

I fell over... and then...

I don't know what happened next.

I already drove away the three bandits for you.

The young lady is of the weaker sex. How did you drive the bandits away?

Oh... this humble woman once learnt a bit of martial arts from a famed master.

Who are you?

Why were those three men trying to kill you?

This humble lad is named wu, first name ming,

a scholar sitting the provincial imperial exam.

As the term is almost upon us,

I have been engaged in intense study in the dwelling up ahead

in preparation for the exam.

Today, I intended to go into town to pick up some provisions.

To think... I would encounter three bandits.

I almost lost my life.

I have yet to ask the young lady her good name.

This humble woman is named pai, first name su-su.

I thank the young lady for my rescue.

This humble lad takes his leave.

Are you alright?!

You can't!

- You can't... - Stop acting silly.

Scholar wu, with a limping leg like that, how can you make it back?

Allow me to carry you.

'Men and women's hands must not touch in an exchange.'

we can't! We can't...

But the sage also said: 'Hands may touch when sister-in-law is drowning.'

let's go.

Come on.

Be careful!

Sorry for troubling the young lady. We've arrived. I can go in by myself.

The saying goes: 'Accompany Buddha all the way west.'

what are a few more steps, then? Let's get you inside first.

This lowly man's modest abode is a simple one.

Unsuited for welcoming renowned men and elegant guests.

I am not an elegant guest, and far from a renowned man.

But you... you are a dirty man.

Go inside and change your clothes first.

Yes. Young lady, please make yourself at home.

You...

I tidied up for you. Is it satisfactory?

I was only gone for a moment.

In no time at all, you...

Scholar, things that men are unable to do

become so much easier once women get their hands dirty.

It is said: 'Men manage the exterior; Women manage the interior.'

how very true that is!

Didn't you mention that this house is home only to yourself?

Indeed.

- So you fix all the day's meals yourself? - Yes.

But doesn't that impede on your study?

- There's nothing you can do about that. - There is something.

Every other day, I'll head into town

and pick up some groceries and everyday items for you.

- You absolutely cannot do this. - And why can't I?

This humble lad is impoverished. I cannot afford to hire help.

Just when did I say I would charge you?

If you will not take my money...

My heart will be uneasy.

In that case, you can pay me a dollar a day.

- Really? - Just who's trying to swindle you?

- It still cannot be! - And for what reason...?

I am a man. You are a woman.

An unmarried man, an unmarried woman, living under the one roof.

If people were to find out...

My reputation would be ruined.

Your chastity would be called into question.

I wouldn't be here all the time. I'll just drop everything off and leave!

There's no problem, then.

Big sis, where have you been all day?

Oh, I only went out for a walk is all.

What's with her?

It's getting late so why hasn't big sis gotten up yet?

Big sis.

Once you've finished breakfast, get on with morning training.

- Where are you off to? - Out for a walk.

Don't wait up for me.

Scholar, apart from groceries, what else do you need?

This scholar lives an impoverished life. There's not really anything else I need.

Please make yourself at home.

Who is it?! Miss pai?!

Is it miss pai?!

Could it be that a poor scholar's home would be visited by thieves?

Who... _ my“.

My... name's fei-fei!

I don't know you!

I'm su-su's little sister.

Why... why have you come here, then?

I came here to look for my sister.

- I just happened on you bathing! - How dare you peep on me bathing...?!

You... you peep on men bathing.

This is deviant behaviour!

- Have you no shame?! - I'm sorry...

That's enough from you!

A girl no less... trespassing onto other people's property.

And peeping on someone bathing!

Have you no decency?!

This is a place for me to study.

Hurry up and leave. Get out...!

Get out now!

How dare this man call you shameless?!

He shouted at me and shooed me away...

This foul man must have a death wish!

Just what are you doing?!

- I'm going to get even! - Don't go...! I was the one in the wrong.

Second sister?! Second sister...?!

Thoughts flow out at nightfall, reflected by the stars and moon...

You foul scholar. How dare you bully my little sister?! Eat sword!

Let's see where you'll run to!

Don't come any closer! I'll splash you with water!

You want to splash me with water? I'll burn all your books, then!

Help!

Help!

This maiden will be sure to kill you today!

It's my life against yours!

- Then it's my life against yours! - You've grabbed onto me... you wanna die?!

Second sister.

- Hmm? Where's big sis? - She's back, doing evening training.

Second sister, what did you do with the scholar?

What's done is done. Just forget about him.

Second sister... you killed him?

No... but he's suffered enough.

What are you doing back here?

I'm here to ask you for forgiveness.

There's nothing between us.

It's what happened between you and my second sister.

I really am truly sorry. My second sister's got a rough temper.

Your second sister... was a bit too rough.

She's not like me.

When she gets into it, she can easily hurt others.

Let it go.

- She didn't really hurt me much. - You're lying!

Second sister hurt you so...

Let me wash your wounds first.

Second sister really took it too far.

She shouldn't have ravished you like this...!

Yeah... I did bring it on myself though.

