Original subtitles

-Jerrod Carmichael: All right, you ready? -Joliet Carmichael: Yeah.

Jerrod: On your mark...

-I'm gonna win. -Joliet: No, you're not.

-Jerrod: On your mark... -Valencia Carmichael: Let's go.

Jerrod: Get set... Go!

(Jerrod laughing)

Jerrod: Oh, oh, oh! Wait! (laughing)

(laughing)

Valencia: Come on, buddy. Go, buddy, go, buddy, go!

Jerrod: I still win. Did I win?

I won? (laughs) You saw that, right?

Valencia: Who won, Lourdon?

Jerrod: I won.

Joliet: I was so close, he knows.

-Jerrod: Yeah. -Valencia: Yeah, you was...

(piano playing slow, bright jazz melody)

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

Um, what have you been up to?

Wait. You got out of school early today?

-Joliet: Yeah. -Yeah?

Mm-hmm.

'Cause, wait. Well, you like school, though.

-Joliet: Yes. -(laughs)

-Like, you love it, though. -Yeah, I love it since I was, like,

first going to kindergarten, so, like... you know.

-I-I love school. -But, like, why?

I mean, I think it's just joy of, like--

Some people don't like waking up early. I love routine.

Like my mom's always had me on a routine,

so like, I think it just comes natural to me, like...

I love to go to school and like have friends.

-And have school to do, and-- -Jerrod: You like the social aspect of it?

Yeah. I-I-I like that, too, yeah.

(rap music playing in background)

Who do you-- Do you look up

-to anyone? Who do you look up to? -No.

Um, well, I...

I see people as role models,

but I mean, well, if I had to put someone to look up to,

-it would probably be my mom. So, yeah. -Mm.

-She's a really strong person to me, definitely. -She's cool.

-Yeah. -Why do you look up to your mom?

Oh, because there's so many things about my mom

that I look to-- look up to her about.

Um, I think that, um, her having...

um, just the family that she's created.

I feel like I've been raised well.

All my other siblings have been raised well.

Um, I just think that...

when she tells me more about herself,

and how she felt like she wasn't smart at first,

but now she's like the best teacher I know.

Um, I just think that like everything she tells me,

is like a life lesson that I should learn.

And it just makes me feel--

She makes me feel happy, and just looking at her...

being a strong black woman with five children.

Do you feel accepted by everyone?

Do you feel accepted by white people?

Do you feel accepted by other races?

Um, well, let's see. Uh...

Most of my friends are black or mixed,

and I hang out with more black people, I feel like.

-Why? -I feel like I just...

I feel like their personality--

I go to a really artsy school, but I feel like their personality

just really makes me feel... welcome.

You know, like sometimes with white people,

I don't always-- I-I feel accepted, but it's almost like...

they're trying really hard to accept me.

I feel like sometimes with black people... they just accept me.

Do you ever see somebody on TV and identify, like--

go like, "Oh. They kind of represent me."

Like, do you feel like represented?

-Like in what they wear or what they do? -You see, like, uh...

Just who they are. Like do you ever see someone like in...

not just on television but like in politics

or in the world, or whatever that like--

I asked about role models, but I guess

it's somewhat different when I'm asking, do you identify,

or do you see yourself in someone,

like on television, ever.

-No. -Really?

-Uh-uh. -Oh, I know what I meant to ask you, though.

What's the secret of being happy?

Um...

Probably believing in yourself, and...

always having God with you.

And just being confident in what you have.

That's-- that's mainly it. Yeah.

You just really have to be with yourself

and not with the world, you know?

You have to know what you want, not what everyone else wants.

Who the fuck are you?

-Joliet Shania Carmichael. -(laughing)

Jerrod: Yeah, do-- Oh, that's tight.

Joliet: Can you do it?

-Jerrod: Oh! -(laughing)

-Jerrod: For real this time. Stand on that side... -Okay.

...so you can see it.

-I want you to like get a good view of it. -Yeah.

