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1
00:00:03,423 --> 00:00:06,597
Help!
2
00:00:09,603 --> 00:00:11,189
Hello?
3
00:00:17,619 --> 00:00:19,080
My balls.
4
00:00:25,050 --> 00:00:27,096
Sweet Jesus.
5
00:00:43,629 --> 00:00:45,465
Oh...
6
00:01:00,495 --> 00:01:02,584
Ow.
7
00:01:22,122 --> 00:01:24,085
Hello?
8
00:01:42,831 --> 00:01:45,127
Hello?
9
00:01:53,686 --> 00:01:55,940
Hello?
10
00:02:33,389 --> 00:02:35,435
Mm.
11
00:02:37,314 --> 00:02:40,278
What?
12
00:02:44,245 --> 00:02:46,123
Oh, Christ.
13
00:02:46,123 --> 00:02:48,712
Oh, fuck.
14
00:02:52,512 --> 00:02:54,808
Oh, God.
15
00:02:54,808 --> 00:02:56,770
How‐‐ how bad is it, Doc?
16
00:02:56,770 --> 00:02:58,524
Eh...
17
00:02:58,524 --> 00:03:01,530
Va bene.
18
00:03:01,530 --> 00:03:03,324
Hai perso molto sange.
19
00:03:03,324 --> 00:03:05,538
‐ Uh, sorry, what?
20
00:03:05,538 --> 00:03:07,416
Have I lost my balls?
21
00:03:07,416 --> 00:03:08,711
‐ Dovrei cucirlo.
22
00:03:08,711 --> 00:03:11,048
I‐‐I don't understand you.
23
00:03:11,048 --> 00:03:13,094
Uh, do you speak English?
24
00:03:13,094 --> 00:03:14,263
Inglese?
25
00:03:14,263 --> 00:03:15,307
‐ No, no, Italiano.
26
00:03:15,307 --> 00:03:17,227
No, Inglese.
27
00:03:17,227 --> 00:03:18,689
No, no.
28
00:03:18,689 --> 00:03:20,568
‐ Inglese?
No?
29
00:03:20,568 --> 00:03:23,489
Oh, no?
Oh, Christ.
30
00:03:23,489 --> 00:03:25,076
Um...
31
00:03:25,076 --> 00:03:28,876
Hey, can‐‐ can I...
32
00:03:28,876 --> 00:03:31,130
Hey, Doc, you see this?
33
00:03:31,130 --> 00:03:33,927
Uno.
34
00:03:33,927 --> 00:03:37,560
Due.
35
00:03:37,560 --> 00:03:39,146
Down here.
36
00:03:39,146 --> 00:03:41,192
Due?
37
00:03:41,192 --> 00:03:42,277
‐ Ah, si, si.
38
00:03:42,277 --> 00:03:43,363
Due.
39
00:03:43,363 --> 00:03:44,741
‐ Due? Two? Two?
40
00:03:44,741 --> 00:03:46,369
I‐‐ I've got due balls?
‐ Si.
41
00:03:46,369 --> 00:03:48,122
Due testicoli, certo.
42
00:03:48,122 --> 00:03:49,918
‐ Oh, God, thank Christ.
43
00:03:49,918 --> 00:03:53,049
Thank God.
I've got two.
44
00:03:53,049 --> 00:03:55,053
- Due.- Due.
45
00:03:55,053 --> 00:03:57,265
Due balls!
46
00:03:57,265 --> 00:03:59,646
I got due!
Oh!
47
00:04:00,815 --> 00:04:02,359
‐ Huh?
Oh, yeah, okay, sure.
48
00:04:02,359 --> 00:04:04,321
You do‐‐ do whatever
you gotta do, Doc.
49
00:04:04,321 --> 00:04:05,365
‐ Eh...
50
00:04:05,365 --> 00:04:07,704
‐ Due.
51
00:04:10,751 --> 00:04:13,632
Oh, Christ!
52
00:04:28,662 --> 00:04:31,710
Hey!
53
00:04:39,391 --> 00:04:41,395
Bravo!
54
00:04:43,859 --> 00:04:47,282
Hi, hi.
55
00:04:47,282 --> 00:04:50,371
Oh...
56
00:04:50,371 --> 00:04:52,668
Oh, Christ.
57
00:04:52,668 --> 00:04:55,215
Thank you, thanks.
58
00:05:01,520 --> 00:05:03,524
Cheers, thank you for having me.
59
00:05:06,403 --> 00:05:08,491
Spaghetti's coming.
Oh, my God.
60
00:05:10,746 --> 00:05:12,249
Christ, thank you.
61
00:05:12,249 --> 00:05:14,378
Oh, thank you.
62
00:05:14,378 --> 00:05:16,591
That's wonderful.
63
00:05:19,388 --> 00:05:21,392
Salute, salute!
64
00:05:23,939 --> 00:05:25,693
Cheers.
65
00:05:25,693 --> 00:05:27,362
Salute.
66
00:05:59,969 --> 00:06:01,430
Buongiorno.
67
00:06:01,430 --> 00:06:03,852
Buongiorno, signore.
68
00:06:09,739 --> 00:06:11,618
‐ Buongiorno.
69
00:06:11,618 --> 00:06:15,124
Buongiorno.
70
00:06:20,093 --> 00:06:22,472
So what is that?
71
00:06:32,492 --> 00:06:35,833
I just want to know how far
it is to the pasture.
72
00:06:37,335 --> 00:06:39,131
No, not too far.
Okay, good.
73
00:06:39,131 --> 00:06:41,845
'Cause I might collapse.
74
00:06:45,602 --> 00:06:46,938
If you wanted to,
that'd be fine.
75
00:06:46,938 --> 00:06:49,443
But I'm not pressuring you
or anything.
76
00:06:49,443 --> 00:06:51,321
Yeah, yeah, I'm‐‐ I'm American.
77
00:06:51,321 --> 00:06:54,579
Yeah, everything about me...
78
00:06:54,579 --> 00:06:56,624
Uh, is that a bird?
79
00:06:59,129 --> 00:07:01,435
‐ What? I‐‐ I don't understand
what you're saying.
80
00:07:01,435 --> 00:07:03,387
‐ Shh!
‐ Shh.