She beat you up so bad, did she want to get someone killed?!

Hey? Time to get up.

Third sister...? Wake up...!

Hey...?

Is it real late already...?

The sun's high up in the sky already. Still not getting up?

Tired as hell...!

Where'd you go yesterday?

I went out for a walk is all...!

You're sounding just like big sis.

Hall of repentance...

Li hsiao-Mei's manual on calligraphy...

Chun-tzu theory...

- Miss pai. Please have a seat. - Who said I was here to sit?

I'm here to attend to any needs you may have.

I don't think I have any particular needs right now.

In that case, I'll tidy up the place for you.

Isn't the place... Pretty good at the moment?

- Then, I'll tidy up the bed for you. - Ah, to trouble the young lady yet again.

Wu ming?!

This hairpin, who left it behind?!

I bought it specifically in mind to give you as a gift. Is it to your liking?

You're lying.

This hairpin... It has the smell of grease.

It's obviously been used!

It was left to me by my mother when she passed away.

You're spouting nonsense. I'm leaving.

Miss pai...?

I beg you to remain calm. Don't leave.

You already have yourself another woman.

My staying here would be nothing but pointless!

And how could they possibly compare to you?

Who is she?

She is your little sister... fei-fei.

Fei-fei?!

You had relations with her?!

- When did this happen?! - Miss pai... don't be so angry.

Tell me!

This is what was left behind from your passion with fei-fei?

- N... no... - So there's yet another?!

Yes...

Well, who is it?!

It's your second sister... hua-hua.

My leg...!

Miss pai?

Miss pai?

Miss pai?! How are you feeling?

You knew well the two of them were my little sisters.

Why did you still...?

I also did it in spite of myself.

The two of them offered themselves up to me!

I've always had nothing but respect for you.

In my heart, I harbour no impure thoughts about you.

How come you won't have impure thoughts about me?

The young lady is clear as ice, pure as Jade.

I have never even thought about doing such things with you.

And how do you know I don't want it?

The young lady is well read and well mannered,

tender and virtuous,

observes the three obediences and four virtues,

speaks no impropriety, sees no impropriety,

hears no impropriety, and does no impropriety...

Y—young lady, you... you are faithful and devoted to your husband.

I... speak not beyond propriety.

I... see not beyond propriety.

I... hear... hear not beyond propriety.

Young lady, no... I do not beyond propriety.

Stop talking...

I've been waiting for you...

Wait.

Sit down.

There's something weighing on your minds.

Those engaged in taoist cultivation must speak what's on their minds.

I feel... it's not just the two of us. You also have something on your mind.

- Is that what you think? - Big sis? We can tell, you know?

And I'm not denying it.

Then you shouldn't force us.

How about this, then? We can only say one thing each.

Let out what's on our minds.

Alright.

You go first.

Big sis...

I'm sorry.

I stole your man!

Big sis, I'm sorry. I also stole your man.

Big sis, what about you?

I also stole your man.

Wu ming?!

And here I am.

- C'mon, drink...! - More wine?!

More food?

Wifey? I wanna do you...!

Piss off, you! Get this lady all hot and bothered,

then lie there like a dead snake every time!

But... I'm your husband!

How can you refuse...?

- Go to hell...! - Oh no! My 'ii'i husband'...!

Madam wang. Have you eaten?

So you have a guest?

Oh, just an ordinary guest.

Not so ordinary from what I can tell...

Oh my... morality truly is disappearing from the world...

You didn't even think it through.

Three virgin maidens keeping a man around their home. How indecent...!

Come on now, madam wang.

Our keeping a boyfriend doesn't affect you now, does it...?

Well, of course it doesn't affect me...

But that incessant hee hee ha ha causing such a racket... it's so uncouth!

Your shamelessness is your own business! Don't you know you're disturbing others?!

Don't cause trouble for your neighbours. You've gotten my husband all dopey!

Our apologies, madam wong. We were in the wrong.

Keep this up, and sooner or later, I'll report you to the village head!

Big sis? What was that?!

You let the bitch walk all over us!

Second sister, third sister. Madam wang had a point.

We have almost attained immortality, and cultivated a human form.

Another four-times-nine days,

and we'll have shed the bitterness of fur and hide forever.

With wu ming's arrival, our earlier efforts have become undone.

Big sis, so we...?

The sea of sin is boundless; Turn around and the shore is there.

It seems we have to expel our demons; Begin anew.

If not, once the golden elixir is ruined, we will revert to our original forms.

How could we attain the fruit of the tao then?

- Then what should we do? - Yeah.

We have to go inside and lay it all out with wu ming.

What is it?

It bothers you that I got up so late?

Wu ming, listen.

Go on, then.

This is a place for taoist cultivation. One mustn't fool around in a sacred place.

Since when?

Haven't we been having such a good time the last few days?

The last few days were different from today.

Keep this in mind from now on:

Don't come here anymore.

What should I do, then?

Finish your studies. Pass the exam and make a name for yourself.

I get it.

