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1
00:00:01,376 --> 00:00:02,878
DETECTIVE WILLIAMS:
Oh shit.
2
00:00:02,878 --> 00:00:05,088
I'm sittin' here looking
at timestamped photos
3
00:00:05,088 --> 00:00:06,757
of the Dimases
4
00:00:06,757 --> 00:00:09,343
outside before the fire alarm
even went off!
5
00:00:09,343 --> 00:00:10,344
‐ Oh god.
6
00:00:10,344 --> 00:00:12,221
There may still be a murderer
in the building.
7
00:00:12,221 --> 00:00:14,264
‐ You mean my girlfriend was right?
8
00:00:14,264 --> 00:00:17,809
‐ I don't know, you guys. Don't you
think it feels a little too easy?
9
00:00:17,809 --> 00:00:19,686
I'd take another look at Howard.
10
00:00:19,686 --> 00:00:23,065
OLIVER:
Tim did not die because of a cat, Jan!
11
00:00:23,065 --> 00:00:26,068
‐ Jan, we kinda worked on
this as a team together.
12
00:00:26,485 --> 00:00:28,278
‐ And I'm not on the team.
13
00:00:28,278 --> 00:00:30,572
‐ Well, I wouldn't put it like that.
‐ Oh, I would.
14
00:00:30,572 --> 00:00:32,115
♪
15
00:00:32,115 --> 00:00:33,283
‐ No, no, you have great ideas!
16
00:00:33,283 --> 00:00:34,952
‐ Charles, let her go! We're on the clock!
17
00:00:34,952 --> 00:00:36,078
‐ What is wrong with you?
18
00:00:36,578 --> 00:00:37,704
MABEL:
Is it cancer?
19
00:00:37,704 --> 00:00:39,998
‐ It's anxiety. It happens
sometimes when I talk to people.
20
00:00:40,874 --> 00:00:42,668
They're cleaning out Tim Kono's
apartment tomorrow,
21
00:00:42,668 --> 00:00:45,504
so we're gonna look around
for clues before everything's gone.
22
00:00:45,504 --> 00:00:48,298
‐ Sex toys! We got sex toys, people!
23
00:00:48,298 --> 00:00:51,134
Remember not to judge. There's nothing‐‐
nothing shameful about...
24
00:00:51,134 --> 00:00:53,011
deviant sexual pursuits.
25
00:00:55,931 --> 00:00:57,432
[knocking]
26
00:01:00,352 --> 00:01:01,770
Jan!
27
00:01:03,272 --> 00:01:05,941
Jan! J‐‐ Help!
28
00:01:05,941 --> 00:01:07,484
Anybody! Help!
29
00:01:10,821 --> 00:01:13,824
♪ mournful bassoon playing ♪
30
00:01:19,872 --> 00:01:22,082
♪ continues ♪
31
00:01:22,082 --> 00:01:25,502
JAN: New York in winter
is no friend of the bassoon.
32
00:01:28,547 --> 00:01:31,300
A cold instrument will go flat on you.
33
00:01:31,300 --> 00:01:34,136
♪
34
00:01:34,136 --> 00:01:35,470
[quiet siren]
35
00:01:35,470 --> 00:01:38,765
It takes extra time
and care to warm her up.
36
00:01:38,765 --> 00:01:41,268
To make her feel comfortable
in your hands again.
37
00:01:41,268 --> 00:01:42,561
‐ Jan! We're getting help!
38
00:01:42,561 --> 00:01:44,855
Help! Anybody! We're getting help...
39
00:01:46,356 --> 00:01:49,693
JAN: I've avoided giving
my bassoon a name, like Betty,
40
00:01:50,194 --> 00:01:53,447
preferring to think of her
as a beautiful stranger.
41
00:01:55,657 --> 00:01:58,744
To make it special
every time I pick her up.
42
00:01:59,745 --> 00:02:02,247
Like we're meeting for the first time.
43
00:02:05,751 --> 00:02:08,295
Learning if we might play
well with each other,
44
00:02:08,754 --> 00:02:11,256
if we might work as one,
45
00:02:11,256 --> 00:02:13,842
which is the only way it can work.
46
00:02:15,552 --> 00:02:18,555
♪ continues playing ♪
47
00:02:23,435 --> 00:02:25,437
♪ ends ♪
48
00:02:26,146 --> 00:02:27,981
[Jan winces]
49
00:02:27,981 --> 00:02:30,234
‐ Don't adjust without my help.
50
00:02:30,234 --> 00:02:31,985
‐ I'm fine.
51
00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:35,239
‐ You're wincing. I can see you wince.
52
00:02:35,239 --> 00:02:37,241
There's no way you can
play a concert tomorrow.
53
00:02:37,241 --> 00:02:39,826
‐ All I have to do is sit.
54
00:02:39,826 --> 00:02:41,286
And blow.
55
00:02:42,621 --> 00:02:44,081
No comment on that?
56
00:02:44,081 --> 00:02:46,250
‐ I mean, I enjoyed hearing you say it.
57
00:02:46,250 --> 00:02:47,876
‐ [giggles] Ow.
58
00:02:47,876 --> 00:02:50,420
‐ You know, I want to kill
whoever did this to you.
59
00:02:50,420 --> 00:02:53,674
If it was Howard the cat guy,
who you tried to remind us of,
60
00:02:53,674 --> 00:02:57,469
I want to snap his leg off
like I snapped off his cat's leg.
61
00:02:58,095 --> 00:03:00,681
‐ I don't know that story. That's hot.
62
00:03:00,681 --> 00:03:03,392
‐ You know, you should've
mentioned Howard to the cops.
63
00:03:03,392 --> 00:03:05,602
‐ You need some proof to do that,
64
00:03:05,602 --> 00:03:08,272
and I never saw the person.
‐ Yeah.
65
00:03:08,272 --> 00:03:11,441
I can't believe I let
myself get distracted.
66
00:03:11,441 --> 00:03:15,070
First, by Oliver
and his idiot Sting theory,
67
00:03:15,070 --> 00:03:16,822
and then by Mabel,
68
00:03:16,822 --> 00:03:18,907
and the jewels, and the Dimases.
69
00:03:18,907 --> 00:03:21,285
‐ Well, you guys did solve one murder.
70
00:03:22,077 --> 00:03:23,579
Just not Tim Kono.
71
00:03:25,122 --> 00:03:27,332
‐ You could've been killed.
72
00:03:27,332 --> 00:03:30,335
All because they had
to rush out a podcast.
73
00:03:31,295 --> 00:03:32,796
You know...
74
00:03:33,964 --> 00:03:35,883
I need to tell them I'm out.
75
00:03:35,883 --> 00:03:39,344
And, you know, cutting people
loose is not one of my things.
76
00:03:40,262 --> 00:03:43,599
Mabel's gonna be looking at me with
those damn cocker spaniel eyes.
77
00:03:44,057 --> 00:03:45,642
‐ Look, I support what you want,
78
00:03:45,642 --> 00:03:48,520
but this means a lot to you. They do.
79
00:03:49,062 --> 00:03:50,856
‐ They do.
80
00:03:50,856 --> 00:03:52,858
Well, at least one of 'em does.
81
00:03:55,944 --> 00:03:57,362
But you mean more.
82
00:03:57,905 --> 00:04:00,073
[inhales]
[phone ringing]
83
00:04:03,744 --> 00:04:05,287
[ringing]
CHARLES: You know what?
84
00:04:05,287 --> 00:04:08,123
I want to take you away from this building
to some place sunny.
