Original subtitles

(tires squealing) (motor revving)

(funky music)

- [Dispatcher] Attention all units!

The mayor's stretch limousine has been stolen.

It was last seen headed south on Angel Boulevard.

Proceed with extreme caution!

It's the mayor's favorite limo.

(tires screeching)

(car accelerating)

(tires screeching)

(funky music) (car motor revving)

- You picked the wrong car for a joy ride.

(tires screeching)

(car revving) - Activate auto-transform.

(electrical zapping)

(car accelerating)

(soft music)

(exciting music)

(weapon firing) - Ugh!

(tires screeching)

(car accelerating)

- You like to play golf, huh?

Well, I been workin' on my chip shot.

Computer, engage missile launch.

(electrical buzzing)

Fore! (weapon firing)

(missile exploding)

A hole in one!

(car crashing)

(body thuds to ground)

(car crashing) (metal clanking)

Oh, my God!

(tires screeching) (limo accelerating)

(driving music)

(artificial laughter)

What are you laughing at?

(dummy thuds to ground)

- Looks like I made a dummy out of the Black Scorpion.

(car accelerating)

(driving music) (tires screeching)

- Fire! (weapon firing)

(missile exploding)

(electrical zapping)

- [Announcer] In the light of day,

Darcy Walker is a cop,

but in the dark of night,

she becomes Black Scorpion.

(energetic music)

Doing with a mask what she can't do with a badge.

(bullets firing)

(energetic music)

(cars passing)

(applause) - Thank you, thank you!

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Oh, has everyone here heard of the Gangster Prankster?

(audience affirming)

You know, the super villain who giggles like a girl?

(imitates giggling) (audience laughs)

Well, there's a reason he's got that stupid grin

plastered on his face. (audience chatters)

He is stupid. (audience laughs)

- [Audience] How stupid is he?

- He is so stupid,

he actually turned himself in to get the reward money.

(audience laughs)

- But really, I shouldn't attack

the Gangster Prankster's intelligence.

He's funny, but looks aren't everything.

(chuckles) (TV crashes)

- Oh, he thinks he's real funny,

but I'll have the last laugh when I break outta here!

- How we gonna bust out?

- The same way we did before, with Aftershock.

(explosion and glass shattering)

Who broke wind?

(cell door crashes)

(weapon fires) - Ugh!

- Damn!

- Are you the Gangster Prankster?

- Who the hell are you?

- It ain't Mommy.

- I'm your ticket outta here.

(laughing)

(gunfire) (laughing)

(energetic music)

- [Heckler] But Aftershock's dead!

- She may be dead, but I know someone living

that can get us outta here!

- [Charlie Chortle] You know, the Gangster Prankster

is so ugly.

- [Audience] How ugly is he?

- [Charlie Chortle] He's so ugly...

- That Gangster Prankster fool

is sure gettin' what he deserves.

(TV playing)

- Look, nobody deserves to be publicly

humiliated like that, nobody.

- He's gotta pay his debt to society.

- And he's doin' that by livin' his life behind bars.

(TV audience laughing)

- Okay, defend him, all you cons

stick together, anyway.

- That con happens to be my brother.

- Don't remind me.

(cars passing)

- Why does an intelligent thought

always die such a quick death

in the brain of the Gangster Prankster?

It can't stand solitary confinement.

(laughing)

- I hate to break up your yuk fest,

but I just got an anonymous tip

on the location of the mayor's limo.

- Lemme see that. - Whoa, hey!

- Take Rafferty and check it out.

(high-pitched whirring)

- Look, I'm telling you, Argyle

would never steal the mayor's limo.

- Oh, come on, Darce.

It certainly fits within his criminal history.

- That's ancient history.

This has gotta be some kinda joke.

- Please, you wouldn't know a joke

if it bit you in your funny bone.

- Really?

- Hey, hey, hey, hey, there he is.

- All right, look, he's my friend.

Just let me do the talkin', huh?

