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1
00:00:13,446 --> 00:00:15,081
Okay.
2
00:00:17,817 --> 00:00:21,588
I can't imagine spending
my life with anyone else.
3
00:00:22,922 --> 00:00:27,394
You are the most beautiful,
sweet, kind-hearted person
4
00:00:27,427 --> 00:00:31,598
I've ever met, and you make me
happier than I have ever been.
5
00:00:31,631 --> 00:00:34,734
If you give me the chance,
I would love to spend
6
00:00:34,768 --> 00:00:38,905
the rest of my life trying to
make you feel the same way.
7
00:00:38,938 --> 00:00:41,574
Will... you marry me?
8
00:00:43,943 --> 00:00:46,279
Oh, you're done?
9
00:00:46,312 --> 00:00:48,415
- Yep.
- No, it was good. It was good.
10
00:00:48,448 --> 00:00:50,250
- A little generic, but good.
- Generic?
11
00:00:50,283 --> 00:00:51,661
Come on, that was
some top-tier shit.
12
00:00:51,685 --> 00:00:53,253
It was shit, I'm
not arguing that.
13
00:00:53,286 --> 00:00:55,155
Okay, and I'm going
to beat you to death.
14
00:00:55,188 --> 00:00:56,666
Even your death threats
have gotten generic.
15
00:00:56,690 --> 00:00:58,625
I'm not done yet, I'm
gonna kill you, chop you up
16
00:00:58,658 --> 00:01:00,527
in little pieces and
throw you in a river.
17
00:01:00,560 --> 00:01:02,405
Well, if it were me, I
would grind up your guts,
18
00:01:02,429 --> 00:01:04,040
turn you into an aged
sausage, then feed you
19
00:01:04,064 --> 00:01:05,307
to people I don't like
at dinner parties.
20
00:01:05,331 --> 00:01:07,167
Two birds, one
stone, I like that.
21
00:01:07,200 --> 00:01:08,944
- Thank you.
- I would-I would bleed you out.
22
00:01:08,968 --> 00:01:10,503
And use your skin as a coat.
23
00:01:10,537 --> 00:01:11,938
Oh, that doesn't
sound very warm.
24
00:01:11,971 --> 00:01:14,207
- On a fall day with a cardigan?
- See, that's poetic.
25
00:01:14,240 --> 00:01:15,651
Why don't you use
that in your proposal?
26
00:01:15,675 --> 00:01:17,253
No, no, Taylor, I don't
think she'll go for that.
27
00:01:17,277 --> 00:01:18,754
Well, if she doesn't
respond favorably
28
00:01:18,778 --> 00:01:20,656
to the idea of you wearing
her skin on a fall day,
29
00:01:20,680 --> 00:01:22,158
then I don't think
she's the girl for you.
30
00:01:22,182 --> 00:01:23,492
She is, and you're
gonna meet her.
31
00:01:23,516 --> 00:01:24,660
- And you're gonna love her.
- Mm, yeah.
32
00:01:24,684 --> 00:01:26,195
I don't know about
that. You haven't had
33
00:01:26,219 --> 00:01:27,654
great taste in
women since college.
34
00:01:27,687 --> 00:01:29,656
Plus, if she's so great,
then why have you been
35
00:01:29,689 --> 00:01:31,667
hiding her from me for the last
two times I've been out here?
36
00:01:31,691 --> 00:01:33,159
I didn't want you
to scare her away.
37
00:01:35,228 --> 00:01:37,163
Oh, by the way, I know
you like to snoop around,
38
00:01:37,197 --> 00:01:39,432
I put all the good stuff
in the top sock drawer.
39
00:01:39,466 --> 00:01:41,301
Thank you. Are
you sure it's cool
40
00:01:41,334 --> 00:01:42,969
if I crash with you for so long?
41
00:01:43,003 --> 00:01:44,537
I can always get an Airbnb.
42
00:01:44,571 --> 00:01:45,982
Uh, I can't really
afford that, but...
43
00:01:46,006 --> 00:01:49,309
Stop. You're always welcome,
okay? Breakup or not.
44
00:01:49,342 --> 00:01:51,811
- Thank you. I appreciate it.
- Of course, dude.
45
00:01:53,279 --> 00:01:54,848
Now, get out of my
car. I have to go.
46
00:01:54,881 --> 00:01:56,649
- Okay.
- Oh, by the way.
47
00:01:56,683 --> 00:01:58,184
Do you mind showering
before dinner
48
00:01:58,218 --> 00:02:00,029
because you kinda smell
like an airplane toilet.
49
00:02:00,053 --> 00:02:01,797
Thank you for noticing. You
know, this car makes you
50
00:02:01,821 --> 00:02:03,332
look like a child molester,
in case you're wondering
51
00:02:03,356 --> 00:02:04,533
why the cops are
knocking at your door.
52
00:02:04,557 --> 00:02:06,359
- Okay.
- Awesome. Have a great day.
53
00:02:06,393 --> 00:02:09,863
- Thank you do much. You too.
- Yep, have a good day at work.
54
00:02:09,896 --> 00:02:13,767
- Thank you. Oh, your key.
- Oh, God, thanks.
55
00:02:13,800 --> 00:02:18,571
- Bye, honey! Bye, sweetheart!
- Okay, bye! Bye, honey!
56
00:02:18,605 --> 00:02:19,582
Half past the hour
57
00:02:19,606 --> 00:02:21,474
on this snowy Chicago morning.
58
00:02:21,508 --> 00:02:24,544
Here's some Aaron Espe
that'll weather the storm.
59
00:02:27,914 --> 00:02:31,918
♪ I leave all the windows open ♪
60
00:02:31,951 --> 00:02:34,087
♪ Let the light come through
61
00:02:37,557 --> 00:02:39,926
♪ Sunshine warm and golden
62
00:02:39,959 --> 00:02:43,763
♪ Morning making
all things new ♪
63
00:02:47,233 --> 00:02:52,104
♪ Home where my heart is
64
00:02:52,105 --> 00:02:56,743
♪ Home where my love lives
65
00:02:56,776 --> 00:03:01,815
♪ Home my beginning and end
66
00:03:01,848 --> 00:03:03,049
♪ Home
67
00:03:11,291 --> 00:03:13,593
♪ Look at all the colors
68
00:03:13,626 --> 00:03:17,364
♪ Wild wonderful and true
69
00:03:20,500 --> 00:03:23,336
♪ Your breath light
as a feather ♪
70
00:03:23,370 --> 00:03:26,840
♪ Like little
whispers in the room ♪
71
00:03:30,410 --> 00:03:35,281
♪ Home where my heart is
72
00:03:35,315 --> 00:03:39,786
♪ Home where my love lives
73
00:03:39,819 --> 00:03:44,958
♪ Home my beginning and end
74
00:03:44,991 --> 00:03:45,992
♪ Home
75
00:04:08,481 --> 00:04:13,520
♪ Home where my heart is
76
00:04:13,553 --> 00:04:18,324
♪ Home where my love lives
77
00:04:18,358 --> 00:04:20,827
♪ Home my beginning...
78
00:04:20,860 --> 00:04:23,430
Carl, what's up, dude?
79
00:04:23,463 --> 00:04:25,398
- Hey!
- Oh, hi!
80
00:04:27,133 --> 00:04:28,968
Funny seeing you here.
81
00:04:29,069 --> 00:04:32,405
Actually, that's perfect because
I came back up to give you this.
82
00:04:32,439 --> 00:04:33,907
You left it at my
place last night.
83
00:04:33,940 --> 00:04:36,142
- What would I do without you?
- Get fired, I think.
84
00:04:36,176 --> 00:04:37,844
- I can adapt.
- You're too old to adapt.
85
00:04:37,877 --> 00:04:40,313
- That's true.
- Yeah, okay. I am late.
86
00:04:40,347 --> 00:04:41,791
And my Stevens meeting
got moved uptown,
87
00:04:41,815 --> 00:04:43,359
so I won't have time to
get the dry cleaning.
88
00:04:43,383 --> 00:04:46,152
I got it. This elevator's
taking forever.
89
00:04:49,723 --> 00:04:51,524
- The button. Right.
- Yeah.
90
00:04:51,558 --> 00:04:53,518
- What would you do without me?
- See you tonight?
91
00:04:55,328 --> 00:04:58,298
- 7:30. Thank you. I love you.
- I love you.
92
00:05:01,468 --> 00:05:03,136
I don't think it went.
93
00:05:12,579 --> 00:05:14,114
Okay. I'm buying a pretzel.
94
00:05:14,147 --> 00:05:15,615
Hey, we're about to eat dinner.
95
00:05:15,648 --> 00:05:17,193
You keep saying that
and I'm still starving.
96
00:05:17,217 --> 00:05:18,494
I told you not to
smoke all of that.
97
00:05:18,518 --> 00:05:19,686
You also said this bitch was
98
00:05:19,719 --> 00:05:21,187
going to be here
twenty minutes ago.
99
00:05:21,221 --> 00:05:23,055
Hey, you need to chill.
Taylor has a thing about pot,
100
00:05:23,056 --> 00:05:24,800
and I want her to like
you, so please just...
101
00:05:24,824 --> 00:05:26,569
- Here she comes. Here she comes.
- Hi!
102
00:05:26,593 --> 00:05:29,062
I'm sorry, I'm sorry. My,
my cab driver hit a pigeon
103
00:05:29,095 --> 00:05:31,064
and he was inconsolable,
and I felt terrible
104
00:05:31,097 --> 00:05:32,641
leaving him and it
was this whole thing.
105
00:05:32,665 --> 00:05:33,967
Ah! Hey!
106
00:05:34,067 --> 00:05:36,102
Do you think that
pigeon's up for grabs?
107
00:05:36,136 --> 00:05:39,939
Uh, Taylor, Lexa. Lexa, Taylor.
108
00:05:39,973 --> 00:05:43,510
- You're Lexa?
- Yes. Right? Yeah.
109
00:05:43,543 --> 00:05:45,879
- Nice to meet you.
- Okay, let's eat.
110
00:05:45,912 --> 00:05:48,682
Uh, yeah, yeah, we know a great
Italian bistro a few blocks out.
111
00:05:48,715 --> 00:05:51,885
- What about this place?
- My place has great focaccia.
112
00:05:51,918 --> 00:05:53,687
This place has a buffet.
113
00:05:53,720 --> 00:05:55,422
Oh, it also has a,
a D health rating.
114
00:05:55,455 --> 00:05:57,757
I've never even seen
a D before.
115
00:05:57,791 --> 00:05:59,459
Don't.
116
00:05:59,492 --> 00:06:01,003
Well, did you know that
there's enough alcohol
117
00:06:01,027 --> 00:06:02,638
in one cocktail to kill
most food-borne illnesses?
118
00:06:02,662 --> 00:06:04,464
That doesn't sound like science.
119
00:06:04,497 --> 00:06:07,032
Come on. Hole In The
Walls have the best food.
120
00:06:07,033 --> 00:06:09,336
Back me up on this, Pistol Pete.
121
00:06:12,505 --> 00:06:14,941
- Okay, smell it.
- Yes, it's got nectar in it.
122
00:06:16,609 --> 00:06:18,778
Passion fruit and
nectar. Do you smell it?
123
00:06:18,812 --> 00:06:20,780
Yeah, but I also got
my lipstick on you.
124
00:06:20,814 --> 00:06:22,749
- You guys are cute.
- Oh, thank you.
125
00:06:22,782 --> 00:06:25,785
It's really sweet.
Uh, so what about you?
126
00:06:25,819 --> 00:06:28,254
Peter tells me that you were
dating someone back in New York.
127
00:06:28,288 --> 00:06:31,257
Luke. Yeah, I was. Past tense.
128
00:06:31,291 --> 00:06:32,492
- Oh!
- No, it's fine.
129
00:06:32,525 --> 00:06:33,669
I broke up with him actually.
130
00:06:33,693 --> 00:06:35,295
Um, he had these
really big teeth.
131
00:06:35,328 --> 00:06:37,063
It was like making
out with a Steinway.
132
00:06:37,097 --> 00:06:39,064
I used to be like that, I
used to end things with guys
133
00:06:39,065 --> 00:06:41,167
over the littlest things,
like they're going bald,
134
00:06:41,201 --> 00:06:43,870
or they like ironic mugs, or
they have two first names.
135
00:06:43,903 --> 00:06:46,673
And then she found me,
the perfect male specimen.
136
00:06:46,706 --> 00:06:49,743
No. I, um, realized I
didn't want to be alone.
137
00:06:49,776 --> 00:06:51,811
Ah, see, I just love the
idea of ending up alone.
138
00:06:51,845 --> 00:06:53,546
Wait. You're
saying you settled?
139
00:06:53,580 --> 00:06:54,824
No, bear, I didn't
mean it like that.
140
00:06:54,848 --> 00:06:56,416
Kinda sounded like
it, but it's okay,
141
00:06:56,449 --> 00:06:58,083
you're way out of my
league, it's all good.
142
00:06:58,084 --> 00:07:01,020
So, so what about now? A-are you
trying to get back out there?
143
00:07:01,021 --> 00:07:03,857
No, no, no, no, not quite.
Um, I'm just focusing on
144
00:07:03,890 --> 00:07:05,234
launching this app
I've been designing.
145
00:07:05,258 --> 00:07:06,659
Yeah. It's great. I can't
146
00:07:06,693 --> 00:07:08,304
believe no one's thought
about this, tell her.
147
00:07:08,328 --> 00:07:10,330
- No, it's not a big deal.
- Dude, come on.
148
00:07:10,363 --> 00:07:13,033
Okay, um, so, it's helps you
find the closest dive bar.
149
00:07:13,066 --> 00:07:14,877
So you know, like, when
you're out with your friends
150
00:07:14,901 --> 00:07:16,703
and you're like, "Oh,
we don't wanna go home,
151
00:07:16,736 --> 00:07:18,905
but where do we go?" That's
where my app comes in.
152
00:07:18,938 --> 00:07:21,041
Oh, isn't that a
feature on Google Maps?
153
00:07:21,074 --> 00:07:23,910
Yeah, but mine has, um,
pictures and reviews.
154
00:07:23,943 --> 00:07:25,845
Oh, Yelp?
155
00:07:25,879 --> 00:07:29,048
It-it might not work, but, um...
156
00:07:29,049 --> 00:07:31,685
Honestly, I'm just trying to
finish something for once.
157
00:07:31,718 --> 00:07:32,862
I have this really
bad habit of starting
158
00:07:32,886 --> 00:07:34,287
things and then dropping them.
159
00:07:34,320 --> 00:07:36,056
Ugh! I'm like that
with knitting.
160
00:07:36,089 --> 00:07:37,700
You know, I can't tell
you the number of sweaters
161
00:07:37,724 --> 00:07:39,159
that end up as scarves.
162
00:07:39,192 --> 00:07:41,060
Are you guys ready to order
or do you need a minute?
163
00:07:41,061 --> 00:07:42,462
Thank God! No,
no, no, I'm ready.
164
00:07:42,495 --> 00:07:45,065
I'm gonna do the-the,
the spaghetti,
165
00:07:45,098 --> 00:07:47,734
and the chicken marsala,
and the bruschetta.
166
00:07:47,767 --> 00:07:48,902
Um, and more of this bread.
167
00:07:48,935 --> 00:07:50,970
- Please.
- Oh, wow!
168
00:07:51,071 --> 00:07:52,839
- Woof!
- Thanks.
169
00:07:52,872 --> 00:07:55,475
Uh, yeah, we're
gonna share the Caesar salad,
170
00:07:55,508 --> 00:07:58,545
and then, uh, the-the
veal par-ma-ji-yana.
171
00:07:58,578 --> 00:07:59,555
Peter doesn't eat veal.
172
00:07:59,579 --> 00:08:01,514
- Yeah, I do.
- He does.
173
00:08:01,548 --> 00:08:03,826
What? Don't you remember that
video that we watched in college
174
00:08:03,850 --> 00:08:05,685
about veal farming,
you had a panic attack.
175
00:08:05,719 --> 00:08:07,053
You joined the
animal rights club.
176
00:08:07,087 --> 00:08:09,222
- No, I didn't.
- You were dating that girl Pond.
177
00:08:09,255 --> 00:08:11,257
- Her name was Lake.
- You ate hemp meat.
178
00:08:11,291 --> 00:08:13,460
That was, like, no, that
was a long time ago.
179
00:08:13,493 --> 00:08:15,933
Yeah. You went through a really
long phase with the hemp meat.
180
00:08:16,029 --> 00:08:18,398
- Long time ago.
- It was a long time ago.
181
00:08:18,431 --> 00:08:20,600
- No...
- Long time ago...
182
00:08:20,633 --> 00:08:22,602
All right, sorry.
The-the first time I-I
183
00:08:22,635 --> 00:08:24,036
cooked for you, I
made veal meatballs.
184
00:08:24,037 --> 00:08:26,106
Yeah, that was.. They
were-they were delicious.
185
00:08:26,139 --> 00:08:29,042
You cried. You cried and
you said that it was,
186
00:08:29,075 --> 00:08:30,744
um, because you were
in love with me.
187
00:08:30,777 --> 00:08:33,346
- It was mostly because of that.
- Because of the veal?
188
00:08:33,380 --> 00:08:35,081
It was not because of the veal.
189
00:08:35,115 --> 00:08:37,917
Honey, those cows are put in
little tiny cages with no light.
190
00:08:37,951 --> 00:08:39,729
Peter, it's not about
the cows. You lied to me.
191
00:08:39,753 --> 00:08:41,254
I know. I love you.
I'm sorry I lied
192
00:08:41,287 --> 00:08:42,932
'cause I love you, I didn't
wanna hurt your feelings.
193
00:08:42,956 --> 00:08:45,392
I've made you veal like a
hundred times since then.
194
00:08:45,425 --> 00:08:47,059
I know.
195
00:08:50,163 --> 00:08:53,199
- Are you laughing at me?
- No, I'm laughing at him.
196
00:08:53,233 --> 00:08:54,534
Um, that's so, like, Peter to
197
00:08:54,567 --> 00:08:56,045
reinvent himself for the
girlfriend of the week.
198
00:08:56,069 --> 00:08:57,837
Wow!
199
00:08:57,871 --> 00:08:59,649
She's not the girlfriend
of the week, Lexa. Come on.
200
00:08:59,673 --> 00:09:01,408
Oh, no. Sorry. I
didn't mean it like...
201
00:09:01,441 --> 00:09:02,752
- It's fine.
- No, seriously.
202
00:09:02,776 --> 00:09:04,353
Don't be mad at him.
Don't be mad at him.
203
00:09:04,377 --> 00:09:05,845
He's perfect. Be mad at me.
204
00:09:05,879 --> 00:09:08,782
- I'm the idiot. I'm stoned.
- Oh.
205
00:09:08,815 --> 00:09:11,117
- She's not stoned. No, you're...
- Yes, I am.
206
00:09:11,151 --> 00:09:12,919
Remember you gave me
that dry bag of weed?
207
00:09:13,019 --> 00:09:14,163
Not stoned, you're not stoned.
208
00:09:15,822 --> 00:09:19,426
- Yeah, it's just really funny.
- No, I'm sorry.
209
00:09:19,459 --> 00:09:21,428
- Honey.
- I had a cough and itching.
210
00:09:21,461 --> 00:09:24,164
No, no, hold me hand. Hold
me hand. Hold me hand.
211
00:09:24,197 --> 00:09:26,466
I'm from Ireland.
Come on, hold my hand.
212
00:09:33,440 --> 00:09:34,741
Lexa's great.
213
00:09:34,774 --> 00:09:36,509
I didn't realize you
guys were so close.
214
00:09:40,180 --> 00:09:41,247
Are we having a fight?
215
00:09:41,281 --> 00:09:43,616
I don't know.
Should we be having a fight?
216
00:09:43,650 --> 00:09:45,127
- Well, about what?
- I don't know.
217
00:09:45,151 --> 00:09:46,662
You tell me. What are
we fighting about?
218
00:09:46,686 --> 00:09:48,321
- Nothing?
- Okay.
219
00:09:48,355 --> 00:09:49,456
Then we're not fighting.
220
00:09:52,058 --> 00:09:57,497
Okay. I'm sorry that I
lied about the veal thing.
221
00:09:57,530 --> 00:09:59,366
I know. But you
don't lie to her.
222
00:09:59,399 --> 00:10:01,868
Well, it's because it's
impossible to hurt her feelings.
223
00:10:01,901 --> 00:10:03,069
Her heart is buried behind
224
00:10:03,103 --> 00:10:05,038
a Shawshank level
security system.
225
00:10:05,071 --> 00:10:07,374
He famously escapes
in that movie.
226
00:10:07,407 --> 00:10:08,842
I'm sorry that I lied. I just,
227
00:10:08,875 --> 00:10:10,353
I hate being the person
to hurt your feelings.
228
00:10:10,377 --> 00:10:12,645
I get why you did it. I just...
229
00:10:12,679 --> 00:10:15,148
I'd rather you be honest
than spare my feelings.
230
00:10:15,181 --> 00:10:18,852
- I'm sorry. I won't lie anymore.
- There's a window of amnesty.
231
00:10:18,885 --> 00:10:20,720
Wanna get anything
off your chest?
232
00:10:20,754 --> 00:10:23,490
- I hate your mom.
- Are you serious?
233
00:10:23,523 --> 00:10:26,192
I have said that she's been a
nightmare for years and years,
234
00:10:26,226 --> 00:10:28,528
and you always defend her.
235
00:10:28,561 --> 00:10:30,072
- That's really weird.
- I know. I mean...
236
00:10:30,096 --> 00:10:31,941
If she had a really hard
childhood, I would understand...
237
00:10:31,965 --> 00:10:33,967
No, she doesn't.
There's like no reason.
238
00:10:34,000 --> 00:10:35,645
She didn't come from a
broken home. She doesn't have
239
00:10:35,669 --> 00:10:37,504
a weird uncle, she
just hates waiters
240
00:10:37,537 --> 00:10:41,107
and puppies and Keanu
Reeves which is...
241
00:10:41,141 --> 00:10:43,109
- I love Keanu Reeves.
- I know you do.
242
00:10:43,143 --> 00:10:45,645
- You really love Keanu Reeves.
- Yeah, I love Keanu Reeves.
243
00:10:45,679 --> 00:10:47,514
Yeah.
244
00:10:47,547 --> 00:10:50,183
- Whoa! Sheryl doesn't.
- Yeah.
245
00:10:50,216 --> 00:10:52,719
Yeah, she thinks he's
too good-looking,
246
00:10:52,752 --> 00:10:54,054
which is like, "What, why?"
247
00:10:54,087 --> 00:10:56,222
I can't unpack your
mom's sexual repression.
248
00:10:56,256 --> 00:10:58,525
- That's a bridge too far.
- I know.
249
00:10:58,558 --> 00:11:00,760
- Yeah.
- Anything else?
250
00:11:00,794 --> 00:11:02,562
- No.
- Because the window's closing.
251
00:11:02,595 --> 00:11:04,130
- That's all I got.
- Okay.
252
00:11:04,164 --> 00:11:07,067
- That's it? Love you.
- I love you.
253
00:11:10,570 --> 00:11:12,672
Wait, wait, wait, I actually
can't have sex with you
254
00:11:12,706 --> 00:11:14,050
'cause I'm thinking
about your mom now.
255
00:11:14,074 --> 00:11:15,184
That's weird. I'm
thinking about your dad.
256
00:11:15,208 --> 00:11:16,509
But I'm, like,
I'm kinda into it.
257
00:11:16,543 --> 00:11:17,544
- Okay. Wait.
- Okay.
258
00:11:17,577 --> 00:11:19,546
- Okay. Wait. All right.
- Okay.
259
00:11:23,350 --> 00:11:24,560
You're kidding now,
right? About my dad.
260
00:11:24,584 --> 00:11:26,086
No.
261
00:11:53,813 --> 00:11:54,981
Want to watch something?
262
00:11:56,783 --> 00:11:58,785
I'm working and
not talking to you
263
00:11:58,818 --> 00:12:00,787
because you were such
a dick at dinner.
264
00:12:00,820 --> 00:12:02,555
Seriously?
265
00:12:02,589 --> 00:12:05,325
You called my girlfriend,
who I'm proposing to,
266
00:12:05,358 --> 00:12:07,127
a girl of the
week, like, really?
267
00:12:07,160 --> 00:12:09,829
Not my finest moment, I'll admit
to that. I'm sorry, really.
268
00:12:09,863 --> 00:12:11,464
You need to apologize
to her tomorrow.
269
00:12:11,498 --> 00:12:13,233
Done. Totally. Got it.
270
00:12:14,601 --> 00:12:17,837
- Dick.
- You love me.
271
00:12:17,871 --> 00:12:19,281
Both can be true.
You're like my annoying
272
00:12:19,305 --> 00:12:21,073
Chihuahua that pees on
the rug and eats my socks.
273
00:12:21,074 --> 00:12:25,078
Well, I also fit in the purse
and love Taco Bell. Arf!
274
00:12:29,649 --> 00:12:30,984
What's on?
275
00:12:31,084 --> 00:12:33,119
E! network's movies
be all about love.
276
00:12:35,121 --> 00:12:35,922
Sweet!
277
00:13:15,929 --> 00:13:18,098
Oh, sorry, did I wake you?
278
00:13:18,131 --> 00:13:23,236
I'm late. I'm late. I'm late!
I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm fine.
279
00:13:23,269 --> 00:13:25,271
- You okay?
- Son of a mother!
280
00:13:30,176 --> 00:13:33,513
- Morning! Yeah, there you go.
- Hi, there!
281
00:13:35,515 --> 00:13:37,082
You look like you just
dropped out of an ad
282
00:13:37,083 --> 00:13:40,320
for a well-balanced breakfast.
283
00:13:40,353 --> 00:13:43,356
I mean, thank you.
284
00:13:44,691 --> 00:13:46,793
Hey, sorry about
dinner last night.
285
00:13:46,826 --> 00:13:48,661
Yeah, you know, Peter's
talked about you
286
00:13:48,695 --> 00:13:51,564
since we started dating, you're
just not what I expected.
287
00:13:51,598 --> 00:13:52,899
It's hard to capture
288
00:13:52,932 --> 00:13:54,467
the magnitude of my
greatness in words.
289
00:13:54,501 --> 00:13:58,204
Yeah, exactly. Don't get me
wrong, he sang your praises.
290
00:13:58,238 --> 00:14:01,708
Talked about how funny
and smart you are.
291
00:14:01,741 --> 00:14:03,410
What's happening? Are
you trying to smash?
292
00:14:05,879 --> 00:14:09,082
No, no. I'm just
trying to understand
293
00:14:09,115 --> 00:14:11,217
why the two of you
never got together.
294
00:14:11,251 --> 00:14:14,554
- Me and Peter? No. Never.
- Mm-hmm.
295
00:14:14,587 --> 00:14:16,198
I mean, maybe if the
circumstances were different,
296
00:14:16,222 --> 00:14:18,692
but... no, the timing
was never right.
297
00:14:18,725 --> 00:14:21,194
So it was just the, the
timing that stopped you two?
298
00:14:23,196 --> 00:14:25,131
You're asking an
impossible question.
299
00:14:25,165 --> 00:14:26,766
Well, haven't you
ever wondered, like...
300
00:14:28,068 --> 00:14:29,969
I wonder about all
my life choices.
301
00:14:30,070 --> 00:14:31,671
You're avoiding the question.
302
00:14:31,705 --> 00:14:34,541
- It's an insane question.
- Maybe.
303
00:14:37,243 --> 00:14:41,348
Well, um, this was
helpful. Thank you.
304
00:14:41,381 --> 00:14:42,749
You're welcome.
Thank you for this.
305
00:14:42,782 --> 00:14:44,317
- Mm-hmm.
- Mmm.
306
00:14:46,152 --> 00:14:47,320
She was trying to smash.
307
00:14:59,566 --> 00:15:02,435
- This place is really nice.
- Yeah, do you like it?
308
00:15:02,469 --> 00:15:04,104
Can I get you started
with some drinks?
309
00:15:04,137 --> 00:15:07,207
- Yes, um, champagne?
- Uh, I'll get a vodka soda.
310
00:15:07,240 --> 00:15:09,109
Oh, come on, live a little.
311
00:15:09,142 --> 00:15:10,477
Okay, I'll get a vodka, no soda.
312
00:15:10,510 --> 00:15:12,479
She'll get a champagne
and vodka soda.
313
00:15:12,512 --> 00:15:14,123
- I-I don't want champagne.
- We'll get the champagne.
314
00:15:14,147 --> 00:15:15,448
I'm not sure what to do here...
315
00:15:15,482 --> 00:15:17,159
Just bring, uh, two
champagnes, vodka soda,
316
00:15:17,183 --> 00:15:18,794
and I'll just drink it
if you don't want it.
317
00:15:18,818 --> 00:15:20,420
- You drove.
- Yeah, we can Uber.
318
00:15:20,453 --> 00:15:22,054
Pick up the car
tomorrow. It's fine.
319
00:15:22,055 --> 00:15:24,524
- You're acting deranged.
- Yeah, I feel deranged.
320
00:15:24,557 --> 00:15:26,793
- So, yeah, no, I'm good though.
- Okay.
321
00:15:26,826 --> 00:15:28,170
- Do I seem weird?
- Yeah, a little bit.
322
00:15:28,194 --> 00:15:29,538
- No, I'm feeling good.
- Yeah, oh, wow!
323
00:15:29,562 --> 00:15:32,499
That was really fast,
um...
324
00:15:32,532 --> 00:15:36,069
- Good. Thank you. Perfect.
- You're welcome.
325
00:15:36,102 --> 00:15:38,938
- Thank you so much. Yeah.
- You're welcome.
326
00:15:43,543 --> 00:15:46,346
Honey, are you
okay? Are you okay?
327
00:15:47,213 --> 00:15:49,816
There it is. I was
looking for it.
328
00:15:49,849 --> 00:15:51,694
Um, okay, that was supposed
to be in the champagne,
329
00:15:51,718 --> 00:15:53,353
but it came outta your mouth.
330
00:15:53,386 --> 00:15:54,830
Um, it was supposed to
be in the champagne.
331
00:15:54,854 --> 00:15:56,222
Oh, my God!
332
00:15:58,858 --> 00:16:01,861
- Taylor...
- What?
333
00:16:06,800 --> 00:16:11,171
Taylor, I know we've only
been together for three years,
334
00:16:11,204 --> 00:16:13,239
but I feel like I've
known you my whole life.
335
00:16:13,273 --> 00:16:16,810
My mornings don't start until
I'm waking up next to you
336
00:16:16,843 --> 00:16:18,854
and they don't end until
you're laying in bed with me.
337
00:16:18,878 --> 00:16:20,046
Oh God!
338
00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:22,382
I just, I can't
believe I found you.
339
00:16:22,415 --> 00:16:25,050
I would love to spend the
rest of my life with you.
340
00:16:25,051 --> 00:16:29,054
So Taylor Bethesda Hamelin,
341
00:16:29,055 --> 00:16:30,190
will you marry me?
342
00:16:31,791 --> 00:16:34,894
I... I...
- Are you crying?
343
00:16:34,928 --> 00:16:37,897
- Yeah. Yes, I...
- Yes? Yes? She said yes!
344
00:16:40,367 --> 00:16:42,235
- No. No!
- Thank you.
345
00:16:44,738 --> 00:16:46,473
- No!
- No.
346
00:16:46,506 --> 00:16:48,441
Yes, thank you,
that's very talented
347
00:16:48,475 --> 00:16:50,243
but we don't need music
right now, thank you.
348
00:16:50,276 --> 00:16:52,879
You can all get back to
your dinner. Thank you.
349
00:16:52,912 --> 00:16:54,881
Can you just get up?
350
00:16:56,383 --> 00:16:58,351
Wait. I think I'm
having a panic attack.
351
00:16:58,385 --> 00:17:00,429
- Hey, I do love you...
- Wait, wait. I can't breathe.
352
00:17:00,453 --> 00:17:02,122
- Okay. Honey.
- I can't see.
353
00:17:02,155 --> 00:17:03,599
- Just stop for a second?
- I'm having a pa-panic attack.
354
00:17:03,623 --> 00:17:05,792
- I, I do love you...
- I am having a panic attack.
355
00:17:05,825 --> 00:17:06,826
Hey, can you stop?
356
00:17:11,631 --> 00:17:14,167
Okay, yep.
357
00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:17,037
Peter, I love you more than
I can express in words,
358
00:17:17,070 --> 00:17:18,814
but something about this
doesn't feel right...
359
00:17:18,838 --> 00:17:20,507
You-you-you're not you're ready.
360
00:17:20,540 --> 00:17:22,351
Well, what do you want
me to do to prove to you
361
00:17:22,375 --> 00:17:23,786
that I am ready, like,
would you like me
362
00:17:23,810 --> 00:17:25,912
to tattoo your name on my ass?
363
00:17:25,945 --> 00:17:27,089
The fact that you'd
even suggest that
364
00:17:27,113 --> 00:17:28,515
proves my point,
you're immature.
365
00:17:28,548 --> 00:17:30,383
I thought you liked
that about me.
366
00:17:30,417 --> 00:17:32,218
I like that you're
spontaneous and fun
367
00:17:32,252 --> 00:17:33,787
and you get me out
of my own head.
368
00:17:33,820 --> 00:17:35,655
But-but when I saw
you and Lexa together,
369
00:17:35,689 --> 00:17:38,291
i-it proved to me that
it's more than that.
370
00:17:38,324 --> 00:17:39,693
- You're-you're a child.
- Okay.
371
00:17:39,726 --> 00:17:41,661
Well, let me be your
child bride then.
372
00:17:41,695 --> 00:17:45,865
- My what? No! No!
- Like, I'll be your child bride.
373
00:17:45,899 --> 00:17:48,868
I think there's just, like,
part of you i-i-is stuck in
374
00:17:48,902 --> 00:17:52,605
your past, stuck in whatever
you and Lexa share together.
375
00:17:52,639 --> 00:17:55,175
And until you put that behind
you, I can't be with you.
376
00:17:55,208 --> 00:17:57,477
I don't understand why
you keep bringing up Lexa.
377
00:17:57,510 --> 00:17:59,813
I just don't want you to wake
up in five years and realize
378
00:17:59,846 --> 00:18:01,314
you married the wrong person.
379
00:18:01,348 --> 00:18:03,550
It's not gonna happen, Taylor.
380
00:18:03,583 --> 00:18:06,286
- Taylor?
- I'm really sorry, Peter.
381
00:18:07,854 --> 00:18:09,022
Oh, my God!
382
00:18:12,025 --> 00:18:13,193
Oh, my God!
383
00:18:16,763 --> 00:18:18,565
She was kidding.
384
00:18:21,034 --> 00:18:22,235
She'll come back.
385
00:18:33,345 --> 00:18:34,313
Peter?
386
00:18:36,181 --> 00:18:37,292
Where's Taylor? I
thought you guys were
387
00:18:37,316 --> 00:18:38,550
staying at The Drake tonight.
388
00:18:44,556 --> 00:18:45,624
Peter?
389
00:18:47,593 --> 00:18:50,662
- Do you wanna talk about it?
- No!
390
00:18:54,600 --> 00:18:55,567
There's booze here.
391
00:18:57,636 --> 00:19:00,472
I'll tell you what,
I'll start drinking,
392
00:19:00,506 --> 00:19:02,374
in honor of you and
these tough times,
393
00:19:02,408 --> 00:19:05,144
and if you wanna join me,
you're more than welcome to.
394
00:19:10,616 --> 00:19:15,187
Okay. I'm drinking alone
now. But it's in solidarity.
395
00:19:15,220 --> 00:19:18,157
We're gonna get through
this together, you, me,
396
00:19:18,190 --> 00:19:19,425
and this bottle of vodka.
397
00:19:27,333 --> 00:19:29,268
Okay. Enough, Peter.
398
00:19:30,536 --> 00:19:32,171
It's been days.
399
00:19:32,204 --> 00:19:36,308
If you don't open this door,
I'm gonna break it down.
400
00:19:36,342 --> 00:19:38,677
I'm gonna have the fire
department break it down.
401
00:19:38,711 --> 00:19:39,712
It's open.
402
00:19:45,250 --> 00:19:47,186
Okay. I'm here to help.
403
00:19:47,219 --> 00:19:48,863
I didn't know what stage
of grief you would be in,
404
00:19:48,887 --> 00:19:50,389
so I brought choices.
405
00:19:50,422 --> 00:19:53,225
So we have low fat ice
cream and romantic comedies.
406
00:19:53,258 --> 00:19:54,793
Pizza pockets and
kung fu movies.
407
00:19:54,827 --> 00:19:56,328
Or whiskey and porn.
408
00:19:58,764 --> 00:20:00,632
Okay, we'll start with
Sleepless in Seattle
409
00:20:00,666 --> 00:20:03,435
and end with When
Harry bones Sally.
410
00:20:03,469 --> 00:20:06,205
- Just give me a second.
- Okay.
411
00:20:13,412 --> 00:20:15,848
- Okay, I'm ready.
- Here we go.
412
00:20:15,881 --> 00:20:18,884
- Starting with a rom-com.
- I don't like it.
413
00:20:18,917 --> 00:20:20,285
- This is your medicine.
- Uh!
414
00:20:20,319 --> 00:20:22,888
Um, yum yum. Oooh!
415
00:20:22,921 --> 00:20:25,891
I hate everyone in
the world except you.
416
00:20:25,924 --> 00:20:29,495
Oh, yeah. Time for
Shaolin Soccer.
417
00:20:29,528 --> 00:20:30,329
Yaah!
418
00:20:30,362 --> 00:20:32,464
But I think they're
making dumplings
419
00:20:32,498 --> 00:20:34,933
and then they're
soccer involved.
420
00:20:34,967 --> 00:20:37,169
Open mouth and eat pizza.
421
00:20:37,202 --> 00:20:38,504
This is gonna be
the sexiest time
422
00:20:38,537 --> 00:20:39,905
that we've ever had right now.
423
00:20:39,938 --> 00:20:43,342
- Oh, shit!
- Oh, my God! What the...
424
00:20:43,375 --> 00:20:45,744
Look, keep looking at it.
425
00:20:45,778 --> 00:20:48,747
I thought we were gonna spend
the rest of my life together.
426
00:20:48,781 --> 00:20:51,283
And then it turned
out that I'm not now.
427
00:20:51,316 --> 00:20:52,918
I just don't know
what to do anymore.
428
00:21:16,141 --> 00:21:19,445
Emilio Estevez was our waiter
last night at Red Lobster.
429
00:21:19,478 --> 00:21:22,948
- There's no way it was him.
- Oh! It was. Well...
430
00:21:22,981 --> 00:21:25,584
You and me, tomorrow night,
Red Lobster, Emilio Estevez.
431
00:21:25,617 --> 00:21:27,119
I'm not going to Red
Lobster with you.
432
00:21:27,152 --> 00:21:29,455
Because I got better things
to do than stalk somebody
433
00:21:29,488 --> 00:21:31,690
who probably doesn't even
resemble Emilio Estevez.
434
00:21:31,724 --> 00:21:34,226
And also I don't want to get
banned at another Red Lobster.
435
00:21:34,259 --> 00:21:35,994
What did you do?
436
00:21:36,095 --> 00:21:38,073
- I don't wanna talk about it.
- I'd love you to talk about it.
437
00:21:38,097 --> 00:21:42,001
Then fine, let's just say,
I realized you can actually
438
00:21:42,101 --> 00:21:44,737
get seasick from just
eating from a shellfish.
439
00:21:44,770 --> 00:21:47,706
Like, I-I-I knew it was a thing,
but I never realized, like,
440
00:21:47,740 --> 00:21:49,975
you could, just don't mix
oysters, lobsters, shrimps,
441
00:21:50,009 --> 00:21:51,643
and crabs all in one go.
442
00:21:58,650 --> 00:22:02,654
- Oh, God!
- You look like shit.
443
00:22:02,688 --> 00:22:03,589
Taylor left me.
444
00:22:03,622 --> 00:22:05,891
- I proposed and she left.
- Yeah, I know.
445
00:22:05,924 --> 00:22:07,836
Everyone at the office
heard you bathroom crying.
446
00:22:07,860 --> 00:22:09,537
- Thank you.
- I don't know what to do, Doug.
447
00:22:09,561 --> 00:22:12,063
I tried emailing,
calling, texting.
448
00:22:12,064 --> 00:22:13,766
She's ignoring me at the office.
449
00:22:13,799 --> 00:22:17,068
I even sent her an Edible
Arrangement and then an EpiPen
450
00:22:17,069 --> 00:22:20,071
'cause she's allergic to
pineapples and I didn't want
451
00:22:20,072 --> 00:22:21,940
to give her the wrong idea.
452
00:22:21,974 --> 00:22:24,143
Hey! What can I do to help?
453
00:22:24,176 --> 00:22:25,854
I don't know, man. How do
I stop feeling like this?
454
00:22:25,878 --> 00:22:28,079
Oh, easy. Death is
the most immediate
455
00:22:28,080 --> 00:22:30,382
option but second to that,
start dating someone else.
456
00:22:30,416 --> 00:22:31,617
It's only been a week.
457
00:22:31,650 --> 00:22:33,419
I know, but to get
over one person,
458
00:22:33,452 --> 00:22:35,721
you got to get under another.
459
00:22:35,754 --> 00:22:37,856
Sorry, I've been watching
a lot of Sex and the City.
460
00:22:37,890 --> 00:22:38,891
I'm a Samantha.
461
00:22:40,259 --> 00:22:41,460
What am I going to do?
462
00:22:41,493 --> 00:22:43,094
Have you ever tried
online dating?
463
00:22:43,095 --> 00:22:44,763
Yeah, I'm awful at it. My bios
464
00:22:44,797 --> 00:22:47,566
are super awkward and
I'm bad at dick pics.
465
00:22:47,599 --> 00:22:49,968
Dude, you need a ring
light and a low angle.
466
00:22:50,002 --> 00:22:52,438
It's a good shot.
Trust. All right.
467
00:22:52,471 --> 00:22:54,873
If online dating is a
no-go, why not try for
468
00:22:54,907 --> 00:22:56,175
someone you already know?
469
00:22:56,208 --> 00:22:58,210
I don't like most people I know.
470
00:22:58,243 --> 00:22:59,878
Yeah, what about
Carol from accounting?
471
00:22:59,912 --> 00:23:01,389
You know, now that she's
gotten her halitosis under
472
00:23:01,413 --> 00:23:03,047
control, she's kind
of the office babe.
473
00:23:03,048 --> 00:23:07,386
- Who? Never heard of Carol.
- Yeah, we saw her on Monday.
474
00:23:07,419 --> 00:23:10,456
Ca-rol. We're always
like, "Oh, there's Carol!"
475
00:23:10,489 --> 00:23:12,725
- Darryl?
- What?
476
00:23:12,758 --> 00:23:14,169
- I have an awkward question.
- Okay.
477
00:23:14,193 --> 00:23:15,494
How come we never went out?
478
00:23:15,527 --> 00:23:16,771
I don't want to kick
you while you're down.
479
00:23:16,795 --> 00:23:18,297
Having said that, I would rather
480
00:23:18,330 --> 00:23:19,607
have sex with that couch
you had in college.
481
00:23:19,631 --> 00:23:20,933
Oh, the one with the smells?
482
00:23:20,966 --> 00:23:22,701
The one that had a
squirrel living in it.
483
00:23:22,735 --> 00:23:27,071
- Right. Why? I'm a catch.
- You're not really my type.
484
00:23:27,072 --> 00:23:28,741
- Unemployed?
- Touche.
485
00:23:28,774 --> 00:23:30,085
You know, this is the
first time we've both
486
00:23:30,109 --> 00:23:31,910
been single at the same
time since college.
487
00:23:31,944 --> 00:23:33,955
- Where are you going with this?
- Let me just take you on a date.
488
00:23:33,979 --> 00:23:35,881
Friends shouldn't
rebound with friends.
489
00:23:35,914 --> 00:23:38,082
- Why? You're my favorite hang.
- Peter. Come on.
490
00:23:38,083 --> 00:23:40,386
You're the only person I can
be completely honest with.
491
00:23:40,419 --> 00:23:41,754
Your lumpy parts
don't disgust me.
492
00:23:41,787 --> 00:23:43,922
- Wow, flattery. Uh-huh.
- All good things.
493
00:23:43,956 --> 00:23:46,625
What if we're like Meg Ryan in
all those movies, where, like,
494
00:23:46,658 --> 00:23:48,961
the answer has been right
there the entire time.
495
00:23:48,994 --> 00:23:51,630
Or what if we're like those
porn actresses that kind of
496
00:23:51,663 --> 00:23:53,475
look like Meg Ryan and the only
thing that's gonna come off
497
00:23:53,499 --> 00:23:55,367
this is I get screwed
and you leave?
498
00:23:55,401 --> 00:23:57,236
Well, have you never
thought about it at all?
499
00:23:58,804 --> 00:24:01,607
- Not even for a second?
- Honestly...
500
00:24:01,640 --> 00:24:03,575
Fine, yes, yes, of course
I've thought about it,
501
00:24:03,609 --> 00:24:05,286
but there's a reason I
never did anything about it.
502
00:24:05,310 --> 00:24:07,122
I mean, this kind of thing
only works out in the movies.
503
00:24:07,146 --> 00:24:09,314
- And in real life it's a mess.
- Yeah, but...
504
00:24:09,348 --> 00:24:10,449
we're already messes also.
505
00:24:10,482 --> 00:24:11,493
What's the worst
that can happen?
506
00:24:11,517 --> 00:24:12,584
A murder-suicide.
507
00:24:12,618 --> 00:24:14,753
That's pretty bad. Second worst?
508
00:24:14,787 --> 00:24:17,122
- We ruin the friendship.
- Not if we decide up front.
509
00:24:17,156 --> 00:24:19,792
We go, "Hey, guess what, we're
not gonna ruin the friendship.
510
00:24:19,825 --> 00:24:22,561
No matter what happens
or what does not happen."
511
00:24:22,594 --> 00:24:25,664
That's what we'll
say. You got it.
512
00:24:25,698 --> 00:24:27,733
I'll think about it.
Best and final offer.
513
00:24:27,766 --> 00:24:29,134
- All right, I'll take it.
- Okay.
514
00:24:29,168 --> 00:24:30,903
- Want to go bowling?
- No!
515
00:24:30,936 --> 00:24:34,106
- As friends.
- Maybe, we'll see.
516
00:24:38,644 --> 00:24:40,055
She's really
coming into her own.
517
00:24:40,079 --> 00:24:42,481
- I know.
- So cute. Look at that bee.
518
00:24:42,514 --> 00:24:44,316
I was so worried
she'd look like Doug.
519
00:24:44,350 --> 00:24:45,751
Why? Doug's handsome.
520
00:24:45,784 --> 00:24:47,486
Yeah, well, all the
parts that you can see,
521
00:24:47,519 --> 00:24:48,987
but he has the
weirdest body hair.
522
00:24:49,088 --> 00:24:51,156
He's got this patch on
his chest that looks like
523
00:24:51,190 --> 00:24:54,159
the bat signal, and his ass
is hairier than his head.
524
00:24:54,193 --> 00:24:55,761
- What? No.
- Yeah.
525
00:24:55,794 --> 00:24:57,706
For our fifth anniversary,
he decided to shave himself
526
00:24:57,730 --> 00:24:59,565
from the neck
down, huge mistake.
527
00:24:59,598 --> 00:25:00,875
So, does he just
always have, like,
528
00:25:00,899 --> 00:25:02,601
a full body 5 o' clock shadow?
529
00:25:02,634 --> 00:25:05,036
Oh, yeah, I'm having
sex with a chubby cactus
530
00:25:05,037 --> 00:25:06,739
for the rest of my life.
531
00:25:06,772 --> 00:25:09,508
But, I love him, so
whatever. You know?
532
00:25:09,541 --> 00:25:11,477
Anyways, that is enough
about me and Doug.
533
00:25:11,510 --> 00:25:15,381
Are you gonna go out with Peter?
534
00:25:15,414 --> 00:25:16,815
Oh, Peter told Doug
and Doug cannot
535
00:25:16,849 --> 00:25:18,484
keep a secret to save his life.
536
00:25:18,517 --> 00:25:21,320
Okay, well. I definitely
can't say yes.
537
00:25:21,353 --> 00:25:23,498
He just got dumped by the woman
he thought he was gonna spend
538
00:25:23,522 --> 00:25:25,056
the rest of his life with.
539
00:25:25,057 --> 00:25:27,192
Oh, my God, you
think I should yes?
540
00:25:27,226 --> 00:25:31,063
Okay, normally, I would say
no, but you're Lexa and Peter.
541
00:25:31,096 --> 00:25:32,898
We all knew you'd end
up together eventually.
542
00:25:32,931 --> 00:25:34,566
What do you mean,
"We all knew?"
543
00:25:34,600 --> 00:25:37,670
It just seemed inevitable.
He was in love with you
544
00:25:37,703 --> 00:25:39,714
all through college, and
you kept dating douche bags.
545
00:25:39,738 --> 00:25:41,549
- They weren't douche bags.
- Wife-beater Kenny?
546
00:25:41,573 --> 00:25:43,218
- Kenny never wore wife-beaters.
- No, Lexa.
547
00:25:43,242 --> 00:25:47,379
He seemed like the kind of
guy that would beat his wife.
548
00:25:47,413 --> 00:25:48,714
I'm not gonna argue that.
549
00:25:48,747 --> 00:25:51,350
Greg stole all your underwear,
550
00:25:51,383 --> 00:25:52,727
and Mark who had
sex with the ficus.
551
00:25:52,751 --> 00:25:55,721
Mark was sleep walker.
He was sleep-humping.
552
00:25:57,456 --> 00:25:58,957
I don't know, the point is,
553
00:25:58,991 --> 00:26:01,627
we figured you two would
find each other eventually.
554
00:26:01,660 --> 00:26:05,264
Why? Because a girl and a
guy can't just be friends?
555
00:26:05,297 --> 00:26:09,268
No, because he's just better
than the other guys you dated.
556
00:26:09,301 --> 00:26:11,046
And you two just always look
like you were having more
557
00:26:11,070 --> 00:26:13,572
fun together than
everyone else in the room.
558
00:26:13,605 --> 00:26:15,374
That's what it's about, right?
559
00:26:16,942 --> 00:26:17,910
Damn it.
560
00:26:17,943 --> 00:26:21,513
Are you worried it will
mess up the friendship?
561
00:26:21,547 --> 00:26:24,717
I'm worried because
I think you're right.
562
00:26:24,750 --> 00:26:26,261
Peter and I have something
great and if I can't make it
563
00:26:26,285 --> 00:26:28,387
work out with him, then I
won't be able to make it
564
00:26:28,420 --> 00:26:30,055
work out with anyone.
565
00:26:30,089 --> 00:26:32,424
Yeah, all due
respect, that's dumb.
566
00:26:32,458 --> 00:26:33,492
No, it isn't.
567
00:26:33,525 --> 00:26:35,894
You're letting fear control you.
568
00:26:35,928 --> 00:26:39,631
You are, if nothing
else, brave, Lexa.
569
00:26:39,665 --> 00:26:40,833
You should give it a go.
570
00:26:40,866 --> 00:26:42,066
Just take the time to figure out
571
00:26:42,067 --> 00:26:44,103
if you and Peter
are meant to be.
572
00:26:46,138 --> 00:26:49,274
- You know you want him.
- Maybe a little bit.
573
00:26:55,081 --> 00:26:56,282
Someone's at the door!
574
00:26:58,651 --> 00:27:00,553
Peter, could you grab the door?
575
00:27:08,028 --> 00:27:10,263
- Hi!
- Hi!
576
00:27:10,296 --> 00:27:12,399
- These are for you.
- What's happening?
577
00:27:12,432 --> 00:27:14,668
I'm picking you up for our date.
578
00:27:14,701 --> 00:27:16,202
Are we in a Hallmark movie?
579
00:27:16,236 --> 00:27:18,037
Most girls say "Thank you"
when you get them flowers.
580
00:27:18,038 --> 00:27:20,273
- I hate Hallmark movies.
- They say "Thank you."
581
00:27:20,306 --> 00:27:22,051
And then they say, "I'll
go put them in some water."
582
00:27:22,075 --> 00:27:24,044
- No, that's a lie.
- No, that's what they say.
583
00:27:24,077 --> 00:27:25,545
No, I secretly love
Hallmark movies.
584
00:27:25,578 --> 00:27:27,914
Oh, my God, same! Have
you seen Christmas Village
585
00:27:27,947 --> 00:27:29,125
Town for the Christmas People?
586
00:27:29,149 --> 00:27:30,650
- That's the best one.
- So good.
587
00:27:30,684 --> 00:27:34,654
- You're early.
- Yeah, there's no traffic.
588
00:27:34,688 --> 00:27:36,122
I'm not ready yet.
589
00:27:36,156 --> 00:27:39,392
Okay, I'll just
make myself at home.
590
00:27:39,426 --> 00:27:41,094
- Thank you.
- Welcome.
591
00:27:43,296 --> 00:27:45,532
I'll go put them in some water.
592
00:27:45,565 --> 00:27:46,566
Thank you.
593
00:27:58,845 --> 00:28:00,513
Thank God I made a reservation.
594
00:28:02,182 --> 00:28:04,150
Just one guy.
595
00:28:06,653 --> 00:28:09,089
Luke used to hate
places like this.
596
00:28:09,122 --> 00:28:12,258
Why did you guys
really break up?
597
00:28:12,292 --> 00:28:14,260
So sorry, but if this
was just a friend hang,
598
00:28:14,294 --> 00:28:15,571
you could totally
ask about my ex.
599
00:28:15,595 --> 00:28:18,231
- Lexa, come on.
- Show me a magic trick.
600
00:28:18,264 --> 00:28:19,575
I don't know what
you're talking about.
601
00:28:19,599 --> 00:28:21,277
First-date-Peter would
never leave the house
602
00:28:21,301 --> 00:28:22,478
without a magic
trick up his sleeve.
603
00:28:22,502 --> 00:28:24,304
- There's no magic trick.
- Okay, I get it.
604
00:28:24,337 --> 00:28:25,881
You don't want to bring
out your closer too early.
605
00:28:25,905 --> 00:28:28,308
- There's no magic trick.
- Really?
606
00:28:28,341 --> 00:28:30,486
- Okay, there's a magic trick.
- That's what I thought.
607
00:28:30,510 --> 00:28:32,688
If you casually lean forward
so I can see down your shirt.
608
00:28:32,712 --> 00:28:34,314
Excuse me.
609
00:28:34,347 --> 00:28:36,559
I mean it won't work in this
dress, but I know your moves.
610
00:28:36,583 --> 00:28:39,252
- I do not do that.
- Oh, really?
611
00:28:39,285 --> 00:28:40,653
Oh, that's so interesting.
612
00:28:40,687 --> 00:28:43,723
I didn't know coconuts
weren't really nuts.
613
00:28:43,757 --> 00:28:48,261
Oh, wait. Hold on. Weren't
really nuts. Huh, boob.
614
00:28:48,294 --> 00:28:50,530
Okay, I have never talked
about nuts on a first date.
615
00:28:50,563 --> 00:28:53,867
Uh, I wonder what other
nuts are not really nuts.
616
00:28:53,900 --> 00:28:55,468
Okay.
617
00:28:55,502 --> 00:28:58,338
I read a-an article in the
New Yorker the other day,
618
00:28:58,371 --> 00:29:00,140
it was fascinating.
619
00:29:00,173 --> 00:29:02,242
I just wanna talk about nuts.
620
00:29:02,275 --> 00:29:03,677
I know this artist in Cambodia,
621
00:29:03,710 --> 00:29:05,011
he makes sculptures
out of shoes.
622
00:29:05,045 --> 00:29:06,680
I love nuts.
623
00:29:06,713 --> 00:29:09,582
He reminds me of this artist
that we talked about in class.
624
00:29:09,616 --> 00:29:12,519
- Uh, the Ivy League.
- I love nuts so much.
625
00:29:12,552 --> 00:29:15,422
But not as much
as having no job.
626
00:29:18,758 --> 00:29:20,503
I think you're less
interesting than a gum ball.
627
00:29:20,527 --> 00:29:24,030
- Will you marry me? Screw you.
- What? Wait, what?
628
00:29:24,064 --> 00:29:26,375
If you think I'm such a loser,
then why are we even doing this?
629
00:29:26,399 --> 00:29:27,734
I-I-I don't think
you're a loser.
630
00:29:27,767 --> 00:29:29,536
Then what is that,
why are you making fun
631
00:29:29,569 --> 00:29:31,237
of the fact I don't
have a job right now?
632
00:29:31,271 --> 00:29:33,573
- I was just joking.
- It's not funny. Joke funnier.
633
00:29:42,949 --> 00:29:47,387
Ho! Ho! Ho!
Looking through the glass.
634
00:29:47,420 --> 00:29:51,091
Ho! Ho! Ho!
Looking over fence!
635
00:29:51,124 --> 00:29:53,058
Ho! Ho! Ho!
636
00:29:53,059 --> 00:29:58,932
I can't see anything except
my dad's friend Jacob.
637
00:29:58,965 --> 00:30:00,734
-Jacob! Jacob! Jacob!
638
00:30:00,767 --> 00:30:03,403
- Where are you, Jacob?
- Oh, my God, he's on fire!
639
00:30:03,436 --> 00:30:06,272
- He's burning!
- Oh, no! Jacob's on fire!
640
00:30:06,306 --> 00:30:08,375
- Call the fireman!
- Ding-dong!
641
00:30:08,408 --> 00:30:10,243
- Wee-ooh! Wee-ooh! Wee-ooh!
- I'm a fire...
642
00:30:10,276 --> 00:30:12,812
Please... You're disturbing
the other patrons.
643
00:30:12,846 --> 00:30:16,016
- I'm so sorry. Sorry.
- Totally zoned out.
644
00:30:16,049 --> 00:30:18,184
- Sorry about that!
- Thank you.
645
00:30:18,218 --> 00:30:20,587
Well, we'll never
doing this again.
646
00:30:20,620 --> 00:30:22,822
- Never again.
- Could not have gone worse.
647
00:30:25,325 --> 00:30:27,327
- What?
- Oh, I think I feel sick.
648
00:30:27,360 --> 00:30:30,430
- Oh, no, you don't.
- Yeah, no, yeah I do. Oh!
649
00:30:30,463 --> 00:30:33,366
- It's the other way.
- Ooh! Ooh! Oh!
650
00:30:33,400 --> 00:30:37,270
- Help!
- What? Help, how?
651
00:30:38,538 --> 00:30:40,140
Uh, we'll just get the bill.
652
00:30:44,878 --> 00:30:46,012
Oh, my God!
653
00:30:51,484 --> 00:30:53,853
Damn that Hole In
The Wall restaurant!
654
00:30:53,887 --> 00:30:55,989
Was it the restaurant
or the donut you ate
655
00:30:56,022 --> 00:30:58,091
out of the trash this morning?
656
00:30:58,124 --> 00:31:00,660
- You saw that?
- Yeah, unfortunately.
657
00:31:06,933 --> 00:31:08,368
I thought it was so good.
658
00:31:12,739 --> 00:31:16,476
But it did make me thirsty
enough to get like four chugs
659
00:31:16,509 --> 00:31:19,078
into that milk carton in
the back of your fridge
660
00:31:19,079 --> 00:31:21,748
before I realized
it had spoiled.
661
00:31:21,781 --> 00:31:25,151
It's amazing to me that
you're still alive.
662
00:31:25,185 --> 00:31:26,519
I'm a little cockroach.
663
00:31:33,460 --> 00:31:37,197
So is this the, um, worst
first date you've ever had or..
664
00:31:37,230 --> 00:31:38,732
Don't flatter yourself.
665
00:31:40,233 --> 00:31:41,835
This doesn't even make top five.
666
00:31:41,868 --> 00:31:45,705
- I'll get you water.
- Okay. Thank you.
667
00:31:58,752 --> 00:32:03,256
-Great place. Love the d
668
00:32:03,289 --> 00:32:07,527
- How was the date?
- Bodily fluids were involved...
669
00:32:07,560 --> 00:32:11,398
- No, not the good ones.
- Ew. Tell me more. No. Less.
670
00:32:11,431 --> 00:32:15,235
Ah, I'm torn.
Hold that thought.
671
00:32:15,268 --> 00:32:18,571
- Ah. Hey! Nice fit.
- Hi!
672
00:32:18,605 --> 00:32:20,072
She's going through
De Niro phase.
673
00:32:20,073 --> 00:32:21,708
She's obsessed with his style.
674
00:32:21,741 --> 00:32:25,211
Never seen the movies. I don't
know, kid TikTok is hell.
675
00:32:25,245 --> 00:32:27,079
Do you remember me? Last
time we saw each other
676
00:32:27,080 --> 00:32:28,715
was at the Rainforest Cafe?
677
00:32:28,748 --> 00:32:30,116
I got you that stuffed giraffe.
678
00:32:31,584 --> 00:32:32,485
No, not really, no.
679
00:32:32,519 --> 00:32:34,320
Can you get your finger
out of your mouth?
680
00:32:34,354 --> 00:32:36,156
Um, can you get your
nose out of my business?
681
00:32:36,189 --> 00:32:39,225
- Watch it.
- Oh, you're bleeding.
682
00:32:39,259 --> 00:32:41,561
Honey, don't suck your
blood. It's not healthy.
683
00:32:41,594 --> 00:32:43,930
Why won't anyone
just let me live?
684
00:32:46,866 --> 00:32:49,936
Are you sure you can handle that
'cause she can be a handful?
685
00:32:49,969 --> 00:32:51,604
- Good thing I have two hands.
- Okay.
686
00:32:51,638 --> 00:32:53,907
We'll be fine. I know CPR.
I'll Google everything else.
687
00:32:53,940 --> 00:32:58,011
Amazing! You're a life
saver. I really owe you one.
688
00:32:58,111 --> 00:33:00,914
Yeah, I was thinking
20 bucks an hour.
689
00:33:00,947 --> 00:33:04,351
- Oh.
- $18?
690
00:33:04,384 --> 00:33:05,552
Yeah, I...
691
00:33:05,585 --> 00:33:08,221
Sorry, I didn't realize this
was like a job for you, so.
692
00:33:08,254 --> 00:33:10,223
But that's fine. How
about 30 dollars an hour?
693
00:33:10,256 --> 00:33:12,392
- I... No!
- No, you know CPR.
694
00:33:12,425 --> 00:33:15,161
- I don't CPR, it's...
- I don't know CPR.
695
00:33:15,195 --> 00:33:16,930
I was saying that for effects.
696
00:33:16,963 --> 00:33:19,299
- I think you've earned it.
- I haven't done anything.
697
00:33:19,332 --> 00:33:21,201
I'm trying to end
this conversation
698
00:33:21,234 --> 00:33:22,736
the least awkward way possible.
699
00:33:22,769 --> 00:33:25,071
Got it! Thank you!
700
00:33:26,439 --> 00:33:28,074
- Be good!
- Love you!
701
00:33:32,479 --> 00:33:34,381
Blake?
702
00:33:34,414 --> 00:33:35,415
Blake?
703
00:33:36,850 --> 00:33:38,818
Don't come in.
704
00:33:38,852 --> 00:33:40,086
Okay!
705
00:33:45,225 --> 00:33:48,328
- What are you doing?
- Just working on something.
706
00:33:50,797 --> 00:33:54,100
An app that helps adults
find elite establishments
707
00:33:54,134 --> 00:33:56,836
in which to imbibe.
708
00:33:56,870 --> 00:33:58,338
What are you doing?
709
00:33:58,371 --> 00:33:59,906
Enjoying the slow
march to death,
710
00:33:59,939 --> 00:34:02,442
one level of Candy
Crush at a time.
711
00:34:02,475 --> 00:34:05,145
Nice!
712
00:34:18,224 --> 00:34:20,827
♪ We are born here
from another ♪
713
00:34:20,860 --> 00:34:22,896
♪ We are sisters...
714
00:34:22,929 --> 00:34:24,698
- Hello!
- Hello!
715
00:34:26,733 --> 00:34:27,701
Oh, don't be mad.
716
00:34:27,734 --> 00:34:29,445
I flushed a bunch of
candy corn down the toilet
717
00:34:29,469 --> 00:34:31,371
and it's making a weird noise.
718
00:34:31,404 --> 00:34:32,872
Why? Why would you do that?
719
00:34:32,906 --> 00:34:35,074
'Cause I thought it was
looking at me funny and I...
720
00:34:35,075 --> 00:34:36,409
- I have a surprise.
- What?
721
00:34:36,443 --> 00:34:38,545
- Can you get dressed? Yeah.
- Right now?
722
00:34:39,546 --> 00:34:40,947
♪ We were homeless
723
00:34:40,980 --> 00:34:45,084
♪ Like no other
alive smells... ♪
724
00:34:45,085 --> 00:34:47,320
- He-he-he-he!
- What are you... Whoa!
725
00:34:49,155 --> 00:34:51,090
Are we going to the
zoo? Or the planetarium?
726
00:34:51,091 --> 00:34:52,835
Well, I'm not taking you on
a middle school field trip.
727
00:34:52,859 --> 00:34:55,237
- Oh! Are we going to Spain?
- Yeah, we are walking to Spain.
728
00:34:55,261 --> 00:34:57,197
- Ha! I knew it.
- It's gonna take two years.
729
00:34:57,230 --> 00:34:59,098
Okay? Stop it.
Don't guess anymore.
730
00:34:59,099 --> 00:35:01,401
You're gonna love it, I promise.
731
00:35:01,434 --> 00:35:04,237
- Oh, are we going to Benihana?
- No!
732
00:35:04,270 --> 00:35:05,614
Okay, wait, keep
your eyeballs shut.
733
00:35:05,638 --> 00:35:06,606
Well, okay.
734
00:35:06,639 --> 00:35:08,608
Do not open your eyeball.
Ready? Keep going.
735
00:35:08,641 --> 00:35:10,353
Then what would be the point
of putting your hand there?
736
00:35:10,377 --> 00:35:12,054
- I can do it without your hand.
- Yeah, you're right.
737
00:35:12,078 --> 00:35:14,314
- Okay.
- Okay, ta-da!
738
00:35:14,347 --> 00:35:16,516
- What am I looking at?
- This is where we first met.
739
00:35:16,549 --> 00:35:19,886
- We first met in a lecture hall.
- No! Tha-that was Psych 102.
740
00:35:19,919 --> 00:35:21,321
This was the first spot. Okay,
741
00:35:21,354 --> 00:35:23,055
I was leaving a party
upstairs, remember?
742
00:35:23,056 --> 00:35:25,725
You were sitting literally
right there, drunk off your ass.
743
00:35:25,759 --> 00:35:27,737
I came up to you, I was like,
"Hey! Where do you live?"
744
00:35:27,761 --> 00:35:29,472
Because I wanted to make
sure you got home okay.
745
00:35:29,496 --> 00:35:31,464
- Such a freshman.
- But you forgot your address.
746
00:35:31,498 --> 00:35:33,209
You were like, "I forget!
I don't know where I live."
747
00:35:33,233 --> 00:35:35,635
And I was like, "Wait,
what?" But then,
748
00:35:35,669 --> 00:35:37,937
you did the entire speech
at the end of Rocky...
749
00:35:37,971 --> 00:35:39,773
Rocky 4, yes.
750
00:35:39,806 --> 00:35:42,142
And when you finished,
I was like, "Whoa!
751
00:35:42,175 --> 00:35:44,344
This person is the coolest,"
and so we became friends.
752
00:35:44,377 --> 00:35:45,645
- High five!
- Aww!
753
00:35:45,679 --> 00:35:46,889
Well, that story's
both sweet and creepy.
754
00:35:46,913 --> 00:35:48,448
How is it creepy?
755
00:35:48,481 --> 00:35:50,092
Because apparently I didn't
remember any of that night,
756
00:35:50,116 --> 00:35:52,261
and you were in the back of
the lecture hall leering at me.
757
00:35:52,285 --> 00:35:53,925
- Were you also pining?
- I wasn't pining.
758
00:35:53,953 --> 00:35:55,455
Leering and pining and lusting.
759
00:35:55,488 --> 00:35:57,557
Okay, you ruined a moment
we were supposed to have.
760
00:35:57,590 --> 00:35:59,091
- It smells like farts in here.
- We're done.
761
00:35:59,092 --> 00:36:00,427
- Oh.
- Off to tonight's spot?
762
00:36:00,460 --> 00:36:02,462
Oh, there's another spot
on this train of fun?
763
00:36:02,495 --> 00:36:05,799
- Yes. Miniature golf.
- Yay!
764
00:36:05,832 --> 00:36:08,134
Right, are you prepared
to have your masculinity
765
00:36:08,168 --> 00:36:09,569
challenged by a girl?
766
00:36:09,602 --> 00:36:11,036
Oh, you think you
can beat me at this?
767
00:36:11,037 --> 00:36:12,739
Oh, I know I can beat
you in this game.
768
00:36:12,772 --> 00:36:14,374
- Really?
- Oh, yeah.
769
00:36:14,407 --> 00:36:16,118
Every time I have played
you at this game, I won.
770
00:36:16,142 --> 00:36:18,278
Yeah, but I have
grown into my muscles,
771
00:36:18,311 --> 00:36:20,780
an-and you have withered with...
772
00:36:20,814 --> 00:36:22,916
Yeah? I don't even need to look.
773
00:36:22,949 --> 00:36:25,027
A gopher in roller skates
could beat you at this game.
774
00:36:25,051 --> 00:36:26,286
Well, I could beat a gopher
775
00:36:26,319 --> 00:36:27,954
with this golf club,
so, circle of life.
776
00:36:28,054 --> 00:36:30,132
I'm going to beat you so bad,
you'll think my name is Kenny.
777
00:36:30,156 --> 00:36:31,458
Jesus! Everyone hated him
778
00:36:31,491 --> 00:36:33,102
so much and no one said
anything about him?
779
00:36:33,126 --> 00:36:35,462
Oh, I said things. You're
just really stummer, stubborn.
780
00:36:35,495 --> 00:36:36,963
So you're just really stummer.
781
00:36:38,765 --> 00:36:42,736
- That does sound like me. Tink!
- That was a terrible shot.
782
00:36:42,769 --> 00:36:44,069
But you looked
really cute doing it.
783
00:36:44,070 --> 00:36:46,673
Oh, thanks.
784
00:36:46,706 --> 00:36:48,284
The best thing about
miniatures golf is that
785
00:36:48,308 --> 00:36:51,644
even when you're
losing, you're winning.
786
00:36:51,678 --> 00:36:53,646
Oh, son!
787
00:36:58,218 --> 00:37:02,188
- Ah! God, I love sports.
- I know you do.
788
00:37:02,222 --> 00:37:06,126
- Okay, hole two?
- Hole two, bitch!
789
00:37:06,159 --> 00:37:09,362
Okay, let's go! Oh,
my God! Watch out!
790
00:37:09,396 --> 00:37:12,799
Oh, my God! My God!
791
00:37:12,832 --> 00:37:15,235
What are you doing here?
792
00:37:16,569 --> 00:37:18,304
♪ When I feel myself
793
00:37:18,338 --> 00:37:21,107
♪ When it feels like I was
18 I'm a cat walking... ♪
794
00:37:23,877 --> 00:37:26,045
♪ My money don't
slap those weekend ♪
795
00:37:26,046 --> 00:37:29,115
♪ So rich that my currency
reaching too like ♪
796
00:37:29,149 --> 00:37:30,483
♪ A bus with a ceiling
797
00:37:30,517 --> 00:37:32,519
♪ Stretch your honey Kool-Aid
798
00:37:32,552 --> 00:37:34,187
♪ Shed that shoe lace
799
00:37:34,220 --> 00:37:37,190
♪ Like kicks fresh on
the new Range Rover ♪
800
00:37:37,223 --> 00:37:39,259
♪ Fresh on the coupe
801
00:37:39,292 --> 00:37:41,061
♪ Watch me go like this
802
00:37:41,094 --> 00:37:42,562
♪ Watch me go like this
803
00:37:42,595 --> 00:37:44,431
♪ Honey talk to the ceiling
804
00:37:44,464 --> 00:37:46,132
♪ Wake me up think
I'm dreaming ♪
805
00:37:47,300 --> 00:37:49,235
♪ Watch me go like this
806
00:37:49,269 --> 00:37:52,238
♪ Watch me go like this
807
00:37:52,272 --> 00:37:55,709
- Ooh!
- All right, okay, okay.
808
00:37:55,742 --> 00:37:58,345
- We're one with the wall.
- They can't see us.
809
00:37:58,378 --> 00:38:01,147
They can't see us if
we're part of the wall.
810
00:38:13,059 --> 00:38:14,728
Take me home.
811
00:38:14,761 --> 00:38:15,929
It's nicer.
812
00:38:19,332 --> 00:38:21,468
Okay, I'll look
out for your cat.
813
00:38:21,501 --> 00:38:23,036
Goodnight, Mrs. Yang.
814
00:38:35,749 --> 00:38:36,916
Are you gonna freak me up?
815
00:38:36,950 --> 00:38:38,418
Yeah, um, do you-do
you want me to...
816
00:38:38,451 --> 00:38:41,388
- Put on some music.
- Okay. Um...
817
00:38:41,421 --> 00:38:42,756
- Lexa.
- What's up?
818
00:38:57,737 --> 00:38:59,205
Yeah!
819
00:39:03,276 --> 00:39:04,444
Yeah!
820
00:39:05,779 --> 00:39:08,782
♪ I don't know why...
821
00:39:14,320 --> 00:39:18,458
♪ We're wasting time
822
00:39:22,529 --> 00:39:25,765
♪ You're all I need
823
00:39:29,302 --> 00:39:33,106
♪ Come away with me
824
00:39:39,512 --> 00:39:42,682
♪ We're in your eyes
825
00:39:48,221 --> 00:39:50,924
♪ Where am I
826
00:39:56,196 --> 00:39:58,965
♪ Make me believe
827
00:40:02,669 --> 00:40:06,373
♪ Come away with me...
828
00:40:23,123 --> 00:40:25,425
that if we continue
on this trajectory...
829
00:40:30,797 --> 00:40:31,831
Psst.
830
00:40:39,272 --> 00:40:40,273
Thank you.
831
00:40:55,955 --> 00:40:58,825
- Hey, home is this way.
- You have gymnastics.
832
00:40:58,858 --> 00:41:01,861
No! Gymnastics literally
makes me want to die.
833
00:41:01,895 --> 00:41:03,063
Why do I have to go?
834
00:41:03,096 --> 00:41:04,798
Because the family
calendar says so.
835
00:41:04,831 --> 00:41:07,367
- So?
- Good point.
836
00:41:07,400 --> 00:41:09,111
All right, if you wanna
skip I'm good with that.
837
00:41:09,135 --> 00:41:10,937
But if your mom asks,
you were feeling sick.
838
00:41:10,970 --> 00:41:12,372
You cool lying to your mom?
839
00:41:12,405 --> 00:41:14,874
I'm eight. Of course
I lie to my mother.
840
00:41:14,908 --> 00:41:15,975
All right.
841
00:41:48,141 --> 00:41:51,011
- You're so good.
- Practice makes perfect.
842
00:41:51,111 --> 00:41:52,345
There we go again.
843
00:41:54,147 --> 00:41:55,382
You should be at gymnastics.
844
00:41:55,415 --> 00:41:58,385
- She twisted her ankle.
- My appendix exploded.
845
00:41:58,418 --> 00:42:00,387
Okay. How about you go
get ready for dinner?
846
00:42:00,420 --> 00:42:01,221
Fine.
847
00:42:02,856 --> 00:42:05,625
- Wash your hands.
- Yep, yep!
848
00:42:05,658 --> 00:42:08,228
Sorry, I know I shouldn't
encourage her but...
849
00:42:08,261 --> 00:42:10,062
Oh, it's fine. I've seen
her on the balance beams,
850
00:42:10,063 --> 00:42:11,398
she's no Simone Biles.
851
00:42:12,632 --> 00:42:16,169
Okay, can you tell me about
what's happening with Peter?
852
00:42:16,202 --> 00:42:20,373
Everything is going good-ish.
853
00:42:20,407 --> 00:42:22,642
I mean, there's a reason why
we are best friends, right?
854
00:42:22,676 --> 00:42:24,411
He's sweet, he's funny but...
855
00:42:24,444 --> 00:42:26,312
I don't know, we've been
on a couple of dates
856
00:42:26,346 --> 00:42:28,715
and he still just feels
like he is my best friend
857
00:42:28,748 --> 00:42:30,082
who I sometimes make out with.
858
00:42:30,083 --> 00:42:33,353
This is very PG-13.
Have you had sex?
859
00:42:33,386 --> 00:42:35,088
No.
860
00:42:35,121 --> 00:42:37,891
So you haven't
seen his dick yet?
861
00:42:37,924 --> 00:42:39,826
I've seen his dick.
862
00:42:39,859 --> 00:42:42,562
- What? Okay.
- Through his jeans.
863
00:42:42,595 --> 00:42:44,397
I've not had sex with
him, so, I don't know.
864
00:42:44,431 --> 00:42:45,198
Oh.
865
00:42:45,231 --> 00:42:46,766
What if he is
really weird in bed?
866
00:42:46,800 --> 00:42:48,168
Even better.
867
00:42:48,201 --> 00:42:50,203
I dated a guy once,
he kept saying
868
00:42:50,236 --> 00:42:53,306
I'm having a very nice time,
while he was inside of me.
869
00:42:53,340 --> 00:42:55,408
- That's sweet.
- Ew! Sweet? No.
870
00:42:55,442 --> 00:42:57,253
That's what you say when you're
having tea with your Aunt Milred
871
00:42:57,277 --> 00:42:59,112
not when you're balls
deep in an 18-year-old.
872
00:42:59,145 --> 00:43:00,623
The best sex I ever
had was with this guy
873
00:43:00,647 --> 00:43:02,449
who used to collect my
hairs from the drain
874
00:43:02,482 --> 00:43:05,218
and make these little
dolls with them.
875
00:43:05,251 --> 00:43:07,087
He would make them
and then line them up,
876
00:43:07,120 --> 00:43:09,289
and he would name them
too, and they'd be like
877
00:43:09,322 --> 00:43:10,724
his neighbors and the baker
878
00:43:10,757 --> 00:43:12,459
and things like that,
but the sex was good.
879
00:43:12,492 --> 00:43:15,462
I promise, I promise, it
sounds weird. And it was weird.
880
00:43:15,495 --> 00:43:17,130
- Was it kinky?
- It was pretty kinky.
881
00:43:17,163 --> 00:43:19,366
Can you please have
sex with Peter?
882
00:43:21,067 --> 00:43:22,402
You obviously want to or we
883
00:43:22,435 --> 00:43:24,404
wouldn't be having
this conversation.
884
00:43:38,718 --> 00:43:40,754
- Hi.
- Hey.
885
00:43:40,787 --> 00:43:42,489
Uh, what are you doing here?
886
00:43:42,522 --> 00:43:46,493
Oh, um, I'm here to
get things that I left.
887
00:43:46,526 --> 00:43:49,229
Oh, okay. Uh, yeah, I didn't
see your stuff lying around.
888
00:43:49,262 --> 00:43:51,197
- My hair dryer?
- Hair dryer?
889
00:43:51,231 --> 00:43:53,533
- Yeah.
- Um, okay.
890
00:43:53,566 --> 00:43:54,877
Yeah, it's in the
bottom drawer...
891
00:43:54,901 --> 00:43:56,102
Okay.
892
00:44:02,542 --> 00:44:04,744
- That's... yeah, that's the one.
- Yeah.
893
00:44:04,778 --> 00:44:07,781
Um, is there
anything else here?
894
00:44:07,814 --> 00:44:09,349
Uh, how are you?
895
00:44:10,550 --> 00:44:12,285
I'm fine.
896
00:44:12,318 --> 00:44:15,054
- It's good.
- Yeah. Well, not particularly.
897
00:44:15,055 --> 00:44:16,523
Right. Yeah.
898
00:44:18,058 --> 00:44:19,626
Are you, you're okay?
899
00:44:21,127 --> 00:44:23,663
I'm fine.
900
00:44:23,697 --> 00:44:24,898
Okay.
901
00:44:24,931 --> 00:44:27,300
I'm double parked,
so, I should go.
902
00:44:28,768 --> 00:44:29,703
Taylor...
903
00:44:32,872 --> 00:44:34,808
Thanks.
904
00:44:34,841 --> 00:44:37,677
Don't know what I'd do,
it's my favorite device.
905
00:44:39,579 --> 00:44:40,547
Okay.
906
00:44:48,088 --> 00:44:50,223
- Were you talking to me?
- What?
907
00:44:50,256 --> 00:44:52,325
- I thought I heard voices.
- Uh, no.
908
00:44:52,359 --> 00:44:54,961
It was just like group of
men walking up the road.
909
00:44:54,994 --> 00:44:58,131
But I'm gonna take a quick
showie, shower.
910
00:44:59,532 --> 00:45:00,533
Okay.
911
00:45:07,841 --> 00:45:09,576
Peter! Your phone's ringing!
912
00:45:09,609 --> 00:45:12,712
It's okay,
just pick it up. Okay.
913
00:45:12,746 --> 00:45:14,514
Hello.
914
00:45:14,547 --> 00:45:15,548
What?
915
00:45:16,616 --> 00:45:17,650
For next weekend?
916
00:45:19,919 --> 00:45:22,589
Yep, I'll let him
know. Thank you.
917
00:45:49,315 --> 00:45:51,117
Lakeside Pines called earlier.
918
00:45:51,151 --> 00:45:52,919
- Oh, God, don't be mad.
- No, no, no.
919
00:45:52,952 --> 00:45:55,588
I'm not mad, I just don't
want this to be awkward.
920
00:45:55,622 --> 00:45:57,099
It makes sense that
you would wanna plan
921
00:45:57,123 --> 00:45:58,925
a great vacation
like that for her...
922
00:45:58,958 --> 00:46:00,827
-It's not for her. It's for us.
923
00:46:00,860 --> 00:46:02,495
- Really?
- Yeah, yeah.
924
00:46:02,529 --> 00:46:05,031
I thought it would be nice to
get away for a couple of days.
925
00:46:05,065 --> 00:46:07,167
- Just us. Yeah.
- Yeah. Okay.
926
00:46:07,200 --> 00:46:08,678
- Okay.
- We should go horseback riding.
927
00:46:08,702 --> 00:46:11,237
Well, it's dead of
winter but yeah.
928
00:46:11,271 --> 00:46:13,373
Then what are we
supposed to do out there?
929
00:46:13,406 --> 00:46:14,684
Kind of eliminates all
outdoor activities.
930
00:46:14,708 --> 00:46:18,078
I don't know.
There's lots to do.
931
00:46:18,111 --> 00:46:19,479
- Wait. Oh, my God.
- What?
932
00:46:19,512 --> 00:46:21,157
You didn't plan us a sex
vacation for us, did you?
933
00:46:21,181 --> 00:46:23,259
- What? No! No, no, I know that.
- Because we haven't even...
934
00:46:23,283 --> 00:46:24,527
That'd be like going
from zero to...
935
00:46:24,551 --> 00:46:26,152
You know,
a 100. Yeah, no.
936
00:46:26,186 --> 00:46:27,663
It was just... that-that
was like a break.
937
00:46:27,687 --> 00:46:29,589
It was a nice break,
I thought in my mind.
938
00:46:29,622 --> 00:46:32,092
This will be fun and the
photos were so idyllic.
939
00:46:32,125 --> 00:46:33,336
You do love Nora Ephron moment.
940
00:46:33,360 --> 00:46:38,164
- I do. Yeah. Okay.
- Okay. Okay. Mm.
941
00:46:38,198 --> 00:46:39,942
- Okay. Oh, God!
- No, it's not a sex vacation.
942
00:46:39,966 --> 00:46:41,711
I know, I know, I know, sorry.
It's just that, now that
943
00:46:41,735 --> 00:46:43,703
we said it, I can't
even really ignore it.
944
00:46:43,737 --> 00:46:45,247
- You want me to call and cancel?
- Uh-uh.
945
00:46:45,271 --> 00:46:46,549
- Uh-uh. No.
- I'll call and cancel.
946
00:46:46,573 --> 00:46:48,441
- Put the phone down. Stop.
- Excuse me.
947
00:46:48,475 --> 00:46:50,076
It's fine. This is
what we're gonna
948
00:46:50,110 --> 00:46:51,454
do, I'm going to
leave and we're gonna
949
00:46:51,478 --> 00:46:52,455
pretend like this
conversation never happened.
950
00:46:52,479 --> 00:46:53,680
Where are you going? What?
951
00:46:53,713 --> 00:46:55,458
- Your purse. Your beer?
- I'm moving.
952
00:46:55,482 --> 00:46:56,959
- You can have it.
- You're just leaving. Okay.
953
00:47:03,023 --> 00:47:07,694
♪ Trying to carry on
954
00:47:12,499 --> 00:47:17,771
♪ Time to radio life
955
00:47:23,143 --> 00:47:25,645
Oh, bird house.
956
00:47:25,679 --> 00:47:28,148
That's cute.
957
00:47:28,181 --> 00:47:31,484
♪ Burning inside out
958
00:47:31,518 --> 00:47:33,586
♪ Coming fast...
959
00:47:35,055 --> 00:47:37,090
Right.
960
00:47:37,123 --> 00:47:39,526
Welcome to The Lakeside Pines!
961
00:47:39,559 --> 00:47:41,695
- Hear that?
- What was that?
962
00:47:41,728 --> 00:47:45,765
- Oh! They're here.
- We're right here.
963
00:47:45,799 --> 00:47:47,500
Are we in the right
spot? We parked here?
964
00:47:51,404 --> 00:47:54,240
- That's firm.
- The bed, yeah. It's nice.
965
00:47:54,708 --> 00:47:55,709
Bed.
966
00:47:58,378 --> 00:47:59,989
Oh, Jesus, we're about
to scissor, aren't we?
967
00:48:00,013 --> 00:48:01,881
Okay, don't... Okay,
take a-take a breath.
968
00:48:01,915 --> 00:48:03,659
And then you're going to
want to be the little spoon.
969
00:48:03,683 --> 00:48:05,027
Well, what if I want
to be the little...
970
00:48:05,051 --> 00:48:06,562
- You're freaking out. Yeah.
- No, I'm not.
971
00:48:06,586 --> 00:48:08,064
- You're freaking out a little...
- No, I'm not.
972
00:48:08,088 --> 00:48:09,532
- Just a little bit.
- I'm not. You're freaking out.
973
00:48:09,556 --> 00:48:11,224
I'm not freaking out.
974
00:48:11,257 --> 00:48:12,759
What if it's bad?
975
00:48:12,792 --> 00:48:15,462
Okay, worst things have
happened to better people.
976
00:48:19,332 --> 00:48:20,700
You're my best friend.
977
00:48:20,734 --> 00:48:24,170
So, whatever does or
doesn't happen here...
978
00:48:24,204 --> 00:48:25,705
it won't change that.
979
00:48:25,739 --> 00:48:27,540
- Okay. Okay.
- It won't. Okay?
980
00:48:27,574 --> 00:48:29,242
Sex has destroyed
civilizations, I think
981
00:48:29,275 --> 00:48:30,553
it could take us
down if it wanted to.
982
00:48:30,577 --> 00:48:31,945
Well, you aren't Helen of Troy.
983
00:48:32,045 --> 00:48:35,047
You use that
line on all the girls?
984
00:48:35,048 --> 00:48:37,049
Only the ones that I like.
985
00:48:41,821 --> 00:48:44,391
♪ When I find
we're out of time ♪
986
00:48:44,424 --> 00:48:47,627
♪ Gather around on the floor
987
00:48:47,660 --> 00:48:51,431
♪ We're burning it inside out ♪
988
00:48:51,464 --> 00:48:54,134
♪ Seasonal
989
00:48:54,167 --> 00:48:56,603
♪ Wind singing now
990
00:49:01,107 --> 00:49:06,780
♪ You may hear us
let our head down ♪
991
00:49:06,813 --> 00:49:10,583
♪ We're burning inside out ♪
992
00:49:10,617 --> 00:49:13,253
♪ On the count to five
993
00:49:13,286 --> 00:49:16,256
♪ ...lying strong
994
00:49:23,029 --> 00:49:28,568
♪ Here we are
995
00:49:30,103 --> 00:49:34,274
♪ Turn Your radio
996
00:49:34,307 --> 00:49:37,610
♪ On
997
00:49:45,885 --> 00:49:47,487
- Whoo!
- Wow!
998
00:49:47,520 --> 00:49:50,290
- You are Helen of Troy.
- Thank you.
999
00:49:50,323 --> 00:49:52,625
- That was... yeah.
- Thank you.
1000
00:49:52,659 --> 00:49:56,863
All those years of field work
have made you quite a contender.
1001
00:49:56,896 --> 00:49:59,566
Sounds like you just used
a bunch of fancy words
1002
00:49:59,599 --> 00:50:02,502
to call me a slut in a nice way.
1003
00:50:02,535 --> 00:50:04,104
No, it's good. I
had a good time.
1004
00:50:04,137 --> 00:50:06,239
- Hm, yeah, me too.
- Yeah.
1005
00:50:06,272 --> 00:50:08,775
- You're strong and bendy.
- Yoga.
1006
00:50:08,808 --> 00:50:10,377
I wanna start doing that.
1007
00:50:10,410 --> 00:50:13,313
You were great, but I can send
you some videos if you want.
1008
00:50:13,346 --> 00:50:14,814
- Really? Yeah, send 'em.
- Yeah.
1009
00:50:14,848 --> 00:50:16,416
- Okay, I will.
- Okay.
1010
00:50:21,721 --> 00:50:23,890
- I'm hungry, you hungry?
- I'm hungry.
1011
00:50:23,923 --> 00:50:25,058
- Okay.
- Okay.
1012
00:50:25,091 --> 00:50:26,168
Let's get something to eat.
1013
00:50:26,192 --> 00:50:28,795
- We'll eat.
- Again.
1014
00:50:29,629 --> 00:50:33,133
- Oh, that was a good one.
- Thanks.
1015
00:50:33,166 --> 00:50:35,301
Basket's over
there. Yeah.
1016
00:50:35,335 --> 00:50:38,138
- You want to get it?
- You go get it.
1017
00:50:38,171 --> 00:50:39,205
Okay.
1018
00:50:40,340 --> 00:50:41,941
Jam?
1019
00:50:41,975 --> 00:50:43,910
No, actually, this is
a marmalade, not a jam.
1020
00:50:43,943 --> 00:50:44,811
Here, try it.
1021
00:50:44,844 --> 00:50:46,479
You almost stabbed
me in the eye.
1022
00:50:46,513 --> 00:50:48,915
But I didn't, and
that's what matters.
1023
00:50:48,948 --> 00:50:52,585
Oh, anyway, a jam's usually made
of crushed or chopped fruits,
1024
00:50:52,619 --> 00:50:54,921
sugar, pectin, lemon juice,
1025
00:50:54,954 --> 00:50:58,725
marmalades are made
with citrus fruits.
1026
00:50:58,758 --> 00:51:00,827
And pieces of peel.
Oh, God. Oh, stop it.
1027
00:51:00,860 --> 00:51:03,329
That is the most boring thing
I have ever heard in my life.
1028
00:51:03,363 --> 00:51:04,931
Just wait till we
get to compote.
1029
00:51:04,964 --> 00:51:06,709
Isn't that a movie with
Philip Seymour Hoffmann?
1030
00:51:06,733 --> 00:51:08,401
- That's Copote.
- Right.
1031
00:51:12,072 --> 00:51:13,073
Too much sugar.
1032
00:51:17,944 --> 00:51:18,912
What's that?
1033
00:51:27,253 --> 00:51:29,422
Don't fight me, don't fight.
1034
00:51:29,456 --> 00:51:30,657
Is there a fight coming?
1035
00:51:31,991 --> 00:51:33,536
Yeah, it depends on
the next ten seconds.
1036
00:51:33,560 --> 00:51:35,962
Okay. Lexa.
1037
00:51:35,995 --> 00:51:39,632
Um, I was gonna bring Taylor
here and then we broke up.
1038
00:51:39,666 --> 00:51:41,901
- And I forgot to cancel...
- Of course.
1039
00:51:41,935 --> 00:51:43,903
This was for Taylor. We
both hate stuff like this.
1040
00:51:43,937 --> 00:51:46,740
W-wait. Actually, no, actually
I did cancel, I tried to cancel.
1041
00:51:46,773 --> 00:51:49,509
Peter, I even asked you if it
was for her. I gave you the out.
1042
00:51:49,542 --> 00:51:51,244
Would you prefer, I
told you the truth?
1043
00:51:51,277 --> 00:51:53,279
Yes, no, I-I don't
know. We just,
1044
00:51:53,313 --> 00:51:54,948
we never lie to each other ever.
1045
00:51:54,981 --> 00:51:56,759
Really? So the real reason
you broke up with Luke
1046
00:51:56,783 --> 00:51:57,951
was 'cause of his big teeth?
1047
00:52:02,389 --> 00:52:04,758
If you had told me the truth,
it would've been weird.
1048
00:52:04,791 --> 00:52:06,268
But I still would've
wanted to come because
1049
00:52:06,292 --> 00:52:08,828
I would've been with you and
we always have fun together.
1050
00:52:08,862 --> 00:52:13,065
- But, this changes things.
- Okay, wait. Lexa, wait.
1051
00:52:13,066 --> 00:52:15,067
- Ooh, ooh, ooh! Do it with me.
- No.
1052
00:52:15,068 --> 00:52:16,746
Just one time. Looking
through the glass...
1053
00:52:16,770 --> 00:52:19,906
- Peter, stop.
- Ooh, ooh! Over things?
1054
00:52:19,939 --> 00:52:21,241
Your turn. Chime in. Please.
1055
00:52:21,274 --> 00:52:22,809
You can't just
sing the Jacob Song
1056
00:52:22,842 --> 00:52:24,210
and expect everything
to be better.
1057
00:52:25,478 --> 00:52:26,846
Not this time.
1058
00:52:30,083 --> 00:52:31,084
I feel gross.
1059
00:52:57,510 --> 00:52:59,145
Hey!
1060
00:52:59,179 --> 00:53:00,513
- Oh, hey.
- Hey.
1061
00:53:00,547 --> 00:53:04,484
- Came to get a paper clip. Yeah.
- Oh, cool. Nice.
1062
00:53:04,517 --> 00:53:06,051
Last week would've
been our anniversary.
1063
00:53:06,052 --> 00:53:08,221
- You know? Yeah.
- I know. Yeah. Yeah.
1064
00:53:08,254 --> 00:53:09,799
So, I know that things
are weird between us
1065
00:53:09,823 --> 00:53:11,400
but I was wondering if
you wanted to come over
1066
00:53:11,424 --> 00:53:13,593
for dinner Thursday?
1067
00:53:13,626 --> 00:53:15,338
That night that you
proposed, I said some things
1068
00:53:15,362 --> 00:53:16,730
that I shouldn't have and...
1069
00:53:16,763 --> 00:53:18,498
I-I just would
really like to talk.
1070
00:53:18,531 --> 00:53:22,202
- Because, I, I miss you.
- Yeah. Um, well, I gotta...
1071
00:53:22,235 --> 00:53:23,579
- I gotta get these to Dave.
- Mm-mm.
1072
00:53:23,603 --> 00:53:26,373
- 'Cause Dave said he needed...
- Yeah. Dave.
1073
00:53:26,406 --> 00:53:28,074
Oh, you're gonna do
it right now? Okay.
1074
00:53:28,108 --> 00:53:29,542
Yeah. Except, Dave's
the other way.
1075
00:53:29,576 --> 00:53:31,211
No, I know, I know,
I was just looking.
1076
00:53:31,244 --> 00:53:32,579
Okay.
1077
00:53:32,612 --> 00:53:35,448
Uh, Thursday, invitation's open.
1078
00:53:36,783 --> 00:53:40,820
Yeah, not for you.
No offense. Yeah.
1079
00:53:43,790 --> 00:53:44,791
Yeah.
1080
00:53:53,600 --> 00:53:55,235
Hey!
1081
00:53:55,268 --> 00:53:57,303
- Yeah?
- You're ready to go?
1082
00:53:58,805 --> 00:54:00,573
Doug and Ella? Dinner?
1083
00:54:00,607 --> 00:54:03,576
Oh God, yeah, I forgot.
Can you just make up a lie?
1084
00:54:03,610 --> 00:54:06,088
I don't want to deal with them
asking questions about our trip.
1085
00:54:06,112 --> 00:54:08,314
You're gonna make
me face them alone.
1086
00:54:08,348 --> 00:54:10,216
Seems like the least
you can do, yeah.
1087
00:54:10,250 --> 00:54:12,152
No, don't do this to me.
1088
00:54:12,185 --> 00:54:13,629
Ella's gonna figure out
that we got in a fight.
1089
00:54:13,653 --> 00:54:15,798
- She's gonna yell at me.
- She's a great friend that way.
1090
00:54:15,822 --> 00:54:17,533
And then Doug gonna drink
too many wine spritzers
1091
00:54:17,557 --> 00:54:19,626
and start crying about
how much he loves Blake.
1092
00:54:19,659 --> 00:54:23,062
Phew! That sounds
awful. God speed.
1093
00:54:24,831 --> 00:54:25,765
Lexa?
1094
00:54:27,200 --> 00:54:28,368
Please.
1095
00:54:29,536 --> 00:54:31,638
I'm just a poor boy.
1096
00:54:34,341 --> 00:54:37,210
Fine.
1097
00:54:37,243 --> 00:54:39,646
Give me like five
minutes to get dressed.
1098
00:54:39,679 --> 00:54:40,680
Okay.
1099
00:54:49,189 --> 00:54:51,658
Welcome to Casa de
Doug y Ella y Blake!
1100
00:54:51,691 --> 00:54:53,960
- Wow, take it down a notch.
- What? It's Fiesta Night.
1101
00:54:53,993 --> 00:54:56,996
I made fiesta fajitas.
Come on, feel the music.
1102
00:54:57,097 --> 00:54:59,699
- Okay, all right.
- Would you give us a minute?
1103
00:54:59,733 --> 00:55:02,102
Oh!
1104
00:55:02,135 --> 00:55:03,670
- What're you doing?
- Let's make up.
1105
00:55:03,703 --> 00:55:06,072
I'm over this fight. Yeah. I
thought about it and what you
1106
00:55:06,106 --> 00:55:07,683
did wasn't that bad, plus,
I think we're gonna need
1107
00:55:07,707 --> 00:55:09,041
each other to get through
this Fiesta night.
1108
00:55:09,042 --> 00:55:10,844
You know, the
door isn't sound proof.
1109
00:55:10,877 --> 00:55:12,521
If we're fighting, they're
gonna pick up on it.
1110
00:55:12,545 --> 00:55:14,347
It's gonna make
this even weirder.
1111
00:55:14,381 --> 00:55:16,048
- Okay, um...
- Super thin.
1112
00:55:16,049 --> 00:55:17,717
It's definitely gonna get weird.
1113
00:55:17,751 --> 00:55:19,328
Okay, so you wanna just
skip to the end where
1114
00:55:19,352 --> 00:55:20,854
we make up like we always do?
1115
00:55:20,887 --> 00:55:22,727
Yeah, if that's how you
wanna look at it, sure.
1116
00:55:22,756 --> 00:55:25,392
- But it feels so easy.
- Take the win, Lambida.
1117
00:55:27,560 --> 00:55:28,528
- Ole.
- Hey.
1118
00:55:28,561 --> 00:55:31,598
- Hi!
- Hi, wow!
1119
00:55:31,631 --> 00:55:33,733
- Did you hear us fighting?
- I heard everything.
1120
00:55:33,767 --> 00:55:34,777
- Thank you.
- You doing okay?
1121
00:55:34,801 --> 00:55:36,169
Yeah. Hi.
1122
00:55:36,202 --> 00:55:37,203
Welcome.
1123
00:55:37,237 --> 00:55:38,972
I was kidding.
1124
00:55:39,072 --> 00:55:41,374
No, it's so horrible, they
like suck up your blood,
1125
00:55:41,408 --> 00:55:42,509
you're their food source.
1126
00:55:42,542 --> 00:55:44,277
Argh! I'm gotta throw up.
1127
00:55:44,310 --> 00:55:45,879
This was delicious
Doug, thank you.
1128
00:55:45,912 --> 00:55:48,214
Taylor gave us the
recipe actually, sorry.
1129
00:55:48,248 --> 00:55:49,725
Oh, that's okay, you
can say her name.
1130
00:55:49,749 --> 00:55:52,652
Yeah. That's not awkward at all.
1131
00:55:52,686 --> 00:55:54,454
- Don't make that noise.
- What?
1132
00:55:54,487 --> 00:55:56,289
That noise. That's
gross, we have guests.
1133
00:55:56,322 --> 00:55:57,362
- I don't care.
- I'm fine.
1134
00:55:57,390 --> 00:55:58,892
See, they don't care.
1135
00:55:58,925 --> 00:56:00,736
I think you're being polite
because it's disgusting.
1136
00:56:00,760 --> 00:56:03,763
I think, they all remember you
slipping on your own vomit.
1137
00:56:03,797 --> 00:56:05,237
- I remember that.
- I remember that.
1138
00:56:05,265 --> 00:56:06,599
And, it doesn't matter.
1139
00:56:07,500 --> 00:56:09,302
What? Gosh, does it count?
1140
00:56:09,336 --> 00:56:11,071
- Yes, it does.
- Those are tense.
1141
00:56:11,104 --> 00:56:13,573
- Mm-hm.
- Hm.
1142
00:56:13,606 --> 00:56:15,475
- Are you...
- Are you, what?
1143
00:56:15,508 --> 00:56:19,679
- In AA?
- No. Why would you ask that?
1144
00:56:19,713 --> 00:56:23,783
- You're pregnant.
- Oh! No, um...
1145
00:56:23,817 --> 00:56:26,051
- I was going to some meetings.
- You're pregnant.
1146
00:56:26,052 --> 00:56:28,054
- Because you stopped drinking.
- I'm not pregnant.
1147
00:56:28,088 --> 00:56:29,932
Wait a minute, I haven't
seen you smoke in weeks.
1148
00:56:29,956 --> 00:56:31,958
- You were smoking?
- You're in the family way.
1149
00:56:32,058 --> 00:56:33,793
- With child.
- I had to give up my cigars.
1150
00:56:33,827 --> 00:56:35,528
And this whole time
you've been smoking?
1151
00:56:35,562 --> 00:56:37,597
Hey, okay. First of all,
1152
00:56:37,630 --> 00:56:39,165
I don't big, not
even metaphorically.
1153
00:56:39,199 --> 00:56:40,734
- I know that.
- Second of all.
1154
00:56:40,767 --> 00:56:42,969
When you smoke cigars
you smell like my father.
1155
00:56:43,069 --> 00:56:45,772
I was starting to have
very complicated dreams.
1156
00:56:45,805 --> 00:56:48,073
And third of all,
I am not pregnant.
1157
00:56:48,074 --> 00:56:50,276
- Hm.
- Mm. Mm-hm.
1158
00:56:50,310 --> 00:56:52,078
- Hm.
- Hm. Ahem!
1159
00:56:54,280 --> 00:56:56,216
- She's pregnant!
- Doug!
1160
00:56:56,249 --> 00:56:57,484
- I'm sorry. What?
- Oh, God!
1161
00:56:57,517 --> 00:56:59,619
I'm sorry. I had to
tell. I'm so excited.
1162
00:56:59,652 --> 00:57:04,824
- Yaay! Congratulations.
- Jesus, um, I'm at ten weeks.
1163
00:57:04,858 --> 00:57:06,760
We just had agreed
not to tell anyone
1164
00:57:06,793 --> 00:57:09,129
because we've had some
false starts, so...
1165
00:57:09,162 --> 00:57:10,063
Yeah.
1166
00:57:11,731 --> 00:57:14,067
- And we're moving to suburbs.
- Damnit, Doug.
1167
00:57:14,100 --> 00:57:15,735
I told you, I'm bursting.
1168
00:57:15,769 --> 00:57:17,137
- Wow!
- Yeah!
1169
00:57:17,170 --> 00:57:19,105
Good schools, the kids
will have a backyard...
1170
00:57:19,139 --> 00:57:20,783
I guess they know
what the suburbs are.
1171
00:57:20,807 --> 00:57:22,451
But I thought you guys
were such city people.
1172
00:57:22,475 --> 00:57:24,043
Where're you
thinking? Like, Evanston?
1173
00:57:24,044 --> 00:57:26,045
Well, we've just put an
offer on a place in Oak Park.
1174
00:57:26,046 --> 00:57:28,848
- Oak Park, that's on my list.
- Your "list?"
1175
00:57:28,882 --> 00:57:30,583
I mean, it just
makes sense. Right?
1176
00:57:30,617 --> 00:57:32,652
Quick commute for work,
the kids will have fun.
1177
00:57:32,686 --> 00:57:36,356
We're going up.
Moving to the suburbs!
1178
00:57:36,389 --> 00:57:39,726
- Nice.
- Yes, really nice.
1179
00:57:41,361 --> 00:57:42,529
And you're excited?
1180
00:57:44,531 --> 00:57:46,733
- Yes, I'm excited.
- Yes!
1181
00:57:46,766 --> 00:57:49,202
I'll drink to that. Cheers.
1182
00:57:49,235 --> 00:57:53,073
- Congratulations, guys.
- Thank you, thank you.
1183
00:57:53,106 --> 00:57:55,241
So happy for you guys.
1184
00:57:55,275 --> 00:57:57,844
Please drink my
wine. Happy for you.
1185
00:57:57,877 --> 00:57:59,488
I could cry right
now. But I'm not gonna.
1186
00:57:59,512 --> 00:58:00,890
You look
little jealous today.
1187
00:58:00,914 --> 00:58:04,651
Please don't. You
haven't even had dessert yet.
1188
00:58:15,095 --> 00:58:19,733
- I'm too big a screw up for you.
- You are not a screw up.
1189
00:58:19,766 --> 00:58:21,644
A baby called me a screw up at
the supermarket the other...
1190
00:58:21,668 --> 00:58:23,570
A baby did not call
you a screw up.
1191
00:58:23,603 --> 00:58:25,872
- He did. With his eyes.
- You're a lunatic.
1192
00:58:25,905 --> 00:58:27,774
- But you aren't a screw up.
- I am.
1193
00:58:27,807 --> 00:58:29,618
Okay, if you're a screw
up, then I'm a screw up.
1194
00:58:29,642 --> 00:58:32,112
- That's adorable.
- I pee in the shower.
1195
00:58:32,145 --> 00:58:36,383
- Not sometimes, every day.
- That's all you got?
1196
00:58:36,416 --> 00:58:39,386
Sometimes I pee in the shower
when I'm not taking a shower.
1197
00:58:39,419 --> 00:58:41,721
Why? It's really weird.
1198
00:58:41,755 --> 00:58:43,566
I lost my neighbor's cat
and instead of telling him,
1199
00:58:43,590 --> 00:58:45,658
I replaced it with a
cat from the shelter.
1200
00:58:48,428 --> 00:58:50,930
I forgot to pay my bills,
1201
00:58:50,964 --> 00:58:53,500
so I didn't have hot water
or power for three weeks.
1202
00:58:53,533 --> 00:58:55,935
I sometimes go to soup kitchens
just to watch homeless people
1203
00:58:55,969 --> 00:58:57,470
and feel better about myself.
1204
00:58:57,504 --> 00:59:00,073
Well, you know what?
You're a bad person.
1205
00:59:00,106 --> 00:59:02,342
But you're not a screw up.
1206
00:59:02,375 --> 00:59:03,677
Who cares?
1207
00:59:03,710 --> 00:59:06,713
You should. You want
to move to the suburbs.
1208
00:59:08,014 --> 00:59:10,617
- Yeah, one day.
- Yeah. With a wife and kids...
1209
00:59:10,650 --> 00:59:12,886
Well, I don't need the
picket fence thing.
1210
00:59:12,919 --> 00:59:14,463
- But, yeah, that's the idea.
- Well, you can't do that.
1211
00:59:14,487 --> 00:59:16,766
With someone who's life is a
mess. I mean, I guess you could,
1212
00:59:16,790 --> 00:59:18,501
like my mom did. But
look how that turned out.
1213
00:59:18,525 --> 00:59:20,593
You're not a mess.
You turned out great.
1214
00:59:20,627 --> 00:59:21,928
What're you talking about?
1215
00:59:25,031 --> 00:59:28,568
I didn't break up with
Luke because of his teeth.
1216
00:59:28,601 --> 00:59:31,838
I actually really
loved his beaver teeth.
1217
00:59:31,871 --> 00:59:34,039
But he started
bringing up the future.
1218
00:59:34,040 --> 00:59:38,912
The wife and the kids, and I
felt myself pushing him away.
1219
00:59:38,945 --> 00:59:41,448
And then, Luke
met Kimberly Mint.
1220
00:59:41,481 --> 00:59:42,649
Kimberly's are bitches.
1221
00:59:42,682 --> 00:59:46,786
Maybe, but she was
ready for all that.
1222
00:59:46,820 --> 00:59:48,621
And Luke fell in love
with her instead.
1223
00:59:48,655 --> 00:59:52,826
And when that
happened, I fell apart.
1224
00:59:52,859 --> 00:59:55,528
I drank too much, and
I smoked too much.
1225
00:59:55,562 --> 00:59:58,531
And, I messed up at
work and got fired.
1226
00:59:58,565 --> 00:59:59,965
- The sandwich place?
- Yeah.
