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1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,162
WWW.MY-SUBS.CO
1
00:00:04,506 --> 00:00:06,023
So?
(whispers): No.
2
00:00:06,025 --> 00:00:07,758
No. You-You were in.
3
00:00:07,760 --> 00:00:09,510
I said, "Have you met Ted"
and everything.
4
00:00:09,512 --> 00:00:11,128
How could that not work?
I don't know,
5
00:00:11,130 --> 00:00:13,130
we introduced ourselves,
I bought her a drink,
6
00:00:13,132 --> 00:00:14,348
told her I loved her...
7
00:00:14,350 --> 00:00:16,050
What?
I'm kidding.
8
00:00:16,052 --> 00:00:20,020
Hold on, Roxanne-- if that
really is your name.
9
00:00:20,022 --> 00:00:21,856
It's not. It's Robin.
10
00:00:21,858 --> 00:00:24,358
You played "Have You Met Ted"
without me?
11
00:00:24,360 --> 00:00:26,727
In my bar with my Ted?
12
00:00:26,729 --> 00:00:31,065
Maybe stealing a bro's wingman
is okay back in...
13
00:00:31,067 --> 00:00:34,434
I'm sorry, what's the name of
this third world banana republic
14
00:00:34,436 --> 00:00:35,953
you claim to be from?
15
00:00:35,955 --> 00:00:38,605
Canada.
16
00:00:38,607 --> 00:00:41,075
I have literally
never heard of that place.
17
00:00:41,077 --> 00:00:42,743
When'd you move
here, anyway?
18
00:00:42,745 --> 00:00:43,744
Two months ago.
19
00:00:43,746 --> 00:00:44,912
How do you like it?
Honestly,
20
00:00:44,914 --> 00:00:46,580
it-it's been
a little tough.
21
00:00:46,582 --> 00:00:49,467
I moved here for this on-air
reporter job at Metro News 1
22
00:00:49,469 --> 00:00:51,418
thinking it was gonna
be my big break,
23
00:00:51,420 --> 00:00:52,419
only to find out
24
00:00:52,421 --> 00:00:54,121
that our viewership
mostly consists
25
00:00:54,123 --> 00:00:55,306
of DMV waiting rooms
26
00:00:55,308 --> 00:00:57,508
and people plugging in their
TV for the first time.
27
00:00:57,510 --> 00:00:58,458
(chuckles)
28
00:00:58,460 --> 00:01:01,295
To top it all off,
I have no friends.
29
00:01:02,097 --> 00:01:04,598
Um... wrong.
30
00:01:04,600 --> 00:01:05,850
You have four friends
right here.
31
00:01:05,852 --> 00:01:08,135
Right, guys?
Uh, yeah.
32
00:01:08,137 --> 00:01:09,937
You're totally in our gang,
now. And once you're in,
33
00:01:09,939 --> 00:01:11,272
you're in for life, right?
34
00:01:11,274 --> 00:01:13,073
She's in.
Oh. All right.
35
00:01:13,075 --> 00:01:14,775
She's in.
Welcome.
36
00:01:14,777 --> 00:01:16,744
Well, if I'm in, I should
get the next round.
37
00:01:16,746 --> 00:01:18,195
Whoa, whoa,
Ooh,
38
00:01:18,197 --> 00:01:19,914
I like this girl.
ho, ho.
39
00:01:20,916 --> 00:01:23,117
I'm serious, I
like this girl.
40
00:01:23,119 --> 00:01:25,819
And we need some estrogen
up in this bitch.
41
00:01:25,821 --> 00:01:28,622
All we ever talk about
is Scotch and sports.
42
00:01:28,624 --> 00:01:30,657
Five Glen McKennas,
21 years, neat.
43
00:01:30,659 --> 00:01:32,710
And switch it
to the hockey game, 'cause
44
00:01:32,712 --> 00:01:35,095
my Canucks are gonna
bury the Bruins, yo.
45
00:01:35,097 --> 00:01:37,047
So here's the deal
with the deal.
46
00:01:37,049 --> 00:01:38,498
Robin's my new
best friend--
47
00:01:38,500 --> 00:01:39,967
nobody bangs her.
48
00:01:39,969 --> 00:01:40,935
Hey, hey,
49
00:01:40,937 --> 00:01:42,219
hey, she only rejected me
50
00:01:42,221 --> 00:01:44,438
three times,
she's still very much in play.
51
00:01:44,440 --> 00:01:46,390
I'm serious.
52
00:01:46,392 --> 00:01:49,860
There's only one way I'd let
either of you have sex with her.
53
00:01:49,862 --> 00:01:52,780
(gasps)
Not that. It's never that.
54
00:01:53,648 --> 00:01:54,732
I really want this girl
55
00:01:54,734 --> 00:01:56,400
to stay a part
of our lives.
56
00:01:56,402 --> 00:01:59,904
So the only way you're allowed
to hook up with her...
57
00:01:59,906 --> 00:02:02,522
is if you marry her.
58
00:02:02,524 --> 00:02:04,959
Too rich for my blood.
59
00:02:06,527 --> 00:02:08,362
TED:
That son of a bitch did it.
60
00:02:08,364 --> 00:02:10,664
He really did.
61
00:02:10,666 --> 00:02:12,750
So you're moving
to Chicago tomorrow, huh?
62
00:02:12,752 --> 00:02:14,752
How do you feel?
63
00:02:14,754 --> 00:02:16,637
Uh, I'm looking forward to it.
64
00:02:16,639 --> 00:02:18,005
The job's amazing.
65
00:02:18,007 --> 00:02:19,539
I got a great apartment
lined up.
66
00:02:19,541 --> 00:02:21,809
You know, it's...
67
00:02:21,811 --> 00:02:23,510
It's exciting.
68
00:02:23,512 --> 00:02:25,545
Onwards and upwar...
69
00:02:25,547 --> 00:02:27,765
♪
70
00:02:36,428 --> 00:02:40,428
♪ How I Met Your Mother 9x23 ♪
Last Forever, Part 1
Original Air Date on March 31, 2014
71
00:02:40,429 --> 00:02:45,429
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man
72
00:02:49,087 --> 00:02:50,588
♪
73
00:02:50,590 --> 00:02:54,174
BARNEY:
Hey! Bass player.
74
00:02:54,176 --> 00:02:56,910
It's me. The guy from
the drug store with the diapers
75
00:02:56,912 --> 00:02:58,545
that hit on you,
then we went outside
76
00:02:58,547 --> 00:03:01,548
and had a deep, emotional
talk on a bus bench.
77
00:03:01,550 --> 00:03:03,917
I ...I-I'm gonna be really
surprised if I have to be
78
00:03:03,919 --> 00:03:05,185
more specific than that.
79
00:03:05,187 --> 00:03:07,021
Remember when you
80
00:03:07,023 --> 00:03:08,422
told me to stop
messing around
81
00:03:08,424 --> 00:03:09,589
and go get the girl?
82
00:03:09,591 --> 00:03:12,276
Well, check it. I got her.
83
00:03:12,278 --> 00:03:13,978
(chuckles)
84
00:03:13,980 --> 00:03:16,864
What about you?
You still dating that guy?
85
00:03:24,656 --> 00:03:26,540
Grape Scotch
86
00:03:26,542 --> 00:03:28,659
Ted, Ted, Ted, Ted.
87
00:03:28,661 --> 00:03:30,127
Right here, right here,
Yeah,
88
00:03:30,129 --> 00:03:31,712
I-I see you, Barney.
right here, right here.
89
00:03:31,714 --> 00:03:33,163
Good, great. Then it's
time to play a little game
90
00:03:33,165 --> 00:03:34,381
I like to call Have...
Yeah,
91
00:03:34,383 --> 00:03:36,300
Barney, I...
No, no.
92
00:03:36,302 --> 00:03:38,302
You are not getting out
of Have You Met Ted.
93
00:03:38,304 --> 00:03:39,553
There's a girl
that you have to meet.
94
00:03:39,555 --> 00:03:41,839
She is perfect for you.
And has...
95
00:03:41,841 --> 00:03:43,474
she met you?
No, she has... not.
96
00:03:43,476 --> 00:03:45,726
Think of all the sex
you're gonna ha..
97
00:03:45,728 --> 00:03:47,094
Barney.
98
00:03:48,129 --> 00:03:49,629
I ha... I have to go.
99
00:03:49,631 --> 00:03:51,631
What, now?
100
00:03:53,801 --> 00:03:55,602
Yeah.
101
00:03:58,907 --> 00:04:00,407
Y...
102
00:04:00,409 --> 00:04:02,576
W-We have to do this outside.
103
00:04:09,868 --> 00:04:11,485
Robin.
104
00:04:12,370 --> 00:04:14,171
It's been a major pleasure.
105
00:04:14,173 --> 00:04:16,457
Major Pleasure.
Major Pleasure.
106
00:04:16,459 --> 00:04:18,658
(chuckles)
Come here.
107
00:04:21,529 --> 00:04:23,047
(whispers):
Congratulations.
108
00:04:23,049 --> 00:04:24,765
(whispers):
Thank you.
109
00:04:30,671 --> 00:04:33,974
Oh, God, no, this is too real.
110
00:04:33,976 --> 00:04:37,077
I can't handle this,
Marshall's next.
111
00:04:37,079 --> 00:04:39,179
Marshall.
112
00:04:40,899 --> 00:04:43,734
Good luck out there
in Chicago.
113
00:04:43,736 --> 00:04:46,120
I'm gonna be kind of jealous
of you, getting to have
114
00:04:46,122 --> 00:04:48,622
Gazzola's pizza
whenever you want.
115
00:04:48,624 --> 00:04:49,823
You're gonna be in Rome.
116
00:04:49,825 --> 00:04:52,793
Yeah. I guess.
117
00:04:59,033 --> 00:05:00,300
I just...
118
00:05:00,302 --> 00:05:03,470
I feel like a hug isn't enough.
119
00:05:03,472 --> 00:05:05,389
E.T. good-bye?
120
00:05:09,144 --> 00:05:12,896
(imitating E.T.):
I'll be right...
121
00:05:12,898 --> 00:05:15,715
here.
122
00:05:15,717 --> 00:05:17,851
Okay, it helped,
but that was really creepy.
123
00:05:17,853 --> 00:05:20,070
I don't want to see you for awhile.
(laughs)
124
00:05:22,273 --> 00:05:24,441
Barney.
125
00:05:25,493 --> 00:05:27,727
Mm.
126
00:05:29,614 --> 00:05:31,131
We licked the Liberty Bell.
127
00:05:31,133 --> 00:05:32,499
We did?
128
00:05:32,501 --> 00:05:34,251
Yeah, you...
129
00:05:34,253 --> 00:05:35,619
You don't remember that?
130
00:05:35,621 --> 00:05:38,255
Uh, I've done
a lot of cool stuff, Ted.
131
00:05:39,424 --> 00:05:42,075
Oh, my God.
132
00:05:42,077 --> 00:05:43,927
I just... I just realized:
133
00:05:43,929 --> 00:05:45,512
Who am I gonna high five now?
134
00:05:45,514 --> 00:05:47,765
(laughs) Come on, dude.
No, no,
135
00:05:47,767 --> 00:05:49,800
I'm being serious.
What if I see...
136
00:05:49,802 --> 00:05:52,519
a pack of lions
fighting a tyrannosaurus?
137
00:05:52,521 --> 00:05:54,054
Or, better yet,
138
00:05:54,056 --> 00:05:55,806
what if I see boobs?
139
00:05:55,808 --> 00:05:57,524
Who am I...
who am I gonna high five then?
140
00:05:57,526 --> 00:05:58,642
You can high
five Marshall.
141
00:05:58,644 --> 00:06:00,060
Yeah, yeah. But Marshall
142
00:06:00,062 --> 00:06:02,146
only likes to high five
about Lily boobs.
143
00:06:02,148 --> 00:06:04,064
Oh, always.
144
00:06:04,066 --> 00:06:06,283
Okay, Barney.
145
00:06:06,285 --> 00:06:08,202
I have an idea.
146
00:06:08,204 --> 00:06:10,154
One last high five.
147
00:06:10,156 --> 00:06:13,940
A high five to echo
throughout eternity.
148
00:06:13,942 --> 00:06:15,442
Yes.
149
00:06:15,444 --> 00:06:17,077
And within
that high five will be
150
00:06:17,079 --> 00:06:19,296
all the high fives
we've ever high fived.
151
00:06:19,298 --> 00:06:22,416
And all the high fives we
could ever possibly high five.
152
00:06:22,418 --> 00:06:24,384
A high infinity.
153
00:06:24,386 --> 00:06:25,919
A high infinity, exactly.
154
00:06:25,921 --> 00:06:26,953
Let's do this.
155
00:06:26,955 --> 00:06:28,455
All right,
everybody back up.
156
00:06:28,457 --> 00:06:30,641
Oh, boy.
157
00:06:33,761 --> 00:06:35,979
I'll see you
on the other side, Ray.
158
00:06:36,964 --> 00:06:39,149
Nice working with you,
Dr. Venkman.
159
00:06:39,984 --> 00:06:42,236
(Ted and Barney growling)
160
00:06:42,238 --> 00:06:44,238
TED and BARNEY:
Aah!
161
00:06:44,972 --> 00:06:47,191
(slap) Ow!
Ow!
162
00:06:47,193 --> 00:06:49,643
Oh. Oh.
Oh!
163
00:06:49,645 --> 00:06:50,777
Worth it.
164
00:06:50,779 --> 00:06:52,979
So worth it.
(short laugh)
165
00:06:53,981 --> 00:06:56,083
So I rushed out
to make the train,
166
00:06:56,085 --> 00:06:58,001
which is now 45 minutes late.
167
00:06:58,003 --> 00:07:00,487
This lady
with the bass guitar--
168
00:07:00,489 --> 00:07:02,089
was she pretty?
169
00:07:03,758 --> 00:07:05,592
♪
170
00:07:05,594 --> 00:07:07,344
Yeah.
171
00:07:07,346 --> 00:07:08,495
She was beautiful.
172
00:07:08,497 --> 00:07:09,963
Go back and meet her.
173
00:07:09,965 --> 00:07:11,465
No.
174
00:07:11,467 --> 00:07:13,433
But what if it was destiny?
175
00:07:15,854 --> 00:07:19,172
Lady, it's been
a really long weekend.
176
00:07:19,174 --> 00:07:21,975
I'm moving to Chicago tomorrow.
177
00:07:21,977 --> 00:07:24,361
I can't really
talk destiny right now.
178
00:07:24,363 --> 00:07:26,530
Okay.
179
00:07:34,522 --> 00:07:35,822
Yes?
180
00:07:35,824 --> 00:07:40,410
What if the universe
sent you a gigantic sign
181
00:07:40,412 --> 00:07:43,580
that this woman
was your destiny?
182
00:07:43,582 --> 00:07:45,198
Then would you talk to her?
183
00:07:46,751 --> 00:07:49,503
Yeah, sure. I mean,
I-I guess I would have to.
184
00:07:49,505 --> 00:07:50,504
Okay.
185
00:07:50,506 --> 00:07:52,556
Okay.
186
00:07:52,558 --> 00:07:54,040
Where is that train?
187
00:07:54,042 --> 00:07:56,677
Can I ask one more question?
188
00:07:56,679 --> 00:07:58,044
What?
189
00:07:58,046 --> 00:08:00,681
This girl with the bass guitar--
190
00:08:00,683 --> 00:08:02,382
is that her?
191
00:08:08,004 --> 00:08:09,688
That is her, isn't it?
192
00:08:09,690 --> 00:08:12,141
(whoops)
This is so exciting.
193
00:08:12,243 --> 00:08:13,576
G-Go talk to her.
194
00:08:13,578 --> 00:08:16,061
(whispers): All right. Just be cool,
lady. Damn.
195
00:08:16,063 --> 00:08:17,746
Why are you still
sitting here?
196
00:08:17,748 --> 00:08:21,267
Because I'm moving to
Chicago tomorrow, remember?
197
00:08:21,269 --> 00:08:23,002
And 24 hours
from now,
198
00:08:23,004 --> 00:08:26,505
my life is gonna be
completely different.
199
00:08:26,507 --> 00:08:29,425
MARSHALL: This is so strange,you know, now that Ted's
200
00:08:29,427 --> 00:08:33,479
gone, it's just a...
a different vibe.
201
00:08:33,481 --> 00:08:36,965
You can just f-feel
his absence.
202
00:08:36,967 --> 00:08:38,684
Are you kidding me?!
203
00:08:38,686 --> 00:08:39,735
Oh, hey.
204
00:08:39,737 --> 00:08:41,987
Ted, what are
you doing here?
205
00:08:41,989 --> 00:08:43,138
Just having a drink.
206
00:08:43,140 --> 00:08:44,573
What are you doing
in New York?
207
00:08:44,575 --> 00:08:46,108
Aren't you
supposed to be in Chicago?
208
00:08:46,110 --> 00:08:47,743
No... Oh.
209
00:08:47,745 --> 00:08:49,245
Yeah, I'm not doing that.
210
00:08:49,247 --> 00:08:50,646
What?
What?
211
00:08:50,648 --> 00:08:54,166
I'm not moving to Chicago.
Why?
212
00:08:54,168 --> 00:08:55,751
I met a girl.
You...
213
00:08:55,753 --> 00:08:57,203
son of a bitch!
214
00:08:57,205 --> 00:08:58,871
What is the matter with you?
215
00:08:58,873 --> 00:09:00,322
How could you put us
through that?
216
00:09:00,324 --> 00:09:03,292
That good-bye was
emotionally devastating.
217
00:09:03,294 --> 00:09:06,178
A certain delicate flower
cried all night in the shower.
218
00:09:06,180 --> 00:09:08,047
And I was pretty
bummed, too.
219
00:09:08,049 --> 00:09:09,048
And now you're
220
00:09:09,050 --> 00:09:10,549
staying because of some girl?
221
00:09:10,551 --> 00:09:12,718
I mean, who is
this person?
222
00:09:12,720 --> 00:09:14,520
The bass player
from the wedding band.
223
00:09:14,522 --> 00:09:15,971
Oh, yeah, she's great.
(gasps)
224
00:09:15,973 --> 00:09:17,106
Love her.
Right,
225
00:09:17,108 --> 00:09:18,674
right?
226
00:09:18,676 --> 00:09:21,110
What are you... What are you doing?
Calling her.
227
00:09:21,112 --> 00:09:23,596
Don't do this.
Don't call her the next day.
228
00:09:23,598 --> 00:09:24,763
You're blowing this.
Huh?
229
00:09:24,765 --> 00:09:26,682
Three days.
You wait three days,
230
00:09:26,684 --> 00:09:27,733
Ted.
Oh, the
231
00:09:27,735 --> 00:09:30,236
three day rule
is-is a childish,
232
00:09:30,238 --> 00:09:32,538
manipulative
mind game.
233
00:09:32,540 --> 00:09:34,740
But yeah, you
wait three days.
234
00:09:34,742 --> 00:09:38,160
H-Hey, it's Ted. Hi. Um,
235
00:09:38,162 --> 00:09:40,879
listen, do you ... do you want
to have dinner tomorrow night?
236
00:09:40,881 --> 00:09:42,364
Great.
237
00:09:42,366 --> 00:09:44,216
It was clear I meant
with me, right?
238
00:09:45,135 --> 00:09:47,670
Same answer. Solid.
239
00:09:48,805 --> 00:09:51,006
MARSHALL: Why does he keep
doing this?
240
00:09:51,008 --> 00:09:53,809
He meets 'em,
he likes 'em way too much,
241
00:09:53,811 --> 00:09:56,979
he goes way too big, too soon,
and he ends up blowing it.
242
00:09:56,981 --> 00:09:58,847
I can't take this anymore.
243
00:09:58,849 --> 00:10:01,734
He's fallen in love
so many times now.
244
00:10:03,737 --> 00:10:06,054
Not like this.
245
00:10:06,056 --> 00:10:08,223
This is different.
246
00:10:08,225 --> 00:10:10,559
Come on, go talk to her.
247
00:10:10,561 --> 00:10:12,611
Oh, and it'll all be
because of me.
248
00:10:12,613 --> 00:10:15,414
And I'll sing
at your wedding. (laughs)
249
00:10:15,416 --> 00:10:17,616
Y-You are gonna have
a big wedding, right?
250
00:10:17,618 --> 00:10:20,169
What? No.
Just be cool, lady. Damn.
251
00:10:22,088 --> 00:10:24,906
(sighs) And aren't big weddings
kind of a young man's game?
252
00:10:24,908 --> 00:10:27,075
You don't have a big wedding
in your 30s.
253
00:10:27,077 --> 00:10:28,961
If I do ever get married,
254
00:10:28,963 --> 00:10:30,679
I'm keeping it simple.
255
00:10:30,681 --> 00:10:32,848
BARNEY: A hot air balloon?
256
00:10:32,850 --> 00:10:35,134
Well, yeah. I mean,
when you're getting married
257
00:10:35,136 --> 00:10:37,603
in a 17th-century castle in
France and making your entrance
258
00:10:37,605 --> 00:10:39,138
on a stagecoach
with six white horses,
259
00:10:39,140 --> 00:10:41,273
you kind of got to make
a big exit. (chuckles)
260
00:10:41,275 --> 00:10:44,393
How much are you
spending on this?
