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1
00:01:20,481 --> 00:01:22,281
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
2
00:02:16,241 --> 00:02:18,121
(DISHES CLINKING)
3
00:02:22,361 --> 00:02:25,481
- I'm sorry.
- No, Betty, this is yours.
4
00:02:27,081 --> 00:02:31,081
What's going on here? Silly.
5
00:02:31,801 --> 00:02:33,721
Pass the sugar, lover.
6
00:02:33,841 --> 00:02:36,401
- Hand me the bread, Momma.
- Yes, Poppa.
7
00:02:36,481 --> 00:02:39,121
- There we are.
- Thank you.
8
00:02:39,201 --> 00:02:41,321
That's strawberry jam in there.
9
00:02:41,401 --> 00:02:44,481
How about some celery?
Would you like some celery?
10
00:02:44,561 --> 00:02:46,561
Thank you.
11
00:02:46,641 --> 00:02:49,121
(JAZZ PLAYING)
12
00:02:50,681 --> 00:02:53,241
- Are you starting this all over again?
- (LAUGHING)
13
00:03:02,001 --> 00:03:05,481
BOTH: That's the best cup of tea
you ever made.
14
00:03:06,481 --> 00:03:08,521
- Shakespeare.
- Longfellow.
15
00:03:08,601 --> 00:03:11,681
- Needles.
- Pins. (LAUGHS)
16
00:03:11,761 --> 00:03:15,121
- Isn't that cute?
- (CLOCK CHIMING)
17
00:03:15,201 --> 00:03:17,521
Oh, Daphne, look at the time.
18
00:03:17,601 --> 00:03:19,841
We must hurry, or we'll be late
for our bridge party.
19
00:03:19,921 --> 00:03:21,401
Oh, honey, you'll have to excuse us,
20
00:03:21,481 --> 00:03:23,681
but Mrs Addlequist is
calling for us any minute.
21
00:03:23,761 --> 00:03:25,401
- Have a good time, Momma.
- I will, Poppa.
22
00:03:25,481 --> 00:03:26,601
See you before you go.
23
00:03:26,681 --> 00:03:28,801
Oh, lover.
24
00:03:30,521 --> 00:03:32,481
(DOORBELL RINGS)
25
00:03:32,561 --> 00:03:34,401
That must be Mrs Addlequist, now.
26
00:03:34,481 --> 00:03:36,601
Let her in, darling,
and tell her we'll be right down.
27
00:03:36,681 --> 00:03:37,801
Come on, Betty, come on.
28
00:03:37,881 --> 00:03:39,241
(DOORBELL RINGS)
29
00:03:40,121 --> 00:03:43,201
- Come in, Mrs Adeltwist.
- A special delivery for Mr Hardy.
30
00:03:43,281 --> 00:03:46,081
- Oh.
- Sign, please.
31
00:03:48,761 --> 00:03:51,241
- (DOOR CLOSES)
- Come in, Mrs Addlequist.
32
00:03:52,361 --> 00:03:54,281
It wasn't Mrs Twiddlepast.
33
00:03:54,361 --> 00:03:57,921
Not Twiddlepast, Adelquick,
uh, Addlequist.
34
00:03:58,001 --> 00:03:59,961
Never mind who it was, who was it?
35
00:04:00,041 --> 00:04:02,361
- It was a letter for you.
- Oh!
36
00:04:02,441 --> 00:04:04,241
It's from my mother.
37
00:04:04,321 --> 00:04:05,681
What's she say?
38
00:04:05,761 --> 00:04:08,201
I'll find out
as soon as I get my glasses.
39
00:04:18,561 --> 00:04:20,761
(LOUD CRUNCHING)
40
00:04:23,081 --> 00:04:25,121
"My dear son Ollie,
41
00:04:25,201 --> 00:04:28,881
"I was cleaning up the attic and in
going through a lot of rubbish,
42
00:04:28,961 --> 00:04:30,161
"I came acr..."
43
00:04:30,241 --> 00:04:32,521
(LOUD CRUNCHING)
44
00:04:36,001 --> 00:04:37,681
Don't be rude.
45
00:04:39,441 --> 00:04:41,041
HARDY: Now look what you've done.
46
00:04:46,601 --> 00:04:49,201
Take some hot water
and clean those off.
47
00:04:55,281 --> 00:04:56,801
(CRACKING)
48
00:04:58,401 --> 00:05:04,441
My eyes are getting worse every day.
This letter is just a blur. Hurry up.
49
00:05:05,401 --> 00:05:07,201
Thank you.
50
00:05:08,281 --> 00:05:10,241
Now, that's better.
51
00:05:10,321 --> 00:05:12,401
"My dear son Ollie,
52
00:05:12,481 --> 00:05:16,561
"I was cleaning up the attic today
and in going through a lot of rubbish
53
00:05:16,641 --> 00:05:19,041
"I came across this picture
of you and Stan
54
00:05:19,121 --> 00:05:22,161
"and your twin brothers, Bert and Alf
55
00:05:22,241 --> 00:05:26,521
"so I thought you would
like to have it. Lovingly, Mother."
56
00:05:26,601 --> 00:05:29,521
- Isn't that swell?
- Can you imagine that?
57
00:05:29,601 --> 00:05:32,321
Our very own twin brothers.
58
00:05:33,401 --> 00:05:35,401
I wonder where they are.
59
00:05:36,761 --> 00:05:39,241
Cha, cha, cha.
60
00:05:39,321 --> 00:05:42,801
(LAUGHS) Seems like only yesterday.
61
00:05:42,881 --> 00:05:45,961
LAUREL: Which is you?
HARDY: Well, that's me right there.
62
00:05:46,041 --> 00:05:50,161
- (SCOFFS) Look at me.
- But that isn't you, that's Alf.
63
00:05:53,921 --> 00:05:55,921
Let me have your glasses.
64
00:06:00,401 --> 00:06:03,241
(NASALLY) You mean to tell me
I don't know which is me?
65
00:06:03,321 --> 00:06:05,601
That's me, right there.
66
00:06:05,681 --> 00:06:07,641
How do you know that's you?
67
00:06:07,721 --> 00:06:10,721
- Well, I'm the oldest, you can...
- Sit down.
68
00:06:12,961 --> 00:06:16,161
Well, there's some more writing.
Give me my glasses.
69
00:06:20,681 --> 00:06:22,281
(BLOWING)
70
00:06:33,281 --> 00:06:35,881
No wonder I couldn't tell
which was you!
71
00:06:35,961 --> 00:06:38,121
Here, you read it.
72
00:06:40,601 --> 00:06:45,161
"Dear Ollie, I forgot to tell you
that after you and Stan left home
73
00:06:45,241 --> 00:06:47,361
"your twin brothers Alf and Bert
74
00:06:47,441 --> 00:06:50,481
"turned out to be bad lads
and ran away to sea,
75
00:06:50,561 --> 00:06:53,721
"and I did hear they joined a mutiny
on board one night
76
00:06:53,801 --> 00:06:55,801
"and they both got hanged."
77
00:06:55,881 --> 00:06:57,841
"Oh, isn't that terrible?
78
00:06:57,921 --> 00:07:00,681
"Let this be a lesson to you. Mother."
79
00:07:00,761 --> 00:07:04,041
- Hmm.
- Isn't that calamitous?
80
00:07:04,121 --> 00:07:06,721
- What a disgrace to our parents.
- (SIGHS)
81
00:07:06,801 --> 00:07:08,361
If poor Father ever...
82
00:07:08,921 --> 00:07:11,521
- Where are you going?
- I'm going to show it to Bubbles.
83
00:07:11,601 --> 00:07:13,841
- (CHOKES) Come here.
- What?
84
00:07:13,921 --> 00:07:16,681
- Are you crazy?
- Uh-uh.
85
00:07:19,041 --> 00:07:22,521
If our wives find out that we had
a couple of low-down brothers
86
00:07:22,601 --> 00:07:24,681
like that,
they'd divorce us immediately.
87
00:07:24,761 --> 00:07:26,681
We'd lose our prestige in town
88
00:07:26,761 --> 00:07:30,001
and be ostracised
by the rest of the community.
89
00:07:32,081 --> 00:07:35,121
- Well, why would they...
- Oh! (SHUSHES)
90
00:07:35,201 --> 00:07:36,801
Why would they feel like that?
91
00:07:36,881 --> 00:07:39,241
Everybody has a black sheep
in their closet.
92
00:07:39,321 --> 00:07:41,281
Nevertheless,
93
00:07:41,361 --> 00:07:46,441
don't you tell a soul about this
because if you do, we'll be sunk.
94
00:07:48,881 --> 00:07:51,561
If it's that serious maybe
we'd better burn the evidence.
95
00:07:51,641 --> 00:07:53,561
BOTH: Then nobody will ever know.
96
00:07:53,641 --> 00:07:56,361
- Shakespeare.
- Long... Not now!
97
00:07:56,441 --> 00:07:58,561
- Have you got a match?
- Yes.
98
00:07:59,241 --> 00:08:00,601
(SHUSHES)
99
00:08:06,521 --> 00:08:08,241
We'll burn our past behind us.
100
00:08:08,321 --> 00:08:11,161
- DAPHNE: Come on, Betty!
- Oh! Here.
101
00:08:11,241 --> 00:08:14,281
DAPHNE: We'll be right down,
Mrs Addlequist!
102
00:08:14,761 --> 00:08:16,641
(WHIMPERING)
103
00:08:19,041 --> 00:08:21,201
- Oh! Hello, dear!
- Where's Mrs Addlequist?
104
00:08:21,281 --> 00:08:23,041
- (DOORBELL)
- Why, I don't know sweetheart.
105
00:08:23,121 --> 00:08:25,161
We have to go now.
106
00:08:25,241 --> 00:08:27,801
- I'm sorry, dear. Goodbye.
- (OVERLAPPING CHATTER)
107
00:08:28,841 --> 00:08:30,321
Goodbye, lover.
108
00:08:30,401 --> 00:08:34,361
DAPHNE: Come along, girls,
we're going to be late!
109
00:08:34,441 --> 00:08:36,841
- Goodbye!
- (DOOR CLOSES)
110
00:08:47,081 --> 00:08:50,081
(HORN BLOWING)
111
00:08:53,721 --> 00:08:55,801
Stand by your line!
112
00:08:58,841 --> 00:09:02,401
Hey, mate, get busy
and unload the livestock.
113
00:09:02,481 --> 00:09:05,281
- We sail in the morning with the tide.
- Aye, sir!
114
00:09:09,721 --> 00:09:12,161
- Did you get paid, Bert?
- I sure did.
115
00:09:12,241 --> 00:09:15,321
Well, as soon as we get through eating
we'll go ashore and have a swell time.
116
00:09:15,401 --> 00:09:17,721
- All right.
- FINN: And come back broke as usual.
117
00:09:17,801 --> 00:09:19,441
Oh, I don't know.
118
00:09:20,641 --> 00:09:22,041
Aren't you going ashore, Finn?
119
00:09:22,121 --> 00:09:24,321
Yes, just as soon as I get through
reading the paper.
120
00:09:24,401 --> 00:09:25,961
Any news?
121
00:09:26,041 --> 00:09:29,321
Yes. I was reading about a fellow
that started with nothing
122
00:09:29,401 --> 00:09:31,801
and in two years
he was worth a million dollars.
123
00:09:31,881 --> 00:09:33,281
- A million dollars.
- (SCOFFS)
124
00:09:33,361 --> 00:09:36,161
- How did he do it?
- Careful saving and wise investment.
125
00:09:36,241 --> 00:09:38,961
Just what I've been preaching
to you two for years!
126
00:09:39,041 --> 00:09:40,441
If you'd let me save your money,
127
00:09:40,521 --> 00:09:42,801
you'd both be worth a million dollars,
like this fellow.
128
00:09:42,881 --> 00:09:46,841
He's right, Bert. You know, when we
first came on this ship 15 years ago,
129
00:09:46,921 --> 00:09:49,481
if we'd had as much sense then
as we have now,
130
00:09:49,561 --> 00:09:51,241
we'd have let him
save our money for us
131
00:09:51,321 --> 00:09:54,001
and today we'd have been sitting
on the fat of the land.
132
00:09:54,081 --> 00:09:55,801
- Wouldn't we, Finn?
- Right.
133
00:09:55,881 --> 00:09:58,361
It's all right, but it's too late now.
134
00:09:58,441 --> 00:10:00,521
My lad, it's never too late.
135
00:10:00,601 --> 00:10:03,001
You were paid this morning
and now is the time to start.
136
00:10:03,081 --> 00:10:05,441
Why don't you let me hold it for you?
137
00:10:05,521 --> 00:10:08,281
You make the money,
I'll invest it for you
138
00:10:08,361 --> 00:10:11,761
and you'll be millionaires
before you can say "Jack Robinson".
139
00:10:11,841 --> 00:10:13,521
What do you say?
140
00:10:13,601 --> 00:10:17,281
That sounds swell to me.
What about you, Alf?