81
00:07:33,030 --> 00:07:34,992
‐ Ciao, Yo‐Yo.Buongiorno.
82
00:07:34,992 --> 00:07:37,497
‐ Buongiorno, Silvio.
83
00:08:55,027 --> 00:08:56,405
‐ Are you an American?
84
00:08:56,405 --> 00:08:58,952
No, no Inglese.
85
00:08:58,952 --> 00:09:02,083
No Inglese. Italiano.
86
00:09:02,083 --> 00:09:04,630
‐ Is this the American?
‐ Si, si, Americano.
87
00:09:04,630 --> 00:09:05,757
‐ No.
88
00:09:05,757 --> 00:09:07,886
Mamma, nonna, per favore!
89
00:09:07,886 --> 00:09:10,809
‐ Si, si!Americano, Americano.
90
00:09:10,809 --> 00:09:12,855
‐ Ah, Yossarian.
91
00:09:15,611 --> 00:09:17,740
‐ No.
92
00:09:24,377 --> 00:09:26,716
Seven inch swing,
four inch gap.
93
00:09:26,716 --> 00:09:28,928
Why is that so hard?
94
00:09:28,928 --> 00:09:30,181
Then we look tight!
95
00:09:30,181 --> 00:09:32,268
Then we look fierce!
96
00:09:32,268 --> 00:09:35,817
Then we stand out from all
the goddamn free‐swinging arms
97
00:09:35,817 --> 00:09:38,489
that seem to be
the goddamn fashion these days!
98
00:09:40,619 --> 00:09:43,541
You goddamn spastics think
I'm gonna let you
99
00:09:43,541 --> 00:09:47,966
prance around here like
a Busby Berkeley chorus line,
100
00:09:47,966 --> 00:09:50,429
then you've got another thing
coming to you.
101
00:09:53,853 --> 00:09:56,441
All right, let's have
a look at these nuts.
102
00:09:56,441 --> 00:10:00,116
‐ You're gonna need
to skootch and lift.
103
00:10:00,116 --> 00:10:02,245
‐ Okay.
104
00:10:13,058 --> 00:10:14,477
‐ Ow!
105
00:10:14,477 --> 00:10:16,314
‐ Sorry, it's just
a little dried blood.
106
00:10:18,402 --> 00:10:20,448
Okay.
107
00:10:20,448 --> 00:10:23,538
All right, let's have
a look at these.
108
00:10:24,790 --> 00:10:26,919
Now, John, it looks like
109
00:10:26,919 --> 00:10:29,550
this piece of flak went...
110
00:10:29,550 --> 00:10:31,136
right between your thighs.
111
00:10:31,136 --> 00:10:33,474
It missed your left testicle,
it missed your right testicle,
112
00:10:33,474 --> 00:10:35,604
and it split the soft tissue
of your scrotum
113
00:10:35,604 --> 00:10:37,524
right between your testicles.
114
00:10:37,524 --> 00:10:39,444
And that is what we call
spectacular luck.
115
00:10:39,444 --> 00:10:41,239
‐ So can I go home now?
116
00:10:41,239 --> 00:10:43,118
Is it that kind
of spectacular luck?
117
00:10:43,118 --> 00:10:44,900
You came so close.
118
00:10:44,900 --> 00:10:47,460
Now, if you lose a testicle
for your country,
119
00:10:47,460 --> 00:10:48,630
of course you get to go home.
120
00:10:48,630 --> 00:10:49,757
But you?
121
00:10:49,757 --> 00:10:52,053
You only almost lost a testicle.
122
00:10:52,053 --> 00:10:53,347
You see the difference?
123
00:10:53,347 --> 00:10:55,226
The best I can do
for an almost‐lost testicle
124
00:10:55,226 --> 00:10:56,729
is just to keep you here
while it's healing.
125
00:10:56,729 --> 00:10:58,733
Of course, while it's healing,
126
00:10:58,733 --> 00:11:00,737
the number of missions you have
to flying keeps rising.
127
00:11:00,737 --> 00:11:02,658
Which means the longer
you're here,
128
00:11:02,658 --> 00:11:04,327
the further away you get
from going home.
129
00:11:04,327 --> 00:11:06,498
But you already know that.
130
00:11:06,498 --> 00:11:09,128
All right, nurse,
I'll leave you to it.
131
00:11:13,011 --> 00:11:15,809
‐ Spectacular luck, huh?
132
00:11:15,809 --> 00:11:19,482
‐ Oh, I'm the luckiest guy
in the world.
133
00:11:19,482 --> 00:11:21,904
‐ Who knew it was as simple
as one testicle?
134
00:11:21,904 --> 00:11:24,660
We probably could have
arranged for that months ago.
135
00:11:25,871 --> 00:11:28,208
‐ I like the way you think.
136
00:11:31,966 --> 00:11:34,930
What time
do you ship out?
137
00:11:34,930 --> 00:11:36,308
6:00 am.
138
00:11:36,308 --> 00:11:38,103
‐ Ugh, that's ghastly.
139
00:11:38,103 --> 00:11:39,188
‐ Oh, it is.
140
00:11:39,188 --> 00:11:42,111
It's ghastly, all right.
141
00:11:42,111 --> 00:11:44,950
‐ Well, I'd tell you I'm gonna
miss you, but I probably won't.
142
00:11:44,950 --> 00:11:47,371
‐ You're gonna miss me a lot
more than I'm gonna miss you.
143
00:11:47,371 --> 00:11:50,377
‐ I doubt it.
144
00:11:50,377 --> 00:11:51,964
‐ Do you wanna put money on it?
145
00:11:51,964 --> 00:11:53,425
‐ Sure.
146
00:11:53,425 --> 00:11:55,639
$5.
147
00:11:55,639 --> 00:11:57,391
‐ What?
‐ $5.
148
00:11:57,391 --> 00:11:58,561
What are you, cheap?
149
00:11:58,561 --> 00:12:00,982
100.
‐ I'm not putting $100.
150
00:12:00,982 --> 00:12:03,320
You don't have $100.
‐ I won't need it.
151
00:12:03,320 --> 00:12:04,949
‐ Yes, you will.
‐ No.
152
00:12:04,949 --> 00:12:07,328
You're silly.
153
00:12:07,328 --> 00:12:09,667
‐ No, I'm not.
‐ Mm‐hmm.
154
00:12:23,820 --> 00:12:26,449
I like the way your neck smells.
155
00:12:27,911 --> 00:12:29,080
Mm.
156
00:12:29,080 --> 00:12:32,754
I like the way
your hair smells.
157
00:12:34,007 --> 00:12:36,804
I like the way
your shoulders smell.
158
00:12:48,035 --> 00:12:49,663
‐ Better start saving
your pennies.
159
00:12:57,011 --> 00:12:58,639
Buongiorno,
Mister Yo‐Yo.
160
00:12:58,639 --> 00:13:00,100
We have a gift for you!
‐ Hey, fellas.
161
00:13:00,100 --> 00:13:01,144
What's the rumpus?
162
00:13:01,144 --> 00:13:02,438
Is from, uh,
Mister Milo.
163
00:13:02,438 --> 00:13:04,233
‐ Oh, is he back?
I need to talk to him.
164
00:13:04,233 --> 00:13:06,237
‐ Eh, no, no.
Mister Milo in Togo.
165
00:13:06,237 --> 00:13:07,364
‐ When is he back?
166
00:13:07,364 --> 00:13:08,951
‐ Eh, sabato.
‐ Saturday.
167
00:13:08,951 --> 00:13:10,287
‐ Well, can you get him
on the radio?
168
00:13:10,287 --> 00:13:12,041
I need to talk to him.
He offered me a job.
169
00:13:12,041 --> 00:13:14,045
I said no, but now I think
I need to say yes.
170
00:13:14,045 --> 00:13:15,965
‐ Eh, no, no, he on a ship.
171
00:13:15,965 --> 00:13:18,095
He send you this.
172
00:13:18,095 --> 00:13:20,725
This for your testicolo.
173
00:13:20,725 --> 00:13:23,606
‐ Is very big room.
174
00:13:23,606 --> 00:13:25,109
‐ For testicolo, no?
175
00:13:25,109 --> 00:13:27,196
Yes, because no want, eh...
176
00:13:27,196 --> 00:13:28,658
...is very bad.
177
00:13:28,658 --> 00:13:30,537
‐ For your balls.
178
00:13:50,284 --> 00:13:52,831
Over here, tootsie!
179
00:13:57,966 --> 00:14:00,805
Nice pants!
180
00:14:09,322 --> 00:14:10,365
‐ I'm told this is
Cathcart's office now.
181
00:14:10,365 --> 00:14:12,036
‐ Yes, sir.
182
00:14:12,036 --> 00:14:13,706
‐ Where's Major Major gone?
‐ He's in there, too, sir.
183
00:14:13,706 --> 00:14:15,459
‐ They're in there together?
‐ Yes, sir.
184
00:14:15,459 --> 00:14:17,171
‐ Can I go in?
‐ That depends.
185
00:14:17,171 --> 00:14:20,595
‐ Depends on what?
‐ Depends on who you're here to see.
186
00:14:20,595 --> 00:14:23,099
‐ Cathcart?
‐ Fine.
187
00:14:23,099 --> 00:14:24,937
I told you,
the deal's off, Yossarian.
188
00:14:24,937 --> 00:14:26,649
I know the deal's off.
Hiya, Major.
189
00:14:26,649 --> 00:14:28,026
‐ Hi, Yossarian.
‐ How you been?
190
00:14:28,026 --> 00:14:29,037
‐ Pretty swell.
191
00:14:29,037 --> 00:14:32,284
‐ Well, then what is it that you want?
‐ I want to go home. You owe me.
192
00:14:32,284 --> 00:14:33,955
‐ I just told you
the deal is off.
193
00:14:33,955 --> 00:14:35,415
Scheisskopf saw to that.
You were there.
194
00:14:35,415 --> 00:14:37,419
‐ But I didn't make the deal
with Scheisskopf,
195
00:14:37,419 --> 00:14:39,967
I made it with you!
‐ And he unmade it. My hands are tied.
196
00:14:39,967 --> 00:14:42,221
‐ I've had my balls blown off.
197
00:14:42,221 --> 00:14:43,599
I want you to send me home.
198
00:14:43,599 --> 00:14:44,810
‐ I can't.
199
00:14:44,810 --> 00:14:46,062
‐ What do you mean you can't?
200
00:14:46,062 --> 00:14:47,857
- Yes, you can!
- I mean that I can't.
201
00:14:47,857 --> 00:14:49,569
I'd like to, believe me.
202
00:14:49,569 --> 00:14:51,699
I'd like to see you gone
from here as much as you would.
203
00:14:51,699 --> 00:14:53,577
‐ Then do it!
‐ I can't, son.
204
00:14:53,577 --> 00:14:55,540
‐ You mean to tell me that
you don't have the authority
205
00:14:55,540 --> 00:14:56,834
to send people home?
206
00:14:56,834 --> 00:14:58,086
‐ Oh, I have the authority
to send people home,
207
00:14:58,086 --> 00:14:59,548
I just can't send you home.
208
00:14:59,548 --> 00:15:02,052
I am under strict instructions
not to send you home
209
00:15:02,052 --> 00:15:03,388
without his prior approval.
210
00:15:03,388 --> 00:15:05,183
‐ He actually said that?
‐ He did.
211
00:15:05,183 --> 00:15:06,854
‐ But I've had
my balls blown off!
212
00:15:06,854 --> 00:15:08,941
What more does it take?
This is a medical emergency.
213
00:15:08,941 --> 00:15:10,360
‐ Well, if it's
a medical emergency,
214
00:15:10,360 --> 00:15:11,905
I suggest you go talk
to Doc Daneeka.
215
00:15:11,905 --> 00:15:15,037
Do I look like
a ball doctor to you?
216
00:15:15,037 --> 00:15:16,080
‐ You understand?
‐ Yes, sir.
217
00:15:16,080 --> 00:15:17,291
‐ That's two doses
every two hours.
218
00:15:17,291 --> 00:15:19,921
‐ Okay.
‐ Doc, hey, I need your help.
219
00:15:19,921 --> 00:15:21,675
You gotta tell Scheisskopf that
I've had my balls blown off.
220
00:15:21,675 --> 00:15:23,053
‐ But you haven't had
your balls blown off.
221
00:15:23,053 --> 00:15:24,305
‐ Doesn't matter.
222
00:15:24,305 --> 00:15:25,683
He needs to think
that they've been blown off.
223
00:15:25,683 --> 00:15:27,061
‐ You're asking me
to lie to a guy
224
00:15:27,061 --> 00:15:28,229
that we both know is trouble.
225
00:15:28,229 --> 00:15:29,608
‐ No, I'm not asking you to lie.
226
00:15:29,608 --> 00:15:31,653
I'm asking you to use
your imagination.
227
00:15:31,653 --> 00:15:35,035
You know that if I stay here,
Scheisskopf is gonna fuck me.
228
00:15:35,035 --> 00:15:37,289
I've lost all my friends.
229
00:15:37,289 --> 00:15:39,878
I've flown more missions
than anybody on this base,
230
00:15:39,878 --> 00:15:42,424
and every time I get close
to reaching the quota
231
00:15:42,424 --> 00:15:44,888
they raise it on me to fuck me.
232
00:15:44,888 --> 00:15:47,434
I can't do this anymore.
233
00:15:47,434 --> 00:15:50,023
I get that you couldn't
ground me for insanity.
234
00:15:50,023 --> 00:15:52,444
I get that you couldn't
ground me for liver problems
235
00:15:52,444 --> 00:15:54,950
that never existed,
but now I finally have
236
00:15:54,950 --> 00:15:57,789
a legitimate,
actual medical complaint.
237
00:15:57,789 --> 00:16:00,962
And you promised to help me
when it counted.
238
00:16:00,962 --> 00:16:02,674
I'm not asking you to lie.
239
00:16:02,674 --> 00:16:05,345
I'm asking you to be a doctor.
240
00:16:09,311 --> 00:16:11,274
Sir,
Captain Yossarian suffered
241
00:16:11,274 --> 00:16:12,944
a catastrophic
testicular infarction.
242
00:16:12,944 --> 00:16:14,113
‐ A what?
243
00:16:14,113 --> 00:16:16,523
‐ A catastrophic testicular infarction.
‐ What the hell is that?
244
00:16:16,523 --> 00:16:19,583
‐ Well, sir, it's a soft tissue
trauma to the scrotal sack.
245
00:16:19,583 --> 00:16:20,751
‐ And?
246
00:16:20,751 --> 00:16:22,589
‐ And I believe
Captain Yossarian
247
00:16:22,589 --> 00:16:23,924
should be sent home.
248
00:16:23,924 --> 00:16:25,135
‐ It's that bad?
249
00:16:25,135 --> 00:16:28,099
‐ He may never have children.
250
00:16:28,099 --> 00:16:30,020
‐ You're saying he's had
his balls blown off.
251
00:16:30,020 --> 00:16:31,480
‐ Approximately, sir.
252
00:16:31,480 --> 00:16:33,067
‐ Hmm.
253
00:16:33,067 --> 00:16:34,320
I don't know, Doc.
254
00:16:34,320 --> 00:16:35,740
If I'd had my balls blown off,
255
00:16:35,740 --> 00:16:37,952
I can't imagine I'd be
standing there just like that.
256
00:16:37,952 --> 00:16:39,789
And at attention, no less.
257
00:16:39,789 --> 00:16:42,921
‐ Well, he's heavily medicated
right now, sir.
258
00:16:42,921 --> 00:16:44,966
‐ I want to see.
259
00:16:44,966 --> 00:16:46,553
Excuse me, sir?
260
00:16:46,553 --> 00:16:48,056
‐ I want to see.
261
00:16:48,056 --> 00:16:50,561
I wanna understand this...
262
00:16:50,561 --> 00:16:52,732
"infarction."
263
00:16:52,732 --> 00:16:54,026
Drop your pants, soldier.
264
00:16:54,026 --> 00:16:55,696
‐ I‐I'm not sure that's
such a good idea, sir.
265
00:16:55,696 --> 00:16:57,199
He‐‐ he's very tender
down there.
266
00:16:57,199 --> 00:16:58,409
‐ I want to see.
267
00:16:58,409 --> 00:17:00,581
Drop your pants, soldier.
268
00:17:12,104 --> 00:17:14,316
Take the bandage off.
269
00:17:44,126 --> 00:17:47,090
‐ I'm counting two testicles
down here, Doc.
270
00:17:49,053 --> 00:17:51,516
I want these stitches out,
God damn it.
271
00:17:51,516 --> 00:17:54,021
I want this nut sack
back in the air flying missions
272
00:17:54,021 --> 00:17:56,693
and serving his country like
everybody else, God damn it.
273
00:17:56,693 --> 00:17:59,658
Hike up your pants, soldier!
274
00:18:11,848 --> 00:18:13,393
‐ Who are you?
275
00:18:13,393 --> 00:18:15,480
‐ I'm Nurse Cramer.
276
00:18:15,480 --> 00:18:18,069
‐ Oh.
277
00:18:18,069 --> 00:18:20,700
Is Sue Anne not working today?
278
00:18:20,700 --> 00:18:23,580
‐ Nurse Duckett's gone.
279
00:18:24,999 --> 00:18:26,419
‐ Where?
280
00:18:26,419 --> 00:18:28,590
Gone home.
281
00:18:30,135 --> 00:18:31,847
‐ To the nurses' quarters?
282
00:18:31,847 --> 00:18:34,978
‐ She's gone home.
Her tour finished.
283
00:18:38,861 --> 00:18:40,155
‐ When?
284
00:18:40,155 --> 00:18:42,367
‐ She left this morning.
285
00:18:47,962 --> 00:18:49,549
‐ She didn't say anything.
286
00:18:49,549 --> 00:18:51,010
We treat a lot
of soldiers here.
287
00:18:51,010 --> 00:18:53,557
She's not about to say goodbye
to all of them.
288
00:18:53,557 --> 00:18:57,063
All right, let's have a look
at these testicles.
289
00:18:59,318 --> 00:19:01,113
Okay.
290
00:19:01,113 --> 00:19:04,244
Looks like you're good to go.
291
00:19:41,068 --> 00:19:43,114
Sorry, sir.
292
00:19:44,617 --> 00:19:47,163
‐ What's your name?
‐ Snowden, sir.
293
00:19:47,163 --> 00:19:49,919
‐ What's your first name?
‐ Christopher, sir.
294
00:19:49,919 --> 00:19:52,800
‐ I'm John.
295
00:19:52,800 --> 00:19:55,556
This your first mission?
296
00:19:55,556 --> 00:19:57,392
‐ Yes, sir.
297
00:19:57,392 --> 00:20:00,481
It's‐‐ it's my first mission.
298
00:20:01,610 --> 00:20:04,114
Take a breath, son.
299
00:20:06,745 --> 00:20:09,249
‐ You're gonna be fine.
300
00:20:09,249 --> 00:20:11,420
Okay?
301
00:20:11,420 --> 00:20:13,634
Let's go, it'll be fun.
302
00:20:13,634 --> 00:20:16,138
‐ Yes, sir.
303
00:20:33,005 --> 00:20:35,636
‐ Hey, where you going?
304
00:20:37,807 --> 00:20:39,644
‐ I‐‐ I'm a tail gunner.
305
00:20:39,644 --> 00:20:41,815
‐ There's nothing to shoot at.
306
00:20:41,815 --> 00:20:44,654
There's no Germans in the air.
It's just us.
307
00:20:44,654 --> 00:20:46,365
Have a seat
by that window over there.
308
00:20:46,365 --> 00:20:48,537
You'll be all right.
309
00:20:50,373 --> 00:20:52,252
Just stay out of that tail.
310
00:20:52,252 --> 00:20:54,507
‐ Yes, sir.
311
00:21:10,873 --> 00:21:12,752
Coming upon two minutes out.
312
00:21:15,591 --> 00:21:18,012
We're at 4,000 feet.
313
00:21:20,475 --> 00:21:21,895
See the target on the left?
314
00:21:21,895 --> 00:21:23,690
You see that?
315
00:21:25,986 --> 00:21:28,700
I got it.
316
00:21:38,094 --> 00:21:40,223
‐ Here we go.
317
00:21:40,223 --> 00:21:41,851
Holding steady.
318
00:21:41,851 --> 00:21:43,855
Are you lined up, Yossarian?
319
00:21:43,855 --> 00:21:45,651
Yes, I'm fucking
lined up.
320
00:21:45,651 --> 00:21:47,487
That's the wrong bridge.
321
00:21:52,915 --> 00:21:55,086
‐ Hey, what happened back there?
‐ The right engine is hit!
322
00:21:55,086 --> 00:21:56,506
‐ We're hit!‐ Help him!
323
00:21:56,506 --> 00:21:57,758
‐ Cut the fuel!‐ Help him!
324
00:21:57,758 --> 00:21:58,969
‐ Cutting the fuel!‐ Help him!
325
00:21:58,969 --> 00:22:00,931
‐ Help who?
‐ The bombardier!
326
00:22:00,931 --> 00:22:02,183
Help him!
327
00:22:02,183 --> 00:22:03,895
Help the bombardier!
328
00:22:03,895 --> 00:22:05,481
‐ I'm the bombardier!
329
00:22:05,481 --> 00:22:07,110
Then help him!
330
00:22:07,110 --> 00:22:08,487
Help him!
‐ Help who?
331
00:22:08,487 --> 00:22:10,449
‐ Who is this?
‐ The side gunner!
332
00:22:10,449 --> 00:22:12,036
The kid!The new kid!
333
00:22:12,036 --> 00:22:14,499
Help him!
334
00:22:18,007 --> 00:22:19,594
Where the hell
you going?
335
00:22:29,154 --> 00:22:31,116
Okay, okay.
336
00:22:33,162 --> 00:22:35,249
‐ I'm cold.
337
00:22:37,671 --> 00:22:41,053
‐ You're gonna be
all right, okay?
338
00:22:41,053 --> 00:22:43,224
You're gonna be all right.
339
00:22:49,904 --> 00:22:51,991
Okay.
Oh, shit.
340
00:22:51,991 --> 00:22:53,494
Oh, shit.
341
00:22:53,494 --> 00:22:54,956
‐ I'm cold.
342
00:22:54,956 --> 00:22:57,293
‐ Well, we're gonna
get you warm.
343
00:22:59,214 --> 00:23:00,299
Okay.
344
00:23:00,299 --> 00:23:02,805
Okay, look...
345
00:23:02,805 --> 00:23:05,769
it's ugly, kid, but it's not
as ugly as it looks.
346
00:23:05,769 --> 00:23:07,856
There's no arteries cut,
so you're not gonna die.
347
00:23:07,856 --> 00:23:09,150
‐ But I'm cold.
348
00:23:09,150 --> 00:23:11,280
Well, that's
a good sign, you know?
349
00:23:11,280 --> 00:23:14,035
It's a sign that your body...
350
00:23:14,035 --> 00:23:16,958
Is responding properly...
351
00:23:16,958 --> 00:23:20,632
And it's sending the warmth
to your leg.
352
00:23:20,632 --> 00:23:23,137
But your brain doesn't know.
353
00:23:23,137 --> 00:23:25,433
Okay.
354
00:23:25,433 --> 00:23:26,853
Keep that there.
355
00:23:26,853 --> 00:23:29,357
‐ It's all right.
That's all right.
356
00:23:29,357 --> 00:23:32,447
‐ What did you say
your name was?
357
00:23:32,447 --> 00:23:34,367
‐ It's John.
358
00:23:34,367 --> 00:23:36,038
John Yossarian.
359
00:23:36,038 --> 00:23:38,167
John Yossarian.
360
00:23:43,052 --> 00:23:45,389
‐ Okay, look at me, okay?
361
00:23:45,389 --> 00:23:48,479
Ah, fuck.
362
00:23:48,479 --> 00:23:51,276
Hey, can somebody help me here?
363
00:23:54,240 --> 00:23:56,704
This is a good bandage, okay?
364
00:23:56,704 --> 00:23:58,917
It's gonna get you home safe.
365
00:24:03,384 --> 00:24:04,929
My‐‐ my dad's a dentist.
366
00:24:04,929 --> 00:24:06,181
Yeah, I knew it.
367
00:24:06,181 --> 00:24:09,312
And he's gonna be glad
to have you back, right?
368
00:24:09,312 --> 00:24:11,108
Just look at me.
Look at me.
369
00:24:11,108 --> 00:24:13,655
When I get you back on land,
370
00:24:13,655 --> 00:24:16,619
Doc Daneeka's gonna
make you right as rain.
371
00:24:18,372 --> 00:24:20,292
‐ Okay.
372
00:24:20,292 --> 00:24:23,257
‐ Come here, let's get you up.
373
00:24:23,257 --> 00:24:24,593
Okay, come on.
Let's get you up.
374
00:24:29,436 --> 00:24:32,818
Oh, shit.
375
00:24:32,818 --> 00:24:34,822
Oh, shit.
376
00:24:42,211 --> 00:24:45,259
Look at me.
377
00:24:51,146 --> 00:24:52,398
Oh, fuck.
378
00:24:52,398 --> 00:24:54,820
Okay, okay.
379
00:24:54,820 --> 00:24:57,576
Okay, okay, okay.
380
00:24:57,576 --> 00:24:59,622
Your eyes‐‐
381
00:24:59,622 --> 00:25:01,208
Keep your eyes right on me.
382
00:25:01,208 --> 00:25:02,503
Okay, all right.
383
00:25:02,503 --> 00:25:05,174
Okay, now.
Now...
384
00:25:05,174 --> 00:25:06,636
We just gotta
get you comfortable.
385
00:25:06,636 --> 00:25:08,640
‐ Okay.
‐ Okay?
386
00:25:08,640 --> 00:25:10,434
Okay, get you comfortable.
387
00:25:10,434 --> 00:25:11,646
Nice and comfortable.
388
00:25:13,482 --> 00:25:15,444
Get you nice and comfortable.
389
00:25:15,444 --> 00:25:17,574
Okay.
Nice and easy.
390
00:25:17,574 --> 00:25:20,162
Nice and easy.
391
00:25:27,928 --> 00:25:30,517
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
392
00:25:33,105 --> 00:25:35,401
I'm sorry.
393
00:25:35,401 --> 00:25:37,573
I'm sorry.
394
00:29:01,647 --> 00:29:04,485
Yossarian.
395
00:29:04,485 --> 00:29:05,863
You okay?
396
00:29:05,863 --> 00:29:07,951
‐ Oh, hi, Chaplain.
397
00:29:07,951 --> 00:29:09,286
I'm fine.
398
00:29:09,286 --> 00:29:10,873
We had a hairy run
and we lost a man,
399
00:29:10,873 --> 00:29:13,671
but other than that I'm fine.
400
00:29:13,671 --> 00:29:16,384
‐ You're covered in blood.
401
00:29:16,384 --> 00:29:19,223
‐ It's not mine.
402
00:29:19,223 --> 00:29:22,271
‐ Do you want‐‐ can I...
get you some clothes?
403
00:29:22,271 --> 00:29:24,483
‐ No, I'm fine.
Thanks.
404
00:29:24,483 --> 00:29:26,530
How are you?
405
00:29:26,530 --> 00:29:28,283
‐ I'm...
406
00:29:28,283 --> 00:29:29,452
I'm fine, I'm‐‐ I'm good.
407
00:29:29,452 --> 00:29:31,707
Uh‐‐ ‐ That's good.
408
00:29:33,084 --> 00:29:35,046
‐ Who did you lose?
409
00:29:35,046 --> 00:29:37,134
‐ Oh, he was a new kid.
410
00:29:37,134 --> 00:29:40,265
You might not have
known him yet.
411
00:29:42,227 --> 00:29:43,856
‐ Where are you off to?
412
00:29:43,856 --> 00:29:46,862
‐ I'm heading home.
413
00:29:46,862 --> 00:29:48,783
‐ Can I get you anything?
414
00:29:48,783 --> 00:29:51,245
‐ No, thank you.
415
00:30:30,575 --> 00:30:34,791
None of us can saywe really knew Christopher...
416
00:30:34,791 --> 00:30:38,716
but we know the kindof boy he was:
417
00:30:38,716 --> 00:30:41,972
A boy willing to put himselfin the path of danger...
418
00:30:43,474 --> 00:30:46,355
A boy barely out of school,
419
00:30:46,355 --> 00:30:51,032
willing to leave his familyand all that the held dear,
420
00:30:51,032 --> 00:30:53,077
all that was safe,
421
00:30:53,077 --> 00:30:55,708
all that was familiar...
422
00:30:57,754 --> 00:30:59,381
To come to a place
423
00:30:59,381 --> 00:31:02,262
where those thingswould seem like a dream,
424
00:31:04,224 --> 00:31:07,732
for there was a bigger dream
425
00:31:07,732 --> 00:31:10,487
to liberate a worldbeset by darkness.
426
00:31:13,326 --> 00:31:15,915
Christopher Snowdenshared that dream...
427
00:31:18,127 --> 00:31:21,677
With all of us.
428
00:31:21,677 --> 00:31:24,849
When I came here, I knewthis would be one of my duties.
429
00:31:24,849 --> 00:31:26,937
This...
430
00:31:28,481 --> 00:31:32,657
But nobody really dies here.
431
00:31:32,657 --> 00:31:35,328
They just vanish, they...
432
00:31:36,748 --> 00:31:39,336
They vanish into the sky.
433
00:31:41,675 --> 00:31:43,846
So I do services.
434
00:31:43,846 --> 00:31:45,975
Not burials...
435
00:31:45,975 --> 00:31:47,895
services.
436
00:31:49,148 --> 00:31:50,985
But thankfully, not today.
437
00:31:50,985 --> 00:31:53,072
We'll keep
Christopher Snowden here.
438
00:31:53,072 --> 00:31:55,035
We'll know where he is.
We'll know where to find him.
439
00:31:55,035 --> 00:31:57,749
We'll lament
that the life he lived
440
00:31:57,749 --> 00:31:59,919
did not turn out to be
the life he should have lived.
441
00:31:59,919 --> 00:32:01,715
He was 18.
442
00:32:01,715 --> 00:32:05,013
He didn't get to know
the love of a wife or children.
443
00:32:05,013 --> 00:32:08,478
That they loved him;
they longed for his return
444
00:32:08,478 --> 00:32:11,902
just as he longs for them.
445
00:32:17,120 --> 00:32:19,124
Nevertheless,
he was greatly loved,
446
00:32:19,124 --> 00:32:21,128
and will be...
447
00:32:21,128 --> 00:32:22,507
greatly missed.
448
00:32:22,507 --> 00:32:25,178
Let us pray for his parents,
Raymond and Elizabeth.
449
00:32:25,178 --> 00:32:26,305
Hey.
450
00:32:26,305 --> 00:32:27,767
What are you doing in a tree?
451
00:32:27,767 --> 00:32:29,436
‐ Oh, hiya, Milo.
452
00:32:29,436 --> 00:32:31,107
Can I come up?
453
00:32:34,029 --> 00:32:35,991
I heard about your protest.
454
00:32:35,991 --> 00:32:37,410
Good for you.
455
00:32:37,410 --> 00:32:38,580
‐ This isn't a protest.
456
00:32:38,580 --> 00:32:41,753
‐ Well, good for you.
457
00:32:43,297 --> 00:32:45,678
Whose funeral?
458
00:32:45,678 --> 00:32:46,888
They're burying
that kid
459
00:32:46,888 --> 00:32:49,644
that got killed in my plane
the other day.
460
00:32:49,644 --> 00:32:51,188
What happened to him?
461
00:32:51,188 --> 00:32:53,527
‐ He got killed.
462
00:32:56,407 --> 00:32:59,371
‐ I heard your deal
with Cathcart fell through.
463
00:32:59,371 --> 00:33:01,835
You're not going home.
464
00:33:06,468 --> 00:33:08,264
Did you hear about Orr?
465
00:33:08,264 --> 00:33:10,895
He turned up in Sweden.
466
00:33:15,111 --> 00:33:16,322
‐ His body?
467
00:33:16,322 --> 00:33:18,869
‐ No, alive and well.
468
00:33:18,869 --> 00:33:21,498
Apparently he rode there.
469
00:33:21,498 --> 00:33:25,131
I don't know; they're saying
that's what he did.
470
00:33:25,131 --> 00:33:27,177
‐ Who's saying?
Where did you hear this?
471
00:33:27,177 --> 00:33:28,429
‐ Somebody heard from somebody.
472
00:33:28,429 --> 00:33:29,682
They're all talking
about it down there.
473
00:33:29,682 --> 00:33:30,726
If you weren't
running around naked
474
00:33:30,726 --> 00:33:33,941
you might have heard it, too.
475
00:33:33,941 --> 00:33:37,197
‐ Hey, good for him.
476
00:33:41,121 --> 00:33:44,545
It's gonna be all right.
477
00:33:44,545 --> 00:33:46,508
‐ Hey.
478
00:33:46,508 --> 00:33:48,219
Hey, where you going?
479
00:33:50,181 --> 00:33:53,605
Hey, you're gonna
come work with me, right?
480
00:33:53,605 --> 00:33:56,987
We'd be unstoppable!
481
00:33:56,987 --> 00:34:00,536
And during
the long winter of 1777,
482
00:34:00,536 --> 00:34:04,167
a Prussian nobleman by the name
of Baron Von Steuben
483
00:34:04,167 --> 00:34:08,217
aided George Washington greatly
in teaching musket drill
484
00:34:08,217 --> 00:34:11,348
to a small unit of 100 soldiers.
485
00:34:11,348 --> 00:34:13,603
Those soldiers taught
the remaining Continental Army
486
00:34:13,603 --> 00:34:15,816
at Valley Forge.
487
00:34:15,816 --> 00:34:18,195
And so, drill formation has
488
00:34:18,195 --> 00:34:21,201
a long and glorious history...
489
00:34:21,201 --> 00:34:24,876
that is a living link
to the days and the dreams
490
00:34:24,876 --> 00:34:26,921
of our founding fathers.
491
00:34:26,921 --> 00:34:30,136
And so, here today
with these shining blue skies
492
00:34:30,136 --> 00:34:32,808
that God has seen fit
to deliver...
493
00:34:32,808 --> 00:34:36,315
we, too, are a part
of that history.
494
00:34:39,154 --> 00:34:40,616
General Dreedle,
495
00:34:40,616 --> 00:34:43,830
Commanding Officer of the
entire European operation,
496
00:34:43,830 --> 00:34:46,001
has come here
all the way from London
497
00:34:46,001 --> 00:34:48,673
because he has heard
about you men...
498
00:34:50,468 --> 00:34:53,517
And your tight formations.
499
00:34:53,517 --> 00:34:56,648
Your fiercely tight formations.
500
00:34:57,858 --> 00:35:01,323
And now, without further ado...
501
00:35:01,323 --> 00:35:03,369
strike up the band.
502
00:35:03,369 --> 00:35:06,083
And, let's start the parade!
503
00:35:06,083 --> 00:35:09,924
Forward, march!
504
00:35:26,541 --> 00:35:28,419
For uncommon valor,
505
00:35:28,419 --> 00:35:32,970
I hereby award you
the Distinguished Flying Cross.
506
00:35:36,101 --> 00:35:39,149
This is Private
First Class James Marsh, sir.
507
00:35:39,149 --> 00:35:41,403
‐ Step forward, Private.
508
00:35:42,948 --> 00:35:44,952
For uncommon valor,
509
00:35:44,952 --> 00:35:48,960
I hereby award you
the Distinguished Flying Cross.
510
00:35:48,960 --> 00:35:50,631
‐ Well, sir, you know what?
511
00:35:50,631 --> 00:35:52,510
I didn't do nothing
my grandpappy didn't teach me.
512
00:35:52,510 --> 00:35:55,808
"Be a straight shooter.
Be a straight talker.
513
00:35:55,808 --> 00:35:58,020
Be a clean fighter,"
he always used to tell me.
514
00:35:58,020 --> 00:36:00,734
And by golly, if I hadn't tried
to abide by his advice‐‐
515
00:36:00,734 --> 00:36:02,457
‐ Thank you, Private.
‐ I didn't do nothing brave, though.
516
00:36:02,457 --> 00:36:04,700
I did what any other fella‐‐
‐ I'm sure you did.
517
00:36:04,700 --> 00:36:07,038
Good for you, son.
‐ Just like instinct.
518
00:36:33,884 --> 00:36:35,888
And who the hell is this?
519
00:36:35,888 --> 00:36:37,473
‐ This is Yossarian, sir.
520
00:36:37,473 --> 00:36:39,060
I don't know what the hell
he thinks he's doing.
521
00:36:39,060 --> 00:36:40,564
Is this some kind
of a joke, soldier?
522
00:36:40,564 --> 00:36:41,983
What the hell is he doing here?
523
00:36:41,983 --> 00:36:43,152
Captain Yossarian
is receiving
524
00:36:43,152 --> 00:36:44,237
the Distinguished
Flying Cross, sir.
525
00:36:44,237 --> 00:36:46,408
‐ Well, I'll be damned.
526
00:36:46,408 --> 00:36:48,997
Why aren't you
wearing clothes, son?
527
00:36:48,997 --> 00:36:50,291
‐ I don't want to.
528
00:36:50,291 --> 00:36:51,753
What do you mean,
you don't want to?
529
00:36:51,753 --> 00:36:53,757
Why the hell don't you want to?
530
00:36:53,757 --> 00:36:55,510
‐ I just don't want to.
531
00:36:55,510 --> 00:36:57,138
‐ Why isn't he wearing clothes?
‐ Why isn't he wearing clothes?
532
00:36:57,138 --> 00:36:58,600
‐ A man was killed in his
plane and bled all over him.
533
00:36:58,600 --> 00:37:00,019
He swears he will never
wear a uniform again.
534
00:37:00,019 --> 00:37:01,188
‐ A man was killed in his
plane and bled all over him,
535
00:37:01,188 --> 00:37:02,942
and he's left his clothes
in the laundry.
536
00:37:02,942 --> 00:37:04,110
‐ Where are his other uniforms?
‐ In the laundry as well, sir.
537
00:37:04,110 --> 00:37:05,363
‐ What about his underwear?
‐ They're‐‐
538
00:37:05,363 --> 00:37:07,408
his underwear's
in the laundry as well, sir.
539
00:37:07,408 --> 00:37:09,914
‐ Sounds like a lot
of crap to me.
540
00:37:09,914 --> 00:37:12,126
‐ It is a lot of crap, sir.
‐ Don't worry, sir.
541
00:37:12,126 --> 00:37:14,799
I can promise you that I will
personally punish this man.
542
00:37:14,799 --> 00:37:16,761
He will be thrashed within
an inch of his life.
543
00:37:16,761 --> 00:37:18,682
‐ What the hell do I care
if he's punished or not?
544
00:37:18,682 --> 00:37:20,184
He's just won a medal,
for Christ's sake.
545
00:37:20,184 --> 00:37:22,271
‐ My sentiments exactly, sir.
546
00:37:22,271 --> 00:37:23,733
He wants to receive it
without any clothes on,
547
00:37:23,733 --> 00:37:25,319
what the hell business
is it of yours?
548
00:37:25,319 --> 00:37:26,906
Did you win a medal?
549
00:37:26,906 --> 00:37:29,369
‐ Uh, n‐no, sir,
I didn't win a medal.
550
00:37:30,539 --> 00:37:33,002
I commend
your bravery, Captain.
551
00:37:33,002 --> 00:37:34,254
What did he do?
552
00:37:34,254 --> 00:37:35,549
He blew up a bridge
in Ferrara, sir.
553
00:37:35,549 --> 00:37:37,010
Went over the target twice
under enemy fire, sir.
554
00:37:37,010 --> 00:37:39,515
‐ So you're a pilot, son?
‐ He's a bombardier, sir.
555
00:37:39,515 --> 00:37:40,851
‐ Why isn't the pilot
getting a medal?
556
00:37:40,851 --> 00:37:41,853
‐ Why isn't the pilot
getting a medal?
557
00:37:41,853 --> 00:37:43,105
‐ He died, sir.
‐ No, he didn't.
558
00:37:43,105 --> 00:37:44,274
‐ Yes, he did.
‐ No, he didn't.
559
00:37:44,274 --> 00:37:46,028
‐ Jesus Christ,
I haven't got all day.
560
00:37:46,028 --> 00:37:47,865
‐ I'm with you there, sir.
‐ You shut up.
561
00:37:47,865 --> 00:37:50,537
Soldier, for flying
back over Ferrara
562
00:37:50,537 --> 00:37:52,833
to blow up a bridge
under enemy fire,
563
00:37:52,833 --> 00:37:56,591
I hereby award you...
564
00:37:56,591 --> 00:37:59,722
the Distinguished Flying Cross.
565
00:38:03,020 --> 00:38:05,191
Good work, son.
566
00:40:07,853 --> 00:40:09,815
‐ Hi.
567
00:40:09,815 --> 00:40:13,030
I think I'm supposed
to be in this tent.
568
00:40:13,030 --> 00:40:14,992
They said I'm...
569
00:40:14,992 --> 00:40:17,539
supposed to be in Tent 12?
570
00:40:23,509 --> 00:40:25,429
Are you Captain Yossarian?
571
00:40:25,429 --> 00:40:27,851
‐ Yes, I am.
572
00:40:27,851 --> 00:40:31,066
‐ Lieutenant Newman.
573
00:40:32,068 --> 00:40:33,863
‐ Hi.
574
00:40:33,863 --> 00:40:36,284
‐ Are you okay?
575
00:41:14,570 --> 00:41:17,032
Yo‐Yo, how we looking
down there?
576
00:41:17,032 --> 00:41:19,580
Almost there.
577
00:41:23,713 --> 00:41:26,134
And...
578
00:41:27,596 --> 00:41:29,474
Release.
579
00:41:43,502 --> 00:41:45,047
And release.
580
00:41:45,047 --> 00:41:48,721
♪ Let's call it a day ♪
581
00:41:50,224 --> 00:41:51,894
‐ And release.
582
00:41:51,894 --> 00:41:55,192
♪ Let us say ♪
583
00:41:55,192 --> 00:41:59,868
♪ That we just can't pretend ♪
584
00:41:59,868 --> 00:42:04,753
♪ And we know it's the end ♪
585
00:42:04,753 --> 00:42:08,468
♪ Why delay? ♪
586
00:42:08,468 --> 00:42:14,105
♪ Let's call it a day ♪
587
00:42:15,567 --> 00:42:17,194
And release.
40730
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