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1
00:00:24,890 --> 00:00:25,310
(air whooshing)
2
00:00:27,730 --> 00:00:28,140
- Jim, Jim, Jim.
3
00:00:36,610 --> 00:00:37,780
Come up here, I've got
something to tell you.
4
00:00:40,570 --> 00:00:41,150
(footsteps approaching)
5
00:00:43,910 --> 00:00:44,780
Don't hurry yourself, will you?
6
00:00:45,580 --> 00:00:45,910
- No.
7
00:00:45,990 --> 00:00:47,450
- Height of the season and
you're flicking stones.
8
00:00:47,620 --> 00:00:48,700
You're missing a better
custom, aren't you?
9
00:00:48,870 --> 00:00:49,120
- Where?
10
00:00:49,290 --> 00:00:49,910
- Back there.
11
00:00:49,910 --> 00:00:50,700
Don't look around.
12
00:00:50,870 --> 00:00:52,040
Don't forget, ride behind,
smile when you take her money.
13
00:00:53,500 --> 00:00:54,290
Now, before she scarpers.
14
00:00:55,790 --> 00:00:56,920
We can't afford to
have them sitting down
15
00:00:57,130 --> 00:00:57,920
for nothing, you know?
16
00:01:08,970 --> 00:01:09,850
- Good morning, my love.
17
00:01:10,770 --> 00:01:11,930
And what do I charge
for parking space?
18
00:01:12,350 --> 00:01:13,890
- I'm sorry about that madam,
he's apt to overstep himself.
19
00:01:17,940 --> 00:01:18,730
- Ha-ha, what a target!
20
00:01:20,650 --> 00:01:21,110
(Jim laughs)
21
00:01:22,650 --> 00:01:23,070
Where you been?
22
00:01:23,940 --> 00:01:24,530
- We all make mistakes.
23
00:01:24,940 --> 00:01:25,490
- Yeah (laughs).
24
00:01:30,160 --> 00:01:31,280
- Don't know what
you're laughing at.
25
00:01:31,870 --> 00:01:32,950
There's one on the
end of the pier.
26
00:01:33,740 --> 00:01:34,330
- End of the pier?
27
00:01:34,540 --> 00:01:35,120
- End of the pier.
28
00:01:35,290 --> 00:01:36,410
- Yeah, I'll drop
you a postcard.
29
00:01:38,170 --> 00:01:38,830
(dramatic music)
30
00:03:40,450 --> 00:03:41,070
- [Henry] Season ticket.
31
00:03:48,080 --> 00:03:48,660
(piano music)
32
00:04:01,420 --> 00:04:02,170
- It's all go dear, ain't it?
33
00:04:13,100 --> 00:04:13,730
- One more.
34
00:04:15,480 --> 00:04:16,650
- Hey, what do you
feed this camel on?
35
00:04:17,400 --> 00:04:18,110
Moth balls?
36
00:04:18,190 --> 00:04:18,900
- Hold it.
37
00:04:19,110 --> 00:04:20,110
If things don't
brighten up soon,
38
00:04:20,360 --> 00:04:21,530
I'm flogging it to a
Chinese restaurant.
39
00:04:23,110 --> 00:04:23,900
- You'll get a good price mate,
40
00:04:24,070 --> 00:04:25,280
it's grown another hump
since it's been down here.
41
00:04:26,030 --> 00:04:27,070
- What this place needs
is as squib up it.
42
00:04:28,450 --> 00:04:29,120
- So does this camel.
43
00:04:35,870 --> 00:04:36,460
(instrumental music)
44
00:05:22,920 --> 00:05:24,170
I don't know why I let you
talk me into coming down here
45
00:05:25,090 --> 00:05:26,290
and get playing nursemaid
a lot of empty deck chairs.
46
00:05:28,880 --> 00:05:29,630
That's right, wipe your feet.
47
00:05:31,170 --> 00:05:32,130
Look, stop going
round and round,
48
00:05:32,840 --> 00:05:33,590
you're making me feel giddy.
49
00:05:34,180 --> 00:05:35,550
You're like some big fat copper
watching me all the time.
50
00:05:37,140 --> 00:05:38,180
You're supposed to be
entertainment officer,
51
00:05:38,680 --> 00:05:39,810
well, so we'll get
your finger out.
52
00:05:40,180 --> 00:05:41,180
- Well, Rome wasn't
built in a day, was it?
53
00:05:42,020 --> 00:05:43,190
- No, and they had a better
place to build it, didn't they?
54
00:05:44,190 --> 00:05:45,600
- By tradition, that flag
should have been down
55
00:05:46,230 --> 00:05:46,900
15 minutes ago.
56
00:05:47,480 --> 00:05:47,980
- Yeah.
57
00:05:48,150 --> 00:05:48,900
- That's not the way to do it.
58
00:05:49,190 --> 00:05:49,650
Here, come here.
59
00:05:53,360 --> 00:05:53,860
Right?
60
00:05:54,190 --> 00:05:54,660
- Yeah.
61
00:05:56,780 --> 00:05:57,530
- Big Monster Carnival tonight?
62
00:05:58,080 --> 00:05:58,320
- Yeah.
63
00:06:01,290 --> 00:06:02,120
Got any spare tickets?
64
00:06:02,200 --> 00:06:02,960
- Oh, I don't know.
65
00:06:03,120 --> 00:06:04,200
You know, they're in big
demand, big attraction.
66
00:06:05,250 --> 00:06:06,080
How many do you want?
67
00:06:06,210 --> 00:06:06,870
- Just Judy and me.
68
00:06:07,210 --> 00:06:07,670
- Only two?
69
00:06:08,790 --> 00:06:09,380
Well, don't be late.
70
00:06:11,210 --> 00:06:12,210
Hey, what am I gonna
do with the flag?
71
00:06:12,760 --> 00:06:13,340
- Give you two guesses.
72
00:06:22,680 --> 00:06:23,430
- 15 minutes late with the flag.
73
00:06:24,640 --> 00:06:25,390
- Good evening, Mr. Mayor, sir.
74
00:06:26,140 --> 00:06:26,560
- Good evening.
75
00:06:28,230 --> 00:06:28,940
Very sparse along here?
76
00:06:29,230 --> 00:06:30,650
- Well, they're all having
dinner just now, sir,
77
00:06:30,810 --> 00:06:32,230
but they'll be out later on
for the Monster Carnival.
78
00:06:33,230 --> 00:06:34,570
Should be a sellout with
your kind of participation.
79
00:06:35,570 --> 00:06:36,650
- I was thinking it's
not fitting for me
80
00:06:37,240 --> 00:06:38,150
to appear this Monster Carnival.
81
00:06:39,200 --> 00:06:40,240
- Oh, but think of
the disappointment.
82
00:06:40,950 --> 00:06:41,990
It's the biggest
event in our calendar.
83
00:06:43,120 --> 00:06:43,870
- It better be for your sake.
84
00:06:45,620 --> 00:06:46,240
- Don't you worry.
85
00:06:47,700 --> 00:06:48,290
- I'm not worried.
86
00:06:56,130 --> 00:06:57,300
- Come along son, does your
mother know you're out?
87
00:06:59,300 --> 00:07:00,260
Wait a minute, let me check.
88
00:07:00,340 --> 00:07:01,380
I think you're a
girl, you are a girl.
89
00:07:05,760 --> 00:07:06,350
What you got there?
90
00:07:06,850 --> 00:07:07,430
- "The Good Book."
91
00:07:09,060 --> 00:07:10,270
- You're telling me
stories, aren't you?
92
00:07:10,310 --> 00:07:11,270
That's an airline timetable.
93
00:07:12,390 --> 00:07:13,520
- Did you know that
I could be in Rome
94
00:07:14,560 --> 00:07:15,310
by this time tomorrow night,
95
00:07:16,270 --> 00:07:17,270
or I could be in New
York by the next day?
96
00:07:19,280 --> 00:07:20,400
- You can't go to New
York just like that.
97
00:07:20,610 --> 00:07:22,070
- I can too, I've always
saved the plane fare home
98
00:07:24,410 --> 00:07:25,410
just in case
anything went wrong.
99
00:07:26,280 --> 00:07:27,240
- Well, you can't go tonight.
100
00:07:28,080 --> 00:07:29,280
We've got to go to Henry's
Monster Gala Carnival.
101
00:07:30,620 --> 00:07:31,750
- Oh, I'm covering it
anyway for The Gazette.
102
00:07:32,950 --> 00:07:34,290
- They give you all the big
assignments, don't they?
103
00:07:35,290 --> 00:07:36,290
- They should, I'm
the only reporter
104
00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:39,040
with international
experience on the paper.
105
00:07:40,380 --> 00:07:41,880
- [Jim] What was Gormleigh's
international correspondent
106
00:07:43,010 --> 00:07:44,090
doing missing her coffee
break this morning?
107
00:07:46,300 --> 00:07:46,800
- Very big deal.
108
00:07:48,390 --> 00:07:49,050
Baby show.
109
00:07:50,390 --> 00:07:51,300
- Bet you won first prize.
110
00:07:59,310 --> 00:08:00,440
You're not thinking
of moving on, are you?
111
00:08:02,610 --> 00:08:03,320
- I don't know, are you?
112
00:08:05,240 --> 00:08:05,490
- Me?
113
00:08:05,940 --> 00:08:07,110
No, I'm here for the
rest of the season.
114
00:08:09,490 --> 00:08:10,950
Why don't you stick around,
you might learn something?
115
00:08:13,410 --> 00:08:13,910
- Maybe.
116
00:08:14,700 --> 00:08:16,200
- Oh, the Carnival's fancy
dress, put on a dress.
117
00:08:20,710 --> 00:08:21,330
Come as a girl.
118
00:08:21,630 --> 00:08:22,750
- Why don't you go
and play in traffic?
119
00:08:26,340 --> 00:08:26,840
(mood music)
120
00:08:45,060 --> 00:08:45,810
- Bit draughty around there boy.
121
00:08:50,690 --> 00:08:51,820
Must be getting
near feeding time.
122
00:08:52,740 --> 00:08:53,360
- Do you mind?
123
00:08:53,950 --> 00:08:54,360
I'm on duty.
124
00:08:54,530 --> 00:08:55,700
- Lovely turn out,
marvelous evening.
125
00:08:56,410 --> 00:08:57,530
- At least there's
room to move, oops!
126
00:08:59,120 --> 00:09:00,370
- You'd never think she was an
intellectual now, would you?
127
00:09:01,370 --> 00:09:02,500
- Things are picking up, there's
still more than last week.
128
00:09:06,040 --> 00:09:07,130
I think they're about
ready for it now.
129
00:09:07,710 --> 00:09:08,840
Okay, Horace, let
the balloons go.
130
00:09:25,230 --> 00:09:25,480
- Ow!
131
00:09:40,410 --> 00:09:41,410
Don't just stand
there, come on, skate.
132
00:09:42,870 --> 00:09:43,620
- No, I don't wanna show you up.
133
00:09:45,080 --> 00:09:45,660
I'll stay with Henry.
134
00:09:48,210 --> 00:09:48,790
He needs my support.
135
00:09:50,380 --> 00:09:50,960
- Is that the time?
136
00:09:51,420 --> 00:09:51,920
- Yeah.
137
00:09:52,130 --> 00:09:52,710
- Oh, fancy dress.
138
00:09:53,040 --> 00:09:53,630
- Mind how you go.
139
00:09:54,420 --> 00:09:55,000
(Henry screams)
140
00:09:57,090 --> 00:09:57,670
There he goes again.
141
00:10:04,430 --> 00:10:05,140
Get a load of Henry.
142
00:10:05,640 --> 00:10:06,310
More, more.
143
00:10:07,600 --> 00:10:08,430
- Will you stop niggling him?
144
00:10:08,770 --> 00:10:09,890
- He doesn't mind,
he's my friend.
145
00:10:10,060 --> 00:10:11,140
- Yeah, well, I bet he's
lost a lot more hair
146
00:10:11,900 --> 00:10:12,480
since you arrived.
147
00:10:12,650 --> 00:10:13,730
- Yeah, we used to call
him curly at school.
148
00:10:14,520 --> 00:10:15,650
lovely little fellow,
a little round face.
149
00:10:16,520 --> 00:10:17,690
- You know, he got
you your job here.
150
00:10:18,440 --> 00:10:19,530
- Look, I could have
got a job anywhere.
151
00:10:19,690 --> 00:10:21,110
Southend, Margate, Ramsgate,
I could have earned much
152
00:10:21,440 --> 00:10:22,820
more than I'm earning now,
and that's a dead cert.
153
00:10:24,320 --> 00:10:25,370
- That really bothers
you, doesn't it?
154
00:10:26,120 --> 00:10:26,870
That he's got such a good job.
155
00:10:27,620 --> 00:10:28,450
- Call that a job?
156
00:10:28,530 --> 00:10:29,450
I call that a living death.
157
00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:30,750
- You can't even stay put,
158
00:10:30,960 --> 00:10:32,120
you move from one
place to another.
159
00:10:32,960 --> 00:10:33,540
- That's flexibility.
160
00:10:34,290 --> 00:10:34,710
- Flexibility?
161
00:10:35,670 --> 00:10:36,460
You're kidding yourself.
162
00:10:36,790 --> 00:10:38,130
- What about you charging
all over the world
163
00:10:39,050 --> 00:10:39,630
working in coffee bars?
164
00:10:40,460 --> 00:10:41,510
- That's different,
I'm a writer.
165
00:10:42,840 --> 00:10:43,460
- You're joking.
166
00:10:43,460 --> 00:10:44,550
- You know, I majored
in psychology at school,
167
00:10:45,340 --> 00:10:46,550
and I probably know a lot
more about your problems
168
00:10:48,050 --> 00:10:48,470
than you do.
169
00:10:50,310 --> 00:10:50,890
- Help me, doctor.
170
00:10:51,890 --> 00:10:52,470
I'm so mixed up.
