Original subtitles

WAY DOWN MEXICO WAY

"Pass the Old El Grasso,

taste the old South West".

- Pass the Old El Grasso. - Pass the Old El Crasso.

- Passion of the West. - Hey Beavis.

Pass the Old El Crasso.

Change it, dude.

Hey guys! Welcome back to Video Wonderland.

This guy is a choad smoker.

They all are.

And here is a classic that you definitely won't hear on Mexican radio.

Wall of Voodoo's "Mexican Radio".

- It's a message, dude. - A sign from our master.

I like when those bull's horns tear open a guy's stomach.

- And you can see his guts. - Yeah.

One day in school, when I was, like, paying attention,

they were teaching us about how cows have four separate butts.

They can, like, digest their food in each butt.

And they spit it up. And they, like, chew their crud.

That would be cool if we had, like, four butts.

- I mean, like, four butts each. - Yeah.

Than we would have, like, seven butts all together.

That would be cool.

Yes! These guys rock!

That would be cool,

if that guy jumped off the stage and nobody caught him.

And he smashed his head on the floor.

Yeah, yeah.

And then his... then his head would crack open.

And there'd be, like, blood everywhere and brains.

That would be cool.

Yeah, what if somebody started slipping around on his blood and brains.

And then he cracked his head open.

And then everybody was slipping around on blood.

Yeah, cracking their heads open.

That's like that movie.

Where that guy was riding in that car and his, like, head exploded.

But it was all out of focus.

That sucks.

Hey Beavis, there's too many dudes in this video.

Yeah, there's no chicks in sweaty t-shirts.

Let's see if we can get scrambled porno flicks on UHF.

That would be cool.

Thanks for taking us to Mexico, Dave.

This ride ain't free, boys.

Remember, I got business down there.

And you are part of the management team.

This is cool.

Yeah.

You boys ever been to Mexico before?

Well, ain't no law down there. It's every man for himself.

They take no prisoners.

Well, actually they take a few. And they torture 'em.

Cool.

Yeah, they don't care what you do.

Until you cross 'em.

It's a whole different world down there.

We can buy fireworks, right? Like, M-80's and stuff?

Fireworks, guns, white slaves, endangered species.

Hell, they got everything down there.

Did he say fireworks?

We're almost there.

Cool.

Okay we'll meet back here in five hours.

Hey gringo! Hey gringo, I kick your ass.

Let's go get some M-80's.

Cool.

Fireworks?

Fireworks?

M-80's?

Firecrackers?

Fireworks?

These people are stupid.

Yeah.

Two tacos.

One.

- He wants a buck. - Why didn't he say so?

Here, doggy. Here, boy.

Here you go.

- Here, doggy. - Go for it.

Pass the Old El Paso.

Cool.

- Water. - Water.

We have excellent water here in Mexico!

Is this foreign?

Yeah.

Check it out, Beavis.

She's got money on her head.

Yeah, money is cool.

She's gonna take all that money on her head.

And go play video games.

On her horse.

- Yeah. Is this Paula Habdula? - Yeah.

Is this video about Jesus?

Yeah, Christ is cool.

- Yes! - Cool!

Yeah!

Chains and chicks.

- That's more like it! - Yeah.

Sluts are cool.

Hey Beavis, have you ever drank a beer?

- Yeah - Oh yeah? Where'd you get it?

This, like, guy gave it to me.

You haven't drank a beer. Lying wuss.

I should, like, join this band.

Yeah, these chicks would talk to us.

They'd talk to me.

Then they'd tell you to get your sorry ass out of there.

Yeah, rock n' roll is cool.

Whoa!

- Hey Butt-Head? - Yeah?

Cool, dude.

Check this out.

Mexico is cool.

She wants something.

Is that Dianne Reeves?

Yeah.

Depeche Mode is French for "we're wussies".

Yeah.

Don't feel me, dude.

You can see parts of her thingies.

"This is the morning of our love".

- Yes! - Yes!

Yes! Yes!

No! No! Show the chick.

- Yes! Yes! Yes! - Yes! Yes!

- No! No! No! - No! No! No!

This sucks!

He's looking at you, Beavis.

He wants you.

No way.

Tattoos are pretty cool.

For a wussy.

We can't leave Mexico without fireworks, dude.

- Check it out. - Cool.

That game was cool.

Rico.

Suave.

Rico.

Suave.

Whoa.

Rottoro, burritos, tacos.

Rabbaddadda.

Yeah, guacamole.

That was cool.

Hey Butt-Head, what's a gigolo?

That's, like, one of those really fat dudes.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Change it.

If I got a hat like that.

I could be a lead singer.

I would be cool.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

This is stupid.

Yeah, I like the fire,

but they need some chicks in tight shorts.

Then it would be cool.

Yeah, with close-ups on their butt.

Yeah.

Yes!

It's about time they play something cool.

Yeah.

This guy kicks ass.

- This guy looks like Jesus. - Yeah.

Christ is cool.

Whoa, Seattle kicks ass.

Yeah. Is everybody in Seattle cool?

Yeah, if you go to Seattle anybody you see is cool.

- We should go, dude. - Yeah, yeah.

That's that dude from the Spin Doctors.

He jams with Soundgarden sometimes.

Stop! Hey, gringo!

Come on, get in!

Stop! Stop! Gringo! Gringo! Hey, gringo!

Now it's time for you guys to earn your keep.

Look in the glovebox.

Oh, no! Dave is gonna boof us.

Time to fill 'em, boys.

I can't fill that.

With these, dork!

Pills, cool!

All this stuff is legal in Mexico,

and it's cheap too if you know the right people.

Border's coming up. Better swallow those rubbers, boys.

Make sure you tie 'em a couple of times.

It's a rough ride through the digestive tract.

Cool!

You boys did remember to tie up those condoms,

before you swallowed them, right?

You boys got some identification?

ID? You got ID?

No.

Get out of the car. All of you.

So, you thought you'd come down to Mexico,

and pick up a couple of immigrants, huh?

Smuggle some illegals in, huh? Is that your game?

These guys live in my town. They're Americans.

What's the capital of Texas, son? Huh?

I said, what's the capital of Texas?

It's Austin, man.

Let him go.

- What? - They are obviously Americans.

Mexicans know the capital of Texas.

Mexicans would care that they're being interrogated by the border patrol.

Those two are as American as they come.

Butthole.

No way.

God bless America.

Yes!

This kicks-ass.

Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!

Brian Johnson looks like he's taking a dump.

Yeah, he's constipated, 'cause he is old.

Hey Beavis, you think we're on, like, a highway to hell?

Yeah.

These guys dress cool.

Yeah, they always wear the same thing.

Yeah.

Hey, we always wear the same thing.

Yeah.

I had this shirt on for six months.

Yeah, I had this shirt on for seven months.

That was cool.

What if you lit one of these in Dave's butt?

That would be cool.

Peckerwood.

I can't believe he made us walk back from the border.

Mexico sucks.

Whoa. Special defects.

Hey, that's that dude that works down at Boot Warehouse.

No way, that dude works at Leadership Dodge.

On Central, half of mile north of Walnut.

Hey, that was a wipe.

Yeah, an asswipe.

- Yeah. - Yeah.

Hey Butt-Head, I heard these guys are bilingual.

Yeah, these guys are all sexual perverts.

That dude in the back, he's got two linguals.

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