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First, as a teacher,

then as a school principal,

Christine dedicated her life to children,

both the ones she taught,

and the ones

she lovingly raised,

Clara and Aaron, of whom she was so proud.

Wherever she went Christine was a positive force

with an infectious and

zesty love of life.

And that positivity carried her through to the end.

Even after the car accident that took her leg,

she rallied taking everything in her stride.

Her life on earth may have been cut short

by a tragic stroke,

but let us remember that she lived a full life,

a life full of joy,

surrounded by love.

As we remember before you our sister Christine Mathieson,

we ask for your help for all those

who gather in her memory.

- Amen. - Amen.

Zesty, she was depressed.

I was starting to think we were at the wrong funeral.

Thank you, thank you so much, thanks.

- Sorry for your loss. - Thank you for coming.

Oh, okay, thank you.

I'm so sorry, Uncle Glen.

Thank you, Daniel, thank you.

- That's cousin, Dan? - Yeah.

Jesus, he's grown.

I need a drink.

Oh, Glen!

Wonderful, wonderful eulogy.

The Auburn High days.

Wasn't Father Brennan on song,

really captured her so well.

Oh Glen!

Darling Aaron, she was so proud of you

getting into law.

I should go get the sandwiches from the car.

You really need to eat something, yeah.

I don't want cake, okay, it's not a birthday party.

- Okay. - Sorry.

That's all right.

Clara, we're off.

Sorry, have to pick up Aish.

Thank you.

Oh, thank you.

- You okay? - Yeah, thanks for coming.

I'll see you tomorrow.

Ah, you're not taking time off?

To do what?

Well, rest,

you're gonna be exhausted after all this.

I'm gonna be fine.

Okay.

Hey, you need anything you call me.

Thanks, see ya.

The old Auburn High school days.

Who's the old chick with the big old voice?

- She's an idiot. - She taught with Mom.

Professional mourner.

The book club, which she established.

I think Dad needs saving.

No, he needs to be with his friends.

Yeah, well, they're not his friends, Aaron.

I think I need to take him home.

You just wanna go home and have a drink,

that's why you wanna go.

Okay, so then why don't you take him home

then I can drink.

I mean, I drove him here, I drove him to see Mom's body.

I drove him to the dry cleaners.

Wait, why did you go and see Mom's body?

To say goodbye.

- Or sorry. - For what?

For calling her fat.

No, I didn't.

You did, those were your exact last words to your mother.

I'm gonna save Dad.

She wouldn't like that.

She would say, "Judith, pull yourself together."

Oh, Clara, come and meet the old teaching gang.

We've met.

Bye, Glen.

Bye bye, Judith, thank you.

I wonder where all those people were after the accident.

It was nice music that you chose, or Mom chose.

Gosh, cousin Dan looks great, doesn't he?

He looks like that famous model,

you know, the guy with the mug shot.

- I've bought a holiday. - What?

For our wedding anniversary,

I was about to give it to her.

But anyway...

Dad, that's really nice.

Yeah, it was one of those packages

called Senior Love Romantica.

For aging swingers?

I'm sorry.

No,

that's all right.

Well, the catering was disappointing.

Those cupcakes were inedible.

Do you wanna keep these?

No, maybe I'll keep them.

Babe, can you please help me clean up?

My mother just died, Ella.

Do they have to wait right in front of us?

I guess our time's up.

So, you gonna go?

Well, I'll have to get the money back.

How much was it?

- It was 15,000. - $15,000!

Whoa, no wonder you got the cheap coffin.

Yeah, it's a lot, isn't it?

Not many people make it to 40 years together so...

Well, good for you.

You may as well enjoy it.

- No, no, I can't go. - Why?

Sitting at home and going through old albums

isn't gonna change a thing.

You deserve a break.

No, there's too much to do.

Like what?

Well, there's all the admin,

changing names and pin numbers, and closing accounts,

and cancelling memberships.

And, you know, and informing all the...

I mean, her room, I haven't even...

- I can do that. - I still haven't...

I can do that, I can do some of it.

You deserve it, Dad, after the last few years.

Cup of tea or a whiskey?

You go, I might have a lie down.

Okay.

Drive safe, yeah.

Babe, what are we having for dinner?

I'm starving.

Mm, I don't know.

What are you doing?

I've got a gig.

What, what's wrong?

You have a gig?

I told you about it, remember?

I mean, you're working on the day of Mom's funeral.

I know, it's not ideal.

I'm sorry.

So what, you've done your duty now,

and you're just getting on with things.

I have to go to work, Aaron, I can't just not go.

Right.

Well, what am I meant to do then?

I don't know,

there's leftovers that you can have from the wake.

No, I don't want to eat cold meat sandwiches, Ella.

I mean, do you expect me to eat by myself,

is that what you want?

Well, why don't you have dinner with your dad then?

