Original subtitles

Thank heaven

for little girls... shit

Okay

Let's go

Think this is our girls? This poor son of

a bitch reeks

of pussy and gunpowder of course it's

our girls

Wow

Report of another sighting, we're going

the wrong way. Pick a direction, sluts!

Dammit

Now

mitzi okay never better

I'm too fucked up to know for sure

but the wreck didn't harsh my buzz

so we'll call that okay

party ain't over but looks like we're

gonna have to hoof it for a while

I have to get back to my dorm I have a

test in the morning. So do I

sex ed final. Kenny I'm being

seflous

don't be an asshole about this please

you kiss me and shut me down and I'm the

asshole?

Well I'm not the one who wanted to go

park. Well

what am I supposed to do with this? I

don't care what you do with it but keep

it away from me

sometimes I really don't get you Kelly

after finals are over we can go back to

that cute little motel by the beach and

you can have your way with me. Yeah yeah

you said that last time and you spent

the entire weekend

puking on everything. You shouldn't have

gotten me drunk. You got yourself drunk

you didn't need any help from me. Well I

don't remember you having a problem with

it at the time

I'm amazed to remember anything at all

was I supposed to get all hot and

bothered at the sight of you hurling

strawberry daiquiris everywhere and

stumbling around the room like a retard?

The r word Kenny

Sorry to bother you love birds but my

girls and I have run into a bit of

car trouble

nice hot rod. Thanks it's a 1960.

I wasn't talking about the car

Ken NY let's go

you're not going anywhere! Hey what is

this what gives?

You hear that girls Romeo here wants to

know what gives

he's about to find out the hard way. Who

are you what do you want?

You are lucky we came along and we did

honey looked like house and over here

weren't going to take no for an answer that's

none of your business. I make it my

business

out of the car hot lips. Calm down we'll

do what you say

that's for sure

it's our lucky day. I don't understand

what's happening? Careful mitzi

that's a nice sweater take it off. What?

Do you have a hearing problem tinkerbell?

She said take it off. You have no right

might makes right

and we've got all the rights now

hey that's my purse

Kelly just do what they say they've got

a gun. Yeah Kelly

we've got a gun choir boy here's a smart

nothing but makeup tampons and plastic

no green. Hmm downy fresh

it's Chanel I don't use downy. It's

Chanel

aren't you a peach? Everybody just calm

down

please stop with the waterworks before

you drown yourself. Please just take the

car and go

look boy wonder we take whatever we want

whenever we want. Carolyn, duffel bag

first things first

I'm gonna take ioverboy here for a ride

this is what you want what the fuck are

you doing stop

stop what she's raping my boyfriend he

was asking for it

Fuck

that totally killed the mood I could

have seen that coming

waste Poindexter here and let's get

moving didn't even get to take my ride

oh god no sorry slick you heard the lady

Cute couple bummer

Hey the party isn't over is it? No way

just a hiccup but we do need food fuel

and ammo

there's this place I've heard about on

the edge of town where we happen to be

not sure if I believe it even exists but

if it does

and it's even half as batshit as I've

heard

we're in for some fun

UN fucking believable

UN fucking believable look at these camel

jockey sons of bitches

freedom hating baby killing fuckers

die you sons of bitches you towel head

Good evening ladies and welcome to uh

Wendell's

cafe the only uh 24-hour

donut coffee and convenience shop this

side of the county line

may I suggest the bagels?

They're fresh. You can keep the cream

puffs pal we're here for the fire power

excuse me what

the fire power is that what you said

heard right pops. You're trying to

purchase firearms

we're only legally allowed to sell

ammunition

and I'm not sure I can even sell you

you look like you're still driving with

your learner's permit. Don't let the good

looks fool you mr donut

you've got guns and we want them simple

math. You girls don't need guns

maybe we think we do. Yeah maybe we're

out necking in our car and some robbers

roll up on us

we have to be able to protect ourselves

all right look be good little girls and

go home

daddy's probably waiting to read you a

bedtime story complete with cookies and

milk. Don't count on it

what would girls like you need with a

gun anyway? That's none of your concern

Barney

it's a free country with a right to

privacy and a right to bear arms

sign says cash only we've got the cash

and we want to buy some guns

for one thing, the name is Wendell not

Barney

ma'am - your reasoning taken into

consideration

your request fully evaluated and your

out of the question. What do you mean out

of the question? Knock it off mitzi

I told you both to let me do the talking

listen honey

I'm an independent businessman an

American citizen

a veteran of foreign wars I pay my

goddamn taxes

and I got a sign out front it says I'm

the proprietor of this establishment

and I reserve the right to refuse

service to anyone

especially big mouth tramps running

around in Hollywood

hooker outfits looking for trouble. Hold

on a minute buster. No you hold on

I didn't come back from desert storm

carrying my buddy home in a cardboard

to open a 24-hour doughnut and ammo

shop to take lip off punk whores like

you're out of your goddamn depth and you

have now crossed the fuckin line. Final

warning captain fuck face

we're not leaving until we get what we

want. Please

for your information I've been to Iraq I

spent my youth

in the eye of the desert storm I've

survived

three ied detonations

improvised explosive devices

so if you think I'm shaking in my boots

over here because some

little hard body high school dropout

with an attitude

is pointing a gun at me you got another

thing coming

and let me tell you something else I

didn't bring my buddies body parts home

in a cardboard

fuckin box so that you...

Have you even heard of desert storm?

We didn't come here for a history lesson

full metal Jack off

now drop the shotgun before I drop you

I got the high ground missy, now go on get

Mitzi grab his cash, Carolyn as much ammo

as you can carry

38 slugs and shotgun shelves he's gotta

have more guns around here

Jackpot

Okay

ma'am we got the bastard that killed

your baby... he was a Nazi

What a mess it's gotta be them

our one eyewitness says that the dead

guy inside murdered the baby and then

the three girls attacked him after that

you're not suggesting that these three

twats

are heroes? We don't even know if

these are the same girls

and honestly probably doing the world of

favor this Wendell cat

he's on several watch lists. Ours?

He's one bad day's donut receipt away

from blowing up a federal building

I'll stake my badge on this

being a robbery turned homicide and

the work of our three little angels

50 to one odds. No bet Cannon

we ain't heard the last of these

jezebels

we'll get a positive ID soon

agents uh we have security footage

yep that's a positive match with the cam

footage from the strip club

same girls all right you know what

really flips my chitlin switch mcmurphy

the flagrancy of it how they just prance

around

like the world owns them fuckin

everything. All right look

I understand they're a little brazen but

not any more than any other criminal

gang around here

and I guarantee nobody's going to miss

these victims. Bullshit!

Look don't blow a fuse Cannon we'll find

them. We're going to find them

fuck them fry them and forget them

figuratively

I need a drink to keep my eyes on the

road

we need to keep moving we can't be far

from the border now

hey Carolyn how does a drink sound? Peachy

next shithole we see... bartender where's

My fuckin whiskey man

about fuckin time you back there growing

the corn yourself

the fuck you looking at? Keep the change

yeah I know there is no change but keep

it anyway

what is this a fuckin fag bar? Where's

the pussy action around here

three Tequila shots poor favor

you girls know they don't serve minors

here

you her babysitter

it's not like I'm gonna turn you in

things are finally looking up around

here

hey I want to talk to you we're in a

rush

dad we're just here to refuel and white

line it back out of here

you want to whiteline it?

Well get out your keys we can have a

private meeting in the bathroom

sounds like a real fun time but we'll

pass

we got off to a bad start you uh you

ladies got names

yeah snap crackle and pop. You're real

cute

I would have pegged you for a destiny you

for a

candy and you for a iexus

speaking of iexus, mine's out front. You girls

want to go for a

ride. A ride to where? To the emergency room

or the cemetery? What's that supposed to

mean? I know it's cryptic

but you'll figure it out eventually

fresh baby lamb chops

moss after a rain

citrus. What?

The three flavors of a woman. Ew.

Bet this guy holds a county record for

restraining orders. I like your style

mouthy but when god damn sexy fuckin bitch

I don't know how to thank you so I won't

you don't have to thank me

I call like I see it women like a man

who calls the shots. Oh do we now?

That's right baby lay one on

God damn bitches I will fuck your asses

black and blue I'm gonna fuck you

sideways you dumb

Cunt

This is funny to you I like your

attitude this guy's a constant pain in

my ass

he's running off business. Unfortunately

we're pretty bad for business too

empty out the register. Hey it's cool I

just work here don't shoot

don't shoot him he's cute. M

get the money

keep this for yourself

Full stop

Christmas tits this is happening right

it's her favorite band. Bard gainsworth is

a living wet dream

girls remember when we first met and we

made a pact that we were going to take

our due hell or high water no matter

yeah val. Money

drugs weapons it's all penny-ante shit

this. This is love. Love is for suckers

bullshit. We gotta find this bar maldoror

it's at 4400 iincoln street I told you

to ditch your phone

this is how they track people I told you

okay let's go I'm ready to meet me a

rock star

val your shoulder

it's a mosquito bite let's go

Police still don't know the identity

of the suspects who have set social

media ablaze

with some even hailing them as heroes

girl they're just like Bonnie and Clyde

but they're all Bonnie

and there's three of them sex workers

are always being taken advantage of it's

about time they started fighting back

seems to me whoever got killed deserved

police still don't... looks like we got a

face match

99 percent probable ID

val Washington, mitzi

Chandler, Carolyn hills

we got you bitches now. We got nothing

those girls are probably already across

the border by the time we got finished

doing the crime scene

whose side are you on here mcmurphy? You

know whose side I'm on

for Christ's sake I'm just saying those

girls are pros and I have a hunch you'll

find that in the rap sheet

and ain't no pros gonna sit around

waiting to get caught while we mess with

procedures. Well they definitely know

what they're doing

I'll give you that

But sooner or later they're gonna fuck

I know women like this sure hope you're

right dick

I know women

Val this is a bad idea

there's gonna be hundreds of people in

there. Hundreds of scurrying roaches when

we come in guns blazing

Carolyn let's have some firepower

I'm just saying we've got a shitload of

money

and drugs we're set we're

almost to the border can we please not

fuck this up?

Christmas tits bard gainesworth

do you really think I'm gonna miss this

opportunity

when I said we were gonna take whatever

we wanted it wasn't tough talk

I meant it

Carolyn you good

this looks like a party to me. Right let

us pray

god Grant me the hostility to destroy

the things I cannot change

the malice to maim the things I can and

the wisdom to ignore the difference

amen let's do this

Alright club maldoror, it's Christmas tits!

I see what you like about him

You bard gainesworth, rockstar

consider this a friendly kidnapping

everyone else

Okay please don't hurt anyone

we'll do whatever you say. Good boy let's

Carolyn give him one of those pills to

calm him down

Good boy that'll make this easier

I'm val this is mitzi and Carolyn you're

my date

that means mitt's off Carolyn

we're a gang. Good show back there

um thanks

just relax bright boy we've got a little

driving to do

how about some mood music

All right that'll do uh if you

think of anything else you can give me a

call okay

you said they would mess up said they'd

fuck up

not sure if this constitutes one of

those at least

no one got killed this time. That we know

of... look we still have a missing singer

maybe a kidnapping but honestly with

this crew I

would not rule out a homicide. I don't

think homicide they wanted this guy

for some reason. Ransom I don't know

I don't think this band or their fans

have any money. Damn right

still no idea on the vehicles by now who

knows how far these bitches might have

gotten

apbs turned up nothing but these girls

are gonna fuck up

soon and when they do

fight

look that was real smooth back there but

we can't keep pushing our luck

pushing our luck? You're not going soft

on me are you?

We had nothing to lose before but look

at us now

we're set now. We're set when I say we're

set

What was in those pills? Beats us

feels so good right now

you bet your sweet ass we need a no-tell

motel and fast

while lover boy here's still in the mood. We

should be at the border soon

home free. I don't think I can wait

I'm down here but I'm also up there

on the moon. So, bard

how did you end up in that shit hole

the label wants us to expand new territories. Last album didn't

move enough units?

The last album was good I mean it didn't

do good

some people just don't understand it yet

the general public has no taste

it's tough being a tortured artist right

glrls

you get me! The border

oh shit and I think there's a motel up

there too

Cash

Gun door

jawol

I remember we hadn't done towels for the

room yet fresh towels?

Okay thanks and don't worry I won't tell

anyone about you guys

wait a minute grab him

What do you mean you won't tell anyone

about what I mean

I kind of know who you guys are I read

about you online

and of course I know who bard

gainesworth is

hi bard I'm a huge fan of the Christmas

tits. It's just Christmas tits

no 'the'. I just think you guys are cool

well you should have kept your mouth

shut you dumb shit

now we gotta kill you. Wait wait wait let

me just say to bard

I was gonna come see your band man but

I'm stuck on this shift

it's really crazy you know nothing ever

happens in this town

18 years of living here nothing and then

in one night

the two coolest things that have ever

happened the Christmas tits

playing at club maldoror. Christmas tits

no 'the

Christmas tits playing a club maldoror

and poltergasm playing the same night

at cafe schwa

and I'm stuck here on this shit job

but then the third coolest thing that's

ever happened is you guys show up

you're all amazing I love how you just

don't give a fuck! Well it's just great

that we all have a fan club here but

you know who we are and we can't just

let you walk away from that. Look just

let me hang out with you guys for a

little bit you can

you can take me as a hostage. That's a

terrible idea

did you say poltergasm was playing yeah

poltergasm is actually my favorite band

mine too! Ah she's got

the bans pictures a" over her locker at

work

no dice kid we don't want or need an

entourage

check it out I can get into the motel

safe we haven't done a deposit

all the receipts for the week are still

in there you can have those seriously

just

just let me hang out with you guys for

like one night and then you can drop me

off at the next town or whatever

no way. You know I could

get you the money you could kidnap me

or shit...

Are those drugs? Let me do some drugs

with you

take me to the next town and shoot me

there just let me have one cool thing

happen to me for once in my whole life

you're not really convincing me. I am

gonna die in this shithole either way

let me

help you. That wouldn't be a terrible

idea

having a hostage if we got into any

problems with Johnny law we can just use

him as a human shield

back to poltergasm they're playing this

town

no about 25 miles north, cafe schwa

you got to thing for this band mitzi? You

know how you feel about bard there?

Xerox from poltergasm is that guy for me

since I was 13. But we should not be

heading back north

egghead here may have just talked

himself into a stay of execution

well the show's probably over now anyway

oh no shows at cafe schwa always start

super late

look I can take you girls there and I

know where all the cops have their speed

traps I can get you there and back here

no sweat

I know the back way into the club I can

be your tour guide

and look out. We should probably just

hold up here for the night. No way sis

what are the god damn chances our two

favorite rock stars would be playing the

bumblefuck border town in the same night

it's kismet

this is just too crazy. There is no such

thing as

too crazy do you love him or not? Xerox

rhodesia?

I mean yeah but that's celebrity worship

that's not the same thing as love

it's exactly the same

look this thing is in your face right

and we could be dead tomorrow

hostage let's go for a ride

So then I dropped out of high school to

take a job at the motel

I tried to do some online courses but

they were so boring

you seem to be an expert on boring

up to this stop sign and then take a

fight

are we going back to the show? It's gonna

be a show all right

Tonight we're gonna dress you up

Look at all these fucking people where

do they all come from

get off your feet

Bard gainsworth is that you

so is this what all the extreme bands are

doing for attention these days?

Zerox hi

no buddy this isn't me

it's all these ladies

ladies zerox rhodesia

I want you to meet your biggest fan, m

m, zerox

uh this is a rather strange introduction

you seem no stranger to strange you're

coming with us

the rest of you dorks amscray!

Well I suppose I have no choice in the

matter

you need to back the fuck up

Okay bill

what TV show you like

twilight zone what TV show do you like

Fred flintstone. Yeah that's a good one

look bill the show's over. Show's over?

Yeah bill exits over there. Exit's over

there?

Yes bill. Okay

bye now

got it handled? Handled are we done here?

M grab your boy and let's motor

I'm mitzi I'm sorry we fucked up your

show

I wish I could have seen more of it

there will be other shows I suppose

that is if you don't murder us

I don't think they're gonna kill us man

hey give him some of those drugs

who's giving the orders here?

Give him some of those drugs. Oh yeah

this is good stuff

I'll take your word for it. Hey do you

got any

more of those... shut the fuck up and

navigate nerd

I go bowling tomorrow

thank you miss that'll be all. Thank you

sir that is that is all. That's all?

Yes sir

mcmurphy you got anything? Pro job in and

out just like last time

but why would pros hang around the same

place

and commit two crimes like this in the

same night it's erratic

which may indicate a flaw in their

methodology. Precisely kid

that's what makes this gang so

impossible to predict

like all women they're crazy as fuck

it flips my chitlin switch to call these

whores pros

when they're just doing typical

irrational crazy

female bullshit and we're standing here

with our goddamn thumbs up our asses

I wonder what the next move will be

Christ that was a long time coming

Mitzi Carolyn make bard and zerox comfy

cut up some drugs sun will be up soon

9° 9° 9° 9° 9°

Let's all get to know each other

Carolyn I'm sorry we don't have a rock

star for you

if this cream puff isn't entertainment

enough

go ahead and kill him

let's live the fantasy fantasy fantasy

Are you okay

slight headache but yeah

it's been an unusual day

no shit listen

I think these girls are zonked if you

want to get out of here their keys are

on the table

I don't think we're in any danger. I'm

just saying if you wanted to go

I can get you out of here. Are you ready

to leave?

I don't know

I can't say I'm having a bad time

but listen we do not want to be

implicated in whatever

shit these girls have been doing

far as anybody else in the world knows

we're kidnap victims

as long as we can keep that story

straight

maybe we have a chance to walk out of

here

provided we don't get killed first

that's the chance you take

every time you walk across the stream

getting killed

hey do you want a bagel

I'd love a bagel

We have some intel it's about fucking

time we got

nothing from the perimeter roadblock

which means that either they snuck over

before we had a chance to get into place

or they're masters of camouflage. Look

at this

That's a hell of a rap sheet looks like

they met up at sandhurst

beat up a guard and staged a daring

daylight escape

three girls three hard luck stories

Washington, valinda starr broken home

father in prison she had a series of

minor drug and weapons charges

petty larceny receiving stolen goods

went to jail on aggravated assault

shot her boyfriend apparent domestic

situation

possibly some abuse at the hands of the

boyfriend he survives

presses charges she gets locked up

Chandler, mitzy Ann only survivor of a

drunk driving accident parents killed

grew up in an orphanage string of minor

shoplifting charges

vandalism jailed for grand larceny broke

into a cell phone store

and stole twenty thousand dollars worth

of phones and accessories

hills, Carolyn Marie long dss sheet

real rough home situation in and out of

foster and treatment homes ran away

hot wired a car promptly drove it into a

church

Mcmurphy I think we can chalk

all of this up to one thing. What's that

daddyissues

you really think it's that simple? Daddy

issues?

Yep always is. Daddyo

daddyo wake up wake up

rise and shine sunshine

Ladies up and at em

what time is it? Time doesn't matter

I'm still alive. I'm starving to death

we should get food and keep heading

south. That's not the plan

there's a plan already? I've been

thinking

this is the first time since I was a

little girl that I felt

anything remotely resembling happiness

we've got the world on a charm bracelet

and these are the charms

I can't help but feel like Carolyn's

getting the shit end of the stick. How do

you mean?

Who's your bard? You're zerox? Val, it

doesn't matter

okay I'm fine. It's Danny iucifer. Is that right

I mean yeah but... but

nothing it's time we 86 goober patrol

over here and got you with the program

wow I mean it's not like Danny iucifer

is going to be just up the road like

these guys were. Do you know that? No

but I don't... but nothing we're all equals here

what are you even fucking talking about?

Equal loot for equal work Carolyn deserves just as

much as us

and we're on a mission now find Danny

iucifer. Val this is dumb

love is not dumb. Love? What are you even

fucking talking about are you still high?

You'll thank me for this. Val you really

shouldn't push this we really should

just keep heading south. I didn't request

your input mitzi. This is fucking crazy

nothing is crazy

fine. Where the hell are you going

to the car to get my fucking purse is

that okay?

All right

So then I got really into this guy unamuno

he basically said that

what makes us human is the fact that we

suffer

so if you turn away from suffering you

turn away from being human

ugh what a grotesque philosophy

I know it really resonated with me

I like Jon Stewart mill he said that we

are essentially free to do

whatever gives us pleasure so long as it

doesn't bring harm

or hurt anyone else. Sounds like crowley

do without wilt

sort of but crowley leaves out the part

about not hurting anyone

kind of like our hosts here

I have his home address. Who? Danny

iucifer. How'd you get his address?

I walked to the pay phone and called

information, val it's northwest of here

about eight hours we'd be going back

over the border. All right troops

grab your gear and get ready. Just think

this through this is a bad idea

I've thought it through it's a great

idea. It's a huge risk people know who we

are now

are we famous? Every man and woman is a

star

for 15 minutes. Alistair warhol? Yes!

What makes you think anyone knows who we

are? Remember

the clerk he read about us. Oh yeah

everybody loves you guys ok fuck face

now do we shoot you

or tie you up and dump you out in the

desert I realized Carolyn you may have

grown somewhat

attached in your drug stupor. I I vote

for the plan where you don't kill me

we're not gonna kill you are we val

whatever but we're ditching him. Going

north will be suicide val

get real. Fuck reality I'm following a

higher calling here

and you do well to appreciate who I'm

doing this for. Come on we can at least

take him so far as Danny iucifer's house

fight

I fucking love dating iucifer. Me too

oh for fuck's sake. He's been a good

hostage all along val

and besides we could still use him as a

human shield

that we talked about for when we go back

over the border

you guys are bound and determined to

fuck up my great idea. Please and thank

you

fucking fine everybody get ready

Cannon get ready

we got a break. What do you got Murphy? We

got our guys to try to run to see if

there's any

credit card or cell phones in the girls

names got nothing

we did note that mitzi Chandler's cell

phone service

was on a family plan so we ran that to

see if there's any

possible family members that we could

possibly interview

and and turns out the ping that we got

came from across the border

same place where our rockstars got abducted

family going home for a visit? Or

she has two phones. What kind of a

lunatic would have two phones? Either way

it's a definite hit on our fugitives

so we call in the state department

nope here's the good part

the first phone ping that we got came

from across the border

that was a couple hours... a couple of

hours ago?

The second phone ping that we got

came just a couple minutes ago that was

northwest

back in the states. Back in the states?

Hot damn on rye, saddle up

let's go get them

So you just scared the guy? Relax

funny face it was just a warning shot

over his head one to knock out the phone

and one to empty out the register

I tied him up while Carolyn pumped the gas

Not going so far as to equate crime and

art... well

although you could make that argument

I'm just saying that

if your art isn't destroying your life

then maybe you're not arting hard

enough

all the good poetry has already been written. What

about your songs?

Bard how does it feel to be famous

a famous kidnao victim? No baby doll

before that, a famous rock star

I', not a rock star. What about you zerox

are you a rock star? I find the term

distasteful

isn't this a hoot we have the two best

rock stars on the planet in this stolen

car

and neither one of them thinks that

they're actually rock stars

I hope Danny iucifer is more honest than

these guys hey

fart face how does it feel to be a

nobody oh wait

don't bore me with your answer

The body count continues well we're

headed in the right direction

we just need Chandler to keep checking

that phone and then we zero in and make

examples of these sorry ass slags

it's not just them we're up against you

know

it's a whole culture that sees these

as some kind of folk heroes half of our

already difficult job

is to expose them for what they are. Do

you really think

that people are going to see these girls

as heroes given all the lives they

destroyed?

Wholesale murder kidnapping armed

robbery

families torn apart it would be a

different story if they were men

it really would but they are not men

they are girls

very bad girls

Who wants pills?

God damn sexy fuckin bitch

What's the worst thing you've ever done

besides my last album? No really

the worst thing like I don't mean from

society's perspective

but your own for example

I don't consider shooting the owner of a

strip club or a drug dealer as

bad maybe society wouldn't either

but personally the worst thing I've ever

done

I know what that is

well when I was 13 before I ran away

my mom had this boyfriend named buddy

I didn't like him but I guess he was

nice to my mom

anyway so buddy got this good job out of

state

and my mom wanted to move us out there

I had a boyfriend at the time Tommy

he was my first real boyfriend

and I didn't want to leave him

so I gave Tommy a handjob and used a

pair of old panties to wipe

everything up

I threw the dirty panties in the back of

buddy's car and told my mom that I'd

seen him parked making out in the back

seat with Brenda donaldson

she was this girl from school that I

mom didn't believe it at first

till she found the panties. Holy shit.

Val

yeah needless to say they broke up

but mom was trying to call the cops on

buddy because Brenda was my age

and so he had to get out of town right

away and then Brenda even got taken out

of school

over it later

I realized that I had ruined my mother

from

ever being able to love another person

again like

ever

then Tommy dumped me. Sounds like you

deserved it, shit

he didn't dump me over that though he

dumped me because he found some other

girl who would blow him

you should have appreciated those hand

jobs. Zip it, dickless

you're talking about the worst thing you

ever did

val you've done 10 things worse than

that in the last day

then what about you what's the worst

thing you ever did

I don't know I have to think about it

let someone else go first

I'll go. When I was a kid I went to this

private catholic school

a good catholic boy? Ex-catholic

anyway I went to the school and one year

there was a new kid

Arthur squint Arthur was a black kid the

only black kid in school maybe the only

black kid that had ever gone there

I don't know anyway I was happy that

Arthur was there because

until he showed up I was kind of the

number one most outcast picked on kid

we would talk to each other on the

playground at recess because we

sort of had that in common one day the

popular kids started picking on me worse

than ever before

it was because I'd been nice to Arthur

they started shoving me calling me names

calling me n lover

you can say the n word in this car

they were shoving me and calling me

names and

I don't know if I was scared to get beat

up but in retrospect

I think that I just wanted the popular

kids to like me

so I said I'll show you and I went over

to where Arthur was sitting

reading his book and I punched him in

the face

as hard as I could I don't think it hurt

him much

physically but I broke his glasses

and I just remember standing there and

staring at those broken glasses on the

ground and feeling the most horrible

sadness

all the other kids just laughed

Arthur didn't cry he just stood up and

picked up his glasses and walked away

without saying a word

I waited until I got home

to cry and then I cried I bawled my eyes

out

his parents took him out of school the

next day yeah

and I went right back to being the

number one outcast

nothing had changed. Children are

extremely cool

but I shouldn't have been one of them I

think about that kid in those stupid

broken glasses almost every day

but you realize you were wrong and

you're a better person for it

you can't beat yourself up forever bard

Brad my real name is Brad

god damn it fuck

what? This fucking asshole is

cruising in the left Lane

what? The left Lane is for fucking

passing and this idiot is just cruising

it under the speed limit

for Christ's sake

Hey hey

hey asshole the left Lane is for fucking

passing

Jesus fuck val! What? The guy was slowing

us down

you're the one wanting us to get to

Danny iucider's quick time so we could

get back over the border

god damn it val you're the only one who

cares about this Danny iucifer fools

errand

and we won't even make it there with the

attention you just drew. Carolyn

you want to see Danny iucifer right? Look

we are

this close to having everything on our

terms

maybe we are but dumb shit like that is

gonna fuck it up

100 percent. Driving 50 miles an hour behind

some dipshit is going to fuck us up 100 percent

for fuck's sake val

there are other cars on the road people

have cell phones. So?

We're gonna be reported we're not

exactly non-descfi pt

we're fucked now okay

okay calm your tits

we'll get a new set of wheels we've been

in this sweet ride too long anyhow

we've only got an hour left everybody

take a pill

relax I'll pull us off the next exit

Yeah talk to me

tag where

thank you hey we got a break let's hear

it all right

highway road rage incident called in by

motorists the driver was killed by

gunfire

motors got the tag number of the

assailant the same number that matches

the vehicle that's tied with a couple of

dead bodies we found in the woods

that's 10 miles away from the club that

the girls ran

our girls there's no doubt in my mind

let's go

all right we'll put out an apb maybe

we'll get lucky with the girls phone

again

we've got this wrapped up like day old

fish

So the worst thing I ever did was

pretty dumb but I still feel bad about

it I was in this shitty foster home with

this creepy

gross family so I decided to steal a car

and run away

so I find an unlocked car and the keys

are up in the visor

just like in the movies who does that

anyway so I steal the car but I didn't

really know how to drive

uh it wasn't as easy as I thought it was

I didn't get very far I kind of

destroyed a church

on accident I mean I hate religion and I

wouldn't feel so bad about it if I meant

this was some poor people's church and I

wrecked it

totally like they couldn't have fixed it

even if they had the money

the judge made me apologize to some

people from the church

and they weren't even mad about it

because they were church people

they just looked at me like okay

maybe that's why I get so fucked up now

bingo. Everybody get in

this car sucks

Only old people and cops drive iincolns

you're the one wanting us to keep a low

profile it doesn't get any lower than

This is all gonna be worth it Carolyn

get ready to meet your destiny when we

find Danny iucifer you'll forget all

about that stupid poor people's church

get us the fuck out of this parking lot

bard how you feeling you need a bump

some more drugs

you feeling good I'm good

zerox you okay? Fresh as a Daisy

can we leave that clerk here? Val no

you promised we'd take him to see Danny

iucifer's house

I never promised anything some of you

assume a lot

fine. Mitzi? Can we just fucking go

Please

Jawol

yeah I ended up fucking a" three at

once

by the time the sun came up they were

begging me to stop

ah all right

I know this is going to flip your

chitlin switch but there's there's no

sign of the girls shit

parking lot phone ping checks out here's

our stolen car though we're almost there

where is there? Our suspects. Yes

but where is there?

I mean

why would these girls come all the way

out here when they were already

scot-free across the border

they're not going home

they're not heading for any major city

we can tell there has to be something so

delicious

out here that they can't resist

but what? Is it something to do with the

rock stars

The rock stars. Maybe they're headed to

the west coast gonna

Rob the rock stars house or hole up... no

not those rock stars

there are three girls the pattern could

suggest

a third kidnapping call it a hunch

but get on the horn and find out if

there are any famous

or semi-famous or even totally washed up

musicians

living within a 100 mile radius of this

Xerox do you have one worst thing you

ever did

the worst thing I ever did I was in

cohege

and I had this roommate Woody

yeah he turned me on a dope

I was a babe in the woods and this

guy

he was full on dealing

Woody had this hot girlfriend

she's a hardcore junkie and one day she

came over

looking for him I guess he was out

selling but

I invited her in she asked if I wanted

to get high

and I wasn't hooked or anything but she

was real cute

so I said okay

anyway she meant do I want to get high

off of Woody stash

and I knew it was a bad idea but she

came back into the room

with stuff she snatched from his hiding

place

as we got settled in she kind of nuzzled

up to me

and it felt really good

so I went with it

then pretty soon we were making out and

then pretty soon we were going all the

way

full on I don't know what happened but

while we were doing it she kind of

died she od'ed

she her body started to shake and I

I thought she was coming but she wasn't

she was dying

and so I stopped I mean I didn't

I didn't finish but then I didn't know

what the hell to do

and I really liked Woody and I knew he

loved this girl

and I didn't know if he'd be more mad at

her dying me fucking her

or the fact that we stole his dope. I

wrapped her up

drove her body to a drainage ditch

shoved her in

and then I tore the house apart to make

it seem like someone had robbed the

place

they never found the girl but weeks after

she went missing but he showed me the

engagement ring that he was planning to

give her

that's it. A lot of your songs

make a whole lot more sense now

that was a long time ago man. Yeah

I kind of forgot about it. I have one

nobody cares dick ass

Do it now

fresh baby lamb chops

moss after a rain

and the last one is citrus

This is the place this doesn't look like

Danny iucifer's house

have you ever seen Danny iucifer's house

before? No. Then how do you know? This is

the address

you gave me if we just drove eight hours

for nothing

if we drove eight hours for nothing it'll

be your fault this again shut the fuck

and look on the porch

okay Christ what do we do now

go in with guns a blazin let's just fing

you want to just go up and ring the

doorbell

like avon calling we could just go up

and ring the doorbell

okay let's just go up and ring the

doorbell

Danny iucifer's fucking doorbell

He's not home maybe he's at band

practice

or maybe he's on tour we have no fucking

idea

we drove all this way

Danny iucifer we're home

Xerox look at this

this is truly magnificent I fucking love

this guy

I hope he is on tour so he can just

squat this place for a month. So what do

we do now?

He's not here I say we take all the

valuables we can

and hump it due south. We can't take Danny

iucifer's stuff we shouldn't even be

touching it

we're staying here until Danny iucifer

gets back damn it val this fucking

obsession

shut up mitzi your selfishness ends here

my selfishness

we're all along on your ride this is the

val show all the way

you say you're doing this for Carolyn

she doesn't give a shit... have you ever

even bothered

to ask me what... I got us out of the

joint

we started with one gun and a pact that

we'd make a whole new world for

ourselves going full well the risks. Yeah

well we might have beat the odds but you

keep moving the goalposts

I was happy when the world we made for

ourselves was a duffel bag full of money

and drugs

the duffel bag Carolyn where the fuck is

the duffel bag

shit I think I left it in the car. Don't

let it out of your sight

go get it. Money and drugs mitzi?

Those would run out fast look at what

fate brought us

don't you see what god or whatever wants

for us

it's this

Love is not kidnapping the posters from

your bedroom wall and drugging them into

liking you. They're not on drugs now

your fucking problem is that you don't

believe in anything... You... the cops are here

what how many? I think just one. We need

the guns from the trunk

looks like there's just one

Mr iucifer we had another report of

fireworks being discharged and

Carolyn the guns

God damn it let's fucking go we can't

stay here

let's go

there's a dead cop on the fucking lawn

okay

okay let's get the fuck out of here

Was it fucking worth it

Melinda Washington mitzi Ann

Chandler Carolyn hills

don't make this hard on yourselves

release

bard gainsworth and derwin hoeffeneger

I'm derwin. I have a plan

shut up no look you guys may

only have a minute before more cops show up

I'm gonna run outside and create a

distraction while you guys try and find

a back way out

no rusty don't. All right pizza face you

go out the front we'll go out the back

I'm coming out it's me derwin

I'm coming out

God damn it hold your fire you assholes

you just killed an unarmed man

oh god rusty! Shoot that one you dumb

shits! No

no no no no no no wait wait wait don't

Ugh

Mcmurphy that's why you don't

hesitate with these bitches

Hell no

Godspeed mcmurphy

What's the eta on backup? Still about

eight minutes

I got eight minutes

we have you surrounded release your

hostages

could you repeat that louder I can't

hear you

eat my snatch pig you'll never take us alive

Carolyn's dead and now we're on a

fucking suicide mission! You want to walk

out that door

go right ahead. I still can't hear you

mitzy Anne Chandler I'm going to call you

on your cell phone to discuss the

release of your hostages

You have another fucking phone? It's an

emergency backup. You led them right to

It's your fault we're here it's your

fault Carolyn's dead

you selfish fucking bitch

have you ever thought about anyone other

than yourself me what about you

you're your twisted idea what the fuck

you think love is you're fucking crazy

I'm not crazy

Nobody his name was rusty

she was better than that we're all

what kind of lunatic carries two fucking

phones

they're gonna kill each other. Yeah I

don't think we're gonna live through

this either

if we don't it's been really nice

getting to know you

derwin. You too, Brad. Hey you know that

story I told you about my

roommate's girlfriend and the dope? Yeah

I made that up

valinda Washington

mitzi Anne Chandler...

Hey hey

why don't you just stop playing Patty

cake and address the situation that's

facing you

outside?

I'm so sorry I got you into this

are you okay oh god

what did I do zerox I'm so sorry

I really do love you this is my fault

no no it's not your fault

this is the worst thing I've ever done

let's see mitzi

Mitzi

Citrus

Valinda Washington it's just me and you

and the hostages now so I won't mince

words

two whore friends I was their kill shot

and I'll be your kill shot too I don't

give a fuck about your hostages

you can kill them or let them walk but I

can promise you

you won't be walking out of this

ah I gott him I got you didn't I

I still can't hear you come out and face

me like a man

one of these two maniacs is gonna get us

killed

the back isn't being covered right now I

think we can get out

The ammo! Is there another...

If you put out the fire you can still

take the money and drugs

we made an island didn't we?

Yeah val yeah we did

you were my charm

Hostages if you are able

come out the door with your hands up

Are you boys the last ones left? Yeah

it's just us

everyone else is dead. That's the best

possible outcome

I'll get on the horn and call in the

meat wagon in the fire brigade

You boys...

What did you just do

the worst thing I ever did

Danny iucifer

what the fuck happened to my house

Fresh as a Daisy

what the fuck happened to my house

it's Chanel aren't you a peach

daddyissues

sex ed final

the r word Kenny

improvised explosive devices

baby daddy

show's over

Did you guys hear about the gang of

girls that robbed this strip club

like nobody knows who they are there's

like this army of girls I heard there

was like 10 of them

10 or so just like a random army of

girls they killed a bunch of sleazy

dudes

like some sleazy straight guys

of course the idiot cops they have

absolutely

positively no leads I hope they get away

with it I hope they get away with it I

hope they knock over

every strip club in the country office

Brandy Alice strip clubs and amulet

neither

this is the revolution and I'm here for

Let's get physical let me hear your body

Bartender three fiver rats

for these pussy cats