Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,871 --> 00:00:03,206
[♪♪]
2
00:00:07,335 --> 00:00:08,711
Morning, sweetheart.
3
00:00:08,711 --> 00:00:10,255
Morning.
4
00:00:10,255 --> 00:00:11,673
How do you feel?
5
00:00:11,673 --> 00:00:12,799
I feel fine.
6
00:00:18,179 --> 00:00:20,723
Have you got a headache
or something?
7
00:00:20,723 --> 00:00:22,934
What makes you think
I have a headache?
8
00:00:22,934 --> 00:00:25,645
Your head looks
like it's aching.
9
00:00:25,645 --> 00:00:27,647
Cute.
10
00:00:27,647 --> 00:00:28,773
But I feel fine.
11
00:00:29,899 --> 00:00:31,567
Well, I, uh,
12
00:00:31,567 --> 00:00:33,403
only asked
because it was after 4
13
00:00:33,403 --> 00:00:35,321
when you got to bed last night.
14
00:00:35,321 --> 00:00:36,781
I stayed up
to work out a new approach
15
00:00:36,781 --> 00:00:39,158
to the campaign
for Harmon Savings and Loan.
16
00:00:39,158 --> 00:00:40,576
And you found it?
17
00:00:40,576 --> 00:00:41,703
I hope so.
18
00:00:41,703 --> 00:00:44,080
I've struck out three times
in a row,
19
00:00:44,080 --> 00:00:45,748
and I don't want
to be a four-time loser.
20
00:00:45,748 --> 00:00:47,583
Well, you're just
in a little slump.
21
00:00:48,459 --> 00:00:51,087
Sam, are you sure your mother
22
00:00:51,087 --> 00:00:53,673
hasn't been fooling around?
23
00:00:53,673 --> 00:00:56,968
Sweetheart,
when Mother fools around,
24
00:00:56,968 --> 00:00:58,428
there is no question about it.
25
00:00:58,428 --> 00:01:00,305
Now, you're just
a little tired and upset.
26
00:01:00,305 --> 00:01:02,223
I'll fix you breakfast.
You'll feel better.
27
00:01:02,223 --> 00:01:05,310
I'm not upset and I'm
not tired and I feel fine.
28
00:01:06,728 --> 00:01:08,146
ENDORA:
If he's like this
29
00:01:08,146 --> 00:01:09,731
when he's fine,
30
00:01:09,731 --> 00:01:12,942
however do you endure him
when he's miserable?
31
00:01:12,942 --> 00:01:14,652
Good morning,
sweetheart.
32
00:01:14,652 --> 00:01:15,862
Mother.
33
00:01:15,862 --> 00:01:17,780
Good morning, Durwood.
34
00:01:19,824 --> 00:01:21,659
Don't you ever knock?
35
00:01:21,659 --> 00:01:22,869
Oh, sorry.
36
00:01:22,869 --> 00:01:25,496
[KNOCKING SOUND]
37
00:01:25,496 --> 00:01:27,248
Never mind breakfast, Sam.
38
00:01:27,248 --> 00:01:29,125
I just lost my appetite.
39
00:01:29,125 --> 00:01:31,669
My, aren't we touchy
this morning?
40
00:01:31,669 --> 00:01:35,089
Mother, may I ask
a simple question
41
00:01:35,089 --> 00:01:36,549
and get an honest answer?
42
00:01:36,549 --> 00:01:39,469
"Yes" to the first
and "maybe" to the second.
43
00:01:39,469 --> 00:01:42,680
Please, make an all-out effort.
44
00:01:42,680 --> 00:01:45,641
Have you been fooling around
with Darrin?
45
00:01:45,641 --> 00:01:49,395
Great Hector's ghost,
what a revolting thought.
46
00:01:49,395 --> 00:01:51,189
Endora, you have all the charm
47
00:01:51,189 --> 00:01:52,857
of a hooded cobra.
48
00:01:52,857 --> 00:01:55,276
Well, never mind that, Mother.
49
00:01:55,276 --> 00:01:56,861
Just answer the question.
50
00:01:56,861 --> 00:01:58,821
All right.
51
00:01:58,821 --> 00:02:02,825
I have not been meddling
in what's-his-name's work.
52
00:02:04,369 --> 00:02:06,245
Witch's honor.
53
00:02:09,957 --> 00:02:11,459
Thank you, Mother.
54
00:02:11,459 --> 00:02:13,836
There, your worries are over.
55
00:02:13,836 --> 00:02:15,713
ENDORA:
That doesn't mean
I won't start.
56
00:02:17,048 --> 00:02:18,633
If my worries are over,
57
00:02:18,633 --> 00:02:20,885
how come my headache
just got worse?
58
00:02:27,600 --> 00:02:29,936
[NARRATOR READING
ON-SCREEN TEXT]
59
00:02:29,936 --> 00:02:31,020
[♪♪]
60
00:03:09,016 --> 00:03:10,435
[♪♪]
61
00:03:16,065 --> 00:03:18,276
[♪♪]
62
00:03:18,276 --> 00:03:19,527
Good morning, Darrin.
63
00:03:19,527 --> 00:03:21,612
I hope you feel lucky
this morning.
64
00:03:21,612 --> 00:03:24,115
Larry, I have a feeling, uh,
we shouldn't trust my luck.
65
00:03:24,115 --> 00:03:25,616
It hasn't been
too good lately.
66
00:03:25,616 --> 00:03:28,077
Now, there's no reason
for that attitude, Darrin.
67
00:03:28,077 --> 00:03:31,956
I mean, just because you've been
consistently bombing out lately
68
00:03:31,956 --> 00:03:33,666
doesn't mean
it's going to continue.
69
00:03:33,666 --> 00:03:34,709
Why not?
70
00:03:34,709 --> 00:03:38,171
Because if it continues,
you won't.
