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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:00:14,560 --> 00:00:18,200 Girl: WIND. THERE'S NOTHING ELSE LIKE IT. 4 00:00:19,360 --> 00:00:21,880 PULLING YOU ACROSS THE WATER LIKE YOU'RE FLYING. 5 00:00:21,920 --> 00:00:24,160 IT'S TOTALLY... 6 00:00:24,200 --> 00:00:26,600 WELL, EXTREME. 7 00:00:34,960 --> 00:00:36,760 THAT'S ME-- 8 00:00:36,800 --> 00:00:38,480 MEGAN LARSON. 9 00:00:38,520 --> 00:00:41,520 YOUR FAIRLY AVERAGE TEENAGE GIRL. 10 00:00:49,120 --> 00:00:50,080 AND THAT'S CUTTER. 11 00:00:50,120 --> 00:00:53,280 THERE'S NOTHING EVEN REMOTELY AVERAGE ABOUT HIM. 12 00:01:29,160 --> 00:01:32,800 OVER HERE, MEGAN! 13 00:01:37,520 --> 00:01:39,080 THAT WAS SICK, MEGAN. 14 00:01:39,120 --> 00:01:40,360 YOU FLATLY RULE. 15 00:01:40,360 --> 00:01:41,360 THANKS, CUTTER. 16 00:01:41,360 --> 00:01:42,680 BE MY GIRLFRIEND? 17 00:01:42,680 --> 00:01:45,120 UM, OK. 18 00:01:46,200 --> 00:01:47,680 MOM, DAD! 19 00:01:47,680 --> 00:01:48,720 DAD AND I HAVE DECIDED 20 00:01:48,760 --> 00:01:50,320 TO GET BACK TOGETHER, MEGAN. 21 00:01:50,360 --> 00:01:51,960 AND I'M NEVER GONNA ACT 22 00:01:52,000 --> 00:01:54,000 LIKE A LITTLE FREAK AGAIN. 23 00:01:54,040 --> 00:01:54,880 COOL. 24 00:01:54,920 --> 00:01:57,400 MEGAN, AS THE MOST POPULAR GIRL IN SCHOOL, 25 00:01:57,440 --> 00:01:58,560 I, HEATHER HARTMAN, 26 00:01:58,600 --> 00:02:02,200 HEREBY WELCOME YOU INTO THE POPULAR GROUP. 27 00:02:03,720 --> 00:02:06,320 YOU ROCK! YES! MEGAN, YAY! 28 00:02:06,360 --> 00:02:07,560 Megan: DEAR DIARY, 29 00:02:07,560 --> 00:02:10,520 IF ONLY LIFE WERE LIKE MY DREAM 30 00:02:11,960 --> 00:02:14,000 DIE, ALIEN, DIE! 31 00:02:14,040 --> 00:02:15,840 TREVOR, NOT NOW. 32 00:02:15,880 --> 00:02:18,120 TREV! 33 00:02:18,160 --> 00:02:19,080 I'M JUST SAYING, 34 00:02:19,120 --> 00:02:22,000 YOU CAN'T BE A MEN IN BLACK, TREV. 35 00:02:22,040 --> 00:02:22,720 WHY NOT? 36 00:02:22,760 --> 00:02:23,960 BECAUSE YOU'RE ONLY ONE PERSON. 37 00:02:24,000 --> 00:02:25,240 I WANT TO BE A MEN IN BLACK. 38 00:02:25,240 --> 00:02:27,920 I WANT TO GET JIGGY WID IT. 39 00:02:28,000 --> 00:02:29,160 FINE. WHATEVER. 40 00:02:29,200 --> 00:02:31,480 PLUS, I'M GONNA BE A MAILMAN. 41 00:02:31,520 --> 00:02:33,840 WHY NOT MAILMEN? 42 00:02:35,400 --> 00:02:36,920 DAD WE DON'T SEE MUCH ANYMORE. 43 00:02:36,920 --> 00:02:38,880 HE'S ALWAYS BUSY, IT SEEMS LIKE. 44 00:02:38,920 --> 00:02:41,400 SOMETIMES I CAN BARELY EVEN REMEMBER A TIME 45 00:02:41,400 --> 00:02:43,000 WHEN WE WERE ALL TOGETHER. 46 00:02:43,040 --> 00:02:45,680 BUT THEN I ALWAYS DO. 47 00:02:45,720 --> 00:02:47,520 Kathy: OK, GRAB YOUR STUFF. 48 00:02:47,520 --> 00:02:49,240 ROKY, COME ON. 49 00:02:49,240 --> 00:02:50,120 TREVOR. 50 00:02:50,160 --> 00:02:51,160 OK, WE'RE OFF. 51 00:02:51,200 --> 00:02:53,600 FUN IN THE SUN. 52 00:02:54,240 --> 00:02:56,200 [CELL PHONE RINGS] 53 00:02:56,240 --> 00:02:57,160 [RING] 54 00:02:57,200 --> 00:02:58,320 UH, LET ME GET THIS. 55 00:02:58,360 --> 00:03:00,080 [RING] 56 00:03:00,080 --> 00:03:00,960 JUST A SEC. 57 00:03:01,000 --> 00:03:02,400 HELLO, FRED LARSON. 58 00:03:02,440 --> 00:03:04,280 YEAH, NO, NO. 59 00:03:04,280 --> 00:03:05,560 COME ON. LET'S GO. 60 00:03:05,600 --> 00:03:06,400 NO, THAT'S FINE. 61 00:03:06,440 --> 00:03:09,240 NO. IF YOU CAN JUST GET RID OF THEM... 62 00:03:09,280 --> 00:03:11,520 [SCREAMING] 63 00:03:11,560 --> 00:03:13,640 GIVE IT BACK, MEGAN. 64 00:03:13,680 --> 00:03:15,280 WHOO! 65 00:03:15,520 --> 00:03:18,360 DAD, COME ON! 66 00:03:20,280 --> 00:03:21,240 I GOT IT IN THE CAR. 67 00:03:21,280 --> 00:03:23,240 JUST BEAR WITH ME ONE SECOND 68 00:03:23,280 --> 00:03:25,200 WHILE I JUST-- 69 00:03:26,560 --> 00:03:28,640 GIVE ME JUST ONE SECOND, HERE. 70 00:03:28,640 --> 00:03:30,800 JUST GOT THE BOOK HERE... 71 00:03:31,360 --> 00:03:34,160 Fred: IF YOU HAVE ANY PROBLEMS, JUST GIVE ME A CALL. 72 00:03:34,200 --> 00:03:36,320 NO, GIVE ME A CALL ANYTIME. 73 00:03:36,400 --> 00:03:40,000 OK, THEN. GREAT TALKING TO YOU. 74 00:03:40,040 --> 00:03:41,440 TAKE CARE. 75 00:03:41,480 --> 00:03:44,280 OK, THEN, BYE. 76 00:03:44,320 --> 00:03:46,280 WELL, DIARY, IF YOU'RE WONDERING 77 00:03:46,320 --> 00:03:47,200 WHY MY FOLKS SPLIT UP, 78 00:03:47,240 --> 00:03:49,480 THERE YOU HAVE IT, I GUESS. 79 00:03:51,640 --> 00:03:52,600 AND THEN THERE'S MOM. 80 00:03:52,640 --> 00:03:54,560 PROBABLY THE ONLY PERSON ON THE PLANET 81 00:03:54,600 --> 00:03:56,680 WHO LOVES WINDSURFING AS MUCH AS I DO. 82 00:03:56,720 --> 00:04:00,400 SHE'S DEFINITELY NOT YOUR TYPICAL MOM. 83 00:04:00,440 --> 00:04:01,760 CRACKERS? 84 00:04:01,760 --> 00:04:03,760 COOL, I LOVE CRACKERS. 85 00:04:03,800 --> 00:04:05,920 SO DO I, BUT NOT FOR BREAKFAST. 86 00:04:05,960 --> 00:04:07,520 IS THAT IT? 87 00:04:07,600 --> 00:04:08,560 DON'T BE SILLY, MEGAN. 88 00:04:08,560 --> 00:04:11,240 WHAT KIND OF MOTHER GIVES HER KIDS JUST CRACKERS 89 00:04:11,280 --> 00:04:14,000 WITHOUT SOUP. 90 00:04:14,400 --> 00:04:17,080 MOM, YOU CAN'T HAVE SOUP FOR BREAKFAST. 91 00:04:17,120 --> 00:04:18,480 WHY NOT, MEGAN? SOUP IS GOOD FOOD. 92 00:04:18,520 --> 00:04:22,520 ROKY LIKES SOUP FOR BREAKFAST, DON'T YOU? 93 00:04:22,520 --> 00:04:24,160 ROKY'S A DOG. 94 00:04:24,160 --> 00:04:25,240 HE DRINKS FROM THE TOILET. 95 00:04:25,280 --> 00:04:29,520 OK, LET'S SEE WHAT ELSE I CAN MAKE YOU, MEG. 96 00:04:29,520 --> 00:04:31,840 UH, AH! 97 00:04:31,840 --> 00:04:34,160 I CAN MAKE A WONDERFUL TUNA SANDWICH. 98 00:04:34,200 --> 00:04:36,440 OK, I DON'T WANT YOU TO GET THE WRONG IDEA. 99 00:04:36,480 --> 00:04:38,880 MOM'S NOT USUALLY THIS BIZARRE. 100 00:04:38,880 --> 00:04:40,280 IT'S JUST EVER SINCE DAD LEFT, 101 00:04:40,320 --> 00:04:41,920 SHE'S BEEN A LITTLE DISTRACTED. 102 00:04:41,960 --> 00:04:43,560 AND, I MEAN, IF YOU THINK ABOUT IT, 103 00:04:43,600 --> 00:04:47,520 OUR LIFE IS REALLY COOL IN LOTS OF WAYS. 104 00:04:51,200 --> 00:04:51,920 OH! 105 00:04:51,960 --> 00:04:54,120 I KNEW I FORGOT SOMETHING! 106 00:04:54,160 --> 00:04:56,880 IN THE TENT! IN THE TENT! 107 00:04:59,040 --> 00:05:00,160 MAYBE MOM'S LONELY. 108 00:05:00,200 --> 00:05:03,400 BUT THEN, SHE'S HAD A COUPLE OF DATES. 109 00:05:05,040 --> 00:05:06,240 HYAH! OH! YA! YA! 110 00:05:06,240 --> 00:05:08,800 HOAH! HYAH! 111 00:05:08,840 --> 00:05:10,360 YA! YO! YO! 112 00:05:10,400 --> 00:05:11,400 YAAA! YA! 113 00:05:11,400 --> 00:05:12,640 UNH! 114 00:05:12,680 --> 00:05:15,680 IS HE ALWAYS SO ENTHUSIASTIC? 115 00:05:15,720 --> 00:05:16,520 THAT'S NOTHING. 116 00:05:16,560 --> 00:05:17,680 THE LAST GUY MY MOM DATED 117 00:05:17,720 --> 00:05:19,240 IS STILL IN A BODY CAST. 118 00:05:19,240 --> 00:05:20,880 BODY CAST? 119 00:05:20,920 --> 00:05:23,080 THEY SAY HE'LL MAKE A FULL RECOVERY, 120 00:05:23,080 --> 00:05:25,400 BUT I HAVE MY DOUBTS. 121 00:05:29,760 --> 00:05:32,000 OK, I'M NOT IN THE POPULAR GROUP, DIARY. 122 00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:34,760 I SHOULD TELL YOU THAT RIGHT NOW. 123 00:05:37,320 --> 00:05:40,520 I MEAN, WELL, I WAS IN IT FOR A WEEK LAST YEAR. 124 00:05:40,560 --> 00:05:43,200 THEY THOUGHT I WAS RELATED TO JEWEL OR SOMETHING. 125 00:05:43,280 --> 00:05:45,480 WELL, ACTUALLY, 126 00:05:45,520 --> 00:05:46,760 I--I KIND OF TOLD THEM THAT I WAS, 127 00:05:46,760 --> 00:05:50,480 BUT WHEN HEATHER HARTMAN FOUND OUT THAT I WASN'T, 128 00:05:50,520 --> 00:05:52,560 OH, IT WAS BAD. 129 00:05:54,600 --> 00:05:57,320 YOU'RE NOT JEWEL'S COUSIN, MEGAN. 130 00:05:57,360 --> 00:05:59,160 WELL, I HAVE A COUSIN 131 00:05:59,200 --> 00:06:00,800 WHO SORT OF LOOKS LIKE JEWEL, 132 00:06:00,880 --> 00:06:02,520 AND SHE SINGS PRETTY WELL. 133 00:06:02,560 --> 00:06:06,440 YOU CAN'T SIT AT OUR TABLE ANYMORE. 134 00:06:06,440 --> 00:06:07,280 I'M TELLING YOU, 135 00:06:07,320 --> 00:06:09,800 RETRACTABLE CLAWS WOULD BE TOTALLY COOL. 136 00:06:09,800 --> 00:06:12,440 THAT WOULD BE LAME, MIKEY. 137 00:06:13,520 --> 00:06:15,840 WHAT ABOUT X-RAY VISION? 138 00:06:15,880 --> 00:06:17,560 SHAPE-SHIFTING. 139 00:06:17,600 --> 00:06:19,760 THAT'D BE FRESH. 140 00:06:19,800 --> 00:06:20,680 THE TRUTH IS, THOUGH, DIARY, 141 00:06:20,720 --> 00:06:23,280 I REALLY ONLY WANT TO BE IN THE POPULAR GROUP 142 00:06:23,280 --> 00:06:24,840 FOR ONE REASON. 143 00:06:24,880 --> 00:06:25,840 CUTTER COBURN 144 00:06:25,880 --> 00:06:28,320 IS THE MOST EXTREME KID IN HIGH SCHOOL. 145 00:06:28,320 --> 00:06:32,200 LAST YEAR HE SKATED DOWN AN ENTIRE MOUNTAIN. 146 00:06:32,240 --> 00:06:33,840 [GRUNTING] 147 00:06:33,880 --> 00:06:34,960 WELL, HE FELL, MOSTLY, 148 00:06:34,960 --> 00:06:38,000 BUT IT WAS STILL TOTALLY RAD. 149 00:06:39,920 --> 00:06:43,160 SO DOES ANYONE KNOW THE ANSWER? 150 00:06:43,160 --> 00:06:44,920 CUTTER? 151 00:06:44,960 --> 00:06:47,000 CUTTER? 152 00:06:47,000 --> 00:06:47,960 MR. SINGH? 153 00:06:48,000 --> 00:06:50,400 DO YOU KNOW THE ANSWER? 154 00:06:50,440 --> 00:06:51,320 MR. SINGH, 155 00:06:51,320 --> 00:06:54,840 I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THE QUESTION IS. 156 00:06:57,640 --> 00:06:58,480 FOR A LONG TIME, 157 00:06:58,480 --> 00:07:00,600 I DON'T THINK CUTTER EVEN KNEW I EXISTED, 158 00:07:00,640 --> 00:07:02,240 BUT THEN HE STARTED WINDSURFING 159 00:07:02,280 --> 00:07:03,480 AND COMING TO MOM'S STORE... 160 00:07:03,520 --> 00:07:05,160 MAN, YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN THE AIR 161 00:07:05,160 --> 00:07:06,320 I WAS GETTING YESTERDAY. 162 00:07:06,320 --> 00:07:07,480 IT WAS NUKIN' LIKE BIG TIME. 163 00:07:07,520 --> 00:07:10,520 I WAS HITTING RAMP AFTER RAMP, DUDE. 164 00:07:17,320 --> 00:07:18,800 UH, HEY. 165 00:07:18,840 --> 00:07:19,760 OH, HEY. 166 00:07:19,800 --> 00:07:21,160 I REMEMBER YOU FROM SCHOOL. 167 00:07:21,200 --> 00:07:22,360 WHAT'S YOUR NAME AGAIN? 168 00:07:22,360 --> 00:07:24,120 CORGAN? VEGAN? FAGAN? 169 00:07:24,160 --> 00:07:25,120 MEGAN. 170 00:07:25,160 --> 00:07:26,360 MEGAN. 171 00:07:26,360 --> 00:07:29,200 UH, HEY, DO YOU THINK I COULD HAVE SOME OF THOSE CHIPS? 172 00:07:29,200 --> 00:07:31,120 YEAH, GO AHEAD. 173 00:07:34,840 --> 00:07:36,200 OH, MAN, THESE RULE. 174 00:07:36,200 --> 00:07:37,040 WHAT ARE THEY? 175 00:07:37,040 --> 00:07:38,560 BARBECUE. I MEAN, SOUR CREAM-- 176 00:07:38,560 --> 00:07:41,240 SOUR CREAM AND ONION. 177 00:07:41,280 --> 00:07:45,120 WINDSURFING'S COOL, LIKE, YOU KNOW, BECAUSE... 178 00:07:45,160 --> 00:07:47,640 THERE'S WIND, RIGHT? 179 00:07:48,560 --> 00:07:51,280 AND THEN ALSO, YOU'RE SURFING, 180 00:07:51,320 --> 00:07:53,320 SO YOU'RE, LIKE, WINDSURFING. 181 00:07:53,360 --> 00:07:56,080 I NEVER THOUGHT OF IT THAT WAY. 182 00:07:56,160 --> 00:07:58,200 WELL, UH, THANKS FOR THE CHIPS, 183 00:07:58,240 --> 00:07:59,880 UM, MEGAN. 184 00:07:59,880 --> 00:08:02,680 I'LL SEE YOU ON THE WATER. 185 00:08:04,560 --> 00:08:05,680 I LIKE YOUR HAIR. 186 00:08:05,720 --> 00:08:08,680 OH, THANKS. IT'S BLEACHED. 187 00:08:09,840 --> 00:08:11,400 I KNOW. 188 00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:14,640 BUT THAT'S ALL ANCIENT HISTORY NOW, DIARY, 189 00:08:14,720 --> 00:08:17,680 BECAUSE EVERYTHING'S CHANGED. 190 00:08:17,720 --> 00:08:19,840 WHAT DO YOU MEAN, YOU MET A GUY? 191 00:08:19,880 --> 00:08:21,160 HIS NAME IS COSMO. 192 00:08:21,200 --> 00:08:22,200 COSMO COLA. 193 00:08:22,240 --> 00:08:25,000 HE SOUNDS LIKE AN ALIEN FROM SPACE. 194 00:08:25,040 --> 00:08:25,760 IS HE, MOM? 195 00:08:25,760 --> 00:08:27,160 NOT THAT I'VE NOTICED, TREV. 196 00:08:27,200 --> 00:08:29,840 WAIT A MINUTE. WHERE DID YOU MEET THIS GUY, MOM? 197 00:08:29,880 --> 00:08:31,200 UH, IT'S VERY SILLY. 198 00:08:31,280 --> 00:08:33,280 I WAS WINDSURFING... 199 00:08:34,440 --> 00:08:37,280 HEY! WHA--HEY! 200 00:08:44,960 --> 00:08:45,800 IT WAS RIDICULOUS, 201 00:08:45,840 --> 00:08:47,520 BUT IT WAS REALLY GREAT, TOO. 202 00:08:47,560 --> 00:08:49,560 MEG, HE WANTED TO RESCUE ME 203 00:08:49,600 --> 00:08:50,600 FROM THE WAVES. 204 00:08:50,600 --> 00:08:52,440 MOM, YOU WEREN'T DROWNING. 205 00:08:52,440 --> 00:08:54,800 SURE, BUT THAT'S NOT THE POINT. 206 00:08:54,800 --> 00:08:55,680 HE WAS WILLING TO. 207 00:08:55,760 --> 00:08:57,200 I HAVE A VERY BAD FEELING. 208 00:08:57,240 --> 00:09:00,360 WE STARTED TALKING, AND WE JUST CLICKED. 209 00:09:00,400 --> 00:09:01,360 ARE YOU ALL RIGHT? 210 00:09:01,400 --> 00:09:04,200 I SAW YOU BEING BLOWN ABOUT BY THE WIND. 211 00:09:04,240 --> 00:09:06,200 I'M WINDSURFING. 212 00:09:06,240 --> 00:09:07,640 I'M COS. 213 00:09:07,640 --> 00:09:08,800 NICE TO MEET YOU. 214 00:09:08,800 --> 00:09:10,760 WE TALKED FOR HOURS, 215 00:09:10,800 --> 00:09:12,120 I GUESS, I MEAN... 216 00:09:12,120 --> 00:09:15,080 HE HAS THIS CHILDLIKE QUALITY 217 00:09:15,120 --> 00:09:17,280 THAT I FIND SO REFRESHING. 218 00:09:17,320 --> 00:09:18,760 CANDY? 219 00:09:18,800 --> 00:09:21,480 OH, SURE. 220 00:09:22,320 --> 00:09:25,560 OK, WHERE'S THIS COSMO COLA FROM. 221 00:09:25,600 --> 00:09:28,560 CANADA. THE YUKON, OF ALL PLACES. 222 00:09:28,600 --> 00:09:31,320 [WOLF HOWLS] 223 00:09:31,920 --> 00:09:33,600 MOM, NO ONE LIVES IN THE YUKON. 224 00:09:33,640 --> 00:09:34,360 IT'S, LIKE, DESERTED. 225 00:09:34,400 --> 00:09:36,040 IT'S A MISSILE RANGE OR SOMETHING. 226 00:09:36,080 --> 00:09:38,200 WELL, HE AND HIS DAUGHTER LIVE THERE. 227 00:09:38,240 --> 00:09:39,160 HIS DAUGHTER? 228 00:09:39,160 --> 00:09:41,240 ARIEL. SHE'S 14, TOO, MEG. 229 00:09:41,280 --> 00:09:42,640 ISN'T THAT GREAT? 230 00:09:42,680 --> 00:09:43,960 POSSIBLY. 231 00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:44,960 MEG. 232 00:09:45,000 --> 00:09:46,920 DO I LOOK LIKE A GEEK? 233 00:09:46,960 --> 00:09:49,160 OK, BYE. 234 00:09:50,640 --> 00:09:52,640 I'LL BE HOME SOON. 235 00:09:53,680 --> 00:09:57,440 ♪ SHE'S GOT MYSTERY ♪ 236 00:09:57,480 --> 00:10:00,440 ♪ THERE'S A SECRET IN HER EYES ♪ 237 00:10:00,480 --> 00:10:04,200 ♪ SHE'S MY SOUL SATISFIER ♪ 238 00:10:04,200 --> 00:10:07,240 ♪ SHE'S MY SWEETIE PIE ♪ 239 00:10:07,280 --> 00:10:10,200 ♪ FREE MY FROZEN HEART ♪ 240 00:10:10,200 --> 00:10:13,560 ♪ FREE MY FROZEN HEART ♪ 241 00:10:13,600 --> 00:10:16,280 ♪ WHAT A RUSH ♪ 242 00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:25,080 HEY. 243 00:10:25,120 --> 00:10:26,040 MOM. 244 00:10:26,080 --> 00:10:29,280 WHY WON'T YOU LET ANYONE LISTEN TO YOUR MUSIC? 245 00:10:29,320 --> 00:10:30,280 BECAUSE. 246 00:10:30,320 --> 00:10:33,280 WELL, AT LEAST YOU HAVE A GOOD REASON. 247 00:10:33,360 --> 00:10:34,920 SO, TONIGHT'S THE BIG NIGHT, HUH? 248 00:10:34,960 --> 00:10:37,680 EVERYBODY'S FINALLY GONNA MEET. 249 00:10:37,720 --> 00:10:39,400 AREN'T YOU EXCITED? 