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The following program
is brought to you in living color on NBC.
I'll bet you it is. Nah.
It's him, it's him.
How can you be sure with all this thunder and lightning?
It's spring, isn't it?
He always comes home in the spring.
Listen.
I don't know, I think it's still just the storm.
No, it's him, Joe, I know it's him.
I'll prove it to you.
Listen, listen.
Hey!
Hey, you're right, it's Sam! I told you, I told you!
Get back, get back! Yeah.
That's it, now, go!
Go, Hoss, come on, go, boy!
That's it! Hit it! Hit it!
Come on, boy, you can keep up with him!
There ain't no man in the world that can sling a sledge
as hard and fast as Sam Hill.
Storm's passing.
Always does, Pa, whenever Sam Hill comes home.
Not a sound.
Hey, Pa, you think all those stories
we hear about Sam are true?
Well, I never heard for sure they weren't.
Well, if they ain't,
somebody's got an awful lot of explaining to do to me.
For example, that, that tree up there.
Now, what, what do you call it?
A candlenut tree.
Yeah, yeah, now, how does that candlenut tree grow
up there all by itself
when the only other place in the whole world it grows
is in the tropics?
Now, how come?
Well, Sam says there's a lot of warmth in that ground.
Back a little early this year, aren't you, Sam?
Sergeant Hathaway says he heard you coming.
What are you doing here, Tyson?
Colonel Tyson, sir, if you please.
What do you want?
Don't suppose you've changed your mind
about selling me this land.
That's pretty good supposing.
Just as stubborn as she was.
But not near as polite.
Now, you ride off this land
and you take your private army with you.
You're a fool, Sam.
You only visit this place once a year.
It's a waste of good pastureland.
Pastureland?
Is that all it means to you?
Rachel's dead.
I want this land, only the land.
My mother wouldn't have you when she was alive.
You're not going to get her now.
Perhaps the real owner of this land
will have something to say about that.
You're talking to the real owner.
I'm talking to his son.
My father's dead.
Not so dead that he can't write letters.
John Henry Hill.
Isn't that his name?
That was his name.
Well, John Henry Hill is arriving
in Virginia City tomorrow,
like Lazarus rising from the grave.
You going to have the courage to meet him?
Well, my mother told me he died.
When I was 12 years old,
she got a letter from a shipmate of his.
Said he'd been washed overboard in a storm in the South Seas,
someplace in the Makassar Straits.
Hey, now, look,
I di... I didn't say it wasn't.
No, no, no, no, we got a bet, come on. All right.
Hey, Sam, tell Little Joe about the time you outpulled
that 20-mule team going up the Geiger Pass, tell him.
Eh, now, what about it, Sam, is that the truth or not?
Well, Little Joe, it wasn't really a 20-mule team.
There wasn't more than half a dozen,
and those mules weren't really pulling.
Yeah, see, what did I tell you?
You're talking to Sam Hill.
Oh, Sam, Sam, don't do that now.
We got a bed waiting for you inside.
Why, thanks, Ben,
but it's going on 18 years since I slept under a roof.
Besides, I-I want to finish this up
so I can go to Virginia City tomorrow.
Fine.
Well, I'm for bed.
You coming, boys?
No, we'll hang around here for a while, Pa.
Yeah, we want to jaw with Sam for a little bit.
Good night. Good night, Sam.
Night, Pa. Good night, Ben. Good night, Pa.
Hey, Sam, I guess you're pretty happy
about seeing your pa after all these years.
Yeah, I sure am.
Okay, horse, come on out here.
Hey, Sam...
how did you make him do that?
Well, I asked him to.
He knows what I want.
Aw...
Sure, he remembers me from last year.
We got to be real good friends.
Sam, I raised that horse from just a colt.
He don't remember nothing from day to day
except where the oat bin's at.
It seems to me like he's a real smart animal.
Horse, will you hand me that hammer?
Thank you.
Night, Sam.
Good night, boys.
See you tomorrow, Sam. Yeah, night.
Joe?
What you doing up?
Same thing you are.
He's been at it all night.
Yeah.
It'll be sunup in about an hour.
He hasn't stopped once.
Joe... Uh-huh?
Maybe he ain't got to sleep.
One time, high up in the mountains,
I heard some trappers talking
about a man that never had to sleep.
You reckon they could have been talking about Sam Hill?
Pa, you up, too?
Well, I'm sure not sleepwalking.
The way he loves horses.
Wants to be near 'em, work around them.
I guess every man has his own way of dealing with worry.
Maybe Sam's is to work his away.
Worry?
Pa, what in the tarnation could Sam Hill have to worry about?
I think he's afraid to meet his father.
Now, why would a man be afraid to meet his own father?
Well, think how you'd feel if, uh...
if someone you hadn't seen since you were a baby...
someone you'd given up for dead...
suddenly were to walk in one day
and announce to you that he was your father.
Well, I can tell you one thing... if he wasn't you,
he'd get the dangdest throwing out he ever got.
Come on, boys, I...
I don't know about Sam Hill, but we've got to get some sleep
or we won't get any work done tomorrow.
Joe? Hm?
I'll bet you that story I heard
up in the mountains from them trappers...
was true.
Hey, Sam...
say, ain't you even a little bit sleepy?
There are ways of resting the brain
without closing your eyes, Little Joe.
Yeah, but... what about the body?
The brain takes care of the body, Hoss.
Ain't you learned that yet?
Yeah...
Well, we'll... we'll see you over at the Silver Dollar, Sam.
In a bit.
Hey, Sam?
Sam, you... you want us to go in with you or anything?
No, thanks. Uh...
This is something I gotta do alone.
Dad-burn, Joe, sometimes that man does confound me.
Hm. Just then he acted like
just a plain ordinary flesh-and-blood human being.
Yeah.
And sometimes he don't.
Room 22, the bridal suite.
The what?
Mr. Hill insisted on the best.
Right up the stairs.
Thank you.
Uh, Mr. Hill?
Mr. Hill?
Percy, give us a couple down there.
Lonesome Lil, I really like you, and that's the truth.
I declare, if that ain't just about the sweetest thing
I've ever had said to me.
You don't hardly hear that kind of talk no more.
Oh, honey, I'm just getting tuned up.
Wait till I get the whole band playing.
Uh, but let's don't let ourselves
get too serious right off, you know... you know what I mean.
Well, no, honey, I don't know what you mean.
Well, I am a year or two older than you are.
Now, honey, what's that got to do with it?
To do with what?
To do with what we were talking about.
And what was that, Little Joe?
Honey? Sir? Hmm?
Well, you know what I mean...
Just heard a school bell, sonny!
Don't want to be late, do you?
Excuse me, ma'am...
but you bear a striking resemblance
to a woman I met on my travels through the Orient.
A Balinese princess, she was.
Are you sure you don't have royal blood in your veins?
I don't hardly think so.
I'm from Texas.
Now, look, mister, I'd like...
Sonny, would you get us another glass, please?
Yes, sir. Yes, sir, the similarity is remarkable.
However, this lady was somewhat smaller than you.
As a matter of fact, she only stood about three feet tall.
You wouldn't think a little woman like that
could make a man happy.
This little girl'd fool you.
Yeah, well, you know, there's a few things...
Sonny, you're getting to be an awful pest.
Now, run along. Do as I tell you, run along.
Old man, I'm losing my patience with you.
Old man, you say? Defend yourself!
What?!
Put up your dukes! Fight!
Or ain't you got any sand left in your craw?
Come on, old man, I can't fight you.
I'd advise against it, but you started this.
Now what are you going to do?
You nut!
Now, let's see, where was I?
That boy distracted me.
Oh, yes, yes, yes, I just walked into Africa
and I came out with a diamond big as a camel's eye.
Hey, give me a beer, will you, Percy?
Looks like he sort of beat your time, little brother.
Did you get a load of that old goat
saying he wanted to fight me?
I hit him once, I'd break him in two.
Another bottle of champagne, innkeeper.
Hey, sonny, you wouldn't have an extra five dollars
in your wallet, would you?
I wouldn't have an extra what?
I find myself temporarily short of funds.
I'd like to buy the young lady another drink.
And you'd like me to pay for it, huh?
I've just come to town.
You're the only friend I got.
Wait a minute, old-timer.
Who's gonna pay for this one?
I'll pay for it first thing in the morning.
Put it on my bill.
Oh, no!
You're not a very good judge of character, my man.
I'm coming in to a sum of money.
Give me back that bottle.
Not till I finish it.
All right, old-timer,
if that's the way you want it.
This saloon ain't the neighborly place
it's cracked up to be!
Drink it, man! Drink it!
A boy stood on a burning deck
pouring bubbles down his neck.
Whoa!
Whoa... whoa...
Sam, did you find your pa?
Asleep in the deep
to dream of sinning ways
in other days.
I think I just did.
Mr. Hill?
Come on, Mr. Hill.
We're going home.
Hey, you!
Stop that pounding!
Can't get any rest around here.
Hey, you! Stop that pounding!
What are you trying to do, split my skull?
Every time a feller ain't feeling good,
there's always somebody making noise.
Hey... where am I?
What have you done with me?
Ah... kidnapping, huh?
Shanghaied again.
If you think I'm serving in this prairie schooner,
you got another think coming.
I'll starve first!
Let me tell you this, you'll never get away with it, mister.
There's a law against sneaking up on a man when he's
had a few drinks and carting him off to the middle of nowhere.
And I'll tell you...
You must be my son... Sam.
When did she die?
18 years ago.
That long?
How?
What happened?
I never did find out.
Some folks say Indians, some say lightning.
Nobody knows for sure.
I seen the smoke from a ways off,
but... by the time I got here, everything was all over.
I buried her myself under the candlenut tree.
Just you?
Mm-hmm.
How old were you at the time?
I was 14.
I sent her that tree.
I know.
It was almost a joke.
Never thought it'd grow here.
Yeah, well, she had a way of making things grow.
If you're any sample, she sure did.
Why didn't you ever come back to her?
Oh, I don't know.
'Cause I'm no account, I guess.
That ain't much of an excuse.
It's the only one I got.
I loved your ma, Sam, a lot, an awful lot.
And I got it into my head that there was a pot of gold
waiting for me somewhere at the end of a rainbow
if I'd just keep looking hard enough for it.
I'm still looking.
Well, did you come back to see her or to claim the land?
This place?
Mm-hmm.
It's not mine.
It's yours now and Rachel's.
There was some talk around here that you come to sell it.
Oh, I did get a letter from some fellow hereabouts,
said he was interested in it.
I couldn't sell this place.
This is hallowed ground.
I'm glad you feel that way about it.
I mean, about not selling the place.
Not for all the money in the world.
That's good.
I... I should have known.
Uh, there's just one thing that still, uh, kind of puzzles me.
What would that be, Sam?
Well, it's been a long time since we last seen each other,
and, uh, I don't know exactly what to call you.
Yeah... Yeah, that's right.
Most people call me John Henry or J.H.
I've even known some to call me "seldom sober."
It doesn't make any difference; whichever one suits you.
Yeah, well,
I'd like to call you Pa.
Sure, Sam.
That would be fine.
Sure you want to?
I want to... Pa.
I wish I'd had a little time to spruce up before we met.
I bet you could use a hot bath, huh?
Yeah, I sure could.
Didn't know I was standing on the windward side of you.
Maybe some good solid food for a change, huh?
Sure sounds good, Sam.
Well, then, come on.
I ain't dressed fittin' to meet proper folks.
No, now, don't you mind.
I got some friends nearby that
they don't care how a man dresses.
You sure they won't object
to a couple of extra mouths for dinner?
Mind? Wait till we get to the Ponderosa.
You're gonna see a feed like you ain't never seen in your life.
Now don't you be too sure.
I remember once, down in the Fiji Islands,
I was guest of honor at this wedding feast...
lasted for 40 days and 40 nights.
I ate so much roast pig and stuffed hummingbird tongues...
Well, c-come on, Pa.
You can tell me on the way in the wagon... come on.
Arch your back, Pa.
If I arch it any more, it'll pop my stomach.
What are you trying to do, scrape my barnacles off?
Just sit up straight and stop asking so many questions.
Well, now that you're back, Mr. Hill, what are you plans?
You think you're gonna stay?
Ooh, I reckon that's up to Sam here.
I guess we can figure out something.
You ever shod a horse?
Shot a horse? Never even pointed a gun at one.
Ooh, close that door.
Where were you raised, in a barn?
Ooh, it's you, Mr. Cartwright.
Who's this?
Oh, this is my youngest son... Joseph.
What do you do, raise them in litters around here?
I'd offer to shake hands with you, son,
but I'd just give you a fistful of this sheep dip.
Ah, it's all right. I think we've met.
That's strange.
I don't recollect seeing your face before.
The Silver Dollar.
Silver what? The Silver Dollar.
That's a saloon in Virginia City.
Oh, yeah, in Virginia City.
You know, I don't remember a thing
that happened in Virginia City.
Did I say or do anything?
lf-lf I borrowed any money off of you,
you don't need to worry. I'll pay it back.
You can forget it, Mr. Hill.
Little Joe wasn't about to loan you no money.
Was you there, too, Hoss?
Beginning to end.
If you think I was drinking yesterday,
should have been with me in St. Petersburg.
This Russian Cossack captain...
he-he bet me I couldn't drink a helmet full of vodka.
It was one of them big helmets with a...
with a big spike on the top of it.
Oh, I thought that was the kind that was only worn
by, uh, German officers.
By George, you're right.
Come to think of it,
this feller did speak Russian with a German accent.
Must have been a spy.
Well...
Well, anyway...
Shut your mouth, Pa.
What?
You'll get it full of water.
Well, now, that makes it official.
You are the legal owner of the property.
Duly recorded and filed.
Thank you, Mr. Willis.
You've been very helpful.
Anytime, Colonel.
Good day, sir.
Forward... Ho!
So I says to the maharajah of Bangalore,
"Listen, Raj, there ain't no reason in the world
"why you can't kill an elephant with a bow and arrow.
It's just a case of getting a big enough arrow."
So I said, "Now, listen, Sahib, I..."
Uh, Pa... Yes, son?
It's-lt's getting kind of late.
Folks around here get... used to getting up with the sun.
Oh, Sam, don't let that worry you.
We can all afford to sleep in a little tomorrow.
No, no, Sam's right. We better go.
You boys can hear me shoot off my mouth anytime.
Mr. Hill, there's one story you gotta tell.
Now what story was that, Hoss?
It's about that tree you gave Sam's ma.
What-What was the name of it?
Oh, the, uh... the candlenut tree.
Yeah, the candlenut tree.
You'd be surprised
how many folks come up here, year after year,
from miles around, just to look at that tree
setting up there on the hill blooming the year round.
Well, if you think that's something,
you should hear what happened to me in Mozambique.
There was this, uh, coconut palm about 200 feet tall.
200 feet?!
Well, give or take an inch or two, son.
Mr. Hill, I really don't think
you understand about the candlenut tree.
You see, with the kind of weather we have out here,
that-that tree should have died more times than we can count.
Yeah, what with the rain and frost, sleet, snow...
we get maybe 40 feet of snow up here in the Sierra.
But up on that hill...
up on that hill, the grass is green the year round.
That candlenut tree just seems
to gets taller and prettier all the time.
Seems like nothing in the world can stop it.
Yeah, yeah, that's pretty wonderful.
Let me finish telling you about that big coconut tree.
Oh. Seems we have visitors.
Hello, Mr. Tyson.
May I come in, sir?
Mr. Hill...
you've completed your part of the bargain.
I'm completing mine.
Here's your money.
I don't know what you're talking about.
You know well enough.
Tyson, I don't know what you're up to,
but if this is another one of your tricks...
Mr. Tyson, I think it might be better if you were to leave now.
Must be some kind of mistake, Colonel.
This ain't my money.
I'll be happy to leave
now that my business transaction is over.
And that money, Mr. Hill, is full payment
for the land you deeded over to me last night.
Good evening, sir.
You're lying.
He didn't sell you anything.
Didn't he?
Why don't you check the territorial land office?
You'll find there's a fully-documented,
signed and witnessed deed.
And one more thing...
don't you ever set foot on that land again.
I didn't do it.
Honest, Sam, I didn't do it.
I just want the truth.
I'm telling the truth.
Well, I-I wouldn't do a thing like that.
How can you be so sure?
You were so drunk, you couldn't remember Little Joe,
you couldn't remember Hoss.
What's the last thing you do remember?
I don't know.
I-I couldn't do a thing like that, could I?
Could I?
Old man, did you come back here
after all these years just to sell my mother's grave?
Now hold on, Sam.
All we've got to go on so far is Tyson's word.
We'll ride into the land office and see for ourselves.
You can do that if you want to, Ben.
I'm going home.
Nobody's taking that land away from me.
Hoss, Joe,
we're going to Virginia City.
Adam, you'll have to take care of that timber transaction
with Mr. Richards in the morning.
Mr. Hill...
you'd better come along with us.
Yes, sir.
Aw, come on, Willis, it was filed today.
Well, that don't make it any easier to find.
There are certain ways to cross-file these transactions.
That's the way it's done.
Oh, here it is.
Now, this document... Let me see that.
I didn't sign it, did I?
Did I, Mr. Cartwright?
That's my name, all right, but... I didn't sign it.
I couldn't have.
Here, write your signature.
What? What'd you say?
I said write your signature.
Oh, sure, sure, Mr. Cartwright.
I signed that paper.
I signed that paper, Mr. Cartwright.
I don't remember doing it, but...
I know I did.
How am I gonna face my boy?
How?
I don't know.
Well, now that that's settled, can I go back...
Nothing is settled.
Hoss... go find the sheriff.
We'll ride out and make sure that Tyson doesn't set foot
on Sam's land until we can prove that this paper
isn't worth the... the paper it's written on.
You coming?
Aw, I don't guess I will.
Better be moving on.
Mr. Hill...
I can't tell you what to do,
but I will tell you this...
if you don't face up to Sam...
you'll be doing as much harm to him as to yourself.
I know it, Mr. Cartwright.
I know it.
Man like you can do it, Sam can do it.
I just can't.
I don't know why.
I just can't.
Well...
you, uh... you ride on back to the Ponderosa with Joe,
and Hoss and I... we'll go with the sheriff.
We'll tell Sam.
Thank you, Mr. Cartwright.
Sam.
Sam Hill!
I ordered you off this land.
Are you going, or do I have to throw you off?
All right, sir, you give me no choice.
Dismount!
Throw him off my land.
Well, grab him, do you hear?
That's an order!
You're just like she was:
stubborn, independent, refusing to bend to my will.
Just like her, Tyson!
Colonel! Do you hear?
You call me Colonel Tyson!
You're no colonel, you're a fake!
Like that hired army of yours!
How could you expect my mother to even look at you?
You're not even a man!
Hill!
You're just a shell,
filling an empty uniform.
I don't want to kill you.
I didn't want to kill her.
What's happening?
The earth's moving.
What's causing it?
That's what makes that tree grow where it shouldn't!
Where everybody said it didn't have a chance!
That's what keeps the snow off my mother's grave,
even in the deep of winter!
And that, Tyson,
is what will keep you from ever taking this place!
Now, tell me... what do you mean you killed her?
I-I didn't. I didn't.
She wasn't supposed to be in the house.
I never wanted to kill anyone, ever.
Why? Why did you do it?
I did it for her.
I wanted her.
Don't you see? With the house gone,
she would have had to come to me.
Not ever... you know that!
Oh, yes, she would have.
Not for me, perhaps, but for you.
So you'd have a home.
It was always you she was thinking of.
And I wanted her, but...
it was an accident she was in the house.
It... it was an accident.
No!
Please d-don't kill me.
Sam...
Sam, we heard.
Don't know what to say.
There's nothing to say, Ben.
Pa...
it's hard to believe.
By all rights, that hot spring ought to have washed away
that hillside a long time ago.
Yeah.
I guess that spring just wanted to stay underground
and keep that earth warm.
Yeah, I reckon so.
It'll take a heap of legal doing
to straighten this mess out in the books, but...
I'll guarantee you that nobody'll ever
take this piece of property away from Sam.
I guess when the story of what happened here tonight
gets around... nobody's ever gonna try.
Come on, Tyson.
I don't suppose he'll ever be able to tell you himself...
but your father really didn't know what he'd done.
I know, Ben.
I know.
Thank you, Ben.
Bye, Sam.
See you next spring, Sam.
We'll be listening for you this time, Sam.
Yeah, this time, we'll know it's you coming.
Well, so long, boys.
Well, old man, you coming?
You mean I can?
You mean I can, Sam? I ain't got much choice.
You're my pa, ain't you? I'm stuck with you.
Somebody's got to take care of you.
I can take care of myself.
Maybe you ain't heard about my travels.
No, but I got a feeling I'm going to.
You know, we got to stop at that hotel there in Virginia City.
Little matter of a bill I got to pay.
And, uh, I want to pick up my stuff, too.
Oh, if you think I'm gonna load down this wagon
with all that junk...
Yeah, well, I guess it don't amount to much.
One thing I want to get, though.
I ain't never been without your ma's picture.
We'll get it, Pa.
Yeah.
I'm tired of honky-tonk women
I'm tired of traveling around
I'm tired of Suzy and Curly and Kate
I'm thinking of settling down
Give me a girl who'll be kind to my dog
And teach my kids how to pray...
John Henry?
Come on, jackass!
Old man, who is this?
We don't rightly know.
Call him Billy Joe.
John Henry, I must've walked a thousand miles following you.
How come you ran off and left me way back in Carson City?
I knew there was something I forgot.
He's been tailing me
ever since he was six or seven years old, I reckon.
My ma told me never to let you out of my sight,
but it sure is a hard job keeping up with you.
Yeah. Say, exactly which one was your ma, Billy Joe?
He ain't gonna amount to much, but I can't seem to shake him.
He can play that guitar,
and he makes up the prettiest songs you ever heard.
All right, get on, boy.
We got a lot of iron to pound between now and spring.
Hoss, will you tie that thing on the end of the wagon?
Yeah. Come on, boy.
I'll tell you just what my son here done.
You see, there was this here enemy colonel,
and he had an army of about 7,000 men.
They come a-chargin' up this hill, this cavalry...
Giddyap!
and Sam, all he had was a hammer.
He started swinging that hammer,
and them fellers started dropping like tenpins!
Bullets was a-rattlin' off of his chest
like popcorn out of a skillet...
Hey, hey, cut out the racket!
What in the Sam Hill's going on?
Sam Hill. What?
Yeah, yeah, Pa, we're just telling him good-bye.
Oh.
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