85
00:04:08,123 --> 00:04:09,333
You know, I can get tan,
86
00:04:09,333 --> 00:04:12,127
although I turn sort of a,
you know, pinkish‐lavender.
87
00:04:12,127 --> 00:04:14,463
[Jan laughs]
[ringing, picks up]
88
00:04:14,463 --> 00:04:15,964
‐ Lester?
89
00:04:17,049 --> 00:04:18,091
Now?
90
00:04:18,717 --> 00:04:21,345
Okay, fine...
91
00:04:21,345 --> 00:04:22,596
[hangs up]
92
00:04:22,596 --> 00:04:24,306
JAN:
Is‐‐ Someone's coming up?
93
00:04:24,306 --> 00:04:26,767
‐ Pataki, my stunt double from Brazzos.
94
00:04:26,767 --> 00:04:29,937
‐ Your stunt double from
20 years ago just pops over?
95
00:04:29,937 --> 00:04:32,981
‐ Yeah, it's a thing. Pataki makes it
a point to stop by every year
96
00:04:32,981 --> 00:04:36,235
when the big stunt awards are in town,
like we're still best buds.
97
00:04:36,235 --> 00:04:37,528
I forgot it was this week.
98
00:04:37,528 --> 00:04:39,655
‐ Well, nice to stay connected.
CHARLES: No.
99
00:04:39,655 --> 00:04:42,950
Bad timing, which is also a Pataki thing.
100
00:04:42,950 --> 00:04:45,869
We have kind of a complicated history,
but I'm gonna make this go away.
101
00:04:49,289 --> 00:04:52,543
[Pataki and Charles yelling]
102
00:04:52,543 --> 00:04:54,336
[both laugh]
PATAKI: Savage!
103
00:04:54,336 --> 00:04:56,713
[laughter]
CHARLES: Whoa!
104
00:04:56,713 --> 00:04:58,215
[both laugh]
105
00:04:59,258 --> 00:05:02,302
‐ Well. Who do we have here?
106
00:05:02,302 --> 00:05:05,305
♪ lively theme song playing ♪
107
00:05:05,305 --> 00:05:08,308
♪ vocalizing ♪
108
00:05:52,019 --> 00:05:54,646
OLIVER [on podcast]:
We here at Only Murders in the Building
109
00:05:54,646 --> 00:05:57,441
want to issue just a quick correction
110
00:05:57,441 --> 00:05:59,234
regarding last week's episode.
111
00:05:59,234 --> 00:06:01,778
We now know the true killer of Tim Kono
112
00:06:01,778 --> 00:06:04,448
was not Teddy or Theo Dimas.
113
00:06:04,448 --> 00:06:05,908
So, you know, just...
114
00:06:05,908 --> 00:06:08,535
forget about that. [nervous laugh]
115
00:06:08,535 --> 00:06:10,412
That's what they call a retraction
116
00:06:10,412 --> 00:06:13,248
in the high halls of
journalistic integrity.
117
00:06:13,248 --> 00:06:15,584
All part of the thrill of being
118
00:06:15,584 --> 00:06:19,171
the first investigative podcast
to publish as we go.
119
00:06:19,171 --> 00:06:20,797
The good news is
120
00:06:20,797 --> 00:06:23,675
this means last week's
episode was not our finale.
121
00:06:24,343 --> 00:06:27,804
And we can all still enjoy
the fine dips and wraps
122
00:06:27,804 --> 00:06:30,265
from Dimas Delis, safe in the knowledge
123
00:06:30,265 --> 00:06:33,769
that the owners haven't murdered
anyone in the last few months.
124
00:06:35,729 --> 00:06:38,899
‐ Am I the only one happy the Dimases got
accused of something they didn't do?
125
00:06:39,733 --> 00:06:41,568
Back at you, fuckers.
126
00:06:41,568 --> 00:06:44,571
‐ I like it, too, but who killed Tim?
127
00:06:45,489 --> 00:06:48,575
I mean, there was a note on Jan's
door before she got stabbed.
128
00:06:48,575 --> 00:06:52,079
There was a note on Oliver's door
before his dog got poisoned.
129
00:06:52,079 --> 00:06:55,082
So what, there's just this
person running around
130
00:06:55,082 --> 00:06:58,168
leaving notes, poisoning,
and stabbing, and...
131
00:07:00,629 --> 00:07:01,672
Wait, did you just...
132
00:07:02,089 --> 00:07:03,465
‐ Yeah, it took you long enough.
133
00:07:03,841 --> 00:07:04,883
‐ Hm.
134
00:07:05,342 --> 00:07:07,678
‐ I had to clean it up.
My dad's taking me upstate
135
00:07:07,678 --> 00:07:10,681
to meet this lawyer who says
he can help me get my name cleared.
136
00:07:11,807 --> 00:07:12,850
All thanks to you.
137
00:07:13,308 --> 00:07:14,810
‐ I don't know if I like it.
138
00:07:15,853 --> 00:07:18,355
[laughs] Why don't we see?
‐ Yeah.
139
00:07:21,149 --> 00:07:23,193
Do you like it? Yeah?
‐ I like it.
140
00:07:23,610 --> 00:07:25,028
I like it.
141
00:07:27,155 --> 00:07:28,657
[elevator dings]
142
00:07:28,657 --> 00:07:30,158
[sighs]
143
00:07:31,994 --> 00:07:34,788
[elevator doors shut]
144
00:07:34,788 --> 00:07:35,789
[drops box]
145
00:07:41,795 --> 00:07:44,423
‐ Okay... [sighs]
146
00:07:44,423 --> 00:07:47,718
‐ So, for the next six hours,
I'm fightin' off a live gator
147
00:07:47,718 --> 00:07:49,553
with a broken‐off bourbon bottle,
148
00:07:49,553 --> 00:07:51,972
and this guy's complaining about
a sunburn he got on an airboat.
149
00:07:51,972 --> 00:07:54,474
I can't believe he didn't
tell you this story.
150
00:07:54,474 --> 00:07:57,227
‐ Well, we've only known
each other a few weeks,
151
00:07:57,227 --> 00:07:59,897
and half that time, I've been recovering
152
00:07:59,897 --> 00:08:02,024
from an assault/stabbing.
153
00:08:02,024 --> 00:08:04,484
‐ Oh, adorable.
154
00:08:04,484 --> 00:08:06,820
So you two are freshly in lurrrve,
155
00:08:06,820 --> 00:08:09,156
mm? Learning each other's foibles,
156
00:08:09,156 --> 00:08:12,075
discovering what makes the other climax.
157
00:08:12,075 --> 00:08:15,913
And you're getting with him right as
he's heating up, what with this podcast.
158
00:08:15,913 --> 00:08:17,789
‐ I don't know about "heating up."
PATAKI: Hey, hey.
159
00:08:18,290 --> 00:08:20,918
I've been listening, okay?
I saw you on Fallon.
160
00:08:20,918 --> 00:08:23,420
You are about to get Tarantino'd, man!
161
00:08:23,420 --> 00:08:25,088
And you're gonna need me
162
00:08:25,088 --> 00:08:26,548
by your side for the resurgence.
163
00:08:26,548 --> 00:08:28,467
[squeaky horn ringtone]
164
00:08:28,467 --> 00:08:30,802
Ah. Fuckaroonies, it's my agent.
165
00:08:30,802 --> 00:08:33,096
[ringtone continues]
I have to take this.
166
00:08:33,096 --> 00:08:34,097
Hello, Sy.
167
00:08:34,097 --> 00:08:35,307
Mm‐hmm.
168
00:08:36,308 --> 00:08:39,728
Yeah, I'm with him right now.
He looks great! Mwah!
169
00:08:39,728 --> 00:08:40,604
[both chuckle]
170
00:08:40,604 --> 00:08:43,190
Probably gonna have to
age me up just a little bit.
171
00:08:43,190 --> 00:08:45,776
Yeah, some jowls, some eye stuff,
and then we're good to go.
172
00:08:45,776 --> 00:08:47,945
Okay. Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah.
173
00:08:47,945 --> 00:08:50,113
Hey, listen, um, I gotta talk
to him about my next gig.
174
00:08:50,113 --> 00:08:53,242
I'm doubling for Tilda Swinton.
Hm. Can I, uh...
175
00:08:53,242 --> 00:08:54,868
‐ Yeah, you can take it in the next room.
176
00:08:54,868 --> 00:08:58,664
‐ Oh! Tilda's shoulder, hip measurement?
Exact same as yours.
177
00:08:58,664 --> 00:09:01,667
Hey, Jan, you think you could, uh,
rustle up a little coffee? [clicks tongue]
178
00:09:03,085 --> 00:09:05,546
‐ [laughs] She's kind of a kick.
179
00:09:05,546 --> 00:09:07,214
‐ Yeah, everybody loves Sazz.
180
00:09:07,214 --> 00:09:09,842
‐ Sazz? That's her first name?
181
00:09:09,842 --> 00:09:13,220
‐ Yeah. Sazz was always more
popular than I was on the set,
182
00:09:13,220 --> 00:09:15,430
and she was better
at everything than I was.
183
00:09:15,430 --> 00:09:16,682
‐ I doubt that.
184
00:09:16,682 --> 00:09:19,935
‐ Oh really? Well, ask my ex‐girlfriend,
Cookie, who left me for Sazz.
185
00:09:19,935 --> 00:09:21,144
‐ What?
186
00:09:21,144 --> 00:09:23,897
‐ Yeah, season six. And then,
I had to spend three more seasons with her
187
00:09:23,897 --> 00:09:25,649
while she shacked up with Cookie.
188
00:09:25,649 --> 00:09:27,901
I couldn't fire her 'cause the crew
would hate me.
189
00:09:27,901 --> 00:09:29,820
‐ Well now, I don't like her.
‐ Hm.
190
00:09:29,820 --> 00:09:33,031
‐ I don't want you feeling second
to anyone, Charles‐Haden Savage.
191
00:09:36,076 --> 00:09:37,661
[kiss]
[knocking]
192
00:09:37,661 --> 00:09:39,663
I'll get that.
‐ I'll get the coffee.
193
00:09:44,126 --> 00:09:46,253
‐ Hey, how you feeling?
‐ Oh, better.
194
00:09:46,253 --> 00:09:48,463
I have the best caretaker
looking after me.
195
00:09:48,463 --> 00:09:50,591
‐ Oh, that's so sweet.
196
00:09:50,591 --> 00:09:53,510
Where is that good guy?
[door shuts]
197
00:09:53,510 --> 00:09:54,970
You hear that, Brazzos? You still got it.
198
00:09:54,970 --> 00:09:57,139
Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry.
‐ Ah!
199
00:09:57,139 --> 00:09:58,140
CHARLES:
What up!
200
00:09:58,140 --> 00:09:59,600
‐ Ah! The fuck?
‐ Ah!
201
00:09:59,600 --> 00:10:01,393
‐ My stunt double from Brazzos.
202
00:10:01,393 --> 00:10:04,062
‐ Sazz Pataki. Happens all the time.
203
00:10:04,062 --> 00:10:06,064
‐ Oh, you're...
204
00:10:06,064 --> 00:10:08,233
Wow, that's pretty progressive
for the early '90s.
205
00:10:08,233 --> 00:10:09,943
‐ Yeah, well, I've been
called a groundbreaker,
206
00:10:09,943 --> 00:10:11,862
among other things. [laughs]
207
00:10:11,862 --> 00:10:14,198
‐ A stuntwoman. That's badass.
208
00:10:14,198 --> 00:10:15,782
‐ I did some of my own stunts.
209
00:10:15,782 --> 00:10:17,034
‐ Yeah, you rode a bike.
210
00:10:17,576 --> 00:10:20,662
‐ [sighs] Mm. Anybody want coffee?
211
00:10:20,662 --> 00:10:22,080
‐ Uh, sure.
‐ Yeah, I guess.
212
00:10:22,080 --> 00:10:24,041
‐ [knocking]
JAN: I got it.
213
00:10:24,041 --> 00:10:27,085
‐ You know, I've been looking
at your, uh, beautiful mind
214
00:10:27,085 --> 00:10:28,629
situation back there.
215
00:10:28,629 --> 00:10:30,672
I have some thoughts.
216
00:10:30,672 --> 00:10:31,882
MABEL:
Hm.
217
00:10:33,425 --> 00:10:35,511
‐ So, Bunny's a fuckface.
218
00:10:35,511 --> 00:10:38,388
Oh! Hey, Jan. How's your back?
219
00:10:38,388 --> 00:10:40,849
‐ Oh, better if I hunch.
‐ Oh, terrific.
220
00:10:40,849 --> 00:10:44,311
Got a little kerfuffle
at my place. [grunts]
221
00:10:44,311 --> 00:10:45,771
Bunny changed the locks on me
222
00:10:45,771 --> 00:10:47,773
but she let me back in
to grab a few things.
223
00:10:47,773 --> 00:10:51,026
Obviously, I'm not moving
in permanently. Is he here?
224
00:10:51,026 --> 00:10:53,529
‐ He's in there.
‐ Alright.
225
00:10:53,529 --> 00:10:55,447
Charles! I need to camp‐‐
226
00:10:56,698 --> 00:10:58,742
Okay.
227
00:10:58,742 --> 00:11:01,828
I don't know what work you've had done,
228
00:11:01,828 --> 00:11:03,288
but it's too much,
229
00:11:03,288 --> 00:11:05,666
and that is not the response
you first want.
230
00:11:09,628 --> 00:11:11,588
Is that filler?
CHARLES: I'm over here.
231
00:11:11,588 --> 00:11:12,589
[screams]
232
00:11:13,674 --> 00:11:16,093
‐ What the... [panting]
233
00:11:16,093 --> 00:11:17,511
What is this, Face/Off?
234
00:11:17,511 --> 00:11:20,806
♪
235
00:11:20,806 --> 00:11:23,725
‐ How any of this connects
to whoever stabbed Jan,
236
00:11:23,725 --> 00:11:26,061
if it's Howard,
237
00:11:26,061 --> 00:11:28,605
I just don't get this yet.
OLIVER: Well, look,
238
00:11:28,605 --> 00:11:30,732
we know that Tim threatened
Howard with a gun
239
00:11:30,732 --> 00:11:33,569
because his cat kept going
into Tim's apartment.
240
00:11:33,569 --> 00:11:35,153
What if‐‐ W‐w‐what if we s‐‐
PATAKI: Gang.
241
00:11:35,696 --> 00:11:38,156
Might I offer up a notion here?
242
00:11:38,156 --> 00:11:39,950
You're missing one very big thing.
243
00:11:40,534 --> 00:11:41,952
Motive.
244
00:11:41,952 --> 00:11:43,745
This was a crime of passion.
245
00:11:43,745 --> 00:11:45,581
Tim Kono was drugged,
246
00:11:45,581 --> 00:11:47,082
then shot.
247
00:11:47,082 --> 00:11:49,668
Well, that requires premeditation.
248
00:11:49,668 --> 00:11:52,045
Romantic fury. The desire
to see someone suffer
249
00:11:52,045 --> 00:11:53,922
before you blow their brains out!
250
00:11:54,381 --> 00:11:56,550
‐ Huh. Okay, yeah...
‐ Interesting...
251
00:11:56,550 --> 00:11:58,302
‐ Fascinating,
but the cops are on this now,
252
00:11:58,302 --> 00:12:00,179
and our track record is lousy.
‐ Sazz,
253
00:12:00,179 --> 00:12:01,638
can I show you the suicide notes?
254
00:12:01,638 --> 00:12:03,182
‐ Bring 'em on, hon.
255
00:12:03,599 --> 00:12:04,683
‐ Uh,
256
00:12:04,683 --> 00:12:07,603
I'd like to point out that
when I offered to help,
257
00:12:07,603 --> 00:12:09,980
everyone sent me home to get stabbed.
258
00:12:09,980 --> 00:12:12,024
‐ Sazz is a stunt double, Jan.
259
00:12:12,024 --> 00:12:13,984
I think she knows
what she's talking about.
260
00:12:13,984 --> 00:12:15,152
PATAKI: And here it is.
261
00:12:15,152 --> 00:12:17,779
"I'm just tired of feeling lonely."
262
00:12:17,779 --> 00:12:21,325
Might I offer that is not what
you write to cover a suicide.
263
00:12:21,325 --> 00:12:23,493
You use words like "I want to die."
264
00:12:23,493 --> 00:12:25,871
This is an accidental confession
265
00:12:25,871 --> 00:12:28,957
from a lovelorn murderer.
OLIVER: I am riveted.
266
00:12:29,458 --> 00:12:31,960
She's so the better you.
‐ So impressive.
267
00:12:31,960 --> 00:12:33,545
‐ Oh, and what are these? Lookie here.
268
00:12:33,545 --> 00:12:37,132
Cocktail glasses from the garbage
the night of the murder?
269
00:12:37,132 --> 00:12:38,091
[sniffs]
270
00:12:38,884 --> 00:12:42,137
Oh, so Tim was just enjoying
a nice, smooth bourbon
271
00:12:42,137 --> 00:12:43,514
[sniffs] with his killer?
272
00:12:43,514 --> 00:12:45,724
‐ We saw those. We just...
273
00:12:45,724 --> 00:12:47,351
I think they made me thirsty.
274
00:12:47,351 --> 00:12:49,144
‐ Yeah, I'll bet you a hunsky
they come back positive
275
00:12:49,144 --> 00:12:50,812
for the poison that killed Tim.
276
00:12:50,812 --> 00:12:53,315
You find the person in love with Tim,
277
00:12:53,315 --> 00:12:54,733
you've found your murderer.
278
00:12:54,733 --> 00:12:58,195
‐ We never found any evidence that Tim
was seeing anyone. I just don't get that.
279
00:12:58,195 --> 00:13:00,405
‐ Well, that's because it involves
an understanding of passion.
280
00:13:00,405 --> 00:13:01,823
‐ Excuse me?
‐ Hey, no offense.
281
00:13:01,823 --> 00:13:04,660
You're just not a guy who's
ever let himself get swept away.
282
00:13:04,660 --> 00:13:06,870
‐ Oh, that's true.
‐ Oh, who told you that? Cookie?
283
00:13:06,870 --> 00:13:09,957
Because it turns out I can be very
passionate with the right person.
284
00:13:09,957 --> 00:13:11,458
‐ Oh!
‐ Oh, sorry!
285
00:13:11,458 --> 00:13:14,419
‐ Okay, guys, I‐I‐I'm loving all this.
286
00:13:14,419 --> 00:13:17,339
Really into it,
but I'm currently homeless,
287
00:13:17,339 --> 00:13:20,175
and the only way I'm gonna
get my place back
288
00:13:20,175 --> 00:13:21,802
is if I beat Bunny
289
00:13:21,802 --> 00:13:24,137
at her own building meeting today.
290
00:13:24,137 --> 00:13:26,682
‐ Yeah, and how are you gonna do that?
‐ Take back the story.
291
00:13:26,682 --> 00:13:28,600
You know, she's doing this
negative spin on everything,
292
00:13:28,600 --> 00:13:31,603
but‐but we're the heroes of this building.
293
00:13:31,603 --> 00:13:34,690
Before us, you could be
killed in your own apartment,
294
00:13:34,690 --> 00:13:35,941
and no one would know it.
295
00:13:35,941 --> 00:13:39,194
‐ I can't leave Jan here alone.
PATAKI: I'll keep watch for you, pal.
296
00:13:39,194 --> 00:13:41,071
Just like the old days, right?
297
00:13:41,071 --> 00:13:42,155
♪
298
00:13:42,155 --> 00:13:43,991
‐ You go. I'm okay. [kiss]
299
00:13:45,075 --> 00:13:47,077
[kissing]
300
00:13:49,079 --> 00:13:51,498
[lobby chatter]
301
00:13:51,498 --> 00:13:53,876
MABEL: Whoa. Look at all these cops.
OSCAR: Yeah.
302
00:13:53,876 --> 00:13:57,337
Nothing more calming after 10 years of
lockup than your home swarming with blue.
303
00:13:57,337 --> 00:14:01,175
‐ Yes, but this should make everyone
feel good. The pros are on it now.
304
00:14:01,175 --> 00:14:04,303
‐ And by pros, you mean the people who
missed everything the amateurs found?
305
00:14:06,054 --> 00:14:08,891
‐ There he is. Howard Morris.
306
00:14:08,891 --> 00:14:10,684
I may hurt him.
307
00:14:10,684 --> 00:14:13,687
Or at least speak to him firmly.
308
00:14:13,687 --> 00:14:16,440
‐ That's the guy you think
is a hardcore murderer?
309
00:14:16,440 --> 00:14:19,026
Dude's covered in cat hair.
BUNNY: Okay, people.
310
00:14:19,026 --> 00:14:22,112
Mouths closed! Keisters down!
[police radio chatter]
311
00:14:22,696 --> 00:14:24,656
Lots to discuss!
312
00:14:26,783 --> 00:14:28,577
First...
313
00:14:28,577 --> 00:14:32,539
Tim Kono's death has now
been ruled a homicide,
314
00:14:32,539 --> 00:14:35,584
and, apparently,
one of you jerk‐offs did it.
315
00:14:35,584 --> 00:14:36,835
[murmuring]
316
00:14:36,835 --> 00:14:39,379
Also, the tenants in 14C,
317
00:14:39,379 --> 00:14:42,049
12E, and 10D
318
00:14:42,049 --> 00:14:44,218
have violated our privacy and home
319
00:14:44,218 --> 00:14:47,721
by making us all characters in a podcast.
320
00:14:47,721 --> 00:14:50,057
‐ Yeah, a podcast, by the way,
321
00:14:50,057 --> 00:14:52,684
that revealed a murderer in the building,
322
00:14:52,684 --> 00:14:55,229
which I‐I'm sure the rest
of you all appreciate.
323
00:14:55,229 --> 00:14:58,774
And for any fans, I do have
324
00:14:58,774 --> 00:15:00,734
some officially licensed
325
00:15:00,734 --> 00:15:03,403
tie‐dye sweatshirts, uh...
326
00:15:03,403 --> 00:15:06,365
if interested. And only 49.99.
327
00:15:06,365 --> 00:15:08,158
[chattering]
Somewhat reasonable, I think.
328
00:15:08,158 --> 00:15:10,202
Very slimming, as you can see.
329
00:15:10,202 --> 00:15:12,579
‐ I bought a 12‐pound
brisket for a dinner party,
330
00:15:12,579 --> 00:15:15,832
and now no one wants to come
because we're the "murder building."
331
00:15:15,832 --> 00:15:18,252
What am I supposed to do
with my brisket now, Brazzos?
332
00:15:18,252 --> 00:15:21,380
‐ [sighs]
I mean, sandwiches?
333
00:15:21,380 --> 00:15:24,049
‐ Is anyone else thinking
how smart it would be
334
00:15:24,049 --> 00:15:27,469
for the murderer to
investigate the murder?
335
00:15:27,469 --> 00:15:28,971
I'm talking about you, Whitey.
336
00:15:28,971 --> 00:15:31,098
‐ Yeah, I think I'm getting that.
337
00:15:31,098 --> 00:15:33,475
‐ I've had four clients
cancel therapy this week
338
00:15:33,475 --> 00:15:34,852
because they're afraid to come here.
339
00:15:34,852 --> 00:15:36,854
That lost revenue is on you.
340
00:15:36,854 --> 00:15:39,523
‐ My kids are too scared
to sleep in their own rooms.
341
00:15:39,523 --> 00:15:41,149
So now, I share my bed with people
342
00:15:41,149 --> 00:15:43,110
who are actively shitting themselves.
343
00:15:43,110 --> 00:15:46,738
‐ Well, sometimes you do have
to make a mess to clean one up.
344
00:15:46,738 --> 00:15:49,449
‐ Don't worry, folks. We're done.
345
00:15:50,367 --> 00:15:51,577
[Oliver and Mabel whispering]
346
00:15:51,577 --> 00:15:53,579
This is getting way too messy!
347
00:15:53,579 --> 00:15:55,581
So, yes, the podcast
348
00:15:55,581 --> 00:15:58,000
and the investigations are over.
349
00:15:58,000 --> 00:16:01,879
All will be back to normal hopefully soon.
350
00:16:01,879 --> 00:16:03,463
[indistinct]
[applause]
351
00:16:03,463 --> 00:16:05,674
I know‐‐ I'll talk about it later!
‐ You can't make that‐‐
352
00:16:05,674 --> 00:16:08,552
‐ It's a little late for that.
353
00:16:08,552 --> 00:16:10,637
As per the building's bylaws,
354
00:16:10,637 --> 00:16:12,848
if eight or more tenants file complaints
355
00:16:12,848 --> 00:16:15,601
against another tenant,
they can be evicted.
356
00:16:15,601 --> 00:16:18,353
We've already taken action on 10D,
357
00:16:18,353 --> 00:16:22,107
but perhaps we should take
a vote on 12E and 14C?
358
00:16:22,107 --> 00:16:24,693
‐ Wait! What?
359
00:16:24,693 --> 00:16:26,403
‐ You can't evict my aunt.
360
00:16:26,403 --> 00:16:29,031
‐ No. Just you.
361
00:16:29,031 --> 00:16:32,201
By a show of hands,
who here thinks our building
362
00:16:32,201 --> 00:16:34,620
would be better off without
these three fuckwads?
363
00:16:36,121 --> 00:16:39,958
‐ Hey!
‐ I, for one, am actually...
364
00:16:39,958 --> 00:16:41,293
grateful to the fuckwads.
365
00:16:42,377 --> 00:16:45,005
Their work might lead to my answer.
366
00:16:45,547 --> 00:16:48,467
A toxicology report came
back on my beloved cat,
367
00:16:48,467 --> 00:16:49,968
and Evelyn was poisoned.
368
00:16:49,968 --> 00:16:51,053
[tenants gasping]
369
00:16:51,053 --> 00:16:53,472
With the same poison that killed Tim.
370
00:16:53,472 --> 00:16:55,390
[murmuring]
Mm‐hmm, mm‐hmm.
371
00:16:55,390 --> 00:16:56,725
Furthermore,
372
00:16:56,725 --> 00:16:59,561
one of Evelyn's legs was missing
when I removed her from my freezer,
373
00:17:00,229 --> 00:17:03,273
leading me to believe
that the killer broke in
374
00:17:03,273 --> 00:17:04,816
and tried to steal Evelyn's body
375
00:17:04,816 --> 00:17:06,985
to cover his or her own tracks.
376
00:17:06,985 --> 00:17:09,279
‐ Why would they just take a leg?
377
00:17:09,279 --> 00:17:11,240
‐ Oh, Evelyn had some gams on her.
378
00:17:11,240 --> 00:17:12,449
‐ Howard.
379
00:17:13,909 --> 00:17:15,536
You've had six complaints
380
00:17:15,536 --> 00:17:17,871
about noxious odors coming
from your apartment.
381
00:17:17,871 --> 00:17:19,581
So, if I were you,
382
00:17:19,581 --> 00:17:22,793
I'd keep my head down
and put your hand up.
383
00:17:25,462 --> 00:17:26,964
‐ Don't you bully him, Bunny!
384
00:17:26,964 --> 00:17:30,092
Enough with you and your
New York co‐op power games.
385
00:17:30,092 --> 00:17:31,927
‐ All in favor of evicting
386
00:17:31,927 --> 00:17:34,221
all three members of Murder, She Wrote?
387
00:17:34,221 --> 00:17:35,889
[murmuring]
388
00:17:35,889 --> 00:17:37,224
Terrific! I'll start
389
00:17:37,224 --> 00:17:40,269
the eviction process today.
390
00:17:40,769 --> 00:17:44,147
The rest of you,
if you're a murderer...
391
00:17:45,148 --> 00:17:47,276
stop murdering!
392
00:17:47,276 --> 00:17:49,862
♪
393
00:17:49,862 --> 00:17:53,031
‐ You know what? It's all gonna be
fine once we solve this case.
394
00:17:53,031 --> 00:17:56,118
‐ Stop with the fucking case.
OSCAR: Whoa, you know what?
395
00:17:56,118 --> 00:17:58,871
I'm gonna run errands that
are not in that elevator.
396
00:17:58,871 --> 00:18:02,124
[lobby chatter]
397
00:18:02,124 --> 00:18:05,586
‐ [sighs] Okay,
everybody just take a breath.
398
00:18:05,586 --> 00:18:08,797
Clearly, that didn't go well,
but Oliver is right.
399
00:18:08,797 --> 00:18:11,633
If we find the murderer,
the board will have to reconsider‐‐
400
00:18:11,633 --> 00:18:13,260
‐ You two won't stop.
401
00:18:13,844 --> 00:18:17,014
My girlfriend's been stabbed.
I'm losing my home now?
402
00:18:17,014 --> 00:18:19,141
‐ Buddy, we feel terrible about Jan!
403
00:18:19,141 --> 00:18:22,603
‐ We really do. And we shouldn't
have dismissed her ideas.
404
00:18:22,603 --> 00:18:25,439
‐ And can I tell you something?
The comments from the fans
405
00:18:25,439 --> 00:18:28,358
for her character have
been surprisingly positive.
406
00:18:28,358 --> 00:18:31,236
‐ You're not hearing me. I'm done!
407
00:18:31,236 --> 00:18:34,740
I‐I‐I don't do dangerous things!
That's why I have a stunt double!
408
00:18:34,740 --> 00:18:37,951
I don't like getting hurt, and ever
since you two have been in my life,
409
00:18:37,951 --> 00:18:40,579
I'm surrounded by danger and pain!
410
00:18:40,579 --> 00:18:43,373
‐ As opposed to nothing at all?
411
00:18:43,373 --> 00:18:45,918
‐ Oh. It's mean Mabel,
412
00:18:45,918 --> 00:18:49,379
who clearly has all the answers at 26.
Please do share.
413
00:18:49,379 --> 00:18:51,924
‐ Christ, Charles. Cut the kid a break.
414
00:18:51,924 --> 00:18:54,176
‐ She's not a kid.
415
00:18:54,176 --> 00:18:56,929
We only think she's a kid
because we're old!
416
00:18:56,929 --> 00:18:58,430
And we should've known bett‐‐
417
00:18:58,430 --> 00:19:02,226
You should've known better,
but you rushed into this podcast
418
00:19:02,226 --> 00:19:04,520
headfirst, like you always do,
419
00:19:04,520 --> 00:19:06,813
and you took two more bodies
over the edge with you!
420
00:19:07,564 --> 00:19:09,358
Splash 2!
421
00:19:09,358 --> 00:19:11,485
An Oliver Putnam production!
422
00:19:11,985 --> 00:19:13,904
‐ Well, that was mean.
423
00:19:13,904 --> 00:19:16,865
A great callback, but incredibly mean.
424
00:19:16,865 --> 00:19:18,867
‐ I want you,
425
00:19:18,867 --> 00:19:21,703
and all of your things, out of my place.
426
00:19:21,703 --> 00:19:24,456
All the evidence. I want out. I'm out.
427
00:19:26,708 --> 00:19:28,544
Sorry, I'm not good at confrontation.
428
00:19:28,544 --> 00:19:31,046
‐ Well, that was pretty good to me.
429
00:19:31,046 --> 00:19:33,131
For the record, I'm 28.
430
00:19:33,131 --> 00:19:34,550
[ding, elevator doors open]
431
00:19:34,550 --> 00:19:36,301
♪
432
00:19:36,301 --> 00:19:39,137
‐ I just want to take care of my
injured girlfriend for my final days
433
00:19:39,137 --> 00:19:40,848
in my home of 30 years.
434
00:19:40,848 --> 00:19:42,558
Once my apartment is gone,
435
00:19:42,558 --> 00:19:45,018
she'll be the only good thing in my life.
436
00:19:49,773 --> 00:19:51,108
OLIVER:
Oh mama.
437
00:19:55,904 --> 00:19:58,282
‐ Charles.
‐ Of course.
438
00:19:58,282 --> 00:20:00,909
It's happening again.
Took you less than an hour‐‐
439
00:20:00,909 --> 00:20:02,452
‐ I needed my bandage changed.
440
00:20:03,745 --> 00:20:05,831
What did you think was happening?
441
00:20:08,333 --> 00:20:09,835
‐ That.
442
00:20:09,835 --> 00:20:12,045
‐ I get that Sazz pushes your buttons,
443
00:20:12,045 --> 00:20:14,756
but you really thought I'd cheat on you?
444
00:20:14,756 --> 00:20:17,134
‐ I think anyone great would cheat on me.
445
00:20:18,635 --> 00:20:21,722
The truth is Sazz doubled me
for sex scenes, too.
446
00:20:21,722 --> 00:20:25,225
Apparently, my hip motions
weren't natural,
447
00:20:25,225 --> 00:20:27,102
which I'm sure you noted.
448
00:20:27,102 --> 00:20:29,313
And I just thought, you know,
449
00:20:29,313 --> 00:20:30,856
between that and the stabbing,
450
00:20:30,856 --> 00:20:33,192
you had plenty of reasons
to look elsewhere.
451
00:20:33,192 --> 00:20:35,611
‐ I like your hip motions.
452
00:20:35,611 --> 00:20:38,322
They're surprising.
‐ Then, uh,
453
00:20:38,322 --> 00:20:39,823
why you packing your stuff?
454
00:20:39,823 --> 00:20:42,910
‐ Because I have
a big solo tomorrow night.
455
00:20:42,910 --> 00:20:46,079
Stravinsky's Firebird is
one of those rare pieces
456
00:20:46,079 --> 00:20:48,248
in which a first chair bassoon
457
00:20:48,248 --> 00:20:50,334
really gets to shine.
458
00:20:50,334 --> 00:20:52,336
I'm just gonna stay at my place tonight.
459
00:20:52,336 --> 00:20:53,837
‐ Think that's safe?
460
00:20:53,837 --> 00:20:57,216
‐ I'm a New York broad who's been stabbed.
I can handle shit.
461
00:20:57,216 --> 00:20:59,468
‐ Yeah. Well, again,
462
00:20:59,468 --> 00:21:00,969
I'm really sorry.
463
00:21:00,969 --> 00:21:02,846
‐ I know.
464
00:21:02,846 --> 00:21:05,390
I'm sorry you may be losing your place.
465
00:21:05,390 --> 00:21:08,685
You know, there is something
seriously wrong with Bunny.
466
00:21:08,685 --> 00:21:10,521
Oh! Maybe Bunny is the killer,
467
00:21:10,521 --> 00:21:13,690
and this is her way of
stopping the investigation.
468
00:21:13,690 --> 00:21:14,733
Oh my god, I can't stop.
469
00:21:14,733 --> 00:21:16,985
‐ [laughs] I know the feeling.
470
00:21:17,986 --> 00:21:20,822
Hey, would it be okay if
I came to see you tomorrow?
471
00:21:20,822 --> 00:21:23,408
I mean, after all,
I'm dating the first chair bassoonist
472
00:21:23,408 --> 00:21:25,786
for the Symphony,
and I've never even seen you play.
473
00:21:25,786 --> 00:21:28,205
‐ Oh, I don't know.
474
00:21:28,205 --> 00:21:30,332
Maybe another time.
475
00:21:30,332 --> 00:21:32,251
I‐I think it'd make me too nervous
476
00:21:32,251 --> 00:21:34,294
knowing you were seeing me not at my best.
477
00:21:34,795 --> 00:21:36,797
‐ Okay. Yeah, sure.
478
00:21:36,797 --> 00:21:38,298
‐ Thanks.
479
00:21:39,591 --> 00:21:41,593
I'll call you.
‐ Alright.
480
00:21:46,306 --> 00:21:47,307
[door shuts]
481
00:21:48,433 --> 00:21:51,436
♪ bassoon playing ♪
482
00:21:58,777 --> 00:22:01,780
♪ playing continues ♪
483
00:22:05,659 --> 00:22:08,662
♪ quiet playing ♪
484
00:22:10,706 --> 00:22:12,541
[Oliver sighing]
485
00:22:13,792 --> 00:22:14,793
[sniffs]
486
00:22:17,880 --> 00:22:19,840
‐ Please don't do anything in there.
487
00:22:20,424 --> 00:22:21,884
‐ It's gonna be hard.
488
00:22:21,884 --> 00:22:24,261
It's a pretty arousing setup.
489
00:22:24,261 --> 00:22:27,097
‐ Okay. Good night. [sighs]
490
00:22:29,308 --> 00:22:31,143
[traffic noise]
491
00:22:31,810 --> 00:22:33,812
‐ [inhales] Ow!
492
00:22:34,730 --> 00:22:36,481
Oh dear lord.
493
00:22:36,481 --> 00:22:39,276
[groans] This is gonna take a while.
494
00:22:39,276 --> 00:22:41,486
[sighs, sniffs]
495
00:22:43,906 --> 00:22:45,532
‐ [quietly] Morning.
496
00:22:47,492 --> 00:22:49,536
‐ You look fancy.
497
00:22:49,536 --> 00:22:51,997
‐ Got a hot date with
a prematurely balding lawyer.
498
00:22:51,997 --> 00:22:54,124
I figured innocent people
tuck their shirts in, right?
499
00:22:55,042 --> 00:22:57,044
‐ Got get 'em.
‐ I will.
500
00:22:59,171 --> 00:23:00,839
I'll see you later.
‐ Okay.
501
00:23:00,839 --> 00:23:02,716
[distant siren]
502
00:23:03,717 --> 00:23:06,512
‐ See you, Ollie.
‐ Bye, Oscar. Good luck.
503
00:23:06,512 --> 00:23:08,639
‐ Thanks.
[Oliver sniffs]
504
00:23:08,639 --> 00:23:10,516
[sighs]
[door opens, shuts]
505
00:23:11,725 --> 00:23:13,519
‐ Charles isn't done, by the way.
506
00:23:13,519 --> 00:23:15,312
‐ He seemed pretty over it.
507
00:23:15,312 --> 00:23:17,606
‐ I'm telling you. He's not done.
508
00:23:17,606 --> 00:23:21,235
‐ The only way to fix all of this
is to fucking solve this case.
509
00:23:21,944 --> 00:23:25,405
That's how Tim gets justice,
and we get to keep our apartments.
510
00:23:25,405 --> 00:23:28,283
‐ And that's how I get
the final episode of my dreams.
511
00:23:29,034 --> 00:23:30,869
I‐I want this to be better than
512
00:23:30,869 --> 00:23:33,163
the Jinx guy confessing in the pisser.
513
00:23:34,706 --> 00:23:36,708
You know, I‐I've been thinking about...
514
00:23:37,543 --> 00:23:40,045
Pataki's crime of passion thing.
515
00:23:41,547 --> 00:23:43,799
And, you know, we should not presume
516
00:23:43,799 --> 00:23:46,301
that a lover of Tim's
is necessarily a woman.
517
00:23:47,511 --> 00:23:50,973
Do you think his sex toys
could reveal anything?
518
00:23:52,432 --> 00:23:54,643
‐ Oh no.
‐ Like a...
519
00:23:54,643 --> 00:23:55,853
[laughs]
520
00:23:55,853 --> 00:23:57,187
Girl guy? Guy guy?
521
00:23:57,187 --> 00:23:59,314
They them? They girl?
522
00:23:59,314 --> 00:24:00,482
Guy them?
523
00:24:00,482 --> 00:24:04,361
‐ Look, all I know is that it goes
into a hole somewhere, so...
524
00:24:04,361 --> 00:24:07,364
Okay, alright. Let's just
start at the very beginning.
525
00:24:07,364 --> 00:24:08,448
♪
526
00:24:08,448 --> 00:24:10,450
I got in the elevator
with these two weirdos,
527
00:24:10,450 --> 00:24:12,536
and I was rocking this
awesome yellow fur coat.
528
00:24:12,536 --> 00:24:14,371
‐ Really popped on you, by the way.
[elevator dings]
529
00:24:14,371 --> 00:24:16,874
[doors rumbling]
530
00:24:17,416 --> 00:24:19,376
‐ Then Tim got in the elevator
531
00:24:19,376 --> 00:24:20,961
with this trash bag,
532
00:24:20,961 --> 00:24:22,880
and he was on the phone
talking about the package.
533
00:24:22,880 --> 00:24:25,549
‐ We had that cool connection
about your Beats.
534
00:24:25,549 --> 00:24:27,551
Do you like your Beats?
535
00:24:32,556 --> 00:24:36,435
‐ Anyway, um, Tim got out of
the elevator with this trash bag.
536
00:24:39,104 --> 00:24:40,272
♪
537
00:24:40,272 --> 00:24:41,315
Oliver?
538
00:24:41,899 --> 00:24:44,610
The trash bag that Tim had in the elevator
539
00:24:44,610 --> 00:24:46,195
has blue straps.
540
00:24:46,195 --> 00:24:47,821
‐ So?
541
00:24:47,821 --> 00:24:50,365
‐ But all the trash bags
I got from his apartment
542
00:24:50,365 --> 00:24:53,160
when I took all of his stuff
have orange straps.
543
00:24:53,160 --> 00:24:56,330
‐ W‐‐ So, that wasn't his trash?
544
00:24:56,330 --> 00:24:57,623
Why would he have someone else's trash?
545
00:24:57,623 --> 00:24:59,249
♪
546
00:24:59,249 --> 00:25:01,919
Was he taking out his lover's trash?
547
00:25:01,919 --> 00:25:03,921
‐ You know who we haven't interviewed yet?
548
00:25:03,921 --> 00:25:05,714
Tim's next door neighbor.
549
00:25:05,714 --> 00:25:07,007
‐ Ndidi!
550
00:25:07,007 --> 00:25:08,342
‐ She might know if he was seeing someone.
551
00:25:08,342 --> 00:25:09,968
‐ Absolutely! That's brilliant!
552
00:25:09,968 --> 00:25:12,513
[sizzling]
553
00:25:12,513 --> 00:25:14,515
[scraping]
[knocking at door]
554
00:25:19,686 --> 00:25:22,189
Hey, buddy. Checking in on you.
555
00:25:22,189 --> 00:25:24,775
‐ Very thoughtful. Come on in.
556
00:25:27,319 --> 00:25:28,904
[shuts door]
‐ Just wanted to give you
557
00:25:28,904 --> 00:25:31,615
and your lady some space last night.
558
00:25:31,615 --> 00:25:33,617
I'm so sorry I upset you.
559
00:25:34,993 --> 00:25:38,580
I would never make
a move on your girlfriend.
560
00:25:38,580 --> 00:25:39,957
[grinding pepper]
561
00:25:39,957 --> 00:25:41,959
Again.
562
00:25:41,959 --> 00:25:44,670
‐ Thanks so much.
‐ Ah!
563
00:25:45,587 --> 00:25:47,881
And the truth about Cookie is,
564
00:25:47,881 --> 00:25:50,384
I, once again,
am taking the hit for you. [laughs]
565
00:25:51,552 --> 00:25:53,554
That which can be stolen...
566
00:25:54,137 --> 00:25:55,430
can be stolen.
567
00:25:56,849 --> 00:25:58,350
She left me.
568
00:25:59,518 --> 00:26:01,311
After 20 years, man.
569
00:26:01,311 --> 00:26:02,771
She left me for another guy.
570
00:26:03,730 --> 00:26:05,315
‐ Well,
571
00:26:05,315 --> 00:26:06,650
I'm sorry.
572
00:26:06,650 --> 00:26:09,653
‐ I don't know how it happened!
I tried to keep it interesting, but...
573
00:26:11,738 --> 00:26:14,032
Who can keep up with all
the new stuff, you know?
574
00:26:14,032 --> 00:26:16,034
After 20 years.
575
00:26:16,034 --> 00:26:18,787
Mm. Did you see it coming
when Cookie left you?
576
00:26:19,288 --> 00:26:20,622
‐ No.
577
00:26:20,622 --> 00:26:22,082
I did not.
578
00:26:22,082 --> 00:26:24,501
‐ [sighs] I shouldn't be
leaning on you about this,
579
00:26:24,501 --> 00:26:26,211
but honestly,
580
00:26:26,211 --> 00:26:27,880
this is why I came.
581
00:26:27,880 --> 00:26:30,507
We both deserve someone...
582
00:26:30,507 --> 00:26:31,842
just like Jan.
583
00:26:31,842 --> 00:26:33,677
You know?
584
00:26:33,677 --> 00:26:35,179
You going to her concert tonight?
585
00:26:35,721 --> 00:26:38,223
‐ Uh, no. She asked me not to come.
586
00:26:39,349 --> 00:26:40,851
I think, um...
587
00:26:41,435 --> 00:26:43,145
I think she might be pulling away.
588
00:26:43,520 --> 00:26:45,731
[puts down cutlery]
I know you, Charles.
589
00:26:45,731 --> 00:26:48,859
That's why gender never
prevented me from doubling for you.
590
00:26:48,859 --> 00:26:50,861
Even in the hot tub and the sex scenes.
591
00:26:50,861 --> 00:26:53,280
‐ I thought that was
mostly build and hair.
592
00:26:53,280 --> 00:26:56,074
‐ Twenty years I spent mirroring you.
593
00:26:56,074 --> 00:26:58,577
Getting down your mannerisms,
594
00:26:58,577 --> 00:27:00,037
your gait,
595
00:27:00,037 --> 00:27:01,496
your speech patterns.
596
00:27:01,496 --> 00:27:03,916
But one thing I could never get about you
597
00:27:03,916 --> 00:27:06,668
is how someone as wonderful as you
598
00:27:06,668 --> 00:27:08,795
could think so little of himself.
599
00:27:09,379 --> 00:27:11,381
I could never understand it.
600
00:27:12,799 --> 00:27:14,593
This is the girl for you, pal.
601
00:27:14,593 --> 00:27:17,221
I felt it the moment I walked
into the room yesterday.
602
00:27:17,221 --> 00:27:21,016
And she's got a very big
first chair bassoon moment tonight,
603
00:27:21,016 --> 00:27:22,267
and here you are,
604
00:27:22,267 --> 00:27:24,978
in the apartment, with your
creaky‐kneed stunt double,
605
00:27:24,978 --> 00:27:28,565
and your sad little melancholy omelet.
606
00:27:28,565 --> 00:27:31,568
♪
607
00:27:32,528 --> 00:27:34,696
‐ You know what?
I think I can just make it.
608
00:27:34,696 --> 00:27:37,282
‐ Oh, attaboy!
609
00:27:37,282 --> 00:27:40,577
Comeback kid!
We are so gonna get Tarantino'd!
610
00:27:40,577 --> 00:27:41,578
[knocking]
611
00:27:43,038 --> 00:27:46,124
‐ Hi, Mrs. Idoko.
I‐I'm sorry to disturb you.
612
00:27:46,124 --> 00:27:49,962
I know we're not exactly
popular right now, but, um‐‐
613
00:27:49,962 --> 00:27:51,171
‐ I don't care.
614
00:27:51,171 --> 00:27:53,173
You're clearly better
at this than the police.
615
00:27:53,173 --> 00:27:56,885
‐ Is there anything that you could
tell us about Tim, Ms. Idoko?
616
00:27:56,885 --> 00:27:59,555
Did you see someone come in and out?
617
00:27:59,555 --> 00:28:01,974
‐ No, I never saw anyone but,
618
00:28:01,974 --> 00:28:04,810
we certainly heard
a late night visitor.
619
00:28:04,810 --> 00:28:06,270
A loud one.
620
00:28:06,270 --> 00:28:08,355
‐ Sex! You mean sex!
621
00:28:08,355 --> 00:28:10,315
‐ Tim was seeing someone?
622
00:28:10,315 --> 00:28:12,818
‐ Oh yes, but I‐I never saw her though.
623
00:28:12,818 --> 00:28:15,404
‐ But it was a woman?
‐ Oh yes.
624
00:28:16,822 --> 00:28:19,324
I never heard a woman scream like that.
625
00:28:20,492 --> 00:28:23,412
I hated Tim Kono, but oof.
626
00:28:23,412 --> 00:28:25,414
That man knew what he was doing.
627
00:28:26,498 --> 00:28:27,875
[Oliver growls]
628
00:28:27,875 --> 00:28:30,878
[auditorium chatter]
[instruments warming up]
629
00:28:44,683 --> 00:28:47,728
‐ I can't believe we never found
anything that pointed to a girlfriend.
630
00:28:47,728 --> 00:28:51,190
‐ I mean, besides that
first engagement ring.
631
00:28:51,190 --> 00:28:54,359
‐ Maybe we've been following
the wrong ring this whole time?
632
00:28:54,359 --> 00:28:58,238
‐ I don't know why I feel compelled
to know what these things are for.
633
00:28:58,238 --> 00:29:00,616
But maybe, it will give us
a better picture of who she is.
634
00:29:00,616 --> 00:29:03,285
‐ This one tells me that she...
635
00:29:03,285 --> 00:29:05,662
likes pretending she's a cat?
636
00:29:05,662 --> 00:29:08,165
[Oliver laughs]
I don't know, what is this?
637
00:29:08,165 --> 00:29:10,125
‐ No, I remember this one.
638
00:29:10,125 --> 00:29:12,628
It's... Yeah! Yeah!
[whipping, thud]
639
00:29:13,962 --> 00:29:16,048
"Exotic Instruments."
640
00:29:16,048 --> 00:29:17,716
Somebody young look that up.
641
00:29:18,383 --> 00:29:21,386
[symphony warming up]
642
00:29:21,386 --> 00:29:24,598
[audience chatter]
643
00:29:24,598 --> 00:29:26,391
‐ You look excited.
644
00:29:26,391 --> 00:29:28,227
‐ I'm here to see my girlfriend.
645
00:29:28,227 --> 00:29:30,896
‐ Oh. Me, too.
646
00:29:30,896 --> 00:29:33,524
‐ Mine's a prodigy.
‐ [laughs] Oh good.
647
00:29:36,568 --> 00:29:39,571
[applause]
648
00:29:44,660 --> 00:29:46,995
[applause dies down]
649
00:29:46,995 --> 00:29:50,249
‐ Tonight, we break custom,
for very good reason,
650
00:29:50,249 --> 00:29:52,292
with this evening's Stravinsky piece,
651
00:29:52,292 --> 00:29:54,753
to give special mention to our soloist,
652
00:29:54,753 --> 00:29:56,129
the youngest
653
00:29:56,129 --> 00:29:59,383
first chair bassoonist
in our symphony's history.
654
00:29:59,383 --> 00:30:00,968
Ms. Allison Tipton.
655
00:30:00,968 --> 00:30:04,429
[applause]
656
00:30:04,429 --> 00:30:07,432
♪
657
00:30:08,934 --> 00:30:10,811
‐ That's her. That's my girlfriend.
658
00:30:10,811 --> 00:30:13,313
[applause continues]
659
00:30:15,732 --> 00:30:18,151
[loud cheering]
660
00:30:18,151 --> 00:30:19,361
MABEL:
That's so weird.
661
00:30:19,361 --> 00:30:22,781
Exotic instruments doesn't sell sex toys.
662
00:30:23,782 --> 00:30:26,076
It sells musical instruments.
663
00:30:26,076 --> 00:30:27,911
‐ Really?
‐ Oliver...
664
00:30:29,413 --> 00:30:32,833
Why is there a bassoon cleaner
in Tim's sex toy box?
665
00:30:32,833 --> 00:30:35,836
♪
666
00:30:37,045 --> 00:30:40,048
[auditorium chatter]
[symphony warming up]
667
00:30:45,262 --> 00:30:48,265
♪
668
00:31:14,875 --> 00:31:17,878
♪
669
00:31:38,315 --> 00:31:41,318
[fanfare]50093
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