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1
00:00:02,401 --> 00:00:03,868
[mumbling]
2
00:00:03,935 --> 00:00:07,239
HEY, DAD,
WHAT'S THE FIRST LINE
TO OCTOPUS'S GARDEN?
3
00:00:07,241 --> 00:00:11,809
ISN'T IT SOMETHING LIKE,
"HEY, LITTLE OCTOPUS,
DEEP IN THE OCEAN,
4
00:00:11,877 --> 00:00:13,811
"YOU HAVE A PRETTY GARDEN,
5
00:00:13,879 --> 00:00:16,014
CAN I BORROW SOME LOTION?"
6
00:00:16,082 --> 00:00:17,215
SOMETHING LIKE THAT?
7
00:00:17,217 --> 00:00:19,050
THAT'S CLOSE ENOUGH.
8
00:00:19,117 --> 00:00:21,753
I THINK
THAT'S HOW THEY SANG IT
IN BEATLEMANIA.
9
00:00:21,820 --> 00:00:22,853
WELL, IT DOESN'T MATTER.
10
00:00:22,921 --> 00:00:24,855
IT'S ALL PART
OF MY ON-GOING CURIOSITY
11
00:00:25,124 --> 00:00:27,759
AND FASCINATION
WITH MARINE LIFE
AND OCEANOGRAPHY.
12
00:00:27,826 --> 00:00:30,562
OH, WHAT BROUGHT UP
YOUR SUDDEN INTEREST
IN THAT SUBJECT, DEAR?
13
00:00:30,630 --> 00:00:32,731
HAVE YOU BEEN SPENDING TIME
IN THE LIBRARY?
14
00:00:32,798 --> 00:00:35,300
NO. OF COURSE NOT, MA.
15
00:00:35,367 --> 00:00:38,169
IT'S JUST THAT THEY'VE BEEN
RERUNNING SEA HUNTON CABLE RECENTLY.
16
00:00:38,237 --> 00:00:41,372
I ALWAYS THOUGHT SEA HUNTWAS A SHOW FOR MORONS.
17
00:00:42,975 --> 00:00:44,576
WELL, TODAY'S THE BIG DAY.
18
00:00:44,643 --> 00:00:48,446
I FINALLY HAVE ENOUGH MONEY
TO BUY A MR. UNDERWATER WATCH.
19
00:00:48,514 --> 00:00:51,249
WHY DO YOU WANT
ONE OF THOSE?
YOU CAN BARELY SWIM.
20
00:00:51,316 --> 00:00:53,451
AND YOU'RE AFRAID
OF THE WATER.
21
00:00:53,518 --> 00:00:55,453
DON'T YOU PEOPLE UNDERSTAND?
22
00:00:55,521 --> 00:00:58,289
THE OCEAN IS A STATE OF MIND.
23
00:00:58,357 --> 00:01:01,326
ONE DOESN'T HAVE TO BE IN IT
TO APPRECIATE IT.
24
00:01:01,393 --> 00:01:03,328
FROM THE TIME
WE FIRST CRAWLED OUT
25
00:01:03,395 --> 00:01:05,863
OF THE BLUE SALT WATER
AS MONKEYS,
26
00:01:05,931 --> 00:01:09,000
TO THE TIME WE HARNESSEDITS POWER ON SURFBOARDS,
27
00:01:09,067 --> 00:01:11,002
MAN HAS ALWAYS STRIVED
28
00:01:11,070 --> 00:01:13,438
TO BECOME ONE WITH THE OCEAN.
29
00:01:15,040 --> 00:01:16,875
BESIDES I JUST THINK
IT WOULD BE KIND OF NEAT
30
00:01:16,942 --> 00:01:19,277
TO HAVE A WATCH
I CAN WEAR INTO THE SHOWER.
31
00:01:19,344 --> 00:01:20,579
I BETTER GET GOING.
32
00:01:20,646 --> 00:01:22,180
THE TRANSISTOR HUT
OPENS AT 10:00.
33
00:01:22,247 --> 00:01:24,983
AND AFTER MY EXPERIENCE
WITH THE MENUDO TICKETS
LAST WEEK,
34
00:01:25,050 --> 00:01:27,852
I KNOW HOW THINGS
SELL OUT EARLY. BYE.
35
00:01:27,920 --> 00:01:29,754
[kissing]
36
00:01:29,822 --> 00:01:32,524
CAN WE TRY
AND START SLEEPING IN
IN THE MORNING
37
00:01:32,592 --> 00:01:34,926
SO WE MISS HIM ALTOGETHER?
38
00:01:34,994 --> 00:01:37,562
�[Stand by R.E.M. playing]
39
00:01:41,900 --> 00:01:43,335
[bicycle bell ringing]
40
00:01:43,402 --> 00:01:46,670
� STAND IN THE PLACEWHERE YOU LIVE �
41
00:01:46,738 --> 00:01:48,039
� NOW FACE NORTH
42
00:01:48,107 --> 00:01:49,574
� THINK ABOUT DIRECTION
43
00:01:49,642 --> 00:01:52,377
� WONDER WHY YOU HAVEN'T
44
00:01:52,444 --> 00:01:55,346
� NOW STAND IN THE PLACEWHERE YOU WORK �
45
00:01:55,414 --> 00:01:56,747
� NOW FACE WEST
46
00:01:56,816 --> 00:01:58,917
� THINK ABOUT THE PLACEWHERE YOU LIVE �
47
00:01:58,984 --> 00:02:01,085
� WONDER WHYYOU HAVEN'T BEFORE �
48
00:02:01,153 --> 00:02:04,055
� STAND IN THE PLACEWHERE YOU LIVE �
49
00:02:04,123 --> 00:02:05,423
� NOW FACE NORTH
50
00:02:05,490 --> 00:02:07,025
� THINK ABOUT DIRECTION
51
00:02:07,092 --> 00:02:09,594
� WONDER WHY YOU HAVEN'T
52
00:02:09,662 --> 00:02:12,797
� NOW STAND IN THE PLACEWHERE YOU WORK �
53
00:02:12,865 --> 00:02:14,399
� NOW FACE WEST
54
00:02:14,466 --> 00:02:16,434
� THINK ABOUT THE PLACEWHERE YOU LIVE �
55
00:02:16,501 --> 00:02:18,570
� WONDER WHYYOU HAVEN'T BEFORE �
56
00:02:18,637 --> 00:02:22,307
� STAND IN THE PLACEWHERE YOU ARE �
57
00:02:22,374 --> 00:02:25,810
� SO STAND
58
00:02:28,747 --> 00:02:31,015
PLEASE, SIR, WHY CAN'T I
EXCHANGE THIS WATCH
59
00:02:31,082 --> 00:02:32,117
FOR ONE THAT WORKS?
60
00:02:32,184 --> 00:02:33,918
LOOK, KID, I CAN'T
EXCHANGE ANY ITEM
61
00:02:33,986 --> 00:02:35,786
THAT WAS OBVIOUSLY ABUSED
BY THE CUSTOMER.
62
00:02:35,854 --> 00:02:37,589
BUT I JUST GAVE IT
TO MY MOM THIS MORNING
63
00:02:37,656 --> 00:02:38,956
FOR HER BIRTHDAY.
64
00:02:39,024 --> 00:02:41,226
AND IT BROKE
WHEN SHE TRIED TO WIND IT.
65
00:02:41,293 --> 00:02:42,893
HERE'S MY RECEIPT.
66
00:02:42,961 --> 00:02:46,364
LOOK, HONEY, I DON'T CARE
IF YOU WAVE THE MAGNA CARTA
IN MY FACE.
67
00:02:46,431 --> 00:02:48,366
I HAVE A POLICY
AGAINST LOITERING.
