Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,627 --> 00:00:04,922
Buonasera, Luigi's Pizza.
2
00:00:05,089 --> 00:00:09,385
Buonasera, it means "good evening"
in Italian.
3
00:00:09,552 --> 00:00:11,554
May I say having to explain that
to you...
4
00:00:11,721 --> 00:00:15,391
...calls into question
the authenticity of your ristorante?
5
00:00:16,058 --> 00:00:17,226
Okay, I'm out of here.
6
00:00:17,476 --> 00:00:18,894
(SPEAKS IN ITALIAN)
7
00:00:19,520 --> 00:00:22,440
Oh, for heaven's sake,
now you're being deliberately stupid.
8
00:00:23,733 --> 00:00:26,235
- Where are you going?
- I'm having dinner with Priya at Raj's.
9
00:00:26,402 --> 00:00:29,613
- Howard's gonna be there, wanna join us?
- But tonight's Thursday.
10
00:00:29,780 --> 00:00:32,700
On Thursdays everybody comes
over here and has pizza...
11
00:00:32,867 --> 00:00:36,787
...or a reasonable facsimile prepared
by someone claiming to be Luigi...
12
00:00:36,954 --> 00:00:39,540
...but who sounds suspiciously
like Jackie Chan.
13
00:00:40,750 --> 00:00:43,127
Can't we make a one-time exception
for tonight?
14
00:00:43,294 --> 00:00:46,839
We could.
We could also stop using the letter M.
15
00:00:47,006 --> 00:00:50,509
But I think that idea
is "isguided" and "oronic."
16
00:00:51,302 --> 00:00:52,636
Just come with me to Raj's.
17
00:00:52,803 --> 00:00:55,389
- Well, I don't wanna go to a party.
- It's not a party.
18
00:00:55,556 --> 00:00:58,267
It's the same group who hang out here,
hanging out there.
19
00:00:58,476 --> 00:01:01,854
I'm sorry, but five people
eating and chatting is a party.
20
00:01:02,354 --> 00:01:04,523
How come it's not a party
when we do it here?
21
00:01:04,732 --> 00:01:06,275
Because we don't throw parties.
22
00:01:07,526 --> 00:01:08,569
I don't know, Sheldon.
23
00:01:08,736 --> 00:01:11,238
I'm going to see Priya, everyone's there.
You coming?
24
00:01:11,447 --> 00:01:13,532
Well, no, sir, and do you know why?
25
00:01:13,699 --> 00:01:15,451
In a word: tradition.
26
00:01:16,494 --> 00:01:18,829
Every Thursday night
for the last eight years...
27
00:01:18,996 --> 00:01:22,792
...you and I and our friends
have gathered here in this very spot...
28
00:01:22,958 --> 00:01:25,795
...to break bread
covered with cheese and sauce...
29
00:01:26,003 --> 00:01:31,008
...discuss the issues of the day
and, yes, share a laugh or two.
30
00:01:31,175 --> 00:01:34,011
But I guess our rich heritage
means nothing to you.
31
00:01:34,970 --> 00:01:38,390
- I guess you're right. See you later.
- Wait, Leonard, wait.
32
00:01:38,599 --> 00:01:40,267
What am I going to do for dinner?
33
00:01:40,476 --> 00:01:43,521
- Come with me to Raj's and eat there.
- Well, I can't do that.
34
00:01:43,687 --> 00:01:46,774
What if he serves
haggis and blood pudding?
35
00:01:48,067 --> 00:01:50,694
I really doubt that's what he'll serve.
36
00:01:50,903 --> 00:01:51,946
But what if he does?
37
00:01:52,112 --> 00:01:56,116
I'll be obliged to dine on liver and lungs
stuffed in a sheep's stomach.
38
00:01:56,742 --> 00:02:00,996
Blood pudding is essentially the same.
I don't know why he's serving both.
39
00:02:02,039 --> 00:02:05,000
What do you wanna do?
Do you wanna come or sit here alone?
40
00:02:05,209 --> 00:02:06,836
No, I'll go to your haggis party.
41
00:02:08,128 --> 00:02:13,092
But I'm telling you, this is "adness."
This is utter and "coplete" "adness."
42
00:02:37,700 --> 00:02:39,285
SHELDON: Oh, dear.
- What?
43
00:02:39,451 --> 00:02:40,995
Raj's television.
44
00:02:41,161 --> 00:02:44,790
I just realized we're about to spend
an evening watching a plasma screen...
45
00:02:44,957 --> 00:02:48,127
...with a cluster of dead pixels
in the upper left-hand corner.
46
00:02:48,752 --> 00:02:50,963
So don't watch TV, read a book.
47
00:02:51,171 --> 00:02:54,592
And be a social pariah?
You know that's not my style.
48
00:02:56,385 --> 00:02:57,970
(SIGHS)
49
00:02:59,638 --> 00:03:02,474
The audible sigh is a show
of exasperation, right?
50
00:03:03,017 --> 00:03:04,393
Right.
51
00:03:04,560 --> 00:03:07,897
Was it about me or the dead pixels?
52
00:03:08,439 --> 00:03:10,691
Hey, you're just in time.
We made Tex-Mex.
53
00:03:10,900 --> 00:03:13,944
- Oh, sounds great.
- Oh, Indians making Tex-Mex.
54
00:03:14,111 --> 00:03:16,780
Might as well have had
the Chinese pizza.
55
00:03:18,449 --> 00:03:19,617
- Hey, you.
- Hi.
56
00:03:19,783 --> 00:03:21,035
(PRIYA CHUCKLES)
57
00:03:21,994 --> 00:03:24,496
That's gotta be fun for you, huh?
58
00:03:25,372 --> 00:03:28,876
Watching Hofstadter suck the saliva
out of your sister's mouth?
59
00:03:30,544 --> 00:03:32,922
Excuse me, before this evening
goes any further...
60
00:03:33,088 --> 00:03:35,966
...we need to decide
where everyone's going to sit.
61
00:03:36,175 --> 00:03:37,968
There's no assigned seats, Sheldon.
62
00:03:38,135 --> 00:03:40,346
Just sit anywhere,
make yourself comfortable.
63
00:03:40,512 --> 00:03:44,224
Oh, what fun.
We're like hippies at a love-in.
64
00:03:45,684 --> 00:03:48,979
- Just sit here.
- Yeah, right on, man, right on.
65
00:03:51,273 --> 00:03:57,237
Oh, look, it's Harry Potter
and 98 Percent of the Sorcerer's Stone.
66
00:03:58,113 --> 00:04:01,617
Okay, we've got fajitas
with all the fixings...
67
00:04:01,784 --> 00:04:03,160
...so you make your own.
68
00:04:03,369 --> 00:04:06,038
Oh, that's wonderful.
Dinner, some assembly required.
69
00:04:07,915 --> 00:04:10,584
- Do you want a margarita, Sheldon?
- What...? A margarita?
70
00:04:10,751 --> 00:04:13,003
Where are we? What is happening?
71
00:04:15,756 --> 00:04:18,300
Oh, hey, Sheldon. What can I get you?
72
00:04:18,509 --> 00:04:20,260
Water, neat...
73
00:04:20,427 --> 00:04:22,721
...with a little umbrella.
74
00:04:22,930 --> 00:04:24,556
Where are all your friends?
75
00:04:24,765 --> 00:04:27,810
Sadly, Penny, this evening,
I am The Dark Knight...
76
00:04:27,977 --> 00:04:30,062
...roaming these mean streets alone.
77
00:04:30,270 --> 00:04:35,734
A windbreaker for my cape
and a stern expression for my cowl.
78
00:04:38,070 --> 00:04:39,446
Okay.
79
00:04:40,572 --> 00:04:43,242
Excuse me. Isn't this the point...
80
00:04:43,409 --> 00:04:46,745
...where the world-weary barkeep
absent-mindedly wipes down the bar...
81
00:04:46,912 --> 00:04:49,415
...and coaxes the woes
out of the troubled patron?
82
00:04:50,582 --> 00:04:54,169
Well, I was getting your stupid umbrella,
but all right.
83
00:04:55,754 --> 00:04:58,215
What's troubling you, buddy?
84
00:05:00,300 --> 00:05:03,470
I don't think your heart's in it,
but since you asked...
85
00:05:03,637 --> 00:05:06,765
Apparently, because Leonard is dating
Raj's sister...
86
00:05:06,932 --> 00:05:09,643
...we're all forced to hang out
at his apartment.
87
00:05:09,810 --> 00:05:12,438
- Oh, the horror.
- Yeah. Indeed.
88
00:05:12,604 --> 00:05:14,982
Yeah, at one point,
Raj put on reggae music...
89
00:05:15,149 --> 00:05:17,443
...and his sister took off her shoes.
90
00:05:17,609 --> 00:05:19,778
It was like the last days of Caligula.
91
00:05:21,947 --> 00:05:24,575
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
92
00:05:24,742 --> 00:05:26,910
Oh, I have to get this.
93
00:05:27,077 --> 00:05:28,328
Umbrella?
94
00:05:29,747 --> 00:05:31,123
(SIGHS)
95
00:05:31,290 --> 00:05:34,209
I wonder
what she's exasperated about?
96
00:05:34,793 --> 00:05:35,836
Hello?
97
00:05:36,003 --> 00:05:37,337
Sheldon, are you all right?
98
00:05:37,504 --> 00:05:40,049
When last we spoke,
you were gonna take a taxi home from Raj's.
99
00:05:40,215 --> 00:05:43,302
But according to Facebook, you just
checked in at the Cheesecake Factory.
100
00:05:43,510 --> 00:05:44,845
Yes, I was in a taxi...
101
00:05:45,012 --> 00:05:48,724
...but the driver didn't look at all
like the photograph on his license.
102
00:05:48,891 --> 00:05:51,310
So I leapt out and ran for it.
103
00:05:51,852 --> 00:05:53,520
Wise.
104
00:05:53,687 --> 00:05:57,691
Here you go, just like recovering
alcoholics drink in the Caribbean.
105
00:05:58,233 --> 00:05:59,735
AMY:
Hi, bestie.
106
00:05:59,902 --> 00:06:01,820
Oh, hi, Amy. How you been?
107
00:06:02,029 --> 00:06:06,283
Fine. From this angle,
I can see up your nose.
108
00:06:06,492 --> 00:06:09,036
Yeah, it's a great time
to be alive, isn't it?
109
00:06:09,244 --> 00:06:12,998
Don't worry, my problems can wait
while you two hens finish your clucking.
110
00:06:14,541 --> 00:06:17,544
Look, Sheldon, Leonard is dating Priya.
She's staying with Raj.
111
00:06:17,711 --> 00:06:21,048
That means you're all probably gonna
be hanging out there more.
112
00:06:21,215 --> 00:06:23,175
AMY:
Penny, sorry you got dragged into this.
113
00:06:23,383 --> 00:06:25,552
I know you're devastated
that your ex-boyfriend...
114
00:06:25,719 --> 00:06:29,807
...has found an exciting new lover
with flawless caramel-colored skin.
115
00:06:29,973 --> 00:06:32,226
Okay, I'm not upset
about Leonard and Priya.
116
00:06:32,434 --> 00:06:34,728
Your flaring nostrils indicate otherwise.
117
00:06:36,230 --> 00:06:38,232
Cluck, cluck, cluck.
118
00:06:39,233 --> 00:06:41,026
Sheldon, look at me.
119
00:06:41,193 --> 00:06:44,905
I think it's time to face the fact that
Leonard is the nucleus of your group.
120
00:06:45,072 --> 00:06:46,657
Where he goes, the group goes.
121
00:06:46,865 --> 00:06:49,660
Leonard, the nucleus?
That makes no sense.
122
00:06:49,827 --> 00:06:53,330
I'm the whimsical elf
that everyone looks to for a good time.
123
00:06:54,706 --> 00:06:59,378
I'm not saying that you're not fun.
You're the most fun person I know.
124
00:07:01,004 --> 00:07:03,632
A lot of people
think I'm fun to be around.
125
00:07:03,799 --> 00:07:05,968
Don't be needy, bestie.
126
00:07:06,176 --> 00:07:08,846
That's probably part
of what chased Leonard away.
127
00:07:09,972 --> 00:07:13,350
What I am saying, Sheldon,
is that your group is Leonard-centric.
128
00:07:13,892 --> 00:07:16,228
If it were a town,
it would be Leonardville.
129
00:07:16,395 --> 00:07:19,106
If it were an Islamic nation,
Leonardstan.
130
00:07:19,273 --> 00:07:21,525
If it were the birthplace
of motion pictures...
131
00:07:21,692 --> 00:07:24,319
...we'd all be singing
"Hooray for Leonardwood."
132
00:07:24,486 --> 00:07:26,530
Oh, I got a one.
If you guys were a band...
133
00:07:26,697 --> 00:07:28,490
...you'd be called
Leonard and the Leonards.
134
00:07:28,657 --> 00:07:30,409
(CHUCKLES)
135
00:07:31,410 --> 00:07:32,828
So needy.
136
00:07:36,748 --> 00:07:39,960
- What you doing?
- I'm setting out snacks.
137
00:07:40,127 --> 00:07:43,463
You do realize everyone's eating
at Raj's again tonight.
138
00:07:43,630 --> 00:07:47,259
I didn't say the snacks were for you,
now, did I, Nosy Rosie?
139
00:07:51,722 --> 00:07:54,474
- You're having people over?
- Yes.
140
00:07:54,641 --> 00:07:57,811
Must be killing you, wondering who.
Fine, I'll tell you.
141
00:07:57,978 --> 00:08:01,899
It's Stuart from the comic book store,
Barry Kripke from the university...
142
00:08:02,065 --> 00:08:06,904
...Penny's ex-boyfriend, Zack,
and TV's LeVar Burton.
143
00:08:08,071 --> 00:08:10,407
Really? LeVar Burton's coming here?
144
00:08:10,616 --> 00:08:12,784
Possibly, I tweeted him.
145
00:08:14,369 --> 00:08:16,955
Okay, well, tell him
I loved him on Star Trek.
146
00:08:17,164 --> 00:08:20,334
Please, Leonard,
stop trying to horn in on my new friends.
147
00:08:21,418 --> 00:08:22,878
Of course, good night.
148
00:08:23,086 --> 00:08:25,005
- Leonard.
- Yeah?
149
00:08:26,215 --> 00:08:28,842
We had a good run, you and I.
150
00:08:30,928 --> 00:08:33,222
Okay.
151
00:08:33,430 --> 00:08:35,265
But change is a part of life.
152
00:08:35,933 --> 00:08:37,184
It certainly is.
153
00:08:38,227 --> 00:08:39,770
Okay.
154
00:08:40,312 --> 00:08:41,355
I have guests coming.
155
00:08:41,521 --> 00:08:44,566
I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask you
to leave now.
156
00:08:47,444 --> 00:08:50,530
- I am leaving.
- Don't make this harder than it is.
157
00:08:51,657 --> 00:08:54,076
- Goodbye, Sheldon.
- And goodbye to you, sir.
158
00:09:01,792 --> 00:09:02,834
He'll be back.
159
00:09:03,001 --> 00:09:05,545
LEONARD:
Of course I'll be back, I live here!
160
00:09:19,142 --> 00:09:22,271
Well, it would appear
LeVar Burton won't be joining us.
161
00:09:22,437 --> 00:09:24,856
So, um, let's get started.
162
00:09:25,023 --> 00:09:28,735
Uh, I thought we'd begin by going
around the room, introducing ourselves...
163
00:09:28,944 --> 00:09:31,238
...and saying a little bit
about why we're here.
164
00:09:31,405 --> 00:09:33,198
Okay, ahem, uh, I'm Sheldon.
165
00:09:33,365 --> 00:09:36,702
Uh, for readers of the New England
Journal of High Energy Physics...
166
00:09:36,868 --> 00:09:38,954
...I need no introduction.
167
00:09:39,121 --> 00:09:43,250
If you're not familiar with that,
there's a free copy in your goody bag.
168
00:09:46,545 --> 00:09:48,255
Stuart?
169
00:09:48,797 --> 00:09:51,466
Um, ahem, hi, I'm Stuart.
170
00:09:51,633 --> 00:09:53,343
I run a comic book store...
171
00:09:53,510 --> 00:09:57,180
...which, for financial reasons,
I'm currently living in.
172
00:09:57,639 --> 00:10:02,728
And I guess what I'm hoping for most
out of tonight is a hot shower.
173
00:10:03,729 --> 00:10:06,273
That's very nice, Stuart. Zack?
174
00:10:06,690 --> 00:10:08,942
I'm Zack and I'm, uh...
175
00:10:09,860 --> 00:10:12,070
Uh...
176
00:10:13,238 --> 00:10:14,990
Could you come back to me?
177
00:10:15,657 --> 00:10:18,577
Of course. Barry?
178
00:10:18,785 --> 00:10:22,205
I'm Barry Kripke and I'm here
because you told me there was a raffle.
179
00:10:24,458 --> 00:10:26,001
When is the raffle?
180
00:10:26,209 --> 00:10:28,295
Patience, patience, Barry, the waffle...
Ahem.
181
00:10:28,462 --> 00:10:30,589
The raffle...
182
00:10:30,756 --> 00:10:35,635
...is the grand finale to an evening-long
festival of fun and folly.
183
00:10:35,844 --> 00:10:38,930
- One more question...
- Yes, you must be present to win.
184
00:10:39,931 --> 00:10:43,018
Okay, I'm ready. I'm Zack and I'm, uh...
185
00:10:43,852 --> 00:10:45,729
Oh, crap, why is this so hard?
186
00:10:50,692 --> 00:10:51,735
PENNY: Oh, hey.
- Hi.
187
00:10:51,902 --> 00:10:54,905
- Yo, P-Dawg.
- Ha, ha. What's up?
188
00:10:55,113 --> 00:10:57,532
We're here to kidnap you
for a girls' night out.
189
00:10:57,699 --> 00:11:01,495
Parenthetical, the term "kidnap"
is being used playfully.
190
00:11:01,995 --> 00:11:03,246
I kind of figured that.
191
00:11:03,413 --> 00:11:06,416
Good, now put this pillowcase
over your head.
192
00:11:07,918 --> 00:11:09,336
No.
193
00:11:09,503 --> 00:11:12,839
She used to be much more fun
until Leonard punched her in the heart.
194
00:11:14,841 --> 00:11:18,387
We thought you might wanna go out,
have a good time, maybe go dancing.
195
00:11:18,595 --> 00:11:21,056
Oh, gee, thanks,
but I'm not really in the mood.
196
00:11:21,264 --> 00:11:23,100
You do understand it will distract you...
197
00:11:23,266 --> 00:11:25,769
...from obsessing
over the rich variety of sweet loving...
198
00:11:25,936 --> 00:11:29,398
...your ex-boyfriend is receiving
from the fiery jewel of Mumbai.
199
00:11:29,564 --> 00:11:30,816
(SIGHS)
200
00:11:30,982 --> 00:11:33,318
Okay, look, if I agree to go out
with you guys...
201
00:11:33,485 --> 00:11:36,071
...will you stop pestering me
about Leonard and Priya?
202
00:11:36,279 --> 00:11:37,656
- Yes.
- Sure.
203
00:11:37,864 --> 00:11:40,367
All right, I'll go change.
Come on in.
204
00:11:40,534 --> 00:11:44,329
If you'd have let me bring chloroform, we
wouldn't have had all this jibber jabber.
205
00:11:47,791 --> 00:11:51,461
Anyway, after snowboarding,
I go to the lodge and get in the Jacuzzi.
206
00:11:51,628 --> 00:11:54,798
There's no one around,
so naturally I'm free-balling it.
207
00:11:56,258 --> 00:11:58,593
Next thing I know,
this beautiful chick shows up.
208
00:11:58,760 --> 00:12:01,096
Drunk out of her skull,
wants to get in with me.
209
00:12:01,304 --> 00:12:05,684
Question. Was it a Jacuzzi or a hot tub?
210
00:12:05,892 --> 00:12:09,813
- Really, that's your question?
- What's the difference?
211
00:12:10,021 --> 00:12:13,984
Jacuzzi is a commercial brand,
hot tub is the generic term...
212
00:12:14,192 --> 00:12:18,822
...i.e., all Jacuzzis are hot tubs
but not all hot tubs are Jacuzzis.
213
00:12:19,531 --> 00:12:23,827
Is that like all thumbs are fingers
but not all fingers are thumbs?
214
00:12:24,661 --> 00:12:26,788
Surprisingly, yes.
215
00:12:27,372 --> 00:12:29,541
Nice.
216
00:12:29,708 --> 00:12:31,960
Now, what exactly are toes?
217
00:12:34,004 --> 00:12:36,089
Can you please
get back to the drunk girl?
218
00:12:36,256 --> 00:12:38,758
I'd like something to think about
in the shower.
219
00:12:39,384 --> 00:12:40,886
Oh, yeah, right.
220
00:12:41,052 --> 00:12:43,430
She takes off all of her clothes,
climbs in the hot tub.
221
00:12:43,597 --> 00:12:46,850
- And the first thing I notice...
- The water level rose.
222
00:12:48,727 --> 00:12:50,312
- No.
- Well, of course it did.
223
00:12:50,479 --> 00:12:53,398
It's said that Archimedes,
the ancient Greek mathematician...
224
00:12:53,565 --> 00:12:57,235
...discovered the principle
of displacement while taking a bath.
225
00:12:58,445 --> 00:13:01,656
Terrific. Go ahead, Zack.
Naked drunk girl, free-balling, continue.
226
00:13:01,823 --> 00:13:03,283
Wait, forgive me...
227
00:13:03,450 --> 00:13:05,911
...but I think you'll find
my story is more interesting.
228
00:13:06,119 --> 00:13:08,455
Does yours have wet breasts in it?
229
00:13:09,748 --> 00:13:11,833
Better, it has a gold crown.
230
00:13:12,042 --> 00:13:14,753
You see, the king wondered
how much gold was in it...
231
00:13:14,920 --> 00:13:18,089
...and charged Archimedes
with coming up with the solution.
232
00:13:18,256 --> 00:13:21,885
The crown was irregularly shaped, there
was no way to determine its volume.
233
00:13:22,093 --> 00:13:24,721
But while bathing,
Archimedes realized...
234
00:13:24,888 --> 00:13:29,851
...he could immerse the crown
and measure the amount the water rose.
235
00:13:32,938 --> 00:13:34,898
So long story short, I nailed her.
236
00:13:39,986 --> 00:13:42,197
When he finished,
he shouted, "Eureka."
237
00:13:42,405 --> 00:13:44,074
No, I always shout, "Holy moly."
238
00:13:45,575 --> 00:13:48,286
Don't know why, just do.
239
00:13:50,497 --> 00:13:54,042
All right, that concludes the getting-
to-know-you portion of the evening.
240
00:13:54,251 --> 00:13:56,795
Now who's ready to play
some vintage video games?
241
00:13:56,962 --> 00:13:58,713
Tonight's selections include...
242
00:13:58,922 --> 00:14:02,259
...ColecoVision's
"Smurf: Rescue in Gargamel's Castle"...
243
00:14:02,425 --> 00:14:04,344
...Atari's "Cookie Monster Munch"...
244
00:14:04,511 --> 00:14:09,599
...and for you
text-adventure aficionados, "Zork."
245
00:14:09,766 --> 00:14:12,561
(IN HIGH-PITCH VOICE)
"Pick me, pick me, I'm fun."
246
00:14:15,981 --> 00:14:18,483
That all sucks the big hairy meatball.
247
00:14:19,025 --> 00:14:21,319
How about I get the karaoke machine
out of my car...
248
00:14:21,486 --> 00:14:23,989
...get plastered
and blow the roof off this place?
249
00:14:24,197 --> 00:14:26,783
- Great, I'll make a beer run.
- And I'll take a shower.
250
00:14:26,950 --> 00:14:29,953
- We'll meet back here in 15.
- Check.
251
00:14:31,162 --> 00:14:33,790
(DOORS CLOSE)
252
00:14:33,957 --> 00:14:36,126
I'm unhappy.
253
00:14:37,794 --> 00:14:40,839
This is delicious.
Where did you learn to make chili?
254
00:14:41,006 --> 00:14:44,217
When I was at university in England,
my flatmate was from Texas.
255
00:14:44,426 --> 00:14:46,636
I hope she wasn't anything
like my flatmate from Texas.
256
00:14:46,803 --> 00:14:47,846
(CHUCKLES)
257
00:14:48,638 --> 00:14:50,307
Sheldon is a bit quirky, isn't he?
258
00:14:50,515 --> 00:14:55,353
Oh, please, that crazy bastard is looking
at quirky in the rearview mirror.
259
00:14:58,148 --> 00:14:59,983
Did you know that per our
roommate agreement...
260
00:15:00,150 --> 00:15:02,235
...I have to wash my feet
before I get in the shower?
261
00:15:02,444 --> 00:15:05,655
And not in the sink,
we each have special buckets.
262
00:15:05,822 --> 00:15:06,865
(CHUCKLES)
263
00:15:07,032 --> 00:15:10,160
Raj, did you tell your sister about the time
Sheldon got punched by Bill Gates?
264
00:15:10,327 --> 00:15:12,370
- Oh, God, you're kidding.
RAJESH: Ha, ha. Nope.
265
00:15:12,537 --> 00:15:15,957
Gates gave a speech at the university,
Sheldon went up to him and said:
266
00:15:16,124 --> 00:15:18,752
"Maybe if you weren't so distracted
by sick children in Africa...
267
00:15:18,918 --> 00:15:21,504
...you could have put a little
more thought into Windows Vista."
268
00:15:21,671 --> 00:15:23,632
(ALL LAUGHING)
269
00:15:24,549 --> 00:15:26,509
Bam, right in the nose.
270
00:15:27,302 --> 00:15:29,929
Made me proud to own a PC.
271
00:15:30,138 --> 00:15:31,806
I'd like to propose a toast.
272
00:15:31,973 --> 00:15:34,684
To a rare and wonderful
Sheldon-free evening.
273
00:15:34,893 --> 00:15:36,811
LEONARD: Hear, hear.
HOWARD: Cheers.
274
00:15:38,229 --> 00:15:40,190
That's the first time
we've ever done that...
275
00:15:40,357 --> 00:15:43,568
...without having Sheldon tell us
why it's called a toast.
276
00:15:43,777 --> 00:15:45,654
And why is it called a toast?
277
00:15:45,820 --> 00:15:48,907
Oh, the ancient Romans
put spiced toast in their punch bowls.
278
00:15:51,576 --> 00:15:53,745
Sheldon tells it better.
279
00:15:55,121 --> 00:15:56,998
- He kind of does.
- Yeah.
280
00:15:59,125 --> 00:16:01,670
Oh, hell, I miss him.
281
00:16:05,090 --> 00:16:08,593
- Where do you guys wanna go dancing?
- We were hoping you'd know a place.
282
00:16:08,802 --> 00:16:10,679
Yes, perhaps somewhere
packed tightly...
283
00:16:10,845 --> 00:16:13,515
...with young beautiful bodies,
sweating and writhing...
284
00:16:13,682 --> 00:16:16,726
...against each other
in a glorious orgy of the flesh.
285
00:16:16,935 --> 00:16:19,229
Oh, yeah, I know that place.
286
00:16:20,438 --> 00:16:21,523
What do you think?
287
00:16:21,731 --> 00:16:26,194
That should display enough bosom
to attract a new mate or a hungry infant.
288
00:16:26,778 --> 00:16:29,280
Okay, let's go through this
one more time.
289
00:16:29,447 --> 00:16:31,324
Just because Leonard
has a new girlfriend...
290
00:16:31,491 --> 00:16:33,785
...doesn't mean I need to hook up
with some guy.
291
00:16:33,993 --> 00:16:37,080
- But you could if you wanted to, right?
- Well, yeah, I guess.
292
00:16:37,288 --> 00:16:39,124
Pick out the hottest guy
in the room...
293
00:16:39,290 --> 00:16:41,543
...take him home,
do unspeakable things to him.
294
00:16:41,710 --> 00:16:42,836
Kick him to the curb...
295
00:16:43,002 --> 00:16:46,381
...with a smile on his face
and teeth marks on his heinie?
296
00:16:48,133 --> 00:16:49,217
More or less.
297
00:16:50,677 --> 00:16:53,012
What's that like?
298
00:16:53,179 --> 00:16:55,348
PENNY: I don't know,
it's fun while you're doing it.
299
00:16:55,515 --> 00:17:00,019
And then after it's mostly embarrassment,
self-loathing and regret.
300
00:17:00,228 --> 00:17:04,607
I would take that deal all day long.
301
00:17:04,774 --> 00:17:06,776
PENNY: Yeah, well,
it's not gonna happen tonight.
302
00:17:06,943 --> 00:17:08,820
You know, for the first time in life...
303
00:17:08,987 --> 00:17:11,364
...I'm not in a relationship
and I'm totally okay with it.
304
00:17:11,531 --> 00:17:14,868
You know, if being on your own
is new to you, I'd be happy to share...
305
00:17:15,034 --> 00:17:19,622
...some tension-relieving techniques
for ladies I've perfected over the years.
306
00:17:20,540 --> 00:17:24,043
For example,
do you have an electric toothbrush?
307
00:17:25,628 --> 00:17:28,506
PENNY: Uh, no.
- You should get one.
308
00:17:30,300 --> 00:17:31,801
What's that?
309
00:17:31,968 --> 00:17:35,430
It appears to be something preserved
between two pieces of acrylic.
310
00:17:35,638 --> 00:17:39,184
PENNY: Oh, it's a snowflake from the north
pole. Leonard gave it to me last year.
311
00:17:39,350 --> 00:17:41,603
Oh, God, that is so romantic.
312
00:17:41,811 --> 00:17:43,688
Yeah, it was.
313
00:17:44,230 --> 00:17:46,232
Leonard's really one of a kind.
314
00:17:46,441 --> 00:17:50,111
Saying that while holding a snowflake
is a little heavy-handed, don't you think?
315
00:17:50,779 --> 00:17:52,363
Let me see that.
316
00:17:55,700 --> 00:17:57,786
Oh, screw it.
I can deal with a little self-loathing.
317
00:17:57,952 --> 00:18:00,455
Let's go find me a heinie to bite.
318
00:18:01,331 --> 00:18:03,041
Outstanding. And if we fail...
319
00:18:03,208 --> 00:18:07,587
...we always can stop at CVS
and pick you out a nice toothbrush.
320
00:18:08,087 --> 00:18:10,757
I call mine Gerard.
321
00:18:12,884 --> 00:18:15,094
That's kind of creepy.
322
00:18:17,347 --> 00:18:19,974
(SINGING)
Don't go breaking my heart
323
00:18:20,725 --> 00:18:22,393
I couldn't if I tried
324
00:18:24,562 --> 00:18:27,857
Oh, honey, if I get restless
325
00:18:28,024 --> 00:18:30,527
Baby, you're not that kind
326
00:18:33,655 --> 00:18:36,241
Don't go breaking my heart
327
00:18:37,200 --> 00:18:40,328
Anybody do
"Walking on Sunshine" yet?
328
00:18:41,621 --> 00:18:43,915
- No.
- Dibs.
329
00:18:47,377 --> 00:18:51,506
I'm sorry, Sheldon bought a loom
and learned how to weave?
330
00:18:51,714 --> 00:18:55,426
He actually got pretty good.
He made us all matching serapes.
331
00:18:55,635 --> 00:18:58,513
I still wear mine
when there's a nip in the air.
332
00:18:59,472 --> 00:19:02,684
Now, was this before or after
he adopted the 25 cats?
333
00:19:02,892 --> 00:19:05,562
Long before the cats.
I think it was around the time...
334
00:19:05,728 --> 00:19:09,482
...he tried to declare our apartment
a sovereign nation.
335
00:19:09,649 --> 00:19:12,068
I still have some of the currency.
336
00:19:12,235 --> 00:19:13,278
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
337
00:19:13,444 --> 00:19:15,530
SHELDON:
All my friends. All my friends.
338
00:19:16,447 --> 00:19:18,658
All my friends.
339
00:19:20,368 --> 00:19:24,205
I think it's like Beetlejuice.
We said his name too many times.
340
00:19:26,624 --> 00:19:28,585
- Come on in.
- Thank you.
341
00:19:28,793 --> 00:19:30,920
Hey, I thought you were
with your new buddies.
342
00:19:31,129 --> 00:19:34,716
I had to leave.
They were having fun wrong.
343
00:19:35,842 --> 00:19:38,177
- Come here, Sheldon, sit with me.
- Thank you.
344
00:19:38,344 --> 00:19:41,848
Would you like some homemade chili?
345
00:19:42,015 --> 00:19:43,224
Are there beans in it?
346
00:19:44,058 --> 00:19:46,019
- Yes.
- Oh, then it's not chili.
347
00:19:46,185 --> 00:19:48,229
Real chili has no beans in it.
348
00:19:48,396 --> 00:19:52,775
But you're from a foreign land,
so your ignorance is forgiven.
349
00:19:54,152 --> 00:19:58,239
- Sheldon, do you want some or not?
- Yes, please.
350
00:19:58,907 --> 00:20:01,743
Your girlfriend's
a little short-tempered.
351
00:20:01,910 --> 00:20:04,787
I'd like to propose a toast.
352
00:20:04,996 --> 00:20:07,123
To friends, no matter how quirky.
353
00:20:07,332 --> 00:20:09,334
ALL:
Cheers.
354
00:20:10,043 --> 00:20:13,796
Priya, do you know
why this is called a toast?
355
00:20:13,963 --> 00:20:15,214
Actually, I do.
356
00:20:15,381 --> 00:20:19,469
I believe the Romans used to put
spiced toast in their punch bowls.
357
00:20:20,261 --> 00:20:22,597
She's also a bit of a know-it-all.
358
00:20:24,682 --> 00:20:25,683
Mm.
359
00:20:25,850 --> 00:20:28,603
This is good. Whatever it is.
360
00:20:34,776 --> 00:20:37,278
(SINGING)
I'm walking on sunshine
361
00:20:37,487 --> 00:20:38,738
Whoa
362
00:20:38,905 --> 00:20:41,282
- I'm walking on sunshine
- Whoa
363
00:20:41,449 --> 00:20:42,492
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
364
00:20:42,659 --> 00:20:44,786
Hello, I...
365
00:20:47,664 --> 00:20:49,832
Oh, I don't think so.
366
00:20:51,668 --> 00:20:54,337
I am so done with Twitter.
30052
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof