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♪♪
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- Good evening Mr. and
Mrs. North and South America,
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and all our ships at sea,
let's get a fresh flesh-- -flash!
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Congress today has called
an emergency session,
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but as yet no one has shown up.
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And the President refuses
to issue a statement,
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having locked himself
and the Vice President
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in his bath-room early this morning.
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However, the First Lady
urges all, and I quote,
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"Seek comfort in the Bible," unquote.
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A bulletin just in, the
world's top scientists
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are holding a conference
in Washington, D.C.,
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awaiting a statement
from Professor Gordon,
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world authority on animal
behavior and renowned physicist.
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- Gentlemen, we are in big trouble.
16
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- Sex madness perils planet!
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Extra! Read all about it!
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Sex madness perils planet!
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Get it now, read all about it!
20
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Sex madness perils planet!
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Hey, scram you horny jerks!
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- Gentlemen!
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As I have told you,
we are in big trouble.
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I think there is no need
for me to describe to you
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the incredible chaos our beloved planet
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has been plunged into.
27
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Of the disgrace-ful acts
which are being committed
28
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at this very moment!
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In every apartment,
on every street corner,
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or on the rooftops!
31
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In grass huts in the
jungle, in igloos in the Arctic.
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In airports, in markets,
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in movie houses, in the parks!
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Yes, we are in big trouble.
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- Doctor Gordon...
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all of us here are aware
of the total degradation
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that has overcome the masses,
38
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but what are we going to do about it?
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What is causing it?
40
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- Now I say it's a virus and
we must find a vaccine for it!
41
00:03:07,734 --> 00:03:08,902
- It is not a virus,
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any fool can see it's a
case of mass hypnosis!
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- Hypnosis-- ha! I've done research
44
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and traced the cause to
cans of bad Passover tuna.
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- Tuna fish, tuna fish!
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This guy's got mercury on his brain!
47
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- Gentlemen!
48
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Gentlemen, we must be calm!
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Future generations are depending
on decisions made here today.
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Now, I have discovered three
things about this madness.
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Number one, not all areas are affected.
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Look around you, are anyone
of you sexually aroused?
53
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- Yes, ha-ha-ha!
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- Anyone of you, huh? No!
55
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Not all areas have been affected.
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Number Two, my son,
who has been rep-resenting
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United States at the tenth
international ice hockey
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playoffs in Tibet,
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has discovered what appears
to be a great beam of light
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proceeding from some far off planet
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whose appearance is simultaneous
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with the first occurrence yesterday.
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Number three, I discovered my wife...
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in bed with the garbage man.
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- But what about your son, professor?
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Did he find anything else out?
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00:04:31,359 --> 00:04:33,111
- Yes Professor, what are
you holding back from us?
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- What's the scoop?
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- My son is at this very moment,
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00:04:36,281 --> 00:04:39,493
'on his way back to this country
and as soon as he has landed...
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we shall all find out.
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♪♪
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♪♪
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♪♪
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♪♪
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♪♪
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♪♪
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- Mable Towers, Mable Towers,
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we're experiencing foul weather.
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- Sorry!
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Oh, oooh, I'm sorry.
82
00:08:14,666 --> 00:08:15,834
- Oh, that's all right.
83
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Is this your first flight?
- My first drink.
84
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It's a terrible storm,
85
00:08:25,844 --> 00:08:28,013
do you think we're going to make it?
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00:08:28,096 --> 00:08:30,765
Don't worry.
87
00:08:30,849 --> 00:08:33,309
These new Fordent trimotors
are the safest things in the sky.
88
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- My name is Dale Ardor, what's yours?
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00:08:43,987 --> 00:08:46,281
- Flesh. Flesh Gordon.
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- Oh, Professor Gordon's son?
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- Why yes.
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Sir, look out!
93
00:09:13,892 --> 00:09:15,518
- Control yourself, Dale!
94
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Control yourself, Dale! Dale!
95
00:09:18,688 --> 00:09:20,648
Con-control yourself, Dale!
96
00:09:22,233 --> 00:09:25,361
- Sir, I've got a giant boner!
97
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- Well slap the damn thing down.
98
00:09:27,030 --> 00:09:27,989
- I can't!
99
00:09:28,073 --> 00:09:29,074
- I've got to keep this
thing under control.
100
00:09:29,157 --> 00:09:30,033
- I can't!
101
00:09:32,410 --> 00:09:34,954
- Mable Towers, Mable Towers.
102
00:09:35,038 --> 00:09:37,707
You got two horny son-of-a-bitches here.
103
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We're signing off.
104
00:10:07,695 --> 00:10:09,531
- Dale! There's no one at the controls!
105
00:10:09,614 --> 00:10:10,615
The plane's going down!
106
00:10:10,698 --> 00:10:12,075
- Go down, go down!
107
00:10:12,158 --> 00:10:15,537
Oh yes, oh yes. Oh, Flesh.
108
00:10:19,457 --> 00:10:22,460
Flesh! Flesh!
109
00:10:24,379 --> 00:10:26,673
Oh, Flesh!
110
00:10:29,676 --> 00:10:31,845
Flesh!
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00:10:35,890 --> 00:10:37,308
Let me go!
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Flesh!
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Flesh-- oh!
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♪♪
115
00:10:53,741 --> 00:10:55,743
- Dale. We'll have to bail out.
116
00:11:04,002 --> 00:11:07,463
- Flesh, oh my God, ooh.
117
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Oh my god!
118
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- Just hold on!
119
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- I can't hold anymore!
120
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Ooohhh. Oh!
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♪♪
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Flesh, mmm.
123
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- Dale?
124
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Dale, darling, are you all right?
125
00:11:50,798 --> 00:11:52,550
- You called me "darling."”
126
00:11:52,634 --> 00:11:55,345
Oh, Flesh, what's happening?
127
00:12:04,187 --> 00:12:06,022
- Can you walk?
- I think so.
128
00:12:14,614 --> 00:12:16,950
- Here, put this on.
129
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♪♪
130
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- Flesh, what's that?
131
00:12:30,505 --> 00:12:31,589
- Looks like some sort of building.
132
00:12:31,673 --> 00:12:33,174
Come on, maybe we can
get to a telephone there.
133
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- Stop.
134
00:12:34,759 --> 00:12:37,053
Not another step further.
135
00:12:37,136 --> 00:12:39,180
I know what you've come here for.
136
00:12:39,264 --> 00:12:41,349
But you're not going to get it.
137
00:12:41,432 --> 00:12:43,851
- Look, I don't know
who you think we are,
138
00:12:43,935 --> 00:12:47,563
but this girl's hurt, and
we gotta get to a telephone.
139
00:12:47,647 --> 00:12:49,691
You see, we were flying
along in this airplane from Tibet,
140
00:12:49,774 --> 00:12:52,277
when suddenly we were hit
by this sex ray from outer space.
141
00:12:52,360 --> 00:12:54,112
And this unrestrained sex orgy ensued,
142
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which both of the pilots joined in.
143
00:12:56,406 --> 00:12:57,699
When I noticed the plane was going down,
144
00:12:57,782 --> 00:12:58,825
I took over the controls
145
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but they broke off in my hand.
146
00:13:00,159 --> 00:13:01,452
So you see the young lady,
147
00:13:01,536 --> 00:13:03,162
nearly overcome with sex madness,
148
00:13:03,246 --> 00:13:06,082
and myself, bailed out just
before the plane crashed.
149
00:13:06,165 --> 00:13:07,542
And we landed just over there.
150
00:13:07,625 --> 00:13:09,794
- Do you take me for a fool?
151
00:13:09,877 --> 00:13:12,130
Do you think I don't know
you've come here to steal
152
00:13:12,213 --> 00:13:14,674
the secret plans to my new Interstellar,
153
00:13:14,757 --> 00:13:17,677
Hydrocombustion, miracle
patented, micro-teflon,
154
00:13:17,760 --> 00:13:20,680
nuclear, gamastaddle
rocketship-plane-missle!
155
00:13:20,763 --> 00:13:23,891
Which was twenty years in the making.
156
00:13:23,975 --> 00:13:26,060
And employs a new updraft design,
157
00:13:26,144 --> 00:13:28,938
which lifts the ship on small spirals
158
00:13:29,022 --> 00:13:31,774
of synthetic strontium pellets.
159
00:13:31,858 --> 00:13:33,651
Do you think I don't know that!
160
00:13:33,735 --> 00:13:35,820
Well, I've never even heard of it.
161
00:13:35,903 --> 00:13:38,114
So you're barking up the wrong tree.
162
00:13:38,197 --> 00:13:39,574
Come here, young lady.
163
00:13:39,657 --> 00:13:41,659
I would like to conduct
a little experiment,
164
00:13:41,743 --> 00:13:44,120
you see there's evidence
that exposure to the sex ray,
165
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increases the size of the secondary--
166
00:13:45,997 --> 00:13:47,373
- Jerkoff!
- What?
167
00:13:47,457 --> 00:13:50,418
- Flexi Jerkoff, I
thought I recognized you.
168
00:13:50,501 --> 00:13:53,129
- Why... why you must be Flesh,
169
00:13:53,212 --> 00:13:55,548
Professor Gordon's son.
170
00:13:55,631 --> 00:13:58,926
I was wondering why you
knew so much about the sex ray.
171
00:13:59,010 --> 00:14:02,930
Come, let me show you the ship.
172
00:14:03,014 --> 00:14:05,016
- Gosh, let me introduce you.
173
00:14:05,099 --> 00:14:08,019
Dale Ardor, this is Doctor Flexi Jerkoff.
174
00:14:08,102 --> 00:14:10,188
How do you do?
175
00:14:13,066 --> 00:14:15,526
- So you see, I've actually
discovered which planet
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00:14:15,610 --> 00:14:17,362
the sex ray is coming from,
177
00:14:17,445 --> 00:14:20,865
and fortunately, the straddle
ship was ready just in time.
178
00:14:20,948 --> 00:14:23,743
Oh, you can't know
what it was like, out here,
179
00:14:23,826 --> 00:14:26,120
all alone when the sex ray hit.
180
00:14:26,204 --> 00:14:28,081
It was hell!
181
00:14:28,164 --> 00:14:31,376
Fortunately, the rocket was
completed before that happened,
182
00:14:31,459 --> 00:14:35,463
and the design was not influenced.
183
00:14:36,547 --> 00:14:38,091
- You look so funny.
184
00:14:40,927 --> 00:14:51,562
♪♪
185
00:14:51,646 --> 00:14:53,815
Oh, the likeness is incredible.
186
00:14:53,898 --> 00:14:55,775
- I was able to get most of the parts
187
00:14:55,858 --> 00:14:57,944
from the Sears catalogue.
188
00:14:58,027 --> 00:14:59,237
- And you really think it will make it to
189
00:14:59,320 --> 00:15:01,072
the outer reaches of the solar system?
190
00:15:01,155 --> 00:15:02,907
- It's got to.
191
00:15:02,990 --> 00:15:06,411
It's the last hope humanity has.
192
00:15:06,494 --> 00:15:09,080
Flesh... Dale...
193
00:15:09,163 --> 00:15:10,957
will you come with me?
194
00:15:11,040 --> 00:15:12,792
It will be a dangerous trip,
195
00:15:12,875 --> 00:15:15,670
and I don't know what we're
likely to encounter out there,
196
00:15:15,753 --> 00:15:17,755
but someone has got to save the earth
197
00:15:17,839 --> 00:15:20,299
from the treacherous
clutches of that evil ray.
198
00:15:23,553 --> 00:15:24,720
- What do you think, Dale?
199
00:15:24,804 --> 00:15:27,098
- Flesh, let's do it.
200
00:15:27,181 --> 00:15:29,100
- Sure, why not, we'll give it a try.
201
00:15:29,183 --> 00:15:30,518
- Wonderful!
202
00:15:30,601 --> 00:15:32,812
The planet's orbit will
bring it closest to the earth
203
00:15:32,895 --> 00:15:35,189
in approximately...
204
00:15:35,273 --> 00:15:36,858
Six minutes!
205
00:15:36,941 --> 00:15:38,526
And there's much work to be done.
206
00:15:38,609 --> 00:15:40,194
Come, follow me.
207
00:15:40,278 --> 00:15:55,084
♪♪
208
00:15:56,043 --> 00:15:57,753
- Where do you want these, doc?
209
00:15:57,837 --> 00:16:00,256
- Right over there Flesh, storage bin C.
210
00:16:10,433 --> 00:16:25,156
♪♪
211
00:16:31,662 --> 00:16:33,122
- What's this gizmo do, doc?
212
00:16:33,206 --> 00:16:35,500
- Don't touch that dial!
213
00:16:35,583 --> 00:16:38,711
I had an assistant once
who touched that dial.
214
00:16:38,794 --> 00:16:40,796
Touch that dial.
215
00:16:47,220 --> 00:16:49,055
- Gee doc, you really
got a lot of neat stuff.
216
00:16:49,138 --> 00:16:50,723
Did it take you a long
time to put it all together?
217
00:16:50,806 --> 00:16:53,809
- Don't bother me now,
Flesh, it's almost ready.
218
00:16:53,893 --> 00:16:55,853
Get the door.
219
00:17:00,107 --> 00:17:02,151
- Which button, doc?
220
00:17:02,235 --> 00:17:06,113
- That one.
221
00:17:15,748 --> 00:17:18,960
Ignition.
222
00:17:19,043 --> 00:17:20,503
- Ready, Dale?
- Ready, Flesh.
223
00:17:20,586 --> 00:17:23,172
- All right, hang on. We're taking off.
224
00:17:26,551 --> 00:17:28,511
Fire rocket one.
225
00:17:30,429 --> 00:17:42,525
♪♪
226
00:17:42,608 --> 00:17:44,610
Fire rocket two.
227
00:17:47,280 --> 00:17:51,784
♪♪
228
00:17:54,412 --> 00:18:09,510
♪♪
229
00:18:14,098 --> 00:18:15,891
Hang on now,
230
00:18:15,975 --> 00:18:18,227
we're going through the moronosphere.
231
00:18:19,895 --> 00:18:34,577
♪♪
232
00:18:41,417 --> 00:18:56,223
♪♪
233
00:19:04,273 --> 00:19:12,239
♪♪
234
00:19:12,323 --> 00:19:14,909
- Look, Dale!
235
00:19:14,992 --> 00:19:16,827
- The moon!
236
00:19:16,911 --> 00:19:18,412
- The Earth!
237
00:19:18,496 --> 00:19:20,456
- Oh, it's beautiful.
238
00:19:20,539 --> 00:19:25,836
♪♪
239
00:19:25,920 --> 00:19:29,090
- Wow! I can see the Great Lakes!
240
00:19:29,173 --> 00:19:31,634
There's Lake Ontario, Lake Michigan,
241
00:19:31,717 --> 00:19:33,386
Lake Superior--
242
00:19:33,469 --> 00:19:34,512
- What is it, Dale?
243
00:19:34,595 --> 00:19:35,721
- The sex ray, we're
heading right for it,
244
00:19:35,805 --> 00:19:37,431
change course quick!
245
00:19:38,933 --> 00:19:41,936
- It's-- it's jammed,
Flesh, I can't move it!
246
00:19:42,019 --> 00:19:44,563
- Let me try!
247
00:20:39,452 --> 00:20:52,506
♪♪
248
00:20:52,590 --> 00:20:54,049
- Another episode like
that, and I'll be ready
249
00:20:54,133 --> 00:20:55,676
for the old folk's home.
250
00:20:55,760 --> 00:21:08,022
♪♪
251
00:21:08,105 --> 00:21:11,942
- Hey Doc, what sort of
planet does it look like to you?
252
00:21:12,026 --> 00:21:14,069
- Definitely inhabited, Flesh.
253
00:21:14,153 --> 00:21:16,238
No natural force could have affected us
254
00:21:16,322 --> 00:21:18,824
the way that sex ray did.
255
00:21:18,908 --> 00:21:21,285
And look at those
green areas over there--
256
00:21:21,368 --> 00:21:23,913
It's probably forest or
jungle, I should think.
257
00:21:23,996 --> 00:21:26,457
And those are desert areas over there.
258
00:21:26,540 --> 00:21:28,793
This planet even has
frigid polar regions,
259
00:21:28,876 --> 00:21:31,337
not unlike those of Earth.
260
00:21:31,420 --> 00:21:35,508
Let's have a closer look, shall we.
261
00:21:37,259 --> 00:21:41,347
♪♪
262
00:21:41,430 --> 00:21:43,724
Hang on, we're going down.
263
00:21:45,643 --> 00:21:53,317
♪♪
264
00:21:53,400 --> 00:21:54,735
- Forgive me, your Protuberance,
265
00:21:54,819 --> 00:21:57,530
but at this moment an
alien ship approaches Porno.
266
00:21:57,613 --> 00:21:59,907
- Probably the Earth people.
267
00:21:59,990 --> 00:22:01,450
Bring the ship down,
268
00:22:01,534 --> 00:22:03,577
but I want the Earthlings
brought to me unharmed.
269
00:22:03,661 --> 00:22:05,663
Understand?
270
00:22:05,746 --> 00:22:07,540
- Yes, your Protuberance.
271
00:22:07,623 --> 00:22:22,513
♪♪
272
00:22:32,273 --> 00:22:34,567
- Not too close, look!
273
00:22:34,650 --> 00:22:36,652
- Do you suppose they're friendly?
274
00:22:36,735 --> 00:22:44,201
♪♪
275
00:22:58,716 --> 00:23:02,136
The starboard gammamodulator's been hit!
276
00:23:02,219 --> 00:23:04,555
- I'll fix it.
- Oh no!
277
00:23:04,638 --> 00:23:06,682
- I can't control the ship, Flesh!
278
00:23:06,765 --> 00:23:10,561
- Hold on, Jerkoff!
- Do something, Flesh!
279
00:23:10,644 --> 00:23:12,396
- I think we're going to crash.
280
00:23:12,479 --> 00:23:16,275
- Oh! Oh, no, what's going to happen?
281
00:23:16,358 --> 00:23:17,443
- Hurry, Flesh!
282
00:23:17,526 --> 00:23:19,904
- I'm hurrying, Jerkoff, I'm hurrying!
283
00:23:19,987 --> 00:23:21,030
- Save us!
284
00:23:21,113 --> 00:23:22,156
- Oooooohhhhhh.
285
00:23:22,239 --> 00:23:23,532
- I'm trying to!
286
00:23:23,616 --> 00:23:25,034
Hurry Flesh!
287
00:23:25,117 --> 00:23:27,036
- We're in deep trouble Flesh.
288
00:23:27,119 --> 00:23:29,288
- Ah, come on, Jerkoff!
289
00:23:29,371 --> 00:23:30,789
- Oh, Flesh, do something!
290
00:23:30,873 --> 00:23:32,041
- Hurry!
- Dale, quick!
291
00:23:32,124 --> 00:23:33,292
Give me a bobby pin! Come here!
292
00:23:33,375 --> 00:23:34,543
- Here's one!
293
00:23:34,627 --> 00:23:37,171
Oh...
294
00:23:37,254 --> 00:23:39,506
Save us.
295
00:23:41,717 --> 00:23:43,636
- Jerkoff, I think I've fixed it!
296
00:23:43,719 --> 00:23:45,554
- Oh, God!
- You're right.
297
00:23:45,638 --> 00:23:48,057
She's beginning to
respond to the controls.
298
00:23:48,140 --> 00:23:50,100
All right now, hang on.
299
00:23:50,184 --> 00:23:52,394
- Hold on Dale.
300
00:23:53,687 --> 00:23:56,440
The ship's falling apart!
301
00:23:56,523 --> 00:23:58,609
- Hold on, Dale!
- I'm holding on.
302
00:23:58,692 --> 00:24:00,653
- I'm taking her down.
303
00:24:10,537 --> 00:24:19,296
♪♪
304
00:24:23,509 --> 00:24:27,304
♪♪
305
00:24:32,685 --> 00:24:35,479
- Dr. Jerkoff, Dr. Jerkoff!
306
00:24:35,562 --> 00:24:37,356
Are you all right?
307
00:24:37,439 --> 00:24:40,150
- Oh, Flesh. I think so.
308
00:24:40,234 --> 00:24:43,570
Is the ship badly damaged, Flesh?
309
00:24:43,654 --> 00:24:45,239
- I don't know, let's go
outside and have a look.
310
00:24:45,322 --> 00:24:47,574
- Yes.
311
00:24:47,658 --> 00:24:49,326
Oh, Dale.
312
00:24:49,410 --> 00:24:52,705
Just a moment, I think
I have something here.
313
00:24:52,788 --> 00:24:54,748
For, uh-- yes.
314
00:24:58,168 --> 00:25:00,838
It was my mother's. She was buried in it.
315
00:25:16,353 --> 00:25:20,441
Good, there's oxygen on this planet.
316
00:25:20,524 --> 00:25:23,193
- This is the strangest
place I've ever seen.
317
00:25:23,277 --> 00:25:25,154
- I wonder why they didn't
send the welcoming committee?
318
00:25:25,237 --> 00:25:27,239
- They did, look!
319
00:25:29,074 --> 00:25:30,743
- Quick, into that cave!
320
00:25:30,826 --> 00:25:34,663
♪♪
321
00:25:34,747 --> 00:25:37,583
- Sist and decease!
322
00:25:39,668 --> 00:25:51,221
♪♪
323
00:25:51,305 --> 00:25:53,265
- Quick, in here!
324
00:25:53,348 --> 00:25:58,687
♪♪
325
00:25:58,771 --> 00:26:02,357
- Hep, Hep, Hep.
326
00:26:02,441 --> 00:26:06,070
Hep, Hep, Hep.
327
00:26:06,153 --> 00:26:09,698
Left, left, left.
328
00:26:09,782 --> 00:26:11,116
You men search over there.
329
00:26:11,200 --> 00:26:13,077
Left, left, left...
330
00:26:19,875 --> 00:26:21,335
- They'll be coming back.
331
00:26:21,418 --> 00:26:23,670
Let's go this way, maybe
there's another way out.
332
00:26:25,005 --> 00:26:39,645
♪♪
333
00:26:45,526 --> 00:26:48,070
- It's so strange in here.
334
00:26:48,153 --> 00:26:50,572
Flesh, it almost looks alive.
335
00:26:50,656 --> 00:26:53,909
What is it, Flesh?
336
00:26:53,992 --> 00:26:55,911
- I'm not quite sure.
337
00:26:55,994 --> 00:27:10,759
♪♪
338
00:27:19,852 --> 00:27:22,729
- And what unusual
formations and textures.
339
00:27:22,813 --> 00:27:25,941
Why, this is like no
rock known to science.
340
00:27:26,024 --> 00:27:27,192
It's...
341
00:27:27,276 --> 00:27:28,944
It's not hard like a rock,
342
00:27:29,027 --> 00:27:30,237
it's--
343
00:27:30,320 --> 00:27:31,780
Whoaaaaaaaaa!
344
00:27:35,409 --> 00:27:37,161
Great galaxies!
345
00:27:40,831 --> 00:27:42,457
- What is it doc?
346
00:27:42,541 --> 00:27:45,419
- Some species of
penisaurus, I should think.
347
00:27:58,849 --> 00:28:00,392
This way!
348
00:28:02,060 --> 00:28:16,992
♪♪
349
00:28:22,497 --> 00:28:24,041
- Jerkoff! She'd down!
350
00:28:24,124 --> 00:28:25,959
- What-- oh, oh!
351
00:28:27,586 --> 00:28:29,004
- Better get this, Jerkoff.
352
00:28:33,175 --> 00:28:36,428
- Oh, you beast, get away from me!
353
00:28:36,511 --> 00:28:38,263
You stink!
354
00:28:43,936 --> 00:28:45,103
- All right, Flesh.
355
00:28:45,187 --> 00:28:46,772
- Stand aside.
356
00:28:51,401 --> 00:28:53,654
- Oh, no!
357
00:28:55,072 --> 00:29:02,371
♪♪
358
00:29:02,454 --> 00:29:06,333
- Left, left, left...
359
00:29:19,638 --> 00:29:21,640
- Ah, ha.
360
00:29:34,987 --> 00:29:36,905
Oh!
361
00:29:40,867 --> 00:29:43,203
- Flesh!
362
00:29:43,287 --> 00:29:44,705
- What was that?
363
00:29:46,039 --> 00:29:48,417
- The Earth people. It
came from down there.
364
00:29:48,500 --> 00:29:50,043
After them.
- Run.
365
00:29:52,296 --> 00:29:53,797
- No!
366
00:29:53,880 --> 00:29:56,466
- There they are.
367
00:29:59,219 --> 00:30:01,346
- What?
368
00:30:05,100 --> 00:30:06,727
- Take the earthlings alive. Tie them up.
369
00:30:06,810 --> 00:30:09,521
- I got dibs on the girl.
- The blonde giant's mine.
370
00:30:09,604 --> 00:30:11,648
- Leave the bearded one for me.
371
00:30:11,732 --> 00:30:26,038
♪♪
372
00:30:32,002 --> 00:30:44,139
♪♪
373
00:30:44,222 --> 00:30:45,766
- Your Sickness, we have
captured the Earth people,
374
00:30:45,849 --> 00:30:47,642
and await your command.
375
00:30:47,726 --> 00:30:49,895
- The Earth people, eh?
376
00:30:52,647 --> 00:30:57,110
Bring them to me at once.
377
00:30:57,194 --> 00:30:59,488
- Fetch the Earth people here!
378
00:30:59,571 --> 00:31:02,657
His Sickness will seeeee theeemmmm!
379
00:31:02,741 --> 00:31:06,620
- Stop shouting, you dildo.
380
00:31:06,703 --> 00:31:21,134
♪♪
381
00:31:36,691 --> 00:31:40,654
Why have you come to the planet Porno?
382
00:31:40,737 --> 00:31:43,240
- To destroy the terrible
sex ray that has brought
383
00:31:43,323 --> 00:31:46,535
chaos to our beloved planet Earth.
384
00:31:46,618 --> 00:31:49,955
- I should think you'd be thanking me.
385
00:31:50,038 --> 00:31:52,916
But no matter.
386
00:31:52,999 --> 00:31:56,878
No power in the universe
can ever hope to squelch
387
00:31:56,962 --> 00:32:01,633
the infinite force of my sex beam.
388
00:32:01,716 --> 00:32:03,969
- But why must you do this thing?
389
00:32:04,052 --> 00:32:06,012
The Earth is a peaceful planet
390
00:32:06,096 --> 00:32:08,098
and poses no threat to you!
391
00:32:10,517 --> 00:32:13,353
- I'll tell you later.
392
00:32:16,356 --> 00:32:19,067
But, how did you get here?
393
00:32:19,151 --> 00:32:21,736
- The straddle ship I constructed.
394
00:32:21,820 --> 00:32:24,197
- A scientist, eh?
395
00:32:24,281 --> 00:32:27,159
I could use a brain like yours.
396
00:32:27,242 --> 00:32:28,493
Guards!
397
00:32:28,577 --> 00:32:32,164
Take him to the laboratory
and show him what to do.
398
00:32:33,373 --> 00:32:36,376
- No, no, no!
399
00:32:36,460 --> 00:32:43,216
♪♪
400
00:32:43,300 --> 00:32:46,845
- Bring the Earth woman closer.
401
00:32:46,928 --> 00:32:49,389
- No! No!
402
00:32:51,892 --> 00:32:55,520
- By the Goddess Yumi, you are beautiful!
403
00:32:55,604 --> 00:33:00,400
My eyes have never
beheld such loveliness.
404
00:33:00,484 --> 00:33:04,154
You shall be my bride!
405
00:33:04,237 --> 00:33:05,322
- No!
406
00:33:05,405 --> 00:33:09,075
- Ohhhh, she is exquisite,
407
00:33:09,159 --> 00:33:13,079
she is exquisite.
408
00:33:13,163 --> 00:33:14,956
- Take your filthy, yellow hands off her!
409
00:33:15,040 --> 00:33:16,041
- Silence!
410
00:33:16,124 --> 00:33:16,750
- Don't touch her, I'll kill you!
411
00:33:16,833 --> 00:33:18,043
- Silence! Get him off me!
412
00:33:18,126 --> 00:33:19,377
Take him!
413
00:33:19,461 --> 00:33:23,089
Take him to the sex depletor
and bring me his essence!
414
00:33:23,173 --> 00:33:25,509
It should add
immeasurably to the pleasure
415
00:33:25,592 --> 00:33:27,594
of our wedding night.
416
00:33:29,179 --> 00:33:30,305
- Stop.
417
00:33:30,388 --> 00:33:33,350
The blonde giant shall not be depleted.
418
00:33:33,433 --> 00:33:36,895
- Amora. As Queen of Darkness,
419
00:33:36,978 --> 00:33:39,856
and guardian of the sacred power pasties,
420
00:33:39,940 --> 00:33:42,275
you have the privilege to spare him only
421
00:33:42,359 --> 00:33:45,612
if he survives the torture I ordain.
422
00:33:46,905 --> 00:33:51,326
I sentence him to trial by ordeal.
423
00:33:51,409 --> 00:33:53,328
- So be it, then, Wang.
424
00:33:53,411 --> 00:33:56,248
But if he survives, he's mine!
425
00:33:56,331 --> 00:33:58,166
- To the arena with him!
426
00:34:00,043 --> 00:34:11,513
♪♪
427
00:34:20,689 --> 00:34:23,775
♪♪
428
00:34:28,321 --> 00:34:43,420
♪♪
429
00:34:49,926 --> 00:35:04,232
♪♪
430
00:35:14,284 --> 00:35:29,382
♪♪
431
00:35:42,520 --> 00:35:51,321
♪♪
432
00:35:52,155 --> 00:35:54,741
To the depletor with him!
433
00:35:54,824 --> 00:35:58,828
- He's mine, he's mine, he's mine,
434
00:35:58,912 --> 00:36:01,289
he's mine, he's mine!
435
00:36:08,254 --> 00:36:10,173
- After them, you ninnies!
436
00:36:10,256 --> 00:36:25,438
♪♪
437
00:36:45,250 --> 00:36:48,837
- Sleep now, and forget.
438
00:36:48,920 --> 00:36:51,548
Forget all.
439
00:36:51,631 --> 00:36:56,344
We shall love, and my body...
440
00:36:56,428 --> 00:36:59,973
will be linked forever with yours.
441
00:37:01,808 --> 00:37:07,647
When you awake, you
shall be my King of Darkness.
442
00:37:07,731 --> 00:37:22,454
♪♪
443
00:37:32,505 --> 00:37:47,395
♪♪
444
00:37:57,906 --> 00:38:00,241
Oh, Gordon...
445
00:38:04,746 --> 00:38:19,594
♪♪
446
00:38:46,246 --> 00:38:48,540
- Your Protuberance, we have
spotted Queen Amora's ship
447
00:38:48,623 --> 00:38:50,083
over the forest kingdom.
448
00:38:51,709 --> 00:38:55,296
- Shoot them down, and bring them to me!
449
00:38:55,380 --> 00:38:57,048
- But your assholiness,
450
00:38:57,131 --> 00:38:59,384
the forest people and
we are sworn enemies.
451
00:38:59,467 --> 00:39:01,135
We could not survive
a landing in this realm.
452
00:39:01,219 --> 00:39:04,722
- Are you afraid of a few vegetables?
453
00:39:04,806 --> 00:39:07,267
I gave you my orders!
454
00:39:07,350 --> 00:39:10,019
I will be obeyed!
455
00:39:10,103 --> 00:39:13,189
- Yes, degenerate one.
456
00:39:13,273 --> 00:39:15,859
- Make ready for the ceremony!
457
00:39:15,942 --> 00:39:19,445
Porno shall have a new Queen tonight.
458
00:39:20,989 --> 00:39:23,116
Out of my way, dildo!
459
00:39:37,380 --> 00:39:39,841
- Guard, I need your help.
460
00:39:39,924 --> 00:39:42,427
Here, hold that.
461
00:39:42,510 --> 00:39:45,471
This, hold that too...
462
00:39:45,555 --> 00:39:48,308
and this also, please--
463
00:39:48,391 --> 00:39:50,310
And just one more thing,
464
00:39:50,393 --> 00:39:52,770
that's it.
465
00:39:52,854 --> 00:39:54,772
Very good.
466
00:39:54,856 --> 00:39:56,774
Put up your hands!
467
00:40:00,904 --> 00:40:11,456
♪♪
468
00:40:11,539 --> 00:40:13,750
Down, please.
469
00:40:13,833 --> 00:40:28,806
♪♪
470
00:40:36,064 --> 00:40:37,231
Give me the keys.
471
00:40:41,986 --> 00:40:50,912
♪♪
472
00:40:53,164 --> 00:41:07,595
♪♪
473
00:41:13,101 --> 00:41:15,895
- Oh, come in me!
474
00:41:15,979 --> 00:41:18,481
Damn, you magnificent giant.
475
00:41:19,774 --> 00:41:23,403
Come, come, come!
476
00:41:23,486 --> 00:41:26,489
And bind us forever in darkness.
477
00:41:29,033 --> 00:41:43,715
♪♪
478
00:41:53,683 --> 00:42:07,572
♪♪
479
00:42:14,120 --> 00:42:28,760
♪♪
480
00:42:38,019 --> 00:42:46,110
♪♪
481
00:43:21,979 --> 00:43:36,786
♪♪
482
00:43:44,919 --> 00:43:46,087
-W...
-A...
483
00:43:46,170 --> 00:43:47,839
- N...
-G...
484
00:43:47,922 --> 00:43:50,758
- Emperor Wang is the one for me,
485
00:43:50,842 --> 00:43:54,303
Without him, the planet Porno,
486
00:43:54,387 --> 00:43:57,723
would be ever so forlorno.
487
00:44:13,447 --> 00:44:16,617
- ...Francis Newberry.
488
00:44:19,078 --> 00:44:33,801
♪♪
489
00:44:49,984 --> 00:45:04,957
♪♪
490
00:45:06,542 --> 00:45:08,252
- Jerkoff!
491
00:45:08,336 --> 00:45:11,881
- Flesh! I thought you were Amora.
492
00:45:11,964 --> 00:45:13,883
- This is all I could find to wear.
493
00:45:13,966 --> 00:45:16,802
How'd you get away from Wang's Palace?
494
00:45:16,886 --> 00:45:20,640
- When I discovered Wang's
plan to destroy Amora's ship,
495
00:45:20,723 --> 00:45:22,934
I overpowered the guard with a radium gas
496
00:45:23,017 --> 00:45:25,019
I developed in Wang's laboratory.
497
00:45:25,102 --> 00:45:27,563
And, disguising myself as a pirate,
498
00:45:27,647 --> 00:45:30,650
followed the bomber ship and
swooped down to rescue you.
499
00:45:32,902 --> 00:45:34,862
- What about Dale?
500
00:45:34,946 --> 00:45:37,823
- Even at this very moment,
the ceremony which will render
501
00:45:37,907 --> 00:45:41,202
Dale and Wang man
and wife draws ever nearer
502
00:45:41,285 --> 00:45:43,454
its fateful conclusion.
503
00:45:43,537 --> 00:45:45,581
It's no use, Flesh.
504
00:45:45,665 --> 00:45:49,794
Alone, we would be powerless to stop it.
505
00:45:49,877 --> 00:45:51,879
Flesh, look!
506
00:45:51,963 --> 00:45:54,632
- I had led an evil life.
507
00:45:54,715 --> 00:45:57,176
And my thoughts have
arisen from the seeds
508
00:45:57,260 --> 00:46:01,222
of darkness and greed. Take these stones.
509
00:46:02,556 --> 00:46:05,268
These are the source of my power.
510
00:46:05,351 --> 00:46:07,812
And with them, destroy Wang
511
00:46:07,895 --> 00:46:11,190
and his insidious schemes.
512
00:46:11,274 --> 00:46:14,610
These, my power pasties,
513
00:46:14,694 --> 00:46:18,614
are the only force that
can stop the sex beam.
514
00:46:20,116 --> 00:46:23,369
Once accomplished, Earthlings,
515
00:46:23,452 --> 00:46:27,164
my spirit shall at last rest in peace.
516
00:46:32,878 --> 00:46:36,590
- She was a noble woman, Flesh.
517
00:46:36,674 --> 00:46:39,260
- Took a lot of guts.
518
00:46:39,343 --> 00:46:43,431
- She was a brave scout.
519
00:46:43,514 --> 00:46:47,143
- Come on, doc, we haven't
got much time to lose.
520
00:46:47,226 --> 00:46:49,145
Wait a minute doc, I can't go like this,
521
00:46:49,228 --> 00:46:51,439
I feel silly.
- Don't worry, Flesh.
522
00:46:51,522 --> 00:46:53,816
I think I've got something
for you in the ship.
523
00:47:13,544 --> 00:47:16,213
- Come on, Jerkoff,
we've got to stop Wang!
524
00:47:18,090 --> 00:47:19,842
- All right, Flesh.
- Come on!
525
00:47:19,925 --> 00:47:21,927
- Oh please.
526
00:47:23,637 --> 00:47:27,099
- Left, left, left, left...
527
00:47:27,183 --> 00:47:34,732
♪♪
528
00:47:34,815 --> 00:47:36,650
Left...
529
00:47:36,734 --> 00:47:39,320
There they are!
530
00:47:41,947 --> 00:47:54,168
♪♪
531
00:47:54,251 --> 00:47:56,712
- You may...
532
00:47:56,796 --> 00:47:59,507
kisssss the bride.
533
00:47:59,590 --> 00:48:02,426
- Ahhh, ha-ha...
534
00:48:02,510 --> 00:48:06,555
come here, my little bottle cap.
535
00:48:06,639 --> 00:48:09,517
- Get away from me you slimy snail!
536
00:48:09,600 --> 00:48:10,976
Oh!
537
00:48:11,060 --> 00:48:16,315
♪♪
538
00:48:18,859 --> 00:48:21,195
- That's all for this
rancid affair, you turkey!
539
00:48:24,115 --> 00:48:26,409
- Stop!
540
00:48:27,576 --> 00:48:28,994
- The wedding's over, Wang!
541
00:48:31,664 --> 00:48:33,416
- After them, you dildos!
542
00:48:33,499 --> 00:48:40,339
♪♪
543
00:48:40,423 --> 00:48:42,508
Amateurs!
544
00:48:44,802 --> 00:48:46,637
- The pasties, Jerkoff!
545
00:48:46,720 --> 00:48:49,807
♪♪
546
00:48:54,478 --> 00:48:56,605
All right, Wang, where is she?
547
00:48:56,689 --> 00:48:57,982
What have you done with Dale?
548
00:48:58,065 --> 00:48:59,775
So help me if you lay
a hand on her I'll----
549
00:48:59,859 --> 00:49:02,194
- You're too late, you fool!
550
00:49:02,278 --> 00:49:04,280
She was spirited away barely a breath
551
00:49:04,363 --> 00:49:06,991
before love's first kiss.
552
00:49:07,074 --> 00:49:11,495
I have been robbed of
my beautiful virgin bride.
553
00:49:11,579 --> 00:49:13,622
- Shall I give it to him now, Flesh?
554
00:49:13,706 --> 00:49:15,791
- Not now doc, he's been through enough.
555
00:49:31,265 --> 00:49:34,810
- If you find her, tell her I love her!
556
00:49:42,943 --> 00:49:45,404
- Stop fighting me foolish
woman, I'm trying to save you!
557
00:49:45,488 --> 00:49:46,739
- Halt!
558
00:49:46,822 --> 00:49:48,365
- I have brought the Earth girl.
559
00:49:48,449 --> 00:49:49,992
- Follow me.
560
00:49:50,075 --> 00:49:54,788
♪♪
561
00:49:54,872 --> 00:49:57,166
- No, no, where are you taking me!
562
00:49:59,877 --> 00:50:02,505
No, no, take me back to Flesh.
563
00:50:05,799 --> 00:50:08,469
No!
564
00:50:08,552 --> 00:50:10,304
No!
565
00:50:18,062 --> 00:50:22,608
♪♪
566
00:50:22,691 --> 00:50:24,527
- The Earth girl.
567
00:50:27,655 --> 00:50:29,907
We've been hoping you'd drop in,
568
00:50:29,990 --> 00:50:33,035
ever since we heard of your
opposition to Emperor Wang.
569
00:50:35,788 --> 00:50:38,249
But, perhaps I should explain.
570
00:50:42,920 --> 00:50:44,797
I---
571
00:50:44,880 --> 00:50:46,799
am Chief Nellie.
572
00:50:46,882 --> 00:50:49,718
Commander of the vast and powerful
573
00:50:49,802 --> 00:50:52,846
Amazon underground of Porno.
574
00:50:52,930 --> 00:50:56,308
An organization solely
devoted to the over-throw
575
00:50:56,392 --> 00:51:00,312
of Wang and his corrupt
male chauvinist regime.
576
00:51:00,396 --> 00:51:02,022
- But what does that have to do with me?
577
00:51:06,819 --> 00:51:09,780
- Our spies have been
watching you closely,
578
00:51:09,863 --> 00:51:13,325
because of your determined
and flagrant dislike
579
00:51:13,409 --> 00:51:16,829
of Wang and his cohorts...
580
00:51:16,912 --> 00:51:19,623
we, uh, have decided to
initiate you into our ranks.
581
00:51:23,460 --> 00:51:26,213
- But I want the Earthman, Flesh Gordon.
582
00:51:26,297 --> 00:51:29,675
- You will be of more use here with us.
583
00:51:29,758 --> 00:51:32,011
- No! No...
584
00:51:34,722 --> 00:51:45,190
♪♪
585
00:51:45,274 --> 00:51:47,693
Wait, what are you doing?
586
00:51:47,776 --> 00:51:49,028
I've gotta get back to Flesh!
587
00:51:53,324 --> 00:51:58,078
♪♪
588
00:52:01,540 --> 00:52:11,508
♪♪
589
00:52:13,927 --> 00:52:16,889
- Ranks in formation,
for selection inspection.
590
00:52:35,783 --> 00:52:37,660
Mmm, very nice face, very pretty.
591
00:52:41,246 --> 00:52:43,707
Nice nipple. Ohhhh, yes, mmm-mmmh...
592
00:52:46,043 --> 00:52:50,172
pretty hair, nice, shiny...
593
00:52:50,255 --> 00:52:53,342
What are you doing
to your nipples, Zerig?
594
00:52:53,425 --> 00:52:56,345
They look very nice. Very nice.
595
00:52:56,428 --> 00:52:59,932
Face is nice-- turn around, let's see.
596
00:53:00,015 --> 00:53:01,392
Bend over, let's see.
597
00:53:01,475 --> 00:53:03,143
Oh, yeah, real nice.
598
00:53:03,227 --> 00:53:05,604
Very nice. Nice bottom.
599
00:53:09,650 --> 00:53:11,944
MMmmm, no! No good.
600
00:53:12,027 --> 00:53:14,196
Step forward.
601
00:53:16,740 --> 00:53:19,785
Oh excellent, excellent,
prepare yourself, you'll do.
602
00:53:26,208 --> 00:53:29,211
- No, no! Oh!
603
00:53:32,756 --> 00:53:41,598
♪♪
604
00:53:53,068 --> 00:53:55,112
Flesh! Flesh!
605
00:53:55,195 --> 00:53:58,031
No! Get away!
606
00:53:58,115 --> 00:54:01,285
Flesh! No! No!
607
00:54:04,997 --> 00:54:07,833
Get away! Get away!
608
00:54:10,544 --> 00:54:12,796
Flesh!
609
00:54:12,880 --> 00:54:14,548
Flesh! Flesh!
610
00:54:14,631 --> 00:54:16,508
Flesh! No!
611
00:54:16,592 --> 00:54:17,634
- Jerkoff.
612
00:54:17,718 --> 00:54:19,344
I heard Dale-- she's
in some sort of trouble.
613
00:54:19,428 --> 00:54:21,263
Jerkoff, I hear Dale--
she's in some sort of trouble.
614
00:54:21,346 --> 00:54:23,557
- Dale!
615
00:54:23,640 --> 00:54:27,060
Get away! Get away!
616
00:54:30,063 --> 00:54:32,191
- We're in some sort of pit, doc.
617
00:54:32,274 --> 00:54:37,488
♪♪
618
00:54:41,617 --> 00:54:53,170
♪♪
619
00:55:08,602 --> 00:55:28,372
♪♪
620
00:55:32,668 --> 00:55:34,795
♪♪
621
00:55:34,878 --> 00:55:35,796
Here let me try.
622
00:55:35,879 --> 00:55:37,589
Try to get us outta here.
623
00:55:44,137 --> 00:55:45,764
Didn't work.
624
00:55:45,848 --> 00:55:47,641
- Stand back, Flesh.
625
00:55:47,724 --> 00:55:50,185
♪♪
626
00:55:56,024 --> 00:55:58,569
- Come on, doc.
627
00:56:13,041 --> 00:56:14,418
There she is, doc.
628
00:56:14,501 --> 00:56:16,420
- Good lord, Flesh, they're dykes!
629
00:56:16,503 --> 00:56:18,922
- Dykes!
630
00:56:23,010 --> 00:56:25,262
- Don't any of you try anything now.
631
00:56:25,345 --> 00:56:27,264
I've got the power pasties
and I know how to use 'em.
632
00:56:29,975 --> 00:56:31,810
You, get back there with the others.
633
00:56:33,145 --> 00:56:34,855
I know your kind.
634
00:56:36,440 --> 00:56:38,108
Now what were you doing down here?
635
00:56:38,191 --> 00:56:39,943
What were you doing with Dale?
636
00:56:41,445 --> 00:56:43,238
Get back there!
637
00:56:52,414 --> 00:56:54,291
- Jerkoff!
638
00:57:14,478 --> 00:57:17,147
♪♪
639
00:57:20,442 --> 00:57:27,032
♪♪
640
00:57:27,115 --> 00:57:29,534
- No, no! You might hit Flesh.
641
00:57:29,618 --> 00:57:33,747
♪♪
642
00:57:49,221 --> 00:58:04,069
♪♪
643
00:58:21,962 --> 00:58:33,181
♪♪
644
00:58:46,570 --> 00:58:57,831
♪♪
645
00:59:20,145 --> 00:59:28,487
♪♪
646
00:59:37,704 --> 00:59:39,498
- What happened to it, Flesh?
647
00:59:42,793 --> 00:59:44,419
- An arrow.
648
00:59:44,503 --> 00:59:46,546
- A poison tipped arrow, in fact.
649
00:59:50,509 --> 00:59:54,096
- Whoever you are, we owe you our lives.
650
00:59:54,179 --> 00:59:55,972
- Nonsense.
651
00:59:56,056 --> 00:59:58,141
I was happy to do it, for you see...
652
00:59:58,225 --> 00:59:59,935
I'm Prince Precious,
653
01:00:00,018 --> 01:00:02,479
rightful heir to the throne of Porno.
654
01:00:02,562 --> 01:00:05,482
Years ago this planet
was a veritable paradise,
655
01:00:05,565 --> 01:00:07,984
but Wang, a maniacal botanist,
656
01:00:08,068 --> 01:00:11,071
whose organ was devoured
by a crazed penis flytrap,
657
01:00:11,154 --> 01:00:14,032
could not tolerate the
existence of so much pleasure.
658
01:00:14,116 --> 01:00:16,910
And so, banding together
an army of the impotent
659
01:00:16,993 --> 01:00:19,496
and frustrated, and armed with a small,
660
01:00:19,579 --> 01:00:21,373
but effective, sex ray,
661
01:00:21,456 --> 01:00:24,084
plunged my Palace into carnal chaos,
662
01:00:24,167 --> 01:00:27,337
and took it over, exiling me,
663
01:00:27,420 --> 01:00:29,631
and my few advisors,
to what is now known as
664
01:00:29,714 --> 01:00:31,424
The Forest Kingdom.
665
01:00:31,508 --> 01:00:33,885
- Then you feel that, together,
666
01:00:33,969 --> 01:00:36,847
we might put an end
to Wang's savage reign.
667
01:00:36,930 --> 01:00:40,392
- And that our new cosmic
friendship might inspire
668
01:00:40,475 --> 01:00:43,270
an everlasting bond of kindness and love
669
01:00:43,353 --> 01:00:45,564
between the peoples
of this planet and yours.
670
01:00:51,069 --> 01:00:53,989
- If there's anything I
can ever do to repay you.
671
01:00:54,072 --> 01:01:09,087
♪♪
672
01:01:34,029 --> 01:01:49,044
♪♪
673
01:02:02,515 --> 01:02:05,644
- Stay a while, Flesh,
the fun's just beginning.
674
01:02:05,727 --> 01:02:07,687
- I'd like to, Precious, but I can't.
675
01:02:07,771 --> 01:02:09,773
I'd better get back to
the lab with Doctor Jerkoff
676
01:02:09,856 --> 01:02:11,775
and help him work on the destructo beam.
677
01:02:11,858 --> 01:02:13,985
- Come, I'll go with you.
678
01:02:25,121 --> 01:02:38,927
♪♪
679
01:02:52,524 --> 01:02:54,567
- Oh, Flesh, I was just
going to send for you.
680
01:02:58,822 --> 01:03:00,532
- What happened, doc?
681
01:03:00,615 --> 01:03:02,367
- Any scientist could tell you, Flesh.
682
01:03:06,037 --> 01:03:08,707
Now, the beam is finished
and ready to be tested.
683
01:03:08,790 --> 01:03:10,792
Now, if my calculations are correct,
684
01:03:10,875 --> 01:03:14,212
one blast from my device
and Wang's odious sex ray
685
01:03:14,296 --> 01:03:16,881
will be utterly smashed to smithereens.
686
01:03:16,965 --> 01:03:18,591
- Well, how does it work, doc?
687
01:03:18,675 --> 01:03:19,926
- I'll show you.
688
01:03:20,010 --> 01:03:22,721
First, we have to
attach the power pasties.
689
01:03:22,804 --> 01:03:24,973
- Let me help you.
690
01:03:25,056 --> 01:03:27,892
♪♪
691
01:03:27,976 --> 01:03:30,854
- Now, over there is a scale
model of Wang's sex ray,
692
01:03:30,937 --> 01:03:33,356
surrounded by an
electromagnesium force field
693
01:03:33,440 --> 01:03:35,567
SO impervious, that were it not for
694
01:03:35,650 --> 01:03:37,944
the energy of Queen
Amora's power pasties,
695
01:03:38,028 --> 01:03:40,613
we could never hope to destroy it.
696
01:03:40,697 --> 01:03:44,534
Now, stand back.
697
01:03:44,617 --> 01:03:47,620
Watch this.
698
01:03:50,123 --> 01:03:52,083
- Wow!
- Fantastic, Doctor.
699
01:03:52,167 --> 01:03:53,209
- That's incredible.
700
01:03:53,293 --> 01:03:55,170
- Congratulations. Congratulation.
701
01:03:55,253 --> 01:03:56,880
- It works, Jerkoff.
702
01:03:56,963 --> 01:03:58,465
It's the eighth wonder of the world.
703
01:03:58,548 --> 01:03:59,716
- I knew it would.
704
01:03:59,799 --> 01:04:02,969
- Then all we have to
do is mount it in a ship.
705
01:04:03,053 --> 01:04:05,930
- And blow Wang's evil ray to atoms.
706
01:04:06,014 --> 01:04:07,849
- Then we can go home, can't we, Flesh?
707
01:04:07,932 --> 01:04:09,851
- With good luck, and good weather, Dale,
708
01:04:09,934 --> 01:04:11,603
we'll be home tomorrow night.
709
01:04:11,686 --> 01:04:13,146
- Oh, Flesh.
710
01:04:13,229 --> 01:04:15,231
- Let me prepare the ship.
- Yes, yes.
711
01:04:15,315 --> 01:04:17,108
- To the ship!
712
01:04:17,192 --> 01:04:30,705
♪♪
713
01:04:34,417 --> 01:04:37,212
- Your Aloneness, the
Earthmen have invented a gun,
714
01:04:37,295 --> 01:04:39,631
with which they plan
to destroy our sex ray.
715
01:04:39,714 --> 01:04:41,091
- Ah!
716
01:04:41,174 --> 01:04:43,301
I have had enough of these meddlers!
717
01:04:43,385 --> 01:04:45,720
They have interfered with
the affairs of my regime
718
01:04:45,804 --> 01:04:47,639
for the very last time,
719
01:04:47,722 --> 01:04:51,184
And they will be stopped.
720
01:04:54,020 --> 01:04:57,357
Now, listen carefully.
721
01:04:57,440 --> 01:05:16,376
♪♪
722
01:05:16,459 --> 01:05:18,545
- Doc, we're getting
close to Wang's palace.
723
01:05:18,628 --> 01:05:21,631
- Just one more minute,
Flesh, I'm almost ready.
724
01:05:24,175 --> 01:05:26,261
Careful!
725
01:05:26,344 --> 01:05:29,055
This device has a delicate
electromagnetic balance.
726
01:05:29,139 --> 01:05:31,516
Any disturbance can blow us all to atoms!
727
01:05:33,935 --> 01:05:36,354
- There it is, Jerkoff, the sex ray.
728
01:05:41,943 --> 01:05:44,863
- It's the Forest Flyer, sound the alarm!
729
01:05:48,908 --> 01:05:51,035
- They've spotted us, Jerkoff, get ready.
730
01:05:57,417 --> 01:05:59,002
Now!
731
01:06:01,921 --> 01:06:03,965
- Stop him!
732
01:06:04,048 --> 01:06:04,966
- He--
733
01:06:06,968 --> 01:06:09,345
- Get him. My pasties!
734
01:06:09,429 --> 01:06:14,184
♪♪
735
01:06:14,267 --> 01:06:16,227
- Pull the ship up, quick!
736
01:06:16,311 --> 01:06:18,438
♪♪
737
01:06:18,521 --> 01:06:20,815
- It's stuck!
- Let me give it a try.
738
01:06:20,899 --> 01:06:27,739
♪♪
739
01:06:27,822 --> 01:06:29,991
- Flesh, we're doomed!
740
01:06:32,243 --> 01:06:38,416
♪♪
741
01:06:41,961 --> 01:06:50,595
♪♪
742
01:06:50,678 --> 01:06:52,931
- We've stopped falling, what's happened?
743
01:06:53,014 --> 01:06:55,183
- We've fallen into some
sort of magnetic beam.
744
01:06:55,266 --> 01:06:57,143
It's drawing us safely down.
745
01:06:57,227 --> 01:06:59,562
- But why would Wang want to save us?
746
01:06:59,646 --> 01:07:01,439
- He doesn't! Look!
747
01:07:03,775 --> 01:07:07,320
♪♪
748
01:07:19,749 --> 01:07:30,218
♪♪
749
01:07:39,352 --> 01:07:58,746
♪♪
750
01:08:17,265 --> 01:08:21,185
- When last seen, our hapless
heroes were about to be crunched
751
01:08:21,269 --> 01:08:25,064
into oblivion by the perverted
Wang's chomping jaws.
752
01:08:25,148 --> 01:08:27,650
Is there no justice on Porno?
753
01:08:29,652 --> 01:08:33,114
♪♪
754
01:08:33,197 --> 01:08:35,199
- Dale, this is yours.
755
01:08:35,283 --> 01:08:38,786
♪♪
756
01:08:38,870 --> 01:08:41,080
Dr. Jerkoff.
757
01:08:44,042 --> 01:08:46,711
Here's one for you, Flesh.
758
01:08:46,794 --> 01:08:54,302
♪♪
759
01:08:54,385 --> 01:08:57,639
- Dale, are you all right?
760
01:08:57,722 --> 01:09:01,225
- I'm all right, Flesh.
761
01:09:01,309 --> 01:09:04,771
- It's really a shame
about that other guy,
762
01:09:04,854 --> 01:09:07,649
stealing your pasties like that,
763
01:09:07,732 --> 01:09:09,984
and he was my best boy.
764
01:09:10,068 --> 01:09:13,529
- What ever happened to the other fellow?
765
01:09:13,613 --> 01:09:17,158
- We only had four parachutes.
766
01:09:17,241 --> 01:09:19,410
- Oh.
767
01:09:19,494 --> 01:09:31,255
♪♪
768
01:09:38,805 --> 01:09:40,473
- Come on, we've got to get to Wang.
769
01:09:40,556 --> 01:09:50,316
♪♪
770
01:09:50,400 --> 01:09:52,985
Come on, Flesh, let's go! Hurry up!
771
01:09:57,824 --> 01:10:00,451
♪♪
772
01:10:02,995 --> 01:10:11,796
♪♪
773
01:10:11,879 --> 01:10:13,840
There he goes, after him.
774
01:10:13,923 --> 01:10:21,347
♪♪
775
01:10:50,626 --> 01:10:56,007
♪♪
776
01:11:02,805 --> 01:11:06,642
- Your struggles are useless!
777
01:11:06,726 --> 01:11:10,730
You are trapped and you shall not live!
778
01:11:10,813 --> 01:11:13,733
I have tolerated your
feeble attempts to thwart me
779
01:11:13,816 --> 01:11:16,819
for the very last time!
780
01:11:16,903 --> 01:11:22,033
We have ways of dealing with you, Yankee.
781
01:11:25,244 --> 01:11:31,042
See how you like my
royal flush, Earthling!
782
01:11:37,381 --> 01:11:38,841
- What is it?
- The floor!
783
01:11:38,925 --> 01:11:40,343
It's opening]
784
01:11:45,807 --> 01:11:49,185
Oh, no.
785
01:11:49,268 --> 01:11:57,318
♪♪
786
01:11:57,401 --> 01:12:00,738
- There used to be one.
- That's it, Earthlings.
787
01:12:00,822 --> 01:12:04,951
Goodbye, Gordon. Sweet dreams.
788
01:12:06,911 --> 01:12:09,163
- Oh.
789
01:12:09,247 --> 01:12:11,123
Here it comes.
790
01:12:11,207 --> 01:12:16,754
♪♪
791
01:12:16,838 --> 01:12:18,881
- Bye, bye!
792
01:12:20,258 --> 01:12:22,468
- Nice knowing you, Flesh.
- Yes, it was, thank you.
793
01:12:32,728 --> 01:12:37,441
♪♪
794
01:12:37,525 --> 01:12:40,862
♪ Flesh Gordon is dead hey ♪
795
01:12:40,945 --> 01:12:44,907
♪ Flesh Gordon is dead hey ♪
796
01:12:44,991 --> 01:12:46,951
♪ Flesh is dead ♪
797
01:12:47,034 --> 01:12:48,870
♪ Gordon is dead ♪
798
01:12:48,953 --> 01:12:52,456
♪ Flesh Gordon is dead ♪
799
01:12:52,540 --> 01:12:55,376
♪ Baby Flesh Gordon is dead ♪
800
01:12:55,459 --> 01:13:05,052
♪♪
801
01:13:05,136 --> 01:13:08,806
♪ Flesh Gordon is dead ♪
802
01:13:08,890 --> 01:13:12,768
♪ Flesh Gordon is dead ♪
803
01:13:12,852 --> 01:13:14,729
♪ Flesh is dead ♪
804
01:13:14,812 --> 01:13:16,898
♪ Flesh is dead ♪
805
01:13:16,981 --> 01:13:20,067
♪ Flesh Gordon is dead ♪
806
01:13:20,151 --> 01:13:22,904
♪ dead dead dead dead ♪
807
01:13:22,987 --> 01:13:35,541
♪♪
808
01:13:35,625 --> 01:13:39,378
♪ Flesh Gordon is dead ♪
809
01:13:39,462 --> 01:13:43,716
♪ Flesh Gordon is dead ♪
810
01:13:43,799 --> 01:13:45,134
- Your Lowness.
811
01:13:50,348 --> 01:13:53,309
Oh-oh, Great Impotentate, I
have done as you commanded,
812
01:13:53,392 --> 01:13:55,937
and I brought you the power jewels.
813
01:13:56,020 --> 01:13:58,314
Though the Earthmen cannot
now destroy the sex beam,
814
01:13:58,397 --> 01:14:00,274
they're alive and loose in the palace---
815
01:14:00,358 --> 01:14:01,609
- Never mind that,
816
01:14:01,692 --> 01:14:02,860
I have dealt with them already!
817
01:14:02,944 --> 01:14:04,904
Give me the jewel.
818
01:14:07,615 --> 01:14:12,870
Did the nasty spy frighten my babies?
819
01:14:12,954 --> 01:14:15,331
Never mind that,
820
01:14:15,414 --> 01:14:19,335
little Wangy-pangy is
going to take care of you all.
821
01:14:23,464 --> 01:14:27,927
Wangy favors you with a trinket,
822
01:14:28,010 --> 01:14:32,682
my little peanut-butter cup.
823
01:14:35,768 --> 01:14:38,062
Hmm.
824
01:14:48,030 --> 01:14:50,032
- Mmm.
825
01:14:57,081 --> 01:14:59,083
- What do you mean it's stuck?
826
01:14:59,166 --> 01:15:01,335
- It's stuck!
- Stuck?
827
01:15:01,419 --> 01:15:03,713
What do you mean, stuck?
828
01:15:03,796 --> 01:15:05,464
Stop!
829
01:15:05,548 --> 01:15:07,425
Flesh Gordon!
830
01:15:12,013 --> 01:15:14,515
- The jewel, Wang!
The jewel, where is it?
831
01:15:14,598 --> 01:15:15,683
Gimme that jewel,
832
01:15:15,766 --> 01:15:17,476
or so help me I'll finish
you right here and now!
833
01:15:17,560 --> 01:15:18,936
- Let me have him, Flesh.
834
01:15:19,020 --> 01:15:21,564
I've been waiting for this
moment for a long time.
835
01:15:21,647 --> 01:15:23,691
- The jewel, Wang, where is it?
836
01:15:23,774 --> 01:15:25,818
- You guess!
837
01:15:25,901 --> 01:15:33,492
♪♪
838
01:15:33,576 --> 01:15:36,996
- Am I gettin' warm?
- Oh, very warm.
839
01:15:37,079 --> 01:15:39,999
- Is it this, Flesh?
- No, that's not it.
840
01:15:43,502 --> 01:15:55,723
♪♪
841
01:15:59,769 --> 01:16:02,480
Give me that jewel.
842
01:16:04,774 --> 01:16:06,692
Give me that jewel
this minute, do ya hear?
843
01:16:06,776 --> 01:16:08,402
- Ah, I can't, it's stuck.
844
01:16:08,486 --> 01:16:10,112
- What do you mean, it's stuck?
845
01:16:10,196 --> 01:16:11,781
Gimme that jewel!
846
01:16:13,407 --> 01:16:14,700
- I can't!
847
01:16:14,784 --> 01:16:17,995
- Idiot, you thought you could defy me,
848
01:16:18,079 --> 01:16:21,665
but you have yet to
tangle with my rapist robots.
849
01:16:24,335 --> 01:16:31,467
♪♪
850
01:16:31,550 --> 01:16:33,511
- It's stuck!
851
01:16:33,594 --> 01:16:49,610
♪♪
852
01:16:59,203 --> 01:17:02,331
- Oh, I wish I had a picture of this.
853
01:17:02,414 --> 01:17:04,333
- Give me that jewel
this minute, do ya hear?
854
01:17:06,168 --> 01:17:09,630
- Flesh!
855
01:17:12,049 --> 01:17:20,141
♪♪
856
01:17:20,224 --> 01:17:23,352
- What-a-way to go, eh, Earthman?
857
01:17:23,435 --> 01:17:27,273
In a flash of mechanical ecstasy.
858
01:17:31,735 --> 01:17:34,155
- Flesh! Flesh!
859
01:17:34,238 --> 01:17:37,616
- Flesh! Flesh!
860
01:17:37,700 --> 01:17:38,951
- Flesh!
861
01:17:42,538 --> 01:17:45,332
No! No!
862
01:17:48,043 --> 01:17:59,805
♪♪
863
01:17:59,889 --> 01:18:02,183
- Fools!
864
01:18:02,266 --> 01:18:04,185
Idiots!
865
01:18:06,770 --> 01:18:09,106
What do you think you're doing?
866
01:18:09,190 --> 01:18:11,567
- What-a-way to go, hey, Wang?
867
01:18:14,486 --> 01:18:17,948
- You have not heard the last of Wang.
868
01:18:18,032 --> 01:18:31,795
♪♪
869
01:18:31,879 --> 01:18:34,089
- Flesh, come on, we
can't let Wang get away.
870
01:18:34,173 --> 01:18:35,591
- Never mind Wang now,
871
01:18:35,674 --> 01:18:37,718
we have to get the
jewel and save the Earth.
872
01:18:37,801 --> 01:18:39,720
That reminds me...
873
01:18:47,019 --> 01:18:48,354
- Oh, I can't, I can't!
874
01:18:48,437 --> 01:18:50,940
- Spit it out!
875
01:18:51,023 --> 01:18:53,776
- It's stuck!
876
01:19:08,082 --> 01:19:20,344
♪♪
877
01:19:20,427 --> 01:19:25,641
- A plague, a pox, a pestilence of storm!
878
01:19:25,724 --> 01:19:29,979
Anything, anything, oh, Great One!
879
01:19:30,062 --> 01:19:34,400
The fate of all evil rests in your hands!
880
01:19:34,483 --> 01:19:40,239
Arise, arise, and destroy your enemies,
881
01:19:40,322 --> 01:19:44,868
and avenge the glorious
cause of perversion!
882
01:19:44,952 --> 01:20:00,092
♪♪
883
01:20:02,011 --> 01:20:06,223
- Ooh, boy.
884
01:20:06,307 --> 01:20:10,185
I just love murder.
885
01:20:10,269 --> 01:20:12,396
Out of my way, you little fart.
886
01:20:14,815 --> 01:20:23,407
♪♪
887
01:20:23,490 --> 01:20:25,492
A monster's work is never done.
888
01:20:28,245 --> 01:20:30,080
Oh.
889
01:20:32,416 --> 01:20:35,419
Oh, yeah. Mmm-mmm.
890
01:20:35,502 --> 01:20:40,341
♪♪
891
01:20:44,470 --> 01:20:48,140
Oh, fuck.
892
01:20:50,559 --> 01:20:54,188
Stop, look...
893
01:20:54,271 --> 01:20:57,941
listen.
894
01:20:58,025 --> 01:21:01,737
- Too late now, my imbecilic siblings!
895
01:21:01,820 --> 01:21:05,240
The sex ray is too good for your Earth!
896
01:21:05,324 --> 01:21:07,993
I'm going to burn your fucking planet
897
01:21:08,077 --> 01:21:10,454
to a fucking crisp!
898
01:21:10,537 --> 01:21:13,957
♪♪
899
01:21:14,041 --> 01:21:15,584
- Watch your back!
900
01:21:17,169 --> 01:21:19,171
- Well...
901
01:21:19,254 --> 01:21:21,215
Mmm.
902
01:21:22,716 --> 01:21:24,218
How delightful.
903
01:21:30,474 --> 01:21:32,017
- He's got Dale!
904
01:21:32,101 --> 01:21:35,062
- Quick Jerkoff, use the
destructo beam to kill him!
905
01:21:38,857 --> 01:21:41,777
- I dare not, at this
distance there's too great
906
01:21:41,860 --> 01:21:43,904
a risk of hitting Dale.
907
01:21:43,987 --> 01:21:46,532
If only we could get closer.
908
01:21:46,615 --> 01:21:49,868
- Wait a minute, we'll
use Wang's rocket ship.
909
01:21:49,952 --> 01:21:51,912
Come on.
910
01:21:51,995 --> 01:21:55,124
♪♪
911
01:21:55,207 --> 01:21:57,376
- Ah, you and I are
going to be good friends.
912
01:21:57,459 --> 01:21:59,420
Coochie.
913
01:21:59,503 --> 01:22:01,547
♪♪
914
01:22:01,630 --> 01:22:04,466
And...
915
01:22:04,550 --> 01:22:06,552
WOW.
916
01:22:12,182 --> 01:22:15,644
Well, this is the Tower of Murder,
917
01:22:15,727 --> 01:22:17,896
and it's where I hang out.
918
01:22:23,777 --> 01:22:25,821
- Oh, oh, no.
919
01:22:30,033 --> 01:22:32,327
- Are you having a good time?
920
01:22:32,411 --> 01:22:39,251
♪♪
921
01:22:39,334 --> 01:22:41,211
- Come on, Jerkoff.
922
01:22:43,672 --> 01:22:45,299
- Ooh, Flesh!
923
01:22:45,382 --> 01:22:47,509
Flesh, save me.
924
01:22:47,593 --> 01:22:49,428
- God, it's high.
925
01:22:49,511 --> 01:22:53,891
♪♪
926
01:22:53,974 --> 01:22:56,018
Hmm.
927
01:23:01,398 --> 01:23:03,317
Yes, you're incredible.
928
01:23:03,400 --> 01:23:05,736
I wonder how you'd look in black...
929
01:23:05,819 --> 01:23:09,573
nylons.
930
01:23:09,656 --> 01:23:14,661
What do you think of that, hmm?
931
01:23:14,745 --> 01:23:17,122
Hmm? Huh?
932
01:23:22,628 --> 01:23:25,172
Oh...
933
01:23:25,255 --> 01:23:29,009
Hmm-hmm.
934
01:23:32,763 --> 01:23:35,349
Hmm-hmm.
935
01:23:38,227 --> 01:23:42,689
♪♪
936
01:23:42,773 --> 01:23:47,694
I just want to look at your tits.
937
01:23:50,280 --> 01:23:52,324
- There she is, doc.
938
01:23:52,407 --> 01:23:57,246
♪♪
939
01:24:05,212 --> 01:24:07,381
- Hey, they're getting serious.
940
01:24:10,509 --> 01:24:11,885
- Okay, doc, get ready.
941
01:24:11,969 --> 01:24:14,054
- Ready, Flesh.
942
01:24:14,137 --> 01:24:15,514
- Fire!
943
01:24:19,768 --> 01:24:21,103
Doc, you missed!
944
01:24:21,186 --> 01:24:23,105
- I know I missed. I'll get him.
945
01:24:25,065 --> 01:24:27,943
- Well, I never.
946
01:24:28,026 --> 01:24:38,912
♪♪
947
01:24:38,996 --> 01:24:41,123
Up yours, Gordon.
948
01:24:46,461 --> 01:24:52,134
Oh, wow, uhf, pain.
949
01:24:52,217 --> 01:24:53,760
- Monster!
950
01:24:53,844 --> 01:24:57,014
- And now, you get...
951
01:24:57,097 --> 01:24:59,391
yours.
952
01:25:01,268 --> 01:25:03,353
- Get away.
953
01:25:10,986 --> 01:25:13,405
- My ass.
954
01:25:21,288 --> 01:25:23,582
My ass.
955
01:25:33,550 --> 01:25:37,179
Pain, humiliation. Hemorrhoids.
956
01:25:37,262 --> 01:25:40,849
♪♪
957
01:25:47,105 --> 01:25:50,442
- Dale, are you all right?
- Oh, Flesh.
958
01:25:50,525 --> 01:25:53,528
- Gordon.
959
01:26:03,830 --> 01:26:06,166
- Let's do it fast, Flesh!
960
01:26:06,249 --> 01:26:09,294
- For this you'll pay.
961
01:26:09,378 --> 01:26:12,964
No one burns my ass
and lives to get laid.
962
01:26:16,259 --> 01:26:17,844
Oh, shit!
963
01:26:40,701 --> 01:26:55,298
♪♪
63169
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