68
00:02:48,433 --> 00:02:49,801
[sobbing]
69
00:02:50,669 --> 00:02:52,170
[sniffling]
70
00:02:52,238 --> 00:02:54,906
TELL YOUR OLD LADY
I SAID HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
71
00:02:55,908 --> 00:02:57,508
UM,
72
00:02:57,576 --> 00:02:59,210
EXCUSE ME, SIR,
COULD YOU TELL ME
73
00:02:59,278 --> 00:03:01,880
WHY THAT LITTLE GIRL
JUST LEFT YOUR STORE IN TEARS?
74
00:03:01,947 --> 00:03:03,214
OH, SHE JUST REMEMBERED
75
00:03:03,282 --> 00:03:05,416
THAT HER, UH, DOG
HAD TO HAVE AN OPERATION.
76
00:03:05,484 --> 00:03:06,918
[sniffling]
77
00:03:06,986 --> 00:03:09,787
[quavering] IS HE GONNA BE OK?
78
00:03:09,922 --> 00:03:13,190
IT'S PROBABLY
JUST A MINOR TONSILLECTOMY.
79
00:03:13,258 --> 00:03:14,125
[sighs]
80
00:03:14,193 --> 00:03:15,726
THAT'S A RELIEF.
81
00:03:15,794 --> 00:03:17,395
WHAT CAN WE DO
FOR YOU TODAY?
82
00:03:17,463 --> 00:03:19,897
WELL, UH, ACCORDING
TO YOUR AD HERE,
83
00:03:19,966 --> 00:03:22,767
YOU HAVE
A MR. UNDERWATER WATCH
FOR SALE
84
00:03:22,834 --> 00:03:24,874
AND I WOULD VERY MUCH
LIKE TO PURCHASE THAT WATCH.
85
00:03:24,936 --> 00:03:26,371
NOW, BEFORE YOU GIVE ME
86
00:03:26,438 --> 00:03:28,206
ONE OF YOUR LITTLE TAP-DANCE
BAIT AND SWITCH SPEECHES,
87
00:03:28,274 --> 00:03:31,242
LET ME JUST TELL YOU RIGHT NOW
I WANT THIS WATCH
AND THIS WATCH ONLY.
88
00:03:31,310 --> 00:03:33,144
MY MIND IS MADE UP.
89
00:03:33,212 --> 00:03:35,380
THIS IS THE WATCH I WANT.
I WON'T TAKE ANY SUBSTITUTES.
THAT'S IT.
90
00:03:35,447 --> 00:03:37,648
TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT.
LOVE ME OR LEAVE ME.
THAT'S IT.
91
00:03:37,716 --> 00:03:39,717
POOR PIP.
BYE-BYE, MISS AMERICAN PIE.
92
00:03:39,785 --> 00:03:42,286
FINE. I'LL SELL YOU THE WATCH.
IT'S A PIECE OF JUNK.
93
00:03:42,354 --> 00:03:44,923
REALLY? WELL,
WHAT ELSE DO YOU HAVE?
94
00:03:44,990 --> 00:03:47,125
I GOT JUST THE WATCH
FOR YOU.
95
00:03:47,192 --> 00:03:49,494
BY THE WAY THE NAME'S VIC.
I OWN THIS PLACE.
96
00:03:49,561 --> 00:03:51,529
OH, HELLO, VIC,
I'M CHRIS PETERSON,
97
00:03:51,596 --> 00:03:54,232
AND I'D JUST LIKE TO SAY
IT'S A RELIEF
THAT YOU'RE WAITING ON ME
98
00:03:54,300 --> 00:03:56,667
INSTEAD OF
SOME SLICK SALESCLERK
WHO MIGHT RIP ME OFF.
99
00:03:56,736 --> 00:03:59,270
[snickering]
100
00:03:59,272 --> 00:04:00,705
I'M SORRY,
IS THERE A PROBLEM, SIR?
101
00:04:00,773 --> 00:04:02,874
NO, IT'S JUST
A LITTLE CONGESTION.
102
00:04:02,942 --> 00:04:04,182
(Vic)
CHRIS?
YEAH.
103
00:04:04,243 --> 00:04:05,743
CAN I CALL YOU CHRIS?
PLEASE.
104
00:04:05,811 --> 00:04:07,945
I'M ABOUT TO SHOW YOU
SOMETHING VERY SPECIAL.
105
00:04:08,013 --> 00:04:09,314
YOU KNOW WHY?
106
00:04:09,382 --> 00:04:10,815
'CAUSE I CAN TELL
BY YOUR FACE
107
00:04:10,883 --> 00:04:13,184
THAT YOU'RE THE KIND OF GUY
THAT APPRECIATES QUALITY.
108
00:04:13,251 --> 00:04:14,953
NOW WHAT I'M ABOUT
TO SHOW YOU, CHRIS,
109
00:04:15,020 --> 00:04:16,387
MIGHT OVERWHELM YOU
AT FIRST,
110
00:04:16,455 --> 00:04:18,056
BUT I WANT YOU
TO KEEP IN MIND
111
00:04:18,124 --> 00:04:21,125
YOU'RE SEEING
THE FINEST TIMEPIECE
MADE IN THE WORLD.
112
00:04:21,193 --> 00:04:22,560
A CHRONOSYNC.
113
00:04:24,529 --> 00:04:26,698
WOW. A CHRONO...
114
00:04:27,666 --> 00:04:30,335
A CHRONOSYNC. YEAH.
115
00:04:30,402 --> 00:04:33,404
IT'S NOT JUST A CHRONOSYNC.
THAT'S A CHRONOSYNC 2000.
116
00:04:33,472 --> 00:04:36,173
THAT IS THE CADILLAC
OF UNDERWATER WATCHES.
117
00:04:36,175 --> 00:04:37,175
HMM.
118
00:04:37,242 --> 00:04:38,442
GO AHEAD, TRY IT ON.
119
00:04:38,510 --> 00:04:40,244
BOY. OH!
120
00:04:41,180 --> 00:04:43,014
OH. OH.
121
00:04:44,049 --> 00:04:46,384
IT'S SO GAY
AND COLORFUL-LOOKING.
122
00:04:47,119 --> 00:04:48,619
BUT IS IT RUGGED?
123
00:04:48,687 --> 00:04:51,055
YEAH, SURE IT'S, UH,
GAY AND RUGGED.
124
00:04:51,123 --> 00:04:52,556
IN FACT,
THAT IS THE SLOGAN
125
00:04:52,624 --> 00:04:54,592
THAT THEY'RE GOING USE
IN THEIR ADVERTISING.
126
00:04:54,659 --> 00:04:56,728
[snickering]
127
00:04:56,796 --> 00:04:59,697
I-I'M SORRY. CAN I GET YOU
A LOZENGE OR SOMETHING?
128
00:04:59,765 --> 00:05:01,166
NO, I'M FINE.
129
00:05:05,204 --> 00:05:07,371
NOW IT'S STOPPED TICKING.
NOW, IS THAT A BAD SIGN?
130
00:05:07,439 --> 00:05:09,873
NO. IT'S KNOWN
AS A TAP WATCH.
131
00:05:09,941 --> 00:05:12,610
YOU JUST...
YOU TAP IT NOW AND THEN
TO GET IT STARTED,
132
00:05:12,678 --> 00:05:16,581
AND THAT KEEPS IT
FROM BURNING ITSELF OUT
BY RUNNING CONSTANTLY.
133
00:05:17,549 --> 00:05:18,916
WHAT A NOVEL IDEA.
134
00:05:18,984 --> 00:05:20,151
[laughs]
135
00:05:20,219 --> 00:05:23,854
BOY. WELL,
NOW MY MAJOR CONSIDERATION.
136
00:05:23,922 --> 00:05:25,923
EL PRICEROONIE.
137
00:05:25,991 --> 00:05:28,726
I DON'T KNOW THAT I CAN
AFFORD A CHRONOSYNC.
138
00:05:28,794 --> 00:05:30,862
I'M NOT GONNA
LIE TO YOU, CHRIS.
139
00:05:30,929 --> 00:05:34,799
LIKE I TOLD YOU BEFORE,
THIS WATCH AIN'T A TOY.
IT'S A CADILLAC.
140
00:05:34,866 --> 00:05:36,867
WHAT DID I JUST SAY, CHRIS?
141
00:05:36,935 --> 00:05:39,069
"THIS WATCH AIN'T A TOY.
IT'S A CADILLAC."
142
00:05:39,137 --> 00:05:40,538
(Vic) THAT'S RIGHT.
143
00:05:40,540 --> 00:05:43,908
YOU KNOW WHO WEARS
A WATCH LIKE THAT?
NEIL ARMSTRONG.
144
00:05:43,975 --> 00:05:45,777
YOU KNOW WHO ALSO
WEARS A WATCH LIKE THAT
145
00:05:45,844 --> 00:05:48,145
IS THE GUY ON THE NEWS
THAT GOT BEAT UP
THAT TIME.
146
00:05:48,214 --> 00:05:49,279
WHAT'S HIS NAME?
147
00:05:49,347 --> 00:05:51,115
RATHER.
RATHER. DAN RATHER.
148
00:05:51,182 --> 00:05:53,684
HE WEARS WATCH
LIKE THAT.
PRETTY GOOD COMPANY.
149
00:05:53,752 --> 00:05:54,912
YEAH.
150
00:05:54,953 --> 00:05:56,987
CHRIS, THE BOTTOM LINE IS
IT'S $100.
151
00:05:57,056 --> 00:05:59,757
NOW THAT'S $50
MORE THAN THE PIECE OF JUNK
YOU WANTED ORIGINALLY.
152
00:05:59,825 --> 00:06:01,559
BUT WE'VE GOT A SAYING
AROUND HERE:
153
00:06:01,627 --> 00:06:04,627
IF YOU WANT
A PIECE OF JUNK,
YOU GO TO A JUNKYARD.
154
00:06:05,998 --> 00:06:09,367
YOU KNOW, THAT'S REALLY
QUITE BEAUTIFUL.
155
00:06:09,434 --> 00:06:12,234
HMM, I'M REALLY NOT SURE
I WANNA RUSH
INTO SOMETHING THOUGH.
156
00:06:12,237 --> 00:06:14,539
DID I ALSO MENTION THAT
THAT IS THE LAST ONE?
157
00:06:14,607 --> 00:06:17,174
I'VE GOT ANOTHER CUSTOMER
COMING IN IN A LITTLE WHILE
TO SEE...
158
00:06:17,242 --> 00:06:18,575
OK, IT'S SOLD. GREAT.
159
00:06:18,643 --> 00:06:20,344
(Vic) YOUR TOTAL IS $118.
160
00:06:20,412 --> 00:06:21,445
OK.
161
00:06:24,783 --> 00:06:27,118
AND THERE'S $118
ON THE NOSE.
162
00:06:27,653 --> 00:06:29,420
HOW GREAT.
163
00:06:29,488 --> 00:06:32,623
WELL, THAT'S INTERESTING.
I DIDN'T REALIZE
SALES TAX WAS 18%.
164
00:06:32,758 --> 00:06:34,992
WELL, WHY DO YOU THINK
THE GOVERNOR
LIVES IN A MANSION?
165
00:06:35,060 --> 00:06:37,128
[snickering]
166
00:06:37,195 --> 00:06:39,230
YOU KNOW, I DON'T THINK
THAT WAS HIM THIS TIME.
167
00:06:39,297 --> 00:06:41,900
I THINK THAT WAS
THE AIR CONDITIONING.
168
00:06:41,967 --> 00:06:43,300
THANK YOU.
169
00:06:44,737 --> 00:06:46,403
[knocking on door]
170
00:06:49,808 --> 00:06:53,077
MA, DAD, YOU'RE EARLY.
YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED
TO GET HERE TILL 3:00.
171
00:06:53,145 --> 00:06:54,946
IT'S AFTER 3:00.
172
00:06:56,815 --> 00:06:59,350
OH, YEAH.
MY WATCH WAS RESTING AGAIN.
173
00:07:00,318 --> 00:07:01,653
ISN'T THAT NEAT, DAD?
174
00:07:01,720 --> 00:07:03,800
A WATCH THAT PERIODICALLY
SHUTS ITSELF DOWN
175
00:07:03,856 --> 00:07:05,322
SO IT WON'T OVERHEAT.
176
00:07:05,390 --> 00:07:07,558
AW, LOOK OUT. THAT MAY BE
GIVING OFF RADIATION.
177
00:07:07,626 --> 00:07:10,728
HONEY, ARE YOU SURE
THEY DIDN'T SELL YOU
A BAD WATCH?
178
00:07:10,796 --> 00:07:13,130
MA, PLEASE,
THIS IS A CHRONOSYNC.
179
00:07:13,198 --> 00:07:14,966
IT'S THE CADILLAC OF WATCHES.
180
00:07:15,034 --> 00:07:17,935
ARE YOU SURE IT'S NOT
THE DODGE DART OF WATCHES?
181
00:07:18,003 --> 00:07:19,103
VERY FUNNY.
182
00:07:19,171 --> 00:07:21,339
NOW IF WE'RE ALL DONE
WITH OUR LITTLE WITTY JABS,
183
00:07:21,406 --> 00:07:23,640
LET US NOW GET ON
WITH THE BUSINESS AT HAND.
184
00:07:23,708 --> 00:07:26,945
CHRISTENING
MY NEW MR. UNDERWATER WATCH.
185
00:07:27,012 --> 00:07:29,781
LET IT NOW BE WRITTEN
THAT ON THIS DAY
186
00:07:29,848 --> 00:07:31,816
AT 3:05 P.M....
187
00:07:31,884 --> 00:07:33,184
IT'S 3:15.
188
00:07:34,987 --> 00:07:36,921
AT 3:15 P.M.,
189
00:07:36,989 --> 00:07:40,291
CHRIS PETERSON
ENTERED HIS SHOWER
FOR THE FIRST TIME
190
00:07:40,359 --> 00:07:43,761
WEARING
A WATER-RESISTANT TIMEPIECE
STRAPPED TO HIS WRIST.
191
00:07:43,828 --> 00:07:47,065
FOR TIME HAS ALWAYS BEEN
OF GREAT IMPORTANCE TO MAN.
192
00:07:47,132 --> 00:07:50,201
GOING BACK TOTHE FABLED SUNDIAL, WHEN MANFIRST THOUGHT, PERHAPS...
193
00:07:50,268 --> 00:07:51,536
GET ON WITH IT, CHRIS.
194
00:07:51,670 --> 00:07:54,405
I'M MISSING
WHEEL OF FORTUNE FOR THIS.
195
00:07:54,473 --> 00:07:57,608
OK, OK. MOM, DAD,
HERE I GO.
196
00:07:58,243 --> 00:07:59,643
�[scatting]
197
00:08:04,683 --> 00:08:07,585
THIS IS MORE EXCITING
THAN WHEN WE DROVE OUT
TO SNAKE RIVER CANYON
198
00:08:07,653 --> 00:08:09,053
FOR THAT EVEL KNIEVEL THING.
199
00:08:09,121 --> 00:08:10,120
HMM.
200
00:08:10,188 --> 00:08:11,789
[Chris yelling]
201
00:08:12,024 --> 00:08:15,192
OH, LOOK, LOOK.
IT'S RUINED.
202
00:08:15,260 --> 00:08:16,994
IT'S RUINED.
203
00:08:17,062 --> 00:08:19,430
(Gladys)
IT'S STARTING TO DISSOLVE
LIKE A SLIVER OF SOAP.
204
00:08:19,498 --> 00:08:20,899
BUT THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE.