All right.

-(yells) Oh! It was almost there! -Oh!

-I was almost there. -You need to land on your feet.

Joliet: Stand up. Do you need help?

(Jerrod laughs)

Child: Whoa! Whoa!

(children giggling)

♪ ♪

-You sure you don't want any? -(laughs) No. I do not. No.

You don't like me drinking rosé out of your children's "Dream Big" cup?

No, it's awful, actually. I don't like it.

-A little rosé and... -You could have just picked a nice plastic cup.

No, 'cause I like Snoopy.

-You still been on your, uh-- -I would have drawn Snoopy on there for you.

You still been on your, uh-- pro-black, pro-woman shit?

Or is-- Are you off that this week?

I'm not sure if that's what I would call it.

You've been going hard on the whole thing.

We've had, uh, all these arguments on representation.

That's because you like to confront me with things

that you know I feel strongly about.

-No, no, I think I like to-- -Yes, you do.

What-- what did I say that pissed you off last time?

It's, um... it's, you know, every day that you call.

But I'm just saying, 'cause you been...

Where we don't overlap is you always are saying, support, no matter what.

No, I just believe in solidarity.

I don't believe in support no matter-- no, no, no.

I just feel like black women as a whole get enough criticism,

so, I don't need you to add to it.

Okay. Fair enough. But in--

in art and like entertainment and stuff,

we're not supposed to just pretend that like everything's good.

-Right? Like, are we-- -Now that's the difference. I don't pretend. I am--

I'm very authentic in what I believe, and I'm true to what I believe.

It just doesn't always fit with your beliefs.

Jerrod: You want to try?

(Jerrod laughs)

You've gotta blow harder, but not too hard.

Do you teach your children, uh, a certain awareness about race?

Yeah, I'm extremely honest with them,

because I feel like I don't have a choice.

What do you say to them?

I make sure that my son knows that...

there are certain instances and certain circumstances that you may be in

that will require you to think quick on your feet.

And, um, not to live in fear, but to know that there are certain situations

that you may be placed in,

that people are going to judge you because you are black.

Because children white or black don't know it's a difference

until someone makes them aware.

-Jerrod: Mm-hmm. -Valencia: And so at that point, it is my responsibility

Because to me, this is more than just-- this is my child's life.

So at that point it is-- it is a difference between, like,

oh, I just need to shed light on this because it's a noose

or because it's a hashtag.

This is my son's life. This is my daughter's life.

So I have to have conversations with her about... about rape,

about being in certain circumstances,

about how she dresses, how she walks,

how her hair is, how people may talk to her.

I... I have to have those conversations.

I don't have the luxury to just wait until something happens.

Jerrod: So, okay. It's the... black women not feeling included.

What do we do to help? What do I do?

Like what's the... what's the answer?

'Cause it seems like a feeling, and it's hard to help a feeling.

You know what I mean, like, it seems like a...

You know, it's a valid feeling,

but it's hard to know how to contribute

to just feelings.

One thing-- And it's actions.

But one thing I do appreciate and I value

is this conversation.

Because many times the conversation is just left on deaf ears

and nobody does anything about it.

But I feel like this is more than social move--

social media is more than a movement.

This is actually real life

in the fact that you as a black male

wants to listen to black women.

That's the start.

I mean, I gotta listen. Y'all are a goddamn lot.

-You right. You do have to listen. -(laughing)

-We don't give you a choice. -It ain't like I have a choice.

-We aren't giving you a choice. -(both laughing)

You're around the numbers, you have four nieces.

Yeah, I'm surrounded by like-- What am I gonna do, not listen?

-You don't have a choice. -That's why-- That's why I fuck with y'all.

You got to. Somebody got to.

-Everybody's scared. -That's why-- That's why we fuck with you.

-Okay. -Ha! How about that? (laughing)

♪ ♪

-Jerrod: This is a real question. -Tiffany Gladney: Okay.

-Real question. -Okay.

-All right. I bring home a white girl. -Okay.

What's-- What was that?

-I had to sneeze. -Is that what that was?

Mm-hmm.

-Jerrod: You want me to finish the question? -Yes.

-If bring home a white girl, introduce her to you first... -Uh-huh.

-...since you gotta sneeze, what's your... -(laughter)

...what's your reaction to me after we leave?

-Mm. That's my re-- -Like what do you text me?

-No, I'm not gonna text you. -What do you mean, you're not gonna text me?

Not gonna text you. I'm gonna have to process it.

-(Jessica Muouzon laughs) -Jerrod: What's there to process?

I just really want you to celebrate and embrace black love.

Does that mean that I don't if I did marry a--

-or dated or whatever? -But if you did embrace black love,

wouldn't you have a black partner?

-Yeah, I mean, I also-- -Like how can you embrace black love

and have a non-black partner?

-Didn't we have this debate? -Avery McLemore: We did.

Tiffany: And Jess was...

-I'm the one who's on the outside of this. -Tiffany: Yeah.

-Jerrod: You can-- you can embrace without being involved. -Can you?

-Jessica: Yes. -Jerrod: Yeah. Yeah, of course. I embrace--

I think all the damned whales in the ocean

should be out there livin' free lives.

That don't mean I'm jumpin' my black ass out there with 'em.

(all laughing)

Jerrod: Wait, but y'all all saw the R. Kelly doc?

-Yes. Yes. We did see it. -Aw, hell.

-And... -Wait. You had a-- what?

I have a, um, funny but sad story and y'all will relate to me on this.

Bitch, don't be puttin' me in that category.

-I'm not trying to agree with that until I hear the story. -No, no, no.

-It has nothing to do with agreeing with R. Kelly. -I'm with you, Avery.

-I'm with you, Avery. -It could be insane.

You know I don't agree with R. Kelly. Don't--

Jessica: I need to know what y'all position--

-Don't put me on there like that. -(laughing)

R. Kelly makes my blood boil like he makes

the soul of me want to die, but no.

You know how hard it is to get your hair done.

-Tiffany: Yes. -Okay.

Went to get my hair done. Isn't it cute?

-Tiffany: Yes. -Jessica: Mm-hmm. I like the jet black.

-She did it perfectly. -Tiffany: Okay.

Just sitting there, minding my business, eating my food, getting my hair done.

"Yeah, girl, 'cause you know, all I do is listen to R. Kelly.

"R. Kelly, Anita Baker, girl. Yada-yada-yada-ya."

Proceeds, proceeds, proceeds, and I'm just like... (sighs)

And did you feel like you needed to leave?

-No. She had curlers on my neck, so... -(all laughing)

-Jessica: Priorities! -Avery: No. I sat there and ate my food.

Jerrod: So you'll boycott R. Kelly, but you won't boycott

the women who won't boycott R. Kelly.

No, but I feel like I will, though. I don't know if I'm gonna go back.

If it comes on, "Step in the Name of Love" comes on, you at your aunt's house,

-you're not steppin'? -Tiffany: I'm a fighter.

-You gonna fight it? -Tiffany: I'm a fighter.

-I don't have to fight it. -And then I might just tap my toe under the table.

-I mean, here's the thing. -Jessica: I'm gonna do it.

-Jerrod: You gonna step? -Jessica: I'm gonna do it. I still love "Sex in the Kitchen."

-Like, you can't tell me, it's like... -(all laughing)

-Jerrod: There was a-- -"On your tippy-toes"? (laughing)

Jerrod: Well, it's funny 'cause his-- his, uh, his music,

like, sales went up, after the--

-Avery: I think that was from curiosity-- -But no, no, no. It's--

It's from-- 'Cause it happened to me. I was watching--

I'm watching the doc and all of a sudden you just get reminded

through these videos of like-- "Oh, I don't have 'Ignition Remix.'

"Let me add it before they take it away."