250 00:10:39,400 --> 00:10:42,000 DON'T I LOOK EXCITED? 251 00:10:43,040 --> 00:10:44,560 COME ON, YOU. HELP ME CLEAN UP. 252 00:10:44,560 --> 00:10:45,760 I WAS GOING TO BE AMBITIOUS 253 00:10:45,800 --> 00:10:46,640 AND COOK A WHOLE CHICKEN, 254 00:10:46,680 --> 00:10:49,400 BUT SINCE COS REALLY LIKES HOT DOGS... 255 00:10:49,400 --> 00:10:50,560 A GOURMET, HUH? 256 00:10:50,560 --> 00:10:51,920 MEGAN, BE NICE. 257 00:10:51,920 --> 00:10:52,760 I AM ALWAYS NICE. 258 00:10:52,800 --> 00:10:54,560 NEW PEOPLE AREN'T ALWAYS SO BAD, YOU KNOW. 259 00:10:54,560 --> 00:10:58,160 I MEAN, SOMETIMES CHANGE CAN BE A GOOD THING IF YOU WELCOME IT. 260 00:10:58,200 --> 00:11:01,080 UGH! YOU'RE NOT GONNA CALL ME GRASSHOPPER NOW, ARE YOU? 261 00:11:01,080 --> 00:11:02,880 WHERE DID YOU GET SUCH A SHARP TONGUE? 262 00:11:02,920 --> 00:11:04,920 YOU SHOULD HEAR ALL THE THINGS I THINK 263 00:11:04,920 --> 00:11:06,800 AND DON'T SAY. 264 00:11:06,840 --> 00:11:08,200 HONEY, I GOT TO SAY, 265 00:11:08,240 --> 00:11:10,040 IT WOULD MEAN A WHOLE LOT TO ME 266 00:11:10,080 --> 00:11:12,080 IF YOU WOULD AT LEAST TRY. 267 00:11:12,080 --> 00:11:14,640 COSMO MAKES ME REALLY HAPPY, YOU KNOW, MEG? 268 00:11:14,680 --> 00:11:16,320 AND MAYBE YOU'LL LIKE HIM, TOO, 269 00:11:16,400 --> 00:11:17,920 IF YOU GIVE HIM A CHANCE. 270 00:11:17,920 --> 00:11:19,840 YOU KNOW WHAT, MOM, YOU'RE RIGHT. 271 00:11:19,880 --> 00:11:22,480 I'LL TRY. I REALLY-- I REALLY WILL. 272 00:11:22,520 --> 00:11:24,200 THANKS, SWEETIE. 273 00:11:24,240 --> 00:11:25,640 AND MAYBE I'LL THINK 274 00:11:25,680 --> 00:11:27,280 THAT HE AND ARIEL ARE GREAT. 275 00:11:27,280 --> 00:11:28,200 IF YOU LIKE THEM, 276 00:11:28,240 --> 00:11:29,840 THEN THEY MUST BE GREAT, RIGHT? 277 00:11:29,880 --> 00:11:32,400 OF COURSE YOU ALSO LIKE LORD OF THE DANCE, 278 00:11:32,440 --> 00:11:34,400 BUT WE WON'T GO THERE. 279 00:11:34,440 --> 00:11:35,480 [DOORBELL RINGS] 280 00:11:35,520 --> 00:11:37,280 THAT'LL BE THEM. 281 00:11:37,280 --> 00:11:40,560 YOU WANT TO GET THE DOOR, MEG? 282 00:11:40,600 --> 00:11:42,280 SURE. 283 00:11:46,800 --> 00:11:47,960 IT'S GONNA BE GREAT. 284 00:11:47,960 --> 00:11:49,200 IT'S GONNA BE GREAT. 285 00:11:49,240 --> 00:11:50,400 IT'S GONNA BE GREAT. 286 00:11:50,480 --> 00:11:52,760 PLEASE BE GREAT. 287 00:11:55,960 --> 00:11:57,760 MEGAN LARSON! 288 00:11:57,800 --> 00:12:00,080 MEGAN LARSON! 289 00:12:00,120 --> 00:12:00,840 MOM! 290 00:12:00,880 --> 00:12:02,160 YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW HAPPY I AM 291 00:12:02,240 --> 00:12:03,520 TO FINALLY MEET YOU. 292 00:12:03,560 --> 00:12:04,320 ARE YOU COSMO? 293 00:12:04,360 --> 00:12:06,160 YOU SHOULD BE ON A GAME SHOW, MEGAN. 294 00:12:06,160 --> 00:12:07,760 I LIKE HOLLYWOOD SQUARES, MYSELF. 295 00:12:07,800 --> 00:12:09,880 WHOOPI FOR THE BLOCK! 296 00:12:10,960 --> 00:12:15,240 IT WAS WORSE THAN I COULD HAVE POSSIBLY IMAGINED, DIARY. 297 00:12:15,280 --> 00:12:16,320 [TOY GUN BEEPS] 298 00:12:16,320 --> 00:12:18,240 ARE YOU A GOOD ALIEN... 299 00:12:18,280 --> 00:12:21,400 OR A BAD ALIEN? 300 00:12:23,320 --> 00:12:24,800 GOOD, MOSTLY, 301 00:12:24,840 --> 00:12:27,240 BUT SOMETIMES BAD. 302 00:12:27,280 --> 00:12:30,280 LIKE NOW. AAH! 303 00:12:30,320 --> 00:12:32,200 WHOA! 304 00:12:32,240 --> 00:12:34,200 AH, WHAT'S THIS? 305 00:12:34,240 --> 00:12:36,160 [DOG WHINES] 306 00:12:36,160 --> 00:12:37,360 I LOVE DOGS. 307 00:12:37,440 --> 00:12:38,320 SUCH TINY BRAINS 308 00:12:38,320 --> 00:12:40,640 IN SUCH LARGE, POWERFUL BODIES. 309 00:12:40,680 --> 00:12:41,640 COSMO. 310 00:12:41,680 --> 00:12:43,200 KATHY! 311 00:12:45,320 --> 00:12:47,560 I'M SO HAPPY TO SEE YOU. 312 00:12:47,600 --> 00:12:49,040 ME, TOO. 313 00:12:49,120 --> 00:12:50,080 AH, I HAVE GAS-- 314 00:12:50,160 --> 00:12:51,520 UH, I MEAN, ROOT BEER. 315 00:12:51,520 --> 00:12:52,960 THESE ARE FOR YOU. 316 00:12:53,040 --> 00:12:54,840 THANK YOU, COSMO. 317 00:12:54,840 --> 00:12:57,120 UH, WHERE'S ARIEL? 318 00:12:57,160 --> 00:12:58,120 UH, SHE'S OUT IN THE CAR. 319 00:12:58,160 --> 00:13:00,160 SHE DOESN'T LIKE THE WIND. 320 00:13:00,200 --> 00:13:01,160 [MEGAN LAUGHS] 321 00:13:01,200 --> 00:13:04,440 SHE DOESN'T LIKE THE WIND? 322 00:13:04,480 --> 00:13:07,600 ACTUALLY, WIND CAN BE VERY FRIGHTENING 323 00:13:07,680 --> 00:13:09,400 IF YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND IT. 324 00:13:09,440 --> 00:13:11,040 IF YOU'RE AN ALIEN, 325 00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:13,680 THE WIND CAN JUST BLOW YOU AWAY. 326 00:13:13,720 --> 00:13:15,160 EXACTLY. RIGHT. 327 00:13:15,200 --> 00:13:17,360 OF COURSE, WIND CAN ALSO BE 328 00:13:17,360 --> 00:13:20,560 A WONDERFUL WAY OF MEETING PEOPLE. 329 00:13:23,200 --> 00:13:26,840 UH, YOU WANT TO GO HELP HER IN, HUH, MEG? 330 00:13:26,880 --> 00:13:28,160 MOM! 331 00:13:28,240 --> 00:13:29,400 MEGAN. 332 00:13:29,400 --> 00:13:31,360 OK. 333 00:13:42,360 --> 00:13:44,120 HELLO? 334 00:13:44,160 --> 00:13:46,920 ARIEL, HELLO? 335 00:14:05,360 --> 00:14:07,880 [PEBBLES CRUNCH] 336 00:14:18,760 --> 00:14:20,240 WHAT ARE YOU DOING UNDER THERE? 337 00:14:20,280 --> 00:14:23,360 I FEAR THE WIND. 338 00:14:26,120 --> 00:14:27,120 OH. 339 00:14:27,120 --> 00:14:28,800 Ariel: DEAR DIARY, 340 00:14:28,800 --> 00:14:29,560 I CANNOT MAKE SENSE 341 00:14:29,600 --> 00:14:32,280 OF THIS STRANGE PLANET CALLED EARTH. 342 00:14:46,320 --> 00:14:49,200 EVERY TIME I LOOK AT THIS HORRID VEHICLE-- 343 00:14:49,280 --> 00:14:50,840 THE RUBBERY FLESH, 344 00:14:50,880 --> 00:14:52,920 THE FLAT FACE, 345 00:14:52,960 --> 00:14:53,760 THE GHASTLY YELLOW HAIR 346 00:14:53,800 --> 00:14:56,720 THAT GROWS OUT OF THIS HIDEOUS SKULL-- 347 00:14:56,760 --> 00:14:58,000 I CAN ONLY THINK... 348 00:14:58,080 --> 00:15:00,160 I AM GROTESQUE. 349 00:15:00,160 --> 00:15:03,200 THE SAME DREAM COMES TO ME MOST EVERY NIGHT. 350 00:15:03,240 --> 00:15:06,480 I AM BACK ON MY HOME PLANET OF ZIRCALON. 351 00:15:06,480 --> 00:15:07,280 I AM, ONCE AGAIN, 352 00:15:07,320 --> 00:15:09,520 A BEAUTIFUL PINK BALL OF GAS, 353 00:15:09,560 --> 00:15:12,760 FLOATING NEXT TO MY BELOVED FANUL. 354 00:15:17,680 --> 00:15:20,600 OH, FINE, HANDSOME, 355 00:15:20,640 --> 00:15:22,320 INTELLIGENT FANUL. 356 00:15:22,320 --> 00:15:24,840 HOW I MISS FLOATING WITH YOU. 357 00:15:24,840 --> 00:15:27,160 I MISS MY TRUE SELF, 358 00:15:27,160 --> 00:15:28,160 MY ESSENCE. 359 00:15:28,160 --> 00:15:29,360 HOW I LONG TO BE 360 00:15:29,360 --> 00:15:32,760 ZUEZAV OF ZIRCALON ONCE AGAIN. 361 00:15:32,800 --> 00:15:35,280 AND MOTHER AND FATHER ARE THERE AS WELL, 362 00:15:35,320 --> 00:15:37,680 FLOATING BY MY SIDE. 363 00:15:37,680 --> 00:15:39,240 OH, THE JOY... 364 00:15:39,280 --> 00:15:40,840 THE RAPTURE... 365 00:15:40,840 --> 00:15:42,520 THE BLISS. 366 00:15:42,520 --> 00:15:46,600 I KNEW THAT WE WERE GOING TO HAVE TO LEAVE ZIRCALON, DIARY. 367 00:15:46,640 --> 00:15:49,080 I KNEW THAT DADDY'S LIFE WAS IN DANGER 368 00:15:49,120 --> 00:15:52,000 BECAUSE HE WAS A FREEDOM FIGHTER. 369 00:15:53,520 --> 00:15:54,320 I KNEW, AS WELL, 370 00:15:54,360 --> 00:15:56,240 THAT S'VAD WAS A REPRESSIVE EMPEROR, 371 00:15:56,280 --> 00:16:00,560 AND THAT WE WERE NOT COMPLETELY FREE ON ZIRCALON. 372 00:16:02,320 --> 00:16:05,040 STILL, I NEVER EXPECTED TO HAVE TO LEAVE 373 00:16:05,040 --> 00:16:07,280 SO SUDDENLY, DIARY. 374 00:16:08,560 --> 00:16:12,520 IT ALL HAPPENED SO INCREDIBLY FAST. 375 00:16:28,640 --> 00:16:31,120 AND IN THAT ONE BRIEF MOMENT, 376 00:16:31,160 --> 00:16:32,840 MY MOTHER WAS LOST FOREVER... 377 00:16:32,880 --> 00:16:33,680 [POP] 378 00:16:33,760 --> 00:16:37,240 NOW JUST A PART OF THE GREAT COSMIC GAS. 379 00:16:51,520 --> 00:16:52,600 STRANGELY, DIARY, 380 00:16:52,600 --> 00:16:55,320 WITH ALL ITS HORRORS AND BIZARRE CUSTOMS, 381 00:16:55,360 --> 00:16:57,880 EARTH SEEMS TO POSSES A WONDERFUL ABUNDANCE 382 00:16:57,920 --> 00:16:59,800 OF THE ONE SUBSTANCE WE ZIRCALONIANS 383 00:16:59,840 --> 00:17:01,400 NEED TO SURVIVE... 384 00:17:01,440 --> 00:17:04,760 THE ELEMENT KNOWN AS CO2. 385 00:17:04,760 --> 00:17:07,200 [ALIEN VOICE] AT LEAST I STILL HAVE GAS. 386 00:17:11,200 --> 00:17:13,000 MONSTROSITY. 387 00:17:13,040 --> 00:17:15,200 I BECAME DESPERATE, DIARY. 388 00:17:15,240 --> 00:17:16,240 DESPERATE FOR ANY HELP 389 00:17:16,280 --> 00:17:19,320 IN NAVIGATING THIS STRANGE AND FRIGHTENING PLACE. 390 00:17:19,360 --> 00:17:21,520 THAT IS WHEN I TURNED TO OUR NEIGHBOR, 391 00:17:21,600 --> 00:17:23,520 THE SPIRITUAL GUIDE, SERENA SOO. 392 00:17:23,560 --> 00:17:24,720 [CATS MEOW] 393 00:17:24,760 --> 00:17:26,400 OFF, GANDHI. 394 00:17:26,480 --> 00:17:28,280 AWAY, PICASSO. 395 00:17:29,920 --> 00:17:32,680 ARIEL, I KNOW WHAT TROUBLES YOU. 396 00:17:32,720 --> 00:17:34,360 YOU DO? 397 00:17:34,400 --> 00:17:39,320 IN THE MONTH SINCE YOU AND YOUR CHARMING FATHER HAVE MOVED IN, 398 00:17:39,320 --> 00:17:42,560 I'VE PERCEIVED THAT YOU ARE DIFFERENT. 399 00:17:42,600 --> 00:17:43,440 YES. 400 00:17:43,480 --> 00:17:46,760 YOU DON'T FEEL THAT YOU BELONG HERE. 401 00:17:46,800 --> 00:17:47,440 NO. 402 00:17:47,480 --> 00:17:49,320 AND IN THIS YOU ARE CORRECT. 403 00:17:49,320 --> 00:17:50,200 YOU HAVE LIVED 404 00:17:50,240 --> 00:17:53,120 MANY, MANY TIMES BEFORE, ARIEL. 405 00:17:53,160 --> 00:17:55,280 MOST RECENTLY YOU WERE A COWHAND 406 00:17:55,320 --> 00:17:58,120 ON A LARGE RANCH IN MONTANA. 407 00:17:58,160 --> 00:17:59,240 YOU WERE CRUSHED BY A COW. 408 00:17:59,280 --> 00:18:02,880 YOU HAVE NOT YET PSYCHICALLY RECOVERED FROM THIS. 409 00:18:02,920 --> 00:18:06,880 DO YOU FEEL THE TRUTH OF WHAT I'M TELLING YOU? 410 00:18:06,920 --> 00:18:09,480 DON'T SPEAK. 411 00:18:09,520 --> 00:18:11,560 I AM A PSYCHIC. 412 00:18:11,600 --> 00:18:14,960 I ALREADY KNOW WHAT YOU ARE THINKING. 413 00:18:15,000 --> 00:18:15,680 [FLY BUZZES] 414 00:18:15,680 --> 00:18:19,040 I CAN SEE VERY CLEARLY EXACT-- 415 00:18:19,080 --> 00:18:21,280 [COUGHING] 416 00:18:21,320 --> 00:18:22,680 I TRIED TO TELL SERENA SOO 417 00:18:22,680 --> 00:18:23,600 ABOUT THE FLYING INSECT, DIARY, 418 00:18:23,640 --> 00:18:26,400 BUT, OF COURSE, SHE COULD NOT READ MY MIND. 419 00:18:26,440 --> 00:18:29,680 SHE IS A RIDICULOUS AND PATHETIC PERSON. 420 00:18:29,680 --> 00:18:30,720 BUT SHE AT LEAST POSSESSES 421 00:18:30,760 --> 00:18:33,280 A SOMEWHAT GASEOUS MANNER. 422 00:18:33,320 --> 00:18:36,400 BUT WHAT DOES ANY OF IT MATTER NOW, DIARY? 423 00:18:36,440 --> 00:18:38,840 NOW THAT DREARINESS AND DREAD 424 00:18:38,880 --> 00:18:42,160 HAVE SO UTTERLY ENGULFED MY LIFE. 425 00:18:45,960 --> 00:18:47,360 THERE. WHAT DO YOU THINK? 426 00:18:47,360 --> 00:18:49,440 I HATE IT HERE, DADDY. 427 00:18:49,440 --> 00:18:52,280 EVERYTHING HERE IS SO UGLY 428 00:18:52,320 --> 00:18:55,280 AND SOLID AND HEAVY. 429 00:18:57,200 --> 00:18:59,880 I KNOW IT'S HARD, ARIEL. 430 00:18:59,880 --> 00:19:02,680 I MISS OUR HOME, TOO. 431 00:19:02,720 --> 00:19:04,440 THERE WAS TRULY NOTHING 432 00:19:04,480 --> 00:19:07,360 LIKE A GREAT DAY OF FLOATING-- 433 00:19:07,400 --> 00:19:09,920 EXPANDING IN THE HEAT... 434 00:19:10,000 --> 00:19:12,720 CONTRACTING WHEN IT COOLS OFF. 435 00:19:13,480 --> 00:19:15,560 WHY CAN'T WE JUST GO BACK, THEN? 436 00:19:15,560 --> 00:19:17,000 WE'D BE NEAR MOMMY. 437 00:19:17,040 --> 00:19:19,120 MOMMY HAS, UH... 438 00:19:19,160 --> 00:19:21,920 THINNED OUT A LITTLE, ARIEL. 439 00:19:21,920 --> 00:19:23,920 BESIDES, I'D BE IMPRISONED FOREVER 440 00:19:23,920 --> 00:19:26,120 IN A FROZEN CUBE. 441 00:19:26,160 --> 00:19:29,360 WE CAME HERE TO ESCAPE, TO BE FREE. 442 00:19:29,400 --> 00:19:30,840 FREE TO BE HIDEOUS. 443 00:19:30,880 --> 00:19:31,760 OH, LIFE ON EARTH 444 00:19:31,760 --> 00:19:34,440 IS FULL OF WONDROUS POSSIBILITIES, ARIEL. 445 00:19:34,440 --> 00:19:38,240 ONE CAN DO OR BE WHATEVER ONE WANTS HERE. 446 00:19:38,240 --> 00:19:39,600 LOOK. 447 00:19:40,760 --> 00:19:42,560 THIS IS A DUMMY. 448 00:19:42,600 --> 00:19:43,800 AN ARTIFICIAL HUMAN 449 00:19:43,840 --> 00:19:44,760 THAT ONE CAN SPEAK THROUGH. 450 00:19:44,760 --> 00:19:46,240 [DUMMY VOICE] HELLO, ARIEL. 451 00:19:46,280 --> 00:19:48,160 [NORMAL VOICE] HOW CAN ONE NOT LOVE A WORLD 452 00:19:48,200 --> 00:19:50,600 IN WHICH SUCH A THING EXISTS? 453 00:19:54,440 --> 00:19:57,560 YOU ARE COMPLETELY IMBALANCED, DADDY. 454 00:19:58,960 --> 00:20:01,000 AND THESE NAMES YOU HAVE GIVEN US: 455 00:20:01,040 --> 00:20:03,120 ARIEL AND COSMO COLA. 456 00:20:03,120 --> 00:20:05,040 RIDICULOUS, PATHETIC. 457 00:20:08,960 --> 00:20:10,280 AND THESE EARTHLINGS-- THEY PAY MONEY 458 00:20:10,280 --> 00:20:12,760 FOR THESE WORTHLESS SOLIDS WE BROUGHT WITH US. 459 00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:15,240 THEY'RE QUITE VALUABLE HERE. 460 00:20:20,320 --> 00:20:23,120 I MISS FANUL SO TERRIBLY, DADDY. 461 00:20:23,120 --> 00:20:25,000 PLEASE, MAY I COMMUNICATE WITH HIM? 462 00:20:25,040 --> 00:20:28,880 HE WOULD NOT BETRAY ME. I KNOW THAT HE WOULD NOT. 463 00:20:28,920 --> 00:20:32,280 FANUL IS THE SON OF THE EMPEROR S'VAD. 464 00:20:32,320 --> 00:20:34,440 YOU ARE MY DAUGHTER. 465 00:20:34,480 --> 00:20:35,960 IT IS NOT POSSIBLE. 466 00:20:36,000 --> 00:20:37,200 BUT, DADDY-- 467 00:20:37,240 --> 00:20:39,560 I'M SORRY, ARIEL. 468 00:20:47,680 --> 00:20:48,760 AHH. 469 00:20:48,800 --> 00:20:53,160 [ALIEN VOICE] LOOK WHAT A BEAUTIFUL DAY IT IS, ARIEL. 470 00:20:54,520 --> 00:20:57,680 [NORMAL VOICE] BEING SOLID IS INVIGORATING. 471 00:20:57,680 --> 00:20:59,360 AHH! 472 00:20:59,360 --> 00:21:02,360 LIFE ON EARTH IS FUN, ARIEL. 473 00:21:02,360 --> 00:21:04,880 I ONLY HOPE SOMEDAY YOU'LL FEEL THE SAME. 474 00:21:04,920 --> 00:21:06,880 WHAT COULD BE LESS FUN THAN THIS? 475 00:21:06,920 --> 00:21:08,800 I WANT MY BOYFRIEND BACK, DADDY. 476 00:21:08,840 --> 00:21:11,640 I WANT TO SEE FANUL, AND I WANT TO GO HO-- 477 00:21:11,680 --> 00:21:14,840 THE WIND. THE WIND! 478 00:21:16,280 --> 00:21:18,760 IT CAN'T HURT US, ARIEL. IT-- 479 00:21:21,280 --> 00:21:22,600 I'M COMING APART. 480 00:21:22,640 --> 00:21:25,680 I'M REALLY COMING APART. 481 00:21:30,000 --> 00:21:32,200 WE FEAR THE WIND. 482 00:21:36,560 --> 00:21:39,360 [WATER SLOSHING] 483 00:21:41,280 --> 00:21:42,120 FANUL, FANUL, 484 00:21:42,160 --> 00:21:43,840 WHY MUST YOU BE THE SON OF THE EMPEROR, 485 00:21:43,880 --> 00:21:45,800 AND I THE FREEDOM FIGHTER'S DAUGHTER? 486 00:21:45,840 --> 00:21:48,960 WE'RE JUST LIKE THE TRAGIC STORY 487 00:21:49,000 --> 00:21:50,080 OF GLABA AND GROKNO, 488 00:21:50,080 --> 00:21:53,040 THE 2 STAR-CROSSED BUBBLES. 