(throaty grunt)

- [Argyle] Mmm, lookin' so good and so fine,

and you know I had too much wine. (chuckles)

- [Tender Lovin'] I know you did.

- I'm gonna make a little love tonight.

- [Tender Lovin'] Oh, yes, baby! (giggles)

You know what I'm talkin' 'bout.

Hey, Blue!

What brings you by the old garage tonight?

- Argyle, we'll ask the questions.

- Please...

Where were you tonight?

- Me and my baby just had a romantic candlelight dinner.

- Yeah, we had a little argument earlier,

and Argyle was apologizing.

- I was apologizing?

You were apologizing.

- Argyle, you're a suspect in a robbery--

- If you don't mind,

we just need to take a look in your garage.

- Blue, is this a joke?

I mean, 'cause it's not funny.

- I wish it were.

- Okay, okay, I hope you weren't planning a surprise

party 'cause it's not my birthday.

(gate rattling)

They made a big mistake, Blue, 'cause I--

- [Rafferty] Well, well, well, surprise!

- Argyle!

- How could you?

- But baby, I didn't!

- Yeah, right, that's what they all say.

Listen, you're comin' downtown with us.

- Hey, man, you got the wrong guy!

- I got the wrong guy!

- All right, let's go, come on!

Turn around, put your hands behind your back.

- No, no, no, look, Steve!

I'll cuff him, all right?

Turn around. - Blue!

- I didn't wanna have to do this.

- Then don't. (handcuffs click)

(mournful music)

- Argyle!

- Hello, Luther.

- Ah, now what's a nice guy like you

doin' in a place like this?

- I was framed.

- You don't say!

Wha, I was, too!

Grimace, Heckler, were you framed?

- I was. - Yeah, me, too!

And my mother framed my mugshot.

(hysterical cackling)

- But don't worry, I won't be here for long.

My friends are gonna get me out.

- What friends?

What, you mean that cop chick?

Argyle, if I told you once,

I told you a million times,

you can't trust cops!

If your friends are cops,

you can't trust your friends.

And if you can't trust your friends,

who can you trust?

- My girl, Tender Lovin', she'll bail me out.

- Oooooh, how do you know?

- Because she never lets me finish a sentence. (chuckles)

- Leave the jokes to me, bro.

And your girl to Mr. Moneybags.

(laughing)

- What are you talking about, Luther?

- Word on the street is

she's got herself a sugar daddy.

(cackling)

- But I give her everything she needs!

- Except money! (laughing)

- Well, money and hair aren't everything.

- They are when you don't have 'em!

(cackling)

- All I know is, my girl is happy.

- Want to know who else is makin' her happy?

(hysterical cackling) (energetic music)

(suspenseful chord)

- What, are you hooking us up for cable?

- Why don't you turn on the TV and find out, brother?

- Don't mind if I do.

Step back.

(whirring) (TV shattering)

Oh!

(electrical buzzing) (hysterical cackling)

(energetic music) (laughing)

- [Guard] Where do you think you're going?

- To get a midnight snack?

- Yeah, and we want it to go! (chuckles)

- Ugh! - Ah!

(laughing) - Sorry, boss!

- Let's take a field trip, felons!

(laughing) (energetic music)

(gun fire)

(yelling) (lauging)

(gun fire) (gate opening)

- How we gonna get over all that barbed wire?

- Don't worry, and back up!

(gun fire)

(fence crashes) (laughing)

- [Argyle] Go, go, go, go!

(cackling laughter) Go!

(truck accelerating)

- Man, it's good to have you back in the old gang, man!

- Hey, man, I'm not in a gang, man.

Keep your eyes on the road! - Ooh!

- I'm not in a gang anymore, Luther.

I'm just going home to see my baby.

- What makes you think she's at home?

- Don't start that again.

She's at home, all right.

My baby is a home lovin' girl.

- Yeah, home lovin' on another man!

Woo, hoo, hoo! - It's not funny.

I'm gonna go talk to her.

- Wait!

Who's that?

- She already got somebody new!

- Well, you know what they say.

Absence makes the heart go wander!

- Oh, baby, baby, you're so sweet.

(imitates male voice) That's because

I'm your sugar daddy. (giggles)

- What am I gonna do now?

- Well, you could join the gang and

follow in your brother's fingerprints.

Remember the fun we had, bro?

(laughing) (gun fire)

(yelling) (gun fire)

(guitar riffs) (explosions)

- What I do remember is what happened the first time.

(laughing)

- Give it up, Prankster!

- You crazy?

I always play to sudden death!

- That's the way you want it.

Fire! (weapons firing)

- Yeah, but now I've got you lookin' out for me, bro.

- We better get rich this time.

- Welcome back, bro! (laughs)

(crickets chirping)

- All right.

- Listen, I don't really care if

Argyle stole the car or not.

I just want to bail him out so that

I can give him my own brand of justice.

- I'm workin' on it.

- [Rafferty] So, I was so nuts about this girl

that lived next door to me-- - What?

- Would you please let me finish?

- Oh, I'm sorry, is this another one

of your hilarious jokes?

(phone clicks) - Well?

- You're not gonna have to bail out Argyle.

He just broke out of jail with the

Gangster Prankster and his gang.

- What are you talking about?

- They were last seen headed south in an ice cream truck.

- Well, I guess the joke's on you, huh, Darce?

(mournful music) (cars passing)

- Giggles! (laughs)

After being in prison so long,

the only woman in the world that can

give me what I need.

- What's that, Pranky?

- A good laugh! (giggles)

Start tickling, baby! (chuckles)

Oh, Argyle, you gotta try this, baby!

This is so fun! (chuckles)

- I'm here for business, not pleasure, Luther.

- Hey, pleasure is my business, fool!

I'm a clown, remember?

I make people laugh! (laughing)

- How we gonna get rich off of laughter?

- By taking it hostage and demanding a king's ransom!

- How we gonna do that, Pranky?

- Yeah, Luther, how we gonna do that?

- Hey, the newest member of our gang

is gonna invent a high-tech, super-sonic,

one-of-a-kind thingamajig!

- It's not as easy as you make it sound.

- The only sound I want to hear is silence!

Now, from now on, if anybody laughs, they go bye-bye!

- Look, Luther, I'm not gonna kill anyone.

- Hey, you want your girl back or not?

- Yeah, but I'm not a murderer!

- Details, details.

You just make sure that if anybody in this city laughs,

they pay the price!

- I suppose I could do that,

but only if you promise me, no one gets hurt.

- Hey, I promise!

Good lookin' out, bro! (laughs)

(energetic music)

- This area's restricted, turn around.

- Turn around?

- You some kinda nut?

- Sorry, we're outta nuts!

How 'bout some whipped cream? - Huh?

(whipped cream spraying) (hysterical cackling)

- Ugh, crazy!

- How 'bout a cherry on top? - Ugh!

(cherry thuds) - Oof!

(laughing)

- Here comes the cavalry!

- Roll out the barrels!

Fire the tutti frutti!

(missile firing) (explosion)

(hysterical cackling)

- [Dispatcher] Attention, all units!

Respond to Fort Angel Military Base

for emergency reinforcement!

We have reports of automatic weapons fire

and intense cackling.

- Gangster Pranskter!

(sirens wailing)

(engine revving)

- Copy that, this is Unit Two-Niner-Six-Two responding.

I'm requesting the first available backup.

(car accelerating) (tires screeching)

- Activate auto-transform.

(electricity zapping)

- Why is this taking so long?

(cackling) - It would go a lot faster

if those fools would keep it down.

(energetic music) (car engine accelerating)

- Coffee, tea, or me? - You! (laughing)

(powerful music)

- Black Scorpion! - Uh-oh!

- Heard any good ones lately?

- Why did the Black Scorpion cross the road?

- You tell me.

- I don't know, she never made it to the other side!

(hysterical cackling)

- Get 'em, Blue, get 'em!

(whacking) (Heckler thuds to ground)

(smacking) - Ugh!

(whacking) - Ugh!

(Grimace thuds to ground)

- You guys need to work on your delivery.

(giggles)

What are you giggling about?

- I don't know, it's just something I do.

- Here's something I do.

(whacking) - Ah!

(smacking) (Prankster thuds to ground)

(crowbar clatters) - Ugh!

(Giggles screaming)

(sinister music) - Argyle?

So it's true, you really did join the gang again.

- I didn't have a choice, Blue.

- What, did the Gangster Prankster force you?

- No, you did, you and Tender Lovin'.

- What are you talking about?

- I'm talking about her sugar daddy!

- No, this has gotta be some kinda mistake.

Look, you can't just throw your life away

over a misunderstanding.

I won't stand for it!

(whacking) Ugh!

- [Gangster Prankster] Nice distraction, Argyle!

(laughing) - Take off her mask, Pranky!

- [Heckler] Yeah!

- No, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait a second!

Look, takin' off her mask, it won't make us any richer.

Besides, I already got the computer chip!

- Hmm, you're so practical, Argyle.

- Thank you. - Well, so am I!

A practical joker! (laughing)

Off with her mask! (cackling)

- [Grimace] Hey, it's the cops!

- Let's blow this Popsicle stand!

(sirens wailing) (energetic music)

- All right, all right, let's go, come on!

Roll over, kiss some concrete!

Hands behind the neck, and no funny business!

- I'm not the Gangster Prankster.

- A criminal's a criminal.

- And I thought we had something special.

- Oh, we do, sweetheart.

I'll send you flowers in prison.

- And I'll send 'em to you while you're in the hospital.

Ah! - Ugh!

(energetic music) (sirens wailing)

(groaning) (slapping)

(handcuffs clicking)

(driving music) (sirens wailing)

- Attention, all units!

Black Scorpion-mobile heading north on Paradise Parkway.

(sirens wailing) (tires squealing)

(gunfire)

(beeping)

(scorpion clangs)

(tire popping) (tires screeching)

(tire popping) (sirens wailing)

- Computer, activate thermal imaging.

Locate all moving ice cream trucks

within a 20-block radius.

(computer beeping)

(truck accelerating)

(energetic music)

(tires squealing)

- Looks like we got a tough customer!

- [Gangster Prankster] She's gonna be hard to satisfy!

- I wonder what flavor she likes?

- Give her some Rocky Road! (hysterical cackling)

(explosion) (laughing)

(explosions) (hysterical cackling)

(explosion)

- Ice cream's too fattening.

- She doesn't like ice cream! - Then I'll give her a shake!

(tires squealing)

- You drive like a clown!

- What do we do now, Pranky?

- Give her a taste of hot fudge!

- Yeah!

(laughing) (fudge splattering)

(cackling) (tires squealing)

- Another satisfied customer! (laughing)

- After stealing top-secret military electronics,

the Gangster Prankster and his gang of fools

have hijacked the helium shipments,

stolen a police lie detector,

and sawed the giant ear off the Heavenly Burger cupid.

This recent crime spree has authorities baffled.

- What are you up to, Argyle?

- Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the Bust-a-gut!

- Yay! (applauds) - What?

How's this hunk o' junk gonna stop people from laughing?

- Basically, the lie detector is a laugh detector.

- Hmm, this sounds too good to be true.

But how does it stop laughter?

- It works like the arrow cannon Black Scorpion

used to stop you from killing everyone

at the Cop Carnival with your deadly laughing gas.

Yo, computer, activate arrow cannon.

The human ear replica sucks in vibrations

created by the offending laughter.

Helium atoms are then transported

over an ultra-microwave frequency,

bonding with victims' molecules,

inducing abdominal expansion.

Basically, laughter makes the dude blow up.

- Oh, you mean like a bomb!

- Like a balloon.

- Like a balloon?

What you mean, ain't no guts and stuff

gonna spill out all over the place?

- No guts, no spewing.

When they stop laughing, they return to normal size.

- What the hell good does that do?

- It'll really scare 'em.

- That's it, it's gonna scare 'em?

- Well, it'll scare 'em enough to fork over the ransom.

- Oh, man, this thing better work.

- Well, let's go test it and find out.

- Hey, why the hell we gotta watch the thing

from in here, Argyle?

- Yeah, I feel like a Popsicle.

- Sorry, but this freezer is soundproof,

and some of us have a laughing problem.

(laughing)

- What are we gonna use for a guinea pig?

- Voila!

The laugh test dummy.

(artificial laughter)

- Look, Pranky, the dummy's got a tummy!

(laughing)

- Argyle, my brother, you are a genius!

(laughing)

Between your brains and my beauty, nothing can stop us!

No way, no how! (hysterical laughing)

- All we gotta do is put this in a prominent location

overlooking the city, and we are in business!

(laughing)

- I gotta do all the work!

(saw crashes to ground)

(ear crashes)

- Ha ha, way to Van Gough!

(hysterical cackling)

(switches clicking) (laughing and applause)

- It's ready to be activated by remote.

All I gotta do is set it at the right

level back at the hideout.

- Of course, you do!

We wouldn't want to set it at the wrong level,

now, would we?

(cymbal crash) - Hey!

(laughing) (applause)

The Gangster Prankster is so dumb--

- [Audience] How dumb is he?

- When he first saw the police poster

advertising murderer wanted,

he actually applied for the job.

(rim shot) (laughing)

Hey, whoa, hey! (hysterical laughing)

Hey, hold it, hold it, wait a minute.

Put the spotlight back there on that loser.

Who is that, in the back?

Ah, Gangster Prankster!

- Hey, it's him!

- [Charlie Chortle] Ladies and gentlemen, how about a nice--

- I'm going down to the club.

- I'm coming with you.

- No, no, this is police business.

You stay here in case Argyle calls.

- The Gangster Prankster! (applause)

(energetic music) (tires squealing)

(car accelerating) (electrical zapping)

- I don't like you making jokes at my expense!

- But they're not at your expense.

- No, they're not!

- Not when they're cheap shots.

(rim shot) (laughing)

- That's not funny, Chortle!

- My audience thinks they're funny.

- Yeah, well, they won't be laughing tomorrow night.

- Why, are you gonna be writing my jokes?

- Yeah, and this time they're gonna be at your expense.

- What are you talking about?

- Unless $100,000,000 is delivered to the

Charlie Chortle billboard by tomorrow at midnight,

anyone in this city who laughs (chuckles)

will pay the price.

- And how you gonna manage that one?

- With my secret device, the Bust-a-gut! (laughing)

- Except I guess it's not a secret, huh? (laughing)

Boy, you really aren't the brightest bulb in the bunch.

(aggressive smack) (audience gasps)

(rim shot) (laughing)

- Now that's funny! (cackling)

(group chattering and laughing)

Hey, Black Scorpion!

- Starting a TV career?

- Let's just say I'm on the talk show circuit.

(explosion) (laughing)

(explosion)

- You're about to be preempted.

You'll never force me to sign off.

- Then I'll just change the channel.

(grunting) (metal clattering)

(grunting) (metal clattering)

(explosion) - The juice is loose!

(hysterical cackling) (electricity buzzing)

- Agh! (laughing)

- Yay, you finally stung the Black Scorpion!

- No, no, no way, the mayor's not give

$100,000,000 to some circus reject.

- He ought to, the way Babette giggles,

she'll be floating in no time.

- (laughs) Don't make me laugh, Rafferty.

I don't wanna blow up like a balloon.

- It's too late, Cap.

- Shouldn't we be trying to find the Gangster Prankster?

- I think he's after one thing, revenge.

And if he goes after Charlie again,

this time we'll be there.

- As long as you don't get into the habit!

(laughing)

- Charlie, Charlie, I been working

on some material in the squad room,

and I think I can help you.

- Whoopee! - Yeah.

How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?

- Uh, one, but you can never find him when you need him.

It's in my book, moron.

- I knew I read it somewhere.

- No, no, no, no, wait, wait, wait just one minute.

I got one for us, okay?

I arrested this really terrible terrorist the other day,

and he got so upset with me, he tried to blow my car up.

But he kept burning his lips on the tailpipe.

(cops laughing) (clapping)

- You the man!

- Uh, if I were you guys, I wouldn't give up my day jobs.

- Is he mocking us?

- What the guy said.

- Hey, thanks for the tip, pal.

- Let's shoot him.

- No...

- Come on, don't worry about the Gangster Prankster's

threat to kill us if we laugh!

I mean, he's really lousy at this terror stuff.

Just today, he tried to blow up my car,

but he kept burning his lips on the tailpipe.

(rim shot) (laughing)

- [Rafferty] He stole my joke.

- [Charlie Chortle] Come on, come on, laugh.

- Which is exactly why no one's laughing.

(crowd chattering)

- Come on, don't worry about a death threat!

Laugh. (chuckles)

Laugh. (chuckles)

Laugh, ha ha ha.

Laugh!

- Where's my ransom?

- Guess they don't take you seriously.

- I'll show 'em how serious a funny guy can be.

- I'll tell you what I'm gonna do

to prove it's safe to laugh at my jokes.

I'm gonna get the world's biggest belly laugh, right now.

- Argyle, activate that Bust-a-gut!

(beeping)

- [Charlie Chortle] You ready? (chuckles)

(laughing) - Whoa! What's happening?

Somebody help me!

I promise I'll stop! (laughing)

- It works, it works! (laughing)

(stretching) - Ugh, ah!

I promise I'll stop!

I'm gonna bust a gut!

- Hey, hey, hey, put that thing away!

- Why?

- Because if you shoot him, he might pop!

- Yeah, but if we get a few more of these balloon people,

we can start our own parade!

- Why are you doing that?

- Because if they laugh,

they're gonna blow up like balloons!

(screaming)

This is part of the Gangster Prankster's freak show.

- Wait, wait, stop, somebody help me!

(laughing) (screaming)

- I can make it work even better.

Hey! - No, come on, Luther, don't!

- Grimace, end this sibling rivalry!

- You're gonna hurt him, no! (laughing)

- Give it! (laughing)

- [Argyle] No, no!

(cackling)

(sinister music) (screaming)

- I'm gonna bust a gut! (cackling)

Help, somebody (gurgling)...

- Boom! (audience groans)

(sinister music)

- It's grim in the City of Angels,

as the entire population lives

with the terror that laughter now brings.

Now, in spite of a city-wide laughing ban,

renegade laughers throughout the metropolitan area

have met with fatal consequences.

(birds chirping)

- So I understand you've been feeling

a little schizophrenic lately.

- Yeah.

No.

Yeah.

- Well, that makes four of us.

Get it, four of us? (giggles)

It's just a little psychotherapy humor. (laughs)

(beeping) (laughing)

(stretching) (screaming)

(popping)

- Stray laughers are popping like balloons

all over the city!

- Well, at least we're all safe

with Miss Walker around.

- I appreciate your confidence in me.

- Hey, hey, no problem, I am truly confident

that you can't tell a joke.

- This is not a laughing matter, Rafferty!

- I'm serious, Cap, Darce is not funny.

- Well, that's all going to change.

- "I'm Laughing With You: The Collected Works

"of Charlie Chortle."

- Hey, put that away, you wanna kill somebody?

- Wait, you wanna be funny now?

- I've been thinking about what you said.

Maybe all we need to catch the Gangster Prankster

is a good comedian.

- I'm the last one laughing!

I'm the last one laughing! (laughing)

- You promised you wouldn't kill anybody, Luther!

- Oops, I must've had my fingers crossed!

(laughing)

- You tricked me!

- Hey, it's not the first time, bro!

- What? - Show him, Giggles.

- [Giggles] My pleasure.

Ooh, baby, baby, you're so sweet!

(imitates male voice) That's because I'm your sugar daddy.

(laughing)

- Where you goin'?

You go out that door, you'll kill us!

- I'm leaving, Luther. - Huh?

Well, are you gonna come back?

- I'm leaving the gang permanently.

- Well, I wouldn't have it any other way.

Since I didn't get my ransom,

I'm gonna kill everybody in the city.

- But to do that, you gotta be funny,

and Luther, you ain't funny.

- I don't need to be funny, brother.

- You don't? - No!

Not when I can hijack a jet and dump

feathers all over the city!

And when everybody starts laughing,

they'll be dead, just like you!

Enjoy your tickle torture.

(groaning)

- Go ahead and laugh!

Break out of your shell!

- Yeah, open up and show us you have a heart!

- Yeah, we wanna see the inner you!

- Now, now, now, fellas!

Don't joke with him, you know he has such thin skin.

(groaning) (laughter)

Thank you!

Let's get outta here!

(sinister music)

(grunting)

(beeping)

(car accelerating) (electricity zapping)

- Computer, follow Argyle homing beacon.

Merry-Go-Round Ice Cream?

Time for dessert.

Argyle!

- True Blue! (electrical zapping)

Blue, baby, how can I ever thank you?

- You can tell me how to find the Bust-a-gut.

- It's behind the billboard at Charlie Chortle's.

- All right, I'm on my way.

- Whoa, whoa, whoa, not so fast!

If you disable it, it'll explode,

and I don't mean with laughter.

- Then how am I gonna save the city?

- The only way to do it is with remote control,

but that clown I have for a brother has it.

- Where is he?

(sneezing)

- Gesundheit! - Thank you.

- I'll get the goons, you get the Gangster.

- I'll wipe that smile off his face.

Gimme that remote, clown boy!

- Huh, remote this! (smacking)

(grunting) (laughing)

- What's the matter, Giggles, afraid to laugh?

- [Giggles] Yes!

(smacking and grunting) (fighting and punching)

(powerful music) (fighting and punching)

- Birds of a feather, knocked together.

- Mine, mine, mine. - Mommy said we should...

(screams)

- You busted my Bust-a-gut! (punching)

Come here! (kicking and grunting)

- Looks like it's safe for the city to laugh again.

- It might be safe for the city,

but not you, Black Scorpion!

- Wait, don't I get any last words?

- All right, but you better make it fast.

- Is a joke quick enough for you?

- Okay, well, let's hear it.

- Bunch of convicts, eating dinner in a prison,

when I bank robber shouts out, "26!"

Everyone laughs, then a serial killer jumps

up on the table and shouts, "542!"

Again, everyone laughs, so a shoplifter

says to his cellmate, "I don't get it.

"What's so funny?"

Cellmate says, "Well, we only have one

joke book in the library,

and we know 'em all by heart,

so instead of reciting 'em,

we just shout out the number."

Shoplifter jumps up on the table,

shouts, "Number eight!"

Dead silence, nothing.

"Why didn't anybody laugh?"

Cellmate shrugs, "Must be your delivery."

(laughing) - Hey, that's pretty funny!

(laughing)

- Time to bust a gut.

(laughing) (stretching)

- Argyle!

How could you do this to-- (laughing)

We're family! (laughing)

- With family like you, who needs enemies?

- You're killing me! (laughing)

(beeping) (laughing)

(stretching and ripping) (explosion)

- At least this time, he died laughing.

And his cellmate shrugs, "It must be your delivery."

(laughing)

- I gotta write that one down right now!"

- That is number 62 for the ball, huh?

- Oh, yeah! - Yeah, Doug, ah!

- Ah, geez, listen, Walker.

- Oh, I'm all ears.

- Look, I uh, I wanted to apologize.

You know, uh, you really do have a good sense of humor.

- Ah, come on, I just memorized a bunch of jokes.

- You're funny even when you pretend to not get my jokes.

- I'm not pretending.

- Yeah, right, good one, Walker.

(smooth jazz music)

- I can't believe I thought you had a sugar daddy.

- But I do.

- Who?

- You.

(driving music)