Someone must've been running their mouth off in front of you.

I don't want to pursue it any further.

If you three don't want me...

I just won't come here anymore, then.

Wu ming? If we want to see you, we'll come and find you.

That is something for another day.

Ah, let's not dwell on it. We'll have some fruit first.

When we're done eating... I'll take my leave.

Here...

Here.

For you.

- There's still a pineapple. - That's enough.

So itchy...!

So itchy...!

I'm so damn itchy!

Wife? What are you doing?

Husband, I beg of you... Consummate our marriage...!

I can't...!

I'm still haven't recovered from when you 'demolished my ancestral hall'. I can't!

Don't come any closer. No...!

I don't care! I'm your wife. How can you refuse me?!

No!

Hurry and find me a woman.

Otherwise, I'll soon die of old age...

Big sis?

Aren't you up early?

- Wu ming hasn't come by in a while. - His absence is only a good thing.

He'll only get in the way of our cultivation.

- Hmm? Where's fei-fei? - She hasn't gotten up yet.

How could this be?!

Third sister, what's wrong?!

I wanna die. I wanna die...!

Third sister, just what's happened?

Second sister, big sis. I'm reverting to my original form.

Just take a look...!

When I looked in the mirror just now, it showed my original form!

Don't cry.

- We need to think this through. - Big sis?!

Just why has this happened to us?

It's our training becoming undone.

This kind of degeneration can only be caused by our bodies reversing course.

Big sis, we haven't done anything. So why's our training being undone?

We have done something. It's wu ming.

Wu ming?!

It was only since wu ming intruded into our hearts

that something like this has happened.

It must have something to do with him!

Big sis? Wu ming is only human. How could he have violated our powers?

Right. On top of that, wu ming doesn't come by anymore.

He's only stopped coming by for the past few days.

There has to be something suspicious about his arrival.

He may have the help of some manifestation of wickedness

to take away our powers.

This is why we're reverting back to our original forms.

Well said. We have to find him and get to the bottom of this!

Big sis, second sister...

Just what kind of monster is he...? He's so terrifying!

Third sister, he's not a monster. He's a demon god.

The demon god wu-tung!

The demon god wu-tung?!

He's also known as wu-ming, wu-che, wu-yeh, ming-che, and tung-yeh.

He's a real trickster!

Big sis, I'm really scared!

We can't afford to offend him!

Let's just never look for him ever again and leave it at that!

We might not look for him, but he'll come looking for us.

What should we do, then?

You two head back first. There's somewhere I need to go.

Pai su-su... you come at last.

Taoist master.

This humble woman was ignorant, inviting demonic sin upon herself.

I come especially to taoist master for a way to avoid calamity.

Disaster and fortune in the mortal realm are invited on by man.

If you can invite it in, then why not ask it to leave?

Wu-tung is a fierce demonic god, imbued with evil magic.

This humble woman knows she is no match for him.

I have come today to beseech taoist master to draw his sword on our behalf.

Demons still subside in your heart... How can you vanquish wu-tung...?

Pai su-su...

There is no humanity in dead bones, just as demons are inhumane.

At the precipice between life and death, you still hesitate on what move to make?

Your guidance please, taoist master.

This lowly taoist offers up only eight words to you.

They are: 'Subdue magic with magic; Exorcise demons with demons.'

that is demons have sorcery, and immortals have magic.

How could you possibly lose to him?

This humble woman now understands. I bid you farewell.

Wu-tung

Why does it stink?

You've gone too far...!

I will have you die today leaving behind nothing to Bury...!

Attack!

Su-su.

Hua-hua.

Fei-fei.

Did something happen between the four of us?

I don't understand.

Come...

Let us make our way to the bed...

And we can have some fun together.

Quickly now... hmm?

Not so fast!

Blessed obscenity! They awoke from the dream; Extinguished their affections.

- What are you still scheming?! - Foul old taoist!

This demon god's affairs are his own. They don't concern you...!

To walk the path of righteousness is godly.

To commit to wickedness and perversion is demonic.

This lowly taoist will show you no mercy this time!

Treasured sword, punish the demon!

Return!

Evil is its own doing...

It cannot be allowed to exist.

Thank you, taoist master, for the kindness of our rescue.

Production manager: Arthur wong

assistant production managers: Sherman wong, kwan yuen-ling

assistant directors: Tony mou, Cheng wing-hang

focus puller: Mak hoi-man best boy: Wan kwok-gei

assistant art director: Luk Mei-ling makeup: Chow man-kuen

hair: Kau siu-mui wardrobe: Siu wing-yee

martial arts choreography: Philip kwok continuity: Tang juk-kwan

unit manager: Lam Kong-wa! Assistant unit manager: Fung chi-wa!

Props: Lai pak-shing tea lady: Kan chun-na

post-production: Simon leung

editing: Peter cheung, keung chuen-tak dialogue head: Ding yue

sound effects: Ronny ching music editing: Stephen shing

sound recording: Chow shao-lung sound mixing: Fu ling recording studio