Or why don't you order in?

I don't know.

That is fucked.

What do you mean that's fucked?

Aaron, it's not like she was my mom.

Right, so what, you don't feel anything,

is that what you're trying to say to me?

No, I'm not saying I don't feel anything.

I'm just saying that the whole world doesn't stop

because somebody dies.

That's selfish.

I'm so sorry.

Thank you.

I realise this is late notice to cancel,

but it was unavoidable, so...

Unfortunately it's as I suspected,

what's today?

So the package you purchased is no longer in the system,

because the departure date is so close.

So what does this mean?

The booking is not in the system anymore,

as the departure date is so close.

It's actually, it's not in my system anymore.

Yes, no, I understand that, but what, what is it?

What does it, what does it mean?

Well, it means it's gone to the airline and to the hotel,

and because there's no insurance attached.

Did, did you...

Yes, so you purchased the bronze package,

which has no insurance.

So there's, there's actually

no means of cancelling it from here.

Yeah.

So what do I do?

Well, you could call the airline and the hotel directly

and explain your situation.

My situation is that my wife has died.

Yes, exactly.

I know it's, it's so awful.

And so there is that option.

Or?

Or you could go on the holiday,

but I think if you call the airline and the hotel directly,

they really should address your...

Yeah, okay.

Well, I, I, I, I will call the, the,

the hotel and the airline.

Right, thank you very much.

Hello!

Hello, my name's Glen Mathieson...

Thank you for calling,

sick of waiting, why not visit our website

for anything from seat allocations to meal requests.

Ah fuck, come on!

Even after the accident,

I mean, Glen is so timid.

He won't cope without her.

You remember when Clive's wife died,

he only lasted six months.

Hello, thank you for calling,

sick of waiting, why not visit our website

for anything from seat allocations to meal requests.

- Glen! - Ah, Judith,

I'm sorry, I'm just...

Yes, yes, yes, Glen Mathieson is my name.

How wonderful to see you out and about so soon.

My God, sorry, no, I don't need those.

Can you put those back, sorry.

Yes, yes, that's correct, yes.

They were for his wife,

had a terrible car accident in the wet.

It was a stroke that took her in the end

about a week ago.

Judith, I, I don't really think

the cashier needs to know my, my situation.

Yes...

We all miss her dearly.

Yes, I was hoping you could...

Customer support, can I help you?

Oh, hello, no, sorry.

Can I help you, sir?

- Yeah, apology. - I taught with his wife...

- My name's Glen Mathieson. - for many years.

I was hoping to cancel a flight.

I'll just put you on hold.

No, no, no, no, no, no, I've been on hold.

Ah...

It's gonna be quite a difficult adjustment for you.

I suppose I don't need to tell you that.

No, you don't.

Thank you.

Take care, Judith, bye bye.

Stupid old cow.

I've got a four-page birthing plan.

No intervention, no pain relief.

Oh, and Dad wants to stick to it.

Does he?

You okay?

Yeah, of course.

What took you so long?

Where else would I rather be?

Okay, Sarah, I'm gonna ask you a few questions,

and then we can make you more comfortable, okay?

I understand you want an epidural, is that correct?

- Yes. - Great.

I'm gonna speak to you while we set up

so we can save some time.

I know you can do this with our drugs, honey.

I can't.

Any allergies, bleeding, clotting problems?

- No! - Great.

Sir, do you mind moving around,

I just need to set up here,

and go through the consent procedure.

Are we sure we can do this?

Just, just over here, please.

Sarah, there's a slight chance

that this won't work as well as you'd hope.

A 1% chance of headaches that could last up week...

Fine, can you just...

A one in many thousands of nerve damage...

and a very rare chance of infection of the spine

that can result in paraplegia.

Fine, fine!

Okay, all right, let's go.

Sit around here, come around the side.

Just once, she told me very specifically

not to give her an epidural.

No matter what I say, that's what she told me.

Do it!

We're doing it.

Did you hear what I said?

As far as you can, okay, great.

Shoulders forward.

Chin to chest and relax.

That's it.

Focus on your breathing.

Look at me, look at me.

We don't have to have it,

you can have a natural birth.

Shut up!

That's it, that's it.

You sure you want an epidural,

remember what you said.

Shut up.

Okay, how we doing over here, doing really well.

Okay, you can do this, can't she do this?

Yeah.

Tell her she can do this.

You can do this, honey.

All right, so first up

is the local aesthetic.

You're gonna feel a little pinch.

On three,

one, two, three.

That's it, that one's done.

I want my mom, can she come back in?

Soon, very soon.

All right, here we go.

I need you to stay very still for this next part.

- Shit! - What?

Nothing.

It's fine.

You're gonna feel a little bit of pressure,

but no pain.

I think she's changed her mind.

I, I don't think she's sure about this.