489 00:21:55,560 --> 00:21:56,960 BUT WE WILL MEET AGAIN, FANUL, 490 00:21:57,000 --> 00:21:58,960 FOR I WILL COME HOME TO YOU. 491 00:21:59,000 --> 00:22:00,800 [COUGHING] 492 00:22:00,880 --> 00:22:01,920 UNTIL I DO, 493 00:22:01,920 --> 00:22:04,720 I MUST TRY TO HOLD ON TO THE BEAUTY AND MAJESTY 494 00:22:04,720 --> 00:22:07,040 OF MY ZIRCALONIAN HERITAGE. 495 00:22:07,080 --> 00:22:09,960 PERHAPS THAT WILL KEEP ME GOING. 496 00:22:10,000 --> 00:22:12,560 ♪ ZIRCALON, ZIRCALON ♪ 497 00:22:12,560 --> 00:22:15,280 ♪ BUBBLES DANCE 'CROSS THE MOON ♪ 498 00:22:15,320 --> 00:22:18,320 ♪ ZIRCALON, ZIRCALON ♪ 499 00:22:18,400 --> 00:22:23,560 ♪ MAKE US FREE, WILL YOU SOON? ♪ 500 00:22:24,840 --> 00:22:27,360 THE WIND WAS BLOWING HER ABOUT, ARIEL. 501 00:22:30,680 --> 00:22:31,920 I KNEW I HAD TO SAVE HER, 502 00:22:31,920 --> 00:22:34,640 SO I JUMPED IN, 503 00:22:34,680 --> 00:22:36,280 BUT WHEN I REACHED HER, 504 00:22:36,280 --> 00:22:37,640 SHE WASN'T FRIGHTENED AT ALL. 505 00:22:37,680 --> 00:22:40,200 I SAW YOU BEING BLOWN ABOUT BY THE WIND. 506 00:22:40,240 --> 00:22:41,760 I'M WINDSURFING. 507 00:22:41,760 --> 00:22:44,080 SHE'S THE MOST REMARKABLE CREATURE. 508 00:22:44,120 --> 00:22:47,200 KATHY LARSON? 509 00:22:47,240 --> 00:22:48,200 THE MOST-- 510 00:22:48,240 --> 00:22:51,160 [ALIEN VOICE] LOVELY, INTELLIGENT... 511 00:22:51,200 --> 00:22:53,640 [NORMAL VOICE] WONDERFUL HUMAN ON THE PLANET, ARIEL. 512 00:22:53,640 --> 00:22:55,640 BUT IT'S UNTHINKABLE. 513 00:22:55,640 --> 00:22:57,760 MOMMY. 514 00:23:06,480 --> 00:23:10,240 YOUR MOTHER WAS AN EXTRAORDINARY BUBBLE, ARIEL. 515 00:23:10,280 --> 00:23:12,880 AND I WILL NEVER FORGET HER. 516 00:23:12,920 --> 00:23:14,520 WE HAD MANY WONDERFUL MEMORIES TOGETHER, 517 00:23:14,560 --> 00:23:17,840 AND I WILL ALWAYS CHERISH THOSE MEMORIES. 518 00:23:17,880 --> 00:23:18,840 JUST AS I WILL ALWAYS 519 00:23:18,880 --> 00:23:21,920 CHERISH SEEING YOUR MOTHER IN YOU. 520 00:23:23,240 --> 00:23:26,160 BUT WE LIVE HERE NOW. 521 00:23:26,800 --> 00:23:31,320 AND I THINK WE NEED TO MAKE A LIFE HERE. 522 00:23:31,320 --> 00:23:32,200 WE'RE HUMANS NOW, ARIEL. 523 00:23:32,240 --> 00:23:33,880 WE NEED TO LIVE WITH OTHER HUMANS. 524 00:23:33,920 --> 00:23:36,760 I DON'T THINK MOMMY WOULD WANT US 525 00:23:36,800 --> 00:23:38,320 TO BE ALONE AND UNHAPPY. 526 00:23:38,320 --> 00:23:40,840 DO YOU? 527 00:24:04,200 --> 00:24:05,480 TONIGHT'S THE NIGHT, ARIEL. 528 00:24:05,520 --> 00:24:07,360 WE VISIT KATHY AND HER CHILDREN 529 00:24:07,360 --> 00:24:08,720 AT THEIR HOME. 530 00:24:08,800 --> 00:24:10,720 YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE A WONDERFUL TIME. 531 00:24:10,800 --> 00:24:11,680 I GUARANTEE IT. 532 00:24:11,680 --> 00:24:14,400 BUT I DIDN'T HAVE A WONDERFUL TIME, DIARY. 533 00:24:14,440 --> 00:24:17,000 IN FACT, THE EVENING WAS A HIDEOUS TORTURE 534 00:24:17,040 --> 00:24:19,200 RIGHT FROM THE VERY START. 535 00:24:21,160 --> 00:24:23,960 I FEAR THE WIND. 536 00:24:25,560 --> 00:24:26,600 OK. 537 00:24:26,640 --> 00:24:29,200 WELL, IT'S PRETTY MUCH STOPPED, 538 00:24:29,200 --> 00:24:31,960 SO, LIKE, YOU WANT TO COME OUT? 539 00:24:33,960 --> 00:24:38,400 NO, NO. OH, NO! OH, NO! I'M... 540 00:24:41,320 --> 00:24:43,200 [RUFF RUFF] 541 00:24:43,240 --> 00:24:43,800 [RUFF] 542 00:24:43,840 --> 00:24:47,440 DON'T THREATEN ME, MONSTER. 543 00:24:47,480 --> 00:24:48,720 HE'S JUST BARKING. 544 00:24:48,720 --> 00:24:50,280 SILENCE, BEAST. 545 00:24:50,320 --> 00:24:51,000 [WHIMPERS] 546 00:24:51,040 --> 00:24:53,160 YOUR VOICE IS LOUD AND VULGAR. 547 00:24:53,200 --> 00:24:54,080 [TOY GUN BEEPS] 548 00:24:54,080 --> 00:24:56,560 YOU'RE AN ALIEN, TOO, AREN'T YOU? 549 00:24:56,560 --> 00:24:58,920 [BREATHES HEAVILY] 550 00:24:58,920 --> 00:25:01,720 I NEED WATER. 551 00:25:08,000 --> 00:25:10,160 IS SHE ALL RIGHT, COS? 552 00:25:10,200 --> 00:25:13,040 SHE'S JUST NERVOUS. 553 00:25:13,080 --> 00:25:15,760 CAN YOU GO AND CHECK ON HER, MEG? 554 00:25:15,760 --> 00:25:18,720 SURE. WHY NOT? 555 00:25:19,680 --> 00:25:21,680 [WATER RUNNING] 556 00:25:21,720 --> 00:25:23,160 [SINK TURNS OFF] 557 00:25:23,200 --> 00:25:26,680 ARIEL, ARE YOU OK? 558 00:25:34,600 --> 00:25:36,560 YOU'RE ALL WET. 559 00:25:38,280 --> 00:25:40,880 I FELL IN THE SINK. 560 00:25:40,920 --> 00:25:43,080 IN THE SINK? 561 00:25:44,480 --> 00:25:46,960 DO YOU WANT TO DRY OFF? 562 00:25:56,120 --> 00:25:59,720 YOUR ROOM IS HIDEOUSLY CLUTTERED. 563 00:25:59,760 --> 00:26:01,280 THANK YOU. 564 00:26:01,320 --> 00:26:03,480 YOU CAN WEAR THESE. 565 00:26:06,160 --> 00:26:08,480 THEY'RE FAR TOO LARGE. 566 00:26:10,160 --> 00:26:11,080 YOU CAN WEAR HERS 567 00:26:11,120 --> 00:26:15,400 IF YOU THINK THAT THEY WOULD FIT YOU BETTER. 568 00:26:17,160 --> 00:26:19,160 I WILL ENDURE THOSE. 569 00:26:27,840 --> 00:26:31,720 DID YOU JUST DRINK THAT WHOLE BOTTLE? 570 00:26:31,760 --> 00:26:32,800 [ALIEN VOICE] NO. 571 00:26:32,840 --> 00:26:33,560 YES, YOU DID. 572 00:26:33,600 --> 00:26:35,000 WHY IS YOUR VOICE LIKE THAT? 573 00:26:35,000 --> 00:26:37,200 ARE YOU TRYING TO BE FUNNY OR SOMETHING? 574 00:26:37,280 --> 00:26:39,400 YES, I'M TRYING TO BE FUNNY. 575 00:26:39,440 --> 00:26:40,440 HA HA HA HA HA. 576 00:26:40,480 --> 00:26:42,600 HA...HA. AHEM. 577 00:26:42,640 --> 00:26:45,240 [NORMAL VOICE] I AM FUNNY. 578 00:26:45,280 --> 00:26:46,600 YOU'RE FREAKING ME OUT. 579 00:26:46,640 --> 00:26:48,040 [HAIR DRYER STARTS] HERE, USE THIS. 580 00:26:48,040 --> 00:26:49,120 STOP THE WIND. STOP THE WIND! 581 00:26:49,160 --> 00:26:51,280 [HAIR DRYER STOPS] YOU ARE INCREDIBLY NEUROTIC 582 00:26:51,320 --> 00:26:53,760 ABOUT YOUR HAIR, YOU KNOW THAT? 583 00:26:55,200 --> 00:26:56,640 EVERYTHING OK BACK HERE? 584 00:26:56,720 --> 00:26:59,800 EVERYTHING IS VERY OK, KATHY LARSON, THANK YOU. 585 00:26:59,840 --> 00:27:02,120 GREAT. DINNER'S READY 586 00:27:03,440 --> 00:27:05,040 SHE SEEMS NICE, DOESN'T SHE? 587 00:27:05,040 --> 00:27:07,360 I'LL TAKE THE FIFTH. 588 00:27:30,320 --> 00:27:32,000 I LOVE FOOD. 589 00:27:32,040 --> 00:27:33,360 ME, TOO! 590 00:27:33,400 --> 00:27:36,600 DON'T YOU LIKE HOT DOGS, ARIEL? 591 00:27:36,640 --> 00:27:38,880 I DO NOT LIKE FOOD. 592 00:27:38,920 --> 00:27:40,520 NOTHING? 593 00:27:40,560 --> 00:27:41,760 GRILLED CHEESE... 594 00:27:41,760 --> 00:27:43,160 P.B. AND J... 595 00:27:43,200 --> 00:27:45,600 PASTA? 596 00:27:47,080 --> 00:27:48,200 FOOD IS MESSY. 597 00:27:48,240 --> 00:27:51,880 YEAH, MOM, UM, ARIEL'S ON THAT NEW ROOT BEER DIET. 598 00:27:51,920 --> 00:27:53,160 AT THAT MOMENT, DIARY, 599 00:27:53,200 --> 00:27:55,680 I KNEW THAT THE CREATURE CALLED MEGAN LARSON 600 00:27:55,720 --> 00:27:57,480 WAS TO BE FEARED AND DESPISED. 601 00:27:57,520 --> 00:27:59,480 AT LEAST I WAS PREPARED FOR HER NOW. 602 00:27:59,520 --> 00:28:01,120 WHAT HAPPENED NEXT, HOWEVER, 603 00:28:01,200 --> 00:28:03,760 WAS A SHOCKING AND GHASTLY SURPRISE. 604 00:28:03,760 --> 00:28:04,760 Cosmo: KIDS. 605 00:28:04,760 --> 00:28:06,880 KATHY AND I HAVE SOMETHING WE'D LIKE TO TELL YOU. 606 00:28:06,920 --> 00:28:09,360 MEGAN...TREV... 607 00:28:09,400 --> 00:28:10,520 ARIEL... 608 00:28:10,560 --> 00:28:14,200 COSMO AND I KNOW WE BOTH COME FROM VERY DIFFERENT WORLDS. 609 00:28:14,240 --> 00:28:15,520 AND THAT WE HAVEN'T KNOWN EACH OTHER 610 00:28:15,560 --> 00:28:16,400 FOR VERY LONG. 611 00:28:16,440 --> 00:28:17,960 AND, WELL, YOU CAN ALSO UNDERSTAND 612 00:28:17,960 --> 00:28:21,120 THAT, WELL, THIS DINNER HASN'T GONE 613 00:28:21,120 --> 00:28:23,280 EXACTLY AS SMOOTHLY 614 00:28:23,280 --> 00:28:24,800 AS WE WOULD HAVE ALL LIKED. 615 00:28:24,800 --> 00:28:26,240 BUT WHEN 2 BEINGS-- 616 00:28:26,280 --> 00:28:29,280 UH, PEOPLE FEEL ABOUT EACH OTHER 617 00:28:29,280 --> 00:28:30,120 THE WAY WE DO... 618 00:28:30,160 --> 00:28:32,400 WELL, WE JUST HAVE TO FOLLOW OUR HEARTS, 619 00:28:32,480 --> 00:28:37,240 AND EVEN THOUGH THIS MIGHT SEEM REALLY SUDDEN... 620 00:28:40,240 --> 00:28:43,120 CONGRATULATE US, KIDS. WE'RE ENGAGED. 621 00:28:46,560 --> 00:28:48,680 DO YOU WANT TO SAY ANYTHING, MEGAN? 622 00:28:48,720 --> 00:28:52,200 I WAS SPEECHLESS WHEN MOM ASKED ME THAT, 623 00:28:52,240 --> 00:28:53,680 BUT, DIARY, 624 00:28:53,720 --> 00:28:56,040 I DEFINITELY WASN'T SPEECHLESS LATER. 625 00:28:56,080 --> 00:28:58,720 MOTHER, HE IS THE FREAK OF ALL TIME. 626 00:28:58,800 --> 00:28:59,840 OH, MEGAN. 627 00:28:59,840 --> 00:29:00,720 HE IS. 628 00:29:00,800 --> 00:29:03,320 HE'S LOUD AND BIZARRE, AND HE DRESSES WEIRD. 629 00:29:03,320 --> 00:29:05,200 IT'S LIKE HE'S SOME INSANE CLOWN 630 00:29:05,240 --> 00:29:06,440 OR SOMETHING. 631 00:29:06,480 --> 00:29:07,280 I LIKE HIM. 632 00:29:07,320 --> 00:29:08,320 I'M PRETTY SURE HE'S AN ALIEN, 633 00:29:08,320 --> 00:29:09,880 BUT I THINK HE'S A GOOD ONE. 634 00:29:09,920 --> 00:29:11,680 HE CAN SHARE MY ROOM IF HE WANTS. 635 00:29:11,680 --> 00:29:13,720 HE'S NOT GONNA BE YOUR NEW PLAYMATE, TREV. 636 00:29:13,760 --> 00:29:15,480 HE'S GONNA BE YOUR NEW FATHER. 637 00:29:15,520 --> 00:29:16,320 STEPFATHER, MEGAN, 638 00:29:16,320 --> 00:29:18,440 AND ARIEL WILL BE YOUR STEPSISTER. 639 00:29:18,480 --> 00:29:20,400 LET'S NOT EVEN GO THERE. 640 00:29:20,440 --> 00:29:21,760 ARIEL'S NICE. 641 00:29:21,800 --> 00:29:23,320 SHE'S WHACKED, MOTHER! 642 00:29:23,360 --> 00:29:25,120 I FELL IN THE SINK?! 643 00:29:25,200 --> 00:29:26,280 WELL, MAYBE SHE MEANT THE BATH. 644 00:29:26,320 --> 00:29:28,640 OH, AND THAT THING WITH THE HAIR DRYER. 645 00:29:28,680 --> 00:29:29,560 WHAT WAS THAT? 646 00:29:29,600 --> 00:29:31,560 I THINK SHE'S PRETTY. 647 00:29:31,600 --> 00:29:32,800 YEAH, WELL, YOU'RE 7, TREV. 648 00:29:32,840 --> 00:29:35,360 YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING. 649 00:29:36,200 --> 00:29:38,080 OH, AND THE AFFECTED WAY SHE TALKS. 650 00:29:38,120 --> 00:29:40,280 [MOCKING] OH, HORROR! OH, MISERY! 651 00:29:40,320 --> 00:29:42,800 IT'S LIKE SHE'S IN SOME BAD PLAY. 652 00:29:42,840 --> 00:29:44,160 I THINK YOU'RE BEING SILLY. 653 00:29:44,200 --> 00:29:46,360 NO, NO, NO, I THINK I'M BEING SMART. 654 00:29:46,360 --> 00:29:48,840 MOM, YOU'RE BEING SILLY. 655 00:29:48,880 --> 00:29:51,120 MEG, I WOULD NEVER MARRY ANYONE 656 00:29:51,160 --> 00:29:53,200 THAT YOU ABSOLUTELY HATED, 657 00:29:53,200 --> 00:29:54,560 BUT I GOT TO TELL YOU, 658 00:29:54,560 --> 00:29:57,480 COS AND I ARE VERY HAPPY TOGETHER. 659 00:29:57,520 --> 00:30:00,560 I THINK THIS MIGHT BE THE REAL THING, 660 00:30:00,560 --> 00:30:03,520 SO I WISH YOU'D AT LEAST GIVE HIM A CHANCE, 661 00:30:03,560 --> 00:30:05,720 AND TRY TO GET ALONG WITH ARIEL, TOO. 662 00:30:05,720 --> 00:30:07,360 MOM, I TRIED. 663 00:30:07,400 --> 00:30:08,840 SHE IS SCARY. 664 00:30:08,880 --> 00:30:11,600 WELL, I HEAR SHE LIKES TO SING. 665 00:30:11,640 --> 00:30:15,360 MAYBE YOU COULD MAKE MUSIC TOGETHER. 666 00:30:15,400 --> 00:30:17,520 FINE. FORGET THAT. 667 00:30:17,560 --> 00:30:19,640 ARIEL'S IN A NEW PLACE, MEGAN. 668 00:30:19,680 --> 00:30:21,880 SHE'S A LONG WAY FROM HOME-- 669 00:30:21,920 --> 00:30:24,400 MILLIONS OF LIGHT YEARS, PROBABLY. 670 00:30:24,400 --> 00:30:27,560 TREV! UH-UH. 671 00:30:30,720 --> 00:30:32,960 SHE LOST HER MOM A FEW YEARS BACK, 672 00:30:33,000 --> 00:30:34,160 DID YOU KNOW THAT? 673 00:30:34,200 --> 00:30:36,320 SHE DID? 674 00:30:36,360 --> 00:30:38,120 SO FAR FROM HOME, 675 00:30:38,160 --> 00:30:39,880 SHE HASN'T HAD IT EASY. 676 00:30:39,920 --> 00:30:42,560 GIVE HER A BREAK, HUH, MEG? 677 00:30:45,360 --> 00:30:46,880 GREAT. 678 00:30:47,840 --> 00:30:50,880 SHE STARTS SCHOOL WITH YOU TOMORROW. 679 00:31:01,040 --> 00:31:02,560 DIDN'T YOU HAVE BIKES IN THE YUKON? 680 00:31:02,600 --> 00:31:06,280 OF COURSE. I AM SIMPLY OUT OF PRACTICE. 681 00:31:31,080 --> 00:31:32,000 Crowd: OH! 682 00:31:32,040 --> 00:31:34,440 Megan: DEAR DIARY, CAN YOU SPELL "MORTIFYING?" 683 00:31:34,480 --> 00:31:36,400 I JUST KNEW WHAT EVERYBODY WAS THINKING: 684 00:31:36,440 --> 00:31:39,480 "WHO'S THAT DWEEB WITH MEGAN? IS THAT MEGAN'S FRIEND? 685 00:31:39,480 --> 00:31:42,560 AND IF SO, MEGAN MUST BE A DWEEB, TOO." 686 00:31:42,600 --> 00:31:44,720 BUT THEN THE WEIRDEST THING HAPPENED. 687 00:31:44,800 --> 00:31:47,080 CAN'T YOU MAKE YOURSELF TURN INVISIBLE? 688 00:31:47,120 --> 00:31:49,280 POSSIBLY. SHOULD I TRY? 689 00:31:49,320 --> 00:31:51,200 TOO LATE. 690 00:31:51,240 --> 00:31:51,920 HEY, GUYS. 691 00:31:51,960 --> 00:31:53,520 HEY, MEGAN. WHO'S YOUR FRIEND? 692 00:31:53,600 --> 00:31:54,800 UM, THIS IS ARIEL. 693 00:31:54,840 --> 00:31:57,840 SHE'S NOT REALLY MY FRIEND. 694 00:31:58,600 --> 00:32:01,200 HOW DO YOU GUYS KNOW EACH OTHER? 695 00:32:01,240 --> 00:32:02,120 THROUGH OUR PARENTS. 696 00:32:02,160 --> 00:32:03,920 ARIEL'S FROM THE YUKON. 697 00:32:03,960 --> 00:32:07,120 OH, THE YUKON. COOL! 698 00:32:07,160 --> 00:32:08,400 SO, LIKE, ARIEL, 699 00:32:08,440 --> 00:32:09,960 DO YOU LIKE SKIING? 700 00:32:10,000 --> 00:32:11,800 I LIKE BUBBLES, AND I LIKE GAS, 701 00:32:11,840 --> 00:32:13,520 AND I AM CALMED BY WATER. 702 00:32:13,520 --> 00:32:14,320 Matt: COOL. 703 00:32:14,360 --> 00:32:16,280 CAN'T ARGUE WITH ANY OF THOSE. 704 00:32:16,320 --> 00:32:18,960 I DON'T GET THIS. 705 00:32:19,040 --> 00:32:19,720 [BELL RINGS] 706 00:32:19,760 --> 00:32:22,280 HELLO, IT'S 'CAUSE SHE'S GORGEOUS. 707 00:32:24,480 --> 00:32:25,360 SHE IS NOT! 708 00:32:25,360 --> 00:32:27,280 JUST BECAUSE YOU DON'T WANT HER TO BE 709 00:32:27,320 --> 00:32:30,040 DOESN'T MEAN SHE ISN'T, MEGAN. 710 00:32:30,320 --> 00:32:32,280 I'D HATE TO HAVE HER FOR A STEPSISTER. 711 00:32:32,320 --> 00:32:35,280 YOU MUST FEEL SO INFERIOR. 712 00:32:35,320 --> 00:32:37,600 INFERIOR? TO HER? 713 00:32:37,640 --> 00:32:39,160 SHE'S A TOTAL PSYCHO! 714 00:32:39,200 --> 00:32:40,960 SHE CAN'T EVEN RIDE A BIKE 715 00:32:41,000 --> 00:32:42,640 WITH TRAINING WHEELS. 716 00:32:42,680 --> 00:32:47,000 MAYBE SHE DOESN'T WANT TO. MAYBE SHE'S BEING SUBVERSIVE. 717 00:32:47,040 --> 00:32:48,480 MIKEY, SHE FELL ON HER FACE. 718 00:32:48,520 --> 00:32:50,600 HOW IS THAT BEING SUBVERSIVE? 719 00:32:50,640 --> 00:32:52,120 THE WAY SHE DRESSES. 720 00:32:52,160 --> 00:32:54,240 IT'S SO ORIGINAL, SO FRESH. 721 00:32:54,240 --> 00:32:55,240 THAT IS NOT ORIGINAL. 722 00:32:55,240 --> 00:32:58,280 MY AUNT INA'S BEEN DRESSING LIKE THAT FOR YEARS. 723 00:32:58,320 --> 00:32:59,880 AND I'LL TELL YOU ONE THING. 