141
00:10:17,361 --> 00:10:19,961
It's okay with me, Bert.
How about you, Finn?
142
00:10:20,041 --> 00:10:22,881
- Why, it's a knockout!
- I think it's good too.
143
00:10:22,961 --> 00:10:24,921
Here's my money.
144
00:10:25,001 --> 00:10:28,441
Say, have you seen my money?
I put it in here just a minute ago.
145
00:10:28,521 --> 00:10:30,881
Remember, when you were
having your coffee there...
146
00:10:33,041 --> 00:10:36,441
Isn't that swell?
Now we're going to be millionaires.
147
00:10:36,521 --> 00:10:38,961
Say, who's this fella Jack Robinson
he's talking about?
148
00:10:39,041 --> 00:10:41,441
- I don't know.
- I never heard of him.
149
00:10:41,521 --> 00:10:43,881
40... 50... 74 bucks.
150
00:10:43,961 --> 00:10:47,841
Boys, I'm proud of you.
That's what I call determination!
151
00:10:47,921 --> 00:10:49,041
We're full of it.
152
00:10:49,121 --> 00:10:51,921
Of course, you'll have to have
a little pin money to spend on shore.
153
00:10:52,001 --> 00:10:54,241
After all,
it's all right to be careful
154
00:10:54,321 --> 00:10:56,881
but we've got to have
our little fling,
155
00:10:56,961 --> 00:11:00,001
just to break the monotony. (LAUGHS)
156
00:11:00,081 --> 00:11:01,881
(SIGHS)
157
00:11:03,201 --> 00:11:06,201
- There's a dollar between you.
- A dollar?
158
00:11:06,281 --> 00:11:08,721
We can't do much flinging on a dollar!
159
00:11:08,801 --> 00:11:11,601
Well, the less you fling
the sooner you'll be millionaires.
160
00:11:11,681 --> 00:11:13,641
He's right, Bert.
161
00:11:13,721 --> 00:11:15,801
- (INAUDIBLE)
- Oh, yes...
162
00:11:15,881 --> 00:11:17,761
What about a receipt for our money?
163
00:11:17,841 --> 00:11:21,801
You're right, my lad. I'm glad to see
you've got good business sense.
164
00:11:21,881 --> 00:11:23,921
A receipt. (COUGHS)
165
00:11:25,921 --> 00:11:31,201
"I owe you $74." Hmm.
166
00:11:33,361 --> 00:11:37,881
Just to make this binding,
you two boys sign there.
167
00:11:43,201 --> 00:11:46,081
"Bertie Hardy."
168
00:11:46,161 --> 00:11:50,121
"Alfie Laurel." Semi-comma.
169
00:11:50,201 --> 00:11:51,721
Thanks.
170
00:11:51,801 --> 00:11:55,881
Now everything is on the up and up.
171
00:11:56,921 --> 00:11:58,521
- Isn't that swell?
- Mmm.
172
00:11:58,601 --> 00:12:00,241
There's one thing
I want you to promise.
173
00:12:00,321 --> 00:12:01,521
- What's that?
- That you won't
174
00:12:01,601 --> 00:12:02,921
come and ask any of it back.
175
00:12:03,001 --> 00:12:08,281
You listen to this, when we make
an agreement, it is an agreement.
176
00:12:08,361 --> 00:12:10,121
Yeah, what we want you to do
177
00:12:10,201 --> 00:12:12,081
is to promise us
you won't give it to us back.
178
00:12:12,161 --> 00:12:14,281
- I promise.
- Get me a cup of coffee, Alf.
179
00:12:14,361 --> 00:12:16,561
- All right.
- Now we're gonna get somewhere!
180
00:12:16,641 --> 00:12:18,641
I guess, I'll get ready to go ashore.
181
00:12:20,081 --> 00:12:22,881
- Any orders, sir?
- Uh? Yeah, yeah.
182
00:12:22,961 --> 00:12:25,081
Send those two mugs
Bert and Alf up here.
183
00:12:25,161 --> 00:12:26,441
Aye, sir.
184
00:12:27,641 --> 00:12:29,801
Hey, you swabs,
the mate told me to tell you
185
00:12:29,881 --> 00:12:32,401
the Captain wants to see you
right away and make it snappy.
186
00:12:32,481 --> 00:12:34,481
Okay, Big Bob, we'll be right up.
187
00:12:37,241 --> 00:12:39,121
Come on, sailor.
188
00:12:39,201 --> 00:12:41,201
- Goodbye, Finn.
- Goodbye.
189
00:12:41,281 --> 00:12:45,721
Oh, wait a minute! I've taken a room
at Mrs MacGregor's on Tudor Avenue.
190
00:12:45,801 --> 00:12:48,641
If you run short of money, drop in
and spend the afternoon with me.
191
00:12:48,721 --> 00:12:50,681
- Okay, thanks. Goodbye.
- Goodbye.
192
00:12:50,761 --> 00:12:52,761
Bye.
193
00:13:02,521 --> 00:13:04,521
Barnum was right.
194
00:13:04,601 --> 00:13:06,001
(LOUD SCREECHING NOISE)
195
00:13:09,121 --> 00:13:10,761
(LOUD SCREECHING NOISE)
196
00:13:16,321 --> 00:13:19,841
Now, listen, this is what
I want to see you about.
197
00:13:19,921 --> 00:13:23,681
I'm expecting a small package to be
delivered to me here but I can't wait.
198
00:13:23,761 --> 00:13:25,481
I've got to get over to the customs.
199
00:13:25,561 --> 00:13:27,201
I want you two boys to stay here,
200
00:13:27,281 --> 00:13:30,041
get this package and bring it to me
at the Denker's Beer Garden.
201
00:13:30,121 --> 00:13:32,481
- I'll meet you there about four bells.
- Aye, sir.
202
00:13:32,561 --> 00:13:34,721
You know where
Denker's Beer Garden is?
203
00:13:34,801 --> 00:13:37,201
Aye, sir. It's on Fifth and Eighth.
204
00:13:37,281 --> 00:13:40,241
Yeah, catty corner between Sixth
and Seventh on Ninth.
205
00:13:40,321 --> 00:13:41,641
It's just across the way from...
206
00:13:41,721 --> 00:13:44,201
- You know where it is.
- Aye, sir.
207
00:13:44,281 --> 00:13:47,721
I hope I can rely on you to do this
thing for me.
208
00:13:47,801 --> 00:13:50,481
Captain, you can trust us insipidly.
209
00:13:50,561 --> 00:13:53,521
Well, I hope so because
it's a very important package.
210
00:13:53,601 --> 00:13:55,641
What's in the package, Cappy?
211
00:13:55,721 --> 00:13:59,521
None of your business what's in it.
Go on, get out of here.
212
00:13:59,601 --> 00:14:02,001
And don't call me Cappy.
213
00:14:08,921 --> 00:14:10,561
- Could you tell us where...
- Shh!
214
00:14:10,641 --> 00:14:14,521
Pardon us, officer, but could you
tell us where Denker's Beer Garden is?
215
00:14:14,601 --> 00:14:16,801
Sure, just around the corner there.
216
00:14:17,841 --> 00:14:19,641
Thank you.
217
00:14:23,241 --> 00:14:24,361
(GRUNTS)
218
00:14:24,441 --> 00:14:26,641
- Pardon me, officer.
- Me too.
219
00:14:26,721 --> 00:14:28,721
That's all right.
220
00:14:43,761 --> 00:14:45,521
(TILL BELL RINGS)
221
00:14:45,601 --> 00:14:48,001
Lil, looks like the fleet's in.
222
00:14:49,761 --> 00:14:51,761
I'm gonna have beer. What's yours?
223
00:14:51,841 --> 00:14:54,441
Say, we've gotta take it easy,
you know we've only got a dollar.
224
00:14:54,521 --> 00:14:57,001
I know it. What are you gonna have?
225
00:14:57,081 --> 00:15:01,201
Suppose we share the same beer?
Then we won't spend so much money.
226
00:15:01,281 --> 00:15:03,281
That's a good idea.
227
00:15:03,641 --> 00:15:04,881
(KNOCKING ON TABLE)
228
00:15:05,161 --> 00:15:07,361
- (SNAPPING FINGERS)
- Garcon! Garcon!
229
00:15:07,441 --> 00:15:11,321
What do you mean, "Garcon"?
Grogan's the name. What'll you have?
230
00:15:11,401 --> 00:15:13,561
Why, I'd like a nice,
231
00:15:13,641 --> 00:15:15,721
large, cold,
232
00:15:15,801 --> 00:15:17,801
flagon of beer.
233
00:15:18,721 --> 00:15:20,041
What's yours?
234
00:15:20,121 --> 00:15:22,961
Bring me two nice, clean straws
that haven't been used.
235
00:15:28,921 --> 00:15:31,081
I wonder what's in that package.
236
00:15:31,161 --> 00:15:35,801
Didn't you hear what the Captain said?
That's none of your business.
237
00:15:35,881 --> 00:15:39,601
Always prying
into other people's affairs!
238
00:15:47,841 --> 00:15:51,041
(WHISTLES)
239
00:15:52,841 --> 00:15:54,961
Isn't that a pip?
240
00:15:55,041 --> 00:15:57,241
(WHISTLES) It certainly is.
241
00:15:57,321 --> 00:16:00,161
You know, that must
have cost more than $5.
242
00:16:00,241 --> 00:16:04,881
What do you mean $5?
Why, if it cost a penny it cost $50!
243
00:16:04,961 --> 00:16:06,201
Huh.
244
00:16:29,041 --> 00:16:31,001
That'll be a quarter.
245
00:16:31,081 --> 00:16:33,081
A quarter! What for?
246
00:16:33,161 --> 00:16:36,521
Ten cents for the beer
and 15 cents for the straws.
247
00:16:36,601 --> 00:16:39,001
15 cents for the straws?
248
00:16:39,081 --> 00:16:42,201
Well, you don't think
we're giving 'em away, do you?
249
00:16:44,561 --> 00:16:48,321
Waiter, could you exchange this
for a couple of spoons?
250
00:16:52,441 --> 00:16:53,681
(SILVERWARE CLATTERS)
251
00:16:56,201 --> 00:16:59,081
Give me those straws,
I'm gonna get to the bottom of this.
252
00:17:06,641 --> 00:17:07,961
(BLOWS)
253
00:17:12,601 --> 00:17:15,561
Oh, I'm sorry. Just a little accident.
254
00:17:15,641 --> 00:17:18,801
Oh, that's perfectly all right.
Accidents will happen.
255
00:17:18,881 --> 00:17:20,641
(GIGGLES)
256
00:17:20,721 --> 00:17:24,921
If I've spoiled your drink,
may I buy you another?
257
00:17:25,001 --> 00:17:27,841
We don't mind if you do.
Won't you join us?
258
00:17:27,921 --> 00:17:29,641
Oh!
259
00:17:29,721 --> 00:17:31,681
We don't mind if we do.
260
00:17:31,761 --> 00:17:34,361
Thank you. Come, Alfie.
261
00:17:42,601 --> 00:17:47,521
My name is Mr Hardy and this is
my very good friend Mr Laurel.
262
00:17:47,601 --> 00:17:51,161
I'm glad to know you.
This is my very good friend Lily.
263
00:17:51,241 --> 00:17:53,601
- How do you do, Lily?
- How do you do?
264
00:17:54,641 --> 00:17:56,841
And my name is Alice.
265
00:17:56,921 --> 00:17:59,001
Alice.
266
00:18:01,161 --> 00:18:03,481
My mother's name was Alice.
267
00:18:05,481 --> 00:18:07,241
(INHALES)
268
00:18:07,321 --> 00:18:08,721
(SIGHS)
269
00:18:09,881 --> 00:18:12,121
Your mother's name wasn't Alice.
270
00:18:12,201 --> 00:18:15,801
That was her second name
on my father's side.
271
00:18:19,161 --> 00:18:21,841
Hey, Joe, I want you to meet
a couple of pals of ours,
272
00:18:21,921 --> 00:18:23,281
Mr Laurel and Mr Hardy.
273
00:18:23,361 --> 00:18:25,241
Well, I met 'em a little while ago.
So what?
274
00:18:25,321 --> 00:18:27,281
Two more beers for the ladies,
right away.
275
00:18:27,361 --> 00:18:29,041
I don't think
we'll have any more beers.
276
00:18:29,121 --> 00:18:32,401
Oh, you must have something, Alice.
277
00:18:32,481 --> 00:18:35,361
Well, if you insist,
I'll have an absinthe frappe.
278
00:18:35,441 --> 00:18:37,401
I think I'll have the same.
279
00:18:37,481 --> 00:18:39,761
You couldn't split one, could you?
280
00:18:39,841 --> 00:18:41,801
What about something to eat?
281
00:18:41,881 --> 00:18:43,081
What have you got ready?
282
00:18:43,161 --> 00:18:45,521
Well, we got a quarter pound steak
just coming off the fire.
283
00:18:45,601 --> 00:18:47,281
- That's okay.
- And you?