205
00:08:20,966 --> 00:08:23,901
THIS IS A CHRONOSYNC.
GAY YET RUGGED.
206
00:08:23,969 --> 00:08:27,004
WATER-RESISTANT
UP TO A 1000 FEET
AND IT COST...
207
00:08:27,072 --> 00:08:28,405
IT COST...
208
00:08:31,109 --> 00:08:33,544
OH, GOD. OH, GOD.
209
00:08:36,414 --> 00:08:39,717
MOM, DAD,
I DON'T WANT TO SHOCK YOU
WITH HORRIFYING NEWS.
210
00:08:39,785 --> 00:08:42,419
BUT YOUR LITTLE CHRISSY
HAS JUST BEEN RIPPED OFF.
211
00:08:42,487 --> 00:08:45,290
HEY, I THINK
THAT JUST CAME IN
OVER THE NEWS SERVICE.
212
00:08:45,357 --> 00:08:46,791
[huffing]
213
00:08:46,859 --> 00:08:48,926
WELL, NO ONE TAKES ADVANTAGE
OF YOURS TRULY
214
00:08:48,994 --> 00:08:50,260
AND GETS AWAY WITH IT.
215
00:08:50,328 --> 00:08:51,896
I'M GOING BACK
TO THAT DEN OF THIEVES
216
00:08:51,963 --> 00:08:54,465
AND I'M GETTIN' EVERY CENT
OF MY MONEY BACK.
217
00:08:54,533 --> 00:08:55,800
PROBABLY.
218
00:08:57,002 --> 00:08:59,070
CAN I HAVE
A LITTLE PRIVACY, PLEASE?
219
00:08:59,137 --> 00:09:00,137
JEEZ.
220
00:09:00,205 --> 00:09:02,540
EXCUSE ME. MMM-HMM.
221
00:09:09,347 --> 00:09:13,017
OK, YOU THIEVING PIRATES.
DROP YOUR CLOCKS
AND GRAB YOU SOCKS
222
00:09:13,085 --> 00:09:15,152
'CAUSE I'M BACK
TO SETTLE A SCORE.
223
00:09:15,220 --> 00:09:16,754
YOU WANNA
SHUT THE DOOR, GUY?
224
00:09:16,822 --> 00:09:18,722
YOU'RE LETTIN' OUT
ALL THE HEAT.
225
00:09:18,790 --> 00:09:20,190
OH, SORRY.
226
00:09:21,560 --> 00:09:23,027
[bell tinkling]
227
00:09:23,094 --> 00:09:25,996
I WANNA TALK TO VIC,
AND I WANNA TALK TO VIC NOW.
228
00:09:26,064 --> 00:09:27,599
HE AIN'T HERE.
229
00:09:27,666 --> 00:09:29,634
OK, FINE.
SINCE YOUR HUCKSTER BOSS
ISN'T AROUND,
230
00:09:29,702 --> 00:09:33,604
PERHAPS YOU'D LIKE TO EXPLAIN
THIS TO ME. HMM?
231
00:09:33,739 --> 00:09:37,341
EXPLAIN TO ME WHY THIS,
"THE CADILLAC
OF UNDERWATER WATCHES,"
232
00:09:37,408 --> 00:09:42,046
WAS RUINED BY
A SIMPLE 3-SECOND ESCAPADE
IN MY SHOWER.
233
00:09:42,114 --> 00:09:46,384
LOOK, HERE'S MY RECEIPT.
I WANT MY MONEY BACK NOW.
234
00:09:46,451 --> 00:09:47,819
HOP TO IT.
235
00:09:47,886 --> 00:09:49,721
KID, THE POPE WILL OPEN
HIS OWN CARWASH
236
00:09:49,788 --> 00:09:53,123
BEFORE I GIVE YOU
YOUR MONEY BACK.
237
00:09:53,191 --> 00:09:56,894
TELL YOU WHAT I'M GONNA DO
JUST SO
THERE'S NO HARD FEELINGS.
238
00:09:56,896 --> 00:10:00,431
I'M GONNA GIVE YOU
THIS LIGHT UP DUCK CAP
FOR FREE.
239
00:10:05,037 --> 00:10:06,103
[sighs]
240
00:10:06,171 --> 00:10:09,440
AS HUMPHREY BOGART SAID
IN THE AFRICAN QUEEN:
241
00:10:09,508 --> 00:10:14,579
"YOU CAN'T BUY MY SILENCE
WITH A STINKING
LIGHT UP DUCK HAT."
242
00:10:14,646 --> 00:10:17,014
I WANT MY MONEY BACK
AND I WANT IT BACK NOW.
243
00:10:17,081 --> 00:10:18,115
FORGET IT.
244
00:10:18,183 --> 00:10:19,683
OK, FINE.
245
00:10:19,751 --> 00:10:22,320
I WASN'T GONNA DO THIS,
BUT YOU'VE LEFT ME NO CHOICE.
246
00:10:22,388 --> 00:10:24,468
AT THIS POINT
I SHALL DROP MY PANTS
247
00:10:24,523 --> 00:10:28,059
IN PROTEST OF
THE SHODDY BUSINESS PRACTICES
OF THIS STORE.
248
00:10:28,127 --> 00:10:29,994
AND I SHALL NOT
REPANT MYSELF
249
00:10:30,062 --> 00:10:32,763
UNTIL ALL MY MONEY
HAS BEEN CHEERFULLY
REFUNDED.
250
00:10:32,831 --> 00:10:36,100
HEY, HEY, HEY,
PUT YOUR PANTS BACK ON.
THIS AIN'T NEW ORLEANS.
251
00:10:36,167 --> 00:10:37,601
I'M SORRY, PAL.
GET USED TO IT.
252
00:10:37,669 --> 00:10:39,403
THIS IS CALLED
"MAKIN' A SCENE."
253
00:10:39,471 --> 00:10:40,705
I WANT MY MONEY BACK.
254
00:10:40,772 --> 00:10:43,608
I HATE THIS STORE.
I HATE THIS STORE.
255
00:10:43,675 --> 00:10:45,109
I WANT MY MONEY BACK.
256
00:10:45,176 --> 00:10:46,416
KNOCK IT OFF,
YOU CREEP!
257
00:10:46,477 --> 00:10:48,245
I HATE THIS STORE.
I HATE THIS...
258
00:10:48,313 --> 00:10:50,014
WHAT THE HELL'S
GOIN' ON HERE?
259
00:10:50,081 --> 00:10:52,016
OFFICER,
ARREST THIS LUNATIC.
260
00:10:52,083 --> 00:10:56,153
HE'S A DISGRACE
TO THE PROFESSION
OF RETAIL ELECTRONICS.
261
00:10:56,221 --> 00:10:57,555
ALL RIGHT, PAL,
LET'S GO.
262
00:10:57,623 --> 00:10:59,184
HEY, WAIT A SECOND,
YOU CAN'T ARREST ME.
263
00:10:59,224 --> 00:11:01,859
I'M STAGING A PROTEST HERE
LIKE GANDHI USED TO DO.
264
00:11:01,927 --> 00:11:03,928
GANDHI KEPT HIS PANTS ON.
265
00:11:04,997 --> 00:11:06,363
ACTUALLY HE WORE A DHOTI,
266
00:11:06,431 --> 00:11:09,800
WHICH IS THE TRADITIONALINDIAN GARB,AND HE OFTEN WORE...
267
00:11:09,868 --> 00:11:11,568
(Owen)
MR. PETERSON,
ONCE AGAIN,
268
00:11:11,636 --> 00:11:14,405
WHY WERE YOU DANCING AROUND
IN AN ELECTRONICS STORE
269
00:11:14,473 --> 00:11:16,140
IN YOUR UNDERWEAR?
270
00:11:16,208 --> 00:11:17,775
LISTEN, OFFICER SMART-ASS.
271
00:11:17,842 --> 00:11:20,211
I DON'T DROP MY PANTS
AT THE DROP OF A HAT.
272
00:11:20,279 --> 00:11:21,612
I HAVE TO BE PUSHED
PRETTY FAR
273
00:11:21,680 --> 00:11:23,781
BEFORE I MAKE
A PROFOUND STATEMENT
LIKE THAT.
274
00:11:23,848 --> 00:11:26,609
LOOK, SWEETHEART,
YOU WANT TO TAKE
A COUPLE OF DEEP BREATHS
275
00:11:26,652 --> 00:11:28,172
AND THEN SLOWLY
EXPLAIN TO US
276
00:11:28,219 --> 00:11:30,087
JUST WHAT THE HELL
YOU'RE TALKIN' ABOUT?
277
00:11:30,154 --> 00:11:31,856
YOU WANT A DRINK
OR SOMETHING?
278
00:11:31,923 --> 00:11:34,124
OH, YES,
THAT WOULD BE LOVELY.
YOU'RE A DEAR.
279
00:11:34,192 --> 00:11:37,095
I WOULD LIKE, UH,
A LITTLE ICED CAPPUCCINO,
280
00:11:37,162 --> 00:11:38,963
AND, UH, MAYBE
A PEACH DANISH,
281
00:11:39,030 --> 00:11:40,898
AND, UH,
PERHAPS A LITTLE PEPITOS SAUCE
282
00:11:40,965 --> 00:11:43,935
JUST ON THE SIDE
WOULD BE LOVELY.
283
00:11:44,002 --> 00:11:46,337
GET THE JERK A CUP OF WATER.
284
00:11:46,404 --> 00:11:48,572
OK, HERE IS THE STORY
IN A CLAM SHELL.
285
00:11:48,640 --> 00:11:50,441
BOY SAVES UP
FOR UNDERWATER WATCH.
286
00:11:50,509 --> 00:11:52,209
BOY BUYS UNDERWATER WATCH.
287
00:11:52,277 --> 00:11:54,445
BOY TAKES UNDERWATER WATCH
INTO THE SHOWER.
288
00:11:54,513 --> 00:11:56,981
BOY SCREAMS LIKE A GIRL
WHEN THE WATCH IS RUINED.
289
00:11:57,049 --> 00:11:59,450
BOY'S STARTING
TO GET ON DETECTIVE'S NERVES.
290
00:11:59,517 --> 00:12:00,651
PLEASE.
291
00:12:01,920 --> 00:12:03,120
[clears throat]
292
00:12:03,188 --> 00:12:05,308
STORE REFUSES
TO REFUND BOY'S MONEY.
293
00:12:05,323 --> 00:12:06,824
BOY TAKES OFF HIS PANTS.
294
00:12:06,892 --> 00:12:08,759
BOY IS ARRESTED
BY GOON SQUAD.
295
00:12:08,827 --> 00:12:11,428
THE END. SLEEP TIGHT.
PLEASANT DREAMS.
296
00:12:15,133 --> 00:12:16,567
[sighs]
297
00:12:16,635 --> 00:12:21,438
MR. PETERSON, CAN WE BE, UH,
PERFECTLY BLUNT WITH YOU?
298
00:12:21,506 --> 00:12:24,141
OH, PLEASE. BLUNT AWAY.
299
00:12:24,209 --> 00:12:26,743
THE ESTABLISHMENT
YOU DROPPED YOUR PANTS IN,
MR. PETERSON,
300
00:12:26,811 --> 00:12:28,845
HAS BEEN UNDER SURVEILLANCE
FOR SOME TIME NOW.
301
00:12:28,913 --> 00:12:31,182
WE KNOW THEY'VE BEEN SELLING
COUNTERFEIT MERCHANDISE.
302
00:12:31,249 --> 00:12:34,418
EVERYTHING
FROM CHRONOSYNC WATCHES
TO MAINE LOBSTERS.
303
00:12:34,486 --> 00:12:36,921
COUNTERFEIT SEAFOOD? HUH.
304
00:12:36,989 --> 00:12:39,556
WHY THOSE
UNSCRUPULOUS BASTARDS.
305
00:12:39,624 --> 00:12:42,092
THE STORE ITSELF
IS SMALL POTATOES.
306
00:12:42,160 --> 00:12:44,362
WHAT WE'RE REALLY AFTER
IS THEIR SUPPLIER.
307
00:12:44,429 --> 00:12:45,396
THE BIG POTATO?
308
00:12:45,463 --> 00:12:46,998
RIGHT.
309
00:12:47,065 --> 00:12:49,133
UNFORTUNATELY,
HE RARELY SHOWS HIS FACE
310
00:12:49,201 --> 00:12:51,168
UNLESS HE'S MAKING
A BIG DELIVERY.
311
00:12:51,236 --> 00:12:54,405
NOW, IF WE HAD THE PROPER BAIT
I THINK WE COULD CATCH HIM.
312
00:12:54,472 --> 00:12:56,908
BUT SO FAR
HE'S MANAGED TO ELUDE US.
313
00:12:56,975 --> 00:12:58,609
THAT'S A BUMMER.
314
00:12:58,677 --> 00:12:59,743
HUH.
315
00:12:59,811 --> 00:13:01,345
[tongue clicking]
316
00:13:01,413 --> 00:13:03,547
[imitating squawking]
317
00:13:07,018 --> 00:13:08,753
HEY, WAIT A MINUTE.
318
00:13:08,820 --> 00:13:11,188
ARE YOU THINKING
WHAT I'M THINKING?
HE'S PERFECT.
319
00:13:11,256 --> 00:13:14,425
NO ONE WOULD SUSPECT
SOMEONE AS GOOFY-LOOKING
AS HIM.
320
00:13:14,493 --> 00:13:17,061
NO, WE CAN'T.
IT'S TOO DANGEROUS.
321
00:13:17,129 --> 00:13:18,595
THE KID
COULD GET KILLED.
322
00:13:18,663 --> 00:13:20,697
OH, SURE. I MEAN,
THERE'S AN OUTSIDE CHANCE,
323
00:13:20,765 --> 00:13:22,867
BUT I DON'T THINK
THE WORLD
WOULD STOP SPINNING.
324
00:13:22,935 --> 00:13:24,201
BUT THE OUTSIDE CHANCE
IS TOO...
325
00:13:24,269 --> 00:13:27,504
HELLO, EXCUSE ME.
I'M STILL HERE YOU KNOW. JEEZ.
326
00:13:28,173 --> 00:13:31,075
MR. PETERSON,
327
00:13:31,077 --> 00:13:34,512
HOW'D YOU LIKE TO BE PART OF
AN UNDERCOVER STING OPERATION?
328
00:13:34,579 --> 00:13:37,381
ARE YOU KIDDING?
YEAH, SURE. GREAT.
329
00:13:37,449 --> 00:13:40,217
I'LL DO ANYTHING
TO CATCH THOSE SCOUNDRELS
THAT TOOK ME FOR A RIDE.
330
00:13:40,285 --> 00:13:42,486
I'M IN, BOYS.
CONSIDER ME YOUR BAIT.
331
00:13:42,554 --> 00:13:44,821
I'M LIKE A PIECE OF CHEESE
WAITING IN THE TRAP
332
00:13:44,889 --> 00:13:48,792
FOR MONSIEUR MOUSE
TO COME AND PARTAKE
OF MY RICH SMOKEY FLAVOR.
333
00:13:51,963 --> 00:13:54,464
WE'RE LOOKING
AT A DEAD MAN.
334
00:13:54,532 --> 00:13:57,001
HELLO, TRANSISTOR HUT? VIC?
335
00:13:57,069 --> 00:13:58,468
HI, CHRIS PETERSON.
336
00:13:58,536 --> 00:14:00,337
WHERE WERE YOU
THIS AFTERNOON?
337
00:14:00,338 --> 00:14:02,206
[chuckling]
338
00:14:02,274 --> 00:14:04,475
OH, SO YOU HEARD ABOUT
MY LITTLE INDISCRETION
TODAY, HUH?
339
00:14:04,542 --> 00:14:07,244
SORRY ABOUT THAT, VIC.
2 WORDS, SUGAR RUSH.
340
00:14:07,312 --> 00:14:08,713
[laughs]
341
00:14:08,780 --> 00:14:11,982
YEAH, I JUST HAD 2 CANDIES AND
A... A CHOCOLATE-COVERED PEANUT.
342
00:14:12,050 --> 00:14:13,484
[laughs]
343
00:14:13,551 --> 00:14:16,253
YEAH, VIC, I'M REALLY SORRY,
I LOVE THE WATCH.
344
00:14:16,321 --> 00:14:18,422
IN FACT,
IT'S WORKING PERFECTLY NOW.
345
00:14:18,489 --> 00:14:19,556
AND YOU KNOW WHAT?
346
00:14:19,624 --> 00:14:22,192
I'VE DECIDED TO BUY 3000 MORE
347
00:14:22,260 --> 00:14:24,795
FOR ALL MY NEWSPAPER BOYS.
348
00:14:24,863 --> 00:14:27,865
BUT YOU KNOW WHAT,
I'M GONNA HAVE TO INSIST
ON DELIVERY TO MY HOME
349
00:14:27,933 --> 00:14:30,501
[coughing]
BECAUSE RIGHT NOW
I'M NURSING THE GRIPPE
350
00:14:30,569 --> 00:14:31,635
[coughing]
351
00:14:31,703 --> 00:14:33,103
AND I CAN'T GO OUTSIDE.
352
00:14:33,171 --> 00:14:35,105
[chuckles]
353
00:14:35,173 --> 00:14:38,842
OH, YOU'D HAVE TO GO
THROUGH YOUR SUPPLIER
FOR AN ORDER THAT LARGE. HMM.
354
00:14:38,910 --> 00:14:42,012
[inaudible]
355
00:14:42,080 --> 00:14:45,115
WELL, BRING HIM ALONG.
YEAH, GREAT.
THE MORE THE MERRIER.
356
00:14:45,183 --> 00:14:46,216
[chuckles]
357
00:14:46,284 --> 00:14:48,244
OK, I LOVE YOU.
BYE-BYE.
358
00:14:48,920 --> 00:14:50,120
[sighs]
359
00:14:51,022 --> 00:14:52,823
[imitating squawking]
360
00:14:54,058 --> 00:14:56,727
OK, WE'RE ALL SET.
361
00:14:56,795 --> 00:15:00,063
NOW, MR. PETERSON,
LISTEN VERY CAREFULLY.
362
00:15:00,131 --> 00:15:02,666
THE WIRING WE'VE DONE UP HERE
IN YOUR LITTLE TREE HOUSE
363
00:15:02,734 --> 00:15:04,935
IS VERY PRECISE
AND VERY DELICATE.
364
00:15:05,003 --> 00:15:07,537
THAT'S THE CAMERA
RIGHT OVER THERE.
365
00:15:07,605 --> 00:15:11,441
NOW, WHATEVER YOU DO,
DON'T TOUCH OR MOVE ANYTHING.
YOU GOT THAT?
366
00:15:11,509 --> 00:15:12,843
[quivering]
367
00:15:12,911 --> 00:15:14,978
BUT WHAT IF I HAVE TO GO
TO THE BATHROOM?
368
00:15:15,046 --> 00:15:17,748
I WASN'T TALKING
ABOUT THE BATHROOM.
369
00:15:17,816 --> 00:15:22,419
OH, THAT'S A RELIEF,
'CAUSE I'VE A BLADDER
LIKE A HAMSTER.
370
00:15:22,487 --> 00:15:24,421
OK, GUYS,
LET'S MOVE OUT.
371
00:15:24,489 --> 00:15:25,689
GOOD LUCK, MR. PETERSON.
372
00:15:25,757 --> 00:15:27,023
THANK YOU.
373
00:15:27,091 --> 00:15:29,260
REMEMBER THIS IS
A VERY DANGEROUS OPERATION.
374
00:15:29,327 --> 00:15:31,963
THE LAST THING WE NEED
IS ANOTHER DEAD CIVILIAN
ON OUR HANDS.
375
00:15:32,030 --> 00:15:33,397
YEAH, YEAH.
SO, DO I HAVE TIME
376
00:15:33,465 --> 00:15:35,499
TO RUN TO THE 7-ELEVEN
FOR A PEPPERMINT PATTY?
377
00:15:35,600 --> 00:15:38,502
NO. JUST STAY PUT
AND GET READY.
378
00:15:38,570 --> 00:15:40,404
BOY.
379
00:15:40,472 --> 00:15:43,974
JEEZ, HE'S LIKE
A LITTLE SNAPPING TURTLE.
380
00:15:44,042 --> 00:15:45,942
OH, GREAT, THE PROFESSIONALS.
381
00:15:46,010 --> 00:15:47,278
[laughs]
382
00:15:47,345 --> 00:15:49,813
THERE'S A LITTLE THING
CALLED ELECTRICAL FIRES, BOYS.
383
00:15:49,881 --> 00:15:51,915
I GUESS
THEY DIDN'T TEACH YOU
ABOUT THAT ONE.
384
00:15:51,983 --> 00:15:53,884
STUPID, FLATFOOTED, FUZZ,
385
00:15:53,951 --> 00:15:55,819
(Chris)PIGS WITH THEIRFAT, UGLY WIVES
386
00:15:55,887 --> 00:15:57,455
THAT THEY TRY TO MAKE LOVE TO
387
00:15:57,522 --> 00:16:00,190
UNSUCCESSFULLY EVERY NIGHTAFTER THEY COME HOME
388
00:16:00,258 --> 00:16:02,178
FROM AN EVENINGWITH THEIR PROSTITUTEGIRLFRIENDS,
389
00:16:02,193 --> 00:16:06,263
AND A DAY OF COLLECTING GRAFTAND BEATING UPOLD LADY JAYWALKERS.
390
00:16:06,331 --> 00:16:07,931
MR. PETERSON?
YES.
391
00:16:07,999 --> 00:16:10,233
WE CAN HEAR EVERYTHING
YOU'RE SAYING.
392
00:16:10,302 --> 00:16:11,501
OH. OH.
393
00:16:11,569 --> 00:16:13,804
[titters]
394
00:16:13,872 --> 00:16:16,973
WELL I WAS JUST READINGFROM TODAY'S FAMILY CIRCUS
COMIC OUT LOUD.
395
00:16:17,041 --> 00:16:18,475
[knocking on door]
396
00:16:18,543 --> 00:16:20,877
OH, HUH, OK.
397
00:16:21,046 --> 00:16:24,748
OK. OK. THIS IS IT.
THIS IS IT.
398
00:16:24,816 --> 00:16:27,718
LET'S GET IT ON.
399
00:16:27,785 --> 00:16:30,388
HI, GUYS.
WELCOME TO MY STING.
I MEAN, MY STINK.
400
00:16:30,455 --> 00:16:33,490
I MEAN... I MEAN,
MY... MY STINKING ROOM.
401
00:16:33,592 --> 00:16:35,459
VIC, WE'RE GETTING
TO BE OLD CHUMS,
AREN'T WE?
402
00:16:35,527 --> 00:16:37,727
LET'S NOT PUSH IT.
HERE'S YOUR PANTS.
403
00:16:37,795 --> 00:16:39,963
OH, THANK YOU. MERCI.
404
00:16:42,100 --> 00:16:43,667
WHO'S YOUR
LITTLE FRIEND, VIC?
405
00:16:43,735 --> 00:16:46,436
UH, THIS IS, UM, TOM.
406
00:16:46,504 --> 00:16:47,938
HOW YOU DOIN'?
407
00:16:48,006 --> 00:16:49,807
WELL, HOW YOU DOIN', TOM?
408
00:16:49,875 --> 00:16:52,409
TOM? AS IN, UH, AS IN TOMMY?
409
00:16:52,477 --> 00:16:54,845
UH, AS IS THE PINBALL WIZARD?
410
00:16:54,913 --> 00:16:58,048
WE GONNA GET THE MONEY OR NOT?
I'M A BUSY MAN.
411
00:16:58,116 --> 00:16:59,349
YEAH, I GOT THE MONEY.
412
00:16:59,417 --> 00:17:00,684
YOU GOT THE WATCHES?
413
00:17:00,752 --> 00:17:02,352
I GOT THE WATCHES.
414
00:17:02,420 --> 00:17:04,621
BUT FIRST
I GOTTA SEE THE CASH.
415
00:17:04,689 --> 00:17:06,623
OH, I SEE,
SO IT'S ONE OF THOSE
416
00:17:06,691 --> 00:17:09,226
"I'LL SHOW YOU MINE
IF YOU SHOW ME YOURS FIRST"
THINGS, HUH?
417
00:17:09,294 --> 00:17:11,862
WOULD YOU
CUT THE CRAP?
418
00:17:11,864 --> 00:17:13,930
(Vic)CAN WE GET SOME BUSINESS HEREOR NOT?
419
00:17:14,733 --> 00:17:16,366
OK. ALL RIGHT.
I'M COOL. I'M COOL.
420
00:17:16,434 --> 00:17:20,437
I'M COOLED WITH IT, DADDY-O.
OK, EVERYONE'S COOL. COOL-OH.
421
00:17:20,504 --> 00:17:22,206
I AM GONNA KILL HIM.
422
00:17:22,273 --> 00:17:24,775
GIVE HIM THE MONEY,
YOU MORON.
423
00:17:24,843 --> 00:17:26,710
DON'T CALL ME A MORON.
424
00:17:26,778 --> 00:17:28,379
WHAT IS IT
WITH THIS GUY?
425
00:17:28,413 --> 00:17:29,847
HE'S STARTING
TO MAKE ME NERVOUS.
426
00:17:29,914 --> 00:17:32,750
HEY, HE'S NOT SOME
KIND OF PSYCHO, IS HE?
427
00:17:34,285 --> 00:17:36,220
WHAT'S IN YOUR EAR THERE,
COWBOY?
428
00:17:36,222 --> 00:17:37,620
OH, UH, HEH, HEH,
429
00:17:37,688 --> 00:17:40,423
I SEE YOU'VE NOTICED
MY, UH, HEARING AID/
430
00:17:40,491 --> 00:17:45,195
UH, RADIO/
UH, SPORTS ANNOUNCING THING...
431
00:17:45,263 --> 00:17:47,765
UH-OH. OH.
CASSIUS CLAY'S OUT.
432
00:17:47,832 --> 00:17:51,152
UH, HE'S BEEN K.O.'ED
BY ARNOLD PALMER
IN THE 4TH QUARTER.
433
00:17:53,471 --> 00:17:54,571
(Richardson) YOU DUMBASS.
434
00:17:54,639 --> 00:17:55,672
WHAT?
435
00:17:55,740 --> 00:17:57,441
GET AWAY FROM THERE!
436
00:17:58,142 --> 00:17:59,243
OH, OK,
437
00:17:59,311 --> 00:18:00,911
ALL RIGHT.
438
00:18:00,978 --> 00:18:03,214
AS SIR MONTY HALL
USED TO SAY:
439
00:18:03,281 --> 00:18:06,617
"LET US NOW
MAKE A DEAL, SQUIRES."
440
00:18:06,685 --> 00:18:09,519
HI, HONEY,
LOOK WHAT I MADE,
SOME FUDGE.
441
00:18:09,588 --> 00:18:11,956
OH, HI, MA.
GREAT FUDGE.
442
00:18:12,023 --> 00:18:13,824
WHO WANTS FUDGE?
443
00:18:13,892 --> 00:18:15,592
I'M GONNA STRANGLE HIM!
444
00:18:16,894 --> 00:18:18,795
AREN'T YOU, UH,
GOING TO INTRODUCE US
445
00:18:18,864 --> 00:18:21,198
TO YOUR
SLEAZY-LOOKING FRIENDS?
446
00:18:21,266 --> 00:18:22,599
SURE, DAD.
447
00:18:22,667 --> 00:18:25,969
UH, THIS IS TOM AND VIC.
WE'RE DOING A LITTLE
BUSINESS TOGETHER.
448
00:18:26,037 --> 00:18:28,806
HOW CUTE.
ARE YOU TWO PAPERBOYS?
449
00:18:29,340 --> 00:18:31,475
NO, MA'AM.
450
00:18:31,542 --> 00:18:33,911
THAT'S ONE HELL
OF A LEATHER JACKET.
451
00:18:33,979 --> 00:18:37,014
YOU MAY THINK IT'S CLASSY,
BUT IT MAKES YOU
LOOK CHEAP, BOY.
452
00:18:37,081 --> 00:18:38,415
[inaudible]
453
00:18:38,482 --> 00:18:40,884
GET THEM THE HELL
OUT OF THERE, NOW.
454
00:18:40,952 --> 00:18:43,072
OH, OK, WELL, THANK YOU
FOR THE FASHION REVIEW, DAD.
455
00:18:43,121 --> 00:18:45,589
I'VE BEEN TOLD
IT'S TIME TO GET YOU
THE HELL OUT OF HERE NOW.
456
00:18:45,657 --> 00:18:47,925
SO THANK YOU FOR STOPPING BY.
OFF YOU GO.
457
00:18:47,992 --> 00:18:51,629
OK. WATCH THE STEPS.
SEE YOU AT BREAKFAST.
BYE-BYE.
458
00:18:51,696 --> 00:18:53,263
[sighs]
459
00:18:53,331 --> 00:18:54,832
LOOK, KID,
YOU'VE GOT 30 SECONDS
TO MAKE THIS DEAL,
460
00:18:54,899 --> 00:18:55,900
OR I'M OUTTA HERE.
461
00:18:55,967 --> 00:18:58,401
OK. OK. LET'S DO IT.
462
00:18:58,469 --> 00:18:59,670
COME ON OVER, TOM.
463
00:19:00,939 --> 00:19:03,173
WHY DON'T YOU SITRIGHT THERE ON THE SOFA.
464
00:19:03,241 --> 00:19:05,108
AND, VIC, YOU COME ON OVER HERE
465
00:19:05,176 --> 00:19:07,878
AND YOU HAVE A SEATRIGHT NEXTTO YOUR BUDDY TOM.
466
00:19:07,880 --> 00:19:10,180
AND MAKE YOURSELFCOMFORTABLEAND JUST FOR ME, VIC,
467
00:19:10,248 --> 00:19:13,683
WHY DON'T YOU JUSTPOSITION YOUR BODYTHAT WAY? THAT'D BE GREAT.
468
00:19:13,751 --> 00:19:15,992
LET ME JUST FIX THAT FOR YOU.
469
00:19:16,788 --> 00:19:18,656
OK AND, TOM,YOU'RE RIGHT THERE.
470
00:19:18,723 --> 00:19:20,858
HERE WE GO, I'VE GOT THE MONEY.
471
00:19:20,925 --> 00:19:22,492
ALL RIGHT NOW.
472
00:19:22,560 --> 00:19:23,593
[sighs]
473
00:19:23,661 --> 00:19:26,730
LET'S SEE, HERE'S MY MONEY.
474
00:19:26,797 --> 00:19:28,933
NOW LET'S LOOK
AT ALL THOSE WATCHES, HUH?
475
00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:30,334
[chuckles]
476
00:19:32,037 --> 00:19:35,538
WOW. LOOK ATALL THESE WATCHES
477
00:19:35,606 --> 00:19:38,408
THAT I JUST PAID FOR.
478
00:19:38,476 --> 00:19:40,243
[laughs]
479
00:19:40,311 --> 00:19:42,980
MOVE, YOU JERK.
YOU'RE BLOCKING THE CAMERA.
480
00:19:43,048 --> 00:19:44,715
WHAT?
481
00:19:44,782 --> 00:19:46,717
GET YOUR BUTT
OUTTA THE CAMERA,
WE MISSED EVERYTHING!
482
00:19:46,784 --> 00:19:48,719
OH. OH, JEEZ.
483
00:19:48,786 --> 00:19:52,589
OH, OH, UH, UM...
484
00:19:52,657 --> 00:19:55,192
HEY, TOM? YOU KNOW
WHAT WOULD BE A FUN IDEA?
485
00:19:55,260 --> 00:19:57,027
WHY DON'T I JUST
GIVE YOU THIS MONEY BACK
486
00:19:57,095 --> 00:19:58,762
AND THEN YOU GIVE ME
THE WATCHES BACK?
487
00:19:58,829 --> 00:20:00,930
WE CAN PRETEND IT'S KIND OF
LIKE AN INSTANT REPLAY?
488
00:20:00,998 --> 00:20:02,031
LIKE A LITTLE SKIT?
489
00:20:02,099 --> 00:20:03,400
WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?
490
00:20:03,468 --> 00:20:05,869
WHOA, WHOA, WHOA.
WAIT A MINUTE HERE.
491
00:20:05,937 --> 00:20:07,070
WHAT?
492
00:20:13,477 --> 00:20:15,979
OK, GUYS, BEFORE YOU JUMP
TO CONCLUSIONS,
493
00:20:16,047 --> 00:20:18,182
I HAVE TO WEAR
A CONCEALED POLICE MICROPHONE
494
00:20:18,249 --> 00:20:20,017
FOR MEDICAL REASONS.
495
00:20:22,053 --> 00:20:23,687
[quavering]
496
00:20:23,755 --> 00:20:25,789
[inaudible]
497
00:20:25,856 --> 00:20:28,291
VIC, CHECK THIS OUT.I DON'T BELIEVE THIS.
498
00:20:28,360 --> 00:20:30,360
THE DORK.HE SET US UP!
499
00:20:32,597 --> 00:20:34,631
ALL RIGHT, WAIT A MINUTE,
WAIT A MINUTE. WAIT.
500
00:20:34,698 --> 00:20:36,499
WE'RE IN THE CLEAR HERE.
HE'S GOT THE CASH.
501
00:20:36,635 --> 00:20:38,135
WE'RE NOT HOLDIN' ANYTHING.
502
00:20:38,202 --> 00:20:39,769
THE MERCHANDISE
IS SAFE IN HERE.
503
00:20:39,837 --> 00:20:42,005
THEY CAN'T OPEN IT
WITHOUT A WARRANT.
504
00:20:42,073 --> 00:20:44,841
MAN. YOU KNOW THE LAW,
JOHN-JOHN.
505
00:20:45,843 --> 00:20:47,043
HEY, I'VE GOT A FUNNY IDEA.
506
00:20:47,111 --> 00:20:48,979
COME ON DOWN HERE TOM..
507
00:20:49,046 --> 00:20:50,847
WHY DON'T YOU GUYSTAKE THIS MONEY BACKJUST FOR THE HELL OF IT.
508
00:20:50,915 --> 00:20:53,016
GO AHEAD, TAKE IT BACKAND I'LL TAKE THIS BACK.
509
00:20:53,084 --> 00:20:55,753
COME ON, WOULDN'T THATSIMPLY BE DAFFYIF WE DID THAT?
510
00:20:55,820 --> 00:20:56,853
OH.
511
00:20:56,921 --> 00:20:58,188
[sighing]
512
00:20:59,491 --> 00:21:00,924
BYE-BYE, BOYS.
513
00:21:04,896 --> 00:21:06,463
NO!
514
00:21:19,277 --> 00:21:23,146
HEY, I DIDN'T KNOW
THOSE CAME
IN ALL THOSE COLORS.
515
00:21:23,214 --> 00:21:25,015
OK, SCUMBAGS.
UP AGAINST THE WALL.
516
00:21:25,083 --> 00:21:27,084
LET'S GO, MOVE IT.
MOVE.
517
00:21:27,818 --> 00:21:28,852
KEEP YOUR HANDS UP.
518
00:21:28,920 --> 00:21:31,621
NOT YOU, PETERSON.
THE OTHER SCUMBAGS.
519
00:21:31,689 --> 00:21:34,091
(Vic)
WHAT'S THE HASSLE, MAN?
WE DIDN'T DO ANYTHING.
520
00:21:34,158 --> 00:21:36,827
OH, YEAH?
WHAT ARE THESE?
521
00:21:36,895 --> 00:21:38,495
PARTY FAVORS?
522
00:21:38,562 --> 00:21:40,230
AND MOST IMPORTANTLY,
523
00:21:40,298 --> 00:21:42,666
WE'VE GOT YOU
FOR DESTROYING
A POLICE CAMERA.
524
00:21:42,734 --> 00:21:45,635
FOR THAT ALONE
YOU'RE LOOKIN'
AT 60 YEARS, PAL.
525
00:21:45,703 --> 00:21:47,864
ACTUALLY, THE GOOD NEWS IS
I THINK IT'S JUST SCRATCHED.
526
00:21:47,906 --> 00:21:49,239
I DON'T THINK
IT'S REALLY BROKEN.
527
00:21:49,307 --> 00:21:50,773
(Richardson) SHUT UP.
528
00:21:50,841 --> 00:21:53,009
OK, MEN, TIME
TO TAKE OUT THE GARBAGE.
529
00:21:54,245 --> 00:21:55,679
[chattering]
530
00:21:56,448 --> 00:21:58,148
WHOO.
531
00:21:58,215 --> 00:22:01,484
WELL, MR. SCREAM-IN-MY-EAR-
ALL-NIGHT.
532
00:22:01,486 --> 00:22:03,687
IT WAS A LITTLE
TOUCH-AND-GO THERE
FOR A BIT,
533
00:22:03,755 --> 00:22:05,989
BUT, UH,
THANKS TO MY PATENTED
LITTLE TRIP-TRAP HERE,
534
00:22:06,057 --> 00:22:08,825
WE MANAGED TO CAPTURE
A COUPLE OF BAD APPLES
TONIGHT.
535
00:22:08,893 --> 00:22:11,562
WELL, EVEN THOUGH
MY METHODS WERE
A LITTLE UNCONVENTIONAL
536
00:22:11,629 --> 00:22:13,329
AND MAY HAVE RATTLED YOU
AT TIMES,
537
00:22:13,397 --> 00:22:16,767
I... I THINK YOU HAVE TO AGREE
THAT IN THE END
THEY WERE QUITE EFFECTIVE.
538
00:22:16,834 --> 00:22:19,870
BUT YOU KNOW,
I WANT TO COMMEND YOU
ON YOUR PROFESSIONALISM...
539
00:22:19,937 --> 00:22:21,171
[sighing]
540
00:22:21,238 --> 00:22:22,958
BECAUSE I, FOR ONE,
FEEL SAFER AT NIGHT
541
00:22:22,974 --> 00:22:26,309
KNOWING THAT MEN LIKE YOU
ARE OUT THERE
TO PROTECT MEN LIKE ME.
542
00:22:26,377 --> 00:22:27,610
[gun firing]
543
00:22:27,678 --> 00:22:29,178
[Chris groaning]41089
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