171
00:10:53,180 --> 00:10:53,930
- A fine attitude to take.
172
00:10:54,100 --> 00:10:55,270
- Lie on the couch
with me, doctor,
173
00:10:55,850 --> 00:10:56,980
and let's discuss our
problems together.
174
00:10:58,730 --> 00:10:59,520
- You're really impossible.
175
00:11:00,770 --> 00:11:01,480
- Give me a kiss.
176
00:11:04,480 --> 00:11:05,280
- Sex rears its ugly head again.
177
00:11:06,570 --> 00:11:07,110
- Sex?
178
00:11:07,280 --> 00:11:08,410
Don't mention that
word, drives me batty.
179
00:11:09,570 --> 00:11:10,740
- You can't be original
about the whole thing.
180
00:11:12,490 --> 00:11:12,950
- Talk to me.
181
00:11:13,490 --> 00:11:14,490
- Ladies and
gentlemen, your judge
182
00:11:15,490 --> 00:11:16,870
for the Monster Gala Carnival
fancy dress competition,
183
00:11:20,250 --> 00:11:21,500
supported by the rest of
the members of his council,
184
00:11:24,460 --> 00:11:25,050
his worship, the Mayor.
185
00:11:27,170 --> 00:11:27,590
(cool music)
186
00:11:58,410 --> 00:11:58,830
(Henry laughs)
187
00:11:59,000 --> 00:11:59,750
- Quite a good turnout, sir.
188
00:12:01,290 --> 00:12:01,910
Two more than last week.
189
00:12:02,540 --> 00:12:03,960
I've got a whole selection
of talent lined up for you.
190
00:12:10,050 --> 00:12:10,550
- Oh, really?
191
00:12:12,380 --> 00:12:12,670
- Yeah.
192
00:12:24,640 --> 00:12:25,310
Eve, snake.
193
00:12:29,560 --> 00:12:30,520
What a discerning choice, sir.
194
00:12:32,570 --> 00:12:33,360
- Many congratulations, my dear.
195
00:12:35,950 --> 00:12:36,780
What an interesting costume?
196
00:12:37,530 --> 00:12:38,700
- Miss Adams is also one
of the town hall employees.
197
00:12:40,370 --> 00:12:41,450
She works in the
accounts department.
198
00:12:42,490 --> 00:12:43,080
- How nice, I must come
199
00:12:44,250 --> 00:12:45,290
and check the figures
myself someday.
200
00:12:46,580 --> 00:12:47,330
- Oh, dear, oh dear (laughs).
201
00:12:53,250 --> 00:12:53,670
(Henry screams)
202
00:13:02,470 --> 00:13:03,640
- You shouldn't go around
dressed up as a girl.
203
00:13:04,010 --> 00:13:04,760
- I thought you'd appreciate it.
204
00:13:05,600 --> 00:13:06,180
- Oh, I do.
205
00:13:06,970 --> 00:13:07,600
- Poor Henry.
206
00:13:07,680 --> 00:13:08,600
- What a fiasco that was.
207
00:13:08,680 --> 00:13:10,230
All that palaver just to fix
up a scrubber for the Mayor.
208
00:13:15,190 --> 00:13:16,360
- What Gormleigh
needs is a few ideas.
209
00:13:17,360 --> 00:13:18,150
In America, we'd really know
210
00:13:18,610 --> 00:13:19,610
how to promote a
place like this.
211
00:13:19,610 --> 00:13:20,700
- Look, all this place
needs is populating.
212
00:13:22,320 --> 00:13:22,740
- Yeah, but how?
213
00:13:22,910 --> 00:13:23,990
- Well, I'm a boy,
you're a girl.
214
00:13:25,620 --> 00:13:26,330
That's a good start.
215
00:13:26,580 --> 00:13:27,620
Let's permutate around
that for a while.
216
00:13:27,950 --> 00:13:29,080
- Now we're back to
sex again, are we?
217
00:13:29,620 --> 00:13:31,000
Give you a deserted beach and
you revert to the obvious.
218
00:13:32,500 --> 00:13:33,620
- Yeah, what's wrong
with the obvious?
219
00:13:33,830 --> 00:13:35,000
- I'll tell you what is
wrong with the obvious,
220
00:13:37,800 --> 00:13:38,630
it's too obvious.
221
00:13:39,170 --> 00:13:40,630
- Come on, look, if you're
going to be a famous writer
222
00:13:41,710 --> 00:13:42,550
you got to live a hit.
223
00:13:42,760 --> 00:13:43,430
Give the... oh!
224
00:13:56,640 --> 00:13:57,270
- Just look at me.
225
00:13:58,650 --> 00:13:59,150
(Jim laughs)
226
00:14:00,610 --> 00:14:01,650
- I can see through
your clothes.
227
00:14:03,070 --> 00:14:03,650
- Well, then don't look.
228
00:14:05,650 --> 00:14:06,860
- If this was a Bridget
Bardot film we'd play
229
00:14:07,660 --> 00:14:08,370
a sexy love scene now.
230
00:14:09,660 --> 00:14:10,530
- Well, she's in St. Tropez.
231
00:14:11,290 --> 00:14:11,870
This is Gormleigh.
232
00:14:12,660 --> 00:14:13,250
- Oh, I'm sorry, Judy.
233
00:14:14,290 --> 00:14:15,040
Judy, I'm sorry, darling.
234
00:14:15,660 --> 00:14:16,660
- You say that once more.
235
00:14:18,120 --> 00:14:18,670
- I'm sorry.
236
00:14:18,750 --> 00:14:19,670
- I'm sorry too, I'm also wet.
237
00:14:21,420 --> 00:14:22,000
- Yeah, but I am sorry.
238
00:14:22,170 --> 00:14:23,250
- You've got a marvelous
command of language.
239
00:14:24,460 --> 00:14:24,880
What are you?
240
00:14:25,260 --> 00:14:25,670
A linguist?
241
00:14:25,880 --> 00:14:26,670
- Well, it's only water.
242
00:14:27,050 --> 00:14:27,670
- And so perspective.
243
00:14:28,670 --> 00:14:29,550
- Where's your sense of humor?
244
00:14:30,340 --> 00:14:30,930
- That got wet too.
245
00:14:31,680 --> 00:14:33,010
- Yeah, well, I said I'm
sorry, it was an accident.
246
00:14:35,060 --> 00:14:36,470
- I fall in the water and
all you can talk about
247
00:14:37,680 --> 00:14:38,440
is Bridget Bardot.
248
00:14:39,100 --> 00:14:39,680
- I'm sorry.
249
00:14:39,690 --> 00:14:40,850
- You don't know the
meaning of the word.
250
00:14:41,020 --> 00:14:41,690
- Oh, I don't know.
251
00:14:42,310 --> 00:14:43,440
All this fuss about
falling in the water?
252
00:14:44,070 --> 00:14:45,480
Bardot does it all the
time, what a personality.
253
00:14:46,780 --> 00:14:48,190
Do you know St. Tropez was
nothing before she went there?
254
00:14:49,280 --> 00:14:50,400
What we ought to do is
bring in the Gormleigh.
255
00:14:51,280 --> 00:14:52,030
Now there's a story for you.
256
00:14:52,910 --> 00:14:53,700
- That's ridiculous.
257
00:14:53,700 --> 00:14:55,080
- Anyway, I was forgetting
you couldn't get that printed,
258
00:14:55,830 --> 00:14:56,490
it's too big.
259
00:14:56,660 --> 00:14:57,700
- Oh, now just to
wait one minute.
260
00:14:57,870 --> 00:14:58,950
I can get anything
printed in that paper.
261
00:14:59,870 --> 00:15:00,700
- All right, you do that.
262
00:15:00,870 --> 00:15:02,000
What we want is
Bardot, not Bingo.
263
00:15:03,330 --> 00:15:03,920
- All right, I will.
264
00:15:04,080 --> 00:15:05,420
All you can do is
daydream about sex bombs.
265
00:15:08,380 --> 00:15:09,460
- See you tomorrow
morning, Judy.
266
00:15:14,590 --> 00:15:15,180
(instrumental music)
267
00:15:45,330 --> 00:15:45,750
Hard at it, pop?
268
00:15:45,910 --> 00:15:47,040
- Yeah, we've got it
looking nice for B.B.
269
00:16:12,860 --> 00:16:13,770
- Good morning, good morning.
270
00:16:14,280 --> 00:16:15,360
- I've made you some
coffee, American style.
271
00:16:17,400 --> 00:16:17,990
- Great, great, great.
272
00:16:20,280 --> 00:16:21,030
Sorry I got you wet last night.
273
00:16:21,620 --> 00:16:22,200
- It served me right.
274
00:16:22,990 --> 00:16:23,780
I was nagging you, wasn't I?
275
00:16:23,910 --> 00:16:25,030
- No, how do you
like the flowers?
276
00:16:26,830 --> 00:16:27,950
- You're pretty
sweet, aren't you?
277
00:16:28,250 --> 00:16:29,330
- Well, I don't
know, I don't know.
278
00:16:30,420 --> 00:16:31,160
- I got you some pastries.
279
00:16:31,790 --> 00:16:32,210
- Oh, marvelous.
280
00:16:32,420 --> 00:16:33,000
- I hope you like them.
281
00:16:34,040 --> 00:16:34,790
- Everything's all right then?
282
00:16:35,550 --> 00:16:35,960
- Yeah, friends?
283
00:16:37,460 --> 00:16:37,800
- Yeah.
284
00:16:38,800 --> 00:16:39,260
(Jim laughs)
285
00:16:40,550 --> 00:16:41,130
Well, that's that then.
286
00:16:41,300 --> 00:16:42,760
We face the morning with
a smile on with the radio.
287
00:16:45,550 --> 00:16:46,720
Good morning, Francoise,
you French darling you?
288
00:16:49,730 --> 00:16:50,310
- Who's your friend?
289
00:16:50,470 --> 00:16:51,520
- My favorite female,
Francoise Fayol.
290
00:16:52,060 --> 00:16:53,140
- Oh, she must be
hard up for fans then.
291
00:16:54,520 --> 00:16:55,100
- Jealous, jealous.
292
00:16:56,230 --> 00:16:57,400
- Oh, so it's her
you're mad about?
293
00:16:58,810 --> 00:16:59,530
I thought it was B.B.
294
00:17:00,360 --> 00:17:01,110
- No, it's you I'm mad about.
295
00:17:02,150 --> 00:17:02,820
I'm mad about your mind.
296
00:17:03,320 --> 00:17:04,700
I lay awake at night
thinking about your mind.
297
00:17:06,530 --> 00:17:06,820
- I bet.
298
00:17:07,660 --> 00:17:08,410
- Jim, Jim, you're in the paper.
299
00:17:13,120 --> 00:17:13,620
- Oh!
300
00:17:37,890 --> 00:17:38,730
- I hope you like it.
301
00:17:39,150 --> 00:17:39,850
- How about that?
302
00:17:39,940 --> 00:17:40,770
Jim made the headlines.
303
00:17:41,190 --> 00:17:41,850
Any pictures?
304
00:17:42,150 --> 00:17:42,820
- Of Bridget?
305
00:17:42,940 --> 00:17:43,610
- Oh, no, of me.
306
00:17:43,860 --> 00:17:44,400
Where is it?
307
00:17:44,610 --> 00:17:45,190
- Here, right here.
308
00:17:45,360 --> 00:17:46,440
- Oh, yeah, what's
wrong with Gormleigh?
309
00:17:47,860 --> 00:17:48,990
Last night we interviewed
Mr. James Stevens,
310
00:17:49,860 --> 00:17:51,280
one of the council's new
frontier young executives,
311
00:17:56,290 --> 00:17:57,870
gave his ideas for the summer
campaign to attract visitors.
312
00:17:58,870 --> 00:17:59,750
High on the list was a visit
313
00:17:59,870 --> 00:18:01,080
of the famous French film
star, Bridget Bardot.
314
00:18:03,540 --> 00:18:04,130
Hey, you're talented.
315
00:18:04,670 --> 00:18:05,420
- You made me angry last night.
316
00:18:05,710 --> 00:18:06,880
- Mr. James Stevens,
young frontier executive.
317
00:18:09,420 --> 00:18:10,010
Yeah, I like that.
318
00:18:10,170 --> 00:18:11,550
- You won't when the
Mayor's through with you.
319
00:18:11,930 --> 00:18:12,590
- Why is that?
320
00:18:12,760 --> 00:18:13,880
- You work for the
council, don't you?
321
00:18:14,350 --> 00:18:14,850
- Yeah.
322
00:18:14,890 --> 00:18:15,890
- The Mayor doesn't like
his employees shooting
323
00:18:16,050 --> 00:18:16,890
their mouths off about anything.
324
00:18:17,770 --> 00:18:18,180
- I dare.
325
00:18:18,350 --> 00:18:19,350
- I wouldn't be
surprised if you're not
326
00:18:19,520 --> 00:18:20,890
an ex-council employee by
the time the morning's over.
327
00:18:22,100 --> 00:18:22,890
- Well, I don't care.
328
00:18:22,890 --> 00:18:23,850
I think it's a good idea.
329
00:18:23,940 --> 00:18:24,900
- Come on, he wants to see you.
330
00:18:25,400 --> 00:18:25,980
- I'm sorry, Jim.
331
00:18:26,900 --> 00:18:27,900
- Come on, I've
got another idea.
332
00:18:28,230 --> 00:18:28,900
- It's all my fault.
333
00:18:30,190 --> 00:18:30,940
- It won't work, you know?
334
00:18:31,490 --> 00:18:32,530
- You don't even
know Francoise Fayol.
335
00:18:33,200 --> 00:18:34,320
- Leave it to me, where
Jim goes there's news.
336
00:18:35,990 --> 00:18:36,830
Get up them stairs.
337
00:18:37,070 --> 00:18:37,740
(bright music)
338
00:18:59,930 --> 00:19:00,890
- Your worship, I got him, sir.
339
00:19:04,220 --> 00:19:05,690
He says he's very sorry
and it won't happen again.
340
00:19:08,560 --> 00:19:09,310
- Are you responsible for this?
341
00:19:09,690 --> 00:19:10,810
- Yes, and this
is my press agent.
342
00:19:12,190 --> 00:19:12,940
- Oh, how do you do?
343
00:19:13,150 --> 00:19:13,940
Now, look here man,
344
00:19:13,940 --> 00:19:14,980
my phone hasn't stopped
ringing all morning.
345
00:19:15,940 --> 00:19:17,070
People wanting to know
when Bardot is arriving,
346
00:19:18,530 --> 00:19:19,700
I haven't been able to
get on with any work.
347
00:19:19,870 --> 00:19:20,990
- That must be most
frustrating for you, sir.
348
00:19:21,160 --> 00:19:22,620
- It is my duty to se that
these machines are suitable
349
00:19:23,660 --> 00:19:24,080
for our public.
350
00:19:24,450 --> 00:19:24,950
- Oh, yes, sir.
351
00:19:25,040 --> 00:19:25,950
- I will not have employees
352
00:19:25,950 --> 00:19:27,410
in the council making unauthorized
statements to the press.
353
00:19:27,580 --> 00:19:28,950
It always stirs up trouble
and upsets the smooth running
354
00:19:30,710 --> 00:19:31,460
of Gormleigh's administration.
355
00:19:32,130 --> 00:19:32,960
- Well, that's very good, sir.
356
00:19:33,080 --> 00:19:34,210
You see, Gormleigh is
like these machines.
357
00:19:35,960 --> 00:19:36,760
Who wants to see these?
358
00:19:36,920 --> 00:19:37,960
No, you know what
Gormleigh wants?
359
00:19:39,090 --> 00:19:39,760
Is more of this.
360
00:19:55,690 --> 00:19:56,980
You see, your worship,
if Gormleigh became known
361
00:19:58,980 --> 00:19:59,570
for this sort of thing,
362
00:19:59,980 --> 00:20:00,980
they'd come flocking in
like bees after honey.
363
00:20:03,490 --> 00:20:03,990
- Well, I--
364
00:20:04,990 --> 00:20:06,030
- A beach full of
heavenly bodies.
365
00:20:06,990 --> 00:20:08,370
- Don't be ridiculous
young man, Bridget Bardot--
366
00:20:10,620 --> 00:20:10,990
- Ah!
367
00:20:11,040 --> 00:20:12,120
I see you're a logical
man, your worship,
368
00:20:12,750 --> 00:20:13,870
but there's more than
one pebble on the beach.
369
00:20:14,960 --> 00:20:15,710
This is not B.B, this is F.F.
370
00:20:18,500 --> 00:20:19,000
- F.F?
371
00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:20,050
- Francoise Fayol, the
toast of Le Touquet.
372
00:20:27,430 --> 00:20:28,550
Francoise Fayol in
Pavements of Paris.
373
00:20:31,770 --> 00:20:32,890
Francoise Fayol in
Pavements of Marseilles.
374
00:20:34,600 --> 00:20:35,730
Francoise Fayol in
Pavements of Dieppe.
375
00:20:38,520 --> 00:20:39,020
Not bad?
376
00:20:39,810 --> 00:20:40,650
- How soon can you get her here?
377
00:20:40,810 --> 00:20:41,940
- You just leave that
to me, your worship?
378
00:20:42,020 --> 00:20:43,320
She's just finished making
Pavements of Boulogne
379
00:20:44,230 --> 00:20:45,280
and she's in Le Touquet
for the premiere.
380
00:20:46,490 --> 00:20:47,990
Look at this, to Jim, (speaks
foreign language), Francoise.
381
00:20:54,030 --> 00:20:55,040
You know what that
means, don't you?
382
00:20:58,040 --> 00:20:59,210
- I don't recall
your position in--
383
00:21:00,080 --> 00:21:01,040
- Deck chair attendant, sir.
384
00:21:01,580 --> 00:21:02,380
Just started this season.
385
00:21:10,470 --> 00:21:11,090
- Deck chair attendant?
386
00:21:13,050 --> 00:21:14,600
And you come in here, you
were thinking of inviting
387
00:21:17,220 --> 00:21:18,060
this interesting young lady?
388
00:21:19,310 --> 00:21:20,810
- Well, she'll be coming to
the film festival, of course.
389
00:21:23,060 --> 00:21:23,480
- Film festival?
390
00:21:23,650 --> 00:21:24,690
- Yes, the Gormleigh
Film Festival.
391
00:21:26,060 --> 00:21:26,940
Yeah, sounds good, doesn't it?
392
00:21:27,280 --> 00:21:28,360
- Film festivals
cost a lot of money.
393
00:21:29,070 --> 00:21:30,110
- I don't think I
can get Francoise
394
00:21:31,070 --> 00:21:31,860
to come without a film festival.
395
00:21:32,070 --> 00:21:33,070
- I think you're wasting
my time young man.
396
00:21:34,070 --> 00:21:35,070
I don't believe you
know Francoise Fayol.
397
00:21:36,660 --> 00:21:37,080
- Know her?
398
00:21:39,370 --> 00:21:40,120
All I have to do is whistle.
399
00:21:40,500 --> 00:21:41,870
- All right, deck chair
attendant, you whistle her up
400
00:21:44,500 --> 00:21:45,250
and we'll have a film festival.
401
00:21:46,210 --> 00:21:47,080
- Have you got that down?
402
00:21:47,460 --> 00:21:48,080
- Naturally.
403
00:21:48,080 --> 00:21:49,050
- I may quote you, of course.
404
00:21:49,920 --> 00:21:50,170
- What?
405
00:21:50,340 --> 00:21:51,760
- The Mayor agrees that
the Gormleigh Film Festival
406
00:21:51,920 --> 00:21:53,050
is to be attended
by Francoise Fayol,
407
00:21:55,260 --> 00:21:56,090
the sex bomb of the new wave.
408
00:21:56,840 --> 00:21:57,600
- It'll run in the next edition.
409
00:21:59,260 --> 00:22:00,100
(telephone rings)
410
00:22:01,100 --> 00:22:01,890
- Excuse me, Mayor's office.
411
00:22:03,560 --> 00:22:04,100
- Excuse me.
412
00:22:04,270 --> 00:22:05,100
- When's who arriving?
413
00:22:06,100 --> 00:22:06,900
- Excuse me, hello.
414
00:22:08,440 --> 00:22:09,650
No, no, no, no, no,
I've been misquoted.
415
00:22:11,440 --> 00:22:12,110
No, no, no, no, not B.B.
416
00:22:13,740 --> 00:22:14,530
No, F.F, Francoise Fayol.
417
00:22:18,740 --> 00:22:19,870
Oh, yes, yes, she's
kindly consented
418
00:22:20,280 --> 00:22:21,280
to open the Gormleigh
Film Festival
419
00:22:23,120 --> 00:22:24,540
James Stevens, a publicity
officer to the film festival.
420
00:22:29,540 --> 00:22:30,790
Yes, yes, yes, you
can quote me, yes.
421
00:22:31,840 --> 00:22:32,130
Bye.
422
00:22:34,800 --> 00:22:35,210
Daily Mirror.
423
00:22:38,340 --> 00:22:39,470
- Good Lord, do you
know what you've done?
424
00:22:40,050 --> 00:22:41,220
- Make it started already,
nationwide publicity.
425
00:22:50,140 --> 00:22:51,650
Don't worry, your worship,
you attend to the details
426
00:22:53,270 --> 00:22:54,150
and I'll supply your star.
427
00:22:55,230 --> 00:22:56,650
- You'd better deliver young
man or you'll never work again,
428
00:22:59,490 --> 00:23:00,150
any of you.
429
00:23:03,950 --> 00:23:04,370
- Good morning.
430
00:23:08,160 --> 00:23:08,740
(trumpet music)
431
00:23:19,170 --> 00:23:19,840
(Guitar music)
432
00:23:21,710 --> 00:23:22,300
- Got the tickets?
433
00:23:22,670 --> 00:23:23,260
- You've got them,
434
00:23:23,420 --> 00:23:24,590
I used to know a bird
like this, all mouth.
435
00:23:25,590 --> 00:23:26,180
Hey, don't lose them.
436
00:23:27,510 --> 00:23:28,260
- Well, I'm not likely to, am I?
437
00:23:29,180 --> 00:23:29,850
- Yes, you are.
438
00:23:30,010 --> 00:23:30,770
- Two days trip to Boulogne.
439
00:23:31,180 --> 00:23:32,020
I've only got 13 and six left.
440
00:23:32,220 --> 00:23:33,230
- Not exactly
Rockefeller, are you?
441
00:23:33,430 --> 00:23:34,770
- It's not exactly the
beginning of the month, is it?
442
00:23:35,560 --> 00:23:36,190
- Oh, stop bickering.
443
00:23:37,150 --> 00:23:37,900
- Why can't he be like me?
444
00:23:38,060 --> 00:23:39,270
Why can't he just say, yes
sir, no sir, I'm sorry, sir,
445
00:23:40,110 --> 00:23:40,860
I won't let it happen again.
446
00:23:41,020 --> 00:23:41,780
Why do you have to be inspired?
447
00:23:42,190 --> 00:23:42,940
- The place is buzzing boy,
448
00:23:43,110 --> 00:23:44,190
your phone's been
ringing all day.
449
00:23:44,610 --> 00:23:45,360
- Yeah, well, that's true.
450
00:23:46,200 --> 00:23:46,700
- What?
451
00:23:46,860 --> 00:23:48,070
Complaints?
- No, they're all excited
452
00:23:48,200 --> 00:23:48,660
about it.
453
00:23:48,820 --> 00:23:49,990
- Well, I feel like
I'm being deported.
454
00:23:50,240 --> 00:23:51,200
- The trouble with you, Henry,
455
00:23:51,200 --> 00:23:52,330
is you don't think
positively enough.
456
00:23:52,490 --> 00:23:53,910
The power up positive
thought is what is needed.
457
00:23:55,120 --> 00:23:55,870
- I've got a positive thought.
458
00:23:56,200 --> 00:23:56,750
- What's that?
459
00:23:56,910 --> 00:23:58,210
- What if F.F doesn't
want to come to Gormleigh?
460
00:23:58,250 --> 00:23:59,710
- What do you think I've got
all this gear on for boy?
461
00:24:00,040 --> 00:24:00,790
She won't be able to resist me?
462
00:24:01,130 --> 00:24:02,210
- Oh, get a load
of prince charming.
463
00:24:02,290 --> 00:24:03,710
- Anyway, she's a film star,
she needs the publicity.
464
00:24:04,500 --> 00:24:05,630
- Yeah, why don't we
just phone her up?
465
00:24:09,760 --> 00:24:10,800
- Leave a light
burning in the window,
466
00:24:12,220 --> 00:24:12,930
don't pine for me love.
467
00:24:13,100 --> 00:24:14,220
- Oh, I think I
can last one day.
468
00:24:18,520 --> 00:24:19,310
- I should go away more often.
469
00:24:19,730 --> 00:24:20,850
- Hurry up, you'll
miss the pier.
470
00:24:34,120 --> 00:24:36,740
♪ Pretty little turtle dove ♪
471
00:24:36,740 --> 00:24:37,370
♪ Sitting on a vine ♪
472
00:24:39,240 --> 00:24:40,250
♪ Longing for her ♪
own true love ♪
473
00:24:42,210 --> 00:24:43,250
♪ As I do now for ♪
mine, for mine ♪
474
00:24:45,590 --> 00:24:46,250
♪ As I do now for mine ♪
475
00:24:48,630 --> 00:24:49,760
♪ Up on the mountain ♪
the other day ♪
476
00:24:51,840 --> 00:24:52,630
♪ A pretty little flower grew ♪
477
00:24:54,380 --> 00:24:55,590
♪ Never did I know ♪
till the other day ♪
478
00:24:57,300 --> 00:24:58,560
♪ What love oh love, ♪
could do, could do ♪
479
00:25:00,510 --> 00:25:05,270
♪ What love oh love could do ♪
480
00:25:05,270 --> 00:25:05,900
♪ If I had a lazy man ♪
481
00:25:07,440 --> 00:25:08,610
♪ I'd scold him sure ♪
as you're born ♪
482
00:25:10,270 --> 00:25:11,320
♪ I'd take him down ♪
to New Orleans ♪
483
00:25:13,320 --> 00:25:14,440
♪ Trade him off for ♪
corn, for corn ♪
484
00:25:16,450 --> 00:25:20,030
♪ And trade him off for corn ♪
485
00:25:20,030 --> 00:25:23,660
♪ But I'm a poor country girl ♪
486
00:25:23,660 --> 00:25:24,290
♪ Money I have none ♪
487
00:25:26,920 --> 00:25:27,960
♪ But there's a ♪
silver in the stars ♪
488
00:25:30,000 --> 00:25:31,210
♪ And gold in the ♪
morning sun, sun ♪
489
00:25:34,760 --> 00:25:35,550
♪ And gold in the morning sun ♪
490
00:25:46,100 --> 00:25:46,850
(speaking in foreign language)
491
00:25:59,740 --> 00:26:00,320
- Le Touquet.
492
00:26:01,570 --> 00:26:02,240
- Le Touquet.
493
00:26:02,450 --> 00:26:03,320
(speaking in foreign language)
494
00:26:30,350 --> 00:26:31,100
- What did he say?
495
00:26:31,930 --> 00:26:32,350
- I don't know.
496
00:26:34,520 --> 00:26:35,350
(Speaking in foreign language)
497
00:26:39,900 --> 00:26:40,480
- Henry, I've found her.
498
00:26:41,820 --> 00:26:42,360
- You what?
499
00:26:47,660 --> 00:26:48,360
- Well, where is she?
500
00:26:50,910 --> 00:26:51,370
- Voila.
501
00:26:53,250 --> 00:26:54,330
Francoise Fayol,
"Rues de Boulogne."
502
00:26:58,920 --> 00:26:59,500
- That's a new film.
503
00:26:59,710 --> 00:27:00,460
- Yeah, bit pale, isn't she?
504
00:27:01,250 --> 00:27:02,460
- Yeah, she wants to get
out in the sun a bit more.
505
00:27:03,710 --> 00:27:04,380
Oh, how do you do?
506
00:27:04,590 --> 00:27:05,380
- Hello, darling.
507
00:27:06,090 --> 00:27:07,220
- There's another
one over there.
508
00:27:07,800 --> 00:27:08,300
- Where?
509
00:27:12,390 --> 00:27:13,060
- Hey, look!
510
00:27:13,220 --> 00:27:13,970
The Martians have landed.
511
00:27:15,270 --> 00:27:15,680
- Oh, no.
512
00:27:21,980 --> 00:27:22,730
- Thousands of them, look.
513
00:27:24,770 --> 00:27:25,570
(both laughing)
(bright music)
514
00:28:08,610 --> 00:28:09,780
- Hey, what a pity
they're not real.
515
00:28:10,320 --> 00:28:11,440
- Yeah, they're like
me, soft and cuddly.
516
00:28:14,440 --> 00:28:15,450
- Hey, look at that
car on the pavemement.
517
00:28:17,450 --> 00:28:18,450
- Maybe they're allowed to drive
518
00:28:18,450 --> 00:28:19,780
on the pavement in France.
- That's ridiculous, ain't it?
519
00:28:20,200 --> 00:28:20,620
- Just a minute.
520
00:28:20,910 --> 00:28:21,490
(car engine revs)
521
00:28:23,450 --> 00:28:24,160
- It's coming for us.
522
00:28:39,470 --> 00:28:39,930
Swine.
- Swine.
523
00:28:40,140 --> 00:28:40,720
Who did that then?
524
00:28:41,550 --> 00:28:42,220
Murderer, swine.
525
00:28:42,470 --> 00:28:43,600
- Who do you think
your trying to kill?
526
00:28:43,770 --> 00:28:44,520
- Who so you think you are?
527
00:28:48,020 --> 00:28:48,480
Hey, you, stop!
528
00:28:49,480 --> 00:28:49,770
Stop!
529
00:28:50,440 --> 00:28:51,020
You nearly killed us.
530
00:28:51,480 --> 00:28:52,320
I thought you were going to--
531
00:28:52,480 --> 00:28:53,110
- Hey, hey!
532
00:28:54,020 --> 00:28:54,610
(car engine revving)
533
00:29:01,320 --> 00:29:02,070
What do you think you're doing?
534
00:29:06,040 --> 00:29:06,620
- What's your game.
535
00:29:07,490 --> 00:29:08,500
(Francoise shouts
in foreign language)
536
00:29:10,000 --> 00:29:10,500
(all shouting)
537
00:29:13,170 --> 00:29:14,340
- That's her, that's
Francoise Fayol.
538
00:29:19,510 --> 00:29:20,300
- Hello, Miss Fayol.
539
00:29:20,510 --> 00:29:21,300
(speaks in foreign language)
540
00:29:21,510 --> 00:29:22,510
- Excuse us, my friend
didn't recognize you
541
00:29:28,430 --> 00:29:29,020
with your clothes on.
542
00:29:29,180 --> 00:29:30,270
- No, I didn't.
- What do you mean,
543
00:29:30,480 --> 00:29:31,060
didn't recognize me
544
00:29:31,230 --> 00:29:32,350
with my clothes on?
- What do you have
545
00:29:32,520 --> 00:29:33,520
to say that for?
- I'm a serious artist.
546
00:29:33,520 --> 00:29:34,560
- Yes, you are, exactly.
- Of course, you are.
547
00:29:34,730 --> 00:29:35,520
(speaks in foreign language)
548
00:29:35,650 --> 00:29:36,980
- My name is Jim Stevens,
I'm in publicity.
549
00:29:38,320 --> 00:29:39,520
Henry Liggett, Henry Liggett,
he's in entertainment.
550
00:29:42,530 --> 00:29:43,360
- Entertainment, yes.
551
00:29:43,780 --> 00:29:44,530
- Oh, no, no, no, no.
552
00:29:44,950 --> 00:29:45,700
How can anyone take me seriously
553
00:29:46,280 --> 00:29:47,410
when I'm floating around
the beach full of gas.
554
00:29:48,330 --> 00:29:49,530
- Exactly, now, I have a little
proposition to make to you.
555
00:29:52,790 --> 00:29:53,910
I'm a great admirer
of yours, Miss Fayol.
556
00:29:55,330 --> 00:29:56,540
I'll tell you what we do,
we'll do anything to help you.
557
00:29:57,420 --> 00:29:58,500
We'll knock all
these balloons down,
558
00:29:58,580 --> 00:29:59,540
we'll smash the beach
- Really,
559
00:29:59,670 --> 00:30:00,590
you will really help me?
- Yes, yes.
560
00:30:03,050 --> 00:30:04,010
- Good, come with me.
- Certainly.
561
00:30:33,330 --> 00:30:34,080
What do you want us to do?
562
00:30:34,870 --> 00:30:35,370
- Shhh!
563
00:30:42,670 --> 00:30:43,340
Burn them.
564
00:30:43,790 --> 00:30:44,580
- Have you got any matches?
565
00:30:46,590 --> 00:30:47,130
- Let's go.
566
00:31:11,070 --> 00:31:12,240
- You can hardly
see your way here
567
00:31:12,780 --> 00:31:13,610
with all these dummies around.
568
00:31:13,740 --> 00:31:14,610
- Now will you do it for me?
569
00:31:14,860 --> 00:31:15,410
- What?
570
00:31:15,570 --> 00:31:16,610
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Yes or no.
571
00:31:16,610 --> 00:31:17,450
- All right then.
572
00:31:17,620 --> 00:31:18,410
- All right, let's do it.
573
00:31:18,580 --> 00:31:19,370
- Yeah, oops, hang on, oops.
574
00:31:22,200 --> 00:31:22,790
(bright upbeat music)
575
00:32:20,010 --> 00:32:20,800
(singing in foreign language)
576
00:32:28,770 --> 00:32:29,930
(Vladek speaks in
foreign language)
577
00:32:31,690 --> 00:32:32,810
- May I introduce,
this is Vladek,
578
00:32:33,850 --> 00:32:34,690
my fiance, the famous producer.
579
00:32:35,440 --> 00:32:36,610
(Vladek speaks in
foreign language)
580
00:32:36,690 --> 00:32:37,690
- [Henry] Hello, very
nice to meet you.
581
00:32:37,940 --> 00:32:39,110
- That's the end of your
stupid publicity stunt.
582
00:32:40,740 --> 00:32:41,400
- Are you mad?
583
00:32:41,820 --> 00:32:42,660
These things cost money.
584
00:32:43,450 --> 00:32:44,200
- Well, it's stupid idea.
585
00:32:45,160 --> 00:32:45,700
- Stupid?
586
00:32:45,740 --> 00:32:46,820
This is the best
publicity you've had
587
00:32:47,530 --> 00:32:48,290
for any of your pictures.
588
00:32:49,040 --> 00:32:49,790
- Cheap publicity, cheap.
589
00:32:50,910 --> 00:32:51,410
- Cheap?
590
00:32:51,750 --> 00:32:52,700
You don't realize the money
591
00:32:52,830 --> 00:32:53,960
and my precious time
I've spent on you.
592
00:32:54,710 --> 00:32:55,830
(Francoise speaks
in foreign language)
593
00:32:56,880 --> 00:32:57,710
- You are responsible for this,
594
00:32:58,710 --> 00:32:59,710
I'm going to call the
police, criminals.
595
00:33:01,920 --> 00:33:03,050
- Miss Fayol asked
us to burn them,
596
00:33:03,920 --> 00:33:04,880
anyway, it's
ridiculous publicity.
597
00:33:06,390 --> 00:33:07,140
- She's a serious artist.
598
00:33:07,970 --> 00:33:08,640
- Serious?
599
00:33:08,720 --> 00:33:09,850
Without me she'd
still be modeling.
600
00:33:10,810 --> 00:33:12,020
- Oh, I did it only for
paying my drama studies.
601
00:33:14,180 --> 00:33:14,720
- Drama?
602
00:33:15,730 --> 00:33:16,690
- She's developed since then.
603
00:33:17,560 --> 00:33:18,730
- Yes, she's very
well developed.
604
00:33:19,650 --> 00:33:20,730
That's why I can get
money for her pictures.
605
00:33:21,360 --> 00:33:22,730
- Oh, in your film all I have
to do is take off the clothes.
606
00:33:24,730 --> 00:33:26,030
Why can't you make a picture
where I can act with my mind
607
00:33:27,740 --> 00:33:28,570
instead of my body?
608
00:33:28,740 --> 00:33:29,870
- How I'm going to sell a
picture about your mind, idiot?
609
00:33:32,490 --> 00:33:33,240
(speaks in foreign language)
610
00:33:33,790 --> 00:33:34,450
- Cherie.
611
00:33:34,620 --> 00:33:35,700
- Oh no, you don't
understand me.
612
00:33:36,500 --> 00:33:37,250
- Please, we are going to Rome.
613
00:33:38,120 --> 00:33:39,210
I have a wonderful
story for you.
614
00:33:39,500 --> 00:33:40,750
- Oh, yes, so I have to take
off my clothes in Italian.
615
00:33:43,750 --> 00:33:44,250
- Please.
616
00:33:44,420 --> 00:33:45,550
- Oh, don't start
that all over again.
617
00:33:45,710 --> 00:33:46,920
No, I'm not going to Rome,
I'm not going anywhere.
618
00:33:50,180 --> 00:33:50,930
- All right, do as you like.
619
00:33:55,760 --> 00:33:57,180
- And I don't want to see
you again until you find me
620
00:33:58,390 --> 00:33:59,140
a film worthy of my talent.
621
00:34:00,100 --> 00:34:01,270
- Your talent is worth
nothing without mine.
622
00:34:03,900 --> 00:34:04,770
(shouts in foreign language)
623
00:34:10,780 --> 00:34:12,200
- Don't worry, come to our
place and have a cup of tea.
624
00:34:17,160 --> 00:34:17,780
- All right.
625
00:34:21,290 --> 00:34:21,790
(trumpet music)
626
00:34:33,800 --> 00:34:34,800
- Right gentlemen,
chests out, stomachs in,
627
00:34:37,390 --> 00:34:37,970
do Gormleigh proud.
628
00:34:38,800 --> 00:34:39,800
We want a little more fortissimo
629
00:34:39,800 --> 00:34:41,180
and a little less pianissimo
for our distinguished visitor.
630
00:34:44,810 --> 00:34:45,310
About turn!
631
00:35:21,180 --> 00:35:22,220
- Look, they're
round the other side.
632
00:35:22,760 --> 00:35:23,510
All down, we're coming around.
633
00:35:26,810 --> 00:35:27,390
We're coming around.
634
00:35:29,350 --> 00:35:30,100
- Over there, over there.
635
00:35:46,700 --> 00:35:47,290
- Where are they going?
636
00:35:47,490 --> 00:35:48,080
Come on, come on!
637
00:35:54,870 --> 00:35:55,460
Here we are, Gormleigh.
638
00:35:56,880 --> 00:35:57,420
- Unbelievable.
639
00:35:57,590 --> 00:35:58,800
- May I present,
Mademoiselle Francoise Fayol.
640
00:36:02,010 --> 00:36:02,840
(audience shouting)
641
00:36:08,390 --> 00:36:08,890
- One more.
642
00:36:14,140 --> 00:36:15,480
- Mademoiselle, I
welcome you to Gormleigh.
643
00:36:19,650 --> 00:36:20,400
(Jim speaks in foreign language)
644
00:36:20,900 --> 00:36:21,900
- Yes, yes (speaks
in foreign language).
645
00:36:25,990 --> 00:36:26,820
Nice to have you here.
646
00:36:27,820 --> 00:36:28,410
- So you are a Mayor?
647
00:36:28,910 --> 00:36:29,990
I'm looking forward to
find out all about you.
648
00:36:31,910 --> 00:36:32,580
- Mutual.
649
00:36:32,910 --> 00:36:33,580
- Marvelous reception,
650
00:36:33,910 --> 00:36:34,830
your worship.
- Excuse me.
651
00:36:34,910 --> 00:36:36,160
I will take over now, very
good job, Mr. Liggett.
652
00:36:37,210 --> 00:36:38,290
- Thank you, thank
you very much.
653
00:36:38,920 --> 00:36:39,920
- Not at all, you can
take the second chair.
654
00:36:55,810 --> 00:36:56,930
- What am I gonna
do with this lot?
655
00:36:57,930 --> 00:36:58,730
- I'll give you two guesses.
656
00:37:01,940 --> 00:37:03,310
- Must look after you now
that you're in our hands,
657
00:37:07,280 --> 00:37:07,940
so to speak.
658
00:37:08,650 --> 00:37:09,700
The old people of
Gormleigh have given up
659
00:37:09,860 --> 00:37:11,030
their afternoon spin so
that you may be driven down
660
00:37:11,990 --> 00:37:13,370
the longest piers in
Britain, if not the world.
661
00:37:21,250 --> 00:37:21,750
Forward!
662
00:37:21,920 --> 00:37:22,500
(instrumental music)
663
00:37:52,980 --> 00:37:54,030
It now gives me great
pleasure to present
664
00:37:54,700 --> 00:37:55,990
to you the symbolic key
which makes you a free man
665
00:38:05,410 --> 00:38:06,160
in the town of Gormleigh.
666
00:38:07,040 --> 00:38:08,120
it is also the
key to our hearts.
667
00:38:10,380 --> 00:38:11,130
(speaks in foreign language)
668
00:38:17,220 --> 00:38:17,720
You too.
669
00:38:17,930 --> 00:38:18,510
(audience clapping)
670
00:38:21,430 --> 00:38:22,970
We now invite you to take
the salute at our precession
671
00:38:24,220 --> 00:38:25,720
which is designed to cement
Anglo-French relationships.
672
00:38:29,020 --> 00:38:30,020
Right, let the
precession commence.
673
00:38:38,530 --> 00:38:39,280
- Horace, the first float!
674
00:38:49,370 --> 00:38:50,040
- William the Conqueror
675
00:38:50,120 --> 00:38:51,250
and Harold at the
Battle of Hastings,
676
00:38:52,460 --> 00:38:53,210
England and France get together.
677
00:38:56,040 --> 00:38:57,380
So you see that you're not
the first native of France
678
00:38:58,510 --> 00:38:59,050
to conquer us?
679
00:39:05,050 --> 00:39:06,260
A great French invention,
Madam Le Guillotine.
680
00:39:16,190 --> 00:39:17,310
I did the working
drawings myself.
681
00:39:18,650 --> 00:39:19,400
I'm a bit mechanically bent.
682
00:39:22,440 --> 00:39:22,950
- Oh!
683
00:39:29,070 --> 00:39:29,660
- Fascinating toy.
684
00:39:30,740 --> 00:39:31,160
- Oh, yes.
685
00:39:35,830 --> 00:39:37,080
- The French Arts, all local
talent are selected by myself.
686
00:39:46,970 --> 00:39:48,090
That one minus the
ear is Van Gogh.
687
00:39:50,090 --> 00:39:50,680
He cut it off.
688
00:39:50,850 --> 00:39:52,350
They're a funny lot these
foreigners, I do beg your pardon.
689
00:39:53,640 --> 00:39:54,810
Mr. Shorthouse is
Toulouse Lautrec.
690
00:40:01,980 --> 00:40:03,070
And now a tribute from
the British Legion
691
00:40:05,110 --> 00:40:05,820
to the Foreign Legion.
692
00:40:18,160 --> 00:40:19,120
- Sir, there's been a delay.
693
00:40:20,540 --> 00:40:21,920
Napoleon and Josephine, they're
jammed around the corner.
694
00:40:24,790 --> 00:40:25,380
(audience applausing)
695
00:40:55,150 --> 00:40:55,820
Where's he gone now?
696
00:40:56,370 --> 00:40:57,490
Blimey, he hasn't
seen the other things.
697
00:40:58,160 --> 00:40:59,200
We haven't finished
yet, come back!
698
00:41:02,700 --> 00:41:03,330
- [Mayor] Abandon ship.
699
00:41:05,960 --> 00:41:06,580
- [Announcer] England.
700
00:41:07,170 --> 00:41:08,090
♪ Rule Brittania ♪
701
00:41:10,170 --> 00:41:10,840
- Come on, come on.
702
00:41:11,000 --> 00:41:11,840
♪ Brittania rule the waves ♪
703
00:41:12,170 --> 00:41:13,170
It's all right,
they're coming back.
704
00:41:14,800 --> 00:41:16,090
♪ Britains never, never, ♪
never, shall be slaves ♪
705
00:41:23,470 --> 00:41:27,180
♪ Rule Brittania ♪
706
00:41:27,180 --> 00:41:28,060
♪ Brittania rule the waves ♪
707
00:41:31,560 --> 00:41:32,820
♪ Britains never, never, ♪
never, shall be slaves ♪
708
00:41:43,030 --> 00:41:43,620
(Francoise coughs)
709
00:41:44,120 --> 00:41:44,870
- I might have been drowned.
710
00:41:45,160 --> 00:41:46,200
- Oh, no, you were
all right close to me.
711
00:41:47,410 --> 00:41:48,200
I've a medal for life saving.
712
00:41:50,210 --> 00:41:50,830
- It's all right, sir.
713
00:41:51,000 --> 00:41:52,170
Napoleon and Josephine,
I told them to hang on.
714
00:41:55,500 --> 00:41:56,630
- I swallowed half
of your stupid sea.
715
00:41:58,920 --> 00:41:59,340
- Get a move on.
716
00:41:59,510 --> 00:42:00,630
Come on, don't keep
the Mayor waiting.
717
00:42:03,050 --> 00:42:03,680
- Oh, there, there.
718
00:42:04,140 --> 00:42:04,930
Just a little contretemps.
719
00:42:05,100 --> 00:42:06,350
We'll have you out of these
damp clothes in a minute.
720
00:42:07,220 --> 00:42:08,180
- Oh, I'm cold and shivering.
721
00:42:08,980 --> 00:42:09,430
- Now, now.
722
00:42:09,600 --> 00:42:10,680
- Sir, what about
Napoleon and Josephine?
723
00:42:10,890 --> 00:42:11,690
- Will get the limousine?
724
00:42:13,230 --> 00:42:14,230
- Get me out of here
before I scream.
725
00:42:14,560 --> 00:42:16,060
- We'll soon have you in
the Sarah Bernhardt room.
726
00:42:16,770 --> 00:42:18,230
Just a... see, we'll have
you home and dry in a jiffy.
727
00:42:21,700 --> 00:42:22,240
(rain pouring)
728
00:42:34,330 --> 00:42:35,170
(instrumental music)
729
00:42:50,550 --> 00:42:51,560
- It's just a
passing shower, miss.
730
00:42:56,270 --> 00:42:56,890
Excuse me, oops!
731
00:43:18,960 --> 00:43:20,040
Remember Sir Walter
Raleigh, sir?
732
00:43:21,290 --> 00:43:21,750
- Who?
733
00:43:22,130 --> 00:43:22,540
- Raleigh.
734
00:43:22,710 --> 00:43:23,670
- Yeah, here you are.
- Thank you.
735
00:43:37,560 --> 00:43:38,930
(Francoise screams and
speaks in foreign language)
736
00:43:54,030 --> 00:43:55,120
- If I wanted to, I
could conquer the world.
737
00:43:56,320 --> 00:43:57,370
- It hasn't exactly got
you anywhere, has it?
738
00:43:58,330 --> 00:43:59,290
- Well, I got F.F, didn't I?
739
00:43:59,330 --> 00:44:00,660
- You mean it's got you
back to your deck chairs.
740
00:44:01,660 --> 00:44:02,790
- Henry and the Mayor
couldn't do what I did.
741
00:44:03,790 --> 00:44:05,170
- I suppose you think
you're the one conquer her.
742
00:44:06,130 --> 00:44:07,330
- Well, I have a certain
(speaks in foreign language).
743
00:44:08,380 --> 00:44:08,880
- Oh.
744
00:44:09,170 --> 00:44:09,750
- [Mayor] Stevens!
745
00:44:10,130 --> 00:44:10,550
- [Henry] Jim!
746
00:44:10,750 --> 00:44:11,340
- [Mayor] Stevens!
747
00:44:11,670 --> 00:44:12,420
- Oh, we're being followed.
748
00:44:13,800 --> 00:44:14,300
- Yeah.
749
00:44:14,340 --> 00:44:15,340
- Quick, quick,
come to the hotel.
750
00:44:16,340 --> 00:44:17,010
- What for?
751
00:44:17,180 --> 00:44:17,970
- She's so temperamental.
752
00:44:18,720 --> 00:44:19,260
- Who?
753
00:44:19,340 --> 00:44:20,640
- F.F, I'm afraid she
might do something silly.
754
00:44:21,850 --> 00:44:22,600
If she left now, the publicity.
755
00:44:23,810 --> 00:44:25,100
- Yes, be rather
embarrassing, wouldn't it?
756
00:44:26,350 --> 00:44:27,060
- She became violent.
757
00:44:27,230 --> 00:44:28,310
She threw mud in
his worship's face.
758
00:44:29,150 --> 00:44:30,230
- She says she wants
to speak to you.
759
00:44:30,900 --> 00:44:31,480
- I don't know why.
760
00:44:32,190 --> 00:44:32,780
- Yeah, well, I do.
761
00:44:32,940 --> 00:44:33,940
We have certain
understanding, you know?
762
00:44:34,360 --> 00:44:35,190
- Look, never mind the chairs.
763
00:44:35,700 --> 00:44:36,440
She might be packing now.
764
00:44:37,280 --> 00:44:38,030
- Yeah, or talking to reporters.
765
00:44:38,490 --> 00:44:39,610
- Yeah, look, Stevens,
you go talk to her.
766
00:44:41,080 --> 00:44:41,660
- Well, all right.
767
00:44:41,830 --> 00:44:43,290
As I'm publicity officer for
the rest of the festival.
768
00:44:45,250 --> 00:44:45,500
- Right.
769
00:44:45,660 --> 00:44:47,120
- With unlimited powers
to carry out the publicity
770
00:44:48,160 --> 00:44:48,750
the way that I want to.
771
00:44:49,420 --> 00:44:49,920
- Right.
772
00:44:50,920 --> 00:44:51,670
- I ought to see what I can do.
773
00:44:52,920 --> 00:44:53,380
- Right.
774
00:44:53,380 --> 00:44:54,750
- Yeah, well, I will just
get these chairs away.
775
00:44:55,670 --> 00:44:56,800
- Hey, hey, never
mind the chairs.
776
00:44:58,630 --> 00:44:59,300
- Oh, right.
777
00:45:01,470 --> 00:45:02,300
- Yeah, we'll do 'em.
778
00:45:03,390 --> 00:45:03,970
- No, you'll do 'em.
779
00:45:07,430 --> 00:45:07,930
- Hello.
780
00:45:08,100 --> 00:45:09,100
- [Jim] Festival
publicity officer here.
781
00:45:10,560 --> 00:45:11,390
- Oh, Jim, it's you.
782
00:45:12,100 --> 00:45:12,690
- [Jim] Yeah, it's me.
783
00:45:12,850 --> 00:45:13,610
I bet you didn't miss me,
784
00:45:13,770 --> 00:45:14,770
I bet there's
somebody else already.
785
00:45:15,480 --> 00:45:15,980
- Never.
786
00:45:16,360 --> 00:45:16,770
- [Jim] Yeah?
787
00:45:16,940 --> 00:45:17,980
- Well, actually,
there is somebody else.
788
00:45:20,190 --> 00:45:20,610
- Who is that?
789
00:45:20,950 --> 00:45:21,400
I'll do him.
790
00:45:21,530 --> 00:45:22,950
- [Francoise] His worship,
the Mayor, of course.
791
00:45:24,410 --> 00:45:25,870
- It's about time somebody put
him in his place, the old--
792
00:45:27,410 --> 00:45:27,910
- Goat.
793
00:45:28,290 --> 00:45:28,700
- [Jim] Yeah.
794
00:45:28,910 --> 00:45:29,490
- A pompous old goat.
795
00:45:29,660 --> 00:45:30,750
- [Jim] That's the word
we're searching for.
796
00:45:30,910 --> 00:45:32,040
Look, look, it's about
time he was brought down
797
00:45:32,750 --> 00:45:33,410
a peg or two.
798
00:45:33,830 --> 00:45:34,420
Will you help me?
799
00:45:34,580 --> 00:45:35,420
- Oh, it will be a pleasure.
800
00:45:35,500 --> 00:45:36,960
- I've got great idea for
a little publicity party
801
00:45:38,300 --> 00:45:38,880
on the beach tomorrow.
802
00:45:39,460 --> 00:45:40,880
Can I come up and discuss
it with you privately?
803
00:45:43,420 --> 00:45:44,420
I'm coming, I'm
outside your door.
804
00:45:45,090 --> 00:45:46,180
(Francoise laughs)
(door knocks)
805
00:45:48,100 --> 00:45:48,510
(mood music)
806
00:46:20,580 --> 00:46:22,090
Good morning, good morning,
good morning, good morning.
807
00:46:23,420 --> 00:46:24,170
Still churning it out, I see.
808
00:46:24,460 --> 00:46:25,260
- What does it look like?
809
00:46:25,960 --> 00:46:27,380
- All good stuff, nothing
too near the knuckle.
810
00:46:30,430 --> 00:46:31,680
- I'm writing a novel, not a
bedtime story for children.
811
00:46:34,510 --> 00:46:35,600
Hope you enjoyed
yourself last night.
812
00:46:36,770 --> 00:46:37,470
- What, with Francoise?
813
00:46:38,100 --> 00:46:38,680
Well, I had to spend
814
00:46:38,850 --> 00:46:39,890
the whole evening
persuading her to stay.
815
00:46:40,060 --> 00:46:40,810
I had to use all my charm.
816
00:46:41,480 --> 00:46:42,440
- Ooh, what a schmoo.
- Jim.
817
00:46:44,980 --> 00:46:45,570
- Excuse me, duty calls.
818
00:46:46,690 --> 00:46:47,360
See you later.
819
00:46:47,860 --> 00:46:48,900
(speaks foreign
language) one and all,
820
00:46:49,820 --> 00:46:50,820
and a (speaks in
foreign language) it is.
821
00:46:53,320 --> 00:46:53,740
There it is.
822
00:46:54,740 --> 00:46:56,200
That's the shot that we
want, pier in the background.
823
00:46:58,740 --> 00:47:00,000
The Mayor and civic dignitaries
join Francoise Fayol
824
00:47:02,670 --> 00:47:03,500
in the delights of Gormleigh.
825
00:47:05,500 --> 00:47:06,090
Right, gentlemen.
826
00:47:07,210 --> 00:47:07,790
Shoes and socks off.
827
00:47:10,500 --> 00:47:11,090
Paddling.
828
00:47:12,510 --> 00:47:13,220
- Oh, I hardly think.
829
00:47:13,510 --> 00:47:14,090
- I thought we decided
830
00:47:14,260 --> 00:47:15,510
to create a new gay carefree
image for Gormleigh.
831
00:47:18,550 --> 00:47:19,060
- Yes.
832
00:47:19,220 --> 00:47:20,510
- Well, the publicity
officer strongly advises you
833
00:47:20,680 --> 00:47:21,510
to take off your shoes and socks
834
00:47:22,350 --> 00:47:23,480
and show him your
itsy pink tootsies.
835
00:47:25,310 --> 00:47:25,890
- I don't think--
836
00:47:26,060 --> 00:47:27,150
- You will take off your
shoes and stockings,
837
00:47:28,480 --> 00:47:28,900
and I will too.
838
00:47:33,360 --> 00:47:33,940
(councilors groaning)
839
00:47:35,110 --> 00:47:36,280
- Come on, tootsies in
the briny, Mr Liggett.
840
00:47:38,160 --> 00:47:38,740
- Tootsies in the briny,
841
00:47:38,990 --> 00:47:39,990
I'll give you
tootsies in the briny.
842
00:47:40,160 --> 00:47:41,330
- Yeah, boys, get
ready to take one
843
00:47:41,490 --> 00:47:42,530
of the greatest
picture of the year.
844
00:47:43,750 --> 00:47:45,200
Smile, gentlemen, you're
doing this for Gormleigh.
845
00:47:48,830 --> 00:47:49,540
(camera shutters)
846
00:48:28,160 --> 00:48:28,910
- Oh, Jim, you great fool.
847
00:48:30,250 --> 00:48:30,830
We are all soaked.
848
00:48:31,040 --> 00:48:32,120
- We've got some
marvelous pictures.
849
00:48:33,290 --> 00:48:33,880
- I'm very pleased,
850
00:48:34,040 --> 00:48:35,210
perhaps I may now return
to more prosaic duties.
851
00:48:36,750 --> 00:48:38,340
- But darling, I haven't
christened my new bathing costume.
852
00:48:40,340 --> 00:48:41,590
It would be so nice,
would it not Mr. Stevens?
853
00:48:42,550 --> 00:48:43,760
If you had some photos in
bathing costumes, all of us.
854
00:48:46,220 --> 00:48:46,800
I'm dying to try it on.
855
00:48:47,600 --> 00:48:48,760
- Well, if it's going
to help the new image.
856
00:48:49,560 --> 00:48:50,680
- Oh, it would, it would,
it would, Mr. Mayor.
857
00:48:51,600 --> 00:48:52,350
What a marvelous idea?
858
00:48:52,770 --> 00:48:53,600
Everybody into bathing costumes.
859
00:48:55,770 --> 00:48:56,600
- Oh goody, goody.
860
00:48:57,360 --> 00:48:58,400
- I will be out of
this dress in a second.
861
00:49:08,990 --> 00:49:10,120
- First places,
please gentlemen.
862
00:49:12,790 --> 00:49:14,000
Grace and movement, on
the ball, fairy dancing.
863
00:49:18,500 --> 00:49:19,080
Ready, steady, go.
864
00:49:22,630 --> 00:49:23,380
There we are, gentlemen.
865
00:49:23,630 --> 00:49:24,420
Frolic like little lambs.
866
00:49:31,470 --> 00:49:32,220
Right boys, immortalize that.
867
00:50:12,510 --> 00:50:12,930
(Jim yawns)
868
00:50:25,190 --> 00:50:25,940
(speaks in foreign language)
869
00:51:12,150 --> 00:51:12,730
Thanks, fellows.
870
00:51:12,940 --> 00:51:13,650
Fabulous!
871
00:51:13,730 --> 00:51:14,610
See you at the film festival.
872
00:51:15,690 --> 00:51:16,320
See you later, Judy.
873
00:51:19,070 --> 00:51:20,280
That went great darling,
and you were marvelous.
874
00:51:20,860 --> 00:51:21,990
Hey, we've got some
fabulous pictures.
875
00:51:22,780 --> 00:51:23,870
The Mayor will never
live this down.
876
00:51:24,450 --> 00:51:25,200
Blimey, I bet labor gets in.
877
00:51:31,750 --> 00:51:32,330
What's needling you?
878
00:51:32,790 --> 00:51:33,460
- Nothing.
879
00:51:34,250 --> 00:51:35,710
Looks as though you've
find your vocation at last.
880
00:51:36,750 --> 00:51:37,210
- What?
881
00:51:37,380 --> 00:51:38,750
- Organizing pin-ups instead
of just drooling over them.
882
00:51:40,090 --> 00:51:40,840
- Well, it's progress, isn't it?
883
00:51:41,760 --> 00:51:42,300
- Progress?
884
00:51:42,470 --> 00:51:43,470
By promoting the
Gormleigh Film Festival
885
00:51:44,430 --> 00:51:45,180
with those idiotic films?
886
00:51:46,760 --> 00:51:47,760
- They're all art
films, especially hers.
887
00:51:48,890 --> 00:51:49,930
- Art, with a
capital T you mean.
888
00:51:57,900 --> 00:51:59,320
- You don't seem very happy
in Gormleigh these days.
889
00:52:02,190 --> 00:52:02,780
- I've liked it here,
890
00:52:03,860 --> 00:52:05,320
but I think I'll be leaving
after the film festival.
891
00:52:07,950 --> 00:52:09,410
- Yeah, well, I expect I
should be moving on myself.
892
00:52:12,250 --> 00:52:12,870
Things are opening up,
893
00:52:13,370 --> 00:52:14,460
I might become Francoise
publicity manager.
894
00:52:16,790 --> 00:52:17,920
- At least one of
us will be happy.
895
00:52:19,290 --> 00:52:20,460
- Well, I've got to
settle down some time,
896
00:52:22,170 --> 00:52:23,550
you wouldn't want me to stack
deck chairs all my life,
897
00:52:26,840 --> 00:52:27,510
would you?
898
00:52:28,800 --> 00:52:29,260
- No.
899
00:52:29,470 --> 00:52:30,800
- On the other hand, I might
become a big time publisher.
900
00:52:34,270 --> 00:52:35,390
Promote your book, you
can give me a kiss.
901
00:52:58,540 --> 00:52:59,120
(instrumental music)
902
00:53:15,350 --> 00:53:16,510
- Good evening,
once upon a time,
903
00:53:16,680 --> 00:53:17,850
Gormleigh was an average
sort of seaside resort,
904
00:53:18,970 --> 00:53:20,140
where the landladies
locked up the jam
905
00:53:20,850 --> 00:53:22,190
at five o'clock prompt and
there was very little left
906
00:53:22,890 --> 00:53:24,270
to do except carve your
initials on the bus shelters.
907
00:53:25,850 --> 00:53:27,150
But this week Gormleigh started
his first film festival,
908
00:53:28,860 --> 00:53:30,280
and in the best traditions
of film festivals everywhere,
909
00:53:31,900 --> 00:53:32,990
is managing to combine
art with business.
910
00:53:35,860 --> 00:53:36,490
- One more love.
911
00:53:36,660 --> 00:53:37,870
That squimp of yours certainly
livened this place up,
912
00:53:39,200 --> 00:53:39,870
didn't she Jimmy?
913
00:53:39,950 --> 00:53:40,990
- At film festival,
it's axiomatic
914
00:53:41,160 --> 00:53:42,620
that if you can get a film
star to sit on a camel,
915
00:53:43,750 --> 00:53:44,960
the rest of the world will pay
you to let them do the same.
916
00:53:49,960 --> 00:53:50,710
(Jim laughs)
917
00:53:51,340 --> 00:53:51,920
- Get in there boy.
918
00:53:53,010 --> 00:53:53,840
- The publicity men,
919
00:53:53,880 --> 00:53:54,880
who are the chaps who
run film festivals,
920
00:53:55,550 --> 00:53:56,880
think that an event is
cultural if it's foreign,
921
00:53:57,930 --> 00:53:59,350
and even more cultural if it's
wearing a bathing costume.
922
00:54:01,890 --> 00:54:02,560
(trumpet music)
923
00:54:09,900 --> 00:54:11,190
Someone's been feeding them
meat, probably Mr. Jim Stevens,
924
00:54:13,900 --> 00:54:14,740
the publicity man.
925
00:54:14,900 --> 00:54:16,110
The case of champagne and a
few girls and he's managed
926
00:54:17,570 --> 00:54:18,610
to release the
pleasure-loving spirit
927
00:54:19,410 --> 00:54:20,570
which must have been
seething for years
928
00:54:21,240 --> 00:54:22,200
beneath the
Gormleighian blanket.
929
00:54:54,940 --> 00:54:55,940
The Mayors of Bridgemouth
and Westbourne
930
00:54:57,440 --> 00:54:58,480
are here in the
capacity of observers.
931
00:54:59,230 --> 00:55:00,690
- We've been invited to be
made to feel uncomfortable.
932
00:55:01,940 --> 00:55:03,160
- I agree, no self-respecting
holiday maker could relax
933
00:55:05,950 --> 00:55:06,950
in this un-English atmosphere.
934
00:55:07,950 --> 00:55:09,120
- But you've got to
admit it really was
935
00:55:09,290 --> 00:55:10,750
rather crafty Gormleigh
to think of such a thing,
936
00:55:11,830 --> 00:55:12,870
aren't you just a teeny
weeny bit envious?
937
00:55:14,170 --> 00:55:14,960
- It's just a dirty trick
938
00:55:15,370 --> 00:55:16,460
to take our holiday
makers away by--
939
00:55:18,170 --> 00:55:18,960
- By unfair means.
940
00:55:18,960 --> 00:55:19,800
- Yes, precisely.
941
00:55:19,960 --> 00:55:21,000
- Our business in
Westbourne has been ruined.
942
00:55:21,170 --> 00:55:22,340
- But you could start
your own can-can show.
943
00:55:22,960 --> 00:55:23,970
You could even build
your own casino.
944
00:55:25,300 --> 00:55:26,050
- We won't ask our ratepayers
945
00:55:26,840 --> 00:55:27,850
to subsidize anything
so un-English.
946
00:55:28,720 --> 00:55:29,970
We'd rather tighten our belts
and stand by our traditions.
947
00:55:33,560 --> 00:55:34,680
- Excuse me, (speaks
in foreign language).
948
00:55:38,980 --> 00:55:39,400
- Disgusting.
949
00:55:39,610 --> 00:55:40,730
- So, as far as
you're concerned,
950
00:55:41,820 --> 00:55:42,570
no subsidies for the arts then?
951
00:55:43,690 --> 00:55:44,780
- Not for anything
so un-English.
952
00:55:46,360 --> 00:55:47,490
We shan't take this
lying down, oh no.
953
00:55:49,700 --> 00:55:50,780
- We'll show them
what we think of them.
954
00:55:52,410 --> 00:55:53,160
- Who knows where it'll all end?
955
00:55:53,620 --> 00:55:54,750
Apache dancing in
the Floral Hall,
956
00:55:55,660 --> 00:55:56,790
Absinthe in the
ice cream parlors.
957
00:55:58,000 --> 00:55:58,580
(classic music)
958
00:56:36,410 --> 00:56:37,540
Tomorrow, Miss Francoise
Fayol is to officiate
959
00:56:38,910 --> 00:56:40,040
at the opening of
a Nudist Beach,
960
00:56:41,040 --> 00:56:42,040
a novel enterprise
which all well-wishers
961
00:56:43,040 --> 00:56:44,040
are hoping won't
frighten the horses.
962
00:56:45,040 --> 00:56:46,290
She's also the hot favorite,
at least with the Mayor,
963
00:56:47,590 --> 00:56:49,000
the Golden Cockle, which is
the Award for the best actress.
964
00:56:51,130 --> 00:56:52,260
Tonight is the last
night of the festival
965
00:56:53,220 --> 00:56:54,300
and Miss Fayol is
indisputably the star.
966
00:56:58,350 --> 00:56:59,050
Miss Francoise Fayol.
967
00:57:00,050 --> 00:57:00,760
- Mr. Robert Robinson.
968
00:57:00,930 --> 00:57:02,020
- It takes real
courage to set foot
969
00:57:03,310 --> 00:57:04,060
in English seaside resort
970
00:57:04,310 --> 00:57:05,390
at the height of
the holiday season.
971
00:57:05,980 --> 00:57:07,060
What profit do you
think you've had
972
00:57:07,400 --> 00:57:08,150
from this intrepid expedition?
973
00:57:10,110 --> 00:57:11,270
- I've got to know
the English people
974
00:57:11,520 --> 00:57:12,990
and so I hope, deepened
my understanding of life.
975
00:57:16,360 --> 00:57:17,030
- Oh, bravo.
976
00:57:17,070 --> 00:57:18,360
Well, I dare say you found
the publicity rather tedious.
977
00:57:19,660 --> 00:57:20,240
- But I'm an actress.
978
00:57:21,200 --> 00:57:22,580
- News of the World,
very important newspaper.
979
00:57:26,040 --> 00:57:27,080
- What a troupor you
are, but this insight
980
00:57:28,330 --> 00:57:29,790
into the English character
that Gormleigh's given you,
981
00:57:32,080 --> 00:57:32,960
what are you gonna do with it?
982
00:57:34,170 --> 00:57:35,340
- I would like to
use it in my work.
983
00:57:36,340 --> 00:57:37,470
- Season of the
classics possibly?
984
00:57:38,760 --> 00:57:39,170
- Why not?
985
00:57:39,380 --> 00:57:40,090
Shakespeare J'adore.
986
00:57:40,840 --> 00:57:41,430
- This is good news.
987
00:57:41,970 --> 00:57:43,050
- Excuse me darling,
darling, the reception.
988
00:57:46,890 --> 00:57:48,020
If you want any more
details, Jim Stevens,
989
00:57:50,600 --> 00:57:51,190
publicity officer.
990
00:57:51,770 --> 00:57:52,860
Excuse me, make way
for Mademoiselle Fayol.
991
00:57:54,440 --> 00:57:55,190
- Jim, please, let me through.
992
00:57:55,940 --> 00:57:56,980
- Make way for
Mademoiselle Fayol.
993
00:57:57,110 --> 00:57:58,110
Make way for Mademoiselle Fayol.
994
00:58:01,780 --> 00:58:02,110
- Jim.
995
00:58:02,570 --> 00:58:03,070
- Judy.
996
00:58:03,660 --> 00:58:04,110
- Jim, Jim.
997
00:58:08,080 --> 00:58:09,290
- Mademoiselle Fayol will
sign autographs afterwards.
998
00:58:11,250 --> 00:58:11,910
Yes, afterwards.
999
00:58:12,120 --> 00:58:12,710
- Jim, I'm here.
1000
00:58:14,040 --> 00:58:14,630
- Excuse me, excuse me.
1001
00:58:15,080 --> 00:58:16,130
After the show everybody,
after the show.
1002
00:58:18,670 --> 00:58:19,130
Excuse me.
1003
00:58:19,670 --> 00:58:20,800
- As I said earlier,
at film festivals,
1004
00:58:22,010 --> 00:58:23,050
they sometimes
actually show films.
1005
00:58:28,930 --> 00:58:30,020
- Here we are, the best
seats in the house.
1006
00:58:32,140 --> 00:58:33,140
- Thank you, you're
very gallante.
1007
00:58:33,730 --> 00:58:34,890
- Well, if I had my way,
we'd be on the back row.
1008
00:58:37,020 --> 00:58:37,440
- Really?
1009
00:58:37,610 --> 00:58:38,360
Why, are you long-sighted?
1010
00:58:38,520 --> 00:58:39,570
- Quite a little
coquette, aren't you?
1011
00:58:45,240 --> 00:58:46,360
Certificate X, oh, I
do like an adult film.
1012
00:58:49,820 --> 00:58:50,410
"Rue de Boulogne."
1013
00:58:51,530 --> 00:58:52,160
(French music)
1014
00:59:27,190 --> 00:59:27,860
- I can't bear watch it.
1015
00:59:28,950 --> 00:59:30,190
I feel so strange when I
see myself on the screen.
1016
00:59:32,320 --> 00:59:32,990
- Do you?
1017
00:59:33,160 --> 00:59:34,370
Would you like to go outside
for a little refreshment?
1018
00:59:35,200 --> 00:59:36,240
- Yes, forgive me
but I'm so nervous.
1019
00:59:37,200 --> 00:59:38,200
- There's nothing
to be nervous about.
1020
00:59:39,710 --> 00:59:40,450
I'm going to do my very best
1021
00:59:40,830 --> 00:59:41,920
to see that you receive
that Golden Cockle.
1022
00:59:50,090 --> 00:59:50,340
- Ready?
1023
01:00:36,260 --> 01:00:36,920
(gramophone music)
1024
01:01:36,940 --> 01:01:37,520
- Any minute now.
1025
01:01:59,210 --> 01:02:00,330
- Get all this filthy
rubbish off of here.
1026
01:02:01,500 --> 01:02:02,670
You don't want to
watch this stuff.
1027
01:02:04,010 --> 01:02:04,630
(audience shouting)
1028
01:02:18,850 --> 01:02:19,480
- A cup of cheer?
1029
01:02:20,230 --> 01:02:21,020
- I hope they like my film.
1030
01:02:21,350 --> 01:02:22,400
I hate to make these
kind of pictures.
1031
01:02:23,360 --> 01:02:24,190
- I'm sure it's most artistic.
1032
01:02:25,230 --> 01:02:25,650
- Artistic?
1033
01:02:25,820 --> 01:02:26,900
Do you know what I have
to do in this film?
1034
01:02:28,030 --> 01:02:28,360
- No.
1035
01:02:28,440 --> 01:02:29,610
- Some stupid man
comes to kill me.
1036
01:02:30,570 --> 01:02:31,240
- Oh, dear!
1037
01:02:31,360 --> 01:02:32,360
- I'm not afraid, I
put my arms about him.
1038
01:02:33,580 --> 01:02:34,240
- You do?
1039
01:02:34,370 --> 01:02:35,030
- Yes, and what he does?
1040
01:02:35,910 --> 01:02:36,370
- What?
1041
01:02:36,370 --> 01:02:37,200
- He pushes me away.
1042
01:02:38,370 --> 01:02:39,160
- I fall on the bed and he--
1043
01:02:40,000 --> 01:02:40,370
- Yes?
1044
01:02:40,660 --> 01:02:41,750
- Scares me with a
big, how do you say--
1045
01:02:44,170 --> 01:02:44,590
- Chopper?
1046
01:02:45,130 --> 01:02:45,380
- Knife.
1047
01:02:45,540 --> 01:02:47,050
I put on the gramophone and I
start to take off the clothes.
1048
01:02:50,380 --> 01:02:51,010
- All of them?
1049
01:02:51,170 --> 01:02:52,380
- Well, pullover and the
skirt and, how do I call this?
1050
01:03:01,980 --> 01:03:02,390
- Brasserie?
1051
01:03:02,940 --> 01:03:03,390
- Oh.
1052
01:03:04,850 --> 01:03:05,440
- Then what do you do?
1053
01:03:08,400 --> 01:03:09,230
- But it's all so stupid.
1054
01:03:09,820 --> 01:03:10,400
- Yes, well what?
1055
01:03:10,570 --> 01:03:11,400
- Because I'm a serious artist.
1056
01:03:11,900 --> 01:03:12,530
- What did he do?
1057
01:03:13,360 --> 01:03:13,820
(champagne pops)
1058
01:03:14,200 --> 01:03:14,650
- Oh, careful.
1059
01:03:14,820 --> 01:03:15,990
- It doesn't matter,
it doesn't matter.
1060
01:03:17,240 --> 01:03:17,870
Mademoiselle Francoise.
1061
01:03:19,830 --> 01:03:20,410
- Mr. Mayor.
1062
01:03:21,200 --> 01:03:21,790
- Call me Arnold.
1063
01:03:22,290 --> 01:03:22,700
- Arnold.
1064
01:03:25,830 --> 01:03:26,410
What is this?
1065
01:03:26,420 --> 01:03:27,580
- The Golden Cockle,
take it, it's yours.
1066
01:03:31,300 --> 01:03:32,050
- Arnold, you're so sweet.
1067
01:03:34,760 --> 01:03:35,420
Let me give you a kiss.
1068
01:03:36,970 --> 01:03:37,420
(crowd shouting)
1069
01:03:56,650 --> 01:03:57,740
- I like a festival
with a bit of life in it
1070
01:03:58,570 --> 01:03:59,990
and I don't think on that
score that the sourest critic
1071
01:04:01,780 --> 01:04:02,530
could complain about Gormleigh.
1072
01:04:02,820 --> 01:04:04,280
These boys really worry
about cinema, good night.
1073
01:04:06,450 --> 01:04:07,410
(crowd shouts and screams)
1074
01:04:51,120 --> 01:04:52,410
- And as for Mademoiselle
Francoise Fayol,
1075
01:04:54,000 --> 01:04:55,170
the actress who starred
in this atrocious film,
1076
01:04:57,460 --> 01:04:58,670
nature may have endowed her
amply enough to start a riot,
1077
01:05:01,210 --> 01:05:02,260
but anyone who
expected more of her
1078
01:05:03,130 --> 01:05:04,220
than a skillful
strip-tease is going
1079
01:05:05,260 --> 01:05:05,840
to be very disappointed.
1080
01:05:12,350 --> 01:05:12,760
(door knocks)
1081
01:05:14,730 --> 01:05:15,390
- Who is it?
1082
01:05:18,020 --> 01:05:18,600
- Hello, it's me.
1083
01:05:23,280 --> 01:05:23,690
- Come in, Jim.
1084
01:05:27,700 --> 01:05:28,530
- Sleeping late I see.
1085
01:05:32,990 --> 01:05:33,580
Sorry about the notice.
1086
01:05:34,410 --> 01:05:35,530
- When I'm unhappy, I
can't get out of bed.
1087
01:05:37,580 --> 01:05:38,540
I just want to bury myself.
1088
01:05:40,500 --> 01:05:41,250
- It's only Judy, she's jealous.
1089
01:05:44,840 --> 01:05:45,500
- Jealous?
1090
01:05:45,840 --> 01:05:46,510
- You and me.
1091
01:05:47,670 --> 01:05:48,510
- Oh, you don't want me?
1092
01:05:48,550 --> 01:05:49,550
Nobody wants me.
- Oh, no, there, there.
1093
01:05:50,760 --> 01:05:51,550
Come on, don't cry.
1094
01:05:53,340 --> 01:05:54,100
- I am so miserable, so lonely.
1095
01:05:57,430 --> 01:05:58,020
- Well, I'm here.
1096
01:06:00,560 --> 01:06:01,190
- Pass me a roll please.
1097
01:06:04,100 --> 01:06:04,690
So awful, like a circus.
1098
01:06:07,150 --> 01:06:08,570
And I'm like a funny animal
they are all looking at.
1099
01:06:10,650 --> 01:06:11,320
- Butter?
1100
01:06:11,570 --> 01:06:12,110
- Yes, please.
1101
01:06:12,700 --> 01:06:13,860
And I'm all alone in
this strange place,
1102
01:06:15,820 --> 01:06:16,570
no one to look after me.
1103
01:06:17,740 --> 01:06:18,410
- But I'm here.
1104
01:06:22,580 --> 01:06:23,040
Thank you.
1105
01:06:23,830 --> 01:06:24,660
- Will you look after me?
1106
01:06:25,580 --> 01:06:26,420
- Of course, I will.
1107
01:06:27,420 --> 01:06:28,000
- You're so kind.
1108
01:06:31,670 --> 01:06:32,510
You're taking advantage.
1109
01:06:32,670 --> 01:06:33,590
- Oh no, no, no,
no, no, I'm not.
1110
01:06:35,430 --> 01:06:36,010
(telephone rings)
1111
01:06:39,590 --> 01:06:40,350
- Pass me a coffee, please.
1112
01:06:42,770 --> 01:06:43,600
(speaks in foreign language)
1113
01:06:44,060 --> 01:06:44,560
Yes.
1114
01:06:44,600 --> 01:06:45,480
(speaking in foreign language)
1115
01:07:07,370 --> 01:07:08,120
- Aren't you lonely anymore?
1116
01:07:10,420 --> 01:07:11,000
What are you doing?
1117
01:07:11,750 --> 01:07:12,590
- Packing, darling.
1118
01:07:13,000 --> 01:07:13,750
- Who was that on the phone?
1119
01:07:14,380 --> 01:07:14,960
- Vladek, I'm so happy.
1120
01:07:15,380 --> 01:07:16,630
You wants me at 12:15 at
the station, I must hurry.
1121
01:07:18,300 --> 01:07:18,630
- I see.
1122
01:07:20,010 --> 01:07:20,760
- He missed me, he does love me.
1123
01:07:21,630 --> 01:07:22,300
- Yeah, I'm sure.
1124
01:07:22,470 --> 01:07:23,220
- He has another film for me.
1125
01:07:23,850 --> 01:07:24,350
- Crazy.
1126
01:07:24,510 --> 01:07:25,760
Hey, hey, you can't leave, you
got to open the Nudist Beach.
1127
01:07:26,760 --> 01:07:27,890
- Oh, I must go to
Vladek, darling.
1128
01:07:28,770 --> 01:07:30,180
- But the Mayor and all the
councilors are arriving.
1129
01:07:32,560 --> 01:07:33,310
Anyway, you left that Vladek
1130
01:07:33,480 --> 01:07:34,610
because he made you take
all your clothes off.
1131
01:07:36,400 --> 01:07:36,650
- So?
1132
01:07:37,280 --> 01:07:37,650
And you?
1133
01:07:37,690 --> 01:07:38,820
At least it's not
usually raining
1134
01:07:38,990 --> 01:07:39,730
when I take them off for him.
1135
01:07:41,650 --> 01:07:42,700
- I don't know what
they're gonna say
1136
01:07:42,900 --> 01:07:43,650
if they see you leaving.
1137
01:07:44,530 --> 01:07:45,660
- You better smuggle
me out, disguised.
1138
01:07:47,910 --> 01:07:48,660
- Yeah, disguised.
1139
01:07:51,450 --> 01:07:52,660
I've smuggled them in before,
never smuggled them out.
1140
01:07:54,920 --> 01:07:55,580
(dramatic music)
1141
01:08:49,470 --> 01:08:49,720
No, no.
1142
01:08:53,050 --> 01:08:53,720
That's it.
1143
01:09:32,760 --> 01:09:33,220
Oh, no, no.
1144
01:09:33,590 --> 01:09:34,010
- No, what?
1145
01:09:34,760 --> 01:09:35,590
You still fancy me?
1146
01:09:35,930 --> 01:09:36,760
- I've you got your wig on.
1147
01:09:38,100 --> 01:09:38,760
Got your wig off.
1148
01:09:38,930 --> 01:09:40,010
- Sometimes it's easier
for me to be myself
1149
01:09:40,850 --> 01:09:41,760
rather than Francoise Fayol.
1150
01:09:42,140 --> 01:09:43,230
- Now, you just
can't go like this.
1151
01:09:44,770 --> 01:09:45,480
- Why not darling?
1152
01:09:45,850 --> 01:09:46,940
- But who's gonna
open the Nudist Beach?
1153
01:09:47,230 --> 01:09:48,610
I mean, the Mayor will be there,
I've written him a speech.
1154
01:09:49,480 --> 01:09:50,520
There will be a band,
it's my big day.
1155
01:09:51,820 --> 01:09:52,770
- Well, then you open it cherie.
1156
01:09:56,070 --> 01:09:56,820
(speaks in foreign language)
1157
01:10:11,790 --> 01:10:12,920
- Miss Fayol, I just
wanted to apologize--
1158
01:10:14,090 --> 01:10:14,840
- Too late, she's scarpered.
1159
01:10:17,220 --> 01:10:17,800
(Judy laughs)
1160
01:10:19,800 --> 01:10:20,970
- You look marvelous, you
should have been born blonde.
1161
01:10:23,850 --> 01:10:24,680
- Ha-ha, it's not funny.
1162
01:10:26,020 --> 01:10:26,680
- No, tragic.
1163
01:10:26,930 --> 01:10:27,810
- Yeah, it's tragic, all right.
1164
01:10:29,020 --> 01:10:30,140
She's gone but you're
pleased, aren't you?
1165
01:10:31,190 --> 01:10:31,810
You were jealous.
1166
01:10:32,770 --> 01:10:33,190
- Jealous, me?
1167
01:10:34,400 --> 01:10:34,820
- Yes, you.
1168
01:10:34,980 --> 01:10:36,110
- I meant what I wrote,
it with a lousy film.
1169
01:10:37,440 --> 01:10:38,190
- She was a sensitive artist.
1170
01:10:39,450 --> 01:10:40,030
- Sensitive artist?
1171
01:10:40,820 --> 01:10:41,820
Just because she had
that oo-la-la accent.
1172
01:10:43,450 --> 01:10:44,530
- Yeah, well, that's
not all she had.
1173
01:10:44,950 --> 01:10:45,820
- All that obvious sex appeal,
1174
01:10:46,830 --> 01:10:47,830
we could all do that
if you wanted to.
1175
01:10:49,080 --> 01:10:49,830
- Oh, can we now?
1176
01:10:50,000 --> 01:10:51,160
Well, what about a bit
of obvious sex appeal
1177
01:10:52,710 --> 01:10:53,120
from little you?
1178
01:10:54,580 --> 01:10:55,170
- Don't be so crude.
1179
01:10:56,830 --> 01:10:57,710
- Yeah, you're dead right, Judy.
1180
01:10:59,090 --> 01:11:00,550
You stick to your books
and your intellectual chat,
1181
01:11:02,300 --> 01:11:03,510
I wouldn't wanna see you
make a fool of yourself.
1182
01:11:03,880 --> 01:11:05,390
- You're the big expert on
sex appeal now, are you?
1183
01:11:06,840 --> 01:11:08,310
You had her eating out of
your hand, you understood her.
1184
01:11:10,970 --> 01:11:11,850
That must have been difficult,
1185
01:11:12,180 --> 01:11:13,350
like figuring out
the two times table.
1186
01:11:14,940 --> 01:11:16,100
Anyway, there's nothing
wrong with my figure.
1187
01:11:17,860 --> 01:11:18,560
- Who knows?
1188
01:11:18,860 --> 01:11:19,610
Nobody's ever seen it.
1189
01:11:22,230 --> 01:11:22,860
(doors knocks)
1190
01:11:28,240 --> 01:11:28,860
- Is she ready?
1191
01:11:28,860 --> 01:11:30,280
It's nearly time for the strip
and the unveiling ceremony.
1192
01:11:31,490 --> 01:11:32,240
I hope the visibility's good.
1193
01:11:33,450 --> 01:11:33,870
(piano music)
1194
01:11:38,870 --> 01:11:39,420
Where is she?
1195
01:11:40,380 --> 01:11:40,880
- She's off.
1196
01:11:40,960 --> 01:11:42,420
All that femininity, and the
vivaciousness has escaped us.
1197
01:11:45,800 --> 01:11:46,880
- What about the opening
of the Nudist Beach?
1198
01:11:48,470 --> 01:11:49,880
Guaranteed to give absolute
detail up to 100 yards.
1199
01:11:50,850 --> 01:11:51,890
- Well, you'll just have
to go back to girly mags
1200
01:11:52,890 --> 01:11:53,720
for your nature studies.
1201
01:11:54,890 --> 01:11:55,810
- Now, now, now, you look,
1202
01:11:58,850 --> 01:11:59,890
the Mayor is on his
way to escort her.
1203
01:12:00,480 --> 01:12:01,520
- Yeah, there's another
one gonna be very,
1204
01:12:02,650 --> 01:12:03,230
very disappointed.
1205
01:12:03,610 --> 01:12:04,360
I bet he's got a telescope.
1206
01:12:04,900 --> 01:12:05,900
- What's the matter with him?
1207
01:12:05,900 --> 01:12:07,070
Doesn't he realize the
Mayor's gonna go mad?
1208
01:12:07,820 --> 01:12:08,900
We won't only lose our
jobs, we'll be lynched.
1209
01:12:09,990 --> 01:12:11,150
There are thousands
there waiting to ogle.
1210
01:12:12,070 --> 01:12:12,910
- Don't blame me, mate.
1211
01:12:12,910 --> 01:12:14,370
Blame our university graduate
with her critical integrity.
1212
01:12:17,040 --> 01:12:17,910
- Well, what are we gonna do?
1213
01:12:18,540 --> 01:12:19,700
- I've got good idea,
look, if you leave now,
1214
01:12:20,910 --> 01:12:21,670
you'll just catch her.
1215
01:12:21,910 --> 01:12:22,830
She's getting the 12:15 train.
1216
01:12:23,710 --> 01:12:24,290
- Oh, come on, Jim.
1217
01:12:24,670 --> 01:12:25,750
- Look, you're the ones
with all the brains.
1218
01:12:27,130 --> 01:12:27,920
Why don't you try using them?
1219
01:12:29,300 --> 01:12:29,920
I am off.
1220
01:12:30,510 --> 01:12:31,260
- Jim, Jim boy, Jim, Jim.
1221
01:12:33,930 --> 01:12:34,930
We've all had a good laugh.
1222
01:12:37,300 --> 01:12:38,430
12:15 train, what
time is it now?
1223
01:12:40,930 --> 01:12:41,390
- 12 o'clock.
1224
01:12:43,270 --> 01:12:43,930
- 15 minutes.
1225
01:12:45,150 --> 01:12:45,940
You're gonna do something?
1226
01:12:46,060 --> 01:12:47,190
- Yeah, you pray
I'll sing a hymn.
1227
01:12:48,940 --> 01:12:49,690
At least we'll go with dignity.
1228
01:12:50,940 --> 01:12:51,940
- That leaves me, doesn't it?
1229
01:12:53,700 --> 01:12:54,740
- You'll never
catch it, you know?
1230
01:12:55,950 --> 01:12:56,360
- Yes, I will.
1231
01:12:57,570 --> 01:12:58,320
I've got an infallible method.
1232
01:12:59,280 --> 01:12:59,950
- Really, what?
1233
01:13:00,540 --> 01:13:01,120
- Run like mad man.
1234
01:13:05,960 --> 01:13:06,830
Oops, it's the Mayor, the Mayor.
1235
01:13:08,960 --> 01:13:09,710
What are we gonna do?
1236
01:13:09,880 --> 01:13:10,960
- Go this way, go,
go, no, that way!
1237
01:13:20,390 --> 01:13:20,970
Hurry up.
1238
01:13:21,760 --> 01:13:23,060
- These and the old Liggett
charm, I'll bring her back
1239
01:13:24,220 --> 01:13:24,970
if I can run fast enough.
1240
01:13:34,480 --> 01:13:34,980
- Just a minute.
1241
01:13:38,490 --> 01:13:39,240
- Mademoiselle, may I come in?
1242
01:13:41,490 --> 01:13:42,240
(speaks in foreign language)
1243
01:13:43,870 --> 01:13:44,450
- I am not ready.
1244
01:13:46,240 --> 01:13:46,990
- There's no need to hurry.
1245
01:13:47,370 --> 01:13:48,370
We must have you
looking your best today.
1246
01:13:51,830 --> 01:13:52,580
(speaks in foreign language)
1247
01:13:53,290 --> 01:13:54,420
- I must prepare myself
for the great moment.
1248
01:13:56,130 --> 01:13:57,300
- Perhaps I could be
of some assistance.
1249
01:14:00,010 --> 01:14:01,010
- No, no (speaks in
foreign language).
1250
01:14:01,630 --> 01:14:02,380
Turn your back and count to 10.
1251
01:14:05,600 --> 01:14:06,180
Promise no peeping?
1252
01:14:07,010 --> 01:14:08,010
- Promise, one, two,
three, four, five, six,
1253
01:14:12,020 --> 01:14:13,020
seven, eight,
nine, 10, finished.
1254
01:14:23,450 --> 01:14:24,820
- Cherie, could you
please get me my baggage?
1255
01:14:29,370 --> 01:14:30,030
- Certainly.
1256
01:14:35,040 --> 01:14:35,580
(Judy screams)
1257
01:15:18,120 --> 01:15:18,790
(birds chirping)
1258
01:15:24,880 --> 01:15:25,630
Are you ready, Francoise?
1259
01:15:35,090 --> 01:15:39,100
♪ Pretty little turtle dove ♪
1260
01:15:39,100 --> 01:15:39,770
♪ Sitting on a vine ♪
1261
01:15:41,940 --> 01:15:43,060
♪ Longing for her ♪
own true love ♪
1262
01:15:46,100 --> 01:15:51,110
♪ As I do for mine, for mine ♪
1263
01:15:51,900 --> 01:15:52,610
♪ As I do for mine ♪
1264
01:15:57,620 --> 01:15:58,120
(soothing music)
1265
01:16:56,960 --> 01:16:57,380
- I am ready.
1266
01:17:00,260 --> 01:17:00,930
- Shall we go?
1267
01:17:01,090 --> 01:17:02,340
I bet you can't wait for the
soft breezes to carress you.
1268
01:17:19,530 --> 01:17:20,280
- It's nice day for the concert.
1269
01:17:21,650 --> 01:17:22,190
- Lovely.
1270
01:17:23,950 --> 01:17:24,360
Where you been?
1271
01:17:24,740 --> 01:17:25,200
You're all wet.
1272
01:17:25,990 --> 01:17:27,200
- I thought I'd have a
stroll up to the station.
1273
01:17:28,620 --> 01:17:29,200
- Want a bit of cake?
1274
01:17:32,120 --> 01:17:32,710
Did you bring her back?
1275
01:17:34,210 --> 01:17:35,210
- I would have done,
don't you worry,
1276
01:17:36,210 --> 01:17:37,210
if they hadn't slammed
the gates in my face.
1277
01:17:41,960 --> 01:17:42,720
What are we gonna do now?
1278
01:17:43,720 --> 01:17:44,720
- Well, we can
always go to Clacton.
1279
01:17:47,010 --> 01:17:48,100
- They'll have heard
of us, don't you worry.
1280
01:17:50,220 --> 01:17:51,220
- Wish they'd stop that music.
1281
01:17:52,100 --> 01:17:52,680
(instrumental music)
1282
01:17:59,190 --> 01:17:59,770
(audience clapping)
1283
01:18:02,900 --> 01:18:04,190
- And now, ladies and
gentlemen, members of the press,
1284
01:18:06,110 --> 01:18:07,320
Mademoiselle Francoise Fayol
will personally inaugrate
1285
01:18:09,990 --> 01:18:10,570
the Nudist Beach.
1286
01:18:14,160 --> 01:18:15,410
Which will be open from this
day forward all summer long,
1287
01:18:17,620 --> 01:18:19,080
for the benefit of those who
wish to answer nature's call.
1288
01:18:21,790 --> 01:18:23,250
This is the first beach of
its kind, if I may say so,
1289
01:18:25,250 --> 01:18:26,050
in any English seaside resort.
1290
01:18:27,210 --> 01:18:28,420
And now, back to nature with
Mademoiselle Francoise Fayol.
1291
01:19:01,960 --> 01:19:02,290
- Henry.
1292
01:19:02,750 --> 01:19:03,250
- What?
1293
01:19:03,290 --> 01:19:04,330
Do us a favor, whip out
and see what's going on.
1294
01:19:11,010 --> 01:19:11,420
Go and be me.
1295
01:19:17,470 --> 01:19:18,140
Don't get wet.
1296
01:19:28,600 --> 01:19:29,310
What do you want?
1297
01:19:29,560 --> 01:19:30,230
- Binoculars.
1298
01:19:32,570 --> 01:19:33,320
- What you gonna look at?
1299
01:19:34,070 --> 01:19:34,320
- F.F.
1300
01:20:41,840 --> 01:20:42,340
- Judy!
1301
01:20:43,260 --> 01:20:43,670
(Judy sobs)
1302
01:20:46,550 --> 01:20:47,390
Judy, what are you doing?
1303
01:20:47,510 --> 01:20:48,350
Come out of there.
1304
01:20:48,390 --> 01:20:49,430
- I can't, I haven't
got any clothes on.
1305
01:20:51,810 --> 01:20:53,270
- What you want to take
your clothes off in front
1306
01:20:53,520 --> 01:20:54,350
of all these people for?
1307
01:20:54,390 --> 01:20:55,270
I've got a good mind about you.
1308
01:20:56,730 --> 01:20:57,390
Put this on.
1309
01:20:57,390 --> 01:20:58,860
- Francoise was gone, all
those people were waiting.
1310
01:21:01,400 --> 01:21:02,530
I didn't want you
to get in trouble.
1311
01:21:04,860 --> 01:21:06,030
- Oh, you little nit, I
don't care about them.
1312
01:21:07,400 --> 01:21:08,320
- You don't care about anyone.
1313
01:21:08,660 --> 01:21:10,120
- I think you know better
than that, don't you?
1314
01:21:11,700 --> 01:21:12,410
- Yeah, I guess so.
1315
01:21:14,410 --> 01:21:15,330
- You'll catch a death of cold.
1316
01:21:16,370 --> 01:21:17,170
Get out of it you morons.
1317
01:21:27,590 --> 01:21:28,420
- You all right then?
1318
01:21:28,420 --> 01:21:29,220
- We've been for a swim.
1319
01:21:29,380 --> 01:21:30,430
- [Mayor] You'll never
work again, any of you.
1320
01:21:33,310 --> 01:21:33,890
- What a lovely day.
1321
01:21:35,430 --> 01:21:36,220
(instrumental music)
1322
01:21:56,700 --> 01:21:57,370
(cool music)
93537
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