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Previously on Crazy Ex-Girlfriend...
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00:00:03,688 --> 00:00:05,221
REBECCA: Greg, listen,
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00:00:05,223 --> 00:00:06,272
I care about you.
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00:00:06,274 --> 00:00:07,557
Tell me...
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00:00:07,559 --> 00:00:09,392
tell me how you feel,
if you have any feelings.
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00:00:09,394 --> 00:00:11,445
I need-I need to... to take...
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00:00:11,470 --> 00:00:13,303
- I need to take a nap.
- Greg?
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Rebecca, no matter what I do...
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... I feel you with me.
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00:00:20,899 --> 00:00:23,366
Why don't you... leave
a few things here?
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00:00:23,368 --> 00:00:24,487
I have plenty of room.
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Just put it in one of my drawers.
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00:00:27,573 --> 00:00:29,718
Is that Greg's sweatshirt?
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00:00:29,875 --> 00:00:31,741
I am looking for Greg.
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00:00:31,743 --> 00:00:33,076
I really need to find him.
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I need to speak to your son, Greg.
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Look, there he is, there he is!
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00:00:37,601 --> 00:00:39,082
Hi, I'm Greg,
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00:00:39,084 --> 00:00:40,375
and I'm an alcoholic.
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I'm addicted to her life.
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00:00:42,638 --> 00:00:45,422
It's like I... did
another fist full of blow.
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00:00:45,424 --> 00:00:47,090
- What's this?
- Okay,
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00:00:47,092 --> 00:00:49,092
just a simple contract laying
out the terms of our friendship.
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00:00:49,094 --> 00:00:50,594
It stipulates that my
services as a friend
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00:00:50,619 --> 00:00:51,951
exclude shenanigans.
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00:00:51,976 --> 00:00:53,776
There's just still
something missing in my life.
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00:00:54,206 --> 00:00:56,117
I just... and I don't know what it is.
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GREG: Once I took my very first drink,
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I felt bulletproof.
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00:01:04,972 --> 00:01:07,973
For the first time in my life,
I didn't care about anything.
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00:01:07,975 --> 00:01:09,775
About how people felt, about how I felt,
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00:01:09,777 --> 00:01:11,343
about what was going
on with my mom and dad.
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Alcohol became my shield.
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And it worked.
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At least I thought it
worked until 27 days ago.
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00:01:20,154 --> 00:01:21,961
Thanks for bringing
the donuts this week.
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00:01:21,986 --> 00:01:22,985
You bet, man.
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00:01:23,207 --> 00:01:24,507
And thank you for sharing, dude.
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Oh, thanks, Guardrail.
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"Guardrail," is that because
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you were conceived on
the open road, or...
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Nah, my buddy Throttle gave me that name
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00:01:30,531 --> 00:01:32,898
because I was so
overprotective of my coke.
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(chuckling): Those were the days.
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00:01:34,867 --> 00:01:36,450
- So, things going okay?
- With me?
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Yeah, weirdly enough,
I'm doing all right.
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Feel my feelings, yadda yadda.
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I remember how good I felt
when I first got sober.
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- Almost euphoric.
- Exactly.
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Then I found it was just a phase.
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We call it the pink cloud.
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When that went away, I had
to deal with some rough stuff.
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Listen, thank you for the indirect,
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passive-aggressive warning,
but I'm coming to the meetings,
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I'm doing great.
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00:01:57,187 --> 00:01:59,137
Hey, tell you what, how about
I bring the donuts next time?
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Uh, okay, cool.
58
00:02:03,179 --> 00:02:04,812
You know we really love our donuts here.
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I'm on it.
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00:02:06,065 --> 00:02:07,695
What could possibly stop me?
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00:02:08,067 --> 00:02:10,368
- (humming)
- (door opening, closing)
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(sings indistinctly)
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Oh, hey, Josh! How was karate?
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Were you the best one there?
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00:02:14,290 --> 00:02:15,456
Becks, the only person
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I'm trying to be better than
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is the person I was yesterday.
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00:02:18,244 --> 00:02:19,910
- Mm.
- And today, I kicked
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Yesterday Josh's ass!
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00:02:21,414 --> 00:02:22,413
Yeah, you did!
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00:02:22,415 --> 00:02:23,831
Oh. Oh!
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00:02:23,833 --> 00:02:25,666
(moans)
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Mmm, what smells so good?
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Oh, I made you something.
75
00:02:29,437 --> 00:02:31,389
It's called noodle kugel.
76
00:02:31,391 --> 00:02:32,757
It's a Jewish thing. I
figured, I don't know,
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I've had your people's food.
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00:02:33,810 --> 00:02:34,975
You've never had my people's food.
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It's delicious.
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00:02:36,366 --> 00:02:37,398
It's my bubbe's recipe.
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Oh, bubbe would've hated you.
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She was really racist.
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It was a different
time, but still... wrong.
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00:02:42,489 --> 00:02:43,821
Anyway, you hungry?
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Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know.
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I had a sushi burrito after karate.
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00:02:48,234 --> 00:02:50,414
Oh, that's okay. No worries.
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00:02:50,439 --> 00:02:51,914
See, that's what I love about you.
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00:02:51,939 --> 00:02:53,391
- You love me?
- Love about you.
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Love about me... right,
right, right, got it.
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Like, I know that you're
not gonna get mad at me,
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00:02:56,417 --> 00:02:58,200
because I didn't eat the Jewish noodles.
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00:02:58,505 --> 00:02:59,718
We're independent.
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00:02:59,743 --> 00:03:01,242
You know, we come
together when we want to,
95
00:03:01,267 --> 00:03:03,984
and when we don't, we
stay in our own lanes.
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00:03:04,009 --> 00:03:06,171
Lanes, exactly! Exactly.
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00:03:06,367 --> 00:03:08,096
Uh, all right, so no kugel for now.
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00:03:08,098 --> 00:03:10,264
Do you want to watch a
movie just like in a chilling
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00:03:10,266 --> 00:03:12,567
in own... lanes type of way?
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00:03:12,569 --> 00:03:13,651
It's just, I-I don't know.
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00:03:13,653 --> 00:03:14,852
Feel like I haven't
seen you in a forever.
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00:03:14,854 --> 00:03:16,738
You've had a thing
every night this week.
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(groans) I have plans.
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Football at Hector's house.
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00:03:20,276 --> 00:03:21,554
And I know how you hate football.
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00:03:21,579 --> 00:03:22,628
I don't hate football.
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I-I get why it's fun, it just
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kind of propagates the
ideology of physical dominance
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and the economic subjugation
of the working poor.
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Plus the concussions. It
should be illegal, LOL.
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00:03:30,294 --> 00:03:31,877
(laughs) Um...
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What are you doing Friday?
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Shoot, Friday I got a thing.
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Just another guy thing.
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00:03:35,792 --> 00:03:37,828
But, Josh, that's the
thing... I love guy stuff.
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I'm, like, such a guy.
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00:03:39,914 --> 00:03:41,968
When I was a kid, people
thought I was a guy all the time.
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It turned out I had a hormone imbalance.
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00:03:43,635 --> 00:03:46,365
It was a very, it was
a very... hard time.
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00:03:46,390 --> 00:03:48,755
But-but, yeah, I'm down to do whatever.
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00:03:48,757 --> 00:03:50,923
What are you doing Friday, broseph?
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00:03:50,925 --> 00:03:53,436
Just going to a new
place called The Paddle.
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00:03:53,461 --> 00:03:55,044
It's a Ping-Pong cocktaileria.
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It's pretty fun.
125
00:03:56,047 --> 00:03:57,580
Wait, hold on a second.
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00:03:57,582 --> 00:03:58,578
Did you say Ping-Pong?
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(glissando chimes)
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00:03:59,404 --> 00:04:01,273
Josh, shut up.
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00:04:01,298 --> 00:04:02,983
Shut up. Shut your stupid face.
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00:04:03,008 --> 00:04:03,974
- What... ?
- No,
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00:04:03,976 --> 00:04:06,007
Josh, shut up! Shut up right now!
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00:04:06,032 --> 00:04:07,114
You know that
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00:04:07,139 --> 00:04:09,306
I was a teenage Ping-Pong champion.
134
00:04:09,501 --> 00:04:11,835
I was the Junior Miss
Table Tennis Champion
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00:04:11,860 --> 00:04:13,843
for the Eastern Northern
Seaboard County District.
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00:04:13,868 --> 00:04:16,168
Seriously? The Junior
Miss Table Tennis Champion
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00:04:16,193 --> 00:04:18,276
for the Eastern Northern
Seaboard County District?
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00:04:18,346 --> 00:04:20,130
How do I not know that already?
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00:04:20,359 --> 00:04:22,531
I don't know. Maybe we
should hang out more.
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00:04:22,556 --> 00:04:24,222
Maybe we should live together. (laughs)
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00:04:24,247 --> 00:04:25,554
(both laughing)
142
00:04:25,579 --> 00:04:27,195
- Oh...
- Oh, yeah.
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00:04:27,220 --> 00:04:28,353
Yeah, it's true.
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00:04:28,378 --> 00:04:29,586
This is great.
145
00:04:29,611 --> 00:04:32,101
I mean, you should come by and
give us a few pointers, then.
146
00:04:32,126 --> 00:04:34,960
Oh, my God, I couldn't.
I'm-I'm so rusty, but okay!
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00:04:34,985 --> 00:04:35,992
Cool.
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00:04:37,891 --> 00:04:39,553
Yeah.
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00:04:41,734 --> 00:04:43,901
I'm just a girl in love
150
00:04:43,926 --> 00:04:45,926
La-la-la,
lovey-dove
151
00:04:45,928 --> 00:04:48,762
I can't be held
responsible for my actions
152
00:04:48,764 --> 00:04:50,180
She's an ingenue
153
00:04:50,182 --> 00:04:52,265
I have no underlying
issues to address
154
00:04:52,267 --> 00:04:54,818
I'm certifiably cute
and adorably obsessed
155
00:04:54,820 --> 00:04:56,686
They say love makes you crazy
156
00:04:56,688 --> 00:04:58,939
Therefore, you
can't call her crazy
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00:04:58,941 --> 00:05:00,941
'Cause when you call her crazy
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You're just calling her in love.
159
00:05:03,143 --> 00:05:04,842
Blam!
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00:05:06,001 --> 00:05:09,032
-- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe --
-- www.addic7ed.com --
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00:05:09,259 --> 00:05:11,168
(elevator bell dings,
indistinct chatter)
162
00:05:11,170 --> 00:05:13,336
Hello, men!
163
00:05:14,256 --> 00:05:15,422
What's with her?
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00:05:15,424 --> 00:05:17,040
I don't know, but I'll find out.
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00:05:17,042 --> 00:05:18,368
I'm her best friend.
166
00:05:18,627 --> 00:05:20,040
Everyone knows that, right?
167
00:05:20,065 --> 00:05:21,665
Everyone knows you say it.
168
00:05:22,712 --> 00:05:24,243
Same thing, right?
169
00:05:24,883 --> 00:05:27,050
(mouse clicking)
170
00:05:31,517 --> 00:05:32,766
Hey, babe. What's up?
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00:05:32,768 --> 00:05:34,067
Nothing. Never mind.
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If I told you,
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00:05:36,470 --> 00:05:37,752
it would, you know, violate
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00:05:37,754 --> 00:05:39,921
the no-shenanigans clause
of our friend contract.
175
00:05:40,360 --> 00:05:42,223
Oh. But basically, I have to learn
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00:05:42,225 --> 00:05:43,591
how to be, like, a competition-level
177
00:05:43,593 --> 00:05:44,893
Ping-Pong player in a day.
178
00:05:44,895 --> 00:05:47,145
Wow. Okay. Anyways, listen...
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00:05:48,732 --> 00:05:50,515
- (gasps) You're not!
- I am.
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00:05:50,782 --> 00:05:53,351
(gasps) I'm applying to law school!
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00:05:53,353 --> 00:05:55,103
- (screams)
- (laughing)
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00:05:55,105 --> 00:05:57,155
- Yes! Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!
- (both laughing)
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00:05:57,157 --> 00:05:59,991
BOTH: Law school! Esquire! Esquire!
184
00:05:59,993 --> 00:06:02,577
BOTH: Paula! Paula! Esquire!
Paula! Esquire... Paula.
185
00:06:02,602 --> 00:06:04,259
What word do you want to
chant? Just let me know.
186
00:06:04,284 --> 00:06:05,610
I can't choose. They're all awesome.
187
00:06:05,635 --> 00:06:07,101
Okay, listen. It doesn't matter.
188
00:06:07,126 --> 00:06:09,293
I need a letter of recommendation.
189
00:06:09,688 --> 00:06:11,870
Rebecca Nora Bunch,
would you do me the honor?
190
00:06:11,872 --> 00:06:14,172
Yes, yes, yes. A thousand times yes.
191
00:06:14,174 --> 00:06:15,623
- Oh. (laughs)
- (squeaks)
192
00:06:15,625 --> 00:06:16,875
(laughs)
193
00:06:16,877 --> 00:06:18,760
Oh, thank you. Thank you so much.
194
00:06:18,762 --> 00:06:20,378
Okay, I need that by Friday, okay?
195
00:06:20,380 --> 00:06:22,347
I'll get it done
today. Oh, God, Rebecca.
196
00:06:23,321 --> 00:06:25,216
Things are finally
starting to happen for me.
197
00:06:25,218 --> 00:06:26,601
You know?
198
00:06:26,603 --> 00:06:27,954
I can't believe it.
199
00:06:28,472 --> 00:06:32,557
My dreams might actually... come true.
200
00:06:33,563 --> 00:06:35,462
You so deserve it.
201
00:06:35,756 --> 00:06:37,774
- (laughing)
- PAULA: Mm.
202
00:06:37,799 --> 00:06:39,215
Okay.
203
00:06:39,316 --> 00:06:41,470
(sighs) Oh.
204
00:06:45,205 --> 00:06:47,372
(sighs)
205
00:06:49,076 --> 00:06:52,127
When I was a little girl
206
00:06:52,129 --> 00:06:54,496
I felt like a princess
207
00:06:54,498 --> 00:06:58,717
So naive and full of hope
208
00:06:58,719 --> 00:07:01,886
I thought my dreams
would come true
209
00:07:01,888 --> 00:07:04,305
But then as I grew
210
00:07:04,307 --> 00:07:06,758
The world was all like
211
00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:08,426
(giggles)
212
00:07:08,428 --> 00:07:09,800
Nope
213
00:07:10,647 --> 00:07:12,991
But this time, maybe,
214
00:07:13,503 --> 00:07:16,292
just maybe...
215
00:07:17,187 --> 00:07:19,187
(birds singing)
216
00:07:19,189 --> 00:07:24,275
Maybe this dream
won't lead to disgrace
217
00:07:24,277 --> 00:07:28,780
Maybe this dream is
218
00:07:28,782 --> 00:07:33,418
Maybe this dream
won't poop on my face
219
00:07:33,420 --> 00:07:38,039
Like a seagull at the beach
220
00:07:38,041 --> 00:07:42,677
Maybe this dream won't
be like my wedding
221
00:07:42,679 --> 00:07:46,514
The organ played
"There Goes the Bride"
222
00:07:46,516 --> 00:07:48,049
I came back.
223
00:07:48,051 --> 00:07:52,137
Maybe this dream won't
be like some maggots
224
00:07:52,139 --> 00:07:57,438
Feasting on the rotting
deer carcass of my pride
225
00:07:58,251 --> 00:08:01,863
Oh, oh-oh, oh, oh
226
00:08:01,865 --> 00:08:06,451
Maybe this dream won't
be like my vibrator
227
00:08:06,453 --> 00:08:09,454
Breaking when I need it most
228
00:08:09,456 --> 00:08:10,872
Tweedle deedle Dee!
229
00:08:10,874 --> 00:08:15,627
Maybe this dream
won't be like Ebola
230
00:08:15,629 --> 00:08:18,580
Eating the flesh of its host
231
00:08:18,582 --> 00:08:20,548
Tweedle deedle Doo!
232
00:08:20,550 --> 00:08:22,917
-
Maybe this dream won't be like
-
Tweet-tweet, tweet-tweet
233
00:08:22,919 --> 00:08:25,220
-
When I go running
-
Tweet, tweet, tweet
234
00:08:25,222 --> 00:08:27,338
And I have to take a dump
235
00:08:27,340 --> 00:08:29,591
So I have to rush home
236
00:08:29,593 --> 00:08:31,874
Plus I also have my period
237
00:08:31,899 --> 00:08:34,729
So I have menstrual
cramps plus dump cramps
238
00:08:34,731 --> 00:08:37,315
And as I run frantically
239
00:08:37,317 --> 00:08:39,517
I pee just a little
240
00:08:39,519 --> 00:08:41,519
Because I've had two babies
241
00:08:41,521 --> 00:08:43,771
So by the time I get home
242
00:08:43,773 --> 00:08:47,985
My undies smell like a sewer rat
243
00:08:48,643 --> 00:08:55,047
Maybe this dream
won't be like that
244
00:08:57,126 --> 00:09:03,837
Maybe this dream will
finally make me feel
245
00:09:04,219 --> 00:09:10,376
Like I deserve
246
00:09:10,967 --> 00:09:13,885
A...
247
00:09:13,887 --> 00:09:20,774
Dream.
248
00:09:26,199 --> 00:09:28,399
(sighs)
249
00:09:29,236 --> 00:09:31,402
(phone ringing)
250
00:09:32,297 --> 00:09:34,383
Paula Proctor. How may I help you?
251
00:09:41,259 --> 00:09:44,187
No, don't even worry about
it. It's my pleasure. Yeah.
252
00:09:44,212 --> 00:09:45,711
Okay. Nope. Thank you.
253
00:09:48,243 --> 00:09:50,305
Rebecca told me you're
applying to law school.
254
00:09:50,330 --> 00:09:51,663
- Ee!
- And so...
255
00:09:52,352 --> 00:09:54,757
I took the liberty of writing you
256
00:09:54,782 --> 00:09:56,482
A recommendation.
257
00:09:56,484 --> 00:09:59,438
Oh. Well, um, here's the thing.
258
00:09:59,463 --> 00:10:01,555
Rebecca's actually doing it for me,
259
00:10:01,580 --> 00:10:03,122
'cause, I mean, we're besties.
260
00:10:03,147 --> 00:10:04,563
- So...
- Oh. My... Yeah. Yeah.
261
00:10:04,588 --> 00:10:06,149
Of course. Of course. I understand.
262
00:10:06,174 --> 00:10:08,341
I mean, you and I are best
friends, and she's your bestie.
263
00:10:08,358 --> 00:10:09,774
Whatever that is.
264
00:10:09,776 --> 00:10:12,526
But you know what? If you
need a second recommendation,
265
00:10:12,528 --> 00:10:14,028
consider it done.
266
00:10:14,030 --> 00:10:16,247
No. Here's the thing. I don't.
267
00:10:16,249 --> 00:10:18,922
So, um, but, like, thank you.
268
00:10:18,947 --> 00:10:19,837
Well, that's cool. That's cool.
269
00:10:19,862 --> 00:10:22,063
I'll just hang on to this, and...
270
00:10:22,372 --> 00:10:23,871
you know, maybe do another draft,
271
00:10:23,873 --> 00:10:25,368
another polish, as they say.
272
00:10:25,393 --> 00:10:26,809
- Okay. Yeah.
- Yeah.
273
00:10:26,834 --> 00:10:29,251
Yeah. Everything could always
use a little improvement.
274
00:10:29,295 --> 00:10:30,928
Just like a friendship.
275
00:10:30,930 --> 00:10:32,763
(elevator bell dings)
276
00:10:33,549 --> 00:10:35,716
- Can I help you?
- Hi.
277
00:10:35,718 --> 00:10:36,934
I'm Xiao Huang,
278
00:10:36,936 --> 00:10:39,887
2016 San Gabriel Valley
Junior Table Tennis Champion.
279
00:10:40,300 --> 00:10:41,726
Do you know where I can find...
280
00:10:41,751 --> 00:10:42,773
REBECCA: Ooh, ooh!
That's mine! That's mine!
281
00:10:42,775 --> 00:10:44,775
He's with me! He's with
me! Hi, I'm Rebecca.
282
00:10:44,777 --> 00:10:45,943
Hi. Do you need coffee
283
00:10:45,945 --> 00:10:47,728
before we get started? Espresso? No.
284
00:10:47,730 --> 00:10:49,730
I just think if it's really meant to be,
285
00:10:49,732 --> 00:10:52,283
you don't need to manufacture
some fake enthusiasm
286
00:10:52,285 --> 00:10:53,734
for Josh's hobby.
287
00:10:53,868 --> 00:10:56,621
Isn't a relationship all
about meeting in the middle?
288
00:10:56,727 --> 00:10:59,991
Okay, Dr. Ruth, I'm
paying you for Ping-Pong,
289
00:10:59,993 --> 00:11:02,410
not the hokey-pokey
about the hanky-panky.
290
00:11:02,782 --> 00:11:04,745
Oh, that's funny. Should I tweet that?
291
00:11:04,747 --> 00:11:05,913
Let's just get back to Ping-Pong.
292
00:11:05,915 --> 00:11:06,914
How do I hold the paddle?
293
00:11:06,916 --> 00:11:08,749
Do I hold it like this or like this?
294
00:11:08,751 --> 00:11:10,134
You hold it like this.
295
00:11:11,157 --> 00:11:12,740
No, wait, I look dumb.
296
00:11:12,742 --> 00:11:14,608
I need to look hot. Can you do that?
297
00:11:14,610 --> 00:11:16,571
Sexy Ping-Pong. Copy that.
298
00:11:16,596 --> 00:11:18,045
Cool.
299
00:11:20,501 --> 00:11:21,833
There he is.
300
00:11:21,835 --> 00:11:23,585
Mr. Leaving Las Vegas,
301
00:11:23,587 --> 00:11:25,253
but with an inspirational ending.
302
00:11:25,255 --> 00:11:26,471
Kev, don't.
303
00:11:26,473 --> 00:11:28,807
I get it. You want to
downplay your courage.
304
00:11:28,809 --> 00:11:30,258
I understand.
305
00:11:30,260 --> 00:11:31,560
I'm just so proud of you, man.
306
00:11:31,562 --> 00:11:33,678
You inspired me to quit kettle chips.
307
00:11:33,680 --> 00:11:35,097
That's my gateway drug.
308
00:11:35,099 --> 00:11:37,149
That's not a drug. It's a potato.
309
00:11:37,151 --> 00:11:40,102
Also, you no longer have to
serve alcoholic beverages.
310
00:11:40,337 --> 00:11:43,522
And... I've taken beer-battered
shrimp off the menu.
311
00:11:43,524 --> 00:11:45,282
Oh, God.
312
00:11:45,307 --> 00:11:47,094
Hey, Greg. Heard you finally
313
00:11:47,119 --> 00:11:48,554
figured out you're an alcoholic.
314
00:11:48,579 --> 00:11:49,694
I'm happy for you.
315
00:11:49,696 --> 00:11:51,863
- Thanks?
- Yeah, I had an ex-boyfriend
316
00:11:51,865 --> 00:11:53,665
who went to rehab for his Oxy addiction.
317
00:11:53,667 --> 00:11:55,450
Lot of ups and downs.
318
00:11:55,452 --> 00:11:57,753
- May he rest in peace.
- He died?
319
00:11:57,755 --> 00:11:59,254
No, but I hope he does.
320
00:11:59,256 --> 00:12:01,373
He stole a lot of 20s out of my purse.
321
00:12:01,727 --> 00:12:03,375
Anyway, I'm pulling for you, buddy.
322
00:12:03,377 --> 00:12:04,241
We all are.
323
00:12:04,266 --> 00:12:06,688
Guys, I appreciate your
support, but can we just...
324
00:12:06,915 --> 00:12:09,992
do our jobs and not
talk about this so much?
325
00:12:10,017 --> 00:12:11,967
I understand. We should
keep things normal.
326
00:12:11,969 --> 00:12:13,468
That's what we should do. Yeah.
327
00:12:14,115 --> 00:12:15,563
Listen up, gang!
328
00:12:15,913 --> 00:12:17,362
Be normal!
329
00:12:17,724 --> 00:12:19,391
Greg does not want
to treated differently
330
00:12:19,393 --> 00:12:21,133
for his alcohol addiction!
331
00:12:21,158 --> 00:12:22,607
So, be cool.
332
00:12:23,195 --> 00:12:24,399
Be cool.
333
00:12:25,699 --> 00:12:27,904
Emergency meeting called by Serrano...
334
00:12:27,906 --> 00:12:29,484
Did you tell him about you and Rebecca?
335
00:12:29,509 --> 00:12:30,430
You said you were gonna.
336
00:12:30,455 --> 00:12:32,288
I haven't seen him, no one has.
337
00:12:32,345 --> 00:12:34,629
He hasn't been around. I will tell him
338
00:12:34,631 --> 00:12:36,797
- at some point.
- Gentlemen.
339
00:12:36,799 --> 00:12:38,299
What do you think Serrano wants?
340
00:12:38,301 --> 00:12:40,897
Uh, I don't know.
Maybe we should ask him,
341
00:12:40,922 --> 00:12:43,187
since he's right there. He's...
342
00:12:43,189 --> 00:12:45,139
waving us over? 'Sup, man?
343
00:12:45,141 --> 00:12:46,807
You ghosted on us. Where you been?
344
00:12:46,809 --> 00:12:47,692
Yeah, what's this meeting about?
345
00:12:47,694 --> 00:12:49,477
Okay, guys, give him a break.
346
00:12:49,479 --> 00:12:52,113
He's trying to tell us.
Greg, whatever this is,
347
00:12:52,115 --> 00:12:55,116
it concerns all of us. Or... right?
348
00:12:55,118 --> 00:12:58,286
Y-You asked us all to come
here because, uh, you...
349
00:12:58,288 --> 00:13:01,454
I mean, you're not putting any
one individual on blast, right?
350
00:13:01,981 --> 00:13:02,977
Dude,
351
00:13:03,126 --> 00:13:05,212
- what?
- Shh! Let him talk.
352
00:13:05,237 --> 00:13:06,987
Greg, you have the floor.
353
00:13:07,012 --> 00:13:08,261
Sit down, guys.
354
00:13:11,190 --> 00:13:13,240
Here's the thing. I'm...
355
00:13:13,265 --> 00:13:14,631
sorry I've been M.I.A.
356
00:13:14,945 --> 00:13:16,687
And that I lied to you.
357
00:13:17,126 --> 00:13:20,024
My mom didn't have
botched plastic surgery.
358
00:13:20,343 --> 00:13:23,010
Though she did get her nose done
recently and it looks amazing.
359
00:13:23,012 --> 00:13:24,743
But the truth is,
360
00:13:24,804 --> 00:13:27,504
I have been dealing with some things.
361
00:13:29,352 --> 00:13:30,401
Like?
362
00:13:30,403 --> 00:13:31,986
Like I got a DUI,
363
00:13:31,988 --> 00:13:33,688
spent a night in jail,
turns out I'm an alcoholic.
364
00:13:33,690 --> 00:13:35,406
I've been going to meetings
and I'm trying to stay sober.
365
00:13:35,408 --> 00:13:37,575
That's it, bingo, bango, done. Beers?
366
00:13:38,593 --> 00:13:39,459
Wow.
367
00:13:39,696 --> 00:13:42,524
Wow, dude, this is... heavy.
368
00:13:42,549 --> 00:13:44,999
I know. It's a shock, right?
369
00:13:45,201 --> 00:13:46,417
Eh...
370
00:13:46,977 --> 00:13:48,869
Or not a shock.
371
00:13:49,188 --> 00:13:51,587
Yeah, no, not really.
Sort of saw that coming.
372
00:13:51,612 --> 00:13:52,861
I'm shocked.
373
00:13:52,959 --> 00:13:56,177
A-And upset. Greg, I'm sorry.
374
00:13:56,179 --> 00:13:57,962
I'm so... sorry.
375
00:13:57,964 --> 00:13:59,213
I feel terrible.
376
00:13:59,215 --> 00:14:01,966
If I did anything to
contribute to this in any way...
377
00:14:01,968 --> 00:14:04,051
- What?
- I-I... In...
378
00:14:04,053 --> 00:14:06,354
I was the one with the
fake ID in high school.
379
00:14:06,356 --> 00:14:08,806
At every party, I would dare
you to drink the whole bottle
380
00:14:08,808 --> 00:14:10,618
because I thought it
was funny or something.
381
00:14:10,817 --> 00:14:13,040
God, I don't know if I can
live with myself anymore.
382
00:14:13,065 --> 00:14:14,815
Weirdly, this isn't about you.
383
00:14:14,840 --> 00:14:17,321
It's okay. Don't give Josh a hard time.
384
00:14:17,400 --> 00:14:18,899
My sponsor, Guardrail...
385
00:14:18,901 --> 00:14:21,068
That's his biker name.
It's a long story.
386
00:14:21,070 --> 00:14:22,319
He has a friend named Throttle.
387
00:14:22,321 --> 00:14:23,738
It's a very colorful group of people.
388
00:14:23,740 --> 00:14:25,790
I-I'm not supposed to
say names, but I think
389
00:14:25,792 --> 00:14:27,375
nicknames are okay, but just don't
390
00:14:27,377 --> 00:14:29,543
tell any of your biker
friends... Just cover our bases.
391
00:14:29,545 --> 00:14:31,245
But anyway, Guardrail said
392
00:14:31,247 --> 00:14:34,215
some people in my life would
take it harder than others.
393
00:14:34,217 --> 00:14:36,250
It's... it's all right, Josh.
394
00:14:36,252 --> 00:14:38,290
No one caused this.
395
00:14:38,806 --> 00:14:40,829
It's me. And I'm working on it.
396
00:14:41,507 --> 00:14:44,141
Well, I'm proud of you. Cheers, Greg.
397
00:14:44,143 --> 00:14:45,760
Don't cheers an alcoholic, dumb-ass.
398
00:14:45,762 --> 00:14:47,645
It's a light beer, idiot-ass.
399
00:14:47,647 --> 00:14:49,513
White Josh is right. I-I don't think
400
00:14:49,515 --> 00:14:50,899
we should be drinking around you.
401
00:14:50,924 --> 00:14:52,401
No, it's okay. I...
402
00:14:52,602 --> 00:14:53,934
You don't have the problem, I do.
403
00:14:54,102 --> 00:14:56,937
You guys can drink, I can't.
404
00:14:56,939 --> 00:14:58,516
Let me show you what I mean.
405
00:14:58,681 --> 00:15:00,847
Come on.
406
00:15:00,943 --> 00:15:02,943
(all exclaim)
407
00:15:02,945 --> 00:15:05,149
(all laughing)
408
00:15:05,448 --> 00:15:08,282
Gather ye 'round and
I'll tell you a tale
409
00:15:08,284 --> 00:15:10,334
Of all the great times
410
00:15:10,336 --> 00:15:12,420
I've had with an ale
411
00:15:12,422 --> 00:15:14,255
There's joy and there's glory
412
00:15:14,257 --> 00:15:16,006
More than you can think
413
00:15:16,008 --> 00:15:20,010
Yes, this is what
happens to me when I drink
414
00:15:20,930 --> 00:15:23,380
I pee my pants, my pants
415
00:15:23,382 --> 00:15:25,049
I pee my pants
416
00:15:25,051 --> 00:15:28,769
I get up from the bar
to find pee on my pants
417
00:15:28,771 --> 00:15:30,471
I say it's water
418
00:15:30,473 --> 00:15:32,106
But all it takes is a glance
419
00:15:32,108 --> 00:15:35,976
For people to realize
I peed my pants
420
00:15:35,978 --> 00:15:38,145
Wow, I did not know it was that bad.
421
00:15:38,147 --> 00:15:41,866
Yes, wine can be fun...
White, ros? and red
422
00:15:41,868 --> 00:15:45,202
Till I call up my boss,
say I wish he was dead
423
00:15:45,204 --> 00:15:48,789
Chase down the regret
with some gin for good luck
424
00:15:48,791 --> 00:15:52,460
Then steal my cousin
Jim's landscaping truck
425
00:15:52,462 --> 00:15:56,413
Drive home, then I
puke on my cat, my cat
426
00:15:56,415 --> 00:15:57,882
I puke on my cat
427
00:15:57,884 --> 00:16:01,669
I fall through the
doorway and puke on my cat
428
00:16:01,671 --> 00:16:04,722
Poor little Bruno
did not expect that
429
00:16:04,724 --> 00:16:08,759
I try for the toilet,
but puke on my cat
430
00:16:11,063 --> 00:16:13,314
While some can enjoy
431
00:16:13,316 --> 00:16:15,516
A scotch with a steak
432
00:16:15,839 --> 00:16:17,735
Or one glass of wine
433
00:16:17,737 --> 00:16:20,464
Then they're barely awake
434
00:16:20,768 --> 00:16:22,156
For me it's much different
435
00:16:22,158 --> 00:16:25,359
What happens when
436
00:16:25,361 --> 00:16:27,361
I try to have one
437
00:16:27,363 --> 00:16:29,530
It just turns into ten
438
00:16:29,532 --> 00:16:30,998
And then...
439
00:16:31,000 --> 00:16:32,867
I fly a plane
440
00:16:32,869 --> 00:16:35,586
A plane, I fly a plane
441
00:16:35,588 --> 00:16:37,505
I knock on the cockpit, shouting
442
00:16:37,507 --> 00:16:38,923
"I'll fly this plane"
443
00:16:38,925 --> 00:16:42,626
We emergency
landed, the TSA came
444
00:16:42,628 --> 00:16:46,213
Now I'm banned from Southwest
'cause I try to fly planes
445
00:16:46,215 --> 00:16:47,264
Everybody!
446
00:16:47,266 --> 00:16:49,099
MEN:
He has sex with a bush
447
00:16:49,101 --> 00:16:52,353
A bush, he has sex with a bush
448
00:16:52,355 --> 00:16:53,888
That wasn't a woman?
449
00:16:53,890 --> 00:16:55,606
MEN:
No, it was a bush
450
00:16:55,608 --> 00:16:59,643
It had twigs and leaves,
'cause it was a bush
451
00:16:59,645 --> 00:17:01,362
That's where that
scar comes from
452
00:17:01,364 --> 00:17:02,863
From sexing a bush
453
00:17:02,865 --> 00:17:06,400
But he's breaking the
cycle and making a push
454
00:17:06,402 --> 00:17:09,036
He's quitting his drinking
455
00:17:09,038 --> 00:17:10,905
And saving his pants
456
00:17:10,907 --> 00:17:13,457
And his cat and
Southwest and Jim's truck
457
00:17:13,459 --> 00:17:15,242
-
And my car
-
My car, too
458
00:17:15,244 --> 00:17:18,412
And the bush!
459
00:17:18,414 --> 00:17:19,830
(cheering, applause)
460
00:17:19,832 --> 00:17:21,827
I didn't do anything wrong. Yes!
461
00:17:21,852 --> 00:17:23,985
Again, not about you.
462
00:17:24,136 --> 00:17:26,086
(sighs)
463
00:17:26,088 --> 00:17:28,088
Dear God, thank you for this boba.
464
00:17:28,090 --> 00:17:30,341
Bless the hands that have
rolled these tapioca balls.
465
00:17:30,343 --> 00:17:32,760
Is that how boba is made? I'm not sure.
466
00:17:32,762 --> 00:17:34,929
Don't you only say grace before a meal?
467
00:17:34,931 --> 00:17:37,314
Boba is a drink that you eat.
468
00:17:37,316 --> 00:17:38,816
Okay, dude, listen.
469
00:17:38,818 --> 00:17:40,100
I'm in a rough place.
470
00:17:40,102 --> 00:17:42,353
Greg is an alcoholic.
471
00:17:42,355 --> 00:17:44,694
I can't tell him about me and Rebecca.
472
00:17:45,100 --> 00:17:46,857
He's in such a fragile state. I...
473
00:17:46,859 --> 00:17:48,442
I don't think he could handle it.
474
00:17:48,444 --> 00:17:50,444
- Okay, so...
- Now, I know what you're gonna say
475
00:17:50,446 --> 00:17:52,196
"Be honest, blah, blah, blah."
476
00:17:52,198 --> 00:17:53,530
You know, "Jesus likes honesty,
477
00:17:53,532 --> 00:17:54,865
blah, blah, blah."
478
00:17:54,867 --> 00:17:56,951
But Jesus didn't have
sex with his friend's ex.
479
00:17:56,953 --> 00:17:58,285
I mean, not that I know of, anyway.
480
00:17:58,287 --> 00:17:59,536
Maybe he did. I don't know.
481
00:17:59,538 --> 00:18:01,077
Josh, stop.
482
00:18:01,457 --> 00:18:04,375
I think your impulse to
not tell Greg is wise.
483
00:18:04,377 --> 00:18:05,452
And mature.
484
00:18:05,477 --> 00:18:07,071
What? No.
485
00:18:07,233 --> 00:18:08,545
Thank you. Really?
486
00:18:08,547 --> 00:18:10,547
Telling Greg would be selfish.
It would only alleviate
487
00:18:10,549 --> 00:18:12,600
your own guilt, blah, blah, blah,
488
00:18:12,602 --> 00:18:14,602
Which I guess is how I sound to you?
489
00:18:14,604 --> 00:18:15,585
Mm-hmm.
490
00:18:15,610 --> 00:18:17,810
Josh, you're right.
491
00:18:17,890 --> 00:18:19,940
Greg has a lot on his plate right now.
492
00:18:19,942 --> 00:18:21,038
Don't add to it.
493
00:18:21,063 --> 00:18:22,479
Wow.
494
00:18:22,561 --> 00:18:23,894
I'm right about this?
495
00:18:24,821 --> 00:18:26,340
Great. Because I really
496
00:18:26,365 --> 00:18:27,448
didn't want to tell him.
497
00:18:27,999 --> 00:18:29,984
Uh, well, uh, you are
gonna have a chance
498
00:18:29,986 --> 00:18:32,703
to practice not telling him right now.
499
00:18:34,323 --> 00:18:37,625
So... there's this thing in recovery
500
00:18:37,627 --> 00:18:40,544
where you own up to your mistakes.
501
00:18:40,546 --> 00:18:42,413
And I'm just starting to do that now,
502
00:18:42,415 --> 00:18:44,331
and I know I need to start with you.
503
00:18:44,333 --> 00:18:47,452
Oh, Greg, you do not have to do this.
504
00:18:47,477 --> 00:18:49,728
Please, just let me get this out.
505
00:18:50,675 --> 00:18:52,709
I am so sorry about the French fries.
506
00:18:54,022 --> 00:18:55,046
What?
507
00:18:55,071 --> 00:18:56,938
You know that time when we went out
508
00:18:56,963 --> 00:18:59,129
after seeing your
friend's terrible band,
509
00:18:59,710 --> 00:19:01,765
and you ordered French fries
510
00:19:01,767 --> 00:19:04,647
and I ate all of them
because I was wasted?
511
00:19:05,321 --> 00:19:08,507
When I think of myself
doing that, I am...
512
00:19:10,466 --> 00:19:12,046
That was so selfish of me.
513
00:19:12,889 --> 00:19:14,244
And I'm sorry.
514
00:19:14,421 --> 00:19:15,829
Wow, I'm really glad
515
00:19:15,831 --> 00:19:18,365
- you reached out about that.
- You are?
516
00:19:18,367 --> 00:19:20,200
No, I don't remember that at all,
517
00:19:20,202 --> 00:19:22,119
but I will take your French fry apology
518
00:19:22,121 --> 00:19:23,454
and apply it to other stuff.
519
00:19:23,456 --> 00:19:25,788
Okay. That works.
520
00:19:26,208 --> 00:19:28,042
Did he see me?
521
00:19:28,044 --> 00:19:29,877
- Mm-hmm. Yeah.
- He saw me? Okay, I'm gonna walk
522
00:19:29,879 --> 00:19:32,346
right up to him, say a quick
hello, and boom, I'm cool.
523
00:19:32,348 --> 00:19:33,964
Yeah. Dude, this is
gonna go great for you.
524
00:19:33,966 --> 00:19:35,182
Yeah.
525
00:19:35,741 --> 00:19:37,017
Oh, hey.
526
00:19:37,019 --> 00:19:39,603
Nice to see you guys. How are you?
527
00:19:39,605 --> 00:19:41,772
Hey, man, we didn't get
to talk much earlier.
528
00:19:41,774 --> 00:19:43,524
I heard about you and
Valencia... that's rough.
529
00:19:43,526 --> 00:19:44,775
Where are you staying?
530
00:19:44,777 --> 00:19:46,276
Wh... Where am I staying?
531
00:19:46,522 --> 00:19:48,217
Where do I...
532
00:19:48,710 --> 00:19:49,980
reside?
533
00:19:49,982 --> 00:19:51,949
Where do you hang your hat?
534
00:19:52,257 --> 00:19:53,283
Um...
535
00:19:53,285 --> 00:19:54,535
um...
536
00:19:54,537 --> 00:19:57,287
I have an Airbnb in Claremont.
537
00:19:57,553 --> 00:20:00,074
It belongs to a celebrity.
538
00:20:00,076 --> 00:20:02,076
He uses it as his weekend house.
539
00:20:02,078 --> 00:20:04,639
What celebrity weekends in Claremont?
540
00:20:04,696 --> 00:20:07,280
Oh, I'm not supposed to
tell anyone. I mean...
541
00:20:07,305 --> 00:20:09,188
It's Josh Hutcherson, but
you didn't hear that from me.
542
00:20:09,213 --> 00:20:10,379
(chuckles) Yeah, he goes there
543
00:20:10,404 --> 00:20:12,321
when he wants to feel
down to earth, yeah.
544
00:20:12,388 --> 00:20:13,921
Look, Josh, I know you're weirded out
545
00:20:13,923 --> 00:20:15,339
by the whole alcoholic thing.
546
00:20:15,341 --> 00:20:17,307
I know it's coming from
a place of friendship.
547
00:20:17,522 --> 00:20:18,288
Yeah.
548
00:20:18,313 --> 00:20:20,889
Thank you. I... I
think it's kind of nice.
549
00:20:23,420 --> 00:20:25,194
(loudly): I slept with Rebecca!
550
00:20:26,152 --> 00:20:28,068
Oh. There it is.
551
00:20:28,070 --> 00:20:30,154
I'm sorry, what? It was
the night of the wedding
552
00:20:30,156 --> 00:20:31,572
and I'm so sorry.
553
00:20:31,574 --> 00:20:33,663
You're really good at secrets, Josh.
554
00:20:33,688 --> 00:20:35,104
You slept with Rebecca that night.
555
00:20:36,924 --> 00:20:38,350
That makes sense.
556
00:20:39,007 --> 00:20:40,614
I was being a drunk jerk
557
00:20:40,616 --> 00:20:42,950
and abandoned her by blacking out.
558
00:20:42,952 --> 00:20:44,118
I can't blame you guys.
559
00:20:44,120 --> 00:20:46,120
- I-I have to take responsibility...
- Okay, wait.
560
00:20:46,122 --> 00:20:47,454
Before you forgive me, you should know
561
00:20:47,456 --> 00:20:49,790
it wasn't just the one time.
562
00:20:49,792 --> 00:20:51,210
It's been, uh...
563
00:20:51,235 --> 00:20:53,436
(muttering)
564
00:20:57,132 --> 00:20:58,682
- More than once.
- Yeah, um,
565
00:20:58,684 --> 00:21:01,051
it's been a lot of times, and
I'm sort of staying with her.
566
00:21:01,053 --> 00:21:03,604
And there is no celebrity
Airbnb in Claremont.
567
00:21:03,606 --> 00:21:05,186
I don't know famous
people. I wish I did.
568
00:21:05,211 --> 00:21:06,494
I mean, I sold a karaoke
machine to Michael Madsen
569
00:21:06,519 --> 00:21:07,201
(whispers): Stop talking.
570
00:21:07,226 --> 00:21:08,475
At Aloha once...
571
00:21:08,477 --> 00:21:09,943
It's okay, Josh. It's cool.
572
00:21:10,078 --> 00:21:12,569
I don't need to know any
more information. We're cool.
573
00:21:13,561 --> 00:21:15,149
Oh, God.
574
00:21:15,901 --> 00:21:19,369
I feel so much better. (chuckles)
575
00:21:19,371 --> 00:21:20,988
Let's just put this behind us.
576
00:21:20,990 --> 00:21:22,239
Okay?
577
00:21:22,241 --> 00:21:23,540
Are you sure?
578
00:21:23,542 --> 00:21:25,242
Yes.
579
00:21:30,550 --> 00:21:31,678
Okay.
580
00:21:33,004 --> 00:21:34,022
Bye.
581
00:21:35,655 --> 00:21:36,654
Yeah.
582
00:21:36,820 --> 00:21:38,257
What a mess.
583
00:21:39,882 --> 00:21:41,809
Yeah. Good job.
584
00:21:41,811 --> 00:21:43,677
I'm sorry, did you just bro-hug
585
00:21:43,679 --> 00:21:45,929
the guy that's sleeping
with your ex-girlfriend?
586
00:21:46,141 --> 00:21:47,577
Yeah.
587
00:21:47,766 --> 00:21:50,017
Okay, but you're, like,
upset about it, right?
588
00:21:50,019 --> 00:21:51,652
You really liked Rebecca.
589
00:21:51,654 --> 00:21:52,986
You dicked me over for her.
590
00:21:52,988 --> 00:21:54,321
It's, like, kind of important to me
591
00:21:54,323 --> 00:21:56,023
that you be upset about this, Greg.
592
00:21:56,025 --> 00:21:59,159
Listen, what Rebecca and I had
together was an undefined thing,
593
00:21:59,161 --> 00:22:01,411
followed by a nightmare wedding date.
594
00:22:01,639 --> 00:22:03,530
And then I didn't call her for a month.
595
00:22:03,532 --> 00:22:07,251
Dude, you're getting sober...
You're not turning into a robot.
596
00:22:07,514 --> 00:22:09,536
It's okay to have feelings.
597
00:22:09,538 --> 00:22:11,538
It's fine. I'm okay.
598
00:22:11,733 --> 00:22:13,957
I'm, uh... I'm doing amazing.
599
00:22:13,959 --> 00:22:15,759
Mm-hmm. I'm bringing donuts
600
00:22:15,761 --> 00:22:17,427
to my next meeting. I know that
doesn't sound like a big deal,
601
00:22:17,429 --> 00:22:18,712
but it is. Oh, it is.
602
00:22:18,714 --> 00:22:21,014
So, I, um, actually
have to go to work now.
603
00:22:21,016 --> 00:22:21,965
I'm working a double.
604
00:22:21,967 --> 00:22:24,264
Yeah, but... Take care, Heather.
605
00:22:27,773 --> 00:22:29,640
Whooptie freakin' do
606
00:22:29,642 --> 00:22:32,726
My best friend is sleeping
with my ex behind my back
607
00:22:32,728 --> 00:22:34,361
Who cares?
608
00:22:34,363 --> 00:22:36,196
I don't
609
00:22:36,198 --> 00:22:38,874
But I could if I wanted...
610
00:22:48,570 --> 00:22:50,858
Hey. Oh.
611
00:22:51,289 --> 00:22:53,072
- What are you doin'?
- Oh,
612
00:22:53,074 --> 00:22:54,908
I'm just, uh, stretchin' for
my private Ping-Pong lesson
613
00:22:54,910 --> 00:22:56,702
in the conference room
with an 11-year-old child.
614
00:22:56,962 --> 00:22:58,225
Of course.
615
00:22:58,250 --> 00:22:59,806
'Cause that makes perfect sense.
616
00:22:59,831 --> 00:23:01,965
Okay. Hey, listen, I
just came in to remind you
617
00:23:01,967 --> 00:23:03,249
that today is Friday.
618
00:23:03,251 --> 00:23:05,468
Oh, thank God. Friday. TGIF.
619
00:23:05,470 --> 00:23:09,923
Oh! Full House, Family Matters,
Step by Step.
620
00:23:09,925 --> 00:23:11,674
Okay, no, you were supposed to, um,
621
00:23:11,676 --> 00:23:13,764
give me that letter of
recommendation by today.
622
00:23:14,085 --> 00:23:15,712
Oh. Right.
623
00:23:15,714 --> 00:23:18,514
Oh, oh, oh, the letter,
the letter, the letter.
624
00:23:18,761 --> 00:23:21,078
Okay, can I get it to you tonight?
625
00:23:21,103 --> 00:23:23,246
At literally, like, 2:00 a.m.
626
00:23:23,271 --> 00:23:24,835
Can you submit it at 2:00 a.m.?
627
00:23:25,678 --> 00:23:27,607
Yes. Yep.
628
00:23:27,609 --> 00:23:29,442
Yeah, that's no problem at all.
629
00:23:29,444 --> 00:23:30,994
I mean, or, you know, I could...
630
00:23:30,996 --> 00:23:32,225
I could just use
Darryl's letter, I guess.
631
00:23:32,250 --> 00:23:33,827
No. Oh, come on,
632
00:23:33,852 --> 00:23:35,155
don't use Darryl's letter.
633
00:23:35,180 --> 00:23:36,780
I mean, I love the guy, but,
I mean, he can't even spell
634
00:23:36,805 --> 00:23:38,104
the word "separate."
635
00:23:38,129 --> 00:23:40,163
- No, I'll do it, I'll do it.
- Okay.
636
00:23:40,188 --> 00:23:41,604
I don't know, I'm just
kind of getting the feeling
637
00:23:41,629 --> 00:23:44,184
that maybe you don't...
want to write the letter.
638
00:23:44,209 --> 00:23:45,792
Oh, my God, no. You're hurting my heart.
639
00:23:45,794 --> 00:23:46,793
Of course I want to write it.
640
00:23:46,795 --> 00:23:50,129
Ugh! But Xiao just got here
641
00:23:50,131 --> 00:23:51,180
and I don't want to be rude,
642
00:23:51,182 --> 00:23:52,882
because he's an
11-year-old child.
643
00:23:52,884 --> 00:23:54,717
But, Paula, I will write it, okay?
644
00:23:54,719 --> 00:23:57,991
I promise. I always keep my promises.
645
00:23:58,369 --> 00:24:00,202
(English accent): A Lannister
always pays her debts.
646
00:24:00,850 --> 00:24:03,693
I just started on season
one. So no spoilers. (grunts)
647
00:24:03,695 --> 00:24:04,894
Okay.
648
00:24:07,649 --> 00:24:09,148
Darryl, what were you doing?
649
00:24:09,319 --> 00:24:11,618
Ned Stark dies, by the way.
650
00:24:11,620 --> 00:24:12,902
No, but he's the show.
651
00:24:12,904 --> 00:24:14,454
Don't get too used to Robb either.
652
00:24:14,456 --> 00:24:15,955
(gasps) No.
653
00:24:15,957 --> 00:24:19,042
(groans)
654
00:24:19,749 --> 00:24:21,077
You know what,
655
00:24:21,079 --> 00:24:22,850
you're getting a lot better at this.
656
00:24:22,875 --> 00:24:24,485
And do I... do I look hot?
657
00:24:24,510 --> 00:24:25,967
Uh, yeah?
658
00:24:27,002 --> 00:24:28,885
Thank you, young man.
659
00:24:28,887 --> 00:24:30,837
Oh, this is so great.
660
00:24:30,839 --> 00:24:32,422
'Cause when Josh sees
that I'm good at Ping-Pong,
661
00:24:32,424 --> 00:24:34,891
he's gonna know that
I'm 'ol and independent
662
00:24:34,893 --> 00:24:36,809
and he's gonna be really impressed.
663
00:24:36,811 --> 00:24:39,479
And I know exactly what
he's gonna say to himself.
664
00:24:39,481 --> 00:24:41,981
(rock intro plays)
665
00:24:41,983 --> 00:24:45,151
Whoa, yeah
666
00:24:45,153 --> 00:24:47,487
Okay
667
00:24:47,489 --> 00:24:49,072
Hey!
668
00:24:49,074 --> 00:24:50,406
Whoa
669
00:24:50,408 --> 00:24:54,027
Bros, beer, sports!
670
00:24:54,029 --> 00:24:57,914
When she walked into
the Ping-Pong hall
671
00:24:57,916 --> 00:25:00,783
Casually tossing
a Ping-Pong ball
672
00:25:00,785 --> 00:25:03,870
I could tell she's
the most perfect girl
673
00:25:03,872 --> 00:25:05,538
Who's ever existed
674
00:25:05,540 --> 00:25:07,457
Dude!
675
00:25:07,459 --> 00:25:09,876
Oh, man, look at
her pong that ping
676
00:25:09,878 --> 00:25:13,513
When she plays, she doesn't
care if anyone's watching
677
00:25:13,515 --> 00:25:17,717
She does it for herself and
that puts my fears to rest
678
00:25:17,719 --> 00:25:19,969
Bro!
679
00:25:19,971 --> 00:25:21,721
After each rally
680
00:25:21,723 --> 00:25:25,558
She chugs beer instead of water
681
00:25:25,560 --> 00:25:27,944
She's so aloof,
it borders on cold
682
00:25:27,946 --> 00:25:32,398
And that's what
makes me want her
683
00:25:32,400 --> 00:25:33,566
Ping-Pong girl
684
00:25:33,568 --> 00:25:36,152
She's so independent
685
00:25:36,154 --> 00:25:38,988
This fantasy beats
out flight attendant
686
00:25:38,990 --> 00:25:40,907
She's playing Ping-Pong
on her own terms
687
00:25:40,909 --> 00:25:42,825
So I'm the pursuer
688
00:25:42,827 --> 00:25:44,160
Pursuer
689
00:25:44,162 --> 00:25:46,079
Ping-Pong girl
690
00:25:46,081 --> 00:25:48,247
Her forehand is a jet stream
691
00:25:48,249 --> 00:25:51,918
And her backhand's
right out of a sex dream
692
00:25:51,920 --> 00:25:55,755
And that's the best messy bun
I've ever seen in the world
693
00:25:55,757 --> 00:25:57,890
My P-P-Ping-Pong
girl
694
00:25:57,892 --> 00:26:01,177
Girl, girl
695
00:26:01,179 --> 00:26:03,730
Dudes sing these kinds of songs!
696
00:26:03,732 --> 00:26:06,599
Whoa, bro
697
00:26:06,601 --> 00:26:09,268
Sega, jock itch!
698
00:26:09,270 --> 00:26:11,020
When she serves the ball
699
00:26:11,022 --> 00:26:12,605
Look how she throws it
700
00:26:12,607 --> 00:26:16,692
She's so hot but
she doesn't know it
701
00:26:16,694 --> 00:26:20,113
She probably just found
that outfit laying around
702
00:26:20,115 --> 00:26:22,448
Like in the trash!
703
00:26:22,450 --> 00:26:25,118
Look at her skill on the
Ping-Pong... uh, court?
704
00:26:25,120 --> 00:26:28,337
Nothing's hotter than a
chick who's good at sports
705
00:26:28,339 --> 00:26:30,623
Whoa! She scored 1,000 points
706
00:26:30,625 --> 00:26:31,674
I think I love her
707
00:26:31,676 --> 00:26:34,377
That's a lot of points!
708
00:26:34,379 --> 00:26:39,966
Ping-Pong shows that she
has control over her body
709
00:26:39,968 --> 00:26:43,386
But it doesn't
threaten my masculinity
710
00:26:43,388 --> 00:26:46,439
Like basketball or hockey
711
00:26:46,441 --> 00:26:48,641
Ping-Pong girl
712
00:26:48,643 --> 00:26:51,310
She's like Serena or Venus
713
00:26:51,312 --> 00:26:54,147
Just watching her
swing affects my penis
714
00:26:54,149 --> 00:26:57,867
You know, us dudes, we love
to talk about our penises
715
00:26:57,869 --> 00:26:58,985
Our penises
716
00:26:58,987 --> 00:27:01,154
Ping-Pong girl
717
00:27:01,156 --> 00:27:02,905
She's so indifferent
718
00:27:02,907 --> 00:27:05,908
It makes me want a
tangible commitment
719
00:27:05,910 --> 00:27:10,079
She and I should give a
30-year mortgage a whirl
720
00:27:10,081 --> 00:27:13,132
My P-P-Ping-Pong
girl
721
00:27:13,134 --> 00:27:16,169
Girl, girl
722
00:27:16,171 --> 00:27:17,336
Girl
723
00:27:17,338 --> 00:27:18,838
Marriage!
724
00:27:18,840 --> 00:27:21,507
Girl, girl
725
00:27:21,509 --> 00:27:24,744
Let's share a Costco card!
726
00:27:24,769 --> 00:27:26,954
Girl, gir...
727
00:27:27,098 --> 00:27:28,648
(indistinct chatter)
728
00:27:28,650 --> 00:27:29,816
Up, one,
729
00:27:29,818 --> 00:27:30,683
two, three.
730
00:27:30,685 --> 00:27:33,486
One, two, three. One, two, three.
731
00:27:33,488 --> 00:27:35,071
One, two, three.
732
00:27:35,073 --> 00:27:36,239
(Ping-Pong ball clacking)
733
00:27:36,241 --> 00:27:39,075
Why are all my friends
in love with this girl?
734
00:27:46,713 --> 00:27:48,282
SCOTT: So she's still working
735
00:27:48,307 --> 00:27:49,494
on the recommendation?
736
00:27:49,519 --> 00:27:51,386
Uh, yeah. But I'm... It's okay.
737
00:27:51,411 --> 00:27:52,743
She's gonna get it to me tonight.
738
00:27:52,767 --> 00:27:54,601
I mean, she's got a
lot of work to do, okay?
739
00:27:54,603 --> 00:27:55,852
She's got a lot going on in her life.
740
00:27:55,854 --> 00:27:57,237
She's busy. I mean,
741
00:27:57,239 --> 00:27:59,079
I shouldn't have asked
her for such a big favor.
742
00:27:59,274 --> 00:28:01,774
What? I don't think
it's such a big favor.
743
00:28:01,776 --> 00:28:03,443
I mean, after everything
you've done for her...
744
00:28:03,445 --> 00:28:05,945
- That she didn't ask for.
- She did ask you
745
00:28:05,947 --> 00:28:07,820
to throw a rock
through a window and...
746
00:28:07,845 --> 00:28:08,615
Okay, okay.
747
00:28:08,617 --> 00:28:11,034
Look, she's-she's
young, she's confused...
748
00:28:11,036 --> 00:28:13,620
Wow, you are really
making excuses for her.
749
00:28:13,622 --> 00:28:16,005
- More than you would for our kids.
- That's 'cause she's better
750
00:28:16,007 --> 00:28:17,697
than our kids, Scott, okay?
751
00:28:17,722 --> 00:28:19,767
She didn't pull a knife
on Aunt June, for starters.
752
00:28:19,792 --> 00:28:22,415
Paula, she owes you.
753
00:28:22,464 --> 00:28:23,463
Oh.
754
00:28:23,465 --> 00:28:24,797
Oh. No, no, no, no.
755
00:28:24,799 --> 00:28:26,466
Uh-uh. She does not owe me, okay?
756
00:28:26,468 --> 00:28:28,650
She is my friend, and she is busy.
757
00:28:28,937 --> 00:28:30,770
And, you know, I don't know,
758
00:28:30,772 --> 00:28:33,473
maybe she thinks this whole
law school thing is dumb, okay?
759
00:28:33,475 --> 00:28:35,058
Maybe it is. I'm old.
760
00:28:35,060 --> 00:28:36,559
Maybe-maybe it's too late.
761
00:28:36,561 --> 00:28:38,369
Maybe-maybe this whole thing is dumb.
762
00:28:38,394 --> 00:28:39,593
It's not dumb!
763
00:28:40,447 --> 00:28:42,587
Your dreams are not dumb.
764
00:28:43,151 --> 00:28:44,962
And I know Rebecca doesn't think that.
765
00:28:44,987 --> 00:28:46,861
She's a very smart girl.
766
00:28:46,886 --> 00:28:49,603
Ha. Suck my paddle, losers!
All right, let Mama have some.
767
00:28:49,650 --> 00:28:51,066
Okay, no, no, Daddy's
gonna take that one.
768
00:28:51,068 --> 00:28:53,485
Okay. All right, all right.
Goldilocks wants some porridge.
769
00:28:53,487 --> 00:28:56,788
Okay. Oh... O-Okay, you got it.
770
00:28:56,790 --> 00:28:58,790
- All right. Okay. Yep.
- (Ping-Pong ball clacking)
771
00:28:58,792 --> 00:29:00,923
I thought you said she was a champion.
772
00:29:01,580 --> 00:29:03,046
She did say she was rusty.
773
00:29:03,048 --> 00:29:04,464
Okay, Attaboy! Attaboy, Xiao!
774
00:29:04,466 --> 00:29:06,166
Yeah, yeah. I'm with him, I'm with him!
775
00:29:06,168 --> 00:29:08,117
- Dude, where's Greg?
- Yeah.
776
00:29:08,142 --> 00:29:10,336
- He should be here by now.
- He's probably on his way.
777
00:29:10,338 --> 00:29:11,471
I'll get him a beer.
778
00:29:11,994 --> 00:29:13,572
- Dude.
- What?
779
00:29:13,925 --> 00:29:15,008
I don't know the rules.
780
00:29:15,010 --> 00:29:16,486
There's one rule.
781
00:29:16,665 --> 00:29:18,428
JOSH: You guys told Greg to come here?
782
00:29:18,430 --> 00:29:19,729
Tonight?
783
00:29:20,262 --> 00:29:21,461
Why would you do that?
784
00:29:21,486 --> 00:29:23,403
Why do you care?
785
00:29:23,556 --> 00:29:26,515
Oh, my God. You told him?
786
00:29:26,540 --> 00:29:27,770
You told me to tell him.
787
00:29:27,772 --> 00:29:28,655
Tell him what?
788
00:29:28,657 --> 00:29:30,156
Josh and Rebecca are having sex
789
00:29:30,158 --> 00:29:32,692
- and basically living together.
- What?!
790
00:29:33,025 --> 00:29:34,525
We're not living together.
791
00:29:34,527 --> 00:29:36,410
I'm just crashing at her apartment.
792
00:29:36,412 --> 00:29:37,528
Okay, you tell yourself that.
793
00:29:37,530 --> 00:29:38,946
Okay. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Hold up.
794
00:29:38,948 --> 00:29:41,165
So Greg knows that you
and Rebecca are together.
795
00:29:41,523 --> 00:29:42,822
Oh, no.
796
00:29:42,847 --> 00:29:44,835
Greg is probably freaking
out. Is that why he's not here?
797
00:29:45,048 --> 00:29:46,920
He said he was gonna come
here right after his meeting.
798
00:29:46,922 --> 00:29:47,955
He should be here.
799
00:29:47,957 --> 00:29:49,056
Yeah, where is he?
800
00:29:53,509 --> 00:29:55,846
Your boy never showed with the donuts.
801
00:29:55,848 --> 00:29:57,462
Shut up, Hubcap.
802
00:29:57,716 --> 00:29:59,716
You never put the new guy on donuts.
803
00:29:59,718 --> 00:30:01,351
Yeah, I know.
804
00:30:01,353 --> 00:30:03,064
I thought he could handle it.
805
00:30:05,224 --> 00:30:07,524
Quick question. Let me
just clear something up.
806
00:30:07,526 --> 00:30:10,736
You told Hector about you
and Rebecca and not me?
807
00:30:11,564 --> 00:30:12,673
Why?
808
00:30:13,232 --> 00:30:14,853
Uh, you're a little judgy.
809
00:30:15,095 --> 00:30:16,261
You're a lot judgy.
810
00:30:16,286 --> 00:30:17,702
You're like Judge Reinhold.
811
00:30:17,736 --> 00:30:18,603
Not a judge.
812
00:30:18,628 --> 00:30:19,877
Guys, I'm really starting to worry.
813
00:30:19,944 --> 00:30:21,110
He said he'd be here.
814
00:30:21,142 --> 00:30:22,712
Drunk or not, Greg is prompt.
815
00:30:22,875 --> 00:30:24,708
So, what do you guys
think? I'm a little rusty
816
00:30:24,733 --> 00:30:27,054
from my Eastern Northern
Seaboard County District days,
817
00:30:27,079 --> 00:30:28,579
but, you know, it's coming back to me.
818
00:30:28,581 --> 00:30:29,963
It's like riding a
bicycle. What's wrong?
819
00:30:30,197 --> 00:30:32,549
Greg is supposed to be here. He's late.
820
00:30:32,691 --> 00:30:36,212
And the guys are worried he's
drinking again, because...
821
00:30:36,736 --> 00:30:38,922
well, he's an alcoholic.
822
00:30:38,924 --> 00:30:40,807
I know. I'm not supposed to tell people,
823
00:30:40,809 --> 00:30:42,158
but this is an emergency.
824
00:30:43,509 --> 00:30:46,548
Uh, okay. What makes you
think he's drinking again?
825
00:30:47,445 --> 00:30:50,496
Because I told him the
truth about you and me.
826
00:30:50,975 --> 00:30:52,642
You did what?
827
00:31:01,791 --> 00:31:04,845
Josh, you-you told Greg about us?
828
00:31:05,158 --> 00:31:07,805
Remember, you and I decided
it was wrong to have sex,
829
00:31:07,830 --> 00:31:11,298
- because Greg didn't know about us.
- Uh-huh.
830
00:31:11,323 --> 00:31:13,510
So when I found out
about the alcoholic thing,
831
00:31:13,535 --> 00:31:16,224
I decided I was definitely
not gonna tell Greg.
832
00:31:16,249 --> 00:31:17,025
Yeah.
833
00:31:17,050 --> 00:31:18,447
And then I told Greg.
834
00:31:18,472 --> 00:31:19,572
Oh.
835
00:31:20,495 --> 00:31:21,844
Okay, um...
836
00:31:22,837 --> 00:31:23,961
How did he take it?
837
00:31:23,963 --> 00:31:25,262
Guess not great,
838
00:31:25,264 --> 00:31:26,283
'cause he's disappeared.
839
00:31:26,308 --> 00:31:28,726
Yeah. Good job, you horny monsters.
840
00:31:29,119 --> 00:31:30,217
Oh, I'm sorry.
841
00:31:30,219 --> 00:31:31,275
That sound judgy?
842
00:31:31,595 --> 00:31:32,579
Good.
843
00:31:32,604 --> 00:31:34,876
- Just, not now, Chiphunk.
- Chiphunk?
844
00:31:34,914 --> 00:31:37,197
She thinks you look like
a giant buff chipmunk.
845
00:31:37,837 --> 00:31:38,953
I'll take it.
846
00:31:38,978 --> 00:31:41,144
Okay, maybe we're
overreacting. Maybe Greg's fine.
847
00:31:41,146 --> 00:31:42,529
Yes. Yeah, yeah.
848
00:31:42,531 --> 00:31:44,147
- He said he was fine, like, ten times.
- WHITE JOSH: Guys, guys.
849
00:31:44,149 --> 00:31:45,565
You know that when Greg says he's fine,
850
00:31:45,567 --> 00:31:46,867
that's when he's not fine.
851
00:31:46,869 --> 00:31:48,869
- You know that.
- HECTOR: Maybe they're right.
852
00:31:48,871 --> 00:31:50,287
Maybe Greg is fine.
853
00:31:50,289 --> 00:31:51,822
He'll just have a few and sleep it off.
854
00:31:52,324 --> 00:31:53,556
One rule!
855
00:31:53,771 --> 00:31:56,071
Oh! That's the rule!
856
00:31:56,378 --> 00:31:59,814
Okay. Yeah. We should
definitely find him right now.
857
00:31:59,853 --> 00:32:01,436
Home Base is closed.
858
00:32:01,438 --> 00:32:04,117
So if he's out there getting messed up
and drinking again, he won't be there.
859
00:32:04,142 --> 00:32:06,033
I could try the beer
garden on East Cameron.
860
00:32:06,204 --> 00:32:07,603
I'll try the gastropub on East Cameron.
861
00:32:07,628 --> 00:32:09,704
- Should we carpool?
- Smart.
862
00:32:09,889 --> 00:32:11,389
Okay, okay. And where should I go?
863
00:32:11,414 --> 00:32:12,746
- A-a-and where should I go?
- WHITE JOSH: No!
864
00:32:12,771 --> 00:32:14,271
Not you two.
865
00:32:14,471 --> 00:32:15,970
You stay away.
866
00:32:16,114 --> 00:32:17,533
(sighs)
867
00:32:18,174 --> 00:32:20,820
Well, I can stay here
in case he shows up.
868
00:32:20,845 --> 00:32:22,742
- That's smart.
- Thanks.
869
00:32:22,767 --> 00:32:24,045
I was a Boy Scout for years.
870
00:32:24,650 --> 00:32:26,721
I've got to go find
him. I-I can't stay here.
871
00:32:26,746 --> 00:32:28,446
Well, how are you gonna do that?
872
00:32:30,259 --> 00:32:33,133
Paula, thank you so much
for helping me find Greg.
873
00:32:33,158 --> 00:32:35,208
PAULA: And... voil?!
874
00:32:35,210 --> 00:32:36,660
Wow!
875
00:32:37,349 --> 00:32:39,072
Intuition.
876
00:32:58,394 --> 00:33:00,004
What are you doing here?
877
00:33:01,333 --> 00:33:02,988
Everyone's looking for you.
878
00:33:05,051 --> 00:33:07,107
Not me. I wasn't looking for you.
879
00:33:07,109 --> 00:33:08,410
I just like ducks.
880
00:33:12,863 --> 00:33:16,793
Look, I know you know
about... me and Josh.
881
00:33:18,465 --> 00:33:21,598
I'm sorry you found out the way you did.
882
00:33:21,623 --> 00:33:22,793
Um...
883
00:33:23,425 --> 00:33:25,457
I wanted to tell you myself,
884
00:33:26,357 --> 00:33:29,152
but I didn't know where you were.
885
00:33:30,099 --> 00:33:32,182
I got a single text from you
886
00:33:32,184 --> 00:33:35,027
and then you disappeared for a month.
887
00:33:36,850 --> 00:33:38,207
Yeah.
888
00:33:39,277 --> 00:33:41,108
I was embarrassed.
889
00:33:41,558 --> 00:33:43,137
I'm sure you heard.
890
00:33:44,279 --> 00:33:46,646
DUI, alcoholic, blah, blah, blah.
891
00:33:46,648 --> 00:33:50,418
I heard. Yeah.
I'm... I'm sorry.
892
00:33:52,067 --> 00:33:54,121
I really have been doing a lot better.
893
00:33:56,992 --> 00:33:59,113
But then I heard about you and Chan.
894
00:33:59,628 --> 00:34:02,948
And... you had a drink?
895
00:34:02,973 --> 00:34:05,132
No, no. I didn't. I wanted to.
896
00:34:05,134 --> 00:34:07,019
I thought about it. I almost did.
897
00:34:07,219 --> 00:34:09,027
I picked out a drink,
898
00:34:09,304 --> 00:34:11,902
and a glass, and ice.
899
00:34:12,391 --> 00:34:15,848
And instead, I hit a wall.
900
00:34:16,929 --> 00:34:18,762
Literally. (gasps)
901
00:34:18,764 --> 00:34:20,424
- Punched the hell out of a wall.
- Oh, my God.
902
00:34:20,449 --> 00:34:21,410
- Oh, ouch.
- Yeah.
903
00:34:21,435 --> 00:34:22,600
No, no. I'm okay.
904
00:34:22,625 --> 00:34:23,809
It's actually good.
905
00:34:24,153 --> 00:34:28,438
At least I didn't use
alcohol to block an emotion.
906
00:34:31,554 --> 00:34:32,629
Look.
907
00:34:33,785 --> 00:34:36,580
At... the night of the wedding,
908
00:34:36,582 --> 00:34:39,449
you... completely broke my heart,
909
00:34:39,451 --> 00:34:43,253
but that's no excuse
for me to be sleeping
910
00:34:43,255 --> 00:34:46,035
with your best friend, and I'm so sorry.
911
00:34:46,292 --> 00:34:48,230
I don't need an apology from you.
912
00:34:48,710 --> 00:34:52,546
Rebecca, when I first met you, I said,
913
00:34:52,548 --> 00:34:56,349
"You're ignoring me, so
you're obviously my type."
914
00:34:56,351 --> 00:34:58,480
I picked you because you
weren't interested in me.
915
00:34:58,887 --> 00:35:00,832
(laughs)
916
00:35:01,390 --> 00:35:03,557
That's funny, because by
the end of the wedding,
917
00:35:03,559 --> 00:35:05,225
you weren't interested in me.
918
00:35:05,227 --> 00:35:06,443
The funny thing is,
919
00:35:06,445 --> 00:35:08,394
and not "ha-ha" funny, sad funny,
920
00:35:10,399 --> 00:35:15,202
the reason I got a DUI... was
because I was driving over
921
00:35:15,204 --> 00:35:18,121
the next morning to tell
you that I loved you.
922
00:35:19,144 --> 00:35:21,824
But... I blew my shot.
923
00:35:22,887 --> 00:35:24,285
And that's my fault.
924
00:35:25,380 --> 00:35:27,309
Life went on without me, and...
925
00:35:28,300 --> 00:35:29,801
You and Josh...
926
00:35:31,670 --> 00:35:33,465
You should be happy together.
927
00:35:34,423 --> 00:35:35,922
You're happy, right?
928
00:35:36,543 --> 00:35:38,121
And he treats you well?
929
00:35:38,291 --> 00:35:39,668
Um...
930
00:35:40,596 --> 00:35:41,934
Yes.
931
00:35:44,266 --> 00:35:46,098
Then everything worked out fine.
932
00:35:49,104 --> 00:35:50,816
Wow. You're like...
933
00:35:52,059 --> 00:35:54,762
you're like this new enlightened person.
934
00:35:55,244 --> 00:35:56,926
Not really; not yet.
935
00:35:57,356 --> 00:35:59,690
Someday, I hope. (chuckles)
936
00:36:01,950 --> 00:36:03,333
Hey! Rebecca.
937
00:36:03,335 --> 00:36:05,418
Sorry. I need a ride back to Torrance.
938
00:36:05,420 --> 00:36:07,402
Yeah. Hold on a second.
939
00:36:07,857 --> 00:36:10,074
- Greg, this is Xiao.
- Hi.
940
00:36:10,099 --> 00:36:12,069
We are wearing matching outfits...
941
00:36:12,094 --> 00:36:13,593
Oh, no, no. I don't...
942
00:36:13,595 --> 00:36:14,878
I-I don't need to know. It's fine.
943
00:36:15,598 --> 00:36:16,824
- Hi.
- Hi.
944
00:36:25,434 --> 00:36:27,215
Here's the letter you asked for.
945
00:36:27,415 --> 00:36:29,748
I should have written it
the second you asked for it,
946
00:36:29,773 --> 00:36:31,051
so please forgive me
947
00:36:31,076 --> 00:36:33,026
and my garbage self.
948
00:36:33,535 --> 00:36:36,129
Oh, Rebecca.
949
00:36:37,146 --> 00:36:40,447
You know that I thought for
a second, maybe you thought,
950
00:36:40,449 --> 00:36:42,426
that me going to law
school was ridiculous.
951
00:36:43,001 --> 00:36:44,121
What?
952
00:36:44,630 --> 00:36:47,704
No. No, no... Oh, no.
953
00:36:47,706 --> 00:36:50,410
I'm so sorry that you-you
thought that for even a second.
954
00:36:50,743 --> 00:36:53,129
Paula, you are so brave.
955
00:36:54,830 --> 00:36:57,355
I had a conversation
with someone recently...
956
00:36:58,088 --> 00:36:59,535
It was Greg, it was last night,
957
00:36:59,560 --> 00:37:00,863
it was at a duck pond...
958
00:37:01,666 --> 00:37:06,049
And it made me realize that
changing your life... is hard
959
00:37:06,671 --> 00:37:08,869
and you deserve support.
960
00:37:09,143 --> 00:37:11,393
I-I want to be there for you.
961
00:37:15,057 --> 00:37:16,783
Don't read it in front of
me. I'll get embarrassed.
962
00:37:16,808 --> 00:37:19,475
Oh, my God. This is so sweet.
963
00:37:19,850 --> 00:37:20,963
Oh!
964
00:37:21,549 --> 00:37:22,902
Oh, the part...
965
00:37:22,904 --> 00:37:24,270
It's true. It's all true.
966
00:37:24,272 --> 00:37:26,522
You're the greatest
person I've ever met.
967
00:37:27,707 --> 00:37:29,751
Cookie. Oh!
968
00:37:29,776 --> 00:37:32,171
This is a... beautiful letter,
969
00:37:32,196 --> 00:37:33,611
and I will,
970
00:37:33,864 --> 00:37:35,864
I will treasure it forever.
971
00:37:37,189 --> 00:37:39,084
But I had to turn in Darryl's letter
972
00:37:39,086 --> 00:37:41,203
- because he gave it to me on time.
- Oh, my God.
973
00:37:41,205 --> 00:37:43,111
- I'm so sorry.
- You know what? Don't be.
974
00:37:43,136 --> 00:37:46,804
His letter was... not terrible.
975
00:37:47,011 --> 00:37:49,049
Best friends for life.
976
00:37:49,074 --> 00:37:51,025
(clattering)
977
00:37:58,174 --> 00:38:00,105
What the hell are these?
978
00:38:00,107 --> 00:38:02,942
These are the most
expensive donuts in the city.
979
00:38:02,944 --> 00:38:05,477
Gourmet donuts from the
new place on East Cameron.
980
00:38:05,479 --> 00:38:07,563
(sighs) We like our usual place.
981
00:38:08,033 --> 00:38:10,449
And you got one dinosaur-shaped donut?
982
00:38:10,588 --> 00:38:12,534
What are we supposed to do
with that, fight over it?
983
00:38:12,536 --> 00:38:14,236
I was trying to make it up to you.
984
00:38:14,238 --> 00:38:16,905
Next time, just get what
you're supposed to get.
985
00:38:16,907 --> 00:38:19,525
Better yet, just show up.
986
00:38:20,369 --> 00:38:21,877
I think I can do that.
987
00:38:21,978 --> 00:38:23,392
I hope I can.
988
00:38:23,417 --> 00:38:27,335
Now, let's split this adorable
dinosaur before people see it.
989
00:38:27,845 --> 00:38:29,802
Oh, you get the butt.
990
00:38:29,804 --> 00:38:31,086
Yeah.
991
00:38:31,416 --> 00:38:33,955
(lasers shooting in game)
992
00:38:33,980 --> 00:38:35,563
So he wasn't getting drunk.
993
00:38:35,869 --> 00:38:39,799
He was just sitting there on
a bench with a box of donuts?
994
00:38:39,824 --> 00:38:41,283
Yeah. He was fine.
995
00:38:42,767 --> 00:38:44,767
He was great, actually.
996
00:38:44,769 --> 00:38:47,814
He's like... he's learning
to process things differently.
997
00:38:49,416 --> 00:38:51,291
He actually seemed like
he was in a great place.
998
00:38:51,609 --> 00:38:52,877
Oh, whew.
999
00:38:52,902 --> 00:38:55,269
Man, I am so relieved.
1000
00:38:55,294 --> 00:38:56,619
That is so good.
1001
00:38:56,644 --> 00:38:58,060
So, uh, hey.
1002
00:38:58,085 --> 00:39:00,176
It-it all kind of worked out.
1003
00:39:00,201 --> 00:39:01,367
Totally.
1004
00:39:01,369 --> 00:39:02,451
Hey, you said you love video games.
1005
00:39:02,453 --> 00:39:03,502
Do you want to get in here?
1006
00:39:03,642 --> 00:39:05,587
Um, I'm not feeling
1007
00:39:05,589 --> 00:39:06,986
the video games right now.
1008
00:39:08,158 --> 00:39:09,508
Actually, I lied to you.
1009
00:39:09,510 --> 00:39:11,293
I don't, I don't like video games.
1010
00:39:11,295 --> 00:39:13,679
Just like you lied about Ping-Pong?
1011
00:39:13,681 --> 00:39:16,424
(laughing): What was that about?
1012
00:39:18,174 --> 00:39:20,900
I was trying to spend
time with you, Josh.
1013
00:39:21,328 --> 00:39:23,525
That's what the whole stupid
Ping-Pong thing was about.
1014
00:39:23,974 --> 00:39:25,941
(sighs)
1015
00:39:25,943 --> 00:39:27,924
You know what, Josh? You live here.
1016
00:39:28,101 --> 00:39:30,447
You do, and you can
tell yourself whatever,
1017
00:39:30,472 --> 00:39:33,978
but... I deserve to be with
someone who treats me well.
1018
00:39:35,111 --> 00:39:36,205
Okay.
1019
00:39:37,916 --> 00:39:39,488
Wow.
1020
00:39:40,324 --> 00:39:41,845
Yeah. Whew. Wow.
1021
00:39:41,870 --> 00:39:42,908
Okay, yeah.
1022
00:39:42,933 --> 00:39:43,861
Yeah.
1023
00:39:44,995 --> 00:39:46,995
(sighs)
1024
00:40:03,224 --> 00:40:05,474
1025
00:40:32,676 --> 00:40:33,926
Oh. Hi, ma'am.
1026
00:40:33,928 --> 00:40:35,260
Ma'am, excuse me. You're on the ball.
1027
00:40:35,262 --> 00:40:37,513
Just... no, it's right...
Okay, so just move your foot
1028
00:40:37,515 --> 00:40:40,048
(laughing): this way... this
shouldn't be this hard; this is funny.
1029
00:40:40,050 --> 00:40:42,634
Okay, no. Your skirt
is just so voluminous.
1030
00:40:42,636 --> 00:40:44,553
It's like you're in the 18th century.
1031
00:40:44,555 --> 00:40:45,721
I don't even know
where the ball is any...
1032
00:40:45,723 --> 00:40:47,890
Oh! Okay. You kicked it.
1033
00:40:47,892 --> 00:40:49,057
Also, you're not wearing any underwear.
1034
00:40:49,059 --> 00:40:50,275
Have a great day. Okay.
1035
00:40:50,277 --> 00:40:52,277
Oh.
1036
00:40:52,600 --> 00:40:54,300
Hi. Sir, sir.
1037
00:40:54,325 --> 00:40:56,908
So... Oh! There's her underwear.
1038
00:40:57,056 --> 00:41:02,002
-- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe --
-- www.addic7ed.com --
1039
00:41:02,052 --> 00:41:06,602
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