Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,415 --> 00:00:04,211
[ Music playing,
pool balls thudding ]
2
00:00:06,213 --> 00:00:09,561
[ Sighs ] Man, I tell you,
Pops outdid himself
3
00:00:09,595 --> 00:00:11,287
when He created catfish.
4
00:00:11,321 --> 00:00:14,117
I mean, some people refer
to them as bottom-feeders,
5
00:00:14,152 --> 00:00:17,362
but I refer to them
as down-bottom delicacy.
6
00:00:17,396 --> 00:00:18,604
Mmm, mmm, mmm!
7
00:00:18,639 --> 00:00:21,607
Hey, all I know is
His arch rival Lucifer
8
00:00:21,642 --> 00:00:25,439
outdid hisself with this
"That Damn Devil" hot sauce.
9
00:00:25,473 --> 00:00:28,752
He -- he came up with this,
babe. Boom.
10
00:00:28,787 --> 00:00:31,410
You do know that's just
a company and a mascot, right?
11
00:00:31,445 --> 00:00:34,517
I mean, "That Damn Devil"
ain't makin' no hot sauce.
12
00:00:34,551 --> 00:00:37,382
It was made with plants created
by Pops on the fifth day.
13
00:00:37,416 --> 00:00:41,075
All I know is this is the most
delicious, hottest sauce ever.
14
00:00:41,110 --> 00:00:43,077
[ Laughs ]And you can't find it
everywhere.
15
00:00:43,112 --> 00:00:45,390
[ Laughs ] That's why a nigga
keeps his own bottle with him.
16
00:00:45,424 --> 00:00:46,391
[ Laughs ]
-Exclusive.
17
00:00:46,425 --> 00:00:48,289
Boy, is it.
18
00:00:50,533 --> 00:00:52,293
Hey, you notice Lloyd
been acting funny lately?
19
00:00:52,328 --> 00:00:55,607
Oh, he's just mad 'cause
he can't get drunk no more.
20
00:00:55,641 --> 00:00:57,436
I told him
it wasn't even on me.
21
00:00:57,471 --> 00:00:59,680
Over there mad-doggin'
and stuff.
22
00:00:59,714 --> 00:01:02,234
He know I still love his ass.
Ain't that right, Lloyd?
23
00:01:02,269 --> 00:01:04,892
Did my ex-Lord
and no-longer-my-savior
24
00:01:04,926 --> 00:01:07,136
say something?
25
00:01:07,170 --> 00:01:09,552
Oh! Boon! My P.O.
26
00:01:09,586 --> 00:01:11,278
You got Shalinka's keys?
27
00:01:11,312 --> 00:01:12,486
-Oh, yeah. I'm on it.
-Come on, come on!
28
00:01:12,520 --> 00:01:14,143
I got to go!
I got to go!
29
00:01:14,177 --> 00:01:16,421
Oh. Hold up.
30
00:01:21,564 --> 00:01:23,255
Hey. Where that Devil?
31
00:01:23,290 --> 00:01:25,430
I don't know. I think
you put it in your pocket.
32
00:01:25,464 --> 00:01:26,914
Probably fell out
them baggy-ass
33
00:01:26,948 --> 00:01:28,778
track pants you got on.
Heh, heh.
34
00:01:28,812 --> 00:01:31,746
Come on, Boon!
We gonna be late, dawg! Come on!
35
00:01:31,781 --> 00:01:33,852
Damn.
36
00:01:33,886 --> 00:01:36,165
Why you wearin'
track pants, anyway?
37
00:01:36,199 --> 00:01:38,615
That's for runnin' niggas,
not no damn wobblin'-ass niggas.
38
00:01:38,650 --> 00:01:40,721
Heh, heh, heh.
39
00:01:43,793 --> 00:01:46,796
[ Sniffs ]
40
00:01:46,830 --> 00:01:48,487
[ Smacking lips ]
41
00:01:48,522 --> 00:01:49,868
[ Slurps ] Mmm!
42
00:01:49,902 --> 00:01:52,698
Man. That Damn Devil
ain't shit.
43
00:01:54,321 --> 00:01:55,805
Ah. It's all right.
44
00:02:10,992 --> 00:02:22,211
♪♪
45
00:02:22,245 --> 00:02:24,661
[ Drawer opens ]
46
00:02:24,696 --> 00:02:27,664
I am here
to make a difference.
47
00:02:27,699 --> 00:02:29,321
To help people.
48
00:02:29,356 --> 00:02:30,736
I can make a difference.
49
00:02:30,771 --> 00:02:32,738
My job is a privilege,
50
00:02:32,773 --> 00:02:34,395
and I am so grateful
for my profession.
51
00:02:34,430 --> 00:02:37,433
People pray every day
to have a job like mine.
52
00:02:39,366 --> 00:02:40,712
Today's gonna be a good day.
53
00:02:40,746 --> 00:02:42,783
Man, you just
a punk-ass P.O.
54
00:02:42,817 --> 00:02:45,406
You violatin' me? Why?
55
00:02:45,441 --> 00:02:46,787
The assault charge.
56
00:02:46,821 --> 00:02:49,859
I know where you
and your boy band live, bitch.
57
00:02:49,893 --> 00:02:52,965
-Where do I live?