-No, I think it was-- Right. Avery: I think people wanted to hear it in the music.

Jerrod: Bria, would you still listen to R. Kelly?

-Bria Carter: Yes. -(Jessica, Avery laughing)

-Bria: To a certain extent. -Avery: Come on, Bria.

-Bria: I would not, I would not--- -Wait. Come here.

I wouldn't just play R. Kelly just openly all the time.

Just because I feel like it might...

-It might-- it might-- -Damage us.

-Yeah, just as a whole. -Jerrod: So you wouldn't play to not offend someone else?

Bria: Um, potentially, yeah. Maybe not...

It wouldn't be my first pick if I'm the D.J.

-Jerrod: It's all gone. -Jessica: Yeah. I mean, if I need to,

I can go get an extra bottle of wine from my white mama across the street.

We can-- we can switch. I'll switch to--

I'll switch to the number one prosecco in Italy.

(all laughing)

Jerrod: I didn't know it was the--

I didn't know it was the number one prosecco in Italy.

Jessica: But that's what it had on there.

The standard of even how you present yourself in the room,

-how you dress, matters. -Jerrod: Mm-hmm.

Like a white, blond lobbyist can walk in with a short skirt on,

-as tight as hell, -Jerrod: Yeah.

She come twiddling her little ass through the, uh, committee room,

-and, "Hi, how are you? Hi. Yes. Nice to--" -Jerrod: Yeah.

Let my black ass walk up in there with a skirt on that's too tight...

Avery: You get all the-- You're the Jezebel.

-Jerrod: Here's the-- -Tiffany: I am the Jezebel of the general...

-(laughing) -You sucked dick to get to where you at.

-Jessica: Right! -But here's the question, though.

Tiffany: It's like these unspoken standards.

Like would you say, and this is-- I'm gonna get killed for this--

-You want a cup for that? -Yeah. Your dad don't care if I drink his Crown Royal?

No, I got that from my white mama.

Would you argue, though, that black women's body type

-just naturally draws more attention in that same skirt. -Jessica: Sometimes.

-Jessica: Sometimes. -That same skirt on a black girl,

on, like a different body type is just like, oh, shit.

It does, but it does for all the wrong reasons,

because historically, black bodies have been over-sexualized.

I just dealt with this issue with a dance team of mine.

The girls on the volleyball squad at my school can wear spandex,

and they're predominantly white girls, can wear spandex,

and just be out there having the best time of their life.

My black girls wear shorts, and their whole dance team has been shut down.

-They shut down the team? -The whole team, because it was provocative and sexual.

What is it about black bodies that are ins-- innately sexual?

-Like where does that come from? It comes from fucking slavery. -Yeah. Yeah.

From the idea that black women are either going to be a mammy,

or they're going to be the Sapphire character.

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

Make a cake. You wanna say cake? Let's make a cake.

♪ ♪

All right. Make us a cake?

Yeah.

Can you help me? Can you help me? Yes.

(phone ringing)

(phone ringing)

-Who was that? -I didn't look at the phone.

-(phone ringing) -No. Do you care?

-(both laughing) -You don't answer the phone sometimes.

-I don't. Yeah. -Just, you don't...

No, I don't care. If I choose to talk,

-I will. -Voicemail: Please leave a message...

If they leave me a message and I want to call 'em back, I will.

Jerrod: Did you-- Do you think that you've like...

come to try and accept that you're...

like, pretty?

Yeah... yeah. Now, as an adult. Yeah.

What, you-- what-- Being dark-skinned, you-- Did you-- ?

Dark-skinned played a, uh, big part in it. Yeah.

Why not? Why didn't you like being dark-skinned?

Because that wasn't "the look."

-Jerrod: (laughs) Yeah. -Yeah.

It wasn't the look. It wasn't the thing...

that men were looking for-- most men were looking for.

-Like a dark-skinned girl. -Yeah. Pretty much, no.

Did you ever try and like cover your skin up or change your skin?

No. I did use like bleaching cream one time.

-Really? -Yeah, I bought some and they said it's--

Jerrod: When? When did you do this?

Oh, gosh, teenager. You know how when you're a teenager, you try stuff.

Well, how do you say you feel about yourself now?

Cynthia Carmichael: I'm confident, I think, in myself now.

So, I accept who I am. I am who I am and...

-I'm... I'm pleased now. Yeah. -Yeah.

I mean, you've had like a crazy couple years.

-Cynthia: Yeah. Yeah. -(Jerrod laughs) Yeah.

-Yeah. -Jerrod: You seem really happy.

Oh, yeah. I choose to be.

-Jerrod: You-- you-- -I think it's a choice.

You can choose to be miserable and you can choose to be happy,

and nobody's gonna care which way you choose,

'cause they're not living your life, so it's up to you to do it.

And so I decided, you know what, I want to be happy.

Jerrod: Well, I just wanted to talk to you about a--

'cause we... we've talked before, but, uh...

You know, there's still like a lot of thoughts and questions and stuff

that, uh, I always wanted to ask you about.

Like Dad, not only cheating, but like having...

multiple kids, you know,

multiple children, outside of the relationship.

Do you ever think about leaving?

I did at first. Oh, for sure. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Now, I'm not-- No. I'm good.

No moments of resentment? No moments of anger?

No, I chose not, 'cause I know resentment

would build in, so that's why, like I said, it was a gradual thing.

And I'm not gonna sit here and say...

the hurt and anger didn't try to build, because I'm human.

But... maybe I suppressed some of it, but then I...

got enough talk in and asked enough questions that...

I don't know. Like I said, I'm pretty much content.

And it's on him to prove to me that I can trust him again, so it's not on me.

-Jerrod: Has he been proving it? -For the most part.

-Do you question him now? -Yeah.

Really, I don't really have to question, 'cause he's so on it now...

opens up and tell me-- well, as far as I know-- everything.

-It's hard for me to let go and understand. -Okay.

You know what I mean? Like just go, like, oh, I-- 'cause I know-- I mean...

You're my mother. I know you very well and I know that you

actually don't stay up at night thinking about it.

-Cynthia: No. Yeah. -(laughs) You know.

What brings you that-- How do you have the ability to do that?

Cynthia: One name: Jesus.

-(Jerrod laughs) -Totally serious.

-Jerrod: The... The complete faith that... -Complete faith.

That's really beautiful. I was always, uh...

You know, I mean, I worry...

and continue to just worry for you, you know.

Like, and just want to make sure you're okay, like, you know...

And you have all the options in the world,

like, you can go anywhere. You know what I mean? Like...

So I just want to make sure you're like...

you feel free, like free from it.

Cynthia: I do. I do. Mm-hmm.

-Yeah. -Cynthia: Yeah. Oh, yeah.

What if you caught him-- What if you caught him cheating again?

Cynthia: Then it would be on me to...

keep putting up with that, so, chances are--

and you never say what you're gonna do 'cause you don't know--

but chances are I would not stay a second time.

-Jerrod: Yeah. -No.

-Especially at this age, no. -Yeah.

'Cause... life's too short for that, to be unhappy.

-Jerrod: You'd get out there? -Oh. Yeah.

-You'd find you a new nigga? -No. I wouldn't... I wouldn't be looking.

-I would enjoy life. -But you would find you a new nigga.

-No. He would have to find me. -Ma. Ma...

-He would have to find me. (laughs) -Ma.

Look at you. You-- You're gonna find a new nigga.

-(Cynthia laughs) -Like, I know all types of-- listen.

You ever wanna just do that? You ever just wanna go...

I mean, I love you, and pardon the language,

but you didn't ever just wanna go fuck some random nigga...

-Cynthia: Uh-uh. -...and like,

"Fuck you, nigga.

"You cheated on me, you had all these goddamned kids.

Fuck you, I'm gonna go fuck this strange nigga." Like...

Like some, you know...

Stella Got Her Groove Back type shit,

'cause I could send you down to Jamaica.

We could do it. I'd be cool with it.

-Cynthia: Well, I'm sure you would. (laughs) -You know I'd be cool with it.

I mean, I love Dad, but I'm just saying, if you just wanted to get out there...

-(Cynthia laughs) -You can, I mean, that's the thing, I mean--

Cynthia: No, I know I have options. I do know that. But no. No.

This temple belongs to the Lord,

and I do not want to abuse it it any way.

Not even for that reason. No. It's not worth it.

Jerrod: All right, I mean, it's your temple. I respect your temple.

I'm just saying, you know, life is short.

You gotta get out there. There's a whole world out there.

-Yeah. It is. -You ever done cocaine?

-No. -Me, either. Me, either.

-Okay. All right. -All right. But I'm just saying it's out there.

-I know it's out there. -You've got that option.

There's a lot out there and I have an option. I have a choice.

I do know these things.

-Jerrod: You ever been attracted to a woman? -No.

-Never? -No.

I mean, I don't mean that they're ugly, but no, I don't-- no.

-I-- I prefer men. -I-- I hooked up with dudes before.

Okay. Well, that's your option.

(laughs) That's not mine.

-Okay. -Yeah.

No. I like... I like men.

You ever like, uh... Some dude, you ever like...

see some dude walking down the street and be like...

Oh, yeah, I'd like... I'd smash.

No. I've found them attractive, but no, not--

Jerrod: Well, isn't that just saying, "I'd smash"?

No, 'cause, uh, I don't think of it that way. No.

-So, no. I can't say that. No. -You don't?

-No. -No.

I thought it was kind of the same thing.

-Maybe for some people, but... -Yeah.

...for me, no. I just say, "Oh, that's a nice-looking--"

Your imagination doesn't go to anything?

-No. -You're so sweet. Oh, man.

-Who are you? -(laughing)

How are we the same-- ? How are we the same?

-I do wonder that. I do wonder that. No. -What, like...

-What? -It's choices. I just told you the keyword is choices.

Life is full of choices.

I choose to be happy.

-I love you. -I love you, too. (laughs softly)

-(kisses) -(Cynthia laughs softly)

♪ ♪

-(kisses) -(Cynthia chuckling)

(Jerrod laughs)

♪ ♪

♪ Yule tide carol... ♪

(children shouting playfully)

(baby babbling)

♪ You don't love me. I think I love you ♪

Uh-oh, uh-oh, fuck it up, sis! Fuck it up!

(giggling)

You laugh just like your grandfather.

Girls: Cheese!

Jerrod: You know, because I'm gonna go meet, uh... I'm gonna go meet my sister

probably for the first time. You think that's a good idea?

It only makes me cringe because I'm only used to you calling me your sister.

So now it's, I have to deal with the reality

that you actually, you have a biological sister.

Jerrod: A goddamn gang of the muthafuckas!

-(laughing) -Jerrod: You think you the only one?

-Yes! -This nigga reproduced like a goddamned elk!

-Oh, did you say an elk? -Yeah.

-(both laughing) -There's a whole fucking herd of...

muthafuckas with these eyebrows.

-(laughing) -Valencia: Yeah, and those eye--

(knocking)

♪ ♪

-My daddy over here? I'm fucking with you. -Kenya Frasier: No.

-Hey! -(both laughing)

-Kenya: No, he's not here. -I'm fucking with you.

-Jerrod: How are you? -I'm good. How are you doing? Welcome. Welcome.

Jerrod: I'm good, I'm good. Oh, your house is lovely.

-Well, thank you. I appreciate it. -This is great.

-Nice to meet you. -Nice to meet you, finally.

-Oh, look at these eyebrows. That's us. -Yep. We've got that in common.

You look just like Dad, too, I promise you.

Jerrod: Oh, good to see you, love. Very nice to meet you.

-Nice to meet you, as well. -Of course.