724 00:32:59,880 --> 00:33:01,680 CUTTER WON'T THINK SHE'S COOL. 725 00:33:01,720 --> 00:33:02,960 CUTTER THINKS I'M COOL. 726 00:33:03,040 --> 00:33:08,320 MEGAN, AS YOUR FRIEND, THAT'S REALLY PATHETIC. 727 00:33:08,800 --> 00:33:11,200 I'M GONNA GO TALK TO HER. 728 00:33:11,240 --> 00:33:12,080 WHY? 729 00:33:12,080 --> 00:33:15,560 I THINK SHE MIGHT BE, LIKE, A VISIONARY. 730 00:33:16,160 --> 00:33:19,240 SO, ARIEL, HOW COME YOU WEAR SO MANY LAYERS? 731 00:33:19,240 --> 00:33:21,520 I'M TRYING TO PROTECT MY ESSENCE. 732 00:33:21,600 --> 00:33:23,160 THAT'S INTENSE! 733 00:33:23,200 --> 00:33:24,600 I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS! 734 00:33:24,600 --> 00:33:26,400 Matt: ...ESSENCES UNPROTECTED SOMETIMES. 735 00:33:26,400 --> 00:33:29,080 [BELL RINGS] 736 00:33:31,080 --> 00:33:35,400 AND WHAT IS THE VOLUME OF THE SWIMMING POOL? 737 00:33:35,440 --> 00:33:36,680 Mr. Singh: MEGAN? 738 00:33:36,720 --> 00:33:37,320 HUH? 739 00:33:37,360 --> 00:33:40,320 THE VOLUME OF THE POOL. 740 00:33:40,360 --> 00:33:42,840 OH, UH... 741 00:33:43,440 --> 00:33:45,440 MEDIUM? 742 00:33:45,440 --> 00:33:48,600 CAN ANYONE ELSE ANSWER THE QUESTION? 743 00:33:51,040 --> 00:33:51,840 ARIEL. 744 00:33:51,880 --> 00:33:53,880 I ASSUME THAT YOU WISH ME TO VISUALIZE 745 00:33:53,920 --> 00:33:56,480 THE TRAPEZOIDAL SIDE OF THE POOL AS THE BASE, MR. SINGH? 746 00:33:56,520 --> 00:33:57,240 UH... 747 00:33:57,280 --> 00:33:58,280 I ASSUME ALSO THAT 748 00:33:58,280 --> 00:33:59,720 THE DEPTH OF THE POOL IS TO BE MEASURED IN METERS 749 00:33:59,760 --> 00:34:01,960 AND THE FLUID VOLUME TO BE MEASURED IN KILOLITERS. 750 00:34:02,000 --> 00:34:02,920 WELL... 751 00:34:02,960 --> 00:34:04,640 ASSUMING THAT THESE THINGS ARE THE CASE, 752 00:34:04,640 --> 00:34:05,520 AND THE WATER TEMPERATURE 753 00:34:05,560 --> 00:34:07,920 IS NO HIGHER THAN 32 DEGREES CENTIGRADE, 754 00:34:07,960 --> 00:34:12,120 THEN THE ANSWER IS 13.34 KILOLITERS. 755 00:34:12,120 --> 00:34:13,280 Mr. Singh: THAT IS CORRECT. 756 00:34:13,280 --> 00:34:17,880 ARIEL IS THE FULL-ON GOOD WILL HUNTING. 757 00:34:20,240 --> 00:34:23,040 I HEAR HER IQ IS, LIKE, 300. 758 00:34:23,040 --> 00:34:25,160 I HEAR SHE DATED PRINCE WILLIAM. 759 00:34:25,160 --> 00:34:27,400 WELL, I HEAR SHE TUTORED BILL GATES. 760 00:34:27,440 --> 00:34:29,280 THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND, MICHELLE. 761 00:34:29,320 --> 00:34:31,720 ARIEL IS NOT ANY OF THOSE THINGS. 762 00:34:31,760 --> 00:34:33,240 SHE'S LIKE... 763 00:34:33,280 --> 00:34:35,120 AN ALIEN FROM ANOTHER PLANET. 764 00:34:35,160 --> 00:34:37,280 YEAH, FROM THE PLANET RAD. 765 00:34:37,320 --> 00:34:40,320 NO, FROM THE PLANET WEIRD. 766 00:34:40,320 --> 00:34:42,560 SHE FEARS WIND, MICHELLE. 767 00:34:42,640 --> 00:34:45,120 WELL, WIND IS SCARY... 768 00:34:45,160 --> 00:34:45,920 IN A WAY. 769 00:34:45,960 --> 00:34:49,120 I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU JUST SAID THAT. 770 00:34:49,160 --> 00:34:51,240 UNBELIEVABLE! HER FIRST DAY, 771 00:34:51,280 --> 00:34:54,600 AND SHE'S ALREADY SITTING AT THE POPULAR TABLE. 772 00:34:54,640 --> 00:34:56,240 Heather: MEGAN! 773 00:34:56,240 --> 00:34:57,280 MEGAN! 774 00:34:57,320 --> 00:35:00,240 HEATHER HARTMAN'S CALLING YOU. 775 00:35:00,280 --> 00:35:01,800 GO. 776 00:35:02,280 --> 00:35:03,800 GO! 777 00:35:04,840 --> 00:35:07,560 I LOVE THE WAY YOU PROTECT YOUR ESSENCE, ARIEL. 778 00:35:07,600 --> 00:35:08,520 DEFINITELY. 779 00:35:08,520 --> 00:35:10,760 AND YOU TOTALLY TORE THE COVER OFF HOW, LIKE, 780 00:35:10,800 --> 00:35:12,480 MUNDANE BIKE RIDING IS. 781 00:35:12,520 --> 00:35:15,640 ARIEL SAYS YOU TWO ARE GONNA BE STEPSISTERS, MEGAN. 782 00:35:15,680 --> 00:35:18,240 WELL, THAT'S NOT REALLY A SURE THING, HEATHER. 783 00:35:18,280 --> 00:35:20,320 YOU ARE SO LUCKY. 784 00:35:20,360 --> 00:35:24,160 I JUST THINK THAT ARIEL IS SUCH THE TOTAL PACKAGE. 785 00:35:24,200 --> 00:35:27,160 SHE'S WISE AND DEEP AND MATURE. 786 00:35:27,200 --> 00:35:31,360 PLUS, SHE HAS INCREDIBLY STRONG HAIR. 787 00:35:32,000 --> 00:35:34,960 DO YOU KNOW WHAT KIND OF CONDITIONER SHE USES, MEGAN? 788 00:35:35,000 --> 00:35:37,720 AS FAR AS I KNOW, SHE JUST FALLS IN THE SINK. 789 00:35:37,720 --> 00:35:42,400 FALLS IN THE SINK. I SHOULD TRY THAT. 790 00:35:42,640 --> 00:35:46,640 YOU CAN SIT AT OUR TABLE TOMORROW, TOO, MEGAN... 791 00:35:46,680 --> 00:35:49,200 IF YOU WANT. 792 00:35:49,240 --> 00:35:51,400 THANKS, YOUR MAJESTY. 793 00:35:51,400 --> 00:35:54,040 WONDER IF THERE ARE ANY SINKS AROUND HERE 794 00:35:54,080 --> 00:35:56,160 I COULD FALL INTO. 795 00:35:56,200 --> 00:35:59,480 YOU ARE SUCH A REVOLUTIONARY! 796 00:36:00,720 --> 00:36:03,720 THIS IS NAUSEATING. 797 00:36:11,000 --> 00:36:15,280 SHE'S, LIKE, TOTALLY CHANNELING ALFRED EINSTEIN. 798 00:36:15,360 --> 00:36:16,840 IT'S ALBERT. 799 00:36:16,880 --> 00:36:19,360 CHILL, MEGAN. 800 00:36:19,760 --> 00:36:22,240 ♪ OH-OH-OH ♪ 801 00:36:22,280 --> 00:36:27,920 ♪ ZIRCALON ♪ 802 00:36:27,920 --> 00:36:29,640 ♪ OH-OH-OH ♪ 803 00:36:29,680 --> 00:36:31,080 THIS IS LAME! 804 00:36:31,120 --> 00:36:34,680 ♪ OH-OH-OH ♪ 805 00:36:34,720 --> 00:36:37,120 [BELL RINGS] 806 00:36:57,240 --> 00:36:58,760 OH, FANUL. 807 00:36:58,800 --> 00:37:01,280 HOW I MISS YOU, MY DARLING FANUL. 808 00:37:01,320 --> 00:37:05,280 ARE YOU TALKING TO THAT BUBBLE, ARIEL? 809 00:37:05,320 --> 00:37:09,240 THAT BUBBLE, AS YOU SO PATRONIZINGLY CALL IT, 810 00:37:09,280 --> 00:37:12,000 IS THE LOVE OF MY LIFE! 811 00:37:14,960 --> 00:37:17,320 WHAT A POET SHE IS. 812 00:37:17,320 --> 00:37:19,200 SHE IS NOT A POET! 813 00:37:19,240 --> 00:37:21,480 SHE'S POSSESSED! 814 00:37:22,080 --> 00:37:24,200 [SIGHS] YEAH, I KNOW. 815 00:37:24,240 --> 00:37:26,160 GET TO CLASS. 816 00:37:26,160 --> 00:37:29,280 Girl: MY ESSENCE IS SO FRAGILE! 817 00:37:29,320 --> 00:37:32,120 [STUDENTS CHATTERING] 818 00:37:34,160 --> 00:37:37,840 Megan: IT WAS BECOMING A NIGHTMARE OF BIBLICAL PROPORTIONS, DIARY. 819 00:37:37,840 --> 00:37:40,440 BY SEVENTH PERIOD, ARIEL COULD'VE SET HER HAIR ON FIRE 820 00:37:40,480 --> 00:37:42,240 AND RUN AROUND FLAPPING HER ARMS LIKE A CHICKEN, 821 00:37:42,320 --> 00:37:45,320 AND PEOPLE WOULD'VE THOUGHT IT WAS COOL. 822 00:37:45,360 --> 00:37:47,120 ACTUALLY, THAT WOULD'VE BEEN KINDA COOL, 823 00:37:47,200 --> 00:37:49,360 BUT YOU GET THE IDEA, DIARY. 824 00:37:49,360 --> 00:37:51,240 [SIGHS] BUT THE WORST PART WAS 825 00:37:51,280 --> 00:37:53,360 THAT THE WORST PART WAS YET TO COME. 826 00:37:53,360 --> 00:37:56,200 MOM, I DON'T WANT TO TEACH ARIEL HOW TO WINDSURF. 827 00:37:56,200 --> 00:37:58,160 IT'S SOMETHING YOU GUYS CAN SHARE, MEGAN. 828 00:37:58,200 --> 00:37:59,720 I DON'T WANT TO SHARE WITH HER. 829 00:37:59,760 --> 00:38:00,640 MEGAN! MOM! 830 00:38:00,680 --> 00:38:02,200 MEGAN! MOM! 831 00:38:02,200 --> 00:38:03,040 MEGAN! 832 00:38:03,080 --> 00:38:05,080 THIS COULD GO ON FOR HOURS, YOU KNOW. 833 00:38:05,120 --> 00:38:07,320 CAN'T YOU TRY A BIT MORE, HONEY? 834 00:38:07,360 --> 00:38:09,200 BUT, MOM, CUTTER MIGHT BE THERE. 835 00:38:09,200 --> 00:38:12,080 AND ARIEL--SHE'S TERRIFIED OF THE WIND. 836 00:38:12,120 --> 00:38:15,000 HOW'S SHE GONNA LEARN HOW TO WINDSURF? 837 00:38:15,040 --> 00:38:17,280 SHE JUST NEEDS TO GET PAST THAT. 838 00:38:17,320 --> 00:38:20,520 I DON'T THINK YOU'RE BEING VERY MATURE, MEG. 839 00:38:20,560 --> 00:38:22,560 I'M NOT? MOM, YOU'RE THE ONE 840 00:38:22,560 --> 00:38:24,120 WHO'S MARRYING A COMPLETE STRANGER. 841 00:38:24,160 --> 00:38:26,280 COS IS NOT A STRANGER, MEG. 842 00:38:26,320 --> 00:38:27,400 IN FACT, IN SOME WAYS, 843 00:38:27,400 --> 00:38:30,280 I FEEL I KNOW HIM BETTER THAN I'VE EVER KNOWN ANY MAN. 844 00:38:30,320 --> 00:38:33,040 DO YOU KNOW THE TERM "SOULMATES," HONEY? 845 00:38:33,040 --> 00:38:35,040 MOM. OK, I'LL MAKE YOU A DEAL. 846 00:38:35,080 --> 00:38:37,320 I PROMISE TO TAKE ARIEL OUT ON THE WATER 847 00:38:37,360 --> 00:38:40,560 IF YOU PROMISE NEVER TO USE THAT WORD AGAIN. 848 00:38:40,560 --> 00:38:43,000 DEAL. 849 00:38:43,520 --> 00:38:45,000 I'M JUST GONNA, LIKE, GO OUT THERE, 850 00:38:45,040 --> 00:38:48,360 AND YOU CAN COPY WHAT I DO AFTERWARD, OK? 851 00:38:49,240 --> 00:38:50,880 WHAT? 852 00:38:51,680 --> 00:38:52,840 I FEAR THE WIND. 853 00:38:52,880 --> 00:38:58,400 WELL, YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO GET PAST THAT. 854 00:39:13,600 --> 00:39:16,280 Megan: AND THEN IT HAPPENED. 855 00:39:19,760 --> 00:39:21,200 UNH! 856 00:39:21,240 --> 00:39:25,520 FROM THAT MOMENT ON, DIARY, IT WAS WAR. 857 00:39:36,800 --> 00:39:37,720 Ariel: DEAR DIARY, 858 00:39:37,760 --> 00:39:40,200 JUST WHEN I THOUGHT IT COULDN'T GET ANY WORSE, 859 00:39:40,240 --> 00:39:44,040 I LEARNED WHAT THE WORDS "HIGH SCHOOL" MEAN. 860 00:39:44,560 --> 00:39:47,040 CAN'T YOU MAKE YOURSELF TURN INVISIBLE? 861 00:39:47,080 --> 00:39:49,200 POSSIBLY. SHOULD I TRY? 862 00:39:49,280 --> 00:39:50,960 TOO LATE. 863 00:39:50,960 --> 00:39:51,720 HEY, GUYS. 864 00:39:51,760 --> 00:39:53,880 HEY, MEGAN, WHO'S YOUR FRIEND? 865 00:39:53,920 --> 00:39:55,400 UM, THIS IS ARIEL. 866 00:39:55,440 --> 00:39:58,000 SHE'S NOT REALLY MY FRIEND. 867 00:39:58,000 --> 00:40:00,280 Ariel: AT FEEDING TIME, I WAS INVITED TO SIT 868 00:40:00,320 --> 00:40:02,280 AT A CERTAIN TABLE WHICH SEEMS TO POSSESS 869 00:40:02,320 --> 00:40:04,200 GREAT IMPORTANCE TO THE HUMANS. 870 00:40:04,240 --> 00:40:06,120 AT THIS TABLE THE CONVERSATION 871 00:40:06,160 --> 00:40:08,240 WAS PATHETICALLY EMPTY AND MEANINGLESS. 872 00:40:08,280 --> 00:40:09,840 EVERYONE THINKS YOU'RE, LIKE, 873 00:40:09,840 --> 00:40:12,320 A TOTAL ENIGMA, ARIEL. 874 00:40:12,320 --> 00:40:15,240 BUT I KNOW WHAT YOU REALLY ARE. 875 00:40:15,280 --> 00:40:16,920 YOU DO? 876 00:40:16,960 --> 00:40:20,640 YOU'RE A MAJOR COSMETICS REPRESENTATIVE, RIGHT? 877 00:40:22,160 --> 00:40:23,120 MEGAN! 878 00:40:23,160 --> 00:40:24,080 MEGAN! 879 00:40:24,120 --> 00:40:26,880 I LOVE THE WAY YOU PROTECT YOUR ESSENCE, ARIEL. 880 00:40:26,920 --> 00:40:27,840 DEFINITELY. 881 00:40:27,840 --> 00:40:30,040 AND YOU TOTALLY TORE THE COVER OFF HOW, LIKE, 882 00:40:30,080 --> 00:40:32,040 MUNDANE BIKE RIDING IS. 883 00:40:32,080 --> 00:40:35,360 ARIEL SAYS YOU TWO ARE GONNA BE STEPSISTERS, MEGAN. 884 00:40:35,360 --> 00:40:37,520 WELL, THAT'S NOT REALLY A SURE THING. 885 00:40:37,520 --> 00:40:38,840 YOU ARE SO LUCKY. 886 00:40:38,840 --> 00:40:43,680 I BET MEGAN IS SO JEALOUS OF YOU. 887 00:40:43,680 --> 00:40:46,080 I BET SHE WANTS TO BE JUST LIKE YOU. 888 00:40:46,120 --> 00:40:49,040 WHY WOULD ANYONE WANT THAT? 889 00:40:49,880 --> 00:40:52,160 [GIRLS GIGGLE] 890 00:40:52,800 --> 00:40:55,080 YOU'RE BOTH QUITE VACUOUS. 891 00:40:55,120 --> 00:40:56,320 HIDEOUS! 892 00:40:56,360 --> 00:40:57,280 MONSTROUS! 893 00:40:57,320 --> 00:41:00,200 [TOGETHER] THE YUKON RULES! 894 00:41:02,640 --> 00:41:04,680 [STUDENTS CHEERING] 895 00:41:06,560 --> 00:41:09,960 WHOO! THAT WAS COOL, MAN! 896 00:41:10,000 --> 00:41:13,200 YOU ARE SUCH A REVOLUTIONARY! 897 00:41:15,200 --> 00:41:19,200 WELL, YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO GET PAST THAT. 898 00:41:31,560 --> 00:41:35,360 Ariel: WHEN WE GOT TO THE BEACH THIS AFTERNOON, DIARY, 899 00:41:35,400 --> 00:41:36,760 I'D HAD ENOUGH. 900 00:41:36,760 --> 00:41:38,200 I WAS AFRAID FOR MYSELF, YES, 901 00:41:38,240 --> 00:41:41,840 BUT I WAS EVEN MORE FRIGHTENED FOR MEGAN LARSON. 902 00:41:41,880 --> 00:41:43,680 WOULD NOT THE WIND DESTROY HER? 903 00:41:43,720 --> 00:41:45,960 WATCHING HER BLOWN ABOUT ON THE WATER, 904 00:41:46,000 --> 00:41:50,240 I FELT MYSELF BEGIN TO FALL APART AGAIN. 905 00:42:05,080 --> 00:42:09,360 I WAS JUST ABOUT TO GO RESCUE MEGAN LARSON WHEN... 906 00:42:10,720 --> 00:42:11,640 HEY! 907 00:42:11,680 --> 00:42:14,080 ARIEL? 908 00:42:14,120 --> 00:42:16,640 I'M CUTTER. 909 00:42:23,600 --> 00:42:28,240 [CHUCKLES] DO YOU KNOW YOUR CLOTHES ARE WET? 910 00:42:28,280 --> 00:42:31,280 I INTENDED TO RESCUE MEGAN LARSON. 911 00:42:31,280 --> 00:42:34,320 OH. NO, SHE'S FINE. 912 00:42:34,720 --> 00:42:35,680 WHAT IS YOUR INTEREST 913 00:42:35,720 --> 00:42:39,360 IN THIS DISGUSTING BAG OF SKIN I INHABIT, CUTTER? 914 00:42:39,400 --> 00:42:40,640 WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, ARIEL. 915 00:42:40,640 --> 00:42:41,840 THAT IS WAY HARSH. 916 00:42:41,880 --> 00:42:45,360 I MEAN, I DON'T THINK IT'S DISGUSTING. 917 00:42:45,400 --> 00:42:48,480 I THINK IT'S VERY UN-DISGUSTING, IN FACT. 918 00:42:48,480 --> 00:42:52,520 THAT IS BECAUSE YOU INHABIT A BAG OF SKIN, TOO. 919 00:42:52,560 --> 00:42:54,240 OK, I GUESS I DO. 920 00:42:54,280 --> 00:42:55,400 WHAT'S THE ALTERNATIVE? 921 00:42:55,440 --> 00:42:57,760 I WISH TO BE GAS. 922 00:42:57,800 --> 00:43:00,320 PURE GAS. 923 00:43:00,320 --> 00:43:04,600 HEH, THAT'S ONE WEIRD AMBITION. 924 00:43:04,640 --> 00:43:06,600 SO, LIKE, UH... 925 00:43:07,520 --> 00:43:10,000 YOU WANT TO BE MY GIRLFRIEND? 926 00:43:10,000 --> 00:43:11,680 I FIND YOU VAPID AND SHALLOW, CUTTER. 927 00:43:11,680 --> 00:43:14,600 ALL RIGHT. HEY, MAYBE I AM THOSE THINGS. 928 00:43:14,640 --> 00:43:17,320 YOU KNOW, SHALLOW--DEFINITELY. 929 00:43:17,360 --> 00:43:20,240 VAPID--LOOK, I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS, 930 00:43:20,280 --> 00:43:22,400 BUT I'M SURE IF I DID I COULD BE THAT, TOO, 931 00:43:22,440 --> 00:43:24,240 YOU KNOW, BUT LISTEN, RIGHT, 932 00:43:24,280 --> 00:43:28,480 VAPID, SHALLOW PEOPLE HAVE FEELINGS, TOO, OK? 933 00:43:30,200 --> 00:43:31,560 CHECK IT OUT! IT'S A PARTY! 934 00:43:31,600 --> 00:43:33,880 HEY, MEGAN, HOW WAS YOUR RIDE? 935 00:43:33,880 --> 00:43:36,840 FINE. COME ON, ARIEL. 936 00:43:36,880 --> 00:43:37,800 ARIEL! 937 00:43:37,840 --> 00:43:40,160 Ariel: AND NOW, DIARY, AS WE SAY ON ZIRCALON... 938 00:43:40,200 --> 00:43:43,000 BYE, MEGAN. THE CLAG REALLY HIT THE DRON. 939 00:43:43,040 --> 00:43:44,560 SEE YA, ARIEL. 940 00:43:44,880 --> 00:43:49,120 I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT I'M ONTO YOU, ARIEL. 941 00:43:49,160 --> 00:43:50,040 ONTO ME? 942 00:43:50,080 --> 00:43:51,840 YOU MAY THINK YOU'RE FOOLING EVERYBODY ELSE, 943 00:43:51,880 --> 00:43:53,440 BUT YOU ARE NOT FOOLING ME. 944 00:43:53,480 --> 00:43:55,680 I SEE EXACTLY WHAT YOU'RE DOING. 945 00:43:55,720 --> 00:43:57,360 I DO NOT UNDERSTAND. 946 00:43:57,400 --> 00:43:59,000 COMING HERE WITH YOUR ROOT BEER JONES 947 00:43:59,040 --> 00:44:00,360 AND YOUR AFFECTED WAY OF TALKING 948 00:44:00,400 --> 00:44:04,160 AND YOUR WHACKED SONGS AND JUST, LIKE, TAKING OVER. 949 00:44:04,200 --> 00:44:06,920 YOU MISAPPREHEND ME, EVIL MEGAN LARSON. 950 00:44:06,960 --> 00:44:11,160 NO. NO, I THINK I APPREHEND YOU VERY WELL, ARIEL COLA. 951 00:44:11,200 --> 00:44:13,720 YOU ARE LIKE THE TOTAL BAD SEED! 952 00:44:13,720 --> 00:44:15,560 WHY DO YOU WISH MY DESTRUCTION, 953 00:44:15,560 --> 00:44:18,360 EVIL MEGAN LARSON? WHY? 954 00:44:19,360 --> 00:44:20,560 BECAUSE... 955 00:44:20,560 --> 00:44:22,720 BECAUSE YOU HAVE COME IN, 956 00:44:22,760 --> 00:44:25,080 AND YOU'VE TAKEN EVERYTHING I WANT! 957 00:44:25,080 --> 00:44:27,080 WELL, FINE, HAVE IT. 958 00:44:27,080 --> 00:44:28,960 BUT LEAVE CUTTER ALONE. 959 00:44:29,000 --> 00:44:31,280 I DO NOT WANT CUTTER. 960 00:44:31,320 --> 00:44:32,480 I DO NOT WANT ANY OF IT. 961 00:44:32,520 --> 00:44:36,120 ALL I WANT IS TO GO HOME. 962 00:44:36,160 --> 00:44:36,880 WHAT? 963 00:44:36,920 --> 00:44:40,240 [SIGHS] I JUST WANT TO GO HOME. 964 00:44:40,280 --> 00:44:41,280 YOU DO? 965 00:44:41,280 --> 00:44:44,360 I WOULD GIVE ANYTHING TO LEAVE THIS HORRID PLACE, 966 00:44:44,400 --> 00:44:47,440 WITH ITS STRANGE CREATURES AND ITS SOLID OBJECTS 967 00:44:47,440 --> 00:44:48,720 AND ITS CALLOUS DISREGARD 968 00:44:48,760 --> 00:44:50,160 FOR THE NATURAL DIGNITY OF BUBBLES! 969 00:44:50,200 --> 00:44:54,200 YOU DON'T LIKE US BECAUSE WE'RE NOT NICE TO BUBBLES? 970 00:44:54,240 --> 00:44:57,400 I WISH ONLY TO GO HOME. 971 00:44:57,440 --> 00:44:59,520 TO SEE FANUL. 972 00:44:59,560 --> 00:45:00,720 TO BE GASEOUS. 973 00:45:00,800 --> 00:45:05,400 SO YOU DON'T WANT YOUR DAD TO MARRY MY MOM? 974 00:45:05,440 --> 00:45:06,320 OF COURSE NOT. 975 00:45:06,360 --> 00:45:07,800 Ariel: AND SO IN THAT MOMENT, DIARY, 976 00:45:07,800 --> 00:45:10,480 A STRANGE, UNHOLY ALLIANCE WAS BORN 977 00:45:10,560 --> 00:45:12,640 BETWEEN EVIL MEGAN LARSON AND I. 978 00:45:12,640 --> 00:45:15,640 WHEN DADDY AND KATHY LARSON WENT OUT THIS EVENING, 979 00:45:15,640 --> 00:45:17,960 EVIL MEGAN LARSON AND I VOLUNTEERED 980 00:45:17,960 --> 00:45:20,480 TO WATCH THE SMALL NOISEMAKER. 981 00:45:23,760 --> 00:45:26,240 [HONK HONK HONK] 982 00:45:26,920 --> 00:45:28,960 OK, TREV, TIME FOR BED. 983 00:45:28,960 --> 00:45:31,520 BUT, MEGAN, IT'S NOT EVEN 6:00 YET, 984 00:45:31,560 --> 00:45:34,480 AND I HAVEN'T EVEN HAD DINNER. 985 00:45:36,000 --> 00:45:37,240 BON APPETIT! 986 00:45:37,280 --> 00:45:38,560 AH. 987 00:45:38,600 --> 00:45:41,680 GOOD NIGHT. OH, TAKE ROKY WITH YOU. 988 00:45:41,760 --> 00:45:44,200 OK, THE FIRST THING WE HAVE TO DO 989 00:45:44,240 --> 00:45:45,160 IS CONVINCE OUR PARENTS 990 00:45:45,160 --> 00:45:46,360 THAT WE'RE THE BEST OF FRIENDS. 991 00:45:46,400 --> 00:45:48,240 I DO NOT UNDERSTAND, EVIL MEGAN LARSON. 992 00:45:48,280 --> 00:45:50,960 HOW COULD 2 CREATURES WHO DISLIKE EACH OTHER AS WE DO 993 00:45:51,000 --> 00:45:52,240 POSSIBLY CONVEY OTHERWISE? 994 00:45:52,280 --> 00:45:54,160 THERE'S THIS THING WE HAVE IN THE U.S. 995 00:45:54,160 --> 00:45:56,040 MAYBE YOU'VE HEARD OF IT, ARIEL. 996 00:45:56,080 --> 00:45:59,520 IT'S CALLED ACTING. 997 00:46:03,280 --> 00:46:05,920 Ariel: MEGAN LARSON REVEALED HERSELF THAT NIGHT 998 00:46:05,960 --> 00:46:08,000 AS A TRULY EVIL ARCHITECT. 999 00:46:08,000 --> 00:46:10,880 "ALL IS FAIR IN LOVE AND WAR," SHE SAID. 1000 00:46:10,920 --> 00:46:13,240 "SOMETIMES THE BUBBLE THAT SHIMMERS BRIGHTEST 1001 00:46:13,280 --> 00:46:15,640 ASCENDS THE SLOWEST," I RESPONDED. 1002 00:46:15,680 --> 00:46:17,680 ACTING! 1003 00:46:17,680 --> 00:46:19,000 SHE DID NOT UNDERSTAND THE REFERENCE. 1004 00:46:19,040 --> 00:46:20,400 ♪ IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪ 1005 00:46:20,440 --> 00:46:22,920 ♪ IT'S OK ♪ 1006 00:46:22,960 --> 00:46:27,120 ♪ IT'S ALL RIGHT JUST TO BE ME ♪ 1007 00:46:27,160 --> 00:46:29,440 ♪ IT'S SOLID OR GAS ♪ 1008 00:46:29,480 --> 00:46:32,120 ♪ LIQUID OR STONE ♪ 1009 00:46:32,160 --> 00:46:34,320 ♪ A FRIENDSHIP LIKE OURS ♪ 1010 00:46:34,360 --> 00:46:39,440 ♪ YOU'RE NEVER ALONE ♪ 1011 00:46:39,480 --> 00:46:41,480 [CHUCKLES] THAT ACTUALLY WASN'T BAD. 1012 00:46:41,520 --> 00:46:43,640 I'M SURPRISED TO SAY I LIKED IT AS WELL. 1013 00:46:43,680 --> 00:46:47,240 WE HAD AN EXTREMELY RAD TIME TOGETHER, DADDY, 1014 00:46:47,240 --> 00:46:48,480 AND NOW WE ARE THE BEST OF FRIENDS. 1015 00:46:48,520 --> 00:46:50,400 WE CAN'T WAIT TO BE STEPSISTERS, MOM. 1016 00:46:50,400 --> 00:46:52,880 PLEASE SAMPLE THESE EXTREME COOKIES WE MADE, DADDY. 1017 00:46:52,880 --> 00:46:55,280 AND NOW THAT ME AND ARIEL ARE SO CLOSE, 1018 00:46:55,320 --> 00:46:57,160 SHE TOLD ME THE SWEETEST THING. 1019 00:46:57,200 --> 00:46:59,000 COS THINKS THAT YOU'RE THE FUNNEST, 1020 00:46:59,040 --> 00:47:02,320 MOST REFRESHINGLY SIMPLE GIRL HE'S EVER MET, 1021 00:47:02,360 --> 00:47:04,240 AND ALL HE EVER TALKS ABOUT 1022 00:47:04,240 --> 00:47:05,920 IS HOW LIGHT, FRIVOLOUS, 1023 00:47:05,920 --> 00:47:07,600 AND INSUBSTANTIAL YOU ARE. 1024 00:47:07,680 --> 00:47:09,680 IN THE BEST SENSE, OF COURSE. 1025 00:47:09,720 --> 00:47:11,840 ISN'T THAT SWEET? 1026 00:47:11,880 --> 00:47:13,000 HA HA HA. 1027 00:47:13,040 --> 00:47:17,320 Ariel: AND SO, OUR EVIL PLAN BEGAN IN EARNEST. 1028 00:47:17,360 --> 00:47:18,760 RISOTTO, 1029 00:47:18,760 --> 00:47:20,320 ROASTED FENNEL, 1030 00:47:20,400 --> 00:47:21,800 AND WARM PEAR SALAD. 1031 00:47:21,840 --> 00:47:23,600 ENJOY! 1032 00:47:23,600 --> 00:47:26,360 [OPERA PLAYING] 1033 00:47:29,600 --> 00:47:31,640 Kathy: "AND HIS FLIGHT FROM HIAWATHA 1034 00:47:31,680 --> 00:47:34,440 "AND HIS WONDROUS TRANSMIGRATIONS 1035 00:47:34,440 --> 00:47:38,280 AND THE END OF HIS ADVENTURES." 1036 00:47:38,280 --> 00:47:41,240 NOW CHAPTER 16. [CLEARS THROAT] 1037 00:47:41,280 --> 00:47:43,160 "ON THE SHORES OF GITCHE GUMEE, 1038 00:47:43,200 --> 00:47:45,760 "ON THE DUNES OF NAGOW WUDJOO, 1039 00:47:45,760 --> 00:47:48,320 "BY THE SHINING BIG SEA WATER 1040 00:47:48,360 --> 00:47:52,240 "STOOD THE LODGE OF PAU-PUK-KEEWIS. 1041 00:47:52,280 --> 00:47:54,200 "IT WAS HE WHO IN HIS FRENZY 1042 00:47:54,240 --> 00:47:57,800 WHIRLED THESE DRIFTING SANDS--" 1043 00:47:57,800 --> 00:48:00,280 COSMO, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 1044 00:48:00,280 --> 00:48:02,320 IT'S A SPIDER ON THE WALL THERE. 1045 00:48:02,400 --> 00:48:04,480 BUT I'M JUST IN THE MIDDLE OF MY POEM. 1046 00:48:04,480 --> 00:48:07,080 BUT IT CAUGHT A BUG, KATHY, LOOK! 1047 00:48:07,120 --> 00:48:08,000 COSMO... 1048 00:48:08,040 --> 00:48:10,880 HEY! ALMOST TIME FOR HOLLYWOOD SQUARES! 1049 00:48:10,920 --> 00:48:12,640 PUMBAA, I THINK YOU'RE ONTO SOMETHING. 1050 00:48:12,640 --> 00:48:13,720 Pumbaa, farting: I AM? 1051 00:48:13,760 --> 00:48:15,480 Timon: I'LL SAY. BEING POPULAR 1052 00:48:15,480 --> 00:48:17,520 IS THE BEST REASON TO DO ANYTHING. 1053 00:48:17,560 --> 00:48:19,200 IF YOU BECOME AN ELEPHANT, 1054 00:48:19,240 --> 00:48:20,760 EVERYONE WOULD LOVE YOU, 1055 00:48:20,800 --> 00:48:22,320 THEN WE CAN BE-- 1056 00:48:22,320 --> 00:48:24,720 ARE YOU MAKING FUN OF ME, COS? 1057 00:48:24,800 --> 00:48:26,800 OF COURSE NOT, KATHY. 1058 00:48:26,800 --> 00:48:29,200 I MEAN, IF YOU THINK I'M SUCH AN AIRHEAD, 1059 00:48:29,240 --> 00:48:30,520 WHY DID YOU ASK ME TO MARRY YOU? 1060 00:48:30,560 --> 00:48:34,640 HOW CAN YOU ASK SUCH A QUESTION, KATHY? 1061 00:48:34,680 --> 00:48:37,440 I LOVE HOW FUN AND FREE YOU ARE, 1062 00:48:37,520 --> 00:48:39,560 AND I LIKE THE WAY YOU LOOK. 1063 00:48:39,600 --> 00:48:41,440 I'M FUN AND I'M FREE 1064 00:48:41,520 --> 00:48:42,760 AND I'M CUTE? 1065 00:48:42,800 --> 00:48:45,160 WHAT ABOUT MY MIND, COSMO? 1066 00:48:45,160 --> 00:48:47,280 I'VE NEVER SEEN YOUR MIND, KATHY. 1067 00:48:47,280 --> 00:48:51,080 THAT IS A VERY UNKIND THING TO SAY, COSMO COLA. 1068 00:48:51,120 --> 00:48:53,280 WHY ARE YOU ACTING LIKE THIS, KATHY? 1069 00:48:53,320 --> 00:48:54,320 LIKE WHAT? 1070 00:48:54,360 --> 00:48:56,400 LIKE THE SHRILL AND STRIDENT GUEST 1071 00:48:56,440 --> 00:48:57,600 ON A DAYTIME TV SHOW. 1072 00:48:57,640 --> 00:48:59,200 MAYBE IT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE ACTING LIKE 1073 00:48:59,200 --> 00:49:02,080 AN INCONSIDERATE SNOB, COSMO. 1074 00:49:02,120 --> 00:49:04,800 I HAD NO IDEA YOU COULD BE SUCH A TERMAGANT. 1075 00:49:04,880 --> 00:49:06,800 TERMA-WHAT? 1076 00:49:06,800 --> 00:49:09,240 TERMAGANT-- LOUD, OBNOXIOUS WOMAN. 1077 00:49:09,280 --> 00:49:12,800 THIS DATE IS OVER. 1078 00:49:13,520 --> 00:49:15,160 KATHY! 1079 00:49:15,520 --> 00:49:17,280 KATHY! 1080 00:49:17,720 --> 00:49:19,280 KATHY! 1081 00:49:24,560 --> 00:49:27,040 WHAT ARE YOU TWO DOING? 1082 00:49:29,720 --> 00:49:31,400 NOTHING. 1083 00:49:31,960 --> 00:49:35,480 Ariel: OF COURSE, AS MEGAN SAID, ONE FIGHT WAS NOT ENOUGH 1084 00:49:35,520 --> 00:49:38,960 TO END THE RELATIONSHIP ENTIRELY, DIARY. 1085 00:49:39,040 --> 00:49:42,720 THUS, THE NEXT MOVE WAS MINE. 1086 00:49:43,240 --> 00:49:44,200 AS YOU KNOW, DADDY, 1087 00:49:44,240 --> 00:49:46,640 MEGAN AND I ARE NOW THE BEST OF FRIENDS. 1088 00:49:46,680 --> 00:49:50,000 WE SO LONG TO BE STEPSISTERS. 1089 00:49:50,040 --> 00:49:51,120 AND IN THIS SPIRIT, 1090 00:49:51,160 --> 00:49:54,160 SHE HAS SHARED A CONFIDENCE WITH ME. 1091 00:49:55,560 --> 00:49:56,320 YES? 1092 00:49:56,360 --> 00:49:57,880 YOU SEE, DADDY, 1093 00:49:57,920 --> 00:50:00,120 KATHY ONLY ACTED THE WAY SHE DID 1094 00:50:00,160 --> 00:50:02,000 BECAUSE SHE WAS TESTING YOU, I TOLD HIM. 1095 00:50:02,040 --> 00:50:03,680 SHE KNOWS THAT YOU CAN BE FUN, 1096 00:50:03,720 --> 00:50:06,040 LIKE A BIG CAREFREE CHILD, BUT SHE NEEDS 1097 00:50:06,080 --> 00:50:09,080 TO KNOW THAT YOU CAN BE A REAL MAN, DADDY. 1098 00:50:09,080 --> 00:50:10,000 AND YOU'RE ONLY TELLING HIM THIS 1099 00:50:10,040 --> 00:50:12,480 'CAUSE YOU WANT THEM TO BE HAPPY, RIGHT? 1100 00:50:12,520 --> 00:50:13,360 MM-HMM. 1101 00:50:13,400 --> 00:50:17,000 PERFECT. LET'S GO SEE HOW IT'S WORKING. 1102 00:50:17,280 --> 00:50:19,320 YOU LOOK GREAT TONIGHT, LITTLE LADY. 1103 00:50:19,360 --> 00:50:21,640 WHY DO YOU KEEP CALLING ME "LITTLE LADY," COS? 1104 00:50:21,680 --> 00:50:25,360 DON'T YOU WORRY YOUR PRETTY LITTLE HEAD ABOUT THAT, MA'AM. 1105 00:50:25,400 --> 00:50:27,480 I'LL TAKE CARE OF EVERYTHING. 1106 00:50:27,520 --> 00:50:28,440 EXCEPT ON SUNDAYS, 1107 00:50:28,480 --> 00:50:31,280 WHEN I'LL BE WATCHING FOOTBALL ON TV ALL DAY. 1108 00:50:31,280 --> 00:50:33,520 WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 1109 00:50:33,560 --> 00:50:36,160 YOU LOOKING AT MY WOMAN, FELLA? 1110 00:50:36,200 --> 00:50:37,720 COS... 1111 00:50:37,760 --> 00:50:39,160 NO, SIR. 1112 00:50:39,200 --> 00:50:40,880 WELL, DON'T. 1113 00:50:40,920 --> 00:50:43,240 AND FETCH ME A STEAK, SON. 1114 00:50:43,280 --> 00:50:44,680 BIGGEST ONE YOU GOT. 1115 00:50:44,720 --> 00:50:46,280 RAW! 1116 00:50:46,280 --> 00:50:48,640 WE DON'T HAVE STEAK, SIR. 1117 00:50:48,640 --> 00:50:49,720 OH, YOU DON'T, DO YOU? 1118 00:50:49,760 --> 00:50:52,160 WELL, THIS IS A PIZZA PARLOR, SIR. 1119 00:50:52,200 --> 00:50:53,640 AHA! 1120 00:50:53,640 --> 00:50:54,520 WELL, UH... 1121 00:50:54,560 --> 00:50:58,240 WELL, BRING ME THE MANLIEST PIZZA YOU GOT! 1122 00:51:02,440 --> 00:51:05,240 AND PUT JELLY BEANS ON IT! 1123 00:51:06,240 --> 00:51:08,160 WHAT'S UP WITH MOM AND COS? 1124 00:51:08,160 --> 00:51:10,440 THEY'RE HAVING A GROWN-UP TALK. 1125 00:51:10,480 --> 00:51:13,040 HOW COME YOU GUYS LOOK SO HAPPY ABOUT IT? 1126 00:51:13,080 --> 00:51:16,120 [COINS JINGLING] GO PLAY GAMES, TREV. 1127 00:51:22,160 --> 00:51:23,680 AM I VERY STRONG, DUMMY? 1128 00:51:23,680 --> 00:51:26,680 [DUMMY VOICE] YES, VERY. 1129 00:51:28,240 --> 00:51:30,880 AM I DEPENDABLE, DUMMY? 1130 00:51:30,920 --> 00:51:33,360 ABSOLUTELY! 1131 00:51:34,680 --> 00:51:37,040 COME ON, LITTLE LADY. LET'S DANCE! 1132 00:51:37,080 --> 00:51:38,160 COSMO! 1133 00:51:38,160 --> 00:51:39,760 OH! OH! 1134 00:51:39,800 --> 00:51:41,120 Cosmo: EVER BEEN SWEPT OFF YOUR FEET 1135 00:51:41,120 --> 00:51:42,520 BY A MAN LIKE THIS BEFORE? 1136 00:51:42,520 --> 00:51:43,600 WHOO HOO! 1137 00:51:43,640 --> 00:51:45,280 COSMO! 1138 00:51:48,360 --> 00:51:51,840 HERE IN THE U.S. WE HAVE A LITTLE TERM, ARIEL-- 1139 00:51:51,840 --> 00:51:54,640 "MISSION ACCOMPLISHED." 1140 00:51:55,360 --> 00:51:59,800 IN THE YUKON, WE SAY, "GASEOUS MATTER EXPANDED." 1141 00:51:59,840 --> 00:52:02,000 RIGHT. UH, WELL... 1142 00:52:02,040 --> 00:52:04,560 GASEOUS MATTER EXPANDED, THEN. 1143 00:52:04,560 --> 00:52:05,520 YOUR PLAN WAS WISE, MEGAN. 1144 00:52:05,520 --> 00:52:09,160 I COULDN'T HAVE DONE IT WITHOUT YOU, ARIEL. 1145 00:52:09,200 --> 00:52:11,760 MAYBE I DID MISAPPREHEND YOU. 1146 00:52:11,800 --> 00:52:13,920 THE WHOLE CUTTER THING NOTWITHSTANDING. 1147 00:52:13,960 --> 00:52:17,720 MAYBE I MISAPPREHENDED YOU AS WELL. 1148 00:52:18,400 --> 00:52:20,240 Ariel: THIS WAS STRANGE, DIARY. 1149 00:52:20,240 --> 00:52:21,520 MEGAN LARSON AND I 1150 00:52:21,560 --> 00:52:23,120 WERE SHARING A PLEASANT CONVERSATION. 1151 00:52:23,200 --> 00:52:26,360 WE HAD JUST MANAGED TO MAKE OUR PARENTS HATE EACH OTHER, 1152 00:52:26,400 --> 00:52:28,480 AND NOW WERE WE STARTING TO LIKE, 1153 00:52:28,520 --> 00:52:31,200 OR AT LEAST TOLERATE, EACH OTHER? 1154 00:52:31,240 --> 00:52:32,640 I ONLY ACTED THAT WAY 1155 00:52:32,680 --> 00:52:35,600 BECAUSE I THOUGHT YOU WANTED ME TO. 1156 00:52:35,640 --> 00:52:38,160 Y-YOU MEAN SO MUCH TO ME. 1157 00:52:38,200 --> 00:52:42,000 AND I THOUGHT YOU WANTED ME TO ACT THE WAY I DID. 1158 00:52:42,040 --> 00:52:44,000 WHO SAID THAT? 1159 00:52:49,600 --> 00:52:51,000 INCOMING LOOKS. 1160 00:52:51,040 --> 00:52:52,080 THIS IS VERY NOT GOOD. 1161 00:52:52,080 --> 00:52:54,080 Megan: WELL, I THOUGHT THAT IF COSMO WERE LIKE THAT, 1162 00:52:54,080 --> 00:52:55,760 AND YOU WERE, YOU KNOW, MORE LIKE THIS, 1163 00:52:55,760 --> 00:52:58,440 THEN WE COULD ALL BE MORE...SOMETHING ELSE. 1164 00:52:58,440 --> 00:53:00,400 THAT IS THE MOST RIDICULOUS ANSWER 1165 00:53:00,440 --> 00:53:02,160 I'VE EVER HEARD, MEGAN. 1166 00:53:02,240 --> 00:53:03,000 GIVE ME A FEW MINUTES. 1167 00:53:03,040 --> 00:53:05,400 I COULD MAKE IT SOUND MORE CONVINCING. 1168 00:53:05,920 --> 00:53:07,880 ARIEL? 1169 00:53:10,440 --> 00:53:12,640 OH, SHAME AND IGNOMINY! 1170 00:53:12,680 --> 00:53:15,120 I HAVE DISGRACED MYSELF AND MY FAMILY 1171 00:53:15,120 --> 00:53:17,240 ALL FOR MY OWN SELFISH REASONS. 1172 00:53:17,280 --> 00:53:19,840 NO, ARIEL, ARIEL, DON'T CRY. 1173 00:53:19,880 --> 00:53:21,400 WE KNOW THIS ISN'T EASY. 1174 00:53:21,440 --> 00:53:23,560 WE UNDERSTAND, DON'T WE, COS? 1175 00:53:23,600 --> 00:53:25,440 OF COURSE WE DO. 1176 00:53:26,280 --> 00:53:30,400 I GUESS IT'S NOT EASY BEING AN ALIEN. 1177 00:53:38,400 --> 00:53:41,200 I CAN ENDURE THIS NO LONGER. 1178 00:53:41,280 --> 00:53:44,800 [SIGHS] I'M SORRY, FATHER. 1179 00:53:47,800 --> 00:53:48,760 MY DARLING FANUL, 1180 00:53:48,800 --> 00:53:52,800 PLEASE COME SAVE ME FROM THIS HORRID PLACE. 1181 00:53:52,800 --> 00:53:55,360 I WAIT FOR YOU EXPECTANTLY. 1182 00:53:55,400 --> 00:53:57,760 YOURS, SAWEEZA. 1183 00:53:58,320 --> 00:54:00,400 P.S. WHATEVER YOU DO, FANUL, 1184 00:54:00,440 --> 00:54:02,000 YOU MUST NOT TELL YOUR FATHER, 1185 00:54:02,000 --> 00:54:05,000 THE EMPEROR S'VAD, WHERE WE ARE. 1186 00:54:16,520 --> 00:54:19,240 Megan: PLAN "A" WENT TOTALLY BELLY UP, DIARY, 1187 00:54:19,280 --> 00:54:22,040 BUT I DEFINITELY HAVE A PLAN "B." 1188 00:54:22,080 --> 00:54:23,960 SOMETIMES I WONDER FOR A SECOND 1189 00:54:24,000 --> 00:54:26,400 IF I'M DOING THE RIGHT THING HERE. 1190 00:54:26,440 --> 00:54:29,400 I MEAN, COS IS A COMPLETE FREAK OF NATURE, 1191 00:54:29,440 --> 00:54:30,520 BUT HE KINDA GROWS ON YOU. 1192 00:54:30,520 --> 00:54:34,160 AND ARIEL, WELL, I MEAN, IS IT REALLY HER FAULT 1193 00:54:34,200 --> 00:54:37,280 THAT EVERYBODY MISTAKES HER WEIRDNESS FOR COOLNESS? 1194 00:54:37,320 --> 00:54:39,200 BUT STILL... 1195 00:54:39,200 --> 00:54:42,080 Megan: ALL WE HAVE TO DO IS MAKE 'EM FALL FOR SOMEBODY ELSE. 1196 00:54:42,120 --> 00:54:45,800 LIKE, MY MOM IS STILL TOTALLY IN LOVE WITH MY DAD. 1197 00:54:45,840 --> 00:54:47,320 WELL, NOT LOVE EXACTLY. 1198 00:54:47,360 --> 00:54:50,480 ACTUALLY, THEY DON'T EVEN SEEM TO REALLY LIKE EACH OTHER MUCH, 1199 00:54:50,560 --> 00:54:52,320 BUT THEY WERE MARRIED FOR 10 YEARS. 1200 00:54:52,360 --> 00:54:53,560 PLUS, THEY HAD ME AND TREV TOGETHER. 1201 00:54:53,560 --> 00:54:56,640 SO THAT IS WHAT ENDED THEIR RELATIONSHIP? 1202 00:54:56,680 --> 00:54:57,600 HORRID! 1203 00:54:57,640 --> 00:54:58,760 APPALLING. 1204 00:54:58,800 --> 00:55:00,000 GROTESQUE. 1205 00:55:00,040 --> 00:55:01,520 DREADFUL. 1206 00:55:01,560 --> 00:55:02,320 LOSER! 1207 00:55:02,360 --> 00:55:04,400 WHAT ABOUT YOUR DAD? IS THERE ANYBODY 1208 00:55:04,400 --> 00:55:06,680 YOU'VE MET WHO'S EVEN SORT OF LIKE YOUR MOM? 1209 00:55:06,720 --> 00:55:09,960 WELL, IN FACT, YOUR MOTHER, KATHY LARSON, 1210 00:55:10,000 --> 00:55:11,360 HAS A WARMTH AND PLEASANTNESS TO HER 1211 00:55:11,400 --> 00:55:13,720 THAT ARE REMINISCENT OF MY MOTHER. 1212 00:55:13,720 --> 00:55:15,560 IN THAT SENSE, I CAN SEE WHY MY FATHER 1213 00:55:15,560 --> 00:55:18,280 ENJOYS HER COMPANY AND IS CHEERED BY HER. 1214 00:55:18,320 --> 00:55:20,080 FOR THAT MATTER, MY MOM SEEMS 1215 00:55:20,080 --> 00:55:21,320 TO GET ALONG BETTER WITH YOUR DAD 1216 00:55:21,360 --> 00:55:22,280 THAN SHE EVER DID WITH MINE. 1217 00:55:22,320 --> 00:55:24,720 I MEAN, THEY DO LAUGH A LOT MORE. 1218 00:55:24,720 --> 00:55:25,480 YES, THEY DO. 1219 00:55:25,520 --> 00:55:27,320 AND TREV LOVES YOUR DAD. 1220 00:55:27,360 --> 00:55:29,240 MY FATHER LOVES TREV. 1221 00:55:29,240 --> 00:55:30,320 BUT ANYWAY-- [CLEARS THROAT] 1222 00:55:30,360 --> 00:55:33,160 YES, ANYWAY-- [CLEARS THROAT] 1223 00:55:33,200 --> 00:55:34,240 THERE IS ONE INDIVIDUAL. 1224 00:55:34,240 --> 00:55:36,960 DO YOU KNOW THE SPIRITUAL GUIDE SERENA SOO? 1225 00:55:37,000 --> 00:55:37,720 [BELL RINGS] 1226 00:55:37,760 --> 00:55:38,840 DIDN'T SHE BELIEVE SHE WAS, LIKE, 1227 00:55:38,880 --> 00:55:40,000 NAPOLEON OR SOMETHING? 1228 00:55:40,040 --> 00:55:42,720 WELL, SHE'S QUITE MISGUIDED IN HER BELIEFS, 1229 00:55:42,760 --> 00:55:46,160 BUT HER MANNER IS AT LEAST CALM AND HARMONIOUS. 1230 00:55:46,240 --> 00:55:47,280 THAT'S PERFECT. 1231 00:55:47,280 --> 00:55:48,440 SO HERE'S THE PLAN. 1232 00:55:48,440 --> 00:55:50,480 WE'LL TELL OUR PARENTS THAT WE WANT TO THROW 'EM A PARTY. 1233 00:55:50,520 --> 00:55:51,800 YOU KNOW, TO MAKE THINGS UP TO THEM. 1234 00:55:51,840 --> 00:55:54,920 PARENTS LOVE IT WHEN YOU SAY YOU'RE GONNA MAKE THINGS UP TO THEM. 1235 00:55:54,920 --> 00:55:56,800 WE'LL INVITE EVERYBODY, AND PRESTO! 1236 00:55:56,840 --> 00:55:57,920 CHEMISTRY TAKES OVER. 1237 00:55:57,920 --> 00:56:00,360 MY DAD HAS ME AND TREV THIS WEEKEND. 1238 00:56:00,400 --> 00:56:01,920 IT'S PERFECT. 1239 00:56:01,960 --> 00:56:03,320 [VIDEO GAME BEEPING] 1240 00:56:03,440 --> 00:56:05,160 I DON'T KNOW HOW TO TELL YOU THIS, 1241 00:56:05,200 --> 00:56:08,120 BUT YOU WERE RIGHT, TREV. 1242 00:56:08,120 --> 00:56:09,680 COS IS AN ALIEN. 1243 00:56:09,680 --> 00:56:11,120 I KNOW THAT. 1244 00:56:11,120 --> 00:56:13,840 A BAD ALIEN. 1245 00:56:13,880 --> 00:56:15,640 HE IS NOT. 1246 00:56:15,960 --> 00:56:20,800 TREVOR, WHEN HAVE I EVER LIED TO YOU? 1247 00:56:20,800 --> 00:56:22,640 EVERY DAY? 1248 00:56:23,120 --> 00:56:24,440 WELL, THIS TIME I'M NOT. 1249 00:56:24,480 --> 00:56:29,040 COSMO IS ONE SERIOUSLY SCARY ALIEN. 1250 00:56:30,320 --> 00:56:34,560 I DIDN'T WANT TO HAVE TO SHOW YOU THIS, BUT... 1251 00:56:35,240 --> 00:56:36,560 LOOK. 1252 00:56:37,400 --> 00:56:38,200 "MY PLANE--" 1253 00:56:38,240 --> 00:56:40,800 PLAN. MY PLAN TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD. 1254 00:56:40,800 --> 00:56:42,760 BY COSMO COLA. 1255 00:56:42,800 --> 00:56:44,040 CHAPTER ONE... 1256 00:56:44,080 --> 00:56:46,000 EAT TREVOR. 1257 00:56:50,160 --> 00:56:53,160 W-WHAT DO I NEED TO DO? 1258 00:56:55,160 --> 00:56:57,280 ♪ ALL RIGHT ♪ 1259 00:56:58,280 --> 00:57:00,280 MOM AND COS'LL BE BACK IN A COUPLE OF MINUTES, 1260 00:57:00,320 --> 00:57:04,320 AND MY DAD AND SERENA SOO'LL BE HERE, TOO. 1261 00:57:04,960 --> 00:57:05,760 ♪ FIRST OF ALL ♪ 1262 00:57:05,800 --> 00:57:07,400 ♪ WHEN YOU WAKE UP IN THE EVENING ♪ 1263 00:57:07,440 --> 00:57:08,400 [FOOD PROCESSOR WHIRS] 1264 00:57:08,440 --> 00:57:10,800 ♪ FIND YOURSELF THINKING ABOUT THE THINGS... ♪ 1265 00:57:10,840 --> 00:57:12,600 WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 1266 00:57:14,080 --> 00:57:17,400 ARIEL, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 1267 00:57:17,440 --> 00:57:19,360 I AM PREPARING THE FOOD. 1268 00:57:19,360 --> 00:57:21,160 I PUT THE STUFF IN DIFFERENT BOWLS 'CAUSE THEY'RE, LIKE, 1269 00:57:21,200 --> 00:57:23,000 ACTUALLY DIFFERENT PARTS OF THE MEAL. 1270 00:57:23,040 --> 00:57:25,640 DO THEY NOT ALL END UP IN THE INTESTINAL TRACT? 1271 00:57:25,680 --> 00:57:27,920 WELL, YEAH, BUT-- 1272 00:57:27,960 --> 00:57:30,320 [DOORBELL RINGS] 1273 00:57:30,360 --> 00:57:33,600 ♪ PUT A SMILE ON YOUR FACE... ♪ 1274 00:57:33,680 --> 00:57:35,880 [SIGHS] I WILL BE RID OF HER SOON. 1275 00:57:35,880 --> 00:57:38,360 ♪ PUT A SMILE ON YOUR FACE ♪ 1276 00:57:38,360 --> 00:57:40,760 ♪ MAKE THE WORLD A BETTER PLACE... ♪ 1277 00:57:40,800 --> 00:57:42,240 I AM SERENA SOO. 1278 00:57:42,280 --> 00:57:45,160 YOU MUST BE MEGAN. 1279 00:57:45,200 --> 00:57:47,680 HI. COME ON IN. 1280 00:57:51,480 --> 00:57:53,120 ARIEL! 1281 00:57:53,200 --> 00:57:57,280 MY SWEET! IT'S BEEN DAYS! 1282 00:57:57,320 --> 00:57:58,640 WHERE IS YOUR FATHER? 1283 00:57:58,680 --> 00:58:00,360 ♪ YOU CAN SAY THAT I'M A DREAMER... ♪ 1284 00:58:00,400 --> 00:58:01,880 CAN I COME OUT YET? 1285 00:58:01,880 --> 00:58:04,880 GO BACK TO BED, TREV. 1286 00:58:05,360 --> 00:58:06,080 WHO'S THAT LADY? 1287 00:58:06,120 --> 00:58:08,600 [WHISPERS] She's a bad alien, too. 1288 00:58:08,640 --> 00:58:10,680 Go back to your room, ok? 1289 00:58:10,720 --> 00:58:12,240 AWW... 1290 00:58:12,720 --> 00:58:14,960 YOU WERE MICKEY MANTLE, ROKY. 1291 00:58:15,000 --> 00:58:17,520 A FAMOUS BASEBALL PLAYER. 1292 00:58:17,600 --> 00:58:20,080 MAYBE YOU TWO COULD GET A GAME UP. 1293 00:58:20,080 --> 00:58:20,880 Cos: OH, MY! 1294 00:58:20,920 --> 00:58:23,680 IT WAS WONDERFUL! IT WAS SICK! 1295 00:58:23,720 --> 00:58:26,400 I RODE UNDERNEATH THE BOARD. 1296 00:58:26,400 --> 00:58:28,520 HE REALLY DID. 1297 00:58:28,560 --> 00:58:30,880 WOW, LOOK AT THIS! 1298 00:58:30,920 --> 00:58:32,120 GREAT JOB, GIRLS. 1299 00:58:32,160 --> 00:58:34,000 DADDY, LOOK WHO HAS JOINED US. 1300 00:58:34,040 --> 00:58:35,120 OUR NEIGHBOR, SERENA SOO. 1301 00:58:35,200 --> 00:58:36,800 WHAT'S THE NEWS, SERENA SOO? 1302 00:58:36,840 --> 00:58:40,320 YOU POSSESS GREAT SAVAGE BLUSTER, MR. COLA, 1303 00:58:40,360 --> 00:58:43,600 AND YET, THERE IS AN INNER CHILD CRYING OUT 1304 00:58:43,600 --> 00:58:47,240 FOR TENDERNESS AND COMPASSION. 1305 00:58:47,280 --> 00:58:50,000 ACTUALLY, I THINK THAT'S MY STOMACH. 1306 00:58:50,040 --> 00:58:51,120 MUST BE HUNGRY! 1307 00:58:51,120 --> 00:58:52,800 [CHUCKLES] 1308 00:58:54,040 --> 00:58:54,720 HI! 1309 00:58:54,720 --> 00:58:55,520 I'M KATHY LARSON. 1310 00:58:55,560 --> 00:58:59,440 KATHY, YOU WEAR A NIMBUS OF DISTRUST. 1311 00:58:59,440 --> 00:59:02,040 RIGHT. I GOT IT AT THE MALL. 1312 00:59:02,080 --> 00:59:05,240 HUMOR CAN BE SUCH AN EFFECTIVE DEFENSE, 1313 00:59:05,280 --> 00:59:06,320 CAN'T IT, KATHY? 1314 00:59:06,400 --> 00:59:10,880 ONLY AGAINST PEOPLE WHO HAVE NO SENSE OF HUMOR. 1315 00:59:10,920 --> 00:59:14,240 WOULD YOU LIKE SOMETHING TO DRINK, SERENA? 1316 00:59:14,320 --> 00:59:16,920 I WILL HAVE A CHAI. 1317 00:59:20,160 --> 00:59:22,440 MEGAN. ARIEL. 1318 00:59:22,480 --> 00:59:24,240 WHAT ARE YOU GIRLS UP TO? 1319 00:59:24,280 --> 00:59:25,400 [DOORBELL RINGS] 1320 00:59:25,440 --> 00:59:27,160 I'LL GET IT! 1321 00:59:29,280 --> 00:59:30,680 DADDY! 1322 00:59:30,720 --> 00:59:31,640 HONEY, HI. 1323 00:59:31,640 --> 00:59:33,960 Kathy: FRED? WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE TODAY? 1324 00:59:34,000 --> 00:59:35,680 MEGAN TOLD ME TO COME TODAY. 1325 00:59:35,760 --> 00:59:36,840 YOU DID? 1326 00:59:36,880 --> 00:59:39,400 WELL, I THOUGHT DADDY MIGHT WANT TO JOIN US FOR DINNER. 1327 00:59:39,440 --> 00:59:40,400 ABOUT THAT, HONEY, 1328 00:59:40,440 --> 00:59:42,720 I STILL HAVE SOME WORK TO DO. 1329 00:59:42,760 --> 00:59:44,120 IS IT OK IF I JUST PICK YOU GUYS UP 1330 00:59:44,160 --> 00:59:45,520 AND BRING YOU BACK TO MY PLACE? 1331 00:59:45,520 --> 00:59:47,280 I CAN BRING MY STUFF HOME AND WORK 1332 00:59:47,320 --> 00:59:50,080 WHILE YOU GUYS WATCH TV. WHAT DO YOU SAY? 1333 00:59:50,120 --> 00:59:52,200 BUT WE CAN'T, DADDY, BECAUSE-- 1334 00:59:52,240 --> 00:59:54,360 BECAUSE TREV-- HE'S SICK. 1335 00:59:54,360 --> 00:59:55,160 REALLY HE IS. 1336 00:59:55,160 --> 00:59:57,800 COME ON, I'LL SHOW YOU. 1337 00:59:59,360 --> 01:00:01,920 [COUGHING] 1338 01:00:13,040 --> 01:00:16,160 ELIZABETH, I'M COMING TO JOIN YA. 1339 01:00:16,200 --> 01:00:17,160 ELIZABETH! 1340 01:00:17,200 --> 01:00:18,960 FRED SANFORD! EXCELLENT! 1341 01:00:19,000 --> 01:00:20,720 Trevor: ELIZABETH! 1342 01:00:20,720 --> 01:00:22,160 TREVOR? 1343 01:00:26,720 --> 01:00:28,720 IF YOU AND MOM GET BACK TOGETHER, 1344 01:00:28,720 --> 01:00:32,640 CAN I STILL PLAY WITH COS SOMETIMES, 1345 01:00:32,680 --> 01:00:34,400 EVEN IF HE IS BAD? 1346 01:00:34,400 --> 01:00:35,280 WHO'S COS? 1347 01:00:35,360 --> 01:00:36,840 Megan: UM, DAD, ARE YOU SURE YOU DON'T WANT 1348 01:00:36,880 --> 01:00:41,360 TO STAY FOR DINNER, AS LONG AS YOU'RE ALREADY HERE? 1349 01:00:43,240 --> 01:00:46,960 Megan: THINGS WERE NOT GOING EXACTLY AS I'D PLANNED, 1350 01:00:47,040 --> 01:00:50,080 AND IN THE KITCHEN, DIARY, IT WAS EVEN WORSE. 1351 01:00:50,080 --> 01:00:51,400 [COS COUGHS] I MUST TELL YOU, 1352 01:00:51,400 --> 01:00:54,920 SERENA SOO, THAT MANY, IF NOT ALL OF YOUR IDEAS 1353 01:00:54,920 --> 01:00:59,280 ARE HIGHLY IMPROBABLE, IF NOT IMPOSSIBLE. 1354 01:00:59,320 --> 01:01:01,280 YOU'RE BLOCKING THE TRAUMA, COSMO. 1355 01:01:01,320 --> 01:01:04,480 YOU DID DIE IN THE CIVIL WAR. 1356 01:01:04,560 --> 01:01:06,000 I PROMISE YOU I DIDN'T. 1357 01:01:06,040 --> 01:01:06,840 YOU REALLY DID, 1358 01:01:06,880 --> 01:01:08,920 AND YOU WERE A RACCOON IN ANOTHER LIFE. 1359 01:01:08,920 --> 01:01:11,280 WHERE DO YOU COME UP WITH THESE THINGS? 1360 01:01:11,320 --> 01:01:14,960 [CHUCKLES] I'M HIGHLY SENSITIVE, 1361 01:01:15,000 --> 01:01:16,320 AND I AM ALSO PRESCIENT. 1362 01:01:16,320 --> 01:01:18,880 I KNOW WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN. 1363 01:01:18,920 --> 01:01:19,600 DO YOU? 1364 01:01:19,640 --> 01:01:21,680 YES, IT'S A GREAT GI-- [COUGHING] 1365 01:01:21,720 --> 01:01:23,040 [FLY BUZZING] 1366 01:01:23,120 --> 01:01:24,960 I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU KIDS ARE UP TO, MEGAN, 1367 01:01:25,000 --> 01:01:27,320 BUT IF YOU WANT TO COME TO MY HOUSE FOR DINNER, 1368 01:01:27,360 --> 01:01:28,320 WE'D BETTER GET GOING. 1369 01:01:28,360 --> 01:01:29,680 I'VE ALREADY LOST AN HOUR. 1370 01:01:29,720 --> 01:01:32,360 THEN YOU'LL ONLY BE 23/7 TODAY? 1371 01:01:32,400 --> 01:01:33,960 VERY FUNNY. 1372 01:01:33,960 --> 01:01:35,320 WHO ARE YOU? 1373 01:01:35,360 --> 01:01:39,240 COSMO COLA-- KATHY'S FIANCE. 1374 01:01:40,520 --> 01:01:42,520 WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN? 1375 01:01:42,560 --> 01:01:44,440 IT WAS KIND OF SUDDEN. 1376 01:01:44,440 --> 01:01:47,600 COSMO AND I MET SHORTLY AFTER HE AND ARIEL, 1377 01:01:47,640 --> 01:01:51,280 HIS DAUGHTER, MOVED HERE FROM THE YUKON. 1378 01:01:54,200 --> 01:01:57,280 NO ONE LIVES IN THE YUKON. 1379 01:01:57,280 --> 01:02:00,360 ANYWAY, WE'RE VERY HAPPY TOGETHER, 1380 01:02:00,400 --> 01:02:03,120 AND WE'VE DECIDED TO MARRY. 1381 01:02:05,480 --> 01:02:07,560 I NEED AN ANTACID. 1382 01:02:07,600 --> 01:02:08,320 [COUGHING] 1383 01:02:08,320 --> 01:02:10,680 IT'S NOT AN ANTACID YOU NEED. 1384 01:02:10,720 --> 01:02:12,000 IT'S HARMONY. 1385 01:02:12,000 --> 01:02:12,680 WHAT? 1386 01:02:12,720 --> 01:02:15,240 YOUR SOUL IS THAT OF A WARRIOR. 1387 01:02:15,280 --> 01:02:17,680 IT NEEDS TO BE CALMED, NOT EXCITED. 1388 01:02:17,720 --> 01:02:21,520 YOU ARE VERY PERCEPTIVE. 1389 01:02:21,560 --> 01:02:25,400 I...AM SERENA SOO. 1390 01:02:26,160 --> 01:02:28,120 FRED LARSON. 1391 01:02:28,160 --> 01:02:29,000 [NERVOUS LAUGH] 1392 01:02:29,000 --> 01:02:31,320 DINNERTIME, EVERYBODY. 1393 01:02:32,000 --> 01:02:35,600 OK...MOM, YOU CAN SIT OVER THERE NEXT TO DAD... 1394 01:02:35,640 --> 01:02:39,000 AND COS AND SERENA SOO CAN SIT RIGHT HERE NEXT TO EACH OTHER. 1395 01:02:39,000 --> 01:02:43,200 YOU KNOW, FOR A NICE MIX AND ALL. 1396 01:02:43,200 --> 01:02:44,840 TREVOR, NOT THERE. 1397 01:02:44,840 --> 01:02:47,120 YOU GIVE AND YOU GIVE AND YOU GIVE, FRED. 1398 01:02:47,200 --> 01:02:50,320 24 HOURS A DAY, 7 DAYS A WEEK. 1399 01:02:50,360 --> 01:02:51,840 AND WHAT DO YOU ASK FOR IN RETURN? 1400 01:02:51,840 --> 01:02:55,280 A LITTLE RESPECT. A LITTLE CONSIDERATION. 1401 01:02:55,320 --> 01:02:57,520 IT'S TRUE. 1402 01:03:01,520 --> 01:03:03,560 WELL, GIRLS, THIS LOOKS... 1403 01:03:03,600 --> 01:03:07,520 VERY INVENTIVE. 1404 01:03:07,880 --> 01:03:10,240 THEY USED MY RECIPE. 1405 01:03:10,280 --> 01:03:12,240 Serena Soo: PERHAPS I COULD CLEANSE YOUR AURA. 1406 01:03:12,280 --> 01:03:15,440 I'VE NEVER HAD ANYONE CLEANSE MY AURA BEFORE. 1407 01:03:15,520 --> 01:03:18,240 OH, YOU MUST LET ME DO A PSYCHIC READING... 1408 01:03:18,280 --> 01:03:19,600 Megan: THIS HAD TO BE STOPPED, DIARY. 1409 01:03:19,640 --> 01:03:22,800 DAD WAS RIGHT ON THE VERGE OF FALLING IN LOVE WITH THE BLAIR WITCH. 1410 01:03:22,840 --> 01:03:24,960 SO I DID THE FIRST THING I COULD THINK OF. 1411 01:03:25,000 --> 01:03:27,080 I'M SURE I COULD SQUEEZE IN A LITTLE-- 1412 01:03:27,120 --> 01:03:27,920 AAH! 1413 01:03:27,960 --> 01:03:30,240 I KNOW, I KNOW. IT SEEMS TOTALLY LAME. 1414 01:03:30,240 --> 01:03:32,320 BUT AT THAT MOMENT, IT WAS ALL I COULD THINK OF 1415 01:03:32,360 --> 01:03:34,960 TO AT LEAST GET PEOPLE MAD AT EACH OTHER... 1416 01:03:34,960 --> 01:03:37,200 BUT EVEN THAT DIDN'T WORK. 1417 01:03:39,640 --> 01:03:40,760 AT LAST! 1418 01:03:40,800 --> 01:03:43,840 THE PERFECT MOMENT! 1419 01:03:43,880 --> 01:03:46,040 AAH! 1420 01:03:46,320 --> 01:03:47,440 WHOO HOO-- HO HO! 1421 01:03:47,480 --> 01:03:49,520 I DON'T THINK I EVER USED THE WORD DEBACLE BEFORE, DIARY, 1422 01:03:49,600 --> 01:03:51,400 BUT THIS WAS DEFINITELY ONE... 1423 01:03:51,400 --> 01:03:52,680 OR MAYBE IT WAS A FIASCO. 1424 01:03:52,720 --> 01:03:55,760 WHATEVER IT WAS, IT WASN'T GOOD. 1425 01:03:55,760 --> 01:03:56,840 [SHRIEKING LAUGHTER] 1426 01:03:56,880 --> 01:04:00,720 I LOOKED OVER AT ARIEL, AND SHE LOOKED SUPER-STRANGE. 1427 01:04:00,760 --> 01:04:02,320 IT WAS LIKE, I DON'T KNOW... 1428 01:04:02,400 --> 01:04:05,400 SHE WAS FALLING APART OR SOMETHING. 1429 01:04:05,440 --> 01:04:06,880 AND WHEN I FOLLOWED HER, 1430 01:04:06,920 --> 01:04:08,040 THE WEIRDEST THING EVER HAPPENED. 1431 01:04:08,080 --> 01:04:10,200 I'M NOT EVEN REALLY SURE HOW TO DESCRIBE IT. 1432 01:04:10,240 --> 01:04:13,280 [HOOTING AND LAUGHING] 1433 01:04:30,400 --> 01:04:31,600 AAH! AAH! 1434 01:04:31,600 --> 01:04:32,640 AAH! AAH! 1435 01:04:32,640 --> 01:04:34,440 AAH! AAH! 1436 01:04:35,800 --> 01:04:36,800 SHE HAS NO BODY! 1437 01:04:36,800 --> 01:04:38,000 SHE HAS NO BODY! 1438 01:04:38,040 --> 01:04:39,640 SHE'S JUST LIKE A BLOB! 1439 01:04:39,640 --> 01:04:41,880 WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, MEGAN? 1440 01:04:42,280 --> 01:04:43,200 GET AWAY FROM ME! 1441 01:04:43,240 --> 01:04:45,280 MEGAN, WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU? 1442 01:04:45,280 --> 01:04:46,680 WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU GUYS? 1443 01:04:46,720 --> 01:04:49,720 DIDN'T YOU HER ME? SHE'S AN ALIEN! 1444 01:04:51,280 --> 01:04:57,320 MAYBE YOU FEEL LIKE AN ALIEN SOMETIMES, MEGAN, HMM? 1445 01:04:58,240 --> 01:05:01,040 I'VE SEEN THIS REACTION BEFORE. 1446 01:05:01,080 --> 01:05:02,200 IT'S HARDLY UNCOMMON. 1447 01:05:02,240 --> 01:05:05,640 MANY CHILDREN FEAR CHANGE OF THIS MAGNITUDE. 1448 01:05:05,640 --> 01:05:08,920 MEGAN HAS GOTTEN USED TO YOUR CURRENT LIVING ARRANGEMENT, 1449 01:05:08,960 --> 01:05:11,560 NOT SHARING YOU, AT LEAST WITH ANOTHER PARENT. 1450 01:05:11,600 --> 01:05:14,160 WITH YOUR IMPENDING MARRIAGE, 1451 01:05:14,160 --> 01:05:17,360 THAT BALANCE WILL BE UPSET. 1452 01:05:17,400 --> 01:05:21,160 THIS ALIEN STORY IS MERELY AN ATTEMPT 1453 01:05:21,160 --> 01:05:22,480 TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING. 1454 01:05:22,520 --> 01:05:27,000 THEN YOU THINK IT'S ALL RIGHT TO GO THROUGH WITH THE WEDDING? 1455 01:05:27,000 --> 01:05:29,160 AS LONG AS IT'S WHAT YOU WANT. 1456 01:05:29,160 --> 01:05:35,120 I THINK IT'S IMPERATIVE... FOR HER SAKE. 1457 01:05:37,840 --> 01:05:40,320 HOW DO I LOOK? 1458 01:05:40,360 --> 01:05:42,200 GREAT. 1459 01:05:42,200 --> 01:05:44,600 THIS IS ALL GONNA WORK OUT, MEG. 1460 01:05:44,640 --> 01:05:45,400 I PROMISE. 1461 01:05:45,440 --> 01:05:47,360 MOM, HE'S AN ALIEN. 1462 01:05:47,360 --> 01:05:49,440 I KNOW. BUT AFTER WE'RE MARRIED, 1463 01:05:49,480 --> 01:05:52,240 HE WANTS TO BECOME A CITIZEN. 1464 01:05:52,280 --> 01:05:55,040 THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT. 1465 01:05:55,440 --> 01:05:58,040 I KNOW. 1466 01:05:58,960 --> 01:06:00,120 [SIGH] 1467 01:06:00,160 --> 01:06:03,600 ISN'T THERE ANYTHING I CAN DO TO STOP YOU FROM MARRYING COS? 1468 01:06:03,640 --> 01:06:04,800 MEGAN... 1469 01:06:04,840 --> 01:06:06,960 WELL, IT'S JUST THAT YOU PROMISED YOU WOULDN'T MARRY HIM 1470 01:06:07,000 --> 01:06:08,720 IF I DIDN'T LEARN TO LIKE HIM. 1471 01:06:08,720 --> 01:06:09,800 OH, MEGAN, HONEY, 1472 01:06:09,840 --> 01:06:12,120 I HAVE THOUGHT ABOUT THIS LONG AND HARD, 1473 01:06:12,160 --> 01:06:14,760 AND I'VE TALKED TO THE DOCTOR ABOUT IT. 1474 01:06:14,800 --> 01:06:20,360 IF I, FOR ONE SECOND, THOUGHT YOUR FEARS WERE JUSTIFIED... 1475 01:06:20,400 --> 01:06:22,240 I KNOW THAT HE'S DIFFERENT. 1476 01:06:22,240 --> 01:06:26,160 IT'S PART OF WHAT MAKES HIM SO WONDERFUL. 1477 01:06:26,200 --> 01:06:28,600 COSMO MAKES ME SO HAPPY, HONEY. 1478 01:06:28,640 --> 01:06:33,680 AND I KNOW THAT THIS MARRIAGE IS GONNA MAKE THIS FAMILY HAPPY, TOO. 1479 01:06:33,920 --> 01:06:35,360 DO YOU THINK I'M GOING CRAZY? 1480 01:06:35,400 --> 01:06:39,320 WE'RE ALL A LITTLE CRAZY AROUND HERE. 1481 01:06:39,360 --> 01:06:42,280 THAT'S WHAT MAKES US SO SPECIAL. 1482 01:06:42,320 --> 01:06:43,560 I LOVE YOU, SWEETIE. 1483 01:06:43,600 --> 01:06:46,880 I LOVE YOU, TOO, MOM. 1484 01:06:47,560 --> 01:06:50,920 EVERYTHING IS GONNA WORK OUT JUST FINE. 1485 01:06:51,600 --> 01:06:58,560 ♪ ALL I NEED, ALL MY LIFE, IS TO LOVE SOMEBODY... ♪ 1486 01:06:58,600 --> 01:07:00,240 OH, NO, THANK YOU. 1487 01:07:00,280 --> 01:07:00,880 [BARKING] 1488 01:07:00,920 --> 01:07:03,920 HA HA, ROKY. HI, BABY. 1489 01:07:03,920 --> 01:07:07,440 MEGAN, YOU LOOK BEAUTIFUL. 1490 01:07:07,440 --> 01:07:09,160 YES, FUTURE DAUGHTER, YOU'RE MORE LOVELY 1491 01:07:09,200 --> 01:07:11,400 THAN CORNFLAKES AND ROOT BEAR. 1492 01:07:11,440 --> 01:07:12,280 HEH HEH. 1493 01:07:12,280 --> 01:07:14,160 THANKS...I GUESS. 1494 01:07:14,200 --> 01:07:15,680 WHERE'S ARIEL? 1495 01:07:15,680 --> 01:07:18,160 UH, SHE'LL BE JOINING US SHORTLY. 1496 01:07:18,200 --> 01:07:21,680 I BELIEVE SHE NEEDED A MOMENT OF MEDITATION TO... 1497 01:07:21,720 --> 01:07:22,640 COLLECT HERSELF. 1498 01:07:22,680 --> 01:07:26,920 OR MAYBE SHE'S JUST KICKING BACK IN THE SINK. 1499 01:07:28,960 --> 01:07:34,160 GOOD-BYE, ZIRCALON. GOOD-BYE, FANUL. 1500 01:07:34,240 --> 01:07:38,320 GOOD-BYE, SAWEEZA. 1501 01:07:40,320 --> 01:07:42,000 HELLO, SAWEEZA. 1502 01:07:42,080 --> 01:07:45,240 IS IT POSSIBLE? IS IT? 1503 01:07:45,280 --> 01:07:47,000 IT IS I, FANUL. 1504 01:07:47,000 --> 01:07:49,600 FANUL...POWERFULLY GRATEFUL I AM TO SEE YOU. 1505 01:07:49,640 --> 01:07:53,480 PLEASE! SAWEEZA, SUCH PHYSICAL PROXIMITY IS REPULSIVE TO ME. 1506 01:07:53,480 --> 01:07:57,160 UM...I'M SORRY, FANUL. 1507 01:07:59,320 --> 01:08:00,840 WE MUST MOVE QUICKLY. 1508 01:08:00,840 --> 01:08:03,800 DADDY, OR COSMO COLA, AS HE IS CALLED HERE, 1509 01:08:03,840 --> 01:08:06,040 IS SUPPOSED TO COMMIT HIMSELF IN MARRIAGE 1510 01:08:06,080 --> 01:08:07,640 TO THE EARTH WOMAN, KATHY LARSON, 1511 01:08:07,680 --> 01:08:08,680 IN LESS THAN AN HOUR. 1512 01:08:08,720 --> 01:08:12,320 S'vad: YOUR FATHER IS VERY DANGEROUS TO ME, SAWEEZA. 1513 01:08:12,320 --> 01:08:14,200 HE WANTS CHANGE. 1514 01:08:14,240 --> 01:08:17,120 WHAT IS OUR VIEW OF CHANGE, FANUL? 1515 01:08:17,200 --> 01:08:18,160 CHANGE IS BAD. 1516 01:08:18,160 --> 01:08:20,720 THINGS SHOULD AND MUST STAY EXACTLY AS THEY ARE. 1517 01:08:20,760 --> 01:08:24,600 BUT CHANGE IS NOT ALWAYS BAD, EMPEROR. 1518 01:08:24,640 --> 01:08:26,480 SAWEEZA. 1519 01:08:26,520 --> 01:08:30,360 ALREADY THIS PLANET HAS POISONED HER MIND. 1520 01:08:30,360 --> 01:08:33,360 HAVE YOU EVER BEEN FROZEN SOLID, SAWEEZA? 1521 01:08:33,360 --> 01:08:37,680 IT CAN BE REVERSED, BUT ONLY AT MY PLEASURE. 1522 01:08:38,360 --> 01:08:41,240 YOU WOULDN'T WANT YOUR FATHER TO BE FROZEN FOREVER, 1523 01:08:41,280 --> 01:08:43,760 WOULD YOU, SAWEEZA? 1524 01:08:43,800 --> 01:08:44,720 NO. 1525 01:08:44,760 --> 01:08:49,680 GOOD. THEN YOU WILL LEAD US TO HIM, WON'T YOU? 1526 01:08:50,200 --> 01:08:51,000 WON'T YOU? 1527 01:08:51,040 --> 01:08:53,240 HELLO, IS THE LOO OCCUPADO? 1528 01:08:53,280 --> 01:08:56,240 OH, I'M SORRY. 1529 01:08:56,240 --> 01:08:57,760 WRONG ROOM. 1530 01:08:57,800 --> 01:09:00,400 HELLO, SERENA SOO. 1531 01:09:00,400 --> 01:09:03,320 ARIEL, MY SWEET. 1532 01:09:03,360 --> 01:09:07,280 WELL, WHO ARE YOUR CHARMING FRIENDS? 1533 01:09:07,320 --> 01:09:10,080 THIS IS MIKE... 1534 01:09:10,080 --> 01:09:11,200 AND HIS FATHER, DOUG. 1535 01:09:11,240 --> 01:09:13,400 THEY'RE FROM THE YUKON ALSO. 1536 01:09:13,400 --> 01:09:14,160 PLEASURE. 1537 01:09:14,200 --> 01:09:16,160 YOU WILL LEAD US TO COSMO COLA. 1538 01:09:16,200 --> 01:09:18,720 OH, THERE IS NO NEED TO BE SO TENSE. 1539 01:09:18,720 --> 01:09:22,280 WOULD YOU LIKE SOME NICE RELAXING HERBAL GUM? 1540 01:09:22,320 --> 01:09:23,600 BE SILENT. 1541 01:09:23,600 --> 01:09:26,360 [GASP] AAH! 1542 01:09:26,400 --> 01:09:30,240 WHAT ANNOYING CREATURES THESE EARTHLINGS ARE. 1543 01:09:31,000 --> 01:09:33,360 EMPEROR, PERHAPS YOU ARE RIGHT. 1544 01:09:33,360 --> 01:09:35,120 PERHAPS WE ARE ANNOYING CREATURES-- 1545 01:09:35,160 --> 01:09:36,480 "WE"? 1546 01:09:36,520 --> 01:09:38,040 THEY... 1547 01:09:38,080 --> 01:09:42,840 BUT, EMPEROR, THERE'S MORE TO IT THAN THAT. 1548 01:09:42,880 --> 01:09:46,320 THERE'S A WARMTH AND KINDNESS TO THESE HUMANS, 1549 01:09:46,360 --> 01:09:49,160 A BRAVERY THAT MIGHT SURPRISE YOU... 1550 01:09:49,200 --> 01:09:50,720 IF YOU GAVE 'EM A CHANCE. 1551 01:09:50,760 --> 01:09:53,920 SOMETIMES... ONE MUST BE CRUEL 1552 01:09:53,960 --> 01:09:57,240 IN ORDER TO BE KIND, SAWEEZA. 1553 01:09:57,280 --> 01:10:00,000 FANUL, GUARD THE PRISONER. 1554 01:10:00,040 --> 01:10:04,760 I SHALL FIND COSMO COLA MYSELF. 1555 01:10:09,280 --> 01:10:10,320 FANUL, PLEASE. 1556 01:10:10,360 --> 01:10:12,760 HE IS MY FATHER, SAWEEZA. 1557 01:10:12,800 --> 01:10:15,200 I HAVE NO CHOICE. 1558 01:10:16,440 --> 01:10:19,040 I WISH I DID. 1559 01:10:21,800 --> 01:10:23,760 INTRUDER ALERT! INTRUDER ALERT! 1560 01:10:23,800 --> 01:10:26,360 UH, CUTE KID. EXCUSE ME. 1561 01:10:26,400 --> 01:10:27,920 WHERE DO YOU WANT THE 82 CASES OF ROOT BEER? 1562 01:10:27,960 --> 01:10:30,120 I WILL ASSIST WITH THE BEVERAGES. 1563 01:10:30,160 --> 01:10:31,240 HURRY BACK. 1564 01:10:31,280 --> 01:10:32,080 COME, YOUNG TREVOR. 1565 01:10:32,120 --> 01:10:33,520 WE WILL VANQUISH THE VILLAINS TOGETHER! 1566 01:10:33,560 --> 01:10:39,160 MEGAN, CAN YOU GO SEE IF YOU CAN FIND ARIEL? WE'RE ABOUT TO START. 1567 01:10:39,480 --> 01:10:41,280 IN A MINUTE. 1568 01:10:41,320 --> 01:10:42,320 MEGAN, THE FUTURE MRS. COLA, 1569 01:10:42,320 --> 01:10:45,240 I'M TELLING YOU, IT IS A LOVELY DAY FOR A WEDDING. 1570 01:10:45,280 --> 01:10:48,760 OF COURSE, I'D RATHER BE WINDSURFING. 1571 01:10:48,800 --> 01:10:49,640 NO DOUBT. 1572 01:10:49,680 --> 01:10:51,840 MEGAN, I'M SERIOUS. GO FIND YOUR SISTER. 1573 01:10:51,840 --> 01:10:52,600 SHE'S NOT MY SISTER. 1574 01:10:52,640 --> 01:10:55,040 OH, I'LL GO GET HER. WHERE IS SHE? 1575 01:10:55,080 --> 01:10:58,320 [SIGH] COME ON. 1576 01:11:12,000 --> 01:11:13,760 MAN, ARE THESE FAT-FREE? 1577 01:11:13,800 --> 01:11:14,880 I MEAN, THEY LOOK FAT-FREE, 1578 01:11:14,960 --> 01:11:19,400 BUT I'VE NEVER SEEN 'EM SUCH A GOLDEN BROWN BEFORE. 1579 01:11:19,440 --> 01:11:21,200 [SIGH] 1580 01:11:22,600 --> 01:11:24,200 CHIP? 1581 01:11:28,000 --> 01:11:29,200 HEH. 1582 01:11:29,200 --> 01:11:31,800 WHAT IS THAT? 1583 01:11:33,160 --> 01:11:36,000 THAT IS SERENA SOO. 1584 01:11:36,040 --> 01:11:36,960 [PANTING] 1585 01:11:37,000 --> 01:11:40,560 WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 1586 01:11:45,200 --> 01:11:47,200 HEH. 1587 01:11:47,240 --> 01:11:50,200 ARIEL, WHAT'S GOING ON? 1588 01:11:50,240 --> 01:11:51,600 WHO IS THAT? 1589 01:11:51,640 --> 01:11:54,120 THAT IS FANUL. 1590 01:11:54,160 --> 01:11:57,560 FANUL, YOUR BOYFRIEND, FANUL? 1591 01:11:59,400 --> 01:12:01,560 HE AND HIS FATHER, THE EMPEROR S'VAD, 1592 01:12:01,560 --> 01:12:03,120 HAVE COME FOR MY FATHER. 1593 01:12:03,160 --> 01:12:05,320 I KNEW THAT GUY WASN'T INVITED... 1594 01:12:05,360 --> 01:12:07,760 BUT WHAT DOES HE WANT WITH YOU YOUR FATHER? 1595 01:12:07,760 --> 01:12:11,400 MY FATHER IS A GREAT FREEDOM FIGHTER ON ZIRCALON, MEGAN. 1596 01:12:11,400 --> 01:12:12,560 ZIRCA-WHAT? 1597 01:12:12,560 --> 01:12:16,200 ZIRCALON. OUR HOME PLANET. 1598 01:12:16,240 --> 01:12:21,360 YOU WERE ENTIRELY CORRECT IN ALL OF YOUR INFERENCES, MEGAN. 1599 01:12:21,360 --> 01:12:24,520 MY FATHER AND I ARE ALIENS. 1600 01:12:27,400 --> 01:12:28,960 WHY DID YOU COME HERE? 1601 01:12:29,000 --> 01:12:31,680 JUST TO MAKE ME FEEL INFERIOR OR WHAT? 1602 01:12:31,720 --> 01:12:35,560 WE CAME TO ESCAPE POLITICAL REPRESSION ON ZIRCALON. 1603 01:12:35,600 --> 01:12:40,600 WE STAYED BECAUSE MY FATHER FELL DEEPLY IN LOVE WITH YOUR MOTHER. 1604 01:12:41,280 --> 01:12:43,000 AND THAT'S IT? 1605 01:12:43,040 --> 01:12:44,280 YOU'RE JUST A KID WHO GOT STUCK 1606 01:12:44,280 --> 01:12:48,120 ON A WHOLE NEW PLANET WHERE YOU DIDN'T KNOW ANYBODY? 1607 01:12:48,120 --> 01:12:49,280 THAT'S BOGUS. 1608 01:12:49,280 --> 01:12:50,440 I CHANGED HOMEROOM LAST YEAR, 1609 01:12:50,440 --> 01:12:55,200 AND IT TOTALLY THREW ME OFF FOR, LIKE, 6 MONTHS. 1610 01:12:57,280 --> 01:13:01,520 I GUESS I HAVEN'T BEEN MUCH OF A HELP, HAVE I? 1611 01:13:01,560 --> 01:13:04,000 YOU CAN HELP ME NOW, MEGAN. 1612 01:13:04,040 --> 01:13:06,720 WELL, I CAN TRY. 1613 01:13:07,800 --> 01:13:09,680 WHAT? 1614 01:13:09,720 --> 01:13:11,400 I WAS QUITE WRONG ABOUT YOU. 1615 01:13:11,440 --> 01:13:15,160 YOU ARE NOT THE CRUEL, HEARTLESS BEING I ONCE IMAGINED. 1616 01:13:15,160 --> 01:13:19,200 YOU ARE, IN TRUTH, INCREDIBLY BRAVE AND FEARLESS. 1617 01:13:19,240 --> 01:13:21,480 WELL, I'M HARDLY FEARLESS. 1618 01:13:21,480 --> 01:13:23,920 YOU ARE, COMPARED TO ME. 1619 01:13:23,960 --> 01:13:28,800 WELL, HEY, WHO DIED AND MADE YOU DICTATOR, DUDE? 1620 01:13:28,840 --> 01:13:31,040 WATCH THIS ONE, TOO, FANUL. 1621 01:13:31,080 --> 01:13:31,920 YES, FATHER. 1622 01:13:31,960 --> 01:13:34,120 YOU'RE EXTREMELY RUDE, DO YOU KNOW THAT? 1623 01:13:34,160 --> 01:13:38,240 SILENCE, PEON! 1624 01:13:40,160 --> 01:13:44,640 MAN, I SERIOUSLY GOTTA IMPROVE MY VOCABULARY. 1625 01:13:44,680 --> 01:13:47,000 OH, CHECK IT OUT. IT'S A PARTY. 1626 01:13:47,000 --> 01:13:50,280 HEY, MEGAN, ARIEL. 1627 01:13:51,520 --> 01:13:54,680 THAT'S PRETTY UNUSUAL. 1628 01:13:54,680 --> 01:13:57,200 OH, THANK YOU SO MUCH. 1629 01:13:57,200 --> 01:13:58,400 I LOVE THAT YOU COULD COME. 1630 01:13:58,440 --> 01:14:00,800 WILL YOU JUST EXCUSE ME? 1631 01:14:02,280 --> 01:14:03,640 UH-HUH. 1632 01:14:04,760 --> 01:14:06,400 HI, CAN I HELP YOU? 1633 01:14:06,440 --> 01:14:10,080 I'M LOOKING FOR THE ONE CALLED COSMO COLA. 1634 01:14:10,120 --> 01:14:12,160 OH, I THINK HE'S STILL OUT FRONT. 1635 01:14:12,200 --> 01:14:13,200 IF YOU SEE HIM, WOULD YOU TELL HIM 1636 01:14:13,200 --> 01:14:16,160 THE CEREMONY'S STARTING IN 15... 1637 01:14:16,200 --> 01:14:17,840 MINUTES? 1638 01:14:22,040 --> 01:14:24,280 YOU HAVE TAKEN ME FAR FROM HOME. 1639 01:14:24,320 --> 01:14:28,240 ARE YOU READY TO PAY FOR YOUR CRIMES? 1640 01:14:28,320 --> 01:14:30,360 S'VAD? 1641 01:14:30,400 --> 01:14:33,000 EMPEROR S'VAD, TO YOU. 1642 01:14:34,880 --> 01:14:38,840 YOU WILL COME WITH ME...NOW. 1643 01:14:38,880 --> 01:14:42,640 WHOA. I'VE NEVER SEEN ONE LIKE THAT BEFORE. 1644 01:14:42,680 --> 01:14:45,400 YOU WANT TO TRADE? 1645 01:14:46,080 --> 01:14:48,320 TREVOR... 1646 01:14:48,360 --> 01:14:51,320 THIS IS MY FRIEND, MR. S'VAD. 1647 01:14:51,360 --> 01:14:52,720 HE, UH... 1648 01:14:52,720 --> 01:14:55,400 HE LOVES TO PLAY HIDE AND SEEK. 1649 01:14:55,400 --> 01:14:56,640 COOL. ME, TOO. 1650 01:14:56,720 --> 01:14:59,840 SO WHY DON'T YOU LET US COUNT TO 100... 1651 01:14:59,880 --> 01:15:02,000 AND WE'LL COME FIND YOU. 1652 01:15:02,040 --> 01:15:04,920 OK, BUT NO CHEATING. 1653 01:15:04,920 --> 01:15:06,920 PROMISE. 1654 01:15:11,760 --> 01:15:14,520 AFTER YOU. 1655 01:15:15,440 --> 01:15:17,520 FANUL, PLEASE? 1656 01:15:17,560 --> 01:15:20,280 OH, I CANNOT, SAWEEZA. I AM SORRY. 1657 01:15:20,280 --> 01:15:24,000 LOOK, DWEEB, JUST LET US OUT OF HERE NOW, OK? 1658 01:15:24,040 --> 01:15:26,280 OK? WHAT? 1659 01:15:26,280 --> 01:15:29,280 THIS DUDE'S FULLY SCAMMIN' ON YOU, MEGAN. 1660 01:15:29,280 --> 01:15:31,280 EWW. 1661 01:15:36,800 --> 01:15:39,600 MINT? 1662 01:15:45,200 --> 01:15:46,240 HMM. 1663 01:15:46,280 --> 01:15:47,360 CURIOUSLY STRONG. 1664 01:15:47,440 --> 01:15:48,400 OH, EXACTLY. 1665 01:15:48,400 --> 01:15:51,360 YOU KNOW WHAT? I FIND I LIKE MEGAN'S BROWN HEAD 1666 01:15:51,400 --> 01:15:53,400 BETTER THAN ARIEL'S YELLOW HEAD. 1667 01:15:53,440 --> 01:15:55,280 HA, I HEAR YA, BRO. 1668 01:15:55,320 --> 01:15:57,880 YOU SEE, THAT'S A BETTY AND VERONICA THING. 1669 01:15:57,920 --> 01:15:59,280 I MEAN, THAT'S FREEDOM OF CHOICE. 1670 01:15:59,320 --> 01:16:01,320 RIGHT ON, BRO. HIGH 5! 1671 01:16:03,040 --> 01:16:04,880 NEVER MIND, MAN. 1672 01:16:04,960 --> 01:16:07,280 HAVE YOU DECIDED YET HOW TO BEST END 1673 01:16:07,320 --> 01:16:08,760 THIS TREACHEROUS CAPTIVITY? 1674 01:16:08,800 --> 01:16:14,000 MAYBE...BUT YOU'VE GOT TO WORK WITH ME HERE. 1675 01:16:15,480 --> 01:16:19,320 SO, FANUL, YOU MUST HAVE A LOT OF POWER 1676 01:16:19,320 --> 01:16:20,320 BACK ON YOUR HOME PLANET. 1677 01:16:20,320 --> 01:16:22,440 YOU KNOW, BEING THE SON OF THE EMPEROR AND ALL. 1678 01:16:22,480 --> 01:16:26,080 WELL, IT'S A GREAT HONOR TO DO MY FATHER'S BIDDING... 1679 01:16:26,120 --> 01:16:28,520 AND TIME-CONSUMING. 1680 01:16:28,520 --> 01:16:30,480 WELL, DON'T YOU HAVE ANY TIME FOR FUN? 1681 01:16:30,520 --> 01:16:32,080 WELL, MY DUTIES DO COME FIRST, 1682 01:16:32,120 --> 01:16:34,360 BUT SOMETIMES I'M ALLOWED TO POWER FLOAT. 1683 01:16:34,360 --> 01:16:35,720 IT'S MOST ENJOYABLE. 1684 01:16:35,760 --> 01:16:37,520 UH...HOW DO YOU DO THAT? 1685 01:16:37,520 --> 01:16:39,240 WELL, FIRST, YOU NEED TO BE A BUBBLE. 1686 01:16:39,280 --> 01:16:41,560 I--I DON'T THINK I COULD DO THAT. 1687 01:16:41,600 --> 01:16:43,240 SO, THEN, IT'S KIND OF LIMITED, ISN'T IT? 1688 01:16:43,280 --> 01:16:46,800 AROUND HERE, WE HAVE LOTS OF FREE TIME. DON'T WE, CUTTER? 1689 01:16:46,840 --> 01:16:47,920 OH, YEAH. 1690 01:16:48,000 --> 01:16:50,440 AND LOTS OF CHOICES. LIKE WINDSURFING, SKATEBOARDING-- 1691 01:16:50,480 --> 01:16:52,680 OH, OH, HEY, FANUL, YOU EVER, LIKE, 1692 01:16:52,680 --> 01:16:55,280 MOUNTAIN BIKE OFF A LEDGE INTO A RIVER 1693 01:16:55,320 --> 01:16:57,160 AND THEN, LIKE, FLOATED DOWN THE RAPIDS? 1694 01:16:57,200 --> 01:16:59,000 NOW, THAT IS EXTREME. 1695 01:16:59,040 --> 01:17:00,400 IT DOES SOUND RECREATIONAL. 1696 01:17:00,440 --> 01:17:01,720 OH, DEFINITELY, FANUL. 1697 01:17:01,720 --> 01:17:03,160 WE RECREATE CONSTANTLY. 1698 01:17:03,200 --> 01:17:05,280 THAT'S ONE OF THE COOLEST THINGS ABOUT EARTH. 1699 01:17:05,320 --> 01:17:06,840 LIKE LAST YEAR, FOR INSTANCE, 1700 01:17:06,880 --> 01:17:10,320 I TOTALLY BLADED DOWN THIS MOUNTAIN. 1701 01:17:11,840 --> 01:17:15,280 YOU KNOW, I MEAN, OK, I KINDA FELL MOSTLY, 1702 01:17:15,280 --> 01:17:16,960 YOU KNOW, BUT IT WAS STILL COOL. 1703 01:17:17,000 --> 01:17:18,480 I WAS ALL LIKE, YEAH! 1704 01:17:18,520 --> 01:17:20,680 AND WHAT OTHER STUFF CAN WE DO, CUTTER? 1705 01:17:20,720 --> 01:17:24,240 YES, CUTTER, WHAT OTHER CHOICES CAN WE MAKE HERE? 1706 01:17:24,240 --> 01:17:25,440 OK, WELL, LIKE, UH... 1707 01:17:25,480 --> 01:17:29,240 OH, YEAH, WE HAVE FULLY 18 DIFFERENT FLAVORS OF POTATO CHIPS, 1708 01:17:29,240 --> 01:17:30,760 ALL OF WHICH ARE EXCELLENT. 1709 01:17:30,800 --> 01:17:35,640 EXCEPT YOGURT-FLAVORED, IT'S KINDA WEIRD. 1710 01:17:35,680 --> 01:17:36,560 YOU SEE, FANUL, 1711 01:17:36,600 --> 01:17:39,320 THIS PLANET IS ALL ABOUT FREEDOM OF CHOICE. 1712 01:17:39,360 --> 01:17:42,280 CAN YOU IMAGINE, PEOPLE HERE HAVE THE FREEDOM 1713 01:17:42,320 --> 01:17:43,120 TO FALL DOWN MOUNTAINS, 1714 01:17:43,160 --> 01:17:45,200 EAT THE CHIPS OF MANY FLAVORS. 1715 01:17:45,240 --> 01:17:46,760 BE VAPID AND SHALLOW. 1716 01:17:46,760 --> 01:17:48,240 UH, UH, EXACTLY. 1717 01:17:48,240 --> 01:17:51,840 BUT YOUR DAD, MAN, HE'S LIKE A FULL-ON TYRANT, DUDE. 1718 01:17:51,880 --> 01:17:56,320 WHOA, I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW I KNEW THAT WORD. 1719 01:17:56,320 --> 01:17:57,720 TYRANT. COOL. 1720 01:17:57,760 --> 01:18:01,000 HE DOESN'T WANT ANY FREEDOM AT ALL. 1721 01:18:01,760 --> 01:18:02,880 HE, LIKE, FROZE THAT LADY. 1722 01:18:02,920 --> 01:18:06,320 YOU KNOW? OK, IT MAY LOOK REALLY COOL, 1723 01:18:06,360 --> 01:18:08,400 YOU KNOW, BUT... IT ISN'T. 1724 01:18:08,440 --> 01:18:11,200 IN FACT, HERE, IT IS THE VERY ANTITHESIS OF COOL. 1725 01:18:11,240 --> 01:18:14,120 WHICH, I SUPPOSE, WOULD BE UNCOOL. 1726 01:18:14,120 --> 01:18:15,440 I THINK I UNDERSTAND. 1727 01:18:15,440 --> 01:18:16,520 OH, RIGHTEOUS! 1728 01:18:16,560 --> 01:18:19,200 SO, THEN, MAYBE IT'S TIME YOU STAND UP TO YOUR FATHER? 1729 01:18:19,240 --> 01:18:20,960 FOR, LIKE, FREEDOM AND LIBERTY, RIGHT? 1730 01:18:20,960 --> 01:18:24,640 'CAUSE THIS MAY BE, LIKE, THE ONLY PLANET IN THIS ENTIRE UNIVERSE 1731 01:18:24,720 --> 01:18:27,720 WITH 18 DIFFERENT FLAVORS OF POTATO CHIPS, OK? 1732 01:18:27,760 --> 01:18:30,200 I MEAN, YOU GOTTA THINK OF THAT. 1733 01:18:30,240 --> 01:18:31,160 SAY IT, FANUL. 1734 01:18:31,200 --> 01:18:32,360 I KNOW YOU HAVE IT IN YOU. 1735 01:18:32,400 --> 01:18:34,240 I KNOW THAT GOODNESS AND RIGHTEOUSNESS 1736 01:18:34,280 --> 01:18:37,280 MAKE UP THE VERY CORE OF YOUR BEING. 1737 01:18:46,440 --> 01:18:48,960 WE'RE OUT OF HERE, DUDES. 1738 01:18:51,120 --> 01:18:54,160 I CAN SEE WHY YOU LIKE FANUL. HE'S KINDA CUTE. 1739 01:18:54,160 --> 01:18:59,480 I FOUND HIM MORE APPEALING AS A SHIMMERING GASBAG. 1740 01:19:07,240 --> 01:19:12,080 ENTER THE TELEPORTATION GRID, PRISONER. 1741 01:19:14,320 --> 01:19:15,200 S'VAD, LISTEN-- 1742 01:19:15,240 --> 01:19:16,160 TRAITOR! 1743 01:19:16,160 --> 01:19:18,520 FOR THE CRIME OF QUESTIONING MY AUTHORITY, 1744 01:19:18,520 --> 01:19:21,880 I HEREBY SENTENCE YOU AND YOUR DAUGHTER... 1745 01:19:21,920 --> 01:19:25,240 TO BE ETERNALLY FROZEN. 1746 01:19:25,280 --> 01:19:27,520 PLEASE, NOT SAWEEZA. TAKE ME! 1747 01:19:34,760 --> 01:19:37,440 GOOD, FANUL, DID YOU BRING THE GIRL? 1748 01:19:37,480 --> 01:19:39,600 YES, FATHER. 1749 01:19:39,640 --> 01:19:42,320 WHAT IS THIS? THAT'S NOT SAWEEZA. 1750 01:19:42,360 --> 01:19:43,480 NO, BUT I'M HER STEPSISTER... 1751 01:19:43,520 --> 01:19:46,200 AND THAT HAPPENS TO BE MY STEPFATHER THAT YOU HAVE THERE. 1752 01:19:46,200 --> 01:19:50,120 SO YOU BETTER LET 'EM GO NOW, OK? 1753 01:19:50,160 --> 01:19:52,680 BROWNHEAD! 1754 01:19:52,720 --> 01:19:53,800 WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS? 1755 01:19:53,840 --> 01:19:56,640 IT'S TIME TO MAKE SOME CHANGES, FATHER. 1756 01:19:56,680 --> 01:19:57,880 CHANGE? 1757 01:19:57,880 --> 01:19:59,880 CLEARLY YOUR MIND HAS BEEN WARPED. 1758 01:19:59,880 --> 01:20:01,160 WHEN WE GET HOME, I WILL REMIND YOU 1759 01:20:01,200 --> 01:20:04,960 THAT THE PRICE FOR CHANGE IS ETERNAL FREEZING. 1760 01:20:05,000 --> 01:20:06,480 NOW ENTER THE GRID. 1761 01:20:06,520 --> 01:20:07,840 NOT UNTIL YOU LET THEM GO. 1762 01:20:07,880 --> 01:20:10,840 PUT THE PRISONER IN THE GRID! 1763 01:20:10,880 --> 01:20:11,520 NO! 1764 01:20:11,560 --> 01:20:14,200 YOU'RE NOT TAKING COSMO. 1765 01:20:14,800 --> 01:20:17,640 HOLD IT RIGHT THERE, GASBAG. 1766 01:20:17,680 --> 01:20:20,200 DON'T MESS WITH MY FAMILY, DUDE. 1767 01:20:20,240 --> 01:20:22,480 NO DOUBT. 1768 01:20:22,520 --> 01:20:24,400 [DRYER MOTORS WHIR] 1769 01:20:37,040 --> 01:20:42,680 FOOLISH CHILDREN, DO NOT QUESTION MY AUTHORITY! 1770 01:20:51,240 --> 01:20:54,440 IT'S INCREDIBLE. CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS? 1771 01:20:54,440 --> 01:20:55,720 I'M SURE THEY'LL BE HERE... 1772 01:20:55,760 --> 01:20:58,760 ANY MINUTE NOW. 1773 01:21:02,760 --> 01:21:08,120 YOUR TINY MACHINES HAVE NO EFFECT ON ME. 1774 01:21:10,800 --> 01:21:13,800 Megan: THIS IS VERY NOT GOOD. 1775 01:21:15,040 --> 01:21:19,640 ARIEL, FANUL... 1776 01:21:21,960 --> 01:21:24,200 [LEAF BLOWER MOTOR] 1777 01:21:24,240 --> 01:21:27,640 TRY THIS ON FOR SIZE, SUCKER! 1778 01:21:27,640 --> 01:21:29,400 NOT THE WIND! 1779 01:21:29,440 --> 01:21:32,320 NOT THE WIND! 1780 01:21:32,640 --> 01:21:34,560 TREVOR, YOU FULLY ROCK. 1781 01:21:34,600 --> 01:21:39,320 OH, TREVOR-MAN, YEAH! GO, TREVOR. 1782 01:21:40,640 --> 01:21:41,960 [LEAF BLOWERS WHIRRING] 1783 01:21:42,000 --> 01:21:45,240 CAN'T THEY SEE WE'RE TRYING TO HAVE A WEDDING HERE? 1784 01:21:45,280 --> 01:21:47,480 WHAT NERVE. 1785 01:21:59,680 --> 01:22:00,960 ALL RIGHT. 1786 01:22:01,000 --> 01:22:03,800 SWEET! ALL RIGHT! UNREAL! 1787 01:22:03,840 --> 01:22:05,920 HEY, THAT WAS COOL, TREVOR-MAN. 1788 01:22:05,960 --> 01:22:08,800 DOES THIS MEAN COS CAN GO BACK TO BEING A GOOD ALIEN? 1789 01:22:08,840 --> 01:22:10,160 COOL. 1790 01:22:13,360 --> 01:22:15,920 DADDY! HA HA! OHH! HA HA HA! 1791 01:22:15,960 --> 01:22:17,200 THANK YOU, MEGAN LARSON. 1792 01:22:17,200 --> 01:22:17,920 WE'RE FAMILY... 1793 01:22:18,000 --> 01:22:19,840 OR AT LEAST WE'RE SUPPOSED TO BE. 1794 01:22:19,840 --> 01:22:20,520 WHAT TIME IS IT? 1795 01:22:20,520 --> 01:22:24,200 TIME FOR YOU TO GET MARRIED. 1796 01:22:25,040 --> 01:22:27,720 REALLY, THANK YOU, I'M SORRY, AT ANY MINUTE. 1797 01:22:27,760 --> 01:22:28,920 Cos: KATHY! 1798 01:22:28,960 --> 01:22:31,320 MOM! 1799 01:22:31,680 --> 01:22:33,320 SO SORRY TO HAVE KEPT YOU WAITING. 1800 01:22:33,360 --> 01:22:37,480 I WOULD WAIT FOREVER FOR YOU. 1801 01:22:39,160 --> 01:22:44,480 HONEY, HAVE YOU SEEN SERENA? 1802 01:22:44,520 --> 01:22:45,360 UHH. 1803 01:22:45,360 --> 01:22:47,280 COSMO, REPEAT AFTER ME: 1804 01:22:47,360 --> 01:22:51,280 I, COSMO, TAKE THEE, KATHERINE, TO BE MY WIFE. 1805 01:22:51,320 --> 01:22:55,200 I, COSMO, TAKE THEE, KATHERINE, TO BE MY WIFE. 1806 01:22:55,240 --> 01:22:58,200 TO HAVE AND TO HOLD FROM THIS DAY FORWARD... 1807 01:22:58,240 --> 01:23:01,720 TO HAVE AND TO HOLD FROM THIS DAY FORWARD... 1808 01:23:01,720 --> 01:23:02,560 TO LOVE-- 1809 01:23:02,560 --> 01:23:05,320 [CELL PHONE RINGS] 1810 01:23:05,360 --> 01:23:06,160 FRED LARSON. 1811 01:23:06,200 --> 01:23:07,160 Megan: WELL, DIARY, 1812 01:23:07,200 --> 01:23:09,080 I GUESS SOME THINGS ARE JUST NEVER GONNA CHANGE. 1813 01:23:09,080 --> 01:23:10,920 NO, THAT'S FINE. NO, RING ME ANY TIME. 1814 01:23:10,920 --> 01:23:13,000 Reverend: TO LOVE, HONOR, AND CHERISH... 1815 01:23:13,040 --> 01:23:16,160 Cos: TO LOVE, HONOR, AND CHERISH... 1816 01:23:16,200 --> 01:23:17,200 FOR RICHER, FOR POORER... 1817 01:23:17,240 --> 01:23:18,120 FOR RICHER, FOR POORER... 1818 01:23:18,160 --> 01:23:21,120 ♪ IT WAS YOU THAT ♪ 1819 01:23:21,160 --> 01:23:27,280 ♪ PICKED ME UP WHEN I WAS DOWN ♪ 1820 01:23:27,360 --> 01:23:34,040 ♪ ONE LOOK IN YOUR EYES CAN TURN ME AROUND ♪ 1821 01:23:34,080 --> 01:23:35,720 DO YOU REALLY HAVE TO GO BACK TO ZIRCALON? 1822 01:23:35,760 --> 01:23:37,720 WITH MY FATHER IN HIS CURRENT CONDITION, 1823 01:23:37,760 --> 01:23:39,840 IT'S UP TO ME TO GOVERN OUR PLANET. 1824 01:23:39,880 --> 01:23:41,280 I'LL COME BACK... 1825 01:23:41,280 --> 01:23:43,720 ONCE I'VE MADE A FEW CHANGES. 1826 01:23:43,760 --> 01:23:47,280 [ROCK PLAYS] 1827 01:23:47,720 --> 01:23:49,840 Ariel: LIFE ON THIS STRANGE PLANET 1828 01:23:49,920 --> 01:23:54,160 CONTINUES TO CONFUSE AND AMUSE ME, DIARY. 1829 01:23:54,200 --> 01:23:55,400 IT'S ODD. 1830 01:23:55,440 --> 01:23:58,240 I THOUGHT MY LIFE WAS COMPLETELY OVER WHEN I CAME TO EARTH. 1831 01:23:58,280 --> 01:24:02,240 BUT NOW I CAN SEE THAT IT WAS ONLY JUST BEGINNING. 1832 01:24:02,280 --> 01:24:06,960 A NEW BOYFRIEND WHO, AS FAR AS CUMBERSOME BAGS OF SKIN GOES, 1833 01:24:06,960 --> 01:24:08,920 IS ACTUALLY QUITE APPEALING. 1834 01:24:08,960 --> 01:24:11,160 A NEW STEPMOTHER... 1835 01:24:11,200 --> 01:24:13,960 EVEN A NEW BEST FRIEND. 1836 01:24:14,800 --> 01:24:16,640 Megan: WELL, DIARY, I GUESS THIS IS THE PART WHERE I ADMIT 1837 01:24:16,640 --> 01:24:20,600 THAT I ACTUALLY LEARNED SOMETHING FROM THESE LAST COUPLE MONTHS...AND I DID, 1838 01:24:20,640 --> 01:24:23,440 BUT I THINK I'LL JUST KEEP IT TO MYSELF. 1839 01:24:23,480 --> 01:24:26,080 I MEAN, WHO WOULD EVER BELIEVE ALL THIS ANYWAY? 1840 01:24:26,120 --> 01:24:29,040 LET'S JUST SAY, THANKS TO MY NEW STEPSISTER, 1841 01:24:29,080 --> 01:24:32,600 THERE'S ROOM FOR EVERYBODY AT THE POPULAR TABLE. 1842 01:24:32,640 --> 01:24:35,160 COME ON, SIT WITH US. 117318