-112 North Roscoe.
58
00:02:53,000 --> 00:02:56,279
Okay, that's --
that's where I live.
59
00:02:56,314 --> 00:02:59,558
You tested positive for...
60
00:02:59,593 --> 00:03:01,250
everything.
61
00:03:02,043 --> 00:03:04,391
I...have...
62
00:03:04,425 --> 00:03:06,289
AIDS?
63
00:03:07,566 --> 00:03:09,534
I -- No.
Or I don't know.
64
00:03:09,568 --> 00:03:11,294
How did I get AIDS?!
65
00:03:11,329 --> 00:03:14,228
Fuck this list!
"Think positive" bullshit.
66
00:03:14,263 --> 00:03:16,575
Who the fuck decides
to be a parole office, anyway,
67
00:03:16,610 --> 00:03:17,887
you fucking nerd?
68
00:03:17,921 --> 00:03:19,475
You ain't even a real cop,
homey.
69
00:03:19,509 --> 00:03:23,444
Hope you choke on a bowl of
dicks and die, motherfucker.
70
00:03:23,479 --> 00:03:25,515
Okay. [ Voice breaking ] Well,
thank you for the feedback.
71
00:03:25,550 --> 00:03:27,655
Fuck you.
72
00:03:29,450 --> 00:03:31,038
Oh, God.
73
00:03:31,072 --> 00:03:33,040
Oh, Jesus.
74
00:03:33,074 --> 00:03:34,490
You called?
75
00:03:34,524 --> 00:03:37,251
Uh, no. I didn't.
Uh...
76
00:03:37,286 --> 00:03:39,564
Are you smoking?
No, um...never mind.
77
00:03:39,598 --> 00:03:40,910
Uh, please.
Please, take a seat.
78
00:03:40,944 --> 00:03:41,945
[ Sniffles ]
Um, Mister, uh...?
79
00:03:41,980 --> 00:03:44,396
Christ.
As in Jesus Christ.
80
00:03:44,431 --> 00:03:45,673
But you can call me Jee,
81
00:03:45,708 --> 00:03:47,572
big dawg in the robe,
the light supreme,
82
00:03:47,606 --> 00:03:51,645
Mister Turn-One-Fish-Into-5,000-
And-Feed-A-Whole-Family.
83
00:03:51,679 --> 00:03:53,440
It don't even matter
what you call me,
84
00:03:53,474 --> 00:03:55,787
just as long as you call me.
And you just did.
85
00:03:55,821 --> 00:03:57,754
What's happening, pimp?
86
00:03:57,789 --> 00:04:00,585
Well, gee...zus.
87
00:04:00,619 --> 00:04:02,414
Um...my name's Tyler.
88
00:04:02,449 --> 00:04:04,382
Praise be to you.
Um...
89
00:04:04,416 --> 00:04:06,349
Let me find your file.
-Hey, look, look.
90
00:04:06,384 --> 00:04:10,284
How about we put that on hold
and we talk about your file?
91
00:04:10,319 --> 00:04:11,941
My file?
92
00:04:13,805 --> 00:04:16,808
Man, I know somebody
got that shit, man.
93
00:04:16,842 --> 00:04:18,361
Nothing got turned in.
94
00:04:18,396 --> 00:04:20,018
That phone's not coming back,
Boonie.
95
00:04:20,052 --> 00:04:21,778
Damn.
I liked that phone, man.
96
00:04:21,813 --> 00:04:24,056
That was the Kuba Flip 4.
97
00:04:24,091 --> 00:04:26,714
I can't figure out nothing
after the Kuba Flip 4.
98
00:04:26,749 --> 00:04:29,959
Psh, eBay.
Here.
99
00:04:32,548 --> 00:04:34,619
Look.
100
00:04:34,653 --> 00:04:36,310
That's my phone!
101
00:04:36,345 --> 00:04:38,968
Oh, yeah. They got a bunch
of Kuba Flip 4's on here.
102
00:04:39,002 --> 00:04:42,005
Nah, look what I'm saying.
That's my actual phone.
103
00:04:42,040 --> 00:04:44,629
Look.
That's my wallpaper.
104
00:04:44,663 --> 00:04:46,596
Is that a bottle
of Darby?
105
00:04:46,631 --> 00:04:48,702
Lloyd!
106
00:04:48,736 --> 00:04:51,808
...and I keep reaching out,
but it --
107
00:04:51,843 --> 00:04:53,672
it feels like
no one's listening.
108
00:04:53,707 --> 00:04:56,641
Like this last guy, okay,
he wanted me to choke to death
109
00:04:56,675 --> 00:04:58,332
on a bowl of dicks.
110
00:04:58,367 --> 00:05:00,507
Some people need more
motivation, man.
111
00:05:00,541 --> 00:05:03,475
But at the end of the day,
all that counts
112
00:05:03,510 --> 00:05:04,925
is what's in your heart.
113
00:05:04,959 --> 00:05:07,824
And as long as that's right,
Pops is with you.
114
00:05:07,859 --> 00:05:10,413
He riding with you,
and he gonna lead your way.
115
00:05:10,448 --> 00:05:12,691
But, uh, [clears throat]
this New Compton Gardens,
116
00:05:12,726 --> 00:05:15,556
at this number, that's the best
place to reach you?
