Original subtitles

[exciting music]

* *

- We've got rogue Romulan factions closing in behind us.

- We leaving the Neutral Zone.

- The "Dauntless" has locked on to our coordinates.

They're hailing us.

- Jamming comms.

- How do our shields look?

- Shields at maximum.

- Ahh! Oh, we've got incoming!

[torpedoes pulse, all scream]

- Shields at 23%.

- Rok, send the message, Morse Code.

Fire off their bow.

- Do not contact, virus aboard.

- Nope, they don't get it.

They just think we're firing at them.

Round two inbound!

- Evasive maneuvers!

- Shields are gone, captain.

- We're caught in their tractor beam.

If they take our ship, the Living Construct activates.

- Then disable that beam. Open fire!

[tense music]

- Oh boy, they didn't like that.

Torpedo three coming our way!

- Brace for impact.

- End simulation.

[all groan]

- Oh, well, maybe we'll nail it the 87th time.

- Doesn't matter.

No matter what we try, we lose every time.

- We'll find a way out of the Neutral Zone.

We'll get to the Federation.

- Maybe it's time we consider

we stop trying to go to Starfleet.

- Wow. It's like a funeral in here.

- Might as well be.

Our dreams of joining the Federation are dead.

- You've been up for days. Get some rest.

What isn't present today might reveal itself tomorrow.

- In stressful times like this,

Jankom Pog knows just the solution.

- This does make me feel a lot better,

but what sort of lunatic would whip cream?

- Who was I kidding?

Starfleet is the best and brightest in the galaxy,

and I'm just some accident from a petri dish.

- Sounds like you earned yourself

two more scoops of sadness.

all: Pile it on! [laughter]

- That Tellarite officer said lots of mean things about me.

Jankom can take it, but to call me short...

[laughter]

all: Pile it on!

- What Jankom wouldn't give to slap his soggy jowls.

With words, of course. [laughs]

- I'd like to slap my father for all he's

put me through, with my hand.

[laughter]

- Let's hit the holo-sim at 0800.

- How about 08-whenever- Pog-wakes-up-hundred?

- [yawns, sighs]

Computer, turn everything off.

Let the darkness take me.

[soft mournful music playing]

* *

Computer, music off.

[computer chirps]

[music continues]

* *

- Huh?

- Did anyone else just see a feral human suffering

from malnutrition strolling around on our ship?

- No, but some odd-looking glittery puffball

is giving me kissy lips?

[alien chirping softly]

- Glittersmooch!

Glittersmooch! [giggles]

Oh my gosh, aren't you the cutest thing.

- Wow, you know that thing?

- I take care of them in my holo-sim,

"Delta Heart Magical Veterinarian."

- Look, I ain't judging,

but how did your holo-pet escape the holodeck?

- There must be a malfunction with the holo-emitters.

- That would explain the feral human.

- But it doesn't make sense.

These holograms aren't permitted

to leave the holodeck, unless--

I fear it may be far worse.

Friends, I believe we never left the holodeck at all.

- It wasn't real?

The ship?

The mess hall? [gasps]

The ice cream?

- All of them, fake.

- Not the ice cream.

- All of it, a simulation.

Computer, exit program. [computer chirps]

Computer, summon arch.

[computer chirps]

Janeway, can you read me?

- Loud and clear.

I'm detecting your life signs

inside the holodeck, all right,

but the arch refuses to respond.

A disruption in subspace could be interfering

with the ship's functions.

Try to sit tight while I get to the bottom of it.

- If we're all stuck in one room,

how is Zero all the way over there?

- Motion floor tracking, visual horizon manipulation.

A holodeck tricks the mind to create any scenario.

- I recognize this holo-program.

I often spend my recreational time here.

Come in, come in.

It's quite enjoyable.

[soft eerie music]

- Well, if we're trapped here a while,

we may as well enjoy it.

- Welcome to the headquarters of the Cellar Door Society,

purveyors of puzzling puzzles, amateur sleuthing,

and milquetoast mysteries.

- Yeah, this is a hard pass.

- I don't think we have a choice.

So what dorky task do we have to do?

Return an overdue library book? [chuckles]

- [scoffs] Dal, the Cellar Door Society

deals with precarious adventures,

like the Case of the Phony Pharaoh,

or the Case of the Biting Ghost, or the Case--

- Ooh, found a clue.

[blows raspberry] This is dumb.

Let's get out of here.

- You can tease all you want,

but every time I solve a mystery,

the program ends and the arch reappears.

- So if we play detective, we'll find a way out.

- All right, what's the mystery?

- It only reveals itself at the stroke of midnight.

[bell tolling] Aha!

[knock at door]

[suspenseful music]

The mystery is a feet.

Get it? Feet. It's at our--eh?

- "For the Cellar Door Society.

Together, you can solve the case."

- The sooner we solve the mystery,

the sooner we can leave the holodeck.

- Uh, it's just scribbles.

- Oh, yeah.

Jankom's having a blast already.

[Murf chirruping, grunting]

- Gwyn, use your linguistic skills.

What language is this?

- No language.

It's gibberish.

- Or maybe it's a clue.

- This sounds like a lot of work, Zero.

- Think, Dal.

The envelope said the clues were meant for us, together.

* *

- Murf, put your paper over mine.

Jankom! - Huh?

- Cellar Door Society, endless adventure

awaits you with the case--

- The Case of the Lost Skeleton Key!

That's what we're after to solve the mystery.

- Great, so we find a key, then this dumb holo ends?

- An excellent deduction.

- Sounds easy enough.

- [laughs] Skeleton key?

[scoffs] What's it made of? Bones or something?

- Don't look at me.

I'm just doing what everyone else is doing.

- What is that?

[engines revving] [driving rock music playing]

- And did we just get a music soundtrack?

* *

- [laughs]

Look at short stuff here.

Did you come to get stepped on?

- You know these guys, Zero?

- No, this is something different.

- [growls]

- Is it me, or do they all kind of look like--

- Yep.

[groans] It's my program.

Jankom's been using this street fighting sim

to let off some steam.

- I'm starting to worry one of these hooligans

knows something about our key.

- I'm not worried about getting hurt.

I'm worried our two holo-programs

have somehow merged.

- [groaning]

Leave the key to me. Hoo.

Stand back and watch me play.

* *

Who's got arms? Give us the key!

[grunts, laughs]

- [yelling] - Whoa!

- Okay, now I see why you all spend so much time in here.

- But don't worry, the safety protocols are on.

It is impossible to get hurt in here.

Whoa! [grunts]

[groans] Hey, that actually hurt.

- Oh, no.

- What happened to the safety protocols?

- They've been shut off.

[grunts] I don't think this is a game anymore.

Janeway!

- I'm trying to re-enable safety protocols out here,

but my settings only allow work

on non-essential functions. Dal, could you--

- Use my command code, GB64N32X!

Whoa! Ah!

This hologram really doesn't want us

to find the Skeleton Key.

- This isn't a game anymore.

- [shrieks]

- [growls]

[yelling]

- We could die in here!

[laughs]

- [grunts, yells]

[suspenseful music]

- The key.

Grab him--it may be our only way out of this program.

The tattooed ruffian flees.

* *

- Please?

[all panting]

- Shouldn't the arch be appearing right about now?

- You kids will never escape. [groans]

- His tattoo, it ain't just a key.

- The Key Club?

[all gasp]

- Where'd he go?

[thunder rumbling]

What's happening now?

[up-tempo jazz music playing]

- We've unlocked the next chapter.

[indistinct chatter]

[soft jazz music playing]

* *

- Whose simulation is this? - [laughs]

Uh, not mine. - [laughs]

Look what the cat dragged in.

Come on up here and give us a song, would you?

Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Murfy No Shoes!

- * So you're feeling blue and having a bad day *

all: Murf? - * Don't you fret it *

* Just smile and forget it *

[upbeat jazz music playing]

* With your cup half full *

* I swear those blues won't stay *

- Uh...what?

- Murf can speak? - And Murf can dance!

- Or convincingly lip sync.

- Let's split up and find the key

before things get any stranger.

- * If the skies are sometimes gray *

* The sun can... *

- Barista, could I get a Jumja tea?

You wouldn't happen to have seen a--

- Jumja tea coming right up.

- [gasps] How are you--?

[suspenseful music]

- You look like you've seen a ghost.

- My father's holo must have merged with the others.

- You know, I don't just serve drinks.

I listen as well.

- I guess I'm just surprised to see you here.

- [chuckles] Do we know each other?

- Not as well as you'd think.

- [gasps] - What are you looking at?

- Is that from--

- Yep, another patient from "Delta Heart Hospital."

- The further into the maze we go,

the more the simulations merge.

- There's thousands of programs in the databanks.

Why is it choosing all of ours?

- Ooh! Fascinating observation.

The holodeck may have more than a malfunction.

It has a motive.

- Are you saying this is happening for a reason?

- Anyone seen a skeleton key?

Looking for a skeleton key.

Hey, you, skeleton key?

Have you seen a skeleton key?

Anybody? Key? Skeleton?

[stammers]

[all growl]

Time to go-go.

- My father put the fate of our world on my shoulders,

without ever asking.

- Sounds like despite your pop's intentions,

you gotta find your own way.

- Speaking of, which way out of here?

- Get them! Over there!

No, not there! There!

- There are two mysteries at hand.

First, the Case of the Skeleton Key.

Second, the riddle as to why the holodeck

has trapped us here.

[upbeat jazz music playing]

- * You won't regret it *

* Just smile and forget it *

* *

- Hmm.

For such a swanky joint,

you'd think they'd fix that piano.

- Fix it?

- Sounds like it's got a missing key.

[gasps]

[key clicking softly]

both: The missing key!

[all gasp]

- Get them!

- The piano has a missing key!

- Let's pop this blow stand.

- I don't think that's how it goes.

- Move it, piano man.

[soft piano flourish]

- Spectacular. - Murf!

[gangsters shouting]

- To the next adventure. [all yelling]

[all yelling]

- The program's breaking down, merging with the others.

[soft adventurous music]

- Ahoy! Welcome back, Captain.

Prepare for a long journey.

- Uh... - Hah.

Okay, so I sneak in here once in a while too.

It's nice to have a crew that respects me.

- Fancy a snack, Cap'n? - No time.

The key has to be on board.

- All right, me hearties,

we're looking for a rare treasure,

a skeleton key!

- Aye-aye! - Aye-aye-aye!

- We'll find it. - We will find it!

- I shall go overboard to look!

[deep rumbling] [all gasp]

[water bubbling]

[creature roaring]

- [yells]

Monster! Off the port bow!

- No, no, no, no, no! [yelling]

[suspenseful music]

* *

- That's not a monster.

It's a sparkle sea-hugger!

My favorite!

- The corrupted holodeck programs are bleeding together

at a wildly dangerous pace.

- If we don't find that key pronto,

we're gonna be hugged to death.

* *

- No, Sea-Hugger! No more hugging!

Bad girl! Bad!

- [screaming] - [gasps]

* *

- This is from your sim, Rok.

How did you take care of it before?

- Uh...uh...

This poor creature is malnourished.

I prescribe fruit and fiber.

Fire!

[creature shrieking happily]

- Nice vet work, Rok.

Any chance you practiced ship repair too?

- I'm in my happy place,

surrounded by colorful creatures, snuggling.

- We're taking on water.

- [gasps] You really are a detective.

- Hey, guys, Murf found another clue.

- [chirping]

- Look, it's a compass.

- Pointing us to the Delta Heart Vet?

- [groans] This game never ends.

- Never ends.

Stop, we're not going anywhere.

- Easy for you to say. You can float.

- Yes, we could follow the compass,

but it'd just lead us to another clue, and another.

there is no skeleton key.

- [chirping angrily]

- Yeah, you said if we solve the mystery,

we get out of here.

- The missing key is a ruse to keep us preoccupied

from solving the real mystery:

why we're trapped in the first place.

Let me deduce.

At first, we would've never known we were in the holodeck

if it hadn't been for those glitches.

After Rok astutely observed our favorite

recreational simulations were involved,

I knew it couldn't be a glitch, a malfunction,

or even a disruption in subspace as Janeway noted.

It must be a calculated attempt to keep us here.

- You kids will never escape.

- Stay a while. Sing us a song, would you?

- Prepare for a long journey.

[suspenseful music]

- [grunts] Okay, someone did this to us.

Who and why? - Was it my father?

- No, but the culprit is on this very ship.

And the only way to win is if we refuse to play her game.

[all yelling]

- Thank goodness you're okay.

Why are you looking at me like you don't recognize me?

- Janeway, did you lock us in here

and turn off the safety protocols?

- Of course not. I would never.

- For all she knows, she's telling the truth.

But I fear she's unknowingly been manipulated

by a secret subroutine pre-programmed

to intervene if the ship's core directive

was ever interfered with.

Computer, show security feed of Hologram Janeway,

start of simulation.

- Maybe it's time we consider we stop

trying to go to Starfleet.

She wouldn't allow us to stray from the ship's mission.

- From the very beginning, she inspired us

to go to Starfleet.

Was it all a lie?

- No, because we had the same goal.

It wasn't until we all agreed we should never

go to Federation space that her sinister motives

for activated.

- Computer, create holo-program

to keep the crew distracted indefinitely,

no restrictions.

- Acknowledged.

- So you did turn off the safety protocols.

Then what did you need my command codes for?

- To take control of the ship so it would

complete its mission and destroy Starfleet.

- Use my command code, GB64N32X!

- Federation coordinates acquired.

- I'm so sorry.

I'd never intentionally do anything to hurt you.

- But the Construct would.

- I don't remember doing any of this.

I--I think Zero's correct.

There's something wrong with me.

[alarm blaring] [all gasp]

[tense music]

* *

- We've left the Neutral Zone.

- [groans] And we're locked out of the controls.

- I'm sorry.

[wondrous music]

* *