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DOWNLOADED FROM WWW.AWAFIM.TV
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[The Author narrates] Long, long ago,
in a land not that far away,
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00:00:11,812 --> 00:00:15,271
a succession of kings
believed God granted them the right
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to rule England however they chose.
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You know Henry the Eighth?
Giant redheaded Tudor King.
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Treated his wives like Kleenex:
one blow and you're out.
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Divorced, beheaded, died,
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divorced, beheaded, survived.
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Whew.
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[Author] Next on the throne
was his son, Edward.
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Oh dear.
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00:00:33,937 --> 00:00:37,562
When he died, the Kingdom expected
the crown to go to his half sisters,
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00:00:37,562 --> 00:00:39,479
{\an8}Mary, or even Elizabeth.
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{\an8}But instead, came a total bloody shocker.
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Lady Jane Grey.
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00:00:45,979 --> 00:00:48,854
Intellectual rebel,
a bit of a pain in the ass,
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and a political pawn
for her ambitious noble family.
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Jane was married without her consent
and crowned Queen against her will.
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Then, just nine days later,
she was branded a traitor.
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And...
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wham... off with her head.
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Jane could have been
the leader England needed.
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But instead, history remembers her
as the ultimate damsel in distress.
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Fuck that.
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What if history were different?
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[♪ Tegan and Sara: "Rebel Rebel"]
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Never do anything you don't want to do.
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[Esther] I do want it, though, Lady Jane.
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Well, then my advice is,
if his member looks pustular...
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- Don't shag him.
- Wise words, Susannah.
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- I made this salve to cure your itch.
- Aren't you clever?
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Isn't she clever?
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So, when's my cunny set for shagging?
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A few weeks.
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I can't abstain for a few weeks.
Could you?
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I couldn't.
But Jane wouldn't know.
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She's a lady.
Saving herself for marriage.
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I'm saving myself for myself, actually.
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In fact, I may never marry.
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[laughing]
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Yes, mock the person
who's curing your vagina.
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[Esther] But how will you live?
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What will you do?
What would your mother say?
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- Lady Frances doesn't know.
- And I don't really care what she thinks.
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I've got bigger plans.
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Go on, tell her.
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I'm writing the world's first
complete compendium
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of England's medicinal herbs
and their uses.
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- Herbs?
- Herbs.
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Herbs.
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Text, and drawings
for those who can't read.
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I intend to publish it and sell it.
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- [knock on door]
- Perhaps I can make enough money
to actually live independently.
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Where is the bloody Calendula officinalis?
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- [Susannah] Jane?
- Found it.
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- The Duke of Leicester is coming.
- Bollocks. Is that today?
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- She told me to get flowers.
- [Susannah laughs]
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Use it twice a day!
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[♪ Tegan and Sara: "Rebel Rebel"
continues]
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- ♪ Doo, doo, doo, doo-doo ♪
- [whooping]
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♪ Doo-doo-doo ♪
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♪ Doo, doo, doo, doo-doo, doo-doo-doo... ♪
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[Susannah] Jane, look.
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New stable boy. Lush.
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He's teaching me how to ride.
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♪ They put you down ♪
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- [both chuckle]
- ♪ They say I'm wrong ♪
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- [bells ringing]
- ♪ You tacky thing, you put them on ♪
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♪ Rebel Rebel, you've torn your dress ♪
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♪ Rebel Rebel, your face is a mess ♪
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♪ Rebel Rebel ♪
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- ♪ How could they know? ♪
- [horses neighing]
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♪ Hot tramp, I love you so... ♪
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- [horses neighing]
- [horseman] Whoa!
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{\an8}- [song fades]
- Whoa.
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[horses neigh]
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Did you chew them?
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- Shut up, Margaret.
- They're lovely.
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- Shut up, Katherine.
- Shut up, all of you.
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And smile. Earn your keep.
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[Author] When Jane's father died
with no male heir,
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his great-uncle once removed,
the Duke of Leicester,
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inherited everything,
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leaving the Grey widow and daughters
dependent on Leicester's charity
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for their very survival.
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[cackles]
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[Margaret grunts]
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[Duke] Ghastly crowds on the London Road.
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A hanging at Chepstow.
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Oh, no, what a bother.
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- I think we should burn them all.
- Margaret.
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Quite agree, poppet.
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The latest Division Laws stipulate death
for the trespassing Ethian menace,
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00:04:06,479 --> 00:04:08,646
but not method,
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and interpretation is
the enemy of efficiency.
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You've grown up, haven't you?
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Bless you, child. [chuckles]
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You'd be prettier if you smiled.
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Would I?
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[Frances] Your Grace,
now do you have the--
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[flies buzzing]
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Elevation eases my gout.
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Cherries are good for that.
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- You know, I read that--
- [Duke] You read?
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In a book?
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00:04:38,812 --> 00:04:42,479
I never permitted my wives--
all dead in childbirth--
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The fruits of my loins are very large.
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[Duke cackling]
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I never permitted any of them
to read or even own any books at all.
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Yes, why did you burden us
with all this education, Mother?
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Because stupid women are tedious.
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[whispers] What about stupid men?
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- Eh? What's that?
- Oh, nothing, nothing, Your Grace.
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Leicester, pray tell,
do you have the confirmation?
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Ah. Yes, indeed I do.
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Jane!
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Sweet child, we have secured for you
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the most thrilling honor one can bestow
upon a young noblewoman.
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Your marriage.
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[Author] Oh, shit.
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My marriage?
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[Duke] What modesty!
To believe that you are going to die...
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Shut up!
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- I'm sorry?
- You should be!
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You're wrong about everything.
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I do not look prettier when I smile,
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and I am not destined to be wretched.
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- I am--
- Overwhelmed by the wonderful news.
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Now I will escort Jane to her chambers.
[chuckles]
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Come along.
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- Forgive her, Your Grace.
- [Duke laughs]
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[mutters indistinctly]
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How dare you plot my life
with that cretin?
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- You drove me to this.
- But I don't want to be married.
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You no longer define your life
by what you don't want.
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You refuse to discuss suitors.
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Or hunt or dance or do anything
except for gossip with your servant
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and fiddle with
those infernal herbs and books.
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Lord Guildford Dudley
will be your husband.
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Guildford Dudley?
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Guildford Dudley?
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I've heard of him.
The girls at Court say he's vile.
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He-he drinks, fights, gambles.
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He cavorts with women of ill repute.
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He is the last man I would ever marry.
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Jane, this marriage protects us.
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Leicester will soon tire
of his charity towards us,
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and I do not intend to leave my house
for a wretched hovel in Croydon.
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Your father left us nothing.
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Our only wealth is blood.
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And you are pure Verity
and cousin to the King.
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The Dudleys will do anything for power,
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and they are very, very, very rich.
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You mercenary bitch.
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We do not do that anymore.
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In three days' time, you will be wed.
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I will do everything in my power
to get out of this marriage.
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[chuckling] Jane.
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You have no power.
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My book.
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Where is my book?
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What did you do?
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I threw that wretched thing on the fire.
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[dramatic orchestral music playing]
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[insects chirping]
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[Author] There comes a point
in everyone's life
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when you realize you simply cannot put up
with your mother's bullshit
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for another moment.
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[♪ Kate Nash:
"All Day and All of the Night"]
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Tell me what pleases you.
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♪ To be with you in the daytime ♪
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Yeah, this works.
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♪ I'm not content to be with you
in the daytime ♪
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♪ I'm not content to be with you... ♪
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[panting]
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[sighs]
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Psst.
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Psst!
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[whispers] No.
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[whispers] Now.
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[sighs]
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[song fades]
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- We're leaving.
- I was rather enjoying that.
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- Wait, what did you say?
- We're leaving. Now. Right now.
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We'll go north,
find a village where nobody knows us.
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I'll make my cures, and you can sell--
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- Are you crazy?
- I have been trapped here my entire life.
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If I marry, I will be trapped
somewhere else.
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Now, that is crazy.
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- Jane, you don't know
what it's like out there.
- You sound like...
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...like my mother.
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- It's nearly dawn. We must hurry.
- It's dangerous.
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Ethians, the Pack.
People talk of civil war.
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You don't really believe that,
now, do you?
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00:09:00,937 --> 00:09:03,062
I mean, when's the last time
you even saw an Ethian?
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What do you know? You don't go anywhere.
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Jane.
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When I was a kid, I--
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Your family kicked you out.
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- Yes, you told me.
There was a man involved.
- No, that's not--
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You won't be safe.
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00:09:15,229 --> 00:09:18,062
I will never be safe
while my mother is trying to barter me.
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00:09:19,479 --> 00:09:22,646
I want my life to be mine, forever.
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- Jane--
- Then stay.
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I'll be fine on my own.
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00:09:26,187 --> 00:09:28,146
You'll be dead in a week.
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00:09:30,562 --> 00:09:31,646
We'll need some money.
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00:09:32,979 --> 00:09:34,187
Do you like my ring?
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My sweet mother is a sound sleeper.
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- ♪ The only time I feel all right ♪
- [♪ Kate Nash:
"All Day and All of the Night" resumes]
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♪ Is by your side ♪
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00:09:43,604 --> 00:09:46,396
♪ Girl, I want to be with you ♪
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00:09:46,396 --> 00:09:49,437
{\an8}♪ All of the time, all day... ♪
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00:09:49,437 --> 00:09:54,354
We'll follow the old path to Marlow,
hop the river barge, start our lives.
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00:09:54,354 --> 00:09:55,896
♪ All of the time ♪
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00:09:55,896 --> 00:09:58,729
♪ All day and all of the night ♪
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00:09:58,729 --> 00:10:02,104
{\an8}♪ Oh, girl, I want to be with you ♪
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00:10:02,104 --> 00:10:03,562
{\an8}♪ All of the time ♪
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00:10:03,562 --> 00:10:05,854
♪ All day and all of the night... ♪
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00:10:05,854 --> 00:10:07,687
Hey, Jane.
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00:10:07,687 --> 00:10:09,687
What?
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00:10:09,687 --> 00:10:10,812
[song ends]
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00:10:10,812 --> 00:10:12,229
What's that sound?
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00:10:12,229 --> 00:10:13,646
[horn blows in distance]
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00:10:13,646 --> 00:10:15,479
[horse neighs]
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00:10:15,479 --> 00:10:17,062
[dogs barking]
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00:10:17,062 --> 00:10:18,146
Run.
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00:10:19,896 --> 00:10:21,354
[dramatic music playing]
229
00:10:21,354 --> 00:10:22,771
[barking continues]
230
00:10:23,854 --> 00:10:25,104
{\an8}Hurry!
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00:10:26,354 --> 00:10:27,771
[men shouting]
232
00:10:30,062 --> 00:10:31,437
- Come on!
- I'm coming.
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00:10:35,271 --> 00:10:36,771
Hyah!
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00:10:38,146 --> 00:10:40,479
[panting]
235
00:10:41,562 --> 00:10:43,396
[riders shouting]
236
00:10:46,396 --> 00:10:48,396
Hyah! Hyah!
237
00:10:49,396 --> 00:10:51,562
Come on.
238
00:10:53,521 --> 00:10:55,687
Stop! They're here!
239
00:10:58,146 --> 00:11:00,354
That's the thief that stole my ring
240
00:11:00,354 --> 00:11:01,729
- and kidnapped my daughter.
- What? No. Mother, it wasn't--
241
00:11:01,729 --> 00:11:04,229
She didn't. Let go of her! It was me!
242
00:11:04,229 --> 00:11:05,979
- It was me!
- Get off me, you langer!
243
00:11:05,979 --> 00:11:08,396
It was not you. Understand?
244
00:11:08,396 --> 00:11:09,854
I forced her to come!
245
00:11:09,854 --> 00:11:13,937
Your maid will be hanged for stealing,
if she doesn't die in prison first.
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00:11:15,271 --> 00:11:17,354
Jane, forgive me.
247
00:11:17,354 --> 00:11:18,437
[grunts]
248
00:11:20,896 --> 00:11:22,729
[hawk screeches]
249
00:11:25,146 --> 00:11:26,812
Ethian.
250
00:11:26,812 --> 00:11:30,021
Have you forgotten the punishment
for hiding an Ethian?
251
00:11:30,021 --> 00:11:31,312
I had no idea.
252
00:11:31,312 --> 00:11:34,187
Then you're a fool. Go home!
253
00:11:34,187 --> 00:11:36,271
♪ ♪
254
00:11:43,646 --> 00:11:45,187
[Author] A hawk.
255
00:11:45,187 --> 00:11:48,146
Yes, Susannah is a hawk.
256
00:11:48,146 --> 00:11:50,021
Did I mention that in this world,
257
00:11:50,021 --> 00:11:53,437
some people can
transform themselves into an animal?
258
00:11:53,437 --> 00:11:55,271
They're called Ethians.
259
00:11:55,271 --> 00:11:58,646
Everyone else, like Jane, is Verity.
260
00:11:58,646 --> 00:12:01,521
Jane has always known
about Ethians, of course.
261
00:12:01,521 --> 00:12:03,687
She just never expected that her maid,
262
00:12:03,687 --> 00:12:06,729
her friend, was one of them.
263
00:12:06,729 --> 00:12:09,687
Jane was taught
that Ethians are dangerous abominations
264
00:12:09,687 --> 00:12:12,812
{\an8}sent by Satan
to destroy the Verity way of life.
265
00:12:12,812 --> 00:12:14,812
{\an8}Poppycock, of course.
266
00:12:14,812 --> 00:12:17,937
As an Ethian,
you can't choose your animal form,
267
00:12:17,937 --> 00:12:21,271
but you can switch back and forth
whenever you please.
268
00:12:21,271 --> 00:12:23,521
Ethianism skips generations
269
00:12:23,521 --> 00:12:26,771
and pops up now and again,
usually in puberty,
270
00:12:26,771 --> 00:12:28,646
during a moment of high emotion.
271
00:12:28,646 --> 00:12:30,771
One minute,
you're fighting with your sister,
272
00:12:30,771 --> 00:12:33,104
- the next, bam, you're a badger.
- [badger chitters]
273
00:12:33,104 --> 00:12:35,604
It's just one of those things
you're born with,
274
00:12:35,604 --> 00:12:39,437
like being left-handed
or the color of your eyes.
275
00:12:39,437 --> 00:12:42,771
For decades, Ethians have been reviled,
persecuted, banned.
276
00:12:42,771 --> 00:12:46,729
And then King Henry,
renowned shithead that he was,
277
00:12:46,729 --> 00:12:51,271
exiled them to the wilderness,
where they must hunt, beg or steal
278
00:12:51,271 --> 00:12:53,062
{\an8}to survive.
279
00:12:53,062 --> 00:12:57,062
{\an8}Jane has always wondered
what it's like to be an Ethian,
280
00:12:57,062 --> 00:13:00,646
but she'd never known one in real life.
281
00:13:01,729 --> 00:13:06,896
And real life, as we know,
can be a real kick in the tits.
282
00:13:06,896 --> 00:13:08,437
[Margaret] Why is Jane sulking?
283
00:13:08,437 --> 00:13:10,687
[Katherine] Mummy's right.
Jane's just being difficult.
284
00:13:10,687 --> 00:13:13,104
Oh, how typical of you to be on her side.
285
00:13:14,562 --> 00:13:17,021
Ow! Not fair. I wasn't ready.
286
00:13:17,021 --> 00:13:18,187
I've an idea.
287
00:13:18,187 --> 00:13:21,354
Let's test all the servants
with the dunking to see if they're Ethian.
288
00:13:21,354 --> 00:13:22,437
[Jane] A dunking?
289
00:13:23,604 --> 00:13:27,562
And who will feed you and make you fires
when all the servants are dead?
290
00:13:28,604 --> 00:13:30,229
- Take that!
- Ah!
291
00:13:30,229 --> 00:13:31,854
Margaret, are you all right?
292
00:13:31,854 --> 00:13:34,604
[laughing] Tricked you.
293
00:13:34,604 --> 00:13:36,687
Fake blood? Margaret.
294
00:13:36,687 --> 00:13:37,771
That's cheating!
295
00:13:37,771 --> 00:13:40,062
You mispronounced "winning."
296
00:13:40,062 --> 00:13:42,687
[upbeat music playing]
297
00:13:47,104 --> 00:13:49,021
[Jane] Where are you going?
298
00:13:50,979 --> 00:13:52,312
Where's she going?
299
00:13:52,312 --> 00:13:54,312
To London to see Lord Dudley.
300
00:13:54,312 --> 00:13:55,521
Planning your wedding.
301
00:14:06,437 --> 00:14:07,979
Hey!
302
00:14:07,979 --> 00:14:09,396
Follow that barge.
303
00:14:09,396 --> 00:14:11,479
♪ ♪
304
00:14:23,479 --> 00:14:25,437
[heavy lock clacks]
305
00:14:25,437 --> 00:14:27,604
[door creaks]
306
00:14:27,604 --> 00:14:29,604
- Lady Frances.
- Lord Dudley.
307
00:14:31,562 --> 00:14:34,021
And... Lady Jane?
308
00:14:34,021 --> 00:14:35,729
I wasn't expecting...
309
00:14:36,812 --> 00:14:39,062
...my future daughter-in-law. Welcome.
310
00:14:41,146 --> 00:14:42,396
{\an8}- [sheep bleating]
- [birds chirping]
311
00:14:42,396 --> 00:14:44,896
{\an8}As you can see, we're installing
312
00:14:44,896 --> 00:14:48,479
new tapestries for the nuptials,
straight from Firenze.
313
00:14:49,771 --> 00:14:55,187
Braised hog, peacock pie, jellied egret,
and my own favorite, roast dolphin.
314
00:14:55,187 --> 00:14:56,729
Oh, yum!
315
00:14:56,729 --> 00:15:00,062
Now, musical players--
how do we feel about the French?
316
00:15:00,062 --> 00:15:01,396
- Tepid.
- I know.
317
00:15:01,396 --> 00:15:02,479
Filthy beast-lovers.
318
00:15:02,479 --> 00:15:05,229
But the tunes. Hmm!
319
00:15:05,229 --> 00:15:08,771
I must say,
I'm enchanted to finally meet you.
320
00:15:08,771 --> 00:15:10,979
Everybody tells me
you're very, very clever.
321
00:15:10,979 --> 00:15:13,437
I think my mother
rather regrets my education.
322
00:15:13,437 --> 00:15:15,104
- That's absolute--
- I jest.
323
00:15:15,104 --> 00:15:16,229
[chuckles]
324
00:15:16,229 --> 00:15:20,187
My cousin, King Edward, and I
shared tutors as children.
325
00:15:20,187 --> 00:15:21,979
He's my oldest friend.
326
00:15:21,979 --> 00:15:24,896
Oh, kings don't have friends.
They have subjects.
327
00:15:24,896 --> 00:15:26,312
And counselors like moi.
328
00:15:26,312 --> 00:15:28,729
My Lord, I'm here to meet your son.
329
00:15:28,729 --> 00:15:31,562
I'm afraid Guildford isn't here.
He's out. He's busy doing things.
330
00:15:31,562 --> 00:15:33,812
Things?
331
00:15:33,812 --> 00:15:35,729
Drinking and/or fighting?
332
00:15:35,729 --> 00:15:38,771
Indisposed with a woman of fiscal virtue?
333
00:15:38,771 --> 00:15:40,354
Oh, yes, I know all about those--
334
00:15:40,354 --> 00:15:41,896
Nerves. [chuckles]
335
00:15:41,896 --> 00:15:43,937
I quite understand. It's a big day.
336
00:15:43,937 --> 00:15:47,312
Now, do you know my other son, Stan,
is also engaged?
337
00:15:47,312 --> 00:15:49,479
To a Bavarian princess.
338
00:15:49,479 --> 00:15:51,062
- Really?
- Oh, yes.
339
00:15:51,062 --> 00:15:53,104
- Is she very rich?
- Filthy.
340
00:15:53,104 --> 00:15:56,604
Terrible outbreak of the plague there at
the moment, so the wedding is postponed.
341
00:15:56,604 --> 00:15:59,479
But as I said to him,
if she can survive the plague,
342
00:15:59,479 --> 00:16:00,646
she can survive marriage.
343
00:16:00,646 --> 00:16:03,729
[prolonged laughter]
344
00:16:06,896 --> 00:16:08,729
Actually--
345
00:16:08,729 --> 00:16:11,021
Dudley and I have
a marriage contract to discuss.
