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1
00:00:13,130 --> 00:00:15,405
Graham?
2
00:00:23,530 --> 00:00:25,760
(PANTING)
3
00:00:25,970 --> 00:00:27,801
I am like a man demented.
4
00:00:34,370 --> 00:00:36,201
(MOANING)
5
00:00:55,610 --> 00:00:58,170
Oh, Doctor, we are playing with fire.
6
00:01:00,490 --> 00:01:01,718
I am not.
7
00:01:09,970 --> 00:01:12,643
Might I...take a tuft?
8
00:01:14,130 --> 00:01:15,882
To keep you with me, always.
9
00:01:21,290 --> 00:01:22,689
(SCISSORS CLIPPING)
10
00:01:34,850 --> 00:01:35,919
(TWIG SNAPS)
11
00:01:36,010 --> 00:01:37,045
Oh!
12
00:01:40,970 --> 00:01:42,039
DR FOGGERTY: Oh!
13
00:01:42,130 --> 00:01:43,848
(BOTH LAUGHING)
14
00:01:44,370 --> 00:01:46,964
Tis only our limping Cupid.
15
00:01:51,530 --> 00:01:53,725
I wish I could lie with thee forever.
16
00:01:55,490 --> 00:01:57,924
Nuzzling thy nectar nook.
17
00:02:02,570 --> 00:02:03,559
(MOANS)
18
00:02:22,690 --> 00:02:24,328
HESTHER: Graham?
19
00:02:27,370 --> 00:02:30,009
I... Oh, you were pressing.
20
00:02:31,930 --> 00:02:34,398
-Tis a new flower for your herbarium?
-Mmm-hmm.
21
00:02:35,770 --> 00:02:40,446
Oh, my Graham, you are tearful.
What burdens your heart so?
22
00:02:42,130 --> 00:02:46,760
just the...sick and the needy, Hesther.
23
00:02:47,930 --> 00:02:50,205
I so wish I could heal them all.
24
00:02:53,370 --> 00:02:54,519
Hesther!
25
00:02:54,610 --> 00:02:58,523
You are a good man, Graham.
Such a good man.
26
00:02:59,530 --> 00:03:01,088
To think I doubted you.
27
00:03:03,650 --> 00:03:05,925
-Doubted me?
-I am ashamed.
28
00:03:06,850 --> 00:03:09,603
I have fallen prey in my darkest hour
29
00:03:09,690 --> 00:03:12,887
to the notion that you...
30
00:03:12,970 --> 00:03:16,849
no longer find me...desirable.
31
00:03:18,650 --> 00:03:19,639
I...
32
00:03:22,650 --> 00:03:26,768
And you have conjured
some fevered notion
33
00:03:26,850 --> 00:03:29,239
that I am eaten up with lust
for another
34
00:03:29,330 --> 00:03:31,480
and wake each hour
with sticky britches?
35
00:03:33,490 --> 00:03:35,799
No! No.
36
00:03:36,770 --> 00:03:39,967
It is just that I have had my hair
quite different for over a week
37
00:03:41,410 --> 00:03:43,526
and yet you have remained silent.
38
00:03:44,530 --> 00:03:48,728
Oh... Oh, no, I do see it now.
39
00:03:49,530 --> 00:03:50,883
You have...
40
00:03:52,650 --> 00:03:53,765
grey-ened it?
41
00:03:55,610 --> 00:03:57,601
-(SOBS) My fringe, Graham.
-Oh, Hesther!
42
00:03:58,250 --> 00:04:00,047
I'm sorry, tis most framing.
43
00:04:02,010 --> 00:04:03,523
I am a bad man.
44
00:04:04,410 --> 00:04:07,322
I am a bad, bad man.
45
00:04:07,410 --> 00:04:08,729
(BONES CRUNCHING)
46
00:04:08,810 --> 00:04:10,402
(WHIMPERING)
47
00:04:11,330 --> 00:04:14,766
Oh, come to bed, Graham.
48
00:04:16,170 --> 00:04:18,764
I, I think...
49
00:04:21,050 --> 00:04:24,247
I think I need just a moment longer.
50
00:04:24,850 --> 00:04:27,125
Alone. To pray.
51
00:04:29,850 --> 00:04:31,568
-Let us pray together.
-I...
52
00:04:33,010 --> 00:04:34,602
I should love that but...
53
00:04:35,930 --> 00:04:39,764
I would not have you tire your knees.
54
00:04:42,010 --> 00:04:44,080
-I shall pray for us both.
-Oh, Graham.
55
00:04:44,850 --> 00:04:46,920
See how you always think of me?
56
00:04:48,130 --> 00:04:49,483
Oh.
57
00:04:55,770 --> 00:04:57,044
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
58
00:04:57,130 --> 00:04:58,882
Ah! Dorothy.
59
00:04:58,970 --> 00:05:01,165
-Your bubbly milk, sir.
-Thank you.
60
00:05:02,210 --> 00:05:06,169
Dorothy, be sure to instruct Geoff
on how to frothy my milk
61
00:05:06,250 --> 00:05:07,399
ere we part for Fiji.
62
00:05:07,490 --> 00:05:08,843
I can live without comforts,
63
00:05:08,930 --> 00:05:11,649
but... (CHUCKLES)
...bubbly milk is not one of them.
64
00:05:13,010 --> 00:05:15,285
I'm so glad I'm still of some use, sir.
65
00:05:37,570 --> 00:05:40,721
-I should love to plunge you.
-Oh, Graham.
66
00:05:41,050 --> 00:05:46,283
And stay inside you all day
like a dozing mouse.
67
00:05:46,370 --> 00:05:47,439
Oh!
68
00:05:52,810 --> 00:05:54,368
-Graham?
-Hesther!
69
00:05:56,370 --> 00:06:01,364
I have sought thee high and low.
I bring your luncheon. Snout muffins.
70
00:06:02,570 --> 00:06:05,164
-Thank you.
-Mistress Hesther, we were...
71
00:06:05,770 --> 00:06:07,681
(STAMMERING) I... I...
72
00:06:08,490 --> 00:06:10,003
I... I had a pain.
73
00:06:10,090 --> 00:06:11,842
Oh, I hope nothing serious, mistress.
74
00:06:12,290 --> 00:06:16,806
No, no, no, just a winter chill
on my uvula.
75
00:06:17,250 --> 00:06:22,324
Yes, it is rather angry back there.
76
00:06:23,450 --> 00:06:26,886
Your uvula has bulbed.
77
00:06:28,410 --> 00:06:32,198
-A large salve should ease the rosing.
-Thank you, Doctor.
78
00:06:34,130 --> 00:06:38,646
Well, I should continue on my rounds.
79
00:06:39,370 --> 00:06:43,329
-You do not want my muffins?
-No, no. I do, I do.
80
00:06:47,930 --> 00:06:51,889
Yes, I should leave also.
I have so much to prepare for Fiji.
81
00:06:53,010 --> 00:06:56,400
Hammocks and...and biscuits.
82
00:06:58,050 --> 00:07:00,405
And the suchlike. Excuse me.
83
00:07:05,050 --> 00:07:07,280
I shall be so very sorry to see her go.
84
00:07:10,930 --> 00:07:12,488
Such a goodly soul.
85
00:07:23,290 --> 00:07:25,201
(LOW GROANING)
86
00:07:29,770 --> 00:07:33,445
EDMUND: Now your turn.
So, take it in your hand, that's it.
87
00:07:34,090 --> 00:07:37,526
And take it, yeah. And hard... Grip it.
Grip it hard.
88
00:07:37,610 --> 00:07:41,398
Hard, hard, harder, harder, harder,
89
00:07:41,490 --> 00:07:43,640
faster, faster, faster.
90
00:07:43,730 --> 00:07:47,439
That's it! That's it! That's it!
Oh, now.
91
00:07:48,290 --> 00:07:50,440
That's what I call bubbly milk.
92
00:07:52,770 --> 00:07:53,759
(SLURPING)
93
00:08:15,250 --> 00:08:17,684
Tis only Old Ian, ma'am.
94
00:08:17,770 --> 00:08:20,603
Carrying a sack of salted pigs feet
for the sea voyage.
95
00:08:21,730 --> 00:08:25,564
Though, in another light,
one might take him for a...
96
00:08:26,650 --> 00:08:27,639
hunchback.
97
00:08:30,930 --> 00:08:33,364
Did I tell thee of the hunchback
I met at the freak show, ma'am?
98
00:08:34,050 --> 00:08:38,601
A Master Waffen, was it? Or Whuffen.
A Master Whuffen?
99
00:08:40,690 --> 00:08:43,682
Uh, I know not.
100
00:08:45,690 --> 00:08:47,043
(DOOR CLOSING)
101
00:08:53,370 --> 00:08:55,247
(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)
102
00:09:03,330 --> 00:09:08,165
Helene, Helene, Helene.
My very heartbeat thumps Helene.
103
00:09:09,050 --> 00:09:11,359
I must just tell you,
my real name is Elisabeth.
104
00:09:11,450 --> 00:09:16,888
I care not if thy name were... Pew.
105
00:09:17,730 --> 00:09:18,924
Oh!
106
00:09:20,570 --> 00:09:21,764
Graham?
107
00:09:22,490 --> 00:09:24,048
Can we run away?
108
00:09:24,490 --> 00:09:25,764
I've packed a small bag.
109
00:09:27,770 --> 00:09:30,648
-Helene! You are sure?
-Yes!
110
00:09:30,930 --> 00:09:34,718
Please, tonight.
Though God may strike us down.
111
00:09:36,290 --> 00:09:37,359
I care not.
112
00:09:38,010 --> 00:09:40,001
For my heart would break, Angel,
113
00:09:40,090 --> 00:09:44,368
if I let you be dragged away
to the land of night-faced savages.
114
00:09:46,410 --> 00:09:47,445
But what of Edmund?
115
00:09:48,970 --> 00:09:50,642
-And Hesther?
-Yes.
116
00:09:51,130 --> 00:09:54,759
Oh! God forgive me.
117
00:09:55,090 --> 00:09:56,489
Nay, nay.
118
00:09:56,570 --> 00:10:00,927
I merely thought for a moment
of my poor, mangled wife.
119
00:10:03,130 --> 00:10:06,725
But no, she has robbed me
of enough years.
120
00:10:07,450 --> 00:10:10,442
Forget Hesther. And Edmund be blowed.
121
00:10:10,530 --> 00:10:11,849
Oh, Graham.
122
00:10:13,250 --> 00:10:15,400
We have but one life, Helene,
123
00:10:16,170 --> 00:10:20,527
and we must grab its horns
and ride him hard.
124
00:10:20,610 --> 00:10:21,679
(HELENE MOANING)
125
00:10:23,570 --> 00:10:26,130
-When will you come for me?
-Tonight.
126
00:10:26,690 --> 00:10:31,081
I shall pack a small bag
and return for thee at 8:00.
127
00:10:36,210 --> 00:10:37,768
I love thee.
128
00:10:55,610 --> 00:10:57,362
(HESTHER GROANING)
129
00:11:02,850 --> 00:11:06,525
Oh, Hesther! Oh!
130
00:11:11,210 --> 00:11:12,609
(GRUNTING)
131
00:11:16,250 --> 00:11:19,083
I thank you, my dearest friend.
132
00:11:19,490 --> 00:11:22,721
-I fear I grow weaker by the day.
-Nonsense, sister.
133
00:11:23,330 --> 00:11:26,720
-You are strong, stronger than I.
-Alas, no.
134
00:11:27,770 --> 00:11:30,045
In truth... But no.
135
00:11:30,930 --> 00:11:34,639
I cannot burden you. My soulmate...
136
00:11:35,170 --> 00:11:36,603
No, no, no. You must.
137
00:11:36,690 --> 00:11:40,478
God has not only seen fit to mangle
my body and render me wooden,
138
00:11:41,530 --> 00:11:42,883
but now I am to end my days
139
00:11:42,970 --> 00:11:46,724
with the most deadly
organ-palping disease.
140
00:11:48,090 --> 00:11:49,682
What mean you?
141
00:11:50,530 --> 00:11:54,569
I am dying, Helene. Dying as we speak.
142
00:11:55,570 --> 00:11:58,004
No! Oh!
143
00:11:58,970 --> 00:12:02,679
My lungs! Like mousse!
144
00:12:05,330 --> 00:12:09,721
My only comfort is that
my darling Graham will be by my side,
145
00:12:10,890 --> 00:12:12,801
loving me to the last.
146
00:12:13,930 --> 00:12:15,329
Oh, Hesther.
147
00:12:15,690 --> 00:12:19,763
Oh, tis nothing.
But please, do not tell Graham.
148
00:12:20,730 --> 00:12:23,483
It would kill him to know
how I suffer each closing moment
149
00:12:23,570 --> 00:12:26,243
of my most dark and blighted life.
150
00:12:28,290 --> 00:12:30,679
I will not. I promise.
151
00:12:32,650 --> 00:12:36,404
But how long do you think you have?
152
00:12:37,890 --> 00:12:39,289
Days, perhaps.
153
00:12:41,170 --> 00:12:44,321
Or possibly...longer.
154
00:12:46,450 --> 00:12:47,803
(THUNDER RUMBLING)
155
00:12:48,090 --> 00:12:49,569
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
156
00:13:01,530 --> 00:13:03,680
I come for my wife.
157
00:13:23,810 --> 00:13:24,925
I have my small bag.
158
00:13:26,290 --> 00:13:27,723
I know.
159
00:13:39,450 --> 00:13:41,361
Have you doughied of late?
160
00:13:42,650 --> 00:13:45,722
-Me likes this plumping frame.
-Graham,
161
00:13:46,650 --> 00:13:49,244
-I must speak with thee.
-And I with thee.
162
00:13:49,690 --> 00:13:51,920
Oh, tis paradise
163
00:13:52,010 --> 00:13:55,605
to roam thy mallowed thighs
with my fleshy pen.
164
00:13:55,690 --> 00:13:56,725
Graham, please...
165
00:13:56,810 --> 00:14:01,042
And thence wet it
deep inside your woollen ink pot.
166
00:14:01,130 --> 00:14:04,918
Graham. We cannot be together.
167
00:14:06,970 --> 00:14:08,244
You jest.
168
00:14:09,490 --> 00:14:10,809
We are bound for a new life together.
169
00:14:12,450 --> 00:14:13,849
It is impossible.
170
00:14:16,250 --> 00:14:19,162
But...we love each other!
171
00:14:19,250 --> 00:14:22,367
Graham, it is ended.
172
00:14:28,450 --> 00:14:29,485
(THUNDER RUMBLING)
173
00:14:31,570 --> 00:14:33,686
-You will not take my kisses?
-No.
174
00:14:35,890 --> 00:14:39,405
-Nor ride again my weeping sword?
-No.
175
00:14:41,330 --> 00:14:42,558
You do not love me?
176
00:14:48,810 --> 00:14:49,799
(LAUGHS)
177
00:14:53,490 --> 00:14:55,208
I do not believe it.
178
00:14:56,690 --> 00:14:59,841
Say it. Say you do not love me.
179
00:15:00,690 --> 00:15:03,762
Hmm? What's that? I cannot hear you.
180
00:15:04,810 --> 00:15:07,961
I'm sorry? I cannot hear you!
181
00:15:08,050 --> 00:15:09,927
(SHOUTING) I do not love you!
182
00:15:50,290 --> 00:15:51,484
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
183
00:15:56,730 --> 00:15:57,719
(COUGHS)
184
00:16:01,770 --> 00:16:02,998
(SNIFFING)
185
00:16:06,490 --> 00:16:07,889
(GRUNTS)
186
00:16:08,130 --> 00:16:10,086
-Kidney brown!
-EDMUND: Oh!
187
00:16:10,170 --> 00:16:12,320
-(CLAPPING)
-You're very good.
188
00:16:12,450 --> 00:16:14,168
DOROTHY: You've got wonderful nostrils.
189
00:16:14,250 --> 00:16:16,366
EDMUND: That's very good.
190
00:16:17,730 --> 00:16:20,961
DOROTHY: Ah!
Mistress Helene has returned!
191
00:16:24,330 --> 00:16:27,208
Oh! I trust you will join us
in our suppering?
192
00:16:27,290 --> 00:16:29,008
Dorothy has brought a special guest.
193
00:16:29,970 --> 00:16:32,962
You may remember Master Whiffin, ma'am?
194
00:16:33,890 --> 00:16:35,005
From the freak show?
195
00:16:41,890 --> 00:16:47,442
Forgive me,
I am most unwell. I must to bed.
196
00:16:47,770 --> 00:16:50,603
No, no, Helene.
I ask that you join our simple repast.
197
00:16:50,810 --> 00:16:53,244
john requested pork saddles
and there are still six...
198
00:16:53,330 --> 00:16:55,321
-Eight.
-Eight more saddles afloat...
199
00:16:55,490 --> 00:16:57,640
But I must to bed! Forgive me!
200
00:16:57,730 --> 00:17:00,881
Mistress! We have a blind
and disabled man at our table.
201
00:17:01,250 --> 00:17:03,684
I'm sure john would rather lollop
in bed all day
202
00:17:03,770 --> 00:17:06,000
but he lives on with courage.
203
00:17:06,570 --> 00:17:08,925
-Blind?
-As a stone.
204
00:17:10,530 --> 00:17:15,399
Your voice,
it is curious familiar, ma'am.
205
00:17:15,850 --> 00:17:17,568
I do not think so.
206
00:17:17,650 --> 00:17:23,043
If... (CHUCKLES) If john find it
familiar, then let it be so!
207
00:17:23,170 --> 00:17:25,638
He's had a difficult life.
Tell your tale, john.
208
00:17:25,730 --> 00:17:29,484
My wife did birth us a runt,
209
00:17:29,890 --> 00:17:34,088
then brained me and left me for dead.
(CHUCKLES)
210
00:17:34,770 --> 00:17:39,366
Dear, dear. I wonder how such a woman
could live with herself?
211
00:17:40,490 --> 00:17:43,960
Tis all devilry of course,
but Master Whiffin has special powers!
212
00:17:44,730 --> 00:17:46,641
He has the hearing of a dolphin,
213
00:17:46,730 --> 00:17:48,960
he smelt the colour of Dorothy's skirt
214
00:17:49,050 --> 00:17:51,723
and they say he has a lucky hump.
215
00:17:52,490 --> 00:17:57,883
Perhaps one rub of john's special lump
may bring a miracle to madam's womb.
216
00:17:58,490 --> 00:18:02,119
Bald David did touch it and
now has hair in all the right places.
217
00:18:05,130 --> 00:18:09,408
Yes. Helene. Touch the hump. Touch...
218
00:18:11,610 --> 00:18:12,725
Touch the hump.
219
00:18:15,370 --> 00:18:18,567
Why not touch the hump, ma'am?
220
00:18:18,650 --> 00:18:20,049
Touch it, ma'am.
221
00:18:20,130 --> 00:18:22,849
Come. Rub him well.
222
00:18:22,930 --> 00:18:24,409
Touch the hump.
223
00:18:24,490 --> 00:18:26,208
DOROTHY: Touch it.
EDMUND: Touch the hump.
224
00:18:26,450 --> 00:18:29,647
-Yes, touch him.
-Touch him. Gently.
225
00:18:30,490 --> 00:18:32,162
-Rub him.
-EDMUND: Touch him.
226
00:18:32,290 --> 00:18:34,008
Touch him, ma'am. Touch the hump.
227
00:18:34,610 --> 00:18:35,645
(SCREAMS)
228
00:19:00,970 --> 00:19:02,528
Oh, Helene...
229
00:19:05,170 --> 00:19:07,286
Helene.
230
00:19:53,970 --> 00:19:55,722
(PANTING)
231
00:19:55,930 --> 00:19:57,966
(SCREAMING)
232
00:20:01,290 --> 00:20:02,848
(SCREAM ECHOING)
233
00:20:13,570 --> 00:20:15,322
(WHIMPERING)
234
00:20:16,970 --> 00:20:18,198
(GASPS)
235
00:20:26,490 --> 00:20:28,321
(WHIMPERING)
236
00:20:35,450 --> 00:20:40,285
jOHN: I smell thee, Elisabeth Whiffin.
237
00:20:40,930 --> 00:20:43,922
No... I am not she.
238
00:20:44,010 --> 00:20:49,528
jOHN: Oh, 'cause you're a lady now,
are you?
239
00:20:55,090 --> 00:20:57,923
-(GASPING)
-You love him, do you?
240
00:20:58,490 --> 00:21:01,050
The good, pale master of Hunderby?
241
00:21:02,010 --> 00:21:03,523
He saved me.
242
00:21:04,690 --> 00:21:09,366
You are my wife
and you left me for dead.
243
00:21:09,450 --> 00:21:10,439
(SOBBING)
244
00:21:10,610 --> 00:21:15,047
-And I have come to take thee home.
-No, I am not your wife, john!
245
00:21:16,050 --> 00:21:19,679
I was your slave and you did force
yourself upon me time after time!
246
00:21:20,210 --> 00:21:22,599
Sorry! I'm...
247
00:21:27,010 --> 00:21:30,525
Oh, forgive me.
(SOBBING) Forgive me, please.
248
00:21:35,330 --> 00:21:36,843
(SNIFFING)
249
00:21:37,330 --> 00:21:41,164
-Oh! Oh, I hear him.
-Who?
250
00:21:42,650 --> 00:21:46,279
The little drummer boy. Drumming...
251
00:21:46,850 --> 00:21:49,967
His tiny heart, bouncing in your belly.
252
00:21:53,810 --> 00:21:57,200
You are with child, wife!
253
00:22:09,330 --> 00:22:14,563
-Forgive me, sir.
-Oh, Dorothy! I've made a smudge.
254
00:22:19,330 --> 00:22:22,879
I'm merely sketching a keepsake
for the good people of Hunderby
255
00:22:22,970 --> 00:22:24,801
before we set sail for Fiji.
256
00:22:25,530 --> 00:22:28,328
Well, I'm pleased to say, sir,
that they will have no need of it.
257
00:22:28,570 --> 00:22:30,367
How so?
258
00:22:30,450 --> 00:22:33,283
Why, you look as if you have taken
the cream from the cat's very teat!
259
00:22:33,370 --> 00:22:34,769
(EDMUND CHUCKLING)
260
00:22:35,450 --> 00:22:39,238
Hunderby is saved, sir.
Mistress Helene is with child!
261
00:22:40,210 --> 00:22:41,438
With child?
262
00:22:41,488 --> 00:22:46,038
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