All language subtitles for Adam Ruins Everything s02e14 Halloween.eg

(THUNDER CRASHING)

(WOLF HOWLING)

(VOICE) Beware, it's Halloween.

A night of frights to make you scream.

Huzzah! Orson Welles has returned

from a night of trick-or-treating

and causing mass panic about the town.

(VOICE) Better watch out...

- Better watch out...
- Hello?

Better watch out... Better watch out...

Mom?

Dad?

Where is everybody?

?

Hello?

Someone needs to check
my Halloween candy.

A stranger could've poisoned it,
and I could totally die.

?

What was that?

Grandpa?

Are you haunting me?

Are the dead coming back to life?

(PHONE RINGING)

(PHONE RINGING)

(PHONE RINGING)

Hello?

Everything you're scared of
on Halloween is wrong...

(CLICK, DIAL TONE)

(DISTANT THUD)

And I'm going to tell you about it.

(SCREAMING) An axe murderer!

What? No, I'm a TV host.

Even worse.

Hi, I'm Adam Conover,

and this is the "Adam Ruins Everything"

Halloween Special!

- (CACKLING)
- (THUNDER CRASHES)

(SCREAMING)

(THUNDER CRASHES)

?

Nice try, Stuart, but that blood puddle

is not consistent with
a stab wound in the back.

Oh, come on.

Halloween's not
supposed to be accurate,

it's supposed to be scary.

I got one goal tonight,

and that's to be scared spitless.

So, if you're not gonna help,

at least be an adult
and check my candy.

It was probably poisoned
by an evil stranger.

Hah! I would, but the idea that

strangers are tampering with your candy

is a straight-up urban myth.

I'll show you!

I said scare me, not teach me!

Americans seem to think
there's an epidemic

of crazy kooks contaminating candy.

Halloween is my Christmas!

For randomly poisoning
children, that is!

(ADAM) As a result,
parents treat Halloween

like a major security event.

(BEEPING)

Hold the line!

- (RINGING)
- We have an unwrapped treat here.

And it's no wonder,

because the media repeats
this terrifying tale

over and over again.

(REPORTER) Disturbing
warning for all parents,

please check your children's
Halloween candy.

(SECOND REPORTER) If the candy
feels, smells, or looks weird,

or has been opened, toss it.

(THIRD REPORTER) Parents can check
the candy from the outside,

of course, and it can also be
checked from the inside.

So just take your candy in
for free and have it x-rayed.

See? Strangers are out to kill me,

and since I've survived
the assassination attempts

my entire life,

that must mean I am immortal.

Nope! Aww.

This spooky story just isn't true.

There has never been
a single documented report found

of a stranger seriously harming a child

by poisoning their Halloween candy.

Sounds like something
a stranger would say.

- Well, I say it too.
- (SCREAMS)

Ooh, now that was scary.

This is Joel Best.

He's a professor
at the University of Delaware

who's been studying
reports of strangers

tampering with candy for over 30 years.

Oh. Less scary.

The tampered candy story has
no basis in fact.

Two separate reports looked
into claims of tampered candy

and concluded that virtually
all of them were hoaxes.

And, if a child were killed this way,

it would be a major news story.

Yet I've never found any evidence

of such a story being
covered by major media.

The fact is, there is no evidence

that any child has ever been
killed or seriously hurt

by tampered candy
received from a stranger

during trick-or-treating.

But... why would everyone
be scared for nothing?

Well, this story plays
into fears we already have.

Warnings about Halloween candy

tend to be most acute during years

when there's been a terrible crime

or a shift in culture

that heightens everyone's fears.

For instance, the Tylenol
poisonings of 1982 caused

fears of contaminated candy
to spike, and after 9/11,

people suddenly became nervous

about trick-or-treating

in large buildings like local malls.

Malls?

What a boring place to be afraid of.

The poisoned candy story is
a modern day fairy tale.

In olden times, when people
were afraid of the forest,

spooky stories were set
in the deep, dark woods.

Today, our greatest fear
seems to be of strangers,

and since kids interact
with strangers on Halloween,

that's what
our urban legends are about.

Thanks, Joel.

Wait, don't put the lid on,

then my candle will go out!

Right! Stranger danger.

Even if strangers aren't
poisoning our candy,

they still have unmarked vans.

Actually, our fear of
strangers is way overblown.

Ugh!

Only 1% of missing children
in 2016 were abducted

by a non-family-member,

and the vast majority
of offenders charged

with crimes against children
targeted a child they knew.

In fact, the only documented report

of a kid actually dying from
poisoned Halloween candy...

- (DOORBELL RINGING)
- Trick or treat.

...was when it was given to him by...

Here you are... son.

- (THUNDER CRASHES)
- ...his own father.

- Whoa.
- The fact is,

there are threats
to kids' safety out there

that we need to be mindful of.

But our cultural fear of strangers is

totally out of sync
with the real risks.

You don't need to be afraid
of your Halloween candy.

It's actually quite safe.

I don't want safe!

The only reason
I liked trick-or-treating

was because it was scary.

Halloween is supposed to be terrifying.

Like when my hero, Orson Welles,

terrorized the nation with his infamous

"War of the Worlds" broadcast.

People were running in the streets,

afraid for their lives!

It was mass chaos!

(CACKLING)

Oh, none of those things
actually happened.

Let me tell you about it.

Jeez Louise, you are the only person

who uses mag be more boring.

(STATIC, INDISTINCT VOICES)

Back to Orson Welles
and the Mercury Theater

in "War of the Worlds."

Yes, my favorite!

When Orson Welles first broadcast

"The War of the Worlds"

on the night before Halloween, 1938.

It told a terrifying story
of a Martian invasion.

We know now that in the early
years of the 20th century,

this world was being watched closely

by intelligences greater than man's.

(EERIE NOTE)

The poisoned Martian smoke has
reached Times Square!

People are trying to run away
from it, but it's no use!

They're falling like flies.

(BOY) And the best part
is, everyone bought it.

I'm confusing fantasy and reality.

Martians are real, and I'm terrified.

I'd better run out
into the street and riot!

The entire country
descended into chaos,

terrified by Orson Welles, my hero.

(ADAM) Yes, that's the
story we've been told,

but the spine-tingling truth
is it never happened.

What? Adam, get out of my radio.

Tonight, A.R.E. Radio Theater
presents the true story

of "The War of the Worlds."

(EERIE NOTE)

Yeah, radio makes sense for you.
You have the face for it.

Now, the story of the radio program

that panicked a nation
has been told for decades.

But there's very little evidence

that any such panic actually occurred.

Our tale begins
with the hair-raising fact

that very few people even heard
"The War of the Worlds,"

because it aired at the same time

as one of the most popular
radio shows in the country,

ventriloquist Edgar Bergen's
comedy hour.

Say hello, Charlie.

"Hello, Charlie."

I like it cause
he doesn't move his mouth.

I assume. It is the radio.

Wow, people must've been
really bored in the past.

In fact, a survey conducted
that very night found that

only 2% of Americans even heard
"The War of the Worlds."

(WHISTLING DOWN)

Only 2%?

Then why did everyone riot?

Well, the fact is,

we're not sure anyone actually did.

After the broadcast,
newspapers did describe

chaos in the streets.

Extry! Extry!

"War of the Worlds"
causes mass panic...

is what we'd like you to believe.

(SCREAMS)

Riot! Aah! Did you hear the radio?!

Yes, I heard the radio!

But later eyewitness accounts

said that cities were
actually calm that night.

I don't know what he's talking about.

Those streets were emptier than
my dance card on a Friday night.

(CRICKET CHIRPING)

And there were no follow-up reports

of any deaths or serious injuries.

It seemed that newspapers
were just sensationalizing

a few anecdotal accounts.

So, it was 1930s clickbait?

Why would they make that up?

Because these ink-stained
wretches saw the radio

as their competition.

The radio could report
the news instantly.

So, it was a threat
to the newspapers' business.

Here I am in the newsroom,

ready to type my story
about the Hindenburg crash,

now to turn on the radio

and get some background music.

Mommy! Ehrhrhr...

It's a home run! Ehrhrhr...

Ladies and gentlemen,
a terrible tragedy,

the Hindenburg has crashed,
oh, the humanity!

Ahh, scooped again by the radio.

We gotta find a way to make
these Marconi maroons

sound unreliable.

Think, think, think, think...

I got it!

So newspapers seized
on "The War of the Worlds"

as an opportunity
to discredit the radio.

They published anecdotal accounts

of the few people who were fooled...

Hmm, my brother's boss's uncle
said that he believed it.

I'll put that in the story.

And published anti-radio editorials.

(RECITING)

(SCRAPE, DING)

This manipulative myth was
repeated again and again

until Americans actually believed

there had been a real mass panic.

My word, you can't trust
anything you hear on the radio.

Are ventriloquists fake too?

The public bought
this story so thoroughly

that decades later,
when Orson Welles was

on the radio
during the Pearl Harbor attack,

people thought he was faking that, too.

I am shocked to announce

American forces have been
attacked at Pearl Harbor.

Yeah, right, fool us once,
Bore-son Smells.

Ahh, yes, see if I care.

I'm gonna get drunk
and do commercials for peas.

That's not scary.

That's sad.

Orson, who are you?

The irony is,

the newspapers were actually right,

the public really was
at risk of being fooled

by an unscrupulous media.

But it wasn't the radio.

The true villains were
the newspapers themselves.

And that is the scariest story of all.

(CACKLING) No, it isn't.

The original story was way scarier.

That was just a lesson
on journalism ethics.

I'm tired of lies and hoaxes.

I want something real on Halloween.

Something terrifying.

(STATIC CRACKLING)

Okay, here's the deal.

I can talk to the dead,

and I'm on TV.

Hold on, I'm feeling a presence.

It's Napoleon, he's says I'm for real.

Like her, people who can
reach across dimensions

and speak to the dead.

Now, that's scary.

Oh, mediums are the biggest hoaxes.

They don't talk to the dead at all.

I wish you couldn't talk to me.

Shut up, okay, welcome back
to "The Jersey Shore-acle."

I transcend dimensions,
I speak to spirits,

I live off Exit Nine off the turnpike.

So, today, I have been
summoned to the home

of an adorable little boy

and his adult friend
who he barely knows.

My name is Stuart,
and I'm 12 years old.

I'd say I'm a pretty happy kid.

That is, until it showed up.

Its name is Adam,

and he's making Halloween
really not scary.

Eh.

So I'm hoping the Jersey Shore-acle

can connect me with a dead relative.

Or a murderer.

Whichever's more terrifying.

Hello, it's so nice to meet you.

- Thank you for having me.
- I sensed you needed it,

good, you sat down, okay,

- we're gonna start this, are you ready?
- Yeah.

All right, now before we start,

I do have a couple of questions, okay?

I need you to tell me...

That mediums are scammers who
prey on your grief for money?

What is this?

It's in my contract no one
can have bigger hair than me.

Adam, she's going
to contact the dead for me.

It's an age-old tradition.

It sure is, a tradition of faking it

and ripping people off.

S�ances first became popular in America

during the 19th century,

when three young ladies
named the Fox sisters

started charging admission

to watch them
communicate with the dead.

If there be any ghosts in this room,

may they knock.

(KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK)

And if those ghosts think
people should give us money,

also knock.

- (KNOCKING)
- (GASPS)

As they grew up, the Fox sisters became

bona-fide celebrities,

touring and holding packed sessions

multiple times a day.

Sorry, darling,
we couldn't possibly fit you in,

we're talking to Shakespeare
and Attila the Hun at noon.

But later in life,
Maggie Fox spilled the beans

and revealed
how they tricked their public,

making knocking sounds
using an apple on a string

and writing secret messages
with their feet.

I feel the spirit...

wait for it...

(ADAM) Despite Maggie's confession,
the spiritualism movement

continued to this day,

and modern mediums still make bank.

Famous mediums even
have best-selling books

and hit TV shows.

Yes, TV shows that are totally real!

That's right, the higher the
hair, the closer to heaven,

okay, enough chit-chat,
let's start this reading.

Oh, yeah, I'm feeling
something very powerful.

Oh, yeah, it's a presence.

Did you lose someone with a J name,

like a John, a Jack, a Julia...

Yes, my grandpa's name was Jason.

Bam! That's it.

Okay... oh, oh...

oh, I'm feeling a pain.

Oh, yeah, in my chestal area.

Is there any type of thing that
happened in that region area?

Yes, he... he died of lung cancer.

Bada-bingo, what you think about that,

Mr. Everything, huh?

Okay, so... your grandfather's
telling me, oh,

something about a book, why?

- Why?
- Uh...

I think he owned a book.

- And I saw it once.
- That's it. That's it.

He wants me to tell you
he cherishes those moments,

and he loves you.

Boom, shut up, I'm done.

That was amazing!

How do you explain that?

Simple, she was doing a cold reading.

Uh... who this?

You're not a spirit,
I did not summon you.

Okay, can we cut?

- (BELL RINGING)
- This is Mark Edward.

He's a magician who went
undercover as a psychic medium

to research how they scam people.

I used to do everything
she does for a living,

and I can tell you
exactly how it's done.

Cold reading is a series
of questions and statements

that mine you for information,
without you even knowing it.

First, the medium lists

common names to guess at a match.

And they start with just the initial

so that you fill in the blank.

Oh. Yeah.

I know tons of people with J names.

And lots of them are dead.

Mediums then offer details
which sound specific

but are actually quite generic.

Chest pains could be
lung cancer, heart disease,

or really anything.

No, no, I sensed that
he died because of

something in the chest.

Or the head.

Uh-huh? Definitely
somewhere in the body.

Finally, she offered a question
phrased like a statement

to make you do the work
and make a connection.

Honey, sugar, the book.

It was real, right?

Actually, no.

Grandpa hated books.

Now that I'm thinking of it,
I was thinking of his TV Guide.

By using questions
that could apply to anyone

and judging your body language
to see how you respond,

mediums manipulate you

into thinking they know things
nobody else could know.

And since they often work
in group settings,

if they don't get it right,

they just move on
to someone else in the room.

I mean, how about you, haircut?
You know something about a book?

No... somebody here must know
something about a book.

Ugh!

Why did I ever buy this?

Well, cold reading
often seems supernatural

because it's a truly amazing skill.

But that's all it is.

A really good magic trick.

And while there's nothing wrong
with a little illusion,

it is straight-up unethical

to take advantage
of other people's grief

for your own gain.

I've even seen people lose
their entire savings

because a medium convinced them
to hand it over.

You scammer! How do you
even sleep at night?

Okay, calm down.

Everyone just take a minute,

close your eyes, okay,
just imagine smoke or whatever.

Poof, I'm gone.

It's time for me to go, too.

Just kidding.

It's an editing trick.

Ugh!

Nerds!

I'm surrounded by nerds!

I thought this was going to be
the scariest Halloween ever,

but apparently it's all a big fake!

I want chaos!

I want horror!

I wanna be so terrified
my hair turns white,

and I pee my pants!

I wanna be scared for real.

Well, be careful
what you wish for, Stuart,

because the truth is...

there's plenty to be
scared of on Halloween.

- (THUNDER CRASHES)
- (SCREAMING)

Oh, wow, did that
actually frighten you?

No, I just realized
you're gonna be here longer.

Don't enen try to scare
me Adam, it won't work.

Strangers aren't poisoning candy.

No one can talk to the dead.

And Orson Welles didn't even
make people panic

with "The War of the Worlds."

Nothing is scary,
because everything's fake.

You're right, you don't
need to be scared of

any of that fake stuff.

Because the truth is,

the real world is the scariest of all.

- What do you mean?
- Think about it.

Even though there was
no mass panic over a radio play,

the story of "The War of the Worlds"

shows how easily we can be manipulated

to distrust others.

I lied to the public
to slander my enemies,

and they all believed me.

Ooh.

And, no, talking to ghosts isn't real,

but you know what's even scarier?

People who take advantage
of our grief and trust

for their own gain.

I turned your precious memories
of your grandfather into cash,

bada-bing, bada-Bruce-Springsteen.

Ugh, that's such a broad stereotype.

And remember that father
who poisoned his own son's

Halloween candy? Yes, why did he do it?

For the insurance money.

See? We don't need to make up ghosts

or aliens or creepy
strangers to be afraid of.

The cruel things ordinary people do

to each other are scary enough.

The real everyday world is
darker and more sinister

than anything you can imagine.

(THUNDER CRASHES)

That's... terrifying.

You're welcome.

?

And then he said that
we can't talk to ghosts,

and... and strangers aren't evil,

and in the past, everyone loved
ventriloquists on the radio.

Oh, honey, I promise you,
nobody likes ventriloquists.

Who was this guy again?

His name was Adam.

He had big hair and... and glasses.

A smile like an uncarved
jack-o-lantern.

Wait... did you meet Adam Conover?

From "Adam Ruins Everything"?

Yeah.

(THUNDER CRASHES)

Stuart...

"Adam Ruins Everything"

has been canceled for 50 years.

(THUNDER CRASHES)

Aah!

(DISTORTED CACKLING)

?

Hello, everybody, I'm here on set

on "Adam Ruins Everything,"
'cause I got way more questions

for Mark Edward, so we got
to know more about this.

You are a magician,
but you worked as a psychic.

Well, because
my background is in magic,

so I started to see

what psychics and mediums were doing.

And I looked at them,

and I knew that it was just a trick.

There was no metaphysical,
spiritual thing going on.

So I was fascinated by why
people would buy into it.

So, how are magic and psychics similar?

How are the fields
similar and different?

Well, because it's a performance art.

Mmm. The only difference is

magic is props and colorful things.

Whereas psychics manipulate emotions.

A magician is in a venue,
you know it's a show.

And when you leave,
you know you've seen

a performance of a magic show.

Mm-hmm. But, for psychics,

the stage show,
or the show that you see,

that is only a prerequisite
to get in your wallet.

What they wanna do is
they want you to see

them perform and get
all these incredible hits

and be... be correct
so that they can get you,

they say later, at the end of the show,

"If you'd like a private reading,

come and talk to my assistant."

- Oh.
- Then they start to get a hook in you,

because the people that come to them

for a private reading afterwards,

that's where the money is.

Now a lot of people say
about mediums, they say,

"Hey, they're not hurting anyone.

- Maybe they're helping those people."
- Right.

"Maybe they're giving them closure... "

Sure.

"They're helping them come
to terms with the death."

What do you think about that?

I think that usually
the people that say that

are not the ones
that've been ripped off.

- Mmm.
- There are people who think they are

seeing somebody be helped by it.

But most of the people
who... are bereaved

and who are of loss or...

a murdered child or anything like that,

they want any kind of
information they can get

so they're very vulnerable.

Right, 'cause
if you don't want to accept

that that person's gone from your life,

and you can go
to that psychic every week,

and... and they'll give you
a new message from that person.

- That's right, that's right.
- You'll come back week after week.

And you have to remember,
the more times you do it,

the more that person has
picked up on little

telltale signs that allow them

to make these psychological leaps,

and then you hear my favorite phrase,

which I've heard thousands of times,

which is, "There is no way in the world

he could've known that about me."

They're selling hope.
It's just like a drug.

It's like an addiction.

You want more, you want more,

little bits, they feed
little bits, little bits.

The medium takes away that person's...

real chance to get over that

and... and grieve.

Is there any ethical way
to be a psychic?

If you find somebody
you can sit down and talk to,

and they can give you some advice...

I don't have a problem with that.

There are 5% of people
out there who are

compassionate, kind individuals,

who really are just intuitive.

See? But when you balance the 5%

against the 95% of all the scumbags,

it's... it's kind of
like "buyer beware."

I mean, I used to tell people
that one of the things,

when I was on the phone,
is I messed around with

the idea of throwing
some skepticism into it.

Just to see if...
what people would say.

Hmm.

They would say,
"I need some lotto numbers."

And I'd say, okay,
here's some lotto numbers.

And they're like, "Gee,
thanks, thanks a lot."

And then I'd say "I didn't say
they were winning lotto numbers,"

- you know.
- (LAUGHING)

And then I would say to them,

I would say, look, if I could do this,

why would I be talking
to you, you know?

Use some common sense.
That's all this is.

Well, thank you so much
for coming on the show

to talk to us about this, Mark.

Thank you for having me.

And thank you folks for watching.

We'll see you next time.

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