346
00:16:11,021 --> 00:16:13,146
I would like to say something first.
347
00:16:13,146 --> 00:16:16,521
Again? By all means, my dear girl.
348
00:16:16,521 --> 00:16:18,979
I don't want to marry your son.
349
00:16:20,396 --> 00:16:23,437
Nobody cares what you want.
350
00:16:23,437 --> 00:16:26,271
Now, when you buy a tapestry,
you're not buying it for yourself.
351
00:16:26,271 --> 00:16:28,437
You're buying it for your descendants...
352
00:16:28,437 --> 00:16:31,021
[door slams]
353
00:16:32,021 --> 00:16:34,021
[dramatic music playing]
354
00:16:42,104 --> 00:16:43,396
[boy] Oi, mister!
355
00:16:43,396 --> 00:16:44,479
Spare some silver?
356
00:16:44,479 --> 00:16:46,479
- Children, you'd like a little coin?
Go on, then.
- [children shouting]
357
00:16:46,479 --> 00:16:47,979
Oh, I thought you wanted it?
358
00:16:47,979 --> 00:16:49,312
Jump higher. [warbles]
359
00:16:49,312 --> 00:16:51,146
Oh, jump higher. Go on--
360
00:16:51,146 --> 00:16:53,396
[shouts] You little shit!
361
00:16:55,021 --> 00:16:56,521
Stop that! Stop!
362
00:16:56,521 --> 00:16:58,437
How dare you hurt that child?
363
00:16:58,437 --> 00:17:01,729
- It accosted me.
- You were teasing him. I saw it.
364
00:17:01,729 --> 00:17:03,104
Poor little thing. Are you hurt?
365
00:17:03,104 --> 00:17:04,646
He's had worse.
366
00:17:05,729 --> 00:17:06,896
Give him those coins.
367
00:17:07,021 --> 00:17:08,229
No.
368
00:17:08,229 --> 00:17:10,312
Do it.
369
00:17:12,271 --> 00:17:13,896
Certainly. My Lady.
370
00:17:15,521 --> 00:17:18,187
- Oopsie.
- Really?
371
00:17:18,187 --> 00:17:20,937
I'm teaching him a lesson
about the evils of begging.
372
00:17:20,937 --> 00:17:22,937
Pox on you, fuckface.
373
00:17:24,979 --> 00:17:26,854
Watch out. They have fleas.
374
00:17:30,229 --> 00:17:32,021
Who is that man?
375
00:17:32,021 --> 00:17:34,437
Lord Dudley's son. He's a prat.
376
00:17:37,437 --> 00:17:40,604
That's Guildford Dudley?
377
00:17:40,604 --> 00:17:43,854
[Author] Jane knows
that marrying such a prat
378
00:17:43,854 --> 00:17:46,854
is inconfuckingceivable.
379
00:17:46,854 --> 00:17:48,562
Jane needs a miracle.
380
00:17:49,687 --> 00:17:54,062
And the only people
who can perform miracles are saints.
381
00:17:56,521 --> 00:17:58,479
And kings.
382
00:17:59,771 --> 00:18:02,229
[rousing music playing]
383
00:18:03,812 --> 00:18:07,562
King Edward took the throne
at nine years old
384
00:18:07,562 --> 00:18:11,896
after his father, King Henry,
finally kicked the royal bucket.
385
00:18:11,896 --> 00:18:17,229
Edward's life changed from spending
carefree days with his beloved cousin Jane
386
00:18:17,229 --> 00:18:20,479
to being told by bossy-boots counselors
387
00:18:20,479 --> 00:18:23,021
- how to rule his own bloody Kingdom.
- [coughs]
388
00:18:23,021 --> 00:18:24,979
[soldier shouts orders]
389
00:18:24,979 --> 00:18:30,312
Including, but not limited to,
reading poorly written proclamations
390
00:18:30,312 --> 00:18:32,812
targeting Ethians.
391
00:18:36,562 --> 00:18:39,021
[Lord Seymour] Is there a problem,
Your Majesty?
392
00:18:45,187 --> 00:18:46,187
M-My men...
393
00:18:50,479 --> 00:18:54,771
...I would that I could be
by your side on this day
394
00:18:54,771 --> 00:18:56,354
and that you would call me "friend."
395
00:18:56,354 --> 00:18:58,229
He's gone completely off-script.
396
00:18:58,229 --> 00:19:00,771
- Indeed, Lord Seymour.
- Get the chair.
397
00:19:00,771 --> 00:19:04,562
I'll never know the rush of combat
398
00:19:04,562 --> 00:19:08,146
or the joy of brotherhood-in-arms,
399
00:19:08,146 --> 00:19:13,937
but what I can give you
is my unending respect and gratitude
400
00:19:13,937 --> 00:19:15,604
for your bravery and valor,
401
00:19:15,604 --> 00:19:22,062
so that we may assure our people
they are safe in England forever.
402
00:19:22,062 --> 00:19:25,687
[soldiers] Hurrah! Hurrah! Hurrah!
403
00:19:30,271 --> 00:19:31,562
[Seymour] Your Majesty.
404
00:19:34,896 --> 00:19:36,229
Shall we?
405
00:19:38,146 --> 00:19:41,729
[sighs] Just wait until everyone's gone.
406
00:19:42,771 --> 00:19:44,687
[Edward] Who are those new soldiers
on the black horses?
407
00:19:44,687 --> 00:19:47,271
[Seymour] I told you, remember?
Kingsland Guards.
408
00:19:47,271 --> 00:19:50,812
An elite force to protect you
from the Ethian menace plaguing our land.
409
00:19:53,771 --> 00:19:55,854
First point of order. [clears throat]
410
00:19:55,854 --> 00:20:00,604
Beasts were caught sneaking into Grimsby.
411
00:20:00,604 --> 00:20:01,812
It was the Pack.
412
00:20:01,812 --> 00:20:03,937
- [crowd gasps]
- Yes, yes.
413
00:20:03,937 --> 00:20:07,437
The so-called Ethian Resistance.
414
00:20:07,437 --> 00:20:09,687
- [coughing]
- Beastly thugs
415
00:20:09,687 --> 00:20:12,562
and in clear violation of Division Law.
416
00:20:12,562 --> 00:20:17,271
No Ethian is permitted
in Verity cities, towns or properties
417
00:20:17,271 --> 00:20:19,521
under pain of death.
418
00:20:19,521 --> 00:20:21,729
- Sentenced to death?
- Of course. It's the law.
419
00:20:21,729 --> 00:20:24,771
But you told me there is
plenty of food for them in the wild.
420
00:20:24,771 --> 00:20:26,354
Why must they sneak into Grimsby?
421
00:20:26,354 --> 00:20:29,896
The mind boggles.
I mean, have you ever been to Grimsby?
422
00:20:29,896 --> 00:20:33,104
Don't kill them. Just put them
back in the woods or something.
423
00:20:35,729 --> 00:20:38,896
My cousin, Lady Jane Grey, is here.
424
00:20:38,896 --> 00:20:41,521
Dismissed, all of you. Out.
425
00:20:41,521 --> 00:20:43,437
[quiet chatter]
426
00:20:49,104 --> 00:20:50,104
Your Majesty.
427
00:20:50,104 --> 00:20:51,979
Stop it. [chuckles]
428
00:20:51,979 --> 00:20:53,104
How are you feeling?
429
00:20:53,104 --> 00:20:55,271
- How's the cold?
- It's fine.
430
00:20:55,271 --> 00:20:57,396
Ghastly, but it's fine, you know.
431
00:20:57,396 --> 00:20:59,979
Say hello to my new doggy, Petunia.
432
00:20:59,979 --> 00:21:02,812
- Hello, Petunia.
- She's a very devoted little thing.
433
00:21:02,812 --> 00:21:05,021
- Won't let me out of her sight.
- Oh, she's beautiful.
434
00:21:05,021 --> 00:21:07,521
Tell me, Janey, how are your sisters?
435
00:21:07,521 --> 00:21:09,437
Is Margaret still
pulling wings off butterflies?
436
00:21:10,521 --> 00:21:11,729
Shall we take some air?
437
00:21:13,187 --> 00:21:15,187
[wheelchair creaking]
438
00:21:17,062 --> 00:21:18,771
[barking]
439
00:21:18,771 --> 00:21:22,687
I have terrible news.
My mother's forcing me to marry.
440
00:21:22,687 --> 00:21:23,979
Will you intervene?
441
00:21:25,021 --> 00:21:26,646
Jane, I've already approved it.
442
00:21:27,937 --> 00:21:29,479
Oh.
443
00:21:29,479 --> 00:21:30,896
Why?
444
00:21:30,896 --> 00:21:34,521
Why would you ever approve my marriage
without my consent?
445
00:21:34,521 --> 00:21:37,396
Be logical. It is your duty
to protect your family.
446
00:21:37,396 --> 00:21:41,062
- I do not choose to marry.
- You think I chose this life?
447
00:21:41,062 --> 00:21:43,604
We're all born to certain roles.
448
00:21:43,604 --> 00:21:45,396
Our destiny is set.
449
00:21:45,396 --> 00:21:47,062
Anyway, what else would you possibly do?
450
00:21:47,062 --> 00:21:49,146
I do not want to be a wife.
451
00:21:49,146 --> 00:21:51,937
- Just some man's property.
- Well, I do not want to be a dying King,
452
00:21:51,937 --> 00:21:53,021
but here we are.
453
00:21:53,021 --> 00:21:54,604
- You're not dying.
- [coughing]
454
00:21:56,479 --> 00:21:57,854
Are you?
455
00:22:01,646 --> 00:22:03,021
I have the Affliction.
456
00:22:04,396 --> 00:22:06,604
Do you think I'll be the first to recover?
457
00:22:09,229 --> 00:22:11,396
The Kingdom is in chaos.
458
00:22:12,437 --> 00:22:15,187
- I'm doing my best, but soon I'll be gone.
- No.
459
00:22:15,187 --> 00:22:16,979
No, don't say that.
460
00:22:17,979 --> 00:22:20,021
This is the real world.
461
00:22:21,229 --> 00:22:24,354
Kings die. Noblewomen marry.
462
00:22:26,479 --> 00:22:32,146
{\an8}Now, as to the chap in question,
he cannot be that bad.