284
00:18:47,361 --> 00:18:50,681
I'll have a Lobster Newburg,
mock turtle soup,
285
00:18:50,761 --> 00:18:52,921
a New York cut steak, well-done,
286
00:18:53,001 --> 00:18:56,721
lyonnaise potatoes, broccoli
with hollandaise sauce on the side,
287
00:18:56,801 --> 00:18:58,801
a head of lettuce
with Roquefort cheese dressing,
288
00:18:58,881 --> 00:19:00,121
heavy on the Roquefort
289
00:19:00,201 --> 00:19:02,761
coffee, uh, demitasse
and I think that will be all.
290
00:19:02,841 --> 00:19:04,721
Don't you want any dessert?
291
00:19:04,801 --> 00:19:06,921
Oh, that's sweet of you.
Crepe suzette.
292
00:19:07,001 --> 00:19:09,001
LILY: Make that two.
293
00:19:09,081 --> 00:19:10,481
(CRACK)
294
00:19:11,401 --> 00:19:13,401
Excuse me just a moment.
295
00:19:14,601 --> 00:19:16,321
(INAUDIBLE)
296
00:19:16,401 --> 00:19:21,801
Uh, will you pardon us? My friend
wishes to speak to me in private.
297
00:19:21,881 --> 00:19:25,001
- Go right ahead.
- We'll be right back.
298
00:19:30,801 --> 00:19:34,321
Let's go in there, we can talk
private, nobody will hear us.
299
00:19:45,081 --> 00:19:47,081
(GRUNTS)
300
00:19:48,961 --> 00:19:50,241
What do you want to tell me?
301
00:19:50,401 --> 00:19:52,201
What about them ordering
all that food?
302
00:19:52,281 --> 00:19:54,041
You know, we've only got 75 cents.
303
00:19:54,121 --> 00:19:56,761
Don't worry about that.
I've got it all figured out.
304
00:19:56,841 --> 00:19:59,041
We'll go over and see Finn
and get our money back.
305
00:19:59,121 --> 00:20:01,641
Well, we won't give us our money back.
You know, we told him...
306
00:20:01,721 --> 00:20:04,561
Oh, yes he will give it back.
I know how to handle him.
307
00:20:04,641 --> 00:20:07,881
And, besides, it's our money
and we'll do what we like with it.
308
00:20:07,961 --> 00:20:10,601
Well, I thought we were going to start
saving and be millionaires.
309
00:20:10,681 --> 00:20:13,001
We can start saving on the next trip.
310
00:20:13,081 --> 00:20:15,241
Now, we've got a chance
to have a swell time
311
00:20:15,321 --> 00:20:17,121
so we might as well
take advantage of it.
312
00:20:17,281 --> 00:20:18,961
You know, we only live once.
313
00:20:19,041 --> 00:20:22,441
I guess you're right.
We can be millionaires any time.
314
00:20:22,521 --> 00:20:25,361
Any old time.
Now let's go back to the girls.
315
00:20:25,441 --> 00:20:27,921
(TELEPHONE RINGING)
316
00:20:29,641 --> 00:20:31,201
- Hello?
- Hello.
317
00:20:31,281 --> 00:20:33,521
- Who is it?
- It's me.
318
00:20:33,601 --> 00:20:34,601
What do you want?
319
00:20:34,681 --> 00:20:36,321
I don't want anything,
what do you want?
320
00:20:36,401 --> 00:20:39,761
- I don't want anything, you rang.
- I didn't do anything of the kind.
321
00:20:39,841 --> 00:20:41,161
- You certainly did...
- I did...
322
00:20:41,241 --> 00:20:43,881
Put that back on the hook
and get out of here.
323
00:20:43,961 --> 00:20:45,881
(RINGING)
324
00:20:45,961 --> 00:20:49,841
(SLURRING) Hey! Would you chaps mind
stepping out a minute?
325
00:20:49,921 --> 00:20:51,561
That call is for me.
326
00:20:52,881 --> 00:20:57,681
Hey! Stay where you are, I'll get it,
it'll only take a second.
327
00:21:00,521 --> 00:21:02,841
You know, I'm sorry
to disturb you boys
328
00:21:02,921 --> 00:21:04,601
but this call is from the wife.
329
00:21:04,681 --> 00:21:08,641
You know, I have to tell her
I'm bringing home the milk.
330
00:21:14,921 --> 00:21:16,681
Would you rather we'd step out
a minute?
331
00:21:16,761 --> 00:21:19,681
No, stay where you are,
I'll just be a second.
332
00:21:19,761 --> 00:21:21,761
(RINGING)
333
00:21:24,161 --> 00:21:26,481
Hello! (GRUNTS)
334
00:21:28,641 --> 00:21:31,521
I lost it. Where is it? Where'd you...
335
00:21:31,601 --> 00:21:33,041
Right here, sir.
336
00:21:33,121 --> 00:21:35,761
- You won't talk long?
- I won't.
337
00:21:35,841 --> 00:21:38,161
Listen, I'm bringing home the...
Wait a minute.
338
00:21:38,241 --> 00:21:40,201
- Pardon me, will ya?
- Yes, sir.
339
00:21:40,281 --> 00:21:44,401
Just a minute! It's a little...
I don't know, it's so crowded.
340
00:21:44,481 --> 00:21:46,401
Here, could you...
341
00:21:47,121 --> 00:21:51,081
It's just... Oh. Hello?
Just a minute now. I'll get this.
342
00:21:51,161 --> 00:21:53,841
Hello? I'm calling about...
343
00:21:53,921 --> 00:21:57,721
I think somebody took the phone.
Wait a minute.
344
00:21:57,801 --> 00:22:01,361
Hello, Sarah. Yes. How much?
345
00:22:01,441 --> 00:22:03,801
Just a minute. Hello!
346
00:22:05,761 --> 00:22:08,521
Boys, just a minute. Listen.
347
00:22:08,601 --> 00:22:11,361
Just... I'll pull the wire.
348
00:22:11,441 --> 00:22:14,201
I'll... Oh, I lost it!
Where's the thing?
349
00:22:14,281 --> 00:22:17,801
Where you got that thing?
Do you got it? Are you hurt?
350
00:22:19,081 --> 00:22:22,041
I'll get it. Hello?
351
00:22:22,121 --> 00:22:24,601
- (YELLS)
- MAN: Boy, it's warm in here.
352
00:22:24,681 --> 00:22:28,801
Just a minute, something's on my foot.
Can you hold the wire?
353
00:22:28,881 --> 00:22:31,681
Wait a minute, I can't find the...
354
00:22:31,761 --> 00:22:33,761
Hello?
355
00:22:33,841 --> 00:22:35,801
Hello? Can you...
356
00:22:41,561 --> 00:22:44,521
(ALL YELLING)
357
00:23:02,881 --> 00:23:06,801
- Hey, what's the big idea?
- Sorry, sir, just a little accident.
358
00:23:06,881 --> 00:23:09,481
Yeah, well, accident or no accident,
you'll pay for this.
359
00:23:09,561 --> 00:23:11,321
Just put it on the check, please.
360
00:23:11,401 --> 00:23:14,441
- Don't worry, it'll be on there.
- Come, Alf.
361
00:23:15,201 --> 00:23:18,201
Hey, Joe, come here and give me
a hand with this, will you please?
362
00:23:18,881 --> 00:23:20,561
What happened? Did you get in a fight?
363
00:23:20,641 --> 00:23:22,561
Oh, no, we were just having
a little conference.
364
00:23:22,641 --> 00:23:25,001
- Nothing serious, I hope?
- Oh, no. Nothing serious.
365
00:23:25,081 --> 00:23:28,041
We've just decided
that if you girls don't mind,
366
00:23:28,121 --> 00:23:29,841
we'll go to the ship
and change our clothes
367
00:23:29,921 --> 00:23:31,441
and take you out for a good time.
368
00:23:31,521 --> 00:23:34,561
- That's okay with me.
- Me too! But don't be gone too long.
369
00:23:34,641 --> 00:23:36,601
- Oh, we won't.
- Don't go away, will you?
370
00:23:36,681 --> 00:23:37,721
'Cos we're coming back.
371
00:23:37,801 --> 00:23:39,041
- You bet we won't.
- Goodbye.
372
00:23:39,121 --> 00:23:40,721
Goodbye, Alice.
We'll be back in a jiffy.
373
00:23:42,521 --> 00:23:43,721
Hey,
374
00:23:43,801 --> 00:23:46,161
- where do you guys think you're going?
- (SHUSHES)
375
00:23:46,441 --> 00:23:49,801
We're going down to the ship to change
our clothes and get some more money.
376
00:23:49,881 --> 00:23:50,881
More money?
377
00:23:50,961 --> 00:23:53,361
Yeah, you see we didn't have enough
when we met the ladies.
378
00:23:53,441 --> 00:23:55,641
HARDY: Yes, sir, and while we're gone,
379
00:23:55,721 --> 00:23:59,801
see that the little ladies have
everything their little hearts desire.
380
00:23:59,881 --> 00:24:02,561
- Goodbye.
- Goodbye.
381
00:24:03,521 --> 00:24:06,321
Now, don't go away, will you?
We won't be long.
382
00:24:06,841 --> 00:24:09,241
Come on, don't dilly-dally!
383
00:24:09,321 --> 00:24:11,081
You're always fiddling around.
384
00:24:15,521 --> 00:24:17,841
Just a minute,
you think I'm such a sap
385
00:24:17,921 --> 00:24:20,561
that I'd let you get away
from here without paying that bill?
386
00:24:20,641 --> 00:24:22,041
Now, you either give me that dough
387
00:24:22,121 --> 00:24:24,441
or I'll beat you both up
or I'll have you pinched.
388
00:24:24,521 --> 00:24:27,161
Or maybe I'll beat you both up
and have you pinched too!
389
00:24:27,281 --> 00:24:29,201
Can't you make up your mind?
390
00:24:29,281 --> 00:24:32,281
Look, my good man,
don't you understand? It's simple.
391
00:24:32,361 --> 00:24:34,561
We're going to the boat, get our money
392
00:24:34,641 --> 00:24:36,601
- and come back and pay you.
- See?
393
00:24:36,681 --> 00:24:39,521
No, you're not. You ain't gonna
leave here until you pay me that bill,
394
00:24:39,601 --> 00:24:41,441
or leave me something for security.
395
00:24:41,801 --> 00:24:43,801
Why don't you leave him the ring?
396
00:24:43,881 --> 00:24:46,321
Then we get our money from Finn,
come back to pick it up
397
00:24:46,401 --> 00:24:48,201
and the Captain won't be
any the wiser.
398
00:24:48,281 --> 00:24:51,401
- Splendid.
- We've just figured out a plan.
399
00:24:51,481 --> 00:24:53,241
You'll like this.
400
00:24:55,201 --> 00:24:57,241
How about that for security?
401
00:24:58,041 --> 00:24:59,641
(WHISTLES)
402
00:24:59,721 --> 00:25:01,961
(WHISTLES) Isn't that a daisy?
403
00:25:02,041 --> 00:25:04,881
- It's all right with me.
- Now remember.
404
00:25:04,961 --> 00:25:10,081
When we come back and pay you
we get that ring back, right?
405
00:25:10,961 --> 00:25:12,961
- Right.
- Right.
406
00:25:22,601 --> 00:25:24,601
(KNOCK AT DOOR)
407
00:25:26,121 --> 00:25:28,281
(KNOCK AT DOOR)
408
00:25:28,361 --> 00:25:30,161
(CLEARS THROAT) Who is it?
409
00:25:31,601 --> 00:25:34,321
- It's us.
- Oh, hello, boys, come on in.
410
00:25:34,401 --> 00:25:35,801
- Thank you.
- How are you, Finn?
411
00:25:35,881 --> 00:25:37,041
What's on your mind?
412
00:25:37,121 --> 00:25:40,641
We hate to disturb you
but we've come to ask a little favour.
413
00:25:40,721 --> 00:25:42,481
Now, what do you want?
414
00:25:42,561 --> 00:25:44,361
Well, we've just had the good fortune
415
00:25:44,441 --> 00:25:48,161
to meet two very charming
and refined young ladies.
416
00:25:48,241 --> 00:25:49,801
Yeah, Alice and Lily.
417
00:25:49,881 --> 00:25:51,761
So what?
418
00:25:51,841 --> 00:25:53,841
Well, if you don't mind,
we'd like to cancel
419
00:25:53,921 --> 00:25:56,681
our little financial arrangement
with you and get our money back.
420
00:25:56,761 --> 00:26:00,961
Yeah. You see, we decided to put off
being millionaires till the next trip.
421
00:26:01,041 --> 00:26:04,601
If it's your money you want,
I am not interested.
422
00:26:04,681 --> 00:26:07,001
Well, does that mean,
you won't give us our money back?
423
00:26:07,081 --> 00:26:08,441
I will not.
424
00:26:08,521 --> 00:26:10,801
But it belongs to us, besides,
we gotta have some money,
425
00:26:10,881 --> 00:26:12,761
we don't get pad
till we get to Singapore.
426
00:26:12,841 --> 00:26:15,321
Not one penny of it will you get.
427
00:26:15,401 --> 00:26:19,001
I made a gentlemen's agreement with
you to protect you from yourselves.
428
00:26:19,081 --> 00:26:21,201
You wouldn't want me
to go back on my word, would you?
429
00:26:21,281 --> 00:26:23,241
Well, we wouldn't mind, this time,
would we Bert?
430
00:26:23,321 --> 00:26:26,121
- No, we won't hold that against you!
- No, you can go ahead and do that.
431
00:26:26,201 --> 00:26:28,201
Get out of here and don't bother me.
432
00:26:28,281 --> 00:26:30,001
Well, if that's the way
you feel about it
433
00:26:30,081 --> 00:26:33,081
we'll be forced
to assert our prerogative
434
00:26:33,161 --> 00:26:36,081
and search this room.
435
00:26:36,201 --> 00:26:38,321
Go ahead and search, what do I care?
436
00:26:38,401 --> 00:26:41,601
You'll be sorry,
putting us to all this trouble.
437
00:26:55,601 --> 00:26:58,201
It's no use you looking around here,
438
00:26:58,281 --> 00:27:01,241
you can search from now until doomsday
and you'll never find it.
439
00:27:01,321 --> 00:27:03,801
Does that mean that
it isn't in this room?
440
00:27:03,881 --> 00:27:06,841
I wouldn't say yes
and I wouldn't say no.
441
00:27:10,321 --> 00:27:12,281
- You know what we can do?
- What?
442
00:27:12,361 --> 00:27:14,481
- We can...
- (SHUSHES)
443
00:27:15,561 --> 00:27:16,721
(SIGHS)
444
00:27:18,281 --> 00:27:21,281
We can steal his clothes
and we'll pawn them
445
00:27:21,361 --> 00:27:23,481
and we'll get enough money
to pay the bill.
446
00:27:24,561 --> 00:27:26,641
We're going to give you
one more chance.
447
00:27:26,721 --> 00:27:28,361
Do we get our money or not?
448
00:27:28,441 --> 00:27:30,641
Absolutely not.
449
00:27:32,001 --> 00:27:35,001
No! Oh! (GROANS)
450
00:27:35,081 --> 00:27:37,401
(FINN GRUNTING)
451
00:27:39,761 --> 00:27:42,681
Hey, come back! Hey, stop!
452
00:27:57,441 --> 00:28:00,481
Come on, you know
we've got to meet the wives.
453
00:28:02,481 --> 00:28:04,361
You stay outside.
454
00:28:04,441 --> 00:28:08,121
Asking the pawnbroker if he had
any second hand ice-cream cones!
455
00:28:54,961 --> 00:28:56,561
(PARPS)
456
00:29:01,201 --> 00:29:02,801
(PARPS)
457
00:29:07,641 --> 00:29:09,721
How much did you get?
458
00:29:11,801 --> 00:29:13,081
Two dollars.
459
00:29:13,161 --> 00:29:15,361
Well, that's not enough,
can't pay the bill with that.
460
00:29:15,441 --> 00:29:18,041
- The girls are still...
- Don't worry about that.
461
00:29:18,121 --> 00:29:20,241
I'll take charge
of this little matter.
462
00:29:20,921 --> 00:29:22,841
Come on.
463
00:29:25,881 --> 00:29:28,441
Say, maybe we better
talk to Finn from a distance.
464
00:29:28,521 --> 00:29:30,761
You know, he was pretty mad
when we left him.
465
00:29:30,841 --> 00:29:32,641
That's a good idea.
466
00:29:33,001 --> 00:29:34,601
(WHISTLES)
467
00:29:34,681 --> 00:29:36,641
BOTH: Oh, Finn!
468
00:29:37,201 --> 00:29:39,841
- Maybe he's asleep.
- I'll wake him up.
469
00:29:42,521 --> 00:29:44,201
(CLACK)
470
00:29:45,361 --> 00:29:46,761
(WINDOW OPENS)
471
00:29:50,361 --> 00:29:52,441
(YELLS IN PAIN)
472
00:29:52,841 --> 00:29:55,681
- We're back!
- Where's my clothes?
473
00:29:55,761 --> 00:29:58,121
- We pawned them!
- What?
474
00:29:58,201 --> 00:30:02,281
And if you don't give us our money
back, we won't give you the ticket!
475
00:30:02,361 --> 00:30:05,721
Yeah, and the ship'll sail
and you'll be left behind. See?
476
00:30:05,801 --> 00:30:09,481
All right, you give me the ticket now
and I'll give you your money back.
477
00:30:09,561 --> 00:30:12,521
- You cross your heart?
- You don't doubt me, do you?
478
00:30:12,601 --> 00:30:14,001
BOTH: Yes!
479
00:30:14,081 --> 00:30:16,041
Oh-ho!
480
00:30:16,521 --> 00:30:18,441
We'll be right up!
481
00:30:27,761 --> 00:30:31,721
Here's the ticket and there's
the two dollars to get your suit back.
482
00:30:31,801 --> 00:30:33,241
Now give us our money.
483
00:30:33,321 --> 00:30:35,881
I'll give it to you,
as soon as I can go and get it.
484
00:30:35,961 --> 00:30:37,201
Where is it?
485
00:30:37,281 --> 00:30:40,041
It's sewn up in the lining of my coat
you just pawned.
486
00:30:40,121 --> 00:30:42,641
Why didn't you tell us that before?
487
00:30:42,721 --> 00:30:44,921
Having us run around you
on a wild goose chase!
488
00:30:45,001 --> 00:30:46,921
Give me the ticket,
I'll go and get it myself!
489
00:30:47,001 --> 00:30:50,561
Oh, no. You've double crossed
me before. Once bitten, twice shy!
490
00:30:50,641 --> 00:30:53,481
- Give us the ticket...
- I've got it all figured out.
491
00:30:53,561 --> 00:30:55,241
Now, take off your clothes.
492
00:30:55,881 --> 00:30:58,921
- What for?
- One suit I'll wear to get down there,
493
00:30:59,001 --> 00:31:01,801
the other suit I'll pawn
to pay the interest on this ticket
494
00:31:02,161 --> 00:31:04,441
Oh, no you don't. Give me the ticket!
495
00:31:04,521 --> 00:31:05,721
(GRUNTING)
496
00:31:05,801 --> 00:31:07,761
Don't you come near me
or I'll swallow this ticket
497
00:31:07,841 --> 00:31:09,601
and you'll never get your money.
498
00:31:09,681 --> 00:31:11,241
- Give me that!
- (MUFFLED)
499
00:31:11,321 --> 00:31:14,201
No, don't swallow it now,
don't swallow it.
500
00:31:15,201 --> 00:31:18,281
All right, take off your clothes
and put them down there.
501
00:31:18,361 --> 00:31:19,801
Put them down.
502
00:31:19,881 --> 00:31:22,001
And no monkey tricks!
503
00:31:22,081 --> 00:31:25,281
Well, here's another nice mess
you've gotten me into.
504
00:31:25,561 --> 00:31:27,561
(WHIMPERING)
505
00:31:28,521 --> 00:31:31,001
I wonder what those girls
will think about us.
506
00:31:37,601 --> 00:31:39,561
BERT: Hey, Finn!
507
00:31:40,641 --> 00:31:42,321
Are you coming back?
508
00:31:42,401 --> 00:31:45,601
I wouldn't say yes
and I wouldn't say no.
509
00:31:46,721 --> 00:31:51,281
Oh, and if I see Alice and Lily
I'll give them your love.
510
00:31:51,361 --> 00:31:54,841
Maybe I'll give them a kiss for you.
(CHUCKLES)
511
00:32:12,201 --> 00:32:14,601
I wonder how much longer
they're gonna be.
512
00:32:14,681 --> 00:32:15,761
I don't know.
513
00:32:15,841 --> 00:32:18,881
BOTH: Are you sure this is the place,
they told us to meet them?
514
00:32:19,161 --> 00:32:21,201
- Shakespeare.
- Longfellow.
515
00:32:21,281 --> 00:32:23,521
- What goes up the chimney?
- Smoke.
516
00:32:26,081 --> 00:32:27,601
They make me sick...
517
00:32:27,681 --> 00:32:30,041
- Oh, darling!
- Oh, hello, sweetie!
518
00:32:31,081 --> 00:32:34,241
- I'm sorry we were late.
- Oh, we just got here.
519
00:32:34,321 --> 00:32:36,281
What have you boys been doing
with yourselves?
520
00:32:36,361 --> 00:32:38,161
Ollie, tell 'em where we went
this afternoon.
521
00:32:38,241 --> 00:32:40,961
Stan took me
to see a Punch and Judy show.
522
00:32:41,041 --> 00:32:42,961
First one I've seen since I was a kid.
523
00:32:43,041 --> 00:32:45,441
Hey, how about something to eat?
I'm famished.
524
00:32:45,521 --> 00:32:48,881
Oh, that's a good idea.
Why not go in here and have a bite?
525
00:32:48,961 --> 00:32:50,281
Oh, you don't wanna go in there,
526
00:32:50,361 --> 00:32:51,961
we know a better place
down the street.
527
00:32:52,041 --> 00:32:53,881
What's wrong with this place?
We'll go in here.
528
00:32:53,961 --> 00:32:56,841
- Oh, but dear...
- I said we'll go in here.
529
00:32:56,921 --> 00:32:58,321
Come along, Betty.
530
00:33:00,241 --> 00:33:03,081
Oh, this is a nice table.
Sit here, Betty.
531
00:33:03,841 --> 00:33:05,761
Let's go in the garden,
it's cooler out there.
532
00:33:05,841 --> 00:33:07,361
Ooh, all right, dear.
533
00:33:12,401 --> 00:33:14,441
OLLIE: How's this table?
DAPHNE: Oh, this is nice.
534
00:33:14,521 --> 00:33:16,441
- Yes.
- Better than being inside.
535
00:33:16,521 --> 00:33:18,441
Well, of all the nerve!
536
00:33:18,801 --> 00:33:20,121
(SNAPS FINGERS)
537
00:33:22,681 --> 00:33:24,681
Well, you got here at last, huh?
538
00:33:24,761 --> 00:33:26,401
What do you mean, got here at last?
539
00:33:26,481 --> 00:33:29,001
We weren't coming in
in the first place, were we?
540
00:33:29,081 --> 00:33:32,041
I wasn't.
What are you gonna have, Momma?
541
00:33:32,121 --> 00:33:35,561
A ham sandwich, mustard on the side
and a glass of beer.
542
00:33:35,641 --> 00:33:40,241
- What would you like, Bubbles?
- Now, don't rush me, lover.
543
00:33:40,321 --> 00:33:43,401
I think I'll have a nice
welsh rarebit.
544
00:33:43,481 --> 00:33:45,321
- One welsh rarebit.
- With cheese.
545
00:33:45,401 --> 00:33:46,961
- With cheese.
- What's yours?
546
00:33:47,041 --> 00:33:48,561
Uh, I think I'll...
547
00:33:48,641 --> 00:33:50,841
I know what you guys are gonna have.
548
00:33:56,561 --> 00:33:58,761
He's an awfully fresh waiter.
549
00:33:58,841 --> 00:34:02,081
Poppa, what did he mean,
"You got here at last"?
550
00:34:02,161 --> 00:34:03,361
I don't know, Momma.
551
00:34:03,441 --> 00:34:06,281
BOTH: We never met him
before in our lives.
552
00:34:06,761 --> 00:34:08,801
- Shakespeare.
- Longfellow.
553
00:34:08,881 --> 00:34:12,321
- What goes up the chimney?
- Santa Claus.
554
00:34:12,401 --> 00:34:13,561
Silly.
555
00:34:13,641 --> 00:34:15,121
(SNAPS FINGERS)
556
00:34:15,201 --> 00:34:16,561
(CHUCKLES)
557
00:34:23,761 --> 00:34:25,281
(CLATTERS)
558
00:34:29,361 --> 00:34:31,361
The welsh rarebit'll be
right up ma'am.
559
00:34:33,761 --> 00:34:35,601
Isn't that the way with men?
560
00:34:35,681 --> 00:34:37,481
Here we've known them all afternoon
561
00:34:37,561 --> 00:34:40,321
and they pick up with a couple
of perfect strangers!
562
00:34:40,401 --> 00:34:43,841
Well, they're not gonna
get away with it. Come on, Lily.
563
00:34:44,761 --> 00:34:45,841
(SILVERWARE CLATTERS)
564
00:34:47,281 --> 00:34:49,961
Say, listen big boy,
I don't think much of your taste,
565
00:34:50,041 --> 00:34:52,361
ditching us for a couple
of old frumps like these.
566
00:34:52,441 --> 00:34:55,401
I beg your pardon?
Do you know who you're talking to?
567
00:34:55,481 --> 00:34:57,881
Ah, sit down, old lady,
before you fall apart.
568
00:34:58,001 --> 00:34:59,601
- (GASPS)
- Oh, now, listen cutie,
569
00:34:59,681 --> 00:35:01,241
I don't think
that was very nice of you
570
00:35:01,321 --> 00:35:02,881
to walk out and leave us sitting here.
571
00:35:02,961 --> 00:35:06,121
I beg your pardon, madam,
but just what do you mean?
572
00:35:06,241 --> 00:35:08,841
What are you looking
so innocent about?
573
00:35:08,921 --> 00:35:11,521
- I'm not so innocent.
- You bet you're not!
574
00:35:11,601 --> 00:35:13,281
And if you're as guilty
as I think you are,
575
00:35:13,361 --> 00:35:14,921
you oughta be ashamed of yourself!
576
00:35:15,681 --> 00:35:17,721
No wonder
you didn't want to come in here.
577
00:35:17,801 --> 00:35:20,241
Thank goodness
I found you out in time.
578
00:35:20,321 --> 00:35:21,561
(YELPS)
579
00:35:21,641 --> 00:35:24,321
Oh, but I tell you,
that this is a frame-up!
580
00:35:24,401 --> 00:35:27,001
- We've never met these women, have we?
- Uh-uh.
581
00:35:27,081 --> 00:35:29,361
Oh, you've never met us? Joe!
582
00:35:29,441 --> 00:35:31,961
- Yeah?
- Who are these men?
583
00:35:32,041 --> 00:35:33,961
When they were here before
they called themselves
584
00:35:34,041 --> 00:35:35,321
Mr Laurel and Mr Hardy.
585
00:35:35,401 --> 00:35:38,081
That's all I want to know. Pay
the cheque and let's get out of here!
586
00:35:38,161 --> 00:35:39,881
Yes, pay it, we've been
waiting two hours,
587
00:35:39,961 --> 00:35:40,961
for you to bail us out.
588
00:35:41,041 --> 00:35:43,041
Bye-bye, babyface.
589
00:35:45,241 --> 00:35:48,081
So you went to
a Punch and Judy show, huh?
590
00:35:48,161 --> 00:35:49,561
Here's your bill.
591
00:35:50,281 --> 00:35:53,241
15 dollars and 60 cents for this?
592
00:35:53,321 --> 00:35:56,681
No, 60 cents for this and $15
for what you had in there before.
593
00:35:56,761 --> 00:35:58,841
- I should...
- Oh, pay the cheque!
594
00:35:58,921 --> 00:36:01,441
- But, my darling...
- I said, pay the cheque!
595
00:36:01,521 --> 00:36:04,281
- I'll pay the cheque.
- You better pay the cheque.
596
00:36:05,441 --> 00:36:08,801
Thanks. And here's the ring
you left for security.
597
00:36:12,361 --> 00:36:15,281
Oh, so you're buying rings now.
598
00:36:15,361 --> 00:36:17,641
I suppose that's part
of the frame-up too?
599
00:36:17,721 --> 00:36:19,321
Betty, I've had enough!
600
00:36:19,401 --> 00:36:22,801
And as for you, you can see
my lawyer in the morning.
601
00:36:22,921 --> 00:36:26,081
Oh, lover, I don't see how you could
ever have done this to me.
602
00:36:26,161 --> 00:36:29,121
I never was so humiliated
in all my life.
603
00:36:29,801 --> 00:36:31,761
- Glass of beer, please.
- Okay.
604
00:36:31,841 --> 00:36:33,961
(BETTY SOBBING)
605
00:36:34,361 --> 00:36:36,361
(TILL BELL RINGS)
606
00:36:42,601 --> 00:36:46,921
Well, well, well,
fancy meeting you here.
607
00:36:47,001 --> 00:36:48,921
Say, which is Alice and which is Lily?
608
00:36:49,001 --> 00:36:50,121
"Alice and Lily"?
609
00:36:50,201 --> 00:36:52,641
Why, are you sure
you know these gentlemen?
610
00:36:52,721 --> 00:36:57,001
Why, they're buddies of mine. Say,
where did you get the swell clothes?
611
00:36:57,081 --> 00:36:58,521
- "Clothes"?
- Yes.
612
00:36:58,601 --> 00:37:00,721
The last time I saw them
they had no clothes on.
613
00:37:00,801 --> 00:37:04,001
They had no clothes on!
Who is this man?
614
00:37:04,081 --> 00:37:06,641
I don't know, Momma. He's
an absolute stranger to us, isn't he?
615
00:37:06,721 --> 00:37:10,041
He certainly is. Who am I? Er, you.
616
00:37:10,121 --> 00:37:12,081
A stranger, eh?
617
00:37:12,161 --> 00:37:15,121
Oh, trying to make out
they don't know me!
618
00:37:15,201 --> 00:37:17,601
Well, you take a look at that.
619
00:37:18,401 --> 00:37:20,921
DAPHNE: (GASPS) Oh!
620
00:37:21,001 --> 00:37:24,721
BETTY: Oh! Oh!
621
00:37:24,801 --> 00:37:26,721
BOTH: Oh!
622
00:37:27,521 --> 00:37:30,721
That settles it.
Betty, we'll keep this as evidence.
623
00:37:30,801 --> 00:37:32,081
But, Momma, let me explain...
624
00:37:32,161 --> 00:37:35,121
Don't ever speak to me again,
you over-stuffed Casanova!
625
00:37:35,201 --> 00:37:38,121
- Come on, Betty!
- Goodbye, lover.
626
00:37:40,161 --> 00:37:43,521
- Do you realise what you've done?
- I don't care what I've done.
627
00:37:43,601 --> 00:37:45,201
Serves you right
for not introducing me.
628
00:37:45,281 --> 00:37:47,121
Besides, they weren't so hot anyway.
629
00:37:47,201 --> 00:37:50,361
Where did you pick them up?
Did you win them on a punchboard?
630
00:37:50,441 --> 00:37:52,801
- Do you know what I oughta do to you?
- No. What?
631
00:37:52,881 --> 00:37:55,161
I oughta bend every bone in your head.
632
00:37:55,241 --> 00:37:57,441
- Is that so?
- Yes.
633
00:37:57,521 --> 00:37:58,721
Hmm.
634
00:38:00,161 --> 00:38:01,561
Uh-oh.
635
00:38:01,681 --> 00:38:03,401
Take a look through that.
636
00:38:04,921 --> 00:38:06,401
(GRUNTING)
637
00:38:06,841 --> 00:38:08,601
(LAUGHS)
638
00:38:09,681 --> 00:38:11,921
(CLEARS THROAT)
Well, I'll be seeing you.
639
00:38:12,001 --> 00:38:14,161
Don't go. Sit down.
640
00:38:52,961 --> 00:38:54,561
- (GULPS)
- (BULB SHATTERS)
641
00:39:02,201 --> 00:39:04,441
(WHEEZES AND COUGHS)
642
00:39:10,881 --> 00:39:13,081
- (ELECTRICITY CRACKLES)
- (GROANING)
643
00:39:15,521 --> 00:39:17,401
(GASPS)
644
00:39:31,001 --> 00:39:32,961
One welsh rarebit.
645
00:39:43,281 --> 00:39:45,681
(SMASHING)
646
00:39:48,921 --> 00:39:50,321
(GASPS)
647
00:39:52,041 --> 00:39:54,321
- Who done this?
- BOTH: He did!
648
00:39:54,401 --> 00:39:55,761
- Oh!
- Hey!
649
00:39:55,841 --> 00:39:57,361
(GRUNTS) What?
650
00:39:57,441 --> 00:40:00,841
I'll get you for this. I'll get you
for this. I'll get you for this!
651
00:40:00,921 --> 00:40:02,961
(SMASHING AND BANGING)
652
00:40:07,161 --> 00:40:09,681
- Who was that fella?
- How should I know?
653
00:40:09,761 --> 00:40:11,441
When did you meet the two girls?
654
00:40:11,521 --> 00:40:13,761
What do you mean,
when did I meet the two girls?
655
00:40:13,841 --> 00:40:15,401
Well you must know
something about them,
656
00:40:15,481 --> 00:40:16,881
they knew us when we came in here.
657
00:40:16,961 --> 00:40:19,361
What are you talking about?
658
00:40:19,441 --> 00:40:21,641
You can confide in me,
I can keep a secret.
659
00:40:21,721 --> 00:40:23,321
- I wouldn't tell...
- Will you get this
660
00:40:23,401 --> 00:40:25,521
through that thick skull of yours,
661
00:40:25,601 --> 00:40:28,801
that I don't know those girls
and they don't know me!
662
00:40:28,881 --> 00:40:30,921
- Is that the truth?
- Why, certainly it's the truth.
663
00:40:31,001 --> 00:40:33,001
Well, we should go back and tell
Momma and Bubbles
664
00:40:33,081 --> 00:40:36,721
that we don't know anything about it,
and they've done us a terrible wrong.
665
00:40:36,801 --> 00:40:39,601
We'll do nothing of the kind.
666
00:40:39,681 --> 00:40:43,241
- I'm going to teach them a lesson.
- How do you mean?
667
00:40:43,321 --> 00:40:45,681
We're going to stay out all night
668
00:40:45,761 --> 00:40:50,001
and we're not going home
until they come to us and apologise.
669
00:40:50,081 --> 00:40:53,761
That's a good idea. We'll give 'em
enough rope so we can hang ourselves.
670
00:40:53,841 --> 00:40:56,961
Hello buddies, what's the trouble now?
671
00:40:57,041 --> 00:40:59,281
Oh, we just had a little
argument with the wives.
672
00:40:59,361 --> 00:41:01,121
Yes, you see, they don't understand us
673
00:41:01,201 --> 00:41:03,401
so we're going to teach them a lesson,
aren't we, Ollie?
674
00:41:03,481 --> 00:41:06,201
Yes, and we're
going to stay out all night.
675
00:41:06,281 --> 00:41:08,041
Yeah, till nine o'clock.
676
00:41:08,121 --> 00:41:11,001
You know, that's funny,
I'm in the doghouse too.
677
00:41:11,081 --> 00:41:13,401
Well, we're all in the same boat.
678
00:41:13,481 --> 00:41:16,081
Say, let's all make a night of it.
679
00:41:16,161 --> 00:41:19,001
That's a very potent suggestion.
680
00:41:19,801 --> 00:41:24,041
- BOTH: All for one and one for all.
- All...
681
00:41:24,121 --> 00:41:25,521
- Shakespeare.
- Longfellow.
682
00:41:25,601 --> 00:41:27,721
- George Washington.
- What goes down the flue?
683
00:41:27,801 --> 00:41:29,961
- A good slug of liquor.
- Right!
684
00:41:30,401 --> 00:41:31,681
Bartender!
685
00:41:31,761 --> 00:41:33,481
No more drinks.
686
00:41:33,561 --> 00:41:36,721
You've had too much
and you two guys haven't had enough.
687
00:41:36,801 --> 00:41:38,321
What do you mean
we haven't had enough?
688
00:41:38,401 --> 00:41:40,921
Now don't give me any of your lip
or I'll throw you all out.
689
00:41:42,201 --> 00:41:44,161
Look through there.
690
00:41:47,681 --> 00:41:49,281
Oh-oh!
691
00:41:53,761 --> 00:41:56,921
(BELL TOLLING)
692
00:41:57,001 --> 00:41:59,361
(SNORING)
693
00:42:13,641 --> 00:42:15,441
What time is it?
694
00:42:15,521 --> 00:42:19,241
Four bells, and all is still wet.
695
00:42:19,321 --> 00:42:21,521
Looks like Finn isn't coming back.
696
00:42:21,601 --> 00:42:23,761
I told you that an hour ago,
697
00:42:23,841 --> 00:42:26,241
but you had to give me
the argument about
698
00:42:26,321 --> 00:42:29,561
"Everything comes to him who waits".
699
00:42:29,641 --> 00:42:33,681
- What do you think we better do?
- That's entirely up to you.
700
00:42:33,761 --> 00:42:36,321
You thought of a way
to get us into this mess,
701
00:42:36,401 --> 00:42:38,521
now think of a way
to get us out of it.
702
00:42:38,601 --> 00:42:41,761
Well, the only way I can see
is to go back and get the waiter,
703
00:42:41,841 --> 00:42:43,441
take him over to the ship,
704
00:42:43,521 --> 00:42:46,441
have the Captain pay for the bill,
so he can get his ring back,
705
00:42:46,521 --> 00:42:48,641
then we'll pay the Captain
on the next trip.
706
00:42:48,721 --> 00:42:51,121
He might be
a little bit mad about it...
707
00:42:51,201 --> 00:42:54,321
That's a very, very, very good idea.
708
00:42:54,401 --> 00:42:57,041
But how are we
going to get to the waiter?
709
00:42:57,121 --> 00:42:59,321
We can't go in the street
dressed like this,
710
00:42:59,401 --> 00:43:01,201
why, we wouldn't get to first base.
711
00:43:02,201 --> 00:43:03,761
- Never thought of that.
- Hmm.
712
00:43:03,841 --> 00:43:05,161
Well...
713
00:43:06,801 --> 00:43:08,601
- Say, you know what?
- What?
714
00:43:08,681 --> 00:43:12,601
Why don't we dress up
like those guys in Singapore?
715
00:43:12,921 --> 00:43:14,921
What guys in Singapore?
716
00:43:15,001 --> 00:43:16,761
The fellas that look like Eskimos.
717
00:43:16,841 --> 00:43:19,401
You know, the guys
that walk around with rugs.
718
00:43:19,481 --> 00:43:22,241
- Eskimos.
- Yeah, we could borrow these quilts,
719
00:43:22,321 --> 00:43:24,441
we could put some towels
round our heads
720
00:43:24,521 --> 00:43:26,401
and nobody'd be any the wiser.
721
00:43:26,481 --> 00:43:29,241
We could go down and get the waiter...
722
00:43:29,321 --> 00:43:31,921
Mmm-mmm. That sounds screwy to me.
723
00:43:32,681 --> 00:43:35,841
But any old port in a storm.
724
00:43:35,921 --> 00:43:37,201
It might be a good idea.
725
00:43:37,281 --> 00:43:39,521
You've gotta be right
once in your life.
726
00:43:42,921 --> 00:43:45,601
I'm looking for a couple
of sailors from the Periwinkle,
727
00:43:45,681 --> 00:43:48,241
a little fellow and a big fat one.
Have they been in here?
728
00:43:48,321 --> 00:43:51,121
You mean, the two guys
with the pearl ring?
729
00:43:54,361 --> 00:43:56,561
How did you know
they had a pearl ring?
730
00:43:56,641 --> 00:43:57,681
I saw it.
731
00:43:57,761 --> 00:43:59,001
They gave it to me as security
732
00:43:59,081 --> 00:44:01,201
and I gave it back to them
when they paid their bill.
733
00:44:01,281 --> 00:44:02,801
- Where are they now?
- Oh, I don't know.
734
00:44:02,881 --> 00:44:05,361
They got mixed up in here
with a drunk and I threw 'em all out.
735
00:44:05,441 --> 00:44:08,281
You'll probably find them in some
other joint, er, beer parlour.
736
00:44:08,361 --> 00:44:09,681
Thanks very much!
737
00:44:18,561 --> 00:44:20,681
Now, let me do the talking.
738
00:44:26,121 --> 00:44:28,721
- Good evening, Mr Grogan.
- Good evening.
739
00:44:28,801 --> 00:44:31,201
(CHUCKLES) It's possible
you don't recognise us
740
00:44:31,281 --> 00:44:33,721
- but we're the same two fellas...
- Oh, yes I do.
741
00:44:33,801 --> 00:44:35,761
What was the last thing
I said to you two guys?
742
00:44:35,841 --> 00:44:38,241
Didn't I tell you to get out
and stay out?
743
00:44:38,321 --> 00:44:41,561
No, the last thing you said was,
"Right!" Didn't he?
744
00:44:41,641 --> 00:44:44,081
Quit clowning now.
What is it you want?
745
00:44:44,161 --> 00:44:47,001
Well, we've figured out a plan
so we can get our ring back.
746
00:44:47,081 --> 00:44:48,321
Yeah, you see, the fellow...
747
00:44:48,401 --> 00:44:50,801
Oh, what are you two talking about?
748
00:44:50,881 --> 00:44:53,641
The ring,
the ring we left with you as security.
749
00:44:53,721 --> 00:44:55,921
Yes, and I gave you it back
when you paid your bill.
750
00:44:56,001 --> 00:44:58,961
- You didn't give anything back to us!
- We never paid any bill.
751
00:44:59,041 --> 00:45:00,201
What are you trying to do?
752
00:45:00,281 --> 00:45:02,481
Make me out a thief
and say I stole that ring?
753
00:45:02,561 --> 00:45:04,961
That's the way it appears to us.
754
00:45:05,041 --> 00:45:06,801
- You'd better give that...
- Shh.
755
00:45:08,761 --> 00:45:10,721
Look through that.
756
00:45:10,801 --> 00:45:12,761
Just a moment.
757
00:45:14,121 --> 00:45:15,721
(YELLING)
758
00:45:17,401 --> 00:45:19,201
Oh-oh!
759
00:45:26,641 --> 00:45:28,641
What?
760
00:45:32,801 --> 00:45:34,601
(SIGHS)
761
00:45:57,401 --> 00:45:58,441
(MOUTHS)
762
00:46:06,681 --> 00:46:08,481
- (THUDDING)
- (GROGAN GROANS)
763
00:46:10,841 --> 00:46:12,161
(INAUDIBLE)
764
00:46:23,281 --> 00:46:24,641
(GRUNTS)
765
00:46:24,721 --> 00:46:26,801
What are you trying to do?
766
00:46:26,881 --> 00:46:28,041
(GRUNTS)
767
00:46:31,681 --> 00:46:34,281
(POLICE SIREN WAILING)
768
00:46:37,321 --> 00:46:39,521
(EXCITED CHATTER)
769
00:46:42,201 --> 00:46:44,121
Mr Laurel!
770
00:46:45,281 --> 00:46:47,081
Mr Hardy!
771
00:46:48,721 --> 00:46:51,081
Hey, I'm not going in this thing!
772
00:46:51,161 --> 00:46:53,721
POLICEMAN: Get up! Get in!
773
00:46:53,801 --> 00:46:55,761
(DOGS BARKING)
774
00:46:55,841 --> 00:46:57,841
(SIREN WAILING)
775
00:47:02,721 --> 00:47:04,641
(TELEPHONE RINGING)
776
00:47:04,721 --> 00:47:07,281
If that's them,
tell 'em we're not home.
777
00:47:11,121 --> 00:47:12,481
Hello?
778
00:47:13,601 --> 00:47:14,801
(SQUEAKING)
779
00:47:16,801 --> 00:47:17,881
What?
780
00:47:20,881 --> 00:47:22,961
My goodness, don't tell me!
781
00:47:23,041 --> 00:47:24,601
(SQUEAKING)
782
00:47:24,681 --> 00:47:26,641
Oh, thank you very much!
783
00:47:26,721 --> 00:47:29,801
- What's the matter? What's the matter?
- That was Mrs Addlequist.
784
00:47:29,881 --> 00:47:33,641
Stan and Oliver have been arrested
and they haven't any clothes on
785
00:47:33,721 --> 00:47:36,521
and they're taking them
to the police station! Oh!
786
00:47:36,601 --> 00:47:38,721
Oh, this is a fine state of affairs!
787
00:47:38,801 --> 00:47:39,801
Oh!
788
00:47:44,401 --> 00:47:46,521
Come on, sit down there.
789
00:47:54,561 --> 00:47:57,681
(SPEAKING ARABIC)
790
00:48:08,441 --> 00:48:10,521
- What did he say?
- I don't know.
791
00:48:10,601 --> 00:48:13,281
- Do you speak Arabic?
- Oh, no, sir.
792
00:48:13,361 --> 00:48:16,081
We're a couple of Singapore Eskimos.
793
00:48:16,161 --> 00:48:18,161
Oh.
794
00:48:26,481 --> 00:48:28,521
- Oh, I'm awfully sorry.
- What's the idea?
795
00:48:28,601 --> 00:48:33,361
Sorry. Hey, Mr Clerk,
we'd like to see Judge Polk.
796
00:48:33,441 --> 00:48:36,001
- It's very important.
- Would you please give him this card.
797
00:48:36,081 --> 00:48:39,041
- I'll find out if he'll see you.
- Thank you.
798
00:48:40,241 --> 00:48:42,841
(GASPS) Oh, lover!
799
00:48:42,921 --> 00:48:45,881
- Oh...
- Betty! Betty!
800
00:48:45,961 --> 00:48:47,961
BETTY: Oh...
801
00:48:51,281 --> 00:48:53,641
- Come this way.
- Thank you. Come on, Betty.
802
00:48:56,161 --> 00:48:57,601
Did you see that?
803
00:48:58,321 --> 00:49:01,241
- I wonder who they are.
- I don't know.
804
00:49:01,321 --> 00:49:03,881
They're just a couple
of vacation killers.
805
00:49:03,961 --> 00:49:06,281
- Vacation killers?
- Yeah.
806
00:49:06,361 --> 00:49:08,401
A guy goes to jail
for a swell vacation.
807
00:49:08,481 --> 00:49:10,641
These welfare workers
post things and get him out.
808
00:49:10,721 --> 00:49:12,681
They make me sick.
809
00:49:12,761 --> 00:49:15,841
(SCOFFS) First time I ever
saw a welfare worker.
810
00:49:15,921 --> 00:49:18,121
- Me too.
- Funny-looking dames, aren't they?
811
00:49:18,201 --> 00:49:21,761
I don't know, I kinda liked
that big fat blonde. (CHUCKLES)
812
00:49:21,841 --> 00:49:24,481
- The little one wasn't so bad.
- Ah, cute.
813
00:49:24,561 --> 00:49:26,681
And you see, Judge,
it really is our fault,
814
00:49:26,801 --> 00:49:28,401
after all they're
members of your lodge
815
00:49:28,481 --> 00:49:31,401
and if you're not too harsh on them
I think they'll behave in the future.
816
00:49:31,481 --> 00:49:34,121
- I know my lover will.
- What do you mean?
817
00:49:34,201 --> 00:49:36,961
He's just as much to blame
as Poppa was! Believe me...
818
00:49:37,041 --> 00:49:39,321
- He's not!
- I think he started it!
819
00:49:39,401 --> 00:49:43,681
Now, now, now, don't worry,
everything's going to be all right.
820
00:49:43,761 --> 00:49:46,801
Now, if you ladies will step
into that room for a little while,
821
00:49:46,881 --> 00:49:48,561
I'll have a heart-to-heart
talk with them.
822
00:49:48,641 --> 00:49:50,601
Oh, Judge, you're so sweet.
823
00:49:51,041 --> 00:49:52,881
(BUZZER RINGING)
824
00:49:55,881 --> 00:49:58,521
Laurel and Hardy! Step this way.
825
00:50:01,361 --> 00:50:02,961
(LAUGHTER)
826
00:50:04,401 --> 00:50:06,641
(LAUGHING)
827
00:50:06,721 --> 00:50:09,361
Where on earth have you fellows been?
828
00:50:09,441 --> 00:50:12,081
And how in the world
did you get in those outfits?
829
00:50:12,161 --> 00:50:14,121
Well, you see Judge,
it was like this, we...
830
00:50:14,201 --> 00:50:16,121
You'll have to tell me later,
I haven't time now,
831
00:50:16,201 --> 00:50:18,001
I've got to open court.
832
00:50:18,081 --> 00:50:19,881
I don't know what you boys have done
833
00:50:19,961 --> 00:50:22,921
but whatever it is,
I'm going to overlook it this time.
834
00:50:23,001 --> 00:50:26,641
But you've got to behave yourself
and stop this gallivanting around.
835
00:50:26,721 --> 00:50:28,881
There's a time and place
for everything.
836
00:50:28,961 --> 00:50:30,001
Yes, sir.
837
00:50:30,081 --> 00:50:32,601
You've got two lovely girls,
who've done a lot for you.
838
00:50:32,681 --> 00:50:35,801
Why don't you appreciate them?
Will you do that?
839
00:50:35,881 --> 00:50:39,721
Well, whatever you say goes, Judge.
We're entirely in your hands.
840
00:50:39,801 --> 00:50:41,801
That's fine.
841
00:50:43,721 --> 00:50:45,361
Girls...
842
00:50:46,681 --> 00:50:49,001
I've just had a talk with the boys
843
00:50:49,081 --> 00:50:52,001
and I suggest
that you all get together.
844
00:50:52,961 --> 00:50:58,801
Come on, boys, give them a great big
kiss, and let bygones be bygones.
845
00:51:14,041 --> 00:51:16,001
Get off of him! You stay away.
846
00:51:16,081 --> 00:51:19,361
That's splendid. Well, see you later.
847
00:51:19,441 --> 00:51:21,161
Does that mean,
we have to come back here?
848
00:51:21,241 --> 00:51:23,241
Not if you behave yourselves.
849
00:51:23,321 --> 00:51:25,961
But my advice is to you is
stay out of beer gardens.
850
00:51:26,041 --> 00:51:28,521
If you want to have a good time
go to a high-class place
851
00:51:28,601 --> 00:51:31,081
where you'll be less liable
to get into trouble.
852
00:51:31,161 --> 00:51:33,281
Now, don't forget.
853
00:51:41,321 --> 00:51:42,681
Have you seen this one?
854
00:51:43,801 --> 00:51:45,961
Not now, some other time.
855
00:51:46,041 --> 00:51:47,881
(COUGHS)
856
00:51:50,561 --> 00:51:53,561
Here, we brought you some clothes.
857
00:51:53,641 --> 00:51:56,201
And, as soon as you're dressed,
we'll take the Judge's advice,
858
00:51:56,281 --> 00:51:59,081
we'll go to a nice high-class place
and have a good time.
859
00:51:59,161 --> 00:52:01,601
And if you promise never to get into
any more trouble,
860
00:52:01,681 --> 00:52:03,401
we'll forget all this happened.
861
00:52:03,481 --> 00:52:06,201
- Well, it's all right with me.
- Well, how about you?
862
00:52:06,281 --> 00:52:08,121
I'll do anything
to get out of this place.
863
00:52:08,201 --> 00:52:09,521
Lover...
864
00:52:09,601 --> 00:52:12,561
Oh, come on, we'll meet you outside.
865
00:52:16,801 --> 00:52:20,081
Hey, listen sailor,
lay off of the blonde.
866
00:52:20,161 --> 00:52:22,281
I saw her first.
867
00:52:31,041 --> 00:52:33,041
(BAND PLAYING)
868
00:52:51,921 --> 00:52:54,121
I wonder what our wives are doing.
869
00:52:54,201 --> 00:52:57,601
They're probably at home
crying their eyes out.
870
00:52:57,681 --> 00:52:59,361
It serves them right.
871
00:53:10,881 --> 00:53:14,561
- A table for four.
- Yes, madam. Come this way, please.
872
00:53:19,841 --> 00:53:21,561
(MOUTHING)
873
00:53:27,681 --> 00:53:29,601
I'm sorry, madam,
there are no ringside tables.
874
00:53:29,681 --> 00:53:31,441
I'll have to give you
a table on the balcony.
875
00:53:31,521 --> 00:53:33,561
That's all right.
876
00:53:54,001 --> 00:53:55,441
(YELLS)
877
00:53:58,361 --> 00:54:00,121
What's the matter with him?
878
00:54:00,201 --> 00:54:02,481
I guess he's trying to get away
without paying the bill.
879
00:54:02,561 --> 00:54:04,521
- He can't do that!
- No, sir!
880
00:54:04,601 --> 00:54:06,201
Where's my hat?
881
00:54:07,201 --> 00:54:09,361
- Is this it?
- Yeah, thank you.
882
00:54:09,441 --> 00:54:10,601
Quick!
883
00:54:13,361 --> 00:54:14,881
Whiskey and soda.
884
00:54:16,681 --> 00:54:18,161
Ooh!
885
00:54:18,241 --> 00:54:19,881
What's the matter?
886
00:54:20,361 --> 00:54:22,761
Say, you four guys stay away from me.
887
00:54:23,521 --> 00:54:26,401
We're not four guys,
there's only two of us!
888
00:54:31,561 --> 00:54:33,241
LILY: Well, look who's here.
889
00:54:33,321 --> 00:54:37,401
Well, Alice! What's the matter?
We can explain everything.
890
00:54:37,481 --> 00:54:39,041
You can't explain
those two old cronies.
891
00:54:39,121 --> 00:54:41,681
They're not old cronies, they're
a couple of old welfare workers.
892
00:54:41,761 --> 00:54:43,201
- Aren't they, Bert?
- Well, certainly.
893
00:54:43,281 --> 00:54:45,281
- You see, we picked...
- I'll tell them.
894
00:54:46,601 --> 00:54:49,041
- Oh, don't give me that.
- But honey, we can prove it!
895
00:54:49,121 --> 00:54:50,401
Well, sit down and have a drink.
896
00:54:50,481 --> 00:54:52,881
We will, as soon as we
get rid of these two old battle axes.
897
00:54:52,961 --> 00:54:55,401
- Yeah, we'll soon get rid of them.
- Is that so?
898
00:54:55,481 --> 00:54:58,281
We want you to meet the two girls
we met, this afternoon.
899
00:54:58,361 --> 00:55:01,121
- Yeah, Lily and Alice...
- I know all about them!
900
00:55:01,201 --> 00:55:05,081
You ungrateful hound. I'll fix you!
901
00:55:06,921 --> 00:55:09,201
You keep out of this,
you startled ant.
902
00:55:09,481 --> 00:55:11,241
(LAUGHS)
903
00:55:11,321 --> 00:55:14,121
(EXCLAIMING)
904
00:55:15,721 --> 00:55:16,961
Don't! (GROANS)
905
00:55:17,561 --> 00:55:19,881
(HAPPY BIRTHDAY PLAYING)
906
00:55:23,721 --> 00:55:27,281
Pardon me.
Hey, you, give me your hand.
907
00:55:30,521 --> 00:55:32,801
One, two, three!
908
00:55:37,841 --> 00:55:40,321
Happy birthday to you.
909
00:55:40,401 --> 00:55:44,681
- This isn't his birthday.
- Nevertheless, many happy returns.
910
00:55:45,001 --> 00:55:46,961
Come on, Betty, this is final.
911
00:55:47,041 --> 00:55:48,641
(KICKS)
912
00:55:55,761 --> 00:55:57,401
What did you wanna go help her for?
913
00:55:57,481 --> 00:55:59,321
Well, I didn't know
what she was going to do.
914
00:55:59,761 --> 00:56:03,841
That's right, you wouldn't.
Get this off.
915
00:56:07,801 --> 00:56:11,521
That's what you get,
picking up with strange women.
916
00:56:11,601 --> 00:56:13,401
Well, we got rid of 'em, didn't we?
917
00:56:13,481 --> 00:56:16,681
You girls pardon me while
I go downstairs and clean myself up.
918
00:56:16,761 --> 00:56:19,521
Alf, you entertain the ladies
while I'm gone.
919
00:56:20,401 --> 00:56:22,521
We'll be right back, Alice.
920
00:56:32,201 --> 00:56:35,441
Say, after this we'd better go home
and see if our wives are sorry...
921
00:56:35,521 --> 00:56:37,601
- Maybe, both...
- Don't worry about them,
922
00:56:37,681 --> 00:56:39,281
let them worry about us.
923
00:56:39,361 --> 00:56:42,161
We're gonna have the best time
tonight we have ever had.
924
00:56:42,241 --> 00:56:44,681
- Three cigars, please.
- Yes, sir.
925
00:56:44,761 --> 00:56:46,121
Thank you.
926
00:56:46,201 --> 00:56:47,641
- You'll have one?
- Thank you.
927
00:56:49,801 --> 00:56:51,961
- Good evening.
- Where's that package?
928
00:56:52,041 --> 00:56:53,641
- What package?
- That package
929
00:56:53,721 --> 00:56:55,481
containing the pearl ring.
930
00:56:55,561 --> 00:56:57,401
You've got that pearl ring,
haven't you?
931
00:56:57,481 --> 00:57:00,001
I have, and what business
is it of yours?
932
00:57:00,081 --> 00:57:02,201
- I'll soon show you...
- Now, just a minute.
933
00:57:02,281 --> 00:57:04,441
You'll have to lower your voices
or you'll be put out.
934
00:57:04,521 --> 00:57:06,481
Remember, we cater
to ladies and gentlemen here.
935
00:57:06,561 --> 00:57:08,401
All right, I understand.
936
00:57:08,481 --> 00:57:11,161
You double-crossing swab,
give me that ring.
937
00:57:11,241 --> 00:57:13,481
Are you trying to frighten me?
938
00:57:13,801 --> 00:57:17,121
Go ahead, little boy,
and peddle your fish.
939
00:57:18,601 --> 00:57:19,961
Oh!
940
00:57:20,041 --> 00:57:21,721
Want any more, huh?
941
00:57:22,681 --> 00:57:25,081
Now, wait a minute, wait a minute...
942
00:57:25,161 --> 00:57:29,401
You take your hands off me.
Take your hands off me!
943
00:57:29,481 --> 00:57:30,641
(SHIRT RIPPING)
944
00:57:37,561 --> 00:57:39,961
Put me out! (YELLS)
945
00:57:41,001 --> 00:57:43,361
(GLASS SHATTERING)
946
00:57:43,441 --> 00:57:45,441
CAPTAIN: Oh! Oh!
947
00:57:46,481 --> 00:57:50,401
That guy must be crazy.
Stanley, go and get the manager.
948
00:57:50,481 --> 00:57:52,961
And take that hat off! Go on.
949
00:57:53,041 --> 00:57:55,201
It must be Bert, I'll go and see.
950
00:58:06,441 --> 00:58:08,881
- What's happened?
- You know what happened.
951
00:58:08,961 --> 00:58:11,001
- Where's the manager?
- What manager?
952
00:58:16,601 --> 00:58:18,241
Beat it, beat it!
953
00:58:20,041 --> 00:58:22,761
Did you get that? He slipped
the ring in his pal's pocket.
954
00:58:43,321 --> 00:58:44,401
Here's the manager.
955
00:58:44,481 --> 00:58:46,281
So, you're trying to get away
from me, eh?
956
00:58:46,361 --> 00:58:48,201
- (INDISTINCT SHOUTING)
- I'll get you!
957
00:58:48,281 --> 00:58:50,601
This man's a lunatic!
He's trying to rob us!
958
00:58:50,681 --> 00:58:54,361
- Rob you? Why, you dirty crook!
- You'll have to settle this outside!
959
00:58:54,441 --> 00:58:56,801
No, this thing is gonna be
settled right here and now!
960
00:58:56,881 --> 00:58:59,361
You can't do that.
Go on, get out of my way!
961
00:58:59,441 --> 00:59:01,841
- Give me my ring!
- Take him out!
962
00:59:01,921 --> 00:59:05,561
- I'll get you!
- Take him! Get him out of here!
963
00:59:05,641 --> 00:59:07,481
Look, come on and stand up!
964
00:59:07,561 --> 00:59:09,561
Will you get... Just...
965
00:59:09,641 --> 00:59:11,001
What?
966
00:59:11,081 --> 00:59:15,761
- The trouble with him is he's drunk.
- That's just about the strength of it!
967
00:59:15,841 --> 00:59:19,801
- Take him. Get him.
- CAPTAIN: I'll get you!
968
00:59:19,881 --> 00:59:21,921
It's a good thing
we sent for the manager.
969
00:59:22,001 --> 00:59:23,401
It certainly was.
970
00:59:23,481 --> 00:59:26,841
Say, you better give me the ring back,
it'll be safer with me.
971
00:59:26,921 --> 00:59:29,521
What do you mean?
You didn't give me the ring.
972
00:59:29,641 --> 00:59:33,161
Yes, I did, I slipped it in your
pocket when I told you to beat it.
973
00:59:34,761 --> 00:59:36,721
I haven't got the ring.
You didn't give anything.
974
00:59:37,041 --> 00:59:40,081
OLLIE: What are you trying
to do, hold it back from me?
975
00:59:40,161 --> 00:59:43,041
Can you imagine that?
My pal, my bosom companion,
976
00:59:43,121 --> 00:59:44,441
trying to double-cross me!
977
00:59:44,521 --> 00:59:45,921
Excuse me, gentlemen,
978
00:59:46,001 --> 00:59:48,761
it's none of my business, but I saw
him put the ring in your pocket.
979
00:59:48,841 --> 00:59:50,641
- Why don't you give it up?
- What do you mean,
980
00:59:50,721 --> 00:59:52,521
you saw him put it in there?
I haven't got it!
981
00:59:52,601 --> 00:59:55,201
Pardon me for butting in
but may I speak to you alone?
982
00:59:55,281 --> 00:59:57,721
Why, sure. Pardon me.
983
00:59:57,801 --> 00:59:59,881
Would you like to have us
scare it out of him?
984
00:59:59,961 --> 01:00:01,201
How?
985
01:00:01,281 --> 01:00:03,041
We can make out
we're a couple of tough guys
986
01:00:03,121 --> 01:00:04,881
and pretend to take him for a ride.
987
01:00:08,881 --> 01:00:10,681
- (CHUCKLES)
- What did he say?
988
01:00:10,761 --> 01:00:13,961
These gentlemen have been kind enough
to invite us for a nice ride.
989
01:00:14,041 --> 01:00:17,481
- Would you like to go along?
- I'd love to, but what about the ring?
990
01:00:17,561 --> 01:00:22,121
Oh, just forget that. I was only
kidding! I've got it right there.
991
01:00:22,201 --> 01:00:24,081
Well, why didn't you say so?
You had me worried.
992
01:00:24,161 --> 01:00:26,441
As long as you guys
are going for a ride
993
01:00:26,521 --> 01:00:28,041
would you drop me off at home?
994
01:00:28,121 --> 01:00:31,041
- Sure, we'll be glad to drop you off.
- Thanks, pal.
995
01:00:31,121 --> 01:00:33,961
- Come on, boys, let's go.
- STAN: Gotcha.
996
01:00:34,041 --> 01:00:35,161
- Call a cab.
- Taxi!
997
01:00:39,321 --> 01:00:41,281
I hope it doesn't rain.
998
01:00:41,361 --> 01:00:43,961
(POLICE SIREN WAILING)
999
01:00:46,361 --> 01:00:48,521
Oh! There they go.
1000
01:00:49,521 --> 01:00:51,521
(SIREN WAILING)
1001
01:01:13,161 --> 01:01:14,241
Hmm.