117
00:05:15,591 --> 00:05:17,006
That's the homeboy Boonie.
118
00:05:17,040 --> 00:05:19,422
Call that number any time.
I'm always with Boone.
119
00:05:19,457 --> 00:05:21,079
He know how
to get ahold of your boy.
120
00:05:21,113 --> 00:05:24,393
So, uh, Jesus has a son
named Boonie?
121
00:05:24,427 --> 00:05:26,981
No! [ Chuckles ]
No kids for Jesus.
122
00:05:27,016 --> 00:05:30,053
Naw,
Pops would kill me...again.
123
00:05:30,088 --> 00:05:33,367
And, for real, that wasn't
no fun the first time, pimp.
124
00:05:33,402 --> 00:05:36,888
How 'bout we just say this --
next time, fuck that kiosk.
125
00:05:36,922 --> 00:05:38,510
I'm just gonna come up in here
and holla at you.
126
00:05:38,545 --> 00:05:40,374
Cool?
127
00:05:40,409 --> 00:05:41,858
All right.
128
00:05:41,893 --> 00:05:43,688
-[ Chuckles ]
-[ Chuckles ]
129
00:05:43,722 --> 00:05:46,138
Ooh! Okay.
130
00:05:49,072 --> 00:05:50,798
Hey, Louis! What's up, pimp?
131
00:05:50,833 --> 00:05:52,869
Hey, you better get that
cholesterol down
132
00:05:52,904 --> 00:05:54,146
or you gonna die, dawg!
133
00:05:54,181 --> 00:05:56,977
[ Laughs ][ Siren wailing ]
134
00:05:57,011 --> 00:05:58,530
[ Heavenly music plays ]Damn, fool!
135
00:05:58,565 --> 00:06:00,187
-Huh?
-Hey fuck you!
136
00:06:00,221 --> 00:06:02,879
Christ lives matter,
motherfucker.
137
00:06:05,226 --> 00:06:17,756
♪♪
138
00:06:17,791 --> 00:06:30,217
♪♪
139
00:06:30,251 --> 00:06:33,116
♪♪
140
00:06:33,151 --> 00:06:35,533
[ Door closes ]
141
00:06:37,086 --> 00:06:38,570
Ohh, man.
142
00:06:38,605 --> 00:06:41,228
I shoulda known.
I shoulda known.
143
00:06:41,262 --> 00:06:44,507
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm,
mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
144
00:06:44,542 --> 00:06:45,922
Yep.
145
00:06:52,826 --> 00:06:55,173
[ Lock, bolt cutters clatter ]
146
00:06:55,207 --> 00:06:59,833
♪♪
147
00:06:59,867 --> 00:07:01,938
Oh, this fool here...
148
00:07:01,973 --> 00:07:04,113
He's stealing stuff!
149
00:07:04,147 --> 00:07:07,910
♪♪
150
00:07:07,944 --> 00:07:11,879
Man, what the hell?
151
00:07:11,914 --> 00:07:14,468
What's this? This...
152
00:07:16,505 --> 00:07:20,647
Oh, this motherfucker
This mother...
153
00:07:20,681 --> 00:07:21,958
[ Sighs ]
154
00:07:21,993 --> 00:07:24,651
♪ Get your hands up
155
00:07:24,685 --> 00:07:29,656
♪♪
156
00:07:29,690 --> 00:07:32,003
[ Chuckles ] Tyler!
157
00:07:32,037 --> 00:07:34,039
What's happening, pimp?
158
00:07:34,074 --> 00:07:36,145
I mean, that's a dedicated
P.O. right there,
159
00:07:36,179 --> 00:07:37,629
you know
what I'm talkin' about?
160
00:07:37,664 --> 00:07:40,045
The boy making house calls
and things.
161
00:07:40,080 --> 00:07:42,634
Hey, so to what do I owe
the honor, pimp?
162
00:07:42,669 --> 00:07:44,809
Uh, look...
163
00:07:44,843 --> 00:07:46,673
I believe you.
164
00:07:46,707 --> 00:07:47,984
What you talking about,
pimp?
165
00:07:48,019 --> 00:07:50,815
[ Sighs ]
I believe you're Jesus.
166
00:07:50,849 --> 00:07:51,988
I-I-I saw you get hit
by that car
167
00:07:52,023 --> 00:07:53,196
when you were leaving
the office.
168
00:07:53,231 --> 00:07:55,233
Oh, snap!
You saw that, huh?
169
00:07:55,267 --> 00:07:56,821
-Yeah.
-You saw that, right?
170
00:07:56,855 --> 00:07:58,305
-Yeah.
-Pops is dope, right?
171
00:07:58,339 --> 00:07:59,271
Yeah, I...
172
00:07:59,306 --> 00:08:01,066
Actually, I kind of feel
like this changes
173
00:08:01,101 --> 00:08:02,758
the course
of my life forever.
174
00:08:02,792 --> 00:08:04,518
It does, home-bolio!
175
00:08:04,553 --> 00:08:06,555
And your afterlife,
too, pimp.
176
00:08:06,589 --> 00:08:08,211
This here is cause
for celebration.
177
00:08:08,246 --> 00:08:09,316
Yeah, okay.
178
00:08:09,350 --> 00:08:11,663
Smoke yours, man.
You got some weed?
179
00:08:11,698 --> 00:08:14,701
Oh, no. Uh, not, uh --
not on me. I'm at work.
180
00:08:14,735 --> 00:08:16,772
-You got some cash?
-Yeah. Yeah, I got cash.
181
00:08:16,806 --> 00:08:17,807
Come on.
Let's get some weed.
182
00:08:17,842 --> 00:08:20,016
Uh, okay.
183
00:08:22,605 --> 00:08:25,608
Cassandra: Are you sure
this is all right?
184
00:08:25,643 --> 00:08:27,990
Like, just socializing
with your clients like this?
185
00:08:28,024 --> 00:08:29,543
[ Sighs ] Who knows?
186
00:08:29,578 --> 00:08:30,717
[ Giggles ]
187
00:08:30,751 --> 00:08:33,029
It's fine. Uh...
I don't know.
188
00:08:33,064 --> 00:08:36,205
I just...
I really want you to meet him.
189
00:08:36,239 --> 00:08:37,724
Okay.
190
00:08:37,758 --> 00:08:40,071
Okay. I just...
191
00:08:40,105 --> 00:08:43,281
I'm still wrapping
my head around this.
192
00:08:43,315 --> 00:08:46,940
But I love you,
and if it's important to you,
193
00:08:46,974 --> 00:08:48,942
then I want to explore
it with you.Thank you, sweetie.
194
00:08:48,976 --> 00:08:50,806
-Okay?
-Mm-hmm. Okay.
195
00:08:50,840 --> 00:08:53,153
[ Knock on door ]Oh. I'll get it.
196
00:08:56,018 --> 00:08:59,159
[ Chuckles ]
-Cassandra! So nice to --
197
00:08:59,193 --> 00:09:00,194
-Oh...
-Oh, okay.
198
00:09:00,229 --> 00:09:01,782
-So nice to meet you!
-Yeah.
199
00:09:01,817 --> 00:09:05,061
Well, I already know you,
'cause I am Jesus, you dig?
200
00:09:05,096 --> 00:09:06,580
Tyler, what's happening?
201
00:09:06,615 --> 00:09:09,100
I see you up in here
living like a boss, pimp.
202
00:09:09,134 --> 00:09:10,342
Come here. Give it to me.
-Okay.
203
00:09:10,377 --> 00:09:12,310
-Give it to me.
-Oh-kay! Oh, yeah.
204
00:09:12,344 --> 00:09:14,657
What's up?
How you been, playboy?
205
00:09:14,692 --> 00:09:15,900
I'm good. Right, hon?
206
00:09:15,934 --> 00:09:18,074
-Yeah.
-[ Gasps ]
207
00:09:18,109 --> 00:09:21,008
The Kuba people
of the Congo!
208
00:09:21,043 --> 00:09:22,734
That one is sweet.
209
00:09:22,769 --> 00:09:25,910
You got so many
dope African artifacts
210
00:09:25,944 --> 00:09:27,187
and souvenirs in here --
211
00:09:27,221 --> 00:09:28,671
Ooh, I really dig that
212
00:09:28,706 --> 00:09:30,777
from all your
travels to our Africa.
213
00:09:30,811 --> 00:09:33,711
'Cause I know you went down
there, and you fed the hungry,
214
00:09:33,745 --> 00:09:36,610
you dig, and you also helped
feed and clothe
215
00:09:36,645 --> 00:09:38,267
the homeless brothers
and sisters down there.
216
00:09:38,301 --> 00:09:40,821
I really appreciate that.
Girl, give me some.
217
00:09:40,856 --> 00:09:42,927
Give me some. Yeah, that's what
I'm talking about.
218
00:09:42,961 --> 00:09:44,998
And that's why I knew you
wouldn't trip if I brought
219
00:09:45,032 --> 00:09:46,344
one of my poor,
unfed partners with me
220
00:09:46,378 --> 00:09:48,208
to celebrate
this occasion with us.
221
00:09:48,242 --> 00:09:50,175
Tyler, Cassandra,
this is Boonie.
222
00:09:50,210 --> 00:09:52,350
Boonie, this is my parole
officer, Tyler,
223
00:09:52,384 --> 00:09:54,628
and his girl, Cassandra,
who's really into the
224
00:09:54,663 --> 00:09:57,044
whole Africa,
feed-the-world thing.
225
00:09:57,079 --> 00:09:59,150
Good lady.
-Anyway, hey. What's up.
226
00:09:59,184 --> 00:10:00,945
Can you point me
to the bathroom?
227
00:10:00,979 --> 00:10:02,981
'Cause I got to take
a shit real bad.
228
00:10:03,016 --> 00:10:05,743
I mean, I know we just met,
and I hate to walk right up
229
00:10:05,777 --> 00:10:08,124
into your house
and hit you with this bad news
230
00:10:08,159 --> 00:10:09,816
about tearing up
your bathroom,
231
00:10:09,850 --> 00:10:11,818
but you know how it is.
[ Chuckles ] You know.
232
00:10:11,852 --> 00:10:14,648
Unless Jesus can make the shit
go away for a couple of hours,
233
00:10:14,683 --> 00:10:16,270
then I don't have
to use they bathroom?
234
00:10:16,305 --> 00:10:18,445
[ Slurps, chewing loudly ]
235
00:10:18,479 --> 00:10:21,690
That's on Pops.
236
00:10:21,724 --> 00:10:24,727
Nope. [ Chuckles ]
I still got to shit.
237
00:10:28,110 --> 00:10:29,870
How long
has he been in there?
238
00:10:29,905 --> 00:10:32,355
Is he ever coming out?
239
00:10:32,390 --> 00:10:34,392
[ Toilet flushes ]Boonie's a big-ass man.
240
00:10:34,426 --> 00:10:36,463
I mean,
big man mean big turds.
241
00:10:36,497 --> 00:10:38,741
Plus, his diet
is all messed up.
242
00:10:38,776 --> 00:10:40,225
He been eating
a lot of fish sandwiches
243
00:10:40,260 --> 00:10:41,468
and gummy worms lately.
244
00:10:41,502 --> 00:10:43,056
That can't come out easy.
245
00:10:43,090 --> 00:10:44,713
[ Exhales deeply ]
Boy, hey.
246
00:10:44,747 --> 00:10:47,198
Well, y'all bathroom
like a damn resort.
247
00:10:47,232 --> 00:10:49,027
I couldn't just throw
these back on
248
00:10:49,062 --> 00:10:52,237
and contaminate a clean ass
with some dirty drawers.
249
00:10:52,272 --> 00:10:55,378
Can I -- Can I put these
in your washer? Ours is broke.
250
00:10:55,413 --> 00:10:59,106
[ African music playing ]
251
00:10:59,141 --> 00:11:02,247
Damn. Y'all got
a lot of African shit.
252
00:11:02,282 --> 00:11:04,284
Well, I lived in Nairobi
for two years,
253
00:11:04,318 --> 00:11:06,907
and I have such a strong
interest in the culture.
254
00:11:06,942 --> 00:11:09,427
So -- so we have
all this stuff. [ Laughs ]
255
00:11:09,461 --> 00:11:12,050
Hey, so tell me something --
Does Africa stink?
256
00:11:12,085 --> 00:11:15,709
[ Chuckles ] I'm just saying,
like, I always imagined Africa
257
00:11:15,744 --> 00:11:17,918
to be mustier
than a motherfucker.
258
00:11:17,953 --> 00:11:20,956
That is really offensive.
Africa is so beautiful.
259
00:11:20,990 --> 00:11:23,821
Oh, well, you know,
you can have it if you want it.
260
00:11:23,855 --> 00:11:25,270
Motherfucker like me,
I need some pavement
261
00:11:25,305 --> 00:11:26,824
to walk on
[chuckling] you know?
262
00:11:26,858 --> 00:11:29,205
I can't -- I can't fuck
with all that dirt
263
00:11:29,240 --> 00:11:31,138
and monkey shit.
[ Laughs ]
264
00:11:31,173 --> 00:11:33,278
Hey, Tyler, I think it's cool
that your girl
265
00:11:33,313 --> 00:11:34,901
is into the negroid arts.
266
00:11:34,935 --> 00:11:36,799
You know, she gonna help me
find a white bitch.
267
00:11:36,834 --> 00:11:39,733
[ Laughs ] White bitches
don't stress you out
268
00:11:39,768 --> 00:11:41,286
like Black women, you know?
269
00:11:41,321 --> 00:11:43,426
Man, you ever had
any Black pussy?
270
00:11:43,461 --> 00:11:44,738
Uh...
[ Clears throat ]
271
00:11:44,773 --> 00:11:47,430
I -- Well, I-I --
I have, um, dated
272
00:11:47,465 --> 00:11:49,432
an African-American woman
before.
273
00:11:49,467 --> 00:11:51,745
Hey, so look,
which one you like
274
00:11:51,780 --> 00:11:53,264
going down on?
Them or white bitches?
275
00:11:53,298 --> 00:11:54,817
You know, 'cause I'm just
trying to figure it out,
276
00:11:54,852 --> 00:11:56,543
'cause let me tell you,
them white bitches,
277
00:11:56,577 --> 00:11:57,993
they throw it back at you.
278
00:11:58,027 --> 00:11:59,960
[ Laughs ]
Right in your mouth.
279
00:11:59,995 --> 00:12:02,480
[ Laughs ]
280
00:12:02,514 --> 00:12:04,758
What the fuck
is your problem?
281
00:12:04,793 --> 00:12:08,451
Can you please stop saying
the word "white bitch"?
282
00:12:08,486 --> 00:12:10,246
Uh, Caucasian bitch.
283
00:12:10,281 --> 00:12:13,008
-[ Sighs ]
-Just stop saying "bitch."
284
00:12:13,042 --> 00:12:16,425
You know what, Cassandra,
I don't like that word, either.
285
00:12:16,459 --> 00:12:18,185
Don't like it.
Really don't.
286
00:12:18,220 --> 00:12:20,049
It's actually deplorable.
-Oh.
287
00:12:20,084 --> 00:12:21,948
Well, you didn't seem
to have a problem with it
288
00:12:21,982 --> 00:12:25,848
when he said it about 18 times
in the last 31 seconds, so...
289
00:12:25,883 --> 00:12:28,195
I'm Jesus. I hear that type
of language all the time.
290
00:12:28,230 --> 00:12:29,541
Don't phase me, though.
291
00:12:29,576 --> 00:12:31,854
Oh, so blatant sexism
doesn't phase you?
292
00:12:31,889 --> 00:12:34,857
Saying an entire continent of
people stink doesn't phase you.
293
00:12:34,892 --> 00:12:37,308
You're supposed to be Jesus,
and you hang out
294
00:12:37,342 --> 00:12:40,173
with lowlifes like this?
295
00:12:40,207 --> 00:12:41,450
Exactly!
296
00:12:41,484 --> 00:12:43,141
[ Both laugh ]Much love, brother.
297
00:12:43,176 --> 00:12:44,867
Good folks right here.
Good people.
298
00:12:44,902 --> 00:12:47,145
I'm finna just go ahead
and roll this blunt.
299
00:12:47,180 --> 00:12:48,560
Ooh, twist a fat one.
300
00:12:48,595 --> 00:12:51,978
You are a disgusting,
contemptible,
301
00:12:52,012 --> 00:12:56,845
deplorable, racist,
misogynist piece of human filth.
302
00:12:56,879 --> 00:12:59,054
Do you say that because
I'm Black or --
303
00:12:59,088 --> 00:13:01,125
Tyler, I want these people
the fuck out of my house!
304
00:13:01,159 --> 00:13:02,574
-So no white bitches?
-Go!
305
00:13:02,609 --> 00:13:04,369
Jesus: Okay, Cassandra.
God bless y'all.
306
00:13:04,404 --> 00:13:06,371
You got a beautiful home,
though.
307
00:13:08,857 --> 00:13:11,998
No, no, no!
308
00:13:12,032 --> 00:13:15,449
My ill-gotten gains
are gone!
309
00:13:15,484 --> 00:13:18,970
No! Oh, boy.
310
00:13:19,005 --> 00:13:22,146
Oh, Lord.
311
00:13:22,180 --> 00:13:24,079
Thou shalt not steal,
Lloyd.
312
00:13:24,113 --> 00:13:27,530
You mean the way you stole the
joy of my drunken inebriation?
313
00:13:27,565 --> 00:13:29,878
Huh? Lookit, Jesus.
Look at this.
314
00:13:29,912 --> 00:13:32,225
Look at this.
315
00:13:32,259 --> 00:13:35,055
No buzz.
I can drink all I want.
316
00:13:35,090 --> 00:13:37,920
And that little petty-ass
thievery for re-sale,
317
00:13:37,955 --> 00:13:40,578
at least I felt I was trying
to do something for people.
318
00:13:40,612 --> 00:13:43,167
And my eBay
merchant ratings,
319
00:13:43,201 --> 00:13:44,375
oh, it's really
gonna eat shit.
320
00:13:44,409 --> 00:13:47,240
Eat shit!
Eat shit!
321
00:13:47,274 --> 00:13:49,483
You know what that means?
Eat shit!
322
00:13:49,518 --> 00:13:52,141
Eat shit, Jesus!
323
00:13:52,176 --> 00:13:54,005
Eat shit!
324
00:13:54,040 --> 00:13:57,595
So his grimy ass
was flipping it all on eBay
325
00:13:57,629 --> 00:14:00,425
and making a killing.
That's messed up.
326
00:14:00,460 --> 00:14:03,256
My stupid ass
out here stealing rims.
327
00:14:03,290 --> 00:14:05,396
This must be where
the money really is.
328
00:14:05,430 --> 00:14:08,295
If dumb, drunk Lloyd can do it,
I can.
329
00:14:08,330 --> 00:14:10,401
So, what you
gonna do with it?
330
00:14:10,435 --> 00:14:13,404
Uh...
finders, keepers.
331
00:14:13,438 --> 00:14:15,095
Hey, you want a jPad?
332
00:14:15,130 --> 00:14:16,579
Oh.
333
00:14:18,478 --> 00:14:20,273
Aren't you going to work?
Do you need to take a shower?
334
00:14:20,307 --> 00:14:24,449
[ Sighs ]
I was just thinking, um...
335
00:14:24,484 --> 00:14:26,624
Maybe that job isn't for me.
[ Scoffs ]
336
00:14:26,658 --> 00:14:28,971
Is this about
your "hood" Jesus?
337
00:14:29,006 --> 00:14:30,904
What the fuck
is your problem?!
338
00:14:30,939 --> 00:14:32,595
Of all the made-up Jesuses,
you had to find
339
00:14:32,630 --> 00:14:34,632
the most fucked up
one of all.
340
00:14:34,666 --> 00:14:37,566
And where's the proof, huh?
I didn't see any miracles.
341
00:14:37,600 --> 00:14:39,982
He is not a fake.
342
00:14:40,017 --> 00:14:42,295
And you know what, maybe --
maybe you are racist.
343
00:14:42,329 --> 00:14:44,987
Huh?
Denying the Black son of God?
344
00:14:45,022 --> 00:14:47,438
You know what, I'm not gonna
force this on you any more.
345
00:14:47,472 --> 00:14:49,612
I will explore it
on my own.
346
00:14:49,647 --> 00:14:51,718
I know what I saw.
347
00:14:51,752 --> 00:14:54,963
I saw a miracle![ Door closes ]
348
00:14:54,997 --> 00:14:57,448
♪ Come on
and put your hands up ♪
349
00:14:57,482 --> 00:14:59,277
[ Car locks beep ]
350
00:14:59,312 --> 00:15:06,319
♪♪
351
00:15:06,353 --> 00:15:09,287
Fellas.
352
00:15:09,322 --> 00:15:11,496
Bonnie: Hey, Jesus,
the white boy here, man.
353
00:15:11,531 --> 00:15:13,464
Hey, uh, I would offer you
something,
354
00:15:13,498 --> 00:15:16,639
but we don't have things
like food.
355
00:15:16,674 --> 00:15:18,607
Uh, you want a jPad?
356
00:15:18,641 --> 00:15:21,437
-Uh, yeah. Sure thing.
-All right.
357
00:15:21,472 --> 00:15:23,301
Last night was, uh, fun.
358
00:15:23,336 --> 00:15:26,270
But did Cassandra
have a good time, though?
359
00:15:26,304 --> 00:15:28,203
Hey, she a solid
young lady, man.
360
00:15:28,237 --> 00:15:30,032
You better keep her
on your team.
361
00:15:30,067 --> 00:15:32,690
Plus, she know all about
the motherland. [ Chuckles ]
362
00:15:32,724 --> 00:15:34,519
Yeah. Um...
matter of fact,
363
00:15:34,554 --> 00:15:37,384
I might need
to crash here a few nights,
364
00:15:37,419 --> 00:15:38,627
if that's all right
with you guys.
365
00:15:38,661 --> 00:15:39,973
Oh, man, for sure.
366
00:15:40,008 --> 00:15:42,700
You already know, man,
that's nothing, man.
367
00:15:42,734 --> 00:15:44,702
Check it out.
It be like that sometimes.
368
00:15:44,736 --> 00:15:47,187
Look,
mi casa es su casa.
369
00:15:47,222 --> 00:15:49,327
Well,
Boonie casa is su casa.
370
00:15:49,362 --> 00:15:51,605
You get it, pimp.
[ Chuckles ]
371
00:15:51,640 --> 00:15:53,021
Uh...
372
00:15:53,055 --> 00:15:54,712
Listen, Jesus.
373
00:15:54,746 --> 00:15:57,232
I was thinking, and...
374
00:15:57,266 --> 00:15:59,061
I'm ready to commit.
375
00:15:59,096 --> 00:16:02,202
To -- To this.
To you.
376
00:16:02,237 --> 00:16:04,515
I want to love life, too.
377
00:16:04,549 --> 00:16:06,206
That's what
I'm talking about.
378
00:16:06,241 --> 00:16:08,381
Well, let's find it,
then, pimp!
379
00:16:08,415 --> 00:16:10,521
Hey, look, me and Boonie was
just about to go to the store
380
00:16:10,555 --> 00:16:12,557
to get some more blunts
and libations.
381
00:16:12,592 --> 00:16:14,697
Man, we about to light
this motherfucker up!
382
00:16:14,732 --> 00:16:16,596
Smoke! Take it in.
383
00:16:16,630 --> 00:16:19,392
Feel God's love
all through your lungs.
384
00:16:19,426 --> 00:16:22,257
Breathe in love.
Breathe out the hate.
385
00:16:22,291 --> 00:16:30,230
♪♪
386
00:16:30,265 --> 00:16:32,025
[ Echoing ]
Feel it. Hit it.
387
00:16:34,752 --> 00:16:36,754
[ Normal voice ]
You feel God's love?
388
00:16:37,582 --> 00:16:39,412
Pass me my shit, man.
You holdin' it too long.
389
00:16:39,446 --> 00:16:41,069
[ Coughing ] Sorry.
390
00:16:41,103 --> 00:16:47,178
♪♪
391
00:16:47,213 --> 00:16:49,422
[ Coughs ]
-Morning, pimp!
392
00:16:49,456 --> 00:16:50,595
-[ Groans ]
-What's happenin'?
393
00:16:50,630 --> 00:16:51,769
[ Chuckles ]
394
00:16:51,803 --> 00:16:53,288
Morning.
395
00:16:53,322 --> 00:16:56,429
I had this dream
we were dodging gunshots
396
00:16:56,463 --> 00:16:58,741
in a car chase
with the cops.
397
00:16:58,776 --> 00:17:00,398
For some reason,
they only let us go
398
00:17:00,433 --> 00:17:01,779
after they took my pants.
399
00:17:01,813 --> 00:17:04,713
Them cops, they really dug
them trousers, dawg.
400
00:17:04,747 --> 00:17:07,267
[ Chuckles ]
I'm telling you, pimp,
401
00:17:07,302 --> 00:17:08,786
this life ain't
for everybody.
402
00:17:08,820 --> 00:17:11,616
But we did get to save
some souls last night --
403
00:17:11,651 --> 00:17:15,103
Yes, we did --
in a major way.
404
00:17:15,137 --> 00:17:18,451
Hey, new guy!
Feel like making a coffee run?
405
00:17:18,485 --> 00:17:20,073
[ Chuckles ]
406
00:17:20,108 --> 00:17:22,489
[ Indistinct chatter ]
407
00:17:24,595 --> 00:17:27,632
[ Tires squeal ]
408
00:17:27,667 --> 00:17:29,841
[ Car doors close ]
409
00:17:32,672 --> 00:17:34,605
You stole my jPad,
fucker.
410
00:17:34,639 --> 00:17:36,331
What? Whoa! I did not!
411
00:17:36,365 --> 00:17:38,643
Get him!
412
00:17:38,678 --> 00:17:40,645
Stop! Stop!
I'm sorry!
413
00:17:40,680 --> 00:17:42,475
Jesus!
414
00:17:42,509 --> 00:17:45,167
[ Tire iron clatters ]
415
00:17:45,202 --> 00:17:47,204
Why did you guys give me
a stolen jPad?
416
00:17:47,238 --> 00:17:49,171
That "find my phone" app
nearly cost me my life.
417
00:17:49,206 --> 00:17:51,277
Man, you just scared
this condom off me.
418
00:17:51,311 --> 00:17:52,830
And I didn't steal it!
419
00:17:52,864 --> 00:17:56,489
I-I got the stash of the person
who did steal it.
420
00:17:56,523 --> 00:17:58,284
And where's my coffee?
421
00:17:58,318 --> 00:18:02,115
Coffee?! No. No, no, no, no, no.
This is crazy.
422
00:18:02,150 --> 00:18:04,428
I-I don't get it.
Why do you guys do this?
423
00:18:04,462 --> 00:18:05,808
What is the point?
424
00:18:05,843 --> 00:18:08,156
We ask ourselves that
all the time.
425
00:18:08,190 --> 00:18:10,192
But it's supposed
to pay off one day.
426
00:18:10,227 --> 00:18:12,298
And it will.
It paid off for Fish.
427
00:18:12,332 --> 00:18:15,197
It paid off for Maggie.
It paid off for Trayvon.
428
00:18:15,232 --> 00:18:17,682
They all went on
to better lives through me.
429
00:18:17,717 --> 00:18:19,719
It pays every day
for eternity
430
00:18:19,753 --> 00:18:22,825
to stay down with your
Heavenly Father, pimp.
431
00:18:22,860 --> 00:18:25,207
Basically,
when you're dead.
432
00:18:25,242 --> 00:18:26,829
I can't wait that long.
433
00:18:26,864 --> 00:18:31,248
Tyler, Pops works through us all
in mysterious ways.
434
00:18:31,282 --> 00:18:33,526
And, by the way,
He told me He already gave you
435
00:18:33,560 --> 00:18:35,700
the tools it takes
to be great at that job
436
00:18:35,735 --> 00:18:37,219
and change the world.
437
00:18:37,254 --> 00:18:39,704
All you got to do
is trust your instincts.
438
00:18:41,499 --> 00:18:44,364
Baby, if the Black Jesus
has helped you see
439
00:18:44,399 --> 00:18:48,368
that you can make a real
difference at your job, then...
440
00:18:48,403 --> 00:18:50,405
I guess I was wrong
about him.
441
00:18:50,439 --> 00:18:52,200
[ Sighs ]
442
00:18:53,339 --> 00:18:55,720
[ Intercom buzzes ]Meghann, send in my first.
443
00:18:57,446 --> 00:18:59,172
Hey, hey.
Hold up, cuz.
444
00:18:59,207 --> 00:19:00,898
Let me at him real quick.
445
00:19:04,281 --> 00:19:05,868
Hey, Tyler.
446
00:19:05,903 --> 00:19:07,422
I was all wrong, homey.
447
00:19:07,456 --> 00:19:08,871
All that
"think positive" nonsense
448
00:19:08,906 --> 00:19:11,564
landed my Black ass
a job, homey.
449
00:19:11,598 --> 00:19:12,910
It did?
450
00:19:12,944 --> 00:19:15,223
That's great!
451
00:19:15,257 --> 00:19:17,225
Uh, what are --
what are you doing?
452
00:19:17,259 --> 00:19:19,503
Beating up motherfuckers
at the Glam Gam Bikini Bar
453
00:19:19,537 --> 00:19:21,229
if they fuck
with the girls.
454
00:19:21,263 --> 00:19:24,335
Bitches really
appreciate my ass now.
455
00:19:24,370 --> 00:19:26,441
'Cause of your ass!
456
00:19:28,028 --> 00:19:29,996
Hey, come here, homey.
457
00:19:30,030 --> 00:19:31,411
Hey.
458
00:19:31,446 --> 00:19:34,242
You see this white --
459
00:19:34,276 --> 00:19:35,553
this dude right here?
460
00:19:35,588 --> 00:19:37,728
Listen to him.
He'll set you straight.
461
00:19:37,762 --> 00:19:39,557
All right.
462
00:19:39,592 --> 00:19:41,870
You're still
a fucking nerd.
463
00:19:45,943 --> 00:19:48,428
[ Heavenly music plays ]
464
00:19:48,463 --> 00:19:49,774
Thanks, Jesus.
465
00:19:49,809 --> 00:19:51,914
The name's Jesus.
[hey-zoos]
33452
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof