Original subtitles

Yeah.

Could I have a word with you, please, madam, with Ethel?

Yeah, come in.

What's up, then?

Ethel, ask something to say to you, madam.

Go on, Ethel.

Please, madam.

I want to give him my notice.

You what?

You can't leave me now, not when I'm short-ainted like this.

She's going into munitions.

Well, you must be mad.

Would you want to go and do a thing like that for?

After all the trouble, I'd come to make sure everyone in this hotel would be exempt.

We'd do any important work here.

All members of the government have rules, generals, officers on leave.

They've got to have somewhere to come, somewhere safe, where they'll be looked after, no one will blab.

Now, why should you suddenly decide to leave?

You tell Mrs. Trotter the rest, Ethel.

She's gone and got herself engaged.

Engage, don't...

Don't tell me.

Yes, it's that young Clive Baker.

Oh, Ethel.

Don't know about you, I don't really.

You're going into munitions, you're engaged to a conchie?

He's not a conchie.

He's a conchie and she's a subjector.

And he's volunteered for the front.

And I want to get this war over with...

before he gets killed.

Yeah, well, I still think it'd be more useful here.

But if you've made up your mind, I suppose there's nothing to be done.

You let me know when you want to leave, I'll get your wages made up.

I'm our chief and, uh, putting in a bit extra for an engagement prison.

Thank you, Mrs. Trotter.

Yeah, well, we better go and do some work while you are at here.

Mrs. Trotter.

That was a nice thing to do.

I'm not sure if she's so good if she's leaving, she's leaving.

No, I meant about the plaque.

I'm sure Mr. Starr really appreciated it.

Poor little Fred.

Oh, yeah.

Oh.

He's one good thing that bomb did.

It was getting really bloody dog.

I never could stand him myself.

Who's that?

No, no, no, no, no.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, Fred.

It's enough of that.

Oh.

Come on.

This collar's too big for you now, and you haven't earned the right to wear it.

But I hope in time you'll grow into it.

Oh, cool, Blimey.

He'd like to line up all politicians, profiteers, pacifists, news paper men.

Yeah, I agree with that.

And the four or five thousand red tabbed-off, we did staff officers at present at fourth

core headquarters and chuck them in the river wiser.

He's there.

Hey.

He's there.

Oh.

He's there.

Especially the...

Blimey, the censor must have raised a blow on her at this lock.

No censor when it comes to me.

It's like the diplomatic bag.

Sounds real gluey.

See you all on now, friend.

My bloody years, not for it to show for it.

So far, best friend's gone now, Major.

All the best ones are made last tick.

Oh, but lonely.

Fancy, Phil.

Oh, sweet, young titch.

Oh, dead.

Now, on top of all that, we've got to close the place.

You mean shut up, Shob.

Yeah.

Nosey young devil and the council came around the other day.

Said this was a public place.

I ask you.

Said it wasn't safe on account of what the bomb did.

Not sure what a bill was it been.

It was a seven or eight weeks sitting around,

twilling up thumbs and getting covered in dust.

I've got some lead.

Oh, well, I'll find you another bill.

What am I going to do with the staff?

Can't open a guest, Smiles Factory.

Can't even go and see Charlie.

Unless you smuggled me across in your little black bag.

I just might be able to wangle your past if you were to do some

important war work over in France.

Yeah.

Can't.

Major, what could I do?

Well, go out the dugouts.

See if they're at water bowls or field.

On my way back and forth, I sometimes stay in the line.

Waiting for the mail, but of course, the line's full of store dumps

and hospitals and transit reinforcement camps.

They're all pretty well organized.

But there is one thing that badly needs doing.

You see the chaps coming on leave from the front,

rolling up in trains and buses and carts and Lord knows what else.

And then they're left.

Stranded, waiting for the next boat.

No canteen, no shelter.

Four devils sometimes have to wait on the key all night in the pouring rain.

You don't get enough food.

No tea, nothing.

No, nothing.

Oh, man.

It's a real gap in the army's defenses.

It needs someone like you to start something up.

Get it going.

Oh, stop mucking about that bloody puppy.

You get me there, Mrs. Cochran up here.

Double quick time.

Yeah, but wouldn't be nowhere to go, would they?

Probably the hospitals and stores.

There is no cafe down to the docks with a bit of a kitchen behind it.

Of course, it's empty now and a bit rundown, but it is bang on the key.

Is it?

I happen to know the Quartermaster General's department would help all they could.

They'll have it a key on that, yeah.

You're not pushing me, British Isles. Are you major?

Yes.

Oh, yeah, come in, you two.

I'm out.

Are you govin'?

Oh, major.

Now, how to you two like the idea of sittin' on your bums in this place?

Right, I'll be able to just get it together again.

Well, not very much, but we've been wondering it.

That is Mrs. Cochran and I've been wondering it.

Yeah, well, I've been wondering, too. That's what I sent for you.

You two are gonna do your bit to help win this war.

You're both gonna volunteer for service overseas.

Well, I'm not for one.

Oh, yes, you are, Mrs. Cochran.

You, me and Mary, we're going to up across to Belong, have a bit of a holiday, open up a canteen.

I'm sure funds could be allocated.

Now, I'm paying. Major can arrange the passes and he can drive.

Well, what about my lead?

Major, this was all your art here. I'm here, payin' orders.

Now, what are we gonna need?

I'm gonna need your lead.

Please, please, please, please.

Please, please, please, please.

I know.

Please, please.

High five.

I know.

Should I have a tricer?

He said no one managed perfectly well.

It's probably flooded or magneto trouble.

I was a chauffeur in the old days.

I'll just check theoffirl, please.

Don't touch it.

Sergeant, I happen to know that as much about the internal combustion engine as anyone in Great Britain.

And especially about this particular bottle, and baking the oil information.

Bloody thing won't start up.

If Imore time, Sergeant.

I'm ready for the scrappings, didn't you, as me?

I will find me or the car.

Oh, come on, Major.

This lever's a present for the cars and buy you a new one.

How far is it, anyway?

Oh, well...

Oh, well, push it that far, can't we?

Come on, everyone.

Post.

Go, go, go. That's not for me.

Go, go, go.

Go, go, go.

Go, go, go.

Hey, Madam myself.

Hello, Major.

You and me, Cassey, Cassey, around the corner, eh?

No, thank you very much.

Excuse me, Madam.

Thank you.

Thank you all very much.

Well, here we have a look.

All right.

I'm afraid it's not, er, well...

Oh, no, it's lovely.

Just what we was looking for.

I can't approach you at all.

Anyways, just see.

Yeah, what was it here?

Oh, yeah.

It's all covered.

Now, I'm going to have a lovely time,

catching a bit of some ice, probably, Mary.

All right, I'm going to get started.

You do have some more, we'll be out of there.

That's fine.

I'll be off then.

I don't think you want...

I don't think you won't, Major.

What? What? What?

You won't be off.

Not to, er, clear up that bus.

Good, now you've been a very good ball, Major.

So why don't you just pop outside,

get some of them songs you'll always use to give us another end?

Not very well.

All right, gotta get this lot cleared up, then.

I'm going to get this one out.

Who are you?

My name's Mary Phillips, Mum.

I mean, what are you doing here?

How'd you do?

My name's Mrs. Trotter,

the Benton Co-Tail, Duke Streets and James London.

And I'm here to open a buffet for the troops.

I'm afraid this site has already been requisitioned, Madam.

For Mrs. Farthing Whiteley and the Army overseas buffets.

You're the pitch to the Major here.

You know all those clever.

Well, I'm very sorry to hear that.

So I really am, Mrs. Farthing.

Farthing Whiteley.

There seems to be some misunderstanding.

But I should be obliged if you would leave her immediately.

I shall do no such thing, Army, and I'm staying here.

That is, unless you and your gal would care to join me.

And work under me.

Captain Windham Bragg, Deputy Assistant Proverb Marshal Porter-Balloyne.

I have here an order from the Agidrant General's Department,

requisitioning these premises on behalf of Army overseas buffets.

I want to chuck us out, Major.

Major Smith Barton, 17th Lancers.

King's messenger and military assistant of the Quartermaster General.

I have here an order signed by General Sir John Carnes,

requisitioning these premises on behalf of Mrs. Trotter.

And I think that trumps you on every point.

And stand to attention and salute when you meet us at Bexar Officer.

And, Prey, what is to be the name of this buffet of yours, Madam?

Oh, well, hasn't got one yet.

Oh, yes it is.

I just remembered.

Louisa's.

Very good.

We shall see.

Come, Mrs. Fitzsimmons.

No, I don't think I will.

I think I'll get back to the hotel.

Very good.

I'm absolutely petrified of that old battle axe.

No, not on my own.

Not your old silly Billy's, Mrs. Hup.

Clear review to remember, Mrs. Trotter.

Billy's over here.

He's on the staff, so I thought I'd come over and see if I could talk to you.

Come over and see if I could help.

Oh, that's nice.

Help, ooh.

Oh?

Well, yes.

No, I mean, well, anyone.

You, if you like.

Oh, well.

Yes, I could do with an extra pair of hands if you don't mind hard work.

I've never actually worked before.

I think it would be rather fun.

I'll just nib back to my villa and get my opinion things.

Oh, Mrs. Trotter.

Puffing.

Puffing?

My name.

Oh, yes.

Thanks.

Puffing?

Well, right.

You'll be getting the PC next, you will.

Oh, that was nothing, right?

Here you go.

I'll touch you.

I'll touch you.

I'll touch you.

I'll touch you.

I'll touch you.

I'll touch you.

I'll touch you.

I'll touch you.

I'll touch you.

And the pocket of wood is business.

There we are.

That'll be tough as evening, please.

Oh, are you well?

Yes.

Are you good?

Yes.

What are you doing?

I'm not good.

I'm not good.

I'm not good.

I'm not good.

I'm not good.

I'm not good.

I'm not good.

I'm not good.

Sorry, I'm sorry.

I'll tell the wife.

I'm not good.

I'm not good.

Oh.

Yes, please.

Oh, turn on the what, please.

Sorry?

Tea and a what?

Um, may I go and get you the tea?

Don't have what?

I'll let you do, sir.

That's your what, there?

Ah, I'll let him.

He's standing.

He's still going to call some jammy wads.

How's it going?

How much?

Oh, whatever you like, there's a box there.

There's a tube.

Are you?

Oh.

I'll give you a hand, miss, if you like.

Oh, thanks.

I'm called Job.

Mrs. Cochran, we need some more of them jammy wads.

Oh, you're learning fast, mate.

Oh, you've got that there.

Oh, I'm standing.

I did.

It was so heavy, I...

Who are you?

Trish, are they why you bought the car good?

Fred, I'll have to dash her up and eat for dinner.

Oh, they're not figure.

It's been such fun, all those brave boys.

Well, she says, name was...

Pilchard.

Can I help, man?

I'd started as a later partner bank before I joined up.

Oh, an expert, then.

Yeah, he gave his hand.

He was a soldier these days.

Well, I was a volunteer.

I'm not a conscript.

Hey, are they?

They just sort that little bit.

So you're not going to need the rest of them.

No, I'm an orderly off of the transit camp.

Too young to fight, was you?

I've done a bit of that.

But wounded, was you?

Yeah, just a scratch, but it went a bit bad.

I've got a nice cushy job now, so it's so good to come down and help most of these, have you liked?

Oh, that's nice. Thank you.

Oh, Maggie, you can stop it.

You're off to London on my next boat.

But I've still got a week of my leave.

Well, that's why. You're the only one I can send.

Here.

There's the list of the stuff we need.

50 doesn't pot in meat.

100 weight best flads can fit.

Did you get them out in the middle, sir?

They're good at sitting around the bench.

But you'll never all fit in the bus.

Oh, a bag of the bus. Need a couple of lorries, at least.

You better get him fixed up with that mate that you'll, sir.

This is my old car end.

General Sir John Carrens is the quartermaster general.

Oh, no, he is.

Oh, he's got to the top.

It's my motto, isn't it, Major?

It ain't worked out too badly up to an hour, does it?

Well, there.

I mean, yes.

There.

I never knew a man yet could sew on a button properly.

Thanks, Mary.

You know, the worst thing about it is the dreary boredom of it all.

We're in between the battles.

Nobody cares of them.

Our machine-gathers used to fire off their guns just to get some boiling water to make tea with.

My brother's used to write back quite cheer and letters sometimes.

Well, that's what we all do.

Well, if we didn't, they'd be censored.

Oh, I see.

What did you do then?

When?

I mean, all that boredom. Couldn't you do something?

No. We're just sitting smoke.

I used to try and think of all the nice things I could think of.

We would had stale biscuits and fried bully beef for the 20th time.

I'd try and remember the smell of the bakery next door to his back home.

And the taste of the bats and the tatty scones.

Babs and tatty scones? Have I never heard of them?

Oh, the grand and nearly puddens.

And when it was raining, which it was most of the time,

we were up to a niece in mud.

I'd try and remember some of the trips he'd been on.

Like the paddle boat that took us across the arin.

Where's that?

It's on the Clyde.

Oh.

An island. A big island to be a mountain on it called Gultfeld.

You can see it from the beach back home.

And when it was blue and hazy, well, that meant good weather.

It meant we could go swimming.

Never been swimming.

Never? Never been in the sea.

No. We didn't seem to care very much for the sea.

Well, didn't you ever go in and out in?

Only with the charcoal.

Come on, you two. Up to bed now.

You'll get a chance, Marlady. If you don't get back to camp.

I'll put the lights out and lock up.

Right, sir.

Personally, I think it's a bit nippy in here.

I'm going to sleep me first. Good night, all.

I'm sorry, sir. We don't serve officers.

Why, the devil not.

Damned poor shell.

Lord, easily.

Well, I know.

I know.

I know.

I know.

I know.

I know.

I know.

I know.

I know.

I know.

I know.

I know.

I know.

I know.

I know.

I know.

I know.

Well, I know.

Mrs. Torter will be surprised.

I hope so, Mary.

Where is she?

No, they're not ready yet, Mary.

So, don't come in here.

We're in, mate.

And then I'm so sorry, Mrs. Torter.

Oh!

Oh!

Shall I?

Oh, you did not give me a turn.

Yeah, Mrs. Singer, finish off the mix.

Oh, well, I never did.

I'm singing you.

I work over here, didn't you know?

Yeah, so, wait.

Don't we, Mrs. Crockerd?

It's 50s, doesn't it, France, it's yesterday tea time.

No one knows Airman, he's sausage rolls.

Airman, then sausage rolls, will it?

4,200 this week, so far.

Yeah, God knows Airman, he's saying.

He's porridge chips by the underweight,

love tea and coffee to float the home flake.

Don't think you're mad.

He is so awake.

Barca, the lot of us.

Mad but magnific.

Whoa!

I've come to collect a fresh detachment

from the holding metallic.

Oh, well, when they come, they're coming here.

They all come in here.

Well, they're not due till tomorrow,

so I'm putting up at the hotel room.

I was hoping you could come house on dinner with me there.

Oh, well, no, I'm sorry, Charlotte.

I can't get away from this place.

We run off our feet, then the poor buggers miss the leaf boat.

We can manage your money, isn't it, Ma?

Now that we're organized, some of the service now,

we keep like coming into health anyway.

You sure?

Of course she's sure.

Anyway, it's an order.

We've been going through the sugar-like mad dogs.

Charlie, here's a near good lord.

Hello, Puffin.

I didn't expect to find you here.

How don't you know?

I'm having a round this canteen with Mrs Trotter.

You know Mrs. Of course you do.

Yes, yes, yes, please.

Well, tell me, how's Billy?

My billykins, oh, he's after something very important

at fourth court headquarters.

Of course, he's done his bit up at the front of being a regular.

They need him to everybody to plan everything.

He's a little new people.

Such amateurs.

Oh, not you, Charlie.

Not the guards.

He gets most weekends down here.

But he always seems so tired.

Oh, that's bad luck.

What's good luck, Charlie, is you turning up now.

Listen, Phoenicia and the Duchess are having a jolly little

shemi party tonight.

Two pay lots of jolly people coming.

Froggy and Monica and Juliet's over to see Marcy,

who has an odd sort of wound, if you ask me.

We won't go into that now.

And I need a handsome young man to escort me.

Oh, that does sound nice, Charlie.

A really jolly evening.

Look, I'm terribly sorry, Puffy,

but I'm afraid I've already got myself booked up.

I don't know what it is, it's a child.

No, no, no, absolutely respectable.

I'm terribly sorry, of course.

Oh, so am I.

I thought I could rely on you.

Excuse me.

Give my regards to Billy and see you again soon.

Yeah.

Oh, you fool, you are.

Nice jolly show me party with Phoenicia and the Duchess and, uh,

now, see, never know what that might lead to.

Louisa, are you having dinner with me or not?

It's Thursday, it'll be slack tonight.

All right.

Good.

I've ordered a taxi to pick you up with it.

I'll do it.

Of course.

Cheat, keep.

Hmm, aren't they?

I ain't got nothing to wear.

Smell like a chip shop.

I'll give you aunt.

It won't be the first time I've been your lady's mate.

Oh, bloody a scummy lap, oh, sorry, madam.

Oh, um, what's wrong with you?

Put my soda ganst to something.

Fine as hell of place to wash off.

We haven't all got maids and villas to go to.

Just as I would be in for a few days,

I've got a rush off to Paris to do a bit of shopping.

Night.

Good lights.

Good written sight, say.

Something I must snob, not really.

But she's all plessy as that taffy, not a brain and a red.

Cut them all more like.

After all this time, she hardly knows difference between a jam and a ham sandwich.

And she just can't get it into a red.

The 20 woodbains cost five cents.

Yeah, well, when she comes back, we'll end her back to it.

So, what's her name?

Mrs. Ploughton Bradley.

There's a long, long trail of winding into the land of my dreams.

Where the nightingales us.

Oh, yeah, that's very nice, Mary.

I remember the last time he did that for me.

I said you looked like a duchess, but he still do, man.

All my gas made on a night off.

I saw in the tattle, it's very chick to dress simply this year,

and jewelry is definitely in back form.

Oh, they said badges.

Here's my little badge.

There.

The text is here, Mrs. Dorta.

Oh, thanks, Jup.

All right.

Jup.

I love a lovely evening, right?

Yes, dear.

Yep.

When was that last time you told us you looked like a duchess, Mary?

That was a long time ago, Mrs. Cockwood, before your time.

They're not singing that song.

You didn't quite get that last line.

Was it too black for the girls?

No, Mrs. Volligweil, it was not.

It was not.

Yes, he must sit.

Set it to Lisa.

Yeah, that was a nice meal.

Mind you, I'm a bit off cooking.

After this, I don't think I've all got to look a fried egg in the eye again.

Put the lights out in a minute, Charlie.

What on earth for?

Oh, nothing's shocking.

It's a good time.

All right.

I should think that's platoon way.

Our gunners were signing a bit of a show just before I left.

That'll be the Bosch, countering.

How far is it?

40, 45 miles.

But watch it most nights.

It looks like a forest fire.

Yes.

But no one seems able or willing to put out.

We're here because we're here because we're here.

So, you really feel about the wall, is it?

We all do.

There's no point in it anymore.

It's just a huge, idiotic waste of life.

No more the night in shining armour, right?

He went west together with his white horse

and a great big black cloud of high explosive,

somewhere near Ginchey last September.

The day we lost 15 officers and 450 men.

I'm known as grandpa now or the old survivor.

I don't like new soldiers, have a nice, safe, big hit back home.

Lighty.

That's old history.

Did you know it was Hindu Sarni for help?

Yeah, I saw it before, is it?

No.

No, I couldn't leave.

Not well, actually, one piece and I haven't cracked up yet.

I hated really, but I couldn't leave it.

The battalion's the only real thing to me anymore.

Even today, I keep wondering what's happening there.

If the rations got up all right, Billin Knowles is doing.

It's crazy.

Young officer, just come out, join my company last week.

Going on his first raid.

Just about now.

You're meant to be like an old hen.

Yes.

Is it all in either this spring offensive they're all talking about?

Yeah, I suppose so.

Oh, they don't tell us anything.

We eat the air and rumoured crack.

Oh, well.

That's it, he's only room with him.

It's offensive every year.

Like the snowdrops, you know.

I'd like being shown like Helen's spray with machine gun bullets to get the winter shivers out of your bones.

Good for Morales, as a general.

Notly enough, it is.

We're all feeling chirpy already.

I don't know if anything's better than sitting in the cold, shivering, being sniped at.

Cursing the news.

And politicians, and profiteers, and pacifists.

And bishops.

They're the latest hate.

Especially the one who talks about death in battle as the great adventure.

Why were you right to him? Give him a good baller king.

He wouldn't understand.

I couldn't.

I couldn't even tell you all these things if we're in London.

I know I couldn't.

It's only because this place is a sort of no man's land for both of us.

Yeah, well.

He was always good at writing.

That's been not the truth.

Not even part of it.

I mean, not what I really think that is.

I suppose because life has become rather precarious,

every second seems so important.

I regret what a stuffy, useless, selfish fellow used to be.

He wasn't.

I was, really. Everything I did was for my own enjoyment.

Well, it wasn't the same. It was just the same.

Things had changed now.

It's over a bit for the better.

It's pathetic that it's taken a stupid, brutal war.

Scores of my own men killed, terribly wounded.

Incredible endurance and courage there is in people.

And unselfishness.

It's only that example that's kept me going.

Sorry, joying like this.

Must be the brandy.

Here.

Remember them wire cutters you asked me to get in your letter?

Oh, yes.

We've got them from the army and like the stores.

I was going to get the major.

Oh, see you later here.

Oh, marvellous.

You're the absolute the best.

Make all the difference.

Here you must be awfully tired.

The taxi will be waiting.

I'll come and see you in the morning.

There ain't no taxi.

I'll stop here.

I thought...

Oh, you haven't any night things.

Well, I got myself as a sin.

Got my own skin come to that.

They're good enough for you.

Been parking down that bloody buffet, I tell ya.

It's not often I get a nice cozy bar counter, keep me warm.

That'd have been, eh?

I ain't slept in one of them since I was a kid.

Yeah, that's nice and soft.

Goose, there's eight.

Lovely.

There's a few poo nights, is it about?

Nice, what are they?

Bed bugs, French for bed bugs, beef, hate, juicy bed bugs.

They don't off, make them eat.

I won't stay if you don't want me to.

Would you stay very much?

Not in anything in the world.

Don't accept me, will you?

Well, come on, then, let it go.

Well, it's just that I thought that long ago we'd agreed.

Well, to be great friends, leave it at that.

Just a frame out, absolutely, look back on it.

Yeah, well, always take things down at their frames and dust them down at me.

Oh, it's a pretty silly, tricky thing to say anyway.

Just seemed not the best thing at the time.

Seen the fix we was in.

What worked all out for a bit?

What I didn't reckon was that you were like the tooth, Hank.

I can't get rid of the thought of you.

And now, all I would like you said,

well, every second's precious and this is Tom Tiddler's Grand.

Well, I just thought like this, not...

Call the book.

Yeah.

I've never been on fact for you.

No one's crossed me out.

We must be mad.

Wasting all these years.

Yeah, now we had to wait.

I had to get the hotel out, me sister.

Oh, things are different now.

I had to be sure.

I was always sure.

Oh, I'm a sure me, not again.

And now, will you marry me?

Yeah.

It's all over.

When the guns are stopped.

We're still here.

We're still over too.

But I've always wanted you to.

Yeah, and I've always thought.

I've never been on a

You thought.

When you take me up to Yorkshire,

all them toughy-nose Yorkshire ladies say,

Paul Charlie's really copped at this time.

Got caught by that common cook woman from London,

over years.

You're jumping your fences too far.

We're going to be jumped sometime.

We're going to deliver visually.

Yes, we do.

All people up there on your estate, they miss you.

It will duties look after.

They need you as much as I do.

Let's stop doing things because what other people think of.

Just tonight.

I'm going to do what I think.

I'm going to do what I think.

Nice looking fories in tonight,

especially their masses.

But their language enough to set the place on fire.

Worse than Mrs. Tropper and that's saying something.

Still they don't mean any harm by it.

Oh, Mrs. Tropper, late.

You got a bed, Mrs. Cochran.

I lock her.

Right, I'll take the copper with me.

Hope she won't be too late.

I really want to know.

I don't want you to back.

I know he was special, but I didn't know.

She had that lock in.

I haven't seen it for years.

Well, well.

Good luck to him.

That's what I say.

Night, Mary.

Night.

Nine pounds, four shawoms and frottums.

Thanks, Jock.

Mary.

Yes?

I might not be able to get in tomorrow.

Doesn't matter.

Well, in fact, I might not be back for quite a while.

Have you been posted?

Yeah, that's right.

I'm off with a draft in the morning.

Oh, really, Sue?

Any cocoa left?

Yes, of course.

I'd just like to see Mary.

Well, I've never met a girl like you before.

I mean, you're just a saint.

Come on.

That's two honisters.

There we have.

You saw me take that money, didn't you?

Yes?

I've never stolen a penny in my life before, never.

Here, I'll give it to you back.

No, keep it if you need a Jock.

Be you're not more than that.

I just wish you'd asked for it this home.

Well, I couldn't.

Oh, I have or not.

Mary, I know you're not telling me.

But you see, I've been lying on it.

But you see, I've been lying all this time.

Well, I'm not...

Mary, I'm a deserber.

But, Jock, you mean you're from the way?

Well, there's plenty to do that, they say.

And not always to blame.

There's a few of us here.

We mostly live in rough, but the south basin.

Some froggies as well.

What happened?

Oh, come on, Jock, you can tell me.

Well, we were in one of the new divisions.

We got pushed up into song battle last July.

Nobody knew what it was like.

But we were pathetic, just a mob.

Well, we had to go and hold a wood, that was the orders.

But hardly arrived when the shell just like hell.

The officer was killed and it was bloody chaos.

Vraining and misty.

So we got on the stretch, the edge of the wood, and it was dead jerry's

and how dead blokes all over the place.

A lot of taffys.

It could be in your brother's lot, Mary.

Anyway, an officer comes along and he's gone.

He says we're at hold the line, but there was only three of us.

And there was a sergeant wounded in the trees.

Grown in.

So we set out to get him, but he was bad off.

And said to shoot him.

We couldn't do that.

And just then, there was a crack someplace.

And my mate Hamish got it here.

So I got back in the trench and it was getting dark

and the began to stonk it like hell.

Two Irish blokes ran along saying that the jerry's were coming

and these had orders to scoot out of it.

Well, so I just legged it after them.

Ran and ran like hell in a real panic.

Well, when light came, I was way back among the old lines.

I thought my rifle had mussed him a kit.

And I just sat there in a sort of daze.

Well, they told us the order.

Disaster in the face of the enemy court martial firing scored no excuses.

Is that true?

The shitting them up with the boring every morning.

That was a bloody idiot.

If I go back to an officer then, I might have got away with it.

But the thought of that would.

Can't you get in a ship or something?

Well, that's what most of them try and do.

Well, I couldn't go home, Mary.

My mother's not well and my father's very strict.

Very strict.

He'd not stick for it.

That's a good answer.

Anyways, too late.

Well, the bloody MPs picked me up today, wasn't the scene of pay book.

I said it was up at the camp.

Well, they've got me.

I mean, they've got me number.

They could pick me up anytime.

I've got to run for it.

Well, I'd best scoot off now.

I think you best spend the night here.

They'll get you in the end, Jock. You know they will.

You've nowhere else to go.

You'll be safe here.

And in the morning, when the Major comes down from St. Orm up, we'll ask him.

He'll know what to do for the best.

But he's an officer and you want me to trust him on my life.

You trusted me with a Jock.

Now, come on. I'll find you some blankets.

Easy as he can do about me.

I'll sell it to him on iTunes or even the Mac.

operating a LOT of years ago.

Let's take a look.

There was nothing next week, but it's it.

I mean, after all he's done for us, Major, I'm so young.

No, Mary.

I mean, it's absolutely nothing I can do.

Well, you could see him. Talk to him.

That'd be better than nothing.

Yeah, I don't let you from star.

Our hotel's ready to open Monday week.

Try to get back.

Oh, yes, of course. What about this place?

Oh, I fixed it. Salvation's going to take it over.

I'm not having that woman here.

And I want that official from that general of yours.

I understood.

Or I'll make it.

I remember.

I'll write it down.

Hey, if you talk to him, come here.

Please! All right, all right. I'm coming.

Major, about Jock.

Where is he?

Over there in the store room.

I'm very sorry, I am.

There's nothing I can do.

You know what I think?

Sir?

Face the museum?

Best way.

Only way, right?

Yes, sir.

Reksey Wall.

How will I, John?

Eighteen, sir.

How old were you when you were joined up?

Not quite seventeen, sir.

Not.

I'm still a credit.

Yes, sir.

I'll see what I can do.

I'll be about to laugh.

Oh, hello, Major. You've seen the general? That was quick?

No, but I shall quite soon.

Well, don't forget.

No, I've tried a knot in my manager.

Tomorrow morning, you'll get on the eleven o'clock leave, Bert.

I can't get you a pass or anything.

But I'm going on the boat. You can carry some of my luggage.

Follow me up the gangway.

If you're caught, I won't know you.

I can't get involved.

No, sir. Of course not.

When you get to Folkestone, you tell us some civvies,

go to the recruiting depot and enlist.

Give them your real name at age.

When you've sworn the oath, tell the officer the truth.

Everything.

Everything?

Yes.

Make it quite clear that you were underage when you first joined up.

With any luck, there'll only be some sort of brief inquiry.

There have been several cases like this recently.

And we are very short of soldiers.

That's all I want, sir. A second chance.

I hope you'll get it.

So fifty-fifty chance, that's it.

Me and my leader better stay here.

All right?

Right, sir.

Thanks, Mary.

Good luck.

Hey, sir.

I got off.

You're too blooming like, look at this.

Oh, sir.

All but the bleeding boat.

Official.

Guess what that is.

Good Lord.

Pass is canceled.

Leave the war zone by Friday.

It's from one of your mates, have a red quarters.

The Anderson General, something to do with me.

A very important trap.

Can't argue with him.

Well, if you can't, I can.

But, Louisa, you're going back anyway.

Yeah, I know, but on my own terms, not like this.

This agitator general, whatever he's called.

I've been sitting down here since Christmas.

When am I going to see the general?

When he's disengaged.

Now, listen, am I?

Oh, have you known, madam, that you're very lucky to be seeing him at all?

Well, it's important.

It's serious.

That is his baby.

But civilian complaints are usually handled by one of his deputies.

After they've been stated in writing and giving at least a week's notice.

Well, I ain't got a week.

And that's his fault.

And if I don't get satisfaction, I should not to generalize himself.

And you can tell your general that from me.

The general will see you now, madam.

Please be as brief as possible.

He's a very busy man.

Mrs. Potter, is there?

No, I think we've voted to him.

Well, Mrs. Potter, is there?

Well, Mrs. Potter, and what are your complaints?

That you are turning me out of France without rhyme or reason, and not one word of th-

No, we're so pey.

So pey, Joe, well, I never did.

I don't know, I don't know.

How's I to connect this?

Trouble some ogre of Mrs. Potter running a canteen and blind with you.

Well, how indeed, are you?

You've come up in the world, aren't you?

Worst job in the army discipline?

D.C. Fanny, yeah, that's funny coming from you.

Well, of course you've only seen me at play.

Tell me, now what he's all this about.

Well, I don't know. That's what I'm asking you.

Well, I haven't the foggiest idea. I just signed things.

Well, come on, I mean, we're...

Do sit down.

No. Right.

Well, it's going to be.

Yeah.

Now, then, let's look at the fire and see what all this is.

I'm going to ignore it.

Well, here we are.

Now, it is a legend, Mrs. Potter, that you are a bad influence on the troops,

but you're just sort of a good order and middle-of-the-discipline.

In that, on many occasions, you did use foul language yourself in your canteen.

Got me? Use foul language?

I've heard of.

Secondly, that on one occasion, you washed your hair in the sink.

Oh, yeah.

That's their puffing, telling tales.

And thirdly, that you are an immoral woman,

in that you spent the night in the hotel loove with an officer.

Oh, yeah.

What happened to that little girl you bought back there hotel?

You remember when he was last on leave?

When your wife was up in Scotland?

That little dancer from the hippodram.

Oh, what a little darling.

No, I'm not here.

Oh, dear. Well, Uncle, the reason I'm sorry about all this...

Oh, it don't matter.

What about a little drop of whiskey?

Yeah, wouldn't say no.

Nobody ever tells me anything. I don't know what goes on.

Some blithering idiot of a minion.

I'll tell you his name, and I'll kept him windy bakes.

Windy?

Not that chap, Windom brag.

Oh, Lord.

Well, what should we do with him?

Send him back to England.

Yeah, why don't we let him bully his own sex for change?

The Germans sold up at the front.

Good idea.

And what about that woman who seems to have been somewhat jealous of you?

Mrs. Farting brightly.

Mrs. Farting brightly.

What should we do with her?

Send her back to sorry where she came from.

Then you can pack off on Mrs. Billy Fitzsimmons and all.

Guys, by the name of Puffing, you'll find her in the Ritz hotel, Paris.

It's splendid.

And you can stay as long as you like.

From what I hear, you're doing a marvelous job.

Oh, no, no. I'm off anyway.

You got me getting the old hotel ship shape?

From where new nicks come on, leave.

Now, I'm going to end the old caboodle over the sunny end.

There, good luck.

Yeah.

You better have this.

We're all about it.

420 pounds.

Profit.

Oh, voluntary.

Couldn't help wanking it.

But that's marvelous.

Now, you spent on this whole just mind.

Not brand-in cigars for you and General Heig.

I've probably.

Well, maybe just once a guy, all right?

Yeah, well, I better get off.

You get on with a war.

I wish you stayed with you.

You know, with you what the hell we might actually win the war.

Yeah.

Sorry.

No.

Oh, um, by the way, I believe I still owe you a little bit, uh,

Louisa, for that last party in the hotel.

Oh, don't you worry about that, Sophie.

Uh, well, leave that to you for one more.

All right, I'll see if you've just tried to do it.

I can't.

Yes, sir.

There you go, apocalypse.

Yeah.

Great luck.

All right, there you go.

Actually, I'll have to bang on you.

Come on, look.

Okay, okay, okay, okay.

Oh, oh.

And the jolly good fellow, the jolly good fellow,

And the jolly good fellow, the jolly good fellow,

And the jolly good fellow, the jolly good fellow,

And the jolly good fellow, the jolly good fellow,

And the jolly good fellow, the jolly good fellow,

And the jolly good fellow, the jolly good fellow,

And the jolly good fellow, the jolly good fellow,

And the jolly good fellow, the jolly good fellow,

The jolly good fellow, the jolly good fellow,

The jolly good fellow, the jolly good fellow,

The jolly good fellow, the jolly good fellow,

And the jolly good fellow, the jolly good fellow,

And the jolly good fellow, the jolly good fellow,

And the jolly good fellow, the jolly good fellow,

And the jolly good fellow, the jolly good fellow,

With the jolly good fellow, the jolly good fellow,

And the jolly good fellow, of the jolly good fellow,

And the jolly good fellow, the jolly good fellow,

Go Kathy, wanna sing it?

Melk, sing it Missa, boys.

five, eight, a separation is as close as we can to you

What do you think of that then?

It's really lovely, isn't it?

Something to treasure that is.

Yeah, we'll frame that.

Hang it on the wall.

They're all dumb by us. We're mean without there, Elp.

They're about jock, are you elderly?

How do you know? They're good, sir.

They've taken him back.

Oh, that's good, Mary.

And what about the major? He was the biggest help of all.

I'd say what's that about me?

Oh, he's just saying, uh...

Well, a lovely chucky was, Major.

Look at that.

Impressive. We deserve it.

It's out.

Incidentally, Louisa, you seem to have impressed the powers that be.

Chief of Staff wants to know if you'd be willing to allow part of this

to tell them to become a convalescent home for wounded officers.

Oh, I bet that then.

What are you two think?

Why not?

Why not, indeed?

We've done a bit for the Thomas.

Nast the tale of the officers.

Oh, this is going to need a deal of organizing.

Here, we're going to need camp beds,

mattresses and pillars.

Now, this is your job, Major.

Don't forget, Mary, you can deal with the linen and the blankets.

We're going to need some pretty girls.

Well, I look after that.

How about having old Joe Henry Neil for seeing some of that?

Hey, we're going to need a lot of booze and all.