71
00:03:38,171 --> 00:03:40,006
[LAUGHS]
72
00:03:40,006 --> 00:03:41,632
Mind if I take a look?
73
00:03:41,632 --> 00:03:43,384
Be my guest.
74
00:03:43,885 --> 00:03:46,304
Hm. Hm.
75
00:03:46,304 --> 00:03:49,474
Mm-hm. Mm-hm.
76
00:03:49,474 --> 00:03:52,560
I like it. It's cute,
but not too cute.
77
00:03:52,560 --> 00:03:54,937
Original, but not
too far-out.
78
00:03:54,937 --> 00:03:57,231
And it gets the message across
without being obvious.
79
00:03:57,231 --> 00:03:58,649
You really like it?
80
00:03:58,649 --> 00:04:00,568
I'm sure I'll think
it's terrific.
81
00:04:00,568 --> 00:04:02,069
When?
82
00:04:02,069 --> 00:04:03,654
When the client loves it.
83
00:04:03,654 --> 00:04:05,615
[PHONE BUZZES]
84
00:04:05,615 --> 00:04:06,616
Yes?
85
00:04:06,616 --> 00:04:08,826
Oh, send him in.
Send him in.
86
00:04:08,826 --> 00:04:10,661
It's Harmon.
Now, pull yourself together.
87
00:04:10,661 --> 00:04:12,705
Let's have
some positive thinking.
88
00:04:12,705 --> 00:04:15,541
Oh-ho, good to see you,
Mr. Harmon.
89
00:04:15,541 --> 00:04:17,668
Come in. Come in.
You remember Darrin Stephens?
90
00:04:17,668 --> 00:04:19,045
Of course
I remember Stephens.
91
00:04:19,045 --> 00:04:20,588
How are you,
Mr. Harmon?
92
00:04:20,588 --> 00:04:23,007
It's his last three ideas
I'm trying to forget.
93
00:04:23,007 --> 00:04:24,759
[LAUGHS]
94
00:04:24,759 --> 00:04:27,386
Well, you know how unpredictable
creative people are.
95
00:04:27,386 --> 00:04:28,804
And Stephens is one of
96
00:04:28,804 --> 00:04:31,974
the most creative men we have.
Okay, okay.
97
00:04:31,974 --> 00:04:34,435
Let's see what he's created
this time and let's be quick.
98
00:04:34,435 --> 00:04:35,937
My time is money, you know.
99
00:04:35,937 --> 00:04:37,146
Oh, we know. We know.
100
00:04:37,146 --> 00:04:38,439
Show him what you have, Darrin.
101
00:04:38,439 --> 00:04:39,649
He's got a great idea.
102
00:04:39,649 --> 00:04:41,984
Let me be
the judge of that.
103
00:04:41,984 --> 00:04:43,444
Yes, of course.
104
00:04:43,444 --> 00:04:47,323
Now, as you will see, uh,
this idea is adaptable
105
00:04:47,323 --> 00:04:49,534
to all advertising media
106
00:04:49,534 --> 00:04:52,245
and it is aimed
at the smaller investor.
107
00:04:52,245 --> 00:04:53,663
What's that?
108
00:04:53,663 --> 00:04:55,373
I-It's a grasshopper. You see--
109
00:04:55,373 --> 00:04:56,916
Grasshopper?
110
00:04:56,916 --> 00:04:59,210
I have the largest
investment firm in the country
111
00:04:59,210 --> 00:05:01,462
and you give me a grasshopper?
112
00:05:01,462 --> 00:05:04,215
Well, this idea
i-i-is in four parts,
113
00:05:04,215 --> 00:05:06,050
each one dependent
on the other.
114
00:05:06,050 --> 00:05:09,220
Now, here you see a, uh,
grasshopper in a business suit
115
00:05:10,346 --> 00:05:13,015
followed by
a hippie caterpillar.
116
00:05:13,015 --> 00:05:14,684
Grasshopper? Caterpillar?
117
00:05:14,684 --> 00:05:16,185
What do you think
I'm advertising,
118
00:05:16,185 --> 00:05:17,728
a pest-control service?
119
00:05:17,728 --> 00:05:20,398
Do you have reservations
about this idea, Mr. Harmon?
120
00:05:20,398 --> 00:05:22,608
Uh, Mr. Harmon
hasn't seen it yet.
121
00:05:22,608 --> 00:05:24,777
What else have you got?
A cockroach, maybe?
122
00:05:25,611 --> 00:05:27,905
No.
123
00:05:27,905 --> 00:05:30,408
A ladybug, carrying her purse
and also about--
124
00:05:30,408 --> 00:05:33,578
Darrin, I don't think
we're reaching Mr. Harmon.
125
00:05:33,578 --> 00:05:35,913
Mr. Harmon,
if you'll just hear me out.
126
00:05:35,913 --> 00:05:37,331
I've heard and seen enough.
127
00:05:37,331 --> 00:05:38,916
It's got the cutes
and it's too far-out.
128
00:05:38,916 --> 00:05:42,128
Interesting. I was making
a similar comment earlier.
129
00:05:42,128 --> 00:05:44,839
If you have nothing better
to offer, I have other business.
130
00:05:44,839 --> 00:05:46,173
Uh, Mr. Harmon,
131
00:05:46,173 --> 00:05:48,426
if you'll just give us
a little more time on this,
132
00:05:48,426 --> 00:05:50,595
I'm sure we can get
the bugs out.
133
00:05:52,763 --> 00:05:55,683
Uh, Mr. Harmon, I'll call you
at your hotel later. Wait--
134
00:05:57,643 --> 00:06:00,396
You and your lousy ideas.
135
00:06:00,396 --> 00:06:01,772
But you said you liked it.
