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1
00:00:07,108 --> 00:00:08,642
- Hi, I'm Patrick Star!
2
00:00:08,709 --> 00:00:12,280
And I live with my parents! Ow!
3
00:00:12,346 --> 00:00:15,049
This is my dad.
4
00:00:15,116 --> 00:00:16,584
- [slurping]
5
00:00:16,650 --> 00:00:18,319
- This is my mom!
6
00:00:18,386 --> 00:00:19,753
[giggles]
7
00:00:19,820 --> 00:00:22,423
This is my sister! She's shy.
8
00:00:22,490 --> 00:00:25,126
This is my grandpa.
9
00:00:25,193 --> 00:00:27,361
This is my room!
10
00:00:27,428 --> 00:00:30,964
And this...
11
00:00:31,031 --> 00:00:33,967
this is my show!
12
00:00:34,034 --> 00:00:35,869
[upbeat music]
13
00:00:37,305 --> 00:00:38,706
[cheery music]
14
00:00:38,772 --> 00:00:42,343
- [barking]
- [screaming]
15
00:00:42,410 --> 00:00:45,246
- [snoring]
16
00:00:45,313 --> 00:00:48,249
[big band music]
17
00:00:48,316 --> 00:00:51,719
* *
18
00:00:51,785 --> 00:00:54,288
[clock buzzing]
- [screams]
19
00:00:54,355 --> 00:00:55,923
- [yelps]
20
00:00:55,989 --> 00:00:57,925
[screams]
21
00:00:58,826 --> 00:01:00,828
[groans]
- [muttering]
22
00:01:00,894 --> 00:01:02,630
- The best way out of bed
23
00:01:02,696 --> 00:01:04,932
is an urchin on your head.
24
00:01:06,367 --> 00:01:08,169
[jaunty tune]
25
00:01:08,236 --> 00:01:09,537
Oh!
26
00:01:09,603 --> 00:01:11,772
Well, who's the best pet urchin
27
00:01:11,839 --> 00:01:13,407
in the whole world?
28
00:01:13,474 --> 00:01:15,042
You are, Ouchie.
29
00:01:15,143 --> 00:01:17,845
Give us a kiss. [kisses]
30
00:01:17,911 --> 00:01:19,247
Ouch.
31
00:01:19,313 --> 00:01:21,649
Love hurts.
[woman screaming]
32
00:01:21,715 --> 00:01:24,152
Well, off you go, little man.
33
00:01:24,218 --> 00:01:26,187
Mm. [giggles]
34
00:01:26,854 --> 00:01:31,292
Of course, you have to remember
to brush every morning.
35
00:01:31,359 --> 00:01:32,993
[grinding]
36
00:01:33,060 --> 00:01:37,265
[humming]
37
00:01:37,331 --> 00:01:39,733
Keepin' my eyes minty fresh.
38
00:01:39,800 --> 00:01:42,069
[hawks and spits]
39
00:01:42,170 --> 00:01:44,238
Hm? Hm.
40
00:01:44,305 --> 00:01:46,240
[whistles]
41
00:01:46,307 --> 00:01:49,210
- [munches, burps]
42
00:01:49,277 --> 00:01:51,212
- [chuckles] Gross.
43
00:01:51,279 --> 00:01:53,314
[blows raspberry]
- Uh-oh.
44
00:01:53,381 --> 00:01:56,384
It's almost time for my show.
45
00:01:56,450 --> 00:01:58,352
I better get Squidina.
46
00:01:58,419 --> 00:01:59,387
[axe rings]
47
00:01:59,453 --> 00:02:01,189
- [growls]
48
00:02:01,222 --> 00:02:02,356
[shouts]
49
00:02:02,423 --> 00:02:04,892
- Oops, wrong door.
50
00:02:04,958 --> 00:02:09,297
Now, where was that door? Hmm.
51
00:02:09,363 --> 00:02:10,564
There it is!
52
00:02:10,631 --> 00:02:12,200
- Where are you going?
53
00:02:12,200 --> 00:02:13,401
Show is this way!
54
00:02:13,467 --> 00:02:14,768
- [groans]
55
00:02:14,835 --> 00:02:17,871
- Knock 'em dead, bro.
56
00:02:17,938 --> 00:02:20,608
And now,
it's "The Patrick Show"
57
00:02:20,674 --> 00:02:23,877
with your host, Patrick Star!
58
00:02:27,215 --> 00:02:30,284
- [cheering]
59
00:02:31,785 --> 00:02:33,521
- * Oh *
60
00:02:33,587 --> 00:02:36,890
[grunts]
61
00:02:36,957 --> 00:02:39,593
* I can do anything *
62
00:02:39,660 --> 00:02:40,961
* 'Cause I know nothing *
63
00:02:41,028 --> 00:02:43,531
* Lack of experience
never stopped me *
64
00:02:43,597 --> 00:02:46,234
* I've got a TV show
though I'm just bluffing *
65
00:02:46,267 --> 00:02:48,569
* Make believe you're watching
and I know you'll agree *
66
00:02:48,636 --> 00:02:50,003
- [vocalizing]
67
00:02:50,070 --> 00:02:51,572
Huh?
68
00:02:51,639 --> 00:02:53,274
[shudders]
69
00:02:53,341 --> 00:02:56,143
- * "The Patrick Show"
is on my imagination *
70
00:02:56,244 --> 00:02:58,946
* Because my head is empty,
I can fill it with cheese *
71
00:02:59,012 --> 00:03:01,482
* Ice cream with syrup
and marbles and bluebirds *
72
00:03:01,549 --> 00:03:02,816
* There's one thing
I can't find *
73
00:03:02,883 --> 00:03:05,353
* And that is my keys *
74
00:03:05,419 --> 00:03:08,889
- Hey, Patrick, what's today's
show gonna be about?
75
00:03:08,956 --> 00:03:10,424
- [stomach rumbles]
76
00:03:10,491 --> 00:03:12,660
I don't know. I'm hungry.
77
00:03:12,726 --> 00:03:16,664
- We'll be right back with
Patrick Star and "I'm hungry,"
78
00:03:16,730 --> 00:03:20,268
right after these words.
79
00:03:20,268 --> 00:03:22,470
- * Chum, chum, chum *
- Chum!
80
00:03:22,536 --> 00:03:25,406
It's versatile.
You can spread it on toast.
81
00:03:25,473 --> 00:03:27,408
[chuckles, groans]
82
00:03:27,475 --> 00:03:31,412
It also keeps you warm
on frosty winter nights.
83
00:03:31,479 --> 00:03:33,614
Mm, cozy.
84
00:03:33,681 --> 00:03:35,283
The smell keeps out the cold.
85
00:03:35,316 --> 00:03:36,116
[gags]
86
00:03:36,183 --> 00:03:37,651
Here at the Chum Bucket,
87
00:03:37,718 --> 00:03:40,888
chum comes in three
delicious varieties:
88
00:03:40,954 --> 00:03:41,922
moist,
89
00:03:41,989 --> 00:03:43,357
soggy,
90
00:03:43,424 --> 00:03:44,858
and pumpkin spice.
91
00:03:44,925 --> 00:03:46,427
- * Chum Bucket *
92
00:03:46,494 --> 00:03:47,728
* Where chum is your chum *
- [stomach grumbles]
93
00:03:47,795 --> 00:03:49,630
Oh, that reminds me.
94
00:03:49,697 --> 00:03:50,964
Breakfast!
95
00:03:51,031 --> 00:03:53,033
In this family,
you gotta be fast
96
00:03:53,100 --> 00:03:55,002
or the food's all gone.
97
00:03:55,068 --> 00:03:56,470
Let's go backstage.
98
00:03:56,537 --> 00:03:58,839
[whooshing]
99
00:03:58,906 --> 00:04:00,608
- [squawking]
100
00:04:00,674 --> 00:04:03,477
- [grunts] Wrong door again?
101
00:04:03,544 --> 00:04:06,680
[grunting]
102
00:04:06,747 --> 00:04:08,916
[dizzy music]
103
00:04:08,982 --> 00:04:11,118
Hm! [humming]
104
00:04:11,184 --> 00:04:14,555
Leedle leedle leedle
leedle leed--oof!
105
00:04:14,622 --> 00:04:16,924
Morning, Mom. [kisses]
- [giggles]
106
00:04:16,990 --> 00:04:18,692
- Good morning, Dad.
107
00:04:18,759 --> 00:04:19,993
[electricity crackling]
108
00:04:20,060 --> 00:04:21,929
[both laugh]
109
00:04:21,995 --> 00:04:24,031
- Oh. Oh! Hmm.
110
00:04:24,097 --> 00:04:26,400
- Mom, Dad,
111
00:04:26,467 --> 00:04:28,168
who's this guy?
112
00:04:28,235 --> 00:04:32,072
- I have no idea.
Do you, Cecil?
113
00:04:32,139 --> 00:04:34,041
- So, you can see him, too,
Bunny?
114
00:04:34,107 --> 00:04:36,444
Huh, I thought
I was the only one.
115
00:04:36,510 --> 00:04:40,047
- I'm your grandfather,
GrandPat!
116
00:04:40,113 --> 00:04:43,150
Must we do this every morning?
117
00:04:43,216 --> 00:04:44,752
- Just play along.
118
00:04:44,818 --> 00:04:46,086
He could be dangerous.
119
00:04:46,153 --> 00:04:48,422
- Uh-huh.
- Hey, sis. Whatcha up to?
120
00:04:48,489 --> 00:04:49,590
- Well, right now,
121
00:04:49,657 --> 00:04:51,359
I'm trying to book
an imaginary ad
122
00:04:51,392 --> 00:04:53,126
for your imaginary TV show.
123
00:04:53,193 --> 00:04:54,862
- Well, how's it going?
124
00:04:54,928 --> 00:04:56,464
- They said
their imaginary people
125
00:04:56,530 --> 00:04:58,366
are gonna call
my imaginary people.
126
00:04:58,432 --> 00:04:59,700
- [laughs]
127
00:04:59,767 --> 00:05:01,535
- So, anyway.
128
00:05:01,602 --> 00:05:02,870
- [vocalizing]
129
00:05:02,936 --> 00:05:05,506
As they say in France,
130
00:05:05,573 --> 00:05:08,476
blown apple feet.
131
00:05:08,542 --> 00:05:10,578
[whimpers]
132
00:05:10,644 --> 00:05:12,179
- All done.
133
00:05:12,245 --> 00:05:15,816
[jaunty music]
134
00:05:15,883 --> 00:05:17,685
[crashing]
135
00:05:18,452 --> 00:05:21,622
- Darn, looks like
I'll be on time for work again.
136
00:05:21,689 --> 00:05:23,624
- Oh, I'm sorry, dear.
137
00:05:23,691 --> 00:05:24,825
[all grunt]
138
00:05:24,892 --> 00:05:26,827
[scooter beeps]
139
00:05:26,894 --> 00:05:29,129
[tires squeal]
140
00:05:29,196 --> 00:05:31,632
- Hey, what about my breakfast?
141
00:05:31,699 --> 00:05:35,202
I guess I'll just
have to break my own fast.
142
00:05:35,268 --> 00:05:37,971
[grunting efforts]
143
00:05:38,038 --> 00:05:39,072
Oh!
144
00:05:39,139 --> 00:05:41,875
- [grunting]
- Oh!
145
00:05:41,942 --> 00:05:43,777
[axe rings]
146
00:05:43,844 --> 00:05:45,879
I think the milk went bad.
147
00:05:45,946 --> 00:05:46,947
[indistinct muttering]
148
00:05:47,014 --> 00:05:48,716
- Ooh.
149
00:05:48,782 --> 00:05:50,418
- [muttering]
150
00:05:50,484 --> 00:05:53,687
- Hey,
it's the Dartfish family!
151
00:05:53,754 --> 00:05:55,188
- Good morning, Patrick.
152
00:05:55,255 --> 00:05:56,657
Would you like to join us
153
00:05:56,724 --> 00:05:59,627
for our sad and meager
breakfast?
154
00:05:59,693 --> 00:06:01,094
- Well, I'd--I'd--
155
00:06:01,161 --> 00:06:02,763
[all whimper]
156
00:06:02,830 --> 00:06:05,132
- Uh, no.
157
00:06:05,198 --> 00:06:06,934
I guess not.
158
00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:08,035
- All right, then.
159
00:06:08,101 --> 00:06:09,537
[all gobbling]
160
00:06:09,603 --> 00:06:10,804
[all sigh]
161
00:06:10,871 --> 00:06:13,073
Well, we gotta dart.
162
00:06:13,140 --> 00:06:14,842
[whistle blows]
163
00:06:14,908 --> 00:06:17,545
[all muttering]
164
00:06:18,245 --> 00:06:19,680
- Food!
165
00:06:19,747 --> 00:06:21,081
Here, foody-food.
166
00:06:21,148 --> 00:06:23,050
Hello?
167
00:06:23,116 --> 00:06:24,452
Food?
168
00:06:24,485 --> 00:06:27,788
[cheering]
[fireworks popping]
169
00:06:29,957 --> 00:06:33,761
Ew! Mom's gotta vacuum
under there more often.
170
00:06:36,096 --> 00:06:39,366
Food, food.
171
00:06:39,467 --> 00:06:42,002
- Hey, what are you doing
in my room?
172
00:06:42,069 --> 00:06:44,337
- Duh, looking for food.
173
00:06:44,472 --> 00:06:46,474
I'm starving.
174
00:06:46,540 --> 00:06:50,511
- Food? Ha, bah, you kids
have it easy these days.
175
00:06:50,578 --> 00:06:53,547
Back in my day, we were food.
176
00:06:53,614 --> 00:06:55,182
- Ooh.
177
00:06:55,248 --> 00:06:56,484
What flavor?
178
00:06:56,550 --> 00:06:58,118
- Hush, noodle brain.
179
00:06:58,185 --> 00:07:00,220
- Noodles.
180
00:07:00,287 --> 00:07:03,356
- It was way back
in the Patrolithic period
181
00:07:03,491 --> 00:07:05,292
of early cave stars.
182
00:07:05,358 --> 00:07:06,960
[stomachs grumbling]
183
00:07:07,027 --> 00:07:09,663
Automobiles hadn't
been invented yet.
184
00:07:09,730 --> 00:07:11,499
- [chewing]
- Ooh.
185
00:07:11,565 --> 00:07:14,134
- So there was no way
to get to a supermarket.
186
00:07:14,201 --> 00:07:15,335
- Ooh!
187
00:07:15,402 --> 00:07:16,537
- We had to do
188
00:07:16,604 --> 00:07:19,106
all our shopping in the wild.
189
00:07:19,172 --> 00:07:20,508
[both grunting]
190
00:07:20,574 --> 00:07:22,510
Where the dinosaurs
191
00:07:22,543 --> 00:07:24,311
were shopping for us.
192
00:07:24,377 --> 00:07:27,180
[both screaming]
193
00:07:27,247 --> 00:07:28,916
- Oof.
194
00:07:28,982 --> 00:07:30,050
[both groaning]
195
00:07:30,117 --> 00:07:31,284
- [growling]
196
00:07:31,351 --> 00:07:33,286
- It was just a matter of luck
197
00:07:33,353 --> 00:07:35,523
as to who would eat who.
[screaming]
198
00:07:35,523 --> 00:07:38,058
- [growling and chewing]
199
00:07:40,227 --> 00:07:41,529
[sighs]
200
00:07:41,529 --> 00:07:44,064
- I guess things
can't get any worse.
201
00:07:44,131 --> 00:07:46,366
- [smacks lips]
202
00:07:46,433 --> 00:07:48,401
[discordant clarinet tune]
203
00:07:48,536 --> 00:07:51,772
[all groaning]
204
00:07:51,839 --> 00:07:55,075
- And thus, cave stars
provided nutrition
205
00:07:55,142 --> 00:07:56,844
to the dinosaurs.
206
00:07:56,910 --> 00:07:58,011
And that's why
207
00:07:58,078 --> 00:08:00,648
dinosaurs are still
with us today.
208
00:08:00,714 --> 00:08:03,817
- [playing clarinet]
- [crunching]
209
00:08:03,884 --> 00:08:06,954
- That reminds me, I'm hungry.
210
00:08:07,020 --> 00:08:09,557
Hmm, I know!
211
00:08:09,557 --> 00:08:12,593
I'll do a cooking segment
on my show
212
00:08:12,660 --> 00:08:15,128
and I'll make myself
something to eat.
213
00:08:15,195 --> 00:08:16,396
Hup, hup!
214
00:08:16,463 --> 00:08:18,365
Hoo!
[crashing]
215
00:08:18,431 --> 00:08:20,400
Welcome back to the show.
216
00:08:20,467 --> 00:08:23,336
Now we're going
to make a casserole.
217
00:08:23,403 --> 00:08:25,238
- [cheering]
218
00:08:25,305 --> 00:08:26,574
- Well, let's see.
219
00:08:26,607 --> 00:08:29,276
We got socks, dirty sneakers,
220
00:08:29,342 --> 00:08:32,312
dried leaves, old paperbacks,
221
00:08:32,379 --> 00:08:34,147
and used napkins.
222
00:08:34,214 --> 00:08:35,415
Hmm.
223
00:08:35,482 --> 00:08:37,384
- Eh, you gotta work
with what you got.
224
00:08:37,450 --> 00:08:39,486
[cheery music]
225
00:08:39,587 --> 00:08:41,421
- [grunts]
226
00:08:41,488 --> 00:08:44,291
Cook at 1,000 degrees
for one second.
227
00:08:44,357 --> 00:08:46,026
[timer dings]
It's ready!
228
00:08:47,460 --> 00:08:49,630
[electricity crackling]
229
00:08:51,398 --> 00:08:53,901
[grunting] Okay.
[sizzling]
230
00:08:53,967 --> 00:08:56,369
Ooh.
231
00:08:56,436 --> 00:08:57,871
- [blows raspberry]
232
00:08:57,938 --> 00:08:59,973
- Time to wrap it up.
[buzzer blares]
233
00:09:00,040 --> 00:09:01,909
- The story, characters,
and names
234
00:09:01,975 --> 00:09:02,976
portrayed in this production
235
00:09:03,043 --> 00:09:04,144
are suspicious,
especially mine.
236
00:09:04,211 --> 00:09:05,445
No person associated
with this show
237
00:09:05,512 --> 00:09:06,747
received anything of value,
especially me.
238
00:09:06,814 --> 00:09:07,948
No one was harmed
in the making of this show,
239
00:09:08,015 --> 00:09:08,782
except me. Ouch.
240
00:09:08,849 --> 00:09:10,718
Thanks for watching.
241
00:09:10,784 --> 00:09:12,219
- [cheering]
- That was amazing!
242
00:09:12,285 --> 00:09:14,722
The song, the trash-erole!
243
00:09:14,788 --> 00:09:17,625
The hula number
with the cast of thousands.
244
00:09:17,658 --> 00:09:20,694
- Hi!
I don't remember that at all.
245
00:09:20,761 --> 00:09:22,730
- I don't know how you do it.
246
00:09:22,796 --> 00:09:24,698
- I don't know what I do it.
247
00:09:24,765 --> 00:09:26,934
- I bet you worked up
an appetite.
248
00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:29,002
- Ooh.
249
00:09:29,069 --> 00:09:30,403
Food!
250
00:09:30,470 --> 00:09:34,074
Aw, I missed food again.
251
00:09:34,141 --> 00:09:35,408
- [mumbling]
252
00:09:35,475 --> 00:09:38,111
Hm?
253
00:09:38,178 --> 00:09:39,279
- Hello, Patrick.
254
00:09:39,346 --> 00:09:40,748
We're just having dinner.
255
00:09:40,814 --> 00:09:43,350
One piece of crumb
for each of us.
256
00:09:43,416 --> 00:09:45,452
Here you go, Teensy Tom.
257
00:09:45,518 --> 00:09:47,655
Now you won't starve.
258
00:09:48,355 --> 00:09:50,023
- [drooling]
259
00:09:50,090 --> 00:09:52,192
- Aw, food?
260
00:09:52,259 --> 00:09:55,162
- [inhales deeply]
261
00:09:55,228 --> 00:09:57,798
Oh, nah, Teensy.
262
00:09:57,865 --> 00:09:59,700
You eat it.
- [gobbling]
263
00:09:59,767 --> 00:10:01,268
[bell dings]
264
00:10:01,334 --> 00:10:02,670
- Oh, dinner?
265
00:10:02,736 --> 00:10:04,638
[giggles] Whoa!
266
00:10:04,705 --> 00:10:06,306
- Here we are!
267
00:10:06,373 --> 00:10:08,776
It's called a trash-erole.
268
00:10:08,842 --> 00:10:11,578
I learned it from a show
I saw today.
269
00:10:11,645 --> 00:10:13,580
I think.
270
00:10:13,647 --> 00:10:16,216
- I must've cooked mine
too long.
271
00:10:16,283 --> 00:10:18,551
- Blown apple feet!
272
00:10:18,618 --> 00:10:21,354
[all gobbling]
273
00:10:21,421 --> 00:10:24,792
- [chews, slurps]
274
00:10:24,858 --> 00:10:28,395
Mm, ah, delicious, Mom.
275
00:10:28,461 --> 00:10:29,830
- Get this! I just booked
276
00:10:29,897 --> 00:10:31,498
a sponge with square pants
277
00:10:31,564 --> 00:10:33,200
who does a bubble act.
278
00:10:33,266 --> 00:10:34,567
And the best part is,
279
00:10:34,634 --> 00:10:37,705
I did it on my toy telephone.
280
00:10:37,771 --> 00:10:40,073
[phone moos]
281
00:10:40,140 --> 00:10:41,942
[laughter]
282
00:10:43,476 --> 00:10:45,378
- Goodnight, Squidina.
283
00:10:45,445 --> 00:10:47,647
- Goodnight, big brother.
284
00:10:47,715 --> 00:10:49,516
- Good night, Ouchie.
285
00:10:49,582 --> 00:10:51,051
Ouch.
286
00:10:53,320 --> 00:10:56,289
[snoring]
287
00:11:00,260 --> 00:11:02,595
- Would you just look at him,
mother.
288
00:11:02,730 --> 00:11:04,464
The little angel.
289
00:11:04,531 --> 00:11:06,867
- He sure is.
290
00:11:06,934 --> 00:11:08,736
- Uh, who is he again?
291
00:11:08,802 --> 00:11:10,838
- I have no idea.
292
00:11:10,904 --> 00:11:14,041
- [snoring]
293
00:11:17,745 --> 00:11:20,748
[axe ringing]
- [growling]
294
00:11:22,082 --> 00:11:23,316
- [sighs]
295
00:11:23,383 --> 00:11:27,755
Nothing like a relaxing morning
fishing...
296
00:11:27,755 --> 00:11:31,324
for a deadbeat.
[laughs]
297
00:11:31,391 --> 00:11:33,761
[chuckling]
298
00:11:33,827 --> 00:11:35,763
- [straining]
299
00:11:37,330 --> 00:11:39,666
- Gotcha!
You're paying for your
300
00:11:39,767 --> 00:11:43,136
newspaper subscription
today, Mr. Star.
301
00:11:43,203 --> 00:11:45,538
[straining]
302
00:11:45,605 --> 00:11:47,207
Huh? What the--
303
00:11:47,274 --> 00:11:48,341
[grumbles]
304
00:11:48,408 --> 00:11:49,676
- Would you look at that?
305
00:11:49,777 --> 00:11:51,779
I just made
six bucks in coupons
306
00:11:51,779 --> 00:11:53,680
from a magic
floating newspaper.
307
00:11:53,781 --> 00:11:54,815
- Way to go, Dad.
308
00:11:54,882 --> 00:11:56,249
- Time to get ready.
309
00:11:56,316 --> 00:11:58,852
The sea bunny runs
around the coral
310
00:11:58,919 --> 00:12:00,387
away from the barracuda
311
00:12:00,453 --> 00:12:02,890
and hops back in his hole.
312
00:12:02,956 --> 00:12:05,793
- [growls] So dapper.
313
00:12:05,859 --> 00:12:06,960
[kisses]
- [chuckles]
314
00:12:07,027 --> 00:12:09,429
- We'll be back later.
315
00:12:09,496 --> 00:12:10,530
- Wait!
316
00:12:10,597 --> 00:12:12,432
[grunts]
317
00:12:13,133 --> 00:12:16,669
"Be back" means that you left.
Where you going?
318
00:12:16,804 --> 00:12:19,506
- To our jobs, of course.
319
00:12:19,572 --> 00:12:22,409
- What is jobs?
320
00:12:22,475 --> 00:12:26,446
- Dear, I think
it's time for the talk.
321
00:12:26,513 --> 00:12:28,315
- Put down
the baseball mitt, son.
322
00:12:28,381 --> 00:12:30,250
You see, Patrick,
when an employee
323
00:12:30,317 --> 00:12:33,686
and an employer
love each other very much,
324
00:12:33,821 --> 00:12:36,056
a brand-new job is born.
325
00:12:36,123 --> 00:12:38,859
- A job gives
your life meaning.
326
00:12:38,926 --> 00:12:40,961
A purpose.
327
00:12:41,028 --> 00:12:43,864
- I want one of those
job thingies.
328
00:12:43,931 --> 00:12:47,534
- Our man-child
is becoming a man-man.
329
00:12:47,600 --> 00:12:48,601
- Oh, good.
330
00:12:48,668 --> 00:12:50,037
Maybe he can move his can-can
331
00:12:50,103 --> 00:12:51,839
out of the house-house.
332
00:12:51,872 --> 00:12:53,273
[both inhale deeply]
333
00:12:54,842 --> 00:12:58,979
[both whoop and giggle]
334
00:12:59,046 --> 00:13:00,613
- Where can I get a job
335
00:13:00,680 --> 00:13:02,916
and find my porpoise?
336
00:13:02,983 --> 00:13:05,385
- Don't look at me.
I ain't got it.
337
00:13:05,452 --> 00:13:07,354
- I already have my dream job,
338
00:13:07,420 --> 00:13:10,157
producing "The Patrick Show."
339
00:13:10,223 --> 00:13:11,859
- Oh, that show's a hoot.
340
00:13:11,925 --> 00:13:13,861
The pink guy is so dumb!
341
00:13:13,861 --> 00:13:15,328
- Come on, brother.
342
00:13:15,395 --> 00:13:18,398
It's time to start the show.
343
00:13:18,465 --> 00:13:19,967
- Yeah!
344
00:13:21,001 --> 00:13:22,903
- Let's see what's percolatin'
345
00:13:22,970 --> 00:13:25,272
on "The Patrick Show."
346
00:13:25,338 --> 00:13:28,141
- The sea bunny
runs around the coral...
347
00:13:28,208 --> 00:13:31,078
- Oh, yay. Whoo.
- Away from the barracuda
348
00:13:31,144 --> 00:13:34,681
and hops back in his hole.
349
00:13:34,747 --> 00:13:38,018
On today's show,
we're getting jobs.
350
00:13:38,085 --> 00:13:39,719
And to get a job,
351
00:13:39,786 --> 00:13:41,154
you have to know how to tie
352
00:13:41,221 --> 00:13:43,756
one of these doohickeys.
353
00:13:43,891 --> 00:13:44,892
[crashing]
354
00:13:44,925 --> 00:13:46,293
Ohh.
355
00:13:46,359 --> 00:13:49,429
[grunting and straining]
356
00:13:49,496 --> 00:13:52,165
Then the bunny and the
barracuda go out for coffee
357
00:13:52,232 --> 00:13:54,301
and their boat gets a flat.
358
00:13:54,367 --> 00:13:55,635
[grunts]
359
00:13:56,769 --> 00:13:58,738
- [gasps]
360
00:13:58,805 --> 00:14:00,340
[glass squeaking]
361
00:14:00,407 --> 00:14:01,408
- [grunts]
362
00:14:01,474 --> 00:14:04,811
- 3D effects. I love this show.
363
00:14:04,912 --> 00:14:07,214
- [straining]
364
00:14:09,182 --> 00:14:10,417
- Huh?
365
00:14:10,483 --> 00:14:12,319
- [choking]
Hi, SpongeBob.
366
00:14:12,385 --> 00:14:14,754
Fancy meeting you here.
367
00:14:14,821 --> 00:14:15,989
[strained chuckle]
368
00:14:16,056 --> 00:14:17,925
- Hi, Patrick.
Trying out a new look?
369
00:14:17,958 --> 00:14:19,459
- [inhales deeply]
370
00:14:19,526 --> 00:14:23,196
Yeah, I'm looking for a job.
371
00:14:23,263 --> 00:14:25,032
- Oh, what a coincidence.
372
00:14:25,098 --> 00:14:26,799
I could also use a job.
373
00:14:26,934 --> 00:14:28,701
Myeh, 'cause
I'm a little low on lettuce
374
00:14:28,768 --> 00:14:31,504
and I need some scratch
for spatulas, see?
375
00:14:31,571 --> 00:14:33,806
- It's not a coincidence,
SpongeBob.
376
00:14:33,941 --> 00:14:37,510
It's just two similar things
happening at the same time.
377
00:14:37,577 --> 00:14:39,412
- Oof, I guess
"The Patrick Show"
378
00:14:39,479 --> 00:14:41,514
is going mobile today.
379
00:14:41,581 --> 00:14:45,118
- Jobs! Jobs, jobs, jobs, jobs.
- Jobs, jobs? [whistling]
380
00:14:45,185 --> 00:14:47,720
- Oh, one more box.
381
00:14:47,787 --> 00:14:48,755
- That tickles.
382
00:14:48,821 --> 00:14:49,957
- I'm so sorry.
383
00:14:50,023 --> 00:14:51,591
I thought you were
a box of cereal.
384
00:14:51,658 --> 00:14:52,725
- Oh, I wish.
385
00:14:52,792 --> 00:14:55,762
- Hold on,
I'm getting a feeling.
386
00:14:55,828 --> 00:14:59,032
- [gasps]
That we should become bag boys?
387
00:14:59,099 --> 00:15:01,969
- No, it's just this darn rash.
388
00:15:02,002 --> 00:15:03,570
You gotta see this.
389
00:15:05,505 --> 00:15:07,440
- Ah, okay, here we go.
390
00:15:07,507 --> 00:15:10,043
My very first bag boy duty.
391
00:15:10,110 --> 00:15:12,079
[careful straining]
392
00:15:12,145 --> 00:15:13,780
Mm-hmm.
393
00:15:15,715 --> 00:15:17,350
Eh, eh!
394
00:15:17,417 --> 00:15:18,818
- You're going too slow,
SpongeBob.
395
00:15:18,885 --> 00:15:21,288
Bagging is all about
speed, baby!
396
00:15:21,354 --> 00:15:24,257
[grunting hurriedly]
397
00:15:24,324 --> 00:15:26,359
- Whoa.
- Oh, no, I missed one.
398
00:15:26,426 --> 00:15:27,995
[straining]
399
00:15:28,028 --> 00:15:29,729
[crashing]
- [screams]
400
00:15:29,796 --> 00:15:32,365
- Nice job, Patrick.
Now watch me.
401
00:15:32,432 --> 00:15:34,834
[grunting hurriedly]
402
00:15:34,901 --> 00:15:36,469
[slamming]
403
00:15:36,536 --> 00:15:37,304
Eh.
404
00:15:37,370 --> 00:15:39,006
[slamming]
405
00:15:39,072 --> 00:15:40,240
Ka-pow! There.
406
00:15:40,307 --> 00:15:42,842
[humming]
407
00:15:44,444 --> 00:15:46,746
Ooh, tr๏ฟฝs chic.
408
00:15:46,813 --> 00:15:48,148
- Thanks.
409
00:15:48,215 --> 00:15:50,183
- Hup-hup-hup.
410
00:15:50,250 --> 00:15:53,253
[customers screaming]
411
00:15:53,320 --> 00:15:55,222
- [struggling]
412
00:15:55,288 --> 00:15:57,390
- What is going on out here?
413
00:15:57,457 --> 00:15:59,859
[splatters]
414
00:15:59,926 --> 00:16:01,394
[growls]
415
00:16:01,461 --> 00:16:04,664
You barnacle brains are done!
416
00:16:04,731 --> 00:16:06,333
Hyah.
417
00:16:06,399 --> 00:16:07,734
[cannon booms]
both: Whoo-hoo!
418
00:16:07,800 --> 00:16:08,601
[explosion]
419
00:16:08,668 --> 00:16:11,638
We completed a job!
420
00:16:11,704 --> 00:16:14,041
- I think I'm getting
the hang of the job thing.
421
00:16:14,041 --> 00:16:16,043
But did I find my porpoise?
422
00:16:16,076 --> 00:16:17,177
[bell dings, tires squeal]
423
00:16:17,244 --> 00:16:19,312
- It's pronounced "purpose."
424
00:16:19,379 --> 00:16:20,547
[bell dings, tires squeal]
425
00:16:21,414 --> 00:16:22,782
- [grunts]
- Oh!
426
00:16:23,483 --> 00:16:25,652
[both giggle]
427
00:16:26,586 --> 00:16:28,055
- Psst, hey, lady.
428
00:16:28,055 --> 00:16:29,522
We're lookin' for a job.
429
00:16:29,589 --> 00:16:30,657
You think we could, uh,
430
00:16:30,723 --> 00:16:32,792
paint that fence for you?
431
00:16:32,859 --> 00:16:34,427
- Oh, of course.
432
00:16:34,494 --> 00:16:36,196
What sweet boys.
433
00:16:36,263 --> 00:16:39,566
- We could touch up
a few of your wrinkles, too.
434
00:16:41,268 --> 00:16:43,070
- Hmph.
435
00:16:43,936 --> 00:16:47,640
both: * Oh, this is the way
we paint the fence *
436
00:16:47,707 --> 00:16:50,077
* Paint the fence,
paint the fence *
437
00:16:50,143 --> 00:16:52,745
* This is the way
we paint the fence *
438
00:16:52,812 --> 00:16:55,882
* For the nice old lady *
439
00:16:55,948 --> 00:16:56,916
[paint splashing]
440
00:16:56,983 --> 00:16:58,085
- Perfect!
441
00:16:59,352 --> 00:17:00,520
[crashes]
442
00:17:00,587 --> 00:17:02,789
- This house could
use some help too.
443
00:17:04,724 --> 00:17:07,560
- Oh, it's, uh, lovely.
444
00:17:07,627 --> 00:17:09,096
Thank you.
445
00:17:09,096 --> 00:17:11,464
- You haven't seen
anything yet.
446
00:17:11,531 --> 00:17:12,632
Ta-da!
447
00:17:12,699 --> 00:17:15,202
We gave your house a makeover.
448
00:17:15,268 --> 00:17:18,671
- [incoherent mumbling]
- Isn't she beautiful?
449
00:17:20,807 --> 00:17:22,842
[horn honks]
[houses whistling]
450
00:17:22,909 --> 00:17:25,478
- Oh!
451
00:17:25,545 --> 00:17:27,580
- A job well did.
452
00:17:28,981 --> 00:17:31,484
- Thanks for the ride
in your stinky cab.
453
00:17:31,551 --> 00:17:33,986
- Your money
makes this job tolerable.
454
00:17:34,121 --> 00:17:35,122
- [gasps]
455
00:17:35,122 --> 00:17:37,124
Let's be taxi drivers.
456
00:17:37,190 --> 00:17:38,691
- Why take a taxi
457
00:17:38,758 --> 00:17:40,960
when you can ride with Patsy?
458
00:17:41,027 --> 00:17:43,130
- What's a Patsy?
459
00:17:43,196 --> 00:17:44,497
- [panting]
460
00:17:44,564 --> 00:17:45,898
Your stop's coming up.
461
00:17:45,965 --> 00:17:47,967
- So, arrivals or departures?
462
00:17:48,034 --> 00:17:50,137
[horn honking]
- Yes, sir.
463
00:17:50,137 --> 00:17:53,840
- There's no escape
for you this time, Rocky.
464
00:17:53,906 --> 00:17:56,709
- You'll never get me, copper.
465
00:17:56,776 --> 00:17:57,677
- Hm.
- [grumbles]
466
00:17:57,744 --> 00:18:00,147
both: Lunch time.
467
00:18:00,180 --> 00:18:03,150
- [panting]
468
00:18:03,183 --> 00:18:04,417
While they take a break,
469
00:18:04,484 --> 00:18:07,154
let's all watch
another hardboiled episode
470
00:18:07,220 --> 00:18:09,222
of "Noir-Sense."
471
00:18:09,289 --> 00:18:10,290
- [whimpers]
472
00:18:10,357 --> 00:18:11,858
- Now, where was your leg
473
00:18:11,924 --> 00:18:13,460
on Tuesday night?
474
00:18:13,526 --> 00:18:14,527
- My leg?
475
00:18:14,594 --> 00:18:16,663
- We knows it was you.
476
00:18:16,729 --> 00:18:19,599
- [gulps] M-m-m-my leg?
477
00:18:19,666 --> 00:18:21,768
- Myeh, so you won't talk, eh?
478
00:18:21,834 --> 00:18:23,069
Hey, Snapper,
479
00:18:23,170 --> 00:18:24,604
show him what
we'll do to his leg
480
00:18:24,671 --> 00:18:26,539
if he don't make
with the chin-waggin'.
481
00:18:26,606 --> 00:18:30,610
- It would be my pleasure.
482
00:18:30,677 --> 00:18:33,079
- My, l-l-l-leg?
483
00:18:33,180 --> 00:18:36,616
- You'll get a little of this.
484
00:18:36,683 --> 00:18:37,784
Ouch!
485
00:18:37,850 --> 00:18:39,952
- And also some of this.
486
00:18:40,019 --> 00:18:41,221
Oh!
487
00:18:41,288 --> 00:18:43,089
- My leg?
488
00:18:43,190 --> 00:18:45,892
- How 'bout a little of this?
489
00:18:45,958 --> 00:18:49,696
- Ah! He's shavin'
against the grain!
490
00:18:49,762 --> 00:18:51,964
[both grunting and groaning]
491
00:18:52,031 --> 00:18:54,667
- I confess, I did do it!
492
00:18:54,734 --> 00:18:56,403
With my leg.
493
00:18:56,469 --> 00:18:58,205
My leg!
494
00:18:58,238 --> 00:19:00,273
- [vocalizing]
495
00:19:00,340 --> 00:19:01,641
[doorbell rings]
Hey!
496
00:19:01,708 --> 00:19:04,311
It's that weird guy
who wants my money again.
497
00:19:05,412 --> 00:19:07,380
Ugh, gah!
498
00:19:07,447 --> 00:19:11,751
- I can see you, Mr. Star.
499
00:19:11,818 --> 00:19:13,320
- Nobody's home!
500
00:19:13,386 --> 00:19:14,354
- [sighs]
501
00:19:14,421 --> 00:19:18,291
[both panting]
502
00:19:18,358 --> 00:19:19,426
Hmm.
503
00:19:19,492 --> 00:19:22,929
That moron
lives with this moron.
504
00:19:22,995 --> 00:19:25,498
Maybe he can get the cash.
505
00:19:25,565 --> 00:19:26,599
Hey!
506
00:19:26,666 --> 00:19:28,401
How would you two like a job?
507
00:19:28,468 --> 00:19:29,769
- [screeching]
508
00:19:29,836 --> 00:19:31,003
- Sure.
509
00:19:31,070 --> 00:19:33,240
I'm still looking
for a porpoise.
510
00:19:33,306 --> 00:19:36,276
- What do you want from me?
Hmph!
511
00:19:36,343 --> 00:19:37,844
- It's very simple.
512
00:19:37,910 --> 00:19:39,812
Just collect my newspaper money
513
00:19:39,879 --> 00:19:41,348
from Mr. Star.
514
00:19:41,414 --> 00:19:43,650
- Who's Mr. Star?
515
00:19:43,716 --> 00:19:44,851
- Cecil.
516
00:19:44,917 --> 00:19:46,286
Your father?
517
00:19:46,353 --> 00:19:47,887
- Oh, him!
518
00:19:47,954 --> 00:19:50,257
Oh, but his name's
not Seashell.
519
00:19:50,257 --> 00:19:51,123
It's Dad.
520
00:19:51,258 --> 00:19:53,025
- That's my dad's name, too!
521
00:19:53,092 --> 00:19:55,061
- No way! Jinx.
- Yeah!
522
00:19:55,127 --> 00:19:57,830
- Do you think you can
possibly handle this job?
523
00:19:57,897 --> 00:19:59,131
- Of course.
524
00:19:59,266 --> 00:20:02,034
You're not talking
to a couple of noobs.
525
00:20:02,101 --> 00:20:04,971
- Yeah, we've had three jobs
since breakfast.
526
00:20:06,573 --> 00:20:08,441
[knocking on door]
- Mm-hmm.
527
00:20:08,508 --> 00:20:09,476
- [muttering]
528
00:20:09,542 --> 00:20:10,910
[door slams]
529
00:20:10,977 --> 00:20:12,612
- Well, did you get the money?
530
00:20:12,679 --> 00:20:14,781
- Nope, he sent us packing.
531
00:20:14,847 --> 00:20:17,517
- Try harder!
532
00:20:17,584 --> 00:20:19,419
- Harder?
533
00:20:19,486 --> 00:20:20,553
- What do we do?
534
00:20:20,620 --> 00:20:21,821
- Uh...
535
00:20:21,888 --> 00:20:23,990
- [clears throat]
536
00:20:24,056 --> 00:20:27,427
- Oh, we gotta be like
those tough guys on TV.
537
00:20:29,061 --> 00:20:30,597
[knocking on door]
538
00:20:30,663 --> 00:20:32,765
- That's an interestin'
newspaper
539
00:20:32,832 --> 00:20:35,902
you get delivered.
- Wha--?
540
00:20:35,968 --> 00:20:38,070
- Be a shame
if it was to get all
541
00:20:38,137 --> 00:20:40,039
wet and soggy.
- [distant screaming]
542
00:20:40,106 --> 00:20:42,875
- [gasps]
Not the Sunday edition!
543
00:20:42,942 --> 00:20:45,678
[vacuum whooshing]
544
00:20:45,745 --> 00:20:46,746
- Huh?
545
00:20:46,813 --> 00:20:48,348
- You ain't getting my money!
546
00:20:49,649 --> 00:20:50,917
[knocking on door]
547
00:20:50,983 --> 00:20:53,553
- We're gone now!
[giggles]
548
00:20:55,322 --> 00:20:56,255
- Oh!
549
00:20:56,323 --> 00:20:57,290
- [chuckles]
550
00:20:57,357 --> 00:21:01,160
[door clatters]
551
00:21:01,328 --> 00:21:02,495
- Oh!
552
00:21:02,562 --> 00:21:03,763
[both shout]
553
00:21:04,497 --> 00:21:07,334
- Myeh, looks like
we'll have to give this mug
554
00:21:07,367 --> 00:21:09,101
the big tip.
555
00:21:10,437 --> 00:21:12,872
[both laughing]
556
00:21:12,939 --> 00:21:15,342
- Ooh!
557
00:21:15,408 --> 00:21:18,345
[grunts]
558
00:21:18,345 --> 00:21:20,246
[groans]
559
00:21:20,347 --> 00:21:22,749
- We gotcha now, deadbeat!
560
00:21:22,815 --> 00:21:24,917
- Here, take my filthy lucre!
561
00:21:24,984 --> 00:21:25,985
- Yoink.
562
00:21:26,052 --> 00:21:27,620
Thanks.
- Ahem.
563
00:21:27,687 --> 00:21:30,256
I'll collect my money now.
564
00:21:30,357 --> 00:21:33,092
- And I'll collect our pay.
565
00:21:33,159 --> 00:21:35,227
- Ooh!
[both laugh]
566
00:21:35,362 --> 00:21:37,364
- Huh?
567
00:21:37,430 --> 00:21:40,467
[screams]
568
00:21:40,533 --> 00:21:43,135
- So, what did we learn today,
Patrick?
569
00:21:43,202 --> 00:21:45,237
- I don't want any more jobs.
570
00:21:45,372 --> 00:21:46,939
They're too much work.
571
00:21:47,006 --> 00:21:49,542
I have found my true porpoise:
572
00:21:49,609 --> 00:21:52,011
doing my TV show!
573
00:21:52,078 --> 00:21:55,281
- Really?
Then what do I do with this?
574
00:21:55,382 --> 00:21:57,650
- Let me go, you little--
[dolphin squawking]
575
00:21:57,717 --> 00:22:00,186
- Hey, watch your language.
576
00:22:00,252 --> 00:22:03,623
This is a family show.
577
00:22:03,690 --> 00:22:05,992
- The end is so itchy.
578
00:22:06,058 --> 00:22:08,961
[goofy upbeat music]
579
00:22:09,028 --> 00:22:16,168
* *
580
00:22:16,218 --> 00:22:20,768
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