1227
01:00:00,000 --> 01:00:02,002
- Free sandwiches?
- Yeah.
1228
01:00:02,035 --> 01:00:03,379
And then my landlord
threatened to evict me
1229
01:00:03,403 --> 01:00:05,138
so I moved back here.
1230
01:00:07,807 --> 01:00:10,377
You're ready for
something serious.
1231
01:00:10,410 --> 01:00:12,912
And that's great.
1232
01:00:12,946 --> 01:00:15,982
But I don't know if I'm ever
gonna be a Kimberly Mint.
1233
01:00:33,266 --> 01:00:37,470
♪ I love thunder
1234
01:00:40,006 --> 01:00:41,283
Why're you looking
at me like that?
1235
01:00:41,307 --> 01:00:43,009
- Try it.
- Well, now, I don't want to.
1236
01:00:43,043 --> 01:00:45,812
- Just try it.
- You try it.
1237
01:00:45,845 --> 01:00:47,347
I didn't do anything
weird to it.
1238
01:00:51,051 --> 01:00:52,652
I don't know.
1239
01:00:52,686 --> 01:00:54,263
You're seriously going to ruin
this right now, aren't you?
1240
01:00:54,287 --> 01:00:55,598
Ruin what? Your
assassination attempt?
1241
01:00:55,622 --> 01:00:57,390
It's only an assassination
1242
01:00:57,424 --> 01:00:59,459
attempt if you're of
international significance.
1243
01:00:59,492 --> 01:01:01,270
But you don't denying
you're trying to kill me?
1244
01:01:01,294 --> 01:01:04,164
It's eggplant parmigiana,
Peter. Eggplant.
1245
01:01:04,197 --> 01:01:07,334
- Oh! So, I'm the butthole.
- Mm-hm. Yeah.
1246
01:01:10,704 --> 01:01:11,871
Hm.
1247
01:01:13,073 --> 01:01:14,908
- It's good.
- You hate it.
1248
01:01:14,941 --> 01:01:16,676
I want to like it,
but it's not me.
1249
01:01:16,710 --> 01:01:19,079
I went to the dark side
and I can't come back.
1250
01:01:19,112 --> 01:01:21,114
- You're unbelievable.
- Actually, yeah, no.
1251
01:01:21,147 --> 01:01:23,516
The tastes are kicking in
at the end and it's now
1252
01:01:23,550 --> 01:01:25,518
forming a beautiful
thing that you've done.
1253
01:01:25,552 --> 01:01:27,620
Thank you, I'm gonna
keep eating it, watch.
1254
01:01:27,654 --> 01:01:29,889
Watch this. Ready? Hm!
1255
01:01:29,923 --> 01:01:31,300
When I said "No" to
your proposal, I said
1256
01:01:31,324 --> 01:01:34,494
it was because you weren't
ready but I wasn't ready.
1257
01:01:34,527 --> 01:01:36,007
You-you weren't who
I was expecting to
1258
01:01:36,096 --> 01:01:37,797
end up with, you
think farts are funny.
1259
01:01:37,831 --> 01:01:40,099
Well, objectively they
are. Like scientifically.
1260
01:01:40,100 --> 01:01:41,243
You didn't have
health insurance until
1261
01:01:41,267 --> 01:01:42,578
I gave it to you
for your birthday.
1262
01:01:42,602 --> 01:01:44,504
You're a man-child, it
freaked me out and...
1263
01:01:44,537 --> 01:01:46,582
Wait, did you just invite me
over to insult my personality?
1264
01:01:46,606 --> 01:01:49,109
I invited you over to
ask you to marry me.
1265
01:01:50,643 --> 01:01:51,911
What?
1266
01:01:53,580 --> 01:01:56,649
- Oh, my God! Are you dying?
- Why would I be dying?
1267
01:01:56,683 --> 01:01:58,561
I don't know. Why would
you ask me to marry you?
1268
01:01:58,585 --> 01:02:00,787
- You annoy the shit out of me.
- Okay.
1269
01:02:00,820 --> 01:02:03,957
And, there are so many things
that, that drive me crazy
1270
01:02:04,057 --> 01:02:05,134
about you, like, you-you leave
1271
01:02:05,158 --> 01:02:07,527
your dirty socks
in my living room.
1272
01:02:07,560 --> 01:02:10,062
And-and you put the empty
milk carton back in the fridge
1273
01:02:10,063 --> 01:02:11,640
instead of throwing it
out, and you've made
1274
01:02:11,664 --> 01:02:14,066
the 11 o'clock news
into a drinking game,
1275
01:02:14,067 --> 01:02:16,670
for God's sake but
for some stupid reason
1276
01:02:16,703 --> 01:02:18,381
you're the first person I
think about in the morning,
1277
01:02:18,405 --> 01:02:20,373
and the last person I
think about at night.
1278
01:02:20,407 --> 01:02:22,075
I'm just a little bit confused
1279
01:02:22,108 --> 01:02:23,943
because 90 percent
of that was insult.
1280
01:02:23,977 --> 01:02:25,378
And a ten percent stalker.
1281
01:02:25,412 --> 01:02:27,147
Well, I love you so
much I can look past
1282
01:02:27,180 --> 01:02:29,516
all of your glaring flaws.
1283
01:02:29,549 --> 01:02:31,584
Thank you.
1284
01:02:31,618 --> 01:02:33,085
You're the person that
I can't live without
1285
01:02:33,086 --> 01:02:35,321
that I don't want
to live without.
1286
01:02:35,355 --> 01:02:37,991
- You broke up with me, Taylor.
- I know.
1287
01:02:38,091 --> 01:02:39,993
I just, I-I was
nervous that, that you
1288
01:02:40,093 --> 01:02:41,671
and I could never have
what you and Lexa have.
1289
01:02:41,695 --> 01:02:43,530
I broke up with you
because I was scared
1290
01:02:43,563 --> 01:02:45,932
and dumb, not because
I stopped loving you.
1291
01:02:47,100 --> 01:02:48,702
I never stopped
loving you either.
1292
01:02:50,136 --> 01:02:51,304
Then let's get married.
1293
01:02:52,806 --> 01:02:54,106
I can't.
1294
01:02:54,107 --> 01:02:55,442
Why? Give me one
good reason why.
1295
01:02:57,811 --> 01:02:59,846
I'm dating Lexa.
1296
01:02:59,879 --> 01:03:02,482
Oh! That's a good reason.
1297
01:03:03,650 --> 01:03:06,720
- Yeah.
- Is it serious?
1298
01:03:06,753 --> 01:03:09,689
I don't know, it's complicated,
it's been a month only but...
1299
01:03:13,727 --> 01:03:16,963
Yeah, I don't, I don't know
what else to say, Taylor.
1300
01:03:18,798 --> 01:03:20,066
Say you'll marry me.
1301
01:03:22,469 --> 01:03:25,071
♪ In the night...
1302
01:03:30,477 --> 01:03:31,478
Lexa?
1303
01:03:32,212 --> 01:03:33,380
I need to talk to you.
1304
01:03:35,715 --> 01:03:36,716
Lexa?
1305
01:03:36,750 --> 01:03:39,419
♪ Oh
1306
01:03:39,452 --> 01:03:42,322
♪ And the night comes still
1307
01:03:42,355 --> 01:03:46,126
♪ Seeing all
1308
01:03:46,159 --> 01:03:52,298
♪ And the night comes our way
1309
01:03:53,667 --> 01:03:55,135
♪ Wide awake
1310
01:03:59,372 --> 01:04:02,709
♪ The night comes down...
1311
01:04:14,254 --> 01:04:16,156
Can you just... I don't know.
1312
01:04:16,189 --> 01:04:18,458
Call her a cab to
go somewhere else?
1313
01:04:18,491 --> 01:04:20,427
We can't kick her out.
1314
01:04:20,460 --> 01:04:22,471
I'm not saying to
kick her out. I'm just saying
1315
01:04:22,495 --> 01:04:25,064
at a certain point,
you're too old to be
1316
01:04:25,065 --> 01:04:27,167
crashing at people's places.
1317
01:04:27,200 --> 01:04:28,868
She's going through
a really rough time.
1318
01:04:28,902 --> 01:04:30,837
We're all going through
a rough time, sweetie.
1319
01:04:30,870 --> 01:04:34,507
That's literally what being
an adult is, a rough time.
1320
01:04:34,541 --> 01:04:38,378
Jeez! When did you
become so hard-hearted?
1321
01:04:38,411 --> 01:04:41,414
I just want my living
room, is that so wrong?
1322
01:04:42,782 --> 01:04:43,783
She's our friend.
1323
01:04:45,251 --> 01:04:47,320
You ever wonder if we
met some of the people
1324
01:04:47,354 --> 01:04:48,722
we're friends with now,
1325
01:04:48,755 --> 01:04:50,357
we'd still want to
be friends with them?
1326
01:04:57,530 --> 01:05:01,067
- Journal about it. Okay.
- Oh, I will.
1327
01:05:03,570 --> 01:05:07,173
- Wife was rude.
- Wife is hot as shit.
1328
01:05:10,777 --> 01:05:13,113
Aren't you old to-old
to be a babysitter?
1329
01:05:13,146 --> 01:05:16,416
- No.
- My last babysitter was 14.
1330
01:05:16,449 --> 01:05:18,818
Oh, so your parents made
two bad decisions I see.
1331
01:05:18,852 --> 01:05:22,489
Yeah, well, Lexa's my babysitter
for now but she also has an app.
1332
01:05:22,522 --> 01:05:25,091
- So...
- Yeah. That's right.
1333
01:05:27,427 --> 01:05:30,497
So do you still have to
live with your parents?
1334
01:05:33,867 --> 01:05:37,270
Listen. Being an adult is hard.
1335
01:05:37,303 --> 01:05:38,781
Harder than people
tell you, and sometimes
1336
01:05:38,805 --> 01:05:40,449
your plans don't work
out and your whole life
1337
01:05:40,473 --> 01:05:42,442
goes to hell and the
worst part about it is
1338
01:05:42,475 --> 01:05:44,086
nobody is even surprised
because you're just fulfilling
1339
01:05:44,110 --> 01:05:46,680
this little prophecy that they
had in their head for you.
1340
01:05:46,713 --> 01:05:49,883
So, basically everything
about being an adult sucks.
1341
01:05:52,318 --> 01:05:54,554
Shit! I'm sorry.
1342
01:05:54,587 --> 01:05:59,259
- Please, don't do that. Um...
- Being an adult sucks?
1343
01:05:59,292 --> 01:06:01,026
Lexa, fix it, fix it, fix it!
1344
01:06:01,027 --> 01:06:05,265
It's just gonna suck for a
long time and then you die?
1345
01:06:05,298 --> 01:06:07,934
- That's it?
- No! No, no, no. No, no.
1346
01:06:08,034 --> 01:06:09,469
That's not what's gonna happen.
1347
01:06:09,502 --> 01:06:11,805
You seem like a great kid
with rich enough parents
1348
01:06:11,838 --> 01:06:13,282
so, you're probably
gonna be totally fine
1349
01:06:13,306 --> 01:06:15,040
even if you have a
run for a few years,
1350
01:06:15,041 --> 01:06:16,619
it's gonna be cool,
you're gonna be cool.
1351
01:06:16,643 --> 01:06:18,878
So, just relax.
1352
01:06:18,912 --> 01:06:20,847
And here, have a string cheese.
1353
01:06:20,880 --> 01:06:22,882
I'm not supposed to have dairy.
1354
01:06:22,916 --> 01:06:24,184
I won't tell if you don't.
1355
01:06:27,620 --> 01:06:29,456
Thank you.
1356
01:06:29,489 --> 01:06:32,859
Okay, listen, you
guys. You're great.
1357
01:06:32,892 --> 01:06:34,928
And, I'm a screw-up.
1358
01:06:34,961 --> 01:06:36,605
You guys don't have
anything to worry about.
1359
01:06:36,629 --> 01:06:39,232
- Oh, my God! Stop.
- What?
1360
01:06:39,265 --> 01:06:42,535
Your biggest problem is
you. You're so mopey.
1361
01:06:42,569 --> 01:06:46,506
But your life is pretty
good. You kind of have a job,
1362
01:06:46,539 --> 01:06:49,743
you get to hang out with me all
day which is obviously sick.
1363
01:06:49,776 --> 01:06:52,879
You have an app which
could totally fail,
1364
01:06:52,912 --> 01:06:55,181
but at least you're
trying to do something.
1365
01:06:55,215 --> 01:06:56,616
Most adults don't even try.
1366
01:06:56,649 --> 01:07:00,520
They settle down and get
a 9 to 5, like my dad.
1367
01:07:00,553 --> 01:07:01,788
- Your dad's great.
- No shit.
1368
01:07:01,821 --> 01:07:04,491
He's the best, but
he's not brave.
1369
01:07:07,594 --> 01:07:10,296
Ugh, all this motivational
speaking made me tired
1370
01:07:10,330 --> 01:07:12,465
and hungry, I'm gonna
take a snack break.
1371
01:07:16,870 --> 01:07:17,937
Olivia?
1372
01:07:52,338 --> 01:07:54,540
Hey, Lex. I wanted
to talk to you in person
1373
01:07:54,573 --> 01:07:56,542
but I think you're avoiding me.
1374
01:07:56,575 --> 01:07:59,912
Which I totally understand.
1375
01:08:00,012 --> 01:08:04,917
But um, Taylor asked
me to marry her.
1376
01:08:05,017 --> 01:08:09,121
And, I think I might say yes.
1377
01:08:09,154 --> 01:08:13,058
Um, I know, it's awkward
over a voice message,
1378
01:08:13,092 --> 01:08:16,128
but I don't know how
to get a hold of you.
1379
01:08:16,161 --> 01:08:19,098
Uh, so, I don't know
what else to say.
1380
01:08:19,131 --> 01:08:23,902
But I-I hope you are
doing good, uh, yeah.
1381
01:08:23,936 --> 01:08:25,104
Take care.
1382
01:08:36,582 --> 01:08:38,484
Hey, how's it going?
1383
01:08:38,517 --> 01:08:41,453
- What?
- You like music?
1384
01:08:41,487 --> 01:08:43,155
- What?
- Music?
1385
01:08:43,188 --> 01:08:44,590
- This music?
- Yeah.
1386
01:08:44,623 --> 01:08:47,593
- My ears are bleeding.
- I know. It's great.
1387
01:09:10,015 --> 01:09:11,015
Whoo!
1388
01:09:13,786 --> 01:09:16,121
- Oh!
- Oh, that was new.
1389
01:09:16,155 --> 01:09:18,724
- Good new? Yeah?
- Yeah. Like, great! Great!
1390
01:09:20,192 --> 01:09:22,528
Where'd you learn that?
1391
01:09:22,561 --> 01:09:26,732
- Hm, um...
- Right. Mm-hm. Yeah, yeah.
1392
01:09:26,765 --> 01:09:28,667
- I'm gonna shower.
- Mm-hm.
1393
01:09:36,675 --> 01:09:37,643
Oh, my God!
1394
01:09:45,384 --> 01:09:50,122
Pete, so like... what
was it like dating her?
1395
01:09:50,155 --> 01:09:51,724
Peter? I know you can hear me.
1396
01:09:51,757 --> 01:09:55,761
This is a trap. This
whole conversation is a trap.
1397
01:09:55,794 --> 01:09:57,663
- It's a simple question.
- Okay.
1398
01:09:57,696 --> 01:10:00,632
I-I'm not the bad guy here.
I played by the rules.
1399
01:10:00,666 --> 01:10:02,101
You broke up with me.
1400
01:10:02,134 --> 01:10:04,803
I didn't tell you to sleep
with your best friend!
1401
01:10:04,837 --> 01:10:06,939
I know that you're hurt
right now but I did not
1402
01:10:06,972 --> 01:10:08,273
cheat on you, I was depressed
1403
01:10:08,307 --> 01:10:09,784
and I was looking for
someone to feel better.
1404
01:10:09,808 --> 01:10:12,144
- So wait, it was a rebound?
- Yes. No, a 100 percent.
1405
01:10:12,177 --> 01:10:14,113
It was a mistake. She's
gasoline, I'm a match.
1406
01:10:14,146 --> 01:10:15,948
You're the person
I'm meant to be with.
1407
01:10:15,981 --> 01:10:18,150
And it's over?
1408
01:10:18,183 --> 01:10:20,252
It's complicated.
I'll, I'll fix...
1409
01:10:20,285 --> 01:10:22,821
You didn't fix it already?
Like, what does that mean?
1410
01:10:22,855 --> 01:10:25,758
And why is your junk
covered? What are you doing?
1411
01:10:25,791 --> 01:10:27,226
'Cause this is a
hostile situation.
1412
01:10:27,259 --> 01:10:30,562
"Hostile?" It's not
hostile, Peter. I love you.
1413
01:10:30,596 --> 01:10:34,667
I'm in no hostility towards
him. He's my... I love him.
1414
01:10:34,700 --> 01:10:36,168
- I deserve him.
- You deserve it.
1415
01:10:36,201 --> 01:10:38,437
I deserve to see
him at all times.
1416
01:10:38,470 --> 01:10:39,405
Yes, you do.
1417
01:10:40,339 --> 01:10:41,273
Come on.
1418
01:10:43,442 --> 01:10:46,078
Okay, don't-don't pee
in the shower, please.
1419
01:10:46,111 --> 01:10:47,279
Huh?
1420
01:10:54,586 --> 01:10:55,554
How have you been?
1421
01:10:56,789 --> 01:10:58,624
I slept with a kid named River.
1422
01:10:59,525 --> 01:11:00,659
- No.
- Yep.
1423
01:11:00,693 --> 01:11:02,261
I screwed a River,
you nailed a Pond.
1424
01:11:02,294 --> 01:11:04,630
Her name was Lake.
1425
01:11:04,663 --> 01:11:07,099
Oh, I saw your app in the
app store. It's really great.
1426
01:11:07,132 --> 01:11:08,967
Oh, were you one
of the nine people
1427
01:11:09,068 --> 01:11:10,336
that have downloaded it so far?
1428
01:11:10,369 --> 01:11:13,071
- Well, these things take time.
- Yeah, I tried.
1429
01:11:13,072 --> 01:11:14,473
There's something
to that, right?
1430
01:11:14,506 --> 01:11:16,742
Exactly. Yeah. You should
be proud of yourself.
1431
01:11:16,775 --> 01:11:18,444
- I am.
- Good.
1432
01:11:24,149 --> 01:11:26,552
Can we not do this
anymore? This sucks.
1433
01:11:26,585 --> 01:11:28,954
- Can we just go back to normal?
- That's not that easy.
1434
01:11:28,987 --> 01:11:31,256
Yes, it is. We agreed that
if dating didn't work out,
1435
01:11:31,290 --> 01:11:32,334
we would go back
to being friends
1436
01:11:32,358 --> 01:11:33,859
just like nothing had changed.
1437
01:11:33,892 --> 01:11:36,595
- Things did change.
- Why? Because we had sex?
1438
01:11:36,628 --> 01:11:38,163
No, because I'm engaged.
1439
01:11:38,197 --> 01:11:41,133
- Bro's before hoes. Yes, I am.
- You're not my bro.
1440
01:11:41,166 --> 01:11:43,002
I don't sleep with
my other bro's.
1441
01:11:44,203 --> 01:11:45,380
So this is because we had sex.
1442
01:11:45,404 --> 01:11:48,374
No, it's because
I'm getting married
1443
01:11:48,407 --> 01:11:52,011
and I can't put our friendship
above everything else anymore.
1444
01:11:52,978 --> 01:11:55,147
I'm not asking you to do that.
1445
01:11:55,180 --> 01:11:57,483
I can't hurt Taylor anymore.
1446
01:11:57,516 --> 01:11:59,451
I'm not asking you
to do that either.
1447
01:12:00,853 --> 01:12:03,054
I think we just need
to take some space.
1448
01:12:03,055 --> 01:12:05,500
How much space do you need? We
already haven't spoken in weeks.
1449
01:12:05,524 --> 01:12:08,660
Well, as much as it takes
to make her feel okay.
1450
01:12:08,694 --> 01:12:11,062
Wait, are, are you
friend-dumping me right now?
1451
01:12:11,063 --> 01:12:14,065
I wish there was another way,
but I-I-I just can't see it.
1452
01:12:14,066 --> 01:12:17,403
Okay, so not only can we not
go back to being best friends
1453
01:12:17,436 --> 01:12:20,072
like you agreed we would, but
we can't be friends at all?
1454
01:12:22,074 --> 01:12:23,342
I don't know what else to say.
1455
01:12:28,347 --> 01:12:29,815
I want to kill you right now.
1456
01:12:33,218 --> 01:12:35,120
How? By tying me to two horse
1457
01:12:35,154 --> 01:12:36,689
drawn carts and
having them run...
1458
01:12:36,722 --> 01:12:37,723
Oh, Lex!
1459
01:12:54,873 --> 01:12:57,976
Okay, um, these...
Your butt looks
1460
01:12:58,010 --> 01:13:00,044
really good in this.
1461
01:13:00,045 --> 01:13:01,914
- Keep?
- Yes.
1462
01:13:03,315 --> 01:13:06,485
- Are you okay?
- Yeah. Totally.
1463
01:13:06,518 --> 01:13:08,287
You excited about tonight?
1464
01:13:08,320 --> 01:13:10,356
Not really, you know.
1465
01:13:10,389 --> 01:13:12,624
Bachelorettes are a
rite of passage, right?
1466
01:13:12,658 --> 01:13:15,327
- I suppose.
- What are you boys doing?
1467
01:13:15,361 --> 01:13:18,197
Oh. Well, if there
is a God, nothing.
1468
01:13:18,230 --> 01:13:19,798
- Keep box.
- Yes.
1469
01:13:19,832 --> 01:13:23,202
I just want to get a giant
family size box of White Castle.
1470
01:13:23,235 --> 01:13:25,547
You know what women think? Let
me tell you what women think.
1471
01:13:25,571 --> 01:13:27,071
Yeah, I love that.
1472
01:13:27,072 --> 01:13:30,075
Women think that men on
their final nights of freedom
1473
01:13:30,109 --> 01:13:31,610
they just want
strippers and beer
1474
01:13:31,643 --> 01:13:34,613
but really, I just want
a place to fart endlessly
1475
01:13:34,646 --> 01:13:36,849
into the sunset without
anybody knowing.
1476
01:13:36,882 --> 01:13:39,184
- They say romance is dead but...
- Nope.
1477
01:13:39,218 --> 01:13:41,854
- Proved me wrong.
- Not with me.
1478
01:13:41,887 --> 01:13:43,722
Anyway. Should I
keep this clock?
1479
01:13:45,090 --> 01:13:46,258
Yeah.
1480
01:13:48,427 --> 01:13:50,562
- Yeah.
- And...
1481
01:13:50,596 --> 01:13:53,097
Let's start with these ones.
1482
01:13:53,098 --> 01:13:54,233
Oh, I need tape.
1483
01:13:55,300 --> 01:13:59,571
- Is she coming today?
- No. No.
1484
01:13:59,605 --> 01:14:01,440
I ended it with
her platonically.
1485
01:14:02,474 --> 01:14:04,677
Oh. You didn't have to do that.
1486
01:14:04,710 --> 01:14:07,880
We are starting a new
chapter in our life.
1487
01:14:07,913 --> 01:14:11,550
And when we are
together, not good.
1488
01:14:11,583 --> 01:14:14,219
I don't want anything to
jeopardize what we have.
1489
01:14:14,253 --> 01:14:16,288
- I love you.
- I love you too.
1490
01:14:17,690 --> 01:14:20,292
- I need tape. Okay.
- Then get tape.
1491
01:14:44,083 --> 01:14:45,384
Lexa!
1492
01:14:47,386 --> 01:14:52,091
Lexa! Lexa! I know
you're in there.
1493
01:14:52,124 --> 01:14:53,826
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
1494
01:14:56,128 --> 01:14:58,097
Ta-da!
1495
01:14:58,130 --> 01:14:59,531
I was at my bachelorette party.
1496
01:15:00,499 --> 01:15:02,267
- You don't say.
- Yeah.
1497
01:15:05,170 --> 01:15:06,739
What is that? What are you...
1498
01:15:11,543 --> 01:15:13,746
- Oh!
- I think I did it.
1499
01:15:13,779 --> 01:15:15,914
- Wow!
- I can't marry Peter.
1500
01:15:20,119 --> 01:15:23,622
So, Taylor, as lovely
as it is to see you...
1501
01:15:23,655 --> 01:15:26,925
- I needed to talk to someone.
- And you thought of me.
1502
01:15:28,527 --> 01:15:32,698
- Oh!
- I broke him.
1503
01:15:32,731 --> 01:15:37,369
When I met him, his kitchen
cabinets were filled with Legos
1504
01:15:37,403 --> 01:15:39,070
and only two days ago
1505
01:15:39,071 --> 01:15:42,541
his walls were covered
with unframed band posters.
1506
01:15:42,574 --> 01:15:44,543
- Sounds about right.
- And now, no more Legos.
1507
01:15:44,576 --> 01:15:47,646
- No more Sublime.
- I can buy you Sublime poster.
1508
01:15:47,680 --> 01:15:51,517
I took this wonderful
strange man of a boy,
1509
01:15:51,550 --> 01:15:53,452
and I-I-I changed him.
1510
01:15:53,485 --> 01:15:56,855
And he did and he
was perfect before.
1511
01:15:56,889 --> 01:16:00,526
- He wasn't perfect.
- No, he was perfectly imperfect.
1512
01:16:00,559 --> 01:16:03,829
And then I, I-I made him
dull, I made him like me.
1513
01:16:03,862 --> 01:16:06,030
Oh, Taylor, look.
I barely know you.
1514
01:16:06,031 --> 01:16:09,768
But I can say one thing for
certain is, you are not dull.
1515
01:16:09,802 --> 01:16:11,537
Well, we're not
fun like you two.
1516
01:16:11,570 --> 01:16:14,707
Fun gets you sent
to Disneyland jail.
1517
01:16:14,740 --> 01:16:16,742
Look, when Peter
and I are together,
1518
01:16:16,775 --> 01:16:19,678
we become the people we
were when we were 20.
1519
01:16:19,712 --> 01:16:22,581
But the two of you,
when you're together,
1520
01:16:22,614 --> 01:16:25,517
you make each other better.
1521
01:16:25,551 --> 01:16:28,887
Do you think he's making
a mistake marrying me?
1522
01:16:28,921 --> 01:16:31,223
You're putting me in a
really weird position.
1523
01:16:31,256 --> 01:16:35,194
If the two of you get
married, I lose Peter forever.
1524
01:16:35,227 --> 01:16:38,897
But if I stop thinking about
myself for like 30 seconds...
1525
01:16:40,432 --> 01:16:43,068
I do think you two
belong together.
1526
01:16:43,102 --> 01:16:46,572
Really?
1527
01:16:46,605 --> 01:16:49,441
Yeah, really.
1528
01:16:49,475 --> 01:16:52,611
I really love you, I think.
1529
01:16:52,644 --> 01:16:55,547
- Thank you. Oh! Hm!
- Be my maid of honor?
1530
01:16:57,149 --> 01:17:00,419
I think you belong together
too, like not romantically.
1531
01:17:00,452 --> 01:17:03,522
'Cause, that would be weird.
But you know, as friends.
1532
01:17:03,555 --> 01:17:06,325
You should stay friends because
just because I can't give him
1533
01:17:06,358 --> 01:17:09,027
what you give him doesn't mean
that part of him should die.
1534
01:17:09,028 --> 01:17:12,398
Yeah, well, uh, I dumped him
and he friend-dumped me. So...
1535
01:17:12,431 --> 01:17:16,802
I'm gonna fix this, I'm gonna
throw up and I'm gonna fix it.
1536
01:17:16,835 --> 01:17:21,039
What would you say if I
wanted to make out with you?
1537
01:17:21,040 --> 01:17:23,242
Huh, who?
1538
01:17:23,275 --> 01:17:24,510
Okay, all right, hold on.
1539
01:18:00,012 --> 01:18:03,382
- Wake up.
- What is it?
1540
01:18:03,415 --> 01:18:05,016
You left a random
woman in my room.
1541
01:18:05,017 --> 01:18:08,487
Yeah, she was too... Uh,
I'll take care of it.
1542
01:18:08,520 --> 01:18:11,156
Don't bother. She's gone.
1543
01:18:30,276 --> 01:18:32,812
- I don't know, it's kind of...
- He's got this.
1544
01:18:32,846 --> 01:18:35,415
Ah, you want to
protect your face, bro?
1545
01:18:39,152 --> 01:18:41,121
Okay, I'll, I'll be back.
1546
01:18:42,555 --> 01:18:44,057
I can leave if you want me to.
1547
01:18:46,659 --> 01:18:48,561
- Hi.
- Hi.
1548
01:18:48,595 --> 01:18:51,831
Taylor told me about last night.
Thank you for talking her down.
1549
01:18:51,865 --> 01:18:56,236
- It was nothing.
- Also... I'm sorry. I panicked.
1550
01:18:56,269 --> 01:18:58,114
I thought I had to lose you
to save my relationship.
1551
01:18:58,138 --> 01:19:00,407
- And I was a dick.
- You were.
1552
01:19:00,440 --> 01:19:02,575
Do you wanna punch
me in the other eye?
1553
01:19:02,609 --> 01:19:04,487
I feel really bad about
that so, I want to change
1554
01:19:04,511 --> 01:19:05,679
the subject really quickly?
1555
01:19:05,712 --> 01:19:08,014
Sorry, I missed
your bachelor party.
1556
01:19:08,048 --> 01:19:10,684
Oh, it's okay, you were
uninvited by some jerk.
1557
01:19:10,717 --> 01:19:13,853
- Me, I was a jerk. You got that?
- No, yeah, I got that. Yeah.
1558
01:19:13,887 --> 01:19:16,289
You missed quite a night, I mean
I can't remember most of it,
1559
01:19:16,322 --> 01:19:18,191
but apparently I did
a karaoke duet version
1560
01:19:18,224 --> 01:19:20,360
of My Heart Will Go On with
a stripper named Cobra.
1561
01:19:20,393 --> 01:19:23,430
- A female stripper named Cobra?
- I'm not sure.
1562
01:19:23,463 --> 01:19:27,534
- Yeah, undetermined. So...
- How you feeling?
1563
01:19:27,567 --> 01:19:30,437
Honestly, I wasn't nervous until
I saw the church and everything.
1564
01:19:30,470 --> 01:19:32,939
- I'm nervous, whoo!
- You'll do great.
1565
01:19:33,039 --> 01:19:36,476
- You think so?
- Yeah. I know so.
1566
01:19:36,509 --> 01:19:38,321
I want you to pay attention,
because what I'm about to
1567
01:19:38,345 --> 01:19:40,447
tell you just might be the
greatest thing that anyone
1568
01:19:40,480 --> 01:19:43,216
has told another human being
in the history of this planet.
1569
01:19:43,249 --> 01:19:45,051
- Wow!
- Are you ready?
1570
01:19:45,085 --> 01:19:48,355
Yes. No. Yes.
1571
01:19:51,858 --> 01:19:54,561
"I
came here tonight,
1572
01:19:54,594 --> 01:19:56,596
I didn't know what to expect."
1573
01:19:56,629 --> 01:19:58,598
"I seen a lot of
you people hatin' me
1574
01:19:58,631 --> 01:20:00,567
"and I didn't know what
to feel about that,
1575
01:20:00,600 --> 01:20:03,670
so I guess they didn't
like you much not either."
1576
01:20:03,703 --> 01:20:07,774
"During this fight, I've
seen a lot of changing,
1577
01:20:07,807 --> 01:20:11,978
the way yous feel about me, and
in the way I felt about you."
1578
01:20:12,012 --> 01:20:16,983
"In here, we were two
guys killing each other...
1579
01:20:18,551 --> 01:20:20,587
but I guess that's
better than 20 million."
1580
01:20:20,620 --> 01:20:21,955
Love that line.
1581
01:20:21,988 --> 01:20:26,126
"What I'm trying to say
is, if I can change,
1582
01:20:26,159 --> 01:20:30,830
and you can change, then
everybody can change!"
1583
01:20:30,864 --> 01:20:32,899
- Rocky 4.
- Rocky 4.
1584
01:20:32,932 --> 01:20:34,300
- You still got it.
- Yeah.
1585
01:20:36,636 --> 01:20:38,905
Okay.
1586
01:20:38,938 --> 01:20:41,908
- You coming? Okay.
- Yeah, in a second.
1587
01:20:45,412 --> 01:20:47,547
- Good luck.
- Thank you.
1588
01:20:57,190 --> 01:21:01,094
♪ You told me 'boy
look the other way' ♪
1589
01:21:02,729 --> 01:21:05,899
♪ You told me 'boy
bite your tongue' ♪
1590
01:21:08,968 --> 01:21:11,905
♪ Yes that's not the way
1591
01:21:11,938 --> 01:21:13,907
♪ Yeah that's not the way
1592
01:21:13,940 --> 01:21:17,744
♪ Ah that's just not the way
1593
01:21:17,777 --> 01:21:20,680
♪ That friends behave
1594
01:21:25,085 --> 01:21:29,155
♪ Ah that's just not the way
1595
01:21:29,189 --> 01:21:32,091
♪ That friends behave
1596
01:21:32,092 --> 01:21:35,094
♪ Oh no no no
1597
01:21:35,095 --> 01:21:38,431
♪ No no no no
1598
01:21:42,902 --> 01:21:45,772
♪ You lined me up
1599
01:21:45,805 --> 01:21:48,208
♪ Across the room
1600
01:21:48,241 --> 01:21:50,777
♪ Two falling sparks
1601
01:21:50,810 --> 01:21:53,446
♪ One willing fool
1602
01:21:53,480 --> 01:21:58,184
♪ And I I always knew
1603
01:21:58,218 --> 01:22:00,787
♪ That I would love
you from afar ♪
1604
01:22:05,592 --> 01:22:09,396
♪ You told me 'boy
look the other way' ♪
1605
01:22:11,364 --> 01:22:14,968
♪ You told me 'boy
hide those hands' ♪
1606
01:22:17,504 --> 01:22:22,475
♪ Well I've been living on
the crumbs of your love ♪
1607
01:22:22,509 --> 01:22:26,079
♪ And I'm starving now
1608
01:22:28,381 --> 01:22:31,951
♪ And that is just the way
1609
01:22:31,985 --> 01:22:35,088
♪ That we remain
1610
01:22:39,259 --> 01:22:43,296
♪ Ah that will be the way
1611
01:22:43,329 --> 01:22:46,599
♪ That we remain
1612
01:22:46,633 --> 01:22:49,369
♪ Oh no no no
1613
01:22:49,402 --> 01:22:52,472
♪ No no no no
1614
01:22:57,177 --> 01:23:00,046
♪ You lined me up
1615
01:23:00,080 --> 01:23:02,882
♪ Across the room
1616
01:23:02,916 --> 01:23:05,050
♪ Two falling sparks
1617
01:23:05,051 --> 01:23:07,754
♪ One willing fool
1618
01:23:07,787 --> 01:23:12,425
♪ And I I always knew
1619
01:23:12,459 --> 01:23:15,295
♪ That I would love
you from afar ♪
1620
01:23:20,066 --> 01:23:22,502
♪ You lined me up
1621
01:23:22,535 --> 01:23:25,305
♪ Across the room
1622
01:23:25,338 --> 01:23:27,874
♪ Two falling sparks
1623
01:23:27,907 --> 01:23:30,543
♪ One willing fool
1624
01:23:30,577 --> 01:23:34,881
♪ And I I always knew
1625
01:23:34,914 --> 01:23:40,120
♪ That I would love
you from afar ♪
1626
01:23:57,470 --> 01:24:02,942
♪ It shouldn't come
as a surprise ♪
1627
01:24:03,043 --> 01:24:07,747
♪ What I'm feeling
what I'm feeling now ♪
1628
01:24:07,781 --> 01:24:13,219
♪ It shouldn't come
as a surprise ♪
1629
01:24:13,253 --> 01:24:17,624
♪ She got darling hazel eyes
1630
01:24:20,894 --> 01:24:26,332
♪ It shouldn't come
as a surprise ♪
1631
01:24:26,366 --> 01:24:31,237
♪ What I'm feeling
what I'm feeling now ♪
1632
01:24:31,271 --> 01:24:35,642
♪ It shouldn't come
as a surprise ♪
1633
01:24:37,077 --> 01:24:41,748
♪ What I'm feeling
what I'm feeling now ♪
1634
01:24:41,781 --> 01:24:47,220
♪ It shouldn't come
as a surprise ♪
1635
01:24:47,253 --> 01:24:49,222
♪ What I'm feeling
what I'm... ♪♪127001
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