463
00:22:33,521 --> 00:22:36,021
His pater is one of my counselors.
464
00:22:36,021 --> 00:22:39,312
You'll quickly improve him
the way that you improved me.
465
00:22:40,771 --> 00:22:43,312
Did I need improving, though?
That is the question.
466
00:22:43,312 --> 00:22:45,021
[Edward chuckles]
467
00:22:48,396 --> 00:22:52,854
I always thought
marriage sounded rather fun.
468
00:22:52,854 --> 00:22:56,812
A partner, a friend.
469
00:22:56,812 --> 00:22:58,354
Someone to make you laugh.
470
00:22:58,354 --> 00:23:01,396
Tell you that you're not alone.
471
00:23:01,396 --> 00:23:05,604
I always thought I'd only marry
if I could choose the man myself.
472
00:23:05,604 --> 00:23:06,979
Janey.
473
00:23:08,354 --> 00:23:09,354
That's just silly.
474
00:23:13,854 --> 00:23:16,229
[Author] Princess Mary
and Princess Elizabeth--
475
00:23:16,229 --> 00:23:18,771
Bess, for short--
are the discarded offspring
476
00:23:18,771 --> 00:23:22,604
of two of King Henry's
most unfortunate wives.
477
00:23:22,604 --> 00:23:26,354
Their brother, Edward, is youngest
but the first to get the crown
478
00:23:26,354 --> 00:23:27,729
- because of...
- Chop, chop, Bess.
479
00:23:27,729 --> 00:23:29,437
...you know, his penis.
480
00:23:29,437 --> 00:23:31,146
[knocking]
481
00:23:32,729 --> 00:23:34,229
Your Royal Highnesses.
482
00:23:34,229 --> 00:23:35,479
Where's our brother?
483
00:23:35,479 --> 00:23:37,771
He's in the gardens.
484
00:23:37,771 --> 00:23:39,896
Perambulating with Lady Jane Grey.
485
00:23:40,979 --> 00:23:42,437
Lady Jane Grey?
486
00:23:44,021 --> 00:23:46,021
[upbeat music playing]
487
00:23:48,604 --> 00:23:49,896
[arrow thuds in target]
488
00:23:54,521 --> 00:23:55,979
Sisters. [coughing]
489
00:23:57,729 --> 00:23:59,187
Your Majesty!
490
00:24:00,562 --> 00:24:01,854
Eddiekins!
491
00:24:01,854 --> 00:24:03,604
Seymour, pie.
492
00:24:03,604 --> 00:24:07,187
- Oh, you look terrible.
- I don't think I look that bad, actually.
493
00:24:07,187 --> 00:24:09,437
Hello, brother. Cousin Jane.
494
00:24:09,437 --> 00:24:11,021
Your Highnesses, it's a pleasure.
495
00:24:11,021 --> 00:24:12,104
Sweet Bess.
496
00:24:12,104 --> 00:24:14,646
- Jane and I, we were having some--
- [Mary] Blackberry pie.
497
00:24:14,646 --> 00:24:16,021
Your favorite.
498
00:24:17,729 --> 00:24:20,437
- Hmm?
- Mary, thank you.
499
00:24:20,437 --> 00:24:23,562
[coughing]
500
00:24:23,562 --> 00:24:24,979
How awful, brother.
501
00:24:24,979 --> 00:24:27,271
The Affliction is such
a dreadful way to die.
502
00:24:27,271 --> 00:24:30,312
You cough and cough
until you cough your lungs right out.
503
00:24:30,312 --> 00:24:31,771
- [hacking]
- [Jane] Edward?
504
00:24:32,979 --> 00:24:35,021
- [Mary] Brother?
- [Seymour] Your Majesty?
505
00:24:35,021 --> 00:24:36,521
Edward?
506
00:24:36,521 --> 00:24:37,771
[choking] Janey.
507
00:24:37,771 --> 00:24:39,729
He can't breathe. It's the Affliction.
508
00:24:39,729 --> 00:24:41,271
Guards, fetch Dr. Butts!
509
00:24:41,271 --> 00:24:44,604
We need pulmonaria. Uh, lungwort.
510
00:24:44,604 --> 00:24:47,229
The lilac flower planted over there.
Please!
511
00:24:48,187 --> 00:24:49,896
Look at me. Hurry!
512
00:24:49,896 --> 00:24:51,062
[dramatic music playing]
513
00:24:51,062 --> 00:24:52,812
[choking continues]
514
00:25:01,771 --> 00:25:02,979
Breathe.
515
00:25:05,312 --> 00:25:06,354
[gasps]
516
00:25:06,354 --> 00:25:07,979
[panting]
517
00:25:09,979 --> 00:25:12,104
- Jane saved the King's life.
- Jane saved the King's life.
518
00:25:12,104 --> 00:25:13,604
Jane saved the King's life.
519
00:25:13,604 --> 00:25:15,729
- I'm here!
- [Seymour] Ah, Dr. Butts.
520
00:25:15,729 --> 00:25:16,854
I am here.
521
00:25:16,854 --> 00:25:20,104
I am-- [panting]
522
00:25:21,312 --> 00:25:24,771
Another attack.
Oh, dear me. I forgot my forceps.
523
00:25:26,854 --> 00:25:29,479
You may wish to avert your eyes.
524
00:25:29,479 --> 00:25:31,062
I'm going in.
525
00:25:36,021 --> 00:25:37,979
[Seymour] That was exciting, wasn't it?
526
00:25:37,979 --> 00:25:39,271
[Jane] Exciting?
527
00:25:39,271 --> 00:25:40,854
{\an8}I can't leave Edward like this.
528
00:25:40,854 --> 00:25:44,396
{\an8}Will you check if your medic has elfdock?
It's a herb.
529
00:25:44,396 --> 00:25:47,229
{\an8}His Majesty enjoys
the finest medical care in the Kingdom.
530
00:25:47,229 --> 00:25:48,354
{\an8}Ta-ta.
531
00:25:49,771 --> 00:25:51,521
[horses neigh]
532
00:25:52,812 --> 00:25:54,812
[lively music playing]
533
00:26:01,354 --> 00:26:03,312
{\an8}- [Butts] Might I venture a...
- [slurps]
534
00:26:03,312 --> 00:26:05,854
...suggestion, Your Highness?
535
00:26:05,854 --> 00:26:08,062
Boiled kitten tea with urine.
536
00:26:09,896 --> 00:26:12,604
An old man's urine, ideally.
537
00:26:12,604 --> 00:26:14,854
[Charles] Oh, lovely. Lovely.
538
00:26:14,854 --> 00:26:17,062
No kitten tea. Thank you.
539
00:26:19,562 --> 00:26:21,521
Your Majesty, I only just heard.
540
00:26:21,521 --> 00:26:23,021
Oh, finally he turns up.
541
00:26:23,021 --> 00:26:25,521
- Where is Jane?
- Why, I sent her home.
542
00:26:25,521 --> 00:26:27,562
[coughing]
543
00:26:27,562 --> 00:26:31,104
I think the time has come
to appoint your successor.
544
00:26:31,104 --> 00:26:33,104
I know.
545
00:26:33,104 --> 00:26:34,562
I'm not afraid of death.
546
00:26:34,562 --> 00:26:36,896
[coughs] Well, that's not true.
I'm petrified.
547
00:26:36,896 --> 00:26:38,687
You have the strength of a thousand lions.
548
00:26:38,687 --> 00:26:42,896
Your Majesty, it is incumbent upon me
as Lord Protector to confirm
549
00:26:42,896 --> 00:26:46,521
that your eldest sister, Mary, is indeed
the rightful heir to the throne
550
00:26:46,521 --> 00:26:49,021
and the only choice
to keep our Kingdom safe
551
00:26:49,021 --> 00:26:52,771
from the rampaging hordes
of satanic beasts.
552
00:26:52,771 --> 00:26:54,604
Must you be so dramatic?
553
00:26:56,187 --> 00:26:58,354
The entire Kingdom agrees.
554
00:26:58,354 --> 00:27:00,562
I do not agree.
555
00:27:00,562 --> 00:27:03,521
Let's just take a beat for a moment
and think about this.
556
00:27:03,521 --> 00:27:07,437
Now, Princess Mary's mother, Catherine,
557
00:27:07,437 --> 00:27:11,062
was originally married
to your father's brother, Arthur,
558
00:27:11,062 --> 00:27:13,021
the heir apparent.
559
00:27:13,021 --> 00:27:14,354
Remember that old chestnut?
560
00:27:14,354 --> 00:27:20,437
Now, when Artie died,
of course, she claimed non-consummation,
561
00:27:20,437 --> 00:27:23,062
so that she could declare virgo intacta,
562
00:27:23,062 --> 00:27:25,562
get an annulment and marry the new King.
563
00:27:25,562 --> 00:27:27,937
But, I mean, come on, who are we kidding?
564
00:27:27,937 --> 00:27:30,604
Spaniards? Th-th-th-th-th...
565
00:27:30,604 --> 00:27:31,812
- [chuckles]
- Mm.
566
00:27:31,812 --> 00:27:34,812
And anyway,
Henry went on to divorce Catherine.
567
00:27:34,812 --> 00:27:38,521
So, is Mary's claim even legally valid?
568
00:27:38,521 --> 00:27:41,729
Do you see?
[whispering] Technically, she's a bastard.
569
00:27:41,729 --> 00:27:44,104
Now, what about Princess Bess?
570
00:27:44,104 --> 00:27:46,937
Her mother was an Ethian.
The people would never accept it.
571
00:27:46,937 --> 00:27:48,646
[Dudley] You're absolutely right...
572
00:27:49,396 --> 00:27:50,604
Seymour.
573
00:27:50,604 --> 00:27:53,187
Now, what if there was somebody else?
574
00:27:53,187 --> 00:27:56,437
Someone with direct royal lineage,
575
00:27:56,437 --> 00:28:00,146
perhaps engaged to a highborn Verity.
576
00:28:00,146 --> 00:28:03,062
Someone who could,
oh, I don't know, golly,
577
00:28:03,062 --> 00:28:07,937
wear the crown until such time
as they could produce a son.
578
00:28:07,937 --> 00:28:09,062
Lady Jane.
579
00:28:09,062 --> 00:28:11,479
Lady Jane Grey? Your cousin?
580
00:28:11,479 --> 00:28:13,396
[gasps] What a marvelous idea.
581
00:28:13,396 --> 00:28:15,979
Queen Jane? It's a terrible idea.
582
00:28:15,979 --> 00:28:18,854
Well, it's His Royal Highness's idea.
Are you saying it's terrible?
583
00:28:18,854 --> 00:28:21,229
- [clears throat]
- [Edward] She's a girl.
584
00:28:21,229 --> 00:28:22,729
Girls can't rule.
585
00:28:22,729 --> 00:28:26,396
Jane can rule, with our help,
until such time as her son can be King.
586
00:28:26,396 --> 00:28:27,771
What a happy coincidence.
587
00:28:27,771 --> 00:28:31,146
- [chuckling]
- Jane's husband-to-be is your son.
588
00:28:31,146 --> 00:28:33,687
The future King would be his grandson.
589
00:28:33,687 --> 00:28:35,521
Oh, my, I hadn't thought of that.
590
00:28:35,521 --> 00:28:37,479
Queen Jane. That's absurd.
591
00:28:37,479 --> 00:28:39,854
- Has a ring to it, doesn't it?
- [Edward] Stop squabbling.
592
00:28:39,854 --> 00:28:41,687
I have made my choice.
593
00:28:41,687 --> 00:28:44,062
[coughing]
594
00:28:45,062 --> 00:28:47,021
Take my will to the Chancery
for safekeeping.
595
00:28:47,021 --> 00:28:50,979
You may only open this
in the event of my death, and not before.
596
00:28:50,979 --> 00:28:53,187
[coughing]
597
00:28:53,187 --> 00:28:55,854
[whimsical music playing]
598
00:28:59,271 --> 00:29:02,312
I say, do you think this will take you
very much longer?
599
00:29:02,312 --> 00:29:03,604
[groans]
600
00:29:03,604 --> 00:29:07,229
I shall take a horse.
I don't live very far.
601
00:29:07,229 --> 00:29:08,854
Lord Seymour wouldn't approve, My Lady.
602
00:29:08,854 --> 00:29:13,146
Well, he certainly wouldn't approve
of my catching my death in the cold,
603
00:29:13,146 --> 00:29:15,146
and neither would my cousin...
604
00:29:15,146 --> 00:29:16,896
the King?
605
00:29:17,979 --> 00:29:19,062
[sighs]
606
00:29:19,062 --> 00:29:22,979
Dudley, you swinish snake.
607
00:29:22,979 --> 00:29:24,979
A swine and a snake?
608
00:29:24,979 --> 00:29:26,187
This matter of succession.
609
00:29:26,187 --> 00:29:29,021
I bow to King Edward's wishes,
whatever they may be.
610
00:29:29,021 --> 00:29:31,562
May the devil take you, Dudley.
611
00:29:31,562 --> 00:29:35,021
You know, you really must calm down.
This level of anger-- it's simply toxic.
612
00:29:35,021 --> 00:29:37,854
- I can't!
- Breathe, my dear man.
613
00:29:37,854 --> 00:29:41,812
Let us hope he favors
the rightful inheritor in Princess Mary.
614
00:29:41,812 --> 00:29:43,271
If he names Lady Jane,
615
00:29:43,271 --> 00:29:46,229
I cannot be responsible
for what happens next.
616
00:29:46,229 --> 00:29:49,812
Of course you would not be responsible
for what happens next.
617
00:29:49,812 --> 00:29:52,437
You'd be superfluous.
618
00:29:52,437 --> 00:29:55,687
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I have a wedding to plan.
619
00:29:55,687 --> 00:29:57,604
[intriguing music playing]
620
00:30:01,312 --> 00:30:02,396
Lord Seymour.
621
00:30:02,396 --> 00:30:03,646
Give me that.
622
00:30:10,229 --> 00:30:12,187
Seymour, I've already made my choice.
623
00:30:12,187 --> 00:30:14,146
I need to rest.
624
00:30:14,146 --> 00:30:18,521
Your Majesty, you must eat.
Princess Mary's blackberry pie.
625
00:30:18,521 --> 00:30:20,812
She's a dote, isn't she?
Always looking after your health.
626
00:30:20,812 --> 00:30:22,562
- [barks]
- [Edward] Petunia!
627
00:30:22,562 --> 00:30:23,812
- [clattering]
- Guards!
628
00:30:24,854 --> 00:30:26,812
Take this mutt to the kennel and kill it.
629
00:30:26,812 --> 00:30:29,437
- No!
- You are weak in mind and body.
630
00:30:29,437 --> 00:30:30,729
This thing needs to be destroyed,
631
00:30:30,729 --> 00:30:32,271
and I shall take great pleasure
in doing it myself.
632
00:30:32,271 --> 00:30:36,437
- [barking, growling]
- Do not touch my dog.
633
00:30:37,896 --> 00:30:40,104
Dismissed.
634
00:30:40,104 --> 00:30:41,396
[barks]
635
00:30:43,854 --> 00:30:45,437
[owl hooting]
636
00:30:45,437 --> 00:30:48,854
[Author] For the first time
in Jane's entire life,
637
00:30:48,854 --> 00:30:51,479
no one knows where she is.
638
00:30:51,479 --> 00:30:53,771
She is alone and free.
639
00:30:53,771 --> 00:30:59,271
She can finally escape, ride north,
discover... no, create her destiny.
640
00:30:59,271 --> 00:31:00,937
[men shouting in distance]
641
00:31:00,937 --> 00:31:04,354
Wait a minute. What's that?
642
00:31:05,437 --> 00:31:10,812
Guards, a search party, clearly sent
by King Edward and/or her dratted mother
643
00:31:10,812 --> 00:31:12,229
to find her.
644
00:31:12,229 --> 00:31:15,104
But as they say in the classics,
645
00:31:15,104 --> 00:31:17,854
not today, Satan.
646
00:31:19,229 --> 00:31:22,896
Jane needs somewhere to hide,
like an empty woodsman's hut
647
00:31:22,896 --> 00:31:24,521
or a nice hay bale.
648
00:31:24,521 --> 00:31:27,896
Somewhere no one would ever think to look.
649
00:31:31,354 --> 00:31:32,896
- [horse neighs]
- [glass shatters]
650
00:31:32,896 --> 00:31:34,479
[♪ The Donnas: "I Didn't Like You Anyway"]
651
00:31:34,479 --> 00:31:36,562
[loud chatter]
652
00:31:43,687 --> 00:31:47,771
♪ You told me that it just couldn't be ♪
653
00:31:47,771 --> 00:31:50,979
♪ You don't wanna go out with me ♪
654
00:31:50,979 --> 00:31:53,521
♪ No, I'm not sad, I don't even care... ♪
655
00:31:53,521 --> 00:31:55,354
- [grunts]
- Yeah! I win!
656
00:31:55,354 --> 00:31:57,604
- Cheated, you gobshite.
- Did not, you dumb fuck!
657
00:31:57,604 --> 00:32:00,062
- [groans]
- Piss off!
658
00:32:00,062 --> 00:32:02,562
I say, whoa, whoa, whoa!
Do you mind if I interrupt?
659
00:32:04,479 --> 00:32:06,729
Arm wrestling is an ancient art.
660
00:32:09,104 --> 00:32:10,521
The winner must be humble.
661
00:32:10,521 --> 00:32:12,104
And the loser gracious.
662
00:32:12,104 --> 00:32:14,937
- Go shag a beast, ya posh wanker.
- Yeah, fuck off.
663
00:32:14,937 --> 00:32:16,229
Very well.
664
00:32:16,229 --> 00:32:17,771
Off I shall fuck.
665
00:32:20,271 --> 00:32:23,187
- And now we're gonna gut ya.
- [young man] Gut me with what?
666
00:32:26,271 --> 00:32:27,521
Are you looking for these?
667
00:32:27,521 --> 00:32:28,854
[intriguing music playing]
668
00:32:30,271 --> 00:32:31,437
[laughter]
669
00:32:34,646 --> 00:32:36,187
[crowd cheers]
670
00:32:37,437 --> 00:32:39,687
[crowd cheers]
671
00:32:39,687 --> 00:32:44,312
And now I have your attention,
shall I torture you with a poem?
672
00:32:44,312 --> 00:32:46,104
[crowd] Yes!
673
00:32:46,104 --> 00:32:47,271
[together] No.
674
00:32:47,271 --> 00:32:48,354
Too late.
675
00:32:49,854 --> 00:32:52,354
[speaking Latin] I have decided
to die in a tavern.
676
00:32:52,812 --> 00:32:55,896
Where the wine will be close
to my dying...
677
00:32:56,271 --> 00:32:57,771
[crowd, speaking Latin] ...mouth!
678
00:32:57,771 --> 00:32:59,479
[young man] Thank you!
679
00:32:59,479 --> 00:33:02,562
- And drink! Please, come on.
- [crowd cheering]
680
00:33:05,687 --> 00:33:07,687
[sultry rock music playing]
681
00:33:18,312 --> 00:33:20,687
[Author] Let us take a moment
to reassure our viewers
682
00:33:20,687 --> 00:33:24,979
that there is no such thing
as love at first sight.
683
00:33:24,979 --> 00:33:27,729
But lust at first sight?
684
00:33:29,271 --> 00:33:32,771
Oh, yes. Totally a thing.
685
00:33:32,771 --> 00:33:36,396
So, do you... come here often?
686
00:33:36,396 --> 00:33:41,062
[Author] Jane is the first person
in history to ever use that line,
687
00:33:41,062 --> 00:33:44,521
and two seconds later,
the first to regret it.
688
00:33:44,521 --> 00:33:46,062
[burps]
689
00:33:46,062 --> 00:33:47,146
Wow.
690
00:33:47,146 --> 00:33:48,521
Oops.
691
00:33:48,521 --> 00:33:49,812
That's your response?
692
00:33:49,812 --> 00:33:53,062
So you can recite the Archpoet standing
on a table in a dirt-floor tavern,
693
00:33:53,062 --> 00:33:55,479
- but you can't muster a simple apology?
- I said, "Oops."
694
00:33:55,479 --> 00:33:58,187
You mispronounced "vina," by the way.
695
00:33:58,187 --> 00:33:59,896
"Vee-na."
696
00:33:59,896 --> 00:34:02,271
Where'd you learn your Latin?
In a ditch?
697
00:34:02,271 --> 00:34:04,521
- Who would teach Latin in a ditch?
- Oh, you're missing the point.
698
00:34:04,521 --> 00:34:06,312
- The point being?
- Your mediocre Latin
699
00:34:06,312 --> 00:34:09,521
- and disappointing table manners.
- Are we at a table? No.
700
00:34:09,521 --> 00:34:11,437
Again, missing the point.
701
00:34:11,437 --> 00:34:13,687
Has anybody ever told you
that you're an insufferable pedant?
702
00:34:13,687 --> 00:34:15,854
Oh, where I come from,
pedantry is a virtue.
703
00:34:15,854 --> 00:34:17,854
Where I come from,
amiability trumps semantics.
704
00:34:17,854 --> 00:34:19,604
Amiability is for the meek.
705
00:34:19,604 --> 00:34:21,687
Amiability is for the amiable.
706
00:34:21,687 --> 00:34:23,604
You are the rudest man I have ever met.
707
00:34:23,604 --> 00:34:26,062
Well, the night is young. Mingle.
708
00:34:26,062 --> 00:34:27,646
Oh, I intend to.
709
00:34:28,812 --> 00:34:29,854
Good night.
710
00:34:29,854 --> 00:34:31,437
Wait.
711
00:34:31,437 --> 00:34:33,771
[lighthearted music playing]
712
00:34:33,771 --> 00:34:36,896
- Who are you?
- Who are you?
713
00:34:36,896 --> 00:34:38,646
[Archer] Excuse me.
714
00:34:38,646 --> 00:34:42,062
No. No. You lot can't be here.
715
00:34:42,062 --> 00:34:44,812
- We just came for a drink, mate.
- I don't want any trouble.
716
00:34:44,812 --> 00:34:47,521
He's asking you nicely.
717
00:34:47,521 --> 00:34:50,146
No trouble. You have my word.
718
00:34:50,146 --> 00:34:51,437
And I said no.
719
00:34:51,437 --> 00:34:52,812
Leave.
720
00:34:52,812 --> 00:34:54,896
[whispers] Why is he kicking them out?
721
00:34:54,896 --> 00:34:56,104
[door slams open]
722
00:34:56,104 --> 00:34:58,521
- Good evening!
- [crowd gasping, murmuring]
723
00:34:58,521 --> 00:35:00,271
[whispers] Come with me.
724
00:35:00,271 --> 00:35:01,687
- As if.
- What?
725
00:35:02,896 --> 00:35:03,896
Oh, shit.
726
00:35:03,896 --> 00:35:07,271
[guard] I said,
good evening, my good people.
727
00:35:07,271 --> 00:35:13,271
We have it on excellent authority
that a certain beast might be in here.
728
00:35:13,271 --> 00:35:14,937
Goes by the name of Archer.
729
00:35:17,021 --> 00:35:22,021
He's wanted for robbery, arson, sedition.
730
00:35:22,021 --> 00:35:23,437
[quietly] Sedition. That's a new one.
731
00:35:23,437 --> 00:35:25,354
[quietly] Well, I do try.
732
00:35:25,354 --> 00:35:27,021
[sniffs, spits]
733
00:35:27,979 --> 00:35:31,729
- [goblet bangs on table]
- Hunting scum makes me ever so thirsty.
734
00:35:33,479 --> 00:35:35,687
- [groans]
- [crowd gasping]
735
00:35:38,604 --> 00:35:40,521
Hand him over,
736
00:35:40,521 --> 00:35:45,062
or we dunk every last one of you.
737
00:35:48,396 --> 00:35:50,562
[quietly] What do you think?
You up for it?
738
00:35:50,562 --> 00:35:52,479
[quietly] Yeah, fuck it.
739
00:35:52,479 --> 00:35:56,062
Why don't you leave him alone,
you bunch of thugs?
740
00:35:57,437 --> 00:35:59,521
- I'm Archer.
- [crowd gasps]
741
00:36:00,521 --> 00:36:02,521
Then you're coming with me.
742
00:36:02,521 --> 00:36:04,021
[suspenseful music playing]
743
00:36:04,021 --> 00:36:06,354
- [roaring]
- [crowd screaming]
744
00:36:06,354 --> 00:36:07,479
Right, let's go.
745
00:36:08,521 --> 00:36:11,354
[roaring]
746
00:36:11,354 --> 00:36:12,521
[young man] Move!
747
00:36:17,187 --> 00:36:19,479
This door leads outside.
748
00:36:19,479 --> 00:36:21,021
- [guard] Kill that fucking bear!
- [people screaming]
749
00:36:21,021 --> 00:36:22,146
[growls]
750
00:36:28,021 --> 00:36:29,437
[groans]
751
00:36:30,437 --> 00:36:32,687
[barking]
752
00:36:33,729 --> 00:36:36,062
[roaring]
753
00:36:37,271 --> 00:36:40,271
This is madness.
I never knew things were like this.
754
00:36:40,271 --> 00:36:42,312
You've never seen a bear in a bar before?
755
00:36:43,312 --> 00:36:44,354
Take them all!
756
00:36:44,354 --> 00:36:45,479
[groans]
757
00:36:47,604 --> 00:36:48,771
[grunts]
758
00:36:51,396 --> 00:36:52,937
[screams]
759
00:36:56,479 --> 00:36:57,729
[groans]
760
00:36:57,729 --> 00:36:59,187
[hawk screeches]
761
00:37:00,229 --> 00:37:01,812
Hey.
762
00:37:01,812 --> 00:37:04,521
Hey, more guards are coming!
763
00:37:04,521 --> 00:37:05,687
Archer, Archer, they're here!
764
00:37:05,687 --> 00:37:07,521
Let's get out of here now!
765
00:37:07,521 --> 00:37:09,187
[Jane] Susannah!
766
00:37:09,187 --> 00:37:11,312
- Susannah?
- [Archer] Susannah, come on!
767
00:37:14,729 --> 00:37:17,979
[whispering] Last chance.
Come with me.
768
00:37:21,229 --> 00:37:22,979
No.
769
00:37:26,521 --> 00:37:29,271
- What are you doing here?
- What are you doing here?
770
00:37:29,271 --> 00:37:30,521
Susannah, come on! Let's go!
771
00:37:30,521 --> 00:37:32,646
- I'm so sorry.
- So am I.
772
00:37:33,521 --> 00:37:34,937
What have we here?
773
00:37:34,937 --> 00:37:36,396
- Beast or maiden?
- [together] Maiden.
774
00:37:36,396 --> 00:37:37,812
A Verity maiden in britches?
775
00:37:37,812 --> 00:37:39,729
- I don't think so.
- Susannah, go!
776
00:37:39,729 --> 00:37:41,979
[hawk chirps, screeches]
777
00:37:41,979 --> 00:37:44,021
Aiding and abetting Satan's spawn.
778
00:37:44,021 --> 00:37:45,354
That'll be exile for you.
779
00:37:45,354 --> 00:37:47,604
- Exile sounds fine, actually.
- Mm.
780
00:37:47,604 --> 00:37:49,271
How about a nice dunking instead?
781
00:37:49,271 --> 00:37:51,229
Take her away!
782
00:37:56,479 --> 00:37:57,479
[Edward] Eels.
783
00:37:59,979 --> 00:38:01,021
Yummy.
784
00:38:01,021 --> 00:38:03,521
[door creaks closed]
785
00:38:03,521 --> 00:38:05,312
- Shall we have a nibble?
- [barking]
786
00:38:08,896 --> 00:38:09,896
Your Majesty.
787
00:38:09,896 --> 00:38:11,104
[stammers] Ethian.
788
00:38:11,104 --> 00:38:14,021
Calm down and listen to me.
Your great-grandmother sent me here.
789
00:38:14,021 --> 00:38:15,646
Oh, you liar,
my great-grandmother is dead.
790
00:38:15,646 --> 00:38:17,646
- [coughing] Guards!
- Is she?
791
00:38:17,646 --> 00:38:19,562
{\an8}Then who gave me this?
792
00:38:22,229 --> 00:38:24,146
The Bietso Cross.
793
00:38:24,146 --> 00:38:25,646
She was buried with it.
794
00:38:25,646 --> 00:38:28,396
No, she wasn't. She's alive.
795
00:38:28,396 --> 00:38:32,146
And she sent me here because she suspected
that you do not have the Affliction.
796
00:38:32,146 --> 00:38:34,021
And she was right.
797
00:38:34,021 --> 00:38:36,729
You are being poisoned.
798
00:38:36,729 --> 00:38:38,229
I can smell it in your food.
799
00:38:38,229 --> 00:38:39,979
I know, it's a lot to process.
800
00:38:41,271 --> 00:38:43,062
No, no, that actually explains a lot.
801
00:38:43,062 --> 00:38:46,354
- We must go to her. Now.
- But who is poisoning me?
802
00:38:46,354 --> 00:38:49,271
I don't know.
But we need to get you out of here.
803
00:38:49,271 --> 00:38:50,646
I...
804
00:38:51,979 --> 00:38:54,354
Sorry, do you have something
that I can wear?
805
00:38:54,354 --> 00:38:57,312
We're not normally so starkers
when we change,
806
00:38:57,312 --> 00:38:59,146
but I was, because-- Oh.
807
00:38:59,146 --> 00:39:01,687
Do you know what? It's a long story.
I-I'll tell you about it some other time.
808
00:39:01,687 --> 00:39:03,896
- There's a robe just there.
- Cheers.
809
00:39:03,896 --> 00:39:08,021
[Author] At this moment,
Edward has two major revelations.
810
00:39:08,021 --> 00:39:10,521
One, the dog girl is telling the truth.
811
00:39:10,521 --> 00:39:15,771
And two, he is not interested
in women romantically.
812
00:39:15,771 --> 00:39:19,604
He always imagined girls look like men
without their clothes.
813
00:39:19,604 --> 00:39:24,271
Edward has led, let us remember,
a deeply sheltered life.
814
00:39:24,271 --> 00:39:29,271
Now, you get dressed,
and we will be off like a tart's knickers.
815
00:39:29,271 --> 00:39:31,979
- I'm not going anywhere with you.
- What? Why not?
816
00:39:31,979 --> 00:39:34,729
Well, until about five minutes ago,
you were a dog.
817
00:39:34,729 --> 00:39:37,604
And I'm the King,
and someone is trying to kill me.
818
00:39:37,604 --> 00:39:39,646
I must find them
and punish them, obviously.
819
00:39:39,646 --> 00:39:41,146
- But--
- I have spoken.
820
00:39:41,146 --> 00:39:42,979
Granny will be most vexed.
821
00:39:42,979 --> 00:39:44,896
[knocking on door]
822
00:39:44,896 --> 00:39:46,687
[Edward] Come in.
823
00:39:51,771 --> 00:39:53,771
Not hungry, Your Majesty?
824
00:39:54,771 --> 00:39:57,187
No. Take it away.
825
00:40:08,354 --> 00:40:10,104
[doors close]
826
00:40:10,104 --> 00:40:13,729
Dearest Petunia,
I think you might have saved my life.
827
00:40:13,729 --> 00:40:15,146
[barks]
828
00:40:15,146 --> 00:40:16,604
[door opens]
829
00:40:16,604 --> 00:40:17,896
Good evening, Your Majesty.
830
00:40:17,896 --> 00:40:19,979
[dramatic music playing]
831
00:40:24,521 --> 00:40:26,312
[moaning]
832
00:40:28,896 --> 00:40:30,437
How's my baby brother?
833
00:40:31,771 --> 00:40:34,271
Weaker than a Sicilian's virtue.
834
00:40:35,479 --> 00:40:37,646
- And his Will for Succession is--
- Done.
835
00:40:37,646 --> 00:40:38,979
[cries in joy]
836
00:40:38,979 --> 00:40:40,521
[shushes]
837
00:40:40,521 --> 00:40:42,687
However-- [grunts]
838
00:40:43,729 --> 00:40:45,604
However?
839
00:40:48,562 --> 00:40:49,937
Did something happen?
840
00:40:49,937 --> 00:40:51,854
- No.
- Tell me what happened.
841
00:40:51,854 --> 00:40:52,937
Nothing happened.
842
00:40:54,437 --> 00:40:56,937
You are the natural choice, pudding pie.
843
00:40:56,937 --> 00:41:01,604
The entire Kingdom wants you
and you alone to succeed him.
844
00:41:02,771 --> 00:41:04,396
I will be Queen.
845
00:41:05,979 --> 00:41:10,062
And I will cleanse England
of Satan's beasts.
846
00:41:10,062 --> 00:41:11,812
Hmm.
847
00:41:11,812 --> 00:41:16,271
And I will not have any nasty surprises.
848
00:41:18,146 --> 00:41:20,354
- [girl screams]
- [man cries out]
849
00:41:20,354 --> 00:41:22,521
[Author] Ah, yes. A dunking.
850
00:41:22,521 --> 00:41:26,354
Torture to force
a suspected Ethian to change.
851
00:41:27,479 --> 00:41:28,854
Or die.
852
00:41:28,854 --> 00:41:31,521
[water burbling]
853
00:41:31,521 --> 00:41:34,604
[crowd murmuring, shouting]
854
00:41:37,562 --> 00:41:39,396
[guard] Right! Who's next?
855
00:41:39,396 --> 00:41:40,896
- [water splashes]
- What about her?
856
00:41:40,896 --> 00:41:42,437
What?
857
00:41:42,437 --> 00:41:44,646
She helped one escape.
Might be a beast.
858
00:41:44,646 --> 00:41:46,021
No, I'm not Ethian.
859
00:41:46,021 --> 00:41:47,812
I'm-- No, I'm not-- Don't you--
860
00:41:47,812 --> 00:41:49,646
[screams] No! No!
861
00:41:49,646 --> 00:41:51,062
No! Please, please.
862
00:41:51,062 --> 00:41:52,354
I won't change! I'll drown!
863
00:41:52,354 --> 00:41:53,812
[grunts] You're hurting me!
864
00:41:53,812 --> 00:41:55,271
That's the point, love.
865
00:41:55,271 --> 00:41:56,937
- [Frances] Stop!
- [horse neighs]
866
00:41:59,062 --> 00:42:01,437
That is Lady Jane Grey,
867
00:42:01,437 --> 00:42:04,062
cousin to His Majesty King Edward,
868
00:42:04,062 --> 00:42:08,187
and I am ordering you
to cease drowning her immediately.
869
00:42:08,187 --> 00:42:09,562
[grunts]
870
00:42:14,562 --> 00:42:16,562
[horse neighs]
871
00:42:27,396 --> 00:42:29,687
I shall have those men flogged to death.
872
00:42:30,979 --> 00:42:35,604
[Author] It's as close as Frances
will ever get to saying "I love you."
873
00:42:36,771 --> 00:42:37,854
Mother, about the wedding.
874
00:42:40,771 --> 00:42:41,896
Please?
875
00:42:44,146 --> 00:42:46,354
Please don't make me marry him.
876
00:42:47,896 --> 00:42:49,896
I'll only say this once.
877
00:42:51,312 --> 00:42:56,229
If you don't marry
Guildford Dudley tomorrow,
878
00:42:56,229 --> 00:42:58,937
I shall be forced to marry
your sister Katherine
879
00:42:58,937 --> 00:43:00,479
to the Duke of Leicester,
880
00:43:00,479 --> 00:43:02,687
toe and all.
881
00:43:02,687 --> 00:43:03,812
You wouldn't.
882
00:43:03,812 --> 00:43:05,521
Try me.
883
00:43:13,021 --> 00:43:15,021
[gentle music playing]
884
00:43:18,812 --> 00:43:23,312
[Author] If only Jane could think of
another way out of her unwanted wedding.
885
00:43:23,312 --> 00:43:27,062
But her thoughts keep drifting back
to the tavern
886
00:43:27,062 --> 00:43:31,146
and that intriguing
yet infuriating young man.
887
00:43:31,146 --> 00:43:34,937
Not spending more time with intriguing
yet infuriating young men in taverns
888
00:43:34,937 --> 00:43:38,062
was one of the chief injustices
of Jane's life.
889
00:43:38,062 --> 00:43:41,312
Her existence would be all injustice now.
890
00:43:41,312 --> 00:43:44,271
Marriage, motherhood, death.
891
00:43:44,271 --> 00:43:48,437
In quick succession,
if statistics are anything to go by.
892
00:43:48,437 --> 00:43:51,312
Die, kitty, die! Beg for your life! Ha!
893
00:43:51,312 --> 00:43:52,437
Margaret, get out.
894
00:43:52,437 --> 00:43:55,854
You know the servants hate it when
you get your fake blood on everything.
895
00:44:03,479 --> 00:44:07,187
Wait, come back. Margaret, come back.
896
00:44:07,187 --> 00:44:10,271
[♪ Alice Merton: "Vertigo"]
897
00:44:12,771 --> 00:44:15,729
♪ Hands are sweaty, my heart beats heavy ♪
898
00:44:15,729 --> 00:44:19,437
♪ There's something out there,
I swear, I'm not ready ♪
899
00:44:19,437 --> 00:44:23,729
♪ And I don't really know
where to go from here ♪
900
00:44:26,437 --> 00:44:30,062
♪ The sound's getting louder,
the floor starts shaking ♪
901
00:44:30,062 --> 00:44:32,146
♪ Everybody's feeling it ♪
902
00:44:32,146 --> 00:44:34,604
♪ Why can't I feel it, no? ♪
903
00:44:36,396 --> 00:44:37,771
Leave them wanting less.
904
00:44:37,771 --> 00:44:39,854
- ♪ Oh ♪
- [vocalizing]
905
00:44:43,354 --> 00:44:44,771
{\an8}As you requested.
906
00:44:44,771 --> 00:44:46,771
{\an8}♪ All I can feel is ♪
907
00:44:46,771 --> 00:44:48,854
[vocalizing]
908
00:44:53,896 --> 00:44:57,437
♪ All I can feel is, feel is ♪
909
00:44:57,437 --> 00:45:01,062
♪ All I can feel is vertigo ♪
910
00:45:01,062 --> 00:45:02,771
What?
911
00:45:02,771 --> 00:45:04,854
You'll do, I suppose.
912
00:45:05,937 --> 00:45:07,646
♪ Feet still hurting ♪
913
00:45:07,646 --> 00:45:10,896
♪ I think I lost sight of
where I was going ♪
914
00:45:10,896 --> 00:45:16,062
♪ And I don't really know
where to go from here ♪
915
00:45:16,062 --> 00:45:22,021
♪ 'Cause all I can feel is vertigo ♪
916
00:45:22,021 --> 00:45:24,562
♪ Gotta get outta my head,
do something that I'll regret ♪
917
00:45:24,562 --> 00:45:26,812
♪ He's dancing now with someone he met ♪
918
00:45:26,812 --> 00:45:29,021
♪ Losing my sanity,
get rid of my vanity ♪
919
00:45:29,021 --> 00:45:32,271
♪ All I can feel is, feel is ♪
920
00:45:32,271 --> 00:45:36,604
♪ All I can feel is vertigo ♪
921
00:45:36,604 --> 00:45:39,979
♪ Caught inside of ♪
922
00:45:39,979 --> 00:45:44,021
♪ A dark night out ♪
923
00:45:44,021 --> 00:45:46,896
♪ Left me standing ♪
924
00:45:46,896 --> 00:45:51,312
- [song distorts and stops]
- ♪ By myself ♪
925
00:45:53,354 --> 00:45:55,312
[Author] Oh, yes.
926
00:45:55,312 --> 00:45:58,437
Frequenter of taverns, seeker of trouble,
927
00:45:58,437 --> 00:46:01,312
son of Lord Dudley and lust object
928
00:46:01,312 --> 00:46:03,937
of one Lady Jane Grey.
929
00:46:03,937 --> 00:46:07,062
May I present Jane's husband-to-be,
930
00:46:07,062 --> 00:46:11,687
Lord Guildford Dudley.
931
00:46:11,687 --> 00:46:15,104
[Bishop] Dearly beloved,
we are gathered here today
932
00:46:15,104 --> 00:46:16,604
to witness the joining
933
00:46:16,604 --> 00:46:21,896
of Lady Jane Grey
and Lord Guildford Dudley
934
00:46:21,896 --> 00:46:25,979
in the sacred blessing of holy matrimony.
935
00:46:25,979 --> 00:46:27,854
Lord Guildford Dudley.
936
00:46:29,146 --> 00:46:30,146
What?
