Original subtitles

PHOEBE (over P.A.): Piper, did you check on the cake?

Yes.

That's good,

because I don't want the cake to be delivered

till after the linens arrive.

I checked on the cake.

Could you please take off that microphone?

Yeah.

Sorry, I'm just...

( loudly): checking the sound system.

( chuckles): Okay...

What about the limo?

Honey, did you book the limo?

It's all taken care of.

Along with the DJ, the caterer,

the table arrangements,

and the rice.

Rice?

No, no, no.

We can't throw rice.

Why not?

Well, because the birds can't digest it,

and they will blow up.

Okay, so we'll throw bird seed,

or we'll release balloons.

No, no, we can't release balloons either,

they float to the ocean,

and the whales mistake them for squid,

and I can't be thinking about

wales washing up on the beach during my wedding,

you know what I mean?

Honey, I know you want the perfect day,

but you need to relax a little bit and breathe.

Breathing is good.

Breathing is your friend.

Whoa...

Is this a wedding or a coronation?

Um?

Where is my dress?

Oh, I don't have it.

( gasping)

I'm not breathing.

What do you mean... how could you

forget my dress the day before the wedding?

The bridal shop is closed tomorrow.

Relax, it's open tonight,

I'm planning on picking it up on my way

to the rehearsal dinner.

Oh... All right.

Why don't we sit down?

Yeah, sitting is good

I think I'm a little stressed out

You know, 'cause I just...

I want tomorrow to be perfect.

No glitches, natural or supernatural,

you know?

No magic,

no ghosts...

( loudly): You guys understand that?

I just want tomorrow to be nice and normal.

Honey?

I promise you will have your perfect wedding

By this time tomorrow,

you and Cole will be joined in holy matrimony.

Holy matrimony will be the worst possible thing

that could happen.

It'll keep you from ever reigning as the Source.

That can't be right.

It's what I foresee.

Unless, of course, you cancel the wedding.

I can't.

I need Phoebe.

Yes, I can see that, too.

( sighs)

We've been through this.

Cole's love for Phoebe still exists within me,

I can't overcome it.

If I'm to regain what I've lost,

it has to be with Phoebe.

Marrying her.

Even if it means losing your son?

A son?

You saw a son in my future?

More than a son.

You and Phoebe Halliwell will produce

the most powerful child the magical world has ever seen.

Mm...

That's my boy.

No, he won't be your boy.

He'll be theirs... On the side of good.

Unless you marry the witch in a dark way.

Well, that's impossible; the wedding's tomorrow.

I don't have time.

Then your son will never be heir to your kingdom,

he'll be heir to their destiny.

Not if I destroy the white wedding.

Then find a way to lure her into a dark one.

I'll have to move quickly.

Start a fight between Phoebe and one of her sisters...

Paige.

Do you really think

sibling rivalry is going to...

Not by itself, no.

I'll have to get a demon to attack, to distract them.

While you're doing that,

I'll set Paige up...

mix a potion or two to incite the in-fighting,

then... poof... watch the white wedding disappear, literally.

Still, how will you get her to marry you in the dark way?

What do I need for that?

A Dark Priest to perform the ceremony,

at night, in a cemetery.

And, of course, the groom will have to drink her blood.

What are the chances of that?

Good.

Very good.

♪ I am the son and the heir ♪

♪ I am human and I need to be loved ♪

♪ Just like everybody else does ♪

♪ See, I've already waited too long ♪

♪ And all my hope is gone. ♪

( talking and laughing)

PIPER: And what about Phoebe,

who was speed-walking down the aisle?

I was not!

You left your Dad!

Twice.

Okay, attention.

I have something for my groomsmen,

two fine gentlemen I chose to stand by me

on the most important day of my life

because, uh, well, they're the only ones I know.

LEO: Well, you have

to admire his honesty.

(laughing)

Here you go.

Thanks.

Wow. Cool.

Engraved golf balls.

Titleist Pro V Ones

Thanks, man.

I... don't golf.

Hey, I'll take 'em.

Well, they got my name on it.

So?

(guests chuckling)

And for my two beautiful bridesmaids...

whom I chose because they're my best friends

in the whole wide world.

Oh, Phoebe?

There's a bonsai tree for balance and harmony,

and a dream-catcher

so that all your dreams will come true

just like mine have.

This is so great!

Tarot cards.

My deck is totally trashed. This is perfect.

Yeah,

that's just in case you need psychic services

while me and my new husband are busy getting busy.

(phone rings)

Oh. Oh. I hope that's the photographer.

Hey, Leo, I got an extra stogie. You want to join me?

No, I don't smoke.

I'll take that.

But I do eat chocolate.

Leo.

No, wait, wait, wait.

No. No! Leo.

You need to wait for everybody else.

Let's see what the future has in store

for Cole and Phoebe.

Oh...

Oh, no.

COLE: You don't really believe

that stuff, do you?

PHOEBE: All right.

Oh, I am so sorry.

There's just so many details, you know.

I practically bit Paige's head off today at the church

because she didn't pick up my dress

on time.

Which is now in the attic.

PHOEBE: Yay.

Excuse me.

I'll be right back.

So what did the cards say?

Oh. Nothing.

Try the cards again,

and see what comes up.

Oh... maybe later.

COLE: So...

I don't mean to spoil everyone's fun, but, uh...

I should be going.

LEO: Going where?

Hotel.

Not supposed to stay in the same house as my bride

the night before the wedding, right?

But Phoebe has the number

in case of emergency. Good night.

See you later.

So what are you gonna do your last night as a single guy?

Ooh, if I told you that, you'd never marry me.

I feel like I'm standing at the edge of a cliff right now.

You do?

Yeah,

and somehow I've never felt safer in my whole life.

Are you okay?

No.

Not really.

You have no idea how difficult you're making this for me.

I do...

but you have to go.

You'll have me soon enough.

I hope so.

(debris clattering)

I saw some witches poking around this crypt one night,

a couple or three years back.

I think this is where they buried it.

I can always count on you to help.

Well,

you're one of the few left.

The Dark Priesthood's a lonely calling these days

I haven't seen a human soul in my collection plate in months.

I'll be sure to make a donation.

Bless you, child.

You know...

it's not a wise move to unearth a Lazarus demon.

They're mean and unreliable...

A bad combination.

I know.

It's just that after you kill one,

you have to bury the remains to prevent resurrection.

Yes, I know.

Well, what I want to know is what's a wise old seer want

with one of these messy creatures?

That's my concern.

Don't you mean the Source's concern?

I've heard the rumors.

A new Source has arisen.

And lucky to have you as his Seer.

Still, you've always worked

in a strictly advisory capacity,

and yet, here you are, digging up demons.

So? So.

What's in it for you?

I had a vision

This Source will have a son;

the greatest power in the history of magic.

And you'll be the hand that rocks his cradle.

Once I get rid of his mother... yes.

Very nice.

Tell the new Source

I live to serve him.

( phone rings)

Hello.

I had to call. It's an emergency.

Phoebe, what is it?

I needed to hear your voice.

I'm glad you called.

You are?

Yeah.

Uh, something's been bothering me.

Maybe it's my imagination, but, uh, Paige was a little...

I don't know, weird at dinner, kind of cold.

Really? I didn't notice.

Uh, I wouldn't bring it up,

but I don't want to do anything

to come between you and your sister.

If us getting married is gonna hurt the Power of Three

in any way...

I don't know what to say.

Except Paige has been nothing but supportive of our marriage.

Forget about it.

It's probably nothing.

Okay.

So, how do you look in your wedding gown?

I don't know yet.

I've been too busy to try it on.

Well, when you do, I want you to picture me taking it off.

( knock on door)

Got to go, babe.

Love you.

I love y... ( dial tone)

you.

Hey! ( laughter)

What is a wedding without a bachelor party?

I got poker chips, corn chips.

I have chips.

I got the entertainment.

From my private collection, I might add.

You wouldn't happen to have the, uh,

key to the mini-bar, there, would you?

( laughter)

What does the future have in store for Phoebe and Cole?

Oh!

( knock at door)

Piper!

Hmm?

Look, I can't keep this to myself any longer.

This is Phoebe and Cole's tarot reading.

They were lovers in their past.

Despair fills their present.

But this...

is their future.

Oh, please!

This looks nothing like death.

Prue met him. I know.

No, you're missing the point.

This is a bad omen.

Well, not necessarily.

Look, Cole's a nice guy, fine, whatever, but face the facts.

He was the world's greatest demon for what, a century?

Yeah, but we've been through that.

Yeah, I know.

But a century's worth of blood and bad karma...

You don't just walk away from that.

( sighs): God, I don't know.

Maybe I'm just... worried.

Well, have you ever

considered that maybe you drew those cards

because they represent your feelings and not Phoebe's

future?

That's a possibility.

( loud female scream)

( panting and groaning)

( grunting)

You!

PIPER: Oh. You ruined

my wedding, and the bridal shop is closed tomorrow!

PIPER: Now, uh,

Phoebe, let's not blow this out of proportion.

My wedding dress could double as a circus tent!

Okay, I think things are already out of proportion!

PAIGE: All I did was

pick up the dress!

The wrong dress!

No, I checked the tag.

Oh, really?

Let me just look at that.

Millie Platt.

Do I look like

Millie Platt to you? Do I?!

That's impossible.

Okay. You know

if you would have picked up the dress when I asked,

we'd have time to fix this.

Don't worry. I can sew.

I will take in the seams...

All of them... tonight.

( gasps)

( gasps and grunts)

( yells)

( groans)

( glass breaking)

Sword!

( grunting)

( groans)

( sighs)

You'd better take care of this mess!

There's got to be something about this

in The Book of Shadows.

Not the demon. My wedding dress!

Are you hurt?

Baby, you're not supposed to be here.

Oh, Leo said it was an urgent call.

I was worried.

Thanks, I'm fine.

No demon is gonna stop me from marrying you tomorrow.

Now, my sister is another story.

I said I was sorry.

What kind of demon attacked here? This one.

Lazarus demon?

A Lazarus demon? You sure?

"Rare, high-level demons

with telekinetic powers."

Yup, that's the bad boy we popped.

Has it resurrected yet?

Resurrected?

PAIGE: Behind you!

Sofa! ( grunts)

( grunts) No!

Piper, blow him up!

Leo!

( Phoebe groans)

Are you okay?

I think so, yeah.

Uh, he's gonna be back.

The Book says that Lazarus demons get stronger

the longer they are out of cemetery ground.

Cemetery ground? It's the only way

to keep them from resurrecting...

You bury them. So that means

someone intentionally dug him up...

to attack us, the night before my wedding.

LEO: Yeah, the question is

who and why?

PAIGE: I know why.

To stop the wedding.

I did two tarot readings, Phoebe.

They both said that marrying Cole would only cause

death and despair.

What? Well, I'm surprised

he didn't tell you... He saw the first reading.

Well, if I ran scared every time things looked dark for us,

we'd never have made it this far.

That's true.

Is there anything else bothering you Paige,

that I should know about?

No, not really.

PIPER: Okay, good.

Paige and I

will be on demon watch tonight

so that Phoebe can get some sleep.

( groans): I'm too wired to sleep.

Well, maybe I can help you relax with one

of my aromatherapy treatments.

PIPER: See? Now, this is the spirit.

Everything will be fine, as long as we stay together,

and stay calm.

( Paige inhales, exhales)

( yells)

I just did what the Seer told me!

Did she tell you to kill my fiancee?

Because that's what you almost did.

The Source before you would have rewarded me

for killing one of those witches.

The old Source was reckless.

And now he's dead.

You want to follow him to his grave?

No.

Then let's get this straight.

You work for me now.

Do what I tell you, I guarantee you'll never see

another cemetery.

But...

hurt my bride again, and I will bury you myself.

( grunts)

And stay down until I need you.

How dare you unearth a Lazarus demon.

We need a creature that can lure your witch into the cemetery.

But a Lazarus demon? The witches must believe

they are under attack for your plan to work.

There's no plan with Phoebe dead.

I'm beginning to wonder if you can handle your new mantle of power.

Are you questioning my leadership?

No. You inherited the world's evil...

I'll follow that anywhere.

But?

Cole, he's still alive inside you,

and he loves the witch.

I know.

I can feel it.

When you were a demon,

his love for her ruined more than one good plan.

It's different now.

Cole's voice used to scream inside my head.

Now it's just a whisper.

We can use his feelings to control her.

So we'll take shifts, and I will go first,

and then Paige will wake you up in the morning.

What is this?

My face cream.

Also known as Heaven in a Jar.

It's a special blend. You made it?

Mm-hmm. It's got patchouli oil for balance and confidence,

and chamomile to relax your nervous system.

I'm really sorry

about your wedding dress.

I want everything to go so great for you tomorrow.

Mm. It's okay.

She is trying. Yeah, I know, I know.

Couldn't hurt, right?

( chuckles)

You still feeling tense?

Not really tense, just, um...

extremely alert.

Phoebe, I know you want this Cinderella fantasy,

but I don't want you to be upset

if everything doesn't go exactly as planned tomorrow.

Where is that coming from? Well, I was just remembering

my wedding day,

and I remember I wanted everything

to be absolutely perfect...

And then Prue crashed through the front door

on a Harley! Yeah,

Only Prue could make my wedding day

all about her. Mm-hmm.

But the point is,

I barely remember the ceremony.

It's a total blur.

And in the end, all that matters

is that you marry the guy that you love.

And if you manage to do that,

your wedding was perfect.

Summum supplicium

diabolus infernum

( faint murmuring)

Nebocatia becata...

( faint murmuring)

What are you doing in here?

Shh.

Just checking on Phoebe,

you were in the bathroom.

I didn't even hear you.

Well, that's a problem, don't you think?

What if I was a demon?

Oh, good point.

When you're on demon watch in this house,

you don't take bathroom breaks.

Got it.

And whatever you do, don't fall asleep.

Paige!

Paige.

You were supposed to wake me up.

What happened? What time is it?

( screams)

Look at me.

Whoa.

What do you have to say for yourself?

I fixed your wedding dress?

( sighs heavily)

Paige!

This is all your fault.

You put a mojo on my face cream.

I did not!

Those are all natural ingredients.

If you had something to say to me,

why didn't you just say it, Paige?

Okay, we all just

need to take a deep breath...

Say what?

Don't think that I don't know

how you really feel about Cole.

I have been nothing but supportive of that demon.

Ex-demon.

Oh, is that like ex-convict?

All right,

that is not necessary.

We all just need to calm down...

Face it, Phoebe, this wedding has been filled

with nothing but bad omens

from the start. And they all seem to be

connected with you now, don't they?

All right, that's it!

Break it up.

You go to your corner

and you, you're gonna get ready.

And we're gonna put lots and lots of makeup on you.

Oh, face it, there's not enough spackle

in the world to fill those craters.

Step back.

Oh! Now what are you doing?

Trying to prove to you

that I am not trying to sabotage your wedding.

I don't think... "Let the object of objection become but a dream,

as I cause the seen to be unseen."

Magic.

She just did magic on me.

And it's working.

It is?

My zits are gone?

( gasps)

Yeah, I can... I can honestly say

that your face if completely clear.

Whoo-hoo!

PHOEBE: It is my wedding day.

The one day of my life that is all about me

and nobody can see me.

I'm sorry, I didn't mean

to do it.

Stop following me.

Go away!

Hang on, Phoebe. Don't lose it now.

Here, you can't walk around naked

and I think it'll fit now. Paige!

What difference does it make?

I am invisible.

My wedding is supposed to start in less than one hour

and everyone I've ever known is gonna be there.

And I'm never gonna be able to face them again.

( groans)

( books crash)

All right!

This is all just a backfire

to the vanishing spell.

There's gotta be a reversal in here.

Hey.

What's going on up here?

You guys aren't even dressed yet.

Where's Phoebe?

She is still putting on her face.

Well, I can't keep stalling this photographer forever,

he's done portraits in every room in the house.

Send him ahead to the church.

Phoebe?

That was me.

I'm working on my impressions.

Dad, go downstairs and wait for us there.

See?

I'm working it into the toast.

( groans): Oh, what's the use?

I might as well call Cole and tell him it's off.

Oh, honey, we'll, we'll, we'll...

Something you said is bothering me.

Why would there be a backfire to the vanishing spell?

Personal gain, I guess.

Yeah, but there wasn't any of that

when I used it to help others, why Phoebe?

What, are you suggesting that

there is outside magic at play here?

Yeah, the same magic that dug up the Lazarus demon

and then there was the acne... and then...

and the super-sized wedding dress.

She's rambling.

Should I yell at her again?

No!

She might be on to something.

Listen, we're not fighting each other here,

we're fighting evil.

We kick evil's ass every day.

Sometimes twice a day.

Okay, today's a day

just like any other day.

Evil wants this wedding canceled?

Screw that.

We're not gonna go down

without a fight.

Okay, so what we do is we get dressed,

we head to the church,

while we look for a way to fix Phoebe.

Are you with me?

Yes. Phoebe...

Grab the Book, let's go.

Get the dress.

( classical music plays)

There you go.

( mumuring)

The wedding was supposed to start 15 minutes ago.

Where are the girls?

Phoebe needs to talk to you in the dressing room.

It's bad luck for the groom

to see the bride before the wedding.

I don't think that that's gonna be a problem.

Okay, this one's gotta work.

It's the spell that reversed

my enhanced breasts. Here.

"Guiding spirits, hear our plea, annul this magic, let it be."

Can you see me?

Not even your breasts.

( sighs heavily)

Well, that's it.

It's the last reversal spell

we have. It's okay, you guys.

You did your best.

( knocking on door)

Come on, let's go.

We'll leave you two alone to talk.

Wait a minute, where's Phoebe?

Over here.

Hi, honey. Phoebe?

You're invisible?

Yeah. Looks like whatever demon's

trying to stop our wedding

succeeded.

Oh, honey.

We tried every trick we know to fix it.

And nothing's worked. And now...

Phoebe?

( sobs): I wanted the perfect wedding.

But I... I didn't want it for me.

I wanted it for you.

You've given me so much. You don't deserve this.

( crying)

It's okay, baby.

We'll find another way, I promise.

Okay.

I'll make the announcement. All right.

The wedding's off.

Not necessarily.

Get everybody in their positions.

We'll start with the processional,

tell the quartet.

Well, what about Phoebe, she's invisible.

Not for long. We hope.

So go on.

And look for your bride walking down the aisle.

Go on.

PHOEBE: Wait, hold on here.

I'm a little confused.

I thought we were out of spells.

Mm-mm, not yet.

You know how every attempt we've made

to reverse your invisibility has failed?

Yes.

Well, what if we don't reverse it,

we just shift it from one sister to another?

Wait, you mean transfer the invisibility to you?

No way. I won't let you.

Phoebe,

every Cinderella needs a fairy godmother.

Let me be yours.

Paige. Please.

I need to do this so you know

that I am not trying to stop your wedding.

( classical music plays)

The natives are growing restless in there.

Yeah, I know, a couple have already left.

Will somebody tell me what's going on?

I wish I knew.

Places, everybody.

Aren't you going to seat me?

I'll get her. No, allow me.

You should wait for Phoebe.

They'll recognize you.

You never contacted me.

Did your potion work? Yes.

And did they use the spell you thought they would?

Yes, and now she's invisible.

Then why are all these people here?

I think they found a spell to reverse our magic.

And did she find an obedience spell

to make you do as she pleases?

Don't forget who you're talking to.

Where's the Lazarus demon?

In my chambers awaiting your command.

Order him to attack.

The girls will stop the ceremony

to save innocent lives.

( indistinct whispering)

( playing "Wedding March")

( music continues)

Where's Paige?

I don't know.

PAIGE: Now I'm going to cry.

Please be seated.

( music stops)

Thank you all for coming to honor the love

between Cole Turner and Phoebe Halliwell.

Oh, no.

Before we get started, I must ask,

is there anyone who has just cause why this couple

should not be united in marriage.

( grunting)

( indistinct conversations)

This is your time,

your platform.

Speak now or forever hold your peace.

( grunting)

( indistinct conversations)

I'll check that out. Keep going.

Since nobody here

can show just cause, it's my privilege to...

PIPER: You put her down!

( grunting, glass breaking)

Excuse me.

Keep going, please.

Just keep going.

As I was saying,

it's my privilege to ask who gives this woman

to this man today?

Uh, her sisters and I do.

PIPER: Son of a bitch!

( grunting)

LEO: Piper, look out!

( screaming, clamoring)

( indistinct conversations)

Stop!

Where's Paige?

I don't know.

Leo, where's Paige?

LEO: I can't get a read on her.

Wherever she is, her heart's not beating.

Over here.

What the hell is going on in here?

That's it. The wedding is off!

Tell everyone to get out of here.

Go, go, go, go, go, go!

Just send the food to the house.

Yes, and the bill.

Not as sorry as I am.

Thank you.

Caterer's taken care of.

Thank you so much, Piper, I just...

I can't deal with any of that right now.

It's okay. It's been a tough day.

How about you, how are you doing?

I'm still a little shaky.

We nearly lost you.

We're lucky the demon hesitated when Cole yelled.

Yeah, but why did he?

Maybe he was surprised somebody yelled at him.

We should all just be thankful

that we're alive.

And visible, although I'm not sure how that happened.

COLE: I do.

The magic you were under was supposed to stop the wedding,

it wore off once the wedding was canceled.

Oh, you mean when evil won?

I am not stopping

until I find out who sent that thing after us.

PIPER: Speaking of the demon,

the crispy critter needs to find its way back to a cemetery.

Well, I know a local haunt. I can take it there.

And what happens when my freeze wears off on the way?

You'll be as defenseless as a cat toy.

I'll go with him.

I want to make sure

it's in the ground for good.

Let's all do it.

Fine by me.

I found a spot.

This headstone's from the early 1900's.

Nobody will come digging here any time soon.

Piper, if you see anyone coming,

freeze them.

Don't worry, honey.

It took Leo and me three times to get married.

It'll happen for you and Cole.

We just need to figure out what kind of evil

stopped your wedding and why.

I have an idea.

Why don't we just ask it?

Oh, don't be crazy.

That Lazarus demon

is a time bomb waiting to explode.

No, I want to know who ruined the happiest day of my life.

Phoebe, I'm asking you, please, for me, don't do this.

Cole, I can't believe you don't want to know.

One flinch and I'll blow you into briquettes.

Who resurrected you?

Ask him.

You swore I'd never see

a cemetery again if I helped you.

You set me up!

PIPER: Cole...

what is this demon talking about?

I have no idea.

Liar!

You ordered me

to attack them in the church!

Is this how you reward your loyal servants?

Okay, Cole, what is going on?

Because, I gotta tell you, right now, I am freaking out!

Eh, what's the point?

You already figured it out.

No... No, it can't be.

No...

It can't be. No.

It's not.

It's the Seer.

PIPER: Not for long.

No, don't.

Where's Cole?

Unconscious in the mausoleum.

PAIGE: Why would you save us one day

and try to kill us the next?

For the same reason.

To keep the balance of power between good and evil.

PIPER: Don't be cryptic.

I hate cryptic.

I had a vision.

If you married Cole on this day,

his love would have helped you evolve

into a much stronger witch, too strong.

I had to stop you.

And I did.

Bitch.

Cole...

Go. I'll bury the rest of the demon.

Cole!

It was the Seer.

She's in the cemetery.

PIPER: Yeah, we know.

We had a little chat.

I'm surprised she didn't kill you.

That's not her style.

( groans): Killing's beneath her.

She only does it if she has to.

Come on, let's get you home.

You okay?

PAIGE: I still don't understand.

If the Seer wanted to stop Phoebe from marrying you,

wouldn't she want to kill you?

I don't know, you'd have to ask the Seer.

Look, a chapel.

PAIGE: A chapel in a mausoleum?

LEO: That's a first.

It's cute.

And perfect.

For what?

A wedding.

I couldn't agree more.

Really?

You got the rings.

And we're all here.

Okay, I do.

I mean, I mean...

I will. Let's go.

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

Not two but one...

till life be gone.

You may kiss the bride.

We did it.

Yes, we did.

It is done.