Please be quiet, sir.

What's happening?

Mom, hold still.

This is it, it's gonna feel a little pressure, and no pain,

please, please, no hands.

I need you to hold still.

- She doesn't want it. - I do.

Will you take her hands.

Sir, please take her hands.

She doesn't want it.

Will you stop moving!

Do you wanna end up a wheelchair holding your baby?

Because that's what's gonna happen

if I put this in your back,

and you don't put your arms down.

You want a depressed wife,

you wanna carry her around from room to room,

bathe her, change her nappy?

No you don't, because that's gonna break her,

and you, and your kids.

She wants the epidural, you jerk,

so you stay around the front, and you hold still.

- I know! - I didn't say anything.

I can hear your thoughts.

Maybe, you should have a week off.

To stay home, and what?

Cry into my wine?

Yes, safer than abusing patients.

He was being a jerk though.

A massive jerk.

You wanna get a drink?

Oh my God, you're thinking about it.

Fuck it!

Shall we go to the bar?

I think we're gonna have to,

don't think there are waiters here.

Maybe it's good the priest lied.

Maybe your mom wrote it for him.

Probably.

No, couldn't have been her, proud of both her kids?

Thank you.

Of course she was proud of you, she just...

Preferred not to show it?

Okay, you fuck up your first kid,

probably your second.

Seriously, it's trial and error,

and mainly it's error.

And, you know, they were kids when they had you,

so of course she would've done things wrong,

but that doesn't mean that...

I think I need to get drunk.

Do you though,

or do you need to drink a responsible amount, and go...

"Having fun?"

"We're not, Aisha just spewed."

Ah, Vick's timing.

How does she know?

It's like Mom's in a bar

for the first time in 1,000 years.

Let's vom!

Can you stay for one?

If I scull it.

"On my way."

- To inappropriate outbursts, -

and your mom, she did her best.

Hysterical now, and some emoji

that I dunno what that means.

What is that, is it a gravestone?

I'm sorry, I've gotta...

- I know. - Oh, seriously!

Yeah.

Come here.

Good night, don't drink more than your body weight, okay!

I'm kind of relieved that it's over.

That's fucked, isn't it?

No, sounds normal.

Go home, I love you.

Excuse me, do you mind if I borrow one of those?

Oh!

Oh, sorry.

Dad, are you okay?

Hi, Clara.

Hi.

- I've decided to go. - Go where?

Senior Love Romantica.

Ah, Senior Love, that's great, Dad,

that's awesome.

No, I don't really want to go,

it's just that I think it's a terrible waste of money

if I don't go.

And I can't get a refund.

I am really glad that you're going,

and I think that you deserve it.

And I'll have to, I'll have to sort out, you know,

the death notice when I get there,

and then sort out Mom's room.

And, you know, cancel all the specialist appointments

and, and the insurance and everything

when I get back.

Listen, darling, do you wanna come with me?

You know, take Mom's ticket.

No, no, of course, of course you don't, sorry.

You're far too busy.

Oh, sorry, I'm sorry.

Sorry, Dad, I can't,

I can't, work is so full on at the moment.

No, no, no, darling.

It's totally, totally fine, I totally understand.

You're, you...

It was worth asking.

But I can, I can take care of Mom's room if you want.

I can sort out the room.

Oh, no, you don't have to do that.

Although, yes, maybe, you know,

if you can at least maybe, you know,

go through and you just decide what it is you want to keep,

you know, what you want.

Doesn't matter, just you take anything.

Anything I want, okay.

Okay, well I'm so glad you're going.

Yeah.

When is that, when is that?

It's tomorrow.

Right, darling, I'll call you when I'm there.

- Okay. - Love you.

Bye, I love you too.

- Okay. - Okay, bye darling.

- Yeah, bye. - Bye.

Is that you, Aaron?

Yeah.

Hey,

what are you doing?

Oh, I'm,

I'm going away.

Where?

I tried to call you.

And where are you, where are you going?

Well, look, I booked a holiday for, for,

for Mom and me, Senior Love Romantica it's called.

And I couldn't get a refund,

so I told them I might as well just go.

When?

Tomorrow, the plane leaves first thing in the morning.

Two days after Mom's funeral.

Yeah, I couldn't get a refund.

On a senior love...

Love Romantica.

This is unbelievable.

I mean, no one gives a single fuck in this family.

Okay, it's like you're all glad that she's dead.

Aaron!

Look, there's another ticket.

I mean, you can come with me.

I don't wanna go to senior love, yuck!

No, okay.

Clara's coming around to, to help with Mom's room,

to help you decide what you want to keep from her things.

No, Dad, I don't want Mom's things, I want...

Fuck!

Enjoy your holiday.

Aaron!

Ah, fuck!

You smell expensive.

What?

In a good way, like perfume.

You're very...

How young are you?

I'm legal.

Oh, fuck!

I think you're younger than my brother.

I like older women.

Did you say older or old?

So long as they're fit, like you.

Women hit their sexual prime in their 40s,

for us it's our 20s.

Can you pull over please?

I'm 38.

You okay?

Oh, for fuck's sake!

Thank you, yeah.

Perfectly capable of getting into my own building,

actually, you know, manage it every day,

several times on a good day.

Thank you, have a good night.

Ah, see

in my face, purse it was.

That's very good.

Why are you always wearing those leggings?

Cause I'm going to the gym.

Ah, of course, I just came from there actually.

Did you?

Good session?

Oh, great session, thank you for asking.

Very good, okay.

Ah, fuckety-fuck.

Ah, shit, Aaron, not picking that up.

Clara, you have answered.

Oh fuck, what?

Aaron, what, what time is it?

Clara, you have to come to the hospital.

I've just, I've crashed the car.

Dad's car, you okay?

I have whiplash, but, but they've stabilised me.

Just stay there, what hospital are you at?

Please tell me it's not the Mercy?

No, it's St. Charlotte's.

Ah, stay there, I'm coming.

Everything, okay?

Yes, stupid brother crashed the car.

Clara, I'm still here.

Go away.

So you're going to the hospital.

You okay?

Yeah.

Doors and ordering rides is not beyond me.

Ah, shit, 20 minutes.

They always do that.

I can give you a lift if you want.

Or is that, is that weird?

It's just my gym's nearby, and...

I'm gonna send these to my friend

who happens to be a policewoman.

So if you rape and murder me, she will find you.

Oh yeah, that's, that's good thinking.

All right.

Oh, hi, hi?

Yeah, I'm not murdered, but if I am that guy did it.

Eww, poor Aisha.

Okay, no, go, please, go!

Bye.

Please don't remember this when we date.

Oh, we're gonna go on a date, are we?

Can you pull over, please?

Yeah, just hang on one second.

Now, just pull up anywhere.

No, no!

Yuk!

Ah, sorry.

It's okay.

You're okay.

- Here! - Oh, thanks.

You left work!

Yeah, of course, I came as soon as you called.

What happened?

I don't know, I don't remember.

I was, I was driving, and then I was texting you,

and then the next thing...

Don't cry.

Yeah, this is him, that's him, that's Ella.

Hi.

Nice to see you.

What's, what's wrong with you?

Nothing.

Oh, that's Peter.

Peter drove me, we don't know each other though.

Oh, we will be dating though apparently.

What happened?

No, it's okay, I have meds for the pain.

You can see I'm stable now.

I'm just in a little, little shock I think.

I'm just, I think I'm in a lot more pain than I seem.

No, Aaron, with the car.

Well, I was driving and

I dropped my phone.

Right.

No, it's not like that, okay.

The road was shit, it was terrible.

Where's Dad?

Is he coming?

- No. - Why not?

Because we probably shouldn't tell Dad

that you had a car accident

considering this family's history

of single vehicle accidents.

I'll explain later.

What, what do you think?

Yeah, I suppose, yeah.

He's leaving tomorrow, and if we call him now,

he's not gonna get on the plane, so...

I know, what the fuck?

What do you mean?

Why is he going on holiday?

Because he needs it, Aaron,

and I told him to go.

I'm still in a lot of pain, okay.

I feel like I've, like I've got a bleed or something.

I don't know what the fuck's going on.

Ah, for Christ sake, can you stop winging, you big baby.

He crashed his car at 10 kilometers an hour into a bin.

And you called your own ambulance, and stabilised.

You've had two paracetamol, big pussy.

Where's that tit-faced nurse?

That's my water.

I'll go find that tit-faced nurse.

She should be easy to recognise.

Well,

thank you for a lovely evening.

You still going to the gym?

Huh, no, that mood has passed.

Sorry.

Do you need a hand getting into your building again?

Okay, good.

Well...

Okay.

What, what is it?

I'm, I'm just really surprised

that you kissed me back after I vomited.

Oh yeah, that's right, yuk.

Do you have a pen?

Yeah.

Old school.

Yeah.

Call me when you're sober.

- Night. - Night.

Ah, for fuck's sake.

Senior Love Romantica?

Yes, yes.

I've never been before, have you?

Oh, every year.

Ah, I see.

Is, is there much to do there?

It's very romantic.

Good golf course.

Oh right, terrific.

Where are the socks?

What socks?

The compression socks.

I don't know.

But that was your job.

Well, just 'cause you said it doesn't mean I heard it.

So I'm to assume you don't listen.

You can assume what you like.

Oh, sorry, excuse me.

The flight not open yet?

No, I think we're all a bit early.

Oh, right.

A bit like queuing up outside the bank on pension day.

God, flight full of pensioners,

hope they've got enough Chardonnay.

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