136
00:06:01,772 --> 00:06:03,983
I do. I do,
but the client doesn't.
137
00:06:03,983 --> 00:06:08,404
Which brings me
to an interesting hypothesis.
138
00:06:08,404 --> 00:06:09,947
What's that?
139
00:06:09,947 --> 00:06:11,407
The problem is you.
140
00:06:11,407 --> 00:06:13,618
Admittedly, it's a good idea
141
00:06:13,618 --> 00:06:15,870
but you're projecting
such a lack of confidence
142
00:06:15,870 --> 00:06:18,414
that the client would hate it
even if he loved it.
143
00:06:18,414 --> 00:06:19,624
Larry, believe me,
144
00:06:19,624 --> 00:06:21,042
Mr. Harmon's reaction
145
00:06:21,042 --> 00:06:23,836
has nothing to do
with my lack of confidence.
146
00:06:23,836 --> 00:06:27,340
No? What do you think it is?
Black magic, maybe?
147
00:06:27,340 --> 00:06:30,509
Would you believe me
if I said yes?
148
00:06:32,511 --> 00:06:34,138
Darrin, you're tired.
149
00:06:34,138 --> 00:06:36,307
Why don't you take
a few days off
150
00:06:36,307 --> 00:06:38,851
and we'll discuss it then?
151
00:06:38,851 --> 00:06:40,102
Okay?
152
00:06:40,102 --> 00:06:41,604
[♪♪]
153
00:06:46,817 --> 00:06:50,363
Sam?
154
00:06:50,363 --> 00:06:51,989
Oh, hi, sweetheart.
155
00:06:51,989 --> 00:06:53,491
What are you doing home
so early?
156
00:06:53,491 --> 00:06:55,326
Ask your mother.
157
00:06:55,326 --> 00:06:57,370
Uh-oh.
That's right.
158
00:06:57,370 --> 00:06:58,829
Your mother's struck again.
159
00:06:58,829 --> 00:07:01,957
I had a perfectly good idea.
Larry loved it.
160
00:07:01,957 --> 00:07:05,878
And then I barely got started
when, zap, for no reason,
161
00:07:05,878 --> 00:07:07,254
the client hated it.
162
00:07:07,254 --> 00:07:09,382
Your mother is worse
than Typhoid Mary.
163
00:07:09,382 --> 00:07:11,425
Okay, careful, sweetheart.
164
00:07:11,425 --> 00:07:14,011
Careful, my foot.
165
00:07:14,011 --> 00:07:16,180
Did you hear that, Mary?
166
00:07:16,180 --> 00:07:20,893
I did. And I'm sure they
also heard it six blocks away.
167
00:07:20,893 --> 00:07:22,144
Good.
168
00:07:22,144 --> 00:07:23,854
Endora, I'm telling you
for the last time,
169
00:07:23,854 --> 00:07:26,524
keep your hocus-pocus
out of my life.
170
00:07:26,524 --> 00:07:29,694
Typical mortal behavior,
171
00:07:29,694 --> 00:07:31,487
looking for a scapegoat
172
00:07:31,487 --> 00:07:33,656
to blame for their own failures.
173
00:07:33,656 --> 00:07:37,993
Uh, Mother, did you put
a spell on Darrin?
174
00:07:37,993 --> 00:07:40,579
There's nothing
I could do to Durwood
175
00:07:40,579 --> 00:07:42,707
that wouldn't
be an improvement.
176
00:07:44,166 --> 00:07:46,711
So it's perfectly obvious
I didn't do anything.
177
00:07:46,711 --> 00:07:50,423
But you're tempting me.
178
00:07:50,423 --> 00:07:53,384
Well, n-never mind.
179
00:07:53,384 --> 00:07:54,760
But-- But I--
I would appreciate it
180
00:07:54,760 --> 00:07:57,221
if you'd leave us alone
for a while.
181
00:07:57,221 --> 00:07:58,431
Like forever.
182
00:07:58,431 --> 00:07:59,849
Darrin.
183
00:07:59,849 --> 00:08:00,975
[HISSES]
184
00:08:03,227 --> 00:08:04,812
So long, Mary.
185
00:08:04,812 --> 00:08:07,565
ENDORA:
I've not only lost a daughter,
186
00:08:07,565 --> 00:08:10,401
I've gained a bullhorn.
187
00:08:10,401 --> 00:08:12,069
You--
188
00:08:12,069 --> 00:08:14,947
Oh-- Uh-- Now-- Now,
sweetheart, uh, relax.
189
00:08:14,947 --> 00:08:17,533
It-- It really isn't fair
to blame Mother.
190
00:08:17,533 --> 00:08:18,993
Uh, somebody
has been horsing around.
191
00:08:18,993 --> 00:08:21,370
But it could be Serena
or Uncle Arthur or Daddy--
192
00:08:21,370 --> 00:08:23,581
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I know.
193
00:08:23,581 --> 00:08:25,499
Any one
of a cast of thousands.
194
00:08:25,499 --> 00:08:28,419
Okay. So the only way
to solve this
195
00:08:28,419 --> 00:08:29,754
is to find out
what the spell is,
196
00:08:29,754 --> 00:08:32,256
where it came from
and then deal with it.
197
00:08:32,256 --> 00:08:33,758
Well, how do we do that?
198
00:08:33,758 --> 00:08:35,926
I'll get Dr. Bombay
and he can give you a test
199
00:08:35,926 --> 00:08:38,220
to find out what kind
of a spell you're under.
200
00:08:38,220 --> 00:08:39,555
That's a big help.
201
00:08:39,555 --> 00:08:42,141
Calling in one fraud
to substantiate another.
202
00:08:42,141 --> 00:08:44,685
Darrin, look at it this way:
203
00:08:44,685 --> 00:08:46,353
It's the only game in town.
204
00:08:46,353 --> 00:08:47,730
Okay. Okay.
205
00:08:49,231 --> 00:08:52,318
Calling all stations
From Hong Kong to Pompeii.
206
00:08:52,318 --> 00:08:54,570
Come in if you read me
Dr. Bombay.
207
00:08:54,570 --> 00:08:57,031
BOMBAY:
Dr. Bombay, here.
208
00:08:57,031 --> 00:09:00,117
Never mind your pills
Forget your thermometer
209
00:09:00,117 --> 00:09:03,329
Come on the run
With your trusty hexometer
210
00:09:03,329 --> 00:09:05,372
His trusty what?
211
00:09:05,372 --> 00:09:07,541
His hexom--
Hexometer.
212
00:09:07,541 --> 00:09:09,752
I invented
this remarkable machine
213
00:09:09,752 --> 00:09:12,213
to detect the presence
of witchcraft
214
00:09:12,213 --> 00:09:14,298
on or about a person.
215
00:09:14,298 --> 00:09:16,884
No home should be without it.
216
00:09:20,221 --> 00:09:21,430
Nothing.
217
00:09:21,430 --> 00:09:22,765
[BOMBAY LAUGHS]
218
00:09:26,435 --> 00:09:28,562
And I don't appreciate
this emergency call.
219
00:09:28,562 --> 00:09:30,648
I was about to tackle
my nurse.
220
00:09:30,648 --> 00:09:32,274
Tackle your nurse?
221
00:09:32,274 --> 00:09:35,444
Naturally. You don't think
we'd play touch, do you?
222
00:09:35,444 --> 00:09:36,737
That would be indecent.
223
00:09:36,737 --> 00:09:39,323
Dr. Bombay, uh,
could you just tell us
224
00:09:39,323 --> 00:09:40,533
about the witchcraft?
225
00:09:40,533 --> 00:09:42,326
Very well. First of all,
226
00:09:42,326 --> 00:09:44,829
I must hook him up
to the machine.
227
00:09:44,829 --> 00:09:47,706
Sam, this isn't going
to prove anything
228
00:09:47,706 --> 00:09:50,668
except what an idiot I am
for submitting to it.
229
00:09:50,668 --> 00:09:53,963
Not your arm, my boy, your head.
230
00:09:58,884 --> 00:10:01,095
Now, stand still, sweetheart.
It won't hurt.
231
00:10:22,491 --> 00:10:24,702
[ELECTRONIC BEEPING]
232
00:10:32,710 --> 00:10:34,211
What's happening?
233
00:10:34,211 --> 00:10:36,630
All your hot air
is rising to the surface.
234
00:10:40,467 --> 00:10:41,844
Mm-hm. It's clean.
235
00:10:41,844 --> 00:10:44,013
Absolutely no exhaust
emission,
236
00:10:44,013 --> 00:10:45,097
as you can see.
237
00:10:45,097 --> 00:10:47,892
My boy, you're loaded
with witchcraft.
238
00:10:47,892 --> 00:10:50,060
But you said it was clean.
239
00:10:50,060 --> 00:10:51,228
Perfectly.
240
00:10:52,313 --> 00:10:54,690
Witchcraft exhaust is clean.
241
00:10:54,690 --> 00:10:56,984
Mortal exhaust is dirty.
242
00:10:56,984 --> 00:10:57,985
Terrific.
243
00:10:57,985 --> 00:11:00,404
Dr. Bombay, uh,
could you tell us
244
00:11:00,404 --> 00:11:01,780
who put the spell on Darrin?
245
00:11:01,780 --> 00:11:03,115
Of course, my dear.
246
00:11:07,077 --> 00:11:08,913
In a few moments,
the perpetrator
247
00:11:08,913 --> 00:11:12,249
of this ghastly crime
will appear on my oscillator.
248
00:11:16,170 --> 00:11:17,588
That's peculiar.
249
00:11:17,588 --> 00:11:19,548
The metaphysical
atmospheric continuum
250
00:11:19,548 --> 00:11:21,258
is strangely scrambled.
251
00:11:21,258 --> 00:11:23,469
So I'm afraid
I can't tell you who, uh--
252
00:11:23,469 --> 00:11:24,678
Who cast this spell.
253
00:11:24,678 --> 00:11:25,888
B-But, doctor--
254
00:11:25,888 --> 00:11:28,349
Precisely, "doctor."
255
00:11:28,349 --> 00:11:29,892
I am not a mystic.
256
00:11:33,354 --> 00:11:34,730
Call me if he gets violent.
257
00:11:34,730 --> 00:11:36,649
And now I have to get back
to my nurse.
258
00:11:36,649 --> 00:11:39,318
I think the next play
called for a pass.
259
00:11:39,318 --> 00:11:42,196
Get it? "Nurse"? "Pass"?
260
00:11:42,196 --> 00:11:43,739
[LAUGHS]
261
00:11:46,367 --> 00:11:48,827
[SIGHS]
Nothing.
262
00:11:51,246 --> 00:11:52,790
He's gone, sweetheart.
263
00:11:54,750 --> 00:11:57,461
That's the problem.
How can I be sure?
264
00:11:57,461 --> 00:11:59,964
Now, don't you worry.
I'll get to the bottom of this.
265
00:11:59,964 --> 00:12:02,299
In the meantime, I think you
ought to have a little drink
266
00:12:02,299 --> 00:12:03,926
and relax.
267
00:12:03,926 --> 00:12:07,179
I think I'll have a lot
of big drinks and collapse.
268
00:12:13,143 --> 00:12:15,145
Darrin, you'll be late
for the office.
269
00:12:15,145 --> 00:12:18,315
I'm not going
to the office today, Sam.
270
00:12:18,315 --> 00:12:19,566
You better call Larry.
271
00:12:19,566 --> 00:12:20,776
What will I tell him?
272
00:12:20,776 --> 00:12:23,153
Tell him I've retired.
273
00:12:23,153 --> 00:12:25,322
If that's a joke,
I don't get it.
274
00:12:25,322 --> 00:12:27,658
Sam...
275
00:12:27,658 --> 00:12:30,828
I have an announcement to make:
I give up.
276
00:12:30,828 --> 00:12:33,580
I am tired of bucking all
this witchcraft.
277
00:12:33,580 --> 00:12:34,999
No matter how hard I try,
278
00:12:34,999 --> 00:12:37,751
someone in your family
fouls things up.
279
00:12:37,751 --> 00:12:39,420
Darrin, what would you say
if I told you
280
00:12:39,420 --> 00:12:42,381
that I contacted all my
relatives and they're innocent?
281
00:12:42,381 --> 00:12:44,633
I got a witch's honor
from all of them.
282
00:12:44,633 --> 00:12:48,387
And Dr. Bombay confessed that
his hexometer is out of whack.
283
00:12:48,387 --> 00:12:52,141
I would say that we already
know Bombay is a quack
284
00:12:52,141 --> 00:12:55,185
and the credibility gap between
honor and your relatives
285
00:12:55,185 --> 00:12:57,646
could be measured
in light-years.
286
00:12:57,646 --> 00:13:00,607
Darrin, you're overreacting.
287
00:13:00,607 --> 00:13:02,776
What's wrong with retiring?
288
00:13:02,776 --> 00:13:04,987
You can zap us up
a-- A castle in Spain,
289
00:13:04,987 --> 00:13:08,240
a-- A villa in Rome, a chateau
in the south of France.
290
00:13:09,199 --> 00:13:10,701
Uh-- Oh, we'll need a yacht.
291
00:13:10,701 --> 00:13:13,078
Uh, nothing flashy,
not too big.
292
00:13:13,078 --> 00:13:15,372
Uh, somewhere between the, uh,
Queen Mary
293
00:13:15,372 --> 00:13:16,790
and the Enterprise.
294
00:13:16,790 --> 00:13:19,418
This is crazy.
You can't give up your career.
295
00:13:19,418 --> 00:13:22,963
We are my career from now on,
you and me.
296
00:13:22,963 --> 00:13:24,757
We'll spend all our time
doing the things
297
00:13:24,757 --> 00:13:28,052
we wouldn't normally be able
to do for 20 years, if ever.
298
00:13:29,636 --> 00:13:33,348
Well, sweetheart, I-- I don't
blame you for being upset.
299
00:13:33,348 --> 00:13:35,893
After what you've been through,
you had a perfect right to--
300
00:13:35,893 --> 00:13:38,062
Don't try to spare my feelings.
301
00:13:38,062 --> 00:13:39,730
If there's one thing
I can't stand,
302
00:13:39,730 --> 00:13:41,231
it's someone
feeling sorry for me.
303
00:13:42,816 --> 00:13:47,362
Especially when you're doing
such a good job of it yourself.
304
00:13:47,362 --> 00:13:48,989
You'll get used to it.
305
00:13:48,989 --> 00:13:52,367
And zap up some breakfast.
I'm starving.
306
00:14:13,347 --> 00:14:14,807
[♪♪]
307
00:14:20,813 --> 00:14:22,064
Sweetheart?
308
00:14:22,064 --> 00:14:23,315
Where's my breakfast?
309
00:14:23,315 --> 00:14:24,817
Well, your breakfast
can wait a minute.
310
00:14:24,817 --> 00:14:27,820
What I have to say
is more important.
311
00:14:27,820 --> 00:14:30,447
Sam, I don't care
to hear any more arguments.
312
00:14:30,447 --> 00:14:33,200
I give in.
From now on, I'm retired.
313
00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:34,618
We live by witchcraft.
314
00:14:34,618 --> 00:14:37,746
No arguments.
I agree with you completely.
315
00:14:37,746 --> 00:14:38,997
Almost.
316
00:14:38,997 --> 00:14:40,207
Almost?
317
00:14:40,207 --> 00:14:41,416
Except for one thing.
318
00:14:41,416 --> 00:14:42,793
Except for the witchcraft.
319
00:14:42,793 --> 00:14:45,587
Mm-mm.
Except for the retirement.
320
00:14:45,587 --> 00:14:48,382
Now, come on, Sam.
I-- I said no more arguments.
321
00:14:48,382 --> 00:14:50,425
Who's arguing?
I'm agreeing with you,
322
00:14:50,425 --> 00:14:53,846
but I think
you should continue working.
323
00:14:53,846 --> 00:14:56,849
With your know-how
and my witchcraft
324
00:14:56,849 --> 00:15:00,310
there is no end
to the heights you could reach.
325
00:15:00,310 --> 00:15:04,523
Before you know it,
Stephens & Tate
326
00:15:04,523 --> 00:15:08,193
will be the largest
advertising agency in the world.
327
00:15:08,193 --> 00:15:10,154
Maybe the only one.
328
00:15:10,154 --> 00:15:11,655
Why go to all that trouble?
329
00:15:11,655 --> 00:15:13,490
Oh, come on.
Try it just for today.
330
00:15:13,490 --> 00:15:14,867
See what fun it is.
331
00:15:14,867 --> 00:15:16,994
Uh, l-like, I could whip up
a little witchcraft
332
00:15:16,994 --> 00:15:19,580
and you could take
that same concept back to Harmon
333
00:15:19,580 --> 00:15:22,374
and he'd buy it
just like that.
334
00:15:23,250 --> 00:15:25,169
Yeah?
335
00:15:25,169 --> 00:15:28,714
Yeah, it would be fun
to see the look on Larry's face.
336
00:15:28,714 --> 00:15:31,508
You do have a lot of faith in
that savings-and-loan concept,
337
00:15:31,508 --> 00:15:33,010
don't you?
338
00:15:33,010 --> 00:15:34,970
Absolutely.
339
00:15:34,970 --> 00:15:36,180
Okay.
340
00:15:36,180 --> 00:15:37,639
[♪♪]
341
00:15:38,599 --> 00:15:41,101
Now, all you have to do...
342
00:15:42,394 --> 00:15:44,396
is drink this.
343
00:15:45,564 --> 00:15:47,691
Then you--
You say the following:
344
00:15:47,691 --> 00:15:50,903
Pinchly, finchly
Potsy, rex
345
00:15:50,903 --> 00:15:53,780
Quiddily quaddily
Beware this hex
346
00:15:54,948 --> 00:15:56,200
And then?
347
00:15:56,200 --> 00:15:57,910
There's a moment of discomfort.
348
00:15:58,827 --> 00:16:00,037
What's that?
349
00:16:00,037 --> 00:16:01,371
You turn purple.
350
00:16:02,456 --> 00:16:04,082
Oh, well,
it only lasts a second.
351
00:16:04,082 --> 00:16:05,959
And then?
352
00:16:05,959 --> 00:16:09,421
You become master
of any situation.
353
00:16:10,172 --> 00:16:13,050
Well, okay.
354
00:16:17,429 --> 00:16:18,764
Chow.
355
00:16:23,560 --> 00:16:25,062
Tastes like orange juice.
356
00:16:25,062 --> 00:16:26,271
Comes in all flavors.
357
00:16:26,271 --> 00:16:28,065
Yeah?
358
00:16:28,065 --> 00:16:29,233
And now what do I say?
359
00:16:29,233 --> 00:16:30,484
Oh, um,
360
00:16:30,484 --> 00:16:32,903
Pinchly, finchly
Potsy, rex
361
00:16:32,903 --> 00:16:34,404
Quiddily quaddily
Beware this hex
362
00:16:34,404 --> 00:16:37,199
Pinchly, finchly...
363
00:16:37,199 --> 00:16:38,408
Potsy
364
00:16:38,408 --> 00:16:40,535
...Potsy, rex
365
00:16:40,535 --> 00:16:43,038
Quiddily quaddily
Beware this hex
366
00:16:43,038 --> 00:16:45,332
Oh, I-- I forgot. You have
to turn around three times.
367
00:16:45,332 --> 00:16:46,667
Oh.
368
00:16:47,376 --> 00:16:48,877
One.
369
00:16:49,419 --> 00:16:50,754
Two.
370
00:16:53,090 --> 00:16:54,424
Three.
371
00:16:58,929 --> 00:17:00,013
It's working.
372
00:17:00,013 --> 00:17:02,182
Well, what'd you expect?
I'm a witch.
373
00:17:06,061 --> 00:17:08,272
There. You're all set.
374
00:17:08,272 --> 00:17:09,648
[SIGHS]
375
00:17:09,648 --> 00:17:11,149
I don't know
what's the matter with me.
376
00:17:11,149 --> 00:17:14,569
I should have swung with this
a long time ago.
377
00:17:14,569 --> 00:17:17,614
Well, I'm on my way.
Wish me luck, Sam.
378
00:17:17,614 --> 00:17:19,408
Luck has nothing
to do with it anymore.
379
00:17:19,408 --> 00:17:20,617
It's a sure thing.
380
00:17:20,617 --> 00:17:22,160
You're right.
381
00:17:22,160 --> 00:17:24,371
This is going to be fun.
382
00:17:24,371 --> 00:17:25,747
Mwah.
383
00:17:27,457 --> 00:17:29,793
[CHUCKLES]
384
00:17:29,793 --> 00:17:30,961
Ooh.
385
00:17:31,628 --> 00:17:33,046
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
386
00:17:33,046 --> 00:17:34,172
Come in.
387
00:17:39,011 --> 00:17:40,679
Darrin, what are you
doing here?
388
00:17:40,679 --> 00:17:42,222
I thought I told you to rest up
for a few days.
389
00:17:42,222 --> 00:17:45,267
I'm all rested and ready
to tackle Harmon again.
390
00:17:45,267 --> 00:17:47,811
I am sure I can sell him
this presentation now.
391
00:17:49,104 --> 00:17:50,939
The same presentation?
392
00:17:50,939 --> 00:17:52,649
That's right.
393
00:17:52,649 --> 00:17:54,359
Go home.
You need more rest.
394
00:17:54,359 --> 00:17:56,111
Larry, in your mind
395
00:17:56,111 --> 00:17:58,071
the Harmon account
is down the drain, right?
396
00:17:58,989 --> 00:18:00,157
Right.
397
00:18:00,157 --> 00:18:01,742
Then what have we got to lose?
398
00:18:01,742 --> 00:18:05,412
But the same presentation?
Harmon hated it.
399
00:18:05,412 --> 00:18:07,331
Harmon didn't even hear it.
400
00:18:07,331 --> 00:18:08,749
But today he'll listen.
401
00:18:08,749 --> 00:18:10,500
What makes you think so?
402
00:18:10,500 --> 00:18:12,836
Well, I--
I wasn't myself yesterday.
403
00:18:12,836 --> 00:18:15,213
But things are different now.
404
00:18:15,213 --> 00:18:17,090
Things are different?
405
00:18:18,300 --> 00:18:20,344
Well, just take my word for it.
406
00:18:20,344 --> 00:18:22,679
Make another date with Harmon
and he's in the bag.
407
00:18:22,679 --> 00:18:25,015
I'll be waiting in my office.
408
00:18:28,518 --> 00:18:30,729
Bugs? Again?
409
00:18:30,729 --> 00:18:33,648
What's he got, a fetish?
410
00:18:33,648 --> 00:18:36,318
Mr. Harmon, you're considering
hiring this agency
411
00:18:36,318 --> 00:18:37,569
to handle your advertising
412
00:18:37,569 --> 00:18:39,237
because we're specialists
in the field.
413
00:18:39,237 --> 00:18:40,947
So just sit there and listen
414
00:18:40,947 --> 00:18:43,367
to what this specialist
has to say.
415
00:18:43,367 --> 00:18:46,620
I think I'm listening
to a first-class fruitcake.
416
00:18:46,620 --> 00:18:48,372
Darrin, I don't think
we should waste any more
417
00:18:48,372 --> 00:18:50,248
of Mr. Harmon's valuable time.
418
00:18:50,248 --> 00:18:52,584
Larry, you may stay and listen
only if you promise
419
00:18:52,584 --> 00:18:53,919
not to interrupt again.
420
00:18:53,919 --> 00:18:56,380
Now just a mo--
Ah...
421
00:18:56,380 --> 00:18:57,839
Please, sit down.
422
00:19:03,428 --> 00:19:04,763
[CHUCKLES]
423
00:19:06,723 --> 00:19:08,225
I'm warning both of you
424
00:19:08,225 --> 00:19:09,976
that these interruptions
are beginning
425
00:19:09,976 --> 00:19:11,937
to make me very impatient.
426
00:19:11,937 --> 00:19:14,564
Stephens has been sick.
427
00:19:14,564 --> 00:19:16,233
Very unusual virus.
428
00:19:16,233 --> 00:19:17,359
Oh, really?
429
00:19:17,359 --> 00:19:19,111
Must have picked up
some kind of bug.
430
00:19:21,071 --> 00:19:22,906
Virus.
431
00:19:26,451 --> 00:19:30,622
Now, the, uh, grasshopper,
the caterpillar and the ladybug
432
00:19:30,622 --> 00:19:32,916
represent the smaller
investors marching
433
00:19:32,916 --> 00:19:35,293
into Harmon Savings and Loan.
434
00:19:35,293 --> 00:19:36,670
Please, Stephens,
435
00:19:36,670 --> 00:19:38,547
I don't think
of my investors as bugs.
436
00:19:38,547 --> 00:19:39,798
Darrin, I don't think that--
437
00:19:39,798 --> 00:19:42,634
Mr. Tate,
will you please be quiet?
438
00:19:43,760 --> 00:19:45,137
[CHUCKLES]
439
00:19:47,347 --> 00:19:50,016
Now, these small investors--
440
00:19:50,016 --> 00:19:52,352
Please, Stephens,
they're bugs.
441
00:19:52,352 --> 00:19:53,770
Bugs are bugs.
442
00:19:53,770 --> 00:19:56,440
That is the last interruption
I will tolerate.
443
00:19:56,440 --> 00:19:58,066
Now, just sit there and listen
444
00:19:58,066 --> 00:20:01,736
and in a moment,
something will hit you
445
00:20:01,736 --> 00:20:03,196
and you'll love it.
446
00:20:07,117 --> 00:20:08,368
To repeat...
447
00:20:10,370 --> 00:20:12,998
they represent
the smaller investors marching
448
00:20:12,998 --> 00:20:16,168
into Harmon Savings and Loan.
449
00:20:16,168 --> 00:20:19,796
And the slogan
for this campaign will be:
450
00:20:21,923 --> 00:20:23,967
"At Harmon Savings and Loan,
451
00:20:23,967 --> 00:20:26,636
"there are no small investors.
452
00:20:26,636 --> 00:20:30,390
They're as big as you are,
whoever you are."
453
00:20:35,479 --> 00:20:37,105
Are you finished?
454
00:20:37,105 --> 00:20:38,231
Yes.
455
00:20:39,483 --> 00:20:40,776
All right, then.
456
00:20:40,776 --> 00:20:42,319
Let's break up
this meeting, Darrin,
457
00:20:42,319 --> 00:20:45,322
so you can get home
and start a year's sick leave.
458
00:20:46,823 --> 00:20:50,285
Please, Mr. Stephens,
may I say something now?
459
00:20:50,285 --> 00:20:51,536
Of course.
460
00:20:51,536 --> 00:20:54,831
"At Harmon Savings and Loan,
461
00:20:54,831 --> 00:20:57,334
"there are no small investors.
462
00:20:57,334 --> 00:21:00,837
They're as big as you are,
whoever you are."
463
00:21:04,508 --> 00:21:06,801
It rings a bell. I like it.
464
00:21:08,011 --> 00:21:10,013
Darrin, get the phone.
465
00:21:10,013 --> 00:21:11,306
Phone?
466
00:21:11,306 --> 00:21:13,683
[LAUGHS]
467
00:21:13,683 --> 00:21:15,727
It must have been.
468
00:21:15,727 --> 00:21:17,938
I heard that bell ringing too.
469
00:21:17,938 --> 00:21:19,731
It's an inspiration, my boy.
470
00:21:19,731 --> 00:21:21,942
Stephens...
471
00:21:23,485 --> 00:21:26,696
I've never seen an idea
presented with more confidence.
472
00:21:26,696 --> 00:21:27,864
I'm impressed.
473
00:21:27,864 --> 00:21:29,074
It's your kind of enthusiasm
474
00:21:29,074 --> 00:21:31,034
that makes ours a great country.
475
00:21:31,034 --> 00:21:34,371
Mr. Harmon, this is going
to be great for you.
476
00:21:34,371 --> 00:21:37,040
The grasshopper,
the caterpillar and the ladybug
477
00:21:37,040 --> 00:21:38,542
represent the little people.
478
00:21:38,542 --> 00:21:40,210
You see--
I get it, Tate.
479
00:21:40,210 --> 00:21:41,878
You don't have
to explain it to me.
480
00:21:41,878 --> 00:21:43,797
Besides,
at Harmon Savings and Loan,
481
00:21:43,797 --> 00:21:45,298
there are no little people.
482
00:21:45,298 --> 00:21:47,926
They're as big as you are,
whoever you are.
483
00:21:47,926 --> 00:21:49,511
Right, Stephens?
484
00:21:49,511 --> 00:21:50,720
Right, Harmon.
485
00:21:50,720 --> 00:21:52,055
[BOTH LAUGH]
486
00:21:54,307 --> 00:21:56,184
Let's see
those little fellows again.
487
00:21:56,184 --> 00:21:57,310
Yeah.
488
00:21:58,061 --> 00:21:59,229
Ah!
489
00:21:59,229 --> 00:22:00,397
[LAUGHS]
490
00:22:01,731 --> 00:22:03,858
[♪♪]
491
00:22:15,245 --> 00:22:16,663
Hi, sweetheart.
492
00:22:16,663 --> 00:22:17,998
How'd it go?
493
00:22:18,707 --> 00:22:19,916
Oh, it went great.
494
00:22:19,916 --> 00:22:21,084
I mean, why shouldn't it?
495
00:22:21,084 --> 00:22:22,335
It was a foregone conclusion.
496
00:22:22,335 --> 00:22:25,255
Well, that calls
for a celebration.
497
00:22:27,257 --> 00:22:29,092
Why is it I don't feel
like celebrating?
498
00:22:29,092 --> 00:22:31,261
I don't know. Why is it?
499
00:22:31,261 --> 00:22:34,264
All the way home I was asking
myself the same question.
500
00:22:34,264 --> 00:22:36,099
I mean,
501
00:22:36,099 --> 00:22:38,643
I'm not sure I like not having
502
00:22:38,643 --> 00:22:40,770
to worry about anything.
503
00:22:40,770 --> 00:22:42,856
It isn't much fun knowing
504
00:22:42,856 --> 00:22:45,233
how everything
is going to turn out, is it?
505
00:22:46,276 --> 00:22:48,570
Well, there is something
to be said
506
00:22:48,570 --> 00:22:51,156
for worrying about where
your next meal is coming from.
507
00:22:51,156 --> 00:22:54,367
Gives you a chance
to work up an appetite.
508
00:22:54,367 --> 00:22:56,119
[GIGGLES]
509
00:22:56,119 --> 00:22:59,831
Sam, could you kind
of back up time, like,
510
00:22:59,831 --> 00:23:03,501
to before we made
this witchcraft deal today?
511
00:23:03,501 --> 00:23:04,836
I'd like to reconsider.
512
00:23:05,962 --> 00:23:09,132
I, um-- It isn't necessary.
513
00:23:11,593 --> 00:23:13,553
Oh, yes, it is, because--
514
00:23:15,388 --> 00:23:17,140
What do you mean,
it isn't necessary?
515
00:23:19,100 --> 00:23:23,980
Uh... Well,
the way you're feeling now,
516
00:23:23,980 --> 00:23:25,565
I guess you won't mind.
517
00:23:25,565 --> 00:23:27,817
I hope you won't mind.
518
00:23:27,817 --> 00:23:29,027
Are you gonna mind?
519
00:23:29,027 --> 00:23:31,863
Come on. Come on.
520
00:23:31,863 --> 00:23:33,615
Out with it.
521
00:23:33,615 --> 00:23:34,866
O-o-okay.
522
00:23:34,866 --> 00:23:37,369
Witchcraft had nothing to do
523
00:23:37,369 --> 00:23:39,788
with what happened
in your meeting this afternoon.
524
00:23:39,788 --> 00:23:42,248
Are you trying
to tell me that--?
525
00:23:42,248 --> 00:23:44,626
That that purple routine
was just--?
526
00:23:44,626 --> 00:23:47,504
Was just a way of helping
you regain your confidence.
527
00:23:47,504 --> 00:23:49,589
You didn't believe me
this morning when I told you
528
00:23:49,589 --> 00:23:52,008
there wasn't a spell on you,
but it was true.
529
00:23:52,008 --> 00:23:54,177
Wait a minute.
530
00:23:54,177 --> 00:23:56,971
That means I was
in an ordinary slump,
531
00:23:56,971 --> 00:23:59,224
and I did use witchcraft
as an excuse.
532
00:24:00,225 --> 00:24:02,185
It takes you a while, Dobbin,
533
00:24:02,185 --> 00:24:04,854
but you finally
have the picture.
534
00:24:05,980 --> 00:24:08,858
And I went
to that meeting thinking--
535
00:24:08,858 --> 00:24:11,861
Sam, that was a terrible chance
to take.
536
00:24:11,861 --> 00:24:14,197
I wasn't taking any chances.
537
00:24:14,197 --> 00:24:15,990
You told me your idea
was a good one.
538
00:24:15,990 --> 00:24:18,702
Just because
the client is difficult
539
00:24:18,702 --> 00:24:21,705
to convince doesn't mean
the idea will fail.
540
00:24:21,705 --> 00:24:23,456
You said that yourself.
541
00:24:23,456 --> 00:24:25,333
Yeah.
542
00:24:25,333 --> 00:24:26,960
I did say that, didn't I?
543
00:24:26,960 --> 00:24:28,712
On the other hand,
544
00:24:28,712 --> 00:24:30,004
it probably will.
545
00:24:30,004 --> 00:24:32,882
Stop paying attention
to her
546
00:24:32,882 --> 00:24:34,968
and start paying attention
to me.
547
00:24:39,556 --> 00:24:40,890
[GIGGLES]
548
00:24:41,683 --> 00:24:43,101
[♪♪]
549
00:24:46,396 --> 00:24:48,231
[♪♪]
37999
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof