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1
00:02:55,958 --> 00:02:58,700
"Some kind of happiness."
2
00:02:58,743 --> 00:03:01,790
H-a-p-p-i-- good, one "n."
3
00:03:01,833 --> 00:03:04,140
"Honey whitlock."
4
00:03:04,184 --> 00:03:06,969
W-h-i-t-- good, good.
5
00:03:07,012 --> 00:03:09,232
That's good.
6
00:03:09,276 --> 00:03:12,235
Try moving a little more
to the right, sinclair.
7
00:03:12,279 --> 00:03:14,237
Is that better,
Mr. Stillings ?
8
00:03:14,281 --> 00:03:16,848
Yeah. Yeah,
that's all right.
9
00:03:16,892 --> 00:03:20,504
But try moving the "n"
a little more to the right.
10
00:03:20,548 --> 00:03:22,811
Hmm.
11
00:03:22,854 --> 00:03:25,422
- Have you met
miss whitlock yet ?
- Not till tonight.
12
00:03:25,466 --> 00:03:28,164
But don't worry, sinclair.
I'll introduce you.
13
00:03:28,208 --> 00:03:31,863
You promise ?
I'd kill to meet her.
14
00:03:31,907 --> 00:03:35,215
[ People chattering, whistle blows ]
15
00:03:35,258 --> 00:03:39,654
Ohh, what a town.
[ Laughs ]
16
00:03:39,697 --> 00:03:43,048
You know, I tell
everybody in Hollywood...
17
00:03:43,092 --> 00:03:46,051
That if you want to shoot on location in Baltimore,
18
00:03:46,095 --> 00:03:49,316
you really don't need to bring
a crew from Los Angeles.
19
00:03:49,359 --> 00:03:53,972
Because Baltimore really is best.
20
00:03:54,016 --> 00:03:57,454
And remember, miss whitlock...
21
00:03:57,498 --> 00:04:00,283
Is every inch a movie star,
22
00:04:00,327 --> 00:04:05,114
and she expects to be onstage at 7:10 P.M. exactly...
23
00:04:05,157 --> 00:04:08,291
In order to ensure live coverage...
24
00:04:08,335 --> 00:04:11,251
From each of the three local news shows.
25
00:04:11,294 --> 00:04:14,166
Oh, by the way,
26
00:04:14,210 --> 00:04:18,910
I hear she's really a nice person.
27
00:04:20,564 --> 00:04:23,611
[ Siren wailing ]
28
00:04:23,654 --> 00:04:26,353
Look at this dump of a town.
29
00:04:26,396 --> 00:04:29,660
Get me the fuck back to L.A.
30
00:04:29,704 --> 00:04:34,317
God, if one more asshole
mentions a crab cake to me,
I think I'm gonna puke.
31
00:04:34,361 --> 00:04:36,798
Well, did you try
the steamed crabs ?
32
00:04:36,841 --> 00:04:40,062
They're red
and really tasty.No, I did not.
33
00:04:40,105 --> 00:04:43,761
I'm not interested in any kind
of meal that you have to beat
with a fucking mallet,
34
00:04:43,805 --> 00:04:46,286
wearing some stupid
kind of little bib.
35
00:04:46,329 --> 00:04:49,289
[ Knock at door ]Just a minute !
36
00:04:49,332 --> 00:04:52,553
While families of mutants
gawk in my face.
37
00:04:52,596 --> 00:04:54,337
No, thank you.
38
00:04:55,686 --> 00:04:57,122
Hi.
39
00:04:59,211 --> 00:05:04,478
Your limousine
is here, miss whitlock.
You look beautiful.
40
00:05:04,521 --> 00:05:08,351
Well, thank you,
Charles, darling.
I'm so excited.
41
00:05:08,395 --> 00:05:10,179
We'll be right with you.
42
00:05:16,359 --> 00:05:20,711
Libby, do you think
that pat Nixon got fucked
in this hotel room ?
43
00:05:20,755 --> 00:05:22,452
What ?
44
00:05:22,496 --> 00:05:25,063
It is called
the presidential suite,
isn't it ?
45
00:05:25,107 --> 00:05:28,240
Yes, but--
46
00:05:28,284 --> 00:05:31,853
I bet she did.
Call the manager and ask him.
47
00:05:31,896 --> 00:05:35,030
I can't ask that.
48
00:05:35,073 --> 00:05:37,380
Pat Nixon
was a stroke victim.
49
00:05:37,424 --> 00:05:40,775
I believe it is your job
to ask, is it not ?
50
00:05:40,818 --> 00:05:44,126
Now, call downstairs
and ask the manager...
51
00:05:44,169 --> 00:05:47,782
If pat Nixon got fucked
in my hotel room.
52
00:05:47,825 --> 00:05:50,132
I want to know.
53
00:05:50,175 --> 00:05:52,352
Yes, miss whitlock.
54
00:05:54,005 --> 00:05:56,617
[ Chattering ]
55
00:05:56,660 --> 00:06:00,751
6:41 P.M.
56
00:06:00,795 --> 00:06:02,971
A star is born.
57
00:06:03,014 --> 00:06:05,190
Ten-four, petie.
58
00:06:07,279 --> 00:06:11,327
Christ, Lyle. Look !
There's what's-her-name
from e! Network.
59
00:06:11,371 --> 00:06:14,069
[ Chuckles ]
Would you look
at the tits on her !
60
00:06:14,112 --> 00:06:16,114
[ Grunts ]
61
00:06:18,421 --> 00:06:20,858
6:43 P.M.
62
00:06:20,902 --> 00:06:24,514
♪♪ [ Piano ]
63
00:06:24,558 --> 00:06:28,039
The hotel manager said no.
Pat Nixon never stayed here.
64
00:06:28,083 --> 00:06:31,956
But Nancy Reagan did
in 1986.You actually asked him ?
65
00:06:32,000 --> 00:06:34,611
Y-You said
to call downstairs.
66
00:06:34,655 --> 00:06:39,442
You asked the hotel manager if
pat Nixon had sex in my room ?
67
00:06:39,486 --> 00:06:42,445
Well, sort of. I-I thought
you needed to know.
68
00:06:42,489 --> 00:06:44,926
I was kidding, Libby !
69
00:06:44,969 --> 00:06:49,060
He must think you're
a complete lunatic.
70
00:06:49,104 --> 00:06:52,673
[ Sighs ]
Good god, you
would do anything.
71
00:06:52,716 --> 00:06:55,153
[ Sighs ]
72
00:06:55,197 --> 00:06:57,373
Good luck, miss whitlock.
73
00:06:57,417 --> 00:06:59,462
[ Elevator bell dings ]
74
00:07:01,856 --> 00:07:06,208
Excuse me.
Did you hear what that
little bitch just said to me ?
75
00:07:06,251 --> 00:07:08,602
- She didn't know.
- In show business,
76
00:07:08,645 --> 00:07:12,040
we say "break a leg,"
never fucking "good luck" !
77
00:07:12,083 --> 00:07:15,826
That's just an old superstition.Ms. Whitlock, there's photo ops
with the mayor in the lobby.
78
00:07:15,870 --> 00:07:19,482
You know,
that little cocksucker just put
a curse on my goddamn premiere.
79
00:07:19,526 --> 00:07:21,876
[ Bell dings ]
80
00:07:21,919 --> 00:07:24,618
Is every person
in the world an asshole ?
81
00:07:24,661 --> 00:07:27,359
6:42.oh, that's nice.
82
00:07:27,403 --> 00:07:30,319
♪♪ [ Hard rock ]
83
00:07:35,759 --> 00:07:39,633
6:44 P.M.
by whatever means necessary.
84
00:07:39,676 --> 00:07:41,852
Two popcorns, please.Butter or plain ?
85
00:07:41,896 --> 00:07:43,898
[ Woman ] Honey whitlock !
86
00:07:43,941 --> 00:07:47,379
There she is.
You better get a shot.
87
00:07:47,423 --> 00:07:49,686
Over there !miss whitlock, what an honor.
88
00:07:49,730 --> 00:07:52,863
Mayor fenwick !
89
00:07:52,907 --> 00:07:55,910
[ Laughter, chattering ]
90
00:07:59,827 --> 00:08:04,092
6:46 P.M. in the name
of underground cinema.
91
00:08:04,135 --> 00:08:07,878
I have to tell you
that I just love what you've
done with the city.
92
00:08:07,922 --> 00:08:11,752
And Baltimore
loves you back.
[ Laughs ]
93
00:08:13,405 --> 00:08:17,801
I, Adam fenwick, mayor
of the city of Baltimore,
94
00:08:17,845 --> 00:08:20,630
do hereby proclaim
October 29...
95
00:08:20,674 --> 00:08:23,241
To be honey whitlock day
in Baltimore...
96
00:08:23,285 --> 00:08:26,636
And do command this observation
to all of our citizens.
97
00:08:26,680 --> 00:08:28,812
Whereas--
98
00:08:35,123 --> 00:08:37,517
6:47 P.M.
99
00:08:37,560 --> 00:08:41,172
Hey, hey, m.P.A.A., how many
movies did you censor today ?
100
00:08:45,437 --> 00:08:47,178
[ Sighs ][ Sighs ]
101
00:08:49,441 --> 00:08:51,835
What's the matter,
miss whitlock ?
102
00:08:51,879 --> 00:08:54,142
A white fucking limousine !
103
00:08:55,709 --> 00:08:58,059
Nobody'll know.
We're in Baltimore.
104
00:08:58,102 --> 00:09:02,411
Do I look like liberace's
goddamn boyfriend,
for Christ's sake ?
105
00:09:02,454 --> 00:09:06,763
I have "black limousine
only" in my contract.
106
00:09:06,807 --> 00:09:10,245
The charity probably
made the arrangements.
It was an honest mistake.
107
00:09:10,288 --> 00:09:13,465
Do I look like
a coke dealer ?no, miss whitlock.
108
00:09:13,509 --> 00:09:16,381
Do I look like I am going
to the fucking prom ?
109
00:09:16,425 --> 00:09:19,994
Break a leg,
miss whitlock.
110
00:09:20,037 --> 00:09:21,996
Here you go, sir.
111
00:09:24,955 --> 00:09:27,523
[ Engine starts ]
112
00:09:27,567 --> 00:09:31,832
Uh, miss whitlock,
security's gonna have my ass
if we're late. We gotta go.
113
00:09:31,875 --> 00:09:34,965
Do not say "ass" to me,
trailer trash.
114
00:09:35,009 --> 00:09:38,186
I will have you fired.
115
00:09:38,229 --> 00:09:41,232
[ Chattering ]
116
00:09:44,496 --> 00:09:46,934
Now, you're with the studio,
is that correct ?
117
00:09:46,977 --> 00:09:50,546
Yes. Oh, oh, I'm sorry.
Let me get that for you.
118
00:09:50,590 --> 00:09:54,289
Got it right here.
Yeah. Here you go.
119
00:09:54,332 --> 00:09:58,075
I'm so sorry. Here,
these first two right there.
Okay, enjoy the show.
120
00:09:58,119 --> 00:10:01,731
Yeah, 6:48 P.M. an Usher's
job is never done.
121
00:10:01,775 --> 00:10:04,691
Put down the flashlight,
pick up the gun.
122
00:10:21,011 --> 00:10:26,190
Some kind of happiness
is, you know, a screwball
romantic comedy.
123
00:10:26,234 --> 00:10:30,891
It's life-affirming but realistic, and, well, to be honest,
124
00:10:30,934 --> 00:10:33,981
with all the misery that
goes on in the world today,
125
00:10:34,024 --> 00:10:36,636
couldn't we use a little
optimism in the movies ?
126
00:10:36,679 --> 00:10:39,421
[ Chattering continues ]
127
00:10:48,386 --> 00:10:52,173
6:50 P.M.
fuck the studio system !
128
00:10:52,216 --> 00:10:54,262
Tickets, please.
129
00:10:58,788 --> 00:11:02,226
The heart fund's
a wonderful cause.
Thanks for your support.
130
00:11:02,270 --> 00:11:04,228
You're welcome.
131
00:11:04,272 --> 00:11:08,537
7:01 P.M.
inch by motherfucking inch.
132
00:11:08,580 --> 00:11:10,757
Yes, sir ?two for henman.
133
00:11:10,800 --> 00:11:14,151
Why don't you just
sit right there ?
134
00:11:19,722 --> 00:11:21,855
[ Beeping ]
135
00:11:26,120 --> 00:11:28,339
7:02 P.M.
136
00:11:28,383 --> 00:11:31,691
When the word is given,
we will seize the cinema.
137
00:11:33,127 --> 00:11:36,217
[ Crowd shouting, cheering ]
138
00:11:36,260 --> 00:11:39,263
Hey, come back !
Give me an autograph !
139
00:11:42,527 --> 00:11:45,008
7:06 P.M.
the big snatch.
140
00:11:45,052 --> 00:11:47,750
Good evening, miss whitlock,
141
00:11:47,794 --> 00:11:50,405
and welcome to the historic
senator theater.
142
00:11:50,448 --> 00:11:52,407
Thank you.
143
00:11:52,450 --> 00:11:54,278
[ Cheering continues ]
144
00:12:07,944 --> 00:12:10,294
Enjoy the show.Thank you.
145
00:12:10,338 --> 00:12:13,341
Good evening.
I'm Sylvia Mallory,
146
00:12:13,384 --> 00:12:15,517
the chairman of the
Baltimore heart fund,
147
00:12:15,560 --> 00:12:18,041
and this is William.
148
00:12:18,085 --> 00:12:20,217
He's so cute.
149
00:12:23,873 --> 00:12:28,051
William had heart surgery
just seven days ago.
150
00:12:28,095 --> 00:12:32,099
And thanks to the blood
transfusions paid for
by your generosity...
151
00:12:32,142 --> 00:12:35,711
At tonight's premiere,
he's going to be all right.
152
00:12:35,755 --> 00:12:37,713
Aren't you, William ?
153
00:12:37,757 --> 00:12:39,976
I don't wanna be here !
154
00:12:40,020 --> 00:12:42,457
William's a little grumpy.
155
00:12:42,500 --> 00:12:44,372
Get off of me, ugly !
156
00:12:44,415 --> 00:12:46,809
But he's alive,
and that's what counts.
157
00:12:46,853 --> 00:12:50,944
[ Chattering ]
158
00:12:50,987 --> 00:12:53,424
Miss whitlock ! Miss whitlock !
159
00:12:53,468 --> 00:12:56,645
Miss whitlock, please ! [ Shouting continues ]
160
00:12:56,688 --> 00:12:58,908
What ?
161
00:12:58,952 --> 00:13:01,345
Channel 45 here. Can I ask you a couple questions ?
162
00:13:05,219 --> 00:13:08,526
And now for the moment
you've all been waiting for.
163
00:13:08,570 --> 00:13:11,312
You first saw honey whitlock
on the screen--
164
00:13:11,355 --> 00:13:13,836
you guys have
reserved seats.Thank you.
165
00:13:13,880 --> 00:13:16,621
[ Mallory continues, indistinct ]
166
00:13:23,454 --> 00:13:27,589
7:09 P.M. honey whitlock,
welcome to film hell.
167
00:13:27,632 --> 00:13:30,113
[ Applause ]
168
00:13:30,157 --> 00:13:34,988
[ Mallory ] And from then on, hit after hit.7:09 P.M. and 30 seconds.
169
00:13:35,031 --> 00:13:38,469
The big hurt.Watch it, you little fucker !
170
00:13:40,123 --> 00:13:43,910
Her Oscar-nominated performance
in forced entry.
171
00:13:43,953 --> 00:13:48,392
[ Applause ]And tonight, some kind of happiness.
172
00:13:48,436 --> 00:13:50,438
[ Applause ]
173
00:13:50,481 --> 00:13:52,744
And now,
ladies and gentlemen,
174
00:13:52,788 --> 00:13:56,836
a big Baltimore welcome
for miss honey whitlock.
175
00:13:56,879 --> 00:13:59,839
♪♪ [ Fanfare ]
176
00:14:33,481 --> 00:14:36,266
Thank you, thank you.
You're so kind.
177
00:14:36,310 --> 00:14:41,271
Um, I just wanted to say
that I hope you enjoy
the movie, and I just--
178
00:14:41,315 --> 00:14:44,013
[ boy gasping ]I love you, Baltimore.
I really do.
179
00:14:45,972 --> 00:14:50,367
I am Cecil b. Demented, and
this is a fucking kidnapping !
180
00:14:50,411 --> 00:14:52,848
[ Crowd gasping, screaming ]
181
00:14:52,892 --> 00:14:55,068
Get down, everybody !
182
00:14:56,983 --> 00:14:59,768
[ Screaming continues ]
183
00:15:01,161 --> 00:15:03,119
♪♪ [ Hard rock continues ]
184
00:15:07,994 --> 00:15:10,300
[ Gasping ]
Son of a bitch !
185
00:15:15,349 --> 00:15:18,047
- Keep moving !
- [ Groaning ]
186
00:15:19,919 --> 00:15:22,138
[ Gasping continues ]
187
00:15:26,926 --> 00:15:29,929
[ Gunshots ] [ Screaming continues ]
188
00:15:29,972 --> 00:15:32,409
[ Groaning continues ]
189
00:15:32,453 --> 00:15:36,370
[ Laughing ]
190
00:15:36,413 --> 00:15:38,981
Help ! Hey ![ Coughing ]
191
00:15:39,025 --> 00:15:41,766
[ Grunts ]
192
00:15:41,810 --> 00:15:44,465
Women in film !all right, sister !
193
00:15:44,508 --> 00:15:48,730
Hey, she's got
photo approval ![ Woman grunts ]
194
00:15:48,773 --> 00:15:52,342
[ Screaming]
Honey ! Honey !
195
00:15:52,386 --> 00:15:54,692
Help me !get out !
Premiere's over !
196
00:15:54,736 --> 00:15:56,607
Come on, you guys !
Come on, come on !
197
00:16:03,223 --> 00:16:06,922
Yeah ! Yeah !
198
00:16:11,057 --> 00:16:13,450
Drop your weapon !
[ Grunts ]
199
00:16:13,494 --> 00:16:16,192
[ Gunshots, screaming
continue ]
200
00:16:18,499 --> 00:16:20,501
Get down !
201
00:16:20,544 --> 00:16:23,504
Help ! Call the studio !
Call Jack valenti !
202
00:16:23,547 --> 00:16:26,507
Help me, somebody !get in the trunk !
203
00:16:26,550 --> 00:16:29,466
Shut up !
Get in there !no ! No ! No !
204
00:16:29,510 --> 00:16:32,295
Get in there !oh, shit ! Oh ! No !
205
00:16:32,339 --> 00:16:35,081
Get in there ! Rodney, come on ! Let's go !
206
00:16:35,124 --> 00:16:39,346
Power to the people
who punish bad cinema !
207
00:16:39,389 --> 00:16:41,609
[ Honey ] Help !
208
00:16:41,652 --> 00:16:44,220
♪ Bankable bitch we don't need no pitch ♪
209
00:16:44,264 --> 00:16:47,049
♪ bankable bitch we don't need no pitch ♪
210
00:16:47,093 --> 00:16:49,051
♪ I'm sorry, shorty
it's business ♪
211
00:16:49,095 --> 00:16:51,532
♪ 'cause this is how we live this
this business is hard ♪
212
00:16:51,575 --> 00:16:53,621
♪ without a star, kid yeah, you all that ♪
213
00:16:53,664 --> 00:16:55,797
♪ but you won't be receiving no callbacks ♪
214
00:16:55,840 --> 00:16:57,799
♪ or getting money in tall stacks ♪
215
00:16:57,842 --> 00:16:59,931
♪ we gotcha, and we gonna use your face proper ♪
216
00:16:59,975 --> 00:17:02,064
♪ bitch, you can forget about an Oscar ♪
217
00:17:02,108 --> 00:17:04,066
♪ and shrimp and lobster
218
00:17:04,110 --> 00:17:06,068
♪ hopin' we could get ya
219
00:17:06,112 --> 00:17:09,071
♪ to come here and open our picture ♪
220
00:17:09,115 --> 00:17:12,335
♪ you all alone with the cine-niggas
fuck the private trailer ♪
221
00:17:12,379 --> 00:17:15,382
♪ dance lessons with Irene Cara, it's flagrant
we using your name trick ♪
222
00:17:15,425 --> 00:17:17,601
♪ discuss gross points with your agent ♪
223
00:17:17,645 --> 00:17:19,516
♪ 'cause from us you ain't gettin' shit ♪
224
00:17:19,560 --> 00:17:21,823
♪ bankable bitch we don't need no pitch ♪
225
00:17:21,866 --> 00:17:24,217
♪ bankable bitch we don't need no pitch ♪
226
00:17:24,260 --> 00:17:26,610
♪ she's a bankable bitch
we don't need no pitch ♪
227
00:17:26,654 --> 00:17:29,265
♪ she's a bankable bitch we don't need no pitch ♪
228
00:17:29,309 --> 00:17:32,486
♪ she's a bankable bitch we don't need no pitch ♪♪[ Muffled cries ]
229
00:17:32,529 --> 00:17:35,141
[ Whining continues ]
230
00:17:46,152 --> 00:17:48,241
Hello, miss whitlock.
231
00:17:53,985 --> 00:17:57,076
I am Cecil b. Demented,
and I'm your new director.
232
00:17:57,119 --> 00:18:00,427
[ Whining ]I'd like you to meet
your co-stars.
233
00:18:00,470 --> 00:18:03,082
I call them
the sprocket holes.
This is Cherish.
234
00:18:04,909 --> 00:18:08,522
Hi. I played you
in lots of porno movies.
235
00:18:08,565 --> 00:18:12,221
Some kind of happiness--
I've already shot it,
236
00:18:12,265 --> 00:18:14,658
only it's called
some kind of horniness.
237
00:18:14,702 --> 00:18:19,576
That's all behind me. I'm an outlaw cinema girl now.
238
00:18:19,620 --> 00:18:22,318
- Lyle.
- Hi. I'm Lyle.
239
00:18:24,364 --> 00:18:27,106
I'm your leading man.
240
00:18:29,195 --> 00:18:32,937
I've had a boner for you
for years.
241
00:18:32,981 --> 00:18:37,594
Don't worry. We've all taken a vow of celibacy for celluloid.
242
00:18:37,638 --> 00:18:40,467
No one gets laid
until we've finished our movie.
243
00:18:40,510 --> 00:18:44,732
- We're horny...
- [ All moaning ]
244
00:18:44,775 --> 00:18:47,256
But our film comes first.
245
00:18:47,300 --> 00:18:49,345
And now for the crew.
246
00:18:52,305 --> 00:18:54,872
I'm Pam.
247
00:18:56,570 --> 00:18:59,703
I'm director of photography,
and you better hit your Mark.
248
00:19:03,968 --> 00:19:07,276
And remember,
speak up, bitch !
249
00:19:07,320 --> 00:19:09,409
I'm chardonnay,
and I do the sound.
250
00:19:14,414 --> 00:19:16,720
[ Gasps ]
251
00:19:16,764 --> 00:19:20,333
I'm Lewis, the art director,
and I hope you dig it here.
252
00:19:22,073 --> 00:19:25,033
- [ Clicks ]
- 'Cause you ain't goin'
nowhere else.
253
00:19:26,426 --> 00:19:30,212
I'm fidget, the costumer.
254
00:19:30,256 --> 00:19:34,129
[ Screams ]Sorry. I gotta
give you a new look.
255
00:19:35,826 --> 00:19:38,481
Hi.
256
00:19:38,525 --> 00:19:41,528
I'm raven. I'm a satanist,
and I'll be doing your makeup.
257
00:19:41,571 --> 00:19:45,227
Oh, my god,
you look so pale.
258
00:19:46,750 --> 00:19:49,100
[ Grunts ]
Sorry...
259
00:19:49,144 --> 00:19:51,842
But Satan says
you need more color.
260
00:19:53,670 --> 00:19:56,630
Call me Rodney.
261
00:19:56,673 --> 00:20:00,242
Tomorrow, I'm bleaching
your hair out platinum.
262
00:20:00,286 --> 00:20:02,462
[ Groaning ] And I should warn you.
263
00:20:02,505 --> 00:20:04,812
I hate fucking roots !
264
00:20:06,553 --> 00:20:09,991
Hey, remember me ? I'm petie. I'll be your driver.
265
00:20:10,034 --> 00:20:13,124
♪♪ [ Indistinct ]I'll take you anywhere.
266
00:20:13,168 --> 00:20:17,694
Anywhere but home.
[ Chuckles ]
267
00:20:24,658 --> 00:20:26,399
I'm dinah,
Cecil's producer.
268
00:20:28,531 --> 00:20:30,838
And I do everything.
269
00:20:30,881 --> 00:20:33,623
I've been knocking down money
from every big Hollywood hit...
270
00:20:33,667 --> 00:20:36,191
For years just to pay
for this equipment !
271
00:20:36,235 --> 00:20:39,150
So fuck with me, sister,
and you're dead !
272
00:20:42,328 --> 00:20:44,939
We made the news.
273
00:20:46,549 --> 00:20:49,291
So once again, our top story:
Sylvia Mallory,
274
00:20:49,335 --> 00:20:51,946
the 52-year-old chairwoman of the Baltimore heart fund,
275
00:20:51,989 --> 00:20:55,254
died tonight
at union memorial hospital...
276
00:20:55,297 --> 00:20:57,778
Following an onstage heart attack she suffered...
277
00:20:57,821 --> 00:21:01,347
In the middle of honey whitlock's kidnapping at tonight's movie premiere.
278
00:21:01,390 --> 00:21:04,219
The teenage gang
of cinema terrorists...
279
00:21:04,263 --> 00:21:07,527
Who apparently
infiltrated the staff
of the senator theater...
280
00:21:07,570 --> 00:21:10,617
Are now eligible
for the death penalty
in the state of Maryland.
281
00:21:10,660 --> 00:21:13,054
- [ Gasping ]
- None of them have been
apprehended.
282
00:21:15,317 --> 00:21:19,408
We're gonna make our
first film, miss whitlock,
and nobody's gonna stop us.
283
00:21:19,452 --> 00:21:22,324
Lots of kids dream
of making a movie,
284
00:21:22,368 --> 00:21:25,545
but only the ones willing
to die for it succeed.
285
00:21:25,588 --> 00:21:28,548
[ Whimpering ]
286
00:21:30,376 --> 00:21:33,161
♪♪ [ Hard rock ]
287
00:21:35,381 --> 00:21:38,340
[ Glass shattering ]
288
00:21:38,384 --> 00:21:42,475
Ow ! Ow ! Ow !
Ow ! Ow !
289
00:21:42,518 --> 00:21:44,607
I don't wanna be blonde !
290
00:21:44,651 --> 00:21:47,610
You're going off the deep end
of the clairol color chart.
291
00:21:47,654 --> 00:21:50,134
Ow ! It is burning
my scalp !
292
00:21:50,178 --> 00:21:53,834
Hey, beauty
comes from agony.
293
00:21:53,877 --> 00:21:55,879
Everybody knows that.
294
00:21:55,923 --> 00:22:00,754
I haven't had this much fun
since my last livestock
mutilation.
295
00:22:00,797 --> 00:22:03,713
Ouch !
That really hurts !
296
00:22:03,757 --> 00:22:07,978
In the house of pain,
there are 10,000 shrines.
297
00:22:08,022 --> 00:22:10,372
Allistair crowley said that.
298
00:22:10,416 --> 00:22:12,635
Let's wash her out.
299
00:22:12,679 --> 00:22:16,726
No, no. Please let me go.
I won't tell anybody
about your little movie.
300
00:22:16,770 --> 00:22:19,076
Little ?[ Whip cracks ]
301
00:22:20,991 --> 00:22:25,561
Well, I didn't mean little.
I meant, like, low budget,
like cult.
302
00:22:25,605 --> 00:22:28,695
Good morning,
miss whitlock.
Know your lines ?
303
00:22:28,738 --> 00:22:30,914
Please, Mr. Demento--
is that correct ?
304
00:22:30,958 --> 00:22:33,221
Demented !
305
00:22:33,264 --> 00:22:36,398
You have the wrong star
for this movie.
306
00:22:36,442 --> 00:22:40,359
Nonsense, miss whitlock.
I wrote the part
just for you.
307
00:22:40,402 --> 00:22:43,405
[ Helicopter approaching ]And the whole world
is watching.
308
00:22:43,449 --> 00:22:46,190
Not even your agent
can help you now.
309
00:22:46,234 --> 00:22:49,280
Finish her hair !
310
00:22:49,324 --> 00:22:52,588
Ow ! Ow, ow !
It's burning my scalp !
311
00:22:52,632 --> 00:22:54,982
Ow ! Shit !shut up !
312
00:22:55,025 --> 00:22:59,247
I hate these fucking things.
Damn security devices !
313
00:22:59,290 --> 00:23:02,032
Fidget, fidget,
my little genius fidget.
314
00:23:02,076 --> 00:23:05,427
- Ow !
- Please take off your clothes.
315
00:23:05,471 --> 00:23:07,777
What ?
316
00:23:07,821 --> 00:23:10,214
[ Fidget over speaker ]
I said take off your clothes.
317
00:23:10,258 --> 00:23:14,218
You heard me. Don't be a prude.
318
00:23:14,262 --> 00:23:17,091
Come on, strip !oh, shit.
319
00:23:17,134 --> 00:23:20,268
Yeah, yeah, take 'em off.
320
00:23:20,311 --> 00:23:24,446
[ All moaning ]
321
00:23:24,490 --> 00:23:27,231
Um...
322
00:23:27,275 --> 00:23:30,757
Do I have a dressing room
or a trailer ?
323
00:23:30,800 --> 00:23:34,369
Miss whitlock,
we're on a schedule.
324
00:23:34,413 --> 00:23:38,286
[ Moaning continues ]
325
00:23:42,333 --> 00:23:45,467
They're not allowed
any form of sexual release.
326
00:23:45,511 --> 00:23:49,471
Screen actors guild
is gonna hear about this,
and I mean it. God !
327
00:23:49,515 --> 00:23:52,474
[ Moaning, muttering ]
328
00:23:52,518 --> 00:23:55,782
Look at that ass ! Goddamn !
329
00:23:55,825 --> 00:23:58,001
Nice vessel.
330
00:24:00,134 --> 00:24:03,354
- I see London.
- I see France.
331
00:24:03,398 --> 00:24:05,531
[ Lewis ] I see honey's underpants.
332
00:24:05,574 --> 00:24:08,272
[ Sighs ]
333
00:24:10,318 --> 00:24:13,190
Oh, my god !
I look terrible !
334
00:24:17,238 --> 00:24:20,894
All right ! All right !
You're wanted on set.
335
00:24:20,937 --> 00:24:22,896
[ Screams ]
336
00:24:24,550 --> 00:24:26,987
This is sprocket house,
miss whitlock.
337
00:24:27,030 --> 00:24:29,772
Think of it as your studio.
338
00:24:29,816 --> 00:24:32,122
Morning.
339
00:24:32,166 --> 00:24:34,734
Can't you even say
good morning to Lewis ?
340
00:24:34,777 --> 00:24:37,476
He's worked
very hard on this set
with a budget of zero.
341
00:24:37,519 --> 00:24:40,348
Morning.all these materials...
342
00:24:40,391 --> 00:24:43,960
Were stolen
from city-owned construction
sites, just for you.
343
00:24:44,004 --> 00:24:46,963
See, we gonna have us
a hit, miss whitlock.
344
00:24:47,007 --> 00:24:49,879
Now, our picture
is called raving beauty.
345
00:24:49,923 --> 00:24:52,578
You play the insane owner
of a failed art theater...
346
00:24:52,621 --> 00:24:54,841
Who, along with her film
fanatic boyfriend Lyle--
347
00:24:54,884 --> 00:24:56,799
Lyle, come on over.
348
00:24:56,843 --> 00:25:00,063
And her violence-prone
daughter Cherish--
349
00:25:00,107 --> 00:25:02,065
daughter ?
350
00:25:02,109 --> 00:25:05,199
Together,
the three of you vow...
351
00:25:05,242 --> 00:25:08,811
To start a revolution
to destroy mainstream cinema.
352
00:25:09,943 --> 00:25:12,467
I can't be in this movie.
353
00:25:12,511 --> 00:25:15,644
You dare to tell
Cecil b. Demented
you refuse ?
354
00:25:15,688 --> 00:25:19,343
- I am too young
to play her mother.
- [ Smirks ]
355
00:25:19,387 --> 00:25:21,520
I know how old you are.
356
00:25:23,086 --> 00:25:25,393
All right, well,
I just don't feel it.
357
00:25:25,436 --> 00:25:28,527
I just am not motivated.How's this
for motivation, huh ?
358
00:25:28,570 --> 00:25:30,746
[ Zapping ]Ow !
359
00:25:30,790 --> 00:25:33,749
There are no
creative differences on
a Cecil b. Demented set.
360
00:25:33,793 --> 00:25:36,056
You got that ?
361
00:25:36,099 --> 00:25:39,363
One day you'll thank me
for saving you from your
bad career. Places !
362
00:25:39,407 --> 00:25:42,366
All right,
walk-through rehearsal.
363
00:25:42,410 --> 00:25:44,978
Come on, you heard him.
This ain't Hollywood.
364
00:25:45,021 --> 00:25:47,502
Hey, honey,
you want some ecstasy ?
365
00:25:47,546 --> 00:25:50,244
No.
366
00:25:50,287 --> 00:25:55,075
[ Clears throat ]
And... action.
367
00:25:56,642 --> 00:25:59,253
Hey, Cherish, it's 8:00.
368
00:25:59,296 --> 00:26:01,560
Is it time to get this show
on the screen or what ?
369
00:26:01,603 --> 00:26:04,737
We didn't sell
one ticket, Lyle.
Nobody came.
370
00:26:04,780 --> 00:26:08,218
What ? Pasolini's playing,
and we have an empty theater ?
371
00:26:12,309 --> 00:26:15,704
[ Reading in monotone ]
"It's that fucking new multiplex
that opened in the mall."
372
00:26:15,748 --> 00:26:18,664
I heard they were sold out
last night, mom.
373
00:26:18,707 --> 00:26:22,102
No, not for the flintstones
sequel !
374
00:26:22,145 --> 00:26:25,235
"Somebody's got to pay
for this insult."
375
00:26:25,279 --> 00:26:28,587
Oh, god !
[ Groaning ]
376
00:26:28,630 --> 00:26:31,590
[ Thudding continues ]
377
00:26:31,633 --> 00:26:36,856
"From the empty seats
of every good movie theater
in america...
378
00:26:36,899 --> 00:26:39,293
[ Stapler clicking ]
379
00:26:39,336 --> 00:26:42,296
[ Gagging ] "We will rise up to take back the screen.
380
00:26:42,339 --> 00:26:47,301
- [ Gagging continues ]
- [ Groaning ]
381
00:26:47,344 --> 00:26:51,566
- Death to those who support
mainstream cinema."
- [ Yelps ]
382
00:26:51,610 --> 00:26:55,439
Do you see the pain your
performance is causing me, huh !
383
00:26:55,483 --> 00:26:58,834
Okay, yes, I do.
Fine, I'll do it.
384
00:26:58,878 --> 00:27:01,228
Okay ?
Let's just shoot it. Fine !
385
00:27:01,271 --> 00:27:05,188
All right, places ! Pam !
386
00:27:05,232 --> 00:27:09,410
Picture's up !
Camera rolling !
387
00:27:09,453 --> 00:27:11,630
Speed.mark it !
388
00:27:11,673 --> 00:27:13,849
[ Cecil ] And... action !
389
00:27:13,893 --> 00:27:17,113
Hey, Cherish, it's 8:00.
390
00:27:17,157 --> 00:27:19,420
Is it time to get this show
on the screen or what ?
391
00:27:19,463 --> 00:27:22,379
We didn't sell one ticket, Lyle.
Nobody came.
392
00:27:22,423 --> 00:27:25,992
[ Lyle ] What ? Pasolini's playing, and we have an empty theater ?
393
00:27:26,035 --> 00:27:30,605
It's that fucking new
multiplex that opened
in the mall, isn't it ?
394
00:27:30,649 --> 00:27:33,477
[ Cherish ] I heard they were sold out last night, mom.
395
00:27:33,521 --> 00:27:35,784
No, not for the flintstones
sequel.
396
00:27:35,828 --> 00:27:39,048
Somebody's gotta pay
for this insult.
397
00:27:39,092 --> 00:27:42,486
From the empty seats of every good movie theater in america...
398
00:27:42,530 --> 00:27:45,925
We will rise up
to take back the screen.
399
00:27:45,968 --> 00:27:49,363
Death to those who support
mainstream cinema !
400
00:27:49,406 --> 00:27:51,757
Cut ! And print it !
401
00:27:51,800 --> 00:27:53,889
[ Cheering ]
402
00:27:53,933 --> 00:27:56,587
That's more like it,
miss whitlock.
403
00:27:56,631 --> 00:27:59,765
- [ Cheering continues ]
- Yeah ! Yeah !
404
00:27:59,808 --> 00:28:03,246
But, you know,
to be frank, Cecil--
405
00:28:03,290 --> 00:28:07,120
I mean, in my real
film life, I would never
make this movie.
406
00:28:07,163 --> 00:28:09,905
I mean, the message
is absolutely ridiculous.
407
00:28:09,949 --> 00:28:12,865
Ask theater owners
in any country,
408
00:28:12,908 --> 00:28:16,346
and they will tell you
that Hollywood makes
the best films in the world,
409
00:28:16,390 --> 00:28:18,479
and I am proud to be
a part of that system.
410
00:28:18,522 --> 00:28:20,437
Let's move on.
411
00:28:22,352 --> 00:28:24,224
Well, wait a minute.
No coverage ?
412
00:28:26,182 --> 00:28:28,445
The first take
is the only real truth.
413
00:28:28,489 --> 00:28:31,666
But you can't cut a film
with just a master.
414
00:28:31,710 --> 00:28:35,975
There are no rules
in outlaw cinema, miss whitlock.
Only edges.
415
00:28:36,018 --> 00:28:39,587
We believe technique to be
nothing more than failed style.
416
00:28:39,630 --> 00:28:42,242
You see,
I've had a vision.
417
00:28:45,462 --> 00:28:48,074
And that vision is called
ultimate reality !
418
00:28:48,117 --> 00:28:52,992
The rest of our film is shot
in real life with real people...
419
00:28:53,035 --> 00:28:55,559
And, yes, with real terror.
420
00:29:07,006 --> 00:29:09,573
I see a fucking root already.
421
00:29:09,617 --> 00:29:12,838
Ow ! Cecil, I'm a much better
actress in a studio.
422
00:29:12,881 --> 00:29:15,971
That's not whattime
magazine has to say.
423
00:29:16,015 --> 00:29:18,582
"Miss whitlock seems
a little ill at ease
and past her prime...
424
00:29:18,626 --> 00:29:21,237
"To carry a picture
by herself.
425
00:29:21,281 --> 00:29:24,763
Especially one
as sappy and overproduced
as some kind of happiness."
426
00:29:24,806 --> 00:29:28,897
- Timemagazine said that ?
- Your movie's gonna lose
$30 million.
427
00:29:28,941 --> 00:29:32,292
Can I ask you a question ?
428
00:29:32,335 --> 00:29:34,947
Did you ever fuck Mel Gibson ?
429
00:29:36,426 --> 00:29:38,907
Cecil, give yourself up.
It's not too late.
430
00:29:38,951 --> 00:29:42,650
Our movie goes into profit
the day we sell
the first ticket.
431
00:29:42,693 --> 00:29:45,087
How big is his dick, anyway ?
432
00:29:45,131 --> 00:29:47,568
You know what ?
Come with me to Hollywood,
433
00:29:47,611 --> 00:29:51,224
and I will get you a job
as a production assistant
on a real Hollywood movie.
434
00:29:51,267 --> 00:29:54,618
Tell me about Mel Gibson's
dick and balls !
435
00:29:54,662 --> 00:29:57,404
♪♪ [ Hard rock ]
436
00:30:17,337 --> 00:30:21,732
Dr. Patch, Dr. Patch,
we need it ! Help us !
437
00:30:21,776 --> 00:30:24,344
Dr. Patch ![ All crying ]
438
00:30:24,387 --> 00:30:27,173
Dr. Patch, Dr. Patch, please !
439
00:30:27,216 --> 00:30:30,829
Okay, now remember,
there are no bad takes
in a Cecil b. Demented picture.
440
00:30:30,872 --> 00:30:35,050
Just keep the scene going.Hey, honey, I've never
taken this much acid before.
441
00:30:35,094 --> 00:30:37,487
So if I forget my lines,
cue me.
442
00:30:37,531 --> 00:30:41,883
Do my tits look okay ?
They're more natural
than yours, you know.
443
00:30:41,927 --> 00:30:44,755
Cecil, please don't make me
do this scene.
444
00:30:44,799 --> 00:30:47,933
Your Hollywood system stole our
sex and co-opted our violence,
445
00:30:47,976 --> 00:30:50,849
so there's nothing left for our
kinds of movies, except this.
446
00:30:50,892 --> 00:30:54,156
- Picture's up !
- [ All chattering ]
447
00:30:56,419 --> 00:30:58,552
Go ! Go !
448
00:30:58,595 --> 00:31:02,904
Pam, right here !
Roll camera !
449
00:31:02,948 --> 00:31:04,906
- Camera rolling.
- Speed !
450
00:31:04,950 --> 00:31:07,300
- Mark it !
- Action !
451
00:31:07,343 --> 00:31:10,912
[ Together ]
Sabotage the cinema !
Take back the screen !
452
00:31:10,956 --> 00:31:14,742
Vandalize the movies !
Bring back the dream !
453
00:31:14,785 --> 00:31:18,528
[ Sighs ]
This is so stupid.
454
00:31:18,572 --> 00:31:21,880
- Say the lines
the way they're written !
- Okay.
455
00:31:21,923 --> 00:31:23,925
You read the fucking script !
456
00:31:23,969 --> 00:31:26,145
[ Muttering ]All right, Rodney !
457
00:31:26,188 --> 00:31:28,277
Enough, Rodney !
She looks great !
458
00:31:28,321 --> 00:31:32,281
Thank you.We gotta go !
I said, action !
459
00:31:32,325 --> 00:31:34,240
How dare you play patch Adams!
460
00:31:34,283 --> 00:31:36,416
Oh, my god !
It's honey whitlock !
461
00:31:36,459 --> 00:31:39,506
Patch adamsdoes not deserve
a director's cut.
462
00:31:39,549 --> 00:31:41,551
The first one was long enough !
463
00:31:41,595 --> 00:31:44,511
Hey, you !
You got a problem ?
464
00:31:44,554 --> 00:31:46,905
Feel the pain
of underground film ![ Grunts ]
465
00:31:46,948 --> 00:31:49,124
The kick
of outlaw cinema ![ Groaning ]
466
00:31:49,168 --> 00:31:52,301
Wow, honey, I'm peaking.
467
00:31:53,955 --> 00:31:56,610
I'm Cecil b. Demented,
and you're in my movie.
468
00:31:56,653 --> 00:31:59,526
If you look in the camera
and ruin a take, you're dead.
469
00:31:59,569 --> 00:32:02,268
Do you know Quentin Tarantino ?
I love his movies !
470
00:32:02,311 --> 00:32:04,357
- No ad-libbing !
- [ Screaming ]
471
00:32:04,400 --> 00:32:07,403
Three dollars
for a fucking candy bar !
472
00:32:07,447 --> 00:32:09,623
You call that a medium !
473
00:32:09,666 --> 00:32:12,843
This is still popped
in coconut oil, isn't it ?
474
00:32:12,887 --> 00:32:15,020
[ Gunshot, screaming ]
475
00:32:15,063 --> 00:32:16,891
Hey, what's the trouble here ?
476
00:32:16,935 --> 00:32:19,720
Nobody needs this garbage.
477
00:32:21,940 --> 00:32:25,073
We are the ultimate
bad review.
478
00:32:25,117 --> 00:32:29,643
Please, please.
I-I didn't make this movie.
I'm just the manager.
479
00:32:29,686 --> 00:32:32,559
- [ Grunts ]
- Let's go !
480
00:32:32,602 --> 00:32:35,344
No, it's mine !give it to me,
you bastard !
481
00:32:35,388 --> 00:32:39,131
Dr. Patch, these brats won't give me the--
482
00:32:39,174 --> 00:32:42,047
Dr. Patch, Dr. Patch,
please !
483
00:32:42,090 --> 00:32:45,050
[ Audience screaming ]Places everybody !
Lyle, Cherish, get in here !
484
00:32:45,093 --> 00:32:48,314
Say the lines !
And action !
485
00:32:48,357 --> 00:32:51,186
You don't have to
like this movie.
486
00:32:51,230 --> 00:32:53,362
You're a victim
of advertising !
487
00:32:53,406 --> 00:32:55,886
You've been manipulated
by press agents !
488
00:32:55,930 --> 00:32:59,412
- Patch Adams, you're dead.
- [ Canisters exploding ]
489
00:32:59,455 --> 00:33:01,805
[ Screaming continues ]
490
00:33:01,849 --> 00:33:04,460
[ Coughing, gagging ]
491
00:33:04,504 --> 00:33:07,724
Everybody
wrap it up and run !
492
00:33:07,768 --> 00:33:10,771
[ Hooting, shouting ]
493
00:33:21,825 --> 00:33:23,958
[ Lewis rapping ] ♪ hey, yo, man, listen up
494
00:33:24,002 --> 00:33:26,352
♪ when we say action we mean action, yo ♪
495
00:33:26,395 --> 00:33:28,876
♪ ain't nobody puttin' us in turnaround ♪
496
00:33:28,919 --> 00:33:31,531
♪ you got that, motherfucker we ain't got no budget ♪
497
00:33:31,574 --> 00:33:33,750
♪ no budget ♪ no craft service, man
498
00:33:33,794 --> 00:33:36,797
♪ no budget ♪ we don't take no notes
499
00:33:36,840 --> 00:33:39,191
♪ no budget ♪ no fucking call sheets, yo
500
00:33:39,234 --> 00:33:41,758
♪ no budget ♪ we ain't recouping shit
501
00:33:41,802 --> 00:33:45,066
come on, Cecil, I want
a little action of my own.
502
00:33:45,110 --> 00:33:47,112
I'm trying to write,
Cherish.
503
00:33:47,155 --> 00:33:49,679
♪ We gonna turn
Hollywood out ♪♪ no budget
504
00:33:49,723 --> 00:33:52,682
♪ we don't need the help
of so-called critics ♪
505
00:33:52,726 --> 00:33:55,076
♪ outlaw cinema, brother with the hottest gunslingers ♪yeah !
506
00:33:55,120 --> 00:33:57,383
♪ When we say action cameras start to spin ♪
507
00:33:57,426 --> 00:33:59,341
♪ rip all your studio's
fucking asshole clean ♪
508
00:33:59,385 --> 00:34:02,301
♪ if I direct, ain't gonna be
no motherfuckin' scenes ♪
509
00:34:02,344 --> 00:34:04,564
♪ we'll do the edits
see what no budget means ♪
510
00:34:04,607 --> 00:34:07,045
♪ it's either our way or no way
fuck keeping it clean ♪
511
00:34:07,088 --> 00:34:09,612
Ohhh ! ♪ no budget
512
00:34:09,656 --> 00:34:11,701
♪ no craft service, man
♪ no budget
513
00:34:11,745 --> 00:34:13,964
♪ we don't take no notes ♪ no budget
514
00:34:14,008 --> 00:34:16,402
♪ no fucking call sheets, yo
♪ no budget
515
00:34:16,445 --> 00:34:18,578
♪ we ain't recouping shit ♪ no budget
516
00:34:18,621 --> 00:34:20,754
♪ yeah, we got a start date for real ♪ ♪ no budget
517
00:34:20,797 --> 00:34:23,061
♪ yo, this picture's a go ♪ no budget
518
00:34:23,104 --> 00:34:26,325
♪ we gonna turn Hollywood out ♪ ♪ no budget
519
00:34:26,368 --> 00:34:29,328
♪♪ [ continues, indistinct ][ Sighing ]
it's goat urine.
520
00:34:29,371 --> 00:34:32,200
You want some ?no.
521
00:34:32,244 --> 00:34:36,509
It's a Satan thing.
[ Panting ]
522
00:34:36,552 --> 00:34:39,425
Oh, god, you're so good
in our movie.
523
00:34:39,468 --> 00:34:41,601
♪ We ain't got no budget ♪ no budget
524
00:34:41,644 --> 00:34:43,603
♪ no craft service, man ♪ no budget
525
00:34:43,646 --> 00:34:45,605
♪ we don't take no notes ♪ no budget
526
00:34:45,648 --> 00:34:47,607
♪ no fucking call sheets, yo ♪ no budget
527
00:34:47,650 --> 00:34:50,523
craft service ? ♪ we ain't recouping shit
528
00:34:50,566 --> 00:34:54,135
no, thank you, fidget.
I never drink when I'm working. ♪♪ [ Continues, indistinct ]
529
00:34:54,179 --> 00:34:56,746
That's very kind of you.
530
00:34:56,790 --> 00:35:01,534
Hey, fidget, do your parents
know where you are tonight ?
531
00:35:01,577 --> 00:35:05,190
They're probably mad.
532
00:35:05,233 --> 00:35:08,280
Why don't you
give them a call ?
533
00:35:10,760 --> 00:35:15,765
Cecil says our parents
are the enemies of film.
534
00:35:15,809 --> 00:35:19,856
That's such nonsense.
Go ahead, call 'em up.
535
00:35:19,900 --> 00:35:22,076
I bet they really miss you.
536
00:35:22,120 --> 00:35:24,296
Hey, honey,
you want some crack ?
537
00:35:24,339 --> 00:35:27,342
I most certainly
do not, Lyle.
538
00:35:27,386 --> 00:35:31,564
How can you be a drug addict
in the new millennium ?
It's so retro.
539
00:35:31,607 --> 00:35:36,177
Before I was a drug addict,
I had so many different
problems.
540
00:35:36,221 --> 00:35:40,964
Now I just have one.
Drugs gave my life
real focus.
541
00:35:41,008 --> 00:35:43,924
♪ Keep those cameras rolling motherfuckers start to spin ♪
542
00:35:43,967 --> 00:35:46,361
♪ if I direct, there ain't gonna be no motherfuckin' scenes ♪
543
00:35:46,405 --> 00:35:49,277
♪ we'll do the edits see what no budget means ♪
544
00:35:49,321 --> 00:35:52,280
♪♪ [ continues, indistinct ]How can you see me on film
and not want to fuck me ?
545
00:35:52,324 --> 00:35:55,370
[ Groans ]
I do want to fuck you, Cherish,
but you know I can't.
546
00:35:55,414 --> 00:35:58,808
Why not ?
All my directors fuck me.
547
00:35:58,852 --> 00:36:02,682
I'm not all your directors !
I'm Cecil b. Demented,
548
00:36:02,725 --> 00:36:04,423
the ultimate auteur !
549
00:36:06,990 --> 00:36:10,168
[ Wings flapping ]
550
00:36:10,211 --> 00:36:12,518
♪ We ain't got no budget ♪ no budget
551
00:36:12,561 --> 00:36:17,914
[ microphone feedback ]Soldiers of cinema, save your
sexual energy for the screen.
552
00:36:17,958 --> 00:36:23,137
Our footage is stronger
than Otto preminger's !
553
00:36:23,181 --> 00:36:27,141
Creepier and darker
than David lynch's !
554
00:36:27,185 --> 00:36:31,145
- More exploitive
than herschel Gordon Lewis.
- [ Moaning, grunting ]
555
00:36:31,189 --> 00:36:33,495
And more violent
than Sam Fuller.
556
00:36:36,194 --> 00:36:39,066
We will rise above
our raging hormones...
557
00:36:39,109 --> 00:36:41,808
To a new level
of cinema unrest.
558
00:36:41,851 --> 00:36:45,638
Do whatever it takes
to avoid sexual release !
559
00:36:45,681 --> 00:36:49,250
Get as drunk as Sam peckinpah !
560
00:36:49,294 --> 00:36:52,732
[ Moaning ] As high as rainer Werner fassbinder !
561
00:36:52,775 --> 00:36:55,604
But stay celibate
for celluloid ! Yeah !
562
00:36:55,648 --> 00:36:58,390
[ Phone ringing ] Sex is for our movies, not real life.
563
00:36:58,433 --> 00:37:01,349
Hello ?hi, mom.
It's me-- fidget.
564
00:37:01,393 --> 00:37:04,831
Oh, god, fidget.
Where are you ?
Are you okay ?
565
00:37:04,874 --> 00:37:07,399
I'm fine. The movie's
going great, mom.
566
00:37:07,442 --> 00:37:10,924
Going great ? Fidget,
you're wanted for murder.
567
00:37:10,967 --> 00:37:14,797
Feel the black humor
of almodovar !
568
00:37:14,841 --> 00:37:19,280
- [ Both moaning ]
- The satanic brilliance
of Kenneth anger !
569
00:37:19,324 --> 00:37:24,067
- The racial tension
of spike Lee !
- Mm, mm, mm, mm !
570
00:37:24,111 --> 00:37:27,114
And the unashamed exhibitionism
of William castle !
571
00:37:27,157 --> 00:37:29,943
Hello ?
Fidget, talk to me.
572
00:37:29,986 --> 00:37:34,513
Hello ?
We will come and get you.
Just tell us where you are.
573
00:37:34,556 --> 00:37:37,472
Hello ? Hello ?
574
00:37:37,516 --> 00:37:40,736
Blue balls for celluloid !
575
00:37:40,780 --> 00:37:43,826
Cecil, if we can't have sex, can
we at least make some money ?
576
00:37:43,870 --> 00:37:47,569
Yeah. Lewis thinks
I could have a hit record.
577
00:37:47,613 --> 00:37:52,748
No, no, no, sprocket holes !
I'm a prophet against profit !
578
00:37:52,792 --> 00:37:57,536
And you should refuse
to Sully your artistic vision
with financial success !
579
00:37:57,579 --> 00:38:02,323
Sprocket holes, be strong
and join me in prayer !
580
00:38:02,367 --> 00:38:07,067
Oh, yeah.Oh.
581
00:38:07,110 --> 00:38:12,115
Oh, Andy warhol, we worship you from the new cinema underground.
582
00:38:12,159 --> 00:38:16,337
[ Together ]
Oh, Andy warhol, we worship you
from the new cinema underground.
583
00:38:16,381 --> 00:38:20,341
Fidget, give me that drink. Help us to use our sexual frustration as you did...
584
00:38:20,385 --> 00:38:23,213
Thank youfor the future of outlaw film !
585
00:38:23,257 --> 00:38:27,522
- Say it, sprocket holes !
- Celibate for celluloid !
586
00:38:27,566 --> 00:38:31,613
- Say it again, louder !
- Celibate for celluloid !
587
00:38:31,657 --> 00:38:33,615
Nighty-night.
588
00:38:33,659 --> 00:38:36,357
[ Siren wailing ]
589
00:38:45,801 --> 00:38:48,804
[ Both moaning ]
590
00:38:55,420 --> 00:38:58,074
[ Wings flapping ]
591
00:38:59,989 --> 00:39:02,862
[ Laughs ][ Blow horn blaring ]
592
00:39:02,905 --> 00:39:05,386
[ All gasping ]
593
00:39:05,430 --> 00:39:08,302
Hey, kids, wake up !
594
00:39:08,346 --> 00:39:11,044
Let's make
a motherfuckin' movie !
595
00:39:11,087 --> 00:39:14,526
[ Blow horn continues ] Hey, go, go !
596
00:39:23,491 --> 00:39:25,798
I see that fucking
brown color already !no, no, Rodney !
597
00:39:25,841 --> 00:39:29,584
Those are not roots.
Those are scabs on my scalp.Get up !
598
00:39:29,628 --> 00:39:32,413
And they're raw
from the dye !just close your eyes...
599
00:39:32,457 --> 00:39:36,069
And think of the films
of George cukor.
600
00:39:36,112 --> 00:39:39,028
Raven, you know
you're a really pretty girl.
601
00:39:39,072 --> 00:39:41,466
You could escape
from all this madness.
602
00:39:41,509 --> 00:39:44,512
Escape to what, honey ?
603
00:39:44,556 --> 00:39:49,082
I mean, my father is zo-zo,
the three-headed guard dog
at the gates of hell.
604
00:39:49,125 --> 00:39:51,389
Ow. I'm sorry to hear that.
605
00:39:51,432 --> 00:39:54,653
But one day I'm gonna
commit revolutionary
suicide for celluloid.
606
00:39:54,696 --> 00:39:58,265
No, don't say that !
Rodney, tell her.
No movie is worth dying for.
607
00:39:58,308 --> 00:40:01,007
Ow ! Rodney,
why do you have to hurt me ?
608
00:40:01,050 --> 00:40:03,401
Gay men are supposed
to be gentle.
609
00:40:03,444 --> 00:40:05,751
That's just it, honey.
I'm not gay.Ow.
610
00:40:05,794 --> 00:40:08,231
I'm straight,
and I fucking hate it !
611
00:40:08,275 --> 00:40:12,758
Petie loves me, and I can't
love him back. I've tried.
612
00:40:12,801 --> 00:40:16,544
I kiss him, and
all I feel is whiskers.
613
00:40:16,588 --> 00:40:20,287
I can't take that certain
thickness in his pants.
614
00:40:20,330 --> 00:40:23,899
I'm ashamed
of my heterosexuality !
615
00:40:23,943 --> 00:40:26,162
Oh, it's all right, Rodney.
616
00:40:26,206 --> 00:40:29,470
That's why some days
I gotta hurt people !
617
00:40:29,514 --> 00:40:32,081
- No ! No !
- It's not honey's fault.
618
00:40:32,125 --> 00:40:34,214
Make them pay
for me liking pussy !
619
00:40:34,257 --> 00:40:37,609
Nobody chooses
to be heterosexual.
Honey knows that.
620
00:40:37,652 --> 00:40:40,089
I'm straight,
and I hate !
621
00:40:40,133 --> 00:40:42,701
So get used to it,
honey whitlock ![ Whimpering ]
622
00:40:42,744 --> 00:40:45,007
Ow ! Ow, it's burning me !
623
00:40:45,051 --> 00:40:50,012
Ow ! Ow ! Ow ! Ow ! Ow ! You're hurting me !
624
00:40:50,056 --> 00:40:53,059
Good morning, miss whitlock.
625
00:40:53,102 --> 00:40:55,931
Cecil, I want
to go back to Hollywood.Whatever for ?
626
00:40:55,975 --> 00:40:58,499
Your old career is over,
627
00:40:58,543 --> 00:41:01,154
but your comeback
has just begun.
628
00:41:01,197 --> 00:41:03,504
Roll it.
629
00:41:03,548 --> 00:41:06,551
Well, see, I was in the audience
when they attacked.
630
00:41:06,594 --> 00:41:09,684
Oh ! Honey, man, honey whitlock was awesome !
631
00:41:09,728 --> 00:41:11,686
She was so cool.
632
00:41:11,730 --> 00:41:15,211
[ Girl ] I think honey whitlock is right. Most films suck,
633
00:41:15,255 --> 00:41:17,866
and it's time somebody did something about it.
634
00:41:17,910 --> 00:41:21,217
Nobody forced her
to be in that movie,
but she was damn good.
635
00:41:21,261 --> 00:41:24,090
Scarier than hell,
if you ask me.
636
00:41:24,133 --> 00:41:27,746
She looked different from her other films too. I don't know-- younger.
637
00:41:27,789 --> 00:41:30,270
[ Together ]
Mmm.
638
00:41:30,313 --> 00:41:33,229
Now, there are still
some people who don't
understand our work.
639
00:41:33,273 --> 00:41:35,797
This one's live.
640
00:41:35,841 --> 00:41:40,541
Cecil b. Demented,
the Maryland film commission
refuses to be intimidated...
641
00:41:40,585 --> 00:41:43,588
By your pathetic gang
of cinematic misfits.
642
00:41:47,374 --> 00:41:50,116
That's why we're here today
in the inner harbor...
643
00:41:50,159 --> 00:41:53,206
To celebrate location
shooting in Maryland...
644
00:41:53,249 --> 00:41:56,775
With many of the brave
production and studio heads
from out of state...
645
00:41:56,818 --> 00:42:00,996
Who also say no to cinema terrorism.
646
00:42:01,040 --> 00:42:03,303
[ Applause ]
647
00:42:03,346 --> 00:42:05,871
I have a vision.
648
00:42:08,351 --> 00:42:11,572
And this time,
somebody might have to die.
649
00:42:11,616 --> 00:42:14,096
Ohhh.
650
00:42:14,140 --> 00:42:16,316
Ohhh.
651
00:42:33,115 --> 00:42:35,814
Ow !
652
00:42:45,345 --> 00:42:48,566
Okay, in this scene,
you guys are the avenging angels
of underground cinema.
653
00:42:48,609 --> 00:42:50,959
We'll let those
fat cat producers know.
654
00:42:51,003 --> 00:42:54,833
Yeah, that Maryland isn't safe
for their kind of movies.
655
00:42:54,876 --> 00:42:57,487
Cherish, this is america.
It's a free country.
656
00:42:57,531 --> 00:43:00,795
People can make bad movies
if they so desire.
657
00:43:00,839 --> 00:43:05,234
- Not anymore, they don't.
- You think 'cause you've made
real movies, you're better ?
658
00:43:05,278 --> 00:43:08,716
- Oh, please.
- Do you know why I became
a porno star ?
659
00:43:08,760 --> 00:43:11,023
[ All groaning ]
660
00:43:11,066 --> 00:43:13,286
Cherish has
recovered memory.
661
00:43:13,329 --> 00:43:15,636
Mm-hmm.
When I was ten years old,
662
00:43:15,680 --> 00:43:18,857
my entire family fucked me
under the Christmas tree.
663
00:43:18,900 --> 00:43:22,164
- I'm so sorry.
- Yeah, I bet you are.
664
00:43:22,208 --> 00:43:27,169
"Jingle balls, jingle balls," my
stupid brother started singing.
665
00:43:27,213 --> 00:43:29,650
- [ Laughing ]
- You think that's funny ?
666
00:43:29,694 --> 00:43:32,827
- No, I don't.
- That's all behind you
now, Cherish.
667
00:43:32,871 --> 00:43:35,874
- [ Truck braking ]
- We're here, and we're
making movies.
668
00:43:42,489 --> 00:43:44,186
This way.
669
00:43:46,188 --> 00:43:48,626
"Fuck her,"
yelled my grandmother.
670
00:43:48,669 --> 00:43:51,150
How would you like that
if it happened to you ?i wouldn't.
671
00:43:51,193 --> 00:43:53,369
It's okay, Cherish.
This way.
672
00:43:59,898 --> 00:44:02,074
Hey, honey.What ?
673
00:44:02,117 --> 00:44:05,773
Nervous ? Wanna try
some special k ?i am working, Lyle !
674
00:44:05,817 --> 00:44:09,559
"Human pile,"
screamed my grandfather
as they all jumped on.
675
00:44:09,603 --> 00:44:12,345
Do you even know
what a human pile is ?i do.
676
00:44:12,388 --> 00:44:14,564
I think I can
figure it out.
677
00:44:14,608 --> 00:44:16,305
[ Cecil ] Come on !
678
00:44:18,960 --> 00:44:22,703
[ Commissioner ] Ask anyone who has shot their film in Maryland.
679
00:44:22,747 --> 00:44:26,141
We have the exact location that you need for your next production.
680
00:44:26,185 --> 00:44:28,622
From mountains to beaches. [ Guests slurping ]
681
00:44:28,666 --> 00:44:31,712
From small towns
to urban settings.
682
00:44:31,756 --> 00:44:35,716
My father sat on my face
as he opened his
Christmas presents.
683
00:44:35,760 --> 00:44:39,981
Oh, really ?
Are you sure any of this
really happened ?
684
00:44:40,025 --> 00:44:43,898
Yes, it really happened !
"Oh, Santa, why hast thou
forsaken me," I screamed.
685
00:44:43,942 --> 00:44:46,988
But she doesn't
believe me !i believe you.
686
00:44:47,032 --> 00:44:49,991
Shut up, Cherish ! I told you,
that's all over with.
687
00:44:50,035 --> 00:44:53,038
Save your rage
and use it in the cinema !yes, Cecil.
688
00:44:53,081 --> 00:44:55,388
[ Grunts ]
689
00:44:56,955 --> 00:45:00,610
[ Muttering ]Go ! Go !
690
00:45:00,654 --> 00:45:06,138
The Maryland film commission
pledges to work with state
and federal agencies...
691
00:45:06,181 --> 00:45:08,488
To make your shoot here in Maryland...
692
00:45:08,531 --> 00:45:10,533
As inexpensive and trouble free as possible.
693
00:45:10,577 --> 00:45:14,537
- Hey, hey !
- [ Applause ]
694
00:45:14,581 --> 00:45:18,846
That's why we call Baltimore the Hollywood of the east.
695
00:45:18,890 --> 00:45:21,762
♪♪ [ Fanfare ]
696
00:45:26,462 --> 00:45:30,249
[ Slurping ]
697
00:45:30,292 --> 00:45:32,642
- See Pam there ?
- Yeah.
698
00:45:32,686 --> 00:45:35,341
That's your Mark.
699
00:45:35,384 --> 00:45:38,213
When you hear "action,"
I want you to jump off the roof,
700
00:45:38,257 --> 00:45:40,694
landing in front
of Pam's camera.
701
00:45:49,572 --> 00:45:53,620
Surely you realize
I could be seriously injured.
702
00:45:53,663 --> 00:45:56,971
- Suffer for celluloid !
- There should at least be
an airbag...
703
00:45:57,015 --> 00:46:00,192
Or some kind
of safety precaution.
704
00:46:00,235 --> 00:46:02,803
Just call me irresponsible.
[ Sniffing ]Outlaw cinema has no limits.
705
00:46:02,847 --> 00:46:04,805
[ Snaps fingers ]
706
00:46:04,849 --> 00:46:07,895
Prove yourself, honey,
707
00:46:07,939 --> 00:46:10,506
and maybe you'll live
to read your reviews.
708
00:46:10,550 --> 00:46:13,379
All right, Cecil.
709
00:46:13,422 --> 00:46:16,164
I'm a professional.
Roll the camera.
710
00:46:16,208 --> 00:46:18,166
Places, you fools !
711
00:46:21,343 --> 00:46:24,477
Now, don't worry.
They're just props.
712
00:46:24,520 --> 00:46:27,828
I want you to throw the grenade
after your first line
at the film commissioner.
713
00:46:27,872 --> 00:46:30,048
Nobody will get hurt.
714
00:46:32,877 --> 00:46:36,141
There are bullets in here.
715
00:46:36,184 --> 00:46:38,752
They're blanks.
Trust me, honey.
716
00:46:40,058 --> 00:46:42,800
Lock it up.
717
00:46:55,377 --> 00:46:59,164
Hmm... whoo !
718
00:46:59,207 --> 00:47:01,514
Okay.okay.
719
00:47:07,085 --> 00:47:08,956
Speed !camera rolling !
720
00:47:09,000 --> 00:47:12,438
[ Lyle on radio ]
Mark it !
721
00:47:12,481 --> 00:47:14,179
Action.
722
00:47:17,138 --> 00:47:20,750
[ Screaming ]
723
00:47:20,794 --> 00:47:24,145
- Oh, my god !
- [ Crowd chattering ]
724
00:47:24,189 --> 00:47:27,453
[ Chattering continues ]
725
00:47:27,496 --> 00:47:31,196
Okay, which one of you assholes
insulted our film ?
726
00:47:31,239 --> 00:47:33,459
- Was it you ?
- No. Please.
727
00:47:33,502 --> 00:47:35,374
I-I was only following
studio orders.
728
00:47:37,158 --> 00:47:40,988
[ Crowd screaming ]
729
00:47:41,032 --> 00:47:43,164
[ Chattering continues ]
730
00:47:43,208 --> 00:47:46,211
All extras,
keep eating the oysters,
731
00:47:46,254 --> 00:47:49,388
or you will be shot
and killed !
732
00:47:49,431 --> 00:47:53,261
Pam, shoot those oysters ! Hey, you ![ Slurping ]
733
00:47:53,305 --> 00:47:55,220
Keep eating ![ Gagging ]
734
00:47:55,263 --> 00:47:58,136
Keep eating, you fuckers !
735
00:47:58,179 --> 00:48:01,704
Didn't you produce
that bad Hollywood remake
of that beautiful foreign film ?
736
00:48:01,748 --> 00:48:04,620
I had to.
You know American audiences
won't watch subtitles.
737
00:48:08,146 --> 00:48:11,366
Didn't you just green light
another movie based
on a video game ?
738
00:48:11,410 --> 00:48:14,152
It wasn't my idea !
I'm just the vice president
of creative affairs !
739
00:48:15,675 --> 00:48:19,418
No, please don't shoot me !
I don't even go to the movies !
740
00:48:23,988 --> 00:48:26,512
Rodney !
741
00:48:26,555 --> 00:48:28,514
[ Screaming continues ]
742
00:48:35,347 --> 00:48:38,654
Help ! I'm honey whitlock !
743
00:48:38,698 --> 00:48:41,396
- [ Screams ]
- Nobody said cut !
744
00:48:43,529 --> 00:48:47,446
Help, Cherish !
I'm stuck in a k-hole,
and I can't get out !
745
00:48:49,143 --> 00:48:52,973
- [ Grunts ]
- Come on, Lyle.
746
00:48:53,017 --> 00:48:55,976
[ Loud feedback ]Oh, shit !
747
00:48:56,020 --> 00:48:58,283
Finish the fucking scene !
748
00:48:59,980 --> 00:49:03,070
Bad movies must be avenged !
749
00:49:07,640 --> 00:49:09,816
[ Nervous chuckle ]
750
00:49:09,859 --> 00:49:12,340
That's a cut !
[ Grunts ]
751
00:49:12,384 --> 00:49:14,081
[ Raven ] Cecil !
752
00:49:17,041 --> 00:49:20,131
Here.[ Mutters ]
753
00:49:20,174 --> 00:49:22,524
- Where are you going ?
- Don't shoot !
754
00:49:22,568 --> 00:49:25,832
- I'm honey whitlock,
and I've been kidnapped.
- Come back !
755
00:49:25,875 --> 00:49:29,879
No ! No !
We'll go to Sundance
together, I promise !
756
00:49:29,923 --> 00:49:34,580
Hey, don't you know
who I am ? Excuse me,
I will have you fired !
757
00:49:34,623 --> 00:49:37,583
Don't you know that I'm an academy award nominee ?
758
00:49:37,626 --> 00:49:40,586
[ Gunshots ]Cecil, help me !
759
00:49:40,629 --> 00:49:42,936
Help ! Ow ! Ow ! Ow !
760
00:49:42,980 --> 00:49:45,983
[ Chattering continues ]
761
00:49:48,289 --> 00:49:50,291
Help !let's roll !
762
00:49:50,335 --> 00:49:52,990
Help, Cecil !
763
00:49:55,209 --> 00:49:57,864
[ Tires screeching ]
764
00:49:57,907 --> 00:49:59,909
[ Siren wailing ][ Honey ]
attica !
765
00:49:59,953 --> 00:50:04,088
Rodney king !
David begelman !
[ Yelling ]
766
00:50:04,871 --> 00:50:07,613
Let me go !
Let me out of here !
767
00:50:07,656 --> 00:50:11,182
[ Honey screaming ]
768
00:50:11,225 --> 00:50:12,966
- [ Dinah ]
Picture's up !
- Roll !
769
00:50:13,010 --> 00:50:15,969
Speed !hey, it's your close-up !
770
00:50:16,013 --> 00:50:18,102
- [ Chuckling ]
- [ Siren continues ]
771
00:50:18,145 --> 00:50:20,713
- I hate your movies !
- Action !
772
00:50:20,756 --> 00:50:23,716
Long live
guerrilla filmmaking !
773
00:50:23,759 --> 00:50:25,761
[ Dinah ]
Look out ! Shit !
774
00:50:25,805 --> 00:50:29,026
[ Together ]
Whoa ! Whoa ! Whoa !
775
00:50:29,069 --> 00:50:31,767
Cut ! Cut ! [ Gunshot ]
776
00:50:33,813 --> 00:50:37,382
- [ Tires screeching ]
- [ Siren approaching ]
777
00:50:37,425 --> 00:50:39,645
[ Shouting, screaming ]
778
00:50:43,431 --> 00:50:45,433
[ Groans ]
779
00:50:47,740 --> 00:50:49,611
I am Cecil b. Demented,
the enemy of family films !
780
00:50:49,655 --> 00:50:51,961
[ Gun clicks ]Shit !
781
00:50:52,005 --> 00:50:55,530
- You couldn't direct traffic ! - [ Lewis ] These cops aren't goin' nowhere.
782
00:50:55,574 --> 00:50:58,751
Go back to film school, stupid !straight to video--
that's what you are !
783
00:50:58,794 --> 00:51:01,797
[ Grunting ] [ Woman #1 ] I hate films !
784
00:51:01,841 --> 00:51:05,627
- Pam, film these fuckers !
- [ Dinah ]
Picture's up !
785
00:51:05,671 --> 00:51:07,934
We don't wanna be
in your sick little movie !
786
00:51:07,977 --> 00:51:10,284
Camera rolling !
Speed !
787
00:51:10,328 --> 00:51:14,114
- [ Woman #2 ]
Pay us, cheapskate !
- I'm not anybody's extra !
788
00:51:14,158 --> 00:51:16,290
[ Woman #3 ] I don't do anything for art !action !
789
00:51:16,334 --> 00:51:20,468
- I'm sick of violence !
- Oh, I can't stand the f word !
790
00:51:20,512 --> 00:51:24,864
- Yeah ? Well, your movies
bite the big one !
- We want frontal nudity !
791
00:51:24,907 --> 00:51:27,997
Ow, ow, ow !ow ! Keep the scene going !
792
00:51:28,041 --> 00:51:31,871
- You stink, honey whitlock !
- You came in fifth
in the oscars.
793
00:51:31,914 --> 00:51:34,830
You didn't write me dialogue ?you're one of us now.
You know what to say.
794
00:51:34,874 --> 00:51:37,224
I walk out of your films
on airplanes !
795
00:51:37,268 --> 00:51:40,836
Family is just a dirty word
for censorship !nice !
796
00:51:40,880 --> 00:51:43,839
- [ All gasping ]
- Cut ! Movin' on !
797
00:51:43,883 --> 00:51:46,494
Come on !
Let's get out of here !
798
00:51:46,538 --> 00:51:49,062
[ Dinah ]
Fucking families !
Let's go !
799
00:51:49,106 --> 00:51:51,717
♪ Whoa-ho
800
00:51:51,760 --> 00:51:55,286
♪ ya-ha-ho-ho come on !
801
00:51:55,329 --> 00:52:00,160
♪ Ya-ha-ho-ho
802
00:52:00,204 --> 00:52:02,597
come on, go !
Come on, come on !
Come on, come on !
803
00:52:02,641 --> 00:52:05,034
[ Chattering ]Go, go, go, go !
Move, move !
804
00:52:05,078 --> 00:52:07,167
[ Chattering, shouting ]
805
00:52:07,211 --> 00:52:09,300
[ Grunting ]
806
00:52:11,563 --> 00:52:15,001
[ Laughing ]
807
00:52:15,044 --> 00:52:17,743
- [ Yelling ]
- [ Audience laughing, hooting ]
808
00:52:20,006 --> 00:52:22,356
Action fans, help us !
809
00:52:22,400 --> 00:52:25,272
[ Audience ]
Yeah !come on, come on, come on !
810
00:52:25,316 --> 00:52:28,449
Yeah, Cecil ! Come on ! [ Chattering continues ]
811
00:52:28,493 --> 00:52:31,626
Come on, come on !go, go !
812
00:52:31,670 --> 00:52:34,934
[ Door opens ]
813
00:52:34,977 --> 00:52:37,893
[ Together ]
Families ! Families ![ Grunting ]
814
00:52:37,937 --> 00:52:41,114
- [ Yells ]
- [ Shouting,
grunting continue ]
815
00:52:45,205 --> 00:52:47,164
Give me your autograph.
816
00:52:47,207 --> 00:52:51,080
Honey, honey, honey.All right, all right.
Enough, enough.
817
00:52:57,913 --> 00:53:00,220
Cecil b. Demented
wants your keys.
818
00:53:00,264 --> 00:53:02,440
Fuck him.
He ain't gonna get distribution.
819
00:53:02,483 --> 00:53:05,182
Oh, you wanna bet ?
[ Shouting ]
820
00:53:05,225 --> 00:53:07,967
[ Grunting ]
821
00:53:08,010 --> 00:53:09,969
[ Grunts ]
822
00:53:10,012 --> 00:53:12,798
Yeah, baby, yeah !
Let's go !
823
00:53:12,841 --> 00:53:14,843
[ Chattering continues ]Honey, honey !
824
00:53:14,887 --> 00:53:17,368
Thanks, honey.
[ Giggles ]Honey, honey, I love you !
825
00:53:17,411 --> 00:53:20,545
[ Grumbling ]
826
00:53:22,590 --> 00:53:24,940
Go !let's go ! Let's go !
827
00:53:24,984 --> 00:53:27,334
[ Shouting ]
828
00:53:28,770 --> 00:53:30,729
[ Crowd ] Honey, honey !
829
00:53:30,772 --> 00:53:33,732
Hey, hey, honey,
sign my parole card ?
830
00:53:33,775 --> 00:53:37,214
It's okay !
We're criminals too !
831
00:53:37,257 --> 00:53:39,955
I love you ! [ Men hooting ] We love you !
832
00:53:39,999 --> 00:53:42,741
You're crazy ![ Shouting, hooting continue ]
833
00:53:49,051 --> 00:53:51,663
♪♪ [ R&B ] [ Searing hiss ]
834
00:53:51,706 --> 00:53:55,710
[ Grunting ]The slash and burn
of the white hot metal...
835
00:53:55,754 --> 00:53:59,888
Will brand you forever with
the logo of Cecil b. Demented.
836
00:53:59,932 --> 00:54:02,717
Wear the privileged scar
of cinema sainthood...
837
00:54:02,761 --> 00:54:06,243
With pride and horniness.[ Chardonnay vocalizing ]
838
00:54:09,158 --> 00:54:12,466
[ Vocalizing continues ]
839
00:54:21,301 --> 00:54:24,609
♪ God, our protector
840
00:54:24,652 --> 00:54:26,611
♪ yeah
841
00:54:26,654 --> 00:54:31,398
♪ main film director
842
00:54:31,442 --> 00:54:34,706
♪ give us a cue
843
00:54:36,969 --> 00:54:40,102
♪ we'll follow you
844
00:54:40,146 --> 00:54:44,672
♪ demented forever
845
00:54:44,716 --> 00:54:48,110
♪ demented for life
846
00:54:48,154 --> 00:54:51,331
there is no such thing
as family. ♪♪ [ Singing continues ]
847
00:54:51,375 --> 00:54:56,423
We are the orphans of cinema,
and without our movie,
we do not exist.
848
00:54:56,467 --> 00:54:59,774
We are not human. We are all part of one giant projector.
849
00:54:59,818 --> 00:55:03,474
And our blood is the film that will be shown to the world.
850
00:55:03,517 --> 00:55:05,345
My real life began
in the cinema.
851
00:55:05,389 --> 00:55:07,608
[ Flesh sears ][ Gasps ]
852
00:55:07,652 --> 00:55:10,132
And it will end
in the cinema !
853
00:55:10,176 --> 00:55:14,180
[ Together ]
♪ demented forever
854
00:55:14,223 --> 00:55:18,140
from the valleys of Lebanon--
[ Gasps ][ Searing continues ]
855
00:55:18,184 --> 00:55:22,710
[ Yells ]
To the jungles of Cuba !
856
00:55:23,972 --> 00:55:25,713
[ Grunts ]
857
00:55:27,802 --> 00:55:30,414
Film revolutionaries
can never be stopped.
858
00:55:30,457 --> 00:55:33,634
♪ Demented forever [ Together ] ♪ demented forever
859
00:55:35,375 --> 00:55:38,291
♪ demented for life
860
00:55:38,335 --> 00:55:41,512
Rodney died for the roots
of cinematic rebellion.
861
00:55:41,555 --> 00:55:43,862
And he's now in cinema hell,
862
00:55:43,905 --> 00:55:47,300
where one day
we'll all be reunited.
863
00:55:47,344 --> 00:55:49,389
Pleasure is pain !
864
00:55:49,433 --> 00:55:51,957
Slavery is freedom !
865
00:55:52,000 --> 00:55:54,307
Suicide for Satan !
866
00:55:54,351 --> 00:55:57,354
♪ Demented forever
867
00:56:01,140 --> 00:56:04,883
but our film could still be
a hit even after we're dead,
right, Cecil ?
868
00:56:04,926 --> 00:56:09,670
♪ Demented forever [ Crew ] ♪ demented forever
869
00:56:12,107 --> 00:56:14,066
fidget.
870
00:56:26,557 --> 00:56:30,082
Fidget's a good boy,
and we love him.
871
00:56:30,125 --> 00:56:32,606
And we will stand behind our son no matter what he's done.
872
00:56:34,347 --> 00:56:36,915
No ! I wanna go home !
873
00:56:36,958 --> 00:56:39,091
I don't wanna be
in show business anymore !
874
00:56:39,134 --> 00:56:41,528
I knew you were the weak one,
fidget.
875
00:56:45,053 --> 00:56:48,927
Just remember,
your parents liked Godzilla.
876
00:56:48,970 --> 00:56:51,669
They wouldn't even let you
see r-rated films as a child.
877
00:56:51,712 --> 00:56:55,237
They've never even been
to a midnight movie.
878
00:56:55,281 --> 00:56:57,762
They enjoy classic
TV sitcoms turned into
feature-length films.
879
00:56:57,805 --> 00:57:00,765
- They've never rented
a porno movie.
- And to top it all off,
880
00:57:00,808 --> 00:57:03,332
they talk out loud
in the theater once
the feature has begun.
881
00:57:03,376 --> 00:57:06,684
- [ Crew ] Oh !
- Oh, that really is
unforgivable, fidget.
882
00:57:12,516 --> 00:57:15,127
Okay, okay ! My parents
are the enemies of film !
883
00:57:15,170 --> 00:57:17,390
Do it !
884
00:57:17,434 --> 00:57:20,611
[ Crew ] Yeah ! All right !
885
00:57:20,654 --> 00:57:25,529
- Demented forever !
- [ Together ]
♪ demented forever
886
00:57:25,572 --> 00:57:28,357
and you, honey ?
887
00:57:32,536 --> 00:57:34,538
No, Cecil.
888
00:57:36,365 --> 00:57:38,716
So tell me the truth now.[ Audience applauding ]
889
00:57:38,759 --> 00:57:40,457
Did you ever,
in all those years,
890
00:57:40,500 --> 00:57:43,285
suspect that your ex-wife...
891
00:57:43,329 --> 00:57:46,506
Had, well, you know,
radical tendencies ?
892
00:57:46,550 --> 00:57:49,553
Well, I'll tell you, roseanne.
893
00:57:49,596 --> 00:57:53,382
I was married to honey whitlock
for seven years,[ Audience gasps ]
894
00:57:53,426 --> 00:57:56,821
And I'm not a bit surprised
what a nut she really is.
895
00:57:56,864 --> 00:57:59,258
[ Audience laughing ]Oh, thanks a lot.
896
00:57:59,301 --> 00:58:01,782
Satan loves you, honey.
897
00:58:01,826 --> 00:58:04,263
And so do I.
898
00:58:04,306 --> 00:58:07,701
Honey whitlock was always attracted to the wrong kind of man.
899
00:58:07,745 --> 00:58:10,312
I wouldn't be surprised
if she was in on her kidnapping
from the very beginning.
900
00:58:10,356 --> 00:58:13,228
She'd do anything for sex.
901
00:58:13,272 --> 00:58:16,623
- [ TV: Male reporter ] The Maryland film commission--
- you ain't seen nothing yet.
902
00:58:16,667 --> 00:58:21,280
Cecil b. Demented,
you can never stop Hollywood.
903
00:58:21,323 --> 00:58:24,109
The Maryland film commission
is pleased to announce...
904
00:58:24,152 --> 00:58:28,679
There will be no delay
in tomorrow's once-secret
start date...
905
00:58:28,722 --> 00:58:34,641
For the $65 million shot
entirely in Baltimore sequel...
906
00:58:34,685 --> 00:58:38,819
To the Oscar-winning masterpiece Forrest Gump,
907
00:58:38,863 --> 00:58:42,606
gump again,
starring Kevin nealon.[ All scoffing ]
908
00:58:42,649 --> 00:58:46,479
I think I speak
for every member of the academy
of the arts and sciences...
909
00:58:46,523 --> 00:58:48,437
When I say, honey whitlock,
910
00:58:48,481 --> 00:58:52,224
you are a disgrace to the entire
Hollywood community.
911
00:58:55,575 --> 00:58:57,534
Say it.
912
00:59:05,629 --> 00:59:07,935
Demented forever.
913
00:59:09,502 --> 00:59:11,504
[ Crew ] Yeah, yeah, yeah.
914
00:59:11,548 --> 00:59:16,465
Yeah. Oh, yeah.
915
00:59:16,509 --> 00:59:21,645
[ Sighs ]
This time,
ihave a fucking vision.
916
00:59:49,586 --> 00:59:51,762
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
917
00:59:56,375 --> 00:59:58,638
Can I help you ?
918
00:59:58,682 --> 01:00:01,510
We got a delivery
for Kevin nealon
from Paramount studios.
919
01:00:01,554 --> 01:00:03,556
Shh.
920
01:00:04,949 --> 01:00:07,299
Largest box of chocolates
we ever made.
921
01:00:07,342 --> 01:00:09,301
Shh, shh.
922
01:00:11,738 --> 01:00:14,219
Well, I'm gonna have
to check your truck out.
923
01:00:14,262 --> 01:00:16,264
Sure.
924
01:00:21,922 --> 01:00:24,969
You never know
what you're gonna find inside.
925
01:00:25,012 --> 01:00:26,971
[ Guns cock ]Action !
926
01:00:27,014 --> 01:00:30,714
[ Stun gun buzzes ][ Chattering ]
get him in !
927
01:00:33,847 --> 01:00:36,154
All right.
Just keep an eye on the shot.
928
01:00:36,197 --> 01:00:38,547
[ Chattering continues ]Add his hair dye.
That's it.
929
01:00:38,591 --> 01:00:40,854
Looks good.
Nice, nice.
930
01:00:40,898 --> 01:00:43,378
Jean-Pierre, you okay ?
You need another
camera rehearsal ?
931
01:00:43,422 --> 01:00:46,555
No, sir. We're set.
932
01:00:46,599 --> 01:00:50,211
Do you believe how long it took
'em to do that last shot ?it's unbelievable.
933
01:00:50,255 --> 01:00:53,693
The money they're throwing away
here is unbelievable.
You got a pair of sevens.
934
01:00:53,737 --> 01:00:56,000
That's not bad.
Hey, you're cheatin' over there.
935
01:00:56,043 --> 01:00:58,045
[ Laughs ]What do you got,
a Jack, king ?
936
01:00:58,089 --> 01:01:01,701
- [ Grunts ] - What's the matter with you ?- hey !
937
01:01:01,745 --> 01:01:04,225
We're nonunion, and
we're taking over this movie !
938
01:01:04,269 --> 01:01:06,401
Okay. Let's shoot
this sucker.You got it.
939
01:01:06,445 --> 01:01:08,752
[ Woman ] Okay, people. Clear the set.
940
01:01:08,795 --> 01:01:11,668
And... lock it up !
941
01:01:12,712 --> 01:01:14,627
We don't have to take--
942
01:01:14,671 --> 01:01:16,673
[ both gagging ]
943
01:01:18,631 --> 01:01:22,026
[ Grunts ]
Son of a bitch !
944
01:01:22,069 --> 01:01:25,246
[ Grumbling ]Get this motherfucker
off of me !
945
01:01:25,290 --> 01:01:28,249
[ Both grumbling ]
946
01:01:29,686 --> 01:01:32,210
It's already locked down.Picture's up.
947
01:01:32,253 --> 01:01:36,605
[ Grunting, whimpering ]
948
01:01:37,955 --> 01:01:42,394
[ Director ] Well, is there a problem ?
949
01:01:42,437 --> 01:01:44,657
Where's the a.D. ?
950
01:01:44,701 --> 01:01:46,659
[ Gasps ][ Gasps ]
951
01:01:46,703 --> 01:01:49,531
Janine. Where the fuck is Janine ?
952
01:01:51,185 --> 01:01:53,840
I'm getting older here.
953
01:01:53,884 --> 01:01:56,495
[ Stun gun buzzes ] Budget's climbing !
954
01:01:56,538 --> 01:01:59,193
$1,000 a second. $1,000 a second.
955
01:01:59,237 --> 01:02:01,326
$1,000 a second.
956
01:02:01,369 --> 01:02:04,590
That's what it's costing while we wait, gang ![ Grunting ]
957
01:02:06,287 --> 01:02:08,289
I don't know what the problem is.
958
01:02:09,638 --> 01:02:11,858
Jesus, can we shoot ?roll sound.
959
01:02:11,902 --> 01:02:14,121
Sound speed.
960
01:02:14,165 --> 01:02:16,080
- [ Grunts ]
- [ Feedback ]
961
01:02:16,123 --> 01:02:18,778
Can I have fucking quiet ?
962
01:02:18,822 --> 01:02:21,999
Camera rolling. Finally !mark it.
963
01:02:22,739 --> 01:02:25,785
And... action.
964
01:02:30,834 --> 01:02:34,228
Hello, my name's forrest.
Forrest Gump.
965
01:02:34,272 --> 01:02:37,536
That's a damn shame.
966
01:02:37,579 --> 01:02:39,973
[ Nealon ] You want some of my crab cakes ?
967
01:02:40,017 --> 01:02:43,411
I don't eat scavengers.
You know what crabs eat ?
968
01:02:43,455 --> 01:02:45,936
Fish feces.
969
01:02:45,979 --> 01:02:49,069
Well, my momma always said,
"gump happens."
970
01:02:49,113 --> 01:02:51,898
Shucks, I guess life
is a lot like a crab cake.
971
01:02:51,942 --> 01:02:54,640
There's lots of good stuff in the middle,
972
01:02:54,683 --> 01:02:56,947
but it's surrounded
by a bunch of crap.
973
01:02:56,990 --> 01:03:00,385
- Cut !
- What the hell ?
974
01:03:00,428 --> 01:03:03,475
I am Cecil b. Demented,
and this picture is terminated !
975
01:03:03,518 --> 01:03:06,391
Get off my set now !
What do you think you're doing ?
976
01:03:07,871 --> 01:03:11,309
Nobody can stop the popularity of Forrest Gump.
977
01:03:11,352 --> 01:03:16,314
Fuckin' little scabs !we'll get their little
16-millimeter asses.
978
01:03:16,357 --> 01:03:20,144
I got it.Nobody fucks with
the brotherhood of teamsters !
979
01:03:20,187 --> 01:03:23,669
[ All grumbling, shouting ]
980
01:03:23,712 --> 01:03:27,934
Ow, that hurt !
Are you out of your mind ?
Get me out of here !
981
01:03:27,978 --> 01:03:30,371
Mark it.
982
01:03:30,415 --> 01:03:32,373
That's entertainment.
983
01:03:32,417 --> 01:03:34,854
And... action !
984
01:03:34,898 --> 01:03:37,683
I fucking hateforrest gump !
985
01:03:37,726 --> 01:03:39,990
I only take the roles
I'm offered, ma'am.
986
01:03:40,033 --> 01:03:42,906
Are you this desperate for publicity, honey whitlock ?
987
01:03:42,949 --> 01:03:45,865
Don't step on my lines,
asshole !
988
01:03:45,909 --> 01:03:47,954
[ Whispering ]
Shh, shh, shh !
Quiet !
989
01:03:49,695 --> 01:03:52,959
- No more per diems !
- Please, I'm a local hire !
990
01:03:53,003 --> 01:03:56,833
- No more meal penalties.
- Yes, ma'am.
We're off the clock.
991
01:03:56,876 --> 01:04:01,750
And no more free food
at international film festivals
for you either, hack !
992
01:04:01,794 --> 01:04:03,752
The director's guild
of america...
993
01:04:03,796 --> 01:04:06,973
Will bring down its swift sword
of justice on you rank amateurs.
994
01:04:09,193 --> 01:04:11,238
[ Man ] Go !
995
01:04:11,282 --> 01:04:15,155
Drugs !
Give me poppers.
996
01:04:15,199 --> 01:04:17,854
It's okay.
We got it on film.
Keep going !
997
01:04:17,897 --> 01:04:20,421
[ Sniffing ]
998
01:04:20,465 --> 01:04:23,772
Visions of light !
999
01:04:23,816 --> 01:04:26,253
Death to all who are
cinematically incorrect !
1000
01:04:26,297 --> 01:04:29,604
- That means you fuckers !
- [ Lewis ] Yeah !
1001
01:04:29,648 --> 01:04:31,606
[ Grunts ] [ Cherish ] Cecil !
1002
01:04:31,650 --> 01:04:34,871
[ Grunting ] [ Gunshots continue ]
1003
01:04:34,914 --> 01:04:36,829
[ Lewis ] Yo, get him ! Get him !
1004
01:04:36,873 --> 01:04:40,050
[ Grunts ]
1005
01:04:40,093 --> 01:04:42,748
Shit !
Let's get out of here !call the driver !
1006
01:04:45,359 --> 01:04:47,579
- [ Petie ] Cecil, get down !
- [ Dinah ] Losers, die !
1007
01:04:47,622 --> 01:04:51,235
- [ Shouts ]
- [ Grunts ]
1008
01:04:51,278 --> 01:04:53,759
Cecil !
[ Grunts ]
1009
01:04:56,980 --> 01:05:01,114
[ Dinah ] Look out ! Get him ! Get him !
1010
01:05:05,510 --> 01:05:09,340
- Honey, get down !
- [ Cecil ] Cherish,
look out ! Get down !
1011
01:05:09,383 --> 01:05:11,342
[ Lewis ] Get him, get him, baby !
1012
01:05:11,385 --> 01:05:13,648
Good work, Cherish !thank you.
1013
01:05:13,692 --> 01:05:17,957
- [ Cecil ]
Fix your costume. Come on.
- Wild sound !
1014
01:05:18,001 --> 01:05:20,003
[ Yells ]
1015
01:05:25,269 --> 01:05:30,230
- [ Yells ]
- [ Man ]
Help, help ! Shoot ! Shoot !
1016
01:05:30,274 --> 01:05:33,190
[ Raven ] Oh, my god ! Oh, no ! [ Chattering, shouting ]
1017
01:05:33,233 --> 01:05:38,673
Dinah ! [ Gunshots continue ]
1018
01:05:41,198 --> 01:05:42,939
[ Chattering, grunting ]
1019
01:05:42,982 --> 01:05:44,941
Oh, god.
1020
01:05:47,465 --> 01:05:50,685
Hey, hey, man.
What's wrong ?
Stapled ? Huh !
1021
01:05:55,908 --> 01:06:00,913
Oh, thank god !
[ Gasping, laughing ]
1022
01:06:00,957 --> 01:06:03,350
[ Cherish ] Oh, god ! [ Cecil grunting ]
1023
01:06:06,614 --> 01:06:08,877
[ Men groaning ]
1024
01:06:08,921 --> 01:06:12,011
Dear diary,
1025
01:06:12,055 --> 01:06:17,799
another day,
and it's the same old thing.
1026
01:06:17,843 --> 01:06:20,846
[ Groaning continues ] Everywhere I go,
1027
01:06:20,889 --> 01:06:24,458
everything I do just seems to lead...
1028
01:06:24,502 --> 01:06:27,461
To the same dead end--
1029
01:06:27,505 --> 01:06:30,595
my derriere.[ All sighing ]
1030
01:06:32,075 --> 01:06:34,599
Hey, buddy,
I'm in a little bit of trouble.
1031
01:06:34,642 --> 01:06:38,951
Oh, my god ! It's you !
I was just looking at your ass
in this magazine.
1032
01:06:38,995 --> 01:06:42,128
Yeah, that's my ass, all right,
and it's in trouble. Can me
and my friends come inside ?
1033
01:06:42,172 --> 01:06:45,305
Oh, sure can.
Oh, we sell your ass. Hi.
1034
01:06:45,349 --> 01:06:47,699
Hi.
1035
01:06:47,742 --> 01:06:50,963
I can't believe it's her !
I beat off to her every night.
1036
01:06:51,007 --> 01:06:53,357
Would you sign it...
To sniffles ?
1037
01:06:53,400 --> 01:06:55,968
- One f or two ?
- Two.
1038
01:06:56,012 --> 01:06:59,015
Oh.bad night, huh ?
1039
01:06:59,058 --> 01:07:02,975
- Right.
- Go on in. Pop a load.
1040
01:07:03,019 --> 01:07:04,759
Uh, guys.
1041
01:07:08,285 --> 01:07:13,377
Why is it that men
only want my ass ?
1042
01:07:13,420 --> 01:07:17,294
[ Groaning continues ]
1043
01:07:17,337 --> 01:07:20,601
- Do you know why,
little pellet ?
- [ Gerbil squealing ]
1044
01:07:23,169 --> 01:07:25,911
Good pellet.
1045
01:07:25,954 --> 01:07:29,088
Oh, bad pellet.
1046
01:07:29,132 --> 01:07:31,873
[ Cherish moaning ]
1047
01:07:31,917 --> 01:07:36,574
Oh, pellet, you're
a very naughty gerbil.
1048
01:07:36,617 --> 01:07:39,751
[ Men moaning ]Yes, you are.
1049
01:07:39,794 --> 01:07:43,885
You're gonna be mommy's good pellet, aren't you ?
1050
01:07:43,929 --> 01:07:46,105
[ Moaning continues ]Whoops !
1051
01:07:46,149 --> 01:07:49,326
[ All moaning ] Pellet !
1052
01:07:49,369 --> 01:07:52,242
[ Lewis ] Yeah. Where are you, little gerbil ?
1053
01:07:52,285 --> 01:07:53,982
[ Cecil ]
Hey ![ Moaning stops ]
1054
01:07:54,026 --> 01:07:57,203
[ Lewis ] Sorry. Here, pellet.[ Grunts ]
1055
01:07:57,247 --> 01:08:00,163
Mommy's got some cereal
for you.
1056
01:08:00,206 --> 01:08:03,122
[ Squealing ] [ Moaning intensifies ]
1057
01:08:06,169 --> 01:08:09,172
I'll be your cinema slave.
1058
01:08:13,828 --> 01:08:15,743
Where are they, you pervert ?who ?
1059
01:08:15,787 --> 01:08:17,963
There's no one here
but us whackers.
1060
01:08:18,006 --> 01:08:19,747
[ Grunts ]
1061
01:08:21,314 --> 01:08:24,012
Demented forever.
1062
01:08:25,884 --> 01:08:29,496
[ Moaning continues ] [ Pellet squealing ]
1063
01:08:31,194 --> 01:08:34,849
[ Moaning intensifies ]
1064
01:08:34,893 --> 01:08:39,289
Hey, pal, that's illegal, huh ? Hey, I paid my admission price.
1065
01:08:39,332 --> 01:08:42,030
Pellet ![ Men ]
oh !
1066
01:08:42,074 --> 01:08:45,643
[ Pop ][ Gasps ]
1067
01:08:45,686 --> 01:08:49,168
Not there, pellet !
Rear entry !
1068
01:08:49,212 --> 01:08:51,866
[ Audience sighing ]
1069
01:08:54,652 --> 01:08:56,610
There !
1070
01:08:56,654 --> 01:08:58,960
[ Cherish moaning ]Porno fans !
1071
01:08:59,004 --> 01:09:03,269
It's me ! Cherish !
And I need your hard-core help !
1072
01:09:03,313 --> 01:09:07,534
- The teamsters are here.
- [ Audience ]
We love you, Cherish !
1073
01:09:07,578 --> 01:09:12,409
Long live Cecil b. Demented,
a friend of pornography !
1074
01:09:12,452 --> 01:09:14,498
[ Moaning continues ] [ Cherish chattering on screen ]
1075
01:09:14,541 --> 01:09:17,588
[ Nervous laughter ]
Hey, keep that thing
away from me.
1076
01:09:17,631 --> 01:09:20,460
Hey, hey, hey !
Back it up !
1077
01:09:20,504 --> 01:09:23,507
Hey, whoa, whoa !
Hey, hey !
1078
01:09:23,550 --> 01:09:25,465
[ Cherish shouting on screen ] Get it ! Get it ! Get in there ! Get in there !
1079
01:09:25,509 --> 01:09:28,773
Oh, yes ! Pellet ! Pellet !
1080
01:09:28,816 --> 01:09:31,254
Get it, boy ! Go on, pellet !
1081
01:09:31,297 --> 01:09:34,170
Get it ! Yes ! Do it to me, baby !
1082
01:09:44,528 --> 01:09:47,618
Dear diary,
1083
01:09:49,402 --> 01:09:51,578
my husband...
1084
01:09:51,622 --> 01:09:53,624
Is trying...
1085
01:09:53,667 --> 01:09:56,453
To kill me.
1086
01:10:01,980 --> 01:10:04,548
- Three, please.
- $15.
1087
01:10:10,945 --> 01:10:14,601
Cool as shit.
Honey whitlock can open
any picture.
1088
01:10:14,645 --> 01:10:16,951
[ Scoffs ]
Nowshe can.
1089
01:10:16,995 --> 01:10:20,607
We should blow up
the people's choice awards.
That's what we should do.
1090
01:10:20,651 --> 01:10:24,002
Hey, calm down.Bomb planet Hollywood.
1091
01:10:24,045 --> 01:10:27,092
Would you get a hold
of yourself ?
1092
01:10:27,135 --> 01:10:29,834
- Two adults.
- $10.
1093
01:10:33,490 --> 01:10:35,666
Hey, that's pretty good !
1094
01:10:35,709 --> 01:10:38,103
Thanks.
What do I get if I win ?
1095
01:10:38,146 --> 01:10:41,149
A big ham. What else ?
[ Laughing ]
1096
01:10:47,373 --> 01:10:49,332
[ Sighs ]
1097
01:10:51,725 --> 01:10:54,119
This is it--
our final location.
1098
01:10:54,162 --> 01:10:56,121
Where we're gonna
get laid !
1099
01:10:56,164 --> 01:10:58,950
Nobody leaves this drive-in
alive until we finish our film.
1100
01:10:58,993 --> 01:11:01,692
Totally radical !
1101
01:11:01,735 --> 01:11:04,347
[ Grunts ]
1102
01:11:12,833 --> 01:11:16,576
[ Man on P.A. ] Attention, honey whitlock look-alikes.
1103
01:11:16,620 --> 01:11:19,884
Please come to the concession stand at the end of the film...
1104
01:11:19,927 --> 01:11:22,713
To show your fellow drive-in fans your costumes...
1105
01:11:22,756 --> 01:11:25,411
And maybe take home a grand prize...
1106
01:11:25,455 --> 01:11:29,676
Of a ten-pound Smithfield ham.
1107
01:11:29,720 --> 01:11:33,114
We also feature sodas, burgers,
1108
01:11:33,158 --> 01:11:35,465
hot dogs, popcorn...
1109
01:11:35,508 --> 01:11:37,902
And the candy of your choice.
1110
01:11:37,945 --> 01:11:40,992
All right here at the bengie's drive-in theater,
1111
01:11:41,035 --> 01:11:43,037
where tonight,
1112
01:11:43,081 --> 01:11:46,824
honey whitlock is on the screen all night long.
1113
01:11:48,173 --> 01:11:49,914
[ Grunting ]
1114
01:11:51,481 --> 01:11:53,570
[ Phone ringing ]Oh, my god.
1115
01:11:55,789 --> 01:11:58,270
The greatest director
of all time !
1116
01:12:03,536 --> 01:12:06,452
[ Man ] Come on. You didn't know.
1117
01:12:06,496 --> 01:12:08,454
You have cinematic
immunity now.
1118
01:12:08,498 --> 01:12:10,543
Yeah, none
of your old movies count.
1119
01:12:15,026 --> 01:12:18,551
That's not you on the screen. It's somebody else. Come on.
1120
01:12:22,468 --> 01:12:24,514
- [ Banging at door ]
- Who is it ?
1121
01:12:24,557 --> 01:12:27,647
Cecil b. Demented.
1122
01:12:27,691 --> 01:12:31,608
Oh, right.
That's really funny, asshole.
1123
01:12:33,784 --> 01:12:36,221
[ Gasps ]
1124
01:12:38,963 --> 01:12:41,182
[ Muffled shouting ]
1125
01:12:41,226 --> 01:12:44,011
[ Cat meowing ]
1126
01:12:44,055 --> 01:12:46,666
Kill the bitch !she never could act !
1127
01:12:46,710 --> 01:12:48,668
Her career is over !hey !
1128
01:12:48,712 --> 01:12:52,280
No. Hey, bad reviews
can't hurt me now.
1129
01:12:52,324 --> 01:12:54,370
Yeah. We're beyond
the critics' reach.
1130
01:12:54,413 --> 01:12:56,850
Who cares what anybody thinks
about our movie ?
1131
01:12:56,894 --> 01:12:59,462
Except Satan. [ Man ]
Shut up, bitch !
1132
01:12:59,505 --> 01:13:01,464
[ Screaming ]
1133
01:13:03,988 --> 01:13:05,816
[ Man ] Hey, what's going on ? [ Chattering, horns honking ]
1134
01:13:05,859 --> 01:13:08,558
Hello.
1135
01:13:08,601 --> 01:13:10,821
This is Cecil b. Demented,
1136
01:13:10,864 --> 01:13:14,955
[ chattering continues ] Speaking to you directly from this theater.
1137
01:13:14,999 --> 01:13:19,133
[ Applause ]I want you all
to be in my new movie.
1138
01:13:19,177 --> 01:13:21,919
[ Cheering, applause ] It is calledraving beauty.
1139
01:13:21,962 --> 01:13:26,097
We are shooting the final scene here tonight.
1140
01:13:26,140 --> 01:13:29,230
I wish Cecil would kill
some more assholes.
1141
01:13:29,274 --> 01:13:32,756
Yeah, like those phony critics
who give all good reviews
in the movie ads.
1142
01:13:32,799 --> 01:13:35,193
Or those last-minute
fuck-head ticket buyers...
1143
01:13:35,236 --> 01:13:37,674
Who enter the theater after
the feature's begun.
1144
01:13:37,717 --> 01:13:40,285
Join the revolution against Hollywood movies. [ Sirens wailing ]
1145
01:13:40,328 --> 01:13:43,636
Bring cinema wars home to theaters in your neighborhood...
1146
01:13:43,680 --> 01:13:47,335
And punish those who stand in the way ofyour kind of entertainment.
1147
01:13:47,379 --> 01:13:49,599
Cinema hoodlums,
1148
01:13:49,642 --> 01:13:51,731
you can destroy commercial cinema as we know it.
1149
01:13:51,775 --> 01:13:54,473
Burn down the multiplexes.
1150
01:13:54,517 --> 01:13:57,433
Stop the mass-distribution of mediocre movies !
1151
01:13:57,476 --> 01:13:59,913
This is a warning to all cinemagoers.
1152
01:13:59,957 --> 01:14:03,526
Mainstream movie fans, we will Bury you.
1153
01:14:03,569 --> 01:14:07,573
Cecil b. Demented,
you are surrounded.
1154
01:14:07,617 --> 01:14:10,707
Give yourself up
and you and your cast and crew
will not be injured.
1155
01:14:10,750 --> 01:14:14,711
Pay no attention
to the studio executives
in the police vehicle.
1156
01:14:14,754 --> 01:14:16,713
[ Crew ]
Yeah, yeah. Tell them.
1157
01:14:16,756 --> 01:14:20,325
- I have final cut !
- We are not studio executives.
1158
01:14:20,368 --> 01:14:22,327
We are the Baltimore city
police department.
1159
01:14:24,068 --> 01:14:26,505
[ Man on loudspeaker ]
Fidget, we know you're here.
1160
01:14:26,549 --> 01:14:29,377
We heard it on the news.
Come home, son.
1161
01:14:29,421 --> 01:14:32,816
Fans of outlaw cinema,
1162
01:14:32,859 --> 01:14:35,775
they want to use you
for market testing.
1163
01:14:35,819 --> 01:14:40,171
- [ Crew ] Yeah !
- They want to detain you
and put you in focus groups.
1164
01:14:40,214 --> 01:14:42,347
Uh-huh ![ Together ]
that's right ! That's right !
1165
01:14:42,390 --> 01:14:44,523
But I won't let them,
1166
01:14:44,567 --> 01:14:47,526
because I don't believe in
phony life-affirming endings !
1167
01:14:47,570 --> 01:14:50,007
I would rather die
than change my movie !
1168
01:14:50,050 --> 01:14:53,401
Waco ! Waco !
1169
01:14:53,445 --> 01:14:55,752
[ Cecil ] That's it.
1170
01:14:55,795 --> 01:14:58,537
[ Grunts ]
1171
01:14:58,581 --> 01:15:01,279
Fidget, it's your dad.
1172
01:15:01,322 --> 01:15:03,281
We're here with a psychiatrist.
1173
01:15:03,324 --> 01:15:06,197
He specializes
in children like you.
1174
01:15:06,240 --> 01:15:09,374
Everything's gonna be okay, son.
1175
01:15:09,417 --> 01:15:11,594
Fidget, it's mommy.
1176
01:15:11,637 --> 01:15:14,466
We know you've seen too many r-rated movies,
1177
01:15:14,510 --> 01:15:16,468
and we're here to help.
1178
01:15:16,512 --> 01:15:18,557
[ Officer ] Cecil b. Demented, your parents are here.
1179
01:15:18,601 --> 01:15:20,559
And they would like to speak to you.
1180
01:15:20,603 --> 01:15:23,344
- Sinclair, it's your father.
- [ Groans ]
1181
01:15:23,388 --> 01:15:26,826
God !
[ Grunting ]
1182
01:15:26,870 --> 01:15:30,308
Thomas alva Edison
is the only father
I've ever had !
1183
01:15:30,351 --> 01:15:33,354
I know you're sick in the head,
but whatever made you think
you could direct ?
1184
01:15:33,398 --> 01:15:35,400
[ All chattering at once ]
1185
01:15:35,443 --> 01:15:37,141
[ Raven ] You can direct, Cecil. Don't listen to that Christian !
1186
01:15:38,577 --> 01:15:42,755
- Sinclair, it's mom.
- Oh !
1187
01:15:42,799 --> 01:15:46,585
Repeat after me.
It's only a movie.
1188
01:15:46,629 --> 01:15:49,022
[ Grunting ] It's only a movie.
1189
01:15:49,066 --> 01:15:52,504
It's only a movie.Picture's up !
1190
01:15:52,548 --> 01:15:54,593
[ Raven ]
All right !
1191
01:15:54,637 --> 01:15:57,378
[ Feedback ]Cecil.
1192
01:15:57,422 --> 01:15:59,729
- Are you okay ?
- Oh, shit.
1193
01:15:59,772 --> 01:16:01,774
[ Man ]
Come on, Cecil.
We got to finish the movie.
1194
01:16:01,818 --> 01:16:03,733
Come on.
Get up. Come on.
1195
01:16:03,776 --> 01:16:06,039
Come on.
Get up, Cecil.
1196
01:16:06,083 --> 01:16:08,085
Honey whitlock
is here tonight,
1197
01:16:08,128 --> 01:16:10,740
[ cheering ] Live and in person.
1198
01:16:10,783 --> 01:16:13,177
And she's dyin' to meet ya.
1199
01:16:13,220 --> 01:16:15,919
Come on ! Move out !
Go ! Go ! Let's go !
1200
01:16:15,962 --> 01:16:17,703
[ Cheering continues ]
1201
01:16:19,836 --> 01:16:22,273
[ Grunting continues ]
1202
01:16:22,316 --> 01:16:25,493
[ Cheering ]
Yeah !
1203
01:16:41,466 --> 01:16:43,686
You can make it.
1204
01:16:43,729 --> 01:16:45,818
Just one more camera setup,
then we can have sex.
1205
01:16:47,515 --> 01:16:51,215
Honey, honey, honey.
1206
01:16:51,258 --> 01:16:54,784
I've had a final vision.
1207
01:16:54,827 --> 01:16:57,700
Would you set your hair on fire
for our movie ?
1208
01:17:00,180 --> 01:17:03,140
My real hair ?
1209
01:17:03,183 --> 01:17:05,533
[ Grunting ]
1210
01:17:05,577 --> 01:17:10,538
Prove yourself one more time,
for your cast.
1211
01:17:12,976 --> 01:17:17,154
Your crew.
They've given up their lives
for this film,
1212
01:17:17,197 --> 01:17:19,286
and they carry the eternal flame of cinema insanity.
1213
01:17:19,330 --> 01:17:21,071
Do it.
1214
01:17:21,114 --> 01:17:24,857
Your fans--
they love the new honey.
1215
01:17:24,901 --> 01:17:28,208
[ Cheering continues ] They love her so much.
1216
01:17:28,252 --> 01:17:31,821
And for me--
Cecil b. Demented.
1217
01:17:39,219 --> 01:17:41,221
[ Cheering continues ]
1218
01:17:55,932 --> 01:17:59,936
I'm ready for my close-up,
Mr. Demented.
1219
01:17:59,979 --> 01:18:02,025
[ Officer ] Cecil b. Demented, you have 60 seconds.
1220
01:18:02,068 --> 01:18:04,114
Picture's up !
1221
01:18:04,157 --> 01:18:07,944
Abandon your film or we will shoot to kill !
1222
01:18:07,987 --> 01:18:10,642
Camera rolling !
Speed !
1223
01:18:10,686 --> 01:18:13,514
And... action !
1224
01:18:13,558 --> 01:18:16,300
[ Cheering continues ]
1225
01:18:16,343 --> 01:18:19,999
Cellulunatics
and cinema survivalists !
1226
01:18:24,656 --> 01:18:26,789
Make good movies or die !
1227
01:18:29,443 --> 01:18:31,402
Wow !
1228
01:18:33,317 --> 01:18:35,580
[ Siren wailing ]
1229
01:18:38,148 --> 01:18:40,454
Cut, cut, cut !
1230
01:18:44,110 --> 01:18:47,635
That, fellow sprocket holes, is a wrap !
1231
01:18:47,679 --> 01:18:50,334
- [ Grunts ]
- [ Crowd screaming ]
1232
01:18:50,377 --> 01:18:52,336
Principal photography
has been completed !
1233
01:18:52,379 --> 01:18:55,948
- You mean we can fuck ?
- From here to timbuktu !
1234
01:18:56,949 --> 01:18:59,560
Oh, yes !
1235
01:19:04,043 --> 01:19:05,958
[ Pop ][ Both moaning ]
1236
01:19:06,002 --> 01:19:08,613
[ Whooping ]
1237
01:19:08,656 --> 01:19:10,833
Honey !
1238
01:19:14,184 --> 01:19:17,622
[ Man ] Raven, I love you ! I love all satanists ! Pick me !
1239
01:19:17,665 --> 01:19:21,147
Honey ! Oh ! Ah !
1240
01:19:21,191 --> 01:19:22,932
[ Grunting ]
1241
01:19:36,032 --> 01:19:39,209
You picked me.Yeah.
1242
01:19:40,210 --> 01:19:42,168
Get up here !
1243
01:19:48,740 --> 01:19:51,482
[ Moaning ]
1244
01:19:57,531 --> 01:19:59,446
Okay.
[ Moans ]
1245
01:19:59,490 --> 01:20:02,623
[ Whimpering ]
1246
01:20:02,667 --> 01:20:05,365
[ Moaning continues ]
1247
01:20:05,409 --> 01:20:07,933
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
1248
01:20:09,805 --> 01:20:11,415
[ Moaning continues ]
1249
01:20:14,331 --> 01:20:16,159
[ Lewis ] Yeah, yeah, yeah.[ Moaning intensifies ]
1250
01:20:22,818 --> 01:20:26,734
- Hi, mom !
- [ Moaning continues ]
1251
01:20:34,742 --> 01:20:36,048
[ Sirens continue ]
1252
01:20:36,092 --> 01:20:38,355
[ Pop ]
1253
01:20:38,398 --> 01:20:40,313
Oh, my god !
[ Screaming ]
1254
01:20:40,357 --> 01:20:44,404
Oh, shit ! Come on !
1255
01:20:44,448 --> 01:20:46,102
[ Sirens, shouting continue ]
1256
01:20:46,145 --> 01:20:49,192
[ Grunts ]
1257
01:20:54,371 --> 01:20:56,764
[ Both yell ]
1258
01:20:56,808 --> 01:20:59,419
[ Chardonnay ]
Get the film !i got it !
1259
01:21:02,292 --> 01:21:06,209
[ Grunting ] [ Crowd shouting ] Cecil ! Cecil !
1260
01:21:06,252 --> 01:21:08,254
- Honey !
- What ?
1261
01:21:09,995 --> 01:21:13,303
I seen what you did,
you Hollywood bitch !
1262
01:21:13,346 --> 01:21:17,394
Maybe you can get away with this shit in California, but we're in Maryland now.
1263
01:21:17,437 --> 01:21:20,223
You're under arrest,
honey whitlock.
1264
01:21:20,266 --> 01:21:22,703
[ Honey ]
Cecil !
1265
01:21:25,663 --> 01:21:28,187
I have...
1266
01:21:28,231 --> 01:21:32,539
A vision !
1267
01:21:32,583 --> 01:21:36,369
[ Chair crashes ][ Both gasping ]
1268
01:21:36,413 --> 01:21:39,982
[ Chattering ]
1269
01:21:40,025 --> 01:21:44,508
[ Man ] Oh, god !well, that's what you get.
1270
01:21:44,551 --> 01:21:46,727
[ Fidget's mom on loudspeaker ]
Fidget, we're leaving.
1271
01:21:46,771 --> 01:21:49,339
How much is a mother
supposed to take ?
1272
01:21:49,382 --> 01:21:52,995
Fucker !
Son of a bitch !
1273
01:21:53,038 --> 01:21:55,432
[ Grunts ]Good-bye, petie !
1274
01:21:55,475 --> 01:21:58,478
I'll visit you
in prison, man ![ Hooting ]
1275
01:21:58,522 --> 01:22:01,481
We got the footage, baby ![ Chardonnay ]
anybody got a cell phone ?
1276
01:22:01,525 --> 01:22:03,440
Call 20/20.Get me an agent ! Go, go !
1277
01:22:03,483 --> 01:22:06,312
[ Cheering ]
Honey ! Honey !thank you, thank you !
1278
01:22:06,356 --> 01:22:09,315
Miss whitlock, you're under arrest ! Hands in the air. Show's over.
1279
01:22:09,359 --> 01:22:11,013
[ Raven ]
Honey, it's okay.
We finished the film !
1280
01:22:15,234 --> 01:22:17,236
Hail Satan !
1281
01:22:28,160 --> 01:22:31,294
[ Screams ]
Ow !
1282
01:22:32,338 --> 01:22:35,472
Oh, hi, mom.
1283
01:22:35,515 --> 01:22:37,474
Hey, dad.
1284
01:22:38,823 --> 01:22:43,523
[ Chattering continues ][ Woman ]
honey !
1285
01:22:43,567 --> 01:22:46,874
♪ Never say good-bye say ciao ♪
1286
01:22:49,138 --> 01:22:51,314
♪ till we meet again
1287
01:22:51,357 --> 01:22:55,361
♪ say ciao
1288
01:22:55,405 --> 01:22:58,451
♪ time will disappear
1289
01:22:58,495 --> 01:23:00,758
♪ so hold me near
1290
01:23:00,801 --> 01:23:03,848
♪ and never say good-bye
1291
01:23:03,891 --> 01:23:05,632
♪ say ciao
1292
01:23:10,072 --> 01:23:13,118
♪ please don't shed a tear
1293
01:23:13,162 --> 01:23:15,164
♪ say ciao
1294
01:23:16,904 --> 01:23:20,908
♪ you'll be always near somehow ♪
1295
01:23:23,433 --> 01:23:26,436
♪ time will disappear
1296
01:23:26,479 --> 01:23:29,221
♪ so smile, my dear
1297
01:23:29,265 --> 01:23:34,009
♪ and never say good-bye say ciao ♪
1298
01:23:38,665 --> 01:23:41,451
♪ no, never say good-bye
1299
01:23:41,494 --> 01:23:46,151
♪ say ciao ♪
1300
01:23:46,195 --> 01:23:48,371
[ Woman ] Chow.
1301
01:23:48,414 --> 01:23:50,677
♪♪ [ Heavy metal ]
1302
01:23:50,721 --> 01:23:55,639
♪ Chow
1303
01:23:55,682 --> 01:23:57,945
♪♪ [ woman wailing ]
1304
01:23:57,989 --> 01:23:59,643
♪ Chow, chow, chow, chow, chow chow, chow, chow, chow ♪
1305
01:23:59,686 --> 01:24:02,820
♪ chow, chow, chow
1306
01:24:02,863 --> 01:24:04,604
♪♪ [ wailing continues ]
1307
01:24:07,781 --> 01:24:10,523
♪♪ [ Continues ] ♪ chow, chow, chow, chow, chow
1308
01:25:18,417 --> 01:25:20,419
♪♪ [ Hip-hop ]
1309
01:25:22,421 --> 01:25:24,510
♪ We ain't got no budget ♪ no budget
1310
01:25:24,554 --> 01:25:27,034
♪ no craft service, man ♪ no budget
1311
01:25:27,078 --> 01:25:29,080
♪ we don't take no notes ♪ no budget
1312
01:25:29,124 --> 01:25:31,387
♪ no fuckin' call sheets, yo ♪ no budget
1313
01:25:31,430 --> 01:25:33,606
♪ we ain't recoupin' shit ♪ no budget
1314
01:25:33,650 --> 01:25:36,043
♪ yeah, we got a start date for real ♪ ♪ no budget
1315
01:25:36,087 --> 01:25:38,394
♪ yo, this picture's a go ♪ no budget
1316
01:25:38,437 --> 01:25:40,700
♪ and we gonna turn Hollywood out ♪ ♪ no budget
1317
01:25:40,744 --> 01:25:42,876
♪ how the fuck you think you're just gonna charge me rent ♪
1318
01:25:42,920 --> 01:25:45,009
♪ don't need the help of so-called critics ♪
1319
01:25:45,052 --> 01:25:47,316
♪ outlaw cinema with the hottest gunslingers ♪
1320
01:25:47,359 --> 01:25:50,667
♪ when we say action cameras roll, before your deal
is fuckin' asshole clean ♪
1321
01:25:50,710 --> 01:25:53,365
♪ if I direct, ain't gonna be no motherfuckin' scenes ♪
1322
01:25:53,409 --> 01:25:56,281
♪ we'll do the edits take the credits ♪
1323
01:25:56,325 --> 01:25:59,110
♪ it's our way or nobody's fuck keeping it clean, ha ♪
1324
01:25:59,154 --> 01:26:01,112
♪ we ain't got no budget ♪ no budget
1325
01:26:01,156 --> 01:26:03,593
♪ no craft service, man ♪ no budget
1326
01:26:03,636 --> 01:26:05,638
♪ we don't take no notes ♪ no budget
1327
01:26:05,682 --> 01:26:07,640
♪ no fuckin' call sheets, yo ♪ no budget
1328
01:26:07,684 --> 01:26:09,642
♪ we ain't recoupin' shit ♪ no budget
1329
01:26:09,686 --> 01:26:11,644
♪ yeah, we got a start date for real ♪ ♪ no budget
1330
01:26:11,688 --> 01:26:14,995
♪ yo, this picture's a go ♪ no budget
1331
01:26:15,039 --> 01:26:17,128
♪ and we gonna turn Hollywood out ♪ ♪ no budget
1332
01:26:17,172 --> 01:26:19,783
♪ no focus through my camera lens ♪
1333
01:26:19,826 --> 01:26:21,959
♪ picture perfect you think it's perfect ♪
1334
01:26:22,002 --> 01:26:24,222
♪ I'll second that fuckin' emotion ♪
1335
01:26:24,266 --> 01:26:27,138
♪ I'm with the team what you think ♪
1336
01:26:27,182 --> 01:26:29,140
♪ shit, motherfucker with the fuckers you need ♪
1337
01:26:29,184 --> 01:26:31,055
♪ no budget bitches, drop your motherfuckin' knees ♪
1338
01:26:31,098 --> 01:26:33,405
♪ I'm sick of spitting on these so-called deeds ♪
1339
01:26:33,449 --> 01:26:35,668
♪ then they walkin' up to Cecil petty bitches, bite me ♪
1340
01:26:35,712 --> 01:26:38,018
♪ we ain't got no budget ♪ no budget
1341
01:26:38,062 --> 01:26:40,020
♪ ain't nobody puttin' us in turnaround ♪
1342
01:26:40,064 --> 01:26:42,458
♪ we don't take no notes ♪ no budget
1343
01:26:42,501 --> 01:26:44,547
♪ we'll do the edits take the credits ♪
1344
01:26:44,590 --> 01:26:46,984
♪ we ain't recoupin' shit ♪ no budget
1345
01:26:47,027 --> 01:26:49,029
♪ you got that, motherfucker
1346
01:26:49,073 --> 01:26:51,293
♪ yo, this picture's a go ♪ no budget
1347
01:26:53,817 --> 01:26:55,601
♪ we ain't got no budget ♪ no budget
1348
01:26:55,645 --> 01:26:58,387
[ woman laughing ] ♪ no budget
1349
01:26:58,430 --> 01:27:01,085
♪ we don't take no notes ♪ no budget
1350
01:27:01,128 --> 01:27:03,087
♪ fuck keeping it clean ♪ no budget
1351
01:27:03,130 --> 01:27:05,481
♪ we ain't recoupin' shit ♪ no budget
1352
01:27:05,524 --> 01:27:07,483
♪ petty bitches, bite me ♪ no budget
1353
01:27:07,526 --> 01:27:09,528
♪ yo, this picture's a go ♪ no budget
1354
01:27:09,572 --> 01:27:12,227
♪ when we say action cameras roll ♪ ♪ no budget
1355
01:27:12,270 --> 01:27:14,229
♪ we ain't got no budget ♪ no budget
1356
01:27:14,272 --> 01:27:16,840
♪ ain't nobody puttin' us in turnaround ♪
1357
01:27:16,883 --> 01:27:18,842
♪ we don't take no notes ♪ no budget
1358
01:27:18,885 --> 01:27:21,148
♪ we'll do the edits take the credits ♪
1359
01:27:21,192 --> 01:27:23,629
♪ we ain't recoupin' shit ♪ no budget
1360
01:27:23,673 --> 01:27:25,718
♪ you got that, motherfucker
1361
01:27:25,762 --> 01:27:27,677
♪ yo, this picture's a go ♪ no budget
1362
01:27:30,462 --> 01:27:32,551
♪ we ain't got no budget
1363
01:27:32,595 --> 01:27:34,814
♪ no craft service, man
1364
01:27:34,858 --> 01:27:37,034
♪ we don't take no notes
1365
01:27:37,077 --> 01:27:39,297
♪ no fuckin' call sheets, yo ♪
1366
01:27:39,341 --> 01:27:43,432
Closed-captioned by
captions, inc. Los Angeles
106480
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