1002
01:01:19,081 --> 01:01:20,761
- Did you get rid of him?
- Who?
1003
01:01:20,841 --> 01:01:22,441
- The Captain.
- The Captain?
1004
01:01:22,521 --> 01:01:23,761
I haven't seen him. Have you?
1005
01:01:23,841 --> 01:01:25,361
What do you mean,
you haven't seen him?
1006
01:01:25,441 --> 01:01:27,801
You told me to beat it
and he's been chasing me ever since.
1007
01:01:27,881 --> 01:01:29,881
Do you mean to tell me
that the Captain is in here?
1008
01:01:29,961 --> 01:01:31,841
What's the matter with you?
You saw the Captain,
1009
01:01:31,921 --> 01:01:33,601
- he's as mad as a firefly.
- Holy mackerel.
1010
01:01:33,681 --> 01:01:35,321
We've got to get out of here!
1011
01:01:35,401 --> 01:01:39,361
Oh, there you are! I've been
looking all over town for you.
1012
01:01:39,441 --> 01:01:42,041
- What happened to your face?
- You know well enough what happened!
1013
01:01:42,121 --> 01:01:44,521
If you think you can put mustard
on my head and burn my nose
1014
01:01:44,601 --> 01:01:46,121
and get away with it, you're crazy.
1015
01:01:46,201 --> 01:01:49,801
- What's he talking about?
- Before it was two to one.
1016
01:01:49,881 --> 01:01:53,081
Now it's three to two,
that makes it even.
1017
01:01:53,161 --> 01:01:55,081
You must be barmy.
We haven't seen you since...
1018
01:01:55,161 --> 01:01:57,921
- Barmy, am I? At 'em, boys!
- Whoa!
1019
01:01:59,361 --> 01:02:01,921
Listen to me, you go that way
and cut off their retreat.
1020
01:02:02,001 --> 01:02:03,521
- Okay.
- Come on, Snuffy!
1021
01:02:13,641 --> 01:02:15,601
Fooled you, didn't I?
1022
01:02:18,721 --> 01:02:21,081
Up aloft after them, Snuffy! Come on!
1023
01:02:27,801 --> 01:02:30,041
(CROWD CHATTERING EXCITEDLY)
1024
01:02:34,561 --> 01:02:36,201
(STAN WHIMPERS)
1025
01:02:42,921 --> 01:02:45,281
(CREAKING)
1026
01:02:53,001 --> 01:02:55,161
(SCREAMING)
1027
01:02:59,121 --> 01:03:00,841
(CRASHING)
1028
01:03:09,201 --> 01:03:11,161
(WHIMPERING)
1029
01:03:13,281 --> 01:03:15,241
There they go!
1030
01:03:18,201 --> 01:03:20,201
Come on, now!
1031
01:03:26,441 --> 01:03:29,441
(HORN HONKING)
1032
01:03:30,081 --> 01:03:31,281
That's the boss.
1033
01:03:37,121 --> 01:03:40,041
You did a very good job
getting rid of the cops. Stand by.
1034
01:03:40,121 --> 01:03:41,321
This way, gentlemen.
1035
01:03:41,401 --> 01:03:44,001
Say, what about our friend?
you forgot to drop him off.
1036
01:03:44,081 --> 01:03:46,321
Oh, he's asleep. We'll do that later.
1037
01:03:49,001 --> 01:03:50,561
(KNOCK AT DOOR)
1038
01:03:52,081 --> 01:03:53,681
- Hello, boss.
- Hello, Tiny.
1039
01:03:53,761 --> 01:03:55,401
Hello, boss.
1040
01:03:55,481 --> 01:03:57,561
Boys, I want you to meet
a couple of friends of mine.
1041
01:03:57,641 --> 01:03:59,441
- How do you do?
- How are you?
1042
01:03:59,521 --> 01:04:02,841
This lug's got a very valuable ring
and he refuses to give it up.
1043
01:04:02,921 --> 01:04:05,161
No, you're mistaken,
he's got the ring...
1044
01:04:05,241 --> 01:04:08,361
One of you guys knows where it is
and you'd better cough it up.
1045
01:04:08,441 --> 01:04:09,921
BOTH: I haven't got the ring!
1046
01:04:10,001 --> 01:04:11,761
- Shakespeare.
- Not now!
1047
01:04:11,841 --> 01:04:12,921
All right, you crooks,
1048
01:04:13,001 --> 01:04:15,721
if you won't tell us where it is,
we'll have to give you the works.
1049
01:04:15,801 --> 01:04:18,401
Go to it, Tiny. When you get
the dope, you know where to find us.
1050
01:04:18,481 --> 01:04:20,961
- All right, boss.
- I though we were going for a ride.
1051
01:04:21,041 --> 01:04:22,961
- Just a minute...
- Sit down.
1052
01:04:23,041 --> 01:04:24,841
But I wanna talk to these men, here.
1053
01:04:24,921 --> 01:04:25,961
Sit down!
1054
01:04:26,041 --> 01:04:28,241
All right, boys, mix up the cement.
1055
01:04:28,321 --> 01:04:29,761
- Sure, Tiny.
- Okey-dokey, Tiny.
1056
01:04:36,921 --> 01:04:38,481
What are you gonna do?
1057
01:04:38,561 --> 01:04:40,121
We're gonna put your feet in cement.
1058
01:04:40,201 --> 01:04:42,161
And if you don't talk
by the time it hardens,
1059
01:04:42,241 --> 01:04:44,241
we're gonna throw you off the dock!
1060
01:04:45,481 --> 01:04:47,281
Why don't you give 'em the ring?
1061
01:04:47,361 --> 01:04:49,801
(WHIMPERING) I haven't got the ring!
1062
01:04:49,881 --> 01:04:52,361
You told me you had it
when were in the bar!
1063
01:04:52,441 --> 01:04:56,641
I can't remember you giving it to me
in there and... Oh!
1064
01:04:59,121 --> 01:05:02,041
- (WHIMPERING)
- Hey, hey!
1065
01:05:07,321 --> 01:05:08,641
Listen, you go that way.
1066
01:05:11,081 --> 01:05:12,801
Where in tarnation did they go?
1067
01:05:12,881 --> 01:05:15,121
I don't know, they gave us the slip
on the last turn.
1068
01:05:15,201 --> 01:05:19,401
- We'd better get back to the ship.
- That's them there!
1069
01:05:19,481 --> 01:05:21,241
(BOTH YELLING)
1070
01:05:22,281 --> 01:05:23,561
(SIREN WAILING)
1071
01:05:29,601 --> 01:05:31,521
Good and hard now, Tiny.
1072
01:05:31,601 --> 01:05:33,521
- TINY: All right, take 'em out.
- Okay.
1073
01:05:33,601 --> 01:05:37,081
- (STAN WHIMPERING HYSTERICALLY)
- Oh! Be careful!
1074
01:05:37,161 --> 01:05:39,361
Oh! Oh!
1075
01:05:40,361 --> 01:05:42,161
Oh...
1076
01:05:42,241 --> 01:05:45,521
- No!
- You can't do this to us!
1077
01:05:52,041 --> 01:05:55,081
- (SHRIEKING)
- Oh-ho.
1078
01:05:57,481 --> 01:06:00,641
Stop that crying!
Now this is your last chance.
1079
01:06:00,721 --> 01:06:03,601
If you don't tell us where that
ring is, over you go.
1080
01:06:03,681 --> 01:06:06,281
(WHIMPERING) We don't know,
do we Ollie?
1081
01:06:06,361 --> 01:06:08,401
How can we tell you
if we don't remember?
1082
01:06:08,481 --> 01:06:11,201
- Maybe this'll help you remember!
- BOTH: Oh!
1083
01:06:11,881 --> 01:06:13,561
(LAUGHING)
1084
01:06:13,641 --> 01:06:16,121
(YELLING)
1085
01:06:16,201 --> 01:06:18,601
(STAN WHIMPERING HYSTERICALLY)
1086
01:06:23,081 --> 01:06:24,761
(BOTH SCREAMING)
1087
01:06:42,081 --> 01:06:43,521
(YELLING)
1088
01:07:12,601 --> 01:07:14,841
HARDY: Take this thing off of my head!
1089
01:07:14,921 --> 01:07:16,841
(STAN WAILING)
1090
01:07:18,761 --> 01:07:20,681
(YELLING)
1091
01:07:20,761 --> 01:07:23,361
(WHIMPERING HYSTERICALLY)
1092
01:07:26,961 --> 01:07:28,681
(BOTH YELLING)
1093
01:07:35,761 --> 01:07:37,601
OLLIE: Oh!
1094
01:07:40,801 --> 01:07:42,801
(BOTH YELLING)
1095
01:07:42,881 --> 01:07:44,881
(POLICE SIREN WAILING)
1096
01:07:50,121 --> 01:07:52,481
(SIREN SLOWS AND STOPS)
1097
01:07:52,561 --> 01:07:55,521
- Help!
- Help!
1098
01:07:55,601 --> 01:07:58,481
- There they are!
- Help!
1099
01:07:58,561 --> 01:08:01,441
- Come on.
- Help!
1100
01:08:24,441 --> 01:08:27,961
Now you swabs, give me that pearl ring
or I'll drown you like rats!
1101
01:08:28,041 --> 01:08:30,041
BOTH: We don't know where it is!
1102
01:08:30,121 --> 01:08:32,161
- Shakespeare.
- No, not now!
1103
01:08:32,241 --> 01:08:33,681
Let 'em go.
1104
01:08:33,761 --> 01:08:34,921
(BOTH SCREAMING)
1105
01:08:37,241 --> 01:08:38,681
Pull 'em up again.
1106
01:08:38,761 --> 01:08:41,161
Better give me another,
this is my last one I got.
1107
01:08:41,241 --> 01:08:43,761
Oh, wait it was here. Here's a boxful.
1108
01:08:48,201 --> 01:08:49,401
(WINCES)
1109
01:08:49,801 --> 01:08:52,601
- ALF: Where did that come from?
- Never mind where it came from.
1110
01:08:52,681 --> 01:08:55,161
We'll go find the Captain
and give it back to him. Come on.
1111
01:09:02,641 --> 01:09:04,761
Oh, Captain, there's your ring.
1112
01:09:04,841 --> 01:09:06,721
Oh, thanks very much.
1113
01:09:10,321 --> 01:09:12,441
(HOWLS)
1114
01:09:13,521 --> 01:09:15,801
(BOTH YELLING)
1115
01:09:21,881 --> 01:09:24,881
- What's that?
- Maybe somebody's fallen overboard!
1116
01:09:24,961 --> 01:09:26,961
Come on, help me pull them up!
1117
01:09:36,521 --> 01:09:38,841
(YELLING)
1118
01:09:40,321 --> 01:09:43,441
- Did you see what I saw?
- Certainly, you know who they are?
1119
01:09:43,521 --> 01:09:45,401
They're our twin brothers,
Stan and Ollie!
1120
01:09:45,481 --> 01:09:46,921
- What are they doing?
- I don't know!
1121
01:09:47,001 --> 01:09:48,921
Come on, let's get 'em up! Get ahold.
1122
01:09:50,281 --> 01:09:52,241
- (PULLEY CRANKING)
- (CHAIN RATTLING)
1123
01:10:04,481 --> 01:10:06,601
Well, well, well, hello, Ollie!
1124
01:10:06,681 --> 01:10:09,321
Hello, Bert. Gee,
it's great to see you.
1125
01:10:09,401 --> 01:10:12,121
- Hello, Stan.
- Hello, Alf.
1126
01:10:12,201 --> 01:10:13,601
What are you doing here?
1127
01:10:13,681 --> 01:10:15,681
Mother wrote us and told us
that you two were dead.
1128
01:10:15,761 --> 01:10:18,441
Well, we just arrived this morning
on the Periwinkle.
1129
01:10:18,521 --> 01:10:20,241
That explains everything,
1130
01:10:20,321 --> 01:10:23,281
they've been mistaken for us
and we've been mistaken for them.
1131
01:10:23,361 --> 01:10:26,601
Why, certainly! (LAUGHS)
1132
01:10:26,681 --> 01:10:28,761
Let's go home
and explain it to the wives.
1133
01:10:28,841 --> 01:10:31,841
You're sure looking good, Stanley,
but how you have altered.
1134
01:10:31,921 --> 01:10:35,641
You've altered too but you
haven't changed a bit, has he, Ollie?
1135
01:10:35,721 --> 01:10:37,121
Come on, Bert.
1136
01:10:39,321 --> 01:10:42,361
That Laurel is the dumbest
thing I ever saw.
1137
01:10:43,081 --> 01:10:46,441
- The other one is too.
- You're absolutely right, Bert.
1138
01:10:46,521 --> 01:10:49,761
Neither one of them can see any
further than the end of their nose.
1139
01:11:03,361 --> 01:11:04,361
Subtitles (English SDH): Deluxe
1140
01:11:05,441 --> 01:11:06,441
English - SDH
87142
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