937
00:46:31,437 --> 00:46:33,271
Oh, um...
938
00:46:37,354 --> 00:46:39,521
I, Guildford,
939
00:46:39,521 --> 00:46:41,854
take thee,
940
00:46:41,854 --> 00:46:44,312
Jane,
941
00:46:44,312 --> 00:46:45,937
to be my...
942
00:46:48,396 --> 00:46:50,187
my...
943
00:46:55,312 --> 00:46:56,896
...my wedded wife.
944
00:46:58,187 --> 00:47:00,312
To have and to hold
945
00:47:00,312 --> 00:47:02,396
from this day forward.
946
00:47:03,937 --> 00:47:05,896
I plight thee my troth.
947
00:47:05,896 --> 00:47:08,479
[Bishop] And Lady Jane Grey.
948
00:47:08,479 --> 00:47:10,562
[gentle music playing]
949
00:47:12,646 --> 00:47:15,854
I... Jane...
950
00:47:17,229 --> 00:47:19,437
[quietly] You got a little... something.
951
00:47:21,021 --> 00:47:22,062
[grunts softly]
952
00:47:25,437 --> 00:47:27,562
[coughs]
953
00:47:34,812 --> 00:47:37,271
[church bells ringing]
954
00:47:40,396 --> 00:47:41,854
[sighs]
955
00:47:43,312 --> 00:47:45,354
[crowd gasping, murmuring]
956
00:47:45,354 --> 00:47:47,979
- Jane.
- It's the Affliction!
957
00:47:47,979 --> 00:47:50,062
[coughing]
958
00:47:50,062 --> 00:47:51,521
Your Majesty.
959
00:47:51,521 --> 00:47:52,937
Fetch Dr. Butts.
960
00:47:52,937 --> 00:47:56,021
[♪ Tegan and Sara: "Rebel Rebel"]
961
00:48:01,937 --> 00:48:05,312
{\an8}♪ Doo, doo, doo, doo-doo, doo-doo-doo ♪
962
00:48:05,312 --> 00:48:08,896
{\an8}♪ Doo, doo, doo,
doo-doo, doo-doo-doo ♪
963
00:48:08,896 --> 00:48:11,521
{\an8}- ♪ Doo, doo, doo, doo-doo, doo-doo-doo ♪
- [song fades]
964
00:48:11,521 --> 00:48:12,729
[lively orchestral music playing]
965
00:48:12,729 --> 00:48:13,896
[Author] Well, well, well.
966
00:48:13,896 --> 00:48:15,771
So many questions.
967
00:48:15,771 --> 00:48:19,229
Will Jane marry
the notorious Guildford Dudley?
968
00:48:19,229 --> 00:48:24,146
Will King Edward be murdered
by his deranged sister Mary?
969
00:48:24,146 --> 00:48:25,521
I will be Queen.
970
00:48:25,521 --> 00:48:29,146
- [Author] Will Susannah survive in exile?
- [bear roars]
971
00:48:29,146 --> 00:48:32,604
You'll find out,
because our story has only just begun.
972
00:48:32,604 --> 00:48:34,062
Tell me everything.
973
00:48:35,104 --> 00:48:37,937
[Author] And once Jane is stuck
in her insufferable marriage...
974
00:48:37,937 --> 00:48:39,687
- I'm your Lord husband!
- Ha!
975
00:48:39,687 --> 00:48:41,479
[Author] ...to the most infuriating...
976
00:48:41,479 --> 00:48:42,896
- I'll need a dagger.
- That's not a dagger.
977
00:48:42,896 --> 00:48:44,646
This is a dagger.
978
00:48:44,646 --> 00:48:46,812
[Author] ...and attractive man
she's ever met...
979
00:48:46,812 --> 00:48:48,104
- [groans]
- [cries out]
980
00:48:51,104 --> 00:48:53,312
- ♪ Dear Mom, are you proud? ♪
- [♪ Andrew Michael Britton
& Lana McDonagh: "Famous Now"]
981
00:48:53,312 --> 00:48:56,104
[Author] ...and living in a world
fraught with danger...
982
00:48:56,104 --> 00:48:58,396
Somebody at Court is poisoning me.
983
00:48:58,396 --> 00:48:59,896
[Author] ...and division...
984
00:48:59,896 --> 00:49:01,604
The entire Kingdom is at stake.
985
00:49:01,604 --> 00:49:03,354
- [soldiers chant]
- [Author] ...she realizes perhaps
986
00:49:03,354 --> 00:49:05,104
she doesn't know everything, after all.
987
00:49:05,104 --> 00:49:06,187
Bollocks.
988
00:49:06,187 --> 00:49:08,979
[Author] Just when life can't get
any more complicated...
989
00:49:08,979 --> 00:49:11,729
My Lady, His Majesty is dead.
990
00:49:11,729 --> 00:49:12,812
[gasps]
991
00:49:12,812 --> 00:49:15,021
[Author] ...Jane is named
Queen of England.
992
00:49:15,021 --> 00:49:16,604
Nothing's more important
than the monarchy.
993
00:49:16,604 --> 00:49:18,146
- Quite.
- Quite.
994
00:49:18,146 --> 00:49:19,604
Quite.
995
00:49:20,271 --> 00:49:21,771
[screams]
996
00:49:22,854 --> 00:49:25,187
[Author] Now she's surrounded
by scoundrels,
997
00:49:25,187 --> 00:49:28,229
traitors, sycophants, reprobates, fools...
998
00:49:28,229 --> 00:49:30,771
- [yells]
- [grunts]
999
00:49:30,771 --> 00:49:32,396
- ...murderers...
- Have fun getting yourself killed.
1000
00:49:32,396 --> 00:49:33,479
I will, thank you.
1001
00:49:33,479 --> 00:49:36,187
...and worst of all, her mother.
1002
00:49:36,187 --> 00:49:37,354
To me!
1003
00:49:37,354 --> 00:49:39,187
I do rather fancy mummykins.
1004
00:49:40,062 --> 00:49:41,687
- [moaning]
- [chuckling]
1005
00:49:41,687 --> 00:49:45,396
[Author] Ready for an epic tale
of true love and high adventure?
1006
00:49:45,396 --> 00:49:46,896
[Jane] The country wants to change.
1007
00:49:46,896 --> 00:49:48,687
- I could heal England.
- [crowd cheering]
1008
00:49:49,229 --> 00:49:50,937
[people screaming]
1009
00:49:50,937 --> 00:49:52,271
Sounds to me like you're giving up.
1010
00:49:52,271 --> 00:49:54,562
Oh, I've never given up
on anything in my entire life.
1011
00:49:54,562 --> 00:49:55,687
- Really?
- Really.
1012
00:49:55,687 --> 00:49:56,771
Then prove it.
1013
00:49:57,937 --> 00:49:59,229
[Author] Of course you are.
1014
00:49:59,229 --> 00:50:00,396
Jane!
1015
00:50:00,396 --> 00:50:02,104
If you don't escape now, you'll die.
1016
00:50:02,104 --> 00:50:03,229
Fuck that.
1017
00:50:03,896 --> 00:50:05,729
[Author] Settle in, my darlings.
1018
00:50:05,729 --> 00:50:08,104
This is My Lady Jane.
1019
00:50:08,104 --> 00:50:09,479
Come. The Kingdom awaits.
1020
00:50:09,479 --> 00:50:11,937
- ♪ I'm famous now ♪
- [song ends]
1021
00:50:14,854 --> 00:50:17,854
{\an8}[♪ Tegan and Sara: "Rebel Rebel"]
1022
00:50:29,187 --> 00:50:32,729
{\an8}♪ Doo, doo, doo, doo-doo, doo-doo-doo ♪
1023
00:50:32,729 --> 00:50:36,229
{\an8}♪ Doo, doo, doo,
doo-doo, doo-doo-doo ♪
1024
00:50:36,229 --> 00:50:39,729
{\an8}♪ Doo, doo, doo, doo-doo, doo-doo-doo ♪
1025
00:50:43,104 --> 00:50:46,437
{\an8}♪ You've got your mother in a whirl ♪
1026
00:50:46,437 --> 00:50:50,271
{\an8}♪ She's not sure
if you're a boy or a girl ♪
1027
00:50:50,271 --> 00:50:53,812
{\an8}♪ Hey, babe, your hair's all right ♪
1028
00:50:53,812 --> 00:50:57,146
{\an8}♪ Hey, babe, let's go out tonight ♪
1029
00:50:57,146 --> 00:51:00,771
{\an8}♪ You like me, and I like it all ♪
1030
00:51:00,771 --> 00:51:04,229
{\an8}♪ We like dancing, and we look divine ♪
1031
00:51:04,229 --> 00:51:05,604
{\an8}♪ You love bands ♪
1032
00:51:05,604 --> 00:51:07,687
{\an8}♪ When they're playing hard ♪
1033
00:51:07,687 --> 00:51:11,229
{\an8}♪ You want more, and you want it fast ♪
1034
00:51:11,229 --> 00:51:14,854
{\an8}♪ They put you down, they say I'm wrong ♪
1035
00:51:14,854 --> 00:51:18,437
{\an8}♪ You tacky thing, you put them on ♪
1036
00:51:18,437 --> 00:51:22,062
{\an8}♪ Rebel Rebel, you've torn your dress ♪
1037
00:51:22,062 --> 00:51:25,562
{\an8}♪ Rebel Rebel, your face is a mess ♪
1038
00:51:25,562 --> 00:51:29,104
{\an8}♪ Rebel Rebel, how could they know? ♪
1039
00:51:29,104 --> 00:51:32,312
{\an8}♪ Hot tramp, I love you so ♪
1040
00:51:35,437 --> 00:51:36,771
{\an8}♪ Don't ya? ♪
1041
00:51:39,687 --> 00:51:43,271
{\an8}♪ Doo, doo, doo, doo-doo, doo-doo-doo ♪
1042
00:51:43,271 --> 00:51:45,229
{\an8}♪ Doo, doo, doo, doo-doo ♪
1043
00:51:45,229 --> 00:51:46,771
{\an8}♪ Doo-doo-doo ♪
1044
00:51:49,771 --> 00:51:51,396
{\an8}[song fades]
1045
00:51:51,396 --> 00:51:56,396
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1046
00:51:51,396 --> 00:52:01,396
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