261
00:10:44,395 --> 00:10:46,895
Oh, like, a lot of money.
262
00:10:46,897 --> 00:10:48,280
Mm.
All of my money.
263
00:10:48,282 --> 00:10:50,816
Look, I know you guys
have been traveling a lot,
264
00:10:50,818 --> 00:10:52,234
but you're coming, right?
265
00:10:52,236 --> 00:10:54,102
Oh course. What...
Duh.
266
00:10:54,104 --> 00:10:55,621
(short laugh)
(quiet laugh)
267
00:10:55,623 --> 00:10:57,105
I'll get the next round.
268
00:10:57,107 --> 00:10:58,157
Thanks.
269
00:10:58,159 --> 00:10:59,291
I'd offer, but...
270
00:10:59,293 --> 00:11:00,409
Castle.
271
00:11:00,411 --> 00:11:03,162
Yeah.
272
00:11:03,164 --> 00:11:04,780
So, how you guys doing?
273
00:11:04,782 --> 00:11:06,632
I mean, Robin's really
taking off at work, huh?
274
00:11:06,634 --> 00:11:10,252
It's like, "Robin Scherbatsky,
World Wide News, Caracas."
275
00:11:10,254 --> 00:11:13,088
"Robin Scherbatsky, World Wide
News, St. Petersburg."
276
00:11:13,090 --> 00:11:14,723
"Robin Scherbatsky,
World Wide News,
277
00:11:14,725 --> 00:11:17,176
anywhere but New York,
apparently." (laughs)
278
00:11:17,178 --> 00:11:18,460
But it's great.
279
00:11:18,462 --> 00:11:20,729
Uh, it's makes things
super difficult for us,
280
00:11:20,731 --> 00:11:23,599
but it's great. It's great.
281
00:11:23,601 --> 00:11:26,068
It's great. It's great.
282
00:11:26,070 --> 00:11:27,152
One more and I'll believe you.
283
00:11:27,154 --> 00:11:29,321
It's great. (laughs)
Sounds great.
284
00:11:29,323 --> 00:11:30,980
Hey.
Hi, hi. Sorry I'm late.
285
00:11:30,981 --> 00:11:32,260
Can I talk to you for a minute?
286
00:11:32,285 --> 00:11:34,645
Yeah, sure. Did you wire the
down payment to the castle guy?
287
00:11:35,145 --> 00:11:36,662
I got a castle guy.
288
00:11:36,664 --> 00:11:39,081
I've got, like,
three castle guys.
289
00:11:39,083 --> 00:11:41,784
And a moat guy, so...
290
00:11:41,786 --> 00:11:44,787
I didn't wire the
payment because
291
00:11:44,789 --> 00:11:48,140
I don't think we can get
married in September.
292
00:11:48,142 --> 00:11:50,192
What-What, why?
Because,
293
00:11:50,194 --> 00:11:52,160
when I do get married,
294
00:11:52,162 --> 00:11:54,797
I kind of want to fit
295
00:11:54,799 --> 00:11:57,666
in... my dress.
296
00:11:59,052 --> 00:12:00,969
Why wouldn't you f...
297
00:12:01,671 --> 00:12:02,771
No.
298
00:12:02,773 --> 00:12:03,772
Yeah.
299
00:12:03,774 --> 00:12:04,840
No.
Yeah.
300
00:12:04,842 --> 00:12:05,841
Yeah, yeah.
301
00:12:05,843 --> 00:12:08,026
Yeah.
Whoa. (laughing)
302
00:12:09,896 --> 00:12:11,397
What's going on?
303
00:12:11,399 --> 00:12:13,866
She's getting a boob job.
304
00:12:15,184 --> 00:12:17,536
LILY: We just peeked in on Penny
305
00:12:17,538 --> 00:12:18,954
asleep in the baby room.
306
00:12:18,956 --> 00:12:20,072
It's adorable.
307
00:12:20,074 --> 00:12:22,458
The whole place
looks great, guys.
308
00:12:22,460 --> 00:12:25,577
But I can't believe you let Ted
hang his jousting lance
309
00:12:25,579 --> 00:12:27,963
from the renaissance fair
on your bedroom wall.
310
00:12:27,965 --> 00:12:29,882
(chuckles)
Yeah.
311
00:12:29,884 --> 00:12:31,366
That's Ted's.
312
00:12:32,385 --> 00:12:33,886
So, Marshall, how's your job going?
Mm.
313
00:12:33,888 --> 00:12:36,037
My chair...
314
00:12:36,039 --> 00:12:38,123
is reasonably comfortable.
315
00:12:38,125 --> 00:12:40,392
For short periods of time.
316
00:12:40,394 --> 00:12:42,878
Marshall has decided to say
317
00:12:42,880 --> 00:12:45,681
only positive things about
being back in corporate law.
318
00:12:45,683 --> 00:12:46,715
So you hate it?
319
00:12:46,717 --> 00:12:49,718
Much of what I do does not
make me cry.
320
00:12:49,720 --> 00:12:52,488
But the job's only temporary.
321
00:12:52,490 --> 00:12:55,407
Marshall was offered
the judgeship once,
322
00:12:55,409 --> 00:12:57,159
and he turned it down for me.
323
00:12:57,161 --> 00:12:59,778
So, karmically, that phone
has to ring again.
324
00:12:59,780 --> 00:13:01,697
And even if it doesn't,
325
00:13:01,699 --> 00:13:03,499
today, when my boss
326
00:13:03,501 --> 00:13:06,401
threw his egg salad sandwich
at my face,
327
00:13:06,403 --> 00:13:08,337
some of it got into my mouth.
328
00:13:08,339 --> 00:13:10,339
And it was tasty.
329
00:13:10,341 --> 00:13:12,541
Hey, what
about you guys?
330
00:13:12,543 --> 00:13:14,009
How was Argentina?
331
00:13:15,578 --> 00:13:17,746
Great. It was great.
332
00:13:17,748 --> 00:13:19,097
It was great.
It was great.
333
00:13:19,099 --> 00:13:20,883
It was great.
It was great.
334
00:13:20,885 --> 00:13:23,752
It was great.
(chuckles)
335
00:13:23,754 --> 00:13:25,637
One more and I'll
believe you.
336
00:13:25,639 --> 00:13:26,939
(sighs)
(sighs)
337
00:13:26,941 --> 00:13:28,857
This is so not great.
338
00:13:28,859 --> 00:13:31,610
I'm sorry that I have
to work while I'm here.
339
00:13:31,612 --> 00:13:32,979
It's called being on assignment.
340
00:13:33,004 --> 00:13:35,365
Well, what about me? There's
no Wi-Fi in this hotel.
341
00:13:35,366 --> 00:13:37,483
How am I supposed to
run a business, Robin,
342
00:13:37,485 --> 00:13:39,234
with no Wi-Fi?
343
00:13:39,236 --> 00:13:41,453
It's not a business,
Barney, it's a blog, okay?
344
00:13:41,455 --> 00:13:43,372
It is a lifestyle blog.
345
00:13:43,374 --> 00:13:46,492
For the upscale, sophisticated
urban gentleman, and it's
346
00:13:46,494 --> 00:13:50,295
never gonna take off if I can't
post today's boner joke.
347
00:13:53,833 --> 00:13:55,584
I know I'm always traveling.
348
00:13:55,586 --> 00:13:57,920
We both hate it when
I'm gone, we both hate it
349
00:13:57,922 --> 00:14:00,722
when I drag you with me.
Neither of us is happy.
350
00:14:02,425 --> 00:14:04,476
Is this just not
working anymore?
351
00:14:04,478 --> 00:14:07,346
Wait, w... What "this"?
This-this?
352
00:14:07,348 --> 00:14:11,683
If I gave you an out,
right now--
353
00:14:11,685 --> 00:14:13,902
if there was
an exit ramp right here
354
00:14:13,904 --> 00:14:17,406
at the three-year mark--
355
00:14:17,408 --> 00:14:19,408
would you take it?
356
00:14:20,977 --> 00:14:22,327
Before I answer that,
real quick:
357
00:14:22,329 --> 00:14:24,646
you want to get super drunk
and have sex right now?
358
00:14:24,648 --> 00:14:26,415
Of course.
359
00:14:26,417 --> 00:14:28,917
And then, one thing
led to another.
360
00:14:28,919 --> 00:14:30,485
And then another.
361
00:14:30,487 --> 00:14:31,703
And then another
after that.
362
00:14:31,705 --> 00:14:33,088
Oh.
Oh.
363
00:14:33,090 --> 00:14:35,507
And we kept drinking, and
364
00:14:35,509 --> 00:14:38,126
may have had
a little... too much.
365
00:14:42,799 --> 00:14:44,182
Arigato.
366
00:14:44,184 --> 00:14:45,717
Wow, these rooms
all look the same,
367
00:14:45,719 --> 00:14:47,002
even when you're sober.
368
00:14:47,004 --> 00:14:49,471
You're sober?
369
00:14:51,524 --> 00:14:53,842
So, um...
370
00:14:53,844 --> 00:14:57,446
about what we discussed
last night.
371
00:14:59,015 --> 00:15:01,366
How do you feel?
372
00:15:08,491 --> 00:15:10,626
I love you, Robin.
373
00:15:13,663 --> 00:15:16,248
And when we got married,
374
00:15:16,250 --> 00:15:22,170
I made a vow that I would always
tell you the truth.
375
00:15:23,706 --> 00:15:27,809
We got divorced.
376
00:15:33,500 --> 00:15:36,086
I can't believe you got
divorced without telling us.
377
00:15:36,087 --> 00:15:38,721
This is my mom and
dad all over again.
378
00:15:38,723 --> 00:15:40,940
Barney, if you start
brewing your own beer now
379
00:15:40,942 --> 00:15:42,709
and nail my prom
date, so help me...
380
00:15:42,711 --> 00:15:44,277
Years too late on
one of those, Teddy.
381
00:15:44,979 --> 00:15:46,546
Guys, it's okay.
382
00:15:46,548 --> 00:15:48,581
This isn't
a failed marriage.
383
00:15:48,583 --> 00:15:50,233
It's a very
successful marriage
384
00:15:50,235 --> 00:15:52,118
that happened to
only last three years.
385
00:15:52,120 --> 00:15:54,120
You both want this?
386
00:15:54,122 --> 00:15:55,955
For real?
387
00:15:55,957 --> 00:15:57,957
We do.
388
00:15:57,959 --> 00:15:59,775
For real.
389
00:16:00,544 --> 00:16:03,429
Lily, you okay?
390
00:16:03,431 --> 00:16:04,964
Of course
I'm not okay.
391
00:16:04,966 --> 00:16:07,417
This ruins
everything.
392
00:16:07,419 --> 00:16:08,751
Now we have to choose sides,
393
00:16:08,753 --> 00:16:10,887
and obviously
we're gonna choose Robin,
394
00:16:10,889 --> 00:16:12,722
but Barney has his moments.
395
00:16:12,724 --> 00:16:14,223
MARSHALL:
I really liked
396
00:16:14,225 --> 00:16:15,641
the boner joke of the day.
397
00:16:15,643 --> 00:16:17,977
Look, you guys do not need
to pick sides.
398
00:16:17,979 --> 00:16:19,187
Nothing has to change.
399
00:16:19,212 --> 00:16:20,647
No. We've already
broken up before
400
00:16:20,648 --> 00:16:22,682
and we've stayed friends,
remember?
401
00:16:22,684 --> 00:16:26,652
As long as you promise me this
won't mean we stop hanging out.
402
00:16:26,654 --> 00:16:28,855
Okay.
403
00:16:28,857 --> 00:16:30,656
I'm serious.
I know, but, I mean,
404
00:16:30,658 --> 00:16:32,608
we hardly hang out anymore
anyway.
405
00:16:32,610 --> 00:16:34,643
They live in the suburbs now,
406
00:16:34,645 --> 00:16:36,662
and you two are about
to have baby number three.
407
00:16:38,315 --> 00:16:40,450
Please. You're so obvious.
408
00:16:40,452 --> 00:16:42,985
Your gals are back up
to a full C-cup,
409
00:16:42,987 --> 00:16:45,154
and you've been sipping
her drink all night long.
410
00:16:46,040 --> 00:16:47,590
We didn't want
to announce anything
411
00:16:47,592 --> 00:16:48,958
till we knew for sure.
412
00:16:48,960 --> 00:16:50,343
Oh, my gosh, Lily!
413
00:16:50,345 --> 00:16:51,928
That's amazing!
Oh, congratulations!
414
00:16:51,930 --> 00:16:53,996
Oh, my God.
Wait, see?
415
00:16:53,998 --> 00:16:55,631
This, right here,
416
00:16:55,633 --> 00:16:58,834
this is why we can't fall
out of each other's lives.
417
00:16:58,836 --> 00:17:01,437
We have to be here
for the big moments.
418
00:17:01,439 --> 00:17:03,856
Just promise me,
no matter what,
419
00:17:03,858 --> 00:17:06,692
we will always be there
for the big moments.
420
00:17:06,694 --> 00:17:10,846
I-I promise. We'll-we'll always
be there for the big moments.
421
00:17:11,698 --> 00:17:13,699
Mm.
See?
422
00:17:13,701 --> 00:17:16,519
It's like this whole divorce
thing never happened.
423
00:17:16,521 --> 00:17:17,787
(crying)
424
00:17:17,789 --> 00:17:18,988
I...
425
00:17:21,658 --> 00:17:23,042
Hey.
Hi, sweetie.
426
00:17:23,044 --> 00:17:24,627
How was work?
427
00:17:24,629 --> 00:17:27,830
My-my boss only called me
three words
428
00:17:27,832 --> 00:17:30,500
that meant "vagina" today.
429
00:17:31,301 --> 00:17:33,035
How are the kids?
Asleep.
430
00:17:33,037 --> 00:17:35,171
Good. This is working, right?
431
00:17:35,173 --> 00:17:38,257
Marvin and Daisy sharing a room
together? It's not too cramped?
432
00:17:38,259 --> 00:17:40,259
And then when the
next one arrives,
433
00:17:40,261 --> 00:17:43,229
we'll just put her
crib... in the shower.
434
00:17:43,231 --> 00:17:45,932
It's the perfect size.
It'll save time on cleanups...
435
00:17:45,934 --> 00:17:46,882
Let's move
somewhere bigger.
436
00:17:46,884 --> 00:17:48,851
Yes. Oh, thank God.
437
00:17:48,853 --> 00:17:51,387
I mean... You know,
438
00:17:51,389 --> 00:17:53,889
don't get me wrong.
I love this apartment.
439
00:17:53,891 --> 00:17:56,159
How do you say good-bye
to so many special memories?
440
00:17:56,161 --> 00:17:59,078
Cock-a-mouse!
We have to move!
441
00:17:59,080 --> 00:18:01,280
(dance music playing)
(laughs)
442
00:18:02,466 --> 00:18:06,002
Hey, Marshall.
Robin!
443
00:18:06,004 --> 00:18:08,337
Hey, I'm so glad you're here.
It's-it's been forever.
444
00:18:08,339 --> 00:18:10,006
Oh, hey.
Hey.
445
00:18:10,008 --> 00:18:11,707
Where's your...
where's your costume?
446
00:18:11,709 --> 00:18:14,293
Oh, uh, it's been
a crazy week at work
447
00:18:14,295 --> 00:18:16,045
so no time to go shopping.
448
00:18:16,047 --> 00:18:18,347
Uh, well, who are
you supposed to be?
449
00:18:18,349 --> 00:18:20,749
Okay, I want to make it clear
this is not my idea.
450
00:18:20,751 --> 00:18:22,552
I'm Captain Ahab.
451
00:18:22,554 --> 00:18:24,804
Why is it bad
if it was your idea?
452
00:18:24,806 --> 00:18:26,889
Robin, you made it!
A white whale. Got it. (chuckles)
453
00:18:26,891 --> 00:18:29,108
Aw. Hi.
Hi.
454
00:18:29,110 --> 00:18:30,610
Yeah, I figured,
455
00:18:30,612 --> 00:18:33,929
people are thinkin' it. Might as
well steer into the skid, right?
456
00:18:33,931 --> 00:18:35,615
Where's your costume?
457
00:18:35,617 --> 00:18:36,899
Oh, you know,
I've just been so...
458
00:18:36,901 --> 00:18:38,401
(squealing)
Oh, my God, Marshall!
459
00:18:38,403 --> 00:18:40,102
Guess whose digits
I just scored?
460
00:18:40,104 --> 00:18:42,405
The slutty
police officer's...
461
00:18:42,407 --> 00:18:44,740
tax attorney.
462
00:18:44,742 --> 00:18:46,275
Hey, Robin!
463
00:18:46,277 --> 00:18:48,077
Hey.
Didn't see you there.
464
00:18:48,079 --> 00:18:50,413
(chuckling nervously)
Saved it.
465
00:18:50,415 --> 00:18:51,914
Sorry, I got to pee.
466
00:18:51,916 --> 00:18:54,717
I-I'll be back
in... an hour.
467
00:18:57,971 --> 00:18:59,589
Oh, man.
468
00:18:59,591 --> 00:19:02,175
Is Ted still wearing
his hanging chad costume?
469
00:19:02,177 --> 00:19:04,227
How old is that thing?
It's gone
470
00:19:04,229 --> 00:19:06,962
from played out to
charmingly retro and back
471
00:19:06,964 --> 00:19:08,464
six or seven times now.
472
00:19:08,466 --> 00:19:09,932
Kind of
like Ted himself.
473
00:19:09,934 --> 00:19:12,101
Tonight it's working
for him though.
474
00:19:12,103 --> 00:19:15,771
ROBIN: How do you do this, Ted?How do you
475
00:19:15,773 --> 00:19:18,157
sit out here all night
on the roof in the cold
476
00:19:18,159 --> 00:19:21,060
and still have faith
your pumpkin's gonna show up?
477
00:19:21,062 --> 00:19:23,779
Look, I know that odds are
the love of my life
478
00:19:23,781 --> 00:19:25,831
isn't gonna magically walk
through that door
479
00:19:25,833 --> 00:19:27,650
in a pumpkin costume at...
480
00:19:27,652 --> 00:19:30,152
2:43 in the morning, but...
481
00:19:30,154 --> 00:19:33,873
this seems as nice a spot
as any to just, you know...
482
00:19:33,875 --> 00:19:36,475
sit and wait.
483
00:19:43,634 --> 00:19:45,851
Um...
484
00:19:45,853 --> 00:19:48,837
uh, c-can you tell Lily
I-I had to go?
485
00:19:48,839 --> 00:19:50,473
I got to split.
486
00:19:50,475 --> 00:19:51,774
(sighs)
487
00:19:53,977 --> 00:19:55,844
Speaking of splits, do you think
I can do a split in midair
488
00:19:55,846 --> 00:19:57,813
like my boy
David Lee Roth?
489
00:19:57,815 --> 00:19:58,681
I know you can't.
490
00:19:58,683 --> 00:20:00,349
Challenge accepted.
491
00:20:01,568 --> 00:20:03,786
(exhales)
492
00:20:05,822 --> 00:20:08,124
BARNEY:
Oh, my scrotum!
493
00:20:10,294 --> 00:20:11,860
(sighs)
494
00:20:15,799 --> 00:20:17,383
I can't get out
of this thing.
495
00:20:17,385 --> 00:20:18,801
I'm holding it.
496
00:20:18,803 --> 00:20:21,003
Wait, are you leaving?
Yeah,
497
00:20:21,005 --> 00:20:23,038
I got a big day tomorrow.
I got to get some sleep.
498
00:20:23,040 --> 00:20:26,058
No, you can't leave.
This is a big moment.
499
00:20:26,060 --> 00:20:28,477
We're saying good-bye
to the apartment.
500
00:20:28,479 --> 00:20:30,846
The whole gang has to be here.
501
00:20:30,848 --> 00:20:32,465
The gang?
502
00:20:32,467 --> 00:20:35,234
Do you know who the gang is
to me, Lily?
503
00:20:35,986 --> 00:20:36,902
Here's what the gang is:
504
00:20:36,904 --> 00:20:39,105
the gang is a married couple
505
00:20:39,107 --> 00:20:42,658
who I never see anymore,
about to have their third kid;
506
00:20:42,660 --> 00:20:44,694
it's my ex-husband,
507
00:20:44,696 --> 00:20:47,747
hitting on slutty cops
right in front of me;
508
00:20:47,749 --> 00:20:51,734
and it's the guy I probably
should have ended up with
509
00:20:51,736 --> 00:20:54,036
with the beautiful mother
of his child.
510
00:20:54,038 --> 00:20:56,289
I mean, who in their right mind
would call
511
00:20:56,291 --> 00:20:58,407
that group of people "the gang"?
512
00:20:58,409 --> 00:21:00,593
Oh...
513
00:21:02,412 --> 00:21:04,930
Oh, oh, so... so what?
514
00:21:04,932 --> 00:21:06,599
This is all
515
00:21:06,601 --> 00:21:08,351
just over then?
516
00:21:08,353 --> 00:21:11,804
Our whole friendship
is just over?
517
00:21:11,806 --> 00:21:14,857
No. No, of course not.
Look, we'll...
518
00:21:14,859 --> 00:21:17,610
we'll always be friends.
It's just...
519
00:21:17,612 --> 00:21:20,279
never gonna be how it was.
520
00:21:21,315 --> 00:21:22,598
It can't be.
521
00:21:22,600 --> 00:21:23,816
And that doesn't
522
00:21:23,818 --> 00:21:26,101
have to be a sad thing.
523
00:21:26,103 --> 00:21:28,571
There-There's so much
wonderful stuff happening
524
00:21:28,573 --> 00:21:31,106
in all of our
lives right now.
525
00:21:31,108 --> 00:21:33,409
Look, more than enough
to be grateful for.
526
00:21:34,444 --> 00:21:37,279
But the five of us
hanging out at MacLaren's,
527
00:21:37,281 --> 00:21:39,131
being young and stupid...
528
00:21:39,133 --> 00:21:42,718
(sighs) that's just not one
of those things.
529
00:21:44,004 --> 00:21:46,055
That part's over.
530
00:21:47,724 --> 00:21:50,393
(sighs)
I got to go.
531
00:21:51,478 --> 00:21:53,562
Good night, Lily.
532
00:21:54,398 --> 00:21:56,899
Good night.
533
00:22:07,994 --> 00:22:10,196
(shuddering sigh)
534
00:22:16,120 --> 00:22:17,302
LILY:
Marshall's almost here.
535
00:22:17,304 --> 00:22:19,221
Yes! Look at us,
536
00:22:19,223 --> 00:22:22,157
hanging out again.
This is amazing.
537
00:22:22,159 --> 00:22:23,625
This is awesome!
538
00:22:23,627 --> 00:22:27,629
This is... (roaring)
(laughing): Okay.
539
00:22:27,631 --> 00:22:29,815
Just settle down, buddy.
No!
540
00:22:29,817 --> 00:22:33,435
Settling down is for losers with
kids who never go out anymore.
541
00:22:33,437 --> 00:22:34,570
I am in
charge tonight,
542
00:22:34,572 --> 00:22:37,139
and the earliest
I am allowing anyone
543
00:22:37,141 --> 00:22:39,808
to go home is...
2:00 a.m.
544
00:22:39,810 --> 00:22:41,493
10:00 p.m.
9:45.
545
00:22:41,495 --> 00:22:42,694
3:00 a.m.
546
00:22:42,696 --> 00:22:45,697
Guys, tonight
is gonna be legen--
547
00:22:45,699 --> 00:22:48,450
wait for it...
548
00:22:48,452 --> 00:22:49,785
If I leave now,
549
00:22:49,787 --> 00:22:50,869
I could put
the kids to bed.
550
00:22:50,871 --> 00:22:51,870
I'll get the check.
551
00:22:51,872 --> 00:22:53,172
..dary!
552
00:22:53,174 --> 00:22:54,756
Legendary!
553
00:22:54,758 --> 00:22:56,875
Guys, the gang is back!
554
00:22:56,877 --> 00:23:00,328
We're back!
(sputtering, shouting)
555
00:23:00,330 --> 00:23:03,182
All of us except for Robin.
556
00:23:03,967 --> 00:23:05,500
We never see her anymore.
557
00:23:05,502 --> 00:23:07,186
Okay, in addition
to you guys not going home
558
00:23:07,188 --> 00:23:09,838
before 4:00 a.m.--
yes, it's up to 4:00 now--
559
00:23:09,840 --> 00:23:13,008
new rule: anytime anyone talks
about something sad,
560
00:23:13,010 --> 00:23:15,277
we stay out an extra hour.
561
00:23:15,279 --> 00:23:17,646
We said we'd always be there
for the big moments.
562
00:23:17,648 --> 00:23:19,398
5:00 a.m.
To be fair,
563
00:23:19,400 --> 00:23:20,849
tonight's just
us hanging out
564
00:23:20,851 --> 00:23:22,317
until 10:00 p.m., tops.
565
00:23:22,319 --> 00:23:23,318
It's not a big moment.
566
00:23:23,320 --> 00:23:24,319
BARNEY:
Um,
567
00:23:24,321 --> 00:23:25,871
yes, it is.
Um, no, it's not.
568
00:23:25,873 --> 00:23:29,124
Um, yes, it is.
Um... no, it's not.
569
00:23:29,126 --> 00:23:31,543
Um, yes, it is.
570
00:23:31,545 --> 00:23:33,912
I got a phone call today.
571
00:23:33,914 --> 00:23:37,649
A judge in Queens is retiring,
so...
572
00:23:37,651 --> 00:23:39,485
I'm gonna be a judge.
573
00:23:39,487 --> 00:23:40,302
(gasps)
574
00:23:40,304 --> 00:23:42,471
(shouting)
Yes! Yes!
575
00:23:42,473 --> 00:23:44,973
(laughing)
Judge Eriksen!
576
00:23:44,975 --> 00:23:47,559
Yeah!
(chuckling) One more.
577
00:23:47,561 --> 00:23:50,879
I told you the phone would
ring. You deserve this.
578
00:23:50,881 --> 00:23:52,397
Thanks, Lily.
579
00:23:52,399 --> 00:23:55,267
I love you, Marshmallow.
TED: Oh.
580
00:23:55,269 --> 00:23:56,852
1:45 a.m.
581
00:23:56,854 --> 00:23:59,354
Well, you were right, Barney,
this night was, in fact,
582
00:23:59,356 --> 00:24:01,401
legendary, but...
583
00:24:01,426 --> 00:24:02,692
I know what you're gonna say
and I agree.
584
00:24:02,693 --> 00:24:04,109
We're going to Vegas!
585
00:24:04,111 --> 00:24:05,527
TED:
I will be awakened
586
00:24:05,529 --> 00:24:09,698
by screaming children
in less than...
587
00:24:09,700 --> 00:24:12,284
(crying):
four-and-a-half hours.
588
00:24:12,286 --> 00:24:13,418
BARNEY:
You're staying.
589
00:24:13,420 --> 00:24:14,402
I'm going.
590
00:24:14,404 --> 00:24:15,754
Judge Fudge,
your very first ruling?
591
00:24:15,756 --> 00:24:17,172
(deep voice):
He stays.
592
00:24:17,174 --> 00:24:18,540
Hey! See?
593
00:24:18,542 --> 00:24:20,092
Tonight is about
594
00:24:20,094 --> 00:24:23,378
celebrating our enduring bond
as friends.
595
00:24:23,380 --> 00:24:26,414
Nay, family. Because
that's what we are, Ted.
596
00:24:26,416 --> 00:24:27,633
We are fa...
597
00:24:27,635 --> 00:24:29,017
Okay, fun night,
guys. Keep in touch.
598
00:24:29,019 --> 00:24:30,585
Damn it, Barney.
(choking)
599
00:24:30,587 --> 00:24:33,438
(strained):
Crushing... windpipe.
600
00:24:33,440 --> 00:24:35,691
You're lucky that's
the only pipe I'm crushing.
601
00:24:35,693 --> 00:24:38,093
Aah!
That woman is half your age.
602
00:24:38,095 --> 00:24:40,262
Haven't you changed,
even a little?
603
00:24:40,264 --> 00:24:42,364
No. I haven't.
604
00:24:43,149 --> 00:24:45,067
Look, I know
there was a time
605
00:24:45,069 --> 00:24:47,202
when it seemed like I was
capable of going the distance,
606
00:24:47,204 --> 00:24:51,206
but... if it wasn't gonna
happen with Robin,
607
00:24:51,208 --> 00:24:53,709
then it's just not gonna
happen with anyone.
608
00:24:53,711 --> 00:24:54,943
I am never
609
00:24:54,945 --> 00:24:56,828
gonna be a guy
who meets a girl
610
00:24:56,830 --> 00:24:59,131
and, from the first time
I see her, I'm just like,
611
00:24:59,133 --> 00:25:01,833
"You are the
love of my life.
612
00:25:01,835 --> 00:25:03,285
"Everything
I have
613
00:25:03,287 --> 00:25:07,089
and everything I am
is yours forever."
614
00:25:07,091 --> 00:25:08,312
Really?
615
00:25:08,337 --> 00:25:10,416
No, I'm just making a point.
Move it along.
616
00:25:11,294 --> 00:25:13,562
That's not me.
617
00:25:13,564 --> 00:25:15,630
I'm the guy
who straightens his tie,
618
00:25:15,632 --> 00:25:17,349
says something dirty,
high-fives himself
619
00:25:17,351 --> 00:25:19,651
and then goes and talks
to that girl over there.
620
00:25:20,687 --> 00:25:22,337
That's me.
621
00:25:22,339 --> 00:25:26,241
Can I please... just be me?
622
00:25:27,977 --> 00:25:30,112
Judge Fudge?
623
00:25:31,981 --> 00:25:34,333
I'll allow it.
624
00:25:34,335 --> 00:25:37,953
Then I'll a-plow it. Self-five.
625
00:25:37,955 --> 00:25:40,706
Stinson out.
626
00:25:40,708 --> 00:25:43,175
(rock music playing)
627
00:25:43,177 --> 00:25:46,044
(cheering)
Oh!
628
00:25:46,046 --> 00:25:47,846
(whoops) MARSHALL:
Hey, so are you guys
629
00:25:47,848 --> 00:25:49,514
ever gonna tie the knot
or are you...
630
00:25:49,516 --> 00:25:51,683
are you just comfortable
living in sin?
631
00:25:51,685 --> 00:25:52,884
Someone's gotten a bit...
632
00:25:52,886 --> 00:25:54,502
judge-y.
Oh!
633
00:25:54,504 --> 00:25:56,688
Sustained.
THE MOTHER: Yeah.
634
00:25:56,690 --> 00:25:58,523
We'll get around to it.
It's just, you know,
635
00:25:58,525 --> 00:26:00,859
with life and
jobs and kids.
636
00:26:00,861 --> 00:26:02,677
Plus, this one's still
insisting on getting married
637
00:26:02,679 --> 00:26:03,862
in a French castle.
638
00:26:03,864 --> 00:26:06,982
I'd get married tomorrow
in a White Castle,
639
00:26:06,984 --> 00:26:09,851
but this guy needs
more "wow factor."
640
00:26:09,853 --> 00:26:12,154
You're all the wow factor
I need.
641
00:26:12,156 --> 00:26:13,538
BARNEY:
Aw!
642
00:26:13,540 --> 00:26:15,991
(mimics retching)
643
00:26:15,993 --> 00:26:18,486
Glad someone can be happy
on the day of a tragedy.
644
00:26:18,487 --> 00:26:18,957
LILY: Aw, Barney,
645
00:26:18,962 --> 00:26:20,996
you know this is
all fake, right?
646
00:26:20,998 --> 00:26:22,748
That robot's
not really dead.
647
00:26:22,750 --> 00:26:24,082
(laughter)
I'm not
648
00:26:24,084 --> 00:26:27,135
talking about the robot, Lily.
Everyone,
649
00:26:27,137 --> 00:26:30,872
stop having fun! I'm about
to tell a sad story!
650
00:26:30,874 --> 00:26:35,043
Guys, remember back in 2010
when I achieved a perfect week?
651
00:26:35,045 --> 00:26:37,045
Seven girls in
seven nights, sure.
652
00:26:37,047 --> 00:26:38,480
BARNEY:
Well, recently,
653
00:26:38,482 --> 00:26:40,265
I decided to attempt...
654
00:26:40,267 --> 00:26:42,334
a perfect month.
655
00:26:42,336 --> 00:26:45,270
I put togethera brand-new playbook.
656
00:26:45,272 --> 00:26:48,106
No, I can't hear this.
This is just too sad.
657
00:26:48,108 --> 00:26:50,192
But I haven't gotten
to the sad part yet.
658
00:26:50,194 --> 00:26:52,560
You're in your 40s and
you have a playbook.
659
00:26:52,562 --> 00:26:53,561
That's
660
00:26:53,563 --> 00:26:54,613
the sad part.
661
00:26:54,615 --> 00:26:56,782
Lily... just...
662
00:26:56,784 --> 00:26:58,500
Okay?
663
00:26:58,502 --> 00:27:01,286
So I put together
a brand-new playbook,
664
00:27:01,288 --> 00:27:04,373
filled with plays
I'd never tried before, like...
665
00:27:05,825 --> 00:27:07,709
...where,as in the '80s classic,
666
00:27:07,711 --> 00:27:12,097
I magically come to life,if you know what I mean.
667
00:27:13,533 --> 00:27:16,184
...where I wait till a girlmentions something she likes.
668
00:27:16,186 --> 00:27:17,919
God, I love nachos.
669
00:27:17,921 --> 00:27:19,971
Thank you.
670
00:27:19,973 --> 00:27:21,556
Allow me to introduce myself.
671
00:27:21,558 --> 00:27:22,774
My name is Jim,
672
00:27:22,776 --> 00:27:24,592
Jim Nacho.
673
00:27:24,594 --> 00:27:28,613
Inventor of the nacho.
674
00:27:28,615 --> 00:27:30,399
So... did you get
a perfect month?
675
00:27:30,401 --> 00:27:32,784
Yes.
676
00:27:32,786 --> 00:27:34,602
Then why are
you so upset?
677
00:27:34,604 --> 00:27:37,072
That last girl, number 31...
678
00:27:37,074 --> 00:27:40,075
Oh, that's a pretty name.
What is that, French?
679
00:27:40,077 --> 00:27:42,494
...she's pregnant.
680
00:27:46,741 --> 00:27:48,257
Wait, you're messing
with us, right?
681
00:27:48,282 --> 00:27:50,256
You didn't really
get a girl pregnant?
682
00:27:50,569 --> 00:27:52,176
It's real.
683
00:27:52,201 --> 00:27:53,592
She's pregnant.
684
00:27:55,019 --> 00:27:56,231
Kinda puts an asterisk,
685
00:27:56,256 --> 00:27:58,271
on the whole perfect
month thing, huh?
686
00:27:59,875 --> 00:28:01,826
Barney,
are you okay?
687
00:28:02,711 --> 00:28:05,046
Ah, Jim Nantz.
688
00:28:05,048 --> 00:28:07,916
Thank goodness. You're always
here for me in times of trouble.
689
00:28:07,918 --> 00:28:09,417
What should I do?
690
00:28:09,419 --> 00:28:11,285
You're on your own
this time, bro.
691
00:28:12,588 --> 00:28:14,789
Congratulations, Papa.
692
00:28:14,791 --> 00:28:17,558
Stop it. This is a disaster.
693
00:28:17,560 --> 00:28:18,509
Why?
694
00:28:18,511 --> 00:28:20,795
Why? Because I'm too old.
695
00:28:20,797 --> 00:28:22,063
I was about
696
00:28:22,065 --> 00:28:26,100
to enter my golden years,
my Clooney years,
697
00:28:26,102 --> 00:28:28,653
my daddy issues years,
698
00:28:28,655 --> 00:28:31,356
where I don't just remind
messed-up girls of their dads
699
00:28:31,358 --> 00:28:32,824
because I'm emotionally distant.
700
00:28:32,826 --> 00:28:36,261
I freaking look like
their dads. That's the dream.
701
00:28:36,263 --> 00:28:37,295
My life
702
00:28:37,297 --> 00:28:39,614
is over.
703
00:28:39,616 --> 00:28:42,750
So where are you guys
registered?
704
00:28:44,253 --> 00:28:47,588
TED: Another fun fact about theGoliath National Bank building,
705
00:28:47,590 --> 00:28:50,041
the sleek but historical facade
has been described
706
00:28:50,043 --> 00:28:53,795
by Architecture Vision Monthly
as "modern classicism."
707
00:28:53,797 --> 00:28:55,463
I can see that.
708
00:28:55,465 --> 00:28:57,632
Mm-hmm. Any questions
from the group?
709
00:28:57,634 --> 00:28:59,000
I have a
question.
710
00:28:59,002 --> 00:29:00,935
What happened to the building
that used to be here?
711
00:29:00,937 --> 00:29:02,220
It was way nicer.
712
00:29:02,222 --> 00:29:03,471
Robin!
713
00:29:03,473 --> 00:29:05,273
Oh, my God!
714
00:29:05,275 --> 00:29:07,008
What are you doing here?
715
00:29:07,010 --> 00:29:08,009
I thought you were in...
716
00:29:08,011 --> 00:29:10,561
Greece, uh, Morocco, Moscow.
717
00:29:10,563 --> 00:29:12,730
Yeah, World Wide News
keeps me pretty busy.
718
00:29:12,732 --> 00:29:14,015
And pretty famous.
719
00:29:14,017 --> 00:29:15,316
I mean, you're everywhere.
720
00:29:15,318 --> 00:29:18,019
I am not everywhere. The...
721
00:29:18,904 --> 00:29:20,621
Okay, I'm some places.
722
00:29:20,623 --> 00:29:22,907
(laughs):
Hi, Penny.
723
00:29:22,909 --> 00:29:26,127
Oh, my gosh, I haven't
seen you in forever.
724
00:29:26,129 --> 00:29:28,696
I like you, bus lady.
Oh,
725
00:29:28,698 --> 00:29:29,714
I like you, too.
726
00:29:29,716 --> 00:29:31,198
Never call me that again.
727
00:29:31,200 --> 00:29:32,000
(giggles)
728
00:29:32,002 --> 00:29:33,501
And that was it.
729
00:29:33,503 --> 00:29:35,219
Wow.
Hm.
730
00:29:35,221 --> 00:29:38,756
A genuine Scherbatsky sighting
out in nature.
731
00:29:38,758 --> 00:29:42,176
At this point, that's
like seeing Sasquatch.
732
00:29:42,178 --> 00:29:44,812
No, Sasquatch is a warm
and affectionate creature.
733
00:29:44,814 --> 00:29:46,981
At this point, Robin's
more like the yeti--
734
00:29:46,983 --> 00:29:48,516
cold and aloof.
735
00:29:49,217 --> 00:29:50,852
Hey, Ted.
736
00:29:50,854 --> 00:29:53,154
Ask me if the Abominable
Snowman called.
737
00:29:53,156 --> 00:29:54,989
Has the Abominable Snowman
called?
738
00:29:54,991 --> 00:29:56,390
Not yeti.
739
00:29:57,059 --> 00:29:58,559
Here we are again.
740
00:29:58,561 --> 00:30:02,229
Another big moment for us,
and Robin's missing it.
741
00:30:02,231 --> 00:30:03,698
MARSHALL:
I know, baby.
742
00:30:03,700 --> 00:30:06,417
I mean, the birth of her
ex-husband's love child
743
00:30:06,419 --> 00:30:09,504
is a bit of a stretch--
but I know, baby.
744
00:30:09,506 --> 00:30:11,923
(sighs)
745
00:30:11,925 --> 00:30:13,674
Well?
746
00:30:13,676 --> 00:30:15,426
It was... crazy in there,
747
00:30:15,428 --> 00:30:16,878
but...
748
00:30:16,880 --> 00:30:19,413
I threw up,
and now I feel better.
749
00:30:19,415 --> 00:30:20,548
Where were you?
750
00:30:20,550 --> 00:30:22,717
In the can.
I knew I was gonna urp,
751
00:30:22,719 --> 00:30:24,719
so I put this on over my suit.
752
00:30:24,721 --> 00:30:26,771
Number 31 won't let me
in the delivery room.
753
00:30:26,773 --> 00:30:28,589
We're gonna need a name
eventually.
754
00:30:28,591 --> 00:30:30,257
Mr. Stinson?
755
00:30:30,259 --> 00:30:32,193
Yes?
Congratulations.
756
00:30:32,195 --> 00:30:33,811
Congratulations because
757
00:30:33,813 --> 00:30:36,447
the blood test came back
and I'm not the father?!
758
00:30:36,449 --> 00:30:38,599
Happy Not a Father's Day!
759
00:30:38,601 --> 00:30:41,702
No. Congratulations.
760
00:30:41,704 --> 00:30:42,820
It's a girl.
761
00:30:42,822 --> 00:30:44,072
Would you like to meet her?
762
00:30:44,074 --> 00:30:45,573
Nah, I'm good.
763
00:30:45,575 --> 00:30:48,242
I don't...
Oh, just go meet your daughter!
764
00:30:49,111 --> 00:30:51,329
This is Ellie.
765
00:31:01,924 --> 00:31:04,425
I'll give you guys
a minute.
766
00:31:05,644 --> 00:31:08,563
♪
767
00:31:17,305 --> 00:31:21,159
You are the love
of my life.
768
00:31:23,529 --> 00:31:25,746
(trembling breath)
769
00:31:25,748 --> 00:31:29,784
Everything I have...
770
00:31:29,786 --> 00:31:32,787
and everything I am...
771
00:31:34,156 --> 00:31:37,324
...is yours.
772
00:31:37,326 --> 00:31:39,877
(gasping breath)
773
00:31:39,879 --> 00:31:42,046
Forever.
774
00:31:55,611 --> 00:31:56,811
What?
775
00:31:56,813 --> 00:31:59,147
Do I have stuff in my teeth?
776
00:31:59,149 --> 00:32:00,448
Give me your
engagement ring back.
777
00:32:00,450 --> 00:32:02,683
Just because I have
stuff in my teeth?
778
00:32:02,685 --> 00:32:04,351
We-we can work through this.
779
00:32:04,353 --> 00:32:05,703
(laughs):
Just give it back.
780
00:32:07,739 --> 00:32:09,740
(clears throat)
781
00:32:14,529 --> 00:32:18,532
If you don't get married in that
time, you have to re-propose.
782
00:32:18,534 --> 00:32:20,001
Will you...
783
00:32:20,003 --> 00:32:21,552
Yes. Yes, you silly man.
784
00:32:21,554 --> 00:32:22,753
Let me finish.
785
00:32:22,755 --> 00:32:23,821
Will you...
786
00:32:23,823 --> 00:32:25,039
Yes! Sorry.
787
00:32:25,557 --> 00:32:26,340
Yes.
788
00:32:26,342 --> 00:32:28,342
Will y...
789
00:32:28,344 --> 00:32:30,061
Will you marry me...
790
00:32:30,063 --> 00:32:31,729
on Thursday?
791
00:32:31,731 --> 00:32:34,882
I called your office--
you got nothing on Thursday.
792
00:32:34,884 --> 00:32:36,567
Will you marry me on Thursday?
793
00:32:36,569 --> 00:32:37,568
Yes.
794
00:32:37,570 --> 00:32:39,270
(laughs)
795
00:32:44,943 --> 00:32:45,993
(groans)
796
00:32:45,995 --> 00:32:47,394
Same ring.
797
00:32:47,396 --> 00:32:49,447
(laughs)
798
00:32:49,449 --> 00:32:51,582
LILY:
I can't believe it.
799
00:32:51,584 --> 00:32:53,901
It's Ted Mosby's wedding day!
800
00:32:53,903 --> 00:32:56,737
Yes! After only seven
years and two kids.
801
00:32:56,739 --> 00:32:58,372
Guys, am I rushing
into this?
802
00:32:58,374 --> 00:32:59,590
Whoa.
803
00:32:59,592 --> 00:33:01,375
Oh, buddy, are you okay?
804
00:33:01,377 --> 00:33:03,761
So tired.
805
00:33:03,763 --> 00:33:05,913
Baby no sleepy.
806
00:33:05,915 --> 00:33:07,848
Barney dying.
807
00:33:07,850 --> 00:33:10,551
Well, we're staying out till
3:00 a.m. tonight.
808
00:33:10,553 --> 00:33:13,070
9:45!
809
00:33:13,072 --> 00:33:16,023
Seriously, though,
I am so proud of you.
810
00:33:16,025 --> 00:33:17,058
Not that
you're a dad.
811
00:33:17,060 --> 00:33:18,559
It's like
you're a totally
812
00:33:18,561 --> 00:33:19,977
different pers...
Whoa!
813
00:33:19,979 --> 00:33:22,230
And... we're back.
814
00:33:23,916 --> 00:33:25,700
Hey.
815
00:33:25,702 --> 00:33:28,069
Hi.
What to join us for shots?
816
00:33:28,071 --> 00:33:29,487
(chuckles):
Shots?
817
00:33:29,489 --> 00:33:31,822
Before lunch on a Thursday?
818
00:33:31,824 --> 00:33:34,792
It's like you're trying
to make bad decisions.
819
00:33:34,794 --> 00:33:36,961
You young ladies
need to go home,
820
00:33:36,963 --> 00:33:38,612
put on some
decent clothes
821
00:33:38,614 --> 00:33:41,799
and take a good hard look
at your lives. Get!
822
00:33:42,634 --> 00:33:44,218
Call your parents--
823
00:33:44,220 --> 00:33:45,886
they're probably worried sick.
824
00:33:46,471 --> 00:33:48,923
I have officially
825
00:33:48,925 --> 00:33:51,259
seen everything.
826
00:33:53,345 --> 00:33:55,730
Not everything.
827
00:34:02,836 --> 00:34:05,287
Hi.
Hi.
828
00:34:08,992 --> 00:34:12,478
I-I know I've...
missed a couple lately, but...
829
00:34:12,480 --> 00:34:16,465
we said we'd always be there
for the big moments.
830
00:34:18,351 --> 00:34:20,152
Aw, crap.
831
00:34:20,154 --> 00:34:21,270
Mascara running.
832
00:34:21,272 --> 00:34:23,939
Nobody let her
out of your sight.
833
00:34:26,777 --> 00:34:28,861
Hi, Daddy.
Whoa.
834
00:34:28,863 --> 00:34:30,512
Look, Robin,
I'm really happy to see you,
835
00:34:30,514 --> 00:34:32,364
but I don't think of you
that way anymore.
836
00:34:32,366 --> 00:34:34,183
, dummy,
you had a kid.
837
00:34:34,185 --> 00:34:35,851
Congrats.
Right, yeah.
838
00:34:35,853 --> 00:34:37,620
Thanks. A kid.
839
00:34:37,622 --> 00:34:39,121
I'm tired.
840
00:34:39,123 --> 00:34:40,790
Oh.
But, uh,
841
00:34:40,792 --> 00:34:42,491
she's awesome.
Yeah?
842
00:34:42,493 --> 00:34:43,793
Yeah.
843
00:34:43,795 --> 00:34:45,861
Daddy's home.
844
00:34:48,365 --> 00:34:49,715
Mm.
845
00:34:49,717 --> 00:34:52,534
Judge Fudge? Hey?
(laughs) Hey...
846
00:34:52,536 --> 00:34:54,203
Actually, um, little
announcement for everybody.
847
00:34:54,205 --> 00:34:56,371
I'm gonna be running
for State Supreme Court.
848
00:34:56,373 --> 00:34:58,257
Yeah. So if
everything goes well,
849
00:34:58,259 --> 00:35:00,176
in a couple of months,
you won't be calling me
850
00:35:00,178 --> 00:35:01,894
Judge Fudge anymore.
851
00:35:01,896 --> 00:35:04,096
You'll be calling me
Fudge Supreme.
852
00:35:04,098 --> 00:35:06,548
(others chuckling)
853
00:35:08,518 --> 00:35:10,286
The man of the hour.
854
00:35:10,288 --> 00:35:11,553
Yeah.
855
00:35:11,555 --> 00:35:13,072
You RSVP'd no.
856
00:35:13,074 --> 00:35:14,657
I did.
857
00:35:14,659 --> 00:35:19,394
But someone pretty persuasive
talked me into it.
858
00:35:20,163 --> 00:35:22,731
♪
859
00:35:24,567 --> 00:35:26,452
Sorry. I know
it's bad luck
860
00:35:26,454 --> 00:35:28,671
to see the bride
in her dress.
861
00:35:29,589 --> 00:35:31,373
Worth it.
862
00:35:33,627 --> 00:35:36,212
But I couldn't miss this.
863
00:35:36,214 --> 00:35:37,546
I want to get
a picture.
864
00:35:37,548 --> 00:35:39,932
Get in! I want to take
a picture of you guys.
865
00:35:39,934 --> 00:35:41,767
Come on, get together.
866
00:35:41,769 --> 00:35:43,085
Are you ready?
867
00:35:43,087 --> 00:35:45,271
All right, get in.
All right. All right.
868
00:35:45,273 --> 00:35:47,022
One, two,
869
00:35:47,024 --> 00:35:48,574
three.
870
00:35:48,576 --> 00:35:49,608
(shutter clicks)
871
00:35:49,610 --> 00:35:52,394
♪
872
00:35:56,283 --> 00:35:57,867
Hey. Hey, you kids.
873
00:35:57,869 --> 00:36:00,703
Yeah, you didn't sound
a thousand there.
874
00:36:02,739 --> 00:36:05,124
Do you have any idea
what happened right here
875
00:36:05,126 --> 00:36:06,625
in this very bar?
876
00:36:06,627 --> 00:36:08,410
No. What happened?
877
00:36:08,412 --> 00:36:09,920
(chuckles)
878
00:36:09,921 --> 00:36:11,837
Just...
879
00:36:13,924 --> 00:36:17,009
...just all kinds of stuff.
880
00:36:19,513 --> 00:36:20,463
A toast.
881
00:36:20,465 --> 00:36:21,964
Mm-hmm.
882
00:36:21,966 --> 00:36:23,332
Okay, first off...
883
00:36:23,334 --> 00:36:25,434
to everyone at
this table...
884
00:36:26,186 --> 00:36:28,271
...I love you
guys so much,
885
00:36:28,273 --> 00:36:29,472
I can't even...
886
00:36:29,474 --> 00:36:31,357
Just move to the second part.
Okay, okay.
887
00:36:31,359 --> 00:36:33,342
Secondly, to Ted...
888
00:36:33,344 --> 00:36:34,143
Don't say it.
889
00:36:34,145 --> 00:36:36,228
OTHERS:
...Evelyn Mosby.
890
00:36:36,230 --> 00:36:37,947
Thank you for that.
891
00:36:37,949 --> 00:36:39,815
A man with...
892
00:36:39,817 --> 00:36:42,285
more emotional endurance
893
00:36:42,287 --> 00:36:44,704
than anyone I know.
894
00:36:44,706 --> 00:36:45,854
It was a long,
895
00:36:45,856 --> 00:36:48,124
difficult road.
896
00:36:48,126 --> 00:36:50,826
Thank God we
finally got here.
897
00:36:50,828 --> 00:36:51,794
Hear, hear.
898
00:36:51,796 --> 00:36:53,045
OTHERS:
Hear, hear.
899
00:36:53,047 --> 00:36:54,580
NARRATOR:
Aunt Lily wasn't wrong.
900
00:36:54,582 --> 00:36:57,883
It was at timesa long, difficult road.
901
00:36:57,885 --> 00:36:59,969
But I'm glad it waslong and difficult,
902
00:36:59,971 --> 00:37:03,306
because if I hadn't gonethrough hell to get there,
903
00:37:03,308 --> 00:37:04,974
the lesson mightnot have been as clear.
904
00:37:04,976 --> 00:37:07,893
You see, kids,right from the moment
905
00:37:07,895 --> 00:37:09,829
I met your mom, I knew...
906
00:37:09,831 --> 00:37:12,565
I have to love this womanas much as I can
907
00:37:12,567 --> 00:37:15,935
for as long as I can, andI can never stop loving her,
908
00:37:15,937 --> 00:37:17,570
not even for a second.
909
00:37:17,572 --> 00:37:20,990
I carried that lesson with methrough every
910
00:37:20,992 --> 00:37:23,275
stupid fight we ever had,
911
00:37:23,277 --> 00:37:26,028
every 5:00 a.m.Christmas morning,
912
00:37:26,030 --> 00:37:28,681
every sleepy Sunday afternoon,
913
00:37:28,683 --> 00:37:29,949
through every speed bump.
914
00:37:29,951 --> 00:37:31,250
Every pang of jealousy
915
00:37:31,252 --> 00:37:34,704
or boredom or uncertaintythat came our way,
916
00:37:34,706 --> 00:37:37,256
I carried that lesson with me.
917
00:37:37,258 --> 00:37:39,925
And I carried it with mewhen she got sick.
918
00:37:39,927 --> 00:37:44,347
Even then, in what can onlybe called the worst of times,
919
00:37:44,349 --> 00:37:47,116
all I could do was thank God,
920
00:37:47,118 --> 00:37:51,804
thank every god there is,or ever was, or will be,
921
00:37:51,806 --> 00:37:53,305
and the whole universe,
922
00:37:53,307 --> 00:37:56,726
and anyone elseI can possibly thank...
923
00:37:56,728 --> 00:37:58,611
♪ Will I see you tonight?
924
00:37:58,613 --> 00:38:01,397
...that I sawthat beautiful girl
925
00:38:01,399 --> 00:38:03,616
on that train platform,
926
00:38:03,618 --> 00:38:06,402
and that I had the gutsto stand up,
927
00:38:06,404 --> 00:38:10,322
walk over to her,tap her on the shoulder,
928
00:38:10,324 --> 00:38:12,241
open my mouth,
929
00:38:12,243 --> 00:38:14,410
and speak.
930
00:38:14,412 --> 00:38:16,245
Excuse me. Hi.
Hi.
931
00:38:16,247 --> 00:38:17,997
I'm the...
The best man. Yeah. Get in here,
932
00:38:17,999 --> 00:38:20,166
get in here, get in here.
Oh, thanks. Here, let me.
933
00:38:20,168 --> 00:38:21,550
Oh, okay. Thank you.
934
00:38:21,552 --> 00:38:24,086
Great show tonight. Yeah.
Oh, thank you.
935
00:38:24,088 --> 00:38:26,055
You're Cindy's
ex-roommate, right?
936
00:38:26,057 --> 00:38:28,457
Yeah. And you are the professor.
937
00:38:28,459 --> 00:38:31,060
I took one of your classes.
938
00:38:31,062 --> 00:38:32,961
Really? Which one?
Mm-hmm.
939
00:38:32,963 --> 00:38:34,230
Econ 305.
940
00:38:34,232 --> 00:38:36,432
Econ 305.
I don't teach...
941
00:38:36,434 --> 00:38:37,633
Oh, no.
942
00:38:37,635 --> 00:38:39,018
Oh, yeah.
943
00:38:39,020 --> 00:38:41,153
Excuse me, I'm gonna jump
onto the tracks now. - No.
944
00:38:41,155 --> 00:38:43,856
No, no, no, don't.
You were great, you were great.
945
00:38:43,858 --> 00:38:45,524
Wait a second.
946
00:38:45,526 --> 00:38:47,493
This is my umbrella.
947
00:38:47,495 --> 00:38:51,480
I left this umbrella at Cindy's--
you totally stole my umbrella.
948
00:38:51,482 --> 00:38:52,815
(laughs):
What? No, I didn't.
949
00:38:52,817 --> 00:38:55,167
This is my umbrella.
I bought this.
950
00:38:55,169 --> 00:38:57,703
Excuse me. It even
has my initials
951
00:38:57,705 --> 00:38:59,488
on it right here: T.M.
952
00:38:59,490 --> 00:39:00,756
Ted Mosby.
953
00:39:00,758 --> 00:39:02,825
Yeah. Look again,
Ted Mosby.
954
00:39:02,827 --> 00:39:05,211
Those are my
initials: T.M.
955
00:39:05,213 --> 00:39:08,264
Tracy McConnell.
Um, no, Tracy McConnell,
956
00:39:08,266 --> 00:39:10,999
it's T.M.--
Totally My umbrella.
957
00:39:11,001 --> 00:39:13,352
Uh, your T.M.--
Terribly Mistaken,
958
00:39:13,354 --> 00:39:16,722
because this umbrella has
always belonged T.M.:
959
00:39:16,724 --> 00:39:18,941
To Me.
960
00:39:18,943 --> 00:39:20,309
(laughs)
961
00:39:20,311 --> 00:39:24,230
Although... I did lose it
for a few years there.
962
00:39:24,232 --> 00:39:27,116
Um... so, I went to
this dance club...
963
00:39:27,118 --> 00:39:28,367
On St. Patrick's Day.
964
00:39:28,369 --> 00:39:31,487
...on St. Patrick's Day.
965
00:39:31,489 --> 00:39:33,038
And you left it there.
966
00:39:33,040 --> 00:39:35,040
And I left it there.
967
00:39:35,042 --> 00:39:37,860
And you never thought
you'd see it again.
968
00:39:37,862 --> 00:39:40,496
And I never thought
I'd see it again.
969
00:39:44,050 --> 00:39:46,635
Funny how sometimes you just...
970
00:39:46,637 --> 00:39:48,220
find things.
971
00:39:48,222 --> 00:39:52,892
♪ Will I see you tonight?
972
00:39:52,894 --> 00:39:54,310
Hi.
973
00:39:54,312 --> 00:39:55,427
(laughs):
Hi.
974
00:39:55,429 --> 00:39:58,380
♪
975
00:39:58,382 --> 00:40:00,316
♪ Every night
976
00:40:00,318 --> 00:40:02,518
♪ It's just the same ♪
977
00:40:04,488 --> 00:40:08,958
♪ All upon a downtown train.
978
00:40:10,243 --> 00:40:11,994
And that, kids...
979
00:40:11,996 --> 00:40:14,780
is how I met your mother.
980
00:40:14,782 --> 00:40:16,765
That's it?
981
00:40:16,767 --> 00:40:18,784
That's it.
982
00:40:18,786 --> 00:40:20,719
No. I don't buy it.
983
00:40:20,721 --> 00:40:23,389
That is not the reason
you made us listen to this.
984
00:40:23,391 --> 00:40:24,857
Oh, really?
985
00:40:24,859 --> 00:40:27,159
Then what's the reason?
986
00:40:27,161 --> 00:40:28,744
Let's look at
the facts here.
987
00:40:28,746 --> 00:40:30,330
You made us sit down
and listen to this story
988
00:40:30,355 --> 00:40:32,332
about how you met mom.
989
00:40:32,333 --> 00:40:35,467
Yet mom's hardly
in the story. No.
990
00:40:35,469 --> 00:40:37,269
This is a story
about how
991
00:40:37,271 --> 00:40:38,821
you're totally in love
with Aunt Robin.
992
00:40:38,823 --> 00:40:40,389
And you're thinking
about asking her out,
993
00:40:40,391 --> 00:40:42,591
and you want to know
if we're okay with it.
994
00:40:42,593 --> 00:40:43,926
I can't believe this.
995
00:40:43,928 --> 00:40:47,696
I kept this story short
and to the point,
996
00:40:47,698 --> 00:40:49,598
and you guys still missed it.
997
00:40:49,600 --> 00:40:51,934
The point of the story
is that...
998
00:40:51,936 --> 00:40:54,937
Is that you totally, totally, totally
have the hots for Aunt Robin.
999
00:40:54,939 --> 00:40:55,621
No, I don't.
1000
00:40:55,623 --> 00:40:57,156
Yes, you do.
1001
00:40:57,158 --> 00:40:58,574
You're grounded.
1002
00:40:58,576 --> 00:40:59,992
Wow, you are really
into Aunt Robin.
1003
00:40:59,994 --> 00:41:01,076
You're grounded, too.
1004
00:41:02,495 --> 00:41:06,465
Okay, suppose I were interested
in Aunt Robin in that way--
1005
00:41:06,467 --> 00:41:08,551
it's not like
I'd do anything about it.
1006
00:41:08,553 --> 00:41:10,786
I got you guys to think about.
My gosh,
1007
00:41:10,788 --> 00:41:12,087
we love Aunt Robin.
1008
00:41:12,089 --> 00:41:14,056
Whenever she comes over
for dinner, you guys
1009
00:41:14,058 --> 00:41:15,975
are so obvious.
1010
00:41:15,977 --> 00:41:17,076
Come on, Dad.
1011
00:41:17,078 --> 00:41:19,862
Mom's been gone
for six years now.
1012
00:41:19,864 --> 00:41:21,680
It's time.
1013
00:41:22,983 --> 00:41:25,818
What, I just...
just call her up on the phone
1014
00:41:25,820 --> 00:41:28,103
and ask her out on a date?
1015
00:41:28,105 --> 00:41:29,405
Yes.
Yes.
1016
00:41:29,407 --> 00:41:31,156
And that... that's something
1017
00:41:31,158 --> 00:41:32,358
you guys would want?
1018
00:41:32,360 --> 00:41:33,826
Yes!
Yes!
1019
00:41:39,182 --> 00:41:41,483
All right, I'll give her a call.
1020
00:41:41,485 --> 00:41:43,068
Do it.
I am.
1021
00:41:43,070 --> 00:41:44,987
Call her.
I'm calling her.
1022
00:41:44,989 --> 00:41:46,005
Great.
1023
00:41:46,007 --> 00:41:48,323
Here I go.
1024
00:41:51,127 --> 00:41:52,945
Or...
1025
00:41:52,947 --> 00:41:55,514
♪
1026
00:41:56,349 --> 00:41:58,634
All right, home sweet home.
1027
00:41:58,636 --> 00:42:01,387
Oh. Wait one second.
1028
00:42:01,389 --> 00:42:02,855
Okay.
1029
00:42:02,857 --> 00:42:05,691
Stay.
1030
00:42:05,693 --> 00:42:07,009
(sighs):
We'll work on that.
1031
00:42:07,011 --> 00:42:08,727
(intercom chimes)
1032
00:42:08,729 --> 00:42:11,697
Television, display
front door security.
1033
00:42:11,699 --> 00:42:13,732
(sighs)
Television, dis...
1034
00:42:13,734 --> 00:42:14,850
Oh, for Pete's sakes.
1035
00:42:14,852 --> 00:42:17,019
♪ May come and go
1036
00:42:17,021 --> 00:42:20,355
♪ Our crooked dreams
1037
00:42:20,357 --> 00:42:23,375
♪ Will always flow
1038
00:42:23,377 --> 00:42:24,410
♪ Remember
1039
00:42:24,412 --> 00:42:26,912
♪ Remem...
1040
00:42:26,914 --> 00:42:29,581
♪ Ber
1041
00:42:29,583 --> 00:42:32,584
♪ All we fight for
1042
00:42:35,805 --> 00:42:37,039
♪ Remember
1043
00:42:37,041 --> 00:42:39,475
♪ Remem...
1044
00:42:39,477 --> 00:42:41,844
♪ Ber
1045
00:42:41,846 --> 00:42:45,764
♪ All we fight for
1046
00:42:47,917 --> 00:42:49,435
♪ Remember
1047
00:42:49,437 --> 00:42:51,437
♪ Remem...
1048
00:42:51,439 --> 00:42:53,272
♪ Ber
1049
00:42:53,274 --> 00:42:57,359
♪ All we fight for
1050
00:42:58,161 --> 00:42:59,611
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh...
1051
00:42:59,613 